Iraq Adopts Color-Coded Terror Alert System
Superpower07
02-12-2004, 00:44
Source (http://www.theonion.com/news/index.php?issue=4048)
BAGHDAD—The Iraqi Department of Homeland Security recently released a 10-level, color-coded homeland security advisory system that will alert citizens to the risk of a terrorist attack within Iraq's borders. The country's current threat level is elevated, or Code Yellow-Orange. Citizens living in towns with populations of 1,500 or more should prepare for the smoke of burning vehicles to obscure the sun and expect hostages to be tortured for several days before being killed. Should the terror risk level rise to Code Orange-Yellow, it is likely that hostages will be left alive only long enough to dig their own graves.
I must say that this is a monumental day in Iraq for fighting against terror
The Iraqi Department of Homeland Security!?!? Wow, they are relly getting somewhere! Do they have McDonalds as well?
The Iraqi Department of Homeland Security!?!? Wow, they are relly getting somewhere! Do they have McDonalds as well?
Soon they will be enjoying the chronic obesity and mass ignorance that come with Freedom™!
East Coast Federation
02-12-2004, 01:29
Just like the American Color Coded system, it doesn't mean anything.
Bush and his minions use this stupid color coded system to strike fear into the hearts of americans stupid enough to beleive it. Face it kids, it will never go blue or green.
Iraq? It will never go below red with the way things are going now!
Chess Squares
02-12-2004, 01:45
Soon they will be enjoying the chronic obesity and mass ignorance that come with Freedom™!
and arresting people for being middle eastern near airports...wait.. that may be troublesome
Tactical Grace
02-12-2004, 02:25
http://www.theonion.com/images/414/article3028.jpg
I couldn't stop laughing! :D
http://www.theonion.com/images/414/article3028.jpg
I couldn't stop laughing! :D
Brilliant!
Arenestho
02-12-2004, 02:36
That's great. Pure genius.
Superpower07
02-12-2004, 03:31
and arresting people for being middle eastern near airports...wait.. that may be troublesome
Maybe it'll be arresting people for being American at airports, in a little while
New Foxxinnia
02-12-2004, 03:48
Just like the American Color Coded system, it doesn't mean anything.
Bush and his minions use this stupid color coded system to strike fear into the hearts of americans stupid enough to beleive it. Face it kids, it will never go blue or green.
Iraq? It will never go below red with the way things are going now!I'm going to consider you retarded for now on.
LordaeronII
02-12-2004, 03:54
Just like the American Color Coded system, it doesn't mean anything.
Bush and his minions use this stupid color coded system to strike fear into the hearts of americans stupid enough to beleive it. Face it kids, it will never go blue or green.
Iraq? It will never go below red with the way things are going now!
a) This article is from TheOnion
b) Even if it weren't, and it were real, your claims are still ridiculous. People always BS about Bush "scare tactics" but isn't it funny that EVERYONE SAYS THAT. If Bush were really going around scaring most of the country, how come half of the people are saying "HE'S JUST TRYING TO SCARE YOU! I'M SO SMART I CAN SEE THROUGH IT" while the other half are saying "what? I'm scared? Why wasn't I informed of this?"
So basically no one is scared, just a common line used against Bush because people have nothing real against him. (Well they do, but this sure as hell isn't one of them)
Sel Appa
02-12-2004, 04:03
{mock}I must say that this is another piece of prrof that Iraq is and will remain so a puppet of the US.{/mock}
The color system provides no information whatsoever and has proven very inaccurate in the US. If you dont know of a specific threat, don't report it.
New Foxxinnia
02-12-2004, 04:09
http://graphics.theonion.com/global_pics/onion_logo.gif
Have any of you even heard of this before?
Zeppistan
02-12-2004, 05:33
The Iraqi Department of Homeland Security!?!? Wow, they are relly getting somewhere! Do they have McDonalds as well?
OF COURSE they have McDonalds. Eating out is a big pastime in Iraq.
Especially since so many of them don't have.... houses anymore....
Violets and Kitties
02-12-2004, 05:41
a) This article is from TheOnion
Sometimes there can be truth in satire. The Onion was the first 'newspaper' to predict the war in Iraq.
OF COURSE they have McDonalds. Eating out is a big pastime in Iraq.
Especially since so many of them don't have.... houses anymore....
Is it then safe to assume that camping is all the rage, ...do we see a business opportunity...seizing the day, kind of....like...foldable chairs and stuff?
I wonder if sales of duct tape have gone up since they got a homeland security department?
Sel Appa
03-12-2004, 04:52
An Iraqi Department of Homeland Security? COME ON! Leave the people to do what they want, not some appointed Bush-hugging Colin Powell look-alikes.
I don't get that Americans NEVER accept change, yet force everyone else to change. I hate this country, why can't New Jersey leave already...
New Foxxinnia
03-12-2004, 04:56
An Iraqi Department of Homeland Security? COME ON! Leave the people to do what they want, not some appointed Bush-hugging Colin Powell look-alikes.
I don't get that Americans NEVER accept change, yet force everyone else to change. I hate this country, why can't New Jersey leave already...http://graphics.theonion.com/global_pics/onion_logo.gif
HELLO? HELLO?
I saw this. Very hilarious. :) And ironically, the satirical color-code is more informative than the f'real color-code. I mean, seriously, what am I supposed to do if America goes to code red? Pee my pants? Duct-tape everything that can be duct-taped? Repent?