NationStates Jolt Archive

I was thinking the other day; what about disabled people?

If a disabled guy, let's say he's reasonably good looking and a nice person asked you out on a date or something, what would be your honest reaction?

Same question for us guys; if a nice disabled girl asked you out, would you REALLY look beyond the obvious disability and love them for who they really are? Or run...?

I dated a blind girl once.

I was thinking the other day; what about disabled people?

If a disabled guy, let's say he's reasonably good looking and a nice person asked you out on a date or something, what would be your honest reaction?

Same question for us guys; if a nice disabled girl asked you out, would you REALLY look beyond the obvious disability and love them for who they really are? Or run...?

Stupid question. It would depend fully on who it was. I never say who I would go out with cos that's generalisation. I prefer black haired women to blondes, but I have dated a blonde before. Depends on who it is and what they are like.

what do you mean disabled?

Blind? Deaf? Quadraplegic? No arms?

It really does depend. Not directly. I really don't care one way or the other about such things. Even looks don't matter as much as other things.

Such as a dirty mind, a playful spirit, a positive attitude and a sense of humor.

But if she has no vocal cords, how can she laugh? If she's paralysed from the neck-down, how are we going to have sex in an airplane bathroom?

In the way of friendship, these things may not matter. But for me, to engage in a long-term relationship, I need a smart, horny, witty girl.

Beyond that, I really am not concerned with disabilities. I have a maturity disability. I'm willing to accept others'.

Bravo

cripples need lovin too

but depending ....
though i did date a retarded girl for a week i didnt realize she couldnt tie her own shoes till after i asked her out (when i was so high i could have gotten others baked though osmosis) and i didnt want to take the offer back becaus i may be an a$$hole but not that much of one, but luckly she broke up with me, which really hurt my self esteam, not even good enough for the mentally challenged

cripples need lovin too

but depending ....
though i did date a retarded girl for a week i didnt realize she couldnt tie her own shoes till after i asked her out (when i was so high i could have gotten others baked though osmosis) and i didnt want to take the offer back becaus i may be an a$$hole but not that much of one, but luckly she broke up with me, which really hurt my self esteam, not even good enough for the mentally challenged


Sounds to me like she realised *she* was the one going out with a retarted cripple.

Sounds to me like she realised *she* was the one going out with a retarted cripple.
that hurts. :(

Sounds to me like she realised *she* was the one going out with a retarted cripple.

Zing.

Sounds to me like she realised *she* was the one going out with a retarted cripple.
oooh, pwned

that hurts. :(

It was meant to ;)

I was thinking the other day; what about disabled people?

If a disabled guy, let's say he's reasonably good looking and a nice person asked you out on a date or something, what would be your honest reaction?

Same question for us guys; if a nice disabled girl asked you out, would you REALLY look beyond the obvious disability and love them for who they really are? Or run...?
Well...i went out with a blonde chick, so yes, i looked beyond it

[JK, sorry to all you blondes who are about to start screamin OMG FLAMMEXOR!!!]

anyway, i dont honestly know, i havent had that much contact with disabled people, so i would have to see when and if it actually happened.

Never had the chance. *cries and goes to hide in a cupboard as he can't get a girlfriend*

Wow, I'm surprised the "a blind girl doesn't count" comment hasn't surfaced yet.

Wow, I'm surprised the "a blind girl doesn't count" comment hasn't surfaced yet.

It just has.

Wow, I'm surprised the "a blind girl doesn't count" comment hasn't surfaced yet.

What about a 'I once dated a blind girl' and 'Figures' comment?

It just has.

*stab*

I dated a blind girl once.

Figures.

What about a 'I once dated a blind girl' and 'Figures' comment?

Well yeah. Those I expect.

Yup. Definetely figures.

Would anyone go out with a disabled person

Not just anyone.

Yeah, I mean disabled people are people, not some different species. In fact there's this girl who, I'm not sure if she was born without part of her arm from the elbow down, or maybe it was an accident; who I would date, shes very attractive and a great girl so I mean, I don't see anything wrong with it.

Yup. Definetely figures.

I hate you all with an undying passion.

Does it really matter what they look like or even act like? It is what your heart thinks... Personally I do not want to go out with a handicapped person, just like a would never date a average intelligence person, someone with brown eyes, or a smoker. That is just my heart telling me the guy I will end up with isn't someone who has physical probelms, isnt stupid, doesnt have brown eyes and doesnt smoke. Isnt there someone meant for everyone? It shouldnt matter what they look like. It should only matter what your heart feels. *smile*
~Cat~
btw: I have a bf.

...just like a would never date a average intelligence person....

Don't want to be shown up, eh?:)

Does moral disability count?

If I fell in love/ fancied them then yes. But I wouldn't go out with them because they were disabled.

The part of your brain/mind/whatever that goes 'Hey, s/he's really cool' doesn't suddenly stop working when you see a disability.

If I fell in love/ fancied them then yes. But I wouldn't go out with them because they were disabled.

The part of your brain/mind/whatever that goes 'Hey, s/he's really cool' doesn't suddenly stop working when you see a disability.

Exactly. A disabled girl can still have really big boobs.:)

Exactly. A disabled girl can still have really big boobs.:)

:rolleyes:

The part of your brain/mind/whatever that goes 'Hey, s/he's really cool' doesn't suddenly stop working when you see a disability.

But yeah, that right there, that'd be it.

I think I would :sniper: someone who said "go out with them? they're a cripple" or something.

:rolleyes:



But yeah, that right there, that'd be it.

I think I would :sniper: someone who said "go out with them? they're a cripple" or something.

Oi! I was just joking. I've dated a disabled person before.

Met a guy online once & talked to him for ages before deciding to meet up. He then tells me that he only has 1 leg (he had a false one) & fused fingers, am I gonna be ok about this? TBH I didn't know - never having had this experience before. I met him & I still felt that same way - he was the same person I had talked to & liked.
You have to be pretty immature & shallow to judge a person by their exterior.

You have to be pretty immature & shallow to judge a person by their exterior.
Definately. Anyway as the saying goes, "Love is Blind". When you fall for someone they become the most marvelous person on the face of the planet, regardless of what other people see or think of them.

don't worry about it. :p I know ya were

Oi! I was just joking. I've dated a disabled person before.

a blind girl doesn't count

a blind girl doesn't count
Waarom?
Why?

a blind girl doesn't count

Yeah. Why not?

I was thinking the other day; what about disabled people?

If a disabled guy, let's say he's reasonably good looking and a nice person asked you out on a date or something, what would be your honest reaction?

Same question for us guys; if a nice disabled girl asked you out, would you REALLY look beyond the obvious disability and love them for who they really are? Or run...?

Dated a paraplegic woman for some time. Also others with physical disabilities.

And I work with idiots, does that count? ;)

Seriously, people are people. Why does the shell matter?

Sounds to me like she realised *she* was the one going out with a retarted cripple.

that was harsh...

I know a guy that is missing half a arm and can't blink normaly and he gets the HOTTESt chics! I asked him how he did it and he said he's just 'nice to them.'

And infact he does treat them really good! So I guess the girls would rather be with him than some jock who talks about sports all the time. (snicker)

Thats tough, but it really depends, actually, probably not, I am kinda freaked out by disabled people sometimes, its not me, I try, I just get a little freaked out by, disabled people, hospitals, that kinda thing.

Thats tough, but it really depends, actually, probably not, I am kinda freaked out by disabled people sometimes, its not me, I try, I just get a little freaked out by, disabled people, hospitals, that kinda thing.
Thats the shock of difference. Someone who has unusual qualities stands out and if we have little experience of it we don't quite know what to do or say. We get self conscious and awkward. Its quite normal and is overcome by getting to used to the difference.

There are all sorts and degrees of "disabled." I have about 2 lbs of metal holding my right leg together, but there's no easy way to tell that the military has me listed as 40% disabled. I have no problems dating, even women lots younger than me.

On the other hand, some disabilities are almost painfully obvious. I suspect most people would factor disabilities they can see into their decisions about who to date. I've also known a very few people who will date a disabled person simply because they want to prove that they're not prejudiced. Somehow, this latter seems more discriminatory than NOT dating someone because of their disability.

When I married my wife twenty years ago she was fit, healthy and gorgeous, two years ago she was struck down with viral encephalitis, she has a right side paraplegia and epilepsy now, her symptoms are much the same as a stroke victims, she is classed as disabled and needs help with everything from bathing to walking, she cannot go out alone and needs help 24/7 but you know what! she's still gorgeous, reletively healthy (despite her disabilities) and I love her more now than I ever did before.
Disability shouldn't be a factor on whether someone is "worth" dating.

I had a HUGE crush on a deaf girl in college.

Never happened, though. :(

My wife's got cerebral palsy. Never bothered me - I fell in love with her and fifteen years, two kids, four houses, half a dozen cats and a stack of cars later I still am.
One of my neighbours is blind, but she's been married for years and had two kids, and another's a wheelchair user and she's been married 15 years and has three kids.

It's no big deal - just that's part of who they are.

Such as a dirty mind, a playful spirit, a positive attitude and a sense of humor.

But if she has no vocal cords, how can she laugh?Why should an inability to laugh out loud affect someone's sense of humour?

It might affect how well you feel your jokes go down, but you'd soon adapt to pick up other clues - like the thwack round the back of the head when you've told the same Mother-in-Law joke for the third time that week.

Like the one guy said... it depends. Confined to a wheelchair, sure. Full-body paralysis - probably not. Mentally retarded, no. It depends on how it affects their capabilities. I don't need my partner to be able to walk, but if they can't make out normally that's a big minus and if they can't hold an intelligent conversation then forget it.

Some things however might even enhance the relationship - for example if I were to go out with someone without vocal cords, we'd have to find nonverbal ways to communicate.

Back in the 70's I was at a local watering hole and saw the cutest face you ever did see. Now having a few in me I approached her and struck up a conversation. I noticed she had no legs and her left hand was gone. Now feeling like a jerk I made up for it by hanging out with her that evening. She lost her limbs when she was a kid in a farm accident.

We hit it off and she let me drive her home. No along the way we were feeling hot and heavy, so we stopped in a dark place and did what comes naturally. Anyway I felt guilty and drove her home. I helped her to the door when her pa came out.

I confided in him that I felt terrible having done that. He said that it was ok and that I was a gentlemen. He said this happened before a couple of times and that the two jerks just left her there by the side of the road. One even took her wheelchair. I felt alot better and dated her for a while. I would have married her but she was killed in a house fire.

I had sex with a woman in a coma once. God I love working in a hospital. Free poontang everywhere I look.

i think you'd have to get to know them the same as any non disabled person. i know dozens of non disabled men who i'd never go anywhere near! i've been brought up with the attitude of everyone is a person, regardless of what they look like.

Er.. yes?

I'm tempted to make my only contribue " :rolleyes: ". Gee, having a broken leg's a disability :rolleyes: ! Having some severe burns can be a disability! Even raising the question's ignorant, no offense. Oh, and "if she was good-looking?" I know plenty of good-looking idiots, morons, etc. I hate bin Laden, yet I can't help feeling he looks kind. My best friend in the US was not a "pretty" girl by many's standards, but still she was charming, friendly, sensitive, caring, and cute. Looks have little to say as you date to have a fun, good time, not to sit there for an hour staring at your date (although it's easy to end up doing that :fluffle:, of course ).

It's like when my school had this campaign against drunk driving and they showed this beutiful girl who was horribly scarred from being trapped inside a burning car after the car was hit by a drunk driver. My geography teacher went "if she was married to you, would you still be with her?" :mad: No offense towards him, he was a nice, sensitive man, but...

But anyways, yes, if you like someone and you want to go out with them, you go out with them. :rolleyes: I'm really tempted to call you things like "nazistic", etc., but I won't as this is, after all, a debate forum and not a mud-slinging pit.

a blind girl doesn't count
Read up on the definition of "disabled" :mad: . Geez,

Nice Story, "the True Right". Very touching :) . I'm sorry for you. And I hope you realize that what you did is nothing to feel guilty about.

Disabled people are people too, I'll end with that. Just another person who's been hit by a car, born without eye-sight, etc.

Wow, I made it through that post without insulting the person who started this thread! Where's my '04 Forum Tolerance Price™ ;) ? I'm honestly proud of myself (and that's not sarcasm ;) )!

Depends on what disability (namely, would that disability affect our relationship if I did?)

I had sex with a woman in a coma once. God I love working in a hospital. Free poontang everywhere I look.


wow

Actually, I'm disabled myself...so I think I know what I'm talking about. I can't come up with quite so sad a story as that other person just now, but the girl I love turned me down and my disability was a big facter in it. I was curious to know whether it's a common thing in relationships. Some of the messages in this thread have been heart-warming.

Thanks guys.

I had sex with a woman in a coma once. God I love working in a hospital. Free poontang everywhere I look.
That is just disgusting and not cool...

That is just disgusting and not cool...

It's also complete and utter bullshit.