NationStates Jolt Archive

I punched a baby once-

I body slammed a puppy-

I Dropped kicked a kitty-

I helped an old lady cross the street only to mug her on the other side-


---Come up with more!---

I voted for george bush. (scum middle class, scum foreign civilians, die and rot in hell)

I ducttaped a kid naked to a toilet(I was a kid at the time too, ya sickies!)

I knocked out one of my best friends with chloroform and encased him in a full-body cast and had a tickle-torture party.

Typically, when playing contact sports, I try to 'accidentally' strike my opponents in the groin.

I consider friends who pass out at parties to be open season for entertaining mischief.

I once superglued a dildo to the rear bumper of someone's car.

Currently, I'm involved in a series of encounters with my friends that we call, 'Stun Gun Tag'. I'll let your imagination do the rest. :)

I punched a baby once-

I body slammed a puppy-

I Dropped kicked a kitty-

I helped an old lady cross the street only to mug her on the other side-


---Come up with more!---

If you really did these things, then you should but put away for a very long time. You are a truely sick person to even think up such madness.

If you really did these things, then you should but put away for a very long time. You are a truely sick person to even think up such madness.

*blink* We were supposed to make stuff up?

*blink* We were supposed to make stuff up?
lol

*blink* We were supposed to make stuff up?

Like I said, he is a sick person to even think up these things.

I brought my roommate to tears by telling him numerous times to kill himself because he had no friends. :D Well, to be fair, a friend of mine had an equal part in making him cry...

I ducttaped a kid naked to a toilet(I was a kid at the time too, ya sickies!)

I knocked out one of my best friends with chloroform and encased him in a full-body cast and had a tickle-torture party.

Typically, when playing contact sports, I try to 'accidentally' strike my opponents in the groin.

I consider friends who pass out at parties to be open season for entertaining mischief.

I once superglued a dildo to the rear bumper of someone's car.

Currently, I'm involved in a series of encounters with my friends that we call, 'Stun Gun Tag'. I'll let your imagination do the rest. :)

Oooh! Tickle-torture party!


I can't talk about the evil things I do... if I do, I lose my whole 'totally sweet and innocent little girl' image, and then I lose the element of surprise, which I need.

I once superglued a dildo to the rear bumper of someone's car.


I once glued a bloody (used ketup) rubber to the back of a co-workers car :)

Like I said, he is a sick person to even think up these things.

Hardly. I could do better.

Though staying within the rules of the forum while doing so would be a challenge.

Here goes:

I grease the bars in handicapped bathroom stalls.
I open packages of underwear at the store and powder them with red pepper.
I taint public water supplies.
I once pooped out of a hot-air balloon over an amusement park.

See? :)

I distincly remember keying a car one time, but I can't for the life of me remember whose car or why I did it. But trust me, they deserved it.

Oooh! Tickle-torture party!


I can't talk about the evil things I do... if I do, I lose my whole 'totally sweet and innocent little girl' image, and then I lose the element of surprise, which I need.

I find that people tend to think I'm innocent and naive. For a while.

Must be my impish grin.

I once masturbated into a bottle for quite awhile. It took me two months to fill it up and it smelled horrible anyway. I sold it to a Chinese guy as herbalistic medicine.

Another time I tried to cut my neighbors grass (while completely wasted) with a floor buffer and ran over their dog three times!

Ooooh.... and the time I dropped bottle rockets behing every toilet in a school so for like three weeks third graders were constantly pissing themselves.

I also draw penises on my friends faces when they fall asleep during a Halo party.

Hardly. I could do better.

Though staying within the rules of the forum while doing so would be a challenge.

Here goes:

I grease the bars in handicapped bathroom stalls.
I open packages of underwear at the store and powder them with red pepper.
I taint public water supplies.
I once pooped out of a hot-air balloon over an amusement park.

See? :)
I salute you!

Oh yeah, that same roommate I mentioned earlier- I pissed in his Listerine a couple times. He never noticed.

Oh, I also cock-slapped a friend of mine one time when he was sitting at his desk doing some shit on his computer.

I find that people tend to think I'm innocent and naive. For a while.

Must be my impish grin.

Lucky sod.

I personally need all the misdirection I can get... luckily I'm smallish and female and collect children's toys. 'S all the misdirection I can hope for.

Apparently *my* grin makes people nervous... especially the ones that have seen me lusting over large knives (... it was a JOKE! I was at a halloween party! *grumbles*!)

Remember. I actually convinced a beautiful woman that I'd make a good husband and father. My skills are uber! :D

made ass prints all over my friend's car windows

Oh, and one time, I told this girl that my friend had a crush on that he had a small penis. It was funny. Actually, I think I told her that a number of times...

Oh, and one time, I told this girl that my friend had a crush on that he had a small penis. It was funny. Actually, I think I told her that a number of times...

did he?

did he?
Yeah, actually he did, which is why I found it odd that he was naked a lot of the time. So the fact that he had a small penis was no secret, but I just wanted to make sure this girl knew. Because I'm an asshole like that.

Sounds like a public service.

but then again, I once froze someone's mattress in college.

I'm an asshole too. :)

I really didn't realize how much of an asshole I was 'til I started posting in this thread. Damn, I can be a real dick sometimes!

Hardly. I could do better.

Though staying within the rules of the forum while doing so would be a challenge.

Here goes:

I grease the bars in handicapped bathroom stalls.
I open packages of underwear at the store and powder them with red pepper.
I taint public water supplies.
I once pooped out of a hot-air balloon over an amusement park.

See? :)

my mundane malevolence can in no way compete with that. I salute you

I really didn't realize how much of an asshole I was 'til I started posting in this thread. Damn, I can be a real dick sometimes!

Welcome to the club, brother. :)

I once took a shit on the roof of a car.

And last year, there were a few kids whose rooms I would go to and not leave until they'd given me food. I love being an asshole...

I think this thread kinda evolved from making stuff up, into saying what you actually did lol.

I think this thread kinda evolved from making stuff up, into saying what you actually did lol.
Uh... Yeah, that happened a while ago. The stuff I've actually done is much more interesting than anything I could make up.

Uh... Yeah, that happened a while ago. The stuff I've actually done is much more interesting than anything I could make up.

Yeah, I have come to find this thread funny.

It's very therapeutic. I think if I weren't such a happy-go-lucky mischef-making silly jackass lunatic I'd most likely be an angry tinfoil hat wearing clocktower climbing high-powered rifle wielding psychotic lunatic.

Both of which are fun, but only one of which I can be proud of. I think I chose correctly.

I think this thread kinda evolved from making stuff up, into saying what you actually did lol.

Yep. Except for that one example of what I can make up, I haven't made anything up. *nod* I've done enough.

The amount of virgin girls I have...deflowered.

The amount of virgin girls I have...deflowered.
Now that's just bastardy. BTW anyone like the stuff I actually did in my post.