NationStates Jolt Archive

Better one bird in your hand, than no hand

It's better to have loved and lost than have never loved a llama.

If it wasn't for my horse, I wouldn't have spent that year in college.

Ah, an opportunity for some Ronglish!

"It was half a dozen of one and half a dozen of the other."

Two rights make a wrong.

Money makes the world go upside down.

Monkeys can buy you love.

"If you give a man fire, he will be warm for a night. If you set a man on fire, he will be warm for the rest of his life."

Duct tape is like The Force. It has a light side and a dark side, and somehow holds everything in the universe together.

A dog is for dinner, not just for christmas.

A dog is for dinner, not just for christmas.

"Dogs don't kill people, rabbits do"

"It is easier for a rich man to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a camel to."

Share or shaft alike.

There is no spoon. (actually subliminal advertising for Batchelor's Cup-A-Soups)

Share or shaft alike.

I just have one word to make this even more amusing to "Have I Got News For You" fans:

Kilroy.

Two rights make a wrong.

"Two wrongs won't make a right, but three lefts will."

Monkeys and trasdimensional accelerators don't mix.

I just have one word to make this even more amusing to "Have I Got News For You" fans:

Kilroy.

where do you think I got the quote from? Probably one of the funniest things they've had.

"It is easier for a rich man to pass through the eye of a needle than it is for a camel to."
"It is easier for a man to pass through a camel than through the eye of a camel."

It's better to have loved and lost than have never loved a llama.

"It's better to have loved and lost. Much better."

You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.

Too many cooks bankrupt the restaurant.

Here's a famous British saying:

"Your attention please. We are sorry that the ... to ... is delayed by approximately ... minutes. ... ... Trains apologise for this delay and any inconvenience it may cause you."

You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.
"You can lead a whore to culture but you cannot make her think."

(free cookie for the poster who knows who said that)

You can lead a horse to water but you can't make him drink.

You can lead Edgar Allen Poe to a whiskey bottle and you can bet your last penny he will drink.

"You can lead a whore to culture but you cannot make her think."

(free cookie for the poster who knows who said that)

A pimp?

You can lead Edgar Allen Poe to a whiskey bottle and you can bet your last penny he will drink.

Meh that fool had it coming

"You can lead a whore to culture but you cannot make her think."

(free cookie for the poster who knows who said that)Dorothy Parker

where do you think I got the quote from? Probably one of the funniest things they've had.

And they play it every week. Sorry, didn't realise you were British.

From my very own region of Europe:

The Constitutional Monarchy of Kilroy-Silk (http://www.nationstates.net/cgi-bin/index.cgi/54216/page=display_nation/nation=kilroy-silk)

Meh that fool had it coming

damn straight, i originally wrote charles kennedy, but he's off it now apparently...

A pigeon shitting in the pocket is better than one shitting on your head.

Better one bird in your hand, than no hand

A bird in the hand, shits on the hand.

People who live in glass houses have large heating bills.

Burn a witch, become cursed.

A stitch in lime, causes ryme.

Shaun of the Dead:

Remember, there's no I in team, but there is one in pie. Meat pie, that is. Because meat is an anagram of team, oh I don't know what he meant.

People who live in stone houses shouldn't throw glasses.

'Peed Skills!'

-Fat Freddy, The Fabulous Furry Freak Brothers.

Pirates who are legless are not welcome at ass-kicking parties.

Dorothy Parker
free cookie heading your way!

The quotes about Poe and whisky reminded me about a headline Viz used once about Keith Chegwin (and his battle with the bottle):
"Cheggers can't be boozers"

free cookie heading your way!

yay!

people who live in public houses shouldn't throw up.

On the ship of the legless, the one-legger pirate is captain

Two beer or not two beer

People in glass houses should only shower if they look like the women in FHM Top 100

"For all intensive purposes ..."

People in glass houses should only shower if they look like the women in FHM Top 100
hahaha.... do you have a link? lol

“Anyone who is capable of getting themselves made President should on no account be allowed to do the job.”

-- Douglas Adams

"A mantis has got to do, what a mantis has got to do" - Zorak

If you don't attend people's funerals, they won't attend yours.

The difference between intelligence and stupidity is that intelligence
has its limits.

Do unto other then split.

"Don't judge a man until you've walked a mile in his shoes--because then you have his shoes, and you're a mile away."

Its a game of two halves

If they hadn't scored three more goals than us, we would have won

*signpost near me* reduce pee now

*and close by, on the bottom of a 20mph sign* pee kills

"Sit on it and swivel"
"Fine, but all that will achieve would be to get me aroused and brown your finger"

Take and you will recieve.

Don't put all your grenades into one basket-somone may pull the pin out.

Don't count your hatches before your chickens.

Let them eat snake.

Mirror, signal and hoover.

You get everything for nothing in this world.

A vote for Bob Dole is a vote for erect penis.

If the wind changes, you'll have to sit the other side of me.

Every dog has his teeth.

I liked the Simon Drew picture: Daft as a Bush.


Don't bite your screws!

-Melded from Got milk?-

Got clinton? (Cue image of monica with white line on her lips...) :D

Better one vagina in your hand, than the air of ten

Bob's your cross-dressing uncle.

Show me a feminist and I'll show her a pornographic magazine.

You show me mine, and i'll show you yours.

Whatever tickles your perverbial pickle.

Ooh, it made the hare stand up on the back of my neck.

I'll just wet my missal.

As clever as a duck.

what do you get if you cross a fox with a duck? A flock of Fucks. :D

As short as two thick planks.

I thought it was "wet my whistle" ?....

personal favourite- any stout drinker should know this one :
Make like a pint and head

I thought it was "wet my whistle" ?....

personal favourite- any stout drinker should know this one :
Make like a pint and head

Yeah, that was the point.

Make like a tree and bark.
Make like a banana and shake.

Women who thinks "Gaining a man's love is through his stomach" is aiming too high.

Just a little harmful fun... heh heh heh.

Learn Ronglish (http://www.starvingrascal.com/features-ronglish.htm)

"In God we trust" because we really need his help.

A watched pot never boils because you are supposed to turn it on stupid.

The pot calling the grass green

"In God we trust" because we really need his help.

They put "In God we trust" on the back of lots of buses in Tanzania. And it's true! You wouldn't trust the bloody driver, the way they drive.

Sticks and stones may break my bones but I can sue your sorry arse.

Iran has New Clear weapons.