NationStates Jolt Archive

I took my seven month old son to the doctor today for his check-up.

WHile the doctor was examining him, he farted. Now I never heard any baby fart quite so loud. I don't think the doctor had either because she pulls her hand back like he just blew battery acid. Now I'm laughing. My son hears me and starts laughing too. SHe looks at me then at him. "He's definitely your son." She says. I just nod and say, "Yep".

Well, when we get out to the car, I'm strapping my son down like a porcelain doll filled with nitroglycerin when it occurred to me that my mother never used to do this for me. I clearly remember one day, I think I was three. I was laying on the back deck. YOu know, the space where the back window ends and the top of the back seat begins? I used to lay there. Well, I don't know what happened, because I was playing with a matchbox car. But for some reson, my mom had to brake suddenly. I fly off, slam into the back of the seats, and drop into the footwell. My mom and sister freak. My mom looks over the top of her seat at me with wide eyes. I stare back at her from the footwell with equally wide eyes. Then I burst into laughter.

But today, we strap our kids down like porcelain dolls filled with nitroglycerin. Which is fine. I'm all for safety. We are considerably more refined now. Quite unlike the primitive barbarism of the 1970s.

But as a firm believer in the Happy Medium, I can't help wondering if we're taking this too far. I want my son to grow up normal and well adjusted. Like me. Not neurotic and cookie-cutter like the latest batches of 'tweens I've been seeing around lately.

LG, your stories never cease to amaze me and make me smile. :)

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm... Doctors scare me. They poke and prod me and shoot me full of needles and feel around "down south" and if anyone's going down south, it's my girlfriend and most certainly NOT a 8,000-year-old doctor with a gizzard.

Yeah its a 'crack up' story.
And i think people are becoming too overprotective about their children... but these stupid laws that smacking ur kid is illegal??? WTF!!!

Ummmmmmmmmmmmmm... Doctors scare me. They poke and prod me and shoot me full of needles and feel around "down south" and if anyone's going down south, it's my girlfriend and most certainly NOT a 8,000-year-old doctor with a gizzard.

Wait til the prostate exams begin. ;)

Wait til the prostate exams begin. ;)

My gf had to do a project on that for her medicine degree. I was asked to proof read it :eek: :confused: :mad: :headbang: I'm gonna kill myself when i am 40

Wait til the prostate exams begin. ;)
"What you doin wit dat glove doc? Fuck dat! I don't even allow anyone to wave thier finger in my face!"-Tony Soprano.

" My first prostate exam, I was like, 'Oh my god!'.
'I'm just putting on the glove, Mr. Williams.'
A few years later, I moaned another doctor's name. Don't do that.
'Who is Dr. Smith?'
'Nobody! You're the only one!' "-Robin Williams.

Yeah its a 'crack up' story.
And i think people are becoming too overprotective about their children... but these stupid laws that smacking ur kid is illegal??? WTF!!!
Are you serious? You want to raise your kid by smacking him/her? :rolleyes:
I also think that many parents are overprotective and can't say no to their kids but wow, just wow. Obviously some parents have serious problems handling their kids.

God, it was a different world back then. For one, you'd get sent outside to play, and if you came back in, you'd get sent right back out again. Now people don't dare. Kids used to have a chance to scrape their knees once in a while. Now they wrap them in cotton wool. If mom told you that she'd haul you out of the supermarket, by god, she did, and by your ear. If you got paddled, what else did you expect?

It seems to me that people are so scared of what will happen to their kids out in the streets that they'd rather confine them to their rooms, and fill the room with a tv, a computer, a stereo, a phone, a playstation....

When I was a kid, there were two phones in the house, and if you wanted to make a sneaky call, rotary dial was one tricky son of a bitch to do quietly. There was one tv in the house. No such thing as playstation or home computer, let alone internet. Hell, we didn't even have VCRs or remote controls for the first part of childhood. (We did have a remote, only mom and dad didn't know its name was Jacob... ;) )

Are you serious? You want to raise your kid by smacking him/her? :rolleyes:
I don't want children, but if I ever did have any, they would be smacked when they behaved badly. A short, sharp smack is not going to physically or emotionally harm them for any more than about 10 minutes. I know loads of people that were smacked as kids (myself included) - none of them hold it against their parents, are emotionally disturbed by it, and these people evidently respect right and wrong! I've witnessed enough parents shouting 'no, don't do that, it's bad' over and over again while their child persists in doing it, to think that it's an effective measure of discipline.

That said, if you don't want to smack your children, fair enough. I feel it should be a personal parental choice, but of course now the nanny state is poking its nose in. I can quite easily foresee a future where parents are banned from disciplining their children at all!

God, it was a different world back then. For one, you'd get sent outside to play, and if you came back in, you'd get sent right back out again. Now people don't dare. Kids used to have a chance to scrape their knees once in a while. Now they wrap them in cotton wool. If mom told you that she'd haul you out of the supermarket, by god, she did, and by your ear. If you got paddled, what else did you expect?

It seems to me that people are so scared of what will happen to their kids out in the streets that they'd rather confine them to their rooms, and fill the room with a tv, a computer, a stereo, a phone, a playstation....

When I was a kid, there were two phones in the house, and if you wanted to make a sneaky call, rotary dial was one tricky son of a bitch to do quietly. There was one tv in the house. No such thing as playstation or home computer, let alone internet. Hell, we didn't even have VCRs or remote controls for the first part of childhood. (We did have a remote, only mom and dad didn't know its name was Jacob... ;) )

LOL! Well, I remember when our family had the very first television in the entire neighborhood. Kids who were total strangers use to beg to come in and watch it.

My grandparents got their first TV in about 1954. After that, I think a few of my grandma's antiques had "Z" carved into the wood. All of my uncles deny that it was theirs. ;)

My grandparents got their first TV in about 1954. After that, I think a few of my grandma's antiques had "Z" carved into the wood. All of my uncles deny that it was theirs. ;)

Heh! Remember how huge the cabinet was and how small the screen? :)

I've seen them. Yeah, bigtime. I'm a 70's baby, and I still think it's a trip that there might be a majority of kids here who have never seen a rotary dial phone, and who think that black and white is primitive.

I bet it would blow their minds to know that before there were TVs, people read books and listened to the radio. It's strange to know that there are probably people who have never seen an 8 track, and know about records, but have never actually spun one, and they can't imagine a world without the internet.

Am I getting old? I don't feel old, but it hits you when you're at the supermarket checkout and realise that kids born in 1983 can drink legally now, and kids born in 1986 can smoke.

Kids need to be exposed to more dirt too. Their immune systems never develop properly if their parents disinfect everything all the time.

And on smacking, I think a complete ban is taking it too far - there is a big difference between someone abusing their child and a loving parent who's kid has been play up all day - but only if they don't really whack the child of course. There's a danger that families could be needlessly torn apart over that through the law courts, causing far more damage than a simple slap ever could.

I've seen them. Yeah, bigtime. I'm a 70's baby, and I still think it's a trip that there might be a majority of kids here who have never seen a rotary dial phone, and who think that black and white is primitive.

I bet it would blow their minds to know that before there were TVs, people read books and listened to the radio. It's strange to know that there are probably people who have never seen an 8 track, and know about records, but have never actually spun one, and they can't imagine a world without the internet.

Am I getting old? I don't feel old, but it hits you when you're at the supermarket checkout and realise that kids born in 1983 can drink legally now, and kids born in 1986 can smoke.

Or in Britain, that's 1986 and 1988. And my mum has been known to teach children born in 2000.

I don't want children, but if I ever did have any, they would be smacked when they behaved badly. A short, sharp smack is not going to physically or emotionally harm them for any more than about 10 minutes. I know loads of people that were smacked as kids (myself included) - none of them hold it against their parents, are emotionally disturbed by it, and these people evidently respect right and wrong! I've witnessed enough parents shouting 'no, don't do that, it's bad' over and over again while their child persists in doing it, to think that it's an effective measure of discipline.

That said, if you don't want to smack your children, fair enough. I feel it should be a personal parental choice, but of course now the nanny state is poking its nose in. I can quite easily foresee a future where parents are banned from disciplining their children at all!
I'm pretty sure too that a single sharp smack is not going to harm anyone, but still I'm very much against it. If smacking is the only way to make your kid obey, you have more serious problems coming. I'm not saying parents who every now and then smack their child are failed as parents, but if I ever smack my kids (in the future) I will think I've failed. Physical punishment is just very much against my morals.
btw smacking your kid is illegal in my country.

I think people get too worked up about it. Part of the problem with kids now is that they're not given any discipline. Yeah, in the 70's and before, people would beat the hell out of their kids, and that wasn't great, but at least it was better than nothing at all. A lot of people never tell their kids "no" nowadays.

And yes, let them play in the dirt and find the cat turds in the sandbox, by all means. Oh the treasures to be found there! ;)

Seriously, though, I don't think I remember it ever hurting the kids in my generation.

I'm pretty sure too that a single sharp smack is not going to harm anyone, but still I'm very much against it. If smacking is the only way to make your kid obey, you have more serious problems coming. I'm not saying parents who every now and then smack their child are failed as parents, but if I ever smack my kids (in the future) I will think I've failed. Physical punishment is just very much against my morals.
btw smacking your kid is illegal in my country.

You've said a mouthful there. You don't have kids. It's a lot easier to say it from where you stand now, believe me.

I've got to boogie, end of shift, but I'll check back in.

I'm pretty sure too that a single sharp smack is not going to harm anyone, but still I'm very much against it. If smacking is the only way to make your kid obey, you have more serious problems coming. I'm not saying parents who every now and then smack their child are failed as parents, but if I ever smack my kids (in the future) I will think I've failed. Physical punishment is just very much against my morals.
btw smacking your kid is illegal in my country.I just feel so uncomfortable with the word 'smacking' I preferre spanking. Of course, no phyical contact with the main chest, back, and head. Feet are very delecate so I would avoid that as well. so if I ever have to spank my childre (if I have any, that is) it would be on the Bottom, back thighs (lightly of course) and hands (one spank,) Sometimes Time Outs don't work.

You've said a mouthful there. You don't have kids. It's a lot easier to say it from where you stand now, believe me.

I've got to boogie, end of shift, but I'll check back in.
I knew someone would say this. And it's fair.
But it's not like I haven't been in superstore with angry and tired 5 year old twins, or in the playground where these monsters decided to beat their neighbour etc etc of course those are just short moments while parents have to deal with this kind of situations all the time.
But should I, even before those possible future babies are born, decide that I WILL spank/smack them?

I just feel so uncomfortable with the word 'smacking' I preferre spanking. Of course, no phyical contact with the main chest, back, and head. Feet are very delecate so I would avoid that as well. so if I ever have to spank my childre (if I have any, that is) it would be on the Bottom, back thighs (lightly of course) and hands (one spank,) Sometimes Time Outs don't work.
I'm curious when you think it's alright to spank your kid (hypothetical)?
I know parents who spank their daughter when she hits her little brother. So by spanking they try to teach that hitting is wrong?

I'm curious when you think it's alright to spank your kid (hypothetical)?
I know parents who spank their daughter when she hits her little brother. So by spanking they try to teach that hitting is wrong?

No, they are teaching them that "there's always some one bigger than you are so don't pick on people." :rolleyes:

I got smacked when i was younger, usually for fighting for my little brother, i soon learned not to fight him. But my mum only used it in certain situations. other times she would just take my little brother away and ban me from the tv, my books or toys, that was always a worse punishment!

I personally only believe in spanking when the child is doing something that's a danger to themselves; yelling in a supermarket? No spanking. Running out onto the street? Same way I'd treat my dog - sharp "No!" and a swat on the backside.

The main reason is that when they're doing something *dangerous*, it's alright for them to associate it with pain/fear. But for say, eating cookies when you told them no? That's not something that's healthy to associate with pain/fear.

Plus, if you overuse physical punishment it either loses all meaning; the child starts being all repressed and buggered mentally; or you have to hit harder each time to get the message across (which would of course lead to crossing the line between 'punishment' and 'abuse').

Personally I'll be trying to stick to positive and negative reinforcement, not punishment, in most cases.

Lol @ story. Good thread. :D I used to lie down on the back seat looking at the ceiling of the car. It used to have many many dots. I would stare at them so hard, till my eyes cross and I see double of them.

I think when kids are very young, like 1-4 years old, talking to them really makes no sense, especially when telling them NOT to beat their younger sibling or steal their food.

Their not going to understand that putting their hand on the stove is going to burn them.

I believe in spanking, but not with the hand, probably a small rod, plastic ruler. So I think by spanking the childs hand, the child would recognize that touching the stove = pain. Rather than letting the child find that out by themselves.

But as they progress older, when communication is formed. They understand, and thats when we should decrease the physical and more the communication. Telling them whats right and whats wrong.

But I guess it's all up to the child. Some children are nice and well behaved. I know I used to be a hell-raiser, screaming running around the restaurant, running under tables. Climbing on top of tables and pretend i'm a GI-JOE, and playing with my food. I used to get spanked alot when I was younger. And when I was older, yeah, my mom started banning me from lots of stuff. Hey, I grew up fine.

I think by spanking the daughter, It's teaching them that it hurts to beat someone else? So she shouldn't do it?

surely most kids would rather be smacked (as before, quick thwack witht he back of the hand rather than a slippering) than the mindgames that some parents use? I hate it when I see parents making their kids responsible for their happiness or terrified they'll be taken away or whatever. That's got to be worse than smacking

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4019801.stm

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4019801.stm

Interesting link - but No Shit Sherlock! That's the point of Nursery Rhymes - to teach children about bad things and danger in a safe environment so they can learn to deal with it.

Interesting link - but No Shit Sherlock! That's the point of Nursery Rhymes - to teach children about bad things and danger in a safe environment so they can learn to deal with it.

I do recognise that this is not a particularly serious article.

I'm curious when you think it's alright to spank your kid (hypothetical)?
I know parents who spank their daughter when she hits her little brother. So by spanking they try to teach that hitting is wrong?Hypothetically, when the little monster is running amok, being a real brat that my parents... er... the kids parents have to hold on to the child. Then the Volume is turned up to as loud as I... er... the brat can go. then the child is taken home... and the spanking administered... in private. If the child is old enough to understand why, then the explanation before the punnishment is in order. (I was a real brat... but I concidered myself reformed by spanking.)

http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/health/4019801.stm

One of the weird nursery rhymes I used to hum to. Even till today.
(can't remember if it's accurate or not) :p

Bill Grogans Goat, was feeling Fine
Till he ate, the clothes from off the line
Bill Grogan, gave his goat a whack
And tied it to, the railroad Track

One of the weird nursery rhymes I used to hum to. Even till today.
(can't remember if it's accurate or not) :p

Bill Grogans Goat, was feeling Fine
Till he ate, the clothes from off the line
Bill Grogan, gave his goat a whack
And tied it to, the railroad Track

Beauty in verse.

I think when kids are very young, like 1-4 years old, talking to them really makes no sense, especially when telling them NOT to beat their younger sibling or steal their food.

Their not going to understand that putting their hand on the stove is going to burn them.

I believe in spanking, but not with the hand, probably a small rod, plastic ruler. So I think by spanking the childs hand, the child would recognize that touching the stove = pain. Rather than letting the child find that out by themselves.
I disagree. Talking probably won't make any sense but I don't think spanking would make them understand anything either. Except fear. I tried to show that a stove is dangerous by letting a 3 year old touch (very slightly) a hottish tea kettle and telling why it's hot. I don't know if she learnt that stove is hot, but she learnt that things can be hot and if you touch them, it doesn't feel nice. Hot=burns=hurts through experience.


I think by spanking the daughter, It's teaching them that it hurts to beat someone else? So she shouldn't do it?
Again if they can't understand if you try to explain it, why they would understand if you spank them?

.

I think by spanking the daughter, It's teaching them that it hurts to beat someone else? So she shouldn't do it?
I just remembered a boy who can't feel pain, or anything else for the matter. And is a little monster. It is pretty hard to explain to him that hitting hurts other people when he has absolutely no knowledge of pain. And goes without saying, would be pretty useles to spank him.
He may burn himself and notice it only when he smells "something odd"
There's a challenge

btw smacking your kid is illegal in my country.
There was a recent Bill here in the UK to minimise its use. It is still legal as long as it doesn't leave red marks, bruising or mental harm. I agree with that logic in theory, but I have no idea how the government plan to police it. :rolleyes:

Again if they can't understand if you try to explain it, why they would understand if you spank them?
I take your point, but I suppose the rationale is that they associate the (temporary) pain with having done something wrong. Logically speaking, doing that thing again could result once more in that pain, so they're less likely to do it. I know nothing about the psychology of children, or about parenting, but it seems like a reasonable conclusion to come to. Certainly, when I was a kid, I made the associate between the 'pain' and doing something wrong, and therefore didn't do it. I suppose though it depends on the individual parents and child.

I take your point, but I suppose the rationale is that they associate the (temporary) pain with having done something wrong. Logically speaking, doing that thing again could result once more in that pain, so they're less likely to do it. I know nothing about the psychology of children, or about parenting, but it seems like a reasonable conclusion to come to. Certainly, when I was a kid, I made the associate between the 'pain' and doing something wrong, and therefore didn't do it. I suppose though it depends on the individual parents and child.
I believe this is how it works, if it works. But why I would want to cause pain to my child. I would never hit anyone* so why start with own child. I believe that people who think spanking is alright are not so strictly against other kind of violence (a bit strong word) either.
Like people who think death penalty is alright may think that killing people isn't so bad in the first place. (mean they have fewer problems with killing people)

*of course in self defence (and few other quite similar situations) if running away isn't an option anymore

surely most kids would rather be smacked (as before, quick thwack witht he back of the hand rather than a slippering) than the mindgames that some parents use? I hate it when I see parents making their kids responsible for their happiness or terrified they'll be taken away or whatever. That's got to be worse than smacking
This is just pure evil. I know it's common in alcoholist families.

(this has nothing to do with it, just came to my mind) When I was a teenager I envied my friend who could argue and shout with her parents. I wanted to argue and shout but my parents didn't let me. No, we had to sit down around the kitchen table and discuss about things. argh. torture for a teenager. to be reasonable.

Teenagers are different. Where I work, we confront them, we give them writing assignments, we ground them, and we give them time outs. This is a simplified list, but it seems to work alright. We're pretty strict in everything, though, and we tailor it to the kid. For instance, if he doesn't like writing, loathes it, we give him a writing assignment that makes him have to write or think.

If all else fails, there's a safety-hold until he calms down enough that he's not a danger to himself or anyone else.

Maybe it would work on little kids, but it almost seems to me that they view life in simpler terms than even teenagers, and you have to make things very black and white for them to understand it.

I took my seven month old son to the doctor today for his check-up.

WHile the doctor was examining him, he farted. Now I never heard any baby fart quite so loud. I don't think the doctor had either because she pulls her hand back like he just blew battery acid. Now I'm laughing. My son hears me and starts laughing too. SHe looks at me then at him. "He's definitely your son." She says. I just nod and say, "Yep".

Well, when we get out to the car, I'm strapping my son down like a porcelain doll filled with nitroglycerin when it occurred to me that my mother never used to do this for me. I clearly remember one day, I think I was three. I was laying on the back deck. YOu know, the space where the back window ends and the top of the back seat begins? I used to lay there. Well, I don't know what happened, because I was playing with a matchbox car. But for some reson, my mom had to brake suddenly. I fly off, slam into the back of the seats, and drop into the footwell. My mom and sister freak. My mom looks over the top of her seat at me with wide eyes. I stare back at her from the footwell with equally wide eyes. Then I burst into laughter.

But today, we strap our kids down like porcelain dolls filled with nitroglycerin. Which is fine. I'm all for safety. We are considerably more refined now. Quite unlike the primitive barbarism of the 1970s.

But as a firm believer in the Happy Medium, I can't help wondering if we're taking this too far. I want my son to grow up normal and well adjusted. Like me. Not neurotic and cookie-cutter like the latest batches of 'tweens I've been seeing around lately.

I have to find an online version ... but me and a friend were having this discussion ourselfs when another friend went and got a project book his dad had.

The last project
How to turn the back half of your (origional) beatle into a mobile play room :)
it was GREAT all kind of pointy things and plenty of room to fly when breaking :)
Ahhh the good ol 70's

This is just pure evil. I know it's common in alcoholist families.

(this has nothing to do with it, just came to my mind) When I was a teenager I envied my friend who could argue and shout with her parents. I wanted to argue and shout but my parents didn't let me. No, we had to sit down around the kitchen table and discuss about things. argh. torture for a teenager. to be reasonable.That's a psychological bitchslap... my sympathies...

Actually my mom would take me for a ride in the car to talk, rather than at the kitchen. There's no escaping! Unless I'm willing to jump out of the moving car. :D