NationStates Jolt Archive

OKay, now in the past, I have provided instruction on how to cause trouble. I've also shown you how to free yourself from straitjackets.

Today, I'm going to discuss how to remain uncaught. Or if caught, how to not be locked away.

Okay. YOur first priority is to focus on legal and quasi-legal mischief. For instance, mowing your lawn naked. Technically, it's agains the law(except in parts of California). But since it is your own property, a good excuse will often mean the difference. 'I only have one clean set of clothes, and I didn't want to get them dirty' is a good excuse.

Now, if you absolutely have to involve yourself in criminal mischief, remember these two rules: Never repeat your offense. Blame alcohol.

YOu don't have to be drunk. But if you have some liquor in your system, it can often mean the difference. If you urinate on a police dog, alcohol could mean the difference between a court visit and an 'observation period'. Also, never repeat your mischief. If the police find out that you have just urinated on your seventh police dog in four years, you're probably going to be answering some odd questions about your family to a guy in a sweatervest who really doesn't care.

Finally, never endanger yourself or others. Well, more than a little. If you are a definite and immediate risk to yourself and others, they will evaluate you more thoroughly. If they think you're just a harmless wacko, they let you go.

Last but not least, form a 'sane' habit. For instance, insist on brushing your teeth and flossing after every meal and before bed. Insist on it! It creates the illusion of normal neurotic social values.

Enjoy. :D
This post has been removed for advocating troublemaking. An investigation is pending.

--Agent G. Mann
Federal Bureau of Incrimination

[This post show signs of tampering by the NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester.]

*Begins writing notes*

Thanks! :)

Excellent work LG :)

I feel I must share the lessons of my experiences. A new generation of wackos and lunatics is just beginning.

New threats arrise every day. Medication, for instance.

Remember that if your psychiatrist provides you with medication, that you agree enthusiastically to take it. Make it a regular part of your daily schedule of events to 'take your pill'. That way, when you fake it, nobody will suspect. Knowledge is power. Look up your medication. Learn what it's supposed to do so you can fake it when you need to. Learn the side-effects so you can grumble about them.

Then, if you have the occasional 'episode', you can at least lie convincingly and say it must've been a fluke. :)

Could I have links to the other two threads please?

I feel I must share the lessons of my experiences. A new generation of wackos and lunatics is just beginning.

New threats arrise every day. Medication, for instance.

Remember that if your psychiatrist provides you with medication, that you agree enthusiastically to take it. Make it a regular part of your daily schedule of events to 'take your pill'. That way, when you fake it, nobody will suspect. Knowledge is power. Look up your medication. Learn what it's supposed to do so you can fake it when you need to. Learn the side-effects so you can grumble about them.

Then, if you have the occasional 'episode', you can at least lie convincingly and say it must've been a fluke. :)
**SHRUG** breakthrough behaviors happen. ADs are best especially the SSRIs because they can induce mania.

Could I have links to the other two threads please?

How to escape from straitjackets:
http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=348243

still looking for the other one. (Pesky 1 search per 180seconds rule...)

Do you speak from experiance?

Blame alcohol.

OK - have fun ;) but just a word of caution for any Australians - courts here got sick of/ wise to this excuse years ago. These days you're likely to get compulsory drug and alcohol abuse counselling as a part of your sentence.

That said, streaking is almost a part of our national culture. :p

OK - have fun ;) but just a word of caution for any Australians - courts here got sick of/ wise to this excuse years ago. These days you're likely to get compulsory drug and alcohol abuse counselling as a part of your sentence.

That said, streaking is almost a part of our national culture. :p

EGAD! :eek: Compulsory. Hate those words. Right up there with 'Zero Tolerance.'

They're so... inflexible.

Do you speak from experiance?

I'm free, aren't I? :D

Mischief Tips:
http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=364267

**SHRUG** breakthrough behaviors happen. ADs are best especially the SSRIs because they can induce mania.

I have some experience with one called Celexa.

Hated it. Made me sweat like an elk.

Had some odd sexual side-effects too.

"Had some odd sexual side-effects too."

Awww c'mon. You can't just leave that statement..errr... hanging?? :D

Well, okay.

[apologies mods if this goes too far]

It didn't affect the ease of getting and retaining an erection, but it made an orgasm considerably more difficult and take much longer. This is not necessarily a bad thing. But can be frustrating after the first hour or so.

OK LG, if I only had a limited amount of time in which to learn important mischief causing skills, which are those that you would reccomend? Is lockpicking, for the purpose of gaining access to supposedly secure rooms or lockers particularly useful, or would I be better employed experimenting with various quantities and mixtures of household products to discover the best way to reliably get the results I desire? Should I hone my cardsharping skills rather than my practice in climbing onto roofs or vice versa?

"Had some odd sexual side-effects too."

Awww c'mon. You can't just leave that statement..errr... hanging?? :D
Like droopy dawg but uncaring at the same time. I would say they're F*<ked up, but that would be an oxymoron, eh?

Lockpicking is good stuff. Check local laws. It's always good to know when you're breaking them and some places have laws against non-professionals even having the equipment.

I had a secret way for breaking into dorm rooms without lockpicking. They had a unique weakness I was very good at exploiting. But I'm a better mischief-maker for learning lockpicking.

Chemistry is great stuff. My friend Ape has messed me up very badly with his knowledge of chemistry. But sometimes, the simple things are better. a dry ice and alcohol bath for instance is an excellent way of freezing shaving cream cans. Then peel off the metal and throw the frozen chunks of shaving cream into an enemy's car on a warm day. Let the natural expansion of the shaving cream do the rest. :)

I am an avid google explorer and I occasionally take the time to look up new adhesives and lubricants to see what they can do. I'm also on the lookout for more information on past interests. I've heard of a low-viscosity solvent that will break down most artificial fibers in minutes. De-clothing spray anyone? Hehehe. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to narrow down what that solvent might be.

Well, okay.

[apologies mods if this goes too far]

It didn't affect the ease of getting and retaining an erection, but it made an orgasm considerably more difficult and take much longer. This is not necessarily a bad thing. But can be frustrating after the first hour or so.
No one is gonna tell me that there isn't a market for that kind of side effect.

No one is gonna tell me that there isn't a market for that kind of side effect.

pharmacology is not my strong point, but I suspect there is a similarity between Viagra and Celexa.

Chemistry is great stuff. My friend Ape has messed me up very badly with his knowledge of chemistry. But sometimes, the simple things are better. a dry ice and alcohol bath for instance is an excellent way of freezing shaving cream cans. Then peel off the metal and throw the frozen chunks of shaving cream into an enemy's car on a warm day. Let the natural expansion of the shaving cream do the rest. :)
What legitimate excuse can you have for obtaining dry ice (and where can you get it from) and do you have a preferred method for removing the metal can? Also, I'm assuming that by alcohol you're not talking about a bottle of Jack Daniels, right?
I am an avid google explorer and I occasionally take the time to look up new adhesives and lubricants to see what they can do. I'm also on the lookout for more information on past interests. I've heard of a low-viscosity solvent that will break down most artificial fibers in minutes. De-clothing spray anyone? Hehehe. Unfortunately, I haven't been able to narrow down what that solvent might be.
I'm thinking, although covering someone completely in that would be impressive, maybe just coating the seat of a non-upholsered chair would be the most fun.

I'm thinking, although covering someone completely in that would be impressive, maybe just coating the seat of a non-upholsered chair would be the most fun.

that's where I first heard of it. SOmeone was putting it on the seats of busses. It apparently is a very 'dry' feeling liquid, and if undetected, the next time the victim stands up it's a full moon. :)

I've been trying to find out more without much success.

Hey, wow, declothing spray is a googlewhack!
Edit: ah, dammit, declothing isn't a word.

What legitimate excuse can you have for obtaining dry ice (and where can you get it from) and do you have a preferred method for removing the metal can? Also, I'm assuming that by alcohol you're not talking about a bottle of Jack Daniels, right?

Dry ice is readily available from fishing tackle shops and you don't need any excuse whatsoever.

*note* ever put dry ice in a sealed plastic container on a hot day? Big loud bang with no obvious debris - lotsa fun ;) especially watching from a distance. Another one - three quarters fill a plastic bottle with dry ice and throw it into a swimming pool or fountain. You know those wonderful water geysers in hollywood boat chases? - The very thing.....*

Alcohol would best be rubbing alcohol from sports supply shops or chemists (drug stores in the US)

that's where I first heard of it. SOmeone was putting it on the seats of busses. It apparently is a very 'dry' feeling liquid, and if undetected, the next time the victim stands up it's a full moon. :)

I've been trying to find out more without much success.
Randomly... not so impressive, unless you're waiting on the bus. The genius comes when you can get it in an aerosol and "accidentally" spritz someone.

Dry ice is readily available from fishing tackle shops and you don't need any excuse whatsoever.

*note* ever put dry ice in a sealed plastic container on a hot day? Big loud bang with no obvious debris - lotsa fun ;) especially watching from a distance. Another one - three quarters fill a plastic bottle with dry ice and throw it into a swimming pool or fountain. You know those wonderful water geysers in hollywood boat chases? - The very thing.....*

Alcohol would best be rubbing alcohol from sports supply shops or chemists (drug stores in the US)
Excellent, thanks for that.

Randomly... not so impressive, unless you're waiting on the bus. The genius comes when you can get it in an aerosol and "accidentally" spritz someone.

Perhaps when I find out what it is, and it's properties. For instance, if it's flammable. Or dissolves hair too. Things like that I need to know.

Perhaps when I find out what it is, and it's properties. For instance, if it's flammable. Or dissolves hair too. Things like that I need to know.
Well, most importantly, is it only synthetic fibres? Are people wearing cotton safe? Could there be a situation where someone is still left with their underwear, or (most bizzare of all) could you find someone with porus, non-dissolveable clothes but synthetic underwear? Could you actually remove someone elses underpants without taking off their trousers?

Well, most importantly, is it only synthetic fibres? Are people wearing cotton safe? Could there be a situation where someone is still left with their underwear, or (most bizzare of all) could you find someone with porus, non-dissolveable clothes but synthetic underwear? Could you actually remove someone elses underpants without taking off their trousers?

All pertinent questions. *nod*

I'm gonna have to ask some chemistry students about this. Synthetic fibres = hydrocarbons, that's hydrogen and carbon bonded. So you'd need some kind of oxide to make carbon-<something> and water. Carbon has 4 free electrons. That's about as far as my chemistry knowledge goes.

I did find on Google a thing called Schönbein's fluid, which apparently dissolves natural silk.

Also this:
Differences between natural and chemical fibers
Natural fibers come from plants (e.g., cotton and hemp, which consist of cellulose) and animals (e.g., silk, wool, and fur, which consist of proteins). The characteristics of these fibers are:
(1) No uniform shape
(2) Weak resistance against acids and alkalis but strong
resistance against organic chemicals (e.g., acetone and metacresol)

Most chemical fibers are synthetic and come from plastics (e.g., nylon, polyester, and acryl) and recycled fibers from natural fibers by chemical processing (e.g., rayon and copra). The characteristics of these fibers are:
(1) In most cases, uniform shape
(2) Strong resistance against acids and alkalis (synthetic fibers) and against organic chemicals (recycled fibers, except for acetate)

http://www.customs.go.jp/ccl/e_etc/3.htm

This post has been removed for advocating troublemaking. An investigation is pending.

--Agent G. Mann
Federal Bureau of Incrimination

[This post show signs of tampering by the NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester.]
/me tries to whistle while trying to look innocent; the efficacy of either is debatable. :D

--The Jovial States of Cogitation
"Laugh about it for a moment."
NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester

EGAD! :eek: I don't know what is spookier... that I might have been monitored as a 'chaotic influence', or that I might have corrupted a mod. ;)

EGAD! :eek: I don't know what is spookier... that I might have been monitored as a 'chaotic influence', or that I might have corrupted a mod. ;)
Corrupted a Mod? Impossible!

Unless your "April 2004" founding date is incorrect, then I've been the NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester longer than you've been on NationStates. :p

--The Jovial States of Cogitation
"Laugh about it for a moment."
NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester

Corrupted a Mod? Impossible!

Unless your "April 2004" founding date is incorrect, then I've been the NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester longer than you've been on NationStates. :p

--The Jovial States of Cogitation
"Laugh about it for a moment."
NationStates Self-Proclaimed Court Jester

It isn't correct. (look at my population) but I think you're still older than me.

Besides, it's not about who was silly first, it is about who is sillier. :p

Cog did it!! Anarchy! Anarchy!