NationStates Jolt Archive

(I dedicate this to Japaica)


Spam in the place where I live (ham and pork)
Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (oh boy)
Spam in my luchbox at work (it's the best)
Really makes a darn good sandwhich any way you slice it at all

If you're running low, go to the store
Carry some money to help you buy more
The tab is there to open the can
The can is there to hold in the spam

Oh, spam on the table at home (ham and pork)
Think about selection, are there different flavors now (let's eat)
Spam in my office at work (it's the best)
Think about the stuff its made from, wonder if it's mystery of meat

If you need a spoon, keep one around
Carry a thermose to help wash it down
Now, if there's some left, don't just throw it out
Use it for spackle or bathroom grout, now

Spam in my pantry at home (have some more)
Think of expiration, better read the lable (oh boy)
Spam breakfast, dinner, or lunch (it's the best)
Think about how it's been precooked, wonder if I'll just eat it cold

Now, once you start in, you can't put it down
Don't leave it sitting or it'll turn brown
The key is going to open the tin
The tin is there to keep the spam in

Oh, spam (spam)
Ham and pork
Think about nutrition, wonder what's inside it now (oh boy)
Spam (spam)
It's the best
Really makes a darn good sandwhich any way you slice it

Spam in the place where I live (have some more)
Think about addiction, wonder if I'm a junkie now (let's eat)
Spam in the place where I work (you're obsessed)
Think about the way it's processed, wonder if it's some kind of meat

Spam in the back of my car (ham and pork)
Spam any place that you are (ham and pork)
The tab is there to open the can (spam any place that you are) (ham and pork)
The can is there to hold in the spam (spam any place that you are) (ham and pork)

Long live Monty Python!

That's not Monty Python's Spam song, it's Weird Al Yankovic's!

That's not Monty Python's Spam song, it's Weird Al Yankovic's!
Dude - some random kid is obsessed with calling my Weird Al at my school!

ok, for all the Monty Python fans:

Scene: A cafe. One table is occupied by a group of Vikings with horned
helmets on. A man and his wife enter.

Man (Eric Idle): You sit here, dear.
Wife (Graham Chapman in drag): All right.
Man (to Waitress): Morning!
Waitress (Terry Jones, in drag as a bit of a rat-bag): Morning!
Man: Well, what've you got?
Waitress: Well, there's egg and bacon; egg sausage and bacon; egg and spam;
egg bacon and spam; egg bacon sausage and spam; spam bacon sausage
and spam; spam egg spam spam bacon and spam; spam sausage spam spam
bacon spam tomato and spam;
Vikings (starting to chant): Spam spam spam spam...
Waitress: ...spam spam spam egg and spam; spam spam spam spam spam spam baked
beans spam spam spam...
Vikings (singing): Spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam!
Waitress: ...or Lobster Thermidor a Crevette with a mornay sauce served in a
Provencale manner with shallots and aubergines garnished with
truffle pate, brandy and with a fried egg on top and spam.
Wife: Have you got anything without spam?
Waitress: Well, there's spam egg sausage and spam, that's not got much spam in
it.
Wife: I don't want ANY spam!
Man: Why can't she have egg bacon spam and sausage?
Wife: THAT'S got spam in it!
Man: Hasn't got as much spam in it as spam egg sausage and spam, has it?
Vikings: Spam spam spam spam (crescendo through next few lines)
Wife: Could you do the egg bacon spam and sausage without the spam then?
Waitress: Urgghh!
Wife: What do you mean 'Urgghh'? I don't like spam!
Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!)
Waitress: Shut up!
Vikings: Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Waitress: Shut up! (Vikings stop) Bloody Vikings! You can't have egg bacon
spam and sausage without the spam.
Wife (shrieks): I don't like spam!
Man: Sshh, dear, don't cause a fuss. I'll have your spam. I love it.
I'm having spam spam spam spam spam spam spam beaked beans spam spam
spam and spam!
Vikings (singing): Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful spam!
Waitress: Shut up!! Baked beans are off.
Man: Well could I have her spam instead of the baked beans then?
Waitress: You mean spam spam spam spam spam spam... (but it is too late and
the Vikings drown her words)
Vikings (singing elaborately): Spam spam spam spam. Lovely spam! Wonderful
spam! Spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam spa-a-a-a-a-am spam. Lovely spam!
Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Lovely spam! Spam spam
spam spam!

Hahaha

i would like spam, sausage, spam, spam, bacon, spam, tomato, and spam please.
:D

Ahh...Monty Python. Should be on the national curriculum. I mean, some people gave me and my mates weird looks in the pub when we started singing the Philosophers' Song. They'd got even weirder by the time we finished.

Personally, I love the 'Decomposing Composers' song... And, of course.....

"There are Jews in the world, there are Buddhists...
There are Hindus and Mormons, and then...
There are those that follow Mohammed,
But I've never been one of them...."

EVERYBODY, NOW!

Immanuel Kant was a real pissant
Who was very rarely stable,
Heidegger, Heidegger was a boozy begger
Who could think you under the table,
David Hume could out-consume,
Wilhelm Freidrich Hegel.
And Wittgenstein was a beery swine
Who was just as schloshed as Schlegel.
There's nothing Nietzche couldn't teach ya
'Bout the raising of the wrist.
Socrates himself was permanently pissed.
John Stuart Mill, of his own free will
On half a pint of shandy was particularly ill.
Plato, they say could stick it away,
Half a crate of whiskey everyday.
Aristotle, Aristotle was a bugger for the bottle,
Hobbes was fond of his dram,
And René DesCartes was a drunken fart
"I drink, therefore I am."
Yes, Socrates himself is particularly missed,
A lovely little thinker but a bugger when he's pissed.

Personally, I love the 'Decomposing Composers' song... And, of course.....

"There are Jews in the world, there are Buddhists...
There are Hindus and Mormons, and then...
There are those that follow Mohammed,
But I've never been one of them...."

EVERYBODY, NOW!I'm a Roman Catholic, and have been since the day I was born,
And the one thing they say about Catholics,
Is they'll take you as soon as you're warm...

You don't have to be a six-footer,
You don't have to have a great brain,
You don't have to have any clothes on -
You're a Catholic the moment dad came...

because...

I just don't get it

this thread: http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=373131&page=1&pp=15 that I posted the other day was moved to spam and I just don't understand how it was spam, then I post this which is all about spam and even has spam in the title yet it gets to stay in general! have the mods all gone bonkers?!

have the mods all gone bonkers?!
They ate too much spam spam spam spam spam spam...... wonderful spam, glorious spam....

I just don't get it

this thread: http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=373131&page=1&pp=15 that I posted the other day was moved to spam and I just don't understand how it was spam, then I post this which is all about spam and even has spam in the title yet it gets to stay in general! have the mods all gone bonkers?![ahem] considering the Topic... My guess is that they are not bonkers... just prudes. ;)

Ahh...Monty Python. Should be on the national curriculum. I mean, some people gave me and my mates weird looks in the pub when we started singing the Philosophers' Song. They'd got even weirder by the time we finished.

My wife teaches World Lit in highs school. She makes/lets her students watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail pretty much every semester. :)

My wife teaches World Lit in highs school. She makes/lets her students watch Monty Python and the Holy Grail pretty much every semester. :)What? not Meaning of.... no I can see where some scenes are inappropos, Well there's Life of Br... no can't teach anything even remotely religious... well, I guess Holy Grail is the safest thing to show studens. :p

That 0.5-second clip of the longboat in the middle of the spam song - genious, makes the sketch. Funniest thing EVAR.