NationStates Jolt Archive


The New Religion of the World: The MontyPytonism!

Mr Basil Fawlty
07-11-2004, 04:34
The MonthyPytonism was founded in 1975 by the blessed Graham Chapman, Terry Gilliam, Michael Palin, Eric Idle and John Cleese while doing an spiritual retirement in the Castle Aaaagh.

Actually, they didn't thoguht that the experiment was going to go nowhere, as the Spanish Inquisition was looking around, but Cardinal Ximinez of Spain had a silly quarrell with Cardinal Biggles while Cardinal Fang was dealing a very particular and delicate issue with a prostitue. So, no one was available and the blesses ones founded the new religion in a single evening. Later one, those charming and nice Cardinals joined the Church, too, and were commisioned to clean the glasses.

Initially, the religion wasn't quite widespread, but, suddenly, while watching a porno film, a Spanish would-be director called Pedro Almodovar, see the light and, touched by the teachings of the Blessed Champman -who he was not acquited-, began to spread the new religion for Spain. As a consequence of this, the monarchy was replaced by a new system called Chorradismo, a term which cannot be translated and means Bullshitism. Currently, the new Gran Chorra -The Great Silly, so to speak- is Pocholo Martinez Bordiu.

Most of the civilized nations considered this as complete bullshit, until Prince Charles created in England the Church of the Knights of the Elliptical Table, following the doctrine of blessed Chapman, Gilliam, Palin, Idle and Cleese. So, suddenly, while this was happening in the UK, Argentine invaded the Falklands, but no one paid attention to that in London.

Slowly, the new movement began to spread and consolidate all around Europe, but for France. The French tried to develop their own system, as usual, the PytonMonthynoism, led by a funny fellow called Gerard Depardieu, but it was a complete failure.

The 1990s saw the complete triumph of the MonthyPytonism in its two main variants: the British and the Continental -developed by a German called Franz Beckenbauer-, while the Spanish one remained isolated in Spain and became soon quite fosilized. Towards 1995, the movement began to spread in the United States, but it soon broke into several minor Churches:

- The Congregation of the Suckers, led by Bill "Evangelist" Clinton.
- The Real Church of the Blessed American Inquisition, led by George W. "If it doesn't hurt, it doesn't count" Bush
- The Happy Fellas of the Beer and MacDonalds, led by Michael "Greasy" Moore.
- The Church of YouSuck, led by the Blessed Bart Simpson. By now, it's the most popular Church, by far.

This a very skeetchy history of the MonthyPytonism. If thou hast more news or any item to add and help in our spiritual progression, please be free to add whatever thou thinkest is suitable and advisable to read.

Blessed by thy monthypytonistic soul

The Cardinal Kurt "Ecky-ecky-ecky-ecky-pikang-zoop-boing-goodem-zoo-owli-zhiv" Steiner, writting this line in the castle of Aaaaaaaaagh.
Least well known NSer
07-11-2004, 04:43
Well, brother George W. Bush was training with the Holy Hand Grenade, but he had an accident. He was told not to take out the Holy Pin, but he did. Then, he forgot to throw the Holy Hand Grenade faw away. He kept in his hand and well... the rest is history. Explosive history, sure, but history, neverteless.

Let's have a minute of silence to remember our deceased brother.

1 second... 2 seconds...

Let's go, that's enough, methinks. What comes next?

BTW, dear brethen, don't forget something: The swallow may fly south with the sun or the house martin or the plover may seek warmer climes in winter, yet these are not strangers to our land?

Blessed those who laugh, even if they don't know why.
JuNii
07-11-2004, 05:50
The Choir group "Toad the Wet Sproket" wishes to be know that they are currently suing the band of the same name becuse the band released songs and albums. Giving the public the Impression that the Choir group also sings. Spokesman for the band could not be reached.