NationStates Jolt Archive

The Star Trek: The Next Generation Movie Plot Generator (http://www.geocities.com/phineasbg/tngplotter.html)

The website owner's a major Kirk-loving anti-Picard guy, but this part is fun.

Here's one I wrote:

Star Trek:NationStates

Written By:Syskeyia's player

The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see Syskeyia condemned for not appeasing the Reich. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are opening a storefront. During this scene, Picard complains about not dating Siri.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must negotiate peace in Tanah Burung. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data juggles some n00ks.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving gravship wanking! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that Melkor wants to kill the elves, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Q, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Melkor, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Melkor is not REALLY that bad, because this villian is a good RPer, and a mod to boot.

The crew then learns that the Heartland is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'The Godmod Song.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf cannot sing in Celdonian. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, jumps up and down.

A little later, Picard and Crusher re-enact the Moulin Rouge "Elephant Room" scene. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the the jungle. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, the crew goes to the center of the galaxy and meets [violet]. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says '@#$%!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Melkor has a I.G.N.O.R.E. cannon! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'iLock!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Melkor, one of the Enterprise's warp nacelles explodes. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Melkor.

Soon, Riker shoots at Sino's Gen. Liu. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called the Rejected Realms. Almost defeated, Melkor, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his I.G.N.O.R.E. cannon! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Melkor by reading a transcript of a Knootian-SeOCC economic debate. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily Damien Dreadfire saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with not dating Siri. Picard then gives a speech about the reality of postmodernist deconstructionism.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.

THE END

------------------------------------------------------------------------
Congratulations!
You have now written a Next Generation movie
that's just as good as the ones shown at theaters!
Print this movie out and send it to Rick Berman!

This is Fun
Star Trek:Nippletwist

Written By:Unoriginal Hack

The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see an ice cream man singing. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are gangraping troi. During this scene, Picard complains about his ineffectual viagra.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must buy ice cream. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data fellates Worf.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving the Olsen Sisters! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that he was born a woman, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Yasser Arafat, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Gary Coleman, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Gary Coleman is not REALLY that bad, because this villian was in different strokes.

The crew then learns that A small ants nest is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'Im just a girl who cant say no.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf sits on a dildo. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, immolates.

A little later, Data and Troi simiulate a steamy threesome with Tasha Yars corpse. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the Conservatory. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, Spock(now played by Mr.T) eats Troi. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'pantaloons!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Gary Coleman has a vibrating inflatable sheep! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'OMFG ARCHER FINALLY LEPT!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Gary Coleman, rush limbaugh and michael moore enter into a murder suicide pact. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Gary Coleman.

Soon, Riker shoots at Internet Porn. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called Norman. Almost defeated, Gary Coleman, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his vibrating inflatable sheep! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Gary Coleman by rubbing his belly (with sandpaper for several hours). Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily Gary Coleman saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with his ineffectual viagra. Picard then gives a speech about female circumcision.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.

THE END

heres mine


Star Trek:The Tomzillian Front

Written By:Tomzilla

The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see Enterprise entering Tomzillian air space. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are Pacing around the bridge. During this scene, Picard complains about Tomzillian hospitality.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must a strange explosion in Tomzilla. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data gets his microchips scrambled by the explosion.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving the Enterprise being attacked by Tomzillian rebels! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that that the Tomzillian rebels want to overthrow Shogun Tomzilla the First, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Shogun Tomzilla the First, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Mao Zedong, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Mao Zedong is not REALLY that bad, because this villian is actually bad and is trying to trick everyone.

The crew then learns that Tomzilla is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'Long Live the Shogun.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf gets his hand cut off because he stole some items. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, does nothing.

A little later, everyone does the robot. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the Tomzilla City. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, nobody does anything. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'D'OH!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Mao Zedong has a nuclear explosive! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'fight to the last man!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Mao Zedong, the Enterprise attacks the Tomzillian Rebel's compound. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Mao Zedong.

Soon, Riker shoots at the sky. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called the Shogun Nebula. Almost defeated, Mao Zedong, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his nuclear explosive! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Mao Zedong by shooting him with a Maser rifle. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily Tomzillian soldiers saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with Tomzillian hospitality. Picard then gives a speech about the Tomzillian country.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.

THE END


Congratulations!
You have now written a Next Generation movie
that's just as good as the ones shown at theaters!
Print this movie out and send it to Rick Berman!


seems odd

Star Trek:Roffled Waffles

Written By:The Almighty Bannana

The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see A mime getting blasted into small peices by Spock. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are Having a wild sex orgy. During this scene, Picard complains about The rum being gone.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must Stop disco from destroying the universe. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data Cant find his pants.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving Picard getting attacked by ROFL-copters! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that that disco is the only thing that can combat funk effectively, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Ross Perot, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Zingbat, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Zingbat is not REALLY that bad, because this villian Cant find his pants either.

The crew then learns that The serene planet of B-Nasty IV is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'Peanut Butter Jelly.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf Accidently raped Scotty. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, strips.

A little later, Picard Be-boxes the inspector gaget song. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the Butt. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, I like pie. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'Fuckity Fuck Fuck Fuck!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Zingbat has a Disco Beam! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'It must be a clue!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Zingbat, Picard uses a cardboard tube to defeat Nazi Pirates. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Zingbat.

Soon, Riker shoots at Bob Dole. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called Ginava. Almost defeated, Zingbat, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his Disco Beam! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Zingbat by Ripping his face off and stuffing it down his throat. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily Picard? OMG WTF??? saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with The rum being gone. Picard then gives a speech about Ninjas.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.

THE END

Aardvarkness...

The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.
After the credits, we see aardvarks attacking an expendable space station. This confuses the audience to no end.
Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are petting aardvarks in a zoo on Risa. During this scene, Picard complains about aardvarks ransacking the bridge.
There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must investigate the loss of the expendable space stations. Thus, beginning their mission.
When they arrive at this mission, Data makes an android aardvark with inbuilt phasers.
This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving squirrels allied to the aardvarks trying to scratch the paint off the ship! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.
Later on, Picard finally finds out that the aardvarks, along with the squirrels wish to take over the Alpha quadrant Dominion-stylee, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.
As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Vash, though this person doesn't really help anything.
Then, Aard'varrk, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Aard'varrk is not REALLY that bad, because this villian is an aardvark, and they're cute... duh.
The crew then learns that Risa, amazingly enough, is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!
While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'the Ying Tong song.' The audience groans.
A little later, Worf is taken in by the cuteness of the enemy aardvarks. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.
Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, explodes, but it's only a holographic version.
A little later, the crew all get hopelessly drunk on Romulan Ale and turn off artificial gravity, and have fun flying around intoxicated. The audience doesn't laugh, however.
Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the studio corridor. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.
Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.
Soon, the crew stare into space moronically. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...
Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'Botherations!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.
Finally, the crew discovers that Aard'varrk has a sinister clone of the android aardvark with even more phasers! This makes the situation very dangerous!
In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'Aard'varrk never killed anyone!' ...even though this makes no sense.
In their attempts to stop Aard'varrk, the two android aardvarks fight on the deflector dish Robot Wars stylee. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Aard'varrk.
Soon, Riker shoots at himself, responding to the command "Fire at Will!". But this doesn't help anything.
There is a final showdown in a nebula called the Ywnaxioristhil Nebula. Almost defeated, Aard'varrk, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his sinister clone of the android aardvark with even more phasers! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.
Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Aard'varrk by stuffing dry spaghetti up Aard'varrk's long nose up into his brain, killing him. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily the squirrels, having swapped sides Cardassian stylee, save Picard at the last moment.
Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with aardvarks ransacking the bridge. Picard then gives a speech about how Aardvarks are cute enough to become members of the Federation, despite their conflict.
The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.
The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.
THE END


Congratulations!
You have now written a Next Generation movie
that's just as good as the ones shown at theaters!
Print this movie out and send it to Rick Berman!

Fantastic!

Star Trek:vs Godzilla

Written By:Jordaxia

The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see Turnips dancing to the soviet national anthem. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are hiding from Stalin. During this scene, Picard complains about his Piles.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must get the shopping in. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data builds an underground lair.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving Aliens and George Foreman! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that That Godzilla is destroying the federation, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Jesus, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Godzilla, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Godzilla is not REALLY that bad, because this villian is hungry and lonely, because he's the only atomic monster left.

The crew then learns that Omicron Persei 8 is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'Bananaphone.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf got hit by tomatoes and people insulting his honour. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, enjoys a Watercrest sandwich, which is actually a tuna surprise.

A little later, Picard is hunted by Boba Fett. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the sun. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, Spock dies due to immense radiation, despite not being in the film. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'fiddlesticks!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Godzilla has a golf club! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'My arse hurts!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Godzilla, Picard manages to shit out a whole live chicken. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Godzilla.

Soon, Riker shoots at Dick Dastardly. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called The nebula of doom and terror. Almost defeated, Godzilla, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his golf club! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Godzilla by Using the power of physics to justify why Godzilla should just collapse into a pile of goo. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily Dr Zoidberg saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with his Piles. Picard then gives a speech about the genetic superiority of mankind to all aliens and life.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.

THE END

Star Trek:Anarchy

Written By:Letila
The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see workers enduring brutal conditions to build a starship. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are discussing politics. During this scene, Picard complains about not having enough freedom.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must stop an anarchist uprising. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data quotes the Unibomber.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving exploding corncobs! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that that government is evil, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to the Species 8472 who took the shape of Boothby in "In the Flesh", though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, John Brown, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But John Brown is not REALLY that bad, because this villian just wants to eliminate the burden of responsibility.

The crew then learns that the Federation is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'Trigun opening theme.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf gets high. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, tries to make a lightsaber.

A little later, an ensign is caught watching lolicon hentai. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the ocean. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, the Enterprise is self-destructed to stop the fascists. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'f*** authority!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that John Brown has a mind control raygun! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'Workers of the world, unite!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop John Brown, the crew unleashes an army of holographic tentacle monsters and Japanese schools against John Brown. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop John Brown.

Soon, Riker shoots at fascists. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called the Kropotkin's Beard Nebula. Almost defeated, John Brown, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his mind control raygun! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills John Brown by making him watch Reality TV. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily the Species 8472 that resembled Boothby saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with not having enough freedom. Picard then gives a speech about the evils of government.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.


THE END


--------------------------------------------------------------------------------


Congratulations!
You have now written a Next Generation movie
that's just as good as the ones shown at theaters!
Print this movie out and send it to Rick Berman!

Star Trek:muffin invasion

Written By:Alinania
The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see a muffin dancing across the screen. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are eating muffins. During this scene, Picard complains about stomach ache.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must get more muffins. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data starts juggling with a few leftover muffins.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving throwing muffins! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that muffins really do taste great, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to a talking muffin, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, blueberry muffin, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But blueberry muffin is not REALLY that bad, because this villian was not allowed to eat any muffins when he was a kid.

The crew then learns that The world of muffins is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'muffinale.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf gets muffins thrown at him. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, farts.

A little later, data has to run from a crazy talking muffin. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the oven. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, The obsessive pursuit of picard rips off wrath of khan. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'Yummay!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that blueberry muffin has a muffin destroyer! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'Mmmmuffin!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop blueberry muffin, a muffin gets blown up. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop blueberry muffin.

Soon, Riker shoots at a muffin. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called Muffina. Almost defeated, blueberry muffin, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his muffin destroyer! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills blueberry muffin by stuffing muffins down his throat. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily a muffin saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with stomach ache. Picard then gives a speech about baking techniques.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.


THE END

...mmmh, im hungry :)

Data and Worf have an affair.

Wesley hits puberty and has an affair with Troi.

When the Universe is in danger, all for have a bitch-fight.

With Picard and Kirk as referees.

*evil grin*

Star Trek:The Nex Boring Plot

Written By:Natural Choice
The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see A giant breast-shaped Vessel creeping sernely thru space. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are playing hockey in a zero-g rink in Alaska. During this scene, Picard complains about his overwhelming love for Chef Boyardee.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must investigate the origen of the Guiness Draught Black and White "Brilliant!" Guys. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data comes back from the dead as a giant talking thumb/Borg drone.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving The capture of the surviving members of the sentient dodo clan of the South Pacific! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that the Guiness guys are here to enslave our women and sell them to the Flinstones, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Ezri Dax, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Guiness guys, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Guiness guys is not REALLY that bad, because this villian has longed to be colorized by Ted Turner.

The crew then learns that Chongo Prime is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'Surry with a fringe on top.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf realizes that he is actually a woman and loves frilly pink dresses. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, makes cofee.

A little later, Data Farts. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the Santa Monica boardwalk. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, The final frontier. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'Beyaaaaatch!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Guiness guys has a Galaxy vibrator! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'Yipee Kiya, Mother F***er!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Guiness guys, Riker is beheaded in his only scene. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Guiness guys.

Soon, Riker shoots at his own skull. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called political rift. Almost defeated, Guiness guys, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his Galaxy vibrator! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Guiness guys by hiring outsourced Indian telemarketers to overdose them on curry. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily the whales saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with his overwhelming love for Chef Boyardee. Picard then gives a speech about flatulance and it effect on galactic emissions standards.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.


THE END

Star Trek:nazi borg

Written By:data
The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see hitler on a cube. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are cleaning old guns. During this scene, Picard complains about the jews.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must find a gold hat. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data farts.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving a gun dual over the gold hat! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that the nazi borg are good guys, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to tu'vok, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, nazi borg queen, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But nazi borg queen is not REALLY that bad, because this villian is trying to get the jew borg.

The crew then learns that earth is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'i've got a lovley bunch of coccanuts.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf ate a glass. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, strips for the crew (all the way).

A little later, data falls asleap at the helm. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the nazi borg world. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, loss of the 'prise. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'nerds!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that nazi borg queen has a kite flyer! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'sieg heil!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop nazi borg queen, borg battle borg. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop nazi borg queen.

Soon, Riker shoots at picard. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called the bog. Almost defeated, nazi borg queen, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his kite flyer! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills nazi borg queen by shooting him self. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily nazi borg queen saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with the jews. Picard then gives a speech about the last hour of the film.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.

Star Trek:Avengence

Written By:Jecht
The film opens with some credits that make the audience's eyes hurt.

After the credits, we see Sepultura making peoples eyes bleed. This confuses the audience to no end.

Next, we cut to the Enterprise. Throughout the movie, the ship interiors are filmed too dark to see things clearly. On the Enterprise, we see the TNG crew. They are moshing out to some Sepultua, whilst also smashing things up.. During this scene, Picard complains about being bald and stubby.

There is an incoming hail, where Picard is instructed that Picard and the TNG crew must attend boot camp for monkeys. Thus, beginning their mission.

When they arrive at this mission, Data gets some dreadlocks and starts acting like a rasta, whilst smoking ganja.

This scene abruptly switches to a scene involving two naked russian chicks making out, whist the crew it their porridge! This scene could have been very action-packed, but is very short, unfortunately.

Later on, Picard finally finds out that his wig has been taken by a rabid kung-fu loving monkey, and thus the plot of the film finally begins.

As the crew work toward resolving this plot, a member of the TNG crew talks to Mr T, though this person doesn't really help anything.

Then, Zekacourasta, the film's obvious bad guy, is revealed. But Zekacourasta is not REALLY that bad, because this villian is an ass kicking monkey who is lonley.

The crew then learns that The corner shop is in grave danger! They must come to the rescue!

While they are working on this rescue, Data sings 'hit me baby one more time.' The audience groans.

A little later, Worf finds out that his head is shaped like a cornish pasty. This ticks off many Worf fans in the audience.

Later on, Troi, who had nothing else to do in the film, pole dances on the torpedo tubes..

A little later, Wolf acts like a black gangsta, with lots of bling and his cornish pasty tribe. The audience doesn't laugh, however.

Trying to resolve things, Picard and his Away Team beam down to the volcano. Which looks almost cinematic, but not quite.

Crusher and Geordi do absolutely nothing for the duration of the film.

Soon, kirk gets killed again. This seems verrrry familiar to the audience, for some reason...

Then, for no reason, someone in the film says 'fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck fuck!' Nerds in the audience think this is cool and edgy.

Finally, the crew discovers that Zekacourasta has a dildo! This makes the situation very dangerous!

In reaction to this, one of the crewmembers says 'I want my cheesy puffs!' ...even though this makes no sense.

In their attempts to stop Zekacourasta, wolf does some breakdancing and data does a bass tapping solo. This looks really cool... but doesn't stop Zekacourasta.

Soon, Riker shoots at baby Monkeys. But this doesn't help anything.

There is a final showdown in a nebula called the Giant zit rift. Almost defeated, Zekacourasta, in a fit of rage, attempts to activate his dildo! Time is running out, so Picard beams over and attempts to stop him.

Eventually, Picard violently and mercilessly kills Zekacourasta by slapping him viciously with a fish. Picard is almost killed in the process, but luckily his mum saves Picard at the last moment.

Later, Picard contemplates on what has happened. As a result of this mission, Picard has resolved his problems with being bald and stubby. Picard then gives a speech about how to eat pie quicker then anyone.

The TNG crew then beams back to the Enterprise, which warps off into space.

The TNG theme plays on the soundtrack.


THE END
OOC: Made me laugh :D