NationStates Jolt Archive


Missing Iraqi explosives returned

Smeagol-Gollum
29-10-2004, 14:44
Iraqi terrorists promise to hand back stolen explosives “one bomb at a time”

The terrorists who have embarrassed the US Government by stealing 380 tons of high-impact explosive from a weapons dump in Iraq have vowed to return it to US military as soon as possible, in gradual, fissible amounts.

“We’ll even drive it up and deliver it right to the front door of their compound,” an spokesman for the Al Karar Brigade promised.

The US had been warned about the large quantity of weapons at the al-Qayaa site by the international weapons inspectors, but the army failed to secure the location during its push towards Baghdad. “I guess we could have destroyed it or something, but our first priority at the time was bombing hospitals and schools,” a US Army spokesman explained.

US Secretary of Defense Donald Rumsfeld played down the scandal. “It’s not nearly as bad as it could have been,” he said. “Those terrorists could have been armed by Saddam Hussein – our worst fear, which we went to war to prevent. Whereas terrorists being armed through US negligence is nothing new.”

President Bush says he feels vindicated by the theft of the explosives. “We’ve always maintained that Iraq had stockpiles of weapons of mass destruction,” he said. “While we may not have found any, at least now we know someone has.”
Lutton
29-10-2004, 14:46
:D
Katganistan
29-10-2004, 14:50
Amusing parody... I'm curious though -- yours, or from another source?
Smeagol-Gollum
29-10-2004, 14:54
Amusing parody... I'm curious though -- yours, or from another source?

Wish I could claim the credit, but no.

Sourced from Australia's own http://www.chaser.com.au/
Jabbaness
29-10-2004, 14:55
LOL :D

I heard a story somewhere that Arafat was smuggling WMD's into France... :eek:

Yea I know that was bad.. I hope the old guy pulls through..
Lutton
29-10-2004, 14:56
WASHINGTON - The Pentagon on Thursday released an aerial photograph taken two days before the Iraq invasion that showed two trucks at the site where 377 tons of high explosives went missing, but could not say if they had anything to do with the disappearance. (AP)



Er ... just to make it clear ... the above is not - sadly - a parody. :rolleyes:
Katganistan
29-10-2004, 15:02
Wish I could claim the credit, but no.

Sourced from Australia's own http://www.chaser.com.au/

LOL -- cool -- now I know where to look for more. ;)
Smeagol-Gollum
29-10-2004, 15:05
WASHINGTON - The Pentagon on Thursday released an aerial photograph taken two days before the Iraq invasion that showed two trucks at the site where 377 tons of high explosives went missing, but could not say if they had anything to do with the disappearance. (AP)



Er ... just to make it clear ... the above is not - sadly - a parody. :rolleyes:

Latest news on this is :

Looters stormed the weapons site at Al Qaqaa in the days after US troops swept through the area in early April last year on their way to Baghdad, gutting office buildings, carrying off munitions and even dismantling heavy machinery, Iraqi witnesses said.

The Iraqis on Wednesday described an orgy of theft so extensive that enterprising residents rented their trucks to looters. But some looting was clearly indiscriminate, with people grabbing anything they could find and later heaving unwanted items off the trucks.

Two witnesses were Al Qaqaa employees and the third was a former employee who had come back to retrieve his records, to keep them out of US hands.

A mechanic, Ahmed Saleh Mezher, said employees asked the Americans to protect the site but were told this was not the soldiers' responsibility.

The accounts show that looting was triggered by the arrival of US troops, who did not secure the site after persuading the Iraqi forces to abandon it. "'The looting started after the collapse of the regime," said Wathiq al-Dulaimi, a regional security chief, who was based in nearby Latifiya.
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The Russians have angrily denied claims by the deputy undersecretary of defence for international technology security, John Shaw, that Russian special forces had "almost certainly" smuggled the explosives out of Iraq.

The New York Times; Reuters

Looks rather like another FUBAR situation by US troops.
Lutton
29-10-2004, 15:09
FU I get ... BAR?
Smeagol-Gollum
29-10-2004, 15:13
FU I get ... BAR?

Beyond All Recognition
Smeagol-Gollum
29-10-2004, 23:31
maybe time for a little bump
Smeagol-Gollum
30-10-2004, 09:38
1 last bump for those that missed it