NationStates Jolt Archive

With it being election season, I think it is appropriate to discuss the best political comedy ever. My Fellow Americans had James Gardner, Jack Lemmon, and Dan Aykroyd. It is very funny, here are some funny lines from it.

President Kramer: Well President Douglas

President Douglas: President Kramer.

Kramer: Writing a book I see? I've written what, 7 books since leaving the office.

Douglas: You seem to have a good nack for fiction

Kramer: (sneers) How is Mrs. Douglas?

Douglas: We are in the middle of a divorce.

Kramer: Oh! I knew that! I guess life in the white house was too much of a strain on the marraige.

Douglas: No it was life out of the white house Belinda couldn't stand.

Kramer: Oh well your being out of the white house went over so well with the rest of the country!

Douglas (yelling) Well if you want to talk popularity!

Kramer: (yelling and interupting) If you want to talk about popularity, there was only 1 assassination attempt on me, you had three.

Douglas: Two! The woman in Phoenix doesn't count, she only had a starter pistol

(continues in onto funeral scene at Arlington)

Douglas: You're a whore! Admit it you're a filthy whore!

Kramer: Name me three women in the disctrict of Columbia you didn't bang when you were in the office. WHo am I kidding name one!

Douglas: Screw you

Kramer: Blow me (18 guns fire off in salute as he says this line)

(on a Golf Course)

Vice President Matthews hits a poor drive nailing a black man on the head

Matthews: I'd like to apologize. I'm so sorry for hitting you. And I hope it doesn't scare you away from Golf as it is such a great game. It's a sport that your people, the black people aren't so good at. But thats because you can't get into the nice clubs. The restricted ones. So since your people are so good at so many sports it is good that us white folk have a sport your not so good at.

Secret Service Agent: Vice President Matthews come this way.

Matthews: Is there a problem?

Agent; There will be less of one if you come with me Sir.

Reporter, writing everything down: Man I'm getting a cramp.

love that movie

Another classic line:

Douglas pulls string on a Kramer doll:

"Our dreams are like our children" "Don't you fall into the trap, Democrats are full of crap."

Douglas: I feel dirty.

Douglas: Come on Kramer Jump! It's the amber waves of grain. We'll count to 3. 1-2 (pushes Kramer off the train.) Damn that felt good. 1,2,3 (jumps off train)

Kramer: Douglas, Douglas! Where are you Douglas!

DOuglas (sounding hurt): stop yelling

Kramer: Where are you?

Douglas: I'm over here

KRamer: Nice amber waves of grain

Douglas: I think I got a chunk of purple mountain's majesty up my ass.

such a great movie, unfortunately I dont remember quotes off the top of my head. Have to run off and watch it again but all I can say is, Jack Lemmon is the man, he is hilarious

I hope you all have seen Dr. Strangelove.

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