NationStates Jolt Archive

What is your opinion of Internet dating, romance,and love? Do you think it can evolve into a successful real life relationship?

Happened to me. :)

I'd try it, I guess. I've made RL friends over the internet.

Highly unlikely to work out, in my opinion.

But then again, I'm horribly bitter and cynical.

Happened to me. :)

And me. :p

Love grows and develops and is unpredictable; anything can happen in the real world, on the internet, love has no boundaries.

I never even chatted until 3 years ago. I made fun of online relationships and thought they were silly. I ended up eating my words and am now married to my true soulmate, whom I met online. Sometimes, its really nice to be wrong. :fluffle:

I met my fiancee here on NS of all places, and we will be getting married next year. (There a thread in the archives announcing this). As a matter of fact, shes sitting here with me right now.), So I'd say they can work out. The only real differences int an internet relationship, and Real life, is the distances often involved and the trust factor. Me and Joanna have managed to overcome all those problems and are very happy together.

I met my fiancee here on NS of all places, and we will be getting married next year. (There a thread in the archives announcing this). As a matter of fact, shes sitting here with me right now.), So I'd say they can work out. The only real differences int an internet relationship, and Real life, is the distances often involved and the trust factor. Me and Joanna have managed to overcome all those problems and are very happy together.

Congratulations Joanna and Jim! I wish you many many years of happiness!

I once read that over 90% of internet relationships don't survive the first meeting. I think it can be worth the shot, probably, but chances are it's not going to work. I think the reason why is, like it or not, there's more to attraction than written words (which can be easily lies) and the odd picture or voice chat. There's pheremones for example...

I once read that over 90% of internet relationships don't survive the first meeting. I think it can be worth the shot, probably, but chances are it's not going to work. I think the reason why is, like it or not, there's more to attraction than written words (which can be easily lies) and the odd picture or voice chat. There's pheremones for example...

Ours did, so I guess we are A rarity.

Not into it.

I once read that over 90% of internet relationships don't survive the first meeting. I think it can be worth the shot, probably, but chances are it's not going to work. I think the reason why is, like it or not, there's more to attraction than written words (which can be easily lies) and the odd picture or voice chat. There's pheremones for example...

yah,people can say anything online.Personally,I wouldn't count on it.

Ours did, so I guess we are A rarity.

I suppose so

My roommate recently married a man she met online. They seem to be quite happy, and I certainly hope they remain that way.

Well it all depends, I have heard of people being fortunate like Big Jim and his fiance, congrats you guys!
I have also heard of people being taken for everything they had, and guys who start multiple relatinships on line as a way of getting not sex but money!
But then the same stuff happens face to face a lot too so, who knows. just be careful and make sure you know the person before moving any further with it. Same as real life.

Happened to me. :)
Yup......Me Too!! :fluffle:

Two of my friends married women they met over the internet; one couple is happily married, the other couple was until she died of cancer.
Both guys had been internet junkies for quite a while, so maybe the disaster stories can be avoided, so long as you are aware of them...

I don't believe in relationships or dating or love as a general thing, but there are some people online I do really like (and yes, I've met them). If we lived any closer together, I would probably date one of them.

So yeah. I think internet relationships are just as worthwhile as RL ones. Certainly one of my net relationships has lasted much longer than any RL one (10, 11 months versus, oh, 3 at the most). Maybe, though, that's just due to me being a hopeless, anti-social net addict.

What is your opinion of Internet dating, romance,and love? Do you think it can evolve into a successful real life relationship?

I would never meet someone in RL who I met on the internet. You can never tell who someone really is. Just stay clear of the whole internet dating thing. I know sometimes it turns out well, but there are sick people out there and you could be playing right into their hands.

I would never meet someone in RL who I met on the internet. You can never tell who someone really is. Just stay clear of the whole internet dating thing. I know sometimes it turns out well, but there are sick people out there and you could be playing right into their hands.
I'm in love with you, date me please. *stalks Japaica and steals his car and money*

You mean something like that? Haha, I actually think the chances of getting a creepy jackass in RL are just as high.

ive been online for about 8 years and ive seen many internet relationships.

they are no more fraught with danger than real life ones. meaning KEEP YOUR EYES OPEN.

for example, if you have not noticed that a few people on this board are major bullshit artists or out and out psycho liars. you are not a good enough judge of online character to trust yourself to be a good judge of a potential online sweetheart.

just a thought

the biggest thing to watch out for online as well as in real life is those people who are trying to trick you. there arent that many of them but they can devastate you. watch out for those who move too fast into a relationship, those who would want you to meet them secretly or in a non public place. if they dont understand WHY you would want to meet at starbucks instead of their motel room, RUN. every legitimate person online understands that you have to tell your parents. never give anyone money. NEVER. no matter how pitiful they might seem. never.

the more common problem, as i see it, is that we trick ourselves. we have so few standard cues online that our brain has to fill them in. you know how you meet someone in real life and you know almost instantly if you are interested in them. its how they hold themselves, their tone of voice, the way they dress, wear their hair. the way they smell. all the physical cues

these are absent online. but our brains can fill them in for us. suddenly this person becomes the most attractive person on earth. you fall into this "dream of perfect love" that is, at this point, based on nothing. you can build this dream up in your mind until no human could possibly meet your expectations.

i knew a couple online who had progressed to the point where they were talking on the phone every night. they lived on opposite sides of the country so they did not get a chance to meet for 2 years. these were adults, both over 30. after talking on the phone every day for 2 years, they met.

it was over in an hour.

all of the physical things were just wrong for them.

i also know a couple, rather mismatched in age, who have now been married for 7 years. they met, and it worked.

my point is, you can't know its real until you have met in real life. (if you dont want it to be real, thats a whole nother thing) until you have met, its only potential.

and i have met many internet friends in real life and found them to be pretty much the average kind of person i expected them to be. if you meet people in public in groups its no more dangerous than going to the mall by yourself.

What is your opinion of Internet dating, romance,and love? Do you think it can evolve into a successful real life relationship?

It can happen. I had a relationship with a girl I met online. It was probably one of the healthiest relationships I've ever had. Doomed but healthy.

What is your opinion of Internet dating, romance,and love? Do you think it can evolve into a successful real life relationship?
It most certainly can and is unfolding in my situation this way. I happen to have a very strong relationship with someone that's lasted for 7 months now, and I've known her for 11 months. As for the anyone can say anything argument: Sure, anyone can say anything, and anyone can say anything to prove that they are who they say they are via 6 phone calls and can be proven by 11 pictures. As for any arguments that they could have been obtained off of the internet: FOUR of them were sent via mail. Long, frustrating snail mail. But yes, it's certainly headed that way, and after a bit of saving, in a few years, visiting each other will be quite possible. Notably, she's the only internet relationship I've actually had—a valid one, anyway, and not just a normal friendship.

Most women I've dated I've met online, either in chat rooms, forums, or through online dating services. Some of these were long-term relationships, some "hey I'm in town on a business trip..." type deals. I've never once met anyone that outright lied or misrepresented themselves, either through description or photograph.

Really, I don't view Internet dating any different than normal dating. There's just as many creeps and psychos out there (male and female) trolling the bars and bookstores as there are the Internet.

The big problem with Internet dating is really in how you treat it. In my experience and from knowing others who've been through the same, the longer you talk to someone online, and the more you begin to feel like you really know them, the more likely you are to make assumptions about them that may or may not be true. You may not even know you're making those assumptions. But, when you meet, they may not be correct -- and you'll have to deal with the real person, rather than the one you believed to exist.

Oh, and if the word "love" ever once pops up before meeting, only trouble ahead. Either they're lying, or they're nuts. One of the two.

Oh, and if the word "love" ever once pops up before meeting, only trouble ahead. Either they're lying, or they're nuts. One of the two.
My girlfriend and I have already decided that we're both crazy, and it's a favourite quote of hers, that "We're all crazy in our own little ways—some of us more than others."