NationStates Jolt Archive

"The best argument against democracy is a five-minute conversation with the average voter."
--Winston Churchill

"Western democracy must be a wretched system if it could exchange a great man like Churchill with Attlee."
--Joseph Stalin

"I trust God speaks through me. Without that, I couldn't do my job."
--President DubYa Bush

"We are all proud that through God's powerful aid, we have become once more true Germans"
--Adolf Hitler

"When I do good, I feel good. When I do bad, I feel bad. That's my religion."
--Abraham Lincoln

Only in a perfect world will pure communism and capitalism work. The again, if the world were perfect..who would need either?

"If you can do a half-assed job of anything, you're a one-eyed man in a kingdom of the blind."

-- Kurt Vonnegut

"We are all proud that through God's powerful aid, we have become once more true Germans"
--Adolf Hitler


Pedantic sidenote:

Hitler only became a 'false' German in 1932, and as such he could never 'once more' become a 'true' German, never having been one before (unless we accept that 'once more than never' is what he meant)....

Hey, you have a problem with the quote take it up with the H man. I could easily arrange a meeting if you like (hint, hint)

"The higher that the monkey can climb, the more he shows his tail."

Tom Waits

Oh, come on! It's always worth the candle!

A famous one, I'm sure it's been heard...

"The death of one man is a tragedy...the death of millions is a statistic" - Joseph Stalin


"If I knew what the fate of the atomic bomb was, I would've become a clockmaker." - Albert Einstein, editted by the loose memory of Colodia

Just because I'm not interested doesn't mean I don't care.
Homer Simpson

The quote I live by is:

"Growing up is inevitable,
Maturing is optional."
-Me

"It's up to God to forgive Bin Laden. It's up to us to arrange the meeting"-U.S. Marines.

"The box said use Windows 98 or better, so I used Linux." -- unknown

"There are two major products that come out of Berkeley: LSD and UNIX" -- unknown

"Up, Up and Away" -Superman

"Eagles may soar, but weasles don't get sucked into jet engines." - Unknown

"I am your father!" - Darth Vader

"The Force will be with you, always." - Obi-Wan Kenobi

"But I was gonna go into Tosche station to pick up some power converters!" - A very winny and annoying Luke Skywalker

"Luke, I am your mother." - Thumb Wars

All you need is love - The Beatles

Illegitimi non Carborundum - "Don't let the bastards wear you down" - Anonymous Roman

"Glory is fleeting but obscurity is forever." -Napoleon Bonaparte

NEVER UNDERESTIMATE THE POWER OF STUPID PEOPLE IN LARGE NUMBERS!!!!!!! -T-shirt I once saw

"I am a bomb technician. If you see me running try to keep up." A T-shirt in the movie "The Sum of All Fears". Also, on a T-shirt I saw a bomb-technician wearing.

"That is possibly the most horrifying thing I have ever seen, or will see, in my entire life." Me, in response to seeing my gym class do the dance to the Michael Jackson music video THRILLER in a small, mirrored room.

The box said use Windows 98 or better, so I used Linux

:D

I'm a Windows man myself by force, but thats hilarious!

"But there's always a lot of rich, old gay guys at those things looking for younger gay guys to take care of. You know, the way Dick Cheney takes care of George Bush." Sean Hayes from Will and Grace

"Elementary my dear Watson." - Never once said by Sherlock Holmes

"It's fun to stay at the Y-M-C-A" - The Village People

"I would not live forever, because we should not live forever, because if we were supposed to live forever, then we would live forever, but we cannot live forever, which is why I would not live forever."

--Miss Alabama in the 1994 Miss USA contest

"Let it be" - The Beatles

"Because I said so!" - Every parent that ever lived

"It's been 32 years. They attacked us the last time. They nearly wiped us out. Now they're back, and they're wondering what happened to their scouting wing." - Back cover of the FreeSpace 2 box

"A^2 + B^2 = C^2 " - Pythagorean Theorem

"Better to wrong the world than have it wrong me!" -Cao Cao, Three Kingdoms

"Education is expensive, but ignorance is more so."

"the quickiest way to end a war is to lose it"

-George Orwell

"Give me liberty or give me death!" - Patrick Henry

"There is no emotion; there is peace. There is no ignorance; there is knowledge. There is no passion; there is serenity. There is no death; there is the Force." - The Jedi Code

"I think we're simply awaking a terrible beast" - Either a real Japanese pilot or an actor before the Pearl Harbor attack

Never pet a burning dog.
-Tip of the Day: Warcraft 2

"I think we're simply awaking a terrible beast" - Either a real Japanese pilot or an actor before the Pearl Harbor attack


That was a paraphrase of Japanese Admiral Miyomoto's musings on the failure of the strike on Pearl Harbor. The attack was considered a failure because the primary targets were the American aircraft carriers, which, by chance happened to be at sea at the moment. If the Japanese had succeeded in taking out the aircraft carriers, the US very well could have lost that war, actually it would have been a great miracle if they did win without the aircraft carriers.

Never pet a burning dog.
-Tip of the Day: Warcraft 2


On the thought of petting; "Don't sweat petty things and don't pet sweaty things." -Wayne Alred (I think)

'What literature can and should do is change the people who teach the people who don't read the books.'- AS Byatt

'Waiting for the German verb is surely the ultimate thrill.' Flann O' Brien

'When you do Shakespeare they think you must be intelligent because they think you understand what you're saying.' Helen Mirren

That was a paraphrase of Japanese Admiral Miyomoto's musings on the failure of the strike on Pearl Harbor. The attack was considered a failure because the primary targets were the American aircraft carriers, which, by chance happened to be at sea at the moment. If the Japanese had succeeded in taking out the aircraft carriers, the US very well could have lost that war, actually it would have been a great miracle if they did win without the aircraft carriers.
:) Ahh, thank you.

"Shoot you coward, you're about to kill a man"

-Ernesto 'Che' Guevara

"Only two things are infinite: the universe and human stupidity. And I'm not so sure about the universe."

-Albert Einstein

"When the government fears the people you have liberty. When the people fear the government you have tyranny."

-Thomas Jefferson

"Government is not reason, it is not eloquence, it is force; like fire, a troublesome servant and a fearful master. Never for a moment should it be left to irresponsible action."

-George Washington

Generic random quotes from the top of my head, unsourced as to the originators:

"Christmas is over lady."

"No, I am not OK I am far from OK. But I am no worse than I was before you hit me."

"All God's critters got hemoglobin."

Happiness lies in being privileged to work hard for long hours in doing whatever you think is worth doing. One man may find happiness in supporting a wife and children. And another may find it in robbing banks. Still another may labor mightily for years in pursuing pure research with no discernible results. Note the individual and subjective nature of each case. No two are alike and there is no reason to expect them to be. Each man or woman must find for himself or herself that occupation in which hard work and long hours make him or her happy. Contrariwise, if you are looking for shorter hours and longer vacations and early retirement, you are in the wrong job. Perhaps you need to take up bank robbing. Or geeking in a sideshow. Or even politics.
-Jubal Harshaw in To Sail Beyond the Sunset

Shared pain is lessened; shared joy, increased.
-One of the Callahan books

Women are like Voltron. The more you can hook up, the better it gets.
-Tucker, RvB

Human subtelty will never devise an invention more beautiful, more simple or more direct than does Nature, because in her inventions, nothing is lacking and nothing is superfluous.
-Leonardo da Vinci

In politics stupidity is not a handicap.
-Napoleon Bonaparte

A society that gets rid of all its troublemakers goes downhill.
-Robert A. Heinlein

An expert is a person who has made all the mistakes that can be made in a very narrow field.
-Neils Bohr

The state has no business in the bedrooms of the nation.
-Pierre Elliott Trudeau

Sometimes communication must be made more dangerous and irritating than necessary.
-Rev. Ivan Stang, Church of the Subgenius

True wisdom is less presuming than folly. The wise man doubteth often, and changeth his mind; the fool is obstinate, and doubteth not; he knoweth all things but his own ignorance.
-Akhnaton, Egyptian pharaoh (18th dynasty)

Diplomacy is the merely one country fucking another over.

One of the hallmarks of a sucessful compromise is that everyone walks away felling that they got the short end of the stick. One of the hallmarks of a good politician is that everyone walks away from a compromise feeling they got the best of the deal. This may be the same compromise as in the first example.

"All I have in this world is my balls and my word and I don't break 'em for no one." --Tony Montana

"The only thing in this world that gives orders is balls.... balls." ---Tony Montana.

"It requires wisdom to understand wisdom; the music is nothing if the audience is deaf." -Walter Lippmann

"Be very slow to believe that you are wiser than all others; it is a fatal but common error. Where one has been saved by a true estimation of another's weakness, thousands have been destroyed by false appreciation of their own strength." -Charles C. Colton

"More than any time in history mankind faces a crossroads. One path leads to despair and utter hopelessness, the other to total extinction. Let us pray that we have the wisdom to choose correctly." -Woody Allen

"We should be careful to get out of an experience only the wisdom that is in it--and stop there; lest we be like the cat that sits down on a hot stove lid. She will never sit on a hot stove lid again--and that is well; but also she will never sit down on a cold one anymore." -Mark Twain

"The fact that your voice is amplified to the degree where it reaches from one end of the country to the other does not confer upon you greater wisdom or understanding than you possessed when your voice reached only from one end of the bar to the other." -Edward R Murrow, 1965

"I have always observed that to succeed in the world one should seem a fool, but be wise." -Baron de Montesquieu

"Even a fool knows you can't touch the stars, but it doesn't stop a wise man from trying." -Harry Anderson

"It is a truly wise man who does not play leap frog with a unicorn" -some guy.

"I do nothing that a man of unlimited funds, superb physical endurance and maximum scientific knowledge could not do." -Batman

"There's nothing more frightening than ignorance in action"

"We must view with profound respect the infinite capacity of the human mind to resist the inroads of useful knowledge." -Thomas B. Lounsbury

"I really don't care if there's a nuclear war as long as I can still get some French Fries." -George Carlin

"My ultimate goal is for people to look back on my life and be amazed that I never did drugs." -Me.

"sex is the reason god invented bathtubs"

"a woman needs a man like a fish needs a bicycle"

"when two people argue about religeon the're both wrong"

=^^=
.../\...

A man who knows how to read but doesn't, is no better off then the man who can't read.- Let's ascribe this quote to Abraham Lincoln

An officer at the Battle of Waterloo...
- "Hmph, they couldn't hit an Elephant at that dis-" during that sentence he was indeed hit by the enemy.

Mohammad Ali (spelling?)...
Shortly before, he had made statements proclaiming that he was "superman", acting as a showman as usual. Onboard a plane, he was approached by a Flight Attendent...

Flight Attendent - "Sir, you'll have to do up your seatbelt"
Ali - "Hey, Superman Don't Need No Seatbelt!"
Flight Attendent - "Yeah, well Superman Don't Need No Plane"

Joseph Stalin (he always has the best quotes)
- "One death is a tragedy, A Million Deaths is a Statistic"
- "Death Solves all Problems; No Man, No Problem

And the one quote that defines the political goings on in the United States...

"The people who cast the votes decide nothing, the people who count the votes decide everything" - Joseph Stalin

Only in a perfect world will pure communism and capitalism work. The again, if the world were perfect..who would need either?
I can't decide if this is wrong or just meaningless.

Don't strain yourself over it. I didn't.

"The most profound realization that you can have when you're on drugs is that you're on drugs."

- Fat Steve

""Well, if you don't appreciate it I could just kill you right now."

"No you can't, I'm already dead, bitch! I guess the jokes on you!"

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"I don't know what the technical military term is for it, but we need men!"

"Dude......how long have you guys been down there?"

"No, no, not like that. We need more men to help us."

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"Simmons, I need your overies!"

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"I could blow up the whole God damned world with this tank."

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"I'm not moist in any of the usual places."

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"Where is the patient?"

"Oh, well she is about fifty feet behind you, and six feet straight down"

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"I have a bad feeling in my Gut about this, but then again, my Gut is made up of super advanced polymers, and it doesn't know what the hell its talking about, Stupid gut."

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"You killed Church you team killing fucktard!"

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"Why do you keep shooting the jeep?"

"Because it's locked on!"

"Well, unlock it!"

"The last time I unlocked it, I killed Church!"

"Oh, right..........keep shooting the jeep."

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"What about you Caboose? Are you following any of this?"

"I think so. That guy Tex is really a robot, and you're his boyfriend. So that makes you.......a gay robot."

"That's right Caboose. I'm a gay robot."

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"There's no way I'm going through the teleporter again. I've still got this tingle in the back of my............look dude I'm just not going back through the teleporter."

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All from Red Vs. Blue, the most fantabulous Web Series out there!