NationStates Jolt Archive


The Holy Grail

The Blue Knight
10-09-2004, 13:03
Greetings members of the various Nationstates,

I'm known as The Blue Knight although that is not my real name. You see I dishonoured myself some time ago and now I'm on a quest to redeem myself and save my King and his enlightened Kingdom from a dark age.

Many years ago a squire named Arthur pulled a great sword, called Excalibur, from the Stone of Destiny. Only a King could perform such a feat and so this squire became King.

When invaders threatened our Kingdom he formed an army of Knights against them. His courage and cunning lead to ultimate . To commemorate this great triumph he had a round table made. At this table sat all of his Knights who became known as the Knights of the Round Table. About the Table he built a Hall and about the Hall he built a great castle called Camelot. We swore an oath to always protect the weak and to up hold our Honour and serve in the cause of Justice. Peace reigned and the Kingdom became strong as the King himself was strong. The people never went without and never suffered.

However King Arthur suffered a great betrayal and has fallen ill. As the land was strong and fertile when he was strong, the land has now become barren as he has become ill. The Land and the King are One, and now the people suffer as Arthur suffers.

To save Arthur and ultimately the entire Kingdom I seek out the Holy Grail, the Cup of God. Should King Arthur drink from this divine vessel his health will be restored and so too will the Land be restored.

My quest has carried me here, to the Nationstates forum. I have but a small tent and with your generosity I hope to set up camp while I try to discover the location of the Grail.
Hakartopia
10-09-2004, 13:07
Ni!
Refused Party Program
10-09-2004, 13:08
Ni!
Gran Breton
10-09-2004, 13:09
Bravely bold Sir Robin rode forth from Camelot.
He was not afraid to die, O brave Sir Robin!
He was not at all afraid to be killed in nasty ways,
Brave, brave, brave, brave Sir Robin!
He was not in the least bit scared to be mashed into a pulp,
Or to have his eyes gouged out, and his elbows broken;
To have his kneecaps split, and his body burned away;
And his limbs all hacked and mangled, brave Sir Robin!

His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
And his pen--
Ankhesensekhmet
10-09-2004, 13:09
Bdi!
Pterodonia
10-09-2004, 13:25
His head smashed in and his heart cut out
And his liver removed and his bowels unplugged
And his nostrils raped and his bottom burned off
And his pen--

That's...uh...enough music for now lads!
Pudding Pies
10-09-2004, 13:28
Meh, I don't live in that kingdom. Too much mansehx.
Pterodonia
10-09-2004, 13:28
To save Arthur and ultimately the entire Kingdom I seek out the Holy Grail, the Cup of God. Should King Arthur drink from this divine vessel his health will be restored and so too will the Land be restored.

My quest has carried me here, to the Nationstates forum. I have but a small tent and with your generosity I hope to set up camp while I try to discover the location of the Grail.

Are those coconuts?
Bodies Without Organs
10-09-2004, 13:55
My quest has carried me here, to the Nationstates forum. I have but a small tent and with your generosity I hope to set up camp while I try to discover the location of the Grail.

You do know that you have to be a virgin to find the Holy Grail?*






* Not that I'm implying anything by these comments.
Bodies Without Organs
10-09-2004, 14:01
I'm not sure if this will work or not, but:


http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/search.php?searchid=74525


(Search This Forum - "Holy Grail")
Chess Squares
10-09-2004, 14:10
Are those coconuts?
lmfao
Big Jim P
10-09-2004, 18:03
I have the secret of the Grail, and am thus Immortal. The Cup is merely a vessel for the secret. Blue Knight, you wish to posses the Grail? For your King ? I posess the Grail and will not relinqueish it.
Ferkus
10-09-2004, 18:42
We demand....a Shrubbery!!!!
Camdean
10-09-2004, 18:47
*DONG*

Bring out your dead

*DONG*

Bring out your dead

" Hes not dead "
Lunatic Goofballs
10-09-2004, 19:01
I could be the odd one and take this seriously...

...or I could go along with the crowd and be silly.

Who am I to deny my silliness? :D

"There's only one pnealty for setting off the Grail-shaped beacon. You must tie her to a bed...and spank her! After that, you can do with her as you will. Then spank me."
Ristar
10-09-2004, 19:04
And who personely wet himself at the battle of Bogard Hill
Bodies Without Organs
10-09-2004, 19:27
I posess the Grail and will not relinqueish it.

That makes you the impotent Fisher King, doesn't it?
Legless Pirates
10-09-2004, 19:34
What is the capital of Assiria?

Well what do we do now?
We wait till night and then we'll jump out of the rabbit and---
What?
We'll jump out of the rabbit and... ooh

And what else do we burn, besides witches?
MORE WITCHES!!!

She turned me into a newt
....
I got better

(I could go on and on)

Serious: The Holy Grail is not a cup. It is a woman named Maria Magdalena, mother of Jesus' child. Church obscured this fact.
Von Witzleben
10-09-2004, 19:35
I have the grail. I'm willing to sell it to you Blue Knight. For the right price.
Lunatic Goofballs
10-09-2004, 19:41
I got my Holy Grail on E-bay.
L-rouge
10-09-2004, 19:41
I don't think he'll be interested, you see we all ready get one!

*I told him we already got one *sniggers**
Von Witzleben
10-09-2004, 19:42
I got my Holy Grail on E-bay.
No. You've got a fake. I've got the real one. I even have a certificate of authenticy(sp) from a company in Taiwan.
Edited for the realy smart people.
Legless Pirates
10-09-2004, 19:43
I'm gonna get one for my next birthday
Tyranid
10-09-2004, 19:48
You actually believe it's authentic. It was made in tiawan for crying out loud! :sniper:
Von Witzleben
10-09-2004, 19:49
You actually believe it's authentic. It was made in tiawan for crying out loud! :sniper:
Of course it's authentic. It says so on my certificate. It cost me 14.95.
Legless Pirates
10-09-2004, 19:50
You actually believe it's authentic. It was made in tiawan for crying out loud! :sniper:
Von Witzleben: you forgot [/sarcasm] There are people in here who think this is a serious forum
Lunatic Goofballs
10-09-2004, 19:51
There could be more than one. It would be a good marketing decision by Jesus. ANdd if 'The Passion of The Christ" is any indication, he probably bled enough to fill several cups. *nod*
Von Witzleben
10-09-2004, 19:52
Von Witzleben: you forgot [/sarcasm] There are people in here who think this is a serious forum
Thanks. Problem fixed.
Sir Peter the sage
10-09-2004, 19:52
Your mother was a hamster, and your father smelled of elderberries!

Look, you silly bastard you've got no arms left!

Yes I have, tis a flesh wound!
Sir Peter the sage
10-09-2004, 19:56
Seriously though, if anyone here hasnt' seen Monty Python and the holy grail then get your ass to a video rental store and see this movie.
Lunatic Goofballs
10-09-2004, 20:00
Seriously though, if anyone here hasnt' seen Monty Python and the holy grail then get your ass to a video rental store and see this movie.

The best way to see Monty Python and The Holy Grail is while mildly intoxicated. So don't forget the booze. :)

P.S. By no means am I encouraging people under the age of 21 to drink alcohol. But then again, when did they need MY encouragement? :D
Big Jim P
10-09-2004, 20:03
I still have the grail. *full on evil grin*
Ferkus
10-09-2004, 22:25
Yes but i have the entire holy cutlery set, The Holy Grail, The sacred plates, and the spoon of Babylon.
Von Witzleben
10-09-2004, 22:28
I've got JC's inflatebal Maria Magdalene. It is said she was "blessed" by JC and all of his diciples. Several times. In one night.
Aust
10-09-2004, 22:42
All you have to do to get the grail is to go, alone into the cave
guarded by that little bunny, go do it, it's just a ickle bunny. I'll go with you, after all it's just a tiny little *AAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR RRRRRRRRRRRGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGGH*
Then the animator had a sudden heart attack and so I survived but.... Oh! I'm having a cardiac arrest* However swollows dropped coconuts on me and thus I survived.
The Blue Knight
11-09-2004, 12:08
Thank you for your replies.

They range from the satanic to the banal to the humorous and even the kinky. I see Nationstates is a broad church. However I fear I'm no closer to ending my quest...
Bozzy
11-09-2004, 13:38
STOP!

He who would cross the Bridge of Death

Must answer me

These questions three

Ere the other side he see.

:)
Z-unit
11-09-2004, 13:51
We demand....a Shrubbery!!!!
ni :D
Aust
12-09-2004, 17:23
Thank you for your replies.

They range from the satanic to the banal to the humorous and even the kinky. I see Nationstates is a broad church. However I fear I'm no closer to ending my quest...
*smiless* Just follow Indiana Jones, he finds it....
Dakini
12-09-2004, 17:24
You do know that you have to be a virgin to find the Holy Grail?*






* Not that I'm implying anything by these comments.

but indiana jones found it... and he had girls all over him.
Superpower07
12-09-2004, 17:26
The Holy Grail is Mary Magdelene! She is the holy cup who carries the blood of Christ.

The Bible says she was a whore, but that is a lie! the Gospels of Philipp point the truth out, I say. . .

Her bones and the Grail documents are doth hidden in the Louvre!
Dakini
12-09-2004, 17:27
P.S. By no means am I encouraging people under the age of 21 to drink alcohol. But then again, when did they need MY encouragement? :D

hey, those between 19 and 21 can come over here to visit... go canada and lower drinking ages.

they should be dropping it down to 18 soon enough, as they got rid of the 5th year of highschool...