NationStates Jolt Archive

I'd have to go with Jesus. He'd lay the Holy Smackdown on that lizard.

Perhaps.. or would use the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch. After counting to 5, NO 3! of course

Jesus, definitely. It wouldn't be difficult for a simple human army to bring Godzilla down.

godzilla was killed by mortals

jesus was killed by mortals

in theory i could kill both of them

I'd have to go with Jesus. He'd lay the Holy Smackdown on that lizard.

Godzilla! Jesus! No, wait, Godzilla. Without a doubt Godzilla.

godzilla sucks but godzilla doesn´t suck as much as jesus does

Perhaps.. or would use the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch. After counting to 5, NO 3! of course

and the lord did smile in thy enemies blown into tiny bits

and the people did feast upon the lemmings and the sloths and anchovies and breakfast cereals

but i'll tell ye if you answer me these questions 3


3, NOT 5

Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins.

and the lord did smile in thy enemies blown into tiny bits

and the people did feast upon the lemmings and the sloths and anchovies and breakfast cereals

but i'll tell ye if you answer me these questions 3

God bless Monty Python...

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)
2. He wouldn't need to physically fight anyone. The universe would simply comply with his wish that they be destroyed
3. This question is totally pointless, but I answered it anyway

so I picked the last option.

I think you're missing the obvious, people. Jesus had a beard! The beard of Ultimate Power...and he dressed like a ninja. That's supreme-osity right there.

I should have added a fourth option:

"Jesus Christ you're a fucking idiot, Godzilla!"

godzilla would step on him and that would be the end of it.

You're crazy! A giant foot is no match for the prophet of God. :D

godzilla would step on him and that would be the end of it.
He could unexpectedly come back 3 days later though

Lol..Now here is the question. Which godzilla is it? :confused:
And does Jesus have a gun with green bullets? :gundge:

I pick hippo. I think a hippo can take on either one of them.

You're crazy! A giant foot is no match for the prophet of God. :D

But a few Romans with hammers and nails were.

No they weren't. By that time Jesus had Scotty beam him back up to the 'ship.

I beleive he let them crucify him. ( if anyone asks me why I'll scream)

Why...

John 3:16

bill 79

Godzilla would most definitly win. If a few nails can kill jesus, then a million ton, fire breathing lizard can easily stomp/incinerate the holy man. I also think the person who posted Jesus vs Godzilla is an idiot.

damn you mr genitals nation

well of couse godzilla COULD kill Jesus, ( when he was human) but would he let him? I seriously doubt it.

Jesus wins. I direct interested parties to the huge amount of research at Pagga.net (http://www.pagga.net/cgi-bin/vBulletin_v3/index.php?):fluffle:

Look everyone. I think the answer here is obvious. Godzilla's name has God in in. Godzilla. God is more powerful than jesus. So obviously godzilla is really god in disguize and could definately kick jesus's ass any day.

Jesus vs. Godzilla.

In the middle of Tokyo, a lone man stands amist the fleeing multitudes, his white robe fluttering in the breeze. Detemination on his face, as he stares down the 500 ton lizard stomping his way. He rubs at his beard thoughtfully, as a few Japanese men bump into him, quickly muttering apologies before resuming their screaming.

"Halt," The man commands the lizard to little affect.

"GRAAAAAAAAAAAAAAR" SCreams the lizard, spewing forth radioactive breath at the white robed man.

"My Father created you, and I am here to end you" The man says, as he strikes a power pose. "The Power of Christ compels you, Bi-atch!"

The mighty lizard moves as if to stomp the man, only to find his foot halted in mid air. In a rage, the lizard makes a tail swipe, destroying 13 sushi restaurants, and a dance club playing techno music.

The man grins, as he tosses the lizard aside, destroying the Nintendo offices. Godzilla rises slowly from the rubble, and breathes his radioactive breath at Jesus, once more not even phasing him. As Jesus prepared to call down God's wraith on the terrible lizard, Mothra flew in and killed them both.

So in conclussion, Mothra wins!

Godzilla would kill him. Cause Jesus would just turn the other cheek till theres no more cheek left to turn.

I beleive he let them crucify him. ( if anyone asks me why I'll scream)
Christian right wing propaganda.

Even the winds and the waves Him(by Him i mean Jesus) so if the winds and the waves obey Jesus,why shouldnt the giant fictional lizard?

Orrrrrrrr, a gigantic gerbil would bust them both up :)

You use the word proganda like it's always a bad thing.

Main Entry: pro·pa·gan·da
Pronunciation: "prä-p&-'gan-d&, "prO-
Function: noun
Etymology: New Latin, from Congregatio de propaganda fide Congregation for propagating the faith, organization established by Pope Gregory XV died 1623
1 capitalized : a congregation of the Roman curia having jurisdiction over missionary territories and related institutions
2 : the spreading of ideas, information, or rumor for the purpose of helping or injuring an institution, a cause, or a person

Orrrrrrrr, a gigantic gerbil would bust them both up :)

It would be...dunh dunh dunh....Hampstergeddeon

Initially Godzilla would just step on jesus, crush him alive and win, game over Jesus is dead. However he'll come back from the dead, Godzilla will come back out the sea kill him again, then J would come back agian etc etc, this will continue for roughly 150 years, until Godzilla eventually dies of old age, and thus Jesus wins in the end.

Dude, they wouldn't even fight, Jesus would just conjure up some wine for Godzilla, and they'd chill out and party and get with tha funk and such.


And Godzilla isn't actually his name, it's Gojira, but in the translation to english they just say Godzilla.

Well Godzilla would win anyways.....Jesus doesn't exist :)

I stick behind my assertion that Mothra would emerge victorious..... Mothra Rules!

This is very simple. Godzilla would come to toyko from monster isle, looking for jesus, then King Kong smells Godzilla and then he comes to Toyko, they get in a fight and Jesus gets out a camcorder and makes millions in the hit blockbuster: "Jesus Presents: The super knockdown moster action movie!"
Jesus was always a capitalist, I mean did Bhudda or Muhummad ever have a job? Nope. But Jesus the Capitalist did.

Jesus was always a capitalist, I mean did Bhudda or Muhummad ever have a job? Nope. But Jesus the Capitalist did.
Yes because Carpenter is up there with the Microsoft corporation

Yeah it was...in the 30s

Jesus!

All the way!

Nobody can beat Jesus, especially not a giant actor in a rubber suit.

JC would own Godzilla.

Which Godzilla? If it is the American Godzilla from 1998 then Jesus will win. The Japanese Godzilla would send Jesus back to heaven.

Godzilla! No problem! Jesus couldn't even defeat a few Roman soldiers, never mind a giant radioactive dinosaur!

Godzilla! No problem! Jesus couldn't even defeat a few Roman soldiers, never mind a giant radioactive dinosaur!

Um actually, he let them capture him. He could have called down an entire army of angles if he had wanted to.

And THAT'S how he'll beat Godzilla!

Jesus was always a capitalist, I mean did Bhudda or Muhummad ever have a job? Nope. But Jesus the Capitalist did.

Actually... Muhummad was a merchant...

As for the poll... I pick GODzilla (I dont know how too do bold :P )

no it'll become a political race with godzilla on one side and jesus on the other and it would be who would u vote for godzilla or jesus i pick godzilla cuz i like the color green

When was Godzilla ever actually killed by humans? Never. I am not talking abou the stupid American movie...Godzilla was usually slightly bothered by puny human military flies, and then another monster would come. Unless Jesus has a megazord, or returns after death as Monster Zero, Godzilla has quite the advantage.

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)


Buddha existed, he was a teacher living about 300 years before Jesus in India. Historical records from his lifetime confirms his existence, whereas Jesus's existence is confirmed only by later sources.

i think i would win with my nerf gun

Some people say that Jesus could just return after three days. So:

1.Godzilla heals any damage taken
2. Godzilla destroys humanity
3. Godzilla just kills Jesus again. CRUNCH.

There. And if God intervenes, He's cheating. This is man to man, mortal to mortal, until one cannot return.

Jesus would just bring an army of Zombies...Then Godzilla would lose...Otherwise the world stands no chance at the 'Bad End' of my 'Shagahod'
((If you have no idea where the Zombie-Jesus connection came from, you've never seen the Madness Combat series...As for the Shagahod, it's from MGS3, but I have no idea as to what it is.))

Some people say that Jesus could just return after three days. So:

1.Godzilla heals any damage taken
2. Godzilla destroys humanity
3. Godzilla just kills Jesus again. CRUNCH.

There. And if God intervenes, He's cheating. This is man to man, mortal to mortal, until one cannot return.
i guess u could say jesus has frieds in high places lol or that hes higher on the food chain

I know Godzilla could win, but if Jesus weren't here to fight him for us (hehe), what would we do?

Since when did Jesus show any fighting prowess? He was a prophet, not Rambo. While he may be the son of god, he would be utterly annihilated.

I have been thinking...what do we have to combat Godzilla, the all-destroyer?

1. Nukes? NO...they created him...
2. No lazers yet...
3. We can't control the other monsters
4. Humans are puny, weak, and stupid
5. Godzilla thinks tanks and airplanes are small tasty animals
6. No lazers still...

Nukes WOULD work... you would just need a surface blast and even then he would have too be inside the fireball.

Jesus kicks everyone's ass.

:sniper:

U ALL SUCK! Trogdor the Burninator would beat both humans and radioactive lizards alike!


Trogdaaarrr!!!!
Burninating the countryside!
Trogdaaarrr!!!
Burninating all the pesants!...

Nukes WOULD work...


Godzilla was created by nukes.

Jesus would go Biblical on his ass.

I think neither would win, they'd both end up in a stalemate in which they cause more damage to their surroundings than to each other, meaning they will eventually destroy the entire world.

Jesus was killed by a stick and some nails, I don't think Godzilla would have a problem beating him.

Jesus would just get all of his fundie followers to attack Godzilla

godzilla could destroy any pussy church goers.

Jesus would go Biblical on his ass.
What do you mean with Biblical? Allow Godzilla to nail him to the cross like the Romans did?

Jesus promoted loveand non violence, except to those who arent christian.
so if godzilla was a christian then Jesus couldnt kill him... Otherwise he would bore him to death by reading him the bible

Jesus promoted loveand non violence, except to those who arent christian.
so if godzilla was a christian then Jesus couldnt kill him... Otherwise he would bore him to death by reading him the bible
:D Damn. Why didn't I think of this response? :D

What do you mean with Biblical? Allow Godzilla to nail him to the cross like the Romans did?

It wasn't intended to make sense. :p I just thought it had a nice sound to it. ;)

Which venue?

Tokyo? Godzirra hands down.

New York? Toss up. But I would think both would find better things to do.

It wasn't intended to make sense. :p I just thought it had a nice sound to it. ;)
It does. :D

Hahahaha

Christian right wing propaganda.


If you're a Muslim, you believe that Jesus wasn't crucified at all and that he was ascended to heaven by God before the intended crucifixion. It is also believed that they killed someone with a resemblence to Jesus either the work of God again or because time was running out and they couldn't find the crafty bugger.

Even Mothra would beat Jesus, as would Ghidorah, Rodan, Ebirah and the vast majority of the other monsters, so I don't think the big G (and I don't mean God) would have to break into too much of a sweat to pulverise Jesus. Only Minya might a problem going one on one with the man in sandals.

Pffft. Jesus wouldn't even have to take his sweaty stinky sandals off afterwards.

Who's Minya?

Jesus was killed by a stick and some nails, I don't think Godzilla would have a problem beating him.

bollocks.
If you beleive the bible, Jesus died and then rose again - thus death is not a problem for the christ.
If you don't beleive the bible, then historians would tell you that he did indeed exist - and thus the evidence indicates he escaped crucifiction.

Thus, I say Jesus the son of god would just let Godzilla destroy the earth and save all our souls when we die toasty radioative deaths.
Jesus the crafty cult leader on the other hand would come up with a sneaky plan, and then get vapourised anyway.

the third option of course is if Jesus :mad: Gets Biblical :mad: - i.e. old testament Fire, brimstone and pillars of salt...
oh wait, Jesus was the New Testament... perhaps he will forgive Godzilla for killing us all?

Jim would win, by stomping the loser.

Jim

Perhaps.. or would use the Holy Handgrenade of Antioch. After counting to 5, NO 3! of course
One, two, five!
Three sir!
Three!
*lob*
BOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOM

man this is so stupid i cant believe i answered that question.
the answer is obvious

Jesus wud get Dad aka god to kill godzilla
if we argue a technicality godzilla was created possibly on the fifth day wid d udder animals

i don't care who wins, but whoever does has to fight bill gates next

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla).

There is more historical evidence that Buddha existed than there is that Jesus existed. Sorry.

As for the poll question, Gozilla is a much more entertaining mythos, so I have to go with him.

Umm you're a freaking idiot...an imaginary creature or an invisible man no one has proof existed...sounds pretty close to me

nahh you see godzilla would eat him
then when he gets reborn he would digest him again and again and again.

but poor old godzilla would have a definatley Un-Holy stomach ache.

ps. jesus is just a puppet JUBUS WILL RULE SUPREME!! :mad: :mad:



now if that ain't original i don't know what is :)

Godzilla would kick the big J's arse, what' the little man gonna do, cure his lower back pain for him? Godzilla take a big Jesus sized chunk outta the world, Godzilla wins. All people worship Godzilla, Godzilla is king, civilisation advances in leaps and bounds because of a messiah that's actually there.

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)
2. He wouldn't need to physically fight anyone. The universe would simply comply with his wish that they be destroyed
3. This question is totally pointless, but I answered it anyway

so I picked the last option.

But didn't Jesus make a whip and attack the money changers that were in the temple, casting them out of his father's house?

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)
...

Actually, Jesus is more of a legend than Buddha.

There was a Gotauma Buddha, and there was [probably] a Jesus of Nazareth.

Incidentally, the mythology around both is very much the same, though the former (Jesus) took from more local mythologies/folk legends, and not from the latter (Buddha)...though his (despite being 500 years older or so) weren't original either.

what's happening here... what is this monstrous mis-representation of the mighty godzilla... i mean for christ sake, the american film was a bag of unspeakables. in the original godzilla film, he was virtually a force of nature like a twister, volcano or earthquake. you can't stop any of these things, you just get to clear up afterwards
(i've finished sweeping up but i still can't find jesus's arm, you'll have to bury him without it)

Well, "you're a fucking idiot" seems to be winning... hehe...

Maybe that's because I am a fucking idiot. :D

if we argue a technicality godzilla was created possibly on the fifth day wid d udder animals

Godzilla doesn't have udders :-) . And Godzilla would win because Jesus is a pacifist. Of course, he could come back, but Godzilla would just kill him again, like Bambi.

After much deliberation and thinking upon the subject I have decided to change my stance. Jesus would cure Godzilla's radiation poisoning thus changing him back into an iguana. Whilst not a complete victory for Jesus it goes to show what happens when you defy the church.

I vote for Godzilla! :D

You guys don't understand. Jesus Christ resurrected as a part of the New Creation. He could do alot more things in his new body than what his old body couldn't. His new body is pretty much immortal. If he can defy the law of gravity, what other natural laws can he defy? Before he ascended into heaven he could go through walls manipulating matter at will. He could also eat, so he wasn't a ghost. He was part of another reality all together. That's why the disciples didn't notice Him at first.

Godzilla doesn't have udders :-) . And Godzilla would win because Jesus is a pacifist. Of course, he could come back, but Godzilla would just kill him again, like Bambi.

But what if Godzilla had fought God first!? (Fights Bambi)
And THEN he fights Jesus? (Fights son of Bambi)

Round 1: Godzilla Wins
Round 2: Jesus and Godzilla Lose

It's been a long time since I saw that, so forgive me if I remember it wrong.

You guys don't understand. Jesus Christ resurrected as a part of the New Creation. He could do alot more things in his new body than what his old body couldn't. His new body is pretty much immortal. If he can defy the law of gravity, what other natural laws can he defy? Before he ascended into heaven he could go through walls manipulating matter at will. He could also eat, so he wasn't a ghost. He was part of another reality all together. That's why the disciples didn't notice Him at first.

but that's not his style.

Gojira was a guy in a suit.

Jesus was/is a myth.

Gojira wins by default.

*bump*

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)
2. He wouldn't need to physically fight anyone. The universe would simply comply with his wish that they be destroyed
3. This question is totally pointless, but I answered it anyway

so I picked the last option.

I'm sorry but did you say that Buddha didn't exist? He was just a man like jesus. As a buddhist I find that kind of offensive. Anyway Godzilla would definitely win. Trust me I have basically every Godzilla film ever made.

I thought this was whether Jesus or Godzilla would win not a theological debate.

Luke 24:25 And he said unto them, O foolish men, and slow of heart to believe in all that the prophets have spoken!
26 Behooved it not the Christ to suffer these things, and to enter into his glory?
27 And beginning from Moses and from all the prophets, he interpreted to them in all the scriptures the things concerning himself.
28 And they drew nigh unto the village, whither they were going: and he made as though he would go further.
29 And they constrained him, saying, Abide with us; for it is toward evening, and the day is now far spent. And he went in to abide with them.
30 And it came to pass, when he had sat down with them to meat, he took the bread and blessed; and breaking it he gave to them.
31 And their eyes were opened, and they knew him; and he vanished out of their sight.


Luke 24:36 And as they spake these things, he himself stood in the midst of them, and saith unto them, Peace be unto you.
37 But they were terrified and affrighted, and supposed that they beheld a spirit.
38 And he said unto them, Why are ye troubled? and wherefore do questionings arise in your heart?
39 See my hands and my feet, that it is I myself: handle me, and see; for a spirit hath not flesh and bones, as ye behold me having.
40 And when he had said this, he showed them his hands and his feet.
41 And while they still disbelieved for joy, and wondered, he said unto them, Have ye here anything to eat?
42 And they gave him a piece of a broiled fish .
43 And he took it, and ate before them.

Luke 24:50 And he led them out until they were over against Bethany: and he lifted up his hands, and blessed them.
51 And it came to pass, while he blessed them, he parted from them, and was carried up into heaven.
52 And they worshipped him, and returned to Jerusalem with great joy:
53 and were continually in the temple, blessing God.

So did I.

bump

"And Godzilla spake unto Mothra, who, being not in Godzilla's sight, did harken.
"Graaaaaaaaa!"
And thus did Godzilla unleash his potent atomic breath, and Mothra, who had hidden from his come uppance, and he did snuffeth."
-Godzilla 3:16.

I'm a fucking idiot is still ahead!

Well... let's just look at the tape, shall we?

http://www.plif.com/archive/wc097.gif

Looks pretty cut-and-dried from here. :)

Go Jesus!!

Maybe they are one in the same?

GODzilla. Jesus son of GOD, or GOD (depending who you ask)

Maybe godzilla is jesus re-incarnate? Notice how he never kills christians/muslims/jews? (working under the assumption most japanese are shinto buddists).

Jesus = immortal
godzilla = immortal
Jesus = funky powers
godzilla = funky powers
Jesus = dies and comes back
godzilla = dies and comes back

Jesus Christ! I can't believe most guys think godzilla will win, for the sole reason that I opened my post with "Jesus Christ!" and not "Godzilla!"

Jesus Christ! I can't believe most guys think godzilla will win, for the sole reason that I opened my post with "Jesus Christ!" and not "Godzilla!"

maybe your the wrong faith?

maybe your the wrong faith?
Is there a church of Godzilla? No! Why not? I don't know, they're both a bunch of lies.

Is there a church of Godzilla? No! Why not? I don't know, they're both a bunch of lies.

well it took christians a while to get there own church. not sure how long, but think it was a century or 2

Give Godzilla a chance!
Just imagine seeing a church/temple that instead of a dude on a gross there and lizard stomping buildings!

well it took christians a while to get there own church. not sure how long, but think it was a century or 2

Give Godzilla a chance!
Just imagine seeing a church/temple that instead of a dude on a gross there and lizard stomping buildings!
but who would go there?

but who would go there?

guess it would depend on the message.
Godzilla became what he became because of the atom, and the harnessing a nature. Could actually be quite an interesting faith.
Could you imagine the threats from the priest?
Christians = do what we say or you'll go to HELL!!! We know it exists so you'd better worry!!!!

Zillians (not sure what they'd call themselves) = do what we say or GODZILLA will nuke you city!!! Just look at tokyo and New York!!!

guess it would depend on the message.
Godzilla became what he became because of the atom, and the harnessing a nature. Could actually be quite an interesting faith.
Could you imagine the threats from the priest?
Christians = do what we say or you'll go to HELL!!! We know it exists so you'd better worry!!!!

Zillians (not sure what they'd call themselves) = do what we say or GODZILLA will nuke you city!!! Just look at tokyo and New York!!!
the question now is: would he nuke you if you would not go?

the question now is: would he nuke you if you would not go?

Nah.
don't see him being that self-centred. As long as we don't fuck-up the planet or piss him off, I think he'd be cool.

oh shit! just remembered, did godzilla not have a kid??
THE SON OF GOD.
shit this is a faith in the making!!!!

and think about it?
the faith would be high! no persky book to read, all on video and DVD!

WOW... do you think in 2000 years there is a NS 4000 forum where people discuss being an pro's and cons of atheism and agnosticism and Zillianism?

WOW... do you think in 2000 years there is a NS 4000 forum where people discuss being an pro's and cons of atheism and agnosticism and Zillianism?

maybe
Zillians throwing bits of text from the film, or a clip showing godzilla stomping tokyo. "see he did exist!", and "see there is radiation in japan and we all know that radiation is the will of GODZILLA!"

Atheists "No he did'nt! that just propaganda perpertrated by the up-wing tele-mothman politicians who want us to believe in this!!!"

Agnostics "both of you make good points!"

maybe
Zillians throwing bits of text from the film, or a clip showing godzilla stomping tokyo. "see he did exist!", and "see there is radiation in japan and we all know that radiation is the will of GODZILLA!"

Atheists "No he did'nt! that just propaganda perpertrated by the up-wing tele-mothman politicians who want us to believe in this!!!"

Agnostics "both of you make good points!"
Zillians:"Notice how there are earthquakes in the sea. There is no earth in the sea! It's Gozilla!"
Atheist:"How can you belive in something you never saw!"
Agnost:"Very good points both"

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)

well, while we're talking logistics, Jesus is dead, so in fact he'd have a hell of a time fighting anybody, or doing anything else that living people do for that matter.

2. He wouldn't need to physically fight anyone. The universe would simply comply with his wish that they be destroyed

Jesus - when he was alive - never wished destruction upon anybody; that was much of the point of his having been born in the first place. most christians, however, having decided that destruction is the prerogative of the holier-than-thou, decided also that what Jesus said during his lifetime was exactly the opposite of what he actually meant, and that the essence of righteousness is in fact to hate and to kill. so the most likely outcome is that Jesus and Godzilla would have just effected a truce and be sitting down to tea together when a posse of christians would come riding up and kill them both.

:headbang:

Atheists: how do you explain the different messages!!! You guys can't even agree on Godzilla. Just look at the orthodox zillians of Tokyo! They see HIM as god of destruction and protection, and HE has a son!!!
While you reformist Zillians based in Hollywood see Him as a god of destruction that was persecuted by the leaders of New York!!!

Zillians: both messages are true, just interpretation! and anyway the New Yorker will suffer when they die in HOLY RADIOACTIVE FIRE for their sins!!!

Agnostics: well i think you have to have faith, i think its the message that counts not the words! i mean as long as you live a good life, does it matter whether you beleive or not?

"Has Jesus ever fought Buddha? No, Godzilla wins."

1. Jesus Dosen't need to fight things that don't exist ( Buddha and Godzilla)
2. He wouldn't need to physically fight anyone. The universe would simply comply with his wish that they be destroyed
3. This question is totally pointless, but I answered it anyway

so I picked the last option.

1. It's a fictional character Vs a fictional character thing... (what makes you so sure of christ yet deny buddha?)
2. I don't recal jesus being able to do much besides a little healing and a few party tricks
3. Your answers are totally stupid.... but I answered them anyway... :cool:

*Waits for the horde of christians to attack him* :headbang:

It isn't just Christians who believe that Jesus was a prophet of God, you know.

1. It's a fictional character Vs a fictional character thing... (what makes you so sure of christ yet deny buddha?)
2. I don't recal jesus being able to do much besides a little healing and a few party tricks
3. Your answers are totally stupid.... but I answered them anyway... :cool:

*Waits for the horde of christians to attack him* :headbang:

HOW DARE YOU!!!! I'VE SEEN GODZILLA ON TV!!!! HE DOES EXIST!

HOW DARE YOU!!!! I'VE SEEN GODZILLA ON TV!!!! HE DOES EXIST!

LOL

YEAH!!! YOU TELL HIM!!!

Stalemate. Jesus would do absolutely nothing to defend himself, Godzilla would incinerate him by accident, but three days later Jesus would be back from the dead. Ad infinitum.

Unless Godzilla is mortal. Then Jesus wins by default. Except Godzilla also seems to regularly return from the dead, so stalemate.

Is there a church of Godzilla? No! Why not? I don't know, they're both a bunch of lies.

No, that would be Marxism.

Stalemate. Jesus would do absolutely nothing to defend himself, Godzilla would incinerate him by accident, but three days later Jesus would be back from the dead. Ad infinitum.

Unless Godzilla is mortal. Then Jesus wins by default. Except Godzilla also seems to regularly return from the dead, so stalemate.

that's actually of interest. As i understand it, jesus was crucified, they buried him, and then he rose from the grave 3 days later. same body and all.

If Gozilla barbecued him and made him ash, or eat him, and crapped him out, would he come back 3 days later as a human or ash/crap.

Just some notes (I'm a Godzilla man, I should get that out of the way).

Godzilla doesn't eat his opponents, not his style.

Militaries have a horrible track record against Godzilla. The only success they've had they used a space ship.

Godzilla has only lost to space ship/perry mason (at least to american audiences, modern films not included-it's not Godzilla unless its Toho.) and King Kong. While Kong and Jesus are both primates, I don't think that's enough.

Godzilla has come 'back from the dead' @16 times. Its a push.

If Jesus is allowed to use a zombie army, then Godzilla should be allowed to us his posse. King Gihdra would handle that with his random ass breath thing.

Zillians intrigue me, as I've always thought there would be people who would worship Godzilla thinking he was for a simpler life (which is why he keeps knocking out powerplants.) If they lived a life without power Godzilla would leave them alone.

Jesus would waste the first rounds turning cheeks. Godzilla would have to set up a souvineer shop in one of Jesus' temples to get the party started.

I agree that Jesus' ill-defined 'miracle' power would make the fight full of suprises. But Godzilla's got that Hulk Hogan thing goin' for him-just when you think he's licked, he comes back swinging (In Terror of MechaGodzilla the monsters where literally dancing on his grave and he came back.)

I wish I had more. I wish what I had was funnier....

yay a convert!!

Would anyone else like to join the Zillian faith?

Godzilla would win in Round 5. I mean come on, when in the bible have you seen Jesus with either uber-rock awesome breath and fire powers, and like godzilla just looks a lot meaner. Jesus would put up a good fight though, of course.

Jesus Christ Vs. Godzilla? Hmmm...Let's see...Godzilla can do the Saftey Dance, Defy all laws of physics, and most important of all NO MATTER WHAT, GOD...Always wins...ZILLA. *oh no there goes Tokyo, gogo Godzilla* :eek:

now if your singing the fu manchu version of that song then w00p!


With a purposeful grimace and a terrible sound
He pulls the spitting high tension wires down
Helpless people on a subway train
Scream bug-eyed as he looks in on them
He picks up a camero and he throws it back down
As he wades through the buildings toward the center of town

Oh no, they say he's got to go go go Godzilla
Oh no, there goes Tokyo go go Godzilla

History shows again and again
How nature points out the folly of men

wow looks like you killed the thread

This thread has died many times, but returns every 3 days.

First off, Godzilla isnt a Lizard, hes a Dinosaur. Second, his real name is Gojira, meaning Whale Ape. Thirdly, Which Godzilla is this? If its the 98 one, well, hes not realy Godzilla. If its the one from GMK, Goji just might win, concidering he is controled/powered by the souls from WW2.

Wi nøt trei a høliday in Sweden this yer?
See the løveli lakes
The wonderful telephøne system
And mani interesting furry animals
Including the majestic møøse
A Møøse once bit my sister ...
No realli! She was Karving her initials on the møøse with the sharpened end of an interspace tøøthbrush given her by Svenge - her brother-in-law - an Oslo dentist and star of many Norwegian møvies: "The Høt Hands of an Oslo Dentist", "Fillings of Passion", "The Huge Mølars of Horst Nordfink".

*takes a drag*

There was no conspiracy behind Godzilla. Or Jesus for that matter.

godzilla
jesus would not want to harm him kinda like a ghandi move

could jesus heat a burrito so hot that even he couldn't eat it?

Looks like "you're a fucking idiot" is winning :p :D ;)

Looks like "you're a fucking idiot" is winning :p :D ;)

Nope, I just voted, Godilla is tyied at first now :D

Well, the most recent Godzilla movie was a critical and commerical bomb.

The most recent Jesus movie was just a critical bomb, but made loads of cash.

But the Godzilla movie was more fun to watch, and I could laugh without getting my ass kicked.


I picked Godzilla.

You are a bunch of fucking idiots. I can't believe the mods didn't lock the thread.

You are a bunch of fucking idiots. I can't believe the mods didn't lock the thread.

Good to see another freedom of speech supporter on these boards.

I assume you voted for option 3 then?

There is much debate Jesus existed.
I have seen Godzilla.
He may have been a 6" plushie, but I've seen him.

I have yet to see Jesus.

I picked Godzilla, but if 'Jesus Christ, you're a fucking idiot, Godzilla!' had been an option, I'd have gone with it.

I think you're missing the obvious, people. Jesus had a beard! The beard of Ultimate Power...and he dressed like a ninja. That's supreme-osity right there.

Jesus is far too not a nip to be a ninja. Example: beard. The Japanese cannot grow full-on facial hair. I've tried. It don't work

I think Godzilla would win. While it only took a spear and a beating to kill Jesus it took shitload of rockets and bullets and other weird mutant creatures to NOT kill Godzilla.

some people are missing the big picture. Godzilla is a radioactive dinosaur able tromp on skyscrapers and remodel tokyo as he sees fit. jesus on the other hand was mainly a crowd pleaser that only had a few token gags such as water to wine and the "i put mud in your eyes and give you sight" and the disappearing rolex trick. Jesus doesn't posess the powers to destroy a dinosaur such as godzilla. one on one godzila would win, unless you give jesus some time to scrape up an organized fan club willing to give their lives for the name of his father and Jesus Christ. They could call themselves the Christers, or Christinites, or Christaganders, or Christians or something.

Jesus: You are dead.
Godzilla: *keels over and dies*

Short fight.

no would win becourse they arent real (or atleast jesus)

Take the facts that we know about both of these people

jesus - a carpenter, so he musta been at least average in strength, and he walked a lot, so he was in good shape.

guy in the godzilla suit - a nerdy fellow who probably spent half of highschool with his head in a toilet.

jesus wins.

This is really quite simple.
He's a fucking idiot. i didn't even have to think about my answer.
And Jesus can't stay dead, so eventually he would find a way to kill Godzilla, or Godzilla would give up in despair and kill himself after realizing that he could not kill Jesus.

Aren't you people paying attention??? :rolleyes:

http://www.plif.com/archive/wc097.gif

Jesus R0XxoRz!!! :D

Ah, PLIF...like a nastier version of The Far Side...love it! It's a shame they had to call it quits a couple of years back...

Jesus: You are dead.
Godzilla: *keels over and dies*

Short fight.

Jesus has "Power Word: Kill"?

Ooh! I am Jesus. Pick me.

(Rawr. Silly lizard.)

Unless Godzilla is really God. My dad. Whatever. Fuck em both.

This is the single greatest thread this forum has ever produced.

Bravo.

There is much debate Jesus existed.
I have seen Godzilla.
He may have been a 6" plushie, but I've seen him.

I have yet to see Jesus.

There's a zillion nativity scenes and other Jesus stuff around, but I haven't seen a stuffed 'Zilla since the shitty 1998 movie came out. Jesus wins. But I am using Mozilla...

This is the single greatest thread this forum has ever produced.

Bravo.


Aaaah, such high praise!!! :D

Jesus is the incarnation of God!
You know, the Allmighty? The Lord? Ring any bells?

Godzilla is a pimp.

This thread has died many times, but returns every 3 days.

would you like to convert to Zilliaism?

Assuming Jesus could beat Godzilla in a fight, does that therefore mean he could beat King Kong as well?

I'd say so. King Kong is just a giant monkey (i.e. American :D ).

I'd say so. King Kong is just a giant monkey (i.e. American :D ).

SPECIEST!!!!!!!!!!
its offence to generalise!!! he is an ape! bit on the big side, but an APE not a monkey.

comments like that could be considered flaming!!!!!

FINE.

He was a giant ape.

i.e. American.

:D

Jesus Christ has Kung Fu Grip©™.

Jesus Curses the Fig Tree (Mark 11:12-14)
On the following day, when they came from Bethany, he was hungry. Seeing in the distance a fig tree in leaf, he went to see whether perhaps he would find anything on it. When he came to it, he found nothing but leaves, for it was not the season for figs. He said to it, "May no one ever eat fruit from you again." And his disciples heard it.

The Lesson from the Withered Fig Tree (Mark 11:20-21)
In the morning as they passed by, they saw the fig tree withered away to its roots.Then Peter remembered and said to him, "Rabbi, look! The fig tree that you cursed has withered."

It seems he does have Power Word: Kill then ;).

The powers of Jesus pale in comparison to that of Godzilla...Unless Jesus used his powers to get Godzilla uber drunk so that it would die of alcohol poisoning. Now how to get Godzilla thirsty enough?

. . .

It seems he does have Power Word: Kill then ;).

He used to use it a lot more in the latter Apocrypha, such as the Books of Infancy I and II.

Damn, it looks like "You're a fucking idiot" is always just one vote ahead...

GODZILLA PEOPLE!!!

That guy has firebreath...Jesus just turns water into booze (although that IS a power worthy of the Xmen!)

Damn, it looks like "You're a fucking idiot" is always just one vote ahead...

GODZILLA PEOPLE!!!

That guy has firebreath...Jesus just turns water into booze (although that IS a power worthy of the Xmen!)

Firebreath??? Jesus has MANY righteous pow3rz!!! Why, even a lesser prophet like Daniel can stand around in a furnace for a few hours AND keep his posse from getting singed!!! And Jesus went to Hell for THREE DAYS!!! You think Godzilla can hurt him with fire breath???!!!oneone111!!!!!!!!!

*This Just in:

In a surprise press conference, Jesus Christ and Godzilla have announced an alliance to bring back the burning times. Jesus was quoted as saying "that wiht this unholy monsters help, The New Burning Times will be handled in a far more efficient manner."

A large group of Neo-Nazis, of the Hitler2004 organization, have expressed their support of this move, and have petitioned Christ for the use of Godzillas talents, when available, as well as asking for Hitlers ressurection.

Of course there was some protest by various pagan, and jewish groups to which Jesus gave his famous "bite me" speech.*

just in.

Huge parades being held by neo-nazies. Hitler has been resurrected!!!!
Unfortunately during a press conference, Hitler went into one of his rants and said he was the second coming of christ.
Christ taking offence to this comment asked Godzilla to go and have a word with the neo-nazies.
Unfortunately, godzilla, not being known for his oratory skills simply resorted to turning all the neo-nazies at the march, along with hitler, into radiactive dust.

In a later press conference Godzilla said he deserved a holiday and will spend what's left of the summer on monster island with his son.
Jesus taking his cue from Godzilla said "think i'm going to see how dad doing, and promptly disappeared.

Only if Jesus rode a T. Rex, making him Jesusauras Rex, would Jesus win.

Only if Jesus rode a T. Rex, making him Jesusauras Rex, would Jesus win.

So obviously you haven't read the parts of the Quran which say just so.

They would mate and come forth...would be...


!!!!!!!!!!!JESILLA!!!!!!!!!


THE LIZARD OF GOD SWAMP


THE PROPHET OF THE EGG OF TIME






bow down before Jesilla, he is not merciful. Smite thee with mighty huge feet!

JE-SUS! JE-SUS! JE-SUS! JE-SUS! JE-SUS!

*smack*

ooh... that must have hurt

...

bumpity

I thought this was dead; I was wrong, whooohoo!

GOD-ZIL-LA! GOD-ZIL-LA! GOD-ZIL-LA! GOD-ZIL-LA! GOD-ZIL-LA!
*push*
ooh.... I wonder if he felt that

What if Jesus had access to Iron Man's powered armour?
http://www.freewebs.com/avengersassemble/current.jpg

Surely Jesus would turn the other cheek? (And get squished to prove a point - and THEN come back as Gandalf the White... or am I getting confused?)

Simple. Jesus would win.

As someone who is fully divine and a Person of the Most Holy Trinity, Christ is omnipotent and thus could easily kill Godzilla if He wanted to.

Catholic doctrine aside, just looking at the Scriptural evidence, it is clear that Christ could win. He has control over nature (calms the sea, feeds a ton of people with just a few loaves of bread and a little bit of fish), His resurrected body can go through matter yet can still interact with matter at will (see the last parts of John's Gospel), and can call up a significantly large reserve of angels if he wishes (I'll get the Biblical quote later, possibly). True, He was crucified, but as He said in John's Gospel (I believe) He laid His life down of His own accord.

So, yeah, Godzilla's got nothing on the Lord. :)

Um actually, he let them capture him. He could have called down an entire army of angles if he had wanted to.

And THAT'S how he'll beat Godzilla!

Acute or obtuse?

He'd probably need Acute because they're sharper, and would make a hole if you threw it hard enough.

Picture Godzilla kicking Jesus in the nads :eek:

godzilla was killed by mortals

jesus was killed by mortals

in theory i could kill both of them


Godzilla was not killed by mortals. In the first one aka Godzilla 1954 the oxygen destroyer makes him go poof. In Godzilla 1985 the reporter played by Raymond Burr says: "Thirty years ago they never did find a body"

The only time he dies is in Godzilla Vs. Destroyah. Even then he just melts down and Godzilla JR soaks up all the radiation and becomes the new G man

I think you're an idiot, though I'm sure Jesus would win. Even if Godzilla took him out, he'd be right back a few days later.

<snip>and can call up a significantly large reserve of angels if he wishes<snip>Wouldn't that be cheating, though?

It's kind of like two guys having a punch-on in the car park, and then all of a sudden, two buddies of one guy jump the other guy from behind...

...most unsportsmanlike conduct! :p

Wouldn't that be cheating, though?

It's kind of like two guys having a punch-on in the car park, and then all of a sudden, two buddies of one guy jump the other guy from behind...

...most unsportsmanlike conduct! :p
religion is not fair

Is this not a bump?

You are fools, Jesus will judge you you all with the... heh heh, just kidding.
However... if the initial gameplan went ahead, i.e. the Godzilla breath, charge 'n' stomp attack. then I predict this run of play:
1) Jesus dives into a handily placed sea of Galilee for cover from the radioactive breath.
2) As Godzilla starts to charge, Jesus rises onto the surface of the water (walking on water confusion tactic)
3) Godzilla becomes confused but starts to wade into the water anyway, spewing the breath (Jesus now out of range)
4) As GZ becomes slowed by the water, Jesus whips up a load of fish (terrifying godzilla eating fish) which swirl around taking bites out of GZ like so many piranhas.
5) While this is happening, Jesus has hastily turned the entire sea of Galilee into Cabernet Sauvignon 1999. GZ in his hurry to get out of the water, now sporting many fish bites, swallows a lot of this fine vintage and starts to feel woozy.
6) Finally Jesus whips up a sandstorm to dry out poor GZ. Feeling the loss of blood, along with severe inebriation and oral dryness, GZ falls asleep.
7) Jesus heals the wounds and replaces the blood. He then waits for GZ to wake up with THE BIGGEST HANGOVER of all time and threatens to do it again unless GZ stops fighting him and builds him a shrubbery.

Jesus lives, Godzilla goes into landscape gardening, everyone's happy.