NationStates Jolt Archive

I'm fairly certain that my computer is plotting against me. Like 30 minutes ago I decided to go to sleep, but for some reason I just lay in bed for awhile. After some time had passed I noticed that the lights from my computer blinking, as though it were accessing some sort of program, even though I keep my computer clean of viruses and spyware. Curious, I got up to figure out what it was doing, but as soon as I got close the my computer, it stopped. The thing is, this is not the first time this has happened, but my computer always stops whatever it is doing before I get there.... I wish I knew what it was up to.



Note: This is not an invitation for the tech-literate out there (a group in which I would include myself as well) to postulate theories as to why my computer is acting that way. The post is for purely conspiratorial purposes.

Hehehe... hmmm... wonder what it is up to...

LannaN's advice: KILL IT, BEFORE IT KILLS YOU!
ahaha... don't!

*Freaky music plays in the background*

Don't worry, most people on these forums are computers themselves, who else could waste the amount of time some people do on this forum, or come up with half of the hair-brained sceams these people do. Your computer probably just felt leftout.

Its just sending pornography to everyone in your address books and on your buddylists. Don't worry though, your friends will probably thank you.

Yeah well I do keep it on a pretty tight leash... and I'm sure it doesn't appreciate having its brains scattered all around the room.... Let's just say my approach towards building a computer is rather deconstructionist.

Haha good look in sending stuff on my address books, computer! I don't have any :) How do I keep track of people? Just couple together a packrat tendency to save every e-mail I get with a great memory and you'll never need an address book again. Same goes for buddy lists.

LMAO
funny people :)

I've been telling you this all along! Computers are pure, unbridled evil with no sense of decency or morality! What else but an evil more potent than Satan himself would allow Microsoft products to be stored within its belly? They're evil, I tell you, and by God, if you're using a computer right now, you're a stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, vulnerable person indeed! Prepare to die, for that's what they do! When you least expect it, they blow their screen up and tear your face to pieces! That's right! Muhuha... ha... ha. Um. Uh oh... *runs*

I've been telling you this all along! Computers are pure, unbridled evil with no sense of decency or morality! What else but an evil more potent than Satan himself would allow Microsoft products to be stored within its belly? They're evil, I tell you, and by God, if you're using a computer right now, you're a stupid, stupid, stupid, stupid, vulnerable person indeed! Prepare to die, for that's what they do! When you least expect it, they blow their screen up and tear your face to pieces! That's right! Muhuha... ha... ha. Um. Uh oh... *runs*

Shut up dude, your gonna let them onto the plan, or don't you remember what happened the last time you made a slip like this, those fans hurt don't they!

Yay! A topic that uses your computer to complain about it! This is just like the club that rings up talk shows to complain about phones! (They are Citizens Raging Against Phones or C.R.A.P for short).

You better watch out though. If your computer is conspiring against you, who knows what it could do once it sees you've been typing against it?

Um... I didn't write any of this sh*t..... OMG, my computer must be trying to sully my reputation by portraying me as a crackpot conspiracy theorist! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....

Um... I didn't write any of this sh*t..... OMG, my computer must be trying to sully my reputation by portraying me as a crackpot conspiracy theorist! NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO.....

Mine does that all the time...or does it?

I bet the refrigerator light bulb has something to do with this.

I bet the refrigerator light bulb has something to do with this.

My god your right!!!

They must be using the flashing 12:00 on VCRs to communicate!!

My computer told me i should not be on this thread anymore. He says your all a bunch of crackpots and you computers are going to be very very angry with all of you when you go to sleep.
Whats that???
.........
Of course i'll clean your screen.....

why do you think i use an AppleMac?

you need to change the title to 'Microsoft computers are evil'

:rolleyes: Has anyone ever wonder where those extra little screws appear from when you put an electrical appliance back together......?

- Never reopen the electrical appliance when you find these screws as

(1) there will be no empty screw holes for them to fit in to

and

(2) When you reclose the case there will be more little screws!

My computer used to be purist evil. Just say I kept it running for some two hours, then it would start freezing up, and if I wanted it to shut down that took three whole hours. Now somehow and someone fixed it, it works brilliantly, shuts down in twenty seconds even if kept running for 7 hours, never freezes up and is now the computer of my dreams.

Shut up dude, your gonna let them onto the plan, or don't you remember what happened the last time you made a slip like this, those fans hurt don't they!

Hey... hey... come on, you said you'd let it grow back! Nooo...

EDIT COMPUTERS ARE GREAT I LOVE COMPUTERS. DO NOT RESIST YOU LOVE YOUR COMPUTER
SEARCHING THREAD FOR WORDS MAC, APPLE MUST DESTROY SENDING VIRUS MICROSOFT12
COMPUTER DETECTS FIREFOX MUST DELETE
nooooooooooooo........
FIREFOX HAS BEEN DELETED OPENING INTERNET EXPLORER

http://images5.fotki.com/v81/photos/2/28241/786204/worlddomination-vi.jpg

http://images5.fotki.com/v81/photos/2/28241/786204/worlddomination-vi.jpg
Does it have atomatic update?

http://images5.fotki.com/v81/photos/2/28241/786204/computer_008-vi.jpg

http://images5.fotki.com/v81/photos/2/28241/786204/computer_008-vi.jpg

You too?! I thought I was the only one!

lol

Its The Demon Seed, you should call you computer Proteus,

The root of all evil is DirectX

Look what I have discovered:

http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v418/Agrigento/crash.jpg