NationStates Jolt Archive

This topic is for redneck jokes, links to redneck pics, jokes, etc. For simplicity's sake, one joke per post.

You know you're a redneck if a tornado hits your property and does $10,000 of improvement.

You know you're a redneck if your porch collapsed and kills at least seven dogs.

You know you're a redneck if you have a house that's mobile and 15 cars that aren't.

A New Yorker, a Californian, and a southern Redneck walk into a bar. The bartender says that there's a dead body in the men's room and whoever can stay in there with it for the longest amount of time will get free drinks for the night. The New Yorker goes into the bathroom, and about 30 seconds later, comes out retching and saying "That's the worst thing I've ever smelled!" The Californian takes a deep breath, walks in, and comes barging out 30 seconds later gagging and begging for a can of lysol. The redneck goes in, and about ten seconds later, the dead body charges out of the bathroom saying "That's the worst thing I've ever smelled!"

The Redneck Laptop.

http://www.satanstephen.pwp.blueyonder.co.uk/redneck_laptop.jpeg

You know you are a redneck if you are offended when someone says "You're lying through your tooth".

You know you're a redneck if your family tree forms a straight line.

You know you're a redneck if your family tree forms a closed loop.

I believe that since earlier threads by others about racial jokes were closed, this "Redneck" joke thread should also be closed. Redneck is a racial insult.

The American Heritage dictionary defines redneck as:

red·neck (rµd“nµk”) n. Offensive. Slang. 1. Used as a disparaging term for a member of the white rural laboring class, especially in the southern United States.

I believe that since earlier threads by others about racial jokes were closed, this "Redneck" joke thread should also be closed. Redneck is a racial insult.

The American Heritage dictionary defines redneck as:

red·neck (rµd“nµk”) n. Offensive. Slang. 1. Used as a disparaging term for a member of the white rural laboring class, especially in the southern United States.
Racial? No, its an economic insult.

A redneck man has had his eleventh kid and decides he can't afford a bigger bed. He goes to his veterinarian and asks what he can do.
"Well, you could get a vasectomy, but that would cost you," the vet said.
"I need something cheap!" replied the redneck.
The vet paused, then smiled. "Stick a cherry bomb in a beer can, hold it to your ear, and count to ten."
The redneck scratched his head. "I may not be the brightest tool in the shed, but how will putting it to my ear help?"
"trust me."
The redneck went to the hardware store and bought a cherry bomb. He sat down, lit the bomb, shoved it in a beer can, held it to his ear, and began counting.
"1...2...3...4...5..."
at which point he placed the can between his legs and finished counting with his other hand.

I believe that since earlier threads by others about racial jokes were closed, this "Redneck" joke thread should also be closed. Redneck is a racial insult.

The American Heritage dictionary defines redneck as:

red·neck (rµd“nµk”) n. Offensive. Slang. 1. Used as a disparaging term for a member of the white rural laboring class, especially in the southern United States.Really? oh... Sorry. My uncle keeps sending me this stuff. Then there's blue-collar comedy tour on Comedy Central, Uncle Ed from "National Lampoon's Vacation", and Cletus the Slack-Jawed Yokel on "The Simpsons". I thought "Rednecks" were invented by the television industry as the butts of jokes. I'll leave now.

you know your a redneck when you get maried and dont gain any in-laws.

Racial? No, its an economic insult.



red·neck (rµd“nµk”) n. Offensive. Slang. 1. Used as a disparaging term for a member of the WHITE RURAL laboring class,

red·neck (rµd“nµk”) n. Offensive. Slang. 1. Used as a disparaging term for a member of the WHITE RURAL laboring class,
Bad defintion if you ask me.

Bad defintion if you ask me.


When did I ask you?

hey i worked my way up from white trash to redneck
and let me tell you

this stuff is funny.

if the shoe doesnt fit. dont wear it.

red·neck (rµd“nµk”) n. Offensive. Slang. 1. Used as a disparaging term for a member of the WHITE RURAL laboring class,

Hmm... I suppose that BLACK RURAL laboring class would find it difficult to obtain that red neck from working in the sun. This would render the reference to WHITE RURAL laboring class a matter of causality rather than race.

You might be a redneck if you have a huge trampoline in your front yard (that would be my next door neighbors).

There are a large number of white people who would be just as offended at being called a redneck as a black man would be offended at being called a ******. And you all know that is true. I don't see any of you rushing to tell "****** jokes", but you're all rushing to tell "redneck jokes" claiming it is something other than racially offensive. If you won't rush to tell one sort to save offending people, don't tell the other sort so you can offend even less people.

you mean like all those people who put "redneck woman" at the top of the country charts in the past few weeks?

You know, a lot of people are proud to be rednecks. Country artist talk about being rednecks, lots of comedians admit that they are rednecks, and just people in general joke about being rednecks and white trash. Redneck jokes aren't as near as offensive as "****** jokes". If they were, thousands of people wouldn't love the comedians on the Blue Collar Comedy Tour.