NationStates Jolt Archive

What, and how much, if anything would u change physically to impress ur significant other's parents?

my bf is incredibly anxious about me meeting his parents, that they will scrutinise me down to the littlest detail.
he is trying his best to suggest how I might improve myself for them.
I know there's a place for making a good 1st impression, and yes thats exactly what I want to do. but I've never agreed with having to change myself, especially my physical appreance, just to win someone's aproval. it feels like I'm having to make a false impression, which I feel will only cause trouble later on.


any and all views?

Frankly I dont care if my girlfriends parents dont approve of me, its not them im going out with, but it is nice to be accepted and liked by them, makes the job alot easier. but so far as changing physical appearances that it who I am and I don't change for anyone, you can't act like it all the time, they're gonna find out who you really are eventually.

Frankly I dont care if my girlfriends parents dont approve of me, its not them im going out with, but it is nice to be accepted and liked by them, makes the job alot easier. but so far as changing physical appearances that it who I am and I don't change for anyone, you can't act like it all the time, they're gonna find out who you really are eventually.
exactly what I'm trying, and so far seemingly failing, to put accross to my bf
thank u

you should change NOTHING about yourself. its a big mistake to let a man or his parents dictate who you are

that said

be neat, clean and polite when you meet them. this shows respect.

dont pretend to have any political or religious opinions that you dont really have but there is no need to be confrontational about anything

after all they are meeting you too. they have to show themselves to be respectful and polite to YOU. if they are not nice to you, take careful note of how your boyfriend deals with it. if he cant stick up for you now, he wont stick up for you later either.

he is trying his best to suggest how I might improve myself for them.
As a bloke I feel happy saying he's an asshole: If any preperation is needed it should be on his part ("preparing the ground", so to speak) not yours.

I wouldn't call him an asshole. I would say that his trying so hard is a sign that he just wants everything to flow smoothly. Best option is to sit down and let him know... without name calling. :D

Toothbrushes are good at triggering your gag reflex.

No getting drunk and proposing homicide/suicide pacts. At least not with the parents around.

(To #7)

...What?

What, and how much, if anything would u change physically to impress ur significant other's parents?

I would say that you need to be yourself. Don't try to change for anyone but YOU.

That said, you may want to wear more toned down clothing if you like to wear something dramatic.

(To #7)

...What?

I guess I'm #7, did you know that there's a quote function?

I was suggesting a quick way to lose a few pounds.

What, and how much, if anything would u change physically to impress ur significant other's parents?

Besides getting my hair cut nothing.

But I am learning mandarin just so I can impress my gf's dad.

For the sake of clarity, do these physical changes involve surgery of any kind?

Never had a problem like that. My mom always liked my g/fs. Well, the ones she knew about.

to impress your bf's parents I suggest changing your underwear :D :p

to impress your bf's parents I suggest changing your underwear :D :p
Aah.. So thats where the smell was coming from.

to impress your bf's parents I suggest changing your underwear :D :p

Did you come up with this before or after the complaints?;)

Did you come up with this before or after the complaints?;)

Well after failing to do so and losing the respect of my gf's parents, I feel its a good piece of advice to pass on.

The last time I had to meet a girlfriends parents I showed up with my shaggy long hair and beard in my ratty-ass loud sports car with the top down and the stereo blaring free jazz.

Oddly enough, they didn't like me.

At the time I didn't know she had 'decided' we where going to be dating. I was just looking for something to do and no one else was home. As far as I knew I was just meeting some friends parents, I didn't know she was telling them about 'this great guy'.......

ah well.....other girlfriends parents have liked me........

Don't change.

The first time I met one of my g/fs parents I was so bloody drunk I could hardly stand. But they loved me. Go figure.

cheers all!
no surgery necesary, or being asked of, and no need for the toothbrush thing either
and my bf admits he sounds like an asshole, but I know he isnt trying to be one

he really is just totally worried. his mum just let rip about a girl her brother is thinking of marrying and he doesnt want the same happening to us

yes I am going to be polite and respectful, and not wear anything that would raise eyebrows, or say anything that would be detrimental... but that all kinda goes without saying I think

I'm sure all will be well.. just his panicing made me panic a bit...

How old are the two of you? The insecurities of youth may be affecting him I know when I was younger I woried about those things, but not any more.
(FWIW, I brought my Japanese GF home last Xmas and the family absolutely loved her. She was a lot more worried than I was.)

I'm 21, he's 22...
and I'm his 1st 'proper' relationship... so I know a lot's cos of that.

and then there's the fact his parents are Indian... which I accept they have their own cultural expectations.

he's Candian and not strict about his culture/religion, and although I also have indian heritage I have been btought up in a totally white british environment, so I think we're both expecting a little bit of friction on the cultural front too...

Go dressed as a tribal Inidan and do a rain dance as you enter the door. That'll show 'em. Or they could be the other kind of Indians and that wouldn't apply.

Go dressed as a tribal Inidan and do a rain dance as you enter the door. That'll show 'em. Or they could be the other kind of Indians and that wouldn't apply.
lol...wrong sort of indians hun!
his parents moved to canada from india about 25-30yrs ago

Damn, well. Eh.. I'm out of "clever" stereotypes so... to jump on the bandwagon, "Be yourself." Or kill them.

like I said to my bf
I cant give more than 100% me
being me is all I know how to do

seems I shall be meeting his parents in 5 weeks or so....