NationStates Jolt Archive

Okay--the worst movie thread is humming along nicely, so here's the chance to tell on yourself. What's the worst movie you actually paid money to own, that continues to sit on your entertainment center and that in occasional moments of madness, you still drop into the vcr or dvd player? Don't be shy--we've all got them.

My secret shame? Strange Days, starring Rafe Fiennes and Angela Bassett. A close second would be L.A. Story, a Steve Martin p.o.s. that I somehow can't bring myself to get rid of, perhaps because of the scene where a blond British woman is playing the song "Doo Wah Diddy" on the tuba.

Next?

Next?

Alien3. It has about one minute of good stuff in it, and circa an hour and forty five minutes of complete nonsense and wasted opportunities. I even prefer the much maligned "Alien: Resurrection" to it, but I am not going to claim that A:R is not without its problems. The fact that they didn't realise that "Alien: Resurrection - Special Edition" would be refered to by the acronym "ARSE" is not the least of these...

The fact that they didn't realise that "Alien: Resurrection - Special Edition" would be refered to by the acronym "ARSE" is not the least of these...Damn you! I almost spat coffee all over my keyboard with that one.

Bruce Almighty... damn that movie was horrible... that and Peacemaker... yeah...

I heard Alien3 is godawful.

Worst movie I own? Hannibal. Hands down. Thumbs down, too, actually.

I also owned Mortal Kombat:Annihilation at one time. I managed to pass it off on my kid when she moved back to her mom's. Managed to get rid of Spawn the same way.

The worst movie I own is Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles 3. The one where they travel back in time. Yep.

i own the Breakfast Club. *hangs head in shame* i didn't buy it, it was a gift, i swear.

It came with my DVD player!

LOST IN SPACE! :eek:

i own the Breakfast Club. *hangs head in shame* i didn't buy it, it was a gift, i swear.
You can send it to me if you like--i love that flick, even to this day.

I thought Alien Resurrection blew Alien 3 totally away. Alien 3, basically destroyed everything cool about the Alien universe; well they killed off the survivors of Aliens, anyway, without even any screen time. Plus, well, it was hard to sympathize for a bunch of criminals, and bald headed heroines never did it for me, not in GI Jane and not in Alien 3 and not in Sinead O'Connor.

Whereas Alien Resurrection is watchable.

And hey, LA Story is almost a classic! Nothing like a little biting satire for the californian yuppie culture. Unfortunately the latter has morphed, so the movie is kind of dated, but its always a good cause.

But anyway, I don't own either of those movies. The worst movie I own has to be... Plan 9 From Outer Space. Yep. Also happens to be the worst movie of all time.

You can send it to me if you like--i love that flick, even to this day.

Same here!

You can send it to me if you like--i love that flick, even to this day.

it's such shlock, yet i watch it...i feel so dirty. but then, i also own Batman and Robin (for the Arnold, you know), and so i'm already just about the most pathetic movie owner ever :).

Whereas Alien Resurrection is watchable.

Its digital swimming aliens with incredibly skinny legs make up for a lot of faults, as does the appearance of Ron Perlman.

I also owned Mortal Kombat:Annihilation at one time. I managed to pass it off on my kid when she moved back to her mom's. Managed to get rid of Spawn the same way.
But Spawn is teh pwnz :(

Same here!

Me three!

Interestingly Ron Perlman appears in another movie with the wheelchair bound French guy: City of the Lost Children, which as a foreign film and strange as well, doesn't get as good reviews as it ought to, but its great. Kind of like a nightmarish fairy tale on acid.

BUt I digress.

The worst movie I own is probably The Yellow Submarine, an animated Beatles movie, I loved it when I was younger.

I have a hard time retaining media for some reason, but despite this problem I still possess the unopened copy of Sammy the Seal that someone got as a joke because my knickname is Walrus. (Why didn't I name my nation "Walrustopia, Walrustan, Walrusia etc? Shut-up, that's why....)

I also own Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles, but, you see.....I bought the second issue of the comic when it was an underground deal and I was all into underground comics and then for a few years I actually was a Ninja Turtle at kids birthday for a living. Best job ever.

Incertonia:DAMMIT, LA Story is a good movie, if a little sappy. I like it, and that cinematographer is great. He does a great bit in a crappy movie, Addicted to Love where the obsessed boyfriend uses a telescope and projector to spy on his ex-girlfriend. As he is painting his wall white (literally, sickos) his ex comes in and he starts painting where she is standing and as she moves through her apartment he paints where she goes. Really beautiful scene..........for a stalking scene.....but anyway......

Interestingly Ron Perlman appears in another movie with the wheelchair bound French guy: City of the Lost Children, which as a foreign film and strange as well, doesn't get as good reviews as it ought to, but its great. Kind of like a nightmarish fairy tale on acid.


Yeah - it was made by the same directors as 'ARSE'.

Interestingly Ron Perlman appears in another movie with the wheelchair bound French guy: City of the Lost Children, which as a foreign film and strange as well, doesn't get as good reviews as it ought to, but its great. Kind of like a nightmarish fairy tale on acid.

BUt I digress.
Same director.

Makes you think that there is an interesting version of ARSE (that is funny) laying on an editing room floor somewhere....

28 days later. I saw it, it sounded cool...so I got it.

Little did I know the acting was horrible, I could have filmed it, and it made no sense.

Worst and I know it: Lethal Weapon 4, Feilx the Cat: The Movie, Deep Blue Sea or Alien Ressurrection (sorry apart from Brad Dourif it was utter love making produce.) :fluffle: :mp5:

Worst but I love 'em: Spaceballs, Bram Stoker's Dracula or Alien 3 (i can seriously find nothing wrong with it outside ropey CGI and Pete Poselthwaite)

The Pit and the Pendulum (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0100369/). I bought because a) I love Edgar Allen Poe, and b) It had Oliver Reed in it (not that he is one of my favorite mind. I just thought with him in it, it couldn't be that bad). However, obviously he was short of money that week and needed a drink, he was in it for around 1 minute.

However, it came with a few trailers, which seemed worse. The 'best' one of the was called Ankle Biters. It is about midget werewolves, and comes with the tagline " Three feet tall! Two inch fangs!" And the hero has obviously just watched the Matrix and decided to try it without having the money nor technology.

Makes you think that there is an interesting version of ARSE (that is funny) laying on an editing room floor somewhere....

I think ARSE is interesting, but has its irritating moments - yes, it is a remake of The Poseidon Adventure in space, and yes it has your skinny shoplifting women playing an android, and it has as many plot holes as a colander, but it maintains a level of visual interest and some nice performances.

It is the coherent version of Alien3 that I mourn for - there were so many scripts accepted, then rejected, there must have been something an awful lot better than the one they finally settled on.

However, it came with a few trailers, which seemed worse. The 'best' one of the was called Ankle Biters. It is about midget werewolves, and comes with the tagline " Three feet tall! Two inch fangs!" And the hero has obviously just watched the Matrix and decided to try it without having the money nor technology.
Man that sounds bad enough to be funny...

28 days later. I saw it, it sounded cool...so I got it.

Little did I know the acting was horrible, I could have filmed it, and it made no sense.

Which bit didn't you think made sense?


Personally I think it should have just finished when they ram the taxi into the gate coming out of the military compound, but I think that would have made even more people dislike it.

Man that sounds bad enough to be funny...

Tell me about it. I've been looking in HMV etc for a copy. I think it would probably be only a quid.

If I knew how I'd stick the trailer on the internet to spread the hilarity.

Two other contenders would:

1. Day of the Triffids
2. The Miracle Maker (Animated film about Jesus. Never bought it, never recieved it as a gift, no idea how it got into my possession, don't have the heart to throw it away.)
3. Jonny Mnenomic (sp?)

2. The Miracle Maker (Animated film about Jesus. Never bought it, never recieved it as a gift, no idea how it got into my possession, don't have the heart to throw it away.)

Hey did you watch that Jesus the musical? Where the Romans had tanks and all?

I dunno if it was meant to be funny or wasn't.... but it was anyways.

Oooh--I have Johnny Mnemonic too.

Hey did you watch that Jesus the musical? Where the Romans had tanks and all?

I dunno if it was meant to be funny or wasn't.... but it was anyways.
Oh my God, I forgot I had that. I'm almost tempted to check all my films. I usually buy second hand films for about £1, so I have plenty of crap ones.

Which bit didn't you think made sense?


Personally I think it should have just finished when they ram the taxi into the gate coming out of the military compound, but I think that would have made even more people dislike it.

maybe not making sense was a bad phrase to use...the movie felt disjointed. Then again...I liked the Resident Evil movie that many people don't like.

The Sound of Music. It was a gift from my senile grandmother.

The Sound of Music. It was a gift from my senile grandmother.
Me and my sisters mere given a Boyzone Live at ..... video for Christmas a while ago (Boyzone were v popular a few years ago in Britain). The problem being that the kindly old woman who gave it to us, wrapped it in tranlucent wrapping paper so we knew what it was. We found it again a few months ago. Still in its wrapping paper.

Then again...I liked the Resident Evil movie that many people don't like.

Yeah, I liked that one as well. It is chewing gum for the eyes and brain, but it makes no great claims to profoundity or anything.

I also once owned a copy of Spice World, given to me by my boss who thought my daughter would enjoy it. She did, and played it so often I wanted to shoot myself.

The Sound of Music.

This film was actually banned in parts of Northern Ireland as papist propaganda and thus the works of the antichrist that sits in Rome.*





*No, I'm not making this up.

Simply Irresistible with Sarah Michelle Gellar and Sean Patrick Flanery.
My boyfriend and I somehow thought we needed to buy all of Sean Patrick Flanery's movies that we found in the $5 bin at wal-mart
bad idea
other bad movies from that bin:
Con Express (also with SPF)
Too young to die? (Brad Pitt and Julliette Lewis)
and more I'm sure...but we DID find Suicide Kings, and that movie is awesome

I would have to say the Movie "Excalaber" and "X"