NationStates Jolt Archive

Imagine you are crushing on two people at once. Guy #1 was the first person you liked at the beginning of the school year, then you found out you live close together and so you became best friends and you tend to like him on and off, and he the same with you, but you've agreed that even though you'd go well together you won't go out now. He's super hot, has a great sense of style, and has a reputation as "the gayest straight guy in the world." Basically the big reasons you like him are that he's practically your identical personality twin, plus he's seriously the sexiest guy in the damn school, all other grades included. Guy #2 on the other hand, is someone you also have liked first obsessively, then on and off for most of the year. Well several months ago, he said no. He is a year younger than you and doesn't date yet. He is this cute math nerd, and the main reasons you like him are intelligence, this sense of innocence about him, and how cute he is not just in appearance but in this nerdy way he carries himself. Your relationships with them are different too - Guy #1 is your best friend and you talk/phone/visit every day; guy #2 is much more reserved and although you talk a fair amount in class and many days at lunch, you only know each others' phone numbers because you had to emergency-scramble on a school project on a weekend. Well, you've tried to distract yourself by noticing how hot Keanu Reeves is, but it didn't really work. Oh, and another little detail - both guys hate each other.

IT'S EXTREMELY FRUSTRATING!

RESPOND DAMMIT YOU PEOPLES!

*draws pocketknife and calmly begins a countdown from 10 before she stabs everyone who's looked and not posted*

RESPOND DAMMIT YOU PEOPLES!

*draws pocketknife and calmly begins a countdown from 10 before she stabs everyone who's looked and not posted**posts to avoid being stabbed*

YIPES!

zinc, you know what? i could care less 8)

*sees posts and puts away knife*

so can i get some real replies now?

Um... Make advances on both of them... and uh.... yeah.... Wow... I hate situations like this... it makes me think of middle school... what a death trap.

*sees posts and puts away knife*

so can i get some real replies now?What do you want us to say? If we say "go out with No. 1", then you'll say "but Guy 2 is soooo smart". And if we say "go out with No. 2", then you'll say "but Guy 2 is soooo cute".

Personally, I'd go with No. 2, cos he sounds more like me, so somewhere out there, I'm doing a fellow geek a favour. Also I think No 1 is gay.

youve known guy 1 for most of a year and you arent all over each other. put the thought of romance with him aside for now
guy 2 isnt dating at all, resolve to end up as the first girl he does date, maybe next fall eh?
look around for guy 3 who might actually end up going out with you
no sense waiting on guys who arent ready when there are so many out there who are
distract yourself with guy 3, 4, 5, 6....

*sees posts and puts away knife*

so can i get some real replies now?What do you want us to say? If we say "go out with No. 1", then you'll say "but Guy 2 is soooo smart". And if we say "go out with No. 2", then you'll say "but Guy 2 is soooo cute".

Personally, I'd go with No. 2, cos he sounds more like me, so somewhere out there, I'm doing a fellow geek a favour. Also I think No 1 is gay.

I'm not asking who to go out with, because as I have clearly explained, neither is an option. Guy 1 is bi, not gay, but in any case we have an agreement - he is an option for later on when we're more mature, if that ends up happening. Guy 2 I would go out with, except that he's not interested in anyone, let alone me. Well, actually, I expect I'd be close to the top of his list for crushes, but the main point is he doesn't have one.

I'm asking what do I do to keep it from driving me nuts. Here are three things that don't/wouldn't work, just so you know what I've already figured out:

1. Noticing celebrities. Keanu Reeves is hot, but I can't use him a distraction all the time.
2. Going after guy 1, because he'd probably go out with me - but I like him too much to go out with him right now.
3. Going after guy 2, because he's already told me no and I'll just annoy the hell out of him that way.

Maybe I'll just try to absorb myself in etymology and linguistics so I forget about my stupid lovelife.

Find Guy 3.

Thats what I always do. Love and love again. Get rejected over and over. Learn, move on, try not to get downhearted.

/me sets mode: +angst Zincite

youve known guy 1 for most of a year and you arent all over each other. put the thought of romance with him aside for now
guy 2 isnt dating at all, resolve to end up as the first girl he does date, maybe next fall eh?
look around for guy 3 who might actually end up going out with you
no sense waiting on guys who arent ready when there are so many out there who are
distract yourself with guy 3, 4, 5, 6....

[guy 1 comment]...the key words being "for now." Trust me, we would be if we were either of us in the frame of mind for a long-term romantic commitment. Basically I'm saving the idea until we're both on that plane because that's what I want with him - not a 2-week relationship.

[guy 2 comment] Yep that's pretty much my plan... I hope. Problem is, I have until the end of next school year to become good friends before he takes off for some other high school. And believe me he's damn hard to get close to.

[guy 3 thing] Eh, there are guys I could probably have if I wanted, but I've promised myself to never again date out of desperation. If I don't really like them, I won't go out with them. As tempting as the prospect may be.

Have you ever tried cutting yourself? I hear troubled young ladies often find solace in pointy objects. If this is a problem you need to querry in nationstates I'd suggest getting out more and finding something meaningful to mope about.

TAJ the all knowing

/me sets mode: +angst Zincite
/me sets mode: +thehellareyoutalkingaboutTG?

*AHEM*

Will you all quit telling me to find a Guy #3. That just makes everything more complicated. The point is not at all to have a boyfriend. I'm perfectly fine single. The point is to not be driven crazy by guys I can't have. Three guys will just make me crazy from guys I can't have and one I do. NO DESPERATION DATING.

/me sets mode: +angst Zincite
/me sets mode: +thehellareyoutalkingaboutTG?
It's a mock IRC command. The idea being increasing the amount of angst Zincite has to the next level.

More constructively, I would say that she worries too much about things which will soon turn out to be quite unimportant. Recognizing this fact would be the first step to putting a lot of stress behind her.

*AHEM*

Will you all quit telling me to find a Guy #3. That just makes everything more complicated. The point is not at all to have a boyfriend. I'm perfectly fine single. The point is to not be driven crazy by guys I can't have. Three guys will just make me crazy from guys I can't have and one I do. NO DESPERATION DATING.Have you considered the advantages of having these guys just as friends?

*AHEM*

Will you all quit telling me to find a Guy #3. That just makes everything more complicated. The point is not at all to have a boyfriend. I'm perfectly fine single. The point is to not be driven crazy by guys I can't have. Three guys will just make me crazy from guys I can't have and one I do. NO DESPERATION DATING.Have you considered the advantages of having these guys just as friends?

*stares incredulously*

...did I not effectively communicate that that's how things are at this point?

*AHEM*

Will you all quit telling me to find a Guy #3. That just makes everything more complicated. The point is not at all to have a boyfriend. I'm perfectly fine single. The point is to not be driven crazy by guys I can't have. Three guys will just make me crazy from guys I can't have and one I do. NO DESPERATION DATING.Have you considered the advantages of having these guys just as friends?

*stares incredulously*

...did I not effectively communicate that that's how things are at this point?Yes, but you also expressed your extreme dissatisfication at that state of affairs.

It's a mock IRC command. The idea being increasing the amount of angst Zincite has to the next level.

More constructively, I would say that she worries too much about things which will soon turn out to be quite unimportant. Recognizing this fact would be the first step to putting a lot of stress behind her.

I do realize that - it's not my fault. Believe me, if I could make myself quit crushing on these guys, or at the very least ignore the fact that I like them, I would.

Now another thing to consider - even without my liking both of them, there's the issue of being friends with two people who hate each other. Now that's a stressball you can't just label "unimportant."

Have you considered the advantages of having these guys just as friends?

*stares incredulously*

...did I not effectively communicate that that's how things are at this point?Yes, but you also expressed your extreme dissatisfication at that state of affairs.

gah, no that wasn't the point at all. i love being just friends with these guys, and that's why it annoys the shit out of me that i like them both, especially when they hate each other.

Give up.... Go Bi.... Girls are easy. :wink:

dont worry, internet crushes need your home address, not just your e-mail

Have you considered the advantages of having these guys just as friends?

*stares incredulously*

...did I not effectively communicate that that's how things are at this point?Yes, but you also expressed your extreme dissatisfication at that state of affairs.

gah, no that wasn't the point at all. i love being just friends with these guys, and that's why it annoys the shit out of me that i like them both, especially when they hate each other.Well, theres not much you can do about them hating each other. I know that if my friends decided to try and force me to be nice to the person I hated, I'd get pissed to hell with them. Let them hate each other... and hope it doesn't end in their mutual destruction.

Oh, oh, or.... you could have one of them save the others life. But that might be kinda risky.

Give up.... Go Bi.... Girls are easy. :wink:

*narrows eyes* it's not a choice. believe me, in seventh grade i tried so hard to be bi, and the fact is i'm straight. girls ARE easier, but that's probably because i wasn't ever really attracted to them.

Well, theres not much you can do about them hating each other. I know that if my friends decided to try and force me to be nice to the person I hated, I'd get pissed to hell with them. Let them hate each other... and hope it doesn't end in their mutual destruction.

Oh, oh, or.... you could have one of them save the others life. But that might be kinda risky.

LOL, considering each has told me they want the other to die, I don't think that would work, but thanks anyway. :lol:

That's really my biggest problem though...

Funny, this is reminding me of a creepy psychology game I used to play. I'm stuck in a room with the two guys and somebody gives one of us a gun. The person with the gun has to shoot someone or all three of us die. I imagined depending on who got the gun, what would happen. I got the gun, I'd kill myself; guy 1 got the gun he'd kill guy 2; guy 2 got the gun, and he's too nice he'd probably drop the gun and get us all killed. u know what i am going to refer to guy 1 as joel and guy 2 as allyn from now onh in this thread because the numbers weird me out.

smart people can use their brains to help improve their looks.
cute people cannot get smart.