NationStates Jolt Archive

Well, I'm a wireless sales rep. A few days ago a Coworker of mine, Matt and I were extremely bored and after reading a list of knockoff porn movies, were extremely amused. I think it was the mix of both that gave me this Great idea, to call video stores around the area and ask them for movie titles.

After reading through the list we chose the movies we thought would be best to ask. We wrote them all on a list and first decided to call Suncoast Videos...

*phone rings*
Employee: Hello, Suncoast Videos
Me: I have a few movies i was looking to buy, I have a whole list. I was wondering if you guys carried the movie "Blow"
Employee: Yes we do it's 34.99
Me: Hmm ok can you put that on the side for me? Also i'm looking for Snatch
Employee: Yes sir we do it's 32.99
Me: Alright Alright Alright Do you happen to have "Schindlers Fist"
Employee: Uhhhh you mean Schindlers list?
Me: Uhh sure
Employee: Yes we do have it
Me: Alright and for my last movie i'm looking for The Sperminator... and not the first one, the sequel Fudgement day
*Employee hangs up*

Then we decided to call Circuit City

Matt: hello i have a few video's i'm looking for
Employee: Yeah no problem
Matt: i'm looking for Snatch
Employee: Yeah we have that
Matt: Umm do you have the movie Baredevil?
*Employee hangs up*

After we got bored with Circuit City we called Best Buy

Employee: Best Buy, Videos...
Me: I was wondering if you had Wanker Willy and the Fudge Packery
*employee hangs up*

Then Matt got a brilliant idea... to say You're burned to the last person on our list... Blockbuster.

Matt: Excuse me can you please put some movies aside for me?
Manager: Oh no problem
Matt: Hey i'm looking for Blow?
Manager: yeah we have that
Matt: How about Womb Raider
Manager: Uhh
Matt: HAHA YOU"VE BEEN BURNED!

*matt hangs up*

A few minutes later, my store got a call. My manager then came up to Matt and I... because we were the only one's cracking up the entire time while everyone else was in a work induced catatonic state.

"Don, Matt did you guys just call up Blockbuster looking for Womb Raider?"
Matt: "Uhh no *snicker*"
Me: "Uhh nope"
My Manager: "alright fine but if I find out its you you're screwed"
Me to matt: "dude think we should just tell him"
Matt: "yeah probably"

I then call up my manager, tell him we did it and then my manager proceeded to write us both up and give us correctives telling us not to use the phones again.
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Oh yeah i've left for a while because i've been chained up in my basement by the Taliban. I escaped a few hours ago to tell my story to Nationstates.... nobody else will believe me....

Damn those Afghans...

Next time just call one of those 900 numbers (on company time of course); they have all those titles... :wink:

LOL!!

Thanks for the laughs :lol:

Maybe you could call Blockbuster again to ask if they have "the Monica 'Deepthroat' Lewinsky Connection" :lol:

Or "Bush&Cheney--a homoerotic adventure story for the entire family" :lol:

Actually i was thinking more along the lines of

Mast Her and Command Her
RoboCock
Fister Act II

y'know stuff like that...

Ah, I see you are more into the whole dungeons and chains S&M scene. :shock:

Well, to each his own :)

It's hysterical and all, but did you really think you wouldn't get in trouble doing it from company phones? I doubt your company wants to be thought of as prank callers looking for porno.

Oh yeah you know it :wink:

It doesn't really matter...
I suppose you're right but

It was a thursday i hadn't done anything in hours because i was stuck doing a 4 hour cell phone sale because a n00b sales ass screwed it up and they had to drag my sales rep self down there to talk them through some stuff. no fun... i was just helping lighten up the employees.. jeez pessimist.

It doesn't really matter...
I suppose you're right but

It was a thursday i hadn't done anything in hours because i was stuck doing a 4 hour cell phone sale because a n00b sales ass screwed it up and they had to drag my sales rep self down there to talk them through some stuff. no fun... i was just helping lighten up the employees.. jeez pessimist.

Nah, I think it's hysterical. I'm still laughing now. But it's not as if you were blindsided by the idea of getting in trouble. You had to know it was coming.

I think, actually, that the hillarity of the moment overshadowed the forethought of any form of correction from my boss. It didn't matter much though not to me and all the guys at that particular store like me a lot more now. Which is cool because when you're a rep and you have to go store to store you have to have a good reputation with the guys you work with.

So aside from a little correction nothin bad really happened

I think, actually, that the hillarity of the moment overshadowed the forethought of any form of correction from my boss. It didn't matter much though not to me and all the guys at that particular store like me a lot more now. Which is cool because when you're a rep and you have to go store to store you have to have a good reputation with the guys you work with.

So aside from a little correction nothin bad really happened

Yeah...except you can't do it again. That's the real tragedy here.

oh... I will, I will... you just wait for Pt. II

Hmm how can high quality humor like this leave the first page while drivel like

"I like it up the butt, and i'm proud of that!"
"Jews Dont suck as much as most people think they do!"
"There is no God!"
"blah blah Religion Blah blah"

come on... it needs to be good.

"playmate of the apes" sounds disturbing (that WAS in Blockbusters!)

i should try that sometime :lol: