Tumaniaa
12-04-2004, 17:58
http://www.hurstwic.org/history/articles/mythology/myths/pix/Audhumla.jpg
After the 2 cars per person "revolution" in Iceland, the public transport system in Reykjavik changed alot. Public transport is viewed as the vehicle of poverty and not many people use it.
As with many things, when people with money no longer want or need these services, public transport has been neglected.
What the passengers of the public transport system are witnessing is probably the downside of having "the highest standard of living in the world". Nobody in their right mind takes the bus unless they have to. The welfare system provides free bus-tickets to those having problems coping in the country with "the highest standard of living in the world®".
Hence the usual crowd of passengers usually consists of students, disabled people, junkies, people with mental problems...etc.
The result is that bus-centrals have become quite "interesting" places (and what can possibly be called the worst public transport system in the galaxy. The only way they could make it worse would be by replacing all the buses with a rickshaw operated by an arthritic alzheimers patient with a dicky heart).
The bus central in Reykjavik centrum is quite an unusual place for these reasons. It is one of the very few places in Reykjavik where travellers are encouraged to have their wits about them when passing by (as you always should when standing between a group of junkies who look like they could laugh off a hepatitis-C infection and a drunk having an arguement with himself).
There is a certain breed of alcoholics that inhabits the place, the one that calls the central bus stop their home. It has everything they need, across the street from the bus stop is the police station, so when they lose control, get hungry or tired, all they have to do is do is smack someone and they will be escorted across the street to sleep it off (usually they get a free meal too), this symbiotic relationship saves the police alot of work too. Another thing about this place is that probably every single religion that does "missionary" work has representatives hanging out there to "assist the unlucky ones", as well as minor political parties that need to collect signatures on petitions...etc.
It is with some sadness that I tell you that I am one of the people that relies on public transport. I live across the street from that very same bus-stop and every morning, I take the bus from there.
One day when I was on my way to work, waiting for the bus, I noticed one of the people that usually hang out there at that time handing out little pieces of paper.
This guy is quite a sight, his usual outfit consists of military camouflage clothing, a beret, pink eyeliner and high heels (the type women wear). This wouldn't be so unusual if he didn't sport that long beard. Usually he has a bottle of something awful in his hand too.
Today he was different, he was wearing a suit and no make-up, and no high heels either.
He handed me a piece of paper.
And watched me with a big smile on his face as I read it.
It read: "RELIGION & SCIENCE UNITE!" "The TRUTH!!!" "EVOLUTION IS A LIE! FIND OUT WHY!".
There was a picture of some kind of a church on it that looked like a flower, it didn't look like it was in Iceland.
I looked ap at him and asked: "And you belong to this...group?"
"Yes" he said, still smiling, showing off all three of his teeth.
"So that's why you're wearing a suit today?"
"Yes"
"Did you quit drinking?"
"Not today...Maybe later" he said.
"So what is it?" I asked.
"It's a school! They give you money!" He said and lit a cigarette.
"They give you money???"
"Yes...And books!"
"And you give them...?" I was picturing some kind of a weird ceremony thing. What would the usual bunch of minority cults want with a mentally-challenged alcoholic? Sacrifice the poor bastard to some twisted demon they had made up?
"Nothing...I just show up, listen and they give me a book" He said, grinning like he had just found the key to unlimited access to the presidents bank account.
"And they want everyone! That's why they told me to give these to everyone" He said and showed be the little pieces of paper like the one he had just handed to me.
He then went off to hand the pieces of paper to other people, while I finished reading the one he handed me.
"The origins of the universe! The Icelandic school system hides the truth from it's pupils!" it said. It had an address and a time on it too.
The note was very vague though. It had a logo I recognized, "the cross" logo ("The Cross" is a Christian extremist church)
I was curious.
The next wednesday night I put a notebook, pencil and an apple in a plastic bag and decided to go to that school and learn all the wonderful things they could teach me.
It was dark outside and snowing, and I had to walk.
A guy wearing a suit was at the entrance. I was early so I decided to linger outside for a bit and smoke a cigarette.
The guy in the suit said nothing, just watched me.
When I had finished I said "Is this the school that will unite religion and science?" "Yes" He said "Come in". "It's free, right?" I asked.
"Yes, of course" he said.
It was a small room with maybe twenty desks and chairs facing a teachers desk with a blackboard. I put the apple on the teachers desk and then found a seat at the front row of desks.
The man in the suit came in and sat down at the teachers desk.
Three teenagers entered, two girls and a boy, they looked about 16 years old. Then a shaggy looking man in his 40's entered. They all sat down at desks like I had done.
The guy in the suit introduced himself as Ragnar.
"Well, that seems to be it then...We should get started..."
A little old lady entered and sat down by a desk.
"Well...Let's get started then..." Ragnar said.
"What we are here to learn today is what the school will not teach you, the REAL story of how the world was formed."
I raised my hand.
"Yes" Ragnar said.
"Is it Ymir and Audhumla?" I asked
"Is it what?"
"Ymir and Audhumla, the giant and the cow?"
"No! Of course not!" Ragnar said.
Maybe it is time to explain a bit before I go on, about Ýmir & Auðhumla", they are persons from the pagan story of creation. I was raised in the old custom, which is the ancient pagan religion of Iceland. Although I don't really believe in the pagan version of the story of creation and I am not really "religious" or an active worshipper, I still belong to the asatru church of iceland (I believe in some things and some I don't believe in at all...it would take alot of time to explain that here&now). But I decided beforehand that I would become fiercely religious for one night, THIS night. But in short, the story goes like this: "Ymir was a giant who lived floating in the void, he lived happily just floating in the void and drinking the milk of Audhumla, a cow.
According to the story of creation, Odin, Vili and Vé killed Ymir the giant and created "earth" from his body parts.
This was something I "believed" on that night.
So...back to my story:
"So...what is it then?" I asked.
"It's necessary to know that in the beginning God created heaven and earth". He said
"No it wasn't! Everyone knows that it was Odin, Vili and Vé that did it!"
There was a long silence.
Ragnar said: "I see that you have been misled..."
"No, you have been misled! This is blasphemy!" I said (nb: there is no blasphemy in asatru).
"I'm sorry you feel that way...but surely you must know that Ymir and Audhumla are fictional characters in the Edda's!"
"So next you're going to tell me Askur and Embla weren't the first people on earth?" I said
"Well...they weren't!"
"Oh...so you're one of those nutcases that believes in evolution then?" I said angrily.
"No no...nothing like that! If you'd just listen to logic..."
"So us coming from MONKEYS is logic!?" I said.
"No...You see...Have you never heard about Adam and Eve???" He said, looking frustrated.
"Well...yes...but that's just a bunch of misguided lies" I said. "Everyone knows it was Askur and Embla! Surely you must know your HISTORY!" I said.
"Of course..."
"Or would you rather be a slave to the Danish queen?" I cut him off.
"What??? No!"
"Wait...I have to listen to this anti-indipendance blasphemous royalist garbage for two hours?!?!?" I said angrily.
"I don't see what the Danish queen has got to do with anything!" Ragnar said.
"Ah...You ignore your own history! You preach Norwegian fairytales and you don't know our story of creation! You're a royalist heretic!" I was almost shouting at Ragnar.
"No! Iceland is christian and independant! You know that!" Ragnar said.
"Hah this coming from a guy who says Audhumla is a fictional character!"
"Iceland has been Christian for a thousand YEARS!"
"And for most of that time we've had a foreign king! Heretic!"
"Yes...but we aren't anymore!" Ragnar said...He looked like he was trying to calm down.
"I won't listen to this royalist crap anymore!"
I took my apple of the table and left, I slammed the door.
Two days later I saw the guy who had handed me that piece of paper advertizing the "school". He wasn't wearing a suit anymore.
I walked up to him and told him: "Do you still go to that school you were on about the other day."
"No" he said.
"I went...It was bullshit." I said.
"I know" he replied.
After the 2 cars per person "revolution" in Iceland, the public transport system in Reykjavik changed alot. Public transport is viewed as the vehicle of poverty and not many people use it.
As with many things, when people with money no longer want or need these services, public transport has been neglected.
What the passengers of the public transport system are witnessing is probably the downside of having "the highest standard of living in the world". Nobody in their right mind takes the bus unless they have to. The welfare system provides free bus-tickets to those having problems coping in the country with "the highest standard of living in the world®".
Hence the usual crowd of passengers usually consists of students, disabled people, junkies, people with mental problems...etc.
The result is that bus-centrals have become quite "interesting" places (and what can possibly be called the worst public transport system in the galaxy. The only way they could make it worse would be by replacing all the buses with a rickshaw operated by an arthritic alzheimers patient with a dicky heart).
The bus central in Reykjavik centrum is quite an unusual place for these reasons. It is one of the very few places in Reykjavik where travellers are encouraged to have their wits about them when passing by (as you always should when standing between a group of junkies who look like they could laugh off a hepatitis-C infection and a drunk having an arguement with himself).
There is a certain breed of alcoholics that inhabits the place, the one that calls the central bus stop their home. It has everything they need, across the street from the bus stop is the police station, so when they lose control, get hungry or tired, all they have to do is do is smack someone and they will be escorted across the street to sleep it off (usually they get a free meal too), this symbiotic relationship saves the police alot of work too. Another thing about this place is that probably every single religion that does "missionary" work has representatives hanging out there to "assist the unlucky ones", as well as minor political parties that need to collect signatures on petitions...etc.
It is with some sadness that I tell you that I am one of the people that relies on public transport. I live across the street from that very same bus-stop and every morning, I take the bus from there.
One day when I was on my way to work, waiting for the bus, I noticed one of the people that usually hang out there at that time handing out little pieces of paper.
This guy is quite a sight, his usual outfit consists of military camouflage clothing, a beret, pink eyeliner and high heels (the type women wear). This wouldn't be so unusual if he didn't sport that long beard. Usually he has a bottle of something awful in his hand too.
Today he was different, he was wearing a suit and no make-up, and no high heels either.
He handed me a piece of paper.
And watched me with a big smile on his face as I read it.
It read: "RELIGION & SCIENCE UNITE!" "The TRUTH!!!" "EVOLUTION IS A LIE! FIND OUT WHY!".
There was a picture of some kind of a church on it that looked like a flower, it didn't look like it was in Iceland.
I looked ap at him and asked: "And you belong to this...group?"
"Yes" he said, still smiling, showing off all three of his teeth.
"So that's why you're wearing a suit today?"
"Yes"
"Did you quit drinking?"
"Not today...Maybe later" he said.
"So what is it?" I asked.
"It's a school! They give you money!" He said and lit a cigarette.
"They give you money???"
"Yes...And books!"
"And you give them...?" I was picturing some kind of a weird ceremony thing. What would the usual bunch of minority cults want with a mentally-challenged alcoholic? Sacrifice the poor bastard to some twisted demon they had made up?
"Nothing...I just show up, listen and they give me a book" He said, grinning like he had just found the key to unlimited access to the presidents bank account.
"And they want everyone! That's why they told me to give these to everyone" He said and showed be the little pieces of paper like the one he had just handed to me.
He then went off to hand the pieces of paper to other people, while I finished reading the one he handed me.
"The origins of the universe! The Icelandic school system hides the truth from it's pupils!" it said. It had an address and a time on it too.
The note was very vague though. It had a logo I recognized, "the cross" logo ("The Cross" is a Christian extremist church)
I was curious.
The next wednesday night I put a notebook, pencil and an apple in a plastic bag and decided to go to that school and learn all the wonderful things they could teach me.
It was dark outside and snowing, and I had to walk.
A guy wearing a suit was at the entrance. I was early so I decided to linger outside for a bit and smoke a cigarette.
The guy in the suit said nothing, just watched me.
When I had finished I said "Is this the school that will unite religion and science?" "Yes" He said "Come in". "It's free, right?" I asked.
"Yes, of course" he said.
It was a small room with maybe twenty desks and chairs facing a teachers desk with a blackboard. I put the apple on the teachers desk and then found a seat at the front row of desks.
The man in the suit came in and sat down at the teachers desk.
Three teenagers entered, two girls and a boy, they looked about 16 years old. Then a shaggy looking man in his 40's entered. They all sat down at desks like I had done.
The guy in the suit introduced himself as Ragnar.
"Well, that seems to be it then...We should get started..."
A little old lady entered and sat down by a desk.
"Well...Let's get started then..." Ragnar said.
"What we are here to learn today is what the school will not teach you, the REAL story of how the world was formed."
I raised my hand.
"Yes" Ragnar said.
"Is it Ymir and Audhumla?" I asked
"Is it what?"
"Ymir and Audhumla, the giant and the cow?"
"No! Of course not!" Ragnar said.
Maybe it is time to explain a bit before I go on, about Ýmir & Auðhumla", they are persons from the pagan story of creation. I was raised in the old custom, which is the ancient pagan religion of Iceland. Although I don't really believe in the pagan version of the story of creation and I am not really "religious" or an active worshipper, I still belong to the asatru church of iceland (I believe in some things and some I don't believe in at all...it would take alot of time to explain that here&now). But I decided beforehand that I would become fiercely religious for one night, THIS night. But in short, the story goes like this: "Ymir was a giant who lived floating in the void, he lived happily just floating in the void and drinking the milk of Audhumla, a cow.
According to the story of creation, Odin, Vili and Vé killed Ymir the giant and created "earth" from his body parts.
This was something I "believed" on that night.
So...back to my story:
"So...what is it then?" I asked.
"It's necessary to know that in the beginning God created heaven and earth". He said
"No it wasn't! Everyone knows that it was Odin, Vili and Vé that did it!"
There was a long silence.
Ragnar said: "I see that you have been misled..."
"No, you have been misled! This is blasphemy!" I said (nb: there is no blasphemy in asatru).
"I'm sorry you feel that way...but surely you must know that Ymir and Audhumla are fictional characters in the Edda's!"
"So next you're going to tell me Askur and Embla weren't the first people on earth?" I said
"Well...they weren't!"
"Oh...so you're one of those nutcases that believes in evolution then?" I said angrily.
"No no...nothing like that! If you'd just listen to logic..."
"So us coming from MONKEYS is logic!?" I said.
"No...You see...Have you never heard about Adam and Eve???" He said, looking frustrated.
"Well...yes...but that's just a bunch of misguided lies" I said. "Everyone knows it was Askur and Embla! Surely you must know your HISTORY!" I said.
"Of course..."
"Or would you rather be a slave to the Danish queen?" I cut him off.
"What??? No!"
"Wait...I have to listen to this anti-indipendance blasphemous royalist garbage for two hours?!?!?" I said angrily.
"I don't see what the Danish queen has got to do with anything!" Ragnar said.
"Ah...You ignore your own history! You preach Norwegian fairytales and you don't know our story of creation! You're a royalist heretic!" I was almost shouting at Ragnar.
"No! Iceland is christian and independant! You know that!" Ragnar said.
"Hah this coming from a guy who says Audhumla is a fictional character!"
"Iceland has been Christian for a thousand YEARS!"
"And for most of that time we've had a foreign king! Heretic!"
"Yes...but we aren't anymore!" Ragnar said...He looked like he was trying to calm down.
"I won't listen to this royalist crap anymore!"
I took my apple of the table and left, I slammed the door.
Two days later I saw the guy who had handed me that piece of paper advertizing the "school". He wasn't wearing a suit anymore.
I walked up to him and told him: "Do you still go to that school you were on about the other day."
"No" he said.
"I went...It was bullshit." I said.
"I know" he replied.