NationStates Jolt Archive

Alright... so i was in the mall the other day just minding my own business when i got this Brilliant *much sarcasm intended* idea to pull the wrapper off a CD to see what color it was. This particular CD has 3 different colors and three different variations of songs. So i pulled it off and my friend Jeff was there and he told me to put it back. I agreed with him that i was a giant dumbass and we proceeded to walk out. (we were in Best Buy)

As i was walking out a large burly obviously flamingly homosexual individual thought it prudent to ask me what i was doing earlier. I said i was walking out... which is What i was doing at the time. He started telling me that I "had stolen from the wrong store" and ordered me to find the CD. I dug around for a few minutes and accientally knocked a CD off the rack. He proceeded to Freak out: this is how the dialogue went
Dumbass: whoa Whoah WHOA!
Me(dumbass yes but not the dumbass in question):relax bud
Dumbass: That's not my name
Me: Oh really. I'm sorry ...
*looks at nametag* Christopher
Dumbass formerly known as Christopher: Well i'm the manager
me: I'm sorry
Manager/Dumbass: Well I'm not!
Me: oook

So i find the Cd in the files of other cd's lying around finally and the guy tells me to get into a little room.

So i'm in the little room and the "senor Dumbass" begins to yell at me. Telling me i had stolen from the wrong store... even though i hadn't stolen anything. So he was yelling at me about that i had my foot on his desk and that i should "take my damn foot off his desk" (BTW i put my foot on his desk intentionally a few more times to get the same reaction.... it was funny to watch the vein on his head bulge in such a fashion) I said i was "going to buy the F'n CD" and then he threatened to endict me on verbal harassment charges.... (*sigh* what a dumbass)

So anyways he finally gets my ID and is like... "haha he's over 18 we'll get him on everything we can" me being the ripe old age of 20 is chuckling to himself because... what are they gonna get me on? Attempted Dumbassery with the intent to be a douche?

So anyways the Rent-a-cop finally comes into the little room and i was like... I was gonna buy the CD and the Rent a cop (who must think he's Really Bad Ass cause he's taking care of a "real criminal") reply's to me thus:

*i'm a butt fucker chuckle* Heh Heh " i may not have worked yesterday but it doesn't mean i was born yesterday"
To which i replied
"how the fuck would i have known if you worked yesterday or not?"
He just replied with his gay ass child molester chuckle and shook his head.. taking down my information.

Eventually the police come in and i talk to them privately about how i was treated by "Senor Dumbass" and they look at each other with disgust for the moron. Obviously Police officers have an IQ above 11 unlike pre noted "Senor Dumbass" and Rent-a-Cop which i will call "Ernest" (he looks like the guy from the Ernest goes to camp series... just a lot dumber and a lot more Homoerotic)

The cops asked me the following questions:
Policemen with a grain of intelligence unlike rent-a-cops:Did you have it on you?
Me: No
Policemen with a grain of intelligence unlike rent-a-cops:Did you hide it on you?
Me: No
Policemen with a grain of intelligence unlike rent-a-cops:Did you have it in your hands when they came up to you?
Me: No

1st officer to 2nd Officer: *shrug shoulders* *sigh* "Damn Rent-a-Cops cant even look at the security Videos"

Then the officers left and told "senor Dumbass" not to be a Placenta-sucking Douchebag next time something like that happens and that if they hear about it again he's in trouble

Afterwards they free'd me of all charges and i went on home laughing my ass off the entire day.

Damn i love rent-a-cops!

Oh BTW i posted this on Ubersite too.... Best website ever...

www.ubersite.com

You realize that by posting this story in the manner you did, you're constituting a punishable crime called "libel" by calling the manager and mall security such things as child molestors.

You realize that by posting this story in the manner you did, you're constituting a punishable crime called "libel" by calling the manager and mall security such things as child molestors.

I think it's only covered under libel if you used the identifiable names. As there are a lot of managers named Christopher, it'd be difficult to impossible to make the case for libel. In any case, libel's civil, not criminal.

You realize that by posting this story in the manner you did, you're constituting a punishable crime called "libel" by calling the manager and mall security such things as child molestors.

Well, technically he is only doing so if it is, in fact, the case that they are not.

And not to mention that being a Security officer myself, I take offense to the term "rent-a-cop" and the blatant generalizations.

However, the one you ran across sounds like a class act, and makes me thankful we at my place of employment are required to go through at least 40 hours of police training. He might benefit from a few extra courses...

Its not a crime if they actually ARE douchebags.

He just replied with his gay ass child molester chuckle and shook his head.. taking down my information.


Maybe my basic reading comprehension isn't up to par right now, but surely all that is being asserted here is that the fellow has a laugh which is similar to one which might belong to a "gay ass child molester", rather than the assertion that he is a "gay ass child molester"?

For the moment we will just gloss over the underlying currents of homophobia in the whole tale...

Congratulations. You're a jackass. I hope you work in retail the rest of your life, so you have to deal with pricks like yourself.

First: Dude you have not taken this nearly far enough, now is the time for you to contact a local attorney and get some legal advice. I know od at least two cases where this has happened at chain stores and the person who was illegaly detained recieved an out of court settlement from the chain store. These tools need to learn that they are not police officers and do not have the right to illegaly detain people, and that being a deptment store manager or a rent-a-cop does not make you the law, nor does it give you the right to take out the frustrations of your meaningless life on others. Call a lawyer.

Tuesday Heights : It is not libel since full names were not used. Nor was it done in sucha format as to make the persons mentioned recognizable.

Gaeltach : I have been a rent-a-cop, don't take offense at the term. Some of these guys (and I know you have met them) really are security guards only because they cannot be cops.

Sdaeriji : If you are calling the author of this piece a jackass, perhaps you should rethink it. This is a person who was wronged and is airing his anger in a manner much more healthy than going down and catching the store on fire.

Sorry, guys, but under the current situational politics in journalism, libel is now defined under the terms of merely rendering comments on a general basis. If this Christopher finds the remarks, he can sue. Simple as that.

Sorry, guys, but under the current situational politics in journalism, libel is now defined under the terms of merely rendering comments on a general basis. If this Christopher finds the remarks, he can sue. Simple as that.

He would have to be able to prove that he was the Christopher in question and he would also have to locate and prove the identity of the writer....

I think its safe to say that the original poster isn't going to be sued, unless the manager in question is on NS, proves the identity of the poster somehow, and then proves he was referring to him. Highly unlikely...

On a side note, I'm betting this CD he was looking at was a Blink182 CD. One of them came in three versions, each a different color and with different hidden tracks.

Oh, it would be hard to prove libel, I'm just pointing out that it is libel.

lol, funny story :P

You realize that by posting this story in the manner you did, you're constituting a punishable crime called "libel" by calling the manager and mall security such things as child molestors.

Whoa. Strange law. In Australia, we have defence of "truth and public interest", which would seem to apply here.

How do your journalists ever get to publish anything?

Freedom of speech??

Congratulations. You're a jackass. I hope you work in retail the rest of your life, so you have to deal with pricks like yourself.


:shock: Now THAT sounds like libel.

And "working in retail for the rest of your life" certainly sounds like cruel and unusual punishment. :lol:

Bumped, because I liked it.

Typical American stupidity.

Typical American stupidity.

Which part ? Please be specific.

Typical American stupidity.

Which part ? Please be specific.
That security guard and the manager and the thread starter.

Typical American stupidity.

Which part ? Please be specific.
That security guard and the manager and the thread starter.

I have encountered people who are overly impressed by themselves the world over. I am afraid that type of stupidity is not limited to the U.S.

Typical American stupidity.

Which part ? Please be specific.
That security guard and the manager and the thread starter.

I have encountered people who are overly impressed by themselves the world over. I am afraid that type of stupidity is not limited to the U.S.
No. But it is a very common thing there. Especially in the members of the US Amateuristic Forces I had the displeasure of meating.

Typical American stupidity.

Which part ? Please be specific.
That security guard and the manager and the thread starter.

I have encountered people who are overly impressed by themselves the world over. I am afraid that type of stupidity is not limited to the U.S.
No. But it is a very common thing there. Especially in the members of the US Amateuristic Forces I had the displeasure of meating.

to true. French psuedopolice have the same problem.

Shoot my exposure to European police sort of reminded me of a cross between the Pink Panther and the Keystone cops who just loved to harass American servicemembers,and show disdain for tourists who just wanted directions..strangely enough they'd give out tickets which would go constantly on US military paydays...

Shoot my exposure to European police sort of reminded me of a cross between the Pink Panther and the Keystone cops who just loved to harass American servicemembers,and show disdain for tourists who just wanted directions..strangely enough they'd give out tickets which would go constantly on US military paydays...
Which european police?
Hope is was not in the UK.

Shoot my exposure to European police sort of reminded me of a cross between the Pink Panther and the Keystone cops who just loved to harass American servicemembers,and show disdain for tourists who just wanted directions..strangely enough they'd give out tickets which would go constantly on US military paydays...
Which european police?
Hope is was not in the UK.

A***holes are a***holes the world over - In my view noone who wants to wear a uniform should actually be allowed to.

Obviously due to it's large population, the US will have more a***holes than anywhere else - isn't freedom of speech great?

Shoot my exposure to European police sort of reminded me of a cross between the Pink Panther and the Keystone cops who just loved to harass American servicemembers,and show disdain for tourists who just wanted directions..strangely enough they'd give out tickets which would go constantly on US military paydays...
Which european police?
Hope is was not in the UK.

No it wasn't...let me be specific...I served at Rota, Spain, and Sigonella Italy...but I also found the French, Belgian, and Dutch police to be rather disdainful of us.

Shoot my exposure to European police sort of reminded me of a cross between the Pink Panther and the Keystone cops who just loved to harass American servicemembers,and show disdain for tourists who just wanted directions..strangely enough they'd give out tickets which would go constantly on US military paydays...
Which european police?
Hope is was not in the UK.

No it wasn't...let me be specific...I served at Rota, Spain, and Sigonella Italy...but I also found the French, Belgian, and Dutch police to be rather disdainful of us.
Theres a big suprise. :roll: How can they not like you? :lol:
You should have reminded them that you saved France.