How many Jews does it take to screw in a light bulb?
SS DivisionViking
24-01-2004, 20:46
This is actually a rather complex question. in once sense the answer is 0, since a light bulb can certainly be screwed in by someone who isn't jewish, therefore technically no jews are required.
now if we are assuming that a jew is involved, in certain common circumstances the job can be done by a single individual.
there are however a number of situations in which it might require several people to successfully complete the change, as in the case of extremely large bulb, or bulbs in difficult to access areas. infact it could theoretically take dozens of individuals to mount a expedition to change a bulb in an unmanned antarctic station.
now in these multiple scenarios the issue arises are we to assume the entire team is jewish, or just a limited percentage of the group.
in the end i must concede i don't really know how many jews it takes to screw in a light bulb. :cry:
The answer to your question lies in the improbability theory, and the ratio odds.
The answer is:
1:100, 000 => (1a / 10,000) squared x 2 + a squarerooted x 100, 000b / 1a. (2 x 50,000) cubed = c. c x 100,000a x (bc) = d.
:?:
It takes at least two jews to screw in a lightbulb.
But how they got into the lightbulb is anybody's guess. http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0903/grinser/grinning-smiley-047.gif
SS DivisionViking
24-01-2004, 21:18
It takes at least two jews to screw in a lightbulb.
But how they got into the lightbulb is anybody's guess. http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0903/grinser/grinning-smiley-047.gif
no cuz there could be screwing with a jew and a gentile or two gentiles. :wink:
Johnistan
24-01-2004, 21:18
This kid once told me this joke.
How many Jews are needed to screw in a lightbulb?
How many?
6 million, one to screw in the lightbulb, and 5,999,999 to get killed my Hitler!!!
I'm Jewish...
Oh shit
I kicked him in the balls.
This kid once told me this joke.
How many Jews are needed to screw in a lightbulb?
How many?
6 million, one to screw in the lightbulb, and 5,999,999 to get killed my Hitler!!!
I'm Jewish...
Oh shit
I kicked him in the balls.
YAY!! :D
TerraGaia
24-01-2004, 21:21
wtf
Johnistan
24-01-2004, 21:21
Damn straight
SS DivisionViking
24-01-2004, 21:22
This kid once told me this joke.
How many Jews are needed to screw in a lightbulb?
How many?
6 million, one to screw in the lightbulb, and 5,999,999 to get killed my Hitler!!!
I'm Jewish...
Oh shit
I kicked him in the balls.
YAY!! :D
that's what i like about the internet, cuts the beat downs i get for saying obnoxious things down to a minimum.
How many politicians does it take to screw in a light-bulb?
None. The politicians just holds iit up and while the whole world revolves around him.
Alluhaland
24-01-2004, 21:31
Someone lock this thread its offensive...
Poles n Other Nations
24-01-2004, 21:33
How many light bulbs do you need to change a president.
Only one, but filled with napalm.
This kid once told me this joke.
How many Jews are needed to screw in a lightbulb?
How many?
6 million, one to screw in the lightbulb, and 5,999,999 to get killed my Hitler!!!
I'm Jewish...
Oh shit
I kicked him in the balls.
YAY!! :D
that's what i like about the internet, cuts the beat downs i get for saying obnoxious things down to a minimum.
For now. I'm trying to invent an internet taser. *nod*
Lopikland
24-01-2004, 22:46
MODALERT
Lock and/or delete this please! I am from a Jewish family and this is NOT funny. It is offensive and demeaning.
MODALERT
Lock and/or delete this please! I am from a Jewish family and this is NOT funny. It is offensive and demeaning.
You're kidding, right?
How many right-Libertarians does it take to change a light-bulb?
Nope, if it needed changing the market would do it.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Pìg!ome, g||xòfùme.-I am a human, not a tool.
No Mods, No Masters!
http://www.sulucas.com/images/steatopygia.jpg
I'm male. Note the pic of attractive women.
Some Jewish Lightbulb Jokes... from the Treasury of Jewish Humor:
How many Lubavitchers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Three- one to screw it in and two to convince everybody else to do it, too
How many Satmarers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Two- one to screw it in and one to denounce it as a Zionist plot.
How many Breslovers does it take to screw in a light bulb?
None, because they know they’ll never find as good a one as a first one.
How many Zionists does it take to screw in a light bulb?
Four- one to stay home and convince someone else to do it, a second to donate the light bulb, a third to screw it in, and a fourth to proclaim that the entire Jewish people stands behind their actions.
Tuesday Heights
25-01-2004, 03:38
It takes at least two jews to screw in a lightbulb.
But how they got into the lightbulb is anybody's guess. http://www.click-smilies.de/sammlung0903/grinser/grinning-smiley-047.gif
LOL.
Tumaniaa
25-01-2004, 03:53
How many surrealists does it take to screw in a lightbulb?
Three...One to screw in the lightbulb, one to fill the bathtub with apples and one to set fire to the bowler-hat.
How many offensive posts does it take a thread in a politically correct society to get closed?
One!
The Underground City
25-01-2004, 04:15
How many light bulbs do you need to change a president.
Only one, but filled with napalm.
:lol:
MODALERT
Lock and/or delete this please! I am from a Jewish family and this is NOT funny. It is offensive and demeaning.
You're kidding, right?
Kidding or dumb, one or the other.
The Edwardian Empire
25-01-2004, 04:37
MODALERT
Lock and/or delete this please! I am from a Jewish family and this is NOT funny. It is offensive and demeaning.
You're kidding, right?
Kidding or dumb, one or the other.
I'm inclined to agree with Zeltec and Trolls.
Neutered Sputniks
25-01-2004, 05:11
Guys/gals, keep to the spirit of the original post please....
The Underground City
25-01-2004, 05:13
Guys/gals, keep to the spirit of the original post please....
Um...what spirit?
Neutered Sputniks
25-01-2004, 05:15
The original post was not a derogatory joke. Nor was it dirty. In other words, knock off the offensive crap.
Spookistan and Jakalah
25-01-2004, 05:17
It takes one Jew. Screwing in a lightbulb is a simple household chore.
MODALERT
Lock and/or delete this please! I am from a Jewish family and this is NOT funny. It is offensive and demeaning.
AND? >Life is brutal< If you can't stand being offended once in a while, then just go to the desert and die.
MODALERT
Lock and/or delete this please! I am from a Jewish family and this is NOT funny. It is offensive and demeaning.
AND? >Life is brutal< If you can't stand being offended once in a while, then just go to the desert and die.
How many months does it take for a thread to be bumped....
Anyhoo, does anyone know where Lunatic Goofballs is?