Charlotte Ryberg
26-12-2008, 15:12
The World Assembly,
SERIOUSLY ANNOYED that once again the Ambassadors to Charlotte Ryberg have received unwanted Christmas presents from long lost relatives: those with annoying little elves on it or something like that;
ADMITTING that I wouldn't have been that annoyed if these rubbish presents actually had some value to be sold on eBay, but confirms that these presents are indeed dead worthless, something that no one in any real or fantasy universe will want at any time;
DECLARES rubbish presents to be just as bad as SpySheriff (that annoying rogue software for those who don't know already, wankers)
FURTHERMORE, among these prezzies, Why do I get these video games that require internet activation and only allowing five installations? Oh, it's those EA goons and their SecuROM crap, right? Listen to me you, when I get the hands on you I want to know why you think putting these copy-protection crap on will not affect your customer's enjoyment. No wonder why your SecuROM infested crap are getting one-star reviews on Amazon.
DECLARES SecuROM as über-idiots, and hopes that gamers boycott their titles enough to force EA to crawl back into the sensible world of SafeDisc.
HARRUMPHING, the WA hereby:
INSTITUTES two types of Christmas presents:
- Presents that I actually want;
- Those whatsits I don't want;
MANDATES that the two types of presents must be delivered separately of each other with distinguishable wrapping so I can tell the best out of the rest. Anyone sending presents that I may not like must be sure that it can be sold for cold hard cash on eBay without risking negative feedback, or forever be blacklisted by Santa when he delivers his rounds next year.
FORCES PC games to have serial numbers and sensible copy protection like SafeDisc and not that SecuROM crap, just like the new Auran Trainz simulator I had to buy instead of receiving it as a present! That includes you, EA. And while we're at it EA will be forced to make their games totally customizable so we don't have waste time tiring out the good guys behind the Sims 2 editor program SimPE too often when we could have created hobble-skirts of Yves Saint Laurent quality for Antje, and saving her from that annoying Rod Humble. That's right, I'm onto you, Will Wright. Failure of EA to comply will result in the forced sell-off of the Sims franchise and you to Ubisoft (the makers of that DRM-sensible Prince of Persia), since the Sims 2 is the only series we buy from EA instead of settling for Minesweeper anyway.
FORCES you bloody video game publishers all over the world to accept a sensible standard for computer games: A DVD or two that's factory-pressed without that SecuROM crap, and then you have a book with instructions which we call a manual, and another piece of paper called a quick-reference card. Serial numbers are optional. now I know that's a bit complex but you'll get used to it because what's more important is games were not designed to break half of the world's total of computers in use for crying out loud: plus it'll cut down on piracy further.
RANDOMLY kicking in the nuts those who gave me rubbish presents for thinking that it would have been of any use in Summer: quite frankly it destined for another eleven months in the dark attic... only if it could be sold on eBay earlier.
Cheers, Cobdenia for the inspiration: Christmas is probably the WORST holiday I have to go through if you can probe my mind!
NOW if you excuse me, I've got to spoil Antje and Petra back at her mansion and make the Goth's lives a total hell (for letting Bella run away to the Brokes) in the Cyprus neighbourhood. At least they were the titles that didn't need activation.
Those who take this resolution seriously will be sent to Woolies to buy me Pick 'n Mixes before they shut down for good.
SERIOUSLY ANNOYED that once again the Ambassadors to Charlotte Ryberg have received unwanted Christmas presents from long lost relatives: those with annoying little elves on it or something like that;
ADMITTING that I wouldn't have been that annoyed if these rubbish presents actually had some value to be sold on eBay, but confirms that these presents are indeed dead worthless, something that no one in any real or fantasy universe will want at any time;
DECLARES rubbish presents to be just as bad as SpySheriff (that annoying rogue software for those who don't know already, wankers)
FURTHERMORE, among these prezzies, Why do I get these video games that require internet activation and only allowing five installations? Oh, it's those EA goons and their SecuROM crap, right? Listen to me you, when I get the hands on you I want to know why you think putting these copy-protection crap on will not affect your customer's enjoyment. No wonder why your SecuROM infested crap are getting one-star reviews on Amazon.
DECLARES SecuROM as über-idiots, and hopes that gamers boycott their titles enough to force EA to crawl back into the sensible world of SafeDisc.
HARRUMPHING, the WA hereby:
INSTITUTES two types of Christmas presents:
- Presents that I actually want;
- Those whatsits I don't want;
MANDATES that the two types of presents must be delivered separately of each other with distinguishable wrapping so I can tell the best out of the rest. Anyone sending presents that I may not like must be sure that it can be sold for cold hard cash on eBay without risking negative feedback, or forever be blacklisted by Santa when he delivers his rounds next year.
FORCES PC games to have serial numbers and sensible copy protection like SafeDisc and not that SecuROM crap, just like the new Auran Trainz simulator I had to buy instead of receiving it as a present! That includes you, EA. And while we're at it EA will be forced to make their games totally customizable so we don't have waste time tiring out the good guys behind the Sims 2 editor program SimPE too often when we could have created hobble-skirts of Yves Saint Laurent quality for Antje, and saving her from that annoying Rod Humble. That's right, I'm onto you, Will Wright. Failure of EA to comply will result in the forced sell-off of the Sims franchise and you to Ubisoft (the makers of that DRM-sensible Prince of Persia), since the Sims 2 is the only series we buy from EA instead of settling for Minesweeper anyway.
FORCES you bloody video game publishers all over the world to accept a sensible standard for computer games: A DVD or two that's factory-pressed without that SecuROM crap, and then you have a book with instructions which we call a manual, and another piece of paper called a quick-reference card. Serial numbers are optional. now I know that's a bit complex but you'll get used to it because what's more important is games were not designed to break half of the world's total of computers in use for crying out loud: plus it'll cut down on piracy further.
RANDOMLY kicking in the nuts those who gave me rubbish presents for thinking that it would have been of any use in Summer: quite frankly it destined for another eleven months in the dark attic... only if it could be sold on eBay earlier.
Cheers, Cobdenia for the inspiration: Christmas is probably the WORST holiday I have to go through if you can probe my mind!
NOW if you excuse me, I've got to spoil Antje and Petra back at her mansion and make the Goth's lives a total hell (for letting Bella run away to the Brokes) in the Cyprus neighbourhood. At least they were the titles that didn't need activation.
Those who take this resolution seriously will be sent to Woolies to buy me Pick 'n Mixes before they shut down for good.