NationStates Jolt Archive

The following is the version that has reached quorum. We'd again like to thank both Quintessence of Dust and Yelda for feedback and input.


Water Quality and Conservation
A resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment, at the expense of industry.
Category: Environmental || Industry Affected: All Businesses || Proposed by: Rubina

Description: The United Nations,

Acknowledging the essential nature of water for general economic use and personal needs, including drinking, bathing, sanitation, and food preparation;

Noting that many water sources (e.g., rivers, aquifers, and glaciers), and the water from those sources, cross multiple national boundaries, making water a shared resource among nations;

Concerned that the quality and availability of water for all is highly dependent on actions within individual nations;

1. DEFINES clean water as water reasonably free of pollutants and able to robustly support biodiversity of native aquatic species;

2. PLEDGES itself to the complementary goals of clean water and water conservation;

3. REQUIRES members to take steps to improve general water quality, appropriate to its various uses, including but not limited to restricting introduction of chemical or biological contaminants into water resources as a result of personal, industrial or agricultural uses;

4. DEFINES waste water as a mixture of water and dissolved or suspended solid or liquid contaminants discharged from sources such as, but not limited to, domestic residences, commercial properties, industrial or agricultural operations.

5. MANDATES processing waste water to remove contaminants and disinfect the effluent prior to discharge at any location that would bring it into contact with another water source or subwatershed which provides potable water within its boundaries.

6. REQUIRES nations to institute effective water conservation policies and techniques to maximize use and benefit of available water resources, including measures to be taken by individuals, as well as, those applicable to commercial use, such as reclamation of water used in manufacturing and cooling;

7. URGES the formation of regional consortia to examine and implement water quality and conservation policy and to provide management for regionally shared water resources;

8. ENCOURAGES nations to reduce pressure on water resources through long-range water supply forecasting, water planning and management, and policy decisions in pertinent areas, such as establishing water rights and priorities, urban development policies, and water banks;

9. STRONGLY ENCOURAGES nations to ensure persons' access to clean water in sufficient quantities to meet their daily needs for sustenance;

10. TASKS the UN Environmental Agency, established under UNR 217, with the following specific activities with respect to water issues:

a. Provide general, technical and educational assistance to nations in the development and implementation of water quality improvements, conservation techniques and management plans, identification of new water resources, and development of water-use auditing systems;

b. Produce annual water quality profiles for each member nation, adjusting for unique geology, biology and water resources concerns, and including non-binding potability and contaminant reduction goals;

c. Arrange aid in the form of low or no-interest loans to nations who lack sufficient local funding for emergency remediation in either water quality or availability issues.

11. ENCOURAGES members to work with non-member nations in cooperative projects to improve regional water quality, conservation and access.

12. AFFIRMS that nothing herein requires relinquishment of riparian or water rights, whether individually, communally, or state owned.

* We reserve the right to fully ignore any comment that amounts to no more than "ur in my nation, stealin' my sovereignty."

Ben Whitehorse
Special Ambassador for Environmental Concerns
Rubina

Just a little bit of reformatting to make it easier for most people to read.

2. Requires members to take steps to improve general water quality, appropriate to its various uses, including but not limited to restricting introduction of chemical and/or biological contaminants into water resources as a result of personal, industrial or agricultural uses;

3. Mandates tertiary processing of waste water prior to its discharge into any location that would bring it into contact with another water source (above or below ground).
a. "Waste water" is defined as water discharged from domestic residences, commercial properties, industry or agricultural operations that is a mixture of water and dissolved or suspended solid or liquid contaminants.
b. "Tertiary processing" is defined as those water treatment processes that may include chemical removal of specific contaminants and disinfection of the effluent;
That's all I have for now. I like this idea. I hope this one goes well for you.

If you don't solicit Mikitivity's advice on any proposal related to water quality, be prepared to eat your own head once he sees it and responds. He's a bit ... manic ... on this subject.

Well what fun would it be around here without a few manic thread responses? :D

In all seriousness though...I'm sure he won't be too manic...this one is fairly well written already.

... be prepared to eat your own head once he sees it and responds. He's a bit ... manic ... on this subject.Do you have condiment suggestion for that? :D

It's been up for over a month on an off-site that he indicated he'd be following, but I'll try to track him down for a heads-up.

ur in my nation, stealin' my sovereignty

























You know someone had to say it.:p

Bob Flibble
NSO Mafia Don

ur in my nation, stealin' my sovereignty

I agree. But I think our water's fine. And if it's not, oh well. It should be okay, since it's desalinated water from the ocean.

~Dr. Jules Hodz
NSO Member

My right to water draft might provide some ideas. Let me dig it out.

My right to water draft might provide some ideas. Let me dig it out.
I believe it was already referenced in off-site drafting dear. :)

I believe it was already referenced in off-site drafting dear. :)Oh, well that makes it easier for me :D

Zyrwick neither opposes or supports this resolution at this time. We would like to see it hit the debating floor. As We understand, all life requires water for biological processes in the very least, and science has proved that water does cycle globally (and potentially gallacticly). So this just might be an issue worthy of UN interference.

Although there is one question I do have....How is this going to be paid for?

Alexei Gramiko
Zyrwickian UN Ambassador

Although there is one question I do have....How is this going to be paid for?
The specter of this (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=527018) still haunts us... again.

Will this pop up every time we draft a resolution?

Kyle di Fontana
Just an eighteen-year-old guy working at the Nord-Brutlandese UN Mission

The specter of this (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=527018) still haunts us... again.

Will this pop up every time we draft a resolution?

Kyle di Fontana
Just an eighteen-year-old guy working at the Nord-Brutlandese UN Mission

Actually it most likely will. As I understand the current law the UN is not allowed to tax UN members, therefore where is this new UN body going to get the funds to distribute to other nations for improvements in their water distribution/treatment systems?

We feel that while water quality is indeed an international issue (one of a very very very small number of international issues) we feel that this would be better handled on the national and regional levels in requard to creating water safety standards.

This is why I would like to see debate on this issue on the floor.

Also we would fully support this measure if section 8 were removed in its entirety.

Actually it most likely will. As I understand the current law the UN is not allowed to tax UN members,
I disagree, honoured ambassador. The UN is not allowed to directly tax the citizens of its member nations.

Benedictions,

This is why I would like to see debate on this issue on the floor.
Agreed. I would tell Madame Ambassador about this. It's one of those well-written resolutions currently pending.

Kyle di Fontana
Just an eighteen-year-old guy working at the Nord-Brutlandese UN Mission

Although there is one question I do have....How is this going to be paid for?

The specter of this (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=527018) still haunts us... again.

Will this pop up every time we draft a resolution?

By my reading of past debates, that question frequently popped up long before the UN Funding Act was ever drafted. Why? Because it's a damned good question. The proposal here does a lot of mandating that member states do this and that, without any means of funding them. In other words, the member states will have to pay for them. However, it also tries to provide a way out of these unfunded mandates by creating the UN Environmental Commission, which will "provide aid in the form of low or no-interest loans to nations needing immediate remediation in either water quality or availability issues, who lack sufficient local funding for said projects." Okay, so if you can't afford it, the UN will give you the money, but you'll have to pay it back -- at some point (and only if you feel like it, since there's no real way to force repayment). Again, though, who pays for this? UN member states, since the that's where the UN gets its money.

I have to add that I'm also a bit leery about the creation of the UNEC. I shudder at the thought of what other responsibilities might be tossed its way.

Ailyn Vel (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/images/Ailyn.jpg)
New Vandalian Ambassador to the UN

I think our water's fine. And if it's not, oh well.It is truth that "your" water is also our water. It is not a matter of "oh well".

My right to water draft might provide some ideas. Let me dig it out.Ithania is correct (one participant had your permission for use), and we thank you very much.

... we feel that this would be better handled on the national and regional levels in requard to creating water safety standards.There is good news for all here then. The water quality goals provided by the UNEC to each nation are non-binding and are there for your national and regional entities to incorporate as they are capable. Although they will be publicly available, so your citizens (well, perhaps not your citizens) and the world will have access to them).


Ben Whitehorse
Special Ambassador for Environmental Concerns

It is truth that "your" water is also our water. It is not a matter of "oh well".

OOC: It is a great pun, though.

OOC: Indeed. :D Special Amb. Whitehorse isn't known for his sense of humor. ;)

I believe this would meet with my government's approval as is, but I'd have less of a problem selling them if the UN Environmental Commission was renamed the UN Water Commission.

The environmental moniker can be used to widen the scope fo the commissions power. The Resolution is the protection of water which in itself is vital, but a commission controlling global environmental issues is a ball game of a different color.

I don't believe this to be a deal breaker but the name change may grease the skids a little.

Javier Parez Dequar
UN Ambassador at Large
The United States of Philimbesi

On the committee: having a UN Environmental Commission was my idea. The aim was to reduce the number of committees: instead of having a new one set up every time an environmental resolution passes (the WWPT, the UNCoESB, the [now defunct] whaling commission, etc.) we could just have one, and future resolutions could make use of it (much like the UN Free Trade Commission, for free trade resolutions). Given the UN is currently obsessed with funding, having one committee that could mitigate the need for several seemed a good idea. And remember, its duties can only be expanded by a future resolution passing; the committee cannot magically endow itself with extra powers.

-- Samantha Benson
Acting Chair, The Green Think Tank (http://z13.invisionfree.com/Green_Think_Tank)

However, Zyrwickian UN Mission will refrain from either supporting or opposing it prior to a vote of the Politburo of the People's Communist Party of Zyrwick. Although we would still prefer section 8 removed.

Failing that, renaming the commission/committee the "United Nations Committee on Water Conservation" or something to that effect would be an acceptable compromise.

Our People's Communist Party fears the potential abuse of a broad ranging environmental commission and feel that any commission created by a proposal such as this should be limited in scope.

Alexei Gramiko
Zerwickian UN Ambassador.

Just a little bit of reformatting to make it easier for most people to read.For not responding to this earlier, my apologies, ma'am. I know that the and/or construction is frequently used, however, it isn't necessary. The presence of either type of contaminant decreases water quality without regard to whether or not the other type of contaminant is present. "And/or" also introduces imprecision at a critical place in the proposal and my ancestors would swat me from sun-up to sundown for it.

... we would still prefer section 8 removed.

Failing that, renaming the commission/committee the "United Nations Committee on Water Conservation" or something to that effect would be an acceptable compromise.

Our People's Communist Party fears the potential abuse of a broad ranging environmental commissionThere is no chance of section 8 being removed.

Ms. Benson has already addressed your concern, but I'll repeat it here. The only "abuse" of the committee would be at the direction of the General Assembly. Committee functions are limited to those assigned by a majority of the members. You fear yourself.

Ben Whitehorse
Special Ambassador for Environmental Concerns

Ambassador Whitehorse,

You of all people must realize that when it comes to enviromental issues that they are each diverse and require different solutions. While one thing may be good for water conservation can the same set of solutions be used in reguard to forests, storing nuclear waste etc?

The People's Communist Party of Zyrwick fears that future legislation would increase the responsiblities of the commission beyond their area of expertise. And by doing so could actually harm the enviroments of UN nations.

We understand and recognize that the NSUN is the perfect place to draft legislation to solve one problem and yet create ten more. Unintended consequenses happen to be a trade mark of some nations.

However, after the deliberation of the Politburo, and the support of General Secretary Ulyanov, our delegation is prepared to vote in favor should this proposal hit the floor.

Alexei Gramiko
Zyrwickian UN Ambassador.

The People's Communist Party of Zyrwick fears that future legislation would increase the responsiblities of the commission beyond their area of expertise.

The People's Communist Party of Zyrwick clearly needs to be educated on the nature and membership of UN committees and commissions. They are experts in the field or fields that the committee covers. Top experts. Pay no attention to the Ark of the Covenant behind the curtain.

The People's Communist Party of Zyrwick clearly needs to be educated on the nature and membership of UN committees and commissions. They are experts in the field or fields that the committee covers. Top experts. Pay no attention to the Ark of the Covenant behind the curtain.

Of course they are. They'd never just be brainless bureaucrats, would they?

Ailyn Vel (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Image:Ailyn.jpg)
New Vandalian Ambassador to the UN

Of course they are. They'd never just be brainless bureaucrats, would they?

Ailyn Vel (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Image:Ailyn.jpg)
New Vandalian Ambassador to the UN

Of course not, that's what the General Assembly is for.:D

Timothy Schmidt
Bob Flibble's PA

OOC: Sorry I've been absent, but I was in Europe for the past few weeks. :)

Noting that many water sources (e.g., rivers, aquifers, watersheds), and the water from those sources, cross multiple national boundaries, making water a shared resource among nations;

If you have room, I'd suggest adding "glaciers" to water sources. This is a significant source of fresh water in both RL and in some NS nations such as mine. :) A more difficult resource would be actual atmospheric sources, which you could address by simply rewriting that little part to read:

(e.g., rivers, aquifers, glaciers, and the atmosphere)

A watershed isn't exactly a source of water, but a region that is defined by its common source. I've also purposefully neglected the thin layer of soil that isn't really an "aquifer" in the traditional sense, but ultimately one of the more important sources of water, because you really are focusing on sources that cross international boundaries. :)

I'll continue to read and reply. But my initial thought is that this is very well written.

I'm still thinking about clauses 2 and 3, but I like 1, 4, & 6.

6. Encourages nations to reduce pressure on water resources through planning, water management, and policy decisions in pertinent areas, such as population density and urban development;

Here you may want to include a reference to agriculture as well, as agricultural is an important domestic industry that most nations (even US states) seek to protect. It also affords us the unique opportunity to fallow ag land during extended dry periods, thereby trading ag water for cash to other water users that have "hard" demands (urban drinking water and industrial use).

I'd do this by just saying, "such as establishing water rights and priorities, urban development policies, and water banks". I've significantly changed your clause with this amendment. I'd also suggest considering an addition to long-range water supply forecasting, which is the key that drives the rest of the water planning and management engine.

OOC: Sorry I've been absent, but I was in Europe for the past few weeks. :)OOC: As long as you bring a note from your mom.... :D

IC: Your comments to date have generated much thought. I thank you for your time and effort.

Ben Whitehorse,
Special Ambassador for Environmental Affairs

Why not just leave water up to private companies, and local governments? This would be far more cost effective.

OOC: As long as you bring a note from your mom.... :D


What about a bill from my credit card company? ;) Sadly the US Dollar has been incredibly weak as of late.

Why not just leave water up to private companies, and local governments? This would be far more cost effective.
This proposal has nothing to do with who deals with water. Its all about the how. Though of course it would be the government, as the member, who would be held to account by the UN for breaching the resolution if they haven't got their contracts written correctly :-)

Thank you, Mikitivity, for your comments...

If you have room, I'd suggest adding "glaciers" to water sources. This is a significant source of fresh water in both RL and in some NS nations such as mine. :) A more difficult resource would be actual atmospheric sources, which you could address by simply rewriting that little part to read:

(e.g., rivers, aquifers, glaciers, and the atmosphere)Room is tight, but you are right; the ice flows are both significant and international.

"Atmosphere" ...hmmm. As correct as the inclusion would be, I believe that for too many people, it would decrease the focus of the proposal. In addition, none of the active clauses addresses the interplay between air quality and water quality. Given word-count limitations, I'm not confident that that issue could be adequately addressed within this proposal.

A watershed isn't exactly a source of water....Agreed, though what happens within the watershed affects the quality of water... perhaps if it is removed from the examples of water sources and placed in the clause dealing with release of treated water.

...Here you may want to include a reference to agriculture as well, as agricultural is an important domestic industry that most nations (even US states) seek to protect. It also affords us the unique opportunity to fallow ag land during extended dry periods, thereby trading ag water for cash to other water users that have "hard" demands (urban drinking water and industrial use).

I'd do this by just saying, "such as establishing water rights and priorities, urban development policies, and water banks". I've significantly changed your clause with this amendment. I'd also suggest considering an addition to long-range water supply forecasting, which is the key that drives the rest of the water planning and management engine.Long-range planning (or at least research into...) is included in clause 8, but we agree belongs here as well from the perspective of what governments can do.

So...
[preamble] Noting that many water sources (e.g., rivers, aquifers, and glaciers), and the water from those sources, cross multiple national boundaries, making water a shared resource among nations;

3. Mandates tertiary processing of waste water prior to its discharge into any location that would bring it into contact with another water source (above or below ground) or watershed..... [etc. etc. with no other changes]

6. Encourages nations to reduce pressure on water resources through long-range water supply forecasting, water planning and management, and policy decisions in pertinent areas, such as establishing water rights and priorities, urban development policies, and water banks;
I will wait to update the OP version for a bit as I'll have to whittle away a few words to come in under the limit.

May the wind blow free,

Ben Whitehorse,
Special Ambassador for Environmental Affairs

The aim was to reduce the number of committees: instead of having a new one set up every time an environmental resolution passes (the WWPT, the UNCoESB, the [now defunct] whaling commission, etc.) we could just have one, and future resolutions could make use of it (much like the UN Free Trade Commission, for free trade resolutions).

Than the creation of that committee should be submitted as a resolution for the general assembly to vote upon. Tacking it to the middle of a clean water act is disingenuous at best and I'm not certain should pass the smell test!

I will go on the record saying that USP thinks such a committee is in the best interest of all involved, however would like to see a full resolution defining the scope and breadth of the committees work, information as to exactly what existing committee's would be joined in to etc, etc.

Unfortunately as is with this misdirection in place The United States of Philimbesi would be forced to deny such a resolution.

Javar Parez Dequar
UN Ambassador At Large
The United States of PhilImbesi

Than the creation of that committee should be submitted as a resolution for the general assembly to vote upon. Tacking it to the middle of a clean water act is disingenuous at best and I'm not certain should pass the smell test!
I'm not entirely certain that a resolution that just set up a committee and didn't give it anything to do would be legal. It would certainly be ridiculed. Given the way the committee rules work, there's no particular reason not to create the committee here.

"Atmosphere" ...hmmm. As correct as the inclusion would be, I believe that for too many people, it would decrease the focus of the proposal. In addition, none of the active clauses addresses the interplay between air quality and water quality. Given word-count limitations, I'm not confident that that issue could be adequately addressed within this proposal.


Actually I was really not concerned about atmospheric quality nor the quality of direct runoff in mountain watersheds, but rather tossed atmosphere out there to prevent nations from cloud seeding at the determent of their neighbors. However, acid rain is a direct result of the burning of "dirty coals" ... and has been a huge problem for RL Norway. What good is their runoff if the British taint it before it falls from the clouds.

The other reason to include atmosphere is forecasting activities will have to start. Water quality is always a function of the watersheds the water passes through (in its liquid and gaseous forms) and also a function of the quantity of that water -- in high flow conditions, the same amount of waste water will be diluted. :) I remember a year and a half a ago when we were in the middle of some floods and I was patrolling the levees ... when I returned to my office, some local urban water supply groups wanted me to track a waste water overflow (spill) at a local treatment plant. I told them it would be like finding a needle in a haystack. That said, flood waters have their own sediment loads that prevent them from being ideal water supplies.

As for the resolution, I will not complain if any of these sorts of details do not make it into the resolution. I do agree that space is important, so limiting these points to the debate as a "Yes, we considered that ..." is perfect in my book. :)

That translates to, you have my support.

Ben Whitehorse quickly enters the Green Think Tank conference room with a tall stack of papers and books.

How was everyone else's vacation? Pointing to the stack of reading, he laughs, Mine was absolutely delightful.

Those of you here are obviously interested, so let's get to it. First, I want to thank Sam Benson of Quintessence of Dust for her willingness to read draft after draft, offer good-natured criticism and provide solid suggestions. Copies of the most recent version of "Water Quality and Conservation" are available here for you to take back to your offices.
Water Quality and Conservation
Category: Environmental || Businesses Affected: All

The United Nations,

Acknowledging the essential nature of water for general economic use and personal needs, including drinking, bathing, sanitation, and food preparation;

Noting that many water sources (e.g., rivers, aquifers, and glaciers), and the water from those sources, cross multiple national boundaries, making water a shared resource among nations;

Concerned that the quality and availability of water for all is highly dependent on actions within individual nations;

1. DEFINES clean water as water reasonably free of pollutants and able to support robustly biodiversity of native aquatic species;

2. PLEDGES itself to the complementary goals of clean water and water conservation;

3. REQUIRES members to take steps to improve general water quality, appropriate to its various uses, including but not limited to restricting introduction of chemical or biological contaminants into water resources as a result of personal, industrial or agricultural uses;

4. DEFINES waste water as a mixture of water and dissolved or suspended solid or liquid contaminants discharged from sources such as, but not limited to, domestic residences, commercial properties, industrial or agricultural operations.

5. MANDATES processing waste water to remove contaminants and disinfect the effluent prior to discharge at any location that would bring it into contact with another water source or subwatershed which provides potable water within its boundaries.

6. REQUIRES nations to institute effective water conservation policies and techniques to maximize use and benefit of available water resources, including measures to be taken by individuals, as well as, those applicable to commercial use, such as reclamation of water used in manufacturing and cooling;

7. URGES the formation of regional consortia to examine and implement water quality and conservation policy and to provide management for regionally shared water resources;

8. ENCOURAGES nations to reduce pressure on water resources through long-range water supply forecasting, water planning and management, and policy decisions in pertinent areas, such as establishing water rights and priorities, urban development policies, and water banks;

9. STRONGLY ENCOURAGES nations to ensure persons' access to clean water in sufficient quantities to meet their daily needs for sustenance;

10. TASKS the UN Environmental Agency, established under UNR 217, with the following specific activities with respect to water issues:

a. Provide general, technical and educational assistance to nations in the development and implementation of water quality improvements, conservation techniques and management plans, identification of new water resources, and development of water-use auditing systems;

b. Produce annual water quality profiles for each member nation, adjusting for unique geology, biology and water resources concerns, and including non-binding potability and contaminant reduction goals;

c. Arrange aid in the form of low or no-interest loans to nations who lack sufficient local funding for emergency remediation in either water quality or availability issues.

11. ENCOURAGES members to work with non-member nations in cooperative projects to improve regional water quality, conservation and access.

12. AFFIRMS that nothing herein requires relinquishment of riparian or water rights, whether individually, communally, or state owned.

Any comments or concerns are welcome.

Ben Whitehorse
Special Ambassador for Environmental Affairs
Rubinan Representative to the Green Think Tank

Seems a little weak, actually. Enviro:All Business is similar to a Strong Proposal, so it's needs to have teeth.

Seems a little weak in what way? There are three major articles that would require widespread commitment of funds by both industry and governments. Would stronger language in those three be sufficient to make the proposal meet category/strength requirements?

Are there other alternatives? A way to write a "significant" but not industry-specific environmental resolution?

There are three major articles that would require widespread commitment of funds by both industry and governments.Missed those. Exhaustion and skimming doesn't contribute to reading comprehension.


Are there other alternatives? A way to write a "significant" but not industry-specific environmental resolution?No, there isn't, but I think you're okay here after all. I missed your REQUIRES clauses.

Missed those. Exhaustion and skimming doesn't contribute to reading comprehension.

No, there isn't, but I think you're okay here after all. I missed your REQUIRES clauses.Whew. Thanks for the double-check.

Now get some rest. /mother-hen. :)

So far I support this resolution, but I have a question. I haven't been able to look over the entire debate, but if this resolution passes does it still allow a nation to supplement a water source with fluoride? Because if it doesn't I think it should. I don't think it should force people to include fluoride in their water, but they should be allowed to do it if they want to.

The People's Republic of Opendia

So far I support this resolution, but I have a question. I haven't been able to look over the entire debate, but if this resolution passes does it still allow a nation to supplement a water source with fluoride? Because if it doesn't I think it should. I don't think it should force people to include fluoride in their water, but they should be allowed to do it if they want to.

The People's Republic of Opendia

I don't believe that Fluoridation is required or forbidden under the terms of this agreement, as the use of the phrase Clause 3 "appropriate to its various uses" would allow member states to Fluoridate or not depending on whether or not they regarded a Public Dental Health Initiative as a water use issue.

At least that is my interpretation.

The People's Republic of Staffsilvania.

I don't believe that Fluoridation is required or forbidden under the terms of this agreement, as the use of the phrase Clause 3 "appropriate to its various uses" would allow member states to Fluoridate or not...At least that is my interpretation.Yes, that is correct.

The proposal is strictly silent about the addition of fluoride to public drinking water. However, in addition to the phrasing Staffsilvania mentions that would allow fluoridation, note that "restrict" (in the same clause) means to "to keep or confine within limits", thus the addition of fluoride, even though technically a chemical contaminant, would not be prohibited.

Ben Whitehorse
Special Ambassador for Environmental Affairs
Rubinan Representative to the Green Think Tank

The PRESIDING OFFICER. Having attained the necessary 122 proposals, the proposal "Water Quality and Conservation" has reached quorum and is now in the queue.

The representative from Goobergunchia is recognized.

Mr. KARETH. For the record, the proposal in question now has 135 approvals.

Mr. FUNKEL. Ben, give me my micropho---

The PRESIDING OFFICER. Who seeks recognition?

Does the UN plan on paying for these reforms? If not::upyours:

Does the nation of Even Flow plan on paying for the benefits they currently enjoy from UN membership? The Fine Old Yeldan Pickle Barrel TM near the entrance to this hallway is always open for donations.

Rubina, this is up for vote next. Do you want to use this thread or make a new one?

OOC: Rubina said she would be away this weekend, but will be back by Monday, I believe. I think she would be fine with using this thread, given there have been very few substantive changes over the course of it.

The POTF supports any idea that would benifent the enviroment. This one help it and increases international coporation. We suport this and have voted for it.

I fully support this proposal, but in my case, how would the UN clean up the water near Chernobyl?

That would take decades to fully clean and purify the water, and me and my government are not willing to pay the extra hundreds of millions of dollars just to clean up water, when we can be using that money for military or police forces.


I, Vladimir Kozentov, will vote neither For or Against this resolution.


President Vladimir Kozentov
Leader of Chernobyl Power Plant

Uh, if you have the money and refuse to clean the water because you're too busy buying guns for soldiers who won't have anything to drink, I don't think you get to demand how the UN will fund it. (Or, to put it another way: it won't.) Appeal to the UNEA for financial assistance if you genuinely need it, but otherwise, that is mere petulence.

-- Samantha Benson
Congressional Liaison to the Department of UN Affairs
The Democratic States of Quintessence of Dust

The Federal Republic stands opposed to this measure (as though it were any surprise).

We apply the usual anti-fluffy reasons for our vote against. This is not an international issue; nations already have an interest in preserving the quality of water for their citizens, and they certainly don't need to be told by the United Nations to do so, or how to do it. We find the argument that waterways cross international boundaries rather weak: nations are fully capable of negotiating with neighboring powers over the state of the water that enters and leaves their territory. This is better reserved for the bilateral level; a UN resolution would do very little to help matters.

Cdr. Jenny Chiang
Acting Ambassador to the United Nations

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=420465
however, you may assign duties to an existing committee.

Edit: Fucking timewarp. This reply
|
|
v

Water is an international issue, since it is an international resource.
I like the sound of the proposal, but I didn't know you could task an already-established UN committee more ideals. Oh well. It tentatively has my support.

(Though I don't see it changing much anytime soon.)



Respectfully,
The Honorable Marcus Diegaus III, KCMC, CC
Senior Ambassador
UN Representative
The Royal Federation of the Genoshan Isles

Wow wow wow! WHAT! I agree with some of the other people here. This resolution infringes on soveriegnity. I mean what is the United Nations? A world government? No! It's a forum to stop international conflicts, not to tell other countries what to do. I mean, come on. This resolution is too ambitious. This will mean that all countries will have to clean the water, but what about those without the means to clean up the pollution? These countries need to focus on improving the economy to fix more pressing issues such as poverty. Do you know that today millions of people still starve becuase they don't have any food? That's right they die like animals becuase left-ist big cats propose bills and resolutions becuase they think trees and oceans are pretty.

I am not against clean water, but I think that clean water laws, such as outlawing asbestos dumping will suffice. Leave cleaning up river ways to charities.

PS While your at, why don't you make coastline development illegal so people don't destroy fish habitats.

This resolution is not bad in principle, but needs some more work.

Pugliasium votes "no".

...yet another meddling presumptuous "UN-mommy knows best and sod the right of a country to run itself" resolution. I agree with Pugliasium that the UN is not meant to be a world government - although it is now trying to act like one. While I'm all in favour of not dumping crap in common resources like the oceans etc. or shared lakes, watertables blah blah blah, if we in Putzi want to fill an internal lake in a remote region with mercury then what business is it of anyone else to say, "No, naughty! You can't do that, smack, smack, smack...stand in the naughty corner!"?

We have our own laws on this and it's quite frankly none of your business...we resent you thinking you know better, and even if you do this is our country and we will conduct internal affairs as we damn well like! We are very close to leaving the UN, which instead of dealing with international issues is meddling where it doesn't belong.

As usual the smug and intollerant leftwing fascist-intelligentsia know best and will tell everyone what to do...how long before the UN can't trust member states to run themselves and takes over for the "benefit and safety" of our citizens?? There is clearly a "Matrix Resolution" just around the corner...and we warn you...Putzi is about to unplug. We are seriously considering talks with others on forming an alternative international organistaion to counter the apalling rife fiddling and meddling we can smell in the offing at the UN.

The monopoly the UN has on international and now not-so-international-but-pretending issues should be torn down - we need competiton and a real choice for those who detest this invasive and growing nannying, but wish to address genuine international affairs.

Putzi is firmly AGAINST...as usual.

Thank you for supporting the Holy Empire of Pugliasium, and the sovereign rights of all other nations. This is a textbook example of Green Imperialism.

Although poor nations will be given low interest, or no interest loans who will pick up the tab? Who will provide all this money? The UN Environmental Agency? And do you know who gives them money? The other nations. Not only do other nations have to pay for their own water cleaning services wealthier nations will have to pay for poorer nations water cleaning aswell. Infringement of soveriegnity is all over this resolution.

Also, what if a nation wants to use a resevoir with potable water as a toxic waste storage facility? How will be able to store the toxic waste that is a by-product from the wonderfull products that we enjoy? If the resevoir can be secured, and even if it is potable water nation have the right to decide if it can dump in there.

Why can we not the let the natureal flow of the economy let things simply work this out? As a naition becomes richer it starts to pay more attention to other things than materials. Why do you think wealthy countries care about the environment so much! Because they gather enough capital to switch from manufacturing and agriculture to services and quaternary industries. Let nations govern themselves and soon, when all nations will have equal GDPs per capita then environmental laws will become similar and fair.

Take a page from Adam Smith and leave people alone.

As a nation that feels acutely the need for clean water, Snefaldia is adamant about supporting such environmentally-concious porposals. Our nation is bisected by a huge river which supplies water to our lowlands and farming communities, as well as being surrounded by four mountain ranges that provide fresh water in the form of melted snow. Industrial pollution and water contamination scares us, because the possibility of it happening is very high in our nation.

To speak to the issue of "national sovereignty," I challenge the morals and personal ethics of anyone who believes that they are allowed to rape, defile, and poison their own lands without regard for the effects it might have on another state or nation. National Sovereignty, in our view, does not extend to the common good. Your NatSov ends when industrial poisons find their way into our drinking water.

Water is the foremost unit of human existence; without it we are nomads in search of survival. Contamination of water resources is a heinous crime, and while it will not disappear entirely, this proposal is a huge advance in the protection of our fundamental natural resources.

If I may quote, before I end, a passage which I beleive underlines the importance. As the Orange Catholic Bible says- "The water is life."

Harmalan Shandreth
Ambassador Plenipotens

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=420465


Edit: Fucking timewarp. This reply
|
|
v

"It's just a jump to the left....And a step to the right..."

-- M. Diegaus III

I certainly enjoy and agree with many NatSov principles. However, I feel it is a violation of my NatSov for nations to force my nation to suffer the consequences (contaminated water) of their desire for more 'things', weapons and 'beautiful', barren landscapes.

I would like to see some evidence supporting the ‘successful economy leads to better environment’ argument. Some of the world’s biggest polluters are the wealthiest nations. (Yes, I’ll agree that they may ‘talk’ about the environment more, but what about actions?)
I would suggest that economy would benefit by considering environmental issues from the start, improving the longevity of resources. Also, preventing problems (like toxic areas) is cheaper than cleaning up (sometimes impossible), which becomes the interest of future developers and/or other elements of economy.

The ‘people are starving’ argument also needs some evidence to show how cleaner water hurts these folks. I see cleaner water as an improvement to everyone’s quality of life, especially those who cannot afford to buy bottled water. Though I am not much of an expert, it seems that protecting water sources helps agriculture as well.

What better use for the UN than to promote a world in which one nation cannot dictate the terms of life to another (i.e. water quality)? It is one thing to have legislation that ‘infringes’ on your rights, it is another to have no choice but to drink water that has been contaminated

Frege Gott
(taking a sip from his filtration water bottle, which he must use in the UN building)

Scotchpinestan, a nation founded on concern and love for the environment, strongly supports this proposal. We hope it will serve to clean up not only water supplies worldwide, but also the quality of the list of passed UN resolutions. (After three straight bad proposals, we are quite relieved to find one we can support.)

This proposal was received with approval by the Narnian Council. We believe that, in addition to the environmental and health benefits that will result (as pointed out by other supporters) proposals such as this encourage the government's accountability to their people.

The proposal takes the people's interests seriously, and will certainly increase the UN's civil rights priorities by a significant margin.

Our full support in this matter is pledged.

We have our own laws on this and it's quite frankly none of your business...we resent you thinking you know better, and even if you do this is our country and we will conduct internal affairs as we damn well like! We are very close to leaving the UN, which instead of dealing with international issues is meddling where it doesn't belong.If we recall correctly (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12963458&postcount=111), you opposed a previous mandate brought before this body because it wasn't meddling enough. And now you return, ranting and raving about UN imperialism and the left-wing intelligentsia imposing a fascist world government, and threatening a "Matrix" revolt, and setting up a rogue organization to counter the UN, and on and on and on. We would attribute such glaring inconsistencies to mere confusion on your part, but we give you far too much credit for that. Such a demonstrable, and dramatic, policy shift on the part of your delegation can only mean one thing: there has been a coup in your nation, and the previous government has been overthrown. While we are most gratified to see that the Putzi ambassador has apparently survived the revolution, on behalf of the Federal Republic I must impart to you that my government is very much committed to stability in the Bundesrepublik of Putzi -- the superfluous "i" in your name notwithstanding.

Cdr. Jenny Chiang
Acting Ambassador to the United Nations

"It's just a jump to the left....And a step to the right..."

-- M. Diegaus III

*Bob jumps onto his desk*

"You put your hands on your hips."

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

In the Name of the Eternal Kawaii (mtCObp)

We rise in full support of this resolution. Among our people water is considered one of the greatest gifts of the Cute One. Before the calamity which overcame our land, our nation spared no effort to ensure that its water supply was preserved as pristinely as possible. Since our peoples' journeys to foreign lands, though, we have seen with distress that many nations neglect this most basic resource, to both their own detriment and to the harm of their neighbors. As many here have pointed out, water is a universal substance, and thus its quality is an international issue. It would do honor to this institution if it took the lead in the preservation of that quality.

*Bob jumps onto his desk*

"You put your hands on your hips."

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

Darren follows and puts his knees in tight.

I mean what is the United Nations? A world government? No! It's a forum to stop international conflicts, not to tell other countries what to do. I mean, come on.You're thinking of the wrong UN...What's the United Nations (http://www.nationstates.net/page=faq#UN)?

The UN is the world's governing body. It proposes and votes on resolutions, which are then binding on all member nations. In other words, it's a hot-bed of political intrigue and double-dealing.

The Principality of Mephras, realizing the universal life giving nature of water, lends its support to this proposal, and urges all other nations to vote for this resolution. A free flowing gift from nature, water must be kept as pure as possible. As a nation devoted to human rights and the environment, we realize the innumerable benefits to be had from cleaner water across the world.

Spring Lily
Mephrasian UN Ambassador

Darren follows and puts his knees in tight.

Hell, I might as well do the pelvic thrust.....


- M. Diegaus III

We will be abstaining on this issue. While I respect the hardwork put into this proposal it would not to be to our advantage to have it pass. Our fledgling economy has main drains upon it (pardon the pun) and we may have to cut spending in other areas to meet this.
The fact that it is fairly difficult to maintain a public sewage system means we cannot rely on the fact our nationals will not use the river as a bathroom - afterall, the village water pump is only one way!

Carolina United is opposed to this resolution. We feel that this proposal could harm our industry and force our national government to spend money we don't have. This proposal could bankrupt smaller nations. It is not this bodies duty or responsibility to regulate things better left up to the individual nations. It is this bodies responsibility to regulate international trade and commerce, to insure human rights, and to serve as a medium between the individual nations. We are not here to to attempt to regulate every day life in the individual nations. We are opposed to this resolution as it is an attack on our national sovereignty. We feel that such resolutions and laws should be left to the individual nations.:sniper::mp5::headbang:

Hell, I might as well do the pelvic thrust.....


- M. Diegaus III

Careful, that will drive you insaaaaaaane.

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

Carolina United is opposed to this resolution. We feel that this proposal could harm our industry and force our national government to spend money we don't have. This proposal could bankrupt smaller nations. It is not this bodies duty or responsibility to regulate things better left up to the individual nations. It is this bodies responsibility to regulate international trade and commerce, to insure human rights, and to serve as a medium between the individual nations. We are not here to to attempt to regulate every day life in the individual nations. We are opposed to this resolution as it is an attack on our national sovereignty. We feel that such resolutions and laws should be left to the individual nations.:sniper::mp5::headbang:
*watches a Gnome suddenly collapse in the corner an a pathetic little mew from a corner as the mp5 smilie is used too*
You wouldn't happen to be allied with Conservative Carolina perchance?
I wonder what the environmental category's for....

Ben walks into the General Assembly, noting the various delegates doing the time warp, an impressively small amount of inane natsov bitching and a pitcher of water on every table. Well, except Sen. Sulla's.

First, we'd like to ask everyone to pour themselves a glass of water and make a toast to this glorious assembly and our participation herein.

The Federal Republic stands opposed to this measure (as though it were any surprise).

We apply the usual anti-fluffy reasons

Cdr. Jenny Chiang
Acting Ambassador to the United NationsWhere would the multiverse be without the anti-fluffiness of the Federal Republic. Even if partially misguided. Nations certainly have enough self-interest to provide clean water for their citizens. What their citizens and industries slough-off for the next nation (some of which can't be reversed)... where's the self-interest now?

In addition, bi-lateral treaties are not sufficient in this area. As the legendary, ocean-faring yellow duckies (http://www.dailymail.co.uk/pages/live/articles/news/news.html?in_article_id=464768&in_page_id=1770) have shown, water (and any contaminants it carries) is indeed a world issue.

And congratulations to commander Chiang on her promotion.
I fully support this proposal, but in my case, how would the UN clean up the water near Chernobyl?

That would take decades to fully clean and purify the water, and me and my government are not willing to pay the extra hundreds of millions of dollars just to clean up water
Our fledgling economy has main drains upon it (pardon the pun) and we may have to cut spending in other areas to meet this.I appreciate the abstentions of CPP and the Gaffa Territories and the reasoning of the Gaffans... the Power Plant's not so much. :) I'd like to point out to both that the requirement for clean water is such that it can be achieved step-wise... even if it takes decades.

Did the Gaffa Territories notice that, if this passes, they would most likely qualify for an emergency remediation loan from the UNEA?

Now back to our toast. Anyone have any idea where that water came from?

Ben Whitehorse,
Special Ambassador for Environmental Affairs
Rubinan Member, GTT
---------
~snipOOC: I think she would be fine with using this threadooc: Thanks guys.

I thank the Rubinan ambassador for pointing out the financial aid but I'm sure he'd understand that we'd rather not acquire any more debts than we'd have to.
I'm certain that in the future a catchphrase concerning 'cancelling world debt' will be on the rich nations' leaders' lips, but for now it's a millstone where everyone is happy to lend and no-one is quite sure how it will be repaid.

OOC: Have all of the various people who've referred to water as "a world issue" in this thread forgotten that the UN's member-nations aren't all on one single world, and that some of them actually have entire planets to themselves where whatever they do to their own environments can't have harmful effects on any other nations?

ooc: Forgotten? No. But the reality is most here roleplay some form of terran or terran-similar life-form (with a nod to the significant minority that don't). As for the use of "world", it rolls off the tongue more smoothly than "multiverse" but, at least for me, is used equivalently.

As with all UN resolutions (including your favorite, trade) there are UN nations to which the resolution has no relevancy. For those nations who are sole-occupiers of planets that are dependent on water, this resolution would benefit their individual citizens. For sole-occupiers (or even multiple) of planets that have no water, the resolution will create no in-character obligations (game stat-wanking aside).

Let's do the time warp again!!!!!!

-- M. Diegaus

If we recall correctly (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12963458&postcount=111), you opposed a previous mandate brought before this body because it wasn't meddling enough.

The policy of Putzi has been fully consistent - I have said already that we support strong action on international issues such as protecting common resources like the oceans - over which the oil tankers related to that earlier resolution travel! This water resolution is quite a different matter and one that meddles mainly on internal issues that should be exactly that - internal!

Such a demonstrable, and dramatic, policy shift on the part of your delegation can only mean one thing: there has been a coup in your nation, and the previous government has been overthrown.
We don't have coups, we have elections, and we haven't had one between these issues. There is no inconsistency (which you alone are inventing...).

...my government is very much committed to stability in the Bundesrepublik of Putzi -- the superfluous "i" in your name notwithstanding.

Erm, what on Earth are you talking about?? Is there a superfluous 'x' in Omigodtheykilledkenny?!

You are as ever patronising to the extreme, and in this case superfluous to the debate.

The Putzi Ambassador

First, let me say that Yelda supports this eminently sensible and constructive resolution. We congratulate the author on submitting a well-written and well thought out piece of legislation and look forward to its passage.

Aüþgæþ Spøtyiú
Ambassador

OOC: Have all of the various people who've referred to water as "a world issue" in this thread forgotten that the UN's member-nations aren't all on one single world, and that some of them actually have entire planets to themselves where whatever they do to their own environments can't have harmful effects on any other nations?
OOC: You're correct that there are nations which occupy the entire surface of a planet. Yelda is one of them. However, my current UN puppet is an island nation whose rivers all empty into the sea. I think that the majority of players RP "normal" nations that share borders and/or water resources with their neighbors.

!We don't have coups, we have elections, and we haven't had one between these issues. There is no inconsistency (which you alone are inventing...).
You know, I'm thinking that this is spin. I'm thinking that there is serious political upheaval in The Bundesrepublik of Putzi. Political upheaval which threatens to undermine the stability of the multiverse and endanger the lives of billions of our citizens.

Further, I'm thinking that a coalition should be formed to intervene in this crisis and restore order, in the best interests of the citizens of Putzi, of course. Yelda stands ready to commit significant forces to this endeavor. Would any of our colleagues be willing to participate? *raises an eyebrow and looks in the direction of the Kennyite delegation*

Aüþgæþ Spøtyiú
Ambassador

While I think that a individuals right to water is arguable, what I find upsetting about the bill is 10 C. I'd like to point out that this Resolution will throw out the water purity standards that we in Mix Master Tapes have created and replace them with your own, and if we don't have the capital to get in line with the standard than we will be forced into debt. I stand firmly against this resolution I'm just not willing to give this power to people who aren't citizens of my country.

Luke Mc Luke of the Honorable family Luke

You know, I'm thinking that this is spin. I'm thinking that there is serious political upheaval in The Bundesrepublik of Putzi. Political upheaval which threatens to undermine the stability of the multiverse and endanger the lives of billions of our citizens.

Further, I'm thinking that a coalition should be formed to intervene in this crisis and restore order, in the best interests of the citizens of Putzi, of course. Yelda stands ready to commit significant forces to this endeavor. Would any of our colleagues be willing to participate? *raises an eyebrow and looks in the direction of the Kennyite delegation*

Aüþgæþ Spøtyiú
Ambassador

We could help.

And we're abstaining. I lost my vote button, and can't find it.

All I have is this "easy button", and I don't need another damn copier or toner cartridge.

*throws "easy button" at the wall, triggering it. Inkjet cartridges begin raining down.*

Oh, for god's sake.

~Dr. Jules Hodz
Needs a very stiff drink

The Holy Empire of Pugliasium has now been humbled and after due deliberation, no matter how untimely it may be has realized that detruction of the world's oceans, and river ways would lead to destruction of the world's fisheries: a vital source of food for the poor and hungry, a vital source of money for industry, and a vital food for Fridays.

To spend a billion on the maintence of toxic waste and ocean clean up will produce billions of solid golds (nation currency) in the noble fishering industry.

However, Pugliasium would like to note the irony of Snefelda providing a quote from the book Dune for a water issue.

Count DaCananzi of Pugliasium

You know, I'm thinking that this is spin. I'm thinking that there is serious political upheaval in The Bundesrepublik of Putzi. Political upheaval which threatens to undermine the stability of the multiverse and endanger the lives of billions of our citizens.

Further, I'm thinking that a coalition should be formed to intervene in this crisis and restore order, in the best interests of the citizens of Putzi, of course. Yelda stands ready to commit significant forces to this endeavor. Would any of our colleagues be willing to participate? *raises an eyebrow and looks in the direction of the Kennyite delegation*Hells yeah! Who needs defenestration when we got the Exotic Special Forces™?

We stand with our Yeldan brothers in this time of crisis. For the sake of international order and global stability, the nation of Putzi must be secured. The rogue junta now holding sway over the Putzi government has but one choice: stand down immediately, or face military action at a time of our choosing. We will not allow the civilized world to be held hostage by a gang of psychopaths threatening insurrection in the hallowed halls of the United Nations.

"The Destructor from Del Fuego, Mexico,"
Manuelo Fernanda
President of the Federal Republic

Hells yeah! Who needs defenestration when we got the Exotic Special Forces™?

We stand with our Yeldan brothers in this time of crisis. For the sake of international order and global stability, the nation of Putzi must be secured. The rogue junta now holding sway over the Putzi government has but one choice: stand down immediately, or face military action at a time of our choosing. We will not allow the civilized world to be held hostage by a gang of psychopaths threatening insurrection in the hallowed halls of the United Nations.

"The Destructor from Del Fuego, Mexico,"
Manuelo Fernanda
President of the Federal Republic

We wish to note that the Akimonadi First Armoured Division is present in the UN building, and preparing for an incursion into the Putzi UN Office. Once we find out where it is.

~Dr. Jules Hodz

*Hurridly hangs a Gaffaen flag from his UN office-shack outside the building*
Feel free to knock down any shacks with no identification marks.

Cdr. Chiang and the rep from Yelda have lost their damn minds.


However, as a precautionary measure....
Diegaus hits a red button under his desk. All fifty Genoshan Marines from the GEMSD puts the Genoshan office on lockdown.

I'd rather not be caught unawares. We will stay out of this. Don't include us on either side.

-- M. Diegaus III

Hells yeah! Who needs defenestration when we got the Exotic Special Forces™?

We wish to note that the Akimonadi First Armoured Division is present in the UN building, and preparing for an incursion into the Putzi UN Office.

We stand shoulder to shoulder with our comrades from The Federal Republic and The Autocratic Federated Empire. Yeldan VII Red Banner Army is available for immediate deployment with full fleet support.

*Hurridly hangs a Gaffaen flag from his UN office-shack outside the building*
Feel free to knock down any shacks with no identification marks.

Cdr. Chiang and the rep from Yelda have lost their damn minds.


However, as a precautionary measure....
Diegaus hits a red button under his desk. All fifty Genoshan Marines from the GEMSD puts the Genoshan office on lockdown.

I'd rather not be caught unawares. We will stay out of this. Don't include us on either side.

-- M. Diegaus III
Now, now. You have no reason to fear us. We are your friends!

Yelda is the worlds last line of defense against tyranny and evil. Where our soldiers go, justice follows, riding the wind like a bell.

Aüþgæþ Spøtyiú
Ambassador

We stand shoulder to shoulder with our comrades from The Federal Republic and The Autocratic Federated Empire. Yeldan VII Red Banner Army is available for immediate deployment with full fleet support.

OOC: I'll RP the office invasion here. Any other invasion should probably go in II.

And I'm waiting to see if Putzi responds.

OOC: @Kenny, Aki and (possibly) Putzi. We shouldn't hijack this thread further. This could be fun but we probably need to take it somewhere else.

OOC: I'll RP the office invasion here. Any other invasion should probably go in II.

And I'm waiting to see if Putzi responds.
OOC: Good plan. I was posting while you were.

OOC: Good plan. I was posting while you were.

*giggles* Great minds think alike.

what I find upsetting about the bill is 10 C. I'd like to point out that this Resolution will throw out the water purity standards that we in Mix Master Tapes have createdArticle 10C authorizes the UNEA to arrange loans (preferably private, but UN funds when necessary) for nations unable to afford emergency remediation.

You're probably referring to 10b. If you'll look closer, the water quality goals provided by the UNEA are non-binding. They are suggestions based on where your nation is at any point in time with regard to water quality. They do not replace your national water quality requirements. Should anyone be hopping around celebrating a loophole, the provisions in article 3, 5 and 6 are mandatory.

YFurther, I'm thinking that a coalition should be formed to intervene in this crisis and restore order, in the best interests of the citizens of PutziFreedom for the Putzese!!

Ben Whitehorse,
Special Ambassador for Environmental Affairs
Rubinan Member, GTT
Liberator Extraordinare

Freedom for the Putzese!!

"Indeed."

Dr. Hodz raises a 100-foot long banner reading "FREEDOM FOR THE PUTZESE!!".

With UN member nations like that, it's no wonder why half of the nation's economies are... below acceptable standards.

With UN member nations like that, it's no wonder why half of the nation's economies are... below acceptable standards.

"Acceptable standards"? Which?

*scratches head in bemusement over the antics of the reps*

To return to the topic, many nations, such as mine, don't really need this resolution, since we already try to take care of our water. However, I travel a lot, and some nations have water that tastes like sewer sludge. Not just 3rd world nations either. Some "first world" nations have crappy water, even though they have plenty of money to fix it. That is why I vote FOR!

*sips water from canteen*

Frank Jackson, Foreign Relations Officer of Winter V.

Harmalan Shandreth mounts the lectern.

"As the duly appointed Ambassador Plenipotens, and representative of the Native Faith of Aatem Nal, I herevy give the approval of the Snefaldian government for any and all liberation efforts directed at the poor, oppressed Putzese! Clearly, virtue and righteousness demand action in the face of such persecution and internal turmoil!"

"Water rights are probably being abrogated as we speak in Putzi, despite the statements to the contrary being issued by the Putzian goverment mouthpiece! Ignore any declarations that "There is no turmoil in Putzi" for we can clearly see that this is, in fact, not the case!"

Shandreth pauses, blinking.

"Oh yes, we applaud the supporters of this bill for their staunch defense of clean water rights. As a nation dependent on water, we feel acutely..." he pauses again, realizing he's reading the same speech he gave earlier.

"Ah..ehm... er... Free Bigtopia!" he shouts before leaving the podium.

[The NSUN Nuncia of the Eternal Kawaii looks back and forth at Commander Chiang, Ambassador Spøtyiú, and the Putzi Ambassador, who appear ready to engage in fisticuffs in front of the GA podium. She hurridly whispers to one of her secretaries, who brings out an ornate Kawaiian tea service. The two Kawaiians then stride towards the commotion with the service in hand.]

"Excuse me, ladies, gentlemen...but would anyone like a cup of tea?"

"Acceptable standards"? Which?

heh. Just look at the nation that came up with the UN proposal.

There should be standards. But not meaningless standards that get in the way of economic progress.

13% unemployment.
Near 1 trillion in government waste.
121 billion in deficit.

Right. This is exactly why I don't join the UN.

heh. Just look at the nation that came up with the UN proposal.

There should be standards. But not meaningless standards that get in the way of economic progress.

13% unemployment.
Near 1 trillion in government waste.
121 billion in deficit.

Right. This is exactly why I don't join the UN.

"Then what, pray tell, the hell are you doing here?"

Harmalan Shandreth
Ambassador Plenipotens

"Then what, pray tell, the hell are you doing here?"

Harmalan Shandreth
Ambassador Plenipotens


Just because i'm not a part of it and even though the resolution does not affect me doesn't mean I can't talk about it.

Just because i'm not a part of it and even though the resolution does not affect me doesn't mean I can't talk about it.

"Oh yes, son, exactly. Just keep telling yourself that."

Shandreth mocks drinking a beer, appearing drunk.

We could help.

And we're abstaining. I lost my vote button, and can't find it.

All I have is this "easy button", and I don't need another damn copier or toner cartridge.

*throws "easy button" at the wall, triggering it. Inkjet cartridges begin raining down.*

Oh, for god's sake.

~Dr. Jules Hodz
Needs a very stiff drink

Grab those! Those are valuable trade fodder for other office supplies.

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

[The NSUN Nuncia of the Eternal Kawaii looks back and forth at Commander Chiang, Ambassador Spøtyiú, and the Putzi Ambassador, who appear ready to engage in fisticuffs in front of the GA podium. She hurridly whispers to one of her secretaries, who brings out an ornate Kawaiian tea service. The two Kawaiians then stride towards the commotion with the service in hand.]

"Excuse me, ladies, gentlemen...but would anyone like a cup of tea?"
Aüþgæþ Spøtyiú, about to launch into another tirade denouncing the illegitimate Putzean regime, pauses and turns toward the Nuncia.

"Why yes. Yes I would like a cup of tea, thank you."

The Holy Empire of Pugliasium has now been humbled and after due deliberation, no matter how untimely it may be has realized that detruction of the world's oceans, and river ways would lead to destruction of the world's fisheries: a vital source of food for the poor and hungry, a vital source of money for industry, and a vital food for Fridays.

To spend a billion on the maintence of toxic waste and ocean clean up will produce billions of solid golds (nation currency) in the noble fishering industry.

However, Pugliasium would like to note the irony of Snefelda providing a quote from the book Dune for a water issue.

Echo 1

Echo 2

Echo 3

Echo 4

*A technician from the UNBM's Communications Department runs in and makes a few adjustments to the GA's sound system*

"Sorry about that, it shouldn't happen again."

Unnamed Technician
Communications Department
UN Building Management

heh. Just look at the nation that came up with the UN proposal.

13% unemployment.
Near 1 trillion in government waste.
121 billion in deficit.

Ben splutters. I resemble that remark. Seriously, were the measure of a nation solely its economic indicators, we'd all be cut-throat capitalists. Since some of us find such to be reprehensible, we're quite happy to ignore your disdain.

As for environment vs. economics, I happen to believe that one can achieve much in both areas without undue harm to either.

Ben Whitehorse,
Still green after all these years.

Ausserland has voted FOR the resolution. It's well thought out, well written, and will have a salutary effect on a situation of undeniably international scope and import.

Got any of that tea left?

Balthasar H. von Aschenbach
Prime Minister

The Republic of Hephasterus supports this resolution.

Although generaly opposed to outside influences on our national affairs, we realize that water is an essential national resource, and one which must be preserved. The ability of other nations to negatively influence the quality of Hephasterus' water supply would be mitigated through the implementation of this resolution.

We therefore vote for passage.

Water is relatively scarce in our nation, and thus ensuring its quality and conservation are essential for us. This is particularly due to the fact that we are heavily dependent on aquifers that cross borders, and while we aren't voting in favor entirely due to enlightened self-interest, it cannot be denied that this resolution would benefit us and other nations in our situation. Therefore, the delegation of Altanar is pleased to express its support for this resolution.

- Jinella Agaranth, Ambassador

My boss told me to cast Brutland and Norden's vote FOR the resolution... *is thirsty*

Kyle di Fontana
Still wearing the bulletproof jacket from the last vote

Why the hell are my citizens supposed to care about water? All we drink in Ass Kickistan is whiskey! Unless we're hung over, then we stick to beer. Water? That's for fish to swim in, not for warriors to drink!

We have voted in favour of this resolution. As an aside, the delegate for Ass Kickistan may benefit from the knowledge that good whisky and beer (and any other alcoholic beverage, come to that) is dependent on a source of clean, high quality water. I advise that the delegate vote in favour of this resolution in order that noble warriors like he and his countryfolk will be guaranteed the very finest falling-down-water when escapading in barbarian lands.

Benedictions,

We have voted in favour of this resolution. As an aside, the delegate for Ass Kickistan may benefit from the knowledge that good whisky and beer (and any other alcoholic beverage, come to that) is dependent on a source of clean, high quality water. I advise that the delegate vote in favour of this resolution in order that noble warriors like he and his countryfolk will be guaranteed the very finest falling-down-water when escapading in barbarian lands.

Benedictions,

[The Ausserland Prime Minister taps the Dashanzi Foreign Minister on the shoulder and says with a grin:]

"He didn't say anything about good whiskey and beer."

Just because i'm not a part of it and even though the resolution does not affect me doesn't mean I can't talk about it.

You're absolutely right. And if you said something worthwhile rather than just sneering at people, folks might actually listen to you.

Balthasar H. von Aschenbach
Prime Minister

The Palentine is mildly opposed to this one, so once again its time to rely on the time tested method of casting our vote.<places large empty Fine Yeldan Pickle(TM) jar on desk.> You know the drill, largest bribe gets the vote, all offers are non-refundable.
Excelsior,
Sen. Horatio Sulla

Article 1 currently says:

1. DEFINES clean water as water reasonably free of pollutants and able to robustly support biodiversity of native aquatic species;

We feel that this is a tad vague because each nation can pick and choose what it thinks is a clean standard and then whenever water flows over a border the neighbours could have a significantly divergent clean water definition and hence an argument/game of conkers/war...

What is required is a 'parts per million' or 'moles per litre' etc. definition of the maximum allowed concentrations of various common substances and chemicals. Obviously not every single chemical known to man could be mentioned individually but it would be nice to see some limits for the most common and dangerous pollutants included, or perhaps a reference made to some kind of UN 'Clean Water Definiton' document.

Robustness of biodiversity support is of course far more difficult to quantify. Since the resolution is clearly going to succeed it seems fortunate for whose who disagree with the need for it that there is easily enough wriggle room for an anaconda...

The Putzi Ambassador

Does the ambassador from Putzi care to comment on the impending invasion of his office and nation?

~Dr. Jules Hodz

[The Ausserland Prime Minister taps the Dashanzi Foreign Minister on the shoulder and says with a grin:]

"He didn't say anything about good whiskey and beer."

You both make good points, but after the first few drinks it all tastes the same anyway. I think I'll abstain on this vote. Since most of the whiskey and beer we drink in Ass Kickistan is plundered from our victims anyway, we really can't be picky.

The fortunate, blessed, obedient people of Glorious Providence, the city on the hill, with all eyes skyward, whom HE has given limitless favor, could never acknowledge another authority such as the UN. Fortunate are we in that this misguided, yet binding, proposal would take action based upon a false premise. Can anything truly pollute our water unless it is HIS will? Oh, non-believers, so quick to reject HIS majesty as you are to accept a ridiculous fairy tale about pollution and global warming. You would safeguard the water yet suffocate your commerce and industry. Post-materialist heretics! We continue to pray for your unlikely salvation. REPENT!

The Palentine is mildly opposed to this one, so once again its time to rely on the time tested method of casting our vote.<places large empty Fine Yeldan Pickle(TM) jar on desk.> You know the drill, largest bribe gets the vote, all offers are non-refundable.

The NSUN Nuncia finishes serving Ambassador Spøtyiú and P.M. von Aschenbach, and turns to Senator Sulla, saying, "Well, while we usually frown upon the practice of vote buying, would a cup of Fine Kawaiian Oolong (TM) do?"

The fortunate, blessed, obedient people of Glorious Providence, the city on the hill, with all eyes skyward, whom HE has given limitless favor, could never acknowledge another authority such as the UN. Fortunate are we in that this misguided, yet binding, proposal would take action based upon a false premise. Can anything truly pollute our water unless it is HIS will? Oh, non-believers, so quick to reject HIS majesty as you are to accept a ridiculous fairy tale about pollution and global warming. You would safeguard the water yet suffocate your commerce and industry. Post-materialist heretics! We continue to pray for your unlikely salvation. REPENT!

Hey, we're Christians too. Pipe down.

And besides, we have free will.

~Dr. Jules Hodz
Would Like A Cup of Tea
Right About Now

Ben splutters. I resemble that remark. Seriously, were the measure of a nation solely its economic indicators, we'd all be cut-throat capitalists. Since some of us find such to be reprehensible, we're quite happy to ignore your disdain.

As for environment vs. economics, I happen to believe that one can achieve much in both areas without undue harm to either.

Ben Whitehorse,
Still green after all these years.

Speaking of business in this game, i've always wondered.

Is it your economic freedoms that are displayed on your nation under your UN category, or is it how well it's doing?

I wish it to be known that I find this matter highly offenece to my heavily industrillized nation! And I will not stand for it! Should this measure pass I will renoucne my UN membership!

And I encourage any other nation that relies hevily upon Corporations and conglomorates to also renouce thiers if this should happen!

Speaking of business in this game, i've always wondered.

Is it your economic freedoms that are displayed on your nation under your UN category, or is it how well it's doing?No, the "Economy" rating just shows how booming your economy is; economic freedoms are not displayed, but you can tell if your economic freedoms are good or bad by what type of government you're classified under: http://nstracker.jfsoftware.com/index.php?nation=unicore

Click on the "Capitalizt" link, and you'll see how the game ranks your personal, economic and political freedoms.

The Narnian Ambassador sat contentedly as five honored representatives stood up, one after the other, saying:

We have voted in favour of this resolution.

My boss told me to cast Brutland and Norden's vote FOR the resolution

Therefore, the delegation of Altanar is pleased to express its support for this resolution.

We therefore vote for passage.

Ausserland has voted FOR the resolution.

Unfortunately, directly afterwards, a loud scraping sound of a chair being pushed back was heard - with the honored *ahem* Putzi Ambassador rising to his feet. The Narnian Ambassador (and, I noticed, those surrounding me) groaned ever so slightly in apprehension.

We feel that this is a tad vague because each nation can pick and choose...'parts per million' or 'moles per litre'...robustness of biodiversity support is of course far more difficult to quantify.............

I believe my companions breathed a sigh of relief when our rather enthusiastic speaker had finished....

Although the Narnian Council recognizes the fault in the proposal that the Putzi Ambassador has pointed out, we do not believe that such detailed measures be conducted to prove the cleanliness of the conserved water at this time.

Perhaps it might be more effective if an extension of this piece of legislation be proposed (more accurately a part #2) - simply defining the acceptable standard of water quality that is to be consumed by member nations. This would strenghten the effectiveness of part #1, and certainly cause less confusion.

Post-materialist heretics! We continue to pray for your unlikely salvation. REPENT!

Interesting. Perhaps the honoured Ambassador of Putzi isn't so enthusiastic afterall...

I wish it to be known that I find this matter highly offenece to my heavily industrillized nation! And I will not stand for it! Should this measure pass I will renoucne my UN membership!Okay. We'll be sure and hold you to that.

You know the drill, largest bribe gets the vote, all offers are non-refundable.Ben walks over and deposits a .75L of Wild Turkey 101 in the pickle jar. How about a little firewater to sweeten the Nuncia's offer of tea.

We feel that this [ed: the definition in article 1] is a tad vague because each nation can pick and choose what it thinks is a clean standard and then whenever water flows over a border the neighbours could have a significantly divergent clean water definition and hence an argument/game of conkers/war...

What is required is a 'parts per million' or 'moles per litre' etc. definition of the maximum allowed concentrations of various common substances and chemicals.Hold on there, cowboy. Could you begin to name the "common" substances across the NSUN multiverse? Exactly how many different species are members presently? And how many will be members in the future? What are the minimum requirements for good health for all such divergent species?

It has been my observation that legislation from this body has a longer shelf-life when it doesn't micromanage in specificity. And thus, article 10b provides springing authority for the UNEA to provide "parts per million" definitions for individual nations taking into account that nation's species' needs, as well as, the needs of their surrounding neighbors.

The definition in article one uses "reasonably" for two reasons. One is to trigger the reasonable nation doctrine. Secondly, it is an acknowledgment that crystal clear, perfect water is beyond the budgetary reality of many, many nations. Especially developing nations. The requirement in article 1 for "reasonably" clean water (which you are correct, nations could define "reasonable" very unreasonably) is balanced with the requirement of robust support of aquatic biodiversity. Thus, nations cannot allow their water sources to barely get by on environmental life support.

Ben Whitehorse,
Rubinan Member, GTT
etc. etc. etc.

Ladies and gentlemen!

Secondly, it is an acknowledgment that crystal clear, perfect water is beyond the budgetary reality of many, many nations. Especially developing nations. The requirement in article 1 for "reasonably" clean water (which you are correct, nations could define "reasonable" very unreasonably) is balanced with the requirement of robust support of aquatic biodiversity. Thus, nations cannot allow their water sources to barely get by on environmental life support.


It is a fact that water purification will be beyond the budget limits of many nations but taking into account that water is an international ressource this will affect all other nations of the world as well. Regarding this the position of Ansgarian Nations as delegate for the Football Islands on this point is that there should be a definition of minimum standards of water quality that every nation should reach and there should be a fund installed to help less developed nations to get the financial ressources to meet this minimum.

A second point Ansgarian Nations would like to mention ist that "chemical or biological contaminants" are named explicitly in this resolution. We think that "radioactive contminants" should be named esplicitly as well because they are not necessarily coverd by those expressions.

Thank you for your attention!

The Very Friendly Schurkenstaat of Ansgarian Nations for the Football Islands

Happily for the Ansgarians this resolution includes a minimum standard for water quality--it must be able to sustain life for a wide-range of native aquatic life-forms. This is similar to the mythical USian definition of clean water being that which can be safely fished and swum in (without causing disease or death).

Although it would have been clearer had radioactivity been separately mentioned, I think we're fine in this area as well. Radioactivity is a physical property of chemicals (either elemental or compound) and thus can be seen to be included in the phrase chemical contaminant. Had your comment occurred earlier (during the drafting stage) we would have included your suggestion.

Ben Whitehorse

Ladies and gentlemen, as you might be aware, the Nifty Fraternity of Retired WerePenguins was founded by the wonderful nation of Tzorsland, now in the New York region; a nation known for it’s pathetic, horrid and very unsafe to drink water. Unfortunately, Tzorsland is not in the UN because we are in the UN; stupid gnomes and their stupid rules. Retired WerePenguins has wonderful water, and we will continue to have wonderful water no matter what the outcome of this resolution will be.

Meanwhile, we have voted for this resolution, even though we know that the water of Tzorsland will still not be safe to drink.

Meanwhile this thread deserves some pointless image spam. Or a pointless image of spam. Whatever.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y171/trippy1979/Minnesota%202006/minnesota_08.jpg

Hold on there, cowboy. Could you begin to name the "common" substances across the NSUN multiverse? Exactly how many different species are members presently? And how many will be members in the future? What are the minimum requirements for good health for all such divergent species?
By that standard, this legislation should be scrapped. Water is, like, totally deadly to many species and should be outlawed instead of conserved!!1!!11!

OOC: Which is to say, I appreciate roleplay, but this approach of "let's be as individualistic as possible" makes it quite impossible to do anything reasonable.

Yes, once again a totally useless UN debate. As was proven before the odds that those who could not give a flying hoot about debating legislation, will always vote 3:1 (aka "Yes!") in favour of any proposal. As such, the fact that national sovereignty is being undermined by the current proposal is irrelevant, nor that water may be acidic to certain alien species. Tsk, tsk. I hope I did not breach any sacred UN rule of decorum by posting this. I hope the eminent authority on the topic, Dr. Hodz, may be able to shed some light.

By that standard, this legislation should be scrapped. Water is, like, totally deadly to many species and should be outlawed instead of conserved!!1!!11! OMFGBBQ!!!1111eleventy-eleven.

As such, the fact that national sovereignty is being undermined by the current proposal is irrelevant, nor that water may be acidic to certain alien species. Tsk, tsk. I hope I did not breach any sacred UN rule of decorum by posting this. I hope the eminent authority on the topic, Dr. Hodz, may be able to shed some light. Which is why article 3 includes the phrase "improve general water quality, appropriate to its various uses". If it is a highly acidic (we'll ignore the bad science here) poison on your home world (or whatever) then you're probably not going to be required to improve its quality, eh?

Sacred UN rule? I believe if you'd check, you'd realize the UN is a secular institution, and the esteemed Dr. Hodz is much more likely to toss you out the nearest window than waste his time on you.

Speaking of wasting time, I've cast my vote, there hasn't been any decent objection except 'ur stealin' my sovereignty' and I indicated from the outset that those would be ignored because they're baseless, so I'm off to the bar to have some whisky and water.

Ben Whitehorse.
etc. etc. etc.

Yes, once again a totally useless UN debate. As was proven before the odds that those who could not give a flying hoot about debating legislation, will always vote 3:1 (aka "Yes!") in favour of any proposal. As such, the fact that national sovereignty is being undermined by the current proposal is irrelevant...
Absolutely! The drone-delegates will vote any rubbish in.

Hold on there, cowboy. Could you begin to name the "common" substances across the NSUN multiverse? Exactly how many different species are members presently? And how many will be members in the future? What are the minimum requirements for good health for all such divergent species?
Rubina has just proved his/her own resolution pointless, but still it will be approved...just how stupid is the UN?!


The Putzi Ambassador

(Who has decided that the UN is about as much an august body as this debate has a point.)

Bad science? How about atrocious? Pure water has a pH of 7, which is smack-dab neutral. There can be no species to which water is acidic, and I've not yet met in this UN a species made of iron or other water oxidizing metals or minerals. Even the cyborg races use water to cool their industrial machinery, and even coolant water needs to have a standard of cleanliness to avoid getting grit or impurities in the works.

This resolution is no threat to national sovereignty, so those yammering about that can lump themselves in with their "3:1 drone-delegate" peers as they drone on and on about NatSov. Persons of this forum, everything that lives needs water in one form or another, science fiction be hanged.

Voting for, and without any trace of drone, thank you very much.




P.S. -- It's good to be a delegate again!

Benji

The person who pisses and moans about National Sovereignty again is getting chucked outta the nearest window with a steam-powered trebuchet.

Orders a nearby Genoshan Marine to set up "Ye Olde Genoshan Defenestrator"

Someone test me! The ambassador from Putzi has already got three nations' ambassadors and their personal security detachments on his/her ass, and he/she's looking to add a fourth.

-- Marcus Diegaus III

*Knocks the glass of water off the bench, sending it clattering to the floor*

Ambassadors! Senators! This august body, and I say that with pride, has already brought this proposal before the General Assembly to vote!

As this will be inevitably passed as a resolution, there is no point in prolonging this worthless debate! Those who insist upon filling our ears with whining *glances at the ambassador for Putzi*, might like to enforce their complaints by taking action! And not the kind employed by the ambassador for the Genoshan Isles!

*Clicks his fingers and orders a detachment of Narnian Federal Security officers to stand in close proximity to Ambassador for Putzi and 'Ye Olde Genoshan Defenestrator'.*

Mr. Ambassador for the Genoshan Isles - there is no need to catapult certain members of this august body through the window. I, for one, do not wish to see this meeting turned into the siege of Caen.

~ Lord Chancellor Luke Bonanno of the Narnian Council

Sacred UN rule? I believe if you'd check, you'd realize the UN is a secular institution, and the esteemed Dr. Hodz is much more likely to toss you out the nearest window than waste his time on you.

*Ahem.*

Indeed.

-snip-

Dr. Hodz grabs his microphone and talks loudly into it.

"Having received no reply from the Putzese ambassador as to the crude state of his homeland, and the rogue junta that holds the power there, we officially revoke our recognition of Putzi as a sovereign state."

As Dr. Hodz finished, fifty or so men clad in SWAT-like outfits entered the assembly. They rushed up to the Putzi ambassador and pointed their M16s at him.

The leader of the group took out a pair of handcuffs.

"You are hereby arrested for stifling the freedom and oppressing the people of Putzi as well as attempting to breach the peace. Put your hands in the air."

Dr. Hodz looked up, where his "Freedom for the Putzese" banner still hung.

He pulled out another one, and layed it across his desk.

It read:
http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/thumb/e/e7/Naciones_Unidas_3.jpg/180px-Naciones_Unidas_3.jpg

No such action will be necessary, thank you, Mr. Ambassador for Akimonad.

More Narnian Federal Security officers confidently burst into the room, surrounding the Ambassador for Akimonad. An officer firmly grips the Ambassador's shoulder.

That will be enough Mr. Ambassador.

Another group strides in and surrounds Akimonad's SWAT team (attempting to arrest the Representative for Putzi) their M16's carefully readied and aimed. The group attending the Ambassador for Genoshan Isles leaves and positions itself near the Narnian Lord Chancellor Luke Bonanno.

The Putzese will retain their homeland. Do not attempt hostility. Let us resume this discussion in peace.

The Lord Chancellor looks at his spilt glass of water, and shakes his head woefully.

~ Lord Chancellor Luke Bonanno of the Narnian Council

Shandreth, producing a drum from nowhere, begins to bang loundly on it.

"Summon the Robotic Destructor Bunnies! Summon the Bunnies! Summon the Bunnies!"

He readjusts his glasses, then proceeds to wail loudly on the drum.

Yes, once again a totally useless UN debate. As was proven before the odds that those who could not give a flying hoot about debating legislation, will always vote 3:1 (aka "Yes!") in favour of any proposal.So how do you explain all the Proposals that fail?

I urge all nations that hold fiscal growth dear to vote against this regressive, anti-business measure, that will only hurt honest, hard-working citizens and nations.

Altanar's ambassador, Jinella Agaranth, stands up with a disgusted look on her face.

Yes, once again a totally useless UN debate. As was proven before the odds that those who could not give a flying hoot about debating legislation, will always vote 3:1 (aka "Yes!") in favour of any proposal. As such, the fact that national sovereignty is being undermined by the current proposal is irrelevant, nor that water may be acidic to certain alien species. Tsk, tsk.

If you feel this debate is so useless, how about contributing something to it besides whining? Something to address your claim that this resolution would violate national sovereignty, perhaps? Our delegation feels that that claim is irrelevant when stacked against the concern of water scarcity or pollution crossing borders, being an international concern and all, but it might be nice to hear something resembling a convincing argument otherwise for a change. As for water being acidic to certain species, the honorable ambassador from Intangelon already addressed that point and revealed how...well...pointless it is.

Absolutely! The drone-delegates will vote any rubbish in.

And you have proof of this, of course? No? What a shock.

*Clicks his fingers and orders a detachment of Narnian Federal Security officers to stand in close proximity to Ambassador for Putzi and 'Ye Olde Genoshan Defenestrator'.*

As Dr. Hodz finished, fifty or so men clad in SWAT-like outfits entered the assembly. They rushed up to the Putzi ambassador and pointed their M16s at him.

More Narnian Federal Security officers confidently burst into the room, surrounding the Ambassador for Akimonad. An officer firmly grips the Ambassador's shoulder.

That will be enough Mr. Ambassador.

Another group strides in and surrounds Akimonad's SWAT team (attempting to arrest the Representative for Putzi) their M16's carefully readied and aimed. The group attending the Ambassador for Genoshan Isles leaves and positions itself near the Narnian Lord Chancellor Luke Bonanno.

The Putzese will retain their homeland. Do not attempt hostility. Let us resume this discussion in peace.

So, Chancellor Bonanno, you want this discussion to be peaceful, yet your people are waving guns around with the worst...er...best of them? Do you even see how ridiculous that is?

How about all of you put away your little toy guns, sit down and let this debate continue? If you want to invade or defend Putzland or whatever it is, then please do so.....there. Waving around your death-dealing, giant metallic penises is probably great fun to you and all, but it's absolutely demeaning to this assembly.

Agaranth sits back down, muttering something about "stupid men" under her breath.

Dr. Hodz pushed off the man grabbing him and looked at Bonanno.

"Do not threaten me. Yelda will unleash their robot destructor bunnies. Let see you defend yourself from those."

Dr. Hodz pressed a small button on his desk.

"Now," he said as two hundred more men strode into the room, "lower your weapons."

Benji stands up and adjusts the volume control on his Speak-O-Mat Vocal Extrapolator 3000 to "supersede".

WHAT HAS THIS DEBATE BECOME?!?

Resets the volume to "plaintive".

Weapons being waved around? Talk of defenestration with medieval machinery? Look, I found the Putzi and Proto ambassadors' NatSov tirades tiresome, too, but let's not degenerate into a bad TV drama, with guns being pulled and melodramatically-voiced statements hurled around ("lower your weapons") like so much lox at a bar mitzvah.

Let's all just relax, agree to disagree and get on with life, shall we?

Lest we forget:

"There are three duties that a gentleman prizes: to banish from his bearing violence and levity; to sort his face to the truth; to purge his speech of the low and unfair."

Benedictions,

The NSUN Nuncia finishes serving Ambassador Spøtyiú and P.M. von Aschenbach, and turns to Senator Sulla, saying, "Well, while we usually frown upon the practice of vote buying, would a cup of Fine Kawaiian Oolong (TM) do?"

Sen. Sulla looks up and gives the Nuncia a leer that would make Lord Julius proud, and says,
"Sorry sweetheart, drinking tea is bad for your health. Can't be sure of the purity of the water. How about a couple of your catgirls?"

Ben walks over and deposits a .75L of Wild Turkey 101 in the pickle jar. How about a little firewater to sweeten the Nuncia's offer of tea.
Sen Sulla reaches in and removes the bottle, and says,
"Its a start, but we would prefer some spendable currency. My unsavory and unwholesome habits are not cheap."

Needless to say, this venture won't be cheap. A ton of money will come out of a lot of nation's pockets for a venture of this magnitude. However, if financial assistance will be given to nations who can't afford this type of project, I don't see any fault with voting for this proposal. Hopefully, this won't be as controversial as the Individual Self-Determination proposal. It needs to be done, and I applaud the author.

Has nobody in this esteemed chamber any dignity. We are all being very childish in our arguements over this issue. Could we please behave like adults?

[The Prime Minister wakes up from a short nap and turns to Ambassador Thwerdock.]

PM: "Who are all these dimwits with guns?"

Thwerdock: "They're from Akimonad and the Narnian Council. Some dust-up about arresting the Ambassador from Putzi."

PM: "Who's the Ambassador from Putzi?"

Thwerdock: "You know, the one who does nothing but whine."

PM: "Oh, yeah. How come there are so many of them?"

Thwerdock: "Beats me. They must be really, really competent."

[They chortlle.]

PM: "Think I should tell Luigi to get rid of them?"

Thwerdock: "Naw. While they're here trying to look tough they're not getting into trouble somewhere else."

PM: "OK."

Thwerdock: "But if that lamebrain over there doesn't stop banging that drum, I'm gonna do a tapdance on his kneecaps. It's giving me a headache."

PM: "Be my guest." [He nods off again.]

Over the din of the attempted arrest, a gaveling sound can be heard.

The PRESIDING OFFICER. Could we please have order in the chamber, please? The delegations from Putzi, Akimonad, and the Narnian Council will please take their seats.

It having attained to the appropriate hour on the sixth day of September, 2007, voting is now closed on the resolution currently at vote. The Clerk will designate the resolution.

The READING CLERK. United Nations Resolution #222. Water Quality and Conservation, proposed by Rubina, a resolution to increase the quality of the world's environment at the expense of all businesses.

The PRESIDING OFFICER. The decision of the United Nations has been rendered thusly: The resolution Water Quality and Conservation was passed 6,700 votes to 1,795, and implemented in all UN member nations. The member nations of the United Nations will be immediately informed of the outcome of this vote.

Diegaus orders "Ye Olde Genoshan Defenestrator" back into the storage chamber of the Genoshan dungeon.

Good thing I didn't have to use it.

And if the Ambassador from Altanar wants to inquire about the proper measurement of my "weaponry", she can fill out the proper paperwork and wait in line for a reply.

Dr. Hodz, we must go over invas...er, I mean, contingency plans soon....

-- Marcus Diegaus III

The Lord Chancellor glanced at the Presiding Officer, who was attempting to be heard over the confusion. The Federal Security officers immediately obeyed the summons, assembled the formation and left the area, as proudly as if marching from a victorious conflict.
The Lord Chancellor, clad in all his regalia, stood as the assembly closed. Two heavily protected agents flanked him as he approached Jinella Agaranth, the Ambassador for Altanar.

Ambassador, would you share my opinion that the difference between a successful person and others is not a lack of strength, not a lack of knowledge, but rather a lack of...well...you'd know.............

With that, the Narnian Lord Chancellor smiled and left to spend the rest of the closing time in friendly discussion with the Ambassador of the Genoshan Isles. His bodyguard left his person to attempt to roughly wake the snoring and blissfully apathetic Ausserland.

Dr. Hodz pushed off the man grabbing him and looked at Bonanno.

"Do not threaten me. Yelda will unleash their robot destructor bunnies. Let see you defend yourself from those."

Dr. Hodz pressed a small button on his desk.

"Now," he said as two hundred more men strode into the room, "lower your weapons."

At that moment the entire UN Building Management Maintence of Order Department burst in through every entrance to the GA. They quickly move in to surround the troops that the delegations from Putzi, Akimoniad, the Narnian Council had brought in. Patrick O'Neil (The Head of the Maintence of Order Department) walked over to the microphone and, drawing on his his experience as a drill instructor, addressed the GA.

"LISTEN UP, MAGGOTS! We are no longer going to stand for this kind of behavior in the General Assembly. If you want to go to war, fine, but do it where it belongs (http://forums2.jolt.co.uk/forumdisplay.php?f=1230), not in the General Assembly. DO YOU GET ME?!"

Dr. Hodz, we must go over invas...er, I mean, contingency plans soon....

-- Marcus Diegaus III

"Indeed." Dr. Hodz said, ignoring Building Mgmt. Word had reached him that they couldn't spell his country's name correctly, and Dr. Hodz had utter contempt for that sort of thing.

And if the Ambassador from Altanar wants to inquire about the proper measurement of my "weaponry", she can fill out the proper paperwork and wait in line for a reply.

No need....if your physical endowment matches your intellectual one, Ambassador Diegaus, I am sure to be soundly disappointed yet again.

- Jinella Agaranth, Ambassador

No need....if your physical endowment matches your intellectual one, Ambassador Diegaus, I am sure to be soundly disappointed yet again.

- Jinella Agaranth, Ambassador

Miss, your wit has intrigued me.
Now, if you'd thaw out that frigid box you call a heart, and be up for more civil conversation, I'd be more than happy to oblige.

-- Marcus Diegaus III

I'd like to thank a few people starting with, again, Quintessence of Dust for draft comments and the work they're doing at The Green Think Tank (http://z13.invisionfree.com/Green_Think_Tank/index.php?), the delegates who approved the proposal, everyone who voted for it, those of you who became involved in the "At vote" thread--participation is what this is all about--the silly Dr. Hodz, the mods, my parents, this bottle of Jack Daniels, the FSM, all the little people, Sally Field

Leetha Talone enters the hall. Ben, just shut up. Everyone else, there's a tab at the bar for celebratory libations.

Has nobody in this esteemed chamber any dignity. We are all being very childish in our arguements over this issue. Could we please behave like adults?Well, until Building Management gets the weapons nullifiers (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=12919070&postcount=243) in place, there's not much hope.

With that, the Narnian Lord Chancellor smiled and left to spend the rest of the closing time in friendly discussion with the Ambassador of the Genoshan Isles. His bodyguard left his person to attempt to roughly wake the snoring and blissfully apathetic Ausserland.

[As the Narnian bodyguard reached out to shake the Ausserland Prime Minister, he wasn't paying attention to the very short (dwarves are, you know) but very substantial (dwarves are that, too) woman seated to the PM's right. Before he knew what was happening, he was flat on his back and the dwarvish woman (Ambassador Thwerdock) was standing on his knees.]

"Now, friend," the Ambassador said rather sweetly, "I was wondering if you liked tap dancing. See, you've got a couple of choices right about now. Choice one is that you follow your little friend in the funny outfit, find yourself a nice cup of tea, and never get within ten feet of His Excellency again. Choice two is that I do a little tap dance on your kneecaps. I really think choice one would be a good one for you. Oh, and don't mind that little lady holding the heavy chair over her head, ready to slam it down on yours. That's just Ambassador Ahlmann doing her daily exercises."

[These dwarvish diplomats are just a bundle of fun.... unless one happens to be standing on your kneecaps.] :D

[As the Narnian bodyguard reached out to shake the Ausserland Prime Minister....Before he knew what was happening, he was flat on his back and the dwarvish woman (Ambassador Thwerdock) was standing on his knees.

The Narnian Lord Chancellor, quietly conversing with the Ambassador for the Genoshan Isles, stopped midsentence and glanced to his right, where a dwarf could be seen standing over his Narnian bodyguard.

Narnian Lord Chancellor Luke Bonanno chuckled softly, and took a mental note of the word 'Ausserland'. Dismissing the apparent crisis, he returned to the conversation.

At the time, the dwarves had not realized that the Narnian personal bodyguard was comprised of TWO officers.

Two heavily protected agents flanked him as he approached Jinella Agaranth...

Consequently, both the little aggressors met their own excellency with rather bruised foreheads, while the bodyguard strode back to accompany their Lord Chancellor.

[Ausserland DID break the rp rules...leniency should then also be bestowed upon us :)]

The Lord Chancellor was heard saying to the Genoshan Isles Ambassador how pleased he was that this proposal had been passed so easily...

Miss, your wit has intrigued me.
Now, if you'd thaw out that frigid box you call a heart, and be up for more civil conversation, I'd be more than happy to oblige.

You're welcome to attempt to unfreeze my heart anytime you see me not on duty, as it were. I do enjoy civil conversation...but as recent events show, civility is not a common practice in this particular arena.

- Jinella Agaranth, Ambassador

You're welcome to attempt to unfreeze my heart anytime you see me not on duty, as it were. I do enjoy civil conversation...but as recent events show, civility is not a common practice in this particular arena.

- Jinella Agaranth, Ambassador

Dr. Hodz smiles sheepishly.

silly Dr. Hodz,

Yay!
this bottle of Jack Daniels,

I could see that...
Sally Field

On the other hand, what's in that liquor?

~Dr. Jules Hodz

[Ausserland DID break the rp rules...leniency should then also be bestowed upon us :)]


OOC: I don't know what "RP rules" I broke. I assumed that "bodyguard" was a singular noun, referring to one person. I guess this shows why I don't RP much. :(

Sen. Sulla looks up and gives the Nuncia a leer that would make Lord Julius proud, and says,
"Sorry sweetheart, drinking tea is bad for your health. Can't be sure of the purity of the water. How about a couple of your catgirls?"

The NSUN Nuncia of the Eternal Kawaii gives Senator Sulla a look of righteous indignation (dude, she's 14!) and turns around in a huff, muttering "ecchi!" She and her staff go about about serving tea to O'Neil and the rest of the UNBM MOD while they try to impose some order in the hall.

OOC: I don't know what "RP rules" I broke. I assumed that "bodyguard" was a singular noun, referring to one person. I guess this shows why I don't RP much. :(OOC: I think he's trying to accuse you of Godmoding, because you assumed his character had fallen to the floor after Amb. Thwerdock tackled him. It's really a rather nitpicky way of interpreting Godmoding rules; minor nothings like that hardly count in my book.

I should just like to clarify for posterity that at absolutely no point in the history of the UN up to the very second that this is posted at, were any of Putzi's troops in the UN; it was just I, the Ambassador, surrounded by a Matryoshka doll of those belonging to several other nations.

The Putzi Ambassador

OOC: I think he's trying to accuse you of Godmoding, because you assumed his character had fallen to the floor after Amb. Thwerdock tackled him. It's really a rather nitpicky way of interpreting Godmoding rules; minor nothings like that hardly count in my book.

OOC: Thanks, Kenny. Just another example of why I should steer clear of the RP stuff, which I shall do in the future. I keep telling people I'm not good at it. ;)

OOC: Thanks, Kenny. Just another example of why I should steer clear of the RP stuff, which I shall do in the future. I keep telling people I'm not good at it. ;)

OOC: Oh, don't take it so bad - I wasn't 'accusing' you of breaking RP rules, I simply pointed out why I broke them too! (Gave the dwarves bruised foreheads hehe) Generally, when RPing, I know I'm pretty much safe from godmodding if I ensure that I only explain what happens to my own characters - as to describe what happens to others is usually considered as godmodding - though like kenny pointed out, its really no big deal. Keep up the RPing!

~ Lord Chancellor Luke Bonanno of the Narnian Council

OOC: Oh, don't take it so bad - I wasn't 'accusing' you of breaking RP rules, <snip>

[Ausserland DID break the rp rules...<snip>

*cough*

"Indeed." Dr. Hodz said, ignoring Building Mgmt. Word had reached him that they couldn't spell his country's name correctly, and Dr. Hodz had utter contempt for that sort of thing.OOC: So I typoed, deal with it.

I should just like to clarify for posterity that at absolutely no point in the history of the UN up to the very second that this is posted at, were any of Putzi's troops in the UN; it was just I, the Ambassador, surrounded by a Matryoshka doll of those belonging to several other nations.

The Putzi Ambassador

OH, you're right, there are no Putziese troops. Sorry, there are so many troops there it's kind of hard to tell whose troops are whose.

Patrick O'Neil
Head of the Maintence of Order Department
UN Building Management

The Nuncia of the Eternal Kawaii looked over at Ambassador Thwerdock, Chancellor Bonanno, and Prince Rhodri, and sighed. Carrying the tea service over to the three feuding delegations, she looked around intensely and said with a forced smile, "Now, gentlemen, ladies, please. Tea?"

Mr. Ambassador for Gobbannium,

If you've got something against Ausserland,
If you are trying to be funny,
If your heart jumped at the thought of causing contention here,
Or if you are just arrogant,
Or simply and idiotically stupid,

Please by all means say so. And see your doctor about that nasty cough of yours.

But please don't join in on a discussion which you have had nearly no part in, if you are intent on 'exposing the faults' of others.

Thank you Ambassador for the Eternal Kawaii - no sugar please.

OOC: sorry, I keep forgetting to turn the signature off when it's irrelevant. I was merely trying to tactfully point out that your recollection of what you said was inaccurate. You probably owe someone an apology somewhere.

IC: Ah, thank you nuncia-san. Two sugars and a little milk, please.