NationStates Jolt Archive

In the wake of a bloodless military coup sparked at massive Parliamentary and popular anger at the former President for steadfastly keeping the Most Serene Republic of Hualien a member of the United Nations despite its cultural imperialism, the Parliament has just voted overwhelmingly to withdraw from the United Nations, a resolution signed by President Ma Huairen as soon as it crossed his desk. Fromt his moment, Hualien will no longer be a member of the 聯合國 (as it is known locally) due to the imperialistic nature of the organization.

Oh, okay. Bye.

I got his office.

I got his office.

Loophole: I get his furniture and other belongings.

Loophole: I get his furniture and other belongings.
Fine, fine. We'll just bring up our furniture from the UNOG Complex, and courier in the other neccesities from Enn.

Good. (For a minute, I was regretting not adding "including, but not limited to, blah blah blah.")

In the wake of a bloodless military coup sparked at massive Parliamentary and popular anger at the former President for steadfastly keeping the Most Serene Republic of Hualien a member of the United Nations despite its cultural imperialism, the Parliament has just voted overwhelmingly to withdraw from the United Nations, a resolution signed by President Ma Huairen as soon as it crossed his desk. Fromt his moment, Hualien will no longer be a member of the 聯合國 (as it is known locally) due to the imperialistic nature of the organization.

See - I just resigned cause I thought it was ineffective and hypocritical :}

Stapler's mine.

Stapler's mine.

I will fight you for that stapler. At most you can take the singing fish.

Confucius say, man try stop Gruenberg take stapler, he get kicked in bars.

Also: as always, I would note that the only way to change the UN's imperialism is to be a member.

Confucius say, man try stop Gruenberg take stapler, he get kicked in bars.

Really? I always thought that was by Mr. Miyagi.

Oh, okay. Bye.

I got his office.
No, no, and no, sorry.:p

If you check the "Right to Divorce" thread, in which he originally announced his resignation, I bagsied his office right quick. I've been needing an office for some time now; the dumpster out back just wasn't cutting it.

Also: as always, I would note that the only way to change the UN's imperialism is to be a member.

Quoted for truth.

Oh, and I get his concubines. :cool:

Quoted for truth.

Oh, and I get his concubines. :cool:

The females or the males?

Yay! I found a singing fish! And it moves, too :D

The females or the males?

Just the females. The males remain up for grabs.

Just the females. The males remain up for grabs.

I want those males! For uh the interest of those poor males of course, not a shameless way to gain my lords favour at all*cough*

as far as i remember therules, the person who plays the card first gets first bagsy on the office.

Our office is large enough as it is thank you. :)

as far as i remember therules, the person who plays the card first gets first bagsy on the office.

Our office is large enough as it is thank you. :)

http://test256.free.fr/UN%20Cards/office.jpg

ok, so it's mine:D

I declared my claim for his fridge in the UNOG complex when he first contemplated his resignation. Seeing as I now have carpets from three different offices, I suppose I can let you have everything else.

Oh, and Gruen, you can have the stapler if I get the staples :D

http://test256.free.fr/UN%20Cards/office.jpg

ok, so it's mine:D
Nonono!

I bagsied his office long ago when he announced his resignation in the Right to Divorce thread! I even played the card! Go check, I swear!

We would like the door to the office, as we have a really cool idea for an ancient japanese style office, complete with geisha and everything, twill be really rather spiffalicious.

Rumours of a national door shortage within our country are falsehoods created by our enemies to make us seem weak and...drafty.

Just the females. The males remain up for grabs.
Isn't that against some U.N. resolution or another? Something about gender equality...

The-Republic']Nonono!

I bagsied his office long ago when he announced his resignation in the Right to Divorce thread! I even played the card! Go check, I swear!


Indeed:

The-Republic']http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v335/JimRad-Mac/ns/office.jpg

See ya!

http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10078005&postcount=330

But i contest the legality, as you didn't display the card in the thread you only put a link, i'm prety sure it's not valid, we have to check.:D :p ;):headbang: :cool: :gundge:

Ah, but I ask you this: what of the Jolt users that have images disabled? To them, there would be no visual difference between posting the image and posting a link.

Therefore, in the interest of fairness to all forum users, I would attest that a link is perfectly acceptable. :p

Stapler's mine.Lies. I always get the staplers. You can have the staple-remover and the tape dispenser though.

The-Republic']Ah, but I ask you this: what of the Jolt users that have images disabled? To them, there would be no visual difference between posting the image and posting a link.

Therefore, in the interest of fairness to all forum users, I would attest that a link is perfectly acceptable. :p


Ok, you win it, but my character has not office yet, he just find a not used seat in the IT servers room, it was then easy for him to bug the NSO and the Gatesville Forums, but now, he's looking for a real office, is there any available, or should he must wait for the next one to leave, and be the first to play the card;)

hang on here :)

isn't there sufficent office space for 30,000+ ambassadors and their staff in the UN building?

I would ask building mgmt, but where are the servers? I've needed to string a network jack to my office since I first got here - it seems they failed to wire up the basement levels, and I'm in the lowest charted basement to date.

hang on here :)

isn't there sufficent office space for 30,000+ ambassadors and their staff in the UN building?

Well if people stopped making it so that only two people per floor and people like Enn didn't establish 2 different offices.....we might have room.

hang on here :)

isn't there sufficent office space for 30,000+ ambassadors and their staff in the UN building?

There would be...were it not for the rather expansive Department of Useless Committees.

There would be...were it not for the rather expansive Department of Useless Committees.


Wait, nobody claimed the now free openspace, formerly used by the dead UCPL's "International Copyright Organization"

It's LAE's now

Which floor is it?


http://test256.free.fr/UN%20Cards/office.jpg

sorry this is just a private message:
Forgottenlord got a telegram from Pazu-lenny:)

sorry this is just a private message:
Forgottenlord got a telegram from Pazu-lenny:)

*mutters about having log into his account

*mutters about having log into his account

Thanks for your answer, another one sent;)

who the hell was Hualien anyway?

Ahem. A few things.

I got the office, because I claimed to do so directly in the thread created by the leaving nation for that purpose. Standard operating procedure.

This system has been in place since before people even thought of having a UN Pack of Cards, so the 'rule' about playing the card is complete and utter hogwash.

Enn has two offices, because Enn has two UN Consuls. They handle different bits of the operation. Until recently, we had no office at all, due to some strange effects of exotic matter left behind by DLE.

Kirusubo, there has never been sufficient space. Why do you think so many national representatives spend all their time in the Strangers' Bar? Because they don't have offices to go to.
And you try pushing 30,000+ representatives, plus all their staff, into a building only 40 storeys high. That's why there's no space, and why there is always such a kerfuffle when someone leaves.

Now, if we could just work out why new nations get an office, when established ones have to fight, we'd be doing a lot better...

And I got the furniture and all belongings. Except for the singing fish, which I generously left behind.

Lies. I always get the staplers. You can have the staple-remover and the tape dispenser though.
I thought you always took the paper clips to replace the ones that the UN Gnomes are always stealing from you.

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

OK first off, as was stated by Enn the policy of claiming is first come first serve, and since Enn was the first one to claim the office they get it.

hang on here :)

isn't there sufficent office space for 30,000+ ambassadors and their staff in the UN building?In a word, no. You need to remember that not only do we need space for all the ambassadors and their staff, but we also have to have room for the general assembly hall, the Stranger's Bar, conference rooms for drafting proposals, headquarters for all the various committees established by UN resolutions, and as was mentioned there's only 40 stories in the building, not counting the at least 14 basement levels. (we're not sure exactly how many basements this building has as the hostil mutants down there tend to make it difficult for us to explore them completely)

I would ask building mgmt, but where are the servers? I've needed to string a network jack to my office since I first got here - it seems they failed to wire up the basement levels, and I'm in the lowest charted basement to date.We're working on that, please remember that we're massively understaffed. In the meantime you might try using a wireless network connection, I think that you should be able to get a signal down there.

Wait, nobody claimed the now free openspace, formerly used by the dead UCPL's "International Copyright Organization"

It's LAE's now

Which floor is it?OK, it's yours. The office is on the fifth floor.

who the hell was Hualien anyway?I'm not sure, in fact we're still trying to figure out where their offices were?

Now, if we could just work out why new nations get an office, when established ones have to fight, we'd be doing a lot better...Because the new nations don't know about the shortage of space.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

Pazu-Lenny Kasigi-Nero went to the 40th floor, to kiss his wife (Midori Kasigi-Nero, Deputy UN Ambassador of the Empire of Kirisubo)

When he went out of the Kirisuban office at the 40th floor, he bumped on a wall, and dicovered a hidden local UN portal,; at the other side of the portal, he arrived at the magical hidden 69 3/4th floor of the UN building.

There was 4 open-space offices in the magical hidden 69 3/4th floor: North-East corner, South-East corner, South-West corner and North-West Corner.

He then moved LAE's office from the former UCPL's "International Copyright Organization", on the 5th floor he had occupy for few hours into the South-West corner of the magical hidden 69 3/4th floor of the UN building.

I thought you always took the paper clips to replace the ones that the UN Gnomes are always stealing from you.

Bob Flibble
UN RepresentativeIt appears I've been watching Office Space too much lately. So, while you're correct, I'm a Mod, so I'm always correct. Clearly everyone's eyes are messed up as my post quite obviously says "paperclips" and not "stapler". >_>

It appears I've been watching Office Space too much lately. So, while you're correct, I'm a Mod, so I'm always correct. Clearly everyone's eyes are messed up as my post quite obviously says "paperclips" and not "stapler". >_>
Ah, so in other words, "paper clips" is now spelled S-T-A-P-L-E-R.:p

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

Just a few comments, first off we'd like to inform the Ennish delegation that we've finally located the Hualienen(?) office. Unfortunately they're located on the top of one of the express elevator cars so we advise them to use it at their own risk as there's a low ceiling when the car reaches the 40th floor.

Secondly with reguards to Mr. Pazu-Lenny Kasigi-Nero's claim of having discovered a hidden floor 69 and 3/4 in the building, we're confused as you manage to keep from falling down when your almost 30 stories above the roof of the building.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

Just a few comments, first off we'd like to inform the Ennish delegation that we've finally located the Hualienen(?) office. Unfortunately they're located on the top of one of the express elevator cars so we advise them to use it at their own risk as there's a low ceiling when the car reaches the 40th floor.

Secondly with reguards to Mr. Pazu-Lenny Kasigi-Nero's claim of having discovered a hidden floor 69 and 3/4 in the building, we're confused as you manage to keep from falling down when your almost 30 stories above the roof of the building.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management


The UN building is full of surprise, Gnomes, UN Portal, +30 000 seats general assembly, simultaneous traduction in some thousands of languages and yes the invisible-from-outside-floating-in-the-air-69 3/4th floor, only accesible by the local UN portal at the 40th floor....:)

Maybe we should put some external prevention signs or lights to prevent any UN Ambasasdor helicopter to crash in the 69 3/4th floor.:p

Nah, just jump up and down and wave wildly if you see anyone coming.

Hypothetically, if there were offices of UN embassators not physically attached to the UN building, they would not be considered part of said building, right? So if one nation were to accidentally destroy such offices with missiles, that would not be considered a direct attack on the UN, right? Hypothetically, of course...

Hypothetically, if there were offices of UN embassators not physically attached to the UN building, they would not be considered part of said building, right? So if one nation were to accidentally destroy such offices with missiles, that would not be considered a direct attack on the UN, right? Hypothetically, of course...


Interesting question, in fact i don't know if a local UN portal is considered as "a physical attach" or not, so you may be right, or not, i donno

Hmmm...if we were to destroy the portal that leads to this 69 3/4th floor, then he would be trapped in there. Yes?

Hmmm...if we were to destroy the portal that leads to this 69 3/4th floor, then he would be trapped in there. Yes?

Good question also, i donno how to destroy a local UN portal, but i'm certain you will find the solution to do it, maybe this one :gundge:, donno, just try it.

Pazu-lenny brings some parachutes in the South-West office of the 69 4/3th of the UN building. If anyhthing happen to the local UN portal, at least he will have the opportunity to try a "base jump":p

I see. Given the sensible precautions taken by Pazu-lenny, an accident would only be tragically misfortunate if it involved my missiles, Yelda's covert op, and napalm in the rooftop. Any volunteers for the third, hm, accident?

I see. Given the sensible precautions taken by Pazu-lenny, an accident would only be tragically misfortunate if it involved my missiles, Yelda's covert op, and napalm in the rooftop. Any volunteers for the third, hm, accident?

Napalm is a chemical weapon, so it's not banned by the UN since Powerhungry Chipmunks's Repeal "Ban Chemical Weapons", 3 month ago, good idea. I donno much about napalm, will that melt the roof?

I see. Given the sensible precautions taken by Pazu-lenny, an accident would only be tragically misfortunate if it involved my missiles, Yelda's covert op, and napalm in the rooftop. Any volunteers for the third, hm, accident?
Whatever you do, please try not to cause too much collateral damage, after all we do have to repair it/clean it up.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

I see. Given the sensible precautions taken by Pazu-lenny, an accident would only be tragically misfortunate if it involved my missiles, Yelda's covert op, and napalm in the rooftop. Any volunteers for the third, hm, accident?
If I volunteer our.. assistance.. Will I get an office? I really dislike working out a filing cabinet.

Serifina Karin
Ambassador from Karianis

Napalm is a chemical weapon, so it's not banned by the UN since Powerhungry Chipmunks's Repeal "Ban Chemical Weapons", 3 month ago, good idea. I donno much about napalm, will that melt the roof?

Technically, napalm isn't a chemical weapon. It's a defoliant.

Technically, napalm isn't a chemical weapon. It's a defoliant.
they have trialed napalm in Frosbitaria, because normal fires tend to go out in the extreme cold.... havent had any complaints so far, the kebabs have turned out better than expected

Technically, napalm isn't a chemical weapon. It's a defoliant.

Napalm is jellified petrol/gasoline and could well be considered a chemical weapon. It was certainly used as one in Vietnam.

With the defoliant, you aren't thinking of agent orange by any chance? That is the one that many Vietnam veterans blame for health problems.

Napalm is jellified petrol/gasoline and could well be considered a chemical weapon. It was certainly used as one in Vietnam.

With the defoliant, you aren't thinking of agent orange by any chance? That is the one that many Vietnam veterans blame for health problems.

From wikipedia:

""""""There are other chemicals used militarily that are not technically considered to be "chemical weapon agents," such as:

-Incendiary or explosive chemicals (such as napalm, extensively used by the United States in Vietnam, or dynamite) because their destructive effects are primarily due to fire or explosive force, and not direct chemical action.""""""""

So if i understand (not sure), as it effect are mainly explosive, it will probably melt the 69 3/4th roof

To: UN Building Management

Inasmuch as St Edmund's delegation to the UN has yet to be assigned an office within the building, would it be acceptable to you if we kept one of our larger airships more-or-less permanently moored to a spire [whose construction we are perfectly willing to arrange ourselves] on the building's roof to serve this purpose?

Napalm is jellified petrol/gasoline and could well be considered a chemical weapon. It was certainly used as one in Vietnam.Er, no. Napalm is no more a chemical weapon than gunpowder is. And it certainly wasn't used as a 'chemical weapon' in Nam. Actually, much of the time, it was used as a defoliant. Fire gets rid of underbrush quite nicely.

So if i understand (not sure), as it effect are mainly explosive, it will probably melt the 69 3/4th roof

The effect of napalm is mainly incendiary, not explosive. It would probably not melt the roof. And the idea was not using it on the invisible office, it was just to properly mark the landing site (the UN roof below) in case you parachuted off the office after the missile incident.

Er, no. Napalm is no more a chemical weapon than gunpowder is. And it certainly wasn't used as a 'chemical weapon' in Nam. Actually, much of the time, it was used as a defoliant. Fire gets rid of underbrush quite nicely.

I was only going by what my father told me about the effects of napalm during his time over there. He treated a lot of Vietnamese civilians with burns and hated the stuff. I accept the human victims could have just been caught up in it by accident though.

I was only going by what my father told me about the effects of napalm during his time over there. He treated a lot of Vietnamese civilians with burns and hated the stuff. I accept the human victims could have just been caught up in it by accident though.

OOC: The intent in using napalm was to remove foliage in which the VC could hide. Anyone caught in it would be considered "collateral damage."

OOC: The intent in using napalm was to remove foliage in which the VC could hide. Anyone caught in it would be considered "collateral damage."

Exactly. My usage of napalm here would be with the intent of illuminating the roof of the UN building at night, so that any LAE embassators could clearly see the spot where they are supposed to land. Anything else would be collateral damage.

Exactly. My usage of napalm here would be with the intent of illuminating the roof of the UN building at night, so that any LAE embassators could clearly see the spot where they are supposed to land. Anything else would be collateral damage.

I like the way you think. :D

I was only going by what my father told me about the effects of napalm during his time over there. He treated a lot of Vietnamese civilians with burns and hated the stuff. I accept the human victims could have just been caught up in it by accident though.Well, yes, but they weren't chemical burns (like mustard gas would give). Certainly inhumane to use against people, but not a chemical weapon as such are usually defined.

Exactly. My usage of napalm here would be with the intent of illuminating the roof of the UN building at night, so that any LAE embassators could clearly see the spot where they are supposed to land. Anything else would be collateral damage.

If I remember correctly, DLE used to land her spaceship on the roof at times, so if it can withstand that, I guess a bit of napalm won't hurt it.

Well, yes, but they weren't chemical burns (like mustard gas would give). Certainly inhumane to use against people, but not a chemical weapon as such are usually defined.

Fair enough, I understand the difference.

*wonders if Frosbitarian Napalm-Grilled Kebabs would take of as a delicacy

*wonders if Frosbitarian Napalm-Grilled Kebabs would take of as a delicacy
Hell, I'd eat 'em. Yeldans will try anything once.

The effect of napalm is mainly incendiary, not explosive. It would probably not melt the roof. And the idea was not using it on the invisible office, it was just to properly mark the landing site (the UN roof below) in case you parachuted off the office after the missile incident.

In fact Pazu-Lenny was interested to try a base jump from the 69 3/4th to 0, as a jump from 69 3/4th to the roof of the 42th (i suppose as Cluichstan office is at the 42th) is very very short, I think some people had achieved even shorter base jump, but it's pretty rare.

Actually, you'll find that Cluichstan's office is a floating broom closet, in the same manner as the 69 3/4 floor is. However, it seems to have some sort of physical connection, unlike your floor.

The UN Building has 40 floors, plus an unknown number of basement levels.

why don't we just get a tardis and solve the space problem that way? :)

i suppose an alternative is new towerblocks or other office accomdation close to the UN HQ.

breaking news, a rougue terrorist group has begun an assault on Enn's office to claim it for Admiral-Bell.:mp5:

Actually, you'll find that Cluichstan's office is a floating broom closet, in the same manner as the 69 3/4 floor is. However, it seems to have some sort of physical connection, unlike your floor.

The UN Building has 40 floors, plus an unknown number of basement levels.


Ok But even a base jump from 69 3/4th to 40 will be too short, around 100m.

So is Cluichstan's office in the "tank house"?

http://test256.free.fr/tank_house.jpg

breaking news, a rougue terrorist group has begun an assault on Enn's office to claim it for Admiral-Bell.:mp5:
Which office? Enn has two offices, plus a table in the Strangers' Bar. Besides, we waited months for those offices, we're not giving those up without a fight.

Hannah Sikura,
Ennish Consul to the UN.

To: UN Building Management

Inasmuch as St Edmund's delegation to the UN has yet to be assigned an office within the building, would it be acceptable to you if we kept one of our larger airships more-or-less permanently moored to a spire [whose construction we are perfectly willing to arrange ourselves] on the building's roof to serve this purpose?
I see no problems with this arrangement, all we ask is that you have the workers installing the mooring spire sign a waiver in case there are any accidents during the installation (especailly considering some of the other things that seem to be happening, or at least being planned on the roof).

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

I see no problems with this arrangement, all we ask is that you have the workers installing the mooring spire sign a waiver in case there are any accidents during the installation (especailly considering some of the other things that seem to be happening, or at least being planned on the roof).

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management


St Edmund, also for your own security, and for ours, better to inform your pilot of your airship, to be carefull when approaching the UN building, as the 69 3/4th floor is invisible from outside.

i call the paperweight! and minifridge! hahahahahahha! mine! all mine!

breaking news, a rougue terrorist group has begun an assault on Enn's office to claim it for Admiral-Bell.:mp5:

The Rogue Nation of Angel Fire which has been donating a regiment of its elite forces to the Empire of Forgottenlands for defending against attempts by creatures of the lower basements from entering the 14th floor (and therefore, well trained in combat for such environments such as....well....the UN building) will defend Enn's office should this unprovoked attack proceed.

i call the paperweight! and minifridge! hahahahahahha! mine! all mine!

Have you lost it, my friend? That office was plundered days ago... Right now we are plotting unfortunate accidents.

i call the paperweight! and minifridge! hahahahahahha! mine! all mine!

I already claimed the fridge

Ok But even a base jump from 69 3/4th to 40 will be too short, around 100m.

So is Cluichstan's office in the "tank house"?

OOC: After something was pointed out to me on the UNOG forum, I've moved my office to the fifth floor.

i doubt theres anything left from the office in question. the next people who want it will probally have to put in new floorboards and a door :)

why don't we just get a tardis and solve the space problem that way? :)

i suppose an alternative is new towerblocks or other office accomdation close to the UN HQ.
It's T.A.R.D.I.S.

OOC: After something was pointed out to me on the UNOG forum, I've moved my office to the fifth floor.

You right, this one is free, it was the former office of the UCPL's "International Copyright Organization", LAE delegation occupied it only for a couple of hours before moving to the 69 3/4th, it's a nice one.

We forgot to take with us our 102-inch HDTV plasma display, so you can keep it no pb.

http://img.engadget.com/common/images/3060000000048886.JPG

Wait - so all the parties are in Cluichstan's office now?

Wait - so all the parties are in Cluichstan's office now?


As they should be. :cool:

http://img.engadget.com/common/images/3060000000048886.JPG
Of all the things possible to display on a 102" plasma set in UN offices, a green pepper would be fairly low on my list of interesting subjects. 102 diagonal inches of Hack's "King in Yellow" would be horrifying. 102 diagonal inches of a Mikitivity / Powerhungry Chipmunks 'quote battle' would be scary. 102 diagonal inches of Love and esterel's cartoon women would be ... worthwhile, probably. But the fierceness of a pepper?. Scary only in its non-scariness. The tomatoes, on the other hand ...

Of all the things possible to display on a 102" plasma set in UN offices, a green pepper would be fairly low on my list of interesting subjects. 102 diagonal inches of Hack's "King in Yellow" would be horrifying. 102 diagonal inches of a Mikitivity / Powerhungry Chipmunks 'quote battle' would be scary. 102 diagonal inches of Love and esterel's cartoon women would be ... worthwhile, probably. But the fierceness of a pepper?. Scary only in its non-scariness. The tomatoes, on the other hand ...

Well, if you look at it from the right angle, a skull appears to lurk in the reflections... [Or maybe I should stop watching late night TV.]

102 diagonal inches of Hack's "King in Yellow" would be horrifying.Yeah, but your avatar is already cropped for widescreen...

TLA is putting in a request to UN Building Mgmt to place a Frosbitarian Napalm-Grilled Kebab shop on the ground floor, facing onto the street. we are also requestion information on how to obtain suitable office space.

Of all the things possible to display on a 102" plasma set in UN offices, a green pepper would be fairly low on my list of interesting subjects. 102 diagonal inches of Hack's "King in Yellow" would be horrifying. 102 diagonal inches of a Mikitivity / Powerhungry Chipmunks 'quote battle' would be scary. 102 diagonal inches of Love and esterel's cartoon women would be ... worthwhile, probably. But the fierceness of a pepper?. Scary only in its non-scariness. The tomatoes, on the other hand ...


Let see what we have in stock:

http://imageshare.lumunon.com/uploads/6b44-samsung-102-plasma-tv.jpg
http://www.i4u.com/images/samsung_102inch_plasma_tv_cebit.jpg
http://www.mobilewhack.com/images/samsung_102_inch_pdp_tv.jpg
http://test256.free.fr/102-1.jpg
http://test256.free.fr/102-2.jpg

edited by The Most Glorious Hack : Today at 9:09 AM. Reason: When images break frames and grind my 1GIGABIT/sec connection, they're too big.

With the caretaker government of Hualien working on a new constitution, it seems that anti-UN sentiment has hit an all-time high in the Community of Hualien. According to the latest survey, 92% of the citizens of Hualien are opposed to the nation being a member of the United Nations. This is up from 83% in the aftermath of the passage of the "right of divorce" resolution that precipated the coup last week. It appears that the increase has to do with comments on a UN message board that has been covered in print and electronic media that has convinced the people of Hualien that the United Nations is nothing more than a talking shop for the hopelessly immature.

We don't really care.

I get his hat!

With the caretaker government of Hualien working on a new constitution, it seems that anti-UN sentiment has hit an all-time high in the Community of Hualien. According to the latest survey, 92% of the citizens of Hualien are opposed to the nation being a member of the United Nations. This is up from 83% in the aftermath of the passage of the "right of divorce" resolution that precipated the coup last week. It appears that the increase has to do with comments on a UN message board that has been covered in print and electronic media that has convinced the people of Hualien that the United Nations is nothing more than a talking shop for the hopelessly immature.

Did you notice that when you resigned from the UN, we were more concerned about who got your office than the reason you resigned?

TLA: the UN building faces a street? (points to consolidated UN sticky, last post)

Fine, have the office. The government of Hualien 花蓮 has no further use of it.

TLA is putting in a request to UN Building Mgmt to place a Frosbitarian Napalm-Grilled Kebab shop on the ground floor, facing onto the street. we are also requestion information on how to obtain suitable office space.
Unfortunatly we can not allow your request as Neville has an exclusive contract for the Stranger's Bar to be the sole food vendor in the building.

As for your request for information on obtaining office space it's a simple process, you start by filling out these forms (hands the ambassador a stack of papers), in triplicate, (hands over 2 more identical stacks of papers) by hand without the use of carbon paper. Then after you fill out the forms all we'll need to do is run a background check and credit check. Then we'll need a blood sample, DNA sample, stool sample, and urine sample at which time we'll have all we need to begin processing your application. Approximate time to finish processing your application is usually about 2-3 months barring any delays or rejections which could happen at any point in during the processing for any reason. After that your name will be added to the waiting list, and in about 3 years from when you're added to the list you'll have your office.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

P.S. Now you know why no one goes through the official channels when it comes to claiming an office.

thats it then, i am just claiming the office in the south-west corner then!

In the wake of a bloodless military coup sparked at massive Parliamentary and popular anger at the former President for steadfastly keeping the Most Serene Republic of Hualien a member of the United Nations despite its cultural imperialism, the Parliament has just voted overwhelmingly to withdraw from the United Nations, a resolution signed by President Ma Huairen as soon as it crossed his desk. Fromt his moment, Hualien will no longer be a member of the ??? (as it is known locally) due to the imperialistic nature of the organization.


That's so strange, ??? means "Tile on the floor, Stucco on the ceiling" in my language.



It's mostly a real estate term.

That's so strange, ??? means "Tile on the floor, Stucco on the ceiling" in my language.



It's mostly a real estate term.

Hmmm. The government of Hualien would like to advise you to update the software on your computer so you can read the national language of Hualien. 花蓮國語 (note: reading Hualien's national language would necessitate the installation of traditional Chinese software)

thats it then, i am just claiming the office in the south-west corner then!

Of floor?

Of floor?
13th floor, naturally

13th floor, naturally
We're sorry but the UN Strangers Bar occupies the entire 13th floor and I highly doubt that Neville would like you to just come in and claim a portion of his territory.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

We're sorry but the UN Strangers Bar occupies the entire 13th floor and I highly doubt that Neville would like you to just come in and claim a portion of his territory.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management
dang. ground floor then. or sub-basement 13
i thought the strangers bar was on the ground floor

dang. ground floor then. or sub-basement 13I must admit thet I am impressed, you have an uncanny knack for sleecting floors that are completely occupied. The Ground Floor in taken up by the Lobby and the Administrative offices of the IRCO, and sub-basement 13 contains the secret complex of the UNOG.
i thought the strangers bar was on the ground floor
No, there's just an express elevator that takes you from the lobby on the ground floor to the Strangers Bar.

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management

Note: floor 13 and sub-13 you can't exactly reach by any way that one would consider...."normal"..... They aren't exactly hooked into the building the same way all other floors are.

dang, i just cant win. okay, the SW corner, level 31

i doubt theres anything left from the office in question. the next people who want it will probally have to put in new floorboards and a door :)

Has anybody taken the lightbulbs yet?
Not that we want them, I just wondered...

I see no problems with this arrangement, all we ask is that you have the workers installing the mooring spire sign a waiver in case there are any accidents during the installation (especailly considering some of the other things that seem to be happening, or at least being planned on the roof).

William Smithers
Senior VP, UN Building Management


Thank you. The work will be carried out by members of the St Edmundan army's Corps of Engineers, if that's acceptable to you, and the waivers will be collected & shown to you as soon as we've decided exactly which unit to deploy for this purpose.

I must admit thet I am impressed, you have an uncanny knack for sleecting floors that are completely occupied. The Ground Floor in taken up by the Lobby and the Administrative offices of the IRCO, and sub-basement 13 contains the secret complex of the UNOG.

And the representative of the Black New World, in particular, will be extremely angry if anyone takes it upon himself to set up a desk anywhere in the UNOG complex.

Indeed. I shall destroy anyone who steps foot in the UNOG unlawfully.

Indeed. I shall destroy anyone who steps foot in the UNOG unlawfully.

Will they be struck down by lightning, or something more practical in a basement?

I could have Hack eat them. Very efficient. No waste.

I could have Hack eat them. Very efficient. No waste.

Hack doesn't shit? :eek:

Hack doesn't shit? :eek:

Not in UNOG premises, I would assume.

Only in his cage. I believe the gnomes muck him out. I can always get Gruen to though.

To: UN Building Mgmt

Okay, we've decided, this job will be carried out by troops from #5 Airborne Airbase Construction Company -- the famous "Screaming Beagles" -- who are now on their way. Waivers signed by each & every member of this detachment are available for inspection.


************************************

To: Any national governments that might be planning to conduct acts of violence on or above the roof of the UN Building.

Please note the imminent arrival of our [armed] construction team, and take care that your actions do not adversely affect them.

Okay, we've decided, this job will be carried out by troops from #5 Airborne Airbase Construction Company -- the famous "Screaming Beagles" -- who are now on their way. Waivers signed by each & every member of this detachment are available for inspection.


************************************

To: Any national governments that might be planning to conduct acts of violence on or above the roof of the UN Building.

Please note the imminent arrival of our [armed] construction team, and take care that your actions do not adversely affect them.

To: The leader of the St. Edmondian Screaming Beagles.

Our planned napalm coverage of the UN rooftop was designed for the eventuality of the LAE embassators needing additional visibility for a landing. If the [armed] construction team would be willing to light up the roof and provide sound guidance to said embassators, by discharging guns in their general direction, we would happily abandon our plans.

Note that such contingence plans are totally hypothetic, we are simply planning ahead in case the 693/4 floor is accidentally destroyed by our missiles.

Memo

To: UN Building management
From : the Kirisuban UN Mission

I would like to make an enquiry on the availablity of the former pump house building on the roof. If its not already assigned can we move our office from the box room we currently have on the 40th floor up to there?

Ambassador Kaigan Miromuta

Memo

To: UN Building management
From : the Kirisuban UN Mission

I would like to make an enquiry on the availablity of the former pump house building on the roof. If its not already assigned can we move our office from the box room we currently have on the 40th floor up to there?

Ambassador Kaigan Miromuta

You don't have a box room on the 40th. Venerable Libertarians has the 40th.

It is plain that what we need is more space. I propose the construction of a second 40 floor office tower adjacent to the existing one. Yelda will be willing to shoulder a considerable amount of the financial burden of constructing such an office tower.

Department of State
The Federal Republic of OmigodtheykilledkennyNow hear this: The governments of Kirisubo, Fonzoland and St. Edmund by their alarming plans for the roof of the UN Headquarters may be in violation of Sovereign Kenny Territory atop the same. A key part of the rooftop real estate has already been reserved for members of our delegation for smoking breaks and to pelt ambassadors entering the building on the ground floor with coins, pebbles, spitballs, Fine Yeldan Peanuts™, and whatever else is handy. Unless said governments agree to cease and desist of their plans to violate our sovereignty, we will have no choice but to respond with force. As we speak, our very talented Stripper Commandos are being dispatched to the UN Headquarters via our portal to the same in the basement of a crackhouse in Paradise City. We issue this grave warning to all those planning to violate our reserved portion of the rooftop: our Exotic Commandos are equipped with all the necessary endowment and knowhow to force any man to surrender. Unless you're women, or gay, in which case we'll have to deploy our Male Stripper Commandos, a most disturbing unit which we haven't yet had the misfortune of having to dispatch. Please don't make us do it. [shudders]Sincerely,
Alex Tehrani
Secretary of State

Mr. Tehrani,

May I please request that you divert one of your stripper commandos from this mission and send her to my office?

Respectfully,
Sheik Nadnerb bin Cluich
Cluichstani Ambassador to the UN
Regional Delegate from Scybala

Hehehe... I dont know why people argue so much about offices... you can get just as much done in your home nation as you could in an office... just dial yourself home... less walking than getting to a 14th sublevel office. All I need here is my seat in the general assembly hall.

Stant Notten
Representative from Wyvern Falls

You don't have a box room on the 40th. Venerable Libertarians has the 40th.

did i say box room? to be honest its more of a liberated large broom cupboard next to the VL's offices that they weren't using. :)

Mr. Tehrani,

May I please request that you divert one of your stripper commandos from this mission and send her to my office?Sheik bin Chluich:

Furnishing orders to members of our Armed Forces is decidedly outside my jurisdiction as a diplomat. I am empowered, however, to dispatch our vice president (ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php?title=Antigone_Morgan) on diplomatic missions abroad on the president's behalf. I am sure I can find some excuse to send her to your office, to Cluichstan or any other venue where you'd like to arrange a special diplomatic meet-and-greet. Just don't tell her that I'm pimping for her.

~Alex

P.S. I'm talking looky, no touchy here! :p

Alex,

I most certainly appreciate the limitations of your office, and while I am certainly disappointed that I will not have the pleasure of meeting one of your fine nation's commandos, I gladly accept your offer of a visit from Ms. Morgan. Alas, I do not get back to Cluichabad often, but she would be more than welcome to visit me here.

And your secret will be safe with me, my friend.

~Nadnerb

Hehehe... I dont know why people argue so much about offices... you can get just as much done in your home nation as you could in an office... just dial yourself home... less walking than getting to a 14th sublevel office. All I need here is my seat in the general assembly hall.

Stant Notten
Representative from Wyvern Falls
Well some of us, like myself, abhor the idea of teleporting anywhere. In fact we have a saying in The Rogue Nation of Flibbleites reguarding teleporting. It goes like this.
I teleported home one night
With Ron and Sid and Meg.
Ron stole Meggie's heart away
And I got Sidney's leg.

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

To: The leader of the St. Edmondian Screaming Beagles.

Our planned napalm coverage of the UN rooftop was designed for the eventuality of the LAE embassators needing additional visibility for a landing. If the [armed] construction team would be willing to light up the roof and provide sound guidance to said embassators, by discharging guns in their general direction, we would happily abandon our plans.

Note that such contingence plans are totally hypothetic, we are simply planning ahead in case the 693/4 floor is accidentally destroyed by our missiles.


If there's a serious risk of "stray" missiles in the vicinity then, unless the UN Building Management objects, I think that the construction teams will be supplemented by an anti-missile battery.

H'mm, we'd better check just which section of the roof that LAE office is situated above, so that we don't position the mooring spire directly under it...

Department of State
The Federal Republic of OmigodtheykilledkennyNow hear this: The governments of Kirisubo, Fonzoland and St. Edmund by their alarming plans for the roof of the UN Headquarters may be in violation of Sovereign Kenny Territory atop the same. A key part of the rooftop real estate has already been reserved for members of our delegation for smoking breaks and to pelt ambassadors entering the building on the ground floor with coins, pebbles, spitballs, Fine Yeldan Peanuts™, and whatever else is handy. Unless said governments agree to cease and desist of their plans to violate our sovereignty, we will have no choice but to respond with force. As we speak, our very talented Stripper Commandos are being dispatched to the UN Headquarters via our portal to the same in the basement of a crackhouse in Paradise City. We issue this grave warning to all those planning to violate our reserved portion of the rooftop: our Exotic Commandos are equipped with all the necessary endowment and knowhow to force any man to surrender. Unless you're women, or gay, in which case we'll have to deploy our Male Stripper Commandos, a most disturbing unit which we haven't yet had the misfortune of having to dispatch. Please don't make us do it. [shudders]Sincerely,
Alex Tehrani
Secretary of State

"Your" sovereignty? Have you checked with UN Building Management about that?

"Your" sovereignty? Have you checked with UN Building Management about that?

As a diplomatic mission, I should think that offices and workspaces of an individual nation on UN property are considered sovereign territory of the nation occupying them, much the same as an embassy is.

As a diplomatic mission, I should think that offices and workspaces of an individual nation on UN property are considered sovereign territory of the nation occupying them, much the same as an embassy is.


But presumably the allocation of space to which that applied would be known to Building Management, who would have told us if any of the roof was thus-assigned [& where that section's boundaries were] were when they agreed that we could install an airship mooring spire up there?

Well some of us, like myself, abhor the idea of teleporting anywhere. In fact we have a saying in The Rogue Nation of Flibbleites reguarding teleporting. It goes like this.
I teleported home one night
With Ron and Sid and Meg.
Ron stole Meggie's heart away
And I got Sidney's leg.

Bob Flibble
UN Representative
Thats what happens when you teleport whist drunk, boss.

"Your" sovereignty? Have you checked with UN Building Management about that?Sure did, chief. As an oh-so-privileged UNOGger, I, along with all my dungeonmates, got first dibs. Our office on the 9th (?) floor and our rooftop station are now Sovereign Kenny Territory.

look like we'll be moving into floor 69 3/4's as well then since the roofs taken... :p

Sure did, chief. As an oh-so-privileged UNOGger, I, along with all my dungeonmates, got first dibs. Our office on the 9th (?) floor and our rooftop station are now Sovereign Kenny Territory.

Actually, after further thought, our needs shouldn't clash: You seem to be claiming the section above the main entrance, if your remarks about dropping things on other ambassadors as they arrive are to be taken literally, whereas we were planning to site our mooring spire as far away from the main entrance as possible in order to reduce the chance of problems if any of our airships have to release ballast water when docking or undocking. (I've just checked Resolution #53, 'Ballast Water', and that seems loose enough that even if it's taken as applying to airships as well as to surface vessels we shouldn't be in non-compliance if any such incidents occur.) Now if we only knew where the south-west corner is, relative to those two locations, we'd know which of us was at the greater danger of having our people get caught up in the hypothetical "accidents" to Love_and_esterel's ambassador that have been under discussion...
(We're not worried about your staff smoking up there, by the way, because all of our airships use helium rather than hydrogen as their source of lift...)

So UNOG has been given its own offices in the UN Building, has it? Is the same the case for the NSO, too?

So UNOG has been given its own offices in the UN Building, has it? Is the same the case for the NSO, too?We probably have a saloon (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10080359&postcount=19) out back or something ... :D

We are dismayed by the lack of respect for the common good. Specifically, for the accidental elimination of L&E Ambassadors. No further comments from our side.

That was bit of a shame. But it is always up to you.

We probably have a saloon (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10080359&postcount=19) out back or something ... :D

Indeed, and I enjoy spending all of my free time there, knocking back glass after glass of Cluichstani whiskey. :cool:

We probably have a saloon (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=10080359&postcount=19) out back or something ... :D

A saloon?
St Edmund produces a fine variety of Rums*: I'll arrange for some examples to be delivered...



(* or "a variety of fine Rums"...)

(A small tilt-rotor aeroplane whose wings bear the 'leaping dolphin' badge of St Edmund carefully approaches the NSUN Building's roof, and makes a vertical landing on one of the clear areas there. A couple of minutes later a woman wearing a military-style uniform disembarks from the plane, strides across to the building's rooftop entrance, and heads for the Building Management Offices...)

Forgottenlord looked at the year end report. It wasn't good.

Nearly 1000 Angel Fire soldiers and one Night Sister had been killed in the 6 months he had claimed this office - and yet they still hadn't prevented the mutants from reaching the upper levels or stopped them from attacking those who tried to visit his office.

He could not allow this to continue.

Colonel Thompson stood in front of him. He had been charged with commanding the Angel Fire troops that called this office home. Celeste McNair, the head of the Night Sisters, stood, as always, at Forgottenlord's shoulder.

Forgottenlord finished reading the report and set it down. He sat there in a deep thought.

"It'll allow us to set up a contingent of forces large enough to defend the upper levels," Thompson said, referring to his recommendation scrawled at the bottom of the page. "And it wouldn't be too difficult to force them to try and head through our defenses to reach the upper floors."

"What if they try and retake the level?" Celeste enquired.

"I fail to see why that is your concern," the Colonel retored.

"Security is my concern - that includes the happenings of this entire building. If the entire Angel Fire contingent assigned to these offices is taken out, there will be nothing to stop an invasion of the upper levels - and might I remind you that this level will be the first to go and is unquestionably my concern."

The two glared at each other, but Forgottenlord ignored them. After a while, he finally said "Colonel, I approve your recommendation. You may take level B15 when your reinforcements arrive. Celeste, I want you to assign five Night Sisters to go with them."

Colonel Thompson nodded and left the office. Celeste retreated back to the shadows, already fufilling the orders she had been handed.

(A small tilt-rotor aeroplane whose wings bear the 'leaping dolphin' badge of St Edmund carefully approaches the NSUN Building's roof, and makes a vertical landing on one of the clear areas there. A couple of minutes later a woman wearing a military-style uniform disembarks from the plane, strides across to the building's rooftop entrance, and heads for the Building Management Offices...)Riley's cigarette dropped from his mouth as the plane landed and the paramilitary-clad woman disappeared down the stairwell. A threat! A direct threat from the Edmundian forces! He turned to the special operations forces guarding the Kennyite rooftop station. "Nancy, Jessica, you know what to do," he said.

Immediately the commandos sprang to action, a group of them armed with temporary stripper poles, a boombox, strobe lights, their own scandalous outfits and all the goods beneath them heading for the Edmundian craft ...

hang on here :)

isn't there sufficent office space for 30,000+ ambassadors and their staff in the UN building?

Would you like to join an expedition to reclaim DLE's former office from some muties?

TLA is putting in a request to UN Building Mgmt to place a Frosbitarian Napalm-Grilled Kebab shop on the ground floor, facing onto the street. we are also requestion information on how to obtain suitable office space.

Would you also like to help liberate DLE's former office from the Muties? WE could use some help. Venerable Libertarians and the Palentine have control of the lobby and express elevator. Its the rest of the floor that presents a problem.:)

I've gotta come up with a reason for Kenny to send his commandos to my office...

I've gotta come up with a reason for Kenny to send his commandos to my office...

I don't know......my bodyguards (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Forgotten_Territories#Characterstics) do the trick for me.....

(downstairs)

The St Edmundan woman enters the Building Management offices, finds her way to somebody who seems to be in a position of responsibility, and halts in front of his, her or its desk.

"I am Captain Gwendolyn Ingridssdaughter, second-in-command of the 5th Airborne Airbase Construction Company," she tells the person behind that desk. "We have arrived to carry out the agreed work of installing an airship mooring mast on this building's roof, now that our nation's Navigators have found a way through the intervening worlds that our craft could use. I gather you have requested these?" She hands over a bundle of documents. "Here are the necessary waivers, signed by all of the personnel who will be involved in this mission. Our 'Chief LawThane to the Witan' -- umm, I think that translates as 'Attorney-General' -- suggested that as the UN apparently doesn't have its own law-court for such matters any claims would have had to be riased before our own courts, so that waivers which would be valid there should suffice: Is that acceptable to you?"

(In case anybody's wondering, she appears to be of mixed racial origins, and is not entirely unattractive but isn't wearing any make-up & has her hair cut short.)

*************************************

(on the roof)

As the stripper commandos approach the St Edmundan plane its door opens again, and another woman -- this one in an aircrew uniform -- looks out of it at them.
"Would that be the Kennyite Ambassador Riley over there?" she enquires. "If it is then we've got a delivery for him to unload..."

I don't know......my bodyguards (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Forgotten_Territories#Characterstics) do the trick for me.....

We require pics! :D

We require pics! :D

The picture spammer can't provide his own images?

The picture spammer can't provide his own images?

Not of your bodyguards. ;)

Not of your bodyguards. ;)

Well.....I gave you enough detail that you could probably create your own image......


Regardless.....it's not like they'd want you to have their pictures anyways:

The Night Sisters are rarely seen in the open. Those that they protect are always protected, but you would never know it.

(downstairs)

The St Edmundan woman enters the Building Management offices, finds her way to somebody who seems to be in a position of responsibility, and halts in front of his, her or its desk.

"I am Captain Gwendolyn Ingridssdaughter, second-in-command of the 5th Airborne Airbase Construction Company," she tells the person behind that desk. "We have arrived to carry out the agreed work of installing an airship mooring mast on this building's roof, now that our nation's Navigators have found a way through the intervening worlds that our craft could use. I gather you have requested these?" She hands over a bundle of documents. "Here are the necessary waivers, signed by all of the personnel who will be involved in this mission. Our 'Chief LawThane to the Witan' -- umm, I think that translates as 'Attorney-General' -- suggested that as the UN apparently doesn't have its own law-court for such matters any claims would have had to be riased before our own courts, so that waivers which would be valid there should suffice: Is that acceptable to you?"

(In case anybody's wondering, she appears to be of mixed racial origins, and is not entirely unattractive but isn't wearing any make-up & has her hair cut short.)
The receptionist looked up startled, here she was playing solitare on her computer and someone comes up and actually expects her to do work.

"Right, let me see here. How does this thing work?" she said looking at the intercom system like it was a snake threating to bite her. "I believe that Mr. Smithers was responsible for making the needed arrangements I'll just buzz him and you two can take it from there. She hesitently presssed a button on the intercom and said, "Mr. Smithers?"

"No, you want line 5," said the voice on the other end.

"OK, sorry to bother you," she said. She quickly pressed the correct button and sadi, "Mr. Smithers, there's a Captain Gwendolyn Ingridssdaughter here to see you about installing the airship mooring spire to the roof."

"Right, I'll be right out."

Captain Ingridssdaughter assumes a slightly more relaxed pose, and gazes around the office as she waits.

... and waits...

The receptionist looks up and says, "You're welcome to have a seat while you're waiting."

OOC: Sorry for the delay, RL has been busy lately.

The receptionist looks up and says, "You're welcome to have a seat while you're waiting."

OOC: Sorry for the delay, RL has been busy lately.


(OOC: That's okay, RL can keep me a bit too busy sometimes too...)

As the stripper commandos approach the St Edmundan plane its door opens again, and another woman -- this one in an aircrew uniform -- looks out of it at them.
"Would that be the Kennyite Ambassador Riley over there?" she enquires. "If it is then we've got a delivery for him to unload...""Ooooooo!! A present!" Riley shrieks with glee as he races over to the Edmundan craft, giggling and jumping up and down excitedly like a kid on Christmas morning. "What is it? What is it??"

"Ooooooo!! A present!" Riley shrieks with glee as he races over to the Edmundan craft, giggling and jumping up and down excitedly like a kid on Christmas morning. "What is it? What is it??"


"It's this box here," the airwoman says, pulling a small crate -- about 2 cubic feet in volume -- to the doorway. "I'm not sure exactly what's in it, but it's quite heavy for its size. If you'll just sign this receipt" (she picks up a clipboard that was resting on top of the crate, checks that there's a pen attached, and proffers it to Riley) "then I'll hand it over..."

(If Riley bothers to check before signing then the receipt is just a standard form for acknowledging a transfer of goods, with no possibly-tricky small print involved.)

Riley signs the form without even looking at it. "Now gimme, gimme, gimme!" he demands of the woman. The commandos stand in position behind him, poised to respond if the package turns out to be anything but an innocuous gesture.

Riley signs the form without even looking at it. "Now gimme, gimme, gimme!" he demands of the woman. The commandos stand in position behind him, poised to respond if the package turns out to be anything but an innocuous gesture.


"It's all yours," she replies as she steps back from the doorway [leaving the crate there] and puts the clipboard & receipt into a cabinet. She turns back to face him, instead of retreating further inside the plane.


(The crate is approximately 2 feet long, 1 foot wide & 1 foot high, with a rope handle at each end. Its lid is held in place by cords that are wrapped right around the box and tied in a fancy bow above it. If Riley decides to lift it before opening the lid then it is moderately heavy, at about 35 pounds weight...)

Riley tears through the binding and opens the lid ...

Riley tears through the binding and opens the lid ...

Inside the box, a letter addressed to Riley is resting on top of a sheet of wrapping paper. The letter says _

Dear Ambassador Riley,
The Government of St Edmund has decided to send you the enclosed items as a sign of respect for the work that you have done within the UN to serve not just your own country but the cause of National Sovereignity as well, and also (as we're trying to expand our export trade) in the hope that if you enjoy these products you will recommend them to your friends & colleagues...
We hope that you will choose to pass the individually-wrapped bottles on to other people, as presents or even as inducements for them to vote on a pro-NatSov basis in UN Resolutions.
Enjoy!

Edward Haroldsson,
Firstthane for Outsidestuff.


Under the wrapping paper he will find a case of 105%-proof* 'Fine Old Navy Rum' , half a dozen individually gift-wrapped bottles which are the right size & shape to be more of the same (& which have blank labels attached to their necks by ribbons, in case he does decide to pass them on to other people instead of keeping them), a metal tin containing 24 'Prime Grade' St Edmundan cigars "hand-rolled on the thighs of tropical maidens", and a 1-lb bag of coffee beans that's labelled as coming from somewhere called 'Morgania'.



(* OOC: and that's measured on the same scale as was used in RL Britain until quite recently, where pure alcohol is only 175% proof, rather than the RL USAn scale where it's 200%...)

Meanwhile in the UN Building Management offices

William hurries in carrying a large manila envelope. “Ah, Captain Ingridssdaughter, I’m William Smithers, Senior Vice-President of UN Building Management. I’m terribly sorry about the delay, first I had to talk with the tech staff to try to find out why the big board was showing delegates as having both voted for and against a resolution. Once that was taken care of I then couldn’t find where I had put the waivers for your crew to sign. Anyway here are the waivers,” he said handing over the envelope, “It’s you standard indemnity form stating that if any of your crew is injured, killed, tentacle raped, or maimed in any way shape or form while installing the mooring spire that neither the UN Building Management nor the United Nations itself can be held liable. We had the NSUN Lawyers draw them up so I’m sure that they are perfectly legal. Just have your crew sign them and flag down a UN gnome to return them to us, it’s not like they’re doing anything else right now.

Now, if you’ll excuse me I’ve got to run as the Senior Management is having a meeting in five minutes and I need to be there.”

Meanwhile in the UN Building Management offices

William hurries in carrying a large manila envelope. “Ah, Captain Ingridssdaughter, I’m William Smithers, Senior Vice-President of UN Building Management. I’m terribly sorry about the delay, first I had to talk with the tech staff to try to find out why the big board was showing delegates as having both voted for and against a resolution. Once that was taken care of I then couldn’t find where I had put the waivers for your crew to sign. Anyway here are the waivers,” he said handing over the envelope, “It’s you standard indemnity form stating that if any of your crew is injured, killed, tentacle raped, or maimed in any way shape or form while installing the mooring spire that neither the UN Building Management nor the United Nations itself can be held liable. We had the NSUN Lawyers draw them up so I’m sure that they are perfectly legal. Just have your crew sign them and flag down a UN gnome to return them to us, it’s not like they’re doing anything else right now.

Now, if you’ll excuse me I’ve got to run as the Senior Management is having a meeting in five minutes and I need to be there.”


"I'll have to run them past our delegation's legal advisor first, and assuming that she agrees they're acceptable the signed copies will be returned quite shortly."

(Several days later...)

Captain Ingridssdaughter returns to the Building Management Offices, and asks to see Mr Smithers again.

(Continuing from post 142)

Colonel Thompson scowled. He had been given a delay of an entire month. In the time, the UN Bulding Management had decided to evacuate the lower 6 levels - letting mutants reclaim all the way up to B-9 - with the offices of his responsibility being moved up to B-8.

He wasn't even granted clearance to proceed with a mission to hold B-9 and just keep it in place as a buffer zone.

Now he had approval, and 250 troops at his disposal for the combat on the stairs. Another 500 were ready to enter through the portals and run down to join the battle should they be needed (and he was sure they would be needed). He couldn't get the elevators, but hadn't expected to be able to. The stairs would have to do

At least I didn't have to run up 20 flights of stairs to clear out a floor like Palentine and Venerable Libertarians did

He waved his first squad to proceed. They dropped grenades to clear out the mutants that always haunted the stairs. After the shrieks subsided, they ran down. A Night Sister ran down behind them, followed closly by another 2 squads.

It had begun.

(OOC: someone play the mutants - please?)

(On the roof...)

Several more tilt-rotor planes bearing St Edmundan insignia arrive, one-by-one, land briefly to discharge passengers & some crates, and then take off again. (They are appearing from, & disappearing back into, a large cloud that seems to be hovering in one place -- about a couple of miles away from the building -- despite the wind...) Some of the personnel whom they've deposited on the roof unpack various equipment from the crates and set up a post-&-wire fence around the area involved, then stand as sentries just inside this: Another group of them begins to mark out a design on part of the enclosed section of rooftop.

Attn: UN Building Management

It has come to our attention (courtesy of the UN Building layout (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/UN_Building)) that there is an abandoned office on floor 20, apparently one of the former offices of Enn. We're not interested with dealing with the strange creatures in Enn's other office (on 29), but could we take control of the office on the 20th floor?

Acolyte Gaeblyn and Johannes,
Darsomiri representatives to the UN

(On the roof...)


Work on the 'mooring mast' continues...

(On the roof...)

The men & women of the 'Screaming Beagles', working with practiced efficiency, have already erected the main structure of the mast -- using prefabricated sections, which were brought in & lowered into place by helicopters -- and anchored this firmly to the building's main structure. They are now installing a lift to carry people between the roof & the platform at the mast's top, with a staircase spiralling around the lift-shaft.



________________________________________________________________

(OOC: There are some negotiations with UN Building Management that I'd still like to RP, but they'd probably have been completed by now so if we do get around to discussing the matters concerned I'd say that the conversation actually took place a few days before this...)

(Several days later...)

Captain Ingridssdaughter returns to the Building Management Offices, and asks to see Mr Smithers again.
The receptionist looks up and says, "I'm sorry, Mr. Smithers is currently in an emergency meeting of the Board of Directors reguarding the loss of several levels of basement to the mutants and cannot be disturbed at this time.

OOC: Sorry for the delay, computer problems kept me offline until now.

The receptionist looks up and says, "I'm sorry, Mr. Smithers is currently in an emergency meeting of the Board of Directors reguarding the loss of several levels of basement to the mutants and cannot be disturbed at this time.

OOC: Sorry for the delay, computer problems kept me offline until now.

OOC: Understood. Send me a 'telegram' when you're able to continue with this conversation...

(On B-9)

Private Al Burnaby had so far not seen much action. There was one day when both the shift before and the shift after him had repelled a mutant invasion but he hadn't seen a single one so far. When he heard that he would be on the third team, he had become a bit deflated, believing he wouldn't see battle.

However, Team 3 was called up almost as soon as the landing had been secured. Team 1 held the landing, Team 2 had moved off down the main corridor, Team 4 was covering the first intersection, Team 5 covering the second.

Team 3 got the task of emptying rooms.

Again Burnaby was sure he would never see any action. All the doors were locked, the mutants would be crazy to hold up in them. He turned to the next door, the third he had done. They hadn't seen any mutants yet.

He rammed the door only to find himself looking into the three eyes of some creature that was quite clearly filled with rage.

He didn't see the clawed hand come up to his chin, just felt where it punctured his skin. He was aware that his teammates were firing and heard the screams of a mutant - though he could see it was not this one screaming.

He tried to bring the gun up to his assailant's chest. He tried to pull the trigger.

He was buried a coward, a soldier who had never once pulled the trigger in battle.

----------------

By the 9th door, Team 3 was doing badly. They had lost two men on the seventh door, including Pte Burnaby, with only three mutants in the room. The other 4 were not ready for the last door before the first intersection.

Cpl Hanks looked at his men. "Remember, pull back, give everyone a clear shot. Don't barge in, don't block everyone else's line of fire."

That had been why Pte Joules had died - stood in the doorway while trying to gun down the two mutants not focused on Burnaby. Problem was, they could take a beating and if they weren't being shot, they didn't care. Hanks wasn't able to get a clear shot so Joules found a mutant on top of him.

The way it had attacked wasn't a form of self-defense - the mutant was hunting. It was looking for its dinner. The realization of this had disturbed the team more than losing two friends.

Gathering himself, Joules kicked at the 8th door.

(OOC: Are these mutant humans? Mutant gnomes? What?)

(OOC: Are these mutant humans? Mutant gnomes? What?)

(OOC: I've never heard more explaination than "mutants". Though the one that Burnaby ran across was his height and had three eyes - for all we know, they're not mutants at all but Renalgors from some distant planet that crashlanded in the UN basement while trying to gather information for potential invasion and now inhabit the lower levels, trying to dismantle the one possible body that could rally the world against them. That doesn't explain the choice to attack as if looking for prey.....maybe their rations ran out, I don't know. Someone portray them and write their story for me.)

...for all we know, they're not mutants at all but Renalgors from some distant planet that crashlanded in the UN basement while trying to gather information for potential invasion and now inhabit the lower levels, trying to dismantle the one possible body that could rally the world against them...

No, that's the UN Old Guard in the basement, and its apparent aim of late has been the exact opposite.

No, that's the UN Old Guard in the basement, and its apparent aim of late has been the exact opposite.

Cluich, do me a favor

Stop sniping the Old Guard whenever you have the opportunity.

Cluich, do me a favor

Stop sniping the Old Guard whenever you have the opportunity.

I do believe that was my first "snipe" on these forums. :p

I do believe that was my first "snipe" on these forums. :p

*checks*

Hmm....I thought you had another, but I think I'm confusing it with your snipe at Reclaimation.

(OOC: Are these mutant humans? Mutant gnomes? What?)
Take it from someone who used to have his office down in the basements, you don't want to know.

Bob Flibble
UN Representative

*checks*

Hmm....I thought you had another, but I think I'm confusing it with your snipe at Reclaimation.

Ah, yes, well, I have made a few of those. ;)

OOC: Understood. Send me a 'telegram' when you're able to continue with this conversation...
OOC: Oh, I am back, it's just that Mr. Smithers and the rest of the Board of Directors are busy grilling the Maintance of Order Department in an attempt to figure out how the mutants managed to retake the basements levels and how their going to take them back. Heck, if it wasn't a closed door meeting I'd probably post it here.

From Jamie MacDougall, Speaker to the UN for Aberdeen
To UN Building Management Board of Directors

I am informing you that Angel Fire troops are annexing the offices they clear on level B-9. This claim will last for as long as the troops need to hold offices on that floor (to keep the mutants at bay).

We would also like to offer our services to clear further levels in the complex - for a fee, of course. We may expand further down at a natural pace for free (freeing up offices above us as we go), but anything faster than that will come with a price tag on it.

The price is 10 000 Angels per floor plus 5000 for each soldier lost. We do not expect subsidies for injured or standing detail.

We would also like to maintain the Aberdeen offices on the lowest level ceded to office space at any given time. Failure to comply with this request will mean the ceasation of any natural expansion into lower sub-basements.

Sincerely,
Jamie MacDonald
Secretary to the UN for Aberdeen

OOC: Oh, I am back, it's just that Mr. Smithers and the rest of the Board of Directors are busy grilling the Maintance of Order Department in an attempt to figure out how the mutants managed to retake the basements levels and how their going to take them back. Heck, if it wasn't a closed door meeting I'd probably post it here.

OOC: Okay. When Mr Smithers can get back -- or somebody else has been assigned to handle the matter -- Captain Ingridssdaughter explains that our mission's legal advisers have trouble with this clause of the waivers that you provided:

that if any of your crew is injured, killed, tentacle raped, or maimed in any way shape or form while installing the mooring spire that neither the UN Building Management nor the United Nations itself can be held liable.

as they would like to know whether that is still supposed to be the case if whatever beings might assault any of our personnel are actually employees of either the UN Building Management nor the United Nations: If the UN denies responsibility for any such actions on its employees' behalf then can we please have a signed agreement that there also won't be any lawsuits brought about any injuries that our personnel might cause to any UN employees who go near the work in progress?

Following the recent passage of #147 Abortion Legality Convention, the senate of Love and esterel voted today for the withdrawal of the UN at 78.3% to protest against it.

Few minutes later, the government of Love and esterel resigned from the UN, and sent a communiqué saying that Love and esterel cannot stay in an international body which by #147 show it’s more concerned to not disturb governments, including some psychotic dictators, than to protect and help people, in particular women.

In the same communiqué, the government of Love and esterel, said it will not use anymore its office at the sout-west corner of the 69th 3/4 floor of the UN building, and that anyone can bagsy it.

I do not bagsie his office. Too vulnerable.

I BAGSY!

I need a lounge for the CPESL servicewomen. :cool:

Captain Ingridssdaughter explains that our mission's legal advisers have trouble with this clause of the waivers that you provided:
that if any of your crew is injured, killed, tentacle raped, or maimed in any way shape or form while installing the mooring spire that neither the UN Building Management nor the United Nations itself can be held liable.
as they would like to know whether that is still supposed to be the case if whatever beings might assault any of our personnel are actually employees of either the UN Building Management nor the United Nations: If the UN denies responsibility for any such actions on its employees' behalf then can we please have a signed agreement that there also won't be any lawsuits brought about any injuries that our personnel might cause to any UN employees who go near the work in progress?
First off, let me assure you that if any UN Building Management personnel is found to have pysically attacked any member of your crew then we will hold them fully accountable for their actions, as for UN employees, to my knowledge the only employees they have are the gnomes and they're harmless as long as you don't bother them. Secondly the clause you quote is more aimed at preventing us, that being the UN and the UN Building Management, from being sued should any of your crew accidently get injured or killed from either negligence on their part, an accident, running afoul of any of the mutants that inhabit the building, etc..

I hope that this clears up any confusion.

Joan Berry
Legal Department
UN Building Management

Meanwhile in the UN Building Management boardroom.

“O’Neil! You better have a damn good explanation of just how the hell you managed to lose control of 6 floors of basement to the mutants,” demanded William Smithers.

“Well Sir, the mutants haven’t been very active lately so we thought that we could get by with having the Maintence of Order Department Squads do fewer patrols down there,” replied Patrick O’Neil (Head of the Maintence of Order Department).

“In other words, your guys got lazy,” interrupted the head of the IT department, Charles Gates.

“Hey! Our Maintence of Order Department Squads are not lazy,” O’Neil shot back.

“Then how come our request for a squad to find out and deal with whatever has been eating the network cables down on B7 has been ignored for over a month now?”

“You know as well as I do that we simply do not have the manpower we need to deal with that problem at this time!”

“Face the facts, ever since UN DEFCON was formed your entire department has been slacking off!”

“Gentlemen, and I use that term loosely in this case, calm down,” Smithers said as the boardroom’s door slowly opened. “Who the hell dares interrupt this meeting of the Board of Directors?”

“Uh, Pete Grey, sir, I uh, work down in the mailroom. I have an urgent message to deliver to Mr. O’Neil.”

“Well deliver it and get out,” Smithers said. After Pete left the room he turned to Natasha Smith (Director of Human Resources) and said, “Fire that man.”

“Mr. Smithers, I believe that I may have a solution for our basement problems,” said O’Neil suddenly.

“What do you mean?”

“It’s the message I just reiceved, here I’ll read it to the entire board.”
From Jamie MacDougall, Speaker to the UN for Aberdeen
To UN Building Management Board of Directors

I am informing you that Angel Fire troops are annexing the offices they clear on level B-9. This claim will last for as long as the troops need to hold offices on that floor (to keep the mutants at bay).

We would also like to offer our services to clear further levels in the complex - for a fee, of course. We may expand further down at a natural pace for free (freeing up offices above us as we go), but anything faster than that will come with a price tag on it.

The price is 10 000 Angels per floor plus 5000 for each soldier lost. We do not expect subsidies for injured or standing detail.

We would also like to maintain the Aberdeen offices on the lowest level ceded to office space at any given time. Failure to comply with this request will mean the ceasation of any natural expansion into lower sub-basements.

Sincerely,
Jamie MacDonald
Secretary to the UN for Aberdeen

“Are you seriously suggesting that we hire these troops to clear out the basements for us?” asked Natasha Smith.

“Why not? It will get the job done faster than we can by ourselves. And we can retake the lost floors with minimum loss of UN Building Management personnel.”

“I give you a good reason why not,” said a voice from the end of the table, “it will put a serious crimp in our budget.”

“Ah, I was wondering when Accounting was going to complain about this idea.”

“Well we have a right to, after all, you’re talking about an idea that could very well drain our entire budget for the rest of the fiscal year and quite possibly longer,” stated Susan Park (Accounting Supervisor).

“How much do you think that this will cost us?” asked Smithers.

“Well we’re looking at seven floors so that’s 70,000 right there, plus costs for lost soldiers and in order to figure that I’d need a casualty estimate.”

“Give me a second and I’ll see what kinds of mutants are on those floors,” said O’Neil. “What the hell? All right, would someone care to explain why I can’t pull up the security feeds on any floor below B6? Charles, Ken that’s one of your guys’ departments.”

“We’ve got the cables for the security cameras strung up through B9, however apparently the same critters that are eating the network cables on B7 also have a taste for the security camera cables,” replied Ken Scott (Building Maintence).

“Told you, you needed to take care of that,” said Charles smugly.

“Shut up,” said O’Neil, “well without knowing what mutants are down there I can’t give an accurate casualty estimate, sorry.”

“OK then, I’ll have to make due with what I have. Taking into account exchange rates your looking at half you budget for the rest of the year on this endeavor,” stated Susan, “think you can get by on that.”

“Probably, if it wasn’t for this damn hiring freeze my department’s under,” replied O’Neil while glaring over at Natasha.

“Well, maybe if your employees didn’t have a life expectancy worse than that of a Spinal Tap drummer you wouldn’t be in this mess,” replied Natasha.

“I’ll contribute,” said James Gould (VP, Supplies & Logistics). “We’ve got a storeroom down on B11 that we need to get into, we keep the Strangers Bar’s supply of G39 down there and if we don’t get it moved to the bar soon they’re probably going to run out. As much as I hate to admit that.”

“Alright then, I move that we hire the Angel Fire troops to clear out the basements down to B15 using funds from the Maintence of Order and Supplies & Logistics department’s budgets,” said O’Neil.

“Second,” said James.

“OK then, it has been moved and seconded that we hire Angel Fire troops to clear out the basements down to B15 using funds from the Maintence of Order and Supplies & Logistics departments budgets. Any discussion?” said Smithers.

“I think we already had it,” said Woody Adams (VP, Communications).

“Anyway, hearing none, proceed to vote.” At this the board members picked up their voting devices and proceeded to cast their votes. “OK the voting is complete and the results are 8 Aye, 4 Nay, 1 Abstain. The motion passes, Woody, please have someone from your department inform the necessary parties. With no more business I declare this emergency meeting of the board of directors over.”

i cant find my firest comment it make me made

On behalf of the UN DEFCON, I must deny any responsibility for the current problem with mutants in the basement. DEFCON did not place the mutants in the basement, nor did the organisation encourage employees of UN building management to "slack off." I am sure that more than a few DEFCON members would be willing to assiting in eradicating the mutant menace that has infested the basement should a request for such assistance be made.

Cordially,
Defense Minister Sheik Nottap bin Cluich

To UN Building Management Board of Directors
From Jamie MacDougall, Speaker to the UN for Aberdeen

I would like to clarify a few things:
1) Judging from the numbers you have indicated, am I to assume this operation is to AND including B15?
2) I should also note that B9 is free as this was ordered to proceed before we began our operations. We expect to be finished with B9 this week and can give you the casualty figures so you can gauge an approximate for the rest of the levels. We do not expect compensation for losses on B9, this is merely for your estimation purposes only.

I cannot, at this time, give you an estimate for when our forces will be able to complete the mission. The manpower needed has been approved by the Forgotten Council, but we are uncertain when we can move it into the building. I shall try to keep you updated as the situation develops.

On behalf of the UN DEFCON, I must deny any responsibility for the current problem with mutants in the basement. DEFCON did not place the mutants in the basement, nor did the organisation encourage employees of UN building management to "slack off." I am sure that more than a few DEFCON members would be willing to assiting in eradicating the mutant menace that has infested the basement should a request for such assistance be made.


OOC: I'm a little bit surprised that [apparently] none of us has tried turning them into a puppet yet... ;)

First off, let me assure you that if any UN Building Management personnel is found to have pysically attacked any member of your crew then we will hold them fully accountable for their actions, as for UN employees, to my knowledge the only employees they have are the gnomes and they're harmless as long as you don't bother them. Secondly the clause you quote is more aimed at preventing us, that being the UN and the UN Building Management, from being sued should any of your crew accidently get injured or killed from either negligence on their part, an accident, running afoul of any of the mutants that inhabit the building, etc..

I hope that this clears up any confusion.

Joan Berry
Legal Department
UN Building Management


Fine, this does seem to settle our people's concerns over that clause.
Now, we also want to check about linking the spire into the building's existing power, water & waste networks: We can install facilities of our own for those matters of course, and would be doing so in order to have back-ups available anyway, but if you'll let us use your systems as our main ones then that would be convenient. If it's acceptable, would you care to send one of your staff up to the roof -- now that the question of mutual safety has been answered -- to show us where to make the connections?

OOC: I'm a little bit surprised that [apparently] none of us has tried turning them into a puppet yet... ;)

Take a look in the Antarctic Oasis. ;)

Take a look in the Antarctic Oasis. ;)

Ah. I'd expected that if such a nation existed it would be in (or under ;) ) 'The Halls of the UN'...

Ah. I'd expected that if such a nation existed it would be in (or under ;) ) 'The Halls of the UN'...

Hadn't even thought of that.

I BAGSY!

I need a lounge for the CPESL servicewomen. :cool:

H'mm, he was actually only using about a quarter of that floor, wasn't he?
St Edmund will bagsy another corner of it, as a lounge for the groundcrew who'll be assigned to our mooring mast... and if Building Management hasn't arranged an office for the IMO yet then we'd like to reserve the rest of the floor for their use until a better site is made available.

OOC: I'm replying to a bunch of people here so just look for your name.
On behalf of the UN DEFCON, I must deny any responsibility for the current problem with mutants in the basement. DEFCON did not place the mutants in the basement, nor did the organisation encourage employees of UN building management to "slack off." I am sure that more than a few DEFCON members would be willing to assiting in eradicating the mutant menace that has infested the basement should a request for such assistance be made.

Cordially,
Defense Minister Sheik Nottap bin Cluich
I never said that UN DEFCON put the mutants in the basement, hell they were here long before UN DEFCON even existed, nor did I say that DEFCON encourged the Maintence of Order Department to slack off, I was simply pointing out that ever since DEFCON's formation that the Maintence of Order Department Squads have not been performing their jobs as well as they were previously.

Charles Gates
Vice President, IT Department
UN Building Management

To UN Building Management Board of Directors
From Jamie MacDougall, Speaker to the UN for Aberdeen

I would like to clarify a few things:
1) Judging from the numbers you have indicated, am I to assume this operation is to AND including B15?
2) I should also note that B9 is free as this was ordered to proceed before we began our operations. We expect to be finished with B9 this week and can give you the casualty figures so you can gauge an approximate for the rest of the levels. We do not expect compensation for losses on B9, this is merely for your estimation purposes only.

I cannot, at this time, give you an estimate for when our forces will be able to complete the mission. The manpower needed has been approved by the Forgotten Council, but we are uncertain when we can move it into the building. I shall try to keep you updated as the situation develops.
Whoops, that was supposed to say B14, apparently the secretary for the Board of Directors made a typo there. And we will gladly accept the casualty figures for B9 to allow us to get an estimation on what this operation will cost.

Patrick O'Neil
Head of the Maintence of Order Department
UN Building Management

Now, we also want to check about linking the spire into the building's existing power, water & waste networks: We can install facilities of our own for those matters of course, and would be doing so in order to have back-ups available anyway, but if you'll let us use your systems as our main ones then that would be convenient. If it's acceptable, would you care to send one of your staff up to the roof -- now that the question of mutual safety has been answered -- to show us where to make the connections?Of course, we'll send up a maintence worker to show you how to make the connection whenever you're ready.

Ken Scott
VP, Building Maintence
UN Building Management

H'mm, he was actually only using about a quarter of that floor, wasn't he?
St Edmund will bagsy another corner of it, as a lounge for the groundcrew who'll be assigned to our mooring mast... and if Building Management hasn't arranged an office for the IMO yet then we'd like to reserve the rest of the floor for their use until a better site is made available.
Actually as that floor is not phsically connected to the rest of the UN Building we don't consider it to be a part of the building.

Lucy Jones
Directory Maintence
UN Building Management

Mr. Smithers,
The Palentine has desided to offer some weapon upgrades for your security department. Actually it is Imperial Palentine Amalgamated Arms, that shall give the upgrade. Enclosed is some, .50 cal "Ma Deuce" MGs, A few crates of BARs, 2 cases of CZ-&5 auto pistols, 3 flamethowers, 4 M-79 grenade launchers, 5 crates of gernades, plus the Ammo needed for the weapons. In return for these upgrades, The palentine would like an office on the thirs floor, with a firing range(the delegation also get free stuff to try out). Also please accept the help of a Platoon of Palentine Marines, to help deal with the mutie scum.
Excelsior,
Lord Julius
Prime Minister

A Marine Master Gunnery sergent Handed the letter to Mr. Smithers. Behind the Gunny was a bunch of crates, and a fully armed Marine Platoon.

(Continuing from 174)

Level B-9

Main Corridor->right at Intersection 4, 3rd Corridor.

She moved with a purpose. Night Sisters were known within the Angel Fire command structure to be rather unreliable. Certainly, when they fought alongside, they were the most valuable soldier on the battlefield, but getting them to commit to the battle was a struggle. Only 3 people could force them to do anything, and not one of them was in the Angel Fire military.

Rebecca Louise, a Night Sister Warrior, moved with a rigid poise. They had cleared out the rooms off the main corridor and gone down both ends from the first intersection. They had been working on the corridor from the second intersection since. Only a dozen mutants had been in the halls, but nearly 50 had been found in the rooms

How they got there, the military could only begin to guess. The doors, as far as they could tell, were all locked (they had stopped checking after the 30th door).

The corridors showed all the signs of the current inhabitants - blood and goo littered the walls, various body parts could be found every so often. Once in a while, they ran across a mutant that was dead - and it wasn't due to anything they had done.

Rebecca stopped. She had sensed something.

She backed up two steps to the door she had just passed.

She didn't check the lock, she just kicked the door in. She was greeted by an almight roar - something didn't like having door in its face.

She crouched low, ducking the returned wooden slab and launched herself. This mutant had 5 eyes, and each of its arms had split at the elbow so it had 4 hands. Its skin had turned an ugly dark grey and had puffed out. She was certain that a 6th eye lay beneath the skin somewhere. She signalled the Angel Fire troops to hold fire

As the 6'5" beast charged out, she flew left and avoided it's right arms swishing over her head. She rolled and brought up her own fire arm. One, two, three eyes burst as her bullets went flying. She couldn't grab the other two before she had to dodge a kick. She pulled her knife as she spun around behind the beast, jabbing twice but receiving nothing in the recognition of her attacks. She jumped and did a horizontal slash across the back of its neck, this time getting a response.

She didn't get to land before two arms finally found her and slapped her in midair. She would've flown to the main cooridor. Instead, she hit a doorframe and spun to the ground before she had gone too far. She could feel the damage to her ribs and pleaded to the collective to help ease her pain. Her request was answered and she was again able to focus again on the monster bearing down on her. She brought her gun up again, taking out the last two eyes.

The monster roared, unable to comprehend the depths of blindness. It tried to run to where he last had seen her, but she moved underneath its legs, popping up behind it as it swept at the ground where she once was. She jumped on its back - knowing that it couldn't feel her there. She jabbed once, twice, three times, hunting desperately for the heart that should've been there.

Blood started gushing out. The monster, starting to comprehend what was happening, started screaming again. Instead of trying to attack her - for it couldn't tell what the source of its troubles was - it started banging against the walls. It couldn't deal with the pain it had never understood.

Rebecca jumped off and got clear of the beast. As it roared and hollered and banged on the walls, leaving various dents and cracks, she gave the signal to the troops. Gun fire erupted and a pain the monster was much more familiar with overwhelmed the beast. A sad whimper of defeat, and it collapsed.

That was pathetic! The first thing I run into knocks me out of commission for months!

She lay down and gave a signal that she'd need a medic. Celeste was not going to be pleased.

Of course, we'll send up a maintence worker to show you how to make the connection whenever you're ready.

Ken Scott
VP, Building Maintence
UN Building Management

Excellent. Everything else should be in place by the end of this week, so we'll probably be back in touch around then.

Actually as that floor is not phsically connected to the rest of the UN Building we don't consider it to be a part of the building.

Lucy Jones
Directory Maintence
UN Building Management

Okay, in that case we'll start moving our people into the section that we've claimed later on today.
By the way, has the IMO -- which, after all, is an official UN agency -- been assigned office space within the main section of the building yet?

(On the roof...)

The lift-shaft & stairs have been completed, the outside of the mooring-mast has been given a covering of weather-proof panels with a few windows here & there, and one team from the 'Screaming Beagles' is working on the platform at the top of the spire -- where a dome has been added to hold the top of the lift-shaft and various systems (such as the lift's motors, and an automated weather-station whose data will of course be copied directly to the IMO) -- whilst most of their colleagues are down by the base of the mast putting prefabricated components together to construct an extension for this facility on a small part of the main buillding's roof.

I call dibs on the hot female secretarys and her bi sexual roommates.

I call dibs on the hot female secretarys and her bi sexual roommates.
Hire your own!!!!

May The Beltway bagsy one-sixteenth of the remaining floor space of Hualien's old offices? We'll claim a corner office, if possible...

May The Beltway bagsy one-sixteenth of the remaining floor space of Hualien's old offices? We'll claim a corner office, if possible...

Hualien's old office was reassigned to Enn, back in December, but turned out to be just the space on top of one of the express elevator cars anyway: What we're actually sharing out at the moment is a "magical, hidden, 69 3/4th" floor which the ambassador from 'Love and esterel' found via a portal from the 40th floor... This is hovering some distance above the Building proper, because the aforementioned 40th floor is in fact the last one below the roof...

Well, office space is office space, so shift my claim to the 69.75 floor...

He had chatted up a young female staffer from 'Love and Esterel,' and from there made his way to the portal. Obviously, he couldn't tell his wife that; she still remembered those peccadillos of the past. Nevertheless, he had found a means to get to the sixty-nine and three-fourths floor of the forty-story UN building. It was a bit odd, standing literally above the UN building, but he accepted it. Bill Clinton had lived through a lot; surely, he could accept living and working almost thirty stories above the UN building itself. Of course, a bit more office space would have been useful...

(OOC: Unless Bill Clinton is the former President of your nation, he never existed)

OOC - In a sense, Clinton is an ex-president of The Beltway, although it was called the United States of America when he was president. My nation consists of Delaware, Virginia, and Maryland; it grew out of an economic collapse of the US in 2005. Thus, real-life figures do pop up from time to time; however, I am developing non-RL characters, albeit slowly...

Well, office space is office space, so shift my claim to the 69.75 floor...

He had chatted up a young female staffer from 'Love and Esterel,' and from there made his way to the portal. Obviously, he couldn't tell his wife that; she still remembered those peccadillos of the past. Nevertheless, he had found a means to get to the sixty-nine and three-fourths floor of the forty-story UN building. It was a bit odd, standing literally above the UN building, but he accepted it. Bill Clinton had lived through a lot; surely, he could accept living and working almost thirty stories above the UN building itself. Of course, a bit more office space would have been useful...
I'd like to take this opportunity to point out that the UN Building Management does not acknowledge the existance of any 69 3/4 floor, and as such you are on your own when it somes to things like maintence, janitorial services, etc.

Lucy Jones
Directory Maintence
UN Building Management

OOC: Bill Clinton... with an office close to the CPESL servicewomen's lounge.
H'mm.

OOC: Bill Clinton... with an office close to the CPESL servicewomen's lounge.
H'mm.

OOC: *dies laughing*

Well, where did you expect Clinton to end up?

To Lucy Jones, Director of Maintenance, UN Building Management -
We appreciate your note; as such, we are hiring our own maintenance and janitorial staff.
Signed,
The office of The Beltway's Ambassador to the United Nations

"Alright Ladies!, We have just received our orders!", Master Gunny Sgt Harkness, yelled to his Platoon.
"The Palentine Delgation has received their office on the Third Floor. Now lets find a representative of the Maintenance/Security department, to unload the goodies, and then go and kick some Mutie Butt! HOO-RAH!"

Master Gunny Sgt Harkness then said aloud,
"Who's gonna sign for this!"
The crates contained
4 .50 cal "Ma Deuce" MGs, A few crates of BARs, 2 cases of CZ-75 auto pistols, 2 cases Colt 1911A pistols, 3 flamethowers, 2 cases MP5-SD3s, 4 M-79 grenade launchers, 8 crates of gernades, plus the Ammo needed for the weapons.

"Master Gunny Sgt Harkness then said aloud,
"Who's gonna sign for this!"
"I can do that," said the receptionist, "and then I'll call someone from the Supplies & Logicistics department to deliver them to the Maintence of Order Department."

To:
Ken Scott
VP, Building Maintence
UN Building Management

Okay, we've got far enough with the mooring mast's structure that it's about the time for linking its systems up to the building's utilities. If you send the promised maintence worker up to show us how to do this we'll have somebody waiting by the lifthead to escort him or her onsite.

Captain Ingridssdaughter,
2iC the 5th Airborne Airbase Company,
Army of St Edmund.

"I can do that," said the receptionist, "and then I'll call someone from the Supplies & Logicistics department to deliver them to the Maintence of Order Department."

Gunny Harkness walked over to the receptionist, handed her the clipboard and said respectfully,
"Here you go Ma'am. Now where's the mutant infestation? My boys are looking forward to kick some butt, Hooah!."

(on the roof...)

The 'Screaming Beagles' have finished erecting the mooring-mast: Its quadrilateral column extends 120' upwards from the main building's roof, tapering from 30' wide at the base to 12' wide at the top, and is capped by a platform consisting of a central dome (12' in diameter, & another 12' tall) surrounded by an open-roofed 'viewing gallery' that adds a further 3' to the overall radius...
That dome houses the top of the lift-shaft & the lift's motors, a waiting-room, warning lights to alert aircraft to the spire's presence and searchlights for assisting night-time approaches, an automated weather-station (the information from which is, of course, copied directly to the IMO), radio aerials, and [CLASSIFIED], whilst the attached gallery -- which can be set free to rotate, so that any attached airships can change their orientation if the wind's direction changes -- has airship-mooring gear and a retractile gangway attached to it. Both the dome & the gallery are surfaced in shiny, silvery metal.
The main column is clad in plates of a weather-repelling material (which are actually translucent on a one-way basis, allowing some light in but not allowing people outside the tower to gain any visual clues about what's happening inside...) , in varying shades of blue, with a number of windows -- and a couple of dozen gargoyles, of varying sizes, which were apparently flown in last night -- scattered around its surface. Its only contents, above the entry-level, are the lift-shaft and a staircase that spirals around this.
The lowest level of the shaft, on the roof of the main building, houses a waiting-room and a security post, whilst another pair of domes (18' high, 18' in diameter, and also covered in a silvery metal) have been attached on the side of this that's opposite to the direction from which the prevailing wind comes -- and which therefore help to stabilise the mast -- house the radio room, auxiliary generators & other utilities, some rather basic accommodation for a small number of ground-crew, a store-room, and [CLASSIFIED].

To: Captain Ingridssdaughter,

Sorry for the delay in responding to you, my secretary is pathetic when it comes to delivering messages to my in a timely manner. A maintence worker will be arriving tomorrow sometime between 9:00 am and 5:00 pm UN Building Standard Time to assist your personnel with making the connections between your mooring mast and the UN Building.

Ken Scott
VP, Building Maintence Department
UN Building Management

(on the roof...)

The mooring-mast has been linked into the building's utility services, and the 'Screaming Beagles' have departed: The cloud that was hovering on the horizon, from which aircraft had appeared bringing in their personnel and equipment, has shrunken in upon itself and vanished. The entry into the base of the spire is now guarded by a team of St Edmundan marines, but the airship for which it was intended has not yet arrived...

2 months after having voted LAE withdraws from the UN, in order to protest against the negation of woman right for an abortion by #147
Abortion Legality Convention; the senate of Love and esterel voted yesterday, that it was time to join back the international community and the UN.
Love and esterel become a member of the UN for the second time, today.

We would like to ask the UN Building Mngmt service, if an office is available, maybe one of the 4 corner of the 69th 3/4 floor?

2 months after having voted LAE withdraws from the UN, in order to protest against the negation of woman right for an abortion by #147
Abortion Legality Convention; the senate of Love and esterel voted yesterday, that it was time to join back the international community and the UN.
Love and esterel become a member of the UN for the second time, today.

We would like to ask the UN Building Mngmt service, if an office is available, maybe one of the 4 corner of the 69th 3/4 floor?

Howdy LaE. Long time no see. :)

2 months after having voted LAE withdraws from the UN, in order to protest against the negation of woman right for an abortion by #147
Abortion Legality Convention; the senate of Love and esterel voted yesterday, that it was time to join back the international community and the UN.
Love and esterel become a member of the UN for the second time, today.

We would like to ask the UN Building Mngmt service, if an office is available, maybe one of the 4 corner of the 69th 3/4 floor?

Welcome back. :)

Welcome back, fellow U.N. crusader!

2 months after having voted LAE withdraws from the UN, in order to protest against the negation of woman right for an abortion by #147
Abortion Legality Convention... 3/4 floor?

Interesting, because the Abortion Legality Convention did no such thing.

OOC: Well it did permit it to be criminalised.

Actually, more accurate way to word it is it negated the ability for the UN to declare abortion a woman's right. I think language barrier, not understanding of the law is the bigger issue here.

Having read that there can be no food sold on the premises other than in The Stranger's Bar, Randomea bids to move out of the 27th floor corridoor/portal and into the 38th floor.
We would also ask that the Fou-Fou staff be reassigned as cleaning staff for their contempt of UN regulations and the sale of food without a license.

ooc: btw, Neville's gay according to Wiki. Unless he worships the Randomean representative in a pallative way, he is bisexual.

This also opens up floors 28, part of 31 and possibly Starbucks. McDonalds doesn't serve food so I guess it can remain.