Emancipation of Ducks
Attention UN delegates:
Please approve our recent proposals on behalf of our friends, the ducks. They are currently on page 23 of the proposals for UN resolutions and bear the titles Duck Suffrage and Emancipation of Ducks. As the proposals will quickly move from page 23, you may need to use the search function.
If you only compare the civility and intelligence of ducks to the barbarity and ignorance of geese, you will find it in your hearts to consider these basic duck rights. After reading and due consideration of these proposals, we believe you will readily recognize the validity and urgency of duck claims.
I will return frequently to answer any questions or comments in regard to these matters in this thread.
Why has this topic dropped like a stone? Is it because nobody is interested, or is it because I stated the ducks' case so clearly there is no question to ask?
Obviously you don't speak Duck. Please don't allow your ignorance to blind you to the plight of our sentient waterfowl friends.
Goobergunchia
26-11-2003, 22:09
We associate ourselves with the remarks of the representative from Simultania.
Collaboration
26-11-2003, 22:25
This proposal is a fine bll, a real feather in your cap. The opposition should be sent to the Quacks of Doom.
The Consumerist Oligarchy of F2B apologizes for any support we appeared to lend to this cause. As ultra-conservatives, we didn't actually know what the words "emancipation" and "suffrage" meant. In fact, these words do not appear in dictionaries or any publications that we allow in F2B.
The emancipation of ducks or any other living thing aside from elite human beings is clearly ridiculous. This is self-evident and requires no argument.
In a nation of almost two billion people, it is impractical to allow suffrage beyond the members of the ruling elite. Otherwise there would be so many disparate, incompatible opinions that no decisions would ever be possible.
The Real McCoy
28-11-2003, 09:16
I can honestly say that this series of proposals is among the top ten stupidest things I have ever heard.
Do you honestly expect this to gain enough support to enter quorum? Give ducks the right to vote?!?! What next? The fire ant? The quail? The grains of sand on a beach?
It's proposals like these that make UN Delegate's jobs more difficult. They have to sift through these and decide which are worthy to be discussed on an international level. YOU, sir/ma'am, are wasting their time and everyone elses with your delusional ideas and far-fetched expectations.
I believe ducks are more intelligent than the average man gives them credit for. However, before they are given the right to vote, I think they should be given a chance to prove their ability to use that right for the betterment of Duck- and Man-kind. If they were first given access to schooling and employment, then they could earn the right to vote like like the rest of us. One might think ducks are stupider than rocks, while others worship their omniscience at their webbed feet. If there could be a sort of "trial run" in the educational and work areas first, then, if they performed adequately enough, they could be given greater access to the political machine that is our governments.
COME ON! A voting duck this is SOOOOO stupid. You want to educate ducks RIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIGHT. This is the stupidest proposal on the list!
:lol: :lol: :lol: :lol: :lol:
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mliêstôlkakûmek(Love all as you love yourself)
Racism-the other stupid ideology
Peace, love, and girls with small waists and really big butts!
http://www.sulucas.com/images/steatopygia.jpg
They say, "Support the
Anti-Racism Act."
Try replacing the word "duck" with a term for any disenfranchised group in society or in history.
For example, click here (http://members.aol.com/aussieintn/ducks.html).
Outer Uiguria
28-11-2003, 23:38
The Knitting Women Club of Outer Uiguria is enraged to be compared to ducks. After all, ducks didn't participate in the great revolutionary struggle to overthrow the bloody dictator. And as the saying goes, "In revolution everything, outside nothing."
This is still a crazy proposal.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mliêstôlkakûmek(Love all as you love yourself)
Racism-the other stupid ideology
Peace, love, and girls with small waists and really big butts!
http://www.sulucas.com/images/steatopygia.jpg
It's still a dumb proposal.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mliêstôlkakûmek(Love all as you love yourself)
Racism-the other stupid ideology
Peace, love, and girls with small waists and really big butts!
http://www.sulucas.com/images/steatopygia.jpg
What is foolishness to others is wisdom to those with understanding.
The Real McCoy
29-11-2003, 08:51
What is foolishness to others is wisdom to those with understanding.
I have a lot of understanding on this issue, and I can honestly say that it lacks wisdom. You propose that we grant suffrage to a species that lacks [advanced] sentience. That by itself is an ignorant attempt at world harmony. But I'll bring it one step further. The duck has evolved for millennia and developed its own habits and instincts, but shows no sign of "culture" or "civilization." If ducks lack such culture, how do you expect humans to indoctrinate them to accept our culture and mannerisms with the hopes that ducks become productive members of society, hmm? Ducks have not evolved this way! They cannot understand our methods because they lack the necessary brain power! They have not reached the stage in development where this transition can possibly take place, and will not for tens of thousands of years!
YOU lack understanding, YOU lack wisdom, and YOU are foolish.
Dark Cow
29-11-2003, 08:56
I feel for you. Power to the ducks!
Hmm...a subhuman cretinous socialist such as Letila thinks it's stupid; therefore, it must be a good idea.
Whilst I support the general tenet of freedom for ducks or any other enslaved group, I can not help but feel a lack of relevance to a good deal of the United Nations.
To many a duck is a tasty dish with orange sauce or not getting any runs at cricket. With such a wide range of emotions thereby contained in the word duck, how can we hope to reach agreement. I admire your support for the ducks but they just arent Golden Eagles or Condors.
how do you expect humans to indoctrinate them to accept our culture and mannerismsThat's a disgraceful idea. We are not suggesting indoctrination of any group or species. They don't have to be exactly like us to have rights and deserve to be free.
The only argument the opposition has made is that this proposal is not funny. There has never been a requirement that UN proposals or resolutions be funny, and I doubt many UN delegates or members vote based on this criteria. Therefore I humbly request that UN delegates support the proposal of Duck Suffrage and at least one of the two proposals for Emancipation of Ducks.
One proposal seeks to achieve Emancipation of Ducks through improvements in duck living conditions. Although in some circumstances this might involve some unavoidable costs and/or slightly reduced opportunites for the expansion of certain industries, we believe that the long-term good will greatly outweigh any short-term challenges. Due to the living circumstances of most ducks, a broader benefit of this would be improvement in the quality of the environment.
Another proposal seeks to achieve Emancipation of Ducks by addressing the unseemly income inequality in our societies, as ducks are almost universally trapped at the lowest income levels. It would also increase basic welfare, addressing the large numbers of ducks and many others who sometimes "slip through the cracks".
The third proposal, Duck Suffrage seeks to protect the interests of ducks by providing them with a political voice. If adopted, this proposal would further democracy by extending opportunities for participation in the democratic process.
We commend all three of these proposals to you. We thank those who have already shown their support and request support from all UN delegates.
Let's show ducks we care!
:shock: Can you give us a real resolution? How can you emancipate an animal anyway? They wouldn't care...How would they contribute to the betterment of society? :roll:
The Real McCoy
30-11-2003, 03:47
how do you expect humans to indoctrinate them to accept our culture and mannerismsThat's a disgraceful idea. We are not suggesting indoctrination of any group or species. They don't have to be exactly like us to have rights and deserve to be free.
True, but for ducks to have suffrage under our system, they would need to have some exposure to our culture, wouldn't they? Or would you suggest a combination of electoral practices? "Drop your feces onto the name of the candidate of your choice." I intend the pun when I say that you are a quack.
Now then, there is no reason to continue this debate, since I can see that neither of your proposals remain on the master list.
You're lucky that I'm letting you off the hook for flaming, ithuania.
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Mliêstôlkakûmek(Love all as you love yourself)
Racism-the other stupid ideology
Peace, love, and girls with small waists and really big butts!
http://www.sulucas.com/images/steatopygia.jpg
The emancipation of ducks or any other living thing aside from elite human beings is clearly ridiculous. This is self-evident and requires no argument.
In a nation of almost two billion people, it is impractical to allow suffrage beyond the members of the ruling elite. Otherwise there would be so many disparate, incompatible opinions that no decisions would ever be possible.
The Consumerist Oligarchy of F2B wishes to make it clear to every nation in the world that we are in no way associated with the lunatic anarcho-communists of the Inclusive Collective of Not F2B. Our nation is F2B, their nation is Not F2B and not in any way F2Bian.
Heres an interesting question, are duck dicks orange?
Oppressed Possums
07-12-2003, 07:31
Emancipation by inebriation
BIG FAT HONKER
13-12-2003, 22:14
HONK!
We of Chumba ask. Are Ducks really our friends? We ask what have they done for us lately, apart from giving up there lives, for dinner, but what have they really done for the world?