NationStates Jolt Archive

I know it is commun sence, but not for all it seems.

I propose that farting in an elevator will be considerated as a "crime against humanity". After all, this is an unlawfull usage of a deadly gaz upon innocent civilians with no escape possible.

Possum Prop 44 Silent but Deadly

Passing gas in tight, closed spaces shall be deemed a crime against humanity. Violations will be punished by tar and feathers.

Passing gas near an open flame is a health risk to surrounding people and the environment. Violators of this will be sentenced to hard labor.

Passing gas in a closed space with an open flame shall be punished by death if the offender survives the actual act.

Lighting your farts is illegal. Exceptions and some other rules:
-No lighting in closed spaces
-No lighting in a public space (See exception)
-No lighting near a flamable object (again see exception)
-No lighting near people (see it again)
-No lighting at people
-Exception: May be lit at a party, or even at a circus, pertty much, you may light it for a crowd of 20+ people as long as there is no risk invilved.

In elevators: If it needs to come out, make sure your alone, and press all the buttons for every stop above or below you, depending on which way you are going. Open a hatch if necessary.

Lighting your farts is illegal. Exceptions and some other rules:
-No lighting in closed spaces
-No lighting in a public space (See exception)
-No lighting near a flamable object (again see exception)
-No lighting near people (see it again)
-No lighting at people
-Exception: May be lit at a party, or even at a circus, pertty much, you may light it for a crowd of 20+ people as long as there is no risk involved.

In elevators: If it needs to come out, make sure your alone, and press all the buttons for every stop above or below you, depending on which way you are going. Open a hatch if necessary.

Fart lighting rules:
-No lighting in closed spaces
-No lighting in a public space (See exception)
-No lighting near a flamable object (again see exception)
-No lighting near people (see it again)
-No lighting at people
-Exception: May be lit at a party, or even at a circus, pertty much, you may light it for a crowd of 20+ people as long as there is no risk involved.

In elevators: If it needs to come out, make sure your alone, and press all the buttons for every stop above or below you, depending on which way you are going. Open a hatch if necessary.

this is so ubsurd we won't say anything.

Although farting might make the planet warmer, I don't see anything else bad about it. =p

Cows produce something like 90% of all greenhouse gases.

This is all fine and well for the bystanders, but what about the person who has to fart? There should be some kind of a machine that you wear to reduce the smell or something

In other words, have the machine fart for you?

Isn't there a pill in Japan you can take that makes your farts smell sweet?
Maybe we could some to the water supply?

An exemption should be made for those who cannot control their ability to retain the fart from forces outside their reasonable limit of control.

Make them take the stairs.

"Oh the wind blows high and the wind blows free"
How about a fart tax, but that might reduce the sales of baked beans, OR you could put a fart tax on digestable commodities and beer etc etc that make you do it. :oops: :oops: :lol: 8)

Or, it could be an alternative fuel source...

If only you can harness the power of a fart.