NationStates Jolt Archive

Since we created the first the absolute zero bomb, many have considered the dangers of this device. Now, we will finally share them.

Obvious Dangers:
1. Absolute Zero = -459.67 Degrees F.
2. Range of this bomb = 200 miles
3. Absolute Zero freezes your molecules to the point of destruction.
4. Absolute Zero is JUST FREAKING COLD!!

Why we don't send them to other nations:
1.It is Invincible (not even a nuke or the most powerful weapons can kill it)
2. If we did, then the world would know how to make them.
3. May cause Global Absolute Zero Warfare or G.A.Z.W. which will lead to the Ultimate ice age and the end of life and the earth forever!! (AKA Ragnarok)

OOC: Awww bless, I remember my first world ending superweapon too.

Except replace world ending with world beating and superweapon with pastry.

Our pastries are awesome. Buy them.

are you still going? you know you're gonna fail right

Since we created the first the absolute zero bomb, many have considered the dangers of this device. Now, we will finally share them.

Rule of thumb: If your teenie-weenie nation has 'em, you can bet that the big boys have 'em too - and a hundred times more of 'em than you have.

-- Gen. Castro-Stalina, 365th Parachute Division (ret.)

Given your weapons and the fact we hve a large Communist country in our region alredy, would you care to join the Northern States Alliance?

"Any use of this weapon on our nation will result in a truly massive barrage from our IGNORE cannons. Both of the naval and land-based variety. I assure you, they have more than enough range and precise enough accuracy to render this supposed superweapon irrelevant before it hits, and will further neutralize any threat posed by your puny military to us. That is all.
-Erzsebet Sorvik, Foreign Minister."

Our nation has... Sarcasm. Perfectly suited to defeat Grues.

...

Or has it?

"Any use of this weapon on our nation will result in a truly massive barrage from our IGNORE cannons. Both of the naval and land-based variety. I assure you, they have more than enough range and precise enough accuracy to render this supposed superweapon irrelevant before it hits, and will further neutralize any threat posed by your puny military to us. That is all.
-Erzsebet Sorvik, Foreign Minister."
Just so you know, we BARELY, almost NEVER use them, ya there that dangerous

Any use of the Absolute Zero Bomb within the vicinity of the Imperial sphere of interest shall result in immediate and totally disproportionate retalliation by the National Defence Forces through the use of the Absolute Hotness Bomb. Please find attached the general characteristics of the Absolute Hotness Bomb.

[attached a picture of an absolute hotness female in absolute sexy lingerie]

Any use of the Absolute Zero Bomb within the vicinity of the Imperial sphere of interest shall result in immediate and totally disproportionate retalliation by the National Defence Forces through the use of the Absolute Hotness Bomb. Please find attached the general characteristics of the Absolute Hotness Bomb.

[attached a picture of an absolute hotness female in absolute sexy lingerie]Human sexuality is disgusting.

~ [Indecipherable series of chirps & a mild aroma of pineapple]

Vojvodina-Nihon has an even more powerful weapon: one which can explode the particles of sunlight, eventually causing a chain reaction that will destroy the entire universe!

Also, I initially read this as an "Absolut" Zero bomb. :<

That's your fault for being an alcoholic. Damn you and your dissipation in our streets, vomiting and mooning your way to the gutter on a tide of Absolut Zero Bombs.

...yes, well, quite.

"Hmm, interesting." said Professor Whitmarsh, physicist at Ousevale University, looking at the article on his lap describing the AZB. "I'd have thought this was a scientific impossibility, but these Soivet boys appear to have cracked it."

"Hmm?" Professor Dennis, enjoying his lunch at his desk on the other side of the room, looked up.

"This absolute zero bomb, Ron. They say they have an explosive device capable of reducing the temperature of a given area to zero Kelvin."

"Our A-Z project says reaching the mark is theoretically possible, but an explosion? Exothermic reations will negate the effects of whatever chemical or physical substance they're using. Probably be rather nippy there for a while though."

"True, true, but imagine the ice-cream you could make with a non-explosive core."

Professor Dennis chuckled. "You've never tried liquid nitrogen frozen sorbet, have you, Martin? Awful stuff, truly disgusting."

Just so you know, we BARELY, almost NEVER use them, ya there that dangerous

OOC: You have a month on NS under your belt, and 44 posts. Do you really think that older nations couldn't simply obliterate yours if they chose?

I suppose the joke is lost on you.

That's your fault for being an alcoholic. Damn you and your dissipation in our streets, vomiting and mooning your way to the gutter on a tide of Absolut Zero Bombs.

...yes, well, quite.

Vojvodina-Nihon is not an alcoholic! Vojvodina-Nihon was only rather tired, because it was up all night drinking. We're much better now. Except for the midget pounding on the inside of our forehead with a mallet.

Vojvodina-Nihon is not an alcoholic! Vojvodina-Nihon was only rather tired, because it was up all night drinking. We're much better now. Except for the midget pounding on the inside of our forehead with a mallet.Just as planned.

~ [Indecipherable series of chirps & a mild aroma of pineapple]

No. Just no.

Thermodynamics says "no."

Plot says "no" the instant the word "invulnerable" comes into play.

And this thread isn't going to go anywhere but "I CAN HAS COLD BOMS" and "HUR NO YOU CANTS" so the forum says "no."