NationStates Jolt Archive

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SFA-Logo.gif
The Sixth Di Bradini Cup
An Under-21 International Tournament

This is the sixth international Under-21 football tournament to held by the SFA, Starblaydia is proud to be the venue for the fourth installment what is now widely regarded as the current incarnation of the Under-21 World Cup. sixteen teams have come to Starblaydia, and one will emerge as the champions, to lift the sixth Di Bradini Cup!

With this tournament, Starblaydia will christen the new Stadii Di Bradini. The brand-new 196,754-seater stadium is to be the new permanent home of the Di Bradini Cup and the first match will be the Final of this tournament. It is a shining pantheon of glass and steel and light, ergonomically and environmentally designed to be the ultimate 'green' stadium, with ground source heat pumps, rain-water storage systems, solar power panels over everything that can absorb the sun. The technical details of the environment don't detract from the entertainment spectacle, however, with enormous big-screens and a cutting-edge sound system and fantastic views from every seat.

The first matches will take place on the evening (GMT) of Thursday the 17th of July. Starblaydia, as hosts, are automatically be placed in Group A, with the remaining draw coming out of seeded pots at random.

Entered Teams (in Rank order)
Newmanistan (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836272&postcount=3))
Daehanjeiguk (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13839002&postcount=9))
Candelaria And Marquez (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13842661&postcount=13))
Elves Security Forces (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13837952&postcount=7))
Jeruselem (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13839152&postcount=10))
Starblaydia (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13837958&postcount=8))
Krytenia
Taeshan (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836362&postcount=5))
Cafundéu (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836337&postcount=4))
Blouman Empire
Yafor 2
Sorthern Northland (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836198&postcount=2))
Lovisa
Ameriganastan
Kansiov
Land de Wood (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836439&postcount=6))

Group Draw
Group A
Taeshan (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836362&postcount=5))
Starblaydia (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13837958&postcount=8))
Cafundéu (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836337&postcount=4))
Kansiov (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13845877&postcount=23))

Group B
Blouman Empire
Elves Security Forces (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13837952&postcount=7))
Ameriganastan
Candelaria And Marquez (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13842661&postcount=13))

Group C
Newmanistan (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836272&postcount=3))
Yafor 2 (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13845540&postcount=22))
Krytenia
Land de Wood (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836439&postcount=6))

Group D
Lovisa (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13846650&postcount=25))
Daehanjeiguk (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13839002&postcount=9))
Sorthern Northland (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13836198&postcount=2))
Jeruselem (Roster (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13839152&postcount=10))

Group Schedule
(Please note that Groups have been randomised, and are no longer in rank order).
MD1: 1v2, 3v4
MD2: 4v2, 1v3
MD3: 2v3, 4v1

QF1: A1 v B2
QF2: B1 v A2
QF3: C1 v D2
QF4: D1 v C2

SF1: QF1 v QF2
SF2: QF3 v QF4

e.g. on Matchday One in Group A, the matches will be Taeshan Vs Starblaydia and Cafundéu Vs Kansiov.


More information will appear here when... it appears.

Sorthern Northland Under 21 National Football Team
http://img206.imageshack.us/img206/5357/snfald4.png


Goalkeepers:

1. Benjamin Gaudet, 21 y/o
13: Nicolas Bunch 19 y/o
23: Charley McNamara, 16 y/o

Defenders:
2: Bernard Labbé, 19 y/o Right back
12: Trevor Blunt, 17 y/o Right-back
3: Freddy Lovell - 20 y/o Left-back
22: Aaron Mason - 17 y/o Left-back
5: Pafnutij Ipatovič Lenin, 20 y/o Centre-back
6: Roman Ivanovič - 20 y/o Centre-back
15: Louis Auvray - 18 y/o Centre-back
16: Paddy Byrne - 17 y/o Centre-back

Midfielders:
7: Alexandre Bernard - 20 y/o Right Winger
21: Joseph Labbé - 17 y/o Right-winger
11: Tsujimura Motoyuki - 21 y/o Left-winger
17: Colin Phillips - 17 y/o Left-winger
4: Brian Tompkins - 20 y/o Central-midfielder
8: Caleb Edwards - 21 y/o Central-Midfielder
14: Xing Lee - 21 y/o Central-midfielder
18: Kyle Jones - 18 y/o Central-midfielder

Forwards:

9: Giṓrgos Karyōtákīs, 19 y/o
10: Ham Hyi-san - 18 y/o
19: Thilo Zoß - 19 y/o
20: Txikel Inaxize -18 y/o

Kits

Home/Away

http://img384.imageshack.us/img384/1452/snhomena7.png (http://imageshack.us)http://img266.imageshack.us/img266/6740/snawaywc41qe3.png (http://imageshack.us)

Manager: Bryn Evans

Formation is 4-4-2 with a style modifier of +2.
Numbers 1 to 11 are the usual starters.
Feel free to make a couple of changes to those line ups though.

RP thingy

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod scoring events N
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out red cards to my players Y
Godmod other events Y

It’s time for the next generation of Rockets to take flight. The 4th Di Bradini Cup championship winning players have all moved on. As the 5th team was largely also 20 and 21 year olds, many of those players have followed them. Many of these names you haven’t heard of. Yet. They’re ready to follow in the footsteps of McAllister, Brooker, Drummond, and Hennis and keep Newmanistan as one of the top teams in U-21 football.

Newmanistan generally plays a 4-3-3formation.

If my opponent RP’s first they may:

Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes, but just to the extent of saying so and so was injured. I’ll determine the severity.
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes, but no more then 1 per game.
Godmod other events: TG your idea for approval first. No deaths/stadium damage.

**** COACHING STAFF ****

Manager: Brian Carson
Age: 49
Club Team: Pocono City Capitals
Background: Carson is the only returnee (well, Merrill is too) from those who hoisted the Trophy at the end of the 4th Di Bradini Cup, and he returns to be the head coach for his third go-around with the junior team. His performance at this level has been truly outstanding. He has an outstanding ability to catch on to opponent’s tendencies and making appropriate adjustments, earning him a reputation as a tactical master. He is a player’s manager who does not show anger in front of his team as he feels that demoralizes them. Carson also has a great track record with the Capitals in the NPL.

Assistant: Chris Merrill
Age: 42
Club Team: Dover City Mountaineers
Background: Merrill has been the assistant coach in the previous two Di Bradini Cups, and even though they coach rival NPL teams, they have a good rapport with one another at this level.

Assistant: Kevin Dalton
Age: 40
Club Team: Pittstown Miners
Background: Kevin Dalton has been one of the greatest goalkeepers in NPL history, and played for the Rockets in World Cup 40 and World Cup 41, plus their Cups of Harmony, and the 27th Baptism of Fire. After Cup of Harmony 33, Dalton stepped down as a player and announced he was going in to coaching, and promptly signed with Pittstown, a newly promoted premier league team. He will work exclusively with the keepers.

**** THE STARTING LINEUP****

GOALKEEPER

Name: Matt Sullivan
Pos: GK
Age: 18
Jersey #: 1
Club Team: Hastings Crusaders
Bio: An intelligent keeper, who reads plays very well, and also seems to have great ability in working with his defenders to make sure that they all are on the same page. This is big reason why Sullivan is starting over Allwine. Coach Carson is confident with him in goal even though Sullivan really hasn’t been in any real pressure situations yet in his career, playing for a lower level NPL club. Some say it’s an audition for the Loudon Leopards, who are rumored to be about to offer a huge transfer deal, but are wanting to see how he does here first.

DEFENDERS

Name: Sheldon Talcott (*** TEAM CAPTAIN ***)
Pos: LB
Age: 20
Jersey #: 5
Club Team: Loudon Leopards
Bio: Sheldon is the only defender that returns from the 5th Di Bradini Cup team. He was a substitute there. Talcott does not have an over-imposing physical stature, but at the same time, it’s decent enough to where you can’t push him around. He has outstanding defensive awareness, and knows that there’s some pressure in this particular spot in the backfield, as it was formerly held by the great Jeremy Brooker. Talcott can handle the pressure (or else he wouldn’t have taken Brooker’s number, too), he has great composure, which is why he was handed the captaincy.

Name: Scott LaFave
Pos: LCB
Age: 16
Jersey #: 3
Club Team: Daytopia Racers
Bio: Scott is a tall, aggressive defender who is wise beyond his years, mainly because he plays for such a horrible team in Daytopia. His Racers always seem to be defending, so while frustrating, it has made him a better player quicker. He takes no crap from the other team, and isn’t afraid to take a chance with a hard tackle. Usually, he is smart about it, but it will probably see him get booked every now and then. Daytopia fans greeted his announcement to the Di Bradini team with mixed emotions. They are happy for him, but see him being a major target of overseas scouts, as he’s reportedly made comments about having interest in playing abroad.

Name: Brett Taratino
Pos: RCB
Age: 16
Jersey #: 7
Club Team: South Tier Seagulls
Bio: Brett was a teammate of LaFave’s as they were growing up, and they are very excited about playing together again. He was the target of an eventually successful large transfer offer that will see him move to the South Tier Seagulls this coming season. Due to South Tier just paying a big price for him, don’t expect him to be the same kind of target that LaFave may be from overseas scouts. Brett is a similar player, tall, and aggressive. This combination may have some less tough strikers get a little antsy about taking the ball up the center of the pitch. He’ll probably get booked a little more often then LaFave.

Name: Alex Lampert
Pos: RB
Age: 17
Jersey #: 4
Club Team: Centralia Cougars
Bio: Lampert was purchased from the Cougars unofficial “minor league” team, Centralia Town, who won the D League this past season. He is just another of those great defenders that Centralia seems to have an endless supply of. Alex is a very studious person, taking up after his father, who is brain surgeon. Lampert may have gone in that direction too if not for his football ability. He is the quickest of the starting defenders, with average height, and average physicality.

MIDFIELDERS

Name: James Seidler
Pos: LM
Age: 17
Jersey #: 12
Club Team: Springfield Thoroughbreds
Bio: Seidler is the Brett Prescott of this team. He is just as nasty, rough, and aggressive with the opponent, often assigned to the other team’s top scorer to rough him up and get in his head, so that he is looking behind him when he should be focusing. But like Prescott, Seidler is smart about it. He knows when to do it, and when to lay off; thus not getting as many bookings as you might think someone like this would. He can also play the game, he’s got a great finishing touch, and sets up the strikers with outstanding crosses with great frequency.

Name: Dirk Brogan
Pos: CM
Age: 17
Jersey #: 11
Club Team: Stroudsbourg Panthers
Bio: Brogan is an all-around talent, who can really serve multiple roles for the team based on the way coach Carson wants to go about doing things. He is the kind of player who may not be incredible at one thing, but he does everything very well, and very consistently. He has great vision, and actually is a little reminiscent of Matt Caufield, who started at this spot in the last two Di Bradini Cups.

Name: Kyle Carrigan
Pos: RM
Age: 19
Jersey #: 9
Club Team: Olympia Gladiators
Bio: Kyle is the little brother of Kevin Carrigan, who has had now has a ton of experience at the senior level. Like his brother, Kyle is especially good on set pieces, and in particular with the delivery of corner kicks. He has average speed, and is also average in terms of physicality but he plays with a lot of heart. Kyle was a reserve on the 5th Di Bradini Cup roster, but never saw game action.

STRIKERS
Name: Brett Carlson
Pos: LS
Age: 16
Jersey #: 10
Club Team: Pocono City Capitals
Bio: Is this the next Jeremy McAllister? Could he even be better? He signed with Pocono City and Brian Carson at the age of 14, and then in the most reason NPL season made an immediate impact despite his young age. He’s only going to get better, and now on a team with other young players, playing for his coach at the club level, look for Carlson to be the new person carrying the flag for the Empire as the leading Di Bradini Cup scorer. He should be able to work very well with the Vilardi sisters.

Name: Shannon Vilardi
Pos: ST
Age: 20
Jersey #: 14
Club Team: Hastings Crusaders
Bio: Shannon was a reserve in the last Di Bradini Cup, but did see action and did score one goal in that competition. Now, she looks to be one of the teams leading scorers, and beside her twin sister, this will be a dream come true, because they really have not had much of an opportunity to ever play together as teammates.

Name: Jennifer Vilardi
Pos: RS
Age: 20
Jersey #: 15
Club Team: Fairfield City Admirals
Bio: Jennifer is one of the few people returning from the 5th Di Bradini Cup team, and is the lone starter to be doing so. Her and twin sister Shannon will be an exciting duo to watch in Starblaydia as they both have great speed and a terrific finishing touch. Neither will shy away from contact. Jennifer, who has a thing for Jeremy McAllister, is especially motivated to carry on his legacy here.

**** SUBSTITUTES ****

Name: Kurt Allwine
Pos: GK
Age: 21
Jersey #: 21
Club Team: Tundra Falls Mariners
Bio: Kurt made a quick impression as a 17 year old to be named as a substitute on the 5th Di Bradini Cup team, and he was seen as the inevitable starting goalie to replace Hennis for this tournament if he continued to progress. Well, he hasn’t quite come along at the same pace. He’s still a great keeper and deserving to be the substitute, but it wasn’t his time to start.

Name: Eric Blunden
Pos: CB
Age: 20
Jersey #: 6
Club Team: West Penthoria Rivermen
Bio: Blunden was initially groomed by the amazing Centralia Cougar defensive system before he was loaned out and eventually purchased by West Penthoria, a club that was promoted before the start of last season and wanted to stay at the Premier League level. They did that. Blunden is a physical player, though he can sometimes be beat by great speed. He’ll be a good option off the bench.

Name: Michelle Norton
Pos: CB
Age: 18
Jersey #: 8
Club Team: Fairfield City Admirals
Bio: The one Brian Carson let get away from him in Pocono City. He originally wasn’t sold on Michelle, so when Fairfield City presented a transfer offer, he let her go. It’s proved to be a rare mistake of his as Michelle is truly blossoming into a fine defender. She is knowledgeable, and has great awareness. Physicality isn’t her claim to fame, but she’s not afraid of it.

Name: Justin Lyons
Pos: MID
Age: 18
Jersey #: 13
Club Team: North Charlotte Wildcats
Bio: An agile midfielder, when the Rockets need to add in some offense at the position, Lyons will see his name get called. He’s not bad on set pieces either, and has a good finishing leg kick. He has decent speed, but a lack of toughness is what will probably keep him from being a truly top class midfielder. Some say he should play up front.

Name: Calvin Lane
Pos: ST
Age: 16
Jersey #: 17
Club Team: Putnam Lake Eagles
Bio: Lane would be capable of starting, but he will be used as a substitute in likely every game. His blazing speed, which works so well with Jeremy McAllister at the club level, makes him a superb option to be coming in fresh late in games when the opponent’s legs are getting a little weary. Inconsistency is what separates him and Brett Carlson. Not that Lane is badly streaky, just that Carlson is a little more reliable. And yeah, and it helps Brett that he plays for the coach at the club level, too.

***** RESERVES *****

Name: Todd Benjamin
Pos: CB
Age: 15
Jersey #: 2
Club Team: Southport Tigers
Bio: Southport may be getting a little like Centralia now with their defensive focus, and Benjamin is proof of that. He is a tall defender, but doesn’t yet use his height to the advantage in the way that he seems most capable. Probably, in time with some bulking up, he will, and then become more physical. He has a lot of potential, and plays in a good system at the club level for developing defenders.

Name: Tom Cuyler
Pos: MID
Age: 19
Jersey #: 16
Club Team: South Tier Seagulls
Bio: A two-way midfielder who also plays with a bit of mean streak. If Seidler should ever be forced to miss a game due to red cards or injury, Cuyler will take his place and be able to do the role just the same. Don’t be surprised if Carson makes him a sub and Lyons a reserve in a game that may be against an offensive minded club.

Name: Chris Farrell
Pos: ST
Age: 15
Jersey #: 18
Club Team: Hampton Rangers
Bio: The Bulldogs have two of the better young attacker prospects in the Empire with Farrell, as well as Taylor. So far they have done a good job developing and at this rate who knows, they could seriously move up the NPL ladder, or see their kids purchased by the big clubs, whether here or overseas. Chris is very agile and can dribble around defenders easily, but when they get physical with him, he is still vulnerable. With a little bulking up, Chris will become more of a complete player. He has the work ethic and has been spending countless hours in the gym to do exactly that.

Name: Kevin Taylor
Pos: ST
Age: 16
Jersey #: 53 (superstition)
Club Team: Hampton Rangers
Bio: Taylor is a nice compliment to Farrell because while they are both teammates at the club level and talented young players, they are also much different in style. While Farrell is the agile one, Taylor likes to take the defenders head on, and is much harder to power off the ball. With these two helping each other out, look for them both to become complete players. Whether with Hampton, or elsewhere.

CCFM RELEASES ANOTHER LIST OF UNKNOWN PLAYERS
TO PLAY ANOTHER U-21 COMPETITION

The U-21 team of Cafundéu alternates good and bad campaigns. Last time, an intermediate level between good and bad, commanded by the coach Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga. This time, in order to try to make a good campaign, the team will have the experienced and efficient coach David Nefasto.

Style: Very Offensive

Here is the list of 23 players (number-name [age, team, rating]):

Use the BOLDED names

Goalkeepers:

1- Bruno Meniz "PERU" (21, Clube Comercial, B)
12- Nikos MENAKILIS (18, Metropolitano, C)
22- JÚLIO César Lambreta (20, Petardos S/A, B)

Full-Backs:

2- ROGÉRIO Flores do Campo (20, Galáxia, A)
6- IGOR Teixeira Robles (19, Central United, B)
14- Luciano Alvarenga DATENA (19, Vila Velha, C)
16- Erik Paviani Moura "PEIXEIRA" (17, Carandirú, C)

Defenders:

3- Michel Cunha Miyasaki Abidiniz "JAPA" (20, Faculdade de Medicina, A)
4- Gilberto Donizetti NUNES (20, Atlético Jutense, B)
13- WILLIAM Silva Jerônimo (16, Albrecht FC [C&M], C)
21- José Luiz Giulanno "ZÉ LUIZ" (19, Porto Lacruz, B)

Defensive Midfielders:

5- Fábio Germano Santos "FABINHO" (21, Central United, A)
15- Charles JULES (21, Dunboor FC, A)
17- Pedro Moreno Cardoso "PEDRINHO" (18, Clube Imperial, B)
20- MIGUEL de Serodi (20, University Students [EIT], C)

Offensive Midfielders:

8- Kauã Cardozo SERRANO (18, Galáxia, A)
11- Anti ILMARI (17, Cafundó do Juta, A)
19- Fernando MARQUES (19, SC Lasft, B)
23- JACKSON Mendonça Sobrinho (20, América, C)

Attackers:

7- Dênis Conte ALVES (20, Dunboor FC, A)
9- André Lopes MATOSO (18, Petardos S/A, B)
10- Fernando Maiorini Schomad "NANDO" (20, Central United, B)
18- SÉRGIO Daniel Mauá "GUARÁ" (21, Sambarilove, C)

Coach: David Nefasto

Formation (offensive 4-3-3):

------------------------------Peru------------------------------
-----Rogério-----------Japa------------Nunes-----------Igor-----
-----------------------------Fabinho----------------------------
----------Ilmari (or Jules)------------Serrano (or Pedrinho)--------
-----------------------------Matoso----------------------------
----------------------Nando----------Alves---------------------

Matoso is part of the attack, team can become a bit more defensive or offensive depending on the midfielders used

Kits (home-away-third):

http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/CafHome4.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/CafAway4.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/CafThird4.jpg

(to be completed with a small detail)

Jerseys will be posted later when star makes them

GK Isaac Newton #43 19
LD Chuck the Duck #7 19
CD Alan Pearsin #77 19
RD Rickys Meyerse #11 19
RM Axe Lewis #8 19
RCM Jake Del Rio #33 19
LCM Zack the Geek #17 19
LM Myan Inca #4 19
LS Alan Gregory #42 19
CS Jamie Spensor #23 16
RS Ricky Zellefrow #14 19
SUBS
GK Argentin Royal #2 19
D Zeke Rogers #3 19
M Steve Komen #4 19
S Theo Aztec #5 19

Manager-Lyran Strategos

Andrew Wood has announced that he will manage the U-21 side as well as the national side. However, he has also brought in Alexis Bakker as his assistant manager.
A 25 man squad has been announced. While this may seem excessive some of the best players are involved in the Oxen Cup and a final decision will be made on these players once that competition has completed and any injuries have been examined as well as the general condition of the players.
In addition to this there is some club football to be played between now and the start of the tournament, which again may affect the fitness of players in the squad.
So the Land de Wood squad for the forthcoming Di Bradini cup is as follows:

Steve Pilot plays GK for New Dorset Stars and is 21 years old
A young goalkeeper who is already being touted as the next number 1 in a few years time.

Gerard Aguirre plays GK for Northern Lights and is 21 years old
Good goalkeeper needs to improve his positioning sense a bit but is one of the best shot stoppers around.

Chad Deblois plays GK for Wood Town and is 19 years old
Great at positioning himself for crosses but not so good at shot stopping.

Daniel Delorit plays RB for Wood Limited and is 19 years old
Fast right back good at getting forward needs to remember to get back and defend though.

Roger Roberts plays RB or LB for Woodhampton Rovers and is 18 years old
Teenage fullback with a bright future, not quite ready for the full international scene.

Ray Hamil * plays RB for Broxton United and is 21 years old
Young right back ready, likes to get down that right flank and overlap the winger.

Richard Wilson * plays CB for Wood Town and is 21 years old
Young centre back with a promising future.

Curro Arnott plays CB for Woodham and is 21 years old
Good reliable centre back, slight concerns over whether at 5ft 8 he is tall enough to be an international centre back.

Leyti Goldberg plays CB for Coalfires United and is 19 years old
Teenage centre back showing a huge amount of promise.

Joshua Ashton plays LB for Coalfires United and is 21 years old
An attacking full back with a huge amount of promise.

Kevin Wallace * plays RW or LW for New Dorset Stars and is 21 years old
A winger with tons of pace, certainly one for the future but may be a useful substitute to terrorise tired defenders.

Tom Darkless plays RW or AM for Southern Village and is 21 years old
Right sided player, good down the winger and behind the front man, possibly not quite ready for the full international team yet.

Jamie Dow plays RW for Wood Town and is 21 years old
A fast winger and a fine crosser of the ball.

Gilles Howden plays RW for Southern Village and is 21 years old
Lacks a little bit of pace but is a highly technically gifted crosser of the ball.

Charlot Avakian plays CM for Woodhampton Rovers and is 21 years old
Good ball winner but not so great when going forward.

Garnet Aigner plays CM for Coalfires United and is 19 years old
Equally good defending or attacking

Jamie Beveridge plays CM for Wood Town and is 20 years old
Young midfielder with a huge amount of promise.

Landen Boyd plays CM for Woodhampton United and is 20 years old
Likes to get forward, and set up attacks but needs to remember to defend

Woodrow Wilson plays LW for Woodhampton Rovers and is 18 years old
Teenage sensation. This young man only just missed out on a place in the Oxen Cup squad.

Derek Brand plays LW for Woodhampton United and is 20 years old
One of the best if not the best crosser of the ball Land de Wood has to offer, but will struggle to find a place in the team against Woodrow Wilson

John Little plays CS for New Dorset Stars and is 18 years old
Teenage striker, likely to have a good career in the top league and only just missed out on a place in the Oxen Cup squad

Richard Higgins * plays CS for Wood Limited and is 21 years old
Young pacey striker, only likely to be a supersub in the Oxen Cup, but could well be the hero at u-21 level.

David Bomber plays TM for Coalfires United and is 21 years old
Young target man, standing at 6 foot 6, he'll out jump most defenders, just needs to improve his accuracy.

Dasras Endo plays CS for Wood Limited and is 20 years old
Good striker of the ball, not too good in the air, but on the ground has plenty of pace.

Darroll Blyth plays TM for East Lampton and is 20 years old
Standing at 6ft5 this target man is literally heads and shoulders above some of his team mates. Just lacks a little bit of maturity at times.

Players with a * after their name are involved in the Oxen Cup and may be pulled out at the last minute, but no replacement will be sent.

There is a concern about the lack of young centre backs in Land de Wood, only 3 play for the clubs, and a national scouting program is to be set up to find some more promising centre backs.

Our kit and first 11 will be revealed in due course.
---------------------------------------------------
Next game's first 11 posted here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13861001&postcount=44)

From the offices of the VSC does the Marauders information come.

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events Y
RP injuries to my players Y (be reasonable)
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players N
Godmod Other Events Y

Kits

http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/ValHome4.jpghttp://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/ValAway4.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/ValThird4-1.jpg

Home Alternate

For those players listed without Academies, please assume that they are free and open to transfers.

Manager
Orophin Anárion
Age: 24,565
Anárion is proof that if you keep at it and provide decent results, that you will eventually be rewarded. Taking over for the tacticless Roki Sardan, Anárion is hoping that his time studying under Fabio Mannasuch will be enough to get the Marauders back to the championship.

Assistant
Alejand Cartain
Age: 12,458
A relatively young assistant who has spent time on the staff of Raynor City, Rinaldi, and FC Capri during each of their title runs. He's unusual for the managers of Valanora as he favors a more defensive approach to the game, where Anárion is like the majority and favors attacking flair.

Keeper
17 Fëanáro Ciryatan, Hartdale Academy
Age: 21
Sex: M
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 157 lbs
A very quiet young man who justs wants to play football. Remarkably fit for an elf of his size and deceptively quick, he might one day be the answer to the Valanora NT's problem at the keeper position.

Defenders
39 Stephias Deadleaf, Wexax Academy
Age - 21
Sex - M
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 167 lbs
After a good showing in the last edition, Deadleaf has been given the captaincy and will be the anchor for the squad. His calm and never say die attitude is something that the everyone will be able to look up to.

42 Daeron Srion, A.F.F (Cafundeu)
Age - 20
Sex - M
Height: 5'9"
Weight: 149 lbs
Faster than deadleaf and better technique than Séregon, Srion is possibly the most talented member of the back three. Still, his lack of size can be a problem on set pieces and against strikers with a good ariel game.

37 Fingolfin Séregon, Baysleef Academy
Age - 19
Sex - M
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 168 lbs
The slowest of the three defenders, but the best marker and with the best positioning. Fingolfin will do his job well in the back end, but not venture forward for the attack at the risk of being exposed on the counter.

Midfield
27 Ceine Jurangil, Ranca Toco (Cafundeu) ~
Age - 21
Sex - M
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 170 lbs
One of two starters in the midfield to return for the sixth edition, Jurangil was one of the bright spots last tournament. He's spent time with Laborious Hawk in Cafundeu and that has resulted in some improvements in his offensive abilities, but his job is still to keep the opposing side from coming through the middle.

7 Tathar Súrion, Ranca Toco (Cafundeu)
Age - 21
Sex - M
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 188 lbs
One of three naturalized players that the squad decided to call up, along with the Starbladyi Kimone Savage and Cafundeu-born Ricardinho. Also the partner with Jurangil last tournament, the two of them should be able to shut down any side wishing to play directly through the middle.

26 Taikinu Ories, Protectorate United (Ad'ihan)
Age - 21
Sex - M
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 161 lbs
Ories has grown up watching Jannian and now va Drake exploit countless oppenents on the wings with their smooth silky play. He's modeled his game after the two crafty wingers and has something of an aura about him that says he is destined for success. If that is to come true, his great service needs to make a mark here first.

33 Nicole Delara, Cathedral City (Candelaria And Marquez)
Age - 20
Sex - F
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 135 lbs
Second-cousin to Roger Zetaback of Soldarian FC, he has shaped her into a devious and explosive little talent at the attacking midfielder position. Still very much a raw talent, however she has the grace of a gazelle out there on the pitch, and the vision of a hawk to pick apart defences for days.

12 Tinúviel Hardanal, Valanari Academy ~
Age - 18
Sex - F
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 152 lbs
Unlike Ories, Hardanal is not built to be a sensational offensive threat out wide, but more of a possessive winger. She is probably the weakest link the starting eleven as she is not the fastest nor the best marker, but has tons of heart.

Strikers
16 Finwë Celebrindal, Clube Imperial (Cafundeu)
Age - 19
Sex - M
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 192 lbs
Celebrindal was obviously built to be a linking striker with his size and control of the ball. Combined with the speedy little Anwamanë, I expect some miraculous goals between the two, as they seem to compliment each other very well.

9 Lúthien Anwamanë, Green Island (Candelaria And Marquez) ~
Age - 18
Sex - F
Height: 5'8"
Weight: 134 lbs
Blazing fast, and just when you think she has hit top speed, she puts on the turbo and notches it up another level. Yet for her remarkable speed, she still lacks confidence in front of goal.

Reserves
GK: 1 Finduilas Nénharma, age 18, Rinaldi Academy (F)
CB: 20 Alatáriël Anamanë, age 20, Valanari Academy (F) ~
CB: 6 Amroth Súrin, age 19, Night Academy (M)
CB: 24 Krimone Savage, age 20, Hondo Owls (M)
LM: 5 Elerossë Falassion, age 19, Baysleef Academy (M) ~
RM: 29 Ricardinho Ricardo Mário Gomez, age 17 , Petardos S/A (Cafundeu) (M)
MC: 14 Lúthien Inwëlin, age 19, Night Academy (F)
MC: 15 Valandil Ancalímon, age 18, Valanari Academy (M)
AMC: 8 Leë Oronrá, age 20, Mar Sara Flames (M) ~
ST: 28 Oropher of Nargothrond, age 19, Mar Sara Flames (M) ~
ST: 10 Elwing Palantír, age 18, Rinaldi Academy (F)

Ciryatan
Srion Deadleaf Séregon
Hardanal Jurangil Súrion Ories
Delara
Celebrindal Anwamanë

Captain: Stephias Deadleaf
Left Corner: Tinúviel Hardanal
Right Corner: Tinúviel Hardanal
Set Pieces: Nicole Delara
Penalty Taker: Finwë Celebrindal

~ Denotes Vyintanese

I Give My Opponent Permission
(and actively encourage them) To:
====================
Choose My Scorers
GodMod Any Goalscoring Events
Yellow Card Players
GodMod Other Events for Humorous Intent
====================

Notes:
1) The best starting eleven are numbered 1-11 and are in bold

2) I actively encourage, nay nearly demand, that if you RP first you pick my scorers (if any).

3) * Denotes female player, ^ Denotes Dwarf player.

4) Starblaydia will perform the Raiigar (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Raiigar.html) war dance before each match they play.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SFA-Logo.gif
Starblaydia's 6th Di Bradini Cup Roster
We've Got World and Regional Champions!

The Staff
AI. Apollina Iakovakis (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Apollina_Iakovakis.html)*, Manager, 51 - Indigenous World Cup Winner
23 Caps, 4 Goals (Uncapped at Under-21 Level)
A competitive attacking midfielder in her playing days, Apollina won the Indigenous World Cup in her playing days before going into coaching. She currently manages Starblaydia's Under-21s, who she has led to third place finishes at both the inaugural Di Bradini Cup and International Justantina Cup.

The Goalkeepers
1. Jamar Wilson, GK, 21 - Paricone Athletic FC
12. Javier Bianchi, GK, 20 - Hippion Heartland
19. Luigi Emilo Lobos, GK, 15 - Internashionale

The Defenders
2. Peter Movalinen, RB, 21 - Nemya Hotspurs - AOCAF 23 Winner
3. Jeff Gavelli, LB, 19 - Port Cythera
5. Nei Samba, L/CB, 19 - Malta Lines
6. Ignacius Sverus, CB, 20 - Athletico Sciuntis
13. Louisa Logan*, CB, 18 - Internationale
14. Saffi Mehzubontin*^, R/LB, 17 - Tabeck FC
20. Unnamed D3, B, 15 - Iskara Daii
21. Unnamed D4, B, 15 - Veles

The Midfielders
4. Panos Petropoulos, L/DM, 20 - Nemya Hotspurs
7. Ricky England, R/CM, 21 - Penningworth United - AOCAF 23 Winner
8. Na-Me, C/AM, 21 - Karak Ungor Chiefs
15. Rashid Mus'haf, C/DM, 17 - Jhanna City
16. Andvari Bazrimar^, AM , 18 - Karak Ungor Cheidfs
22. Yuri Vegachenko, R/LM, 16 - Hallad Reavers

The Forwards
9. Velat Thayil, SC, 20 - Cedrus Soundgardia
10. Diamontii Di Bradini*, Captain, SC, 21 - Jhanna Praetoran University - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
11. Hayden Albertini, SC, 18 - Tabeck FC
17. Romeo Oscar, SC, 16 - Penningworth United
18. Luis Primo, SC, 17 - Vecchio Victors
23. Lotar Kaii'n, SC, 15 - FC Farça

The Formation
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarDBC6.jpg

Home And Away Kits:
Kits created by:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarHome4-1.jpghttp://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarAway4.jpg

Imperial U-21 Squad (ages not limited for simplicity, but rest assured they are all under 21!)

Player ㅇ韓ㅇ ㅇ한ㅇ # POS
Jeong Pilgyo 鄭弼敎 정필교 1 K
Jang Junhwan 張駿桓 장준환 2 D
Bae Yongjun 裵勇俊 배용준 3 D
Noe Makya 雷膜若 뇌막야 4 D
Yi Beomsuk 李範奭 이범석 5 D
Seong Sammun 成三問 성삼문 6 M
An Changho 安昌浩 안창호 7 M
Shin Hyeiseong 申彗星 신혜성 8 M
Son Daeho 孫大鎬 손대호 9 M
Pak Gyuseon 朴圭善 박규선 10 F
Yi Eunju 李恩宙 이은주 11 F
Yi Haeung 李昰應 이하응 12 K
Yi Suyeong 李秀英 이수영 13 D
Yi Donguk 李東旭 이동욱 14 D
Yi Jonguk 李鍾郁 이종욱 15 M
Mun Hyeonyeop 門峴曄 문현엽 16 M
Seol Gihyeon 薛琦鉉 설기현 17 F
Yang Gyuseong 楊圭腥 양규성 18 K
Kim Yongji 金永智 김용지 19 D
Yang Manchun 楊萬春 양만춘 20 D
An Jaeuk 安在旭 안재욱 M
Kim Sungweon 金順權 김순권 22 M
Kim Mihyeon 金美賢 김미현 23 F

Coach Yu Giheung [유기흥]
Coach of Great Inspiration (convict guy who supposedly whacks his stick, but we haven't heard too much from him lately).

Playing Style: +3

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes
Godmod injuries to my players: Yes
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: no
Godmod Other Events: Yes


http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/daehanjeiguk/kit-youth.png

ooc: kits are all original handwork; no, I'm not in the business of making kits, because they take a lot of time to make, and I really don't like using MS Paint anyway...

Team Jeruselem!

Coach: Reverend John Smith of the Protestant Boys College

Formation: 4-4-2 (+1)

All players are male and Protestant

GK
James Skype (15) - Collects butterflies for a hobby
Taw Grisham (16) - Scared of girls especially naked ones

DEF
Ray Whashey (17) - Has trouble playing against female opponents
Chuck Connis (16) - The tough guy of the team
Kane Kross (18) - Might be Gay
William Jackson (17) - Wants to be Pastor
Obama Hussain (17) - Former Moslem
Gray Pokus (18) - Winner of the recent Jeruselem Overclockers Competition

MID
Claus Mark (17) - Rejected from the army for being too wimpy
Leyton Hobbit (15) - Very short player
Payne Okan (17) - Suffers from sunburn a lot
Dank Rozky (18) - Teased for having the same hair colour as Dazza Dallas
David Ouman (16) - Allergic to some types of grass
Enk Fallstat (20) - Likes hitting people when drunk (CAPTAIN)

STR
Baye Richard (17) - Vegetarian greenie commie
Uhan Gransky (19) - Known as K|ll3R on WOW
Adolf Himster (19) - Dislikes Jewish people ...
Jay Licken (16) - Prefers Catholic girls because they are more fun

THE ROCKET REPORT

NEW ROCKETS WANT SAME RESULTS

Starblaydia- They flew into Starblaydia this morning, looking to continue a budding legacy as one of the top teams of the Di Bradini Cup. But stepping onto the soil of a nation that has seen great recent successes with a World Cup and an AOCAF championship, stepped a new group of Rockets, most of them have never been to Starblaydia before. There are some returnees. Manager Brian Carson has been through it all and can share with them the legacy of Simeone Di Bradini, both as a legendary football player and as a man who devoted his life to this great sport. Captian Sheldon Talcott was here when the team lost to Daehanjeiguk, as was Kurt Allwine, and the Vilardi twins. Graduated from this level are everyone else, including the likes of Jeremy McAllister and Jeremy Brooker.

Coming to Starblaydia will be a hungry group of newcomers, who want to show the world their own individual talents. One such player is Pocono City’s Brett Carlson, who signed with Carson’s Capitals at just 14 years old. The move created somewhat of a stir around the Empire, because it was he became the youngest player ever to receive a professional contract, plus the fact that it was Pocono City. A blatant case of the rich getting richer and preventing a smaller market team from getting their hands on a player with a lot of potential. He stepped right on the pitch with the Capitals and showed the composure of a veteran right away. Carlson is still a raw talent, but at just 16 years of age, he should do very well at this level, and work well with the Vilardi twins. Speaking of the 20-year old twins, Jennifer and Shannon are two of the four non-newcomers, and will give Carlson two great weapons to work with up front. Also, fans who have watched Newmanistan’s senior team in the last two World Cup cycles have gotten familiar with Loudon’s Kevin Carrigan, a staple at the center midfield spot. Carrigan’s also been Newmanistan’s number one man to deliver corner kicks. On this team is Kevin’s little brother, Kyle, who at 15 signed with the Olympia Gladiators, making Olympia have no room to complain about Carson’s signing of Carlson. Olympia obviously wanted to get him in the mix before Loudon had a chance to get their hands on him. Well, right now Kyle looks like he is a very similar talent as his brother, showing an uncanny knack for delivering corners himself at a young age, and also plays the midfield position with great confidence. Carson has brought with him a young Brett Prescott, too, by the name of James Seidler. Seidler, growing up, has idolized Prescott for his ability to rough up and get in the head of the opponent’s top scorers, and for the most part, do it in a way where he doesn’t get booked as often for it as you think he would. Seidler always wanted to be that kind of a player, and he has done a good job of it so far. Playing for the Springfield Thoroughbreds, the 17-year old enjoys this style of play and won’t mind showboating a little bit. Playing against kids of his age, he may be a lot more effective in getting in the heads of the opponent’s young scorers.

The backfield, with captain Sheldon Talcott, may be a little more physical then the last two Newmanistanian teams that came to Starblaydia. Talcott was here in the 5th Di Bradini Cup, but as a substitute, so he didn’t see much action. In Loudon, he has blossomed quite a bit since then, coming into his own both in defensive awareness and in strength. The three people he will be playing with back there are players who will also be eligible for this team four year down the road when the 7th version comes around. Scott LaFave of Daytopia, Brett Taratino of South Tier, and Alex Lampert of Centralia all have taken much different routes to get where they are today, but as a unit, should be very exciting to watch as they gel and learn together. LaFave in Daytopia plays for one of the worst teams in the NPL, and as such, he finds himself defending quality scoring opportunities very often. But this has made him a much better player, because when you’re so used to it coming at you constantly, and from the best players in the Empire, you can’t help but get better, and LaFave has. Playing against his peers, age wise, here may actually be pretty easy compared to what he faces with Daytopia. Then there’s Taratino, a hard nosed physical defender who recently signed a big contract with South Tier. Expect him to pick up a few cards before this Cup is over. Alex Lampert, from Centralia, has been blessed to play in the Centralia defensive system. Centralia is, by far, the premier destination in the Empire for the development of young defenders, and may actually be one of the best in the world as the Empire’s reputation grows on the world scale. Lampert is also very intelligent, as his father is a brain surgeon. Alex could have gone in that route himself, many think, but his athletic ability and love for football has sent him to pursue an athletic career. After signing his big contract with Centralia, it’s already paying off, and his father most definitely approves. The goalkeeper is Matt Sullivan from the Hastings Crusaders. Sullivan in a budding 17 year old talent, who like LaFave, has blossomed early because he plays for a team that is constantly defending, and in Sullivan’s case, conceding chances on net. It has made him a very alert keeper. Matt’s contract with Hastings expires after the season, and a good showing here will probably see him get picked up by a bigger name club. Loudon, a team in need of goalkeeping, is the most often mentioned team that could pick him up.

They come to Starblaydia looking for success. Perhaps they will be inspired not only by what the Newmanistanian teams have done here in the past, or the legacy of the great Simeone Di Bradini, but just in playing in a nation that recently pulled off a remarkable double, winning both a World Cup and an AOCAF championship. It’s their time to shine.

The Group Draw! (edited in to opening post also)

Group A
Starblaydia
Taeshan
Cafundéu
Kansiov

Group B
Candelaria And Marquez
Elves Security Forces
Blouman Empire
Ameriganastan

Group C
Newmanistan
Krytenia
Yafor 2
Land de Wood

Group D
Daehanjeiguk
Jeruselem
Sorthern Northland
Lovisa

Candelaria And Marquez National Under-21 Football Squad for the Sixth Di Bradini Cup

Permissions: The usual drill – prior warning of anything too unusual would be nice, otherwise take the globular mollusc presented and do with it what thou will.

Squad:

Manager: Following in the now rather deep footprints of Lloyd Donnelly (who went on to become the senior side’s boss), Adam Williamson (who went on to become manager of the biggest club in Kura-Pelland, United Trilan), Andy Le Lan (who went on to become manager of the biggest club in C&M, Albrecht FC) and Jerry Huntick (who… um…), comes Trevor Organ.

In common with the DBC2 winner Donnelly, Organ is a former Albrecht FC manager – albeit of a rather more recent vintage. Once the club goalkeeper, then goalkeeping coach, Organ stunned the CMSC by guiding the Scorpions to the league title on his first season in charge. After three seasons at the helm – during which time the club remained competitive whilst falling just short – Organ opted to abandon the tangled, interwarring boardroom at Albrecht in favour of international management with Hopeless SC.

Theoretically he’s still employed by their FA but, on account of the country not actually existing any more, the CAMAFA not unreasonably decided that he was a free agent and offered him the role several months ago. A more offensively-minded individual than his most recent predecessor; Organ is a motivator rather than a tactical genius, capable of squeezing the vest best out of very ordinary players. He’ll certainly need to do just that in Starblaydia…

Organ will be accompanied by his long-time assistant, and former Albrecht FC youth team coach, David Stone. Also along for the ride will be former C&M international Kieron Tomlinson and Hopeless SC native Anne Gold, who may come in very handy indeed…

Organ’s probable first team will consist of Elduayén; Wangen – Kemp – Julio – Mendoza; Cohen – Jones – Mercado – Fattori; Smith and, um, Someone Else, in a 4-4-2 that’s so classic it was probably used by the Phoenicians. However, the line-up is just a guess, and will in any case change throughout the group stage to allow for injuries, exhaustion and tactical changes.

Goalkeepers:

23. Peppi Elduayén, Aged 21, Beersheba United [Jeruselem]
A bouncy wee moppet, Elduayén won’t be the first female ‘keeper to take to the field in C&M colours, but that previous occasion didn’t exactly go wonderfully well. Perhaps there’s just an incredible lack of decent young ‘keepers (the Candelarias seem to be producing more than enough players still, just in all the wrong positions), or perhaps, for a girl, she’s actually rather good. We Shall See…

1. Daniel Renard, 21, Alvery Blades [on loan from Turks’ Club]
An excellent distributor, who could probably play centre midfield if needs be, though Renard is worryingly small and could run to fat as he gets older. He’s a rare beast though – a young Candelariasian ‘keeper playing first-team football, albeit in the CMSC2

13. Harry Rosalia, 18, Mayo Valley
A tad young? Aye, just a bit, but after an impressive loan spell at the lower-league Hanlon Warbirds, this supremely confident young man has forced his way into the Mayo first XI and is clearly going to be one to watch.

Defenders:

2. Arthur Wangen, 21, Northpoint Sealions , [b]STARTING RIGHT-BACK
A solid defender who’s comfortable in possession, as long as he doesn’t inch beyond the half-way line; Wangen has plenty of first-team experience in the Empire but, as with the Jeruselem-based girls, we can only wonder about the quality he’s facing day in, day out.

6. Hansson Kemp, 21, Radyukevich, STARTING CENTRAL DEFENDER
In the final reckoning, C&M had quite a few centre-halves to pick from – making Kemp’s call-up slightly puzzling. Perhaps Organ feels that experience counts, for the short little hacker has been playing for the Jukos for well over a season and starred (kinda) at the previous DBC.

5. Hugo Julio, 20, Fallon United [on loan from Cathedral City], STARTING CENTRAL DEFENDER
Yea, I know, it’s troubling, isn’t it? Harris Matthews’ last-minute injury forced the Caires Sports star – and C&M’s best young defender – out and Julio in, and into the first XI by all accounts. An athletic player who’s been the difference for the Foogoos in the CMSC2 this year. ‘Tis worth emphasising the ‘2’ bit, though.

3. Grey Mendoza, 21, Caires Sports, STARTING LEFT-BACK
At least Matthews’ club colleague Mendoza makes the squad; a skinny young lad with ridiculous hair who can’t put up with much ill-treatment but can run about camply all afternoon if needs be.

14. Andrés Quirot, 19, El din Marbles
The utter, utter, utter paucity of young defenders (on account of all those bloody foreigners in the CMSC, y’see) is shown up by the presence of this clearly talented but horribly youthful and utterly inexperienced right-back. With a bit of luck, he won’t be needed.

12. Reuben Blakeman, 19, C.A.L.
If C&M has a defensive future, it may be all wrapped up in this boy. That he pushed former national team captain Benji Fu out of the C.A.L. first team is no great shakes (Kemp did the same thing last year at Radyukevich, after all), but Blakeman is also physically impressive, powerful, fast and cool both in the air and on the floor. He’s also called Reuben, which is always a bonus in C&M, and he really could go far.

20. Barry Adekunde, 20, Albrecht Independent
Since appearing at the DBC5, God’s Power Adekunde moved to Port of Clotaire and now sits on the fringes of the senior squad. One would have to be charitable indeed to suggest that Barry, the second of the eight (thus far) Adekunde siblings, could possibly go the same way, but C&M really are struggling for left-backs as well, sadly. We really should naturalise one.

Midfielders:

14. Niv Cohen, 21, Albrecht Turkish, STARTING RIGHT MIDFIELDER
The key man – if he performs, so might C&M; if he doesn’t, they won’t. The price of Candelariasians is always elevated when moving between CMSC clubs (which is why it so rarely seems to happen these days), and Turkish were forced to really shell out for the MN Smith starlet. They were rewarded by a confident, pacey, intelligent and accurate goalscorer and flanking playmaker, who may become a true international star if he bulks up a little over the next season. He already has a TQCC final goal to his name, anyroad.

8. George Jones, 21, Gamboa FC, STARTING ATTACKING MIDFIELDER
Involved in the Gamboa first-team since he was fifteen, this cup will give Jones an excellent chance to prove that he’s not just another lost talent. An elusive player who can dip in and out of games, Jones is still a potential match-winner but when it’s not going right he really can look awful.

4. Joel Mercado, 21, Natestadt Nationalisten [Capitalizt SLANI], STARTING HOLDING MIDFIELDER
Powerful and balanced, Mercado is another player more accustomed to life in second tier football – albeit in the Élite league. Thing is though, Albrecht Turkish presumably let him go for a reason… and perhaps we’ll discover what that is in Starblaydia.

17. Ryan Fattori, 21, Albrecht FC, STARTING LEFT MIDFIELDER
No relation to former under-21 defender Reuben or Albrecht Herald reporter Morgan; the latest Candelariasian Fattori has been one of the finds of the season. Propped up at times by a talented Scorpions side, the winger is none-the-less a busy bee with a cultured left foot (what does that mean?) who also adds some much needed size to the midfield.

7. Rio Kwan, 19, Albrecht Independent
A really very surprisingly nod as Cohen’s back-up, Kwan is quick and tricksy and has lit up the CMSC2 this term… but that’s not exactly hard. Plus, we haven’t produced a decent Asian player since Fred Ma.

22. Tom Osborne, 20, Green Island
Certainly not particularly considered one likely to make the grade at Green Island (not when they can just go and get an Eesseffian to take up the slack when needs be, anyway), but the diminutive little (on account of being diminutive) playmaker has had quite a debut season thus far. Blessed with superb vision, Osborne lacks physical power and clearly has little real confidence in his own ability but, if Organ can unleash him, he could prove to be the real deal.

16. Georgina Plowman, 19, Palestine Warriors [Jeruselem]
Considered perhaps the least promising of the cadre of girls sent over to Jeruselem, the young West Candelarian has taken to life over there worryingly well. From a footballing point of view, she’s started to fill into her lanky frame now, and her balls skills are second to none, but… y’know… she’s a girl.

11. Gary Mills, 21, FC DePardenti [Nethertopia]
C&M aren’t particularly struggling for young CMSC lefties at the moment, so Mills’ recall to the squad comes as something of a surprise (no, really?). He’s quick, certainly, and Organ and co have clearly spent enough time across the waters in Nethertopia watching him to vouch for his abilities.

Forwards:

9. Tom Smith, 21, Arrigo Portuguese, STARTING FORWARD
The under-21s’ hero has always come in the shape of a goalscorer thus far, from Luke Naylor to Joe Cunningham to Jason Federici. Smith might be the one who actually goes on to become a senior team regular, despite his inauspicious early career. Dumped from Green Island, the powerful right peg of the trawlerman’s son has been sticking them in like nobody’s business in the league, and Smith could well prove a latish bloomer in the mould of a certain I. Vélez. Or not, as the case may be.

18. Abdul Ibadulla, 18, Radyukevich, STARTING STRIKER?
Spies in the Small Blues camp suggest that the youngster may be set to go straight into the first team in Starblaydia, but that’s still far from nailed-on. The big man to Smith’s stockier proportions, Ibadulla possess wise feet (apparently) and a superb sense for goal, though his shots are often low and weak. He has a beard as well, which might get in the way rather.

10. James Falconer, 21, Natestadt Nationalisten [Capitalizt SLANI]
Tall, muscular and unusually good-looking for an Anglo Candelarian, Falconer plays alongside his countrymen Mercado and Can Cetin in the USC. He’s okay. Likes flyfishing.

19. Richard Arnold, 21, McDonald SC
Less the out-and-out striker as his colleagues, Arnold has a quick pair of feet, a pleasing range of passing, and one of those Arjen Robbeny faces that makes him look about forty. To be fair, he’s had all the weight of the world (or at least McDonald Sports Club) on his shoulders lately and, if C&M’s DBC tenure is a long one, the club are surely doomed without him.

21. Lelliot-Leigh Sodje, 20, Jerusalem United [Jeruselem]
If Plowman’s presence is merely to keep up some kind of perverse unofficial quota at work in the under-21 squad, then her colleague Ella Sodje is the real deal. Were she not in Starblaydia, via Jeruselem, this month she might well have popped up on the track in Columbia, but lightning pace from a standing start isn’t her only attribute. She can play a bit too, by all accounts. Not at this level, though, not really. That’d just be silly.

Kit:

Why, those right purty ediraf ones.

http://i176.photobucket.com/albums/w175/candelariaandmarquez/CAMHome4.jpg http://i176.photobucket.com/albums/w175/candelariaandmarquez/CAMAway4.jpg

THE ROCKET REPORT

GROUP DRAW SET

Starblaydia- The official Group Draw for the 6th Edition of the great Di Bradini Cup was held this morning with the representatives of the sixteen football associations eagerly awaiting where they would be placed, who they would play, and where. Newmanistan ended up being placed in Group C with three very interesting opponents: Krytenia, Yafor 2, and Land de Wood. On the surface, some may breath a sigh of relief at the draw, but we assure you that this is a much tougher group then it appears (and no we’re not just saying that to increase the hype factor). With a new group of Rockets in Starblaydia, there are no givens. They will need to work hard and earn everything they get.

We are still awaiting word on the order of these games, but expect that soon enough, and are sure that Brian Carson and company are well aware of who their first opponent will be. The three opponents in which the Rockets will be facing all have their own unique stories, the first of whom is Krytenia. No, not West Starblaydia. The crisis in this part of the world is over, and Krytenia is a free nation once again, but how will their football team be treated by the Starblaydi faithful. This is, we believe, Krytenia’s first interregional appearance since becoming Krytenia once again. They are obviously elated to rid themselves of the West Starblaydia name. It should make for an interesting contest, and Newmanistan will find themselves in the middle of it. Not that it really affects the Rockets any, as the Empire is here to play football, but for the Newmanistanians that make the trip, it’s something to keep in mind. Also in the group is Yafor 2, a nation in which the Rockets will be meeting for the first time, and could loom as the spoiler in the group. Their senior side generally qualifies for the World Cup with consistency. Then you have Land de Wood, a nation that will be in the 29th Baptism of fire, and may be one of the leading contenders right now to win that coveted trophy. This is a nation that has already opened some eyes around the world. It is a relatively new country, but one with big aspirations and what appears to be a strong determination to reach those goals. They have already begun competing against the world in the Oxen Cup, and their president has made it no secret that they wish to do what Newmanistan did eight years ago. Pull of a Di Bradini Cup championship, and then a Baptism of Fire championship. They’ll try to follow our model, so perhaps it is only fitting that the teams will go head to head in group play. Land de Wood should be aware though, that Newmanistan is the one team they cannot sneak up on, because coach Brian Carson went through the same thing not too long ago, and he knows that with the right amount of heart and dedication, with talent mixed in, that anyone can do anything in this tournament. And for Brian Carson, this tournament itself is a bit of a revival. True, his job coaching the junior team was never part of the Cup of Harmony ultimatum which he passed on the last day, but he still wants to have a good showing nonetheless.

In all, it seems like a group in which the Rockets should be able to find themselves a top two spot, but there is enough here for them to fall flat on their face if they are not ready for what they are about to face. Newmanistan is ready for the Di Bradini Cup, and with new players eager to show the world that the Empire has a deep pool of young talent beyond the players that have previously came to Starblaydia. It’s that time once again! Let’s hope for another great ride!

Group Draw Announced

The group draw for the Di Bradini cup was announced yesterday, and the Lil' Purple Knights will have to take on Starblydia the hosts, Cafundeu the team that knocked the big Knights out of te last world cup playoffs, and Kansiov a team we know little about. The Knights did not get a favorable draw as they are the 8th ranked team entering this tournament and they will have to face a young hard charging group from Cafundeu that wish to advance again. The polls are in and it looks like Starblaydia, and either the Knights or the Cafs will advance in this group.

"Dammit Juras, have you read this? What does Santapa think he is getting at really? We all know that the DBC is not our strong point, but this is abosolute nonsence, espicially after his article before the semifinal of the World Cup." the red faced and furious Drainer Forri exclaimed. His partner, Juras Delamere, cautiously made his way into the main office of Valanora Express headquarters. His head sank when he realized that Drainer was holding up the lastest issue of the Express' sports section.

"Yes Drainer, I have read it. In fact, I was the one to give Ron the idea to write the story. If you don't mind me saying sir, with the recent run of luck of ours, it is rather fitting and written in truth."

Slamming his fist upon his desk soo hard that the red cup that read "Employee of the Year, 20,005" fell over, spilling all of his pens, pecils, highlighters, and a cigar onto the tiled floor. "How could you of let him write such an article Juras? This is not what the public needs to be reading after everything that has occured the last three years, it's simply not the time to be soo bold."

"Well Drainer, he is the cheif editor of the paper, it's not like we really could stop him from printing it if we wanted to. Besides, I think you're underestimating the mental stregnth of the citizens just a little my friend. Yes we have had troubles of many recently, of which all of them we were able to successfully overcome. Granted that Elune had a hand in two of those, yet it was through our stregnth and fortitude that we were able to persevere and here we are, almost completely back to how the nation was before the Tides."

"I don't care if he is the damn editor, I still don't like it one bit. If it were up to me, I'd make him do photography for the next year after an article like this."

"That of course is your perogative sir, but I must remind you of your place in the pecking order. You are merely a journalist with some tenure in your pocket where Ron has been here for nearly ten thousand years, back when the paper was first created. So please, just give it a rest will you. Go home and have a nice dinner with your wife and be thankful for all the blessings Elune has given you and our people and care not about what Ron or anyone else might be doing or have done."

Valanora Express
Freefall

What a difference a year does make in this wacky world we live in. Just a mere twelve months ago we were on top of the world in football, surely about to have a chance to defend our title in the World Cup. Our people were still gone, stolen away from us by the unholy invasion of the demons and the drow uprising. Now here we are just a year later and all things seem to have been switched around on their axis. That dream of defending the title was ruined by a destined run by Starblaydia on their way to a third title, leaving us just the token reward of third place. Through some divine intervention our fallen loved ones were returned to us, although with a slightly different demeanor and strange red markings. Our hopes for the TQCC, GC, and SBCC were dashed after horrible campaigns in the group stages by everyone but Raynor City.

And now! we have been drawn into a very difficult and dangerous group in the Sixth edition of the Di Bradini Cup. Despite being one of the top four teams in the rankings, we were forced to be a second seed due to the hosts being placed in as a first seed. As a result, we get to face another first seed, and a very dangerous one indeed. Two time champion Candelaria And Marquez are the first of our difficult foes. Despite their pervese obsession with our footballing talent, the Canderlaria government refuses to have any interaction with our own. They are also a wretched people when it comes to the tolerance and treatment of non-humans. That is not enough, they are remarkably skilled in football, although their senior national team did not manage to even qualify for the last World Cup! All of this said, they are a very potent and dangerous side, as their history in the competition suggests, and we would be fortuious indeed if we were to come away with a point in the clash.

But it gets better my friends, as we get the Blouman Empire empire as well. Remember not so long ago that they gave the Demotians fits in their qualifying campaign and have been nuisances for many sides during their time in international competition. With the recent run of luck that Elven football has had, I am quite fearful that we will fall victim to a very emphatic upset against the Empire. Forget the fact that our talent is far from being anywhere near their peak, where as our human counterparts are, it is the fact that we simply don't have a tactician who knows how to even use youth players. Sure our current manager studied under Mannasuch, but does the great Raynor City boss even know how to use youth? I say nay, as he is always using veterans in his line up when given the choice. Just look at how long the memorizing Starblaydi Kuu was kept on the pine.

Last is the new nation of Ameriganastan. You would think this is an easy three points for the Marauders, but without a roster or previous expierences in international football, there is no one for us to scout! This anonomity has worked well for the Monks in the past, as well as various national teams, with the name Audioslavia in World Cup 29 coming to mind. No, we will fall victim to not one, but a duo of remarkable upsets and be on the first ship back to Valanora before you could say Nakamura!

Article by Ron Santapa

Somewhere north of London, England


No, not Watford


No, not Welwyn Garden City, either. Why would we be in Welwyn Garden City, for heaven’s sake? Who on earth comes from Welwyn Garden City?


Well… Alright, but I don’t know who Nick Faldo or David James are. I don’t think they’re even real. Stop trying to confuse me.


Anyway, this is actually Kilgarney Monastery, north of London, the Kingdom of England, the Lowland Clans


Years ago…


Sort of. Don’t let yourself get bogged down in the particulars


Kilgarney was a rather forbidding little place at the best of times, as befitted the site of centuries of religious crackpotism; but, as night was falling, the monastery cast an ostentatiously gothic shadow over the pitch, and the gloom was genuinely unnerving. In truth, Kieron Tomlinson was used to the former – the Millerman Sheppard Stadium was hardly renowned for the architectural brilliance of its pointy, looming north stand – and these days there were plenty of evening games in the CMSC. He wasn’t used to feeling like this however; all leaden, exhausted, like he was trudging around in a suit of armour.

In all fairness to the player, he actually was trudging around in a suit of armour. This in itself wasn’t especially surprising, which the left-back found a depressing thought. The robes had been bad enough; for, while the new kits assigned to the ‘Big Blues’ – as they were apparently going to be called – were hardly the latest fashion, at least it they didn’t feel as though you were sharing them with several different species of mammalia. But now they were being forced to don iron plating.

It would be the final test of the preliminary stages of The Tournament, and the first to have been thought up by anyone other than the sadistic monks who ran this place and had taken it upon themselves to organise this inane excuse for a Baptism of Fire. Instead, they’d opened up the final challenge to suggestions from the various neophyte squads involved. Kieron had never heard of Kura-Pelland before this month, and still wouldn’t know if he’d ever passed one of ‘em in the street, but he felt instinctively sure he and his people would bear a grudge against them for this, for many years to come.

Yes, Kieron kept telling himself, as Yasser Zaghloul and a similarly plated Kansiov player thudded into each other and collapsed in a mildly erotic heap in the centre of the pitch, it was the same for both teams. But he still couldn’t see the point. Nothing was going to come of this ridiculous tournament. He should be on the beach right now, building himself up for pre-season training, not stuck in some godforsaken country – not literally, obviously, hence the monks – randomly kicking lumps out of an equally exasperated Kansiov winger.

The whistle blew as another attack petered out, and Mark Baker on the sidelines began gesticulating wildly, indicating that it was time to give the unarmoured half of the team a go on the pitch. It wouldn’t last, Kieron knew, and the Albrecht FC veteran wandered over to the side of the pitch, removed his tassets and hauberk, and hopped over the hastily constructed outer wall to get his breath back. It was almost pitch black here, and empty; the monks and assorted Lowland Clansians, or whatever they were, armed with clipboard and stern-looking marker pens, were over on the other side with the two managers and their backroom staff, along with the rest of the unused substitutes.

In the shadows though, a shape was moving; unhurried but purposeful, flitting between the darkest patches and joining them briefly in perfect matrimony, before moving on. Finally, it came to a stop barely two metres from Kieron, and joined him in looking out over the pitch. It then swore gently, under its breath.

The left-back tried not to look. The Lowland Clans, or the Kingdom of England at any rate, seemed a normal enough place, but there were strange forces at work here. As a Candelariasian, albeit not – by his own admission – the brightest one in town, he knew perfectly well to dismiss such notions. They were a sensible people. God, angels, the Devil? Oh, if you must. But ghosts and goblins and aliens? Leave that to the continentals.

But… Mister Hernández had told them things. And so had Miss Taylor. Indeed, they’d both told them all basically exactly the same list of things, at exactly the same time, except that they clearly hadn’t, because that really didn’t make any sense and made his brain hurt. He’d been told that was just what happened when you flew beyond your immediate region but, given some of the stuff they’d told the squad the previous month, he couldn’t help wondering if there was more to it than that.

He’d bought a lot of it, anyway. He’d drawn the line at the elves. But… They did have unusually pointy ears. And they were text-book enigmatic.

He risked a glance over to the elf, assuming that was what it was, who turned at looked straight back at him.

“Hi,” he ventured.

“Mm,” the dark figure muttered vaguely. “They, um… They are Kansiov, right?”

“Er… Yeah. And we’re Candelaria And Marquez,” Kieron added.

“Right. Well, that’s a mouthful, isn’t it?” the other figure sighed.

“Arright, arright, come on, lads!”

Kieron looked away, over to where Baker was shouting. Once the left-back had glanced back, his new companion had vanished. He shrugged, and hopped back over the wall.

“Don’t put yourself out unduly in the last ten minutes,” Baker was explaining. “We know we’ve won this, we know we’ve got Vephrall next. They’re bloody good. Just forget about Kansiov, al–

“…get about Kansiov, alright?!” Trevor Organ was screaming, as Kieron blinked heavily and looked around himself. For a moment, he... It had felt like he was there, back in England. Whatever. He was in Starblaydia, he was coaching the under-21s. He was supposed to be coaching the under-21s.

“Kansiov, Lovisa, Taeshan… Forget about ‘em, alright? They’re nothing.” Organ continued. “We’re playing the bloody elves, arright? Y’know what Melbourne told you about, yeah? Well, these are they, and they’re bloody good. That tasty little wotzit… no offence girls… Delara; right? She’s a Zetaback, basically. You all know what that means. There’s no way you’re gonna be able to mark her out of the game, but remember she’s not a natural goalscorer yet. Focus on Anwamanë, Hansson, yeah, but let her get a few shots off, as long as they’re not gonna test Pep, right? From what I’ve seen, if she notches up a few misses early on, she’ll go to pieces for the rest of the game. Get the ball wide, people, I can’t stress that enough. Jurangil’s superb, but he can’t track back for toffee, so we need to exploit that back three! David’ll set you up, I want Hugo and Grey and Fatts against any other four on this pitch. Hansson, Art and Cohen on t’other, practising your breakaways. I’ll be with you guys in a moment.”

Kieron looked up as Organ wandered over.

“You alright, mate?” the manager asked. “You look a little dazed, I must say.”

“Yeah. Well, I’ve never been one for flying, you know that. I’ll be alright by tomorrow.”

“I hope so. We’re gonna need all the help we can get, I reckon. The Valanorans are really something this year. Bloumany are so unpredictable, they could do anything. Who knows about the other lot. They’re supposed to be clones as well, though. Crazy, innit…”

They watched and winced as Barry Adekunde went in hard on Lelliot-Leigh Sodje. The girl picked herself up after half a second on the floor, and gave her colleague a cheerfully threatening poke in the kidneys.

“Times change, don’t they?” Kieron muttered.

Organ grinned. “You remember when the Baptism of Fire squad was first named, with Reuben Uwakwe in goal? The very first C&M squad assembled for extra-regional play, and everyone considered it noteworthy that a second gen African was in the first eleven. Now all that matter’s is that Ella’s a girl. No-one even raised an eyebrow at Barry.”

“Oh, they did…”

“Yeah, but only ‘cos he’s a bit crap,” Organ smiled, away from the player’s earshot. “They don’t make left-backs like they used to, eh?” The manager patted Kieron on the back. “Come on, coach. Let’s get back into the fray.”

Kieron nodded, and trotted after Organ back onto the Tabeck training ground.

Some way behind them, near the trees, in the shadows; a shape was moving.

(Prior to the match against whoever it is)

Carson: Welcome everyone to Starblaydia. In just a few short moments we’ll be getting our Di Bradini Cup campaign going. I want you all to know how special of a tournament this is.

Lampert: Yeah, Simeone Di Bradini was an incredible player and a great man, I really wish I would have had the opportunity like the way the team did eight years ago.

Carson: We were really privileged, Alex, to have won the last Di Bradini Cup that he saw played on his turf while he was alive.

Talcott: And no doubt he is so proud right now given that Starblaydia pulled off the great double.

LaFave: I thought Simeone was coaching the blancmanges?

Carlson: His spirit and love for the game definitely will never die, even in the next life.

Carson: You guys know him pretty well, it’s really good to see. It shows how far we’ve come as an Empire in the last eight years that Simeone Di Bradini is a household name in our country now, too.

Lampert: Pretty hard not for it to be, we’ve done a good job in this tournament.

Carson: We’ve definitely made a good impression, and I want all of you to know that I feel that you all have the same kinds of talent and ability to go out there and do what the Rockets who came before you have done.

Carlson: Absolutely.

Talcott: Let’s just make sure our ranking doesn’t go to our head.

Carson: Yeah, you can kind of say we’ve come full circle. Coming here eight years ago at the bottom, and now we’re at the top.

LaFave: You get a lot of credit for that, coach.

Taratino: Yeah, I can’t wait to finally play for you and not just train.

Carson: Thanks guys, it’s nice to see us on top of the DBC rankings, but it took a whole lot of hard work to get there.

Carlson: And we’ll continue to give it to you coach.

Talcott: We have a reputation when we come to Starblaydia, and we must live up to it.

Carlson: For the Empire! For all of us to take our place in Di Bradini Cup tradition alongside the likes of J-Mac, Brooker, Hennis, and Drummond! Go Rockets!

Team: Go Rockets!

Carson: I believe in all of you. Let’s go out there and show them what we’re made of!

We are delighted to bring you the starting 11 for our first game. None of our Oxen Cup players are available for this game and so the team will line up as follows:
Formation: 4-4-2, Style: attackive (+1)
Steve Pilot
Daniel Delorit Curro Arnott Leyti Goldberg Joshua Ashton
Tom Darkless Charlot Avakian Garnet Aigner Woodrow Wilson
David Bomber John Little

A quick review of our group, well seeded last due to the fact we've never played u-21 football before, meant we were always going to get a tough group.
Newmanistan, ranked 1st, winners 2 tournaments ago, runner ups last time around
Krytenia, ranked 7th
Yafor 2, ranked 11th.
Not too bad, Newmanistan are always going to be the difficult ones, but the other two well you never know, we might sneak a victory or two, and 2nd place would mean we are in the quarter finals unless we've been fed some more mis-information. (see Oxen cup news)

RP options
My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod scoring events N
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out red cards to my players Y
Godmod other events N

Group D
Jeruselem
Sorthern Northland
Lovisa

The Boring Edition

So... you really want to know what's on the mind of the Han?

Not much really. Just the stigma of failing to win a second-straight title; the same sort of stigma that stung the Newmanistan team. And what sort of opposition is up against the Han? Well, in the opinion of many, pretty darned good opposition. We have Jeruselem, whom we only managed a 2-1 win in the semifinals last edition. We have Sorthern Northland, whose team is relatively new to the Han but dangerous at large to other teams in general. And we have Lovisa, which is just... well, Lovisa; strong defense that potentially crowd a narrow win to a disappointing result.

In all, the Han need to find an escape route through which the Quarterfinals will become open and apparent; in which case, the Han will face even stiffer resistance to claim their next title. It's all a tough road to the final match, and one can only wonder... just why do people think the Han are crazy?

The Fun Edition

Yesterday, an earthquake sent several shockwaves through the former wastelands of Tutustan. The country was most famous for its subject to an apparent nuclear assault by a random nuclear-wielding power, although who exactly it was, no one is certain. The earliest leads suggested Sorthern Northland, but seeing as the country doesn't even have nukes, these claims have been widely discredited. After all, what sort of country would launch their only nuclear stock at some damned random country that borders on oblivion. More credible sources suggest Bostopia is responsible.

Anyway, the earthquake ran through the entire countryside, leaving the random 25 cows and 16 pigs buried in rubble, along with the country's remaining ducks and geese. Environmentalists are troubled at the reckless disregard for widelife protection, noting that wild species in Tutustan have become extremely rare following the nuclear assault, which include the blue-footed booby, the headless horse, the tail-less snake, the flatulent frog. Whether any of these species continue to persist is a matter of unintelligent debate.

The Whacked Edition

The singing beans of Candelaria and Marquez (yes, they're still around) have petitioned the CMSC to allow some of their star players to participate in the Di Bradini Cup, following recent claims of inherent discrimination against their kind, especially by the Candelarisian majority. There are rumors spreading that the FCC (Frijoles Cantos Coalición) is considering a major political move to unite with the Marquezian minority and form a united front against discrimination, either Latino or ... bean.

We tried to get more information, but they kept on trying to talk to us in Bensroomese for some odd reason.

The WTFM Edition

Rumors that the price of pistachios in Starblaydia, particularly for Group D matches, has apparently angered the cricket population seeking an audience in the matches. Crickets apparently love pistachios, and even though they don't carry any currency with which to "buy" these nuts, they're concerned that fans would be less likely to eat the pistachios if they're too expensive, or if the fans are just too busy trying to throw the damned nuts at some random people.

"*chirp chirp*, *chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp*" remarked one member of the crickets petitioning the Starblaydian government and FA to intervene on behalf of those seeking reasonably priced pistachio nuts. "*chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp chirp*" he continued, reminding patrons to mind their next step while watching the football match.

The Solemn Edition

Yang Guifei died today.

The Graffitti Edition

:hail::soap::gas::gundge:

:eek:

:(

:$

The Bensroomese Edition

When being a tribe where the precipitation which is that place in Gwangju the comfort is extreme until, today the guard. Is welcomed will rise, up Korean drought condition and the city which is contiguous at 3 hours will bite in because expense. I rise it, but reading is bad enough that is the drought which is to Gwangju why this news, do not know how in appearance as a matter of. People it didn't riot get up in order between in case rumor be; In compliance with a sunset t starts the rain. Justly, it's probably because of we're the 4th petal that sends the bunch of 20 year-old youths whom is having because controlling the fact that is weak from same west excess makes the with random Bostopian catalogue street girl of the main stream which is severe is extreme and a separation occasionally.

They are incorrect and more the cow to needing the time them whom studies with realness for a test.

THE EMPIRE TIMES

Di Bradini Cup Group Draw

Last night the group draw for the 6th Di Brandini Cup the official international U21 tournament was conducted. With manager Jack Newport at Starblaydia eagerly awaiting to see who his challengers may be. The Blouman Eaglets have found themselves in Group B a tough group with Candelaria And Marquez, Eleves Security Forces (ESF) and newcomer Ameriganastan. With early favourites Clanderia and Marquez and ESF to be proceeding through to the finals this has not dam pend the spirits of the team or of Newport. It does however mean that the Eaglets will have to fight hard in all three games in order to make the finals and a slip up at any time in any game could make the difference between going through to the quarter finals or going home early. Newport has expressed reservations about the upcoming games, however, is still confident that the team should be able to get over the line "It will be a tough challenge for us but I know that we will be able to make the finals again and then we will take it from there". With the Cup about to start the team is busy preparing knowing full well that they are in for a hard long and tough group stage ahead of them.

[OOC: Once again, sorry for the brevity of my player descriptions - I have neither the time, nor the patience, to come up with the full-fledged explanations I use for my NSWC squads.]

Silver Wolves Roster


Manager: Isilvarnon Moraedenshar. The Ramen United manager is known for his abilities at coaxing the best out of his players - the broken-down squads handed to him, due to his lack of money, have consistently over-performed. Known for his ability to navigate the transfer market, Moraedenshar is especially recognized for his unorthodox formations, usually involving defensive midfielders. Nothing of that kind for this squad, however.
* - indicates starter.

*1)Goalkeeper: Tarakaran Divanlir. Age: 21. Club: IYC Uharan. A skilled diving goalkeeper, Divanlir plays with a young Uharan squad that has a lot of representation on this Di Bradini Cup team.

2)Goalkeeper: Ahadris Kolukernin. Age: 21. Club: IYC Kaharan. The back-up to Pahal Gafernad, Kolukernin is, apparently, quite disappointed with his club. Having spent most of the recently-concluded LIDYT season on loan at a disappointing IYC Odarian side, rumors of his permanent departure to, perhaps, another league are well-known and well-acknowledged.

*3)Left Defender: Ahagorsk Hilvantir. Age: 18. Club: Ajer FC Youth Team. The last relic of a once-bright Ajer FC youth program, Hilvantir is a rather intelligent and well-built player. He often receives comparisons to Nilan Bahsir, known to be one of the greatest at his position, for his build and abilities.

4)Left Defender: Jahakin Daans. Age: 21. Club: IYC Kaharan. Daans, a relative of the Yaforite American football star, is a powerful and large back-up, with a similar-sized mouth. Yet another player from the excellent IYC Kaharan youth system, Daans has been among the side that has lead IYC Kaharan to third place in the LIDYT in the recently-concluded season.

*5)Left Center Defender: Ajorlian Acurivan. Age: 21. Club: IYC Kaharan. Another player on IYC Kaharan, Acurivan is a strong candidate for LIDYT Young Player of the Year. He has developed into yet another Yaforite center defender, though more in the style of Thia Boley (a massive, physical player), than that of Lhatis Riegan (a thinner, more intelligent, more technically skilled playmaker). Nonetheless, he faces a lot of competition at the top level of the national team and is unlikely to break into the ranks, due to excellent seasons by Parwood City's Yaforite defense.

6)Left Center Defender: Agevar Vanorilin. Age: 21. Club: IYC Uharan. A fierce competitor, Vanorilin and Acurivan are well-known for their sometimes-harsh, sometimes-friendly rivalry, which has never gone further than a few fouls or a few words. Nonetheless, the two players now are on the same team and, if rumor is to be believed, Vanorilin is not happy at all at being Acurivan's back-up. Skill-wise, they are similar players, as they are stylistically, as well.

*7)Center Defender: Ahor Kalinkir. Age: 21. Club: Ramen United. He's back with his manager of his club side, and, if rumor is to be believed, Kalinkir is glad for it. The fluid center defender struggled in his first season in the LIDYT, and, partly through the year, was forced to be benched by his manager. Nonetheless, here he is, but many see his inclusion into the squad as a nod to talent over performance, for there is no question at the talent of Ramen United player, only at his ability to display that talent.

8)Center Defender: Kjarik Tashkir. Age: 21. Club: IYC Kaharan. Another Kaharan defender. Do I seriously need to say more? Well, maybe. He's good. He's played well. He's well-known. He's intelligent. He's taciturn. He's solid. He doesn't like time-wasting tactics. That enough for you?

*9)Right Center Defender: Venasir Nahorian. Age: 21. Club: IYC Uharan. Easily the best defender on this team, Nahorian is regarded as the next great Yaforite defender. Dropped from the U21 captaincy due to his ongoing feud with Jamie Durand (which still continues, incidentally), Nahorian is looking to prove just how good he really is in this Di Bradini Cup. And, yes, hopefully, injure his hated teammate, Durand, along the way. Of course, he'll probably be suspended if he does so, but some rivalries transcend that, you know?

10)Right Center Defender: Fariz Bullar. Age: 19. Club: IYC Ajer Youth Team. Recently picked up by IYC Ajer, using a bit of their burnable money, Bullar has been a bit of a mistake. A notably lax and lazy player, he has repeatedly skipped practices and come late to games. When he plays, though, he does make an impact. Ordinarily, his coaches don't let him play, understandably.

*11)Right Defender: Ahagarishk Va'ask. Age: 21. Club: IYC Uharan. Va'ask is one of a tribe of hill-men who are among the most fit people in the Grand Democratic Duchy. He comes from a long line of physical warriors and intelligent hunters, all of whom have learned the art of war from their ancestors. Yes, he has sculpted abdominals. Yes, he plays very physically. No, you won't enjoy it. Yes, you might get a foul or two. He does look pretty scary, even to the referees, though.

12) Right Defender: Vagor Vincarel. Age: 18. Club: Cardarel FC Youth Team. One of Cardarel's main goals in the offseason was to use the money they received from CF Mont-Pluie to invest in their youth system. The solid Vagor Vincarel is from Chelmar, but he happily agreed on his first professional contract, and joined the club's youth team, where he has performed rather well. They're pretty glad they invested their money in him, to be honest.

*13)Left Midfielder: Amario Otavias (Captain). Age: 21. Club: Chelmar FC. The best player on this squad, and the only one with considerable international experience, Otavias was a no-brain pick-up for the big-market club in Chelmar. His skill is, literally, unmatched. He's a brilliant dribbler, an excellent passer, a good taker of corner-kicks, a leader, a solid free-kick taker, and a brilliant penalty shooter. He's also a clubhouse leader, and one of the few players to be universally acknowledged as "just plain good", as one scout puts it. He is preparing for a long and fruitful career at Chelmar FC, hopefully with titles involved.

14)Left Midfielder: Alager Adirondu. Age: 19. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team. IYC Uharan have big hopes for the lad - their club's greatest weakness is on the wings, with the aging Ago'il and Aldunya as their wingers. Adirondu has done exceptionally well with the youth team and, once he turns eighteen, it is expected that he will immediately take a spot on the Uharan starting team. Now the next question is whether he can consistently perform at that level.

*15)Center/Defensive Midfielder: Atoras Riegan (Vice-Captain). Age: 19. Club: IYC Toralen Youth Team. Riegan is the younger brother of Yaforite national team vice-captain Lhatis Riegan, and he already has people telling him that he's far better than his brother. Lhatis also began his career as a defensive midfielder, but, while Lhatis became a center defender as his career progressed, Atoras has, instead, taken the center midfield position as his own. Regarded as one of the greatest talents to ever emerge from the city of Chelmar, Atoras has strength, power, intelligence, speed, and determination in his bag. If there is a criticism, it's his lack of experience in high-stress situations, and it remains to be seen whether he can succeed there.

16)Center Midfielder: Amhertus Civarnu. Age: 21. Club: IYC Darigeris. Civarnu started the whole season at an overachieving IYC Darigeris side, and he was a big reason behind their success. The silky center midfielder is a passer through and through, and his intelligent moves to the players around him set up many goals. It is unlikely that he will continue at an international level once he turs twenty-two, but he's a solid player to have on your team, if you aren't one of the big boys of Yaforite football.

*17)Right Midfielder: Ahershk Valinial. Age: 20. Club: Caires Sports Club [Candelaria And Marquez]. The only player on the Under-21 side to be based abroad. Valinial has been an integral part of the Knights' success in this season in the CMSC. Yes, he's very good. He had, prior to his inclusion in that side, been a back-up to Vashil Nahanor at Chelmar FC and he had wanted playing time. If he continues his recent vein of form, the right winger might just find himself doing that again - at a national team level. And, yes, the reason he's good is that he was found by some perceptive scouts from Caires Sports Club. Yes, let's heap praise on Sampson, shall we?

18)Right Midfielder: Varolan Dori'id. Age: 21. Club: IYC Toralen. After a couple of good youth seasons some time back, as well as an inclusion in the national team, Dori'id has returned to patent obscurity. That's not to say that he doesn't deserve it - one or two better-than-average seasons a career do not make.

*19)Attacking Midfielder/Striker: Danilo Silva. Age: 18. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, Chelmar. Half-Cafundelense. Good dribbler. Very good dribbler. He takes the skills of his Cafundelense mother and family to a Yaforite mindset. Usually an attacking midfielder, Isilvarnon Moraedenshar is pioneering a new striker force of Danilo Silva and Jamie Durand and, if all goes as he expects, this may be the next great Yaforite pairing. The only great Yaforite pairing, if you want to be totally fair. Silva, who was called up to the national team at fifteen and started several games in the World Cup proper (before he was injured by a defender from Demot), has matured slightly and will most likely play the role of a supporting striker in this pairing.

20)Left Striker: Van Corudinja. Age: 20. Club: IYC Vanan Youth Team. He'll start when he gets to IYC Vanan's starting team. Apparently, he reminds Ian Felsenfeld of...Ian Felsenfeld.

*21)Right Striker: Jamie Durand. Age: 21. Club: IYC Toralen. Half-Zwangzugian, half-Starblaydian, born in Yafor 2, has Yaforite citizenship. Don't ask about his parentage. He has a bit of a feud going on with Venasir Nahorian, which is often fueled by Durand's intense dislike of racial insults (such as "'grammer"). One thing Durand does have a lot of skill at, however, is scoring goals, and, in that regard, there is no Yaforite (apart from maybe David Insfield), who can match him. He uses his Starblaydian finishing ability, his Yaforite game vision and his Zwangzugian, um, math skills to score a lot of goals. Yeah. That made sense.

22)Right Striker: Avajer Kalindin. Age: 20. Club: Vanan FC Youth Team. He's not very good or interesting. He can pass a bit, though.

The Silver Wolves play in a 5-3-2, a -1, if you're into that kind of thing.
My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: Yes
Godmod Other Events: Yes

[OOC: Newmanistan - you seem to have confused "Yafor 2" with my/Bazalonia's puppet "Yafalonia and Bazor 2". The latter has an association called FAIL and is hosting the Baptism of Fire. The former (me) has neither.]

Kansiovian 6th Di Bradini Cup Roster

We Wish them all the best!

*Runs off for a doze of Vodka*

Manager
Bogdan Alexi, Aged 51
The New Hope for Kansiovian Attacking Football. He hopes the success in his policy on simple football, with a rather simple 4-5-1 formation would inspire the senior team, which tends to play 9-0-1 Formations.

Goalkeepers
99.- David Fedotov, Aged 21 - GK - Rostov Rovers
16.- Yakov Danilov, Aged 18 - GK - Kansiov United
34.- Stepan Chebotarev, Aged 15 - GK - Kansiov United

Defenders
14.- Boris Grigoriev, Aged 17 - LB - Kansiov City F.C.
17.- Yuri Panin, Aged 15 - CB - Kansiov United F.C.
24.- Stanislav Kozlov, Aged 19 - CB - Kansiov United F.C
26.- Timur Leontyev, Aged 16 - RB - Neglev Eagles
27.- Roman Bellic, Aged 17 - CB - Liberty City (Foreign Club)
28.- Niko Bellic, Aged 15 - LB - Liberty City (Foreign Club)
30.- Anton Chernov, Aged 21 - CB - Orlov Rangers

Midfielder
29. - Evgeniy Valentin, Aged 21 - LW - Kansiov United F.C
12.- Iosif Miroslav, Aged 19 - LDM - Kansiov United F.C
16.- Filipp Petia, Aged 18 - CAM - Kansiov City F.C
9.- Vasily Ilari , Aged 21 - RDM - Everton F.C (Foreign Club)
11.- Vadim Benedikt , Aged 15 - RW - Kansiov United
32.- Yuliy Miron, Aged 19 - RM - Orlov Rangers
47.- Marlen Pyotr, Aged 21 - CM - Neglev Eagles

Forwards
1.- Joseph Stalin, Aged 21 - CF - Prochnya Highlanders
4.- Faddey Varlaam, Aged 16 - ST - Kansiov United F.C
7.- Vassily Andrey, Aged 19 - CF - Kansiov City F.C


Kansiov plays in a 4-5-1, a -2
My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: No
Godmod Other Events: Yes



Kit

Home
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Away
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KNOW YOUR ROCKETS: Brett Carlson, ST, Pocono City Capitals
#1 of ?? in a series.

When the Di Bradini Cup gets underway in Starblaydia, hundreds of young football players will be looking to make a name for themselves. Tundra Falls may have the Proving Grounds, but the nation of Di Bradini is perhaps better described as a “teaching ground” for the best young talent in the world. Newmanistan brings a new unknown group of players as far as the world is concerned. They’ve begun to get some domestic recognition, but the world scale is a whole new level.

Many people see Brett Carlson as having the potential to be one of the best players that the Empire has ever produced, but that’s just all a bunch of hype right now. After all, Brett is just sixteen years of age, and to make statements that he can be better then players who have gone before him are unfair, both to those other players, and to Brett himself. When Carlson was just 14 years of age, he was approached by Brian Carson at a high school football game. Brett’s team had just won a game 11-0, a contest in which Carlson scored eight goals, and assisted on the three others. Clearly, it wasn’t fair. Brett’s talent level was insanely better then the kids he was playing against, and he needed to be doing something else besides playing high school football. No Newmanistan Premier League had ever signed a 14 year old before, or a 15 year old for that matter, but there was no explicit rule against it. Ever since the NSL was disbanded in favor of the premier league model, and the annual 17-18 year old draft was also done away with in response to a Nethertopian team signing away Alex Parnett before Alex became draft eligible. Now, there was nothing stopping Brian Carson from claiming his right to the player with an almost identical last name. Carson was informed of Carlson by one of his scouts of the Pocono City Capitals, and when his team headed out to play Dover City, he made the stop to see Carlson in action. And man, was Brett ever impressive in his eight goal game. Carson immediately got on the phone to his assistants and had a contract drawn up the next day. Brett Carlson, just 14 years of age, was property of the Pocono City Capitals.

Carlson knew he’d be a star along, growing up in the town of Strausser, which has a C league team of its own, and just 35 miles outside of Dover City, he had been a participant in youth football ever since he was six years old. His mother, Bethany recalls, “I remember when we put Brett in that first football league when he was a kid. He just wanted to do it for fun, we never knew how good he was going to be. That first game he played the coaches made him get off the field because he was just so dominant. He never gave anyone else a chance to score, mainly because no one could get the ball away from him. The coaches told me that my son needed to play against older kids. And he was a six year old in a 6-9 year old league. I was amazed.” The Carlsons were a little uneasy about putting their kid in the 10-12 year old youth league, so Brett didn’t participate in an organized league again until he was eight. He still had plenty of football experience, playing with the kids in the neighborhood, many of them were older, and they still couldn’t contain him. Brett recalls back, “I was the youngest kid out there, but they couldn’t keep up with me. I was faster and smarter and soon enough they all got pretty embarrassed with me showing them up like that. It was nice to get back in an organized league when I was eight.

This is when Brett began to get, what some people may say, a bit of an egotistical attitude. At eight, and in the 10-12 year old youth league, he not just beat the older kids, he dominated them, but this time the Carlson’s would not allow coaches to say that Brett could not participate because he was too good. His parents knew that their son had been blessed with an extraordinary talent. It was also at this point, eight years ago, where Newmanistan entered interregional play. They saw the success of the Rockets in the 4th Di Bradini Cup, and looked at their son and smiled. Brett just may have a shot at all, they thought. As for Brett, he looked at that number 20 and told mom, “I wanna be like him!” That number 20 of course, was Jeremy McAllister. Brett made McAllister his hero, trying to emulate the sweet moves that he saw from Jeremy both on the interregional stage, and at home with the Putnam Lake Eagles. Two years later, Carlson attended a match between his local Dover City Mountaineers and the Eagles, and got an autograph and his picture taken with McAllister. Everywhere that Brett went, that picture was with him, as a reminder that he needed to do whatever it took to become as good as him. His schoolwork suffered as he spent time that should have been used for studying practicing his football skills. His parents tried to encourage their son not to forget about the schoolwork, but admittedly it was hard. His father Vinnie reflects, “Once Brett got to be about ten, eleven years old it really seemed inevitable that he could have a successful football career. We knew he wanted to practice, and whether or not he could tell the difference between an acute angle and an obtuse angle really wasn’t our biggest concern. We kept his focus on it to a reasonable level, though.”

For a few years as he got a little older, Carlson sensed that it was inevitable too, that he would have a career as a professional football player as long as he stayed healthy. At 12 years old, he signed up to participate in a local league for 16 and up. Originally laughed at by the older kids, Brett would laugh last when he showed them up too. Then came that day, at 14, when Brian Carson would offer him that Pocono City contract. “It seemed awfully early,” said father Vinnie, “But man, this was Pocono City! Brian Carson! I think we were a little nervous that Brett would be rushing into it, but how in the world do you say no to the Pocono City Capitals! And the money, that was pretty nice too!” Carlson signed and played well for the Capitals. He was in elite company now, and it was obvious that he would have a lot to learn, but he showed an incredible composure regardless, making it seem like just a matter of time that he is an elite player in the NPL.

Now, it is Carlson who comes to Starblaydia. He remembers watching his idol, Jeremy McAllister, lead the team to the Cup here eight years ago in the 4th version. He learned of the legacy of Simeone Di Bradini, though sadly he will never have a chance to meet him. Brett Carlson’s career is just getting started, and he figures to be one of the Rockets top scorers, if not the top scorer, in this tournament. That’s his goal you know, to duplicate the numbers that J-Mac put up right here in Starblaydia. And he’s only 16.

http://www.biezanow.net/~dominik/lzpn1.JPG
The U21 Lovisa Team for 6th Di Bradini Cup

Goalkeeper:
[1] Ole Virge Skoftlund (20, Atma Teatanic)
[12]Marcin Zeerg (17, Gravity Rafaelburg)
[18]Tomasz Jadek (16, Motorola Goar)


Defenders:
[2]Arne Flo-Baekke (19, RCL Atma)
[3] Max Coveygh (17, TFL Ventura Ulfborg)
[7] Bernard Nowak (19, Rancilio Shepenyagah)
[13] Jaroslaw Witek (17, Start Nylanders Sint Vilbeert)
[14] Laurent Blanc (15, LGS Shepenyagah)


Midfielders:
[4] Claude Classen (20, Edda EB Ulborg)
[8] Victor Sainer (20, SD Borland Leve)
[9] Tomasz Malik (19, EDF Atma)
[10] Kristian Sangovor (17, FC Leve)
[15] Mateusz Pajdak (16, RCL Atma)
[16] Markus Zuggler(16, Lovos Atma)

Strikers:
[5] Clas Classen (21, Visby-Nestle Quarcoo)
[6] Sebastian Franke(21, EMC Goar)
[11]Mikka Petalahti (15, Blaupunkt Leve)
[17]Vlad Vladovski (20, EBBC Bosch Atma)


Home & Away Kits
Kits created by:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg
http://www.biezanow.net/~dominik/LovHome4-1.jpghttp://www.biezanow.net/~dominik/LovThird4.jpg

=== In the Secret Bunker ===

Hwang: Boring...

Wang: It's our job...

Hwang: Oh! Looky! The DBC is starting up again!

Wang: Oh $#@%.

Hwang: What's wrong?

Wang: *grumbles*

Hwang: Your grandmother just sat on a cockroach and ate her pantyhose?

Wang: Don't you remember what happened during the last one?

Hwang: No.

Wang: Well, I do. And I don't like it one bit.

Hwang: Ah, come on. It's just one DBC. How bad can the second one be?

Wang: Well?

*** Scenarios running through Wang's head ***

-- Giant crabs chasing them
-- Prostitutes taking over the Han Empire
-- The Singing Beans of C&M become the next Mujeongbu terrorists and start blowing the ^%$& out of C&M
-- The scores for the DBC spontaneously explode and cause a ruckus at the DBC HQ.
-- Zombies start roaming the earth.
-- They become vampires and start sucking blood out of everything.
-- They die
-- Hwang grows into a giant bug and dies

*** End scenarios ***

Wang: Hmmm. That last one ain't too bad.

Hwang: *confused* What last one?

Wang: Okay. The DBC can't be too bad.

Hwang: *still confused* What last one?

*Shin and Shim dressed in Han U21 jerseys*

Shin and Shim: It's DBC!!!!

Wang: Oh great. We're really going to go through this again?

Shin: Why not?

Wang: I was thinking we could watch a documentary or some weird flick.

Shim: That's just boring though. The DBC is so much more interesting.

Shin: As long as we keep Hwang tied up, no one will press any of the buttons anyway.

Wang: Well... that's just the thing. We don't normally press any of the buttons, unless some n00bish country decides to declare war upon us. And usually Hwang presses the right button that erases that reality.

Shin: How does that work?

Hwang: I don't know. I guess I'm just that smart.

Shin: Oh, I just love it when you say that. *oodles Hwang*

Shim: *shivers* I'll never get over that.

Wang: Neither will I, but we're still at a problem that we've got a keyboard that speaks Russian and not a single person who can figure out what it says...

Shim: And nevermind that live-feed camera...

Wang: We never got rid of that?

Shim: I think we got a good solution for that.

Hwang: *giggles* The camera's tickling me!

Shin: That's me!

Hwang: *giggles* I know. And the camera too!

Wang: Oh great...

KNOW YOUR ROCKETS: Matt Sullivan, GK, Hastings Crusaders
#2 of ?? in a series

For every Brett Carlson out there, a kid that stardom seemed as though it would be an inevitability at a young age, there are your Matt Sullivans. Tempted by the allure of goals, and we all know that chicks dig goals, Matt wanted to be a forward. So when he tried out for his first youth football team, there he was. At first his coach thought Matt would be best as a striker, because for his age, he seemed to have a pretty good leg, but that didn’t turn out so well. Then he was moved to midfield, and again, while he was ok, he was beaten on the pitch more often then not, leading his parents to believe that maybe football just wasn’t the right sport for their son.

“Matt told me when he was seven that he never wanted to play football again,” his mother Melissa recalled, “He loved sports, and liked to watch football, but he really didn’t like to play it, and I wasn’t going to force it on him, so we pulled him out of the league, and we looked for other options. The only thing open at the time was a tennis league, so we figured, what the heck.” So Matt, at seven, was handed a tennis racket. He didn’t particularly like this sport either, but his coach caught on to something. “He told me that Matt had great awareness and great reflexes, but needed to work on his serve if he ever wanted to be a good tennis player. He suggested that maybe Matt would be better off playing something where he could use his reflexes to his advantage. I mentioned that he didn’t make it in football and that’s when he asked me what position he was playing,” said his mother. “My tennis coach asked me if I tried goalkeeping,” reflects Matt, “I said no. Being a goalkeeper never crossed my mind. When you’re that young you dream of scoring the big goal, not making the big save. My parents had to talk me into it, because it just didn’t sound exciting to me at the time, and I really didn’t think I would be good at it. Needless to say, I am really glad that they did talk me into it.” At eight years old, Matt was signed back into the league that he had quit the year prior, and the organizers of the league were a little skeptical that he would pull out of the league again, so they made the Sullivan’s pay the entire year’s dues up front and would not permit any refunds. Sullivan was assigned to another team this time, as his previous coach wasn’t too keen on having him back on the team. His new coach, Joe Furlatt, did not hold a grudge, “You have to remember these are kids, and if the kid wants to play, he should play. It’s all about having fun. His parents told me he wanted to see how he would do as a keeper, so we let him practice for it. Those first couple days in practice, everyone out there watching just stood in awe. This kid was amazing.” Good as he may have been, he didn’t necessarily enjoy it. Sure, it was fun during the games stopping everyone’s shots, but it didn’t matter in school where his classmates continuously picked on him for being a keeper, because he was too much of a “wuss” to be something else. It got so bad, that the Sullivan’s moved to another town, about 15 minutes outside of Centralia when Matt was ten. “We saw the talent in our son, and we really thought that he could make a career out of it. But the namecalling was discouraging, so we moved. Here, Matt could play and not have to worry about the other kids who knew he failed at playing other positions. He got better and better, and most importantly, he began to enjoy the game.

Like most kids, Sullivan progressed through youth football, and then started playing for his high school team. This is where the competition got better, and Matt kept stepping up his game to the level he was at. Sure enough, NPL scouts were starting to get him on their radar, including the local Centralia Cougars. When he was 16, he was approached by Centralia coach James Martin. “Mr. Martin told me that Centralia was very interested and they offered me a contract, but it was just to be a backup. I wanted to sign it anyway, but my parents told me to wait a bit and see if another team came along.” Days passed and Centralia was understandingly getting a little antsy. After six days, Mr. Martin made another contact with Sullivan, but not giving him good news. “He told me that the Cougars were retracting the offer because they signed someone else. It was pretty demoralizing.” It was, especially when a couple weeks went by and all he had was D League offer. He was holding onto it as a backup plan, until he got a very unexpected phone call. It was Josh Thompson, the head coach of the Hastings Crusaders. Hastings is a premier league team, but one that consistently falls near the bottom, though good enough not to get relegated. “It was to be the starter in Hastings. Not for as much money as the Centralia was offer, but it excited me more because I could start. I didn’t need to think it over.”

Signing with Hastings meant a 600-mile relocation north for him and his family, but they were glad to make the trip regardless. Donning the red and gold, he put up good numbers for the Crusaders, but their lack of other talent made for a tough year for the team. Then, Sullivan got another call. This one was even more unexpected. “Brian Carson. He asked me if I would play for the Di Bradini Cup team and be the starting goalkeeper. I said yes but I couldn’t believe it. Playing for the Di Bradini team wasn’t really something I thought about because I just didn’t think such an offer would come. I am really excited and can’t wait.” So, there Sullivan will be. In Starblaydia, in goal, for the 6th Di Bradini Cup. I wonder if those eight year olds that made fun of him for wanting to be a goalkeeper growing up will be watching.

Matchday One Scores
a.k.a. Better Late Than Never

Group A
Taeshan 0-2 Starblaydia
Cafundéu 3-1 Kansiov

Group B
Blouman Empire 1-4 Elves Security Forces
Amergianastan 0-3 Candelaria And Marquez

Group C
Newmanistan 2-1 Yafor 2
Krytenia 0-2 Land de Wood

Group D
Lovisa 1-3 Daehanjeiguk
Sorthern Northland 2-2 Jeruselem

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS DEBUT MORE THEN A TEAM IN WIN

Starblaydia- So, we knew that the Rockets would be having a new look roster in this year’s Di Bradini Cup, the third such tournament that the Empire will be participating in. But the names were not the only new things. Out came the Rockets and in the stands were fans waving the sky blue and white, but it was a blue and white that they’ve never seen before. That’s because on the same day as this game took place, the Empire debuted their new flag. No longer will Newmanistan be compared to San Marino. The fans were provided the new flags by Newmanistanian officials, plus some Starblaydi vendors, who were compensated for distributing them to our citizens. Earlier in the day, back in Pocono City, there was a ceremony unveiling the new flag, but here it would fly in a game for the first time. The new flag could not have been any more symbolic of the new Rockets, a group hoping to continue the success that the previous two Di Bradini teams had here in Starblaydia.

On the other side of the pitch were the Golden Wolves of Yafor 2. While Newmanistan started just four players over the age of 18, the Golden Wolves were a veteran group at this level, with eight of their eleven starters being 20 or 21. But there was no intimidation over the age factor. Though perhaps, there was some overanxiousness as the Rockets seemed to struggle early to get in a real good flow to their game. They’ve practiced and trained quite a bit over the last few days, but you could clearly see that it was a group needing a little of game action to where they would be truly comfortable with one another. Yafor 2 tried to capitalize on this, and for the first portions of the game, they controlled the possession, including five shots on target in the games first twenty minutes. However, Matt Sullivan was there each time as he got a good look at each shot, and their was a Rocket defender in the face of the shooter more often then not. As the first half began to move along, you could see Newmanistan getting in a better groove, and the momentum turned around the half hour mark. Dirk Brogan and James Seidler were taking control of the match in midfield. After watching his idol Brett Prescott manhandle the Yafor 2 senior team in the Oxen Cup, Seidler tried to duplicate the same thing in the Di Bradini Cup, though unlike Prescott, he got caught and smacked with a yellow in the 35th minute for a rough tackle on Amario Otavais. Otavais then delivered a beautiful free kick up field to set up the games opening goal off the foot of Jamie Durand to make it one-nil. This is where the game was at the break.

It was a frustrating goal to allow as far as Brian Carson was concerned, because it came right when the Rockets seemed to be gaining momentum and control of the match. One mistake led to a one-nil deficit. The jitters seemed to be escaping the team, though, and confidence soon filled the locker room. They would get it back they declared, and Carson was very confident that they could. Still, they had to execute in the back as well, to not make it a bigger hole. He preached going on a cautious attack to start, and then if necessary, going all out later on.

James Seidler did not like how things went the first time he took a run at Otavais. This time, the referee could not see him do the same thing again. He had the card, but he was not scared of a second yellow. Sure enough he took the run at him again, and viciously brought him down. Why? Who knows. James just thought Otavais made him look bad before and he wasn’t going to have it again. The Yafor 2 sideline waited for the referee to pull out the card. They waited, and waited. But the referee could only see Otavais on the ground, and did not know how it happened. He lectured Seidler on suspicion, but since he did not see it, he did not issue a card. Otavais, who was not injured, was furious, and so were the rest of the Golden Wolves. Seidler smirked. He was in their head. Just like his idol, Brett Prescott would have done. Not too long after, with the Yafor 2 fans in the stands still cursing out the officials, Newmanistan was on the attack. Dirk Brogan led the play before connecting a pass to another Brett. Carlson, of course. Brett retrieved the pass, and made some of his highlight reel moves to split the defenders before firing the shot in the top right corner. Just like his idol, Jeremy McAllister. The goal was in the 52nd minute, and we were tied up. If the Yafor 2 fans were mad before, they were pissed now. Newmanistan stayed on the attack, sensing it, and in the 59th minute, they struck again. Carlson again, taking a pass from Kyle Carrigan, moved in on goal, and made Divanlir commit with a nice shot fake, then slid a pass over to Jennifer Vilardi. Nothing but the back of the net. 2-1 Rockets, and they were on their way. Amario Otavais had pride to play for as well. That punk Seidler would not get away with it, so in the 67th minute, he took a run at Seidler. Payback complete. But the ref saw it, and out came a yellow card. At first, it looked like the referee was going to pull out a red, then thought better of it, perhaps realizing that he still needed to drive back to the hotel in traffic with the Yafor 2 fans. As the game moved past the 75th minute, the Rockets focused more and more on defense, and the Golden Wolves could not get much of a threat going. Eventually, the final whistle sounded. Newmanistan had won, 2-1.

The Rockets will next play another team who wears sky blue and white with pride as they meet up with Krytenia. According to the pre-Cup rankings, Krytenia is expected to be the biggest threat to the Rockets, but many now feel that team is going to be Land de Wood, who were impressive in their win over the Krytenians. Newmanistan is on top of the table after the first matchday, but much more work will need to be done in order to stay there.

Want some post-game reaction? Here it is!

Carson: “I was proud of the way we adjusted today. Some of the jitters were natural early on, but we overcame them, and played a very good football game. The Golden Wolves were a formidable opponent to play right out of the gate, but we did a good job against them, and we should be proud of our performance.”

Sullivan: “Outside of the one they got by me, I thought I had a good look at everything they put on net. You really have to credit the defense. They did a good job. I wish I could have had the clean sheet, but we got a win and that’s what matters.”

Talcott: “We didn’t start that great, and there are certainly something things that we must improve on if we are going to win the Cup, but I think it is in our ability to do so.”

Seidler: “It was about sending a message that these other countries need to learn who James Seidler is, because I don’t play nice. He didn’t do anything wrong, but it really pissed me off when Otavais set up a goal with his free kick after I got carded. So I wanted to congratulate him in my own special way.”

Carlson: “There are some things we need to iron out. We played good enough to win this game, but I think we need to play a little better to win the Cup. Getting this game under our belt will help though, we can move forward from here.”

Dank Rozky was getting hassled by Jay Licken

Jay: It's Dazza!
Dank: Jay, we have nothing in common apart from the same hair colour.
Jay: I know, but I hope you're not related.
Dank: Dazza is not redhead, she's actually a brunette anyway. I am a real redhead.

Jay: I know. Still! You have same hair colour.
Dank: Why you'd hassle someone else instead.
Jay: Taw is hiding somewhere.
Dank: I have no idea why you're on this team.

Jay: Because I score a lot of goals.
Dank: And girls ...
Jay: Jealous then?
Dank: No, you end up with the wrong type of girl. You get the whores.

Jay: So, are we ready for this U21 cup thing?
Dank: To be honest, I'm not ready at all. This big time stuff is all new.
Jay: And most of our fans will actually be girls.
Dank: Yes, it's a bit daunting. You don't look daunted.

Jay: I'm a striker, I'm the man who gets the headlines. I like the cameras.
Dank: Attention whore strikers.
Jay: Hey, look the fans are here.
Dank: You can spot them from a mile away. Behave yourself Jay, we are here to work not play.

Jay: There are pretty dedicated. They follow any Jeruselem team around.
Dank: I think we should have more normal fans.
Jay: I like our fans as they are.
Dank: Admitted they don't sacrifice rubber chickens in public or start wars.

Girl: Can we have some autographs?
Jay: Sure! Dank here doesn't like all this attention.
Girl: Say, he's got hair like Dazza! Just like my hair, so cool!
Dank: I really need a haircut ...

The Islands of Qutar


Not all of them, obviously, just one stadium on one of ‘em


Years ago…


Kinda


Jos Cornelisse is a left winger, famed for his stepovers, who had played youth football for Khatib FC, his boyhood team, before being snapped up for Turks’ Club, but he didn’t get all that many games because he was seen as unreliable. Now aged twenty-seven, he plays for São José, in faraway Cafundéu.

His cross… comes to Ben Head, a holding midfield player who was called up to the C&M squad despite never having played top-flight football. It has quickly proven one of Mark Baker’s astutest… is that a word?… most astute moves, and his Green Island team, (who are just a bunch of inbred nazis, honestly, spirit of tolerance my arse, sometimes I wonder why we came here, Hanaa, I really do, what future is there for the boys, eh, I mean really?; Najib, for shame!, do not speak like that in front of the children!) have gone from strength to strength. Head has been talked of as a future C&M captain, though his personal life has come into question, though mummy says don’t be stupid, Abdul, people don’t do that sort of thing with horses any more.

He nods it down… to José Felipe Cassumba Domingos, who is a versatile midfielder who plays for Marquez-Onwere and is so young that he could still be playing for the under-21s. He comes from the same small largely Hispanic village as Ignacio Vélez in Marquez, which is the island next door to ours and is only about sixty per cent Hispanic, despite what their extremists say, don’t listed to them, because once you’ve got extreme views, extreme actions are bound to follow, d’you hear me, Abdul?, don’t get yourself involved in any of that, for Allah’s sake, please, concentrate on your cricket instead, yes?, you like cricket.

He… scored. Beautifully. Kim Yongdae, the Clube Imperial goalkeeper, didn’t stand a chance.

The half of the crowd which wasn’t yellow in hue jumped to their feet as the C&M equaliser went in, but the ten year-old in the lilac Radyukevich shirt stayed seated, concentrating on the spot on the pitch now vacated by Cassumba Domingos, replaying the goal over and over in his mind’s eye. It was, he knew, what they called an ‘impossible angle’, which was clearly ridiculous, because he’d quite obviously scored. This presumably meant that nothing was impossible, not really.

It was a thought that would serve Abdul well in later life. He was a curious child, in various senses of the word, though he might well have suddenly become a lot less curious from this point forth, had not a voice over his right shoulder, in a clear but authoritative manner, said “Duck.”

Abdul did as he was told and crouched downwards, and followed the path of a mallard as it ploughed into the face of a man in the seat directly behind his at one hundred and thirty miles an hour, knocking him stone dead.

An inevitable panic followed, as a circle of two dozen people reluctantly dragged their eyes away from the Cup of Harmony game momentarily, to take note of their stricken countryman. While his mother and father and brother and sister busied themselves with trying not to be in a position where they’d be forced to help, Abdul stared up at a figure all in black that he could have sworn he hadn’t seen seated there before.

And figures all in black were unusual. Even in Khatib-Gassett, or Albrecht, where they went in for that kind of thing a bit more. Up in Clotaire, Abdul’s mother and sister and female cousins generally wore ordinary clothes, or at least something a tad more flattering to the figure, and with a flower print. And this one might not even have been a woman. It was impossible to tell.

It beckoned to him. He leant in.

“This is the Daehanjeiguk game at the twenty-ninth Cup of Harmony, isn’t it?”

“Er. Yes,” Abdul whispered back, over the hubbub.

“Good. One moment.” The figure froze for an instant, and then started breathing again. “Now remember, next time you see me?”

“Yes…?”

“Um. No. That wasn’t a question.”

And then it wasn’t there any more.


***

El din, Marquez


The Present Day


At the time of writing, anyway. It won’t be the present day, tomorrow


Well it will, obviously, but not this particular present day


It’ll be yesterday


“And I’m sorry, tell me again… Who told you?”

Jack sighed. “The beans, sir.”

“The beans? Talking beans?”

“Singing beans, sir.”

“I’m well aware of the singing beans, Jack. Everyone’s aware of the singing beans. But these ones told you, told you, that they were planning to, and I quote, ‘petition the CMSC, sic, to allow some of their star players to participate in the Di Bradini Cup’?”

“Yes, sir.”

“And they also told you, and again, this is from your article, Jack, that they are considering a major political move to unite with the Marquezian minority, sic, and form a united front against discrimination’?”

“Yes, sir. Although, it’s not all of them, sir. There are dissidents who favour a more softly-softly approach.”

“And the signing beans told you this, Jack?”

“Yes, sir. Through the medium of song.”

“It’s a funny thing, Jack, but up until now all the beans have ever told anyone else is that the wheels on the bike go round and round, Jack. Or that the bars on the bike steer side to side.”

“Yes, sir. That’s very important to them, sir. It’s their political anthem.”

“Not exactly ‘keep the red flag flying’, is it, Jack?”

“It depends how you look at it, I think. It’s all in the nuances.”

“Right. So, these are clever beans, yes? Beans from the far future? Is there magic in the beans, Jack? So to speak.”

“Um… They have their own creation myth, sir.”

“Oh?”

“It involves bikes a lot.”

The editor of the El din Daily Gazette, the city’s largest English language newspaper, put his hand to his forehead. “Jack, I’m not printing this… You need help, son, you really do.”

“I can assure you, I’m in perfect mental health, sir.”

“Well… Go and work on the sports desk for a bit, then.”

“I’m an investigative reporter, sir!”

“Then do an investigative report, Jack! Just… not about the beans.”

“I’ll… I’ll see what I can do, sir.”

“Good-o.”

The editor watched him leave, before picking up the phone.

“Hello? Yes, can you put me through to Mr. Melbourne, please? There’s someone I need to talk to him about.”

He waited for a while without a reply, cursed quietly, and then remembered to dial.

***

Tabeck, Starblaydia


Nowish


Ryan Fattori was twenty-one and, like his opposite number on the right flank, had already played in a Champions’ Cup final, although he hadn’t scored in it and didn’t have a winner’s medal. He was Albrecht born and bred, Downward Marsh, to be precise, one of those anonymous little districts that Albrecht FC found most of their kids from these days. He’d been at their youth academy since he was six. He had a surprisingly good voice, when he was slightly tipsy, fainted at the sight of blood, and had a girlfriend called Emily, although no-one was supposed to know that, since she wasn’t actually old enough yet.

His pass… came to Tom Smith, who was also twenty-one and came from the west of Green Island. His dad worked on the trawlers, his mum designed decorative soaps. Tom himself had grown up a lot since moving to Arrigo Portuguese, and worshipped his manager, the Kura-Pellandi Matthew Tortini, to a slightly worrying degree. He liked eggs, but only hard-boiled, and was a demon at billiards. A striker, big and muscular, but not the most intelligent player, not yet.

His knock-down… came to Abdul Ibadulla, who was eighteen, and came from Clotaire, and was himself.

He… trapped the ball under his feet. The Ameriganastan right-back grinned at him. “you might as well give up now.youre never going to score,kid,” the defender whispered in Abdul’s ear. Several of his colleagues sniggered.

This was so frustrating. Abdul prided himself on knowing both his team-mates and the opposition players inside and out, and had done ever since he’d first got onto Radyukevich CSC’s books. It was his Thing, it was what he did. His team-mates valued having a big man to target, even if the big man was still just a teenager and not altogether sure of where his feet were at any given moment, just yet. But more than that, his knowledge could always be relied upon to get them out of a fix, whether they were up against Albrecht Turkish or the Scruggs Picking Sharks under-19s.

But he was quickly learning that international football was a different beast. Who the arse were Ameriganastan? They were a warlike lot, he knew, who were keen on public hangings; but as for their football players? They had names on their backs, but from the front they all looked identical. Trevor Organ, the manager, had bandied the word ‘clones’ about darkly, before the game, and you could see why. It was like when he’d played against Kevin and Tom Ely, back when they were both in the C.A.L. youth team. Except times by five and a half.

There was twenty minutes left to go, and C&M were goalless against these utter nobodies, and Abdul simply had no idea what he was supposed to do about it. He could see James Falconer and Ella Sodje warming up on the sidelines, and maybe that was for the best. He didn’t know much about them either, since they played overseas, but perhaps they’d have an answer to the Ameriganastani defence, perha–

In the crowd, a black figure. And for the first time in eight years, he remembered. And he stopped, and stared.

A flighted ball from George Jones bounced off Abdul’s head, and deflected into the net.

Organ motioned for Falconer and Sodje to sit back down, as Abdul found himself under a pile of Candelariasian bodies. He struggled, desperate to find a chink of light between Niv Cohen’s thighs, but unfortunately the A.Turks player’s parents hadn’t been especially devout. By the time the hordes had parted and he could look up into the stands again, the figure had gone.

Abdul shook his head as he wandered back to the half-way line, forgot all about it, and spent the rest of the game finishing off his hat-trick.

Life in a strange country like the ESF is difficult for most foriegners to adapt to. What with the government taking all of your income, but in turn providing for all your needs. Where the majority of the population works for the government in some way, and the entire populace is madly devoted to football. It's all a very unique and odd to most foriengers, but when that foriegner is a seventeen year old from the crazy commercialist state of Cafundeu, it feels like he is on another planet. The contrast in the philosophies of each nation makes life quite confusing, espicially to a youth. When you are used to a country where the individual and corporate gain are what drives the country, but then find yourself in a country where the collective good is put ahead of everything else, it's natural to feel slightly lost. Luckily for Ricardinho, he shares a passion for football, and routinely was playing with the other kids in the parks of Hondo.

It was during one of these matches that a scout from the Owls just happen to spot Ricardinho out their on the wing, dribbling around and through a handful of defenders before making that deft little touch to free his teammate for a open net goal. The scout had merely been going to collect a borrowed video from a mate of his, but his breath was taken away by the silky play of the youngster. However, when he approached his manager about getting a spot on the youth team for the Cafundeu-born lad, he refused. Luckily, for Ricardinho, the scout had been the roommate of Orophin Anárion when they are at uni together. So when he heard of Anárion's appointment to the U-21 manager position, he was able to get a spot on the roster for this amazing youngster.

Ricardinho was initially hesistant to take the spot on the team, as he still had aspitations for playing for his home country. However when he tried contacting their manager, he was once again turned down, and reluctantly took his spot on the Valanora roster, albiet as a reserve. Yet when Hardanal had to come out in the twenty-first minute, it was his chance. The Vanorians were down one to nil, but still with seventy minutes to play, what better chance for the youngster to prove everyone who doubted him wrong. So off came the Hardanal, and on came all six foot three, black haired, green eyed silky winger with a desire to put a stop of being constantly refused. Three assists, a goal, and a man of the match later, and one has to think that the youngster will have plenty of clubs bickering for his services. Never mind the fact that Anwamanë and Celebrindal both had to do some work for those three goals, with Anwamanë getting the brace, but it was clearly Ricardinho that lead the squad to victory.

THE FOOTBALL DIARY
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NEFASTO STARTS WELL IN THE DBC

The CCFM, wanting good results this time with the Sub-21 National Team, hired David Nefasto as coach. The experienced coach has the mission of making a good campaign in this Di Bradini Cup. For this, first of all the team needs to get qualified in the group stage, and had a good start, with an easy victory in the game against Kansiov. Once again counting with a good midfield (the best sector in most Cafundelense teams), the team showed talent and seems very promising.

In the game against Kansiov, the team attacked well, but had to overcome the opponent's defence, which was well-built. This wasn't a problem for the Monopolists. With good offensive moves, Serrano found a breach in Kansiov's defence, and made a magnificent pass to Alves, who could dribble the goalkeeper and shoot to score the goal. Cafundéu's early advantage deceived the players, who though that the game was going to be easy. A mistake. Kansiov held the Monopolists, and scored in the end of the first half with their lonely attacker Stalin.

In the second half, it was necessary for Nefasto to make the team work better and score the goals to get the victory. The team was playing better than its opponent, and the draw didn't seem the fair result. And the players worked well to bring the win to Cafundéu. Serrano scored the second goal of the Monopolists, after exchanging passes with Pedrinho. Later, Ivan made an excellent crossing to Alves, who headed the ball to the goal, deciding the game in the favour of Cafundéu.

CAFUNDÉU 3x1 KANSIOV

Referee: Erman Shablik (Sorthern Northland).
MOTM: Kauã Serrano (Cafundéu).

CAFUNDÉU: Peru; Rogério, Ivan, Japa and Nunes; Fabinho (Pedrinho 80'), Serrano and Ilmari (Marques 68'); Matoso, Nando (Pedrinho 45') and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

KANSIOV: Fedotov; Grigoriev, Panin, Kozlov and Leontyev; Valentin (Pyotr 65'), Miroslav, Petia, Ilari (Varlaam 55') and Benedikt (Andrey 80'); Stalin.
Coach: Bogdan Alexi.

Goals:CAF: Alves 8'/88' , Serrano 66'.
KAN: Stalin 44'.

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Cafundéu – formation for the game against Taeshan: Peru; Rogério, Ivan, Nunes and William; Fabinho, Serrano and Ilmari; Matoso, Sérgio Guará and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

Match’s Referee: Dorivan Miccazi (Land de Wood).

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DBC Goalscorers:

2- Alves
1- Serrano

Well we've just torn up the paper we released earlier as we completely missed the scores communique. The intern responsible for checking this has now been sacked, the line up he received was obviously meant for our next game. (must be Dancougar's sports centre's influence [see the Oxen Cup report for that])

So after our first team struggled a bit in the Oxen Cup how would our u-21's fair in their debut. Their first match was up against Krytenia.

Our team started brightly Woodrow Wilson making some good runs down the left, but the finishing was poor. But then in the 25th minute Tom Darkless broke down the right and crossed it in for David Bomber to head home. 1-0 and things going well. Play continued throughout the 1st half with Garnet Aigner making some good runs and Charlot Avakian defending well, but no more goals and the 1st half ended 1-0.

So into the 2nd half, and Land de Wood continue to dominate, with Woodrow Wilson outstanding down the left, and another good cross, David Bomber knocks it down and John Little scores. 2-0. Try as they might Kryenia can't find a way back into this game as Land de Wood shut up shop and defend well for the rest of the game.

Final score 2-0 and the manager is so pleased with that result that he actually throws away the planned team sheet for the next game and announces he is keeping the same line up!


Krytenia 0-2 Land de Wood

Group D
Jeruselem
Sorthern Northland
Lovisa (3-1)

Shin & Shim & Hwang: GOOO...OOOAL!!!

Wang: *cleans ear* Oh great. 3 goals. If there's another goal this game, I'll just go deaf, I'd imagine...

Shim: What are you talking about? The game is over! 3-1 for the Han!

Hwang: Can I step down now? The game's over!

Shin & Shim: No!

Hwang: Eh, can I have some popcorn?

Wang: No! That's got to last until the DBC Final!

Shin: Really? *chomping on popcorn* That's funny because this is the last bag of popcorn.

Wang & Hwang: What?!?

Shim: Shin and I didn't find much popcorn to start with. We thought you guys ate it all up.

SUPER: Say, do we have more popcorn? *chomping on popcorn* I think we're out. *leaves*

Wang: I... will... kill...

Shim: Easy. It's just popcorn.

Hwang: It's Hwang to the rescue! *flies off the hook over the camera and presses a button*

Wang: What the %$#^? You're not supposed to be able to do that!

=== Candelaria And Marquez ===

Bean#1: Holy %$#^! There's a bunch of masquerading pistachio nuts!

Bean#2: ¿Qué?

Bean#1: I said! ¡%$#^ santo! ¡Hay muchos pistachos de disfraz!

Bean#2: ¡Ah! ¿Qué bueno?

=== The Secret Lair ===

Shin: Masquerading Pistachios? What is this, a "let's make up some new sentient beings for the parade" machine?

Hwang: But it's succeeded in its original intent!

Shim: Which is?

Hwang: Make Wang not so angry at the Supervisor for eating all of the bags of popcorn.

Shin & Shim: Ah, right.

Wang: *choking Hwang* What is your problem?!?!?

SUPER: *crunching on popcorn* I've just gotten a call from Office of Paranormal Activities. A bunch of pistachios wearing masks suddenly appeared in Candelaria And Marquez. Anyone press the buttons?

Wang: *pointing at Hwang* YOU STOLE OUR %^$&ING POPCORN!

SUPER: *nods* Good to see we're on task again. Hwang, you need to stop pressing those %$#^ buttons. *exits*

Shin: At least they're not singing beans...

Shim: At least they're not singing...

Hwang: At least they speak Bensroomese!

Wang: That's not much consolation, Hwang...

Hwang: At least you're not on my neck...

(Team gathers in the hotel meeting room. Major domestic news has hit the Empire this evening. Background tidbit: Newmanistan has gone to war with a nation in the region.)

Carlson: Coach I’m concerned....

LaFave: Me too....

Several others: Yeah... us too....

Carson: I know. I’ve heard the news too, but we must focus on football. We have come here to represent the Empire, and us doing well here can serve as a good thing for our people back home.

Talcott: No Empress visits to Starblaydia this Di Bradini Cup, I can’t believe the Empire is going to War.

J Vilardi: What if something happens to our families while we’re here?

Carson: I don’t have the answer for that. But I have confidence in the Newmanistanian Armed Forces. Anyway, it looks like something that will resolve itself quickly. I can’t promise anything, but we can play for our country, and give our fans something to be excited about in a time of need.

Seidler: You guys need to relax. You hear the word war and everyone freaks out. It’ll be over with before we get back, and the disputed territory is off the coast. Nothing’s going to happen in the mainland.

LaFave: You’re probably right.

Talcott: Exactly, now let’s focus on Krytenia. Another sky blue and white country.

Carlson: It’s going to be annoying if their fans and the Starblaydi fans have any ill feelings over the situation that happened there while we’re in a new conflict of our own.

Carson: Maybe, but we can shut them up quickly if we take the lead and don’t look back. This is a pivotal game for us. We win, we’re likely going to advance. I believe that we should beat these guys.

J Vilardi: You all beat them eight years ago in the 4th Di Bradini Cup.

Carson: Yeah, that was a big game for us. Back at home our fans need to say us win. For so often we have made “For Newmanistan!” a true battle cry of ours. Now, that cry means so much more. Now, our people want to see us win.

Seidler: I agree with you coach, that we want to win, and we need to win for us and for the Empire. I will give you my best and I know my teammates will do the same. But this war, really, isn’t something to worry about at all. It’ll be all said and done quickly. We are the more powerful nation.

LaFave: I know, it’s just the thought of it.

Carlson: But probably no Empress to Starblaydia for this Cup.

Carson: No, I’m afraid not. But we can do just fine without there. Let’s go show Krytenia who the better sky blue and white nation is!

Night, Starblaydia, Yaforite Training Facilities

Jagor Aiza swung his fist forward, feeling it smack against the wooden door in front of him. He was a well-built man, clearly defined muscles running down his arms, broad shoulders, a firm base. He was a good-looking man, as well, with his well-combed hair parted in such a way that his face was not obscured. It was no surprise, either. Jagor Aiza was the heir to the Aiza empire, the vast factory of automobiles, manufacturing, factories, employment, and production that made up the third-largest company in the Grand Democratic Duchy, as well as the largest company in its sector. Aiza was worth billions, and, from the point of view of someone looking at his exterior, Aiza had made good use of those billions. After all, he did seem like a man who prided himself on his appearance (though, as any good man knows, looks can be deceiving).

Aiza softly muttered something beneath his breath, and then swung his fist again, feeling the hollow "thwack" as his fist met the door once more. A soft ringing swirled through the air, and Jagor Aiza lowered his fist, reaching into the recesses of his coat, looking for something - clearly a cellphone. The door creaked open (to reveal the face of a stunningly beautiful girl, who seemed that way even at first glance) and Aiza entered, without even a sidelong glance at the girl, still rooting around in his coat for the cellphone. "Sit down Mr. Aiza." came the deep voice from the other side of the room, and Jagor Aiza unconsciously obeyed, feeling his way down onto the chair and removing his jacket in the same fluid motion, still hunting for that elusive cellphone. The rings, naturally, continued.

Seconds later, Aiza had found what he was looking for, and was speaking quickly and softly to whoever was on the ling next to him. "I don't care for excuses, Dr. Varenias. Excuses are not on my list of appreciated things, I hope you understand that. I don't care that there's only a niche market for high-performance sports utility vehicles in Damirez, do you understand? I want the Catch to succeed at what it is doing, okay? Lower the price if you have to - wait, what? Next time you need to ask, you understand me? ASK. I'm your boss, I can fire you. Guess what, I think I'm going to do that. You're bloody-well fired, is that clear? Oh, now you're giving me assurances that you'll sell everything I want? Why don't you do it without the threat next time, okay? Yes, they'll be a next time. Now get out and start selling before I have to - okay, good. That's a little bit better." Aiza's tone of voice would have worked well for an example for young orchestras as to a good version of a crescendo, though Aiza clearly had not had that in mind.

Slamming his phone down, Jagor Aiza rather easily continued his extreme anger (an emotion that seemed to play remarkably well on his face) as he stared at the man (and beautiful girl) directly in front of him. "Look, Isilvarnon, I think I made myself remarkably clear when I loaned you what I did. You would owe me and you would pay me back. Well, guess what? Your team bloody-well losing, that's what. You can't make money club-wise, but you promise me that the U21 team can get you that cash back, right? Well you better decide what exactly you can pay back, because I need that money, you understand?" It was remarkable how similar Jagor Aiza's tone was to how it had been but five minutes before, even though it had been a conversation of entirely different proportions. "Yes. That's a good thing. Now you won't enchant me with your daughter, nor interest me with tickets - I can get my own women and my own tickets to sporting events. Nice try, though. She's a pretty girl, that's for sure."

The man across the table glared right back at Jagor Aiza. It was clear just how much hatred he had for the multi-billionaire locked up inside himself. It was very, very clear, and from the very expression on Jagor Aiza's at the very time, he did not care at all what the man across the table from him thought about him. Jagor Aiza would have struck the ordinary man as simply one of those who did not care what others thought about him. In such a case, the ordinary man would have been correct - Jagor Aiza had a reputation for such blatant disregard for public opinion that he had forced opponents to stop selling, that he had used underhand tactics as a regular thing. The antics of Jagor Aiza, however, had never quite been a problem for the Aiza brand overall - after all, Jagor Aiza was simply one man, and his company was made up of more than simply one man.

Jagor Aiza, thus, didn't pay much mind to the antics of the man across the table from him. This only seemed to serve as an intensifier for the anger of the man across the table from him - it was clear as to why. Jagor Aiza had, in a purely Yaforite fashion, turned a compliment into an insult, with a simple flick of his tongue and slight inflection. First of all, he had blatantly called her a gift, which would indicate things along other lines, which was a pure insult to her. It was clear that her father could not take such an insult lightly. His own internal struggle was echoed on his face, as pure rage subsided, to be replaced with the knowledge of who, and what, he was dealing with, which then moved towards disgust at the actions of the man he was dealing with, and then to the blank face of someone who is working very hard to not reveal his own emotions and, as he tries so hard, essentially reveals them nonetheless.

"I didn't bring my daughter out of any hope of...enticing...you, Mr. Aiza. I would never do that to her. I brought her because she says that she has a proposition for you. A very good proposition, I believe." From the expression on Jagor Aiza's face, he had no interest in her proposition, but, like any man with money and time, Aiza listened nonetheless - with the usual protests that he had no possible amount of time to waste on "nonsense". "She may speak, though. I don't really care. It doesn't make a difference to me." he finished. Nonetheless, when Radria Moraedenshar began to speak, even Jagor Aiza was astounded by what she was telling him. And the more Jagor Aiza heard, the more Jagor Aiza was interested. And the more Jagor Aiza was interested, the more excited he became. Once she had finished, the head of the multi-billion-mulc Aiza automobile empire stared hungrily and responded in a similar way. "Do it if you can. But I'm giving you until the end of this tournament to find the money you owe me. And, if you don't have it then, then everything you gave me as collateral stays mine."

"That includes the team." With that, Jagor Aiza grabbed his coat and left the building, leaving two very broken souls in his wake.

THE ROCKET REPORT

IN SHADOW OF DISPUTE; A TEAM YEARNS TO RISE

Starblaydia- While the mind of the Newmanistanian populace have been forced to focus on a regional dispute, a team of young footballers wishes to make a name for themselves. I (journalist Clint Peterson) arrived in Starblaydia at the same time as the young Rockets, excited about covering my third Di Bradini Cup. The only questions on my mind were could the Rockets make their third consecutive final, and if they did, perhaps win in the final. I was also excited about coming to Starblaydia again, to see how this great nation had honored their most recent World Cup champions, and their AOCAF champions, knowing how passionate the Starbladyi citizens are over their sports teams. After the group draw was announced, the only thing I thought I needed to think about when hearing the word “dispute” would be if there may be any residual effects from the Krytenia/West Starblaydia ordeal that our next opponent had to deal with.

They say its not a big deal. That it will probably be over with before we get back. But being so far away from home, how can you help but be nervous that things might be dramatically different when you return. The dispute is not on the mainland of Newmanistan, and is more of offshore conflict involving oil drilling. Ahhh yes, wars over oil. When will they ever stop? I am assured that when I return home that everything will be alright as the two nations involved do not seem interested in destroying the other nation and killing innocent civilians. I breath deeper, as I want to believe that it will all work out. Newmanistan has a respectfully strong army and navy, and this will probably be more of a naval. We have the backing of the two greatest military powers in the region behind us. Winning the war, seems like a bit of a slam dunk. But all it takes is for that one casualty on your end to be someone you care deeply for, and it certainly won’t feel like a successful venture. Trying to get news out of my Starblaydi hotel room over the conflict is difficult. It simply isn’t an issue in this part of the world. The internet? Sure, I can get news off of there. But you can’t believe everything you read on the net. Except for the Rocket Report. That, you can trust.

I am a grown man, I have lived through wars before. In reality, this conflict doesn’t seem as though it will be as great as other ones we have experienced. But how are a group of kids going to fare, playing in an interregional football tournament knowing that this same stuff is going on? I caught up with Brian Carson, and got an interview out of him. We tried to work our way to football, eventually. Here it is:

CP: I am honored to be joined this morning by our head coach Brian Carson. Brian, how are you today?

BC: I’m doing well. And you?

CP: As well as I can, it’s tough though, you know.

BC: I know, but I really am trying to approach it with a positive attitude.

CP: Is it tough when the kids ask you for advice and to be their father figure, so to be speak, in this conflict when you, yourself, don’t know exactly how things are going at home?

BC: It’s not easy, because I don’t have the definitive answers. I cannot tell them with certainty that everything will be fine when they get home. But I can give them advice and guidance. You and I have been lived through a couple of conflicts, and I think we both know, deep down, that this is not really a big deal and probably will be done before we get back.

CP: What is the mood of the team concerning the conflict?

BC: It’s mixed. Some are more worried then others.

CP: How’s the focus on football?

BC: It’s been pretty good, we had a good training session this morning, and I think we’ll be just fine. We have additional motivation now, to do it for our home fans. To give them something to cheer about, especially over the next few days.

CP: That’s a good thing.

BC: Of course it is. You have to understand that Newmanistan right now treats the Di Bradini Cup the way that nations like Valanora, SLANI, Milchama, and Starblaydia treat the world cup. This is where our legacy is building. The World Cup is a long ways away, and while we believe that there will be a day in which we attain it, the Di Bradini Cup is a reality every time we come here.

CP: And it shows that the future of Newmanistan football continues to develop great young talent.

BC: We do. Football in Newmanistan has taken off since we first came to Starblaydia for this very tournament eight years ago. It was always among the best sports in the nation, but never at the top of the list. Now, it’s right there at the top with racing.


CP: Racing will never be topped, huh?

BC: Nah, I don’t think so, but that’s fine.

CP: You are coming off a win over Yafor 2. What was your opinion of the match?

BC: It was a solid performance. The Golden Wolves have a good team, and they gave us a pretty good fight. I liked the way that we asserted control of the match though in the second half. Not just because we took the lead and stayed in front, but it took some character to do that. We also did a good job of maintaining our composure.

CP: Even James Seidler?

BC: Yeah well, that’s what he’s here for.

CP: To be another Brett Prescott. How do you think he compares to Brett, overall?

BC: He’s got it in him for sure. We don’t want to be considered a dirty team, and I don’t think that we are. Though at the same time, I think everyone needs a player like James that always has the opposing team wondering where on the pitch he is. When they start worrying about that, it can take them off their game. Prescott does a great job against the top scorers of the other team, and Seidler did a great job of that against Yafor 2.

CP: He nearly got their captain red carded.

BC: That he did, and probably, the red should have came out. But that shows what James will bring to the team.

CP: Against Krytenia, how would you assess the teams chances?

BC: I like them. We’re doing a lot of things right, so I am very confident right now.

CP: Ok Brian, I should probably be letting you be going now. So take care, and I’ll see you next time.

BC: Thanks, Clint.

For some time now, the men had been in a long tunnel to what seemed like nowhere. There were four of them, a mix of sizes and the tunnel needed to be big enough to accommodate all of them.

"Why'd you come along Malachy yer fat bastard? We'd have done this tunnel in half the time if we didn't have to make it wide enough for yer arse."

The man named Malachy seemingly not in the mood to discuss the point raised just grunted. The one seemingly against Malachy's being there seemed to have got the message and carried on with digging out a tunnel whilst occasionally muttering discontently to himself.

--Some hours later--

"Allreet, we've bon diggong for a whele now, we'll stoop here for ze night to rest, and zen in ze morning, we shall makke ot across ze border and our plans vill come togethor." whispered a member of the group who seemed to be leader.

In their cramped, tiny oven-like space the four got out a gas stove, some ingredients and a bunch of cooking utensils.

"Tomato soup tonight then", Malachy commented as he set about organising the meal.

"Honestly boss, why did we bring this fat bastard along? When we've done this we'll need to be out of there fast, and with him, he'll only be slowing us down." enquired the man who earlier had questioned why Malachy was there.

The leader considered this for a moment, and then looked up. He spoke once again in a heavy accent.

"Lorcan, my goodt man, do you know how to plant ze explosives?"

"No, I don't."

"Vell, neither does I or the other member of ze party. Malachy though, he know zhow. Zat is vhy ve hafe him. Vith him vith us we vill make sure ze fireworks at zis tournament will go off in a spectacular bang. Now zen ze food is ready, quiet! We must eat, and zen rest. For tomorrow ve have a lot of hard vork to once agin."

KNOW YOUR ROCKETS: Scott LaFave, CB, Daytopia Racers & Brett Taratino, CB, South Tier Seagulls
#3 of ?? in a series

Growing up in a small town outside of Tundra Falls, Scott LaFave knew that he would be a professional athlete one day. He just didn’t know that it would be football. LaFave, who was a very tall kid, and has remained that way as he has gotten older was placed on the basketball courts by his parents. In their mind, their son was going to be a superstar basketball player. You see, it was their ticket to the good life, trying to use their son as their retirement plan. Scott had no choice in the matter.

When he was a mere five years old, his mother Ellen put him in a basketball league for the 7-9 year old age bracket because in her opinion then, Scott would benefit the most from playing against older kids. While that theory, in principle, may be true, it didn’t seem fair. Scott didn’t even know that he liked basketball, he was just told that he would. Though he did his best in the league, it became evident to his parents that he needed to be more then bigger then the other kids in order to have a chance. At six, Scott was forced to practice shooting for two hours every day after he got home from school, and if he ever expressed interest in another sport, he was promptly discouraged of it. Scott liked to watch football, and if he could sneak it without his parents looking, it was his game of choice to play with his friends. Scott was back in the basketball league though, when a fateful day came. With his team leading 42-41 with 3 seconds left, Scott was called for a blocking foul and put the other team to the line. His father, Patrick, flipped out. And we don’t just mean yelling from the stands. He ran out onto the basketball court and confronted the 15-year old volunteer high school kid just officiating for fun and engaged him in a shouting match. This made the father of the official also charge out onto the basketball court. Mr. LaFave punched the son, then engaged the father in a fight. Then men were later subdued. Patrick LaFave was arrested and would eventually be charged with a 7-10 year prison. Poor Scott didn’t know what to do and his mother didn’t actually lend the kind of maternal support that you would have hoped for. Nope, instead, she blamed her son for it and constantly lectured him on how the incident would destroy his hope at a professional basketball career. To her, it was Scott’s hope. But it was become clear to those in the neighborhood that it was Ellen LaFave’s hope instead.

In the neighborhood were John and Brianna Taratino. They, too, had an athletic son. But unlike the LaFave’s they did not force anything on young Brett. He was not in the basketball league, but his parents certainly heard the news, and they asked Brett if they knew Scott LaFave. “Brett’s response to the question simply shocked, and appalled me,” recalled Brianna Taratino, “He told me he knew him very well, that they were friends in school but his parents forced him to have to practice basketball constantly. When he did play with me he told me that he really liked to play football, and that’s what he would play but his parents would never allow him to spend time on any other sport. The poor kid was only six years old. How do you do that to your son.” After two years of this situation ongoing, Brianna could not handle it anymore, and confronted Ellen LaFave personally. “I was cursed out and then we had a bit of a catfight.” It was after that, though, that Ellen soon found herself in the same spot as her husband, behind bars. “I probably did something I shouldn’t have,” Brianna Taratino reflects, “but I signed up Scott LaFave to play in a football league together with my son. It was my hope that Ellen would eventually see the light and realize that these are only kids but she totally went ballistic when she found out, and one night snuck into my house and pulled a knife on me, and attempted to stab me.” If not for John Taratino noticing just in time, the situation could have turned out badly. Ellen was detained, arrest, and sentenced to 20 years for attempted murder. Some may call it a happy ending, but for Scott LaFave, it was just the beginning. An aunt of Scott’s would eventually win over custody, and she was much more like what you would expect from a parent, although Brianna Taratino was more of Scott LaFave’s unofficial mother afterwards, and in fact, still is. Scott LaFave has not played another minute of basketball since.

So then came football, and the beginning of the realization that Scott LaFave and Brett Taratino were more then just a couple of kids who had been brought together by a series of unfortunate events, but that they were actually pretty good. Like most young very athletic kids, both of them were put in attacking positions, and they did really well there, almost too well to the point where their coach needed to give some other kids a chance to score. Therefore, Scott and Brett were made to be defenders. “The results were stunning,” reflects their coach at the time Kirk Rossfeld, “I wanted them to learn how to defend, but they obviously already knew. They were the best defensive players I had ever coached. I went to Brianna right away and told her look, I know we always want our kids to score, but these two have an uncanny ability on defense. She gave me complete support.” Rossfeld ended up coaching the kids until they were 14, moving up with them in class each time they graduated up a level simply because he enjoyed coaching them so much. Plus, Brianna Taratino also enjoyed him as Kirk was a very intelligent man, and related to Scott LaFave went through growing up. It was impossible for anyone in this small town to not have known the kind of twisted, selfish nature of his parents.

They continued to play together into high school, and their skills as defenders was becoming very well known throughout the empire as NPL scouts were attending games. The lowly Daytopia Racers then offered Scott LaFave, then just 15, a contract. A day later, Brett Taratino was offered one by South Tier. Should they each sign the contracts, they would be at completely opposite ends of the Empire; Scott in the northeast, and Brett in the southwest. But they knew it was best for them. They signed. Somehow, we believe that Ellen LaFave is aware that her son signed a million dollar deal with Daytopia, and Scott says, “She will never have a penny of it. Ever.” It’s unfortunate, but we can’t really blame him. The two kids now were in the NPL, and would be opponents, after having played together as kids almost their whole life. Who knew if they would ever play together again. Until Brian Carson called. “He offered me a spot on the Di Bradini team. Obviously I accepted.” said Brett Taratino, “When I found out Scott was also named as a starter and we would be playing in the same backfield again, it was just incredible, I really don’t know what to think. I am so happy to be able to play with him again.” Scott agrees. They say that a good backfield in football needs to have good chemistry and familiarity with one another to work at an optimum level. After what they went through as kids, Scott LaFave and Brett Taratino couldn’t be any more familiar with one another.

Lights lose opener to host Starblaydia

Last night the Purple Knights under 21 team of Taeshan opened up there fifth out of six Di Bradini cup's with a first encounter against host Starblaydia. The Knights were easily defeated by the powerhouse that is the Starblaydia team who are the future national squad members of the reigning world cup champs. The Knights wil either play Cafundeu who one ther meeting with Kansiov, in the next match, or the new Kansiov team themselves. Either way we are sure to lose.

Matchday Two Scores
a.k.a. The Day The Elves Stood Still

Group A
Kansiov 0-1 Starbaydia
Taeshan 1-1 Cafundéu

Group B
Candelaria And Marquez 2-0 Elves Security Forces
Blouman Empire 3-1 Ameriganastan

Group C
Land de Wood 2-2 Yafor 2
Newmanistan 2-1 Krytenia

Group D
Jeruselem 0-2 Daehanjeiguk
Lovisa 1-2 Sorthern Northland

(Tables to come when I'm not at work)

Land de Wood Sports Di Bradini Cup Special


So into our second game, these time our youngsters faced Yafor 2 who only narrowly lost to group favourites Newmanistan in their first game, and would be looking to win this game to get back into their stride. Our youngsters of course won their first game and had high hopes of making it two in a row.

Things started badly as Ahershk Valinial got down the right wing for Yafor 2, put the cross in and there was Jamie Durand to strike home a beauty from 25 yards out. 1-0 and only 3 minutes gone.
While Woodrow Wilson was kept quiet on the left wing, Tom Darkless managed to make a couple of good runs down the right but none of any consequence.
Then without warning with 34 minutes on the clock, Amario Otavias broke down the left, moved inside but then is hauled down by Daniel Delorit just inside the area. The referee immediately blew his whistle, booked Delorit and gave Yafor 2 a penalty.
Amario Otavias who won the penalty had no hesitation in taking the ball and planting it on the spot. Steve Pilot moved around a bit on his line trying to put Otavias off, but Otavias struck it straight in the corner, a fine penalty. 2-0 and our boys are in trouble.
When the half time whistle blew our manager looked please just to get his boys in without letting any more in. When the teams came out in the second half, changes had been made. Having missed the first game due to Oxen Cup duty, Ray Hamil, Kevin Wallace, Richard Higgins came on for Daniel Delorit, Woodrow Wilson, John Little.
Immediately Kevin Wallace took the left wing by storm twice beating Ahagarishk Va'ask but failing to deliver the final ball.
Then 10 minutes into the 2nd half, Aigner made a break from the middle, played a lovely ball through to Richard Higgins, who scored from 20 yards out. 2-1 and game on folks.
Yafor 2, tried to shut up shop at this point, as our boys charged forward.
20 minutes passed with the odd good attacking move but no shooting opportunites.
Then in the 31st minute, Tom Darkless found room on the right got passed Ahagorsk Hilvantir, played a lovely cross in, David Bomber headed it goalwards, Tarakaran Divanlir pulled of a dramatic save, pushing the ball out for the corner. Ray Hamil came up from the back to take it, playing it short to Tom Darkless who got the cross in, David Bomber headed it down and there was Richard Higgins to score his second of the game. 2-2 all even again.
Yafor 2 then started to pour forward trying to grab a late winner, but were matched by the Land de Wood defense. Land de Wood counter attacked well a couple of times but couldn't find a way through their opponenets defense themselves. Final score 2-2.

And our boys having won 1 and drawn 1, now face the mighty Newmanistan, knowing that even if they lose they could still sneak through, but ideally they need to grab a point or even a win.

Next team line up.
Formation 4-1-3-2. Style: attackive [+1]

Steve Pilot
Ray Hamil Richard Wilson Leyti Goldberg Joshua Ashton
Charlot Avakian
Tom Darkless Garnet Aigner Kevin Wallace
David Bomber Richard Higgins

sorry but my post about the game did not get threw jolt i cant rewrite it as i think it was my best ever and it is a true shame noone else will be able to see it as it i believe could have been up there with the greatest ever but oh well

Shin & Shim & Hwang: BOO! BOO! Bad call!

Wang: Again... with the screaming?

Shin: Even you have to agree. That was a lame excuse! The ref justs wants to give the Jeruselem boys a shot.

Wang: I've seen plenty of shots. In both directions. What makes this one different?

Shim: Come on. One of those Jeruselem boys took a shot, and Jeong (Pilgyo) blocked it! But the ref thinks that the Jeong rammed into his feet or something. I guess we should be happy that he didn't pull out a card or something.

Wang: Wait. The goalkeeper committed a foul? How is that even possible?

Hwang: It's only possible when it's the opposition's goalkeeper. I mean, we're proving our worth, despite all of those lame calls. We've got 2 goals, and the Jeru boys only have 1.

Shin: They don't have any goals, Hwang. *whacks him on the head*

Wang: So it's 2-0. Who cares if the referee pulls a cheap shot to give the Jeru boys a consolation...

Shin: He's blocked it!!!! %$#^!!!

Shin & Shim & Hwang: w3"YL:3$W?g.es, mjjdkasgbljamklfhewquroirwy09t983y4545wtreavfdsdjfu6IO(87p.
;l,;bvq'wktejjkykgg53wefwacsfvg\rey]t;
wcrthrjrkG5u4uwgfe.wT3efdasm,/.msgkltr3u2w4tregs?
>tjerkomvkwmfqewh51!!!

Wang: *wipes out ears* That didn't make any sense at all!

Shin: That PK was going straight for the top corner, but Jeong blocked it, punted it out for a corner! Great save!

Wang: See, why can't you do that the first time? My ears are all stuffed with weird nonsense.

Hwang: Quiet everyone! It's a corner!

*crickets chirp*

Shin: That goes for you too!

*crickets stop chirping*

*unnerving silence for thirty seconds as the corner gets punted out*

SUPER: Cheese crackers anyone?

Shin: *shrieks*

*Shim & Wang & Hwang all wipe ears*

SUPER: Did I say something? *leaves*

Shim: Is it me or does he seem to get more and more annoying every time he pops in?

Wang: Welcome to the brilliant life. I suppose you'd be surprised if anything ever improves after day 1.

Shin: I'm going to rip out his lungs! *goes chasing the Supervisor*

Hwang: Wang, you'd better catch her.

Wang: Why should I stop her? She's doing us a favor.

Hwang: But he pays our checks. And I'm glued to the wall.

Shim: And I'm not as masculine as you.

Wang: What does that have to do with anything?

Shim: It's an argument that's worked for over 2 millennia. Don't try to erode its credentials!

Wang: *murmurs as he leaves* At least I won't have to watch the game.

Shim: And there's the final whistle!!! We won!!!! WON!!!! *goes up to Hwang and hits him on the chest*

Hwang: Whoohoo! *hits Shim on the chest, who falls on the machine* Uh oh...

SUPER: I've got a report that the masquerading pistachios disappeared from C&M. Is there something that's going on here? *sees Shim sitting on the machine* Oh, well great job Shim! You've fixed it! Keep up the good work!

Shim: Well, where are Wang and Shin?

Hwang: They're on TV!

Shim: WTFM?

=== Starblaydia ===

Wang: Ugh... where are we?

Shin: We're in Starblaydia, you twit.

Wang: Wait. We're not supposed to be in Starblaydia.

Shin: Yeah, and I'm not made of money. How do we get on about our work if we're stuck all of the way out here?

Wang: That must mean Hwang pressed the button!

Shin: I've already figured that one out. Otherwise, the Supervisor gave us instant teleport tickets to Starblaydia.

Wang: We've got to get back! Ack!!!! *runs into a pole*

Shin: Hmmm. You know, this could be a grand opportunity to sparkle up your wardrobe. Come on, we're going shopping! *drags Wang*

=== Control Room ===

Shim: The Supervisor must not know that Wang and Shin are out of the Box.

Hwang: Oh no! She's taking him shopping!

Shim: What's wrong with that?

Hwang: Wang hates ... *with dread and terror* shopping.

Shim: I think I'll take you shopping some time.

Hwang: Oh, I love to shop. I could shop all day. In fact, I do shop all day, online at least. But Wang... he hates ... *with dread and terror* shopping.

Shim: Okay I get it. Maybe that's why his style is so bland.

Hwang: That's what I told him. I told him, "Wang - you seriously need to wear some pink."

Shim: *staring oddly at Hwang* Pink?

Hwang: Pink.

Shim: Wang doesn't look good in pink.

Hwang: He needs to wear ... *with dread and terror* pink. It'll do his body some good.

Shim: What does wearing a color have anything to do with his health? *thinks to herself - "No wonder he always wears that odd lavender hoodie all of the time"*

Hwang: Pink liberates the soul from the eternal chains of ... *with dread and terror* black-and-whiteness.

Shim: Would you cut that out? And yeah, I guess so. But Wang would look lovely in red. Velvety red.

Hwang: He's not a purse! He needs ... *with dread and terror* pink.

Shim: Cut that out! I'm not asking again. And seriously, he would look lovely in red. Either that or green.

Hwang: It must be ... *with dread and terror* pink.

Shim: *whacks Hwang*

=== Starblaydia ===

Shin: Doesn't he look lovely?

STB Clerk: I don't understand a word you're saying, but you'd better have the money for that.

Shin: Wang, wake up!

STB Cashiers: Oh, no! Maybe they're Mujeongbu terrorists?

STB Clerk: What makes you say that?

STB Cashier: Well, look at them! They look like the same people who bombed out those Krytie bastards! And one of them is asleep! He must be the trigger guy! They like to blow stuff up, I hear.

STB Clerk: You've been reading too many comic books. They're genuine customers, and they'd better have money.

Shin: Wang, wake up! *slaps Wang*

Wang: Oh my... *faints*

Shin: Great...

STB Clerk: They do look a little suspicious. Maybe they're theives?

STB Cashier: I'm calling the police. I don't want to get blown up.

STB Clerk: Don't do that! Then we'll lose our customers! They won't shop at a place that harbors terrorists! Even suspected terrorists!

STB Cashier: I'd rather live than get blown up.

STB Clerk: I suppose that makes sense somehow.

Shin: Wang, you'd better wake up now! There's a lot of people watching you.

Wang: *recovers* You brought me... *with dread and terror* shopping?

Shin: *slaps Wang* Of course. You need some style in your life.

Wang: I get enough of it! It's called "Hwang".

Shin: But your shirts and trousers are all black and white. Heck, even your underwear is black and white. I suppose if you had a choice, your skin and eyes would be black and white. You look like a mime.

Wang: But it's office rules!

Shin: That doesn't stop Hwang from wearing that horrific lavender hoodie.

Wang: But I don't like hoodies! Even the black and white ones! Get me out of here! I hate ... *with dread and terror* shopping.

Shin: *whacks Wang* Get yourself together. It's just some new clothes. Besides, you look nice in purple. Seems to be the only color in this store, anyway...

STB Police: Freeze!

Shin: Hmm, they're pointing their guns at us. Maybe there's someone stealing stuff behind us.

Wang: There's a wall behind us. I think they're pointing at us...

Coach: You lot, what's wrong with you. A bunch of Asians just beat us! Stop playing like ... girls!
Jay: Coach, the Oxen Cup 7 team won the cup ... and they had girls in it!
Coach: OK, used the wrong word. Our Jeruselem girls are whores but they can play football. Stop playing like ... pansies, sissies, fairies, pinkies!

<Team look confused>

Coach: Play like men! Tack hard, run hard, fight hard, chase hard, get what I mean. Don't play like Jeruselem girls. They aren't men!
Jay: Some of Jeruselem girls play really tough! We can't play play like that.
Coach: You're young men! You can beat anyone if you try.
Dank: But we're just still kids sir.

Coach:
I'll make men of all of you. You'll be better than those whores in the Jeruselem team. Now, I want a better game! I want you all to work harder and play like men. Don't copy the girls, they play a style like that Dazza Dallas superwhore ... based on speed. We'll play a game based on strength like men do. You can't win playing like the Jeruselem women because you're not women. Get in hard, make the opposition scared because you're a man!

Jay: But sir, most of goal scored in the Oxen Cup 7 for Jeruselem were girls.
Coach: Yes, but that's the World Cup team. They are experienced pros. I want a team of men to win this to show, we don't need girls in the team. Say, how come you ask all the questions?
Jay: Because I like being a nuisance.
Coach: You spend far too much time around girls.

Dank: Can we train at a reasonable time of day sir?
Coach: What do you mean?
Dank: In the middle of day is too hot, it's not good for the sunburn.
Coach: No, it's to make you tougher and stronger. Stop being a girl.

Dank: No, I sunburn easily. Most games aren't played in the blazing sun.
Coach: I'm the coach, I know what I need to make you all real men and real football players.
Jay: How come you hide in the shade? While we cook in the sun?
Coach: I'm the coach! I'm in charge.

Group D
Jeruselem (2-0)
Sorthern Northland
Lovisa (3-1)


Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 HAN 2 2 0 0 5 1 4 6
2 SNO 2 1 1 0 3 2 1 4
3 JRU 2 0 1 1 1 3 -2 1
4 LOV 2 0 0 2 2 5 -3 0

The Boring Edition

Standing tall on Group D, the Han are making a proud case to mark their second attempt for the silverware. They came strong off a 3-1 win over Lovisa to maul the Jeruselem Protestant Colllege Boys. Their coach could be heard for miles as he ridiculed them for playing like "pansies, sissies, fairies, pinkies", encouraging them to play like "men". Whatever that happens the mean, the conversation was heard for miles (we just said that, ed.) amid worries coming out of their poor performance thusfar. They'll be hoping for a win against Lovisa, while also hoping that the Han seriously beat the %$#^ out of Sorthern Northland. Of course, Sorthern Northland will be looking to end their tradition of poor performances with a good solid win over the Han, while the Han will be looking to continue their solid performance with a win over the Sortherners. In any case, the Han will be heading into the Quarterfinals for their 3rd consecutive Cup.

The Whacked Edition

Masquerading Pistachios were temporary new inhabitants of Candelaria And Marquez before they summarily disappeared in the same mysterious manner as they appeared. Singing Bean experts suggest that the sudden appearance might have mirrored similar circumstances as when the Singing Beans first appeared. "They both came during times of the DBC. They both are sentient beings that appeared out of no where, and they're both sentient beings of things we wouldn't expect to be normally sentient. It's odd but true." In the same manner, the Singing Beans of Candelaria And Marquez may share a similar fate with the Masquerading Pistachios. "They could just as easily disappear too." That's sent some of the beans into an apocalyptic fever, as they await the End of the World.

The Heartbreaking Edition

The last surviving heir to the Tutustan throne has announced his intention to sacrifice his/her/its life to ensure the salvation and safety of Tutustan. The ceremony is set to take place at noon tomorrow. Bring a fork and knife, says the official response.

im truly sorry everyone i know its not so beleiveable but it was great

THE FOOTBALL DIARY
Your new option of Sports Magazine - daily!
Just V$1,00 - ten pages of daily football news!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

UNWELCOME RESULT OPENS SPACE FOR FIRST CRITICS

After the win in the first game against Kansiov, David Nefasto's team faced Taeshan in the second game, a game that was a must win one, according to the Cafundelense supporters. The team needed to win as many points as it could before the vital game against Starblaydia. But something went wrong, the team faced many problems and was unable to defeat Taeshan. In the end, an unwenlcome 1x1 draw, that made many supporters angry with the team, and triggered the first complaints. Some are already criticizing the coach, while others still direct their complaints at the direction of the players.

About the game, the Monopolists' problems started out of nothing. In fact, this just wasn't a good day for them. Taeshan seemed to play well and block their attacks, and worried Nefasto with their attacks for many times. Luckily, Cafundéu was still superior, and could hold the opponents, but unable to react. The first half ended in a 0x0 draw. While the Taeshan coach seemed satisfied with his team's performance, which seemed ready to score a goal and win the game, Nefasto was clearly worried. Changes needed to be made, but in the second half few of them were done.

But, slowly, the Monopolists started to play better. The connection between the midfield and the attack seemed good, with Matoso being the leader in that sector of the field. Cafundéu started to threaten the opponents, but the finishing still wasn't good. Only in the seventy-fourth minute the red-black team scored, after an individual play made by the man of the match, Matoso, who dribbled two players and shot to score. But Taeshan replied less than a minute later, in an attack that surprised the Cafundelenses. The game ended with that result: 1x1.

CAFUNDÉU 1x1 TAESHAN

Referee: Dorivan Miccazi (Land de Wood).
MOTM: André Matoso (Cafundéu).

CAFUNDÉU: Peru; Rogério, Ivan, Nunes (Jules 65') and William; Fabinho, Serrano and Ilmari (Jackson 74'); Matoso, Sérgio Guará (Nando 45') and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

TAESHAN: Newton; Chuck, Pearsin, Meyerse and Lewis; Del Rio, Zack, Inca (Komen 60') and Gregory (Aztec 70'); Spensor and Zellefrow.
Coach: Lyran Strategos.

Goals:CAF: Matoso 74'.
TAE: Aztec 75'.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – formation for the game against Starblaydia: Peru; Rogério, Ivan, Japa and Nunes; Fabinho, Serrano and Ilmari; Matoso, Nando and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

Match’s Referee: Darren Sheffield (Candelaria And Marquez).

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC Goalscorers:

2- Alves
1- Serrano, Matoso

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS WIN AND CLINCH

Starblaydia- The Rockets took on Krytenia last night, and defeated the nation that was recently part of Starblaydia itself by the score of 2-1. It wasn’t the kind of win that we would recommend you recording and saving to watch over and over again for years to come, but the Rockets had a strong showing again. It was needed, because the Krytenians did everything they could to have success here, in Starblaydia. Coupled with the draw between Land de Wood and Yafor 2, Newmanistan has clinched advancement to the knockout stages with the win. Land de Wood is the Rockets next opponent, and the Rockets still will be wanting to win the group, something that they have not clinched. A second place finish could well mean an early meeting with Daehanjeiguk. The #1 and #2 ranked teams in the DBC probably would prefer to meet each other in a semifinal as opposed to a quarterfinal, if given a choice.

The colors of the day were sky blue and white no matter you looked. Whether it was fans holding the Newmanistanian flag, or waving the flag of Krytenia. Naturally, such was the case on the pitch with teams wearing an inverse of the others colors, for the most part. The teams had a passionate beginning, each trying to get control of the match of the early, but neither doing more then the other. Particularly notable plays were a little hard to come by as each team was playing so well defensively, they were making clears look easy, and when it looked like a nice run upfield for other chance was going to be created, the defense stood firm. After about twenty to twenty five minutes of this, the Rockets fans in attendance began to get a little antsy, something we haven’t usually seen here in the past, shouting for their team to show more urgency. Perhaps they felt as though the match was falling right into the hands of Krytenia. Many of the Krytenian fans, who were obviously in the majority playing so close to home, picked up on this and got louder in support of their team. Maybe they would strike first and take control of the match. In the 33rd minute, they had their best chance of the first half, one of which that was denied on a pretty outstretched save from Matt Sullivan. Just as the match looked as though it was going to head to halftime without a goal, Newmanistan found the back of the net in the 44th minute. The play started simply, with a clear by Brett Taratino, that by chance more then anything else, found Dirk Brogan in an outstanding position, and Dirk had plenty of room, so he just took off. He had Jennifer Vilardi joining him to his left, with two Krytenian defenders back. Brogan eluded one defender, then got the other to bite when he faked a pass to Vilardi. The keeper tried to play it the best he could, but once Brogan unloaded, there was nothing he could do. Rockets get a big goal, and took the one goal advantage into the break.

We’ve heard it many times that late first half goals can carry a lot of momentum into the second half and really deflate your opponents. This situation was no different, and manager Brian Carson essentially delivered that message, to go for number two quickly. But on the player’s minds, too, was to get an update on the South Thumbria crisis. Assistant Chris Merrill was on top of it, and the news seemed positive. Now maybe that too, could give the Rockets even more of a boost.

At the start of the second half, the old adage of late first half goals was once again proven to be true. Newmanistan started with a flurry, and Krytenia seemed on their heels, and this lead to sloppy and lazy play. Which usually means fouls and cards. In the 48th minute, one of those fouls led to a free kick about six yards outside the box. Brett Carlson was to take it, and with a Krytenian wall that looked in strong form, Carlson, instead of shooting, quickly passed to Jennifer Vilardi. Jennifer took the shot and the wall could not scatter in time. Perfectly placed in the top right corner to give Newmanistan a 2-nil lead. The Rockets shifted then to a defensive focus, and it worked very well. Sheldon Talcott and Scott LaFave were especially impressive in a stretch from the 50th minute to the 75th. In the 77th though, the Rockets made, perhaps, their only mistake of the night, but it was a huge one. With the Krytenians attacking, Brett Taratino made an aggressive tackle on Krytenia’s top goal scoring threat. Taratino was issued a red card for the tackle, and the Krytenian striker awarded a penalty kick. The shooter made it count, and brought his team back to within a goal, and his team had new life. They were not only back within one, but were now a man up. Carson knew the team had to completely focus on defense here, so he subbed out both of the Vilardi twins, who play up front, and entered Eric Blunden and Michelle Norton, both defenders. So while Newmanistan was short, they were in good shape in the back to withstand the final minutes of the contest.

It’s a 2-1 win for Newmanistan, and they sit on top of the group, and are assured of finishing no worse then second. They will next play Land de Wood, a nation that based on their media reports, already seems to be conceding the match to Newmanistan. We’re sure they’re players though, will be play hard, and go out all out for the victory. In place of Brett Taratino, who was red carded, Eric Blunden will start in the match, and Todd Benjamin will be promoted from reserve to substitute.

"ARGH!!! It's blinding!"

"Vhat? You mean you can finally zee daylight?"

"No, fecking Malachy's shining his torch right into my eyes."

"Oh. Cut it oot Malachy, it cannoot be far now."

"You said that about three days ago!"

"Yez I know, but we must be closer now."

"And how the hell will we know when we are there? I mean, I'm no expect in tunnelling but it all looks the same to me. It's just earth."

"Zhere vill be a pistachio nut at ze point to dig up. He vill talk to as in ze Latin."

"And do any of us speak Latin?"

"Ahh, good puint. No."

"So, what if he tells us something important."

"Ah, no vorries, I'm sure we vill be fine."

Later that night, there's a cold and bitter wind in the air, the leaves rustle briskly on their branches. The skies above are dark and laden with what looks like a forthcoming storm. The night is silent but for the whistle of the wind of the rustling of the leaves. A clock in the distance strikes five. Of course non of this matters as the protagonists of this story are some six feet under the ground. No, not dead. Digging a tunnel. But of course a tunnel makes for a more boring description than the description of the scene above ground which in fairness isn't all that exciting.

"So, Starblaydia. What do you think it'll be like?"

"I don't know and I don't care, Malachy. We're here on Operation Inisnadún's Freedom not a sightseeing trip."

"Sheesh someone got up on the wrong side of the bed!"

"Ze is vight Malachy, ve are not here for ze fun."

"Veni Vidi Abdicari."

"You what Bastian?"

"I zid not zay anything."

"Quidquid excusatio prandium pro."

"Er, Donal, that you?"

"Nope, not me either!"

"Mendacem memorem esse oportet."

"Alright Lorcan, you can cut it out now!"

"I didn't say anything ye bleeding eejit!"

"Facta non verba."

"Then who keeps talking?"

"Vēnī, vīdī, vīcī."

"Turn a torch on for fecks sake!"

*cricket chirps*

"What's a cricket doing down here?"

"I hate ... *with dread and terror* shopping."

"What's a Han doing down here? And how did he get here?"

"Hold on! They've gone already, how did they do that?"

"Vēnī, vīdī, vīcī."

"Oh hey I see the thing that keeps saying these random things."

"Aha, et iz ze Latin speakong pistachio! Vhere do ve go oh wise pistachio?"

"Ut sementem feceris ita metes."

"Er yes, good advice zhere. Aha, zhere is ze door!"

And so the four men clamber out of the tight tunnel they had been digging for days and into a lush meadow on the edge of a large city. The rising sun of dawn hits them immediately and each man shields his eyes from it.

"Ve are finally here. Zis is ze city vhere Zorthern Norhfland play ze Zhan Empire. Ve shall head zhere at vonce. Malachy you shall plant ze boom in the stadium. Me, Lorcan and ze other one, erm Doanl?"

"Ah, that be me name laddie."

"Excellent, me Lorcan and Donal shall go to ze hotel vhere zee Zorthern team vill be staying and ve shall kidnap one of ze players. We shall inform you of ze hideout when ve have got him zhere and then zhen we vill spread the message of ze Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún.

Malachy with the supplies to do his job leaves the other three in search of the stadium. Of course he doesn't know he has no chance of making it back home a free man, even if he did know that though, it wouldn't make any difference for he truly believes in the cause of his mission. The other three head of in the opposite direction and with them any sign of the tunnel they have just appeared from vanishes. All that is left there is the pistachio trying to convince a singing bean to buy a timeshare in Tutustan whilst a cricket chirps in agreement to the Pistachio's every word. Even if crickets don't understand Latin.

Songstress, Albrecht, Candelaria, Candelaria And Marquez, Rushmore, the World, the Yoonivers, Space


Years ago…


In a manner of speaking


They surged on forwards; a steaming, ugly mass of scared human beings and their sweaty bodies, pouring through the streets of downtown Albrecht like a massive gelatinous life form. The riot police continued to back away, utterly unprepared for such an outpouring of impotent rage, and unwilling to steam in, truncheons a-blazing, while the protest remained peaceful.

Yet anyone could see that it could go off at any time. The locals were, to a man, all safely locked up indoors and had been for hours, but they had reason to fear for their windows. The Turks, Kosenic and otherwise, the Bettians, the Jews, the West Indians, the French, the Lussolavizzovians, the Northlandish, the Nigerians, the Han, the Enataians, even your bog-standard Anglos who had the temerity to reside in godforsaken Songstress; anyone and their property would be fair game if it all kicked off. As it was, they were only just on the right side of ruly.

There was an organised, jackbooted bunch towards the left of the mob, prancing down Bellevue Road waving giant swastikas and screaming lumps of battered cod-German, from whom the rest of the group were keeping an embarrassed distance. The others were rather less well-drilled, preferring to limit themselves to the occasional racially-tinged chant (though after about fifteen minutes it was becoming a bugger to find rhyming couplets for ‘Moslems’), and making threats on the lives of Owen Adjidarmo, Subhi Mahadeen, and the neighbourhood that had supposedly been shielding the suspected terrorists.

Technically, the community in question was in the next district over, but Songstress had been deemed the better option, largely for being the home of the Millerman Sheppard Stadium. While the Big Blues were labouring to a 1-0 defeat at the hands of Zwangzug, the mob was attempting to cause as much noise as possible to make sure that hundreds of thousands of television viewers in the Candelarias would be well aware of what was going on in the streets outside the MSS. They weren’t particularly in the mood for a scrap. A couple of enterprising nazis had called upon Ravindiran Shashikanth’s Effigies While You Wait, on Cambridge Street, and were busy burning several disgraced foreign cricketers, which was the best they could drag out at a pinch, while there was the occasional scuffle between bearers of pre- and post-Republic flags, but everyone agreed afterwards that their point had been made, and that it had been a great day out for all the family, barring the young lass who got shot and all the arrests an’ everything.

For eight year-old Reuben Blakeman, it was just a trip to the capital; with all its colours and sounds and smells and taxis and exotic fish and unusual meat-based foodstuffs. A mere minute spent here was a thousand times more exciting than Lavange, and that costal resort was in itself infinitely more entertaining than his tiny home town. He wasn’t strictly sure about what they were protesting about, though his father had explained helpfully that, “all these governments have let ‘em come over here, breed like nobody’s business, live any way they want without any care for the rest of us an’, an’, an’, subjoogit their womenfolk, while the liberals here just bend forward and take it up the, uh, anyway,” he’d continued hastily, looking into the cherubic face of young Reuben, “we’re jus’ saying that the government should make sure these people jus’ can’t get away with whatever they like, and that they better lock up this Addydammo bloke an’ throw away the key here and now. Or string ‘im up, better yet. And he was an SD&GP candidate fer the city council! Gossake, that used t’be the party of the people, that did. Sort of. I think.”

“Bloody stupid name anyway, Hadjidummy,” he’d muttered later. “God knows why they can’t have proper, Candelarian names, like…” He’d paused, the faces of his drinking buddies Darren Fiasconi and Harry Iversen wandering into view. “What, like Evan Jones?” Reuben had asked innocently, compounding his father’s misery. Evan was in Year 6, and the only Candelariasian-Bettian at school.

Still, it didn’t do to worry about the affairs of adults too much, and the trip had offered a day out with his dad, so Reuben had cheerfully signed up in the end. He was just starting to regret it by the time things seemed to be turning nasty. A hail of Turkish invective had greeted the march as they turned a corner, and the police here – young, male Songstressians all – didn’t seem to be the sort to mess about. Reuben found himself pushed further and further back, but the crowd behind them weren’t yet aware of the obstacle in their way and pressed on forwards, tooting their horns and remaining oblivious to the slight boy caught in the crush. He yelped as a massive, lumped body piled into him, but his scream was cut short by a free-swinging elbow.

He felt a hand on his left shoulder, a authoritative paw that appeared quite convinced that it was supposed to be there. He struggled to remove his face from the cleave of a pair of denim-clad buttocks and look upwards, before a sharp voice from the opposite direction said; “No. Ben! This way!”

The figure to his right was dark, an almost unnatural midnight black. It also had no face.

Since a human with no face seemed almost as incongruous a sight at a far-right rally as the whole black thing; Reuben quickly decided that life would be safer, or at least far more interesting, in the company of the stranger. He let himself go limp, and the figure pulled on his arm while prising the crowd around him to part. They didn’t seem to notice, seemingly too caught up in screaming at the police to notice the new arrival, and simply flowed around the pair.

The boy allowed himself to be pulled into a tiny front garden, and down one of Songstress’ innumerable alleyways. He leant against the wall, panting and letting the first wave of tears wash down his face.

“Reuben,” the figure whispered beside him, “Just boot it, yeah?”

“Nnhnhnun?”

“Right up field. Forget about Anwamanë. She’s quick, but a bovine arse would be safe no matter how large a stringed instrument she was wielding.”

“Mnhm?”

“You’ll know. Gotta run.”

The figure didn’t move, but even through blurry eyes Reuben could see that it had changed fundamentally. It wasn’t breathing, for one thing.

Then it vanished into thin air.

The boy slumped into a grubby corner, hugging his knees. It was half an hour before strong arms reached out and dragged him into his father’s quivering embrace.


***


El din, Marquez


The Present Day


“¡Hey, gringo! ¡María, she finish the strawberry marinade!”

“¡Maravilloso! Now I can die a happy kernel, amigo!”

“¡Aye Caramba! Have you still not recovered from your severe case of the fungal pathogen Botryosphaeria dothidea?”

“No.”

“I love this show…”

Jack De Berlanger sighed, and looked up at the screen. “Couldn’t you be doing something more useful with your time, Dave?” he muttered to his flat-mate.

“Duuude,” Dave replied at length, for he was that kind of flat-mate, “It’s El Pishachos Disfrazado. It’s great. And educational.”

“…ecause I’m a drupe, not a nut, mi amigo!”

“Ehh, that’s one word for you! ¡¿Sepa lo que significo?!”

“That doesn’t even make any sense…”

“Never mind, it teaches the youth of the Candelarias Spanish… after a fashion… an’ it’s got some basic numeracy, nut-based humour…”

“Since when did Candelariasian kids need to be taught Spanish by a bunch of pistachios?”

“It’s a repeat, anyway,” Dave sniffed irritably. “TV2 cancelled it a couple of days ago. God knows why.”

“¡Soy una tuerca!”

“¡No, soy una tuerca!”

“¡Soy una tuerca!”

“¡No, soy una tuerca!”

“¡Una tuerca!”

“¡Dos tuercas! ¡¡Las tuercas juntas son nosotros!!”

“No, I can’t imagine… Please turn the telly off, Dave, I’m trying to think.”

*CLICK*

“–garees! Dungarees! My God, he’s wearing dungarees!”

“Or you could just ignore me and merely change the channel, whatever…”

*CLICK*

“ –at, I can’t love you, Humphrey, not like you want me t–”

*CLICK*

“–phthalmus, attacking with a flèche… But, of course, the sword-tail really does have an advantage here, doesn’t he, Mi–”

*CLICK*

“–ang; BANG! And the dirt is g–”

“KNOCK IT OFF!”

*CLICK*

“You’re only edgy ‘cos your editor made you work on the sports desk for a week.”

Jack frowned. “Yes. Obviously. I’m an investigative reporter, goddamnit!”

“So investigate something sporting.”

“Oh… It’s sport. Who really cares?”

Dave gave him a two-heads look. “Alright, well… What about the Olympics? There’s always scandal at the Olympics. Everyone’s saying the Newmanistanianianians are going t’have a 1-2-3 at the women’s hundred metres. That ain’t normal! They’re probably bulging with questionable testosterone!”

“I really don’t care about the Olympics, Dave.”

“Whatever. Suit yourself. Don’t say I never help you.”

*CLICK*

“–pected to win a majority of seats in the Green Island parliament, with polls having closed early this evening. That should oust Prime Minister Ferrington and propel Russell Lawrence into the top job with a massive mandate, but it may not be entirely good news for President Morton. Since replacing Natalie Ross as leader of the MLP on the island, Lawrence – nothing but an unashamed left-winger – has publicly criticised the new Albrecht administration during the election campaign, and called for Green Island people to take greater charge of their own affairs: he’s even widely expected to name local politics veteran Ellen Kidd as his Foreign Relations Minister, a post last used by the island’s government in 1970. President Morton is expected to congratulate Lawre–”

“Weird business down there, isn’t it?”

“Oh, now you want the television on…”

“I mean, I know they’re not politically on the same wavelength, but why would an MLP politician want to further damage a struggling national Premier?”

“God knows. Don’t suppose you’ve got a mars bar hidden anywhere, have you?”

“They’re even saying that they’re after full relations with the Eesseff! Just Green Island! Why would anyone want that, after what they did to the Assegai Developments?”

“No idea. I really do fancy a mars bar.”

“Dave?”

“Yeah?”

“How much do you reckon a ticket to Starblaydia would be?”

His flat-mate sighed. “More than a mars bar, I’m guessing.”


***


Jhanna, Starblaydia


Nowish


“God… They’re fit, aren’t they?”

“Mm. And athletic,” Hansson Kemp grinned, with a nod towards one of the elven midfielders.

“Hans… That’s a bloke, I think.”

Reuben Blakeman’s defensive partner shrugged. “In for a penny… God, it’s so hot…”

“I’m taking it you’re referring to the temperature,” Reuben smiled as he chugged down another bottle of water. Ryan Fattori lay crumpled in heap in the middle of the pitch, but the other C&M players were just grateful for the stoppage, and the chance to take on water. They were a goal to the good; but it seemed like an eternity ago when George Jones, bouncing around with enthusiasm at the chance to play for a team which wasn’t terminally crap for once, had waltzed between Ceine Jurangil and Tathar Súrion in a manner that must have had David Nefasto wincing, and hit a sweetly-struck shot that just got something on Stephias Deadleaf’s head and left Fëanáro Ciryatan sprawling. It hadn’t been their only chance, but at this rate it was going to be their very last in Jhanna. The Vanorians were piling in, as though they had twice as many players, and the nineteen year-old Blakeman was on his last legs. It didn’t matter how quick or assured on the ball you were, how much you’d filled out over the last couple of years; Finwë Celebrindal and Lúthien Anwamanë were always going to run rings around a Candelariasian with hardly more than half a dozen full senior matches under his belt.

“Rubes,” Abdul Ibadulla called out as they trotted back onto the pitch, “You’ve gotta stop hitting it long, mate! Séregon’s all over me like a rash! Go through Cohen, yeah? Or Gaz, if he’s coming on…”

Reuben nodded at the Radyukevich striker. He knew he had a habit of lumping it up front, but that was what made sense at C.A.L., with big Gregorio Morales still leading the line, and a godawful midfield.

The game got back underway with a drop ball, and the Vanorians were soon forcing the Candelariasians back. A baying crowd, with their unnerving opalescent skins and curious henna tattoos, made the lightweight Eesseffian side seem legion. Forward they piled, Súrion on the ball, then Delara, then Hardanal, then Celebrindal… Hansson was trying to keep his ground, but Reuben was edged back further and further, until he was almost on top of Peppi Elduayén in goal… Celebrindal was heading straight for him, and his heart was racing, panicking like it hadn’t for a decade as foes and friends alike croweded around him.

How do you pick out a needle in a haystack? How do you notice a faceless face in a crowd of ninety thousand? But there the figure was, all the same. Smiling?

Just boot it. Right up field.

But he couldn’t, he didn’t have the ball! He…

Celebrindal lost his footing. Reuben leapt forward to take control, but the beautiful Vyintanese striker Anwamanë was surging forwards still. He could pass it sideways, out to Grey Mendoza, and hope that Taikinu Ories didn’t intercept it. He could lob it forwards, but the girl would charge it down for sure, wouldn’t she?

Right up field. Forget about Anwamanë.

He shut his eyes and booted it. The ball sailed far into the sky, dropping down into the Vanorian box. Tom Smith got to it first, and whacked in C&M’s second.

Even the Candelariasian goalkeeper powered forwards to celebrate with Smith, but Reuben stayed still, and stared up into the crowd. And then wondered why.

The sirens were blasting all throughout Capri and Rinaldi and the few people who decided to remain on the island and the port citiy were heavily fortified inside their homes. For the first time in over a thousand ninety-three years, a hurricane was making its' way for the ESF. It was not just any hurricane, but a strong category four that was about to crash into the southeast part of the country. Dealsin Nicold was one of the few people still on Capri and was listening closely as the metorogolists were updating those still with power on the incoming storm.

"... with gusts of of over 200 mph. For anyone who has not evacuated, please stay inside your houses as the storm passes over. It's heading due west at ten miles per hour, and the eye of the storm is currently one hundred eight miles south-east of Capri proper. Hurricane Apollis is due to make landfall at 8:20 p.m. EEDT. Widespread flooding is "

With a blast of screeching wind, the power went out and Nicold was left in the dark. He looked over at his grandfather's old wooden clock and noted that it was currently 11 am. Deciding that he was not about to stay stuck in the dark, he headed towards his small workshop where he had one of those personal generators. As he opened up the door, a flash of bright light made him cover his eyes and take a few steps back. As the light subsided, he took a looked around and instictively reached for his smithing hammer was always leaning against the wall of his house when he wasn't using it. He was a blacksmith by trade, having the contract with the Raynors to provide their honor guard with the traditional scimitars. However, when he reached for it, his sweat-coated hands grasped nothing but air.

Quickly he spun around to see if he had just misplaced it, but he was completely flabergasted to see that where his house had been, there was now nothing but forest. All around him, the community that he blonged to, the houses were gone, replaced by the dence forest.

"By the gods, what trachery magic is this? What foul demon or spirit is casting this black magic? Show yourself you fiend!"

A brunette haired elf stepped forth from behind a tree and gave Nicold a sly smile. He noticed that her eyes were hazel, and that she was clothed in the typical warrior armor of when there was still the Elven Security Alliance, as well as carrying a quiver full or arrows with a compound bow strapped to her back.

"But I am no fiend Nicold. I suspect you know who I am quite well."

"But it can not be, I am neither dead nor a hero by any strech of the imagination."

"No you are not good blacksmith. You are quite alive and the hurricane that is about to hit your lands will suddenly dissapate without any scientific explination. Now, please hear me out, as you have a key role to play in the events that are about to transpire.

You and your family have been blacksmiths for the Raynors for many centuries, loyal to head of the ESF for as long as they have had power. They trust you and will take your advice without question, that is why I have come to you. You must have the good Tobias , oh so dear Tobias that has worked far beyond what he should have had to, make one last decision. He must had over control of the Great Leader seat to his new wife, she is going to be the guiding light of the future for the ESF and Vyinta, if they are to have a future."

"And if I can not get the lad to hand over power?"

"Then all is lost and the Tides of Darkness shall come again!!! Now go, there is a destiny that must be fufilled!"

Another blinding light left Nicold dazed once again, he found that he was back inside his house and that his dear clock still showed 11. Suddenly the power jumped back to life and as he switched on his television, he was able to get all the confirmation he needed.

"I don't know how, but the storm has completely vanished from radar. Just in a matter of seconds it was there and then it was not. It's a complete and utter miracle!"

I guess it's time to make a trip to Raynor City then.

Matchday Three Scores
a.k.a. We don't need no steenking tables

Group A
Starblaydia 1-3 Cafundeu
Kansiov 0-2 Taeshan

Group B
Elves Security Forces 4-0 Ameriganastan
Candelaria And Marquez 3-2 Blouman Empire

Group C
Yafor 2 2-0 Krytenia
Land de Wood 1-2 Nemanistan

Group D
Daehanjeiguk 3-3 Sorthern Northland
Jeruselem 3-1 Lovisa

(Anyone who posts some tables - that I will be checking before doing official QF lineups - gets a bonus for the next round, not just the first team to do so, any team as long as you don't just copy-paste what's already been done.)

(Taratino and Carlson converse in Carlson’s hotel room the night after the game)

Taratino: Yo Brett, let’s go out, we earned it man! 3 wins in 3 games!

Carlson: Pretty soon, I’m a little tired, just watching some TV.

Taratino: What’s that your watching?

Carlson: Something called the Wayne and Dwayne show, it’s pretty boring. I mean the first couple episodes were funny, but it gets redundant after a while. Here, watch:

Wayne: No don’t press that button.
Dwayne: (presses button)
Wayne: Nooo!!! (whacks Dwayne on head)
Dwayne: What?
Wayne: You just blew something up. Now our boss is gonna be mad. Hey look football’s on!

Taratino: I could see that getting a little boring after a while.

Carlson: Yeah.

Taratino: But maybe more entertaining then just sitting there and reading the paper and game recaps and interviews with head coaches and stuff.

Carlson: I miss home, you know, the things that are on the TV here just aren’t as exciting as Newmanistanian sitcoms.

Taratino: You mean you didn’t watch the episode of SuperPistachio guy? He was born in an airport.

Carlson: Pistachio nuts are about as old as Wayne and Dwayne. Not quite, but getting there.

Taratino: How about checking out pictures of the Sallad girls on the web?

Carlson: Ok, that I admit, never gets old. (Laughs)

Taratino: So how about going on the internet and reading an exciting game report of how we won?

Carlson: I know how we won. I wish we were old enough to drink here. I don’t want to chance getting busted with my fake in Starblaydia.

Taratino: I agree, that’d be bad press. But perhaps a more entertaining news story.

Carlson: Nah, I don’t need that. Sheldon could buy us some.

Taratino: Sheldon doesn’t drink.

Carlson: Oh, I thought he was just kidding. He really doesn’t?

Taratino: Nope. And please, turn Wayne and Dwayne off, it’s annoying.

(Carlson clicks it off)

Carlson: What’s going on back home with the war, have you heard?

Taratino: It’s been pretty calm the last 24 hours, I’ve heard, the two sides aren’t fighting as hard as we thought they were and it might be a little more diplomatic of an ending.

Carlson: Yeah, hey I got an idea?

Taratino: How about we put Wayne and Dwayne in the middle of the combat and watch them get blown up.

Carlson: (laughs) That would be the best series finale I could think of. Unless SuperPistachio guy came and saved the day.

Taratino: He can get blown up too, and all his pistachios with it.

Carlson: Ok, let’s read some game reports. Is ours up yet?

Taratino: No, not yet. Probably soon, though.

Carlson: Alright, I’ll read about the Cafundeu game, their reports are always nice and to the point. Or Candelaria And Marquez, long, but they get your attention.

Taratino: Like Rocket Reports?

Carlson: We wish!

Well it was down to our final game and a game we really needed to get something from but we faced the mighty Nemanistan, winners of the 4th Di Bradini cup, runners up in the 5th Di Bradini cup, this was going to be a mighty test for our youngsters, with our Oxen Cup stars recalled to the side, a stronger line up was taking to the field.

As usual our boys came out attacking and this caught Nemanistan by surprise.
After just 3 minutes Kevin Wallace made a good run down the left catching their full back out of position and whipping in a lovely cross for David Bomber to head home. 1-0 up against the favourites, would this be the night Land de Wood youngsters showed their true worth.
The Newmanistan coach is going crazy at his players from the sideline he can't believe they've let in an early goal against newcomers to the international football scene.

His team quickly tighten up at the back, blocking Land de Wood's attacks and countering them well.
After 15 minutes Dirk Brogan made another breaking run from the middle of the park, beat a Charlot Avakian, then passed it to Brett Carlson who beat Richard Wilson and slotted the ball into the back of the net leaving
Steve Pilot without a chance.

Andrew Wood is telling his players to calm down and play the ball to feet as they start hoofing long balls up to David Bomber.

Half time comes and it is 1-1. A point from this game would be nice but the second half is all to play for.

Land de Wood come out fighting but can't find a way through this Newmanistan defense. One or two players are looking tired and Charlot Avakian picks up a silly yellow card for a late tackle. In the 65th minute Tom Darkless who is looking tired down the right wing comes of for Woodrow Wilson who will play down the left with Kevin Wallace switching flanks, Jamie Beveridge comes on for the tiring Charlot Avakian.

However while our boys are still sorting out their formation, Jennifer Vilardi makes a good run, feeds the ball to wonderkid Brett Carlson who slots the ball into the back of the net. 2-1.

Knowing that they really need to grab a draw here John Little is brought on for Garnet Aigner as our boys switch to a 4-3-3. Play continues and while both sides have chances neither side can get a win.
So it all depends on how that other game finishes as to whether or not our boys progress

So lets look at the final tables for each group and see who progresses and who doesn't:

Group A Pts GD GF GA
Cafundéu 7 4 7 3
Starblaydia 6 1 4 3
Taeshan 4 0 3 3
Kansiov 0 -5 1 6

Group B Pts GD GF GA
C&M 9 6 8 2
Elves 6 5 8 3
Blouman 3 -2 6 8
Ameriganastan 0 -9 1 10

Group C Pts GD GF GA
Newmanistan 9 3 6 3
Land de Wood 4 1 5 4
Yafor 2 4 1 5 4
Krytenia 0 -5 1 6

Group D Pts GD GF GA
Daehanjeiguk 7 4 8 4
S. Northland 5 1 7 6
Jeruselem 4 0 5 5
Lovisa 0 -5 3 8

Teams in blue qualify. Teams in red are waiting for the organisers to decide.

So we qualify in 2nd place in our group. Well actually I'm not sure we have an exact same record as Yafor 2 do, and we draw our game, so about the only way they can be separated having looked through every rule book going is by alphabetical order or rank order, we come before them in the alphabet and were ranked lower than them so I think we might have a chance, it's either that or we toss a coin as happened in one competition or we have a penalty shoot out as was rumoured to be suggested for another competition. I'm sure the organisers will work something out and let us know in due course.

LdW got there first, but what the hey.


Group A
Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Cafundéu 3 2 1 0 7 3 4 7
2 Starblaydia 3 2 0 1 4 3 1 6
3 Taeshan 3 1 1 1 3 3 0 4
4 Kansiov 3 0 0 3 1 6 -5 0

Group B
Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Candelaria And Marquez 3 3 0 0 8 2 6 9
2 Valanora 3 2 0 1 8 3 5 6
3 Blouman Empire 3 1 0 2 6 8 -2 3
4 Ameriganistan 3 0 0 3 1 10 -9 0

Group C
Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Newmanistan 3 3 0 0 6 3 3 9
2 Yafor 2 3 1 1 1 4 3 1 4*
3 Land de Wood 3 1 1 1 4 3 1 4*
4 Krytenia 3 0 0 3 1 6 -5 0

Group D
Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Daehanjeiguk 3 2 1 0 8 4 4 7
2 Sorthern Northland 3 1 2 0 7 6 1 4
3 Jeruselem 3 1 1 1 5 5 0 4
4 Lovisa 3 0 0 3 3 8 -5 0

*Qualifying between Yafor 2 and Land de Wood remain undetermined.

Coach:
YEAH! Men ... that's better! God made us men not girls. So play like men. That's a lot better. But I need see some improvement! I want see you stop slacking even if you're winning. The Jeruselem with it's whores run around like Banshees even if they are winning, they don't stop and rest. You should do the same! The opponent is weak, losing, behind ... smash them! Score as many goals as you can so they lose all hope and give up. Look don't settle down and be LAZY. Keep going because you slack, the opponent sees you are weak. God didn't make the Earth for people who don't fight for themselves. OK, God was us to be STRONG and show we are the MEN who can win. Right, I found this indecent photo. We are Christian men, we don't need porn.

Jay: Oh, it's mine!
Coach: You again. Who is it?
Jay: Come on coach, you know it is.
Coach: Yes, I'm know it's Princess Marie-Antonette Dallas.

Jay: So, what didn't destroy it?
Coach: I'll get in trouble for tearing up images of our leaders.
Jay: I want it back please!

Coach:
Yes, but keep it away from public eyes. Right! Today was good but I want better. I want all of you to work harder! I want more skills, strength and commitment to the team and of course, God. Boys, one day - we'll have a team of men at the World Cup representing Jeruselem again. We've got Catholic Nun coaching the team right now. How silly is that? At least she's a good Christian compared to some of the previous coaches. Maybe we can be that team of men.

Taw: Coach, why is Jay on this team. He's such a troublemaker!
Coach: He's our best striker even if he does have trouble keeping away from girls.
Taw: Girls? Where? Keep them away from me!
Coach: Taw, calm down.

<Young lady, the cleaner comes in>

Taw: Girls! (hides0
Jay: Coach, why is he on this team?
Coach: Supposedly to fix this personal issue.
Jay: It's not working.

Complete confusion surrounds group C of the Di Bradini Cup. We have just read a media report from Candelaria And Marquez which increases the goal difference of Yafor 2 to 2, but they also increased our goal difference to 2 as well, so we are still completely level. However, having rechecked our scores I don't know why they've increase our goal difference to 2. Any suggestions welcome.
Mind you looking at the Candelaria and Marquez report again group D seems a bit out as well as there are 3 teams with 1 draw listed each, which doesn't add up, as there should always be an even number for the total number of draws. According to our reckoning Southern Northland should have 2 draws not 1.

Have we made a mistake? I doubt it, I think this is another situation where foreign media are trying to spread doubt and confusion just as Dancougar's sports centre did in the Oxen Cup not so long ago.
The whole world's media is conspiring against us! Should give our manager Andrew Wood plenty of material to build up a siege mentality with his team.

(OOC: Fix the spelling of Di Bradini or Star will have you lose the tiebreaker because of that :) )

We are delighted to see that not quite the whole world is against us!
Newmanistan have just passed us a note reminding us of the importance of spelling the name of the competition correctly.
We do apologise to the organisers of the Di Bradini cup for this typo and hope it will not have any bearing on our football team's tie breaker and thank Newmanistan for bringing this to our attention.

The Albrecht Herald Online Global Edition>C&M News>Latest Updates

CRORIS demands dismissals, slams ‘institutional racism’ Oluwa Onwumbiko-Johnson, chair of the non-governmental Commission for the Removal of Racism in Society, has called for the head of Ray Farrelly, the editor of the CAMAFA’s official website, after incorrect Di Bradini Cup group tables were published this morning.

Among the major competing nations to lose out was Sorthern Northland, who were undefeated in the group stage, but listed only as having accrued four points. Daehanjeiguk also appeared to have only played two games.

“This is a clear and unforgivable slur against C&M’s ethnic Han and Northlandish communities,” Onwumbiko-Johnson told TV1, “But sadly typical of this organisation. Where are the Candelariasian-Northlandish involved in professional sports in these islands, where are the Eastasians? It’s simply beyond the pale that in this day and age, these valued communities must battle day and night against rampant discrimination and the thinly-veiled disdain of their fellow citizens.”

Farrelly has since defended his team as “making an honest mistake”, but that is unlikely to satisfy acting CAMAFA President Sam Mc O’Neil. The Unionist MP Georgette Khan has leapt to Farelly’s defence, describing Onwumbiko-Johnson’s organisation, and the Land de Wood News as ‘annoyances’, and accusing them of rank hypocrisy. “I await with interest the formal apology to the peoples of Candelaria And Marquez and Sorthern Northland, for the incorrect capitalisation of the former and hopeless misspelling of the latter, to follow their regrettable besmirching of the name of one of the greatest footballers this planet has ever produced.”

The faulty tables were altered an hour ago, with no further comment on the CAMAFA site.

THE ROCKET REPORT

EXPERIENCE PAYS OFF

Starblaydia- Last night’s game between Newmanistan and Land de Wood was a pretty good one. The Rockets, as they had done in their previous two games, were the victors in the contest by another 2-1 scoreline. This one though, had them sweat a little more then the other two. We knew coming into the match that Land de Wood would be a formidable opponent as this is a nation who has declared their commitment to becoming a successful football power, and they have chosen the same path in which we did eight years ago. A Di Bradini Cup before the Baptism of Fire. They aren’t officially eliminated yet, as our crack staff here at the Rocket Report have been looking hard to find out the tiebreaker criteria between them and Yafor 2. They drew when they met, and finished equal in GD, and in GF. A playoff game, perhaps? We shall see.

If you can recall back to eight years ago in Newmanistan’s first Di Bradini Cup, you can remember that many times that were super aggressive to get an early goal that can set the tone for the match. They’ve since cut down on doing that, but for an underdog, as Andrew Wood’s team was, it’s always a good strategy. It paid off as they scored in just the game’s third minute. Sheldon Talcott slipped for a split second, and it allowed Kevin Wallace plenty of room for a run, in which he would set up David Bomber for a header. Playing in the place of Brett Taratino, who was red carded against Krytenia and out of this game, Eric Blunden could not outleap Bomber. However, if that was Taratino, the result could have been a little different. But anyway, not that it mattered, Land de Wood was up 1 goal to nil. Brian Carson reminded his team to settle down in an apparent demonstrative manner, but really he was just letting his team know to just tighten up a little better, and to keep the focus. Carson knew, with so much time left, that there would be plenty of time for Newmanistan to answer the goal, and sure enough, the tide of the game began to shift in favor of the Rockets. With the defense asserting control of the game, Dirk Brogan intercepted a pass and had plenty of running room, so much like he did against Krytenia in the last game, he just took off. He had a couple of options, but noticed that Brett Carlson had a good run, and fed him a perfect pass. After making Richard Wilson look silly with a sweet fake, he was in on net, and there was nothing that Steve Pilot could have done. Carlson fired it home, in the bottom right corner, perfectly placed, to tie the game up at one in the 15th minute. After the goal, the Rockets had control of the match still, with Carlson and Jennifer Vilardi working some nice passing plays, one leading to a golden 33rd minute opportunity by Jennifer with smacked off the post. Land de Wood attempted to answer by heaving up prayers to David Bomber for the rest of the half, but the defense of Scott LaFave and Sheldon Talcott read each one quite well.

During the intermission, Brian Carson was happy with the performance of the team. Newmanistan had already clinched advancement prior to the match, and Land de Wood was a team desparately needing a win, or at the very least, a draw. He attributed the early goal scored by (OOC: you need a team nickname!) to those facts, and enjoyed the way the Rockets took control of the match. They weren’t dominating, but they didn’t have to. Land de Wood obvously had become frustrated after the Carlson goal and seemed to lose a lot of that opening confidence that they had come into the match with. With it 1-1 entering the second half, Carson anticipated that they would try to come out flying again, so how best to answer that? For the Rockets to come out flying themselves.

At the start of the second half, the Rockets bring it, but surprisingly Land de Wood was not as aggressive as Carson thought they would be. The offense was working, and Steve Pilot was making some absolutely amazing saves, including a brilliant stop on Shannon Vilardi in the 49th minute, and a Brett Carlson strike in the 52nd. Then in the 55th minute, he turned aside what looked to be a header perfectly labelled for the top left corner. No way, said Mr. Pilot. The newcomers were beginning to show quite a bit of fatigue, worn out, by the speed of the Rockets and the fact that our guys, especially James Seidler, never back down from an opportunity to lay a hard tackle on an opponent. In the 59th, Seidler did just that, getting Charlot Avakian with a hard, but completely clean tackle. James sensed that Charlot was getting a leg weary, so he just wanted to help that become more of the case. Avakian then made a sloppy retaliation attempt on Seidler, which was quite late, and he was issued a yellow. A couple substitutions did not save day for Land de Wood, as Jennifer Vilardi, benefitting from some miscommunication in the opponent’s backfield, made a terrific run. She could have had quite a shot chance herself, put perhaps was a little hesitant after hitting the post earlier. Jenn slid it over to Brett Carlson who finally got that second goal for the Rockets. After the goal, Land de Wood’s fatigue showed more, and they never really mounted much of a comeback threat, and were content on just keeping it a one goal game. Perhaps, this was because they were aware of their goal differential situation. They could be ok losing 2-1, but losing 3-1, they could not allow. That never seemed to affect the Rockets, who were more then happy to oblige and sit back themselves. After all, Newmanistan doesn’t have to worry about a tiebreaker. They won all 3 games, and all 3 by the score of 2-1.

Newmanistan will advance to the quarterfinal, where the opponent will be Sorthern Northland. Hey wait, did someone say Sorthern Northland, as in that team that knocked us out in the Cup of Harmony 33 quarterfinal? You bet. Newmanistan will be looking for revenge. And the Northerners, they will as well. They have a semifinal loss in the 4th Di Bradini Cup to the Rockets to want to avenge. It should be good!

Here is some postgame reaction:

Carson: “Interesting match today. I’m glad we got the win, we really buckled down after they got the first goal. I know from experience that sometimes scoring so early in a match can be not as good of a thing as it seems as it can cause overconfidence. With the way that we completely took control of this match afterwards, I believe that it was our experience that won this game for us. Land de Wood also probably needs to work on their conditioning a little bit. We, honestly, could have won this game 5-1.”

Talcott: “Strong performance by us today. I think them scoring early was our wake up call. From that point, we did almost anything we wanted, and you could see how they were getting frustrated with the way they were heaving up prayers there at the end of the first half.”


LaFave: “Yeah, I was surprised with their approach late in the first half myself. It’s as if they didn’t respect us defenders. We took them up on that and completely shut Bomber down. They have to do more then that if they want to have success at this level.”

Seidler: “They’re a scrappy bunch, but man, they couldn’t last, could they? We really could have poured it on if we wanted too.”

Carlson: “I’m very happy with the win, this is what we wanted to do, and we got the job done. I think a lot of us remember watching our guys eight years ago beat Sorthern Northland in the semifinals, and thus, we really want to do that again, but do it on our clock.”

We are pleased to have an interview with Andrew Wood for you to read:

Larry: Good afternoon, Andrew
Andrew: Good afternoon Larry, good to speak to you as always.
Larry: So how do you feel the group stages have gone?
Andrew: Very well, we got a good win against Krytenia which was important. The draw against Yafor 2 could have gone either way, and to be honest to only lose by one goal against the favourites Newmanistan is not that bad a result.
Larry: Some of the players looked tired in that last game?
Andrew: Well a lot of the younger players have only been playing 5-aside recently until the formation of the new 11-aside league. While a few of the older players, played in the Oxen Cup recently and I would have liked to have given them an extra game to recover but knew we needed to get as good a result as we could here.
Larry: So any news on the tie-breaker situation?
Andrew: No, all the usual things such as points, goal difference, goals scored, head to head all come out level, it is a very unusual situation.
Larry: What do you think should happen?
Andrew: Well that is for the organisers to decide, while our players are feeling a bit fatigued, we would be happy to play a special one-off decider game, or even meet up for a penalty shoot out. Our favoured way would be reverse ranking order, recognising the fact that we are newcomers and allowing us to progress because of that, but we respect the fact Yafor 2 may be a little aggrieved with that.
Larry: The Newmanistan media have criticised the long ball tactics adopted during the last part of the 1st half, any comments?
Andrew: Well we normally do stick to our passing game, but we were struggling to beat them in midfield and so experimented with the long ball especially as they were missing their best defensive header, Taratino. It's not something we will do too often, but it is another option we have to consider at times.
Larry: The Newmanistan media, have also asked for a nickname, any suggestion?
Andrew: Why not the Woodpeckers?
Larry: Hey I think that might catch on. Well Andrew good as always to speak to you and good luck with the tie-breaker decision.
Andrew: Thanks we will just have to wait and see. Goodbye for now.
Larry: Goodbye.

So there we have it Andrew seems quite pleased with how things go and I guess he'll be even more pleased if his team progress once the tie-breaker decision is made. We also have a nickname for the team "the Woodpeckers"

Having read the Candelaria And Marquez response to us picking them up on their error. We do apologise to Southern Northland for calling them South Northland. We have already apologized for the typo involved in the name of the cup. As for decapitalising the A in, standard grammer stages that you do not capitialise minor words in titles such as de and and. However, to keep them happy we will endeavour to remember to dispense with standard grammer and capitialise the A in And.

As for comparing these typos with them getting the tables wrong, after we took the time to print them correctly and to make sure everything added up, we fail to see how any comparision can be made by a simple typo in a report that everyone understands, to getting the tables right at the end of a group stage, where qualifying for the next round could be affected.

Hwang: Holy %$#^! There's something wrong with the world!

Shim: What do you mean?

Hwang: Somehow 3+2=4.

Shim: But that's impossible. This machine can do a lot of stuff, but not that stuff.

Hwang: Look at Group D tables!

Pos Team P W D L GF GA GD Pts
1 Daehanjeiguk 3 2 1 0 8 4 4 7
2 Sorthern Northland 3 1 2 1 7 6 1 4
3 Jeruselem 3 1 1 1 5 5 0 4
4 Lovisa 3 0 0 3 3 8 -5 0

Shin: I'm surprised that you're more willing to become aggravated over something stupid like accounting error than the fact that our team had a 3-3 draw against Sorthern Northland.

Hwang: But it doesn't make sense!

Shim: Hwang, you don't make sense, but I'm not going to rant about it.

Hwang: Speaking of rant, Wang and Shin are being interrogated by the police in Starblaydia. I guess they still think that they're terrorists or something like that.

Shim: We've got to rescue them somehow.

Hwang: We're stuck in a box. How do we rescue someone from a box?

Shim: Press buttons?

=== Interrogation Room ===

*STB Police stare oddly at Wang and Shin*

Wang: I don't like this room.

Shin: Of course, you don't. You should have taken that purple shirt.

Wang: No! I'm not taking a purple shirt! I like my wardrobe!

STB Police: That's enough chuncky. We're waiting for the interrogator to get here, and while we're at it, might as well call the interpreter.

Shin: You should stop talking. They don't like to hear you speak.

Wang: What's wrong with me speaking? I like me.

Shin: They don't.

Wang: Who cares? I still haven't figured out where we're at. Some %$#^ Hwang must hit the buttons again.

Shin: Just shut up and we'll all be fine.

Wang: *sulks* Can I have some water?

STB Police: I don't know what you just said, but the answer is no.

Wang: *sees the shaking of the head* Oh, come on. It's just water.

STB Police: So you want to make a phone call? The answer is still no.

Wang: Water? Please?

STB Police: I don't quite like your attitude. Sit down and wait for the interrogator!

Wang: Geez, you ask for water.

Shin: I don't you, they don't like you.

*Fire alarm*

STB Police: You bastards! You must have blown up something!

Wang: Oh great. Fire alarm.

* Water starts spraying from the ceiling*

Shin: Somehow, this isn't going to end well.

=== Control Room ===

Shim: A fire alarm? That's all you're going to do?

Hwang: Well, you said press one button.

Shim: %$#^ that! I want them back in the Control Box! *sits on panel*

SUPER: There's been a calamity in Candelaria And Marquez! The calculators have stopped working!

Shim: How is that a calamity?

SUPER: I don't know, but it's contributed to poor calculation skills among the engineering elite. Some buildings might crash and fall decades later!

Shim: Okay...

SUPER: What is that thing, a chair? Get off of that thing! It cost us a lot of money!

Shim: Okay. *gets off panel*

SUPER: I want a report on the calculator deficiency in C&M! *leaves*

Shim: Report?

Hwang: If he feels pretty upset, he makes us write reports.

Shim: I'm not paid to write reports.

Hwang: You're not paid to sit on machines either, but you did that without a hustle.

Shim: *grumbles* So what's this report about?

Hwang: I wrote my last report on some book. It was fun!

Shim: A book report?

Hwang: No one ever reads these things, and if they do, they'll know that I did a great job on my report!

Shim: I have a feeling that's not the kind of report they are expecting, but as long as it's easier...

Wang: *soaked* What the %$#^ is going on here?

Shim: *runs to hug him* Eww! You're wet!

Wang: I got a shower before coming back. Where's Shin?

Shin: *soaked* I'm right here. *whacks Hwang* Why'd you press the %$#^ buttons?

Hwang: Why'd you hit me? Shim hit the buttons!

Wang: Stop blaming her! You're the only one who does stuff like this!

Shin: I want to know why I'm soaking wet too!

Hwang: Well... I did cause that one, but Shim hit the buttons that made you go to Starblaydia. Of course, she also brought you back...

Shin: *whacks Hwang* Look at my hair! It's ruined! Ruined!

Hwang: It looks fine to me...

Shim: Let's get you some change... *takes Wang outside*

Shin: I want you to write a report and put it on my desk tomorrow!

Hwang: What report?

Shin: The report that I'm going to submit to the Supervisor! You're totally inept and can't handle any responsibilities around here!

Hwang: But...

Shin: *whacks Hwang* No buts!

Hwang: I thought you'd like the shower!

Shin: Not in a %$#^ police station! By the way, how did the little ones do today?

Hwang: Umm... they drew?

Shin *starts whacking Hwang* It's all because you buzzed me to Starblaydia, you ingrate! All because you buzzed me to Starblaydia!

Hwang: *in between whackings* Hmm, that sounds like great lyrics!

Shin: Oh, you're a genius! *starts to kiss Hwang*

Wang: *returning in dry clothes with Shim* Did we miss something?

well were out again. If i were the hosts i just make it all 16 teams make it knockouts drew by finishes in group. 1 plays 4 and so on. Then the champs play, or a full 16 team knockout draw best vs worse. But that would only be so i would get out of the first round for the first time since the first Cup.

http://www.thedailynews.cam/sport/
SPORT – Soccer – Rugby Union – Cricket – Field Hockey – ASS – Tennis – Sailing – Olympics – More C&M – Global Sport – Sports Politics – Opinion
Saturday July 26 2008
<To HOME>
Most Read: Net restrictions ‘to remain in place’ post-12/5
‘Extreme heat’ caused liquid crystal ‘meltdown’
Denie predicts rapid end to Switzish crisis
So wrong? Hannah Wisnieski on her tempestuous relationship with her father

SPORT

Sports Politics

Boffins blame record temperatures for LCD failures As the Candelarias swelter in the seventies, causing traffic chaos and a collapse in wool imports to the mainland threatening the economic stability of Cabrera Island, one mystery at least has been solved – the malfunctioning of ten of thousands of pocket calculators. A team at Albrecht University led by Prof. Nick Patel confirmed early this evening that it was “beyond certain” that the unseasonable warmth had caused the liquid crystals contained within the portable calculation devices’ displays to enter their anisotropic phases, and therefore exhibit a greater risk of displaying incorrectly. Manufacturers have stopped short of a mass recall, claiming that such an instance would not be covered by purchasers’ warranties, despite the potential long-term damage to <more>

Farrelly to face War Crimes Tribunal The editor of the CAMAFA’s official website, Ray Farrelly, has been taken into protective custody following a series of death threats against his person. Though the governing body of C&M football has refused to condemn his actions, particularly in the light of the recent revelations regarding the reliability of the nation’s calculators; Farrelly has come under fire from Northlandish and Han interest groups, and the Church of His Sacred Seed, in his native Albrecht for blatant discrimination against their communities. Events have taken a twist in recent hours however, after public prosecutors in C&M threatened to have Farrelly sent to Scra-Ven, Wigu, to face the Rushmori Court of Unspeakable Offences, having caused ‘irrevocable damage’ to the reputation of Candelariasian mathematical standards, and severely hurt the country’s hopes of <more>

Opinion: “No Comparison?” Naïve deWoodians ignore historical precedent, writes Tanya Robinson, Columnist of the Year (1998) How can the unfortunate but ultimately inconsequential mislabelling of two groups, in a minor footer competition, on a minor website, possibly compare to a series of indolent name-based slurs – of a quite possibly racialist nature – against sovereign nations, we must ask ourselves. The Land de Wood News has leapt to become the sixth-most requested overseas newspaper in the Candelarias this weekend, behind only the Daily Turk, Aeropag Tribune, L’Internationale, Chi Sun-Times-Tribune-Domestic-International-Echo-Star-News-Today, New Rappahannock Planet and, of course, Taeshan Times, presumably on the basis that the Candelariasian people are not unfairly distrustful of the current consensus in the C&M press over this row. Their suspicions are misguided however – for these sporting newcomers have a long and regrettable history of such barren understanding for the sensibilities of their fellow men, and – dare we say it out loud, in this PC age? – retain laughably low standards of personal hygiene and <more>

CMSC Round Thirty

McDonald SC given huge survival boost As the fallout from Albrecht FC’s derby day defeat to the champions-elect continues; McDonald SC have won the evening game to join Radyukevich on thirty-six points. Midfielder Sancha Wasilew hit the decisive goal in a bad-tempered affair at Wallpark Road, Abiodun, to leave the XXII champions stranded at the bottom of the table and draw the Jukos further into the relegation race, following their own embarrassing home defeat to MN Smith. Cathedral City meanwhile are back into the top four with a two-goal victory in Rose of Sharon, while in the CMSC2 Albrecht Independent are a point away from securing a debut season in the top-flight, but the distracting of the Cup could cost Robert Kilroy’s Ironside, with <more>

International Soccer

Small Blues survive scares to return to Quarters Trevor Organ’s Small Blues have secured their place in quarter-finals of the Di Bradini with a 3-2 victory of the Blouman Empire, and the best figures from the group stage, despite the potential of a real wobble against Bloumany. Though the Empire would have required a large scoreline over C&M, with the Eesseff all-but guaranteed victory over a poor Ameriganistani outfit, Organ’s men – and woman – were still a goal down as half-time approached, before Abdul Ibadulla’s fourth and fifth of the tournament either side of the forty-five put C&M in front. With James Falconer adding the third, the Blues could have cruised but instead gave up a late goal and struggled to hold on. Three-two proved enough however, and the team will continue the CMSC representation in the DBC this year, after the Han side of Caires Sports striker Kim Mihyeon won Group D. The fate of his club team-mate Ahershk Valinial and his Yafor 2 side remains <more>

Opinion: Our Ladies of Candelaria (and Marquez) do C&M sports proud, writes Melvin Bean That they’ll be up against it throughout is not question, for the COCACAMO has set their squad a realistic challenge of two medals in Columbia, but these upcoming games could yet make national heroines of Victoria Aragón, Ekah Dikko, Penny Enomoto, Daisy Mah, Jenni Smith, Pearce Pedotti, Beth Petch and more, never mind the legendary Hannah Wisnieski. But, if the open roads of Bedistan, the badminton court and the uneven horse are destined to remain niche arenas of sporting success, the football pitch may yet provide the breakthrough that the Candelarias’ female sportsfolk need. Though Lelliot-Leigh Sodje has yet to see action, and Georgina Plowman has gotten barely five minutes, the presence of Peppi Elduayén in goal is now utterly unquestioned, following <more>

Olympics

<50 Candelariasians to Watch in Columbia No. 37: Dean Comley, Bantamweight Boxing>

<50 Stars to Watch in Columbia No. 37: Maureen Couture, Middle-Distance, Secristan>

Cricket

<Arrigo stun Vo by eight wickets, but Zapata v Alvery is washout>

<More Sport Headlines>

We have recently received complaints from Candelaria And Marquez media about us wrongfully not capitalising the A in And. However, it appears even their media cannot get it right We quote from no less than the daily news website.

Opinion: Our Ladies of Candelaria (and Marquez) do C&M sports proud, writes Melvin Bean

If their own media cannot capitialise the A in And then what do they expect from us who have to glean most of our information from their paper.

THE FOOTBALL DIARY
Your new option of Sports Magazine - daily!
Just V$1,00 - ten pages of daily football news!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------

TEAM DEFEATS HOSTS AND CLINCHES GROUP WIN

After defeating Kansiov and having an unpleasant draw against Taeshan, the Monopolists had to face the hosts in the third game of this group stage of the Di Bradini Cup. There was still reason for worries, as a loss could put the team out of the competition. So, the players were ready for a fierce battle inside the field. But the battle didn't happen with violence. It happen with quality football. Both teams had a good performance and excited the supporters with nice moves and efficient plays. In the end, Cafundéu was more efficient, as the team was able to take more advantage of the opportunities that appeared during the game than its opponents, and won the game by the result of 3x1.

Having the help of its supporters, Starblaydia tried to take the control of the game but the real strength of the purple team seemed to be in the attack, while Cafundéu has an excellent midfield. And the Monopolists' strategy, commanded by the coach David Nefasto, was to dominate the midfield, cutting the supply for the dangerous attack of the hosts, which could decide the game with just a single opportunity. The strategy didn't work perfectly, but worked well, and soon Cafundéu was the team with more goal opportunities, controlling the ball possession in the midfield. This control resulted in the first game, scored by Ilmari after an individual play, when the Cafundelense dribbled two players before shooting.

Starblaydia, still with difficulties to pierce in the Cafundelense defence, tried to overcome these problems to reach the goal. Long ranged shots, long crossing, fast exchange of passings, they tried to reach the area with many different moves, being successful some time, but not enough to score. The goal only came after a defensive mistake. Japa lost the ball in the defence, Albertini took it, invaded the area and shot to score. Two minutes later, Fabinho replied with a wonderful long ranged shot which sent the ball directly to the goal. In the second half, Cafundéu continued more efficient, and guaranteed the victory with a goal scored by Alves, who received a pass from Serrano and shot to Wilson's goal.

CAFUNDÉU 3x1 STARBLAYDIA

Referee: Darren Sheffield (Candelaria And Marquez).
MOTM: Fabinho (Cafundéu).

CAFUNDÉU: Peru; Rogério, Ivan (Zé Luiz 74'), Japa and Nunes; Fabinho, Serrano and Ilmari (Jules 74'); Matoso, Nando (Marques 45') and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

STARBLAYDIA: Wilson; Movalinen, Gavelli, Samba and Sverus; Petropoulos, England (Bazrimar 60') and Na-Me (Mus'haf 72'); Thayil (Primo 45'), Di Bradini and Albertini.
Coach: Apollina Iakovakis.

Goals:CAF: Ilmari 22' , Fabinho 45'+ , Alves 78'.
STB: Albertini 43'.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – formation for the game against whoever it'll be: Peru; Rogério, Ivan, Japa and Nunes; Fabinho, Serrano and Ilmari; Matoso, Nando and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

Match’s Referee: Kevin Miller (Newmanistan).

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC Goalscorers:

3- Alves
1- Serrano, Matoso, Fabinho, Ilmari

Chelmar Times >>> Sports >>> Football/Soccer >>> Opinion >>> Velastros July 26

Interesting times down in Starblaydia

I've never been much of a fan of under-21 football/soccer, to be honest. I always found myself cursing at the pure ineptitude displayed by the young stars, trying to emulate their older, and far more skilled, countrymen. I can honestly say, though, that the recent crop of under-21 teams are far better than many of the teams of the past and, though I might be exaggerating a bit, these teams are really quite good. Might even be international level (and, guess what? Many of these players do play internationally). I've been surprised by the level of competition down in Starblaydia, the excitement of matches down in Starblaydia, and I've happened to have found myself riveted by football/soccer that is of a level that I used to play at.

Let's be honest here - the Yaforite under-21 tradition really isn't very strong. Part of this is simply the mindset that Yaforite under-21 coaches and players have had in the past. When I was that age, the under-21 World Cup (the successor tournament now being the Di Bradini Cup) was seen by Yaforite players, coaches, and commentators as a warm-up tournament, a tournament to get young players acclimated to international football, to get good talents some playing time. If anything, it was less about competition and more about training and, to be honest, that's the main reason Yaforite under-21-level teams never really did well on this stage. That's not to say that there's anything wrong with this kind of mindset - sides like Candelaria And Marquez and Newmanistan really don't have much of a World Cup tradition, while we've, most recently, become a quarterfinalist. Probably will do even better some time soon.

Our mindset is changing a bit, though. Isilvarnon Moraedenshar, one of the members of a very old defensive Yaforite sporting tradition played a lot more attacking(ly?) against against Krytenia - dropping his club star Ahor Kalinkir and playing center midfielder Amhertus Civarnu, instead, dropping both wingbacks, Ahagarishk Va'ask and Ahagorsk Hilvantir and playing their backups, Vagor Vincarel and Jahakin Daans, respectively, instead. If anything, that jolt is exactly what the team needed, and what historical Yaforite coaches would not have done. There is no doubt that Hilvantir has far more potential as a player than Daans does and, thus, old Yaforite coaches would have played him because he could be better in the future. Moraedenshar embraced a win-now mentality. And, guess what? We won, now.

That's not to say that these decisions were not intelligent and tactical as well, though. Much of the problem with our Di Bradini Cup team has been their midfield, and our center midfield, to be precise. Much of that has come from Atoras Riegan playing as a center midfielder, when he is a tailor-made defensive midfielder. It's much like the problem Chelmar FC (my old club, obviously) faced when placing Mosada Juhan in a center midfield position when he is basically the perfect defensive midfielder (I'm exaggerating a bit, but you get the idea). Civarnu played the foil of the passing center midfielder, allowing our team to spread the ball and making full use of the, surprising, strengths of this team. That lead to the two goals, and a whole host of misses by Danilo Silva, who seems rather out of position as a striker. Which suggests an interesting solution to the problem.

Moraedenshar might just take that solution - the move to a 5-4-1 diamond, playing Danilo Silva as an attacking midfielder, Atoras Riegan as a defensive midfielder, and still keeping the five defenders that works best. Silva is an excellent attacking midfielder, as he showed at the age of fifteen, some world cups back. He's a very skilled dribbler, has a lot of game vision, and lots of maturity beyond his years. His quite good at that. Similarly, Riegan reminds me a lot of a young Mosada Juhan - he has the power in his body to make an excellent defensive midfielder, strength, and marking ability. His stamina and quickness mark him as somewhat different from his brother (and I don't know how anyone can follow Yaforite football/soccer and not know his brother. Shame on you if you do not! In fact, you don't deserve to be a fan if you don't!).

Best of all, this formation would allow the Yaforites to utilize the positions that seem to be the best - strangely, the wings. That's good, because it has been a long time since a Yaforite team had good wingers. Amario Otavias may just be the best left winger ever to don a Yaforite uniform and Ahershk Valinial has blossomed in Caires. Yes, blossomed. He's become a spark-plug in a Caires Sports Club team that has a ton of youth, as well as support in the Grand Democratic Duchy (don't you just love the politics of international sport?). If anything, they've been the real forces behind every single one of the goals by our Di Bradini Cup team (two crosses accounted for a pair of goals against Krytenia). Them and the fact that we seem to have a striker who can score (at last!), in Jamie Durand. Two goals against the Krytenia under-21 team and four goals in three games is nothing to laugh at.

Incidentally, anyone find it slightly humorous that the one Yaforite-descended foreign player known at all (Caires Sports' Robbie Sinjinir) is a striker and goalscorer? We can't find any good strikers at home, yet we seem to make one abroad.

The writer is a former Yaforite international, Cup of Harmony finalist and winner, and former Cafundelense league player.

[OOC: Ending is sort of bad, but I have to run and wanted to have [U]something[U] up.]

KNOW YOUR ROCKETS: James Seidler, MID, Springfield Thoroughbreds
#4 of ?? in a series

Many documentaries tell a story of an athlete overcoming a major hardship early in their life, to where it brings a tear to the eye of the more emotional person to know that despite those struggles, they were able to make it into the big time. Or perhaps, one will document how the player’s rise was a bit unexpected to get to glory. The story of James Seidler isn’t the type that’s going to bring anyone to tears, but it could help the fans appreciate exactly why he is how he is, nonetheless.

You see, James Seidler was always an aggressive kid going up. Early in his youth he was, without a doubt, the schoolyard bully. Looking like a fourth or a fifth grader when he was just in first grade, he had an intimidating stature to the other kids, and he knew it, and he enjoyed it. James never had to bother bringing a lunch to school, as he always found a way to steal it off of someone else. And the kid he stole it from tried to say something, Seidler would make him pay for say something with a butt kicking. He started to get such a reputation around the school, that some kids took him up an offer to “pay him” a certain amount of money each month for the privilege of not beating them up. Other kids sided with Seidler, and as he got older he was, your prototypical bully. Eventually, the parents of some other kids got word of what he was doing, and pressured the school to do something about it. You see, even the school was intimidated to take action even though they were well aware with it. Not because of James, but because of his parents, Matt and Jennifer Seidler, who were multi-millionaires and made several donations to the school district for many years. “It was escalating out of control,” recalls then-principal Joe Spinnell, “Not only was this kid a danger to several students, when he smacked a teacher across the face in second grade, we knew we had to do something, and fast. I couldn’t expel him though.” Christina Jackson, the second grade teacher that was smacked across the face didn’t want him expelled either, “When I got into teaching these were the kids I wanted to make a difference with. No offense, but any teacher can teach a kid that wants to learn. A good teacher can teach a kid who doesn’t. That’s what I wanted to do. I would not allow James to be expelled. He wasn’t a bad kid, he just had severe anger issues.” Spinnell then recommended anger management for their young son. Mother Jennifer Seidler disagreed, but lied to the school, “They had the nerve to say James needed anger management. It’s not our fault that those kids he was beating up couldn’t fight. We told the school we would, but we never did. We had another plan.” That plan? Football!

“Instead of boring anger management therapy, we wanted James to use his aggression skills for good. He always loved watching football on TV, and he enjoyed watching Brett Prescott. When we signed up he told me, dad, I want to be just like Brett Prescott.” But to be like Brett would mean more then just being rough and aggressive, because what made Prescott so unique is that he was an extremely physical player, a shutdown midfielder, and an intimidating force. At the same though, he was always, or usually, smart about it. In his first year of youth football in their suburb of Pocono City, the coaches were not really too thrilled with the way that Seidler constantly was rough with the other kids, and downright infuriated the other parents. “They didn’t like it very much but it was just so much fun. It was something I enjoyed then more then pushing kids around in school.” James Seidler reflects. That’s when, at eight, Seidler attended a Pocono City youth camp that ran for two weeks held by Brian Carson. “After the first day of the camp, Brian asked me, what the hell I was doing, and I told him I was playing football and tackling people.” says Seidler. Carson, disagreed, “I told James then that you’re not playing football. You’re being a thug. He needed to work on a lot more then just being physical. I dismissed him from camp, and told him to come back in two years and if he showed more football skills, that I think I could develop him into a great player.” James didn’t quite believe it, but his parents did. For the next two years, they forced their son to play the game the right way, and the results began to come, and show quickly. “We noticed how good his vision really was, and that he had a pretty good shot too. The problem was getting James to focus on that, and less with the whole macho kid stuff,” said coach Pete Rillen. James improved his focus, but as the school feared, he took those aggressive urges back out on the less popular schoolkids. He was older now, and the beatings he was inflicting were becoming more serious. He nearly got expelled twice, but timely donations to the school district by mother Jennifer kept him in.

He went back to Carson’s camp, but four years later, not two. Carson nearly gave up on him, but when he was back at 12, James displayed outstanding ability. Brian was a believer then, “I told him that he had a bright future now, and to stick with it, and perhaps Pocono City will sign you.” Early in his high school career, James was Mr. Popular, but fought off the distractions enough to still be a good prospect. Carson was thinking about offering a contract, but in swooped the Springfield Thoroughbreds, and Seidler signed at 15. In his first two seasons in Springfield, James toned it down and began to be much more smart about his timing on the rough play. He is still an intimidating force, and he still loves it very much. It all came full circle when Seidler was asked to become part of the Di Bradini team. “It was (expletive) sweet. All those damn teachers my whole life saying I couldn’t make a living pushing people around have been proven wrong. I hope they enjoy watching me in Starblaydia.”, Seidler stated. Watching him has been so far, and he should have a great career. Yes, unlike those movie plotlines where the geek always wins, well, sometimes, the bully wins too.

It had been just a mere two days since the weird experience that Dealsin Nicold had outside his house. He believed, no, he knew that he had been approached by Elune to be a tool in her designs for the destiny she promised the new High Priestess. It did not matter that he did not understand why he was chosen or what he could possibly do to make an impact, but that fact remained that he was going to try. So he found himself riding the ferry to the port of Rinaldi, and from there on he would continue on his bycicle on the way to the Raynor mansion in the southwest part of Raynor City herself. He tried to dress as nice as he could, while still being comfortable and able to present himself to the Great Leader after the fifteen mile bike ride, yet his hair was completely messed up and he had somehow managed to get a splash of mud on the back of his pants' leg when he got off to dust himself off.

After taking a few breaths and rehearsing what he was going to say, he hit the speaker button at the gate and awaited one of the many guards to speak through the intercom.

"State your name and business with the Great Leader Tobias Raynor please."

"Dealsin Nicold and I come on urgent news that can only be discussed between the Patriarch and myself."

"Nicold did you say? You're not the blacksmith who provides us our arms are you?"

"I am him, and I come with pressing matters for the young Raynor master."

"Very well, I will inform Tobias that you have arrived. You're name is on a list of people allowed inside the mansion, and a lucky thing to, as we've been having several people the last few weeks coming and asking for an audience with the Great Leader without an appointment. They all have been mumbling something about the end of the country and the destruction of our faith, pests if you ask me. But as you have pressing matters, I shall not keep you waiting any longer with this foolish gossip."

As the green coated gate parted and Dealsin made his way through the small pathway to the illustrious mansion, he could not help but lose his breath. He had been inside the mansion twice before, each for a special delivery for the Raynors, and each time he was always left in awe at how beautiful and well cared for the mansion and grounds were. Nestling his bike next to the white stoned stairs, he made his way up and was pleased to see that the doors were opened for him, with the young leader waiting to greet him in person.

"Dealsin, it's been far too long since you have graced our halls. I do hope that you have come for some pleasure as well as business, as Sakyrian has already informed me that you have "pressing" matters to attend to. Also, while you are here, one of the new guards damaged the hilt on his blade during a lesson, and I would be most appreciative if you managed to repair it."

"Well if I happen to have the time I might look into it, but alas I am here on personal matters of the deepest kind. I bring tidings that may prove ill, but must only be heard by your eyes, to best not cause any unneeded panic. Perhaps it would best be served for such conditions if we were to have our meeting in one of your offices?"

The joyful expression that had been on Tobias' face quickly transformed into a look of cautionary concern. It was never Nicold's way to bring news in person, he far too enjoyed his home out on the island for that, preferring to send it through letter. And then to request that their conversation be made private as well gave Tobias pause. Things were just beginning to fall back into place for him and the entire country, and the last thing he wanted was another round of unfortunate news. Never the less, he was bound to his position to hear whatever tidings the blacksmith brought, for good or ill.

"If it is that important, then I think I shall grant your request. I was just working on the one on this floor, we shall use that one if you don't mind. I even have my dinner there, and enough to share if you so desire it."

Nicold shook his head nay and Tobias gave a small frown, but lead his companion into the office, dismissing the two guards that were following them. After closing the door and shutting the blinds, Tobias took the seat behind his large mahogany desk and motioned with his right hand for Nicold to begin.

"Well sir, it's about you and your wife..."

Group D
Jeruselem (2-0)
Sorthern Northland (3-3)
Lovisa (3-1)

The Boring Edition

Well, despite the 3-3 draw to Sorthern Northland, the Han progress to the quarterfinals in the DBC6 on top of the group. Sorthern Northland have the chance to do one better than their 4th place finish in the 4th DBC, while the Han have the chance to exhibit some skill against their next opponent, which seems to be a long way off, concerning the lack of media coverage by Starbladyii News Services governing the scores, tables, and schedule. Not a problem! It seems that we won't be playing the formidable Rockets of Newmanistan, the rising stars of Cafundéu, and perennial nightmares of Candelaria And Marquez (anyone seen what their country looks and smells like?). Of course, there isn't a likely rematch to Sorthern Northland, but there is the possibly we'll take on Starblaydia again (for the 4th Cup in a row!), Valanora (not for the 4th time in a row, but this would be our 3rd Cup meeting), and another rising Land de Wood. They're all dangerous foes, but with Coach Yu's charges in fit form, there's little chance for anyone to make a serious upset (unless they actually do).

The Promiscuous Edition

Looking for pleasure? Call 1-555-5555-55 for more information!

The Opera Edition

*Die Walküre music*

This is the song that never ends,
As it goes on and on my friend!
Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was,
And they'll continue singing it forever just because...

This is the song that never ends,
As it goes on and on my friend!
Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was,
And they'll continue singing it forever just because...

This is the song that never ends,
As it goes on and on my friend!
Some people started singing it, not knowing what it was,
And they'll continue singing it forever just because...

The Moral of the Story Edition

Thank God the Singing Beans were not singing that song at their incarnation.

http://www.thedailynews.cam/feedback/correctionsandclarifications.shtml
Corrections and Clarifications
In an article published in the Daily News Sports section on the twenty-sixth of July 2008, under the headline, “No comparison?”, columnist Tanya Robinson described the people of Land de Wood as a “smelly race” and “a bunch of basket weavers” with “an unhealthy attitude towards inbreeding”. Following a number of complaints, a thorough investigation has concluded that there is no relevant data supporting such accusations, and Ms. Robinson has offered a full apology.

Following an article published in the Daily News Sports section on the twenty-sixth of July 2008, under the headline “Our Ladies of Candelaria (and Marquez) do C&M sports proud”, we wish to clarify to concerned readers that columnist Melvin Bean was using a frankly rather witty allusion to Our Lady of Candelaria, or Nuestra Señora de la Candelaria, the apparition of the Virgin Mary and depiction thereof popularly known as the Black Madonna and still to this day venerated in parts of Marquez. In this reference, Marquez was included in the headline as a separate entity; not as part of the single nation of Candelaria And Marquez. We wish to stress that, as always, the greatest care was taken not to cause offence to the people of Marquez on this difficult matter.

_______________


Vecchio, Starblaydia


Hours ago…


Arthur Wangen was feeling uniquely useless. Nobody had known anything about Ameriganistan, granted, but once you’d got used to their eleven’s eerily similar playing styles, they were push-overs. The elv… the elfi… the elve… the Vanorians had been far the more difficult prospect, but the Scott Soldarians, Espy va Drakes, Loren Meyers and Morgan Banzes of the CMSC had been bullied for information by their (much) younger Candelariasian club colleagues sufficiently to give C&M the upper hand on the knowledge front.

Against the Blouman Empire, all eyes had turned to Arthur. The two Cities of the CMSC – Caires and Cathedral – both possessed a Blouman presence, but no-one in the Small Blues squad. But that mattered little, surely, when they had a bona fide Blouman-based player in the first team?

He’d tried to explain; but his team-mates had failed to grasp fully the enormity of the Empire, with all its separate countries and leagues. Arthur’s Northpoint Sealions met most of these opponents only very occasionally and the right-back barely knew any of them by name, never mind their abilities. C&M had gone a goal down early on, and it had been entirely Arthur’s fault, and the poor soft lad would never forget the looks of pure venom meted out upon him by his international team-mates. It had been the first they’d conceded all tournament. As it turned out, it didn’t make a blind bit of difference – Abdul and Tom had simply been too good for the anonymous Bloumany backline – but with a game against the hosts now on the cards, the Small Blues couldn’t afford to show any weaknesses. It was a deeply unhappy thing, being your country’s Achilles' heel.

With the clock down winding down, Tom Smith had long since left the field of play and Trevor Organ was preparing to chuck on another striker or two. At three-one they could afford it, and any minutes on the pitch the other three forwards could muster for themselves could prove invaluable. All that mattered for this minute was knocking the ball about until it went out of play, and the changes could be made. Arthur received it from Hansson Kemp and dribbled forward until…

Until something in the crowd caught his attention. It was only fleeting, and the sudden rush of memories left his brain almost as soon as they’d made themselves known. But he was left with a crooked thorn of fear, jammed into his forehead and coursing through his body. He was alone, aged eighteen, out on the endless moors of west Candelaria, clutching a broken leg, in the darkness. Gordon, his favourite horse, had long since bolted. He’d always planned that this would be his last trot around his favourite haunt, before he travelled back east and left for Northpoint. Being his last trip anywhere, ever, hadn’t been part of the plan.

He’d woken up a day later. His leg had been fine, and he’d passed his medical at the Sealions with flying colours. He’d been left only with the memories of a night that probably never even happened, and eight whispered words.

“No fancy shit, just pass it to Niv.”

Suddenly, the airs cleared, and the Albrecht Turkish winger was waiting patiently for the ball. Arthur did what he’d been told, months before.

The ball hit Niv Cohen’s shin and bounced away. The two stared at it vaguely for a moment, before a quick-thinking Blouman midfield ran onto it and powered forwards. Caught off-guard, Hansson Kemp was simply not good enough a defender yet to cope with it, and even Peppi Elduayén couldn’t bend far enough to stop the shot reaching the top corner.

It was Arthur’s turn to glare at his colleague; but Niv merely shrugged, shook his head, and stared into the stands.

***

On the other side of the pitch, Trevor Organ shook his head too and waved towards Richard Arnold and Lelliot-Leigh Sodje.

“Sorry kids, sit yerselves back down… I’m not risking anything at three-two. Hugo! You’re back up, get yourself stripped!”

He plonked himself heavily back down between Kieron Tomlinson and David Stone.

“Hm?” he muttered at his assistant.

“What, Trev?”

“How did you mean I’ll ‘pay for that’, Dave?”

“I didn’t say anything, Trev.”

“Oh.”

“Mm.”

Some unsettling music followed, to make up for the limp close to this conversation.

Jay was watching TV at home after the Jeruselem came home from Starblaydia since the team didn't make the quarterfinals, not that they were really expected to. Dr Who was on and it was the one he always wanted to watch ... the one with Princess Marie-Antoinette Dallas.

...

Queen Sheba, Doctor Who and companion was running from Cybermen. They ended up in the middle of a football stadium.

Companion: We're doomed, we're totally surrounded!
Dr Who: This isn't a fair football game, three against a few hundred.
Marie: Yes, this isn't the most fair game I've ever played either. The other side don't seem to be respecting the rules either, look they've ripped out the goal posts.
Companion: You two have any ideas? We're going to die!

Marie: I don't suppose you two are any good at football?
Companion: Football? How is that going to help?
Dr Who: I see what she's thinking.
Marie: I need to reprogram this football, into cheat mode. I want to borrow that thingy of yours

<Queen Sheba zaps a football a few times>

Dr Who: You've used a sonic screwdriver before I see.
Marie: I'm a clone of one your distant children. I don't know where the original is, but I'm a clone ... most of this planet are cloned humans.
Dr Who: Well girl, hurry up. We're not getting any further from them.
Marie: All good things take time, hang on.

Companion: She's a bit like you.
Dr Who: Yes, good thing.
Marie: Time to kick some cyber ass!

Queen Sheba with her gravity football boots, kicks the "cyber football" a metallic ball with self-propelling internal engine which simulates a real football. The ball spins and whirls around the place knocking off into the heads of the cybermen.

Companion: That's a football?
Dr Who: Yes, it works quite well there too. The Queen seems to be pretty good at football.
Marie: There's nothing else to do around here.
Dr Who: I think the battery on your football is going flat.

Marie: Trust me to grab one with flat battery. Too many of bloody metal idiots left. Crap, it's flat.
Companion: They're still coming at us.
Dr Who: Those gravity boots? What happens it one explodes?
Marie: Oh, they aren't that powerful. They don't lift one off the ground much, but they fry unshielded electronics real well if they explode.

Dr Who: Right, let's make a bomb of those two boots.
Marie: Hurry up ...

Queen Sheba hits a cyberman with the ball to keep the Dr Who away from harm.

Dr Who: OK, I've overloaded the power supply and turned off the circuit protection. Here goes, or we're dead (throws boots in their air)

Everyone ducks. As the two boots explode sending out deadly EMF, the Cybermen short circuit and crash.

Companion: Look, we've done it.
Dr Who: It's not over yet, we must get to the Mother ship.
Marie: What's that look like? I saw some stupid looking thing from the beach.
Dr Who: We'll need some of these footballs. I have a plan.

Marie: Play the World Cup in their spaceship?
Dr who: Close enough.
Marie: Well, with their lack of football prowess I'm ready to win this war. Let's go.

Location: A government building somewhere in Sorthern Northland
Time: Approximately 08:42
Present: James Matthews and his secretary Rosheen Dubh.
Preferred choice of biscuit: Custard Cream

*Matthews walks into the office.

Matthews: "Ah, good morning Rosheen, and I see we have some custard creams today! How delightful."

Dubh: "Morning Sir, they were buy five get one free and I know how much you like them so I though why not."

Matthews: "Ah excellent choice Rosheen, much better than that horrible shortbread you always buy."

Dubh: "I like shortbread!"

Matthews: "Yes, always had strong taste didn't you? Anyway can't spend all day discussing the finer points of biscuits. Well we could but then what would I talk about at the Biscuit Appreciation Society tonight? You know you should come along, might learn something."

Dubh: "Thanks but no thanks, it isn't quite my scene to be honest."

Matthews: "Well I do try, anyway has the post arrived yet?"

Dubh: "Yep just this package. Oh and a load of final reminders but I threw them out like you said."

Matthews: "Good girl, now then what's this? Oooo a DVD. Better get the popcorn out then!"

Matthews passes the DVD over to Dubh who puts the DVD in the DVD player (no shit!?). He then settles into a chair with a bucket of popcorn and the custard creams.

Meanwhile the DVD starts. The first shot is a panoramic view taken from a boat. In the foreground, a sandy beach with turquoise waters lapping it's edge. Behind the beach a picturesque seaside town. Around the town there is mile upon mile of green countryside, while behind the town is a small mountain. Then the camera pans up as if not on a boat but in a helicopter. The aerial view shows the town is on an island, an island which the camera then pans across. Accompanying the visual aspect is a song that Matthews is singing along to.

Matthews: "Oh Danny Boy, the pipes, the pipes are calling, From glen to glen, and down the mountainside."

Dubh: "Don't give up the day job sir."

Matthews: "Ha! It is a beautiful song though isn't it?"

Dubh: "It can be. You obviously need someone who can sing for it to be good."

Matthews: "Yes, well we better concentrate on this film. No letter saying what it was or anything."

As the pair turned their attention back to the screen and with the last verse of Danny Boy being sung, the camera stopped panning across the island and now in view was a flagpole. It panned upwards to the flag flying at the top of the mast. It was a flag with an orange background, a red saltire the cross of St. Patrick and on top of that a green flag.

Matthews: "Aha! Inisnadún. Lovely place."

It was indeed the flag of Inisnadún, the large island to the south-west of Sorthern Northland's mainland and one of the many counties of Sorthern Northland. A number of the islanders though never considered themselves Sorthern, they were from Inisnadún and not Sorthern Northland. Despite this how they had never made any fuss about being part of Sorthern Northland, no protests, no uprisings, no calls for independence. This though was soon to change.

Having shown the countryside of Inisnadún, the film now switched to a dark room. On the back wall there was once again, the flag of Inisnadún. Directly in front of the camera was what appeared to be a hostage. Sat on a chair with his legs tied together and with his hands behind his back and tied together to the chair and with a bag covering his head. To either side stood a masked man, each holding a rifle. Matthews and Dubh looked at each other, this was certainly nice film about Inisnadún's countryside. Then another man appeared, also masked but unlike his two comrades, without a gun. He walked behind captive, untying his hands, and then thrusting a piece of papers into the captives hands. Through his balaclava a smile could be spotted as he whipped the bag off the captives head to reveal his identity. It was none other than Bryn Evans, himself a Inisnadún local. The Sorthern Northland U21's football team boss took a moment to gather his senses. He looked to either side, and noting the two burly men with guns either side of him decided it was best to read the piece of paper he'd been handed.

"Sorthern Northland and the world... the men who have bought me here represent Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún. These men bravely fight for the freedom of the peoples of Inisnadún and for it's rightful establishment as a free and independent nation. However the Sorthern government has through various campaigns of terror against Inishnadún's peoples and through the mass displacement of it's peoples quashed the movement for freedom. Of those they leave behind such as these men, those who speak openly of their desire for a free Inishnadún state risk sudden disappearance. Many such men and women have vanished without a trace at the hands of the Sorthern government and armed forces. These noble people who are willing to fight for freedom are sent to concentration camps in the Northern Wastes where they are systematically killed off. So far Inisnadún has waited quietly in the hope that someday the Sorthern invaders may leave our homeland, that some day the massacre will stop, but now they will wait no longer. The only option for them now is to engage in armed combat with Sorthern Northland and use guerilla tactics to win freedom. As a demonstration of what they are capable of, a bomb will be detonated in the stands at Sorthern Northland's Di Bradini Cup, a number of other bombs will also be detonated around Sorthern Northland. The explosions tonight will be only a taste of the kind of thing Sorthern Northland, and other nations who aide Sorthern Northland's occupation of Inisnadún in any way can expect to face in the coming days, months and years unless the freedom of Inisnadún in granted."

As if to signal the end of the speech one of the two men guarding Evans propels the butt of his rifle into the face of Evans knocking him unconscious. The video then ends with Danny Boy once again being played over an image of the Inisnadún flag flapping in the breeze.

Matthews: "My God! This is terrible!"

Dubh: "Shouldn't we do something?"

Matthews: "Yes we should. I'm going straight down there to sort this out."

Dubh: "Eh?"

Matthews: "These custard creams are a month out of date!"

Dubh: "Er Sir? What about Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún?"

Matthews: "What? Who?"

Dubh: "That video we just saw, they've kidnapped Bryn Evans and are threatening to detonate a bomb at the Di Bradini Cup tonight and attack various other targets both here and abroad."

Matthews: "Oh. Right, well that does put us in a bit of a situation doesn't it? Well I guess we better give the video to the intelligence agencies, see if they can get a location on those guys and free Evans, and it would probably be a good idea to let the Starblaydi security services know about the possibility of a bomb, wouldn't it?"

Dubh: "Yes that would seem the sensible option rather than not doing anything."

Group A P W D L GF GA GD Pts
Cafundéu 3 2 1 0 7 3 4 7
Starblaydia 3 2 0 1 4 3 1 6
Taeshan 3 1 1 1 3 3 0 4
Kansiov 3 0 0 3 1 6 -5 0

Group B P W D L GF GA GD Pts
Candelaria And Marquez 3 3 0 0 8 2 6 9
Elves Security Forces 3 2 0 1 8 3 5 6
Blouman Empire 3 1 0 2 6 8 -2 3
Ameriganastan 3 0 0 3 1 10 -9 0

Group C P W D L GF GA GD Pts
Newmanistan 3 3 0 0 6 3 3 9
Land de Wood 3 1 1 1 5 4 1 4*
Yafor 2 3 1 1 1 5 4 1 4*
Krytenia 3 0 0 3 1 6 -5 0

*Head to head result Land de Wood 2-2 Yafor 2.

Group D P W D L GF GA GD Pts
Daehanjeiguk 3 2 1 0 8 4 4 7
Sothern Northland 3 1 2 0 7 6 1 5
Jeruselem 3 1 1 1 5 5 0 4
Lovisa 3 0 0 3 3 8 -5 0

The Starblaydi Football Association decided that the best way to settle the Group tie would be through a penalty shoot-out between the two sides. Fans from both sides were free to attend this extra 'match', given one side (longways) of the stadium each so their would be no 'Home' or 'Away' end for the penalties to be taken from, and the result was as follows:

Land de Wood 4-2 Yafor 2

Quarter-Final Fixtures
Cafundéu Vs Elves Security Forces
Candelaria And Marquez Vs Starblaydia
Newmanistan Vs Sorthern Northland
Daehanjeiguk Vs Land de Wood.

Well after some deliberation working out a fair way to resolve the neck and neck finish of Land de Wood and Yafor 2, the organisers decided the best way given obvious time restraints was a penalty shoot out.

Land de Wood kicked things off with Richard Higgins scoring a beauty.
Jamie Durand stepped up for Yafor 2 and slotted it home.
David Bomber steps up and scores the Woodpeckers 2nd penalty.
Danilo Silva steps up and blasts it over.
Kevin Wallace slots home the Woodpeckers 3rd penalty to give them a 2 goal advantage
Amario Otavias scores the next penalty
Ray Hamil steps up and restores the Woodpeckers 2 goal advantage slotting the ball into the corner.
Ahershk Valinial steps up to take the 4th penalty but it is saved by Steve Pilot.

Land de Wood are through to the quarter finals where they will face the might of Daehanjeigu, who were 2nd favourites to win the tournament before it began and were unbeaten in their group.

(Players gather before the game)

Carson: Good morning everyone. Big game ahead of us today, as we all well know. I believe in all of you. But I want to start this off with a little story.

Seidler: Yay storytime!

Carlson: Shhh!

Seidler: Just playing, go ahead.

Carson: Ok, well the story is about a group of kids. One of which born with an unfortunate last name.

(Pauses)

Carson: They came from a place somewhat well known to the world, but not necessarily the first national name that would come off the tip of your tongue. All the wanted to do was have fun, and represent their country with honor and dignity.

(Pauses again)

Carson: They were seen by outsiders as being too carefree, that they didn’t take things seriously at all, and never focused. But deep down, these kids wanted it just as badly as anyone else. Sure, they wanted to have fun, and maybe they did a few, let’s say, questionable things, but when it came time to play, they gave everything they had.

LaFave: Cool.

Taratino: Ok, then what.

Carson: When they got to the location in which they’re games were going to be played, they were met with even more unfortunate news. They could not stay in a comfortable hotel. They could not practice on a great green field. But the kids? They didn’t care. The situations just made them stronger, and come together as a group. To overcome all obstacles and to win the title that they so desparately wanted.

Brogan: Did they win?

Carson: They did not. But they bonded together and played with so much grit, so much character, that it was absolutely amazing. You knew that wherever they want in their lives that they would continue to work hard, and that the team they played for would always be full of people that worked hard until the very end.

Carlson: Uh huh.

Carson: They got to the semifinal. The kid with the unfortunate last name had a big game. But made one big mistake that cost them the game. The team I am referencing..... is Sorthern Northland. They want to avenge that one big mistake now. If you think they worked hard before, this new group will work twice as hard.

Talcott: We got to match it.

Carlson: Damn right!

Brogan: Exactly, we cannot take anything for granted.

Carson: I believe that you can. There will be times during the game when things will appear to be tough, but like they did, we need to dig down deep ourselves. We have that some chemistry in this locker room now as we did then when we won that big game.

J Vilardi: And we know that everyone, like J-Mac and company, will be watching wanting to see us do it. I’m ready coach.

Carlson: Let’s go Rockets.

Carson: Very good all! For Newmanistan! Let’s get this win!

(About an hour after Carson’s speech: Brian gets a phone call. It is Empress Jessica herself)

Carson: (picks up phone): Hello....

Empress: Hello Brian, how is everything.

Carson: Everything’s great. I’m really excited about our forthcoming game with Sorthern Northland. Hey, you remember when they kicked the ball at you?

Empress: Yeah, that was something. But I am calling over something serious. There could be a bomb.

Carson: The Larryians?

Empress: I don’t know why the Larryians would want to sabotage the Di Bradini Cup, but this could be big. I heard something about Starblaydi security needing to be tight at this upcoming game.

Carson: But our war with the Larryians... why... why would they come to Starblaydia? I thought things were starting to get under control.

Empress: I don’t know. I really don’t know, but I heard about a bomb. And why would someone want to sabotage a Di Bradini Cup game. The war hasn’t reached our soil, it’s been in the South Thumbrian sea. I really don’t understand why they would want anything to do with you guys, but, just be careful, you know.

Carson: Sorthern Northland has a bit of a military history too, maybe it is one of their enemies? Are they are war too?

Empress: There’s something going on there, with Inisnadun, I think it is.

Carson: Oh boy. Look it’s probably them. Not that it’s going to make us any more safe if a bomb goes off.

Empress: But you know what will happens.... they will blame the other. Or worse, they’ll join forces to cause harm to civilians of both nations since fans of both sides will be in the same nation.

Carson: Oi vey! Look, I’m going to try and not to think about this.....

Empress: Wait there’s something on the news right now (Empress pauses). Some guy has taken Bryn Evans hostage, and declared that they will detonate a bomb. It’s not the Larryians, it’s that Inisnadun.

Carson: Well I feel a teeny bit better, though the knowledge of a bomb still concerns me.

Empress: Alright, well the Larryians probably won’t go all the way out there to send a message. But still, be safe, please.

Carson: I will.

(Moments later: Empress Jessica issues a statement to Riora Urraim of Inisnadum)

Empress Statement: To the people of the Inisnadun nation. I don’t know what your beef is with Sorthern Northland, and respect the fact that it is something that is between the two of you. The Empire of Newmanistan does not know enough about the conflict to take a side in it. We do not wish to make enemies with you, nor do we wish to make enemies with Sorthern Northland. However, let me assure you one thing. You have threatened to set off a bomb at Sorthern Northland’s match which also involves the Empire of Newmanistan at a stadium in which a large number of Newmanistanians will be present. If you decide to carry out this attack, and just one Newmanistanian is wounded or killed in the blast, then Newmanistan will consider it an act of war, and not only will you have the Sorthern Northland occupation to worry about, you will have the full force of the Newmanistanian military to worry about. We will not take it lying down. I suggest that if you have an issue with Sorthern Northland, that you make your statement in another manner to where innocent, non-involved civilians become involved. Or else, if this plan goes through, and just one Newmanistanian is injured, we will take swift military action. Not to mention, I doubt the Starblaydi military would take such an action lying down as well.

Well after that special penalty shoot out earlier today, we have an exclusive interview with manager Andrew Wood.

Larry: Good evening Andrew,
Andrew: Good evening Larry,
Larry: So were you pleased with the decision by the organisers to decide the group on a penalty shoot out.
Andrew: Very much so, not just because we won, but given the time constraints it seemed the best thing to do.
Larry: So did you have much time to practice penalties before hand?
Andrew: Well we had done a few practice penalty shoot outs before coming to this tournament just in case and I think that stood as in good stead.
Larry: We've heard reports of a possible bomb threat to the tournament, do you know any more?
Andrew: I've heard one or two rumours of a bomb threat against Southern Northland in their next match. I would just like to take this opportunity to remind everyone that this is a sporting event that should be completely separate from anything going on elsewhere. If it is interfered with then we will support the hosts in whatever action they decide to take along with any other innocent nations that request our help.
Larry: So moving on what do you make of our next opponents Daehanjeiguk.
Andrew: Well they are going to be a difficult side, unbeaten in the group stages, but our boys are starting to look good now.
Larry: Aren't you worried their attack is going to over run us?
Andrew: They are going to expect us just to sit back and just roll over but instead I am intending to match their attackive play, play for play. It is going to be an entertaining game for the fans, and I reckon we can beat them.
Larry: Be good if we can, so any thoughts on the team to play them?
Andrew: Well Pilot will stay in goal, he has been as reliable as ever there.
Larry: Indeed and he pulled of that beauty of a penalty save as well. What about in defense:
Andrew: Well I don't think we've done too badly there, Ray Hamimil and Joshua Ashton have been playing well at full back, while in the centre Richard Wilson has done well but I've opted for Curro Arnott ahead of Leyti Goldberg due to Arrnot's experience. Charlot Avakian will continue in front of the back four.
Larry: What about the rest of the midfield?
Andrew: Garnet Aigner has been doing well in the centre of the park, down the wings we've had mixed results from Tom Darkless and Kevin Wallace, Woodrow Wilson is coming on in leaps and bounds. So I'm opting for Kevin Wallace down the right and Woodrow Wilson down the left.
Larry: Interesting decision what about up front.
Andrew: David Bomber has been great in the air and Richard Higgins just needs to find the back of net a bit more often.
Larry: Thank you Andrew, good to speak to you as always
Andrew: And you, good night.
Larry: Good night and good luck


So Woodrow Wilson has been given the left wing position. He may only be 18 but he has already been tipped to break into the full national side this year. Some say he should have gone to the Oxen Cup. Perhaps the one thing that lets Woodrow down is his right foot, that left foot of his, can hit a beauty of a cross and he has pace in abundance.

We now have our next team line up.
Formation 4-1-3-2. Style: very attackive [+3]

Steve Pilot
Ray Hamil Richard Wilson Curro Arnot Joshua Ashton
Charlot Avakian
Kevin Wallace Garnet Aigner Woodrow Wilson
David Bomber Richard Higgins

ooc: LDW, your links are broken

Hwang: Whoohoo!

Shin: Stop yelling already!

Shim: Don't make me put lipstick on you.

*everyone takes a moment to gaze at Hwang, stuck to the wall in a duct tape mesh, with a huge pile of dropped popcorn pieces in front of him*

Hwang: Well, can someone pass me the popcorn?

Shin: *tosses a piece at Hwang* That's the last one.

Shim: You said that about three hundred pieces ago.

Shin: But he keeps asking!

Shim: Then don't give it to him.

Shin: But I have to. He's cute when he's taped to the wall.

Shim: I'd bet that Hwang would look cute in a duck suit too.

Shin: Oh, we should do that sometime!

Hwang: Sure, whatever. Can I have another popcorn?

Shin: Stop asking! *tosses a piece of popcorn*

Shim: Where's Wang?

Shin: Oh, he'll wake up a little bit. You'll know.

Shim: Oh, tell me you didn't.

Wang: *outside and furiously screaming* GAH!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Shim: You did.

Wang: *enters dressed in red shirt, red pants, and painted red skin* What the %$#^!

Shim: Oh my...

Shin: Doesn't he look nice in color?

Shim: He does.

Hwang: Hey, Wang! Pass me a popcorn!

Wang: *throws the bowl at Hwang* Who did this to me?

Shin: *points at Shim*

Shim: *points at Shin*

Hwang: I'd point, but my hands are taped to the wall.

Wang: Gah! I can't be red! What's wrong with just plain black or white?

Shim: You needed some color in your life. Trust us, you'll love colors in a few days.

Shin: Give it some time.

Wang: I just hope this red stuff comes off. *leaves*

SUPER: *enters a little perplexed* Who was that troll that just passed in here?

Shim: That would be Wang.

SUPER: Wang? I hardly recognized him. Are you sure?

Shin & Shim: Yes. We're sure.

SUPER: *shrugs* Okay. Well, I got you your reports.

Shin: Thanks!

SUPER: No problem. I mean, nothing is coming out from the Office (of Paranormal Activities), so why not look up a few stats on the Land de Wood team. Gotta tell you, they love Wood. Virtually everyone person is named Wood. Oh, and it seems that the Academy (of Foreign Affairs) is considering re-opening an embassy in Krytenia (ooc: ever since they changed their minds from being West Starblaydia); doesn't make a difference when it comes to their team.

Shim: And you looked that up?

SUPER: No. I just got an email from the Office.

Shin: That's odd.

Wang: *smelling like bleach and alcohol* Success!

SUPER: Wang, stop drinking my secret stock of tequila!

Shin: It's not secret if everyone knows about it.

Wang: That was tequila?

Shim: I guess it's still a secret to Wang.

SUPER: Get some sun too. You look a little pale. *leaves*

Shin: I can't believe you bleached yourself!

Wang: Well, I tried the alcohol first, but that didn't quite work well, so I went with the bleach.

Shin: That doesn't mean you're suddenly allowed to bleach yourself. We're going to have to clean you up before the match. *leaves with Wang*

Shim: Hwang, yell at us if the match starts. And yell extremely loud if we're not back. *leaves*

Hwang: *hanging on the tape* Hey guys. I've gotta tinkle...

Land de Wood News football youth section

Our apologies to those who expected to see our kits in yesterdays edition, the intern responsible failed to link everything together properly. We are delighted that Daehanjeiguk put aside the fact that we are playing them next, and let us know about this.
So we are now delighted to the special kits our team are wearing for this
tournament available from Wood clothing at just 55 woods a kit:

(from left to right: home, away, goalie)
http://www.ajwood.me.uk/land_de_Wood/u21home_kit.jpghttp://www.ajwood.me.uk/land_de_Wood/u21away_kit.jpghttp://www.ajwood.me.uk/land_de_Wood/u21goalies_kit.jpg

http://img71.imageshack.us/img71/7943/snpaperby0.png (http://imageshack.us)

President condemns terror threat from Separatists

Following the threat to detonate a bomb at a Di Bradini Cup game from Inisnadún separatists earlier this morning Jimmy Sheridan spoke to assure fans attending the game and the tournament that the Sorthern government is doing all it can to assure fans safety at the competition.

Just minutes after Empress Jessica of Newmanistan had released a statement warning separatist group, Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún, of the possible consequences of their actions, President Jimmy Sheridan called a press conference at the Houses of Parliament. Speaking to a crowd of journalists as well as being broadcast worldwide on television the President warned the terrorist organisation that they would be asking for Hell should they carry out the attack whilst always calling for restraint from around the world, the President also stressed that Sorthern Northland was also doing it all it could to assist Starblaydi authorities.

"First of all, the safety of everyone at the tournament, whether they be players, fans or staff is of paramount importance, and for that reason it is imperative that the bomb if such a device exists is found and safely defused and after that making sure this tournament is not hit with another such security concern. We are doing everything we can to assist the local authorities in finding and defusing the device and I have the utmost confidence that this will be achieved. Once again I want to make it clear that the safety of everyone at the tournament is a huge concern to us and I am embarrassed, concerned and wholeheartedly sorry that Sorthern citizens have created this situation.

Secondly, the men responsible for this must be found, arrested and bought to justice and again we will assist the Starblaydi authorities in finding them and bringing them to justice here and abroad in both Starblaydia and any other nation should they harm any foreign citizens. We have already supplied the Starblaydi intelligence services with the tape in an attempt to work out the groups location. Once we have found where they are hiding, the men can be arrested and the hostage Bryn Evans freed, a matter which is also of great importance.

Thirdly I would like to call upon the citizens of Inisnadún in the help of securing the capture of this man. Inisnadún has many time held a referendum on declaring independence from Sorthern Northland and has voted overwhelmingly on every occasion to remain a part of Sorthern Northland. Someone one the island must know who these men are and possibly even know of their plans. We urge anyone who knows anything to come forward with the information. It could make the difference in saving a life or even many lives. Whilst we respect the strong feeling of pride that Inisnadún has in being Inisnadún, it is still a part of Sorthern Northland as it's people have voted for, under no pressure from the mainland. All Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún's claims of mass genocide, forced labour and mass deportation of Inisnadún's residents are untrue and in fact could not be further from the truth. The Sorthern government has fully supported increased autonomy for the island as well as subsidising schemes to support the Inisnadún language and way of life for future generations.

And finally I would also like to call for restraint from the international community. Whilst we are grateful to both Newmanistan and Land de Wood for raising concerns about the situation and saying an attack will mean them taking action against the perpetrators we would like to remind them that Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún is a small group committed to gaining independence for Inisnadún through methods of terrorism. Any battle or action should be against Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún and not the people of Inisnadún. Whilst we appreciate the desire of the nations in insuring safety we implore them to only take action against those responsible and not those who happen to be from the same place as them. That will be all."

Meanwhile over in Inisnadún, local leaders have also called for care to be taken should Newmanistan, Land de Wood or another nation get involved. One leader commented, "we are glad to see the actions of RUIN condemned, and we want to make it 110% clear that we have nothing to with the group. The majority of people on this island do not support the group, it's goals or it's methods. They are an embarrassment to us and cause us nothing but trouble. Whilst we welcome any action taken against them, we must remind the governments of those involved that the local government and administration and majority of people here would have nothing to do with the group."

Countdown (http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/entertainment/7527091.stm) to Quarter-Finals. (Yes that is a link - click it for some inspiration behind this RP)

In Tabeck, during the run-up to the Newmanistan/Sorthern Northland game, two stewards placing coloured pieces of card to produce flag mosaics for the two nations were bored. All they had for the Sortherners was lots and lots of those bloody red coloured ones. As they reached the end of a row, they came upon two people with strange Inisnadún accents. Not that anyone knows what that actually sounds like, but that's what they were. One was a gentleman in glasses and a garish tie, while the other was an attractive middle-aged woman, perhaps the 'Thinking Man's' Dazza Dallas. Beside them was an enormous clock with a single hand, while they had taken up the nine seats beside them with blue cards of their own. 'PISD!LAOS', it read.

"Your time starts," the bespectacled man said with a chuckle, "now."

As if to emphasise the moment, the woman pressed play on a small portable music player, and a tense tune played out. The clock started ticking, and by the way it was lit up, there were 30 seconds left to go. Attached to the clock by the way of some long, curled wires was a bundle of dynamite sticks.

"Disposal," one of the stewards said into his microphone, the super not-so-secret code word for the calling of Bomb Disposal experts to his location.

"Not quite!" the man replied.

There had been no response over the radio to the stewards call, either. So he tried again with more force. Twenty seconds to go, after all.

"DISPOSAL!" he yelled into the mic.

"'DISPOSAL!' you say," the man said, "let's have a look:"

The middle-aged woman, teetering on massively high heels, quickly rearranged the eight letters and punctuation mark while the stewards were distracted by an appalling joke from the man.

"There," he said, "DISPOSAL! Did anyone in the audience get it? Students? Old people with nothing better to do? Anyone?"

The two were swiftly arrested, and immediately imprisoned. The woman got twenty-six years, while the man received life.

Quarter-Final Scores
Cafundéu 0-2 Elves Security Forces
Candelaria And Marquez 2-1 Starblaydia
Newmanistan 3-0 Sorthern Northland
Daehanjeiguk 1-0 Land de Wood.

Semi-Final Fixtures
Elves Security Forces Vs Candelaria And Marquez
Newmanistan Vs Daehanjeiguk

"Are you sure that is what she said Nicold? Are you absolutely positive that she mentioned nothing else or elaborated further upon her intentions?"

After spending the last two hours recalling his tale to the Great Leader, Nicold was quite ready for the conversation to be finished with. He was a humble elf, not one for long winded conversations about the plight of the country or trying to explain prophecies. He was completely out of his norm here, but the blacksmith could just feel that Tobias was not entirely convinced, not yet.

"Sir, I am positive that I have said everything that transpired in the chance meeting. So long as my mind is not playing devilious tricks upon me, you know everything that I have been told."

"But why would Elune ask me to give up my power as Great Leader though, and at such a critical moment in our history. There are things that simply do not add up or as I suspect, have been neglected to be told to us. While I do trust my dear wife with my life, I am not sure she is Great Leader material, or ready to take on such a responsibility such as it would require. This is unprecedented Nicold, Elune asking a Great Leader to hand over their seat, it has never happened before."

"She did mention the promise of destiny though, that might be a clue as to her plans. Did you not mention something about the new High Priestess being promised a touch of destiny from Elune?"

"Not quite Nicold, she promised that the events of the Tides of Darkness would never occur again, nor would such tragedies on that epic scale ever be allowed to transpire again. Yet now you tell me that she has said if I do not hand over my seat of power, the Tides of Darkness shall come again. After everything that has already happened to me and my people, and then she asks me to do this, it is enough to shake even my staunch faith in her."

"Forgive me if I'm wrong milord, but is your wife not some sort of sorceress or something of the magical sort? I know it is quite a stretch, but it appears to me that Elune may have some sort of scheme in the works that requires a being of magical origins, which would very well be your wife."

The Great Leaders gaze quickly turned from the window to the blacksmith and his eyes lit up. He had never taken into consideration of his wife's strange abilities. She had spoken of them the day they had met, but he had never seen them in action and began to assume that they were simply a boast. Yet if they were true, then things that seemed soo dearly out of place would make more sense, especially if Elune did favor women as opposed to men as it had been rumored.

"You just might be a genius Nicold, just might. I'll need to talk to my wife, but I think I might be making an announcement in the coming weeks. Thank you for visit Nicold, and stay awhile if you can, as you know you are always welcomed inside the Raynor mansion, but I must go have a nice long chat with my dear wife."

THE FOOTBALL DIARY
Your new option of Sports Magazine - daily!
Just V$1,00 - ten pages of daily football news!
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CAFUNDÉU LOSES IN KNOCKOUTS

After getting the qualification in the group stage, and even winning the group, Cafundéu had to defeat Valanora in the quarterfinals of the Di Bradini Cup in order to continue its battle for the title. Everyone knew that the game was going to be a very difficult one, and that the Monopolists would need more than luck to get the positive result. The coach David Nefasto ordered the team to make an intensive marking, to stop the opponent at all costs, and to counterattack with the combination of the speed of the players and the passing ability of the midfielders.

The tactics were good, but the players needed to perform well in order to transform the plan into reality. And that was the most difficult part of the team's strategy. The black-blue players were talented enough to dribble the yellow shirt defenders without difficulties, and to find the breaches in the defence to attack. After some missed initial chances, the goal appeared. Jurangil made an excellent pass to Celebrindal inside the area, who shot to score the goal. Few minutes after, Celebrindal took the rebound from a Peru save and scored the second goal.

Losing by two goals of difference, the Cafundelense players started to stop their opponents with fouls. The supporters, noticing that the team was desperated and the amount of fouls made was too high, gave up. Valanora controlled the game, and did not score more goals because the violence of the Monopolists stopped them from doing it. In their best chance in the second half, Ancalímon was running to the attack and had only the keeper to beat when Rogério came and fouled him. Red card to the Cafundelense, but at least he stopped a goal. The game ended with the Valanora victory.

CAFUNDÉU 0x2 VALANORA

Referee: Kevin Miller (Newmanistan).
MOTM: Finwë Celebrindal (Valanora).

CAFUNDÉU: Peru; Rogério, Ivan, Japa (Jules 75') and Nunes; Fabinho, Serrano (Marques 62') and Ilmari; Matoso (Sérgio Guará 62'), Nando and Alves.
Coach: David Nefasto.

VALANORA: Ciryatan; Srion, Deadleaf and Séregon; Ories, Ricardinho, Jurangil, Súrion (Súrin 45') and Delara (Ancalímon 66'); Celebrindal and Anwamanë (Inwëlin 80').
Coach: Orophin Anárion.

Goals:VAL: Celebrindal 15'/18'.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC Goalscorers:

3- Alves
1- Serrano, Matoso, Fabinho, Ilmari

So after squeezing through the group stages on penalties we now faced 2nd favourites Daehanjeiguk. This was never going to be an easy game, both sides had opted to play very attackively, so we expected lots of goals.

So you can imagine our surprise when the first half finished without a goal! Despite good attackive play from both sides they somehow canceled each other out. Woodrow Wilson made some great runs down the left but failed to make them count with any proper crosses, while Kevin Wallace faired rather better with his crosses David Bomber failed to put any away.
Richard Wilson continued to be the rock at the back stemming the flow of attacks against him while Steve Pilot made a couple of good saves.
So half time and no goals, what is going on here!
Well both sides continued their attackive play in the 2nd half, but still no one could find the back of the net, Tom Darkless came on for the ineffective Woodrow Wilson with Kevin Wallace swapping flanks, but still no way could be found past the Han defence by the Woodpeckers.
The Han made some good attacks and then in the 78th minute Shin Hyeiseong burst from the midfield and played the ball into Yi Eunju who slotted home to make it 1-0.
The Woodpeckers meanwhile seemed stunned by this and failed to mount much of an attack after this killer blow.
So despite the promises of two attackive teams going for goals the final score was surprising Daehanjeiguk 1-0 Land de Wood.

Our boys can be proud to make the quarter finals of such an illustrious tournament when the full side have yet to take part in the Baptism of Fire.

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS; STARBLAYDI SECURITY VERY IMPRESSIVE

Tabeck, Starblaydia- Unfortunately, the quarterfinal match between Newmanistan and Sorthern Northland was overshadowed by a terrorist threat from members of a group known as RUIN, an organization that has bitter feelings towards the government of Sorthern Northland. There’s a whole political story there, and for more specifically on that story, please read the “World News” section. Bryn Evans, the manager of the Sorthern Northland team had been taken hostage by the group, and we’re sure this made things very difficult for the young kids trying to represent their nation in a football competition. Several Newmanistanian players shook hands and offered hugs of support, especially Jennifer Vilardi, and Rockets manager Brian Carson made a special effort to reach out to their players as well, letting them know that the Rockets were sympathetic of what they were going through. He also wore a pin on his jacket showing the Newmanistan and Sorthern Northland flags crossed together, as did assistant Chris Merrill. But there was still a game to be played, and the Rockets were here to win. Thankfully, a bomb never went off, thanks to the quick work of Starblaydi law enforcement. A bomb was discovered, however, it was deactivated and disposed of before it could do any harm. Two people were arrested, and on behalf of everyone in the stadium, we thank those heroes for their swift action as who knows how many lives were saved. Likely hundreds, and maybe even thousands. With the bomb disposed of, all the way left was for the Rockets to dispose of the Northerners in the quarterfinal. We could all breathe easier now, and concentrate on football.

Ahhh yes, football. That is why we came. There would have been enough plotlines in this game without the additional drama. Eight years ago, Newmanistan defeated Sorthern Northland in the semifinal in extra time, a win that never would have happened if not for stoppage time blunder by Lee Waywide, and an equally impressive capitalizing on the chance by Brian Wright that sent the game into extra time in the first place. Then, there was the most recent Cup of Harmony that saw twenty combined players from the Di Bradini 4 teams participate in that game. Waywide and his teammates got sweet revenge in that quarterfinal. It may have given Brian Carson a guilty conscience in thinking it, but with everything that the Northerners had been through, it would be best for Newmanistan to try to capitalize and strike early. The Rockets went on the attack, and while the Northeners did their best to try and defend, they found themselves out of position on several chances. While Newmanistan didn’t score an immediate goal, they sense that their opponent seemed to be a little ragged in the back, and they decided to go at them with shorter passes and a slower but more fluent attack. In the 13th minute, they found the back of the net. Jennifer and Shannon Vilardi passed the ball well between them, and ultimately Jennifer got defender Freddy Lovell to bite in a big way on a fake pass to Brett Carlson. This gave her a little more room to position herself for a golden shot chance. Benjamin Gaudet charged at her, seeing that as really his only chance, but Jennifer took the shot before Gaudet could get to her, giving Newmanistan a 1-nil lead. Eight minutes later, the Rockets struck again, and once again it was Jennifer Vilardi. This time it came off a cross from James Seidler in which she knocked down, and again faked out a defender, this time Bernard Labbe, with a pass before firing a second shot in the back of the net. This is exactly what Newmanistan wanted to do. Score early. But the early goals weren’t done. Just four minutes later, in the 25th minute, the other Vilardi, Shannon, fired a shot past Gaudet. Brett Carlson gets an assist on the goal. Just 25 minutes in, the Rockets were up 3-nil. The demoralized looks on the Sorthern Northland players told the story. They had been through so much, and now, they were down by a quick three. Brian Carson saw this and called off the dogs for the remainder of the first half. The remaining first half time was rather uneventful. The Northerners could not pass the ball well. They were truly lost. And deep down, the Rockets seemed to realize this.

At halftime, the mood in the locker room was one that sensed a victory. And how could they not? Sorthern Northland was clearly not themselves. They felt for them, and they hoped that their situation with their manager would resolve itself with Mr. Evans being able to regain full health and coach the team again. But Newmanistan did not come here for charity, especially this new group of Rockets that desperately want to do what their peers did here eight years ago. Carson did gave his team the message to go into ultra-defensive mode, and made two substitutions to start the second half that would better play this system. In came Eric Blunden and Michelle Norton. Out went Dirk Brogan and Shannon Vilardi. Newmanistan moved into a very tight defensive formation. At the start of the second half, Sorthern Northland showed the character that they were well known for. They tried to make the comeback. Their passes were better, and if they started the game out like this, it could have seen a whole different result. But still, they did not get many shots on net as the Rockets defense answered the challenges. After about 20-25 minutes of the Northerners giving all they possibly could but being frustrated by some great Newmanistan play in the back end, dejection seemed to set back in the heads of their players. We were now approaching minute 70, and they had given everything they could. Yet the scoreline still read 3-nil. Newmanistan victory was inevitable, and as the final minutes ticked off the clock, everyone in the stadium got confirmation of a result that knew would play out after the 25th minute. The only question was what would be the final margin of victory. Yes, the Rockets could have completely poured it on an perhaps one this game in a major blowout. But, there was no reason for that. They would still be playing Daehanjeiguk next, regardless.

Yes, that is our next opponent, as in the semifinals, we have no sleepers. No Fujisawan Territories. No Land de Wood sleeper stories. It’s just the big boys that are left. Newmanistan. Daehanjeiguk. Candelaria And Marquez. Valanora. Those four nations have won every Di Bradini Cup that has been won, with each having at least one. Candelaria And Marquez has two. Will they get their third, or will someone match them at two? We will soon find out.

Narrator: Welcome to your Pocono City Sports Report, here’s your host once again the lovely Meghan Traynor! And some guy named Kevin Collins.

Collins: Oh I feel the love already, welcome to your morning Pock City Sports Report.

Traynor: Yes good morning Kevin, a lot going on in the world of sports once again today, but before we get into it. Kevin, before the start of the 28th Baptism of Fire, you accurately predicted that Arroza would win it.....

Collins: That’s because I know all! Don’t forget I also predicted the winner of the 27th Baptism of Fire. Who was that again?

Traynor: Uh huh... so millions of gamblers out there want to hear who predict will win Baptism of Fire 29.

Collins: Oh come on Meghan. The 28th version at least had a few good candidates. Number 29 is going to be a complete walk in the park for Land de Wood. Easy.

Traynor: Alright, well let’s start off with the Di Bradini Cup, where the Rockets semifinal opponent could have been that Land de Wood side.

Collins: Yeah, see, does Land de Wood’s beginning to interregional football remind you of how another nation may have started out, say, eight years ago?

Traynor: Not to mention, they also have a great lacrosse program like that other nation does.

Collins: Good observation. See that, Meghan’s got her job for more then her looks.

Traynor: Why thank you, now let’s talk about those clowns who beat us in the final last year.

Collins: I smell a little redemption in order. You know, I’ll tell you this. I want to see Newmanistan-Candelaria And Marquez. Come on now, Margaret, make it happen.

Traynor: Yes, and not in the third place game.

Collins: That would be very anticlimatic. Hey, let’s face it, right now Newmanistan and Candelaria And Marquez are the top U-21 nations in the world. Yet they have never met. Ever! It’s time to finally see them go head to head, and to do it for a championship.

Traynor: Daehanjeiguk may object to you excluding them from the statement of top U-21 nations in the world.

Collins: (expletive) Daehanjeiguk. What are they gonna do send Wang and Hwang after me?

Traynor: Hopefully not. That’s a good side though and I think they have earned the right to be considered in same breath as us and Candelaria And Marquez in this. And ya know, Valanora too.

Collins: Still you know the time has come. Candelaria And Marquez won the Cup of Harmony by going through the Newmanistan bracket. Now, it’s time for the nations to meet. It’s fate. Newmanistan will take care of Daehanjeiguk, you know why, Meghan?

Traynor: Why?

Collins: Because the Rockets are peaking at the right time. They were all over Sorthern Northland. Yeah, yeah, it’s a tragic deal with the coach, but they probably could have won by the same scoreline even if it wasn’t for all that. They’re doing good right now. Very, very good. You see the spark, Meghan, it’s there.

Traynor: Yes, you can sense it.

Collins: They want it. They can feel it. They want to have the same legacy that Jeremy McAllister’s golden boot, Brooker’s D, and Shawn’s (Drummond’s) Hero had. That triple play worked then, and it can happen again. It paid off, and there is more to come. (OOC: Refer to my recent post in the World Cup Discussion thread to truly “get” this particular line)

Traynor: Yeah, I guess so. And certainly there’s no shortage of momentum to want to beat the Han. It’s the third consecutive meeting between the clubs in the Di Bradini knockouts.

Collins: And before we go on to the next segment, how about a big round of applause to the Starblaydi counterterrorism authorities for defusing that bomb that could have killed many.

Traynor: Absolutely. I can’t believe that happened, and it’s too bad that that sick organization decided to take their message to Starblaydia and into the Di Bradini Cup. We should be so grateful for their heroic work. Thank you, to those who made what could have been a horrible situation not occur.

Collins: Yes, thank you, and I hope those two rot in jail.

Traynor: Definitely. Now let’s go to break and when we come back, our next segment will be on the Lacrosse game against Kura-Pelland. (OOC: Next segment to appear on that thread!)

Land de Wood Sports Di Bradini Cup Special
Well with our lads going out in the quarter finals we have just one last report to bring you, a closing interview with Andrew Wood.
Larry: Good evening Andrew
Andrew: Good evening Larry
Larry: So how do you feel the game went?
Andrew: Well to be honest I was disappointed, both teams came here to play very attackive football but somehow canceled each other out for most of the game apart from their late goal.
Larry: Yes, I think that killed the spirit in our lads a bit.
Andrew: Indeed they were going at it hang and tong, attacking, attacking and failing to find a way through and when they conceded I think it just sapped the energy out of them.
Larry: Still we did well to get out of the group stages at our first attempt.
Andrew: Indeed we did.
Larry: So Newmanistan are saying we are now favourites to win the Baptism of Fire, any comments?
Andrew: Well the Baptism of Fire is an unknown, it is all about the unknown, lots of previously unknown teams come together and play in a tournament at stadiums that are to a certain degree unknown. The problem we have is that we are not an unknown, people have seen as at the Oxen Cup and now the Di Bradini Cup and so will know what to expect from us.
Larry: Indeed, so we need to change things around a bit?
Andrew: Indeed we do, we'll going to bring in a few hitherto untried players and perhaps a different formation and see if we can spring a surprise or two.
Larry: Sounds good, so coming back to this tournament who do you think will win?
Andrew: Well there's a question, Newmanistan won our group in convincing fashion and continue to play some good football. Elves Security Forces have a chance for revenge against Candelaria And Marquez in the semis but I have a feeling Candelaria And Marquez
will sneak it but I'm not sure Candelaria And Marquez will go and win it. The there is Daehanjeiguk who I think Newmanistan may be underestimating, they play some good attackive football and may surprise people. But really I think the Rockets from Newmanistan have to be favourites, but as we've already proved, football is full of surprises.
Larry: Indeed it is, and that's all we have time for so I wish you well with the Baptism of Fire and will say good night.
Andrew: Thanks and good night.

So there we have Andrew Wood playing down his team's chances in the Baptism of Fire, not wanting to get the country overhyped. Also he seems to be tipping Newmanistan as favourites to go on and win it, but warning them to watch out for surprises.

Shin & Shim & Hwang: BOO!!!

Wang: *cleans out ears* Stop you too. The game's not even playing.

Shin: Some idiot in Newmanistan just cursed at us.

Wang: *sighs* Why don't you press the "button" then?

Shin: I think I will! *presses button*

Wang: I didn't mean "literally"!

=== Newmanistan ===

Collins: ...meet. It’s fate. Newmanistan will take care of Daehanjeiguk, you know why, Meghan?

Traynor: Why? *Collins spontaneously explodes* HOLY %$#^!

*panic and pandemonium ensue*

=== The Control Box ===

Hwang: Wow, I'm amazed. I'm never insulting Shin ever again.

Shim: That's impressive. You made the machine work, Shin.

Wang: Only we don't want to spontaneously explode people who curse out the Han Empire. Free speech, eh?

Shin: But he's not a citizen of the Han Empire!

Wang: I'm guessing only citizens are allowed to curse out the Empire?

Shin: Still... I think some of that bleach cleaned out your head.

Wang: My head? That bleach saved my skin! Literally!

Hwang: Can we try "literally" fixing the problem before the Supervisor figures out what happens?

*all gaze at Hwang*

Shim: That's probably the most intelligent thing I've ever heard you say.

Hwang: Thanks. Wanna see my Schwarzenegger accent?

Wang: We don't have any one named Schwarzenegger, and that's not solving the problem. Some dude just blew up in Newmanistan, and we need to fix it so it never happened!

SUPER: I've just gotten a report from Newmanistan. Some idiot just spontaneously exploded? Wanna explain that?

Shin: *rushes to the door and shuts SUPER out* Okay, let's do it.

Wang: We don't even have a plan.

Shin: Does it matter?

Wang: We're going to need some way for us to time travel or at least erase the present reality to allow for a reality in which that reporter guy does not spontaneously explode on live TV. You know?

Shin: Problem solved. I'll hit a button and it will do just that.

Wang: What makes you think that?

Shin: Well, it worked before. It's not like some random person spontaneously exploded; that one person exploded. So if I want something to happen, then it will happen.

Wang: *stops Shin* Well, what do you want to have happen?

Shin: None of this ever happened.

Wang: Be careful with that idea, because you might just erase the universe. We want it specifically so that the Newmanistan dude never even exploded. We're erasing universes here, not causing something to happen. It's totally different.

Shin: Okay. I want to erase all realities where that excessively racist %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ never explodes.

Wang: You see, for some odd reason, I have a feeling that what's really going to happen is that every single universe in which the random sports caster dude is not exploded will survive the pressing of that button.

Hwang: Could you just press the %$#^ button? My butt itches.

Shin: I'll scratch in a little bit! *thinks about it* I really want to erase all realities in which the little %$#^ does not explode.

Wang: You're telling me one thing, but your voice is saying something else.

Shim: Let me press the button!

Wang: *stops Shim* The last time you pressed the button, we got teleported to Starblaydia, and I got painted red. That's the last thing I want to have happen.

Shin: I'm beginning to feel like I want to erase all realities in which someone named Wang ever existed!

Wang: No, we don't want to do that. Because then who would control Hwang?

Shin: Good point.

Shim: Why don't you press the button?

Wang: Because I turn on the popcorn machine.

Shin: And Hwang just causes random %$#^ to happen. So I'll just try erasing the realities in which I press the button.

Wang: That's a paradox, because in order to have erased that universe, you will have needed to press a button. So it doesn't quite work out. Either that or you'll cause a rip in the space-time dimensional duality that creates a gigantic existential collapse of order in the universe. Basically existence will cancel itself out.

Shin: Ugh! I just want this to be over. *hits control panel*

Wang: NO!!!!

=== Newmanistan ===

Collins: ...meet. It’s fate. Newmanistan will take care of Daehanjeiguk, you know why, Meghan?

Traynor: Why?

Collins: Because the Rockets are peaking at the right time. They were all over Sorthern Northland...

=== The Control Box ===

Hwang: Wow, I'm amazed. I'm never insulting Shin ever again.

Shim: That's impressive. You made the machine work, Shin.

Wang: What the %$#^ just happened?

Shin: I don't know, but something worked.

SUPER: I've just gotten a report from Newmanistan. Some idiot just spontaneously exploded? Wanna explain that?

Shin: *amazed* Who just spontaneously exploded?

SUPER: Ummm.... some person named... "TJ Carter". A sportscaster doing some radio buzz. Apparently, he exploded while giving a broadcast about the Newmanistan-Daehanjeiguk Semifinal match in the DBC. He was pretty critical of the Rockets performance...

Shin: NOOOOO!!!

SUPER: Am I the only one not in the loop?

Wang: It's nothing. It's just... tragic.

SUPER: So what I am telling the Office? Random blurb of reality?

Wang: *nods* Sadly so.

SUPER: Hmm. That's going to be a hard sell.

Wang: Considering the alternatives, not really.

SUPER: Okay, well keep up the good work I guess.

Shin: NO!!!!

Shim: Relax, Shin! Sure, you killed the one guy in Newmanistan who actually likes the Imperial Team, but that's okay. They're all from Newmanistan anyway. And it's not like anyone is ever going to notice that he's dead, or just spontaneously exploded for that matter.

Hwang: My butt still itches.

Wang: You're going from intelligent to dumber than a slime mold.

Hwang: Slime molds don't get itchy butts while duct taped to the walls.

Shim: *talking to the guys* We're going to need some time alone. Shin really feels bad about this. *leaves with Shin*

Wang: *looking at Hwang* I'm not scratching your %$#^.

Hwang: Wang!!!!!!!!!

Meeting with the Emperor

Emperor: So you're telling me that they weren't Mujeongbu terrorists, trying to go on with their terms that Starblaydia should embrace anarchy, instead a bunch of nationalists?

Messenger: Yes, your majesty. It seems that there were two of them.

Emperor: Just two? Are you sure that they aren't like rabbits that multiply every time you turn your head?

Messenger: Yes, sire. You ask a lot of paranoid questions. You should relax, or end up like your father.

Emperor: *dumbfounded* Thanks for the advice?

Messenger: No problem.

Emperor: Umm. So who are these terrorists, and what should we do about them?

Marquis Pak Yu (Foreign Affairs): We should at least publicly condemn the attempt and offer to help resolve the crisis surrounding the kidnapping.

Emperor: Why?

Marquis Pak Yu: Because in other cultures, kidnapping victims make a lot of money off the ransom, as opposed to summarily beheading the victims and burning them in a giant heap of fire.

Emperor: Ah, I see. It would make sense...


Public Declaration by His Imperial Majesty

News today of an attempted terrorist attack in Starblaydia has certainly put a certain chill in the air, as the country embraced a good tradition. We are pleased that local law enforcement agents were able to apprehend the terrorists, although there is still hope for the displaced person, who is likely captive to these petty criminals. His Imperial Majesty's governments prays that the captors will take heart, release him, and seek to redress their errors by becoming servants to society rather than embrace nihilist practices of mass panic and destruction in pursuit for their dreams. As the action never occurred, we cannot condemn the terrorists actions, but we do deplore their intentions and again commend the efforts of local Starblaydi law enforcement personnel. Their courage was admirable, and one can hope that their efforts will emulated in the search for the lost victim.

Count Han Seungsu
韓昇洙伯
Academy of Foreign Affairs
http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/daehanjeiguk/foreign.png

Land de Wood Sports Di Bardini Cup Special

In other news, the Di Bardini Cup was suddenly inexplicably stricken from the records as having ever taken place. Rumors suggest that Starblaydi police - in an effort to avoid mocking double posts and copy cats - removed any mention of the alternative DBC, to which Land de Wood apparently subscribed to its DBC football updates. Ironically, the unofficial champions of the Di Bardini Cup happened to be Starblaydia.

Land de Wood Sports Di Bradini Cup Special
We apologise to the organisers for our latest typo, typed at some unearthy hour of the morning, the intern responsible will be sent to a sleep deprivation facility to learn how to type when he hasn't had enough sleep.

http://img152.imageshack.us/img152/2282/snpapereq5.png (http://imageshack.us)

SN go out without a bang... luckily

The quarter final of the Di Bradini Cup between Sorthern Northland and Newmanistan was never going to be about the football. Or at least once it became known that Inisnadún separatists Ríora Urraim dtí Inisnadún Náisiún were targeting the game. Previously unknown even in Sorthern Northland, the biggest damage they'd ever down previously was threatening to scratch the paintwork of Jimmy Sheridan's car. Yet somehow they became a major threat, they had the ways and means of planting and detonating bombs. And whether or not it worked, their first target was always going to get them attention, A quarter final of a major international tournament, if it went off hundreds, if not thousands of lives would be lost. It would be a statement of intent and a warning to the world. In fact despite failing, it was still a statement and intent and warning to the world. The group along with their allies, IKEA (Inisnadún Killing Enemies Army) now pose a large danger to Sorthern Northland and here they showed they aren't afraid to target foreign soil if there is a Sorthern involvement here. Much to the relief of many they may have failed in Starblaydia and seen two of their members given lengthy prison sentences, but they are by no means finished.

-----STOP PRESS-----

Border police on the northern coast have just announced three men believed to be members of RUIN have just been arrested after trying to enter Sorthern Northland. Bryn Evans who was taken hostage by the group was found unconscious in the hull of the boat the men were travelling one. He has been taken to hospital where doctors say he is in a stable condition. The men were tracked down after a group of seamen were found having fallen overboard in the Salmantic Sea and reporting that their boat had been stolen from them.

Hopeless SC


The country thereof


Months ago…


“If you think, even for a second…!”

“Bu–”

“I don’t know the way they do things over in Candelaria, but I’m buggered if I’m going t… Um. Bad turn of phrase, under the circumstances, but… You’re not getting yours anywhere near me, Organ, thank you very much!”

“But, I… I was onl–”

“Hello.”

“You’re damn lucky I’m not gonna squeal to the papers about this…”

“Oh come on, it’s hardly a crime! Er… It’s not a crime, is it?”

“Hello?”

“We’ve know each other for, what, five minutes, Trevor? God, what is wrong with y–”

“A-hem.”

Trevor Organ, the manager of the Hopeless SC national football team, and a Hopelessian female (and therefore a person who, by rights, should be largely irrelevant to the proceedings of an international football tournament), continued glowering at each other.

“Um. Hi? Mysterious black figure with no face over here!”

Organ turned slowly. “Yeah?” he said, quietly.

“Right. Um. D’you think you could see to it that you don’t play Tom Smith against Starblaydia?”

“Er… Okay…”

“Mm. Sorry, I’m not exactly being textbook enigmatic, I am? Just, um… Forget I was here. Ha. As if you weren’t going to anyway! Heh. A reference that makes sense only to the two of us, in the whole of creation. How very depressing. Um. Anyway, I’ll be back in a tick. Kinda.”

The figure bowed its head for a moment, stopped breathing, and then faded from view. The Hopelessian turned to Organ.

“……………….?” she asked, at length.

Organ shrugged. “God knows. But I’ll tell you this – she’s nowhere near as good as the other one.”


***


Hopeless SC


Months Ago…


“A little wine, Claudia?”

“That rather depends on you, Trevor.”

“None for me, thanks, I’m shamelessly hopping backwards and forwards through the space/time continuum.”

The football manager and the woman jumped, and turned sharply towards the black figure. It waggled its fingers a bit.

“Trevoooorrrr Orrrrgaaan… You wooon’t play Tom Smiiith against Starblaaaaaaaaydiaaa…”

Organ gulped. “I won’t?”

“I bloody well hope not, after all the effort I’ve gone to. This is the fourth time I’ve ANYWAY… Yes. Dooon’t play Tom Smiiith. But forget about that, until you see me neeext.”

“Right-o.”

“I must say, you’re being tiresomely calm about all this.”

“Would you like me to scream a bit?”

“I… No, no. Whatever.” The figure turned the woman. “I’d watch yer back if I were you, luv,” it muttered, before vanishing.

The Hopelessian turned to Organ.

“……………….?” she asked, at length.

Organ shrugged. “God knows. But I’ll tell you this – she’s nowhere near as good as the other one.”

Which was unfortunate, but he wasn’t to know.


***


Tabeck, Starblaydia


Wednesday…


“Paid loss!”

“There are all right over there, aren’t they?”

“Sail pods!”

“Only, there was all that natter about a bomb threat…”

“PISS LOAD!”

“Dave, I’m not sure you’ve really grasped the idea of this…”

“Spa Idols?”

“Again, no… Although that was a great show.”

“Yeah, I… Disposal! It’s obvious once you know, eh Jack?”

“What are they doing over there…?”

“These Starblaydis are crazy.”

The pair were suddenly aware of a genial face hanging merrily between their shoulders.

“Sooo… You fellas’re Irish Street natives, I’m betting.”

Jack and Dave shared a nervous glance.

“Scon are, thar’s roi. Me mucker ‘ere’s fra’ El din, though.”

“Ar.”

The Sortherner regarded them with renewed suspicion, but shrugged internally. He’d met Candelariasian-Irish-Northlandish Candelarian-Sortherners before, and had mentally registered them as Odd Bunch. He opened his mouth to enquire as to the health of Auntie Orla’s youngest after little Aisling’s appendix op; before he was dragged back into the throng of Sortherners building in number as kick-off drew closer.

Jack De Berlanger breathed a sigh of relief, before turning angrily to his companion.

“Whadidyagoan’saythatfor?”

“We wouldn’t have gotten out alive if we’d said we were, like, proper Candelariasians, would we? The wounds of the Rugby World Cup’re still raw, ‘member?”

Jack declined to mutter ‘if it wasn’t for you, you great fat oaf, we wouldn’t be risking life and limb by being here in the first place’. There didn’t seem much point. If they were going to be blown up anyway, they might as well part on good terms.

It had been Dave’s suggestion, after the pair were told in no uncertain terms that if they thought they were going to get into the C&M game in Karak D’Ragh without licenced accreditation they had another thing coming, that they travel to Tabeck and watch the Sorthern game instead. The Newmanistanians, Dave had stressed hopefully, were well worthy of the attentions of an investigative reporter. He couldn’t think of a reason, admittedly, but when had that ever mattered?

With Dave tagging along behind, Jack left his seat and, inching behind a flustered steward, moved into the Newmanistantian section. Two such beings, a man and a woman, spotted them, and bounced to their feet.

“Hi there!” the girl exclaimed cheerfully. “You guys Sorthern Northlandish? Only you’re a little lost…”

“Ar, so it is –” Dave began, before Jack shoved him in the ribs.

“No, we’re Candelariasian.”

Their two new friends narrowly avoided exploding in happiness.

“Say, that is just so wonderful, isn’t it, Chris?”

“It sure is, Breanne.”

“And it’s totally going to be our two countries in the final, I just know it!”

“’es,” a petrified Jack squeaked.

“I’d say we’re pretty well matched as well, wouldn’t you, Brea?”

“Oh, totally, but we’ve got our secret weapon!” the girl giggled.

“Are you talkin’ about Brett Carlson, Brea?”

“I sure am, Chris… Go the Capitals! Woo!”

“Woo,” Dave intoned timidly.

“But you know, if we do get to the final, we’re gonna crush you like the vermin that you are, and feast upon your marrow,” Breanne said brightly.

“That’s a possibility, yes, these people are terrifying,” Dave added to Jack, in broken Spanish.

“Well, it was lovely meeting you both, maintain eye contact, but back away. Slowly.”

The pair waited until they were at a safe distance before breaking into a run, and careering out of the stadium.

A tall, dark figure watched them go.


***


Karak D’Ragh, Starblaydia


Also Wednesday…


Quite how they were managing this was anyone’s guess.

Once upon a time, the Small Blues had thought nothing about scoring five or six past their counterparts from Sorthern Northland and the like. But that was a very different set of under-21s, not squads drawn from the ranks of relegated sides and mid-table reserve teams. Every game was a struggle for this lot – but the scary thing was, they were coming through. They’d won the group without dropping a point. With Peppi Elduayén, Hansson Kemp, Joel Mercado, Abdul Ibadulla… How the hell had that happened?

Starblaydia were the toughest test of all, though they’d expected nothing less from the hosts. C&M’s number one centre-half, Kemp, looked unlikely to get an instant move back into the CMSC after the Jukos’ relegation. Starblaydia’s, Ignacius Sverus, was by all accounts firmly in Albrecht FC’s plans in their bid to win back their title. The Candelariasians had the edge in age, but little else. These were the world champions’ young guns, after all.

Yet for now, battered and bruised though they were, they were holding the game to a goal apiece, with Niv Cohen’s twisting run and shot cancelling out a fine strike from yet another of the vast issue of the family of Simeone Di Bradini, peacebeuponhim. Wandering impotently on the left, Ryan Fattori glanced over to the bench, where Tom Smith was kicking his heels. What was the thinking behind that? James Falconer had offered nothing up front, and Abdul Ibadulla had been comfortably handled by Ryan’s new team-mate Sverus and the rest.

Grey Mendoza attempted to complete a pass to the Albrecht player but, not for the first time, Ricky England intercepted and swung a cross out to the Karak Ungor Chiefs player, whose every move with still being greeted with an appreciative roar from the home crowd. Arthur Wangen, who had nicknamed himself Why-Me? after a first half spent attempting to deal with the young guhnomnnum… ethnic Az-czzer, was easily push aside, but the young substitute Luis Primo’s shot went just wide.

Ryan turned in annoyance back to the sidelines, and frowned. “Gaffer…?” he whispered, largely to himself.

Trevor Organ was standing on the edge of his technical area, while the Yaforite fourth official attempted to convince him to move back. “I’m not listening to you,” Organ was mouthing, or something very like it. “I’m not… I’m going to send on Tom Sm–!”

The manager suddenly flung himself to the ground, before rolling up in a ball, clutching his privates. The Candelariasians who had noticed were looking over in concern, and even the Starblaydi on the ball was rolling it under his foot, a bemused expression on his face.

“Tom…” Organ breathed, “Go on… go on for James…”

Smith remained still. “Sir…?”

“Don’t listed to it! Go on and play your football, lad!”

The Arrigo Portuguese player looked towards David Stone, Organ’s assistant, who nodded silently and walked over to the linesman to provide the instructions. Kieron Tomlinson helped Organ to his feet and back to the bench.

“You okay now, mate…?”

“Yea, Kieron… I am…”

They watched as Smith took to the field and scampered up front. Within three minutes, the forward had beaten Nei Samba to the loose ball, and scored.

“Good call there, Trev,” Tomlinson told him, with forced jollity.

“Yes…” Organ smiled. “She’s nowhere near as good as the other one.”

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS, HAN EACH TRANSITION SMOOTHLY

By: Clint Peterson

Starblaydia- Four years ago, the Rockets and the Han met in the Di Bradini Cup 5 championship, and the day belonged to the Han. Four years before that, they met in the quarterfinals in the 4th Di Bradini Cup, and it would be the Rockets winding up victorious en route to their Di Bradini Cup 4 championship win. In each of those Cups, the Rockets and Han brought to Starblaydia mostly the same rosters as much of the Rockets from the 4th version played on the 5th team, and the entire Daehanjeiguk team from #4 played on #5. But players get older and move on. In the 6th Di Bradini Cup, both nations bring to Starblaydia a new group of young kids all hungry to make a name for themselves in the shadows of those that came before them. Success was not guaranteed. Their predecessors left behind a #1 and #2 ranking for the nations to enjoy, but not much else. While the outside world looks at Newmanistan and Daehanjeiguk and thinks “Ho hum, #1 and #2 are in the semis, no surprise there,” that’s really unfair to these kids. It’s not fair because they still had to earn it, work hard, and deliver. They did it, and now both are in the semis, with one heading to the final. Each nation could have had an easy excuse of “We’re in transition!”. But neither would allow that to be acceptable. Here they are, ready to go again. I had a chance to sit down with coach Brian Carson for one of my all-too-familiar one-on-one interviews, but before we get into it, let’s give this man some credit. Carson did a lot of great coaching to get the team to this point.

CP: I’m joined once again by the head coach of the Rockets, Mr. Brian Carson. Good morning to you once again.

BC: Good morning.

CP: Brian, you have a meeting with Daehanjeiguk once again. It’s the third time in a row that the nations will meet in the knockouts. You guys are getting a little history going here.

BC: Yeah we are. We haven’t really had much history with them elsewhere, except for when we come to Starblaydia. Obviously we want to avenge our loss in the final.

CP: Another final would be great, what do you guys have to do to get there?

BC: We just have to play our game. Other then that, I’m not going to get into the specifics of the game plan for obvious reasons, because their might be someone out there listening and wanting to press a button and make something bad happen, but we can’t go pretending we’re something we’re not. We have to win by playing Newmanistan football.

CP: I know that Kevin Collins told me he suddenly felt very nauseous the night after cursing the Han, so that’s not a bad idea, Brian.

BC: Hey, it happens to the best of us.

CP: I don’t think we can emphasize this enough. The fact that both you and the Han are back in the semifinals is a bigger achievement then a lot realize given you both have had a ton of roster turnover from the last time.

BC: It’s a testament to the youth programs in both countries. We develop their skills young, so when they get to this point, they are prepared.

CP: But you have to take some credit for that too.

BC: Not really, once they get to me they’ve been developed. It’s the youth programs that are developing these kids, and doing a fantastic job at it. From there, I pick who I feel are the best of the best, and then have the privilege of coaching highly skilled kids. Naturally, the selection process requires a consideration of the kids that aren’t just physically able to play in the Di Bradini Cup, but the ones that are mentally able as well. Being mentally prepared to come to Starblaydia, which is a long way away from Newmanistan, and be here for weeks to play in a highly competitive tournament, that’s not something that every kid is ready for.

CP: For the most part though, you’ve brought people here that were mentally prepared.

BC: Yeah, like you said, for the most part. It hasn’t been perfect, but the results have been good.

CP: Brett Carlson seems to be making a nice impression. You have to be thrilled with that.

BC: Absolutely, I’m thrilled with the way that he has adapted himself to this level of competition and is playing for us. He’s really kept his focus though and hasn’t succumbed to the pressure, both his own, and from the media.

CP: Is there any chance he could make the World Cup 42 Senior team? If not him, about anyone else from this team?

BC: He has a shot. As do others, I’m a little non-committal about that right now. After this, and during the Baptism of Fire I’ll begin to make those decisions.

CP: Ok Brian, thanks for your time.

BC: Actually, can I say a few more things real quick?

CP: Oh, sure, go ahead.

BC: First I want to thank the Starblaydi counterterrorism efforts for their heroic actions during our quarterfinal game, it was a situation that could have been very tragic. I also want to give my best to my coaching colleague Bryn Evans of Sorthern Northland. I heard that this morning his body was discovered alive and that he is now in stable condition. Bryn, I hope you recover quickly, get well soon, and maybe we can coach against each other in one of these things again they proper way in which we were supposed to have in the quarterfinal.

CP: I echo those sentiments as well, it’s great to know that he’s alive and stable.

BC: Without a doubt. No one should ever have to go through the ordeal that he had too.

CP: Well, it’s now time for us to head out. Brian, thanks, and good luck against the Han.

BC: Thanks Clint.

KNOW YOUR ROCKETS- Kyle Carrigan, MID, Olympia Gladiators
# ?? In a series

For some, football glory is a path that they realize they have a legitimate shot at as they get older. For others, it is already in the family. For Kyle Carrigan, football has always been part of his life ever since he was born. And that’s not an exaggeration as the family as pictures of him in Loudon Leopards gear going back to when he was a mere infant. In fact, his first official baby bottle had a Leopards logo on it. You see his brother Kevin, who is 15 years his senior is one of the greatest midfielders that the Empire has ever produced. Kevin Carrigan has played his entire career for the Loudon Leopards, and played for the Rockets on every senior team since the Baptism of Fire here in Starblaydia. But even Kevin was not the first in the family to be a professional football player. His father, Kirk, also played professionally. Kirk was also a midfielder, and while most of his career was spent with the Daytopia Racers, even he spent two years of his playing career in Loudon. His mother Katie was also an athlete, on the softball diamond.


So things were easy for Kyle, right? Well, not exactly. It’s kind of tough when you’re the youngest of seven children. Brother Kevin is the oldest, then between he and Kevin are his five sisters: Kara, Kaitlyn, Kelly, Kristen, and Katherine. He also didn’t get to see his brother much in person, because he was always travelling with the Leopards. Each of his sisters also played football, and often times the games in the backyard of their mansion-like house could have looked like a professional game. Kyle played it constantly, but his sisters seemed to enjoy picking on him more often then not, which is to be expected, and it wasn’t often that his brother Kevin was home to give him backup. Both of his parents also coached youth football, with each coaching their own gender. A little more of the focus went to the girls, because they were older and their were more of them, but eventually Kyle’s talents began to show. This began when he was around seven years old, and father Kirk jumped on the opportunity to develop his son exclusively, quitting the youth football team. “All while Kyle was growing up, I hoped that he would be able to have a good career as a football player but I never wanted to be one of those parents that forced it on their child. If he was going to do it, it had to be because he loved the game, and that he wanted to make it happen.” His mother Katie told us, while adding, “But all the games in the backyard playing against his older sisters, who know how to play the game too, made him a better player.” When Kevin Carrigan had his opportunities to be home as he juggled the life of being a superstar for the Leopards, he too thought that his brother could be able to have a successful career of his own, and whenever he was able, taught Kyle strategic information, and he was surprised by how much his little brother wanted to learn at a young age. He was showing the skill, as Kevin says, “Kyle looked like he definitely got the right genes early. But he wanted to be a smart player too, and that’s when it really clicked to me that he had what it takes. When someone that young wants to learn, that’s a good sign. I was real proud of him and really wanted to see him have a successful career of his own. And he wanted it too.”

Everything was rolling right along. It was inevitable, really. One day, Kyle Carrigan would be a great football player just like his brother, and just like his father. Nothing would get in his way. Except for the drunk driver going the wrong way on Interstate N273 when he was 11 years old. The Carrigan’s were coming home from one of Kevin’s games when out of no where, at just before midnight the drunk driver, going 93 MPH slammed into the Carrigan’s vehicle head on. His father Kirk, was killed in the accident. His older sister Kara was left paralyzed, and another sister, Kelly, was in a coma for three weeks before finally snapping out of it and surviving. Everyone in the car was injured in some way, including Kyle who had a broken shoulder and arm. Kevin Carrigan was not in the car. The drunk driver, then 51-year old Trevor Bardell, was not injured in the accident, though he was later sentenced to life in prison for his role. To this day, the memory of Kirk Carrigan lives strong in the hearts of the Carrigan family, and it is one of the big reasons when you see quotes from Kevin Carrigan during World Cup qualifying that he is such a religious man. He has devoted his career to his father. But there was one more thing he needed to do, for his dad, and that was to take his little brother under his wing. He did that, and Kyle, now, wanted it more then anything. You could see the hunger in his eyes. Before, he wanted it for himself and to make his family proud. Now, he too, wanted to dedicate his own career to his father. Mother Katie, reflects, “(fighting back tears). That fateful day. It’s amazing how short life can be. Kevin did a real great job assuming the role of a father and Kaitlyn and Kristen did whatever they could, but it was just so tough. I don’t know how many times I cried over the horrible situation. It made us strong as a family, but at the same time it was just one the worst things that could ever happen. I wouldn’t wish it on anyone.”

Like his brother, Kyle vowed to one day make his father proud and have a successful football career of his own. He worked hard before, but that was nothing compared to his commitment now. At 15, he was offered a contract by the Olympia Gladiators. Sure, he wanted to play in Loudon with his brother, but with Kevin’s advice he signed with Olympia. “Kevin told me that it may be best for me to establish my own identity in another city. I understood that. Olympia was a good team too, so I was happy to get an offer from them and sign.” He was on his way, and soon another dream would be realized. He was called by Brian Carson to play in the Di Bradini Cup, which he immediately accepted. He looks to have a great run here in Starblaydia for his country, his family, but more important, his father, Kirk. A picture of the two hangs in his locker, and before his game he gives it a lucky pat. He would love to win a championship, as it would make his family and his father so proud. Kyle knows that his father is up there watching, perhaps with the great Simeone Di Bradini nearby, from up above.

Semi-Final Scores
Elves Security Forces 3-2 Candelaria And Marquez
Newmanistan 2-0 Daehanjeiguk

Final Fixtures
Final: Elves Security Forces Vs Newmanistan
3PPO: Candelaria And Marquez Vs Daehanjeiguk

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS HEAD TO THIRD STRAIGHT FINAL

Starblaydia- The strong play of the Rockets during the 6th Di Bradini Cup continued last night as the team shut out the Han from Daehanjeiguk by the score of 2-nil, to head to their third straight final in the Di Bradini Cup. They will be taking on Valanora for the right to hoist the coveted trophy. The winner, no matter who it is, will join Candelaria And Marquez as the only two-time winners of the Di Bradini Cup. This semifinal was a bit about redemption, as the Rockets were well aware that it was the Han that defeated them in the final four years ago, and even though both teams were carrying new rosters, it was something that sure used as a motivation point for Brian Carson.

Newmanistan played very well from the opening whistle, immediately taking control of possession as they took control of the tempo of the game, first in winning the midfield battles. Kyle Carrigan and James Seidler were doing a great job of that, and the Han seemed a little unprepared for these too, and ultimately this allowed for Dirk Brogan to have plenty of room up the center of the pitch to get the ball to the attackers. This was going on in an effective manner, though the one area where the Han were sharp early was in their own back end, especially Jang Junhwan and Bae Youngjun. There were the main markers to Brett Carlson and kept him from having any real scoring chances. The first ten to fifteen minutes saw mostly the Rockets try to get balls down low to Carlson which would be cleared by the defense, or the Rockets taking a bad shot opportunity. Just one early shot got on target, but it was an easy 10th minute stop for Jeong Pilgyo. Brian Carson made a few on the fly adjustments, moving some people around on the offense to try and exploit the other defenders. Daehanjeiguk was not ready for this immediately, and they seemed somewhat confused on an 18th minute rush in which Brett Carlson and Jennifer Vilardi were charging down the field. Just as the defenders got comfortable with who they were taking, Carlson noticed an unchecked Kyle Carrigan sprinting down the right wing, and got the ball to him perfectly. Once it found the foot of Carrigan, he knew exactly what to do with it, and he gave the Rockets the 1-nil lead. Moments after the goal, Newmanistan kept good pressure on, and forced Pilgyo to have to make an impressive stop in the 24th minute. Slowly then, for a little while, the momentum began to shift and the Han were starting to get some quality runs upfield. It was the first time that the Rockets defenders were tested this greatly, but they were up to it. The Han seemed to think that it would be a good idea for them to concentrate their attacks on Alex Lampert, and that wasn’t a great idea. Lampert read out most of the plays, either stopping them himself or barking out directions to his teammates. The Han could not test keeper Matt Sullivan much, but they did get two shots on target, neither of which scared the goalkeeper. After withstanding about fifteen minutes of Daehanjeiguk rushes, the remainder of the half ended up in midfield.

With a one-nil lead at intermission, Brian Carson reminded his team of one fact. In the final of the 5th Di Bradini Cup, Newmanistan held a 1-0 advantage over Daehanjeiguk as well. With the way the Han came on strong towards the end of the first half, there was no question that they had the ability to get a quick goal in half number two, which is exactly the way it down in the final four years ago. This time he preached defense to his team to begin the second. Eventually, he wanted to press for the second goal, but did not want to do that right from the start. The players seemed focused and committed to making Carson’s plans work because they knew that they could be in their own final if they would just hold the lead.

The second half started just as we all knew that it would. Daehanjeiguk went on the attack, and did so aggressively, but they seemed to get a little frustrated by how well the Newmanistan defense was positioned. James Seidler, too, started to get in the heads of the Han with his rough tackling techniques, including two big ones between minutes 48 and 52 that got all the fans wearing the sky blue and white cheering in the stands. Yu Giheung, instead of calling out signals to his team, spent a good five minutes complaining for a yellow card to be issued to Seidler, especially for the 52nd minute tackle on Pak Gyuseon. At exactly the hour mark, the Han had their best chance to tie up the game on a nice run by midfielder Seong Sammun. It was a rare moment in which the Rockets defense broke down, and he got an excellent opportunity for himself. Sheldon Talcott made him rush his shot about a half second earlier then he would have wanted, and due to that his shot with may have been directly struck in the top left corner, sailed an inch over the crossbar. On the ensuing goal kick, the Rockets got a great counter attack going. Sullivan delivered a perfect goal kick to Dirk Brogan, who got the ball to James Seidler. Sammun was a little hesitant to play too close to Seidler, perhaps fearing his aggressiveness, and James noticed that. Retrieving the pass, he sprinted around Sammun and charged upfield. A cross then got delivered to Brett Carlson for a header. Nothing but net!! In the 62nd minute, the scoreline now led two-nil in favor of the Rockets, and the party seemed to be on in the stands amongst those rooting for Newmanistan. The suddenness of the goal was a true dagger, and it took the Han a little while to respond to it, and once they did, they were met by the solid defense that had stymied them all game long. Between minutes 76 and 81, Carson made defensive substitutions to make it even more frustrating for the opponent. Eventually, the minutes ticked off, and the Rockets had defeated the Han by the score of 2-nil.

With the victory, a showdown with Valanora is in store to determine the winner of the 6th version of the prestigious Di Bradini Cup. The nations met in the group stage of the 5th Cup and then again in the semifinal. The game four years ago that sent the Rockets to final was a classic, one in which Newmanistan won by the score of 3-2. The scoreline was the same in the Rocket’s group stage win. But now, it’s all about the glory of the Cup. One of the two teams will win it for the second time in their nation’s history.

Here is some post game reaction:

Carson: “In all phases of this game, we were on top form. I had confidence that we would be, because we had a great series of practices leading up to this contest as their seemed to be an extra desire there to eliminate this particular nation. I am really proud of the team, and look forward to meeting Valanora. We would love to win the Cup again.”

Talcott: “I think we caught them my surprise in the back end, maybe because other Newmanistan teams have had the reputation for being a little more offensive-minded. Our team now has a great defensive focus, and also found that we were winning much of the physical battles with them, so naturally our more physical players took advantage of that whenever they could.”

Lampert: “They seemed convinced that I was a weak link of the team early on. I don’t really know why they did that, but I took that as kind of insulting. Eventually they gave up on it. I think not only did we outplay them physically, I believe we also dominated the game mentally, in terms of our strategy and focus.”

Seidler: “The Han are another team that doesn’t enjoy playing physical football. I eat teams like this for breakfast. Valanora? Now that’s a team I know can match us physically.”

Carlson: “We were great in all areas of the pitch, attacking, midfield, and on defense, in my opinion, in terms of our execution. We didn’t dominate, and Daehanjeiguk had their moments, but we always seemed to have an answer when one was needed.”

(The team gathers in the hotel meeting room)

Carson: Good morning once again, guys, I have some good news to start off with.

Talcott: What’s up?

Carson: Back at home, the conflict is over. The Empress came to an agreement this morning with the other leaders on a split of the oil proceeds.

Carlson: Excellent.

LaFave: Indeed, very nice to know.

Seidler: Nah, not really. We’re just gonna get jipped out of 100% of the proceeds, man, we should have nuked them off the map.

Carson: Well, it’s over. However you choose to look at it, good thing, bad thing, is up to you. At least we can all breath easier now knowing that there is peace.

Lampert: Is the Empress going to come here then?

Carson: No, she can’t make it, still she has to sign documents and do other things someone in her position needs to.

Talcott: That’s fine, we don’t need here. What we have right here in this room as all we need.

J Vilardi: Hey, you know Jeremy McAllister sent me a long e-mail wishing me, and the rest of you, good luck, I just thought that was so cool.

Carson: Yes, I’ve talked to Jeremy, and to many other players from our Di Bradini 4 team, and in fact, many of them will be in attendance for the final. But I want this game to be about all of you. You guys earned it, in getting this far. And I know that you have it in you to beat Valanora. They’re good, but we can beat them.

Carlson: So who do you think the neutral fans are going to root for? I’ve heard there’s quite a Valanora-Starblaydia rivalry, especially on the senior circuit.

Talcott: Yeah, but they may be getting sick of seeing us in the final now, too.

Carlson: True. (Laughs)

Carson: The crowd will probably be 50-50, both us and Valanora will have large contingents of fans in attendance.

LaFave: I like what you said before about this being our Cup. Look, I like our senior team players as much as the next guy or girl. The World sees this as our 3rd consecutive final. But for nearly all of us. This is our first. We’ve never won that Cup.

J Vilardi: And the couple of us that are holdovers from the 5th Di Bradini team, definitely want vindication. We beat Valanora twice there, we can’t be intimidated by the prestige of their senior team

Carson: You all seem to have a great focus. I don’t need any wise words. Let’s just go out there and execute, and if we do one of two things will happen. The first thing would be that we would take our place in history aside the group that was here eight years ago. And if that doesn’t happen, sadly, the second thing would be if we were to lose, that we lost while playing to the best of our ability, for 90 minutes, plus stoppage time.

Talcott: In the end, everyone, that’s what it’s all about. For Newmanistan!

Team: FOR NEWMANISTAN!!!

Valanora Times
Spread Your Wings

A month of competition has taught me one thing, that no matter how poor or great you think you are, it matters not. Trully, you can be one of the greatest individiuals in your field, and still it is not what trully matters. What matters is what you do with your life and how you wish to be percieved. Friendship, charity, humilty, and patience are all values that we admire in individuals, yet they are lacking too often these days, lost somewhere in the hussle of trying to get the task done. So when I look at these twenty-three kids who have come together as friends, caring not how they performed in this competition, it gives me some hope that we are not completing losing who we are to progress.

It is then somewhat bitter sweet that many of these yougnsters shall not see each other again after this final match here in Starblaydia. It was the VFA's goal to get many of these talented kids playing in foriegn leagues, and they accomplished that goal. Several of the most promising are heading to Cafundeu, where hopefully that level of competition will shape them into future national teamers. Ories has made history by becoming the first Vanorian player to make it into the Ad'ihani league. Delera and Anwamanë bolster the contingent of those in the Candelarias hoping to bring our two nations closer. Yet, for as close as they have become, to see them being seperated is a tad on the depressing side.

I think the biggest story though is how wonderful of a job that Anárion has done, following the disaster of the Roki's time at the helm. It might be that he has done such an excellent job here that he might be making the huge job to full national team manager, as Devida Cal has recently rejected the offer citing his commitment to Dalinn. It would be a very good fit for the Marauders as Anárion runs a similar system to the one that has guided them to four straight top three finishes. The question is whether or not Anárion would desire to leave his position for how turbulant the senior side's position is.

Regardless, there is still a match left for the Marauders to contend with. The dominating youth program of Newmanistan is once again in the final, and looking to become the second nation with multiple titles, alongside Candelaria and Marquez. It is a similar situation with the Marauders, as they took the inagural tournament's title, where Newmanistan's title was their debut in the fouth edition. The mini Marauders have tapered off since the third Di Bradini, and it is clear that the Rockets are the favorites here. The crowd will not be able to play favorites for either side, as the hardcore fans would have seen Newmanistan win the Baptism of Fire, but there are rumor's that recently inducted World Cup Hall of Famer Leandro Perheira and super winger Jaime Kuu might be in attendance, which would give the Vanorians some support. Honestly, it is a clash of titans, with whoever has the luck of the day going to be crowned champions, and I would not want it any other way.

Article by Ron Santapa

Candelaria


Not entirely sure where


It really doesn’t matter, to be honest


I can make somewhere up, if it’d make you feel happier


No? Alright. I’ll just crack on, then


Somewhere in Candelaria


Years Ago…


Definitely years ago, this time


“Trevor Organ?”

“Gnn-hn-un!”

“Er. Right. So, I don’t suppose you’d care to do me a little favour, would you?”

“Gnnnn!”

“Er. Right. It’s only, all I need you to do is, give Richard Arnold a chance in the semi-final?”

“Gn-nn-nn-NN!”

“Not from the start, or anything, obviously. Just, y’know… If you need to throw a substitute on… He’s your man. Please.”

“Mmn-gn! GNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNNN!”

“Ah. You’ve dropped your duck. He’s a fine duck, isn’t he? Would you like Mr Duck back? Tell you what, I’ll give you Mr Duck if you promise to play Richard Arnold.”

“Gnh?”

“Excellent. There you pop.”

The black figure bent over the cot and presented the infant with the duck, whose name, by common consent, was Crispin, though this fact is entirely incidental.

“Why on earth would anyone call a baby Trevor?” it wondered vaguely before flickering out of existence.

The mysterious black figure, not the stuffed duck.

I feel I should make that as clear as possible.

***

Penningworth, Starblaydia

A smidge prior to the C&M versus Valanora semi-final


“Please… I just want you to listen. That’s all I ask.”

It was like watching a different man. Big Trev Organ, the former Albrecht FC goalkeeper, the leader of men. Not dithering old Jerry Huntick, who Niv Cohen and Arthur Wangen and Gary Mills and a few of the others remembered from the last Di Bradini Cup. Organ may have had plenty of failings, as a man and as a coach, but you could never accuse him of not being able to hold a dressing room to attention.

But between Ameriganistan and now, he seemed to have aged by about a decade. He groaned when he moved, big black nan bruises obvious whenever his shirt rippled in the wind, and he sighed before and after opening his mouth.

“I just… I just want all of you to forget any advice you’ve ever been given. About this game,” he added, to a room of nonplussed stares. And the occasional nod of recognition.

“So, if I have the ball after beating Ories and find myself in the penalty area, I shouldn’t cross to Lelliot?” Grey Mendoza, the left-back, whispered.

“No. She won’t even be playing,” Organ said stoutly.

“Oh, thanks,” Lelliot-Leigh Sodje muttered.

“Not from the start, anyway,” Organ added kindly. “I’ll… I’ll decide for myself what subs we use.”

“Of course you will, gaffer,” James Falconer said smoothly.

“And, um,” George Jones raised a tentative hand, “if I have a one-on-one with Ciryatan, and I might be in a position to score, but I’ve got other options… I shouldn’t just ignore everyone else and put it to his left?”

“Just… Just do whatever you think best, George. All of you. Just don’t… don’t listen to them. Y’hear me? Concentrate on your own game. We win this, beat… well, Newmanistan, let’s be honest; and then we’re off to the Olympics with our heads held high. Won’t that be wonderful?”

***

Penningworth, Starblaydia


Eighty minutes on the clock


Desmond


Trevor Organ held his knees. It was two-two. It had been quite a game, from a neutral’s perspective; the Small Blues taking the lead when Adbul Ibadulla bounded through the Vanorian defence after barely ten minutes. Anwamanë, the stupidly quick new Green Island striker, had then turned the match on its head either side of half time. Ricardinho has almost put the game beyond the Candelariasians’ reach, before Tom Smith had been knocked down on the edge of the box, and Niv Cohen had swung in the free-kick that bounced in off Hansson Kemp’s head. Valanora had been the better side, but they were spent. The momentum was surely C&M’s now.

George Jones beat Daeron Srion to Reuben Blakeman’s long punt up field. He was in the area. Smith was ahead of him, but the Arrigo Portuguese forward was still hobbling after his own encounter with the A.F.F. defender. Only Fëanáro Ciryatan stood between Jones and three-two. He lined up his shot. And dummied, and played in Smith, who shot high and wide.

“NO!”

“It was a good chance.”

“He should have scored.”

“He made his choice. Perhaps if he hadn’t had you whispering in his ear at one of the most profound moments of his life…”

“She would have killed him. I saved him, I gave him a little nudge in the right direction. He could’ve at least listened… He’d have scored…”

Trevor Organ stayed staring straight ahead, while David Stone over on his right busied himself sorting out the substitute for Smith.

“I’m tired,” Organ whispered, in the earshot only of the black figure standing to his left. “All my life. All my life I’ve had to deal with this. With you. With her. Have you any idea what that’s like?”

“Ask a silly question…”

“I can’t be bothered any more. I just can’t. I don’t want to listen to you! Either of you!”

“But we’re so close, Trevor! This is now, this is it! These moments! This is what makes all… the… difference…”

The figure’s disembodied voice drained away as it turned towards the fourth official’s scoreboard. There was a 9 for Tom Smith. And there was a 21.

“Trevor, no! I said Richard Arnold! He’s number nineteen! Send on Falconer if you must, just don’t…”

They watched together as Smith limped off and Lelliot-Leigh “Ella” Sodje bounded onto the pitch. The first female striker in C&M colours. It had taken almost five Di Bradini Cup 6 games, but finally…

“Why, Trevor?”

Organ stayed staring straight ahead, and the figure followed his gaze across the pitch. There, amongst the stands, sat a black figure. Smiling from ear to ear.

“Oh, you can’t listen to her! Nothing she says is true! She doesn’t understand, she thinks she has to undo everything I… Trevor, please, I’m begging you, change the substitution. Say you’ve made a mistake! I can’t go through this again…”

There was pleading in its voice, but Organ kept his eyes on his new forward. “She might score here,” he whispered.

“She won’t,” the figure accurately predicted, as a weak shot skid past the left upright. “But she will. In a moment. And again. And again, and again, and again, and again. And she won’t stop, not ever. Not until it’s far, far too late. And I’m sorry. But I can’t go through this again.”

Organ glanced up to his left for the first time, and reached out too late.

And suddenly, they all saw it. Not just in those dark moments, not just whispering, telling them to score, to miss, to pass, to hold on to the ball, in a game in Starblaydia, years from now. Seventy-thousand men and women and elves in Penningworth, saw the black figure race across the pitch, storm into Lelliot-Leigh Sodje as she readied a shot, and pull the girl to the floor.

The elvish players, who were more used to this sort of stuff, reacted first and piled towards the pair. But somehow… somehow they couldn’t go any further. Because only Lelliot-Leigh Sodje was there, on the ground, struggling, alone. They and the Candelariasians and the crowd watched as a second figure ran down from the opposite side of the stadium, towards the fight in the centre of the pitch, and swing a punch at the first. And they wanted to help, to break it up, but how could they, when really, when really, there was only one young woman there, fighting against herself.

And then the first figure drew a knife, and stabbed the second figure deeply in the chest, and killed her.

***

A steward reached out and grabbed the figure around the throat, because suddenly, he could. And it all seemed so natural, and everyone wondered why the officials hadn’t reacted sooner. And, as Lelliot-Leigh Sodje couldn’t walk, she was substituted barely five minutes into her debut, for Richard Arnold. The game finally restarted, and Taikinu Ories scored, and Valanora made the final.

Trevor Organ wasn’t there to see it. He bounded after the team of stewards, and pleaded for leniency. And, for a moment, they left them alone together. For the first time in his life, that he could remember, because Crispen was but a distant memory, he looked into the figure’s eyes. For the first time in fifty years, she had eyes.

“Lelliot…” he whispered.

“I couldn’t go through it again,” the black figure whispered back. “You don’t know how long… And every time, she’s there…”

“But…”

“If she… if I scored… I’d have scored in the final too, you know. And a hundred more times. I’d be a national heroine on a scale never seen before. I know. I’ve lived it.”

“I don’t…”

“Of course you don’t. But you will. Eventually. But I couldn’t let her score. And I couldn’t let her let her score…”

“But… It’s over now, right? She… You, didn’t score. You stopped her. We won’t make the final. It’s over? I’ll never have to deal with you again? None of this squad will? It’s all over?”

She nodded. “After a fashion. But she’s still alive, she’ll still be quite a player in years to come. But I’ll be there to stop her. And she’ll be there to stop me from stopping her, every day, forever… Frankly, it gets awfully tedious after a couple of millennia.”

“But it’s different now, surely. You’ve got a face, for one thing…”

“Hm? Oh, yeah, that’s just ‘cos there’s only one temporally displaced Lelliot-Leigh Sodje in this particular timeframe after I dealt with t’other one, so the imps in charge of the correct running of the universe can handle my presence a little better. It won’t last. They don’t realise, y’see… All the Lelliots. They’re always too young. They think it’s me they have to stop…”

“But I don’t understand, why does it matter so much if she turns out to be a great player, I don’t…”

But the figure was already fading from view, and when Trevor reached out, he caught only dust.

He turned away, and almost tripped over two men standing sheepishly in a corner.

“Don’t mind us,” one said brightly. “We’re only… um…”

“I honestly don’t care,” Trevor muttered, brushing past them and back down the tunnel.

Jack and Dave glanced at each other. In the last twenty-four hours, they’d seen elves, dwarves, an uncensored news report on the signing beans and, now, a disappearing woman with more than a passing resemblance for the Jerusalem United striker Lelliot-Leigh Sodje, plus about fifty years. The biscuit had been well and truly taken.

“Mornin’.”

The pair turned to see a tall, dark man in a suit lounging against the wall.

“Um. Hiya,” Dave ventured.

“So, by my reckoning, in the last twenty-four hours you two fine young gentlemen have seen dwarves, elves, a disappearing woman, and more signing beans that you can shake a stick at, no?”

They nodded.

“And how do you two feel about all that?”

“Not wonderful,” Jack admitted. “Um. Aren’t you thingy?”

“¿Que?”

“The, whaddayacallit, chair of the all-party parliamentary group on Rushmori agricultural subsidies?”

The man beamed. “I knew I was going to like you, Mr De Berlanger. Tell me, how would you like to bring down the very fabric of Candelariasian society and change the face of our nation for all eternity?”

Jack nodded. “On the whole, I’d be quite keen on that, sir,” he admitted.

“Excellent. How do you feel about sock puppets?”

Final Results
Final: Elves Security Forces 3-1 Newmanistan
3PPO: Candelaria And Marquez 2-0 Daehanjeiguk


Congratulations to Elves Security Forces, who take their second title, some twenty years after their original and inaugural victory in the tournament.

I think, judging by the winners these last six cups and the make-up of the Semi Finals, we know who the four strongest U21 sides in the world are!

THE ROCKET REPORT

SECOND BEST.... AGAIN

Starblaydia- It's a good thing the Rockets defeated Land de Wood in the World Lacrosse Championship recently, or else this would have become the 6th consecutive final that a team from Newmanistan had made, that we lost. Instead, it will just be five out of six. The championship match between Newmanistan and Valanora to determine the victor of the 6th Di Bradini Cup has just gone final, and it would be those pesky Elves notching the victory, by a scoreline of 3-1. The lone Rockets goal game in the 37th minute, off the foot of Brett Carlson, a goal that at the time had tied the game up at one.

So the handshakes with Valanora are done, and they will celebrate long into the night as their nation celebrates their second Di Bradini Cup, coming twenty years after they won the first ever such Cup in the U-21's "Di Bradini" era. They've earned it, and behalf of all of us at the Rocket Report, we would like to congratulate them on their championship. For Newmanistan, a runner up finish isn't that bad, really. They came to Starblaydia as a team in transition, going from one group to this new group. They have made three straight finals, and in four years, when lucky number seven comes along, much of this roster will return.

Hwang: WTF?

Wang: Well, that's what happens when you disappear for a while. Things fall apart.

Shin: What do mean things just fall apart?

Wang: Look, the Han lost their last two matches. Singing beans are all the talk in C&M, and for some odd reason, Hwang isn't taped to a wall.

Hwang: But I like that.

Wang: So you'd rather be not taped and have the Imperial Team lose?

Hwang: ...

Shim: It's a trick question! State above self!

Hwang: ...

Shin: Howzabout this? We'll paint Wang pink and tape him to the wall.

Wang: Umm. No, let's play something else.

Shin: It wasn't a question. *whacks Wang with a frying pan*