Oxen Cup SEVEN Signups [Archive]

Land de Wood

10-07-2008, 23:53

Land de Wood News are pleased to bring you exclusively our squad for the forthcoming Oxen Cup. Andrew Wood has got the squad down to 22 players and has decided not to name himself amongst the players. The clubs of these players have been told they should be proud to release their players for national duty despite the domestic league about to kick off.

The team expect to play a 4-1-3-2 formation with an attackive (+1) style.
Starting 11
Patrick Clemence plays GK for New Dorset Stars and is 27 years old
Is approaching the peak of his career, expected to be number 1 for the next few years.
David Aimer plays RB or CB for Coalfires United and is 30 years old
Right footed defender at the peak of his career.
Gary Lewis plays CB for Broxton United and is 29 years old
Tall centre back, great to have around for set pieces at either end of the pitch. Has just been confirmed as captain.
Stephen Sterland plays LB or CB for New Dorset Stars and is 32 years old
Possible just past his peak as a player, has moved into the centre of defense recently as he has lost that yard of pace he used to have
Woodrow Derby plays LB for Broxton United and is 23 years old
Up and coming left back with plenty of pace to overlap the winger, just has to make sure he gets back in time, possibly better as a wingback in a 3-5-2 system.
Richard Butty plays DM for Broxton United and is 30 years old
Tough tackling defensive midfielder. Expect him to get stuck in.
Aaran Whitemore plays RW for Woodhampton Rovers and is 24 years old
Good crosser of the ball. Denis Whitemore's brother.
Larry Derby plays CM for Southern Village and is 30 years old
A centre midfielder at the peak of his game. Woodrow Derby's cousin.
Stephen Redrow plays LW or CS for Northern Lights and is 26 years old
Whether playing down the left wing, or up front can be relied on to put the effort in, but not one for the spectacular, still you need consistent players at major tournaments.
Steve Eclair plays CS for Broxton United and is 31 years old
Arguably past his best, this striker needs to impress this tournament if he wants to stay in the squad
Gary Hoggins plays TM for Southern Village and is 29 years old
Reliable target man at the peak of his career. Equally happy heading the ball to a team mate running into space as heading the ball into the back of the net.

Subs
Jonathon Horse plays GK for Wood Town and is 30 years old
Reliable understudy.
Gary Nicol plays GK for Broxton United and is 34 years old
Is just passed his peak
Ray Hamil plays RB for Broxton United and is 21 years old
Young right back ready, likes to get down that right flank and overlap the winger.
Richard Wilson plays CB for Wood Town and is 21 years old
Young centre back with a promising future.
Stephen Diddon plays CB or DM for Wood Limited and is 23 years old
Centre defender equally happy at anchoring the midfield. Expected to make some tough tackles and will do well to escape without a yellow card this tournament. His commitment and passion make him a likely future captain as he matures.
Kevin Wallace plays RW or LW for New Dorset Stars and is 21 years old
A winger with tons of pace, certainly one for the future but may be a useful substitute to terrorise tired defenders.
Gary Workhorse plays CM for New Dorset Stars and is 32 years old
A box to box player, only question mark would be whether he still has the stamina to get around the park as much as he used to.
David Clemance plays CM or AM for Wood Limited and is 24 years old
Centre midfielder who likes to get forward. Just as likely to score a goal as set one up.
Gary Stering plays LW for Woodhampton Rovers and is 23 years old
Good, fast left winger, needs to a bit more consistent though.
Ray Horse plays AM or CS for Woodhampton Rovers and is 30 years old
Attackive midfielder at the peak of his game, can be switched to attack as a second striker. Expect him to get some assists but needs to improve his own goals per game ratio.
Richard Higgins plays CS for Wood Limited and is 21 years old
Young pacey striker, another player who may be good in the second half against tired defenders, now if he could only improve his shooting ability he'll be a star. Needs to improve his stamina if he's to make it as a starter.

Please note our opponents may if they get to the news before we do(i.e.RP first),
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod scoring events N
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out red cards to my players Y
Godmod other events N

West Zirconia

11-07-2008, 01:39

The West Zirconian FA has appointed Roy Hazell, manager of twice-champions Banks, to coach the inaugural West Zirconian national side as it makes its international début in the Oxen Cup.

The starting eleven will be as follows:

GK Steve Gray (Banks)
DL Ben Phillips (c) (Moorcroft City)
DC Glenn Charlton (Houghton Kestrels)
DC Michael Faulkner (Markham)
DR Paul Paterson (Bradley Hornets)
ML Ian Hawthorne (Civil Service)
MC Edward French (Banks)
MC Gareth Doyle (St. Martin University)
MR Anthony McGowan (Markham)
FW Steve Griffiths (Banks)
FW Matthew Love (Banks)

The remainder of the squad is as follows:

Goalkeepers: John Hopkins (St. Andrew's), Tom Lyons (Civil Service)

Defenders: Ryan Gregory (Bradley Hornets), Nathan Winterton (Civil Service), Matt Evans (Markham).

Midfielders: Lee Pritchard (Banks), Patrick Williams (St. Martin University), Damion Hyde (New Toronto).

Forwards: Martin Forster (Moorcroft City), Mark Young (St. Andrew's), Jerome Bennett (Taylor's Cross)

And now for the OOC bit:
In the event of opponents RP-ing first, the following applies:

Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod scoring events N
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out red cards to my players Y
Godmod other events N

Qazox

11-07-2008, 04:39

So this isn't going to start for another 11 months, or is that Qazox time?

(OOC: Well I guess you're not finishing 2nd again, who's the wiseass now? ;))

Jeruselem

12-07-2008, 13:33

Jeruselem's roster

"The Princesses"

Formation: 4-4-2
Style Modifier: +2 or +1 in reality for WC41

Technical Manager: Dazza Dallas

Coach: Sister Marsha
* Coach of the winning Turtle Cup I team
* Assistant Coach of World Cup 40 and 41
* Coach of Cup of Hockey 6

Security staff: John Edwards
* Former Inquisitor turned private security contractor to the Jeruselem FA
* Explosives expert

Official JGN reporters
* Kate Sallad
* Kara Kool

GK (M,17) - Rajkie Salam - Father owns a Mosque
GK (F,23) - Shay Rushdie - Works as a poodle trainer part-time
GK (F,28) - Jane Darian - An orphan after parents were killed by a car bomb. Took up football to stop from being bored and earn some money. Her hero is the Princess Skate and wants to be as rich as Dazza (CAPTAIN)

DEF (F,20) - Jacinta Sallad - Big Dallas fan, nicknamed Jacinta Dallas. Looks like a Jacinta Dallas clone.
DEF (M,23) - John Kranzoy - A hard worker in defense. Not the most skillful but never gives in to a challenge.
DEF (F,21) - Dazzarina Intern - Badly behaved around the opposite sex, Nymphomaniac like the real Dazza.
DEF (M,20) - Geovanni Dallas - One of Debbie Dallas's sons. The only Dallas in this team.
DEF (F,27) - Pauline Boshoba - Party animal and professional "Mouse dancer". Often told off to stop acting like Skate.
DEF (M,26) - Joshua Frakes - They just call him "Jesus" for his miraculous efforts to stop goals

MID (F,19) - Beth Bootin - Voted cheerleader most likely to sleep a football team once
MID (F,16) - Sally Kool - One of Kara's many many cousins.
MID (F,22) - Kate Sallad - Big Dallas fan, nicknamed Kate Dallas. Looks like Kate Dallas clone too (VICE CAPTAIN)
MID (M,24) - Jamie Hyneman - A man with brains and brawn in the midfield.
MID (M,28) - Adam Savage - Likes blowing stuff up in his free time
MID (M,26) - Flak Sho - Ariddian Jew who moved to Jeruselem. Princess Jacinta Dallas's husband.
MID (F,20) - Sister Hanna Josh - A nun who wants to prove female football players aren't all sluts

STR (M,27) - Shaka Hislop - African tribal football player from a small village called Jerusalem
STR (F,22) - Jennifer Sloan - Black belt in Karate already.
STR (M,27) - Olk Silverstein - Aggressive Zionist striker who has a tendency to beat up refs.
STR (M,26) - Coss Cohen - Son of football club owner who likes the glory of scoring goals and being a star. Thinks he's better than Kara Kool. Married to Jacinta Sallad.

RP Permissions
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events Y
RP injuries to my players N
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players N
Godmod Other Events N

Dallas count = 1
Sallad count = 2

and

The strip!
http://img406.imageshack.us/img406/4757/jeruselemwc38cw6.png

Cafundeu

12-07-2008, 19:15

CCFM'S LIST OF PLAYERS FOR THE OXEN CUP

In this Oxen Cup, the CCFM will send the B National Team again. Success only came in the first edition of the cup, but supporters are confident that the Monopolists can make a good campaign under the command of coach Júlio Mercegues, who is now coach of Petardos S/A. The list still has many players that can get their chance to go to the National Team.

See the list:

No.- Name (rating, team, NT experience level)

NT exp. level: * - no previous experience / ** - former U-21 or B team / *** - former main NT

Goalkeepers:

1- Francisco KARDEC (B, América, **)
12- Lazlo Vercilo SALATHIËL (B, Central United, **)
22- Cid VINIL (C, Vila Velha, **)

Full-Backs:

2- Leandro VITAL (A, Petardos S/A, ***)
6- RENILDO Carvalho Peixoto (A, Petardos S/A, **)
14- CÍCERO Bandrindes Rossi (C, Cafundó do Juta, **)
16- Vítor Tukambé Sampaio "ÍNDIO" (B, SC Lasft, ***)

Defenders:

3- Rick TOLEDO (B, Khalmar-Tijhus, **)
4- JOÃO CARLOS Alvorada Siqueira (B, SC Lasft, *)
13- ALMIR Derszinsky (C, América, *)
23- LIONEL Pereira Gonzaga Dias (B, Atlético Insular, ***)

Defensive Midfielders:

5- Fábio Germano Santos "FABINHO" (A, Central United, **)
7- WÁGNER Sanchez Gonzaga "PAULISTA" (B, Galáxia, **)
15- WILSON "MAGRÃO" (B, plays in Kura-Pelland, ***)
20- Fágner Monza de ABREU (C, A.F.F., **)

Offensive Midfielders:

8- Carlos MAROSSI (A, Khalmar-Tijhus, **)
11- Sílvio Cândido Bertrandt "SILVINHO" (A, Petardos S/A, ***)
17- Reginaldo ROSSI (B, Galáxia, **)
19- Reinaldo FRANCO (C, Atlético Jutense, *)

Attackers:

9- FAUSTO Hernandez (B, A.F.F., **)
10- ARISTÓTELES Bueno (A, Clube Imperial, **)
18- Ricardo Borges "RICARDÃO" (B, plays in Newmanistan, **)
21- HUBERT Munch (B, Central United, **)

Coach: JÚLIO MERCEGUES (Petardos S/A)

Main formation: (style is +2)

------------------------------Kardec------------------------------
-----Vital-----------João Carlos-----Toledo-------------Renildo-----
-----------------------------Fabinho------------------------------
-----Wágner Paulista----------------------------Silvinho------------
-----------------------------Marossi-------------------------------
----------------Fausto------------------Aristóteles----------------

Dancougar

13-07-2008, 05:37

As promised, your Kingdom of Dancougar College All-Stars!

Starters in bold.
Players who have declared for the D-League Super Draft in italics.
Class status as of upcoming fall.

GK Heath Vaccarino (University of Fujiwara, graduated)
GK Charlie Hughart (Reyes Academy, graduated)

D Joseph Cecilia (Concannon College, graduated)
D Chad Fey (Reyes Academy, senior)
D Fritz Heckendorf (Granger Island College, graduated)
D Jiro Ieyasu (University of Fujiwara, senior)
D Johnnie Kingsford (Nara Collge, junior)
D Alec Penoyer (Monagham State College, senior)
D Ando Tomokazu (Akasaka University, junior)

M Gus Brittain (Dancougar Royal Academy, graduated)
M Fritz Eisenbach (Granger Island College, senior)
M Shigekazu Hayashi (Akasaka University, senior)
M Tetsuo Kawaguchi (Konoha Academy, senior)
M Dwayne Landro (Port Royal University, junior)
M Jared Matthews (Dancougar Royal Academy, graduated)
M Aaron Sundling (Negley Run Academy, senior)
M Alexei Voronzoff (Barynsk College, junior)

F Edmund Brinks (University of Shiba, junior)
F Blaine Culverhouse (University of Lunarossa, graduated)
F Glen Rotondo (Pollock College, junior)
F Kano Saito (Hazuki State University, senior)

Style is +1. RP permissions are yes to all, modulo, like, destroying everything.
Edit: Dancougar is +2 beginning with matchday 4 vs Milchama

Jeruselem

13-07-2008, 07:36

OOC - Oi Dancougar, quadriple post! :p

Dancougar

13-07-2008, 08:19

OOC - My bad, it kept saying the request timed out...

Newmanistan

13-07-2008, 09:00

Qazox, can I have an "extension" on that deadline another 24 hours?

The Cup of Harmony Group stage will conclude on the AM of the 14th, and if you've followed some of my role-plays there, alot, roster wise, is depending on whether or not Newmanistan makes the knockout stage, which is up in the air right now, but will be known after that matchday.

With this not starting until the 15th, I can't say why this would be a problem. If my MD1 opponent here didn't like it well... he can remember who's scorinating his potential knockout games. ;)

Qazox

13-07-2008, 16:49

Qazox

13-07-2008, 16:58

Qazox' OXEN CUP Roster:

GK- Henrietta Falo
DEF- Lance Alread
DEF- Brianne Schultz
DEF- Yolanda Young
MID- Zachary Xen
MID- Erica von Stuben (no relation to Dancougar's Professor von Stuben ;))
MID- David Stull
MID- Pauline DelAmico
MID- Kevin Stout
FOR- Gia Hernandez
FOR- Jasyon Malachi

sub- Jared Hilsen
sub- Natalie Carver
sub- Nathaniel Deer Walker

Dancougar

13-07-2008, 17:09

MID- Erica von Stuben (no relation to Dancougar's Professor von Stuben ;))

Heh, it's even better than that, Erica's the name of the princess, as well ^_^

Land de Wood

14-07-2008, 00:22

Well preparations for the Oxen Cup are well underway, the 22 man squad has arrived in Las Vitas ready for their first ever international tournament.

Meanwhile we have just received news that the Baptism of Fire competition is to start about half way through the Oxen Cup meaning unless Land de Wood go out early on, then Andrew Wood will have to send a B-squad to the Baptism of Fire. He may be tempted to send his U-21's to the Baptism of Fire but then may get caught out again by the U-21 World Cup. However, this will at least mean that lots of our players get international experience before the World Cup qualifiers, and may allow Andrew Wood to unearth a hidden gem at the Baptism of Fire.

Theoretically Andrew Wood could pull his team out of the Oxen Cup or ask for permission to call up more players so he can send his best team to the Baptism of Fire, but that is unlikely to go down well with the Oxen Cup organisers. We at Land de Wood News would remind our national team manager and prime minister, Andrew Wood that upsetting tournament organisers is never a good idea and that he would be better to send a weakened team to the Baptism of Fire where the competition should be easier than here at the Oxen Cup. But of course the final decision is his.

Starblaydia

14-07-2008, 00:46

Qazox, can I have an "extension" on that deadline another 24 hours?

OOC: Only if I can have it too, hehe, came back from a wedding over the weekend to find two championships to RP about, as well as starting the Di Bradini Cup and picking a roster for this, I'll have it for you tomorrow, with a neat smattering of World and Regional champions.

Qazox

14-07-2008, 03:19

OOC: Only if I can have it too, hehe, came back from a wedding over the weekend to find two championships to RP about, as well as starting the Di Bradini Cup and picking a roster for this, I'll have it for you tomorrow, with a neat smattering of World and Regional champions.

Just as long as it is up before it starts. (that goes for all of ya.. ok, to be fair)

Milchama

14-07-2008, 04:50

Alexandria Times-Tribune-Star-News-Today-Post-Gazette-Chronicle-Journal-Enquirer

Sports Section

Milchama unveil another weird roster

The story of the demise of Milchamian football took another step today. For those who aren't familiar with the story let us begin at the beginning (a very good place to start): First due to a series of errors that the MFA did not admit to the Milchama World Cup roster was littered with craziness, most notably a banana in net and pictures of 3 famous superstars as strikers. This led to the Knesset deciding to take roster naming responsibilities from the MFA to not be incompetent. Unfortunately the Knesset, in a rare bout of governmental competence, decided that the government probably shouldn't be involved in picking football teams so accidentally picked the Great Alexandria squad from about 100 years ago to represent Milchama in the AOCAF tournament. This was, of course, a squad of all dead men so we had a bunch of corpses represent us in AOCAF. Now the government is at it again as one man petitioned the government to have himself become the Milchama national team. His plea was unfortunately successful so we present the Milchama Oxen Cup Roster:

The traditional 3-3-4 formation and +3 or if the style modifier is below that the highest one available.

GK: Bugsy Borker
D: Bugsy Borker
D: Bugsy Borker
D: Bugsy Borker
M: Bugsy Borker
M: Bugsy Borker
M: Bugsy Borker
F: Bugsy Borker
F: Bugsy Borker
F: Bugsy Borker
F: Bugsy Borker

Subs:
Bugsy Borker
Bugsy Borker
Bugsy Borker
Bugsy Borker
Bugsy Borker

For all those who might be confused Bugsy Borker is in fact one person and he will be representing Milchama in the Oxen Cup. Goddamnit we need a competent FA again!

New Zomboria

14-07-2008, 05:07

Fighting nutrias are setfor their international debut.

Official roster for the Football Association of New Zomboria

Starters:
1- Smoko GK (47 years old)
3- Edgar Agner DEF (28)
5- Alejandro DEF (30)
6- Carles Grana DEF (21)
4- Armando Rosso DEF (27)
19- Cleveland Brown MID (42)
8- Hector Izarra MID (37)
9- Cosmo Zaulyman MID (26)
7- Lukas Blau MID (24)
10- Alejandro2 FOR (24)
13- Xavier Platz FOR (26)

Subs:

21- Choko GK (45)
2- Gianluca Neri DEF (35)
15- Astrud Tressantos DEF (32)
14- Karl-Heinz Sanchez DEF (27)
22- Jorge Che Rolet DEF (24)
18- Alejandro3 MID (20)
17- Rafael Yusadown MID (18)
16- Toto Giallo MID (35)
20- Leroy Lee Otis MID (48)
11- Hasil 'the Haze' Adkins FOR (39)
12- Jimmy Swordfishtrombones FOR (18)

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod scoring events Y
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out red cards to my players Y
Godmod other events Y

Starblaydia

14-07-2008, 07:37

Paul Noble, the 82 year-old president of the Starblaydi Football Association, turned up to the OXEN Cup headquarters barely seconds before the closing of the deadline. With a scrunched up piece of paper in his hand, he walked as fast as his old legs could carry him to the front door and barged his way past all and sundry to get to where he needed to be. He slammed the piece of paper down on a desk and said, through rapid deep breaths,

"The Starblaydi Football Association presents the Starblaydi starting line-up for the seventh OXEN Cup."

Manager: Panarii
Westwood
C. Di Bradini - V. Matranga - Buckstone - Drakkiborgo
Stafador (C)
England _______ Kuu
Na-Me
F. Bentley - Callind

"What about the rest of it," the Qazoxian official asked, "where's the kits and the layout and the little SFA logo and stuff, like usual?"

"Do you think I had time or the skill to draw all that in the back of the car?" Paul asked, aghast. "They'll put it all up on the usual website later today, anyway."

"Oh," replied the official, giving the World Cup and AOCAF Champions a bit of slack, "okay then. Enjoy the tournament and good luck!"

The Gupta Dynasty

14-07-2008, 10:48

Due to lots of pressure from various groups to play the National Team that contained women in it (as well as lots of pressure from the selectors, since the women's team is actually, you know, better), the following group has been selected (in a blatant copy of the format of the Jeruselem roster [I wonder why the IYFS/A selected the Princesses. Hm.]!).

Yafor 2's Roster

"The Golden Wolves" [yes, no name change]

Formation: 5-3-2
Style: -1 or -1 in reality for WC41

Technical Manager: Iktam Velastros

Coach: Gerod Flamer
* former National Team captain and coach
* Cup of Harmony winning captain
* First Yaforite coach to consistently lead the Golden Wolves to WC qualification

Security Staff: Agent QRT-1093984
* Science project by the University of Chelmar
* A robot

Official IYNS Reporters:
* Rbatrik Kuernos
* Prince Sebard (well, it's not like he has to play or anything!)

GK (F,24) Palia Varaduun - Father owns a farm, as well as two cattle
GK (F,29) Morelia Traad - Daughter of two people who were part of the Yaforite army and killed in Generia. Learned football as a kid and stuck to it the whole way through. (CAPTAIN)

DEF (F,28) - Princess Drabes - Big Prince Sebard fan, even looks like an, uhm female clone of Prince Sebard. Even though she plays a totally different position. Whatever.
DEF (F,23) - Jaadria Tariaa - Works pretty hard in defense. She's not bad, if you enjoy defense. You know, like all reasonable, intelligent people do.
DEF (F,21) - Sebardina Intern - Well behaved, just like the real Prince Sebard. Really attractive to the opposite sex, too.
DEF (F,24) - Jurania Sebard - Prince Sebard's sister. The only Sebard on this team.
DEF (F,27) - Mashria Vantris - Very bratty and irritating. Often told to stop acting like she "was the one in The Taming of the Shrew".
DEF (F,26) - Enelia Vintron - Often called Enalla (the female one of the Twin Gods) for her miraculous efforts to stop goals.
DEF (F, 32) - Lelia Mishal - She enjoys pony rides, long walks on the beach...
DEF (F, 27) - Pacia Telia - Named after a country. No one knows quite why.

MID (F,19) - Bathria Baaldin - Voted most likely to sleep with a whole team of cheerleaders. Yeah, she swings that way. You got a problem with it? She'll hit you, too.
MID (F,16) - Saria Sebard - Prince Sebard's only cousin (poor guy!)
MID (F,22) - Princess Drabes II - At least she plays the same position as Prince Sebard, no? (VICE CAPTAIN)
MID (F,24) - Jaria Heyna - A woman with brains and brawn in the midfield.
MID (F,28) - Demoria Litzon - Earned a free spot on the team because the army "let" her in. Apparently they wanted to get rid of her.
MID (F,26) - Falkia Shorian - Unmarried. Yeah, well, there's a story there, too.

STR (F,27) - Adriana Mutu - I'm not sure how she got onto the team. Or why he's listed as "female, 27". Yeah, well, she's a female Romanian imitation. Go figure.
STR (F,22) - Jaria Soradrin. She invented the sport of competitive badminton-racket-slinging.
STR (F,27) - Daniela Hantuchova - I think she plays tennis.
STR (F,26) - Priyanka Chopra - Bollywood actress. Apparently she's good at this, too.

RP Permissions
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events Y
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players Y
Godmod Other Events Y

and

The cover (and, yes, the women play in the same uniform as the men. Bite me)!
http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c5...enia/YAF40.png

[OOC: Apologies to Jeru for *bascially* copying your roster. I'll change, if you so wish it.]

Newmanistan

14-07-2008, 16:42

With the Rockets reaching the Empress’ ultimatum, most of the Cup of Harmony Roster remains in tact for the Oxen Cup, no need to make the major overhaul that may have happened should they have been unsuccessful in reaching it.

If my opponent RP’s first they may:

Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes, but just to the extent of saying so and so was injured. I’ll determine the severity.
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes, but no more then 1 per game.
Godmod other events: TG your idea for approval first. No deaths/stadium damage.

Formation: The Rockets generally play a 4-3-3 formation.
Style Mod: +1

Caps & Goals updated prior to WC41 qualifying.

Manager: Eric Andrews
Age: 47
Club Team: Loudon Leopards
Background: As in Oxen Cup 6, Brian Carson will be out in Starblaydia for the Di Bradini Cup, so Andrews will get another chance to win one more game in this Oxen Cup then he did in the previous one. No more should be read into this selection. Carson saved his job in the Cup of Harmony.

Assistant: James Martin
Age: 50
Club Team: Centralia Cougars
Background: Martin gets his first international experience in this Cup. He is a complete defensive mastermind that turns average defenders into stars and star defenders into legends. His club team allowed just 29 goals in 46 games last season.

And now, your starting eleven:
**** GOALKEEPER ****
Name: Corey Hennis -- Caps: 15
Position: GK
Age: 24
Number: 81 (superstition)
Club Team: Springfield Thoroughbreds
Background: This had to be the most difficult decision for Carson in deciding between World Cup 40 goalkeeper Kevin Dalton, who also plays for him in Pocono City, and Corey Hennis. But at 38, there is some concern that Dalton is becoming vulnerable to top corner shots, and Hennis has been groomed for years. Corey was the starting goalkeeper on each of the Di Bradini teams, so he has no shortage of experience. This will be, however, his first World Cup.

*** DEFENDERS ***

Name: Jeremy Brooker -- Caps: 49 Goals: 1
Position: LB
Number: 5
Age: 25
Club Team: Dunboor FC (Cafundeu)
Background: Brooker’s rise to becoming one of the world’s most promising defenders came to fruition when he was signed by one of the world’s top club teams in Dunboor FC in Cafundeu. Though still young, Jeremy has racked up a lot of interregional experience, and was part of the last World Cup team. He’s only getting better with age. Brooker has outstanding defensive awareness, and is not afraid to get physical with the attackers. He also has tremendous leadership abilities.

Name: Tony Borsinger -- Caps: 38 Goals: 0
Position: LCB
Age: 25
Number: 6
Club Team: Tundra Falls Mariners
Background: Borsinger is the definition of a defensive defender. He never gets caught up in the attack, and is admired for his ability to read plays before they happen at such a young age. Despite an impressive physical stature though, critics feel that Tony is a little too soft at times. He rarely gets carded, though lately has worked on changing that “soft” image of his. He is also the teams spiritual leader, and leads the team in prayer before every game.

Name: Steve Secrist -- Caps: 15 Goals: 0
Position: RCB
Age: 24
Number: 2
Club Team: Free Agent
Background: Secrist has always been compared to Jeremy Brooker as young talented defenders making their way up the ranks, so it’s probably no coincidence that Secrist has also found his home on an overseas team, a contract the recently expired.. He’s not quite as physical as Brooker, just your prototypical young defender who’s solid in his own end. He will join the rush, at times.

Name: Michael Harrison -- Caps: 9 Goals: 0
Position: CB
Age: 23
Number: 8
Club Team: Pocono City Capitals
Background: Harrison was acquired by the Capitals from Springfield in the same deal that sent Corey Hennis to Springfield, and now has the chance to play for his hometown. He doesn’t have a very intimidating physical stature, but that is very misleading, because he is a very aggressive player, and not afraid to mix things up. Though he’s been on the Di Bradini teams, he hasn’t been at this level yet, and this is his first chance to start internationally. But his fast ascension has placed him above other Newmanistan defenders such as Shawn Morton or Brent Treichler.

*** MIDFIELDERS ***
Name: Alex Parnett -- Caps: 8 Goals: 4
Position: LM
Age: 22
Number: 10
Club Team: Free Agent
Background: Ever since he was 11 years old, Parnett has been hailed as the next big thing in Newmanistan. He has amazing ball control skills, an excellent shot, size, and is also strong defensively. So when he got away at 17 to Nethertopia, it was what really made the NSL decide to change up some rules, and make the conversion to the NPL. Keep an eye on this kid, as he is living up to that potential. He should be a great one, and should want to make the most of this opportunity to represent his home country.

Name: Kevin Carrigan -- Caps: 42 Goals: 7
Position: CM
Number: 19
Age: 36
Club Team: Loudon Leopards
Background: Carrigan is a soft-spoken player who is just entirely devoted to football, and desparately wanting to win a championship. Kevin is defensively responsible, but is always eager to be right up there with the strikers. His powerful right leg makes him a welcome addition to any rush. He is a two-time NSL MVP, and a four-time NSL Midfielder of the Year. Carrigan is the Rockets man to deliver corner kicks, and has been doing a great job at this in all the interregional competitions he has been in. Age isn’t a factor, really, because Carrigan never has been a speed burner.

Name: Brett Prescott -- Caps: 42 Goals: 6
Position: RM
Number: 17
Age: 31
Club Team: A.F.F. (Cafundeu)
Background: A fantastic finisher, many people think that he should really be a striker because of it. But it’s because there is a lot more to him then that, as he has a great ability to control the midfield. He does have a bit of a mean streak in him, and that is of some concern to the coaching staff, but they also feel that the club should have at least one player on the pitch like that, so the opponents don’t try to take advantage of the others. He is often assigned to the opponent’s top goal scorer to “rough him up” a little bit. Everyday starter in BoF 27, WC40, and Oxen Cup 6. The list of nations that don’t “like” him is growing and growing!

*** STRIKERS ***
Name: Jeremy McAllister -- Caps: 49 Goals: 52
Position: LS
Number: 20
Age: 25
Club Team: Putnam Lake Eagles
Background: McAllister has made a quick splash in not just Putnam Lake, but the entire NSL as well. His best attribute is his speed, his 4.18 40-yard dash time was second in the NSL skills competition earlier this year, second only to Shawn Drummond. Jeremy then made an equally impressive splash in the Di Bradini Cup, scoring 12 goals, including four games where he scored at least two goals. He was the leading scorer in the tournament, and as it went on, he showed great chemistry with coach Carson. He then scored 17 goals in the Baptism of Fire, including two in the Final. Named to the BoF XI. His resume just keeping getting larger. He has become the best player in the Empire, and perhaps becoming the face of the nation, interregionally. He’s not the captain here, but he was the captain most recently in the 5th Di Bradini Cup.

Name: Kevin Lewis -- (***TEAM CAPTAIN***) Caps: 42 Goals: 20
Position: ST
Number: 43 (superstition; has worn it in everything his whole life)
Age: 34
Club Team: Pocono City Capitals
Background: Lewis has made the number 43 famous in Newmanistan. His superstition over the number was certainly helped that he scored 43 goals in his rookie season. Nevermind the unusual number, Lewis is a deadly striker, with good finishing ability. Though he really fits well in a 4-3-3 formation is he is creative passer, particularly in close. He has, on four occasions led the NSL in assists, and on three occasions led it in goals. Lewis was also the captain for World Cup 40, and for Oxen Cup 6. He is very superstitious, his role in the infamous penguin sacrifice mishap in the Oxen Cup wasn’t by accident.

Name: Shawn Drummond -- Caps: 44 Goals: 13
Position: ST
Age: 25
Number: 11
Club Team: Atletico Jutense (Cafundeu)
Background: McAllister and Drummond working together is a thing of beauty for the Newmanistanian. Their blinding speed (sub 4.20 40-yard times) and ball handling skills are very exciting to watch, as long as your rooting for them and not the opponent. He can be somewhat streaky. Recently signed a big contract overseas to help out Atletico Jutense of Cafundeu.

*** SUBSTITUTES ***

Name: Chris Kusler
Position: GK
Number: 1
Age: 24
Club Team: Putnam Lake EaglesBackground: Kusler was a reserve keeper on the Di Bradini 4 roster, but got lost in the shuffle a bit after that. Comign off a big year in Putnam Lake, and with the endorsement of Jeremy McAllister, Kusler once again returns to the international stage.

Name: Mark McCafferty -- Caps: 42 Goals: 1
Position: RCB
Number: 4
Age: 35
Club Team: Centralia Cougars
Background: McCafferty was originally a teammate of Chapman’s when they broke into the league together and early in their careers before the business aspect of the NSL separated them. McCafferty is now part of the Cougars, who are a very defensive minded club, rated the “#1 most boring team in the NSL” by fans of the league. To the Cougars and McCafferty, that is a major compliment. He is 2 time winner of the Defender of the Year award. Mark is an aggressive one, and is one of the top candidates on the squad to lead the club in bookings. He started every game throughout BoF 27, WC40, and Oxen Cup 6. Age is catching up to him a bit now, though.

Name: Eddie Chapman -- Caps: 42 Goals: 1
Position: RB
Number: 7
Age: 35
Club Team: Loudon Leopards
Background: Chapman has been the anchor of the Leopards defense for over a decade. He is a very consistent defender. He’s not the type to wow you, but he is reliable and safe in his own end. He’s not afraid to make a run upfield, but only when he’s sure he’ll have support. Also started every game throughout the BoF 27, WC40, and Oxen Cup 6. Like McCafferty, his age makes him better used as late game sub. But to have this kind of sub ready to come on is certainly an advantage.

Name: Chris Peterson -- Caps: 42 Goals: 2
Position: MID
Number: 13
Age: 30
Club Team: Clube Imperial (Cafundeu)
Background: Peterson isn’t going to score many goals, but what he is going to do is create opportunities. He is a speedy midfielder, and it allows him to also be just as effective in the defensive end. He has twice received recognition as the NSL’s Best Two-Way Midfielder, something that excites his new team from Cafundeu. Everyday starter in WC40. Placing him as a substitute was probably’s Carson’s second toughest decision, but Parnett has just blossomed so much, that he earned that role, rather then Chris losing it.

Name: Julie McElroy -- Caps: 16 Goals: 4
Position: LS
Age: 29
Number: 12
Club Team: Southport Tigers
Background: Julie is the best female player in the Empire, and she proved that with a strong showing in Oxen Cup 6. She is fearless, as not only will she take anyone on, she is also eager to initiate a lot of the physical play. Had 5 caps in the Baptism of Fire, and three more in World Cup qualifying. A versatile player, she is capable of playing a midfield role should Carson wish to change the formation up.

**** RESERVES ****

Name: Nate Stratton -- Caps: 34 Goals: 0
Position: CB
Number: 3
Age: 33
Club Team: Springfield Thoroughbreds
Background: Stratton is a tall defender with an outstanding work ethic, and plays great under adversity. He will use his size to his advantage. Stratton started in BoF 27 and Oxen Cup 6, and the fact that he is now a reserve says more for the Empire’s depth at the position then any individual “drop off”.

Name: Shane Classen -- Caps: 3 Goals: 0
Position: MID
Age: 33
Number: 14
Club Team: South Charlotte Condors
Background: Frustrated a little bit in having to play for a such a poor team with the Condors, Classen is absolutely thrilled to be recognized for the national team, and is more then happy to simply be a reserve. Classen is a defensive midfielder, but with a powerful leg kick, he can get the ball to the strikers deceptively well. Very physical player. Was also a reserve in WC40.

Name: Steve Boland -- Caps: 6 Goals: 0
Position: MID
Number: 16
Age: 30
Club Team: Springfield Thoroughbreds
Background: In his second year in the league, Boland won the NSL MVP. Since then, he has continued to play at a high-level. Boland has a tremendous work ethic, and would be captain material if he were a starter. He is able to score goals, but he is more of a set up man. He will likely be the first choice to be promoted from reserve to substitute should need be. He was a sub in WC40.

Name: John Murphy (I have to refigure his caps/goals)
Position: ST
Age: 33
Number: 15
Club Team: Loudon Leopards
Background: Murphy was a peculiar omission for the World Cup 41 teams, especially after having what appeared to be a solid effort in the World Cup 40 tournaments. He did have some injuries that may have turned Brian Carson off, but this is Eric Andrews’ team, and he’ll find a spot for Murphy.

Land de Wood

15-07-2008, 00:05

Yesterday we revealed the team, today we reveal the kit they will be wearing:

Home kit:
http://www.ajwood.me.uk/land_de_Wood/home_kit.jpg

Away kit:
http://www.ajwood.me.uk/land_de_Wood/away_kit.jpg

Goalies kit:
http://www.ajwood.me.uk/land_de_Wood/goalies_kit.jpg

Qazox

15-07-2008, 04:22

RP CUTOFF TIME :salute:

Scores will posted by 1:00am EDT.

(ooc: I like the new smilies :))

Qazox

15-07-2008, 05:35

MATCHDAY ONE SCORES aka 4 goal day

(winners in BOLD, Draws in Italics)

GROUP A @ Henrí Savagé Stadium, New Recife, Capacity: 73,000
West Zirconia 1-3 Qazox
The Blouman Empire 0-2 Newmanistan
Sorthern Northland 4-1 Arrundeu

GROUP B @ Estadio Azul Flores, Iguana de Mia, Capacity: 71,000
Jeruselem 4-1 Solenial
Kose and the Turkomans 3-1 Devildogma
Green wombat 1-4 Starblaydia

GROUP C @ Toro Rojo Stadium, Las Vitas, Capacity: 70,000
Land de Wood 0-4 Milchama
Acapais 3-4 Prux
Dancougar 2-0 kenavt

GROUP D @ Vogg War Memorial Stadium, Vogg City, Capacity: 69,594
Cafundeu 3-0 Lovisa
Retired Tourists 2-2 New Zomboria
Yafor 2 4-2 Nire and Nire

Standings will be up after MD2

Newmanistan

15-07-2008, 10:25

THE ROCKET REPORT

DRUMMOND PAIR DOWNS BLOUMANS

Qazox- Well, we think they’re the Blouman Empire, anyway. We have not received official confirmation as to whether they are a true national team, or represent the return of the Corrimal Rangers. They got a little upset four years ago when we referred to them incorrectly, so hopefully we got it right. It was the first game of the 7th edition of the Oxen Cup from Qazox, and the Rockets wanted to get off on the right track, to show that they will once again be a contender. In beating a quality opponent here tonight, the Rockets did just that.

Leading the way, like he did in the 6th Oxen Cup, was Eric Andrews, given the opportunity to coach the team while Brian Carson focuses on the junior team in Starblaydia, as the Di Bradini Cup opens up later on in the week. Andrews insists that he is not disappointed in Brian Carson’s reaching the ultimatum to remain on as the main coach of the national team, and in a recent interview, commented, “I absolutely put the nation ahead of anything to do with myself. I am elated with the fact that the Rockets did what they did in the Cup of Harmony. We have a rivalry at the club level, but at the international level, we both want the best for Newmanistan.” Several key players on the Oxen Cup team are playing under Andrews for the first time as they were on the Di Bradini side of things four years ago, two players of such are Jeremy McAllister and Shawn Drummond, each critical players in the Cup of Harmony. When asked about playing for Andrews for the first time, especially admist the pressure of the Empress’ ultimatum which has since passed, J-Mac responded, “Coach Andrews has done a good job with Loudon, and he did a good job with this team before, so it will a new experience playing for him, and with his guidance perhaps I can grow more as a player.”

As far as the game went, Brett Prescott immediately reminded the Bloumans that he was still part of the Newmanistanian team and did what he does best, rattling several key players of the opponent. Bloumany had the best chances early in the contest, but Corey Hennis stood tall, turning aside the shots that reached the net. After about 15 minutes, the Rockets defenders asserted themselves better, and the Blouman Empire was not able to create any more real solid opportunities for the rest of the first half. The pendulum of momentum was shifting towards the Rockets, but they were seeing the same success that the Bloumans found earlier. Nothing. Bloumany’s goalkeeper also had a terrific first half, and we went to intermission with the scoreboard reading a pair of zeroes. In the 61st minute, after back and forth play, the Rockets found the breakthrough, and it was by Shawn Drummond, a player the Blouman fans in attendance still had their colorful chant for. They could chant it all they wanted, because when he fired a header off a great cross from Alex Parnett to beat the goalkeeper, it was Drummond getting the last laugh, putting Newmanistan in front. No less then three minutes later, the Rockets came charging up the field again, and once again with Parnett being the instigator, setting the play up down low. His cross was intended for McAllister, but after it was deflected a few times off J-Mac and a couple of Blouman defenders, Drummond was in prime position again, and he made the most of his opportunity. Firing home a second goal just like that. Two-nil in favor of the Rockets. The Bloumans got a little agitated by the quick nature of the goals, but they showed some character and effort, pushing to make a comeback. Their best chance came in the 82nd when a shot bounced off the post and out. The win, goes to the Rockets, and they start out in great form. Their next game will be against Sorthern Northland. Gee, where did we hear that before?

Land de Wood

15-07-2008, 10:55

Well the first game for the national side was never going to be easy, especially when our brave players were drawn against defending champions Milchama. In some ways it would be a victory in itself if they kept the score respectable, and well if they managed a goal themselves that would be good.
So the game kicked off with Land de Wood looking a bit nervous as they faced one player who quite literally was playing everywhere, Bugsy Borker.
This seemed to confuse our inexperienced team and the game was only a few minutes old when a mistake by David Aimer, led to the first goal.
From the kick off the ball went out to right winger Aaran Whitemore who made a darting run down the right hand side, and got a good cross in for Gary Hoggins who headed narrowly wide, what was to be Land de Wood's best chance of the game.
Bugsy Borker ran rings against them and in the 20th minute got his team's second goal.
Land de Wood managed to settle things down as time went on only for Gary Lewis to give away a free kick on the edge of the area in the 41st minute and Bugsy Borker to score the resulting free kick.
A few minutes time it was half time and this gave Andrew Wood the opportunity to calm his players down and prepare them for the 2nd half.
Land de Wood started bravely almost scoring through Steve Eclair, but alas it was not to be.
Bugsy Borker continued to caused them trouble and soon made it 4-0.
Fearing the worst, Andrew Wood switched to a 4-5-1 formation, taking off Steve Eclair and bringing on Stephen Diddon to sit alongside Richard Butty in front of the back four.
Stephen Diddon made some good challenges and managed to stem the flow against them.
In an effort to try and get at least a goal from this game Larry Derby was taken off for Ray Horse who played in the hole behind Gary Hoggins but failed to make much impact.
And so the game ended 4-0. Well it wasn't a double figures defeat as no doubt some feared it might be and while it would have been nice to get a goal, we can't feel to bad about losing 4-0 to the reigning champions.

Newmanistan

15-07-2008, 13:13

(Coach Andrews gathers the team together in the morning following the Blouman Empire victory)

Andrews: Good morning guys, I figure we’ll do more video training then physical, to see the Northerners in action, and scout them pretty well, then tomorrow have a lengthy session. Here’s game tape for all of you focusing on the Northerner most likely to be your man during the contest. (Passes tapes out)

Brooker: It’s mostly the same roster as their Cup of Harmony team, right?

Andrews: Here’s their roster (passes it out)

Drummond: Ahhh...

Brooker: There’s the answer right there.

McAllister: I like that we’re getting a history with Sorthern Northland again, they were a fun team to play back in the Di Bradini Cup that we won.

Lewis: When we played them in the Cup of Harmony, that was some contest.

McAllister: Did they make through customs?

Andrews: As far as I know, they aren’t stuck at the airport this time.

Brooker: That was crazy too.

Parnett: Hey you guys here about that Qazoxian Sports Festival going on? I hear there’s some hot beach volleyball action going on. We should go check out the hot chicks. Who plays for us?

Brooker: Do their names really matter?

McAllister: Yes they do.

Drummond: Yes, to Jeremy they do.

McAllister: Need I remind you that one of those hot chicks happens to be my little sister?

Parnett: Is she taken? Can you hook me up? (Drummond thwaps Parnett)

Andrews: Ok everyone, remember, I gave you game tapes of Sorthern Northland players for you to be studying, not women playing beach volleyball.

Lewis: Yes, Coach is right. We are here to play football, and we know that Sorthern Northland will be a grueling game for us based on what happened in the Cup of Harmony.

McElroy: Hey, Alex, there’s men’s beach volleyball too right?

Parnett: Yes, Julie, but we don’t have any representatives in that.

McElroy: That’s fine. We should all take a nice, team building field trip to watch some beach volleyball. Just for a couple hours, and in the meantime we watch tapes. Then tomorrow, coach can add another hour to his grueling training session. Everyone wins, right coach?

Andrews: I can’t see the harm. But before we go and as soon as we get back, we’re watching the game tape, got it?

Team: Yes coach.

(Team disperses, Parnett and Drummond wait behind)

Parnett: 200 gold coins if one us can bed Jeremy’s sister.

Drummond: You’re on!

Dancougar

15-07-2008, 15:43

KENNETH: If it's Qazox, it's the Oxen Cup. A tournament for teams to experiment, have fun, but always go for the win... the Wings look to avenge their semifinal loss at the previous tournament, but have a lot of work to do just to make the second round. Kenneth Prime here on Sportscenter, along with Scotty Furr.

SCOTTY: Four groups of six, top two advance, and the Wings will try to do it with the college all-stars. There's not much time for the guys to raise their stock for the upcoming D-League Super Draft, but make no mistake, that's definitely a concern for players who've declared. But business comes first. Just like last time, Acapais will be the last game. Before that, the defending champions Milchama, who are bringing a one-man wrecking crew. For reals. Before that, a crack at Prux, who have ditched the Roboducks for a team of historical figures from Earth Prime... dreamed realm, eat your heart out. Before that, which is actually next up, talented newcomers Land de Wood, who are soaking up the experience before the World Cup 42 cycle.

KENNETH: And before all that, highlights of last night's opener with kenavt. Fans may or may not remember them from the IBC, but then again, fans may or may not remember our own basketball Black Wings showing up for that one. It's the first meeting, though, for the footballing sides, and it happens in Las Vitas. The Wings are not exactly known to be fast starters, but they took advantage of an early mistake and rode the momentum from there. Tenth minute, Kawaguchi plays in an awkward cross, 'keeper comes off his line... and he misplays the ball! Culverhouse has an open net finish and just like that, it's 1-0 to the Wings. Not strong enough in the air, the 'keeper, and he knows that one's his fault. The Wings almost manufacture goal number two a few minutes later, as Saito takes a crack at goal, but it catches a deflection out of harm's way. Minute twenty nine, Wings get another chance, but Brittain's header is coolly snagged out of midair.

SCOTTY: Kenavt settled down towards the end of the first half and come close to the equilizer, as Ieyasu yields the corner kick. Curled in, and Vaccarino... point blank save on the header!! Kenavt can't believe it's not 1-1, and if you look at it again, Vaccarino was actually moving in the opposite direction, and the ball just managed to clip him on the way in. He had two saves in the first half. We go to the second half, and it's another break for the Wings... through ball, Fey is beaten, but the flag is up! Call could go either way, you be the judge of this one.

KENNETH: A step, maybe.

SCOTTY: A fairy's, so says the kenavt manager, as the Wings hold onto that lead.

KENNETH: Breathing space in minute sixty three; after a buildup in the midfield, Saito gets the ball wide and tries to cut it back. Turns to the top of the box, he's covered. Lays it off for Voronzoff, who squares to Kawaguchi. And how's this for some footwork? One man, two men beat... Kawaguchi fires it home, just past the outstretched arms of the goalie, and it's 2-0. The towels are out, and the team is cruising. Saito gets another shot a few minutes later. Keeper dives late, but breathes a sigh of relief as it bends wide for a goal kick.

SCOTTY: Voronzoff tests kenavt in minute seventy nine with this effort, a low shot to the near post, but not a lot on it... easily gobbled up. Other end of the field, kenavt try to pull one back, and make it a mad dash to the final whistle... no. The shot is deflected at the top of the box by Fey, and the second effort flies yards over the bar... it's the right start for the Wings. They win it 2-0. Afterward, fanservice for the ladies.

CULVERHOUSE (locker room interview clip): Football is weird like that, sometimes luck is better than skill. I was just in the right place at the right time, and I, uh, took advantage of that.

VACCARINO (locker room interview clip): I mean, it's a first international for all of us, so we wanted to get settled as soon as we could. We got that early break, Culvy got that rebound, so we were able to get that first goal out of the way and just play our game.

DUPONT (press conference clip): They showed what they're capable of doing, they didn't let themselves get stuck on the ropes, and now they know what it's like to win at this stage. But certainly there's plenty of things I thought we could do better; some of that, I told them at halftime, and they'll get the rest at practice tomorrow.

SCOTTY: Land de Wood is next, as we mentioned, and there's no reason to believe that they'll just roll over, despite getting shut down by Team Bugsy to the tune of 4-0. As Hal Sanantonio reports, these guys know what they're doing.

HAL: When Prime Minister Andrew Wood placed himself on the pre-tournament roster in the run-up to Oxen Cup 7, no one was that surprised. Several world leaders have played for their nation in the past, providing the kind of spark that few team captains can hope to match. But when the final roster came out, people took notice - Wood was going to remain on the sidelines. A move that not only shows the trust he has in his players, but also reveals his understanding of the game and how to best show off the developing strength of his nation. The eleven men he's named as starters are top players in the Land de Wood league, also new to the world but nevertheless boasting veterans who presumably played at other levels. They're proud to be here, regardless of the result... something that Charles DuPont says makes them a dangerous opponent. Reporting from Las Vitas, Hal Sanantonio, DSPN.

Land de Wood

15-07-2008, 16:39

We would like to take this opportunity to confirm the experience that some of our players had, and perhaps give a little insight into the background of our new national team.
As some of you are aware our fair nation, was formed only recently, following sterling work by our Prime Minister, Andrew Wood, and his company Wood Limited. Our nation was then set up and the population comprised of the majority of the work force and extended families.
Many of the population enjoy a good game of football and some played at professional level in the countries that they originated from before coming to our new nation, land de Wood. It is from these that our national team is formed.
As has been recognised by the media in Dancougar, our players are proud to represent their nation and we do boast some talented players.
Yes in experience let us down in our first game and perhaps if Andrew Wood had been more defensive the scoreline would not have been high, but then again it has been proved in the past that sometimes you have to go at the bigger teams to have any hope against them.
Andrew Wood is expected to unveil his team tonight at around 00:00 BST (19:00 EDT). Will he keep the same lineup, or make any alterations? Will he keep with the attackive mind set against last time semi-finalists Dancougar.

West Zirconia

15-07-2008, 22:26

The opening game of the Oxen Cup saw hosts Qazox play international débutants West Zirconia at the Henri Savagé Stadium. This was a match that promised so much. The hosts had been preparing this competition for months, while the visitors were preparing to step up onto the international stage.

The match started with both teams playing exciting football, with the skills of Qazox winger Zachary Xen and his West Zirconian counterpart Anthony McGowan proving to be one of the great contests of the game. The naiveté of the visitors was soon exposed, with a serious defensive error by Glenn Charlton in the 17th minute setting Gia Hernandez up for an almost certain goal which was inexplicably deflected by Steve Gray.

The deadlock was finally broken on the half-hour, when Kevin Stout sailed through the West Zirconian defence, before scoring in the top-left corner, giving the Banks goalkeeper no chance. To their credit, the visitors showed no signs of discouragement, and almost equalised two minutes before the break when a Matthew Love shot went inches wide of the post.

Qazox wasted no time in the second half, and it was only three minutes before Stout scored his - and Qazox's - second with a stunning shot from twenty yards. The misery continued for West Zirconia, as in the 55th minute Qazox's third goal arrived, a Jayson Malachi penalty after he had been brought down by opposing captain Ben Phillips.

At this point Qazox seemed to become a little too careless, and on 63 minutes defender Brianne Schultz was sent off for a ridiculously clumsy challenge on Steve Griffiths just outside the penalty area. Ed French scored with the resulting free-kick, which took the score to 3-1.

West Zirconia sensed that they could still come back into this, and coach Roy Hazell's decision to bring on striker Jerome Bennett for Glenn Charlton announced that, as far as they were concerned, this contest wasn't over. A couple of minutes later, Qazox made their intentions clear when forward Gia Hernandez went off, to be replaced by Jared Hilsen. This only served to frustrate the visitors, culminating in the booking of Gareth Doyle after a series of fouls. He was quickly replaced, by Banks' Lee Pritchard, but even this couldn't help West Zirconia break down the stubborn Qazox defence, even with the one-man advantage.

A penalty in the 85th minute, awarded after Steve Griffiths had been tripped by Jared Hilsen, gave the visitors hope. However, Ed French shot it straight into the grateful arms of Henrietta Falo, and that hope faded.

West Zirconia battled to the end, but the romantic start to their international career was simply not to be. Don't write them off just yet, though - this team will only improve with experience.

Qazox__________3-1__________West Zirconia
Stout 30,48__________________French 63
Malachi (pen) 55

Booked: Doyle (West Zirconia) 78
Sent off: Schultz (Qazox) 63

Match attendance: 71,730

Milchama

15-07-2008, 22:54

"Ok I have a question"

"What?"

"How do we keep winning?"

"It's a great question that cannot be answered simply. Apparently this Borker fellow is really fast"

"I would say he scored 4 goals and didn't concede anything"

"We even managed to make 3 subs and I have no idea how that could take place with one person"

"One of the many questions of this tournament. Look last time we didn't even RP this thing and won it and now we won 4-0 with a one person squad. This is a great tournament for us."

"I guess. Still it worries me that we fielded a one person squad in the first place"

"Whatever man a win is a win"

"How did we win this game anything"

"Because Bugsy Borker is superhuman, he ran rings around all 11 people in Land de Wood. He even headed in his own crosses"

"Is this more witch doctor stuff?"

"No he's just Bugs Bunny in disguise"

"Oh... ok"

"Yeh this is going to be weird"

"Yep, but is it any weirder than a banana in goal or a team full of dead men"

"Not really but it would be nice to have a regular lineup for once"

"We keep winning though"

"No we lost in octos of the World Cup that is unacceptable"

"But we got to semis of AOCAF and we are winning with this one man team"

"Oy!"

"This is still slightly more sane then Margaret"

"I guess but I still think we should hold out hope that the MFA can get its act back together so that we don't have another weird squad for the World Cup qualifiers"

"Yes"

Green wombat

15-07-2008, 23:40

Talk about a rough beginning, the newly crowned World Cup Champions, Starblaydia, in its first tourney since taking back the title, faced.... the still re-building Green wombat. Predictably, the World Cup Champs decimated the Wombats 4-1, with the lone goal coming off the foot of Norris Menotti in the 37th minute.

Starblaydia, lead 3-0 by that point on two goals by Callind in the 14th and 25th minutes and a goal by Na-Me in the 20th. They finished off the scoring in the 62nd with a goal from F. Bentley.

Up next for the Wombats is newcomers Devildogma, 3-1 losers to Kose and the Turkomans.

Land de Wood

16-07-2008, 00:30

We are delighted to bring you an exclusive interview with prime minister and manager Andrew Wood, before our national side's game against Dancougar. Our interview was Larry Frost.

Larry: So Prime Minister, how does it feel to be in the thick of things here in Qazox.
Andrew: Please call me Andrew for the duration of these games. It is great to be here, with fellow national teams. I'm sure it will do wonders for international trade as we put Land de Wood on the map.
Larry: But surely Prime Minister, I mean Andrew, you can't have been happy with that first result.
Andrew: Look Larry we were playing against the champions, yes they may be literally a one man team, but what a player he is. Give the lads time and they will bring forth the goods.
Larry: I hope you are right. so on to Dancougar, another tough game, against last times semi finalists.
Andrew: Indeed I'm not quite sure how we ended up with the teams that finished first and fourth last time out, I guess the seeding of the groups is not just solely based on last time out's results. I'm hopeful that we can surprise them.
Larry: So let's look at the team you've got planned for the game. Is Patrick Clemence going to keep his place?
Andrew: Ok so he let in 4 goals, but he made a number of good saves and I think changing the goalie is a drastic step to make after just one game so he stays.
Larry: Ok, but what about the back four which Bugsy ran rings around?
Andrew: Well I think we lacked some pace in the centre of the park, so I'm dropping Stephen Sterland and bringing in Richard Wilson but the other 3, David Aimer, Gary Lewis and Woodrow Derby keep their place as does Richard Butty who will continue to sit in front of that back four.
Larry: We saw a couple of good runs from Aaran Whitemore so I guess he'll still be there but what about Larry Derby and Stephen Redrow.
Andrew: As you say Aaran played well last game, Larry and Stephen didn't play as well as perhaps they would have liked, but I think they deserve another chance.
Larry: What about up front Gary Hoggins and Steve Eclair didn't exactly have lots of chances?
Andrew: Well no, so it is difficult to judge them for that. Gary Hoggins was unlucky not to score and his height is always an advantage. Steve Eclair, I'm not sure, I think the pace of Ray Horse maybe to our advantage, playing him behind Gary Hoggins could be what we need.
Larry: So you are switching to a 4-1-3-1-1 formation but are we still going to play the attackive play we saw last game?
Andrew: Yes, I believe it's important for us to go at the opposition, we are here to entertain as well as to win, and if we just sit back and defend everyone will be bored.
Larry: Thank you Andrew for that information, Hal from Dancougar's sportscentre had a couple of comments about your decision to include yourself in the pre-tournament squad but not then going on to name yourself in the squad, anything you would like to add?
Andrew: Well I would like to thank Hal for his complement, as he said, while I feel of course, I could have done a job on the park, I have to take a step back and let those with real talent show what they are made of. This squad has played in different lands at different levels before settling here on the land de Wood and yes it may take time for the team to gel together, but I have a feeling that we will become a force to be reckoned with.
Larry: Good as always to speak to you Andrew, good luck for the next game.
Andrew: Thank you, always happy to speak to the press.

So a couple of changes there, formation is 4-1-3-1-1, style: attackive (+1):
Patrick Clemence
David Aimer Gary Lewis Richard Wilson Woodrow Derby
Richard Butty
Aaran Whitemore Larry Derby Stephen Redrow
Ray Horse
Gary Hoggins

Jeruselem

16-07-2008, 01:09

Dazza: So, how was World Youth Day Sister Marsha.
Marsha: Great, it was good to meet the Pope.
Dazza: I've met the Pope already.
Marsha: Say, what's he think of you?

Dazza: I'm a very naughty girl.
Marsha: He thought I was strange but cute all the same.
Dazza: Not many Nuns coach football teams.
Marsha: I got a blessing too, it's all good.

Dazza: Hope it helps with this Oxen 7 cup.
Marsha: Group is a bit religious.
Dazza: We have the Purple Menace ...
Marsha: And some team called Devildogma ...

Dazza: And them annoying Turks from Kose and the Turkomans
Marsha: We'll need divine help against them Star people.
Dazza: Yes, Solenial didn't put up much of a fight really.
Marsha: No, there are much harder teams around.

Dazza: So how you think our keeper Jane is doing as leader?
Marsha: Pretty good. She's learnt a lot of people skills.
Dazza: From who?
Marsha: You

Dazza: People skills are very important indeed.
Marsha: Kate is being ... Kate.
Dazza: You mean calling some of team ... slackass lazy slutface whore bitches.
Marsha: Yes, seems to work though.

Dazza: One needs a bulldog dogmatic to keep the team awake.
Marsha: She could tone down the language a bit.
Dazza: But some of us are slackass lazy slutface whore bitches
Marsha: I know.

Dancougar

16-07-2008, 02:42

"Beach volleyball..." mumbled Jun to no one in particular. "Sure brings back memories."

"Of what?" asked Tetsuya, glaring at her.

Jun giggled. "Oh, right. You had to stay with the robot."

An anime-style nerve twinge appeared on Tetsuya's forehead, but he calmed down and turned away. The two of them were walking down the streets of Las Vitas and had caught some of the Qazoxian Sports Festival on the many storefront screens of an electronics store. "By the way, why are we in Qazox, anyway? We haven't appeared since that anniversary thingy."

"Perhaps this is a prelude of sorts?" asked Jun. "You know, a sort of introduction. A teaser trailer."

"Psh, that's hilarious," said Tetsuya, rolling his eyes. "A teaser for what?"

The Kingdom of Dancougar's Omake Theatre Presents
"Better Know an RP Character"

When Tetsuya isn't looking, Jun ducks into a small booth on the side of the road. It looks like your run-of-the-mill photo booth, except inside there's a camera linked to something called the fourth wall.

"Hi," she smiles, waving. "My name's Jun Aoyama. Nice to meet you!" She sits back and and crosses her legs. She's dressed simply - a pair of jeans with a black tee tucked in. Over that she wears a black jacket with red trim that has her unit insignia and pilot's wings sewn on. "Oh, you noticed this. So, I'm the pilot of the Land Cougar Magnum, one of the four machines that makes up our nation's strongest robot... Dancougar."

She reaches inside her neckline and extracts what, at first, appears to be a necklace. They're actually her dog tags. After showing them to the camera, she hides them again. "I become the right arm when we combine," she continues. "Tetsuya's the head. Of course, right? The two of us are supposedly named after characters from Great Mazinger, whatever that is. It doesn't sound that tough..."

Time to display her vital stats on the screen via the magic of modern video editing! Jun Aoyama, twenty four years old, six feet tall, a hundred and thirty five po... "A~HEM!" Sorry, A hundred and twenty ei... "We can round it there." She smiles. I'm not sure it's a good idea to mess with her. She can be pleasant and cute, but when she's angry, you really notice all of that lean muscle of hers.

She stretches. This cramped little booth is starting to get annoying. We notice that she wears no rings on her fingers. "Well, just ask, if you want to know!" she says. "No, I'm not with anybody right now. Tetsuya? Well, that would be the obvious choice, wouldn't it? No, I like someone else..." She stares off into the distance, any by distance, we mean the wall three inches to her right. "The prince is actually a really down to earth guy... we got to spend some time together at the Starblaydia anniversary party, after all." Rather than blush, her face is furrowed with determined vigor. "If there's anything I ask for in a future storyline, it's that I have a chance to show him what I can really do!"

She exits the booth with a dramatic, fiery background behind her. Tetsuya looks confused, and then enters. He taps the camera lens. Then, bending over, he looks into it directly so all you can see is his eye. Then he sits back. "Hey... uh... I'm Tetsuya Tsumura. Pilot of the Screaming Eagle, head of the combining robot Dancougar! Of the nation, Dancougar! Yeah!" He shakes off the awkward redundancy.

"So... what about me?" he begins. "I've had, what, ten seconds of screen time? Yeah, that was totally awesome. At least I quoted South Burning." He puts his hands behind his head and leans back, nearly kicking the camera. He's dressed in his fatigues and lets his dog tags bounce freely with every move.

Tetsuya Tsumura, vital stats - 6' 4", a hundred and seventy eight pounds, twenty six years old... "Whoa, hold up, you're running my stats already? I've hardly gotten to say anything!" he cries, waving his hands in front of the screen. The vital stats pause in mid-display. "Right... um... so yeah, shoot, what to say... well... right, so Jun. I bet Jun tried to act all cute for you guys." He sports a devilish grin. "Well, for one thing, she really hates it when you tell point out her manly hands..."

"WHAT WAS THAT?!" There's a growl from off screen. An arm shoots into the booth and grabs onto Tetsuya's collar, dragging him outside. Hey, were those really Jun's hands? The short nails, the powerful grip... ah, we'll say no more. Until next time...

Qazox

16-07-2008, 05:51

RP CUTOFF and....

MATCHDAY TWO SCORES aka Draw Day

(winners in BOLD, Draws in Italics)

GROUP A @ Henrí Savagé Stadium, New Recife, Capacity: 73,000
The Blouman Empire 2-3 Qazox
Sorthern Northland 0-1 Newmanistan
West Zirconia 0-0 Arrundeu

GROUP B @ Estadio Azul Flores, Iguana de Mia, Capacity: 71,000
Jeruselem 1-1 Starblaydia
Kose and the Turkomans 2-0 Solenial
Green wombat 3-2 Devildogma

GROUP C @ Toro Rojo Stadium, Las Vitas, Capacity: 70,000
Acapais 1-3 Milchama
Dancougar 2-2 Prux
Land de Wood 1-1 kenavt

GROUP D @ Vogg War Memorial Stadium, Vogg City, Capacity: 69,594
Cafundeu 4-2 Nire and Nire
Retired Tourists 1-2 Lovisa
Yafor 2 5-2 New Zomboria

(Standings will be tommorrow afternoon, sorry all)

Land de Wood

16-07-2008, 12:38

Well confusion surrounded the start of our 2nd match in the Oxen Cup.
Up until kickoff we had been expecting to play Dancougar, but it turned out we were actually playing kenavt.
Our players stood there for the first 10 seconds trying to work out why they were playing a team they weren't expecting to play, meanwhile Kenavt took advantage of the confusion and scored one of the quickest goals ever scored.
Realising that it didn't really matter who they were playing, who ever it was our lads had a job to do, and from the restart started playing some good attackive football, but found Kenavt difficult to break down. Still losing 1-0 at half time, Andrew Wood, had the chance to give our lads a talking to and to send them out in the second half raring to go.
Larry Derby was taken of and on came, young, Richard Higgins, who almost scored a couple minutes into the game when Ray Horse sent him free.
Then in the 60th minute a cross from Aaran Whitemore was knocked down by Gary Hoggins into the path of Richard Higgins who scored a lovely goal. 1-1.
The game continued with both teams battling trying to get a winner, but a draw it was to end.
So our first point on the board from a game that also saw a couple of yellow cards for our team, Richard Butty booked for a bad tackle 30 yards from goal, while Gary Lewis picked up a yellow card after the first goal, when he argued with the referee that the goal shouldn't stand as they weren't expecting the opponents they got.
So our first point, lets see if next time around our boys can get their first win.

Qazox

16-07-2008, 21:04

STANDINGS AFTER MD 2

Group A W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Qazox 2-0-0 6 6 3 +3
Newmanistan 2-0-0 6 3 0 +3
S. Northland 1-0-1 3 4 2 +2
West Zirconia 0-1-1 1 1 3 -2
Arrundeu 0-1-1 1 1 4 -3
Blouman Empire 0-0-2 0 2 5 -3

Group B W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
K. & T. T. 2-0-0 6 5 1 +4
Jeruselem 1-1-0 4 5 2 +3
Starblaydia 1-1-0 4 5 2 +3
Green wombat 1-0-1 3 4 6 -2
Devildogma 0-0-2 0 3 6 -3
Solenial 0-0-2 0 1 6 -5

Group C W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Milchama 2-0-0 6 7 1 +6
Dancougar 1-1-0 4 4 2 +2
Prux 1-1-0 4 6 5 +1
kenavt 0-1-1 1 1 3 -2
Land de Wood 0-1-1 1 1 5 -4
Acapais 0-0-2 0 4 7 -3

Group D W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Yafor 2 2-0-0 6 9 4 +5
Cafundeu 2-0-0 6 7 2 +5
Lovisa 1-0-1 3 2 4 -2
Retired Tourists 0-1-1 1 3 4 -1
New Zomboria 0-1-1 0 4 7 -3
Nire & Nire 0-0-2 0 4 8 -4

Dancougar

16-07-2008, 21:43

KENNETH: After spending most of yesterday preparing for Land de Wood, a claim which we picked up and ran with on our previews here on Sportscenter, there was egg on everybody's face after an intern realized, "Oh, snap, somebody read the schedule wrong!" As it turns out Land de Wood is the THIRD game in the group stage, and the second was against PRUX and the Historical All-Stars. But should it really matter? A team that's ready to play is ready to play, right?

SCOTTY: That might be the case if the opponents weren't the slaughterers of millions.

KENNETH: What?

SCOTTY: Well, combined, maybe. And not necessarily directly.

KENNETH: Then they're not really...

SCOTTY: Just roll the highlights! Dancougar, Prux, Oxen Cup! Eighth minute, sight of goal for the Prawns, as Hernan Cortes comes bringing the pox and the pain... hard shot that bends wide, but Vaccarino dives to punch it wide. Another in the fifteenth, as Cortes gets past Fey and has it tackled out by Ieyasu before he can pull the trigger. Minute twenty three, now, and we get the first goal of the match. But it's the Prawns who fall behind... Alexander loses the ball in the midfield to Hayashi, who begins the counterattack. Hayashi... to Brittain... and he slips the ball through to Saito, who pounds it home to make it 1-0 to the Wings. Take another look, as the defensive back three is caught in the rush, and not even Rommel can hold the line steady, letting Saito get past.

KENNETH: But just before halftime, Prux responds. Tomokazu fouls Cortes twenty five yards out, and he fancies his chances. The service is good, into the box, header... Gee Wash! I CANNOT TELL A LIE, IT WAS I WHO CHOPPED DOWN YOUR ONE GOAL LEAD! Washington gets a tricky bounce off his wig and catches Vaccarino off guard, and we're all square at one. Early second half, Prux looking to ride that momentum. Zheng He makes a run for the ages here, from his own half of the field... come along and ride on a fantastic VOYAGE...!!! Everything but the finish! Scooped up over the bar, when he had help from Shaka and Bonaparte.

SCOTTY: You might say the latter is dynamite.

KENNETH: If we weren't both making bad jokes, I'd hit you for that.

SCOTTY: The Wings refuse to be intimidated by their opponents, or at least they did a good job of making it appear that way. Sundling is in, and he engineers a goal in the seventy first minute. The substitute hooks up with Alexei Voronzoff, who cuts back and beats the defense, a low shot... goal! Voronzoff nets his first international goal to give Dancougar the lead back, 2-1. But for a team that's already come back from the dead once, can you really say they're down and out? Shaka, working on Ieyasu, crosses into the box... Vaccarino punches it wide... but Robert E. Lee with the volley! THE SOUTH SHALL RISE AGAIN! Prux get the equilizer, minute eighty five, and it's a point apiece. It ends 2-2.

KENNETH: Hal Sanantonio is in Las Vitas, and Hal, Dancougar is now level with Prux on four points and has Land de Wood next. And then a big game against group favorites Milchama.

HAL: Do they, Ken? Do they really?

KENNETH: Unless we've read the schedule wrong yet again.

HAL: That's the thing, guys, we thought it would be easy to not mix up 6vX with 6vY, yet here we are. So to be fair, let's just run down the next three games and assume that whatever order they're actually in, as opposed to the order we think they're in, we'll get one of them right.

SCOTTY: Fair enough. So we've got Land de Wood, who've got a point now, and are tied with kenavt. Milchama lead the group with the maximum six points from two games, and Acapais have none. So we've got quite a sample going forward.

HAL: Absolutely, Scott. Land de Wood were just as confused as we were, and I won't be surprised if both teams fail to find the stadium before their clash, irregardless of the fact that all Group C games are at the same place. Land de Wood showed some mettle against kenavt after fighting back from an opening minute goal against. Milchama... well, we knew Bugsy Borker was good, but apparently he's insanely good. Then again, this team can win with a banana in goal, so this is actually a step up. And then there's Acapais, which have had the misfortune to open against Prux and Milchama.

KENNETH: Thanks for that, Hal, and we'll have full coverage of the match, against whoever it happens to be, on DSPN and DSPN-HD.

SCOTTY: We think.

******************************

Something seemed oddly familiar about the place. Russ and Peter looked around. They'd flown over several cities in Qazox on their last trip, and they were having a hard time getting their bearings on the ground. Never mind that the previous trip had been cooked up in some virtual world by some crazy guy in Prux... who, by the way, had drawn the Wings 2-2 the previous day, so Peter was kind of bummed about that.

"So... there's no ducks this time, or lawyers, right?" asked Russ, looking around. "I've had my fill of bizarre adventures, although I have to say, that match fixing buggery back home is mind-numbing."

"Um... yes, Russ, it sure is!" replied Peter quite loudly and conspicuously. Russ just shook his head and continued onward. Peter was weird like that. Man, I should've brought the Suck Note with me. Who knows how many more cups that side story will last, and then it's back to being regular old... well, okay, that won't happen, we'll just a different adventure...

The Kingdom of Dancougar's Omake Theater Presents
"Better Know an RP Character"

Russ is the first one into the booth. Peter has wandered off to look at shiny things, namely the statue of the Holy Ox. There's bound to be one somewhere in this city, at least. And it's probably shiny. Then again, it could be made of granite. That would be disappointing, but at least it would keep him busy for now. Russ sits back and tries to get comfortable. "Hey everyone, I'm Russ Pauli. Graduated from the University of Helmut with a business degree, with a secondary concentration in whatever von Steuben wanted us to do."

To drive the point home, he takes out his wallet. Since he's currently without a girlfriend or a steady job, the only pictures he has were the ones the wallet came with, as well as things he's been through over the last few World Cups. "So, here's me and Peter jumping a chicken on a motorcycle over a flaming vat of rubber chickens... and here's me diving clear of an exploding cabin... oooh, and let's not forget, me in von Steuben's god damn computer lab programming his football-playing chickens!" Is that you asleep at the keyboard with cooked ramen noodles on your head? "When did that happen?"

He puts his wallet away hurriedly and glares at the camera before continuing. "This is ridiculous... I'm supposed to be the straight man out of the two of us. We were supposed to be around just for comedic use, but eventually we turned into the guys who went out and did whatever was needed to make a side story work. Jacks of all trades, really. It's led to some very interesting out of character action, while in character. Can you believe Peter's supposed to be a part-time government agent with me? I know, right, the country's doomed."

Russ Pauli - twenty five years old, a hundred and sixty two pounds, and five foot ten: "Yeah, somehow we've been around for three World Cups and hardly aged at all... I guess that's the magic of continuity. You can follow it or ignore it as you wish. We may see generations of players come and go before we're retired. Then we'll get retconned as some alternate universe or timeline. That seems to be the popular way to handle these things."

Russ exits the booth and Peter walks in. He's already taken care of his business and sports a "Shiny Holy Ox Statue" tee and baseball cap. He sits down and throws a peace sign at the camera. "Hey all, I'm Peter Klingenschmidt. I room with Russ because we both suffer from job fail. Oh, and get this..." He leans in close for a whisper. "I'm actually the wielder of the Suck Note, except nobody can figure it out because they'd never suspect the idiot!"

He leans back. The camera lens is covered with fog from him breathing on it, but he doesn't notice and continues talking. He fades back into view very slowly. "So yeah, where to begin... so, we started during the Baptism of Fire and did some rather silly, stupid skits... and that carried into a chicken sacrifice bonanza during 39 quals. So, naturally, during World Cup 40, we did a secret agent storyline, because that's obviously what we were set up for."

Peter wipes some sweat form his brow before continuing. Running all over the city looking for a statue tired him out. "I'm supposed to be the silly one, but when I need to be, I can turn on the serious. I have skills like that." Peter Klingenschmidt - twenty five years old, five foot eleven, and a hundred and sixty two pounds: "I make a really awful Light Yagami, don't you think? Well, I kind of like having some power for once, so you're stuck with me! Mwahahaha!" He laughs maniacally as he exits the booth. Hey... show some restraint!

Text time, a special "Better Know an RP Character," Russ and Peter spend the day with Sergeant Sagara Sousuke and learn how they can be better in their roles of competent secret agent, stupid in real life. And there might be football. Might.

Newmanistan

16-07-2008, 22:41

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS AVENGE CUP OF HARMONY LOSS

New Recife, Qazox- 45 minutes and an annoying database error. That’s all it took for the Rockets to avenge their loss against Sorthern Northland in the Cup of Harmony. Alright, maybe it just felt that way! After defeating the Blouman Empire, another team that had a decent Cup of Harmony performance that fell short, this time a Newmanistan- Sorthern Northland match had the Rockets as the team wanting a little payback. Led by outstanding defensive play in the backfield, that payback was sustained, a clean sheet delivered, and two wins in two games for Newmanistan in the Oxen Cup.

The looks on the faces of the players told the story. They knew each other. Last time, it was Sorthern Northland that had the last laugh, but this was a different tournament. It might be too early to call this a rivalry officially, but you just never know. After all there seems to be a tie between and those Kosenic Turks. Well, they were at war recently, but you never do truly know. The early stages of the game saw both teams wanting to set the tempo, and as such the game was bogged down in midfield to the casual observer, but to those on the pitch the action was very intense. Sorthern Northland slowly began to take some control of the overall possession battle, but they didn’t really generate many chance. There was one opportunity in the 19th minute where Corey Hennis had to make a decent save. Not a spectacular one, but he had to be alert, and he was. Defensively the Rockets were responsible, despite a 27th minute yellow card to Jeremy Brooker, for a rough tackle. Around the 35th minute mark, the game became another midfield tug of war, with neither team surrendering an inch. The only shot on target by the Rockets in the first half was in the 40th by Kevin Lewis, but it was never really a test to the Northland’s keeper.

On entertainment value, the first half probably gets a 2 out of 10. But on the pitch, the players from both sides were all working hard and it was truly an intense match. Coach Andrews was pleased with the defensive performance of the team, especially with the way that they were handling the Northerners top goal scoring threats. The second half also began defensively, but this time Newmanistan seemed to be having more of the possession, and were generating chance on net. None were a real great test though, until the 58th minute. A fall by a Sorthern Northland defender allowed Alex Parnett to have a lot of extra running room to set up a play on goal, and he did just that, waiting until the perfect time to deliver the perfect cross. He did, to Jeremy McAllister. Cross. Header. Score. 1-nil Rockets! It was a huge breakthrough, and with the way the game was going, it looked like it could be enough. The Rockets did a good job of not sitting back immediately after the goal either, and continued to maintain possession advantages until approximately the 75th minute. Coach Andrews elected to sub in both Mark McCafferty and Eddie Chapman in place of Brett Prescott and Kevin Carrigan to give an ultra defensive look to the team. This achieved the desired result. Sorthern Northland’s efforts to tie up the game were denied, and the Rockets end up with the victory, a very hard fought, though not necessarily entertaining, 1-nil decision.

Land de Wood

16-07-2008, 22:56

Well before Andrew Wood annouced his team this evening, he kindly gave us the following interview.

Larry: So Andrew a bit of a surprise there, when Kenavt and not Dancougar turned out to be your opponents.
Andrew: Yes it was a bit of a surprise and unfortunately caught my players by surprise. But they pulled themsleves together and got on with the job, and I'm pleased they picked up their first point of the tournament.
Larry: Will you be lodging any form of protest with the authorities against what was obviously a dirty tricks campaign by Dancougar?
Andrew: While I'm sure the organisers take note of these things, we have to hold our hands up and say we should have double checked who our opponents were to be. However, I am pleased to say I have double checked the fixture list and am sure it is Dancougar we will face. We will let our football do the talking.
Larry: So any special plans to deal with Dancougar's threat?
Andrew: No, I was pleased with the performance of most of our players, though Larry Derby doesn't seem to be performing quite as well as I hoped, so he is going to sit this game out.
Larry: So you were happy with your decision to leave out Stephen Sterland?
Andrew: Yes, don't get me wrong Stephen's a good player but I was impressed by Richard Wilson and feel his pace at the back will be important.
Larry: So who is coming in for Larry Derby?
Andrew: Well I've had a good think about this, I did have the option of switching to a diamond formation and recalling Steve Eclair or our goal scorer Richard Higgins but I am slightly concerned by Richard's lack of stamina, I don't feel he'll last an entire game and is better used as a supersub. So I've opted for young David Clemance, he'll play slightly more forward than Larry Derby did.
Larry: So we are going to see the infamous Christmas Tree formation?
Andrew: Yes, and hopefully we can light up the stadium.
Larry: I take it, we'll be playing attackive football as always?
Andrew: Indeed, we are here to entertain as well as to win.
Larry: Thank you for that Andrew, good to speak to you and good luck.
Andrew: Thanks and have a good night.

And so here is the selected team:
formation is the Christmas Tree, style: attackive (+1):
Patrick Clemence
David Aimer Gary Lewis Richard Wilson Woodrow Derby
Richard Butty
Aaran Whitemore Stephen Redrow
Ray Horse David Clemence
Gary Hoggins

Cafundeu

16-07-2008, 23:47

GAZETA DO POVO - ALL THAT YOU WANT TO KNOW IS HERE!
Sports Section - articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

FIRST TWO GAMES END IN POSITIVE RESULTS

Cafundéu's team started well the Oxen Cup, with two victories: one against Lovisa and other against Nire and Nire. In these games, the players showed all their will to get the wins, and to show their abilities to Júlio Mercegues. The Oxen Cup coach will later send the information collected about the Oxen Cup players to the coach of the main National Team Eduardo Bosschaart, who will call some of them to play in World Cup 42 (the qualifiers or already the proper one, if Cafundéu hosts it).

In the first game against Lovisa, the whole team did and excellent job, and the Monopolists could get a very good 3x0 win. Goals were scored by Fausto, Marossi and Renildo, which start in front of the others in the pursuit for a main NT place. Marossi was the man of the match, and his goal was the most beautiful of the first round.

In the second game, the defence failed a bit, something that can cost the Bosschaart call for some players. Nire and Nire was able to score two goals, but that wasn't enough to stop Cafundéu. Marossi scored twice, while Aristóteles scored other two goals to give the victory to the Monopolists, which are now with six points.

Newmanistan

17-07-2008, 03:45

(Team is gathered at the women’s beach volleyball game. Read our RP in the Qazox sports festival thread first to truly “get” this one, if you care.)

McAllister: My sister’s coming out now.

Several Players: Woohoo go Newmanistan!

Drummond: And here it comes, we’ve been spotted.

Lewis: The dreaded line of kids wanting autographs.

Parnett: I told you we should have worn the disguises, now we’ll never be able to concentrate on watching the hot chicks play volleyball.

Brooker: Yes it stinks.

McAllister: (Signs autograph) Here you go. Yeah, Alex is right, we were going good until you guys shouted Go Newmanistan! That erased all doubts of our identity. Hey fans, you know that’s my sister out there. (Hardly anyone looks)

Fan: Jeremy you’re my favorite, you’re the bestest can you sign all 150 cards of you that I have.

McAllister: Did you all know we were gonna be here or something?

Carrigan: I’m sorry.

Drummond: You blow our cover?

Carrigan: I accidentally may have said something on an early morning radio interview, yes.

Drummond: Way to go, Kevin. Way to go.

McAllister: Sorry son, it’s a long line, I’ll sign five. Pick your favorites.

Fan: Awwww (starts to cry)

Parnett: (signs autograph) You can never win.

Brooker: They just lost the first set. Didn’t see any of it (signs autograph), but I can see the scoreboard.

McAllister: Damn, I couldn’t even watch any of it, she must feel terrible that the eyes of the Empire are on us in the stands while she’s out there busting her ass out there doing what she has trained so long and hard for.

Drummond: Yeah those modeling shoots I hear, are tough.

(Brittany Phillips races up)

Phillips: Hey everyone. See these! (Reactions vary depending on age and gender) That’s where the action is, now let’s pay attention.

McAllister: Brittany always was the wild one.

Brooker: Wow.

Drummond: Double wow.

Parnett: Good, most of the people are going to watch the beach volleyball now, maybe we can get some of it in too.

Drummond: I think I’m rooting for Brittany instead of Katie now.

McAllister: Sad that it took that to get people to pay attention. But anyway now maybe I relax a little more and watch my sister.

Brooker: Will Katie ever do what Brittany just did?

Drummond: Get Brittany’s number for me, man.

McAllister: Shawn, you’ve always been a friend ever since we began playing in the Di Bradini Cup together. I trust you. Here. (Gives him Brittany’s number). I already knew it.

Drummond: Hell yeah!

Parnett: Can I see?

Drummond: Nope, all mine!!

Green wombat

17-07-2008, 04:12

A 3-2 win over Devildogma keeps the Wombats hopes alive for the 2nd round. But with games vs. Jeruselem and Kose and The Turkomans looming, the chances are slim, but an upset or two and maybe this team can advance.

Two goals from Luisa Credle in the first half gave the Wombats the lead, but two goals early in the second half by Devildogma tied it up. But in the 74th minute Leslie Mcilwain broke the tie and the team held on for with win.

Kose and the Turkomans is next, and a win could move the team into first place.

Jeruselem

17-07-2008, 04:50

Catholic Weekly

Sister Marsha voted Nun of the Year

Jeruselem World Cup 41 assistant coach and Oxen 7 coach, Sister Marsha has been voted Nun of the Year by Jeruselemites.

Sister Marsha grew up in small village in Jeruselem. She was the only daughter of two farmers. One day, a group of bandits razed her village killing her parents and destroying everything she owned. Many young girls were raped and killed but Marsha hid in a pool of smelly mud to hide from her attackers.

The Catholic Church took her in as an orphan and she joined an order. Unlike her counterparts, she was very questioning and inquisitive about things. She watched football one day and got interested in it. She was getting into trouble for being different but she defended herself very well. Seeing Sister Marsha had a bit of energy to burn, the church make her coach teams of schoolchildren as most Nuns as had trouble relating to kids. She is an obsessive researcher, accumulating a library larger than her own order's library.

Sister Marsha came to the attention of the Jeruselem FA and she soon took a team of girls including the two Sallad sisters and Jenny Sloan to Winning the Turtle Cup I.

In her normal dress she looks any other Nun. Outside, she looks more like the type of girl you'd find in a nightclub. Her blonde hair, squeaky voice and naive looks make her very attractive for a Nun. While she may not rival any Sallad or Dallas or a Kool girl - she's still a someone a guy would like to pick up in at a bar.

Recently she coached our OXen Cup 7 team to a draw with current World Cup 41 champions Starblaydia. Something not to be laughed at. Our Sister Marsha may not look like winning coach, but God gave her a new start in life and she's grasped it. From a homeless girl in a destroyed village, she's now a model for future Nuns to prove being a Nun doesn't mean being boring. Sister Marsha has proven to world a bride of Christ can make an positive impact to the world and be a good woman at the same time.

She works with sinners like those Dallas and Sallad girls but is untainted. She's a fantastic communicator and nice person. Her status as pinup girl for Nuns hasn't changed her. She's working hard for glory of God, Jeruselem and her own salvation in the eyes of God. Well deserved.

Qazox

17-07-2008, 05:04

RP Cutoff Time.

Qazox

17-07-2008, 05:32

MATCHDAY THREE SCORES aka Business as Usual

(winners in BOLD, Draws in Italics)

GROUP A @ Henrí Savagé Stadium, New Recife, Capacity: 73,000
Qazox 2-2 Newmanistan
Arrundeu 4-3 The Blouman Empire
West Zirconia 1-1 Sorthern Northland

GROUP B @ Estadio Azul Flores, Iguana de Mia, Capacity: 71,000
Jeruselem 5-1 Devildogma
Kose and the Turkomans 2-3 Green wombat
Solenial 1-3 Starblaydia

GROUP C @ Toro Rojo Stadium, Las Vitas, Capacity: 70,000
Milchama 1-0 Prux
Acapais 1-0 kenavt
Land de Wood 1-2 Dancougar

GROUP D @ Vogg War Memorial Stadium, Vogg City, Capacity: 69,594
New Zomboria 3-5 Cafundeu
Retired Tourists 0-2 Yafor 2
Lovisa 0-3 Nire and Nire

STANDINGS AFTER MD 3
(Eliminated teams in RED
Quarterfinalists in BLUE)

Group A W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Qazox 2-1-0 7 8 5 +3
Newmanistan 2-1-0 7 5 2 +3
S. Northland 1-1-1 4 5 3 +2
Arrundeu 1-1-1 4 5 7 -2
West Zirconia 0-2-1 2 2 4 -2
Blouman Empire 0-0-3 0 5 9 -4

Sorthern Northland in 3rd based on H2H win over Arrundeu.

Group B W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Jeruselem 2-1-0 7 10 3 +7
Starblaydia 2-1-0 7 8 3 +5
Green wombat 2-0-1 6 7 8 -1
K. & T. T. 2-0-1 6 7 4 +3
Devildogma 0-0-3 0 4 11 -7
Solenial 0-0-3 0 2 9 -7

Green wombat in 3rd based on H2H win over Kose and the Turkomans.

Group C W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Milchama 3-0-0 9 8 1 +7
Dancougar 2-1-0 7 6 3 +3
Prux 1-1-1 4 6 6 --
Acapais 1-0-2 3 5 7 -2
kenavt 0-1-2 1 1 4 -3
Land de Wood 0-1-2 1 2 7 -5

Group D W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Cafundeu 3-0-0 9 12 5 +7
Yafor 2 3-0-0 9 11 4 +7
Nire & Nire 1-0-2 3 7 8 -1
Lovisa 1-0-2 3 2 7 -5
Retired Tourists 0-1-2 1 3 6 -3
New Zomboria 0-1-2 1 7 12 -5

Cafundeu in 1st on GS.
Cafundeu has clinched Quarterfinal berth due to H2H sweep vs. Nire and Nire and Lovisa.
Nire and Nire is eliminated due to being swept H2H vs. Cafundeu and Yafor 2.

Dancougar

17-07-2008, 06:00

KENNETH: A bag of dirty tricks... that's what some in the Land de Wood media are saying following a major gaffe by DSPN and Dancougar FA officials. The conspiracy theory is that Dancougar were hoping to disorient the newcomers by throwing off their tournament preparations. Charles DuPont denied the claims, saying he was just as confused by the signals he got leading up to the Prux game, a 2-2 draw. Would it fuel his team's fire against Andrew Wood's boys?

SCOTTY: Game number three in the Oxen Cup group stage, and this one would simmer for awhile at a low boil. First half action, and we pick things up in the sixth minute, and it's Dancougar with the first scoring chance of the game. Heckendorf robs Eclair of the ball and starts the counterattack. He pushes it up to Brittain, who runs into space. Lots of time. Has help. A cross into the box finds the head of Blaine Culverhouse, but he mistimes the jump and it skids off the side of his head and out of play. And Blaine wants that one back. He nearly gets it in minute twenty, when Voronzoff's low cross deflects off Sterland and lands at his feet, but he hesitates and the shot is scooped up by Clemence.

KENNETH: Land de Wood attack, minute thirty two, corner kick. Aaron Whitemore sends it into the box, and Hoggins heads it in, reaction save by Vaccarino. Ieyasu's clearance is poor, straight up into the air, and the second header by Eclair is saved. A panic at the back for the Wings. But in minute thirty six, the scoring is opened by Kano Saito, who beats Clemence to the near post with a shot around the defender. Screened, and it's going to take a friendly bounce off the post and in, so Dancougar leads it 1-0. Nice give and go with Brittain, and then he sweeps around Aimer for the shot.

SCOTTY: Wood sends his men forward in the second half to find that equilizer, and minute fifty six, watch Woodrow Derby take off down the side and whip in a cross. But it skips over everyone and out of play, too much on it. But it's the second long run by a defender against the Black Wings, and Charles DuPont is visibly displeased. Then in minute sixty four, Derby feeds Whitemore, who gets off a much better cross. Controlled on the chest by Redrow, volleyed... deflected out by Ieyasu, who just sticks his foot into the play. Yields a corner, but nothing comes of it.

KENNETH: Dancougar gets what appears to be insurance in the seventy second, as Sterland fouls Shigekazu Hayashi thirty yards from goal. Clemence sets up his wall, and Voronzoff tells the team what he thinks of that wall... a hard shot that goes up and bends down at goal! BUT CLEMENCE MAKES THE SPECTACULAR DIVING SAVE... oooooh, but the rebound falls right to Kawaguchi, who slides it home coolly to make it 2-0! And Clemence can't believe it, after everything he did to stop the free kick, an absolute bomb from Voronzoff. But rather than get deflated, it stirs Land de Wood to action. Minute seventy five. Woodrow Derby with the cross, and headed down by Hoggins... and the other Derby, Larry, meets it at the top of the eighteen! Searing shot! Vaccarino is helpless! And it's back to a one goal game, fifteen minutes left, and now it's game on.

SCOTTY: Andrew Wood brings in Ray Horse to ride that wave of momentum, and in minute eighty one it nearly pays off. Horse gets the pass from Wallace, and he pulls Heckendorf out of position. Slides the ball to Whitemore on the side... does he have another magical cross in him? Very nearly!! Fey arrives too late to the play, and the ball swings out... Ieyasu wins the header, cleared away! Dancougar would milk the clock and get one last chance late, this shot over the bar by Kano Saito... a win is a win! Dancougar move into sole position of second place in Group C; they win it 2-1.

KENNETH: We take a look at the stats, and this was really a game of two halves. The first half, neither team really found any rhythm, lots of buildup but nothing really coming at the end of it. A lot more pace to the second. More scoring chances. And the Wings hold off a late charge by Land de Wood, who once again showed that they've got a lot of fight in them. After the game, DuPont talks about offense.

DUPONT (interview clip): We weren't generating enough chances, especially in the first half. I felt like we had plenty of time with the ball, but weren't really able to do anything with it. The guys need to work more on their passing if we're going to beat Bork... er, Milchama, since they're an incredibly fast pla... er, team. More running off the ball, crisper passing.

IEYASU (interview clip): Holding onto a game is pretty tough, uh, you know the other team is going to be coming at you. And if you're not able to get anything going on the other end of the field, you're never going to be able to rest easy. It bites you, like, "Oh no, if I make a mistake, is it one point instead of three?" Things like that.

CULVERHOUSE (interview clip): Uh, more patience, I think. Their defense was really mobile, they were overlapping all over the field, and we need to know how to deal with that. Uh, I think that if we keep trying to sleepwalk through these games... it's going to be tough against anyone, if you can't generate chances.

KENNETH: DuPont says that he's going to up the intensity of his offensive workouts and switch to what he calls, quote, "a plus two style," unquote. What this means, or how effective it will be, we're not yet sure.

Blouman Empire

17-07-2008, 09:09

OOC: Shit when did this start? I missed it completely, I was off NS for 2 days so hardly surprising, and my absence hasn't even helped the team.

IC:

<The office of the Chief of the FFB Sir George Fawlings, with him is Director of International Football Kyle Fryter and Chairman of the FFB Board Count Ahron Mallard>

Fawlings: What are these reports I am getting of the Blouman Empire losing three games at the OXEN Cup?

Fryter: I have no idea I was sure that the tournament started a month from now

Mallard: Well obviously not, how could you screw this up? Why haven't you sent the Keith Street Enders of to Qazox?

Fryter: I don't understand and none of the media have picked up that it has started yet.

Fawlings: Thank goodness and what about all the marketing we have been doing for this? I better call Henry up and get him to stop it.

Mallard: What I want to know is who the hell is playing for us if no teams are over there?

Fawlings: That's what I want to know any ideas Kyle?

Fryter: Well according to my sources it is a 16 Bloumans who have been living in Qazox for some time, they formed a team and play in some amateur league in Qazox a low division too.

Fawlings: What!!! What type of uniforms are they wearing and what team are they saying they are?

Fryter: They say they are the Blouman Empire and Qazox officials have believed them especially as they rocked up in uniforms very similar to what we wore at the last Cup of Harmony.

Mallard: What forgeries?

Fryter: My sources say merchandise shirts, socks shorts, they have brought it and stitched in their names and numbers in it

Mallard: And OXEN Cup officials didn't notice anything strange after all a bunch of out of shape players who they would never have heard of at any other international events?

Fryter: Well no, after all we don't send our international team or our best club side and really let's be honest here Keith Street were just lucky winning the FFB Cup this year and really didn't deserve to win the cup.

Mallard: Well what are we going to do can we send the proper team out there now?

Fryter: There wouldn't be much point there are only two games left and they haven't won any so far and are all ready eliminated.

Fawlings: All we can do is issue a press release informing that we missed the boat to send a team to the OXEN Cup, a few ex-pats fooled everybody and competed as the international side of football. And Kyle you can call up Keith Street and tell them why they won't be competing in the OXEN Cup.

Fryter: They won't be happy, and you know what a temper Ernst has.

(Fryter leaves)

Mallard: Well that's another black mark against his name

Fawlings: It's not looking good is it?

Mallard: No and not for you either, after all you are his boss, and if this sort of thing continues the board will be looking elsewhere when your contract expires

Fawlings: Well we shall see after all my position means I am on the board

Mallard: If you think you have enough support and we can always leave it till your term expires and then find someone else, you know Baron von Milken is going to be raising his hand again.

Fawlings: Don't worry I will reach my performance objectives, Kyle is another matter, and I doubt that he will reach his recently revised objectives by the time the 43rd World Cup.

Mallard: Well get that press release out and send an email about this incident to every board member ASAP, I will see you next week at the board meeting, I am sure this will be the first thing we will talk about and there you can explain yourself. Good Afternoon.

(Mallard leaves)

Fawlings: See you then, (under breath) you pompous bastard.

Land de Wood

17-07-2008, 12:37

So it was back to the action and time for our team to let their football do the talking. Following Dancougar's misinformation putting our boys of in their last match, could our boys get revenge?

Andrew Wood lined them up in a Christmas Tree formation as he searches for the right makeup for his team.
Things start slowly with not much to talk about for the first half hour apart from a couple of chances for Dancougar that come to nothing.
IN the 32nd minute our best chance of the first half came after good work down the wing by Aaron Whitemore who crossed it in for Hoggins to head home, or so he thought but a great reaction save by Vaccarino saved the day. Apparently Eclair who started the game as a subsitute had come on at this point, ah yes, we are just hearing David Clemence picked up an injury and had come of.
But our boys momentum was cut short by Kano Saito scoring for Dancougar.
In the 40th minute Woodrow Derby made a good run down the left and crossed it in, Hoggins heading home, but the flag is up for offside. Hoggins was booked for complaining, and replays show he was actually just onside but its what the referee and his assistants see that counts.
A few minutes later the teams headed in at half time and thanks to that injustice, our boys were 1-0 down.
Woodrow Derby starts the 2nd half as he ended the 1st half, making some lovely runs down the left hand wing overlapping Stephen Redrow but the strikers fail to make it pay.
Then Woodrow Derby played the ball across the field to Whitmore who played it back into the middle but Redrow's shot is knocked out for a corner, where was Hoggins to knock it in.
With Redrow failing to make any real progress down the left and Derby doing well overlapping him, Redrow is subsituted for Larry Derby who comes on in the middle of the park allowing Woodrow Derby to move up to wing back as the team goes 3-5-2.
Then in the 70th minute (not second as those misinformates at Dancougar Sportscentre would have you believe) Stephen Sterland makes a brave tackle surely winning the ball but the referee would you believe it gives them a free kcik and books Stephen Sterland (who presumably had also come on for David Aimer to make the 3 man defence, that's the 3 subs they are allowed to make).
As if to add to the injustice despite a spectacular save from Clemence, Dancougar score from the resulting attack. 2-0 down and our boys have been harshly done by. With 1 goal disallowed and 1 goal against coming from a dodgy refereeing decision.
Then 75 minutes gone, and Woodrow Derby gets down the wing again well, Hoggins knocks it down and sub Larry Derby makes a claim for a place in the starting 11 and scores a goal.
Then in the 81st minute, Ray Horse who started the game and has been drifting out wide is told by the manager to stay inside, Horse plays in Wallace [who presumably had come on as a 4th sub, news to me that we were allowed 4 subs, but that's how Dancougar sportscentre have reported it]. The ball is played out to Whitemore who hits it just too long.
The game ends 2-1 but rumours are an official protest maybe lodged by Land de Wood against that referee.
We wait to hear from the organisers if Gary Lewis faces a suspension for his 2 yellow cards and also confirmation that Land de Wood were allowed to make the 4 subs that Dancougar sportscentre said we made. (either that or someone didn't read our starting 11 properly!)

Newmanistan

17-07-2008, 14:19

THE ROCKET REPORT

DRAW WITH QAZOX SHOULD BE FINE

New Recife, Qazox- After posting back to back clean sheets in their first two games, the host nation finally was able to put one by Corey Hennis. They did that twice, as the Rockets and Phoenix (OOC: I assume this is still your team name), played to a 2-2 draw in front of a capacity crowd at Henri Savage Stadium. A highly entertaining game on the pitch and a larger then expected Newmanistanian representation in the stands simply made for a ton of excitement. In the end both teams will take the draw. For Newmanistan, a 2-1-0 record with Arrundeu and West Zirconia as the final opponents should make us feel pretty good about our chances of advancement. Arrundeu is the next opponent, and although they are coming off a big 4-3 win over the Blouman Empire, that probably just means Margaret let them have their day already.

This was the first time that Newmanistan and Qazox actually had met in world football. That could surprise some, because these two have seen each other on several occasions before, including three meetings over the course of World Bowl I. All three, went to Qazox. Then, they met in the knockouts of the 6th World Cup of Hockey. Victory, again, to Qazox. But then came redemption for everything. We could mean none other then the 7th World Baseball Classic where Qazox looked to be the ultimate team to beat, right here in the Q Continuum. Newmanistan got their revenge, and knocked the Phoenix out of the tournament. Given the tendency of both nations to participate in many competitions, this could be a budding rivalry. And in the stands, you could hear it. Qazox fans still obviously were in the majority, but they seemed a little agitated by the amount of blue and white joining them in the seats, reminding them about the World Baseball Classic. In turn, came the reminders about the World Bowl. On the field, the players from both teams fed off that energy, and rewarded the fans with great action out there, a far cry from the Rockets last game with Sorthern Northland. Both goalkeepers had to come up with a big stop in the games first minute as the chances went from one end to the other. In the 19th, Erica von Stuben, blasted a shot by Corey Hennis, ending his Oxen Cup shutout streak and putting the Phoenix up by one. Hennis was a little slow to react as the shot seemed to look as though it would go over the bar, but a sudden arc saw the ball go just underneath. Hennis misread it, and obviously wanted it back. He wouldn’t get it back, but he would make amends for it with a couple of unbelievable saves in the next ten minutes that followed as Qazox looked to carry on the momentum. Then suddenly, as Qazox over committed on the attack, an errant pass which was intercepted by Jeremy Brooker and sent up field to Brett Prescott caught the Phoenix defenders up to far. Prescott delivered a perfect pass to Jeremy McAllister, and with a smooth and seemingly effortless move to get around Lance Alread, J-Mac was in alone on the goalkeeper. Henrietta Falo was hopeless, as would any other keeper. J-Mac delivers a 32nd minute equalizer, getting the Rockets fans in the stands back up to their feet once again. This is where we would head to intermission.

Fast forward to the second half, and Newmanistan struck very quickly. In the 47th minute, it was Kevin Lewis getting his first of the tournament, after taking a nice pass down low from McAllister. The Rockets were now in front 2-1, and the chants in the crowd were clear. “Faaaaaa-looooo, Faaaaaaa-loooooo, you suck!” Newmanistan continued the pressure, and in the 58th minute, they put another ball behind Falo. Sure, the pass from Shawn Drummond to Jeremy McAllister saw J-Mac clearly be offsides, and there was no doubt about it, and never an argument by any Rockets, but the mere sight of the ball being in the net again behind Falo reignited the derogatory chants. The Qazox fans had several chants of their own to make up for it, and while we couldn’t quite make out exactly what they were saying, they had a good time chanting it. Qazox seemed to get a little fired up with J-Mac putting the ball in the net after a clear whistle. It started with Lance Alread shoving him to the ground in the 63rd minute while he thought the referee wasn’t looking. But he was, and showed him a bit of a yellow. Two minutes later, Brett Prescott showed Mr. Alread that you don’t be doing that to McAllister with a hard shove to the ground and “accidental” stepping on his hand. Not hard, but enough to get the point across. Prescott was given a yellow of his own. Afterwards, both teams settled down and focused on football, and in the 75th minute, Gia Hernandez fired home a perfectly placed shot off a brilliant cross from Pauline DelAmico to tie the game back up at 2. For the remainder of the time, both teams played very conservatively. If they saw an opportunity they went for it, but neither team was about to force anything. They both knew what the standings would look like, and while you never want to play for a draw, well, both teams seemed to realize that would be a better option then risking the defeat.

Starblaydia

17-07-2008, 14:48

I Give My Opponent Permission
(and actively encourage them) To:
====================
Choose My Scorers
GodMod Any Goalscoring Events
Yellow Card Players
GodMod Other Events for Humorous Intent
====================

Notes:
1) The best starting eleven are numbered 1-11 and are in bold

2) I actively encourage, nay nearly demand, that if you RP first you pick my scorers (if any).

3) * Denotes female player, ^ Denotes Dwarf player.

4) Starblaydia will perform the Raiigar (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Raiigar.html) war dance before each match they play.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SFA-Logo.gif
Starblaydia's OXEN Cup 7 Roster
No longer on the back of a fag packet!

The Staff
LP. Lex Panarii (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Lex_Panarii.html), Manager, 48 - World Cup 41 Winning Manager, AOCAF 23 Winning Manager
33 Caps, 2 Goals (Uncapped at Under-21 Level)

The Goalkeepers
1. Caleb Westwood, GK, 29 - Fort Boston FC (Bostopia) - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
13. Eduardo De Rooij, GK, 32 - Tournetas - AOCAF 23 Winner
19. Jamar Wilson, GK, 23 - Paricone Athletic FC

The Defenders
2. Carlito Di Bradini, R/L/CB, 29 - CS Lac-Amédée (Septentrionia) - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
3. Bazrador Drakkiborgo^, L/CB, 27 - Karak Ungor Chiefs - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
6. Charles Buckstone, C/RB, 26 - Foxchester Raiders - AOCAF 23 Winner
11. Inithar Mazarbul^, SW, 28 - Karak Ungor Chiefs
12. Vega Matranga, C/RB, 30 - Jhanna City - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
14. Nei Samba, L/CB, 20 - Malta Lines
20. Louisa Logan*, CB, 18 - Unattached

The Midfielders
4. Jack Stafador, Captain, C/DM, 32 - Marquez-Onwere FC (Candelaria And Marquez) - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
5. Jaime Kuu, C/LM, 25 - Raynor City (Elves Securoty Forces) - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
7. Ricky England, R/CM, 22 - Penningworth United - AOCAF 23 Winner
8. Na-Me^, C/AM, 22 - Karak Ungor Chiefs
15. Panos Petropoulos, L/DM, 21 - Nemya Hotspurs
16. Karinha*, C/AM, 34 - FC Farça
17. Zii Kristof, RW, 29 - Beverington Hawks
21. Rashid Mus'haf, C/DM, 19 - Jhanna City

The Forwards
9. Daymon Callind, SC, 25 - Iskara Daii - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
10. Fenchurch Bentley*, SC/RW, 29 - Seoan Gukjei (Daehanjeiguk) - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
18. Raphael Torino, SC, 35 - IYC Uharan (Yafor 2) - World Cup 41 Winner
22. Jaison Debrier, CF, 26 - Fort Boston FC (Bostopia) - World Cup 41 Winner, AOCAF 23 Winner
23. Velat Thayil, SC, 21 - Cedrus Soundgardia

The Formation
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarOx7.jpg

Home And Away Kits:
Kits created by:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarHome4-1.jpghttp://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarAway4.jpg

West Zirconia

17-07-2008, 15:11

Good news for West Zirconia - they managed to keep a clean sheet.
Bad news for West Zirconia - so did Arrundeu.

The second Oxen Cup match was disappointing in comparison with the Qazox game, and they must count themselves lucky to have held on for a point. The partnership of Matthew Love and Steve Griffiths, which works to devastating effect at Banks, has been disappointing in this campaign, with the team's only goal to this point being scored by midfielder Ed French.

At the other end, Glenn Charlton must surely be causing both West Zirconian spectators and coach Roy Hazell some concern with his erratic displays. Arrundeu's only chance, which came midway through the second half, was entirely Charlton's fault, and it is a miracle that he didn't allow Arrundeu's strikers any other chances.

One change that will definitely have to be made was caused by Gareth Doyle's second booking in as many games, meaning he is suspended for the Sorthern Northland game. Lee Pritchard seems the obvious replacement, but there have been murmurings already about Roy Hazell playing four players from his own club (Banks), and a fifth may well prove too much for some.

West Zirconia 0-0 Arrundeu

Booked: Doyle (West Zirconia) 64

Attendance: 58,350

---------------------------------------------

Another, more creditable draw, between West Zirconia and Sorthern Northland will probably not be enough to keep West Zirconia in the competition, but their performance will give their supporters hope for future campaigns.

West Zirconia seemed more geared up for this one to begin with, with Lee Pritchard outstanding in his first match in the starting eleven. He himself narrowly missed with an audacious volley in the 19th minute, and set up Matthew Love ten minutes later, only for Love to hook his shot way over the crossbar.

No-one knows exactly was said in the Sorthern Northland dressing-room at half-time, but it was enough to bring them out, all guns blazing, in the second half. Steve Gray in the West Zirconian goal had a particularly busy time fending off the Sorthern Northland attack, until in the 75th minute he was beaten - by one of his own team-mates. Mike Faulkner, the Markham centre-back, attempted to clear the ball just outside the penalty area, but missed it - or, more accurately, sliced it just enough to deflect it past his helpless goalkeeper.

Two attacking-minded substitutions - Jerome Bennett for Glenn Charlton and Mark Young for Ian Hawthorne - almost paid off immediately when Bennett's shot was deflected by the Sorthern Northland goalkeeper. Bennett's persistence paid off in the end, as five minutes from the end, an Anthony McGowan pass fell at the feet of the Taylor's Cross marksman, who was left with the simplest of tap-ins, leaving the Sorthern Northland defenders to claim an offside that never was.

West Zirconia-------1-1-------Sorthern Northland
Bennett 85--------------------Faulkner 75 (og)

Attendance: 62,781

Dancougar

17-07-2008, 17:46

KENNETH: Retraction time on Sportscenter, and it's been coming frequently these past few days. Perhaps we just have it out for Land de Wood, although what's really going on is that the interns fail. All of them! The shot sheets provided for last night's highlight reels apparently used the Land de Wood starting eleven from their original roster release, and not the lineup they posted ahead of the match itself. As a result, it appeared as though Land de Wood used more substitutes than they were allowed, when that is clearly silly. Yet, their media have also run with the story, which begs the question... what exactly is going on? Media expert Stephen Colbert, what do you have to say on that?

STEPHEN: Wikiality!

KENNETH: That's marvelous. Needless to say, these errors have gone on for long enough, and are, as we said, the fault of the interns, not the experienced senior staff who are responsible for the fact checks.

SCOTTY: Or me and Ken here, even though we read everything that's handed to us without pausing for a moment to think about it.

KENNETH: Exactly. So the interns have been sacked, and hopefully we can move on. But there's another discrepancy we've discovered, and it has to do with the timing of Dancougar's second goal. We reported that it occurred in the seventy second minute, while the Land de Wood media have it down as taking place in minute seventy. Who is right? According to Professor Frederick von Steuben, both. Professor, what can you tell us about these timing differences?

VON STEUBEN: Zat ees ze goot qvestion, Ken, und to answer zat, ve must first ask ze qvestion of vat eet means to heff time een ze vorld. Ze states are all usink deefferent calendar seestems, und ze periods between tournaments are not uniform for ze parteecipants. Efen wissin ze seengle state, people do not age ze semm... Russ und Peter und myself, for eenstance, heff hardly aged efen zough ve heff seen ze national team grow.

KENNETH: So you're saying that there are multiple time bubbles in the world, each providing its own frame of reference. And the two minute difference is due to the fact that none of the frames, in which events are occurring and being observed, are synchronized?

VON STEUBEN: ... Yah, zat doos cover eet.

SCOTTY: Nice. Fist bump.

KENNETH: But what it doesn't answer is how others can perceive you not age even though you interact with them in what is perceived to be real time.

VON STEUBEN: ... Magick?

SCOTTY: Oh snap.

KENNETH: Moving right along... Bugsy Borker is the next opponent for the Black Wings, and he's won three games by himself. How exactly does he do it?

VON STEUBEN: Ze perception of zees Borker is zat he ees one man doink ze job of eleven, ploos subbink. But I seek zat vile eet ees true zat zees ees one man, eet ees not ze kess zat he ees a seengle entity. Allowing for qvantum effects, ve may be seink a handful of ze sousands or meellions of Bugsy Borkers livink in Milchama, und zees vuns happen to be ze vuns best at football. Eef you conseeder zat ze qvantum state of ze Borkers are leenked, zen you heff ze ultimate team, vich does not heff to communicate to communicate.

KENNETH: But people have been observing him play all this time, so shouldn't they all have collapsed into a single Bugsy Borker?

VON STEUBEN: ... Qviet, you.

SCOTTY: Double snap!!

KENNETH: Professor von Steuben, everyone. Now onto more of Sportscenter's heinous lies...

Newmanistan

17-07-2008, 22:46

(Prior to the match against Arrundeu)

Drummond: So where is Arrundeu, anyway?

Lewis: In some Democratic union place.

Drummond: So if they are so keen on democracy they may not appreciate playing an Empire?

Brooker: They beat the Bloumans.

Drummond: Everyone’s beating the Bloumans. They still haven’t recovered after Sadie Dallas led her troops to victory in the Cup of Harmony.

McAllister: Guys, this is one of *THOSE* games. You know exactly what I mean.

Parnett: We won’t choke. I think we’ve all learned our lesson from the World Cup qualifying and the Cup of Harmony.

McAllister: We’ve gotten that reputation a little bit. We must not, I repeat, MUST NOT lose to Arrundeu, or draw against them.

Andrews: Very good Jeremy. Look guys, I know that in the other tournaments under Brian Carson, there have been some struggles to win the games like this, but we must put that behind us. I know that Brian was doing the best that he could in those matches, and that sometimes things were blamed unfairly on him and on you, and not enough credit was given to the opposition. Arrundeu is a respectable opponent, and they are right in the thick of the Group A race, so no matter what their interregional experience may be to this point, they are just as capable of beating us as anyone else is. So, I need all of you to just go about playing the way you play.

Lewis: We are good enough when we play hard. We are not good enough when we think we can sleepwalk by an opponent.

Brooker: We’ll take care of business.

Prescott: Yeah, the Bloumans weren’t physical enough with them, which being the Blouman Empire, I’m not really that surprised about, but I feel if we instill that presence in this match, especially early, that they will know right away that things will be different. We’re off to a great start in this tournament, so let’s keep it rolling.

McAllister: I agree with you, Brett. We probably can get a little physical with them, anything that can create more room for us in front of their keeper.

Andrews: Corey, how are you feeling this evening?

Hennis: Good, ready to go coach. Watched the tapes you provided, especially of their last win, and the Bloumans were pretty sloppy in the back. I’m sure I’ll have better support then their keeper got, but if not, I will be there to make the stop, coach.

Lewis: We all believe in you, Corey.

Brooker: Damn right.

Andrews: Very good. Let’s not leave any points on the table here tonight, and go take care of business! I let you have your fun day, now it’s time to play.

McAllister: Absolutely, let’s get it done boys and girls!

Land de Wood

17-07-2008, 23:22

Well Dancougar sportscentre have done it again. Providing us with more false information this time, using an old team sheet to try and confuse as. Then they would have us try to believe that it was the fault of some intern, we've heard that one before, the problems lie at the top. Then they try and complain about us basing our reports on what they told us happened. I mean if they tell us things wrong then what do they expect. I mean it is not like we are capable of thinking for ourselves, we just picked up their tape of the game and reported what happened from there. Anyhow, I'm sure our prime minister and manager Andrew Wood will have a few words to say about this:

Larry: Good evening Andrew
Andrew: Good evening again Larry.
Larry: Well it has certainly been a confusing day.
Andrew: Yes, I hear that Dancougar sportscentre have been up to their tricks again.
Larry: So what really did happen?
Andrew: Well first I can categorially without hesitation say we did not use more than 3 subs in the game, in fact we only used 2 subsitutions, in the second half to try and get back in the game we switched to a 3-5-2 bringing on Larry Derby for Redrow and also Sterland for Aimer. At no time did Wallace come on, and while Clemence did come of the field of play for treatment in the first half I can confirm that he came back on and not Eclair as the Dancougar sportscentre would have you believe.
Larry: What about their 2nd goal which minute was it in? The 70th or the 72nd?
Andrew: Well by my clock it was certainly the 70th, I can only assume that Dancougar are hoping to cause further confusion in this tournament by claiming it was in the 72nd minute. These dirty tricks can continue no longer, I shall be contacting my opposite number in the Dancougar government to ask for an immediate letter of apology.
Larry: What about the refereeing decisions?
Andrew: Well I was shocked, there is obviously someone out there who doesn't like the new kids on the block, we come here to play good entertaining attackive football, but when we score a perfectly legitimate goal they disallow it and then a referee penalises our defenders even when we win the ball.
Larry: Surely any honourable team would agree to replay this game?
Andrew: Indeed I have petitioned Dancougar government to offer us a rematch. If they fail to agree, I shall then petition the organisers to penalise them for unsportsmanlike conduct which if I'm not mistaken is a yellow card offence and therefore would mean their entire team is yellow carded.
Larry: Talking about yellow cards, have you heard if Gary Lewis is going to be suspended for his two?
Andrew: No the organisers have not been in touch so Stephen Sterland is on hand to replace him, otherwise the defence will be the same as started the game.
Larry: So we are not going to see the 3-5-2 formation we saw in the second half of the last game?
Andrew: No, for this game we will be playing a 4-1-3-1-1 formation.
Larry: So we will see the return of Larry Derby?
Andrew: Indeed, he played well in the second half and took his goal well. He replaces David Clemence who is still feeling a bit sore.
Larry: Thank you and I wish you well in your petitions.
Andrew: Thank you.

And so here is the selected team:
formation is the 4-1-3-1-1, style: attackive (+1):
Patrick Clemence
David Aimer Gary Lewis Richard Wilson Woodrow Derby
Richard Butty
Aaran Whitemore Larry Derby Stephen Redrow
Ray Horse
Gary Hoggins

If the organisers do ban Gary Lewis he will be replaced by Stephen Sterland.

Green wombat

18-07-2008, 00:31

A thrilling 3-2 win over previously unbeaten Kose and the Turkomans move the Wombats into 3rd place with 2 matches left. But one of those two is against Jeruselem, and if somehow we can manage a win, then we control our destiny for the quarterfinals.

As for the K&TT match. (they sound like a phone company). This time the wombats trailed early, allowing goals in the 27th and 39th minutes. But a penalty kick goal in the 44th minute by Jill Caffey cut the lead to 2-1. The momentum from that goal carried into the 2nd half as Norris Menotti scored twice in the 63rd and 78th minute for the victory.

Up next is Solenial, who lost to Starblaydia 3-1. A win and the Wombats are still alive.

Dancougar

18-07-2008, 00:50

KENNETH: Harsh words from Land de Wood this evening following yesterday's confusing 2-1 Black Wing victory, in which media outlets from both nations, with ground zero being these DSPN studios, issued several inconsistent and factually impossible match reports that have created massive problems at the Land de Wood FA... after all, it's hard to prepare for a game when you can't be entirely sure about the status of the team or its personnel. Steve Teebone joins us now, and Steve, this isn't exactly the welcome to international football that Land de Wood thought they would get.

STEVE: It's not, Ken, and they do have a legitimate gripe against DSPN for issuing those reports. Decisions being made by Andrew Wood and the FA are somewhat dependent on accounts of the match, and if those accounts contain misinformation, it can have a ripple effect. Next thing you know, they think they're forced to sit players who really don't have any strikes against them, and vice versa, so it can have a negative impact on their play. I mean, they're not out of this thing yet, even though they need two wins and a lot of help in these final two games. Nevertheless, the fact that they've got a chance is why they need to be sure they bring their absolute best in both games.

KENNETH: Andrew Wood is calling for a rematch or a yellow card to the entire team for unsportsmanlike conduct. Is he going too far here?

STEVE: He's obviously got a lot on his mind right now and he's doing what he thinks is right for the team. But I do think he's taking it too far, and chiefly because the problem was not caused by the Dancougar team itself, but rather by DSPN, an unaffiliated third party. Now, we can say whatever we want about the game itself, but that doesn't change the fact that it was contested in front of Qazox tournament officials and won by the Wings. Now, it's unprofessional for our network to incorrectly report the lineups, mix a few things up in the report, but it doesn't really change the outcome or have any real impact on that game.

KENNETH: Is he trying, then, to address the fact that it's hampering the gameplan for upcoming games?

STEVE: That's a possibility, make sure the Wings suffer the same handicap that our network imposed upon him. But once again, the network is not the team. I talked with the head of the Dancougar FA earlier, and that's the stance he appears to be taking. He told me that he'll only accept a replay if mandated by the Oxen Cup officials, and that Land de Wood are welcome to come to Yuki City for a World Cup 42 friendly whenever they want. But as far as he's concerned, Wood's beef is with us and not him. And it's a handy excuse, whether it flies or not, because Dancougar is not exactly out of the woods, so to speak, either. Milchama tonight could make or break their chances to escape the first round. They'd rather get their focus on the game.

KENNETH: Steve Teebone, thanks for stopping by.

Jeruselem

18-07-2008, 02:31

Jeruselem Government News

Sister Marsha banishes Satan!

OK, that's not quite true. Jeruselem played DevilDogma at the Oxen Cup 7 today and Satan's team lost the game. Jeruselem playing for God and Jesus won 5-1 to prove those Satanists can't play football against a real team. The Satanists were also eliminated from the cup at the same time as well as Solenial who got beaten by the Purple Menace ... err World Champs.

Sister Marsha's team with God on their side proved the more determined team. Devildogma tried hard but the Satanists despite the usual dirty tricks failed to scare our team. Kate Sallad ran out dressed as a Nun to prove her faith but discard the habit when it came to playing football.

Remaining teams to play are Kose and the Turkomans (aka KT&T) and Green Wombat. Both Jeruselem and the World Champs are on track to progress with solid wins against their opponents so far. Both teams have 2-1-0 record and look like ones to beat in this group with only the Turks and coloured marsupials being any threat.

KT&T are not a telephone company team, it's Kose and the Turkomans.

Blouman Empire

18-07-2008, 03:34

FOOTBALL FEDERATION OF BLOUMANY

Press Release

We the Football Federation of Bloumany (FFB) wish to advise all interested parties that we will not be sending any official team to the 7th Oxen Cup. We are aware that this will come as a disappointment to many football fans especially the fans of the last FFB Cup Keith Street Enders.

This was caused by a serious communication error within the FFB which resulted in us preparing for the OXEN Cup a month to late. We wish to apologise to the Keith Street Enders football club and all of their supporters.

During this time it has come to our attention that a team in Qazox comprised of Blouman expatriates has imitated themselves as a Blouman Empire International team and has been playing under the Imperial flag and under FFB colours. The FFB does not support this team nor encourages these actions, however, we will not be seeking an explanation from them and we wish them the best of luck for their upcoming games against professional athletes.

Dancougar

18-07-2008, 05:18

Last time on "Better Know an RP Character," we met Russ and Peter, who have played action heroes, college idiots, and in their current incarnation, both sides of a supernatural whodunnit. You may wonder, dear readers, if Dancougar simply hasn't lost his mind (recent events suggest that is, indeed, the case) by casting them in whatever role happens to pop up. But as we found out, there is method to the madness, and it begins in Japan. Let's have a look.

The Kingdom of Dancougar's Omake Theater Presents
"Better Know an RP Character"

As long as there have been movies and programs about spies and action heroes, there have been movies and programs making fun of spies and action heroes. Some can live a well-adjusted normal life outside of work, others can't. Some are scatterbrained geniuses, and some are just plain idiots. Well, Russ and Peter have found a home somewhere in between... they're all right at what they do, and find themselves constantly having to respond to things that just aren't ordinary. And when they do, chaos ensues. Naturally, they bring the chaos with them even when the job is done.

Today, we have for them a special guest. Coming straight from the pages of Japanese light novels: Sagara Sousuke, an action hero who is an expert at all forms of combat, but fails in the most epic sense possible at civilian life. Today, we'll witness the meeting of these three, as all try to learn something from what should be a normal experience. Let's watch, shall we?

***

Sagara, Russ, and Peter met on the streets of Las Vitas and shook hands. Sagara was in his school uniform, but still had a hardened look about him. His hair was cut short, and his eyes were like steel. Contrast to Peter and Russ, who were in street clothes that hung loosely from their, oh, less developed frames. They shook hands.

"So..." said Russ, having appointed himself icebreaker for the day, "we're lucky to have with us, uh, Sousuke here. And he's going to teach us more about being a heroic character with hilarious personality flaws."

"The mission is clear," announced Sousuke. "We are to engage in cultural exchange activities commencing this evening. We will proceed as a unit to an entertainment center downtown, located at the provided coordinates, where my sources indicate that our targets have already infiltrated the civilian populace. We are to seek out and obtain the identification codes of female operatives in the building."

"Is this... like... a ground attack or something?" asked Peter, obviously not following.

"What Sousuke is trying to say," began Russ, "is that tonight, we're going to attempt to meet women at a bar and get their numbers." At least he thought that's what was happening. Nobody had bothered to tell him beforehand, but he knew from the introduction who they were dealing with.

"OH, so we're going to pick up chicks!" exclaimed Peter.

"I suppose... if an allied fighter is unable to withdraw safely from the battlefield, then by all means, we're to pick her up and get her out," responded Sousuke coolly. "We should, however, refrain from direct physical contact with our targets, which would blow our cover and direct reinforcements squarely our way."

"They can blow MY cover if they want," said Peter, jabbing Russ.

"Are you even listening to me?!" cried Sousuke.

They allocated two hours to drive to the club, which should have only been a half hour ride. As Sousuke explained, this was to avoid suspicion. If anyone was tailing them, it was best to mask their true destination. But of course, that only aroused suspicion when they went around the same block at least five times, at ten miles per hour. A policeman pulled up behind them. Sagara reached under the seat and extracted what appeared to be a smoke grenade, "For a quick getaway," he said simply.

"Let me handle this..." said Russ nervously, as the cop came up to the driver's side window. "Hey, officer... sorry if we caused a scare, but we're a little lost. You see, we're looking for this place, and the directions we got didn't give any reference points..."

After bumbling through the story, the policeman pointed out where they should go, and sent them on their way. "Fascinating!" murmured Sagara. "A clever ruse meant to disguise our true purpose, while at the same time leading us straight into the lion's den! I could learn something from you, Pauli."

"When do we bag the chicks?" asked Peter.

"It's not advised that we physically extract them, I already said that!" Sousuke replied.

Once at the club, they walked towards the entrance. This was ignoring, of course, the long line and velvet rope, the rope being the most essential feature of any good nightclub. That and the two ton guy standing on the other side of it. The behemoth stepped in their way as they approached the door. "Whoa whoa whoa, you guys can't..."

In a flash, Sousuke had performed a perfect judo takedown. Russ and Peter just backed away nervously as Sousuke stood over the downed bouncer, much to the surprise of the crowd. "Damn, I was careless! We need to regroup, switch to Plan B!" With that, he ran around the corner and disappeared.

The bouncer slowly got to his feet and brushed himself off. He threw Peter and Russ a dirty stare. "We'll... just go back there..." Russ said, heading to the line.

An hour later, they were in. Peter immediately went down to the dance floor and let the funk take over. Russ sat himself down at the bar and ordered a stiff drink. He had downed the first one in a gulp when his phone rang. He looked down at the name... he hadn't ever heard of this guy. But whatever. He flipped it open. "Hello?"

"Pauli, is that you?" It was Sousuke's voice. "Look towards the west wall... can you verify the location of a large box?"

Oh no... thought Russ. Sure enough, there was a large box sliding slowly along the wall out, presumably coming from the supply area out back. Sousuke must have come in through the alley. "Yeah... I see you."

"Don't let them know it's me!" Sousuke hissed, in a whisper. "It took everything I had to sneak in here. Where's Klingenschmidt?"

"Peter?" asked Russ, searching the dance floor in the middle of the room. "He's... uh... he's in the middle of some serious recon in the pit, there."

"All right, we should proceed to assist him," replied Sousuke. "There are a lot of women in there, and we don't know who's one of them."

"Oooooh... no can do," said Russ. "Somebody has to stay over here by the bar and... uh... keep an escape route open."

"Good thinking!" said Sousuke. "I'll report in five minutes. If I fail to make a call, get out!" He hung up.

"Riiiight... yo, bartender!" called Russ. "Another one! And stronger, please."

At the back wall, Sousuke continued to creep forward in his box, when he felt a foot against him. He looked out a little peephole he'd poked for himself and saw one of the burly staff standing over him. "Hey... how'd this get out here?" he said.

Sousuke gulped, and reached for his gun. He took out a silencer and screwed it on. It's a shame that I have to... he thought, when suddenly there was a commotion in the middle of the floor.

Out there, Peter was working his mojo and had quite a haul to show for it. He was just taking down another pretty girl's number when, one by one, all of the girls he had talked to over the course of the evening began to seriously fail at dancing. They were flailing, falling over, bumping into people, and causing a general ruckus. The man who was poised to take the Sousuke box back to the supply room was gone in a flash, running over to see what was wrong.

Sousuke stood straight up and tossed the box aside. "Klingenschmidt, you fool, get out of there!!"

Peter looked down at his little black book and realized some of the pages didn't match. "Oooooh crap, I DID bring the Suck Note!" he said quietly to himself. "I forgot, I pasted some pages in here and... oooo boy." It was getting more and more dangerous to be in the center of things.

"They've found you out!" cried Sousuke. "Abort the mission!" He reached for the smoke grenade on his belt.

At the bar, Russ was thinking how lovely it was that he couldn't clearly see or hear what was going on behind him.

The Qazox police were not going to be happy.

***

Next time on "Better Know an RP Character," we shine the spotlight on Professor Frederick von Steuben. Learn the truth behind his robot chickens and everything else that comes from being a crazy college professor.

Blouman Empire

18-07-2008, 05:20

THE EMPIRE TIMES

FFB SCREW UP
[Enders Furious

 

OOC:
If my MD1 opponent here didn't like it well... he can remember who's scorinating his potential knockout games. ;)

Didn't do me a damn lot of good anyway being quiet about it.
Nah I never saw it what with me not being able to get on the forums at all.

And I think my three posts explains enough in an IC manner for my OOC reasons.

EDIT: All right WTF bloody Jolt forums, I had a huge RP right there and it decides to screw up on me I am not happy I can tell you. while I would fix it up it took me an hour to write and since I am out I just can't be bothered. For anyone who may be interested in what it said it was just the paper saying how poor the FFB is how there will be a challenge to both the Chairmen of the board and CEO positions and how there is a bunch of Bloumans in Qazox who are playuing but they have lost all of their games and how the paper supports them for doing something the FFB couldn't.

Qazox

18-07-2008, 06:25

MATCHDAY FOUR SCORES aka Elimination day for most.
In case of tie for top spot atop group or for 2nd place, the following tiebreakers will apply: (H2H, GD, GS, coinflip)

(winners in BOLD, Draws in Italics)

GROUP A @ Henrí Savagé Stadium, New Recife, Capacity: 73,000
Qazox 1-0 Sorthern Northland
The Blouman Empire 3-2 West Zirconia
Newmanistan 4-2 Arrundeu

GROUP B @ Estadio Azul Flores, Iguana de Mia, Capacity: 71,000
Kose and the Turkomans 1-2 Jeruselem
Solenial 1-4 Green wombat
Devildogma 0-4 Starblaydia

GROUP C @ Toro Rojo Stadium, Las Vitas, Capacity: 70,000
Milchama 3-2 Dancougar (MATCH OF DAY)
Acapais 0-1 Land de Wood
Prux 0-0 kenavt

GROUP D @ Vogg War Memorial Stadium, Vogg City, Capacity: 69,594
Retired Tourists 1-2 Cafundeu
Lovisa 0-1 Yafor 2
New Zomboria 3-4 Nire and Nire

STANDINGS AFTER MD 4
(Eliminated teams in RED
Quarterfinalists in BLUE)

Group A W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Newmanistan 3-1-0 10 9 4 +5
Qazox 3-1-0 10 9 5 +4
S. Northland 1-1-2 4 5 4 +1
Arrundeu 1-1-2 4 7 11 -4
Blouman Empire 1-0-3 3 8 11 -3
West Zirconia 0-2-2 2 4 7 -3

Newmanistan is in 1st due to better GD.
Qazox clinches group with a win and either a Newmanistan loss or draw and if Qazox has better GD or GS (in case of both teams winning).

Newmanistan wins group with a win and either a Qazox loss or draw and if Newmanistan has better GD or GS (in case of both teams winning), or a draw and a Qazox draw.

Group B W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Starblaydia 3-1-0 10 12 3 +9
Jeruselem 3-1-0 10 12 4 +8
Green wombat 3-0-1 9 11 9 +2
K. & T. T. 2-0-2 6 8 6 +2
Solenial 0-0-4 0 3 13 -10
Devildogma 0-0-4 0 4 15 -11

Starblaydia is in 1st due to better GD.

Starblaydia clinches group with a win and either a Jeruselem loss or draw and if Starblaydia has better GD or GS (in case of both teams winning) or a draw and a Jeruselem draw. Clinches quarterfinal berth with either a win or draw.

Jeruselem wins group with a win and either a Starblaydia loss or draw and if Jeruselem has better GD or GS (in case of both teams winning). Clinches quarterfinal berth with either a win or draw.

Green wombat clinches group with a win and a Starblaydia loss or draw. Clinches quarterfinal berth with a win.

Group C W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Milchama 4-0-0 12 11 3 +8
Dancougar 2-1-1 7 8 6 +2
Prux 1-2-1 5 6 6 --
Land de Wood 1-1-2 4 3 7 -4
Acapais 1-0-3 3 5 8 -3
kenavt 0-2-2 2 1 4 -3

Milchama has clinched Group.
Land de Wood eliminated due to H2H loss to Dancougar.

Dancougar clinches quarterfinal berth with a win or Prux loss or draw or a draw and a Prux win in which Prux does not surpass Dancougar in GD.

Prux clinches quarterfinal berth with a win and a Dancougar loss or a Dancougar draw and a win in which Prux surpasses Dancougar in GD.

Group D W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Cafundeu 4-0-0 12 14 6 +8
Yafor 2 4-0-0 12 12 4 +8
Nire & Nire 2-0-2 6 11 11 --
Lovisa 1-0-3 3 2 8 -6
Retired Tourists 0-1-3 1 4 8 -4
New Zomboria 0-1-3 1 10 16 -6

Cafundeu in 1st on GS.

Cafundeu clinches group with win or draw (draw would keep Cafundeu ahead on GS).
Yafor 2 clinches group with win.

Land de Wood

18-07-2008, 09:07

Well after the controversal game against Dancougar it was back to service as normal against Acapais.
Acapais had only won one game going into this one while Land de Wood had just one draw to their name, and needed a win here to stand any remote chance of qualifying.

Land de Wood started lively enough with again some good running from Woodrow Derby down the left, but Gary Hoggins letting the team down twice failing to head the ball past the goalie in the first 10 minutes.
Acapais started to come back into this game and had their best chance in the 25th minute when their midfielder shot from the edge of the area but a spectacular save from Clemence kept them out.

Then just before the break, Whitemore got down the right hand side well, crossed it in and there was Hoggins to head them in front. Half time, 1-0 up and things are finally looking good for land de Wood.

In the second half Larry Derby marshalled the midfield well and Richard Butty made some important challenges. Ray Horse had the best chance when he broke from midfield but his shot from the edge of the area was well saved.

Acapais started to attack more but failed to find a way past our steely defence.

The game ends 1-0 and land de Wood celebrate their first victory.

But celebrations are cut short as news come in that despite this win and Dancougar's defeat the organisers are relying on H2H results to seperate the teams. So even if Land de Wood win their final game 9-0 they will crash out due to that defeat against Dancougar last time out even if they finish on level points.
Did the organisers give false hope to Land de Wood by not revealing to them that they were actually effectively out of the competition before this game began?
Well I'm sure the organisers have enough on their hands without having to work out every possible permutation for every group.

Hold on I've just been handing a piece of paper from one of our interns explaining how if we and Dancougar and another team all somehow finished on 7 points and we had beaten that team then we might possibly have qualified due to a 3 way split head to head victory. My brain's hurting just reading the maths involved in that one.

Newmanistan

18-07-2008, 10:19

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS CRUISE TO VICTORY

New Recife, Qazox- This was a game that the Empire was watching very closely, this tilt with Arrundeu. It was a game the Rockets should win on paper. But those matches have seemed to been the more difficult ones, for coach Brian Carson, anyway. When Brian Carson was handed the Cup of Harmony ultimatum it was because of his failure to win games against the low ranked teams that Newmanistan should be able to beat, and then have to play catch up against the stronger teams. Had the ultimatum not been reached, it was widely believed that Eric Andrews would be named the new head coach of the senior team’s world cup effort, based on his performance in Oxen Cup 6. The ultimatum is water on the bridge now, but the still this game had interest, because it was indeed one of those games. Eric Andrews, if he was ever going to be seen as a coaching option to follow Carson couldn’t get the same reputation. A loss to Arrundeu, then Andrews too, could be in the same light.

Arrundeu had picked up four points in their last two contests, so this was a team, whether their national leadership knew it or not, that actually had a shot at advancement if they were to pull off an upset of Newmanistan. Arrundeu tried to press for an early goal, and over the first five minutes, they forced Corey Hennis to have to make a couple of pretty solid saves. After that brief rush, though, Newmanistan took over, as if someone just turned a switch to the on position. The Rockets used their speed along the wings to spread out the opposing defense, as they seemed to have a hard time reacting to this, while attempting to center crossed in the box to McAllister or Drummond. In the 13th minute, this plan worked to put the first goal on the board. The Arrundeu defense had no answer for Alex Parnett in the midfield, and his perfect cross found Jeremy McAllister in just the right spot. Instead of shooting, Jeremy smoothly slid a pass over to Shawn Drummond. The keeper anticipated a J-Mac shot, and thus leaned too far to his right in order to regain his balance to get the shot by Drummond who saw him over commit to that side. Three minutes later, the score was quickly 2-nil, and pretty much the play started in much the same fashion. Again Parnett along the wing. Again a cross to the middle, but this time Kevin Lewis was the recipient of the pass, and as McAllister did before, Lewis faked a shot, and got the keeper to commit, before passing the ball over to Drummond for his second of the game. The Rockets nearly scored a third goal in the 21st minute with the same routine, but this time the pass from Parnett to McAllister was a bit too early and J-Mac was offsides. Eventually, Arrundeu realized they need to focus a little more on Parnett, and they did begin to contain him much better. The game remained 2-nil for quite a while until the second minute of stoppage time of the first half when the Rockets added goal number three, off the foot of a very unlikely scorer. Knowing that there were just going to be two minutes of stoppage time, the Rockets brought everyone but Tony Borsinger and Corey Hennis up on a corner kick. Kevin Carrigan delivered it well, and after a few bounces the ball ended up on the foot of defender Michael Harrison. Harrison took the shot and scored! His first ever international goal!

With the score 3-nil at the half, the Rockets were very comfortable with the way things were going, as you could expect. No reason to change things up, even after Arrundeu had a breakthrough in the 49th minute to make it 3-1. It was a case of a team that had very little possession to that point having a brief moment in the sun. No one on the Rockets seemed to concerned, but they seemed to be a little more physical after the goal. Obviously when the Rockets get like this, Brett Prescott is the one leading the way and he did just that. But even Kevin Carrigan and Jeremy McAllister joined in the fun, and the Arrundeu players, seemingly drained, seemed to want no part of it. The Rockets sensed that, so they kept coming at them, and soon you saw Arrundeu players constantly complaining for cards. Their complaints came answered in the 59th and 62nd minutes, but not the way they wanted too. Two of their players of were yellow carded for their carrying on with arguments. In the 76th minute, Arrundeu got more to be upset about, this being a 4th Newmanistan goal. The Rockets seemed to want to set up Alex Parnett for a goal, to reward him with his excellent play in the games first 20 minutes. This had gone on for quite a while, but they couldn’t quite find the desired result. At last they did, this time with Parnett rushing upfield himself and working a little give and go with Jeremy McAllister. Using Shawn Drummond as a decoy, McAllister found Parnett, and Alex blasted a shot by the keeper to make it 4-1. That would be enough to seal the win and the Rockets simply played out the remaining minutes. Arrundeu took advantage to score an 88th minute goal, but by then the game was long since over. The Rockets win the game 4-2. But not just any game. The Rockets defeat one of “those” opponents, one of the pesky ones that always seemed to a thorn in their side. The win clinches advancement. Whether or not they win the group or not is still unknown, but we’ll see what happens. West Zirconia is Newmanistan’s final group stage opponent.

Dancougar

18-07-2008, 14:56

SCOTTY: All right, we are almost positive that we have this one right. Milchama's roster announced before the tournament includes Borkers across the board. Borkers on the field, Borkers on the bench, and they claim it's all one guy. Okay. We checked the really long name newspaper, but no mention of a different lineup, so we can only assume that Bugsy Borker is, in fact, the starting lineup for Milchama. Now, you may ask, how hard can it be to beat one player? Violitism tried that before in World Cup qualification and was rightly trounced. But Milchama is a nation where outer appearances are almost guaranteed to hide quality. Said striker Kano Saito before the match, "We're not playing the banana... so we have a chance!!"

KENNETH: To Las Vitas we go, in what was tagged as the Match of the Day by tournament officials. Would it live up to the hype... the hype we didn't have, because we've spent most of the last few days dealing with the Kingdom's Office of Communications and Entertainment, who are threatening to cancel the program if we don't shape up?

SCOTTY: That's not part of the highlight.

KENNETH: Anyway, while we roll these, we're going to count down our list of theories as to how one man, Bugsy Borker, is so darn effective as Milchama's lone player. We'll lead off with Professor von Steuben's theory from yesterday, that each Borker you see on the field is actually one of his many quantum states, and Milchama has simply picked the ones who were best at playing football. Early on, check out the no-look pass from Borker to Borker on the left side, but the shot rolls into Vaccarino's waiting hands. You figure, with spooky action at a distance, the first Borker would know the state of the second, and without saying a word, know exactly where to place the pass. But this is out, since the uncertainty principle should state that Vaccarino couldn't know both the location and the speed of the Borker with the ball, but he tracked that play all the way.

SCOTTY: Now we're going to have the Bureau of Science and Technology on our ass; surely we got all that wrong.

KENNETH: Hey, if I was a physics major, I wouldn't be in broadcasting.

SCOTTY: Fifteenth minute, Team Borker puts one into the net with a great team effort... which is a solitary effort by definition of the Milchaman team, unless the truth is explained by theory number two! There are actually eleven physical Bugsy Borkers on the field, they're just Milchama's clone army! Nice passing in the run-up to the goal, with Borker finding Borker on the wing... shakes of Fey, crosses into the box, and Borker... header, near post, go~la~zo! Vaccarino thought Heckendorf had this one cleared, but a couple of Borkers crash the net and slip inside him for the shot. But after the goal, here's the weird thing... all the other Borkers we saw vanished, and there was only one of them standing on the other side of the field, smiling ear to ear while a confused Kano Saito kicked off to restart play. So this theory is out.

KENNETH: But the Wings get one back just minutes later, twenty second minute, when Culverhouse pulls a quick one-two with Kawaguchi. He's behind Borker, lines up the shot... and blasts it home, top shelf!! Culverhouse makes no mistake with this one and just powers it through the box, fifteen yards away, and we're all tied at one. Now, scary moment just before the half. Brittain tries to start a break and is fouled clumsily by Borker, and his knee seems to twist as he goes down. Foot caught in the turf. They'd pull him off the field, but not even the magic spray can help him; Jared Matthews would replace him at the start of the second half.

SCOTTY: Let's go to the second half, now, and pull up Borker theory number three. One guy with supreme martial arts. We've heard of techniques that allow one to create mirror images of themselves, which vary from ethereal copies to physical clones. And when we say "heard of," we mean "saw it in an anime last night." Borker would assess the threat of the play, or the strength of his own opportunity, and create the necessary number of mirrors. Hey, Kenneth, what kind of power level do you think he'd need to pull that off?

KENNETH: Oh, in the neighborhood of, uh, nine thousand, perhaps. Except he's... OVER NINE THOUSAND!!

SCOTTY: So is attendance. Borker wins the ball from Kawaguchi in the air and starts the counterattack. Pushes it wide to Borker. Borker, now, in what is certainly the driest commentary in the history of dry commentary... passes to Borker! Borker... look at the stepover, completely fakes out Ieyasu, and he'll five-hole Vaccarino to make it 2-1! And Vaccarino is mad with himself on this play, but you have to credit the superb ball movement of Bugsy Borker to set this up. No defender was able to get in a clean challenge, and the resulting shot was perfectly placed. We thought this theory would answer all the questions, until someone pointed out that he would totally exhaust his chi if he tried to do that for ninety minutes. What's more, he doesn't even announce the technique, and we all know that a technique's effectiveness is proportional for how long and loud one screams the name. So we're still asking quesitons.

KENNETH: But Borker provides the answer in minute sixty eight with an incredible goal, and once again, Dancougar cedes the long run! In his half, Borker... spins past Voronzoff and turns on the afterburners. No help with him, just one man against the defense. He weaves around Ieyasu, who stumbles trying to correct his course. On the edge of the box, he holds off a challenge from Fey. Vaccarino comes out to try and cut down the angle, but he pushes the ball past him, too, and SLIDES HOME FOR GOAL! Goodness me, Borker showing off all the quality that's gotten his team three wins from three matches, looking to make it four from four, and finally, I think we know how he does it. HE'S JUST BLOODY FAST. All the other Borkers we see are simply after-images of this guy. We are, in a word, unworthy.

SCOTTY: But the Wings would fight back and make this one exciting down the stretch. Minute seventy five, DuPont has switched out defender Ando Tomokazu for forward Glen Rotondo. And Rotondo's first touch is a real stinger, which Borker pushes wide but yields the corner. Kawaguchi to take it, and its curled in... headed up in the air by Fey, headed out by Borker, but it falls to the feet of Voronzoff, who cracks in another cross, and this time, it's a goal!! Culverhouse redirects it past Borker, and we've got ourselves a match, now, 3-2! Minute eighty one, Rotondo again causing trouble. He pushes into the box and fires a low shot at the far post... it skips across the goal and Hayashi slides in too late to poke it in, Milchama retain the lead. Borker tries to get them some breathing space, minute eighty six... long shot, twenty five yards out, that takes a nasty dip at the last minute and Vaccarino just manages to tip it over the bar!!

KENNETH: One last chance for the Wings, second minute of stoppage time, and it's a free kick. The box is packed. We see Borker flying all over the place, frantically trying to guess where it's coming... the service from Rotondo, and Borker guesses right!! Cleared away into safety, and the referee will end it... a 3-2 win for Milchama; they'll clinch Group C. Dancougar remain in second on seven points, two clear of Prux for the final quarterfinal spot.

SCOTTY: So Dancougar will have to do the business against the Hearts tomorrow night, with "do the business," of course, being a euphemism for "not suck." They can still qualify without a win, but that would require Land de Wood taking away points from Prux. It is Land de Wood versus Prux, right? In the other game? Oh GOD, let that be the correct schedule. The last thing I need is Andrew Wood marching in here to beat my face in for telling him the wrong guys to prepare for again.

KENNETH: Dancougar and Acapais close out group play against each other for the second Oxen Cup in a row. Last time around, Dancougar won a high-scoring affair, 4-3, to take the group. This time, the best they can hope for is second, but the quarterfinals are the quarterfinals no matter how you slice it. DuPont will be telling his team to just go out and win, but that's what he did at World Cup 41... we remember how THAT one turned out.

West Zirconia

18-07-2008, 16:25

West Zirconia's elimination from the Oxen Cup was confirmed with a thrilling 3-2 defeat to the Blouman Empire.

After a slow start, with both teams being a little over-cautious, the breakthrough came in the 17th minute, when Matthew Love volleyed in an Ian Hawthorne cross, leaving the Blouman keeper completely stranded. The Bloumans immediately went on the offensive, and were rewarded with two goals in the following eight minutes.

It was still 2-1 at half-time, leaving West Zirconia with a difficult, but by no means impossible task. They came out fighting in the second half, and on the hour Ed French scored from just outside the penalty area.

It was an equally balanced game from then on, and it was looking as if West Zirconia would secure their third draw in the competition when, three minutes from time, Glenn Charlton lunged at a Blouman forward in the penalty area, and was promptly sent off. The ensuing penalty left Steve Gray helpless, and the Bloumans held on for their first win.

West Zirconia------2-3------ The Blouman Empire
Love 17--------------------- A. Blouman 21, 25, 87(pen)
French 60

Booked: Paterson, McGowan (West Zirconia)
Sent off: Charlton (West Zirconia)

Attendance: 61,352

West Zirconia have one final game in which to restore some pride - however, as the game is against Newmanistan, who are currently unbeaten at the top of the table, this could be a task too far for Roy Hazell's team.

Cafundeu

18-07-2008, 16:56

GAZETA DO POVO - ALL YOU WANT TO KNOW IS HERE!
Sports Section - articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

The B National Team players are really working hard in order to attract the attention of the main NT coach Eduardo Bosschaart. Although the team didn't have real strong opposition until now, the players are doing their best in order to win the games. After the two wins in the first games against Lovisa and the team from Nire and Nire, the Cafundelenses continued to keep their good form and defeated the weaker teams of the group Retired Tourists and New Zomboria. But, although the three points came, the results of the games left the supporters a bit suspicious about the future of this team in the Oxen Cup, as it became clear that the team's performances were worse than in the first games.

The third game of the Oxen Cup for the Monopolists was against New Zomboria. Confident in winning the game, the coach Júlio Mercegues ordered the team to attack, and left the defence unprotected, which led to two New Zomboria goals in the first half of the first half. A mistake? Maybe, but Mercegues is a top coach, so he probably knew what he was doing... did he? Anyway, Cafundéu's ultra offensive approach continued, although the defence seemed more protected (these defenders will have problems in entering in Bosschaart's list). The reaction came: Marossi scored the first, Aristóteles the second, the third, the fourth and Fabinho the fifth, transforming what could be an embarassing loss in a nice win. New Zomboria had time to score the third goal, which made the supporters a bit disappointed, but the win came.

The fourth game was against the Retired Tourists. The name already said that the Cafundelenses had to win this game, as they are professional footballers, playing against tourists... what's more, people that even can't do tourism anymore, so they are retired! They surely don't have the physical training necessary to play a full game, they must be approaching their deaths. Another lesson to not underestimate the opponents. Although Cafundéu easily took the lead with two goals still in the first half (both scored by Fausto), the tourists stopped Cafundéu from scoring more goals, with a good defensive strategy. In a counterattack, they were even able to score once, with one of the players hitting the ball with the can he was using to stand up. Later, this same player used the can to hit the head of João Carlos, and was sent off. But the game ended just 2-1 to Cafundéu.

Land de Wood

18-07-2008, 18:32

Well with all the recent going ons, we've managed to get an early interview with Andrew Wood.

Larry: Good afternoon Andrew,
Andrew: Good afternoon Larry, good as always to speak to you.
Larry: Well you've got to be pleased with that result.
Andrew: Indeed it is nice with everything else that's been going on t get our first win under our belt.
Larry: Gary Hoggins got the winner but could have had a few more, are you disappointed not to win by more than one goal.
Andrew: Well yes of course it would have been nice to win by more but a win is a win.
Larry: Indeed, so what is the situation between you and Dancougar now?
Andrew: Well I have received a reply to a telegram I sent them late last night, they have expressed their regret about Dancougar Sports Centre's inaccurate reporting and have assured me that the Sports Centre is completely independent. They have also assured me that the Sports Centre will be reminded of the need to accurately report incidents. Also they took the time to assure me that while refereeing decisions may have gone against us, there is no question of any match fixing going on.
Larry: Are you happy with that response?
Andrew: Well I'm satisfied at least.
Larry: Do you think that all of this had any detrimental effect on your team?
Andrew: No, infact the opposite. It is well known in footballing circles that a siege mentality can improve performance and I have no doubt that, that helped us in this game, and my boys performed brilliantly as a reuslt.
Larry: So was some of this a deliberate tactic?
Andrew: Well lets just say it can sometimes help to take advantage of circumstances.
Larry: I see, well any news on the line up for the final game?
Andrew: Well we are going to make a few changes now that we are out of the competition, our younger players are flying of to link up with the Di Bradini squad although they won't quite make the first game there. I will also take the opportunity to try out one or two fringe players in preparation for the Baptism of Fire.
Larry: Thank you Andrew, good as always to speak to you.
Andrew: No problem have a good evening.

So there you have it, Andrew may well have stoked the flames a bit to encourage a siege mentality for his team and it paid dividends as they won their first game. Be interesting to see how they line up for their final game, we have that line up for you later tonight.

Land de Wood

18-07-2008, 23:39

Well this will be the final line up Andrew Wood will be naming in the Oxen Cup as what ever the result they will be out of the tournament. so it will be a chance to see some of the fringe players. All the u-21 starlets have left for the Di Bradini Cup so it will be interesting to see how Andrew Wood lines up.

Larry: Good evening Andrew.
Andrew: Good evening, Larry
Larry: So sadly this is our final game, it has certainly been an eventful time.
Andrew: Indeed it has, and I would like to take this opportunity to thank the organisers for all the hard work they have put in, and should we be invited back next time, we would be delighted to take part.
Larry: So is this a chance to find out who you should have picked from the start?
Andrew: Well that's one way of putting it, it will certainly give the rest of the squad who haven't played yet, apart from the u-21's, a chance to shine.
Larry: So which reserve goalie have you gone for.
Andrew: Well we've got to start looking to the next tournament and also protect ourselves in case Clemence ever got injured so I'm choosing 30year old Jonathon Horse ahead of 34 year old Gary Nicol.
Larry: What about in defence?
Andrew: David Aimer stays at right back, Stephen Diddon replaces Richard Wilson in the middle of the park, where Gary Lewis is back from suspension while Stephen Sterland moves out to left back.
Larry: Interesting I guess you want to see how Sterland manages at left back, and of course Aimer's understudy has linked up with the u-21's. So what about midfield?
Andrew: Richard Butty stays in front of the back four, but then on the left wing we have Gary Stering, Gary Workhorse in the centre and Aaran Whitemore out wide right.
Larry: And finally in attack?
Andrew: David Clemence playing behind Steve Eclair who really needs to play well to keep his place in the side.
Larry: Indeed Steve Eclair hasn't really impressed, is this the end of his short international career.
Andrew: No he hasn't impressed but let's see how he does in this game before we cut short his international career.
Larry: Thank you Andrew for that interesting line up.
Andrew: No problem, good night.
Larry: Good night.

So here's the team:
Formation: 4-1-3-1-1, Style: attackive (+1)
Lineup:
Jonathon Horse
David Aimer Stephen Diddon Gary Lewis Stephen Sterland
Richard Butty
Aaron Whitmore Gary Workhorse Gary Sterling
David Clemence
Steve Eclair

Qazox

19-07-2008, 00:25

...
Hold on I've just been handing a piece of paper from one of our interns explaining how if we and Dancougar and another team all somehow finished on 7 points and we had beaten that team then we might possibly have qualified due to a 3 way split head to head victory. My brain's hurting just reading the maths involved in that one.

(ooc: Yes technically you could, but there is no way Dancougar, Prux and Land de Wood can finish level on points, so that is why you are eliminated.)
(ooc2: Dancougar, Groups A & C have the same schedule, while groups B & D have the same. hope that cleared it up for you a bit.)

Green wombat

19-07-2008, 00:44

A dominating 4-1 win over Solenial, sees the Wombats within striking distance of a quarterfinal berth. A hat trick from Norris Menotti in the first half, scoring in the 11th, 34th and 40th minute gave the team a 3-0 lead entering the half. A solenial goal in the 52nd made it 3-1, but Adolph Keipe made it 4-1 in the 66th, finishing the scoring.

Up next is Jeruselem, who only need to draw with us to advance, and clinch a quarterfinal spot for Starblaydia in the process. a win and only a win can send the team through. Can the Wombats get one of their biggest wins in team history? Or will they just be the best 3rd place team?

Land de Wood

19-07-2008, 01:02

(ooc: Yes technically you could, but there is no way Dancougar, Prux and Land de Wood can finish level on points, so that is why you are eliminated.)
(ooc2: Dancougar, Groups A & C have the same schedule, while groups B & D have the same. hope that cleared it up for you a bit.)

OOC: Sorry my comment was meant to be in the past tense, i.e. you didn't eliminate us before the Acapais game, because the 3 way split was still possible but you did eliminate us after the Acapais game because of the Prux result.

Dancougar

19-07-2008, 03:30

(ooc2: Dancougar, Groups A & C have the same schedule, while groups B & D have the same. hope that cleared it up for you a bit.)

OOC: I know, I know, I can't read numbers. Augh.

Now then, with one game remaining the group stages, we can't be sure if Dancougar will live to see another matchday. Plenty can happen between them and Acapais, Prux and Land de Wood. But we'll stick to our character schedule and hope we get one more... and if we don't, well, Oxen Cup 8 will be likewise spammed with our nonsense!

The University of Helmut is where we first met Professor Frederick von Steuben, who isn't exactly a mad scientist. But then again, nor is he a completely sane academic. Von Steuben has been published in many journals for such notable research topics as Chicken Sacrifice and its Correlation to Success in Football Matches and Case Study on Why You'll Never Get a PhD - I'm Disproved Your Thesis in 1976.

The Kingdom of Dancougar's Omake Theater Presents
"Better Know an RP Character"

Von Steuben walks into our booth wearing a white lab coat and his reading spectacles. What exactly he needs them for, we're not entirely sure. Perhaps he just wants to look snappy for his interview. "How are you doink?" he asks in his unmistakable accent. "I am Professhor Frrrr~rrederick von Schtoiben, und I heff a PhD een vatever eet mecks sense depending on ze schtory." He reaches into his pocket and takes out what looks to be a wallet, but is instead a catalog of his diplomas in the form of dozens upon dozens of business cards. It's a veritable academic Pokedex, and he's bloody caught them all.

We ask him about his blatant misuse of Russ and Peter to do work for him over the years, despite his having a steady diet of lab techs and graduate students he could enslave instead. "Vell, ze boys vere like me ven I vas zere edge," he says, remembering. "Joost es I can be counted on to heff ze knowledge een almost anysing, so can zey. Iffen I need programmers for ze robot cheekins, or somevon to get ze dry cleanink, or somevon to analyze sirty meenutes of veedo frem by frem... who else can I go to?"

When we return, more with the professor. First, a word from our sponsors:

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DSPN presents LOL-center, a full hour of gaffes from their past ten years of broadcasting. Share the laughs, relive the controversies... hosted by Kenneth Prime, this is one show you don't want to miss. So get to your TV however you can. Strap on your lollerskates, or hop into your roflcoptor, because this is the show that makes sure that old jokes don't ever ever die. LOL-center, this Sunday at 8, only on DSPN!

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Aaaand we're back. We now turn to some of the professor's more bizarre inventions. The football-playing chickens, for instance. "Ah, yah, zose vere because zat Gearlosse created ze ducklinks, und ze vorld cannot be bick enough for ze two crazy German scienteests, yah?" And then there's the power armor you developed for Russ and Peter during the Turtle Cup, which augments their football abilities to the point where even they can compete against regular internationals. They look like something straight out of Dragonball Z... of course, that's because they are. "Zat ees true, boot my experience ees zat ze bick hair und ze strenge personalities meld vell vis ze rest of ze football vorld."

Professor Frederick von Steuben - sixty seven years young, a hundred and forty two pounds, five foot eight. You're still kicking, although there's one thing we've been meaning to ask. There's an Erica von Steuben playing for Qazox right now... she says she's not related, and that's the official word out of the Qazox camp, as well. She does look a TINY bit like you, but we're wondering... "Ah... vell, I don't remember ever comink to Qazox aside from ze last Oxen Coop, but iffen I deet... her musser must heff been a hot von! So goot for me!"

The world needs dreamers like you, professor, so don't stop doing what you do best! We'll see you next time on "Better Know an RP Character," whether it's in this Oxen Cup or the next...

Qazox

19-07-2008, 05:36

MATCHDAY FOUR SCORES aka END of Opening Round.
In case of tie for top spot atop group or for 2nd place, the following tiebreakers will apply: (H2H, GD, GS, coinflip)

(winners in BOLD, Draws in Italics)

GROUP A @ Henrí Savagé Stadium, New Recife, Capacity: 73,000
Qazox 4-2 Arrundeu
The Blouman Empire 1-2 Sorthern Northland
Newmanistan 2-0 West Zirconia

GROUP B @ Estadio Azul Flores, Iguana de Mia, Capacity: 71,000
Jeruselem 1-1 Green wombat
Starblaydia 1-0 Kose and The Turkomans
Devildogma 1-3 Solenial

GROUP C @ Toro Rojo Stadium, Las Vitas, Capacity: 70,000
Milchama 2-2 kenavt
Acapais 1-3 Dancougar
Prux 3-0 Land de Wood

GROUP D @ Vogg War Memorial Stadium, Vogg City, Capacity: 69,594
Cafundeu 2-1 Yafor 2 (MATCH OF THE DAY)
Nire and Nire 4-2 Retired Tourists
New Zomboria 1-3 Lovisa

STANDINGS AFTER MD 4
(Eliminated teams in RED
Quarterfinalists in BLUE)

Group A W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Newmanistan 4-1-0 13 11 4 +7
Qazox 4-1-0 13 13 7 +6
S. Northland 2-1-2 7 7 5 +2
Arrundeu 1-1-3 4 9 15 -6
Blouman Empire 1-0-4 3 9 13 -4
West Zirconia 0-2-3 2 4 9 -5

Newmanistan wins Group on GD (+7 to +6)

Group B W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Starblaydia 4-1-0 13 13 3 +10
Jeruselem 3-2-0 11 13 5 +8
Green wombat 3-1-1 10 12 10 +2
K. & T. T. 2-0-3 6 8 7 +1
Solenial 1-0-4 3 6 14 -8
Devildogma 0-0-5 0 5 18 -13

Group C W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Milchama 4-1-0 13 13 5 +8
Dancougar 3-1-1 10 11 7 +4
Prux 2-2-1 8 9 6 +3
Land de Wood 1-1-3 4 3 10 -7
Acapais 1-0-4 3 6 11 -5
kenavt 0-3-2 3 3 6 -3

Acapais ahead of kenavt on H2H win.

Group D W-D-L Pts GF GA GD
Cafundeu 5-0-0 15 15 6 +9
Yafor 2 4-0-1 12 12 5 +7
Nire & Nire 3-0-2 9 15 13 +2
Lovisa 2-0-3 6 5 9 -4
Retired Tourists 0-1-4 1 6 12 -6
New Zomboria 0-1-4 1 11 19 -8

Retired Tourists in 4th on better GD (-6 to -8)

KNOCKOUT BRACKET

QUARTERFINALS
QF1- Newmanistan v Yafor 2 @ Estadia Pika, Pika City, Capacity: 78,625
QF2- Milchama v Jeruselem @ Lorax Field, Lorax City, Capacity: 76,500
QF3- Starblaydia v Dancougar @ Lorax Field, Lorax City, Capacity: 76,500
QF4- Cafundeu v Qazox @ Estadia Pika, Pika City, Capacity: 78,625

SEMIFINALS @ SaxerDome, SaxerVilla, Capacity: 85,000.
SF1- QF1 winner v QF2 winner
SF2- QF3 winner v QF4 Winner

3rd Place match- @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.
Semifinal losers

CHAMPIONSHIP- @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.
Semifinal winners

(ooc: These are WORLD CUP Quality QUARTERFINALS here, folks!)

Dancougar

19-07-2008, 06:28

KENNETH: Prux and Dancougar go into matchday five both alive for the final quarterfinal spot in Group C, and both know they need to win to make it happen - Prux to avoid being eliminated outright, and Dancougar to stay in control of their destiny. So once more to Las Vitas, and the Wings were looking to rebound from that tough 3-2 loss to Milchama. Early minutes, they get the first crack at goal. Culverhouse, two goals in the loss, tries to pick up his fourth of the tournament here, but his shot takes a deflection out of play. Minute eleven, look at defender Chad Fey make the overlapping run! The cross, and Hayashi's header is caught by the 'keeper! Midfielder Aaron Sundling, starting in place of the injured Gus Brittain, also causing some problems. Minute nineteen, fires a pass into the eighteen for Culverhouse, but he leads him too much, and it's scooped up.

SCOTTY: Acapais looked very shaky at the beginning of this game, but Dancougar was unable to take advantage until minute twenty seven. Sundling wins the ball in the midfield and finds Hayashi, who brings it up and chips it over the top for Kano Saito! And Saito flicks it into the back of the net, outside of the foot, and it's 1-0. Absolutely beautiful lobbed pass which Saito gets to first, and he pokes it past the oncoming goalie. Minute thirty three, the Wings get another. This time, Kawaguchi collects the ball at the top of the box and finds a shooting lane... and it goes in! The 'keeper was screened and didn't see the ball until it was too late, and the high shot makes it 2-0.

KENNETH: Second half, and the Hearts finally start to get back into this. Vaccarino makes only his second save here in minute fifty two, a low effort that squirts through the defense. But the Wings continue to attack. Saito... deflected out. Here's a cross by Voronzoff that Culverhouse mistimes. Lots of chances, but none of them were getting put away. And that's the funny thing about football. You can control a game for an hour, and lose it in an instant... Acapais counterattack! One pass, two pass... behind Ieyasu, and Vaccarino gives up the far post! Minute sixty two, the Hearts string together their first real structured attack of the game, and it ends up in the back of the net. It's 2-1, a whole new ballgame!

SCOTTY: But rather than seize the momentum, Charles DuPont steals it back by bringing on Eisenbach for Heckendorf, making it a 3-5-2 formation, and he decides that the best way to defend the lead is to throw everything up to build on it. The extra man helps Dancougar dominate the midfield and keep Acapais from any lightning counterattacks, and in the seventy fourth minute, Dancougar put this game to bed. Culverhouse chases down a deep ball and backheels to Voronzoff, who squares it for Ando Tomokazu! And it's the defender meeting this ball twenty two yards out, and he thumps that one into the back of the net! A laser! Dancougar nearly make it four in the eighty eighth, but Culverhouse is just a few paces offside. But the three points do the trick! Wings win 3-1, and they'll advance over Prux, whose 3-0 win would have carried them through if Dancougar had drawn or lost.

KENNETH: The quarterfinal draw is set, and it looks to be a monster of a bracket. At first glance, no team has an easy path to the final, although the Wings will face a stiff test against Starblaydia. World Cup champions. Atlantian Oceania champions. Unbeaten in group play with a plus ten... it's safe to say that the Black Wings will be underdogs in their quarterfinal clash.

Milchama

19-07-2008, 06:35

"Brilliant"

"What?"

"Just brilliant, no other word to describe it"

"Describe what?"

"The greatness, the excellence, the grace, just about everything about him. He's been brilliant"

"GODDAMN IT! WHO ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?! AND CAN YOU PLEASE BE MORE DESCRIPTIVE!!!!!!!!!?"

"Sure. Bugsy Borker has been brilliant for Milchama in us going 4-0-0 in the Oxen Cup so far."

"That's great. I don't understand how he is doing it"

"It looks like superhuman speed. That's what Dancougarian TV reported anyway."

"And when's the last time we trusted Dancourgarian TV?"

"Well when's the last time we watched Dancougarian TV?"

"Never."

"Ok so when could be the last time we listened to them?"

"Never"

"Exactly."

"So why do we trust them?"

"Do we have any better theories for how we keep winning?"

"Good point"

"Hmmm..."

"Exactly, so let's trust these folks from Dancougar"

"Fine."

"There"

"Ha!"

"Hiya!"

"Cheese!"

"Come on you Warriors!"

"Yeh that too"

"COME ON YOU WARRIORS!"

Newmanistan

19-07-2008, 09:42

THE ROCKET REPORT

KUSLER EARNS CLEAN SHEET AS HENNIS RESTS

New Recife, Qazox- With nothing to play for besides pride, and having confidence against a team that appeared to be a weaker opponent, Rockets manager Eric Andrews decided to change things up, to give his key players a rest for the quarterfinal, and to give some people who have yet to see any game action some playing time today. True, Group A was still up for grabs, but the Rockets would be in regardless, and that was the important thing to Eric. The biggest move, was the netminder, where Chris Kusler made his interregional debut as regular starting goalkeeper Corey Hennis got some rest on the sideline. Also starting were the four listed reserves: Nate Stratton, Shane Classen, Steve Boland and John Murphy. Regular substitutes Julie McElroy and Chris Peterson also started. The flip side meant that regular subs Eddie Chapman and Mark McCafferty stayed that way. Hennis was a sub, as was Alex Parnett and Jeremy McAllister. Kevin Lewis, Shawn Drummond, Kevin Carrigan, and Jeremy Brooker had the day completely off as reserves.

The changes created a different kind of enthusiasm on the Newmanistan sideline. None of the starters getting the day off had sour grapes, and in fact Jeremy Brooker stated that it was, “Nice to see everyone else getting a chance to play. They have worked hard in training, and deserved this moment.” The lineup changes probably came as quite a surprise to West Zirconia, who likely came in with their plan to stop phenoms McAllister and Drummond, and viewed much game tape on how they felt they could get a ball by Corey Hennis. McAllister was the biggest cheerleader on the sideline for the new keeper Chris Kusler, given that they are teammates with the Putnam Lake Eagles. McAllister has been the poster child for Putnam Lake football, and he was really excited to get to see another Eagle get to appear centerstage like this. Immediately Kusler was on top form, stopping a shot from point blank range by Steve Griffiths in the 8th minute, and then another quality chance in the 14th minute off the foot of Ian Hawthorne. Newmanistan began playing the game quite conservatively, but around the 20th minute of the contest, the Rockets took over. From that point, to the end of the half, statisticians tell us that the Empire held a 68-32 possession advantage. The pressure was rewarded with good chances, but in West Zirconia goalkeeper, Steve Gray, also looked very sharp at the beginning of the contest. He also was a bit lucky, as in the 30th minute Julie McElroy rang one of the post, and in the 36th minute, Steve Boland whistled a shot no more then an inch over the crossbar that Gray would not have been in position for. The goal was inevitable though, and in the 40th minute, Newmanistan would find the back of the net. It would be Boland, getting his first interregional goal of his career after Julie McElroy found him with a nice pass just outside the box. Boland to a few steps in before firing the shot, which was perfectly placed in the top left corner to give the Rockets a 1-nil lead. The lead held up until halftime.

During the intermission, the Rockets locker room was in quite a jovial mood. The regulars were thrilled to see the others having a great game, and especially for Boland, who’s been a reserve on just about every Newmanistanian team since World Cup 40 qualifying. Boland had eight caps to this point, but they were all as a late game substitute. In his first game getting a chance to start, he had a goal to his name. Coach Andrews was aware that West Zirconia was a little confused by the complexion of the Rockets lineup, because the switches that were made had it be a much more speedy lineup and a much less physical lineup. However, they should probably be glad they didn’t see Brett Prescott in this contest. Chris Kusler was there when he needed to be, and the team wanted to get the win first and foremost, for him.

West Zirconia was able to make some pretty good adjustments in the second half as coach Roy Hazell has a better feel for what he was going to face, and it showed in the play of his team. Play was much more even in throughout the second half, but still Hazell’s team could not penetrate the Newmanistan defense with much consistency. When they did, Chris Kusler, was a step ahead of the shooter at all times, reading the plays very well and made the saves he came down with look very easy. In the 68th minute, Newmanistan got some much needed breathing room. They were careful to protect the lead, but wanted the second goal pretty badly. Instead of forcing it, they waited until the time was right, and here it was. Chris Peterson made the play happen in midfield by out sprinting Anthony McGowan, and got the ball to Julie McElroy with a perfectly placed cross. Julie leaped up, and airmailed the header into the top left corner, the same spot Boland had scored in earlier, to put the Rockets up 2-nil. It was Julie’s first interregional goal since well, Oxen Cup 6. In fact, five of her now six interregional goals have been Oxen Cup goals. The goal deflated West Zirconia somewhat, but they still tried to play with pride. Between minutes 76-83, coach Andrews substituted Chapman, McCafferty, and McAllister into the lineup. Perhaps, it was just for a workout, but they closed out the deal, sending the Rockets to a 2-nil win.

Newmanistan finishes play in Group A with a record of 4-1-0, with three of those four wins being clean sheets. Chris Kusler is honored to have been part of that, but make no mistake, Corey Hennis will be back in goal before the Rockets when they head out to Pika City for their quarterfinal showdown with Yafor 2.

Newmanistan

19-07-2008, 10:04

EMPRESS: MILCHAMA LINEUP ILLEGAL

The possibility of a Newmanistan-Milchama semifinal, obviously pending the results of the quarterfinals, has prompted Empress Jessica, who is also the head of the Newmanistanian Football Association to issue a statement that she feels the lineup used by Milchama is an illegal lineup. With the Warriors in another group, the Empress didn’t feel the need to make a statement about it then, and thought that “someone like Dancougar” would say something. (But then again, we don’t know what’s up with the Dancougar media these days). Whether the Empress’ intentions are to seriously have action taken against Milchama, or to simply try to get in the head of the superhuman Bugsy Borker, and perhaps Milchama in general, remains to be seen. Milchama, as I’m sure we don’t really have to remind you, is the nation that defeated Newmanistan in the Oxen Cup 6 final.

Here is the statement made by the Empress:
“Milchama has been playing in the Oxen Cup with a lineup of only one person. There are no substitutes, no nothing. This is not about the superhuman talents of Bugsy Borker. Bugsy is an amazing talent and would look forward to taking him on. However, there is something we need to remember, and that is that Borker is allowed to basically do anything he wants out there. Referees are afraid to card him, because there is no other option for Milchama should Borker be given a red, and the refs do not want to, say, issue that card, give the opponent a forfeit victory and leave all the paying customers in the stands pissed off, protesting, perhaps burning things, and demanding their money back. And of course, no referee wants to decide a game so blatantly like that. This problem will only get worse as Milchama advances in the knockout stages. What we have seen is Borker run wild out there, be as rough as he wants with the opposition, and he still hasn’t received a single card. In contrast, when an opponent does no more then breath on Borker the wrong way, they get carded, because the referees are doing everything they can to make sure Borker doesn’t get hurt. In our opinion, they should be made to forfeit their wins.”

The Empress did say though, that should no action be taken, and the teams did meet in the semifinal, that the Rockets would approach the game “as normal”. She also said that the team is not looking past Yafor 2, and if Yafor 2 were to win, the same problems would take place in a match between them and Milchama.

Things would be a lot easier if Jeruselem defeated them, after all.

Jeruselem

19-07-2008, 10:27

Jeruselem coach Sister Marsha was sitting down staring at nothing ... she didn't seem to be actually watching the game. Once in a while she look at Lady Dazzarina Handiskya Dallas who was jumping around waving orders at Jeruselem players on the field. Being idle was not a Dallas trait. Sister Marsha was a bit in "lala" land. Jacinta Sallad was on the bench after being replaced with a striker. While she was a bit stupid, she observed others very carefully. She thought something was wrong.

Jacinta: Hey Sister! Wake up.
Marsha: Oh! Sorry ... I was in fairyland.
Jacinta: What's wrong?
Marsha: Nothing ...

Jacinta: I maybe stupid but I know when something is wrong.
Marsha: OK, it's my mother's birthday today.
Jacinta: So you miss her still.
Marsha: Yes, it makes one sad. She was a good mother.

Jacinta: So, why are you looking at Dazza?
Marsha: Because she looks like Mum ...
Jacinta: What do you mean?
Marsha: My mother was an active woman. She was always running around, doing stuff. She also liked to talk a lot.

Jacinta: Sounds like Dazza!
Marsha: That's why I respect Dazza. She maybe the world's biggest whore but she has the same mothering approach.
Jacinta: Well, go on.
Marsha: She'd sit you down and talk about stuff you want to ask. She'd give you an honest answer too.

Jacinta: Dazza's good for that. Players get depressed about stuff but a chat to the Bike and they're alright again. She's like the resident Mum for the team.
Marsha: She seems to know a lot.
Jacinta: She's been everywhere and done everything! Err, and every guy ...
Marsha: So, what about your plans?

Jacinta: Just had my holiday. Saving up for my kids! Us Sallad girls don't have a lot of money compared to Dallas girls.
Marsha: Well, I'll never have kids.
Jacinta: I'll bring around my littlies for you.
Marsha: No need, I chose a different lifestyle. Coss is Jewish and you're Catholic. What faith are kids going to be?

Jacinta: The boys will be raised Jewish and girls raised Catholic.
Dazza: Someone say kids?
Jacinta: Not yet!
Marsha: I'm not having kids ...

Dazza: I overheard what you two were talking about.
Marsha: Everyone needs a Mum once in while, even if they aren't the real mother.
Dazza: If you can't talk to another Nun, Dazza is here.
Marsha: Thanks Dazza.

Jacinta: My sis just scored!
Dazza: Ah, mother Maggie is on our side today.
Marsha: Yes, that's always a help.
Jacinta: Coss is always giving Kate a helping hand (giggles)

<Later>

Dazza: We're playing the Jewbees again!
Marsha: I thought we were the Jewbees?
Dazza: They are the Maggie loving Jewbees ... we aren't.
Marsha: What are we then?

Dazza: We're sex loving Jewbees ...

Land de Wood

19-07-2008, 11:28

And so with nothing to play for but pride our team took to the field. Actually some of the players did have more to play for as thy were trying to steal a place in the first team for the forthcoming Baptism of Fire.

However, the match against Prux was never going to be an easy one. While we haven't heard much from Prux' media this tournament (which I suppose is still better than those folks from Dancougar Sports Centre) they are former Baptism of Fire champions. Also Prux still had an outside chance of qualifying they beat us and Dancougar lost.

So our slightly weakened side took to the field anxious to show that they could win more than just one game.
Just five minutes into the game Prux left winger gets past Aimer and puts the cross in for their striker to head home. 1-0 and not a good start for our boys.
Our boys try to steady the ship and get some nice passing going only for Prux to win a free kick on the edge of the area in the 15th minute and their set piece specialist to score. 2-0 and just 15 minutes gone, are we in for a cricket score?
Andrew Wood seems to be telling our boys to play more solid and for the rest of the half that seems to do the trick as we go in 2-0 at half time, but with no real scoring attempts in that first half.
In the second half Andrew takes a risk bringing on Gary Hoggins and taking of Butty in the hope of getting back into this game. The switch to a more attackive formation seems to do the trick as Prux are kept in their own half for the next half an hour but still there seems no way past their goalie who pulls off a couple of top class saves.
Then on the counter Prux break through in the 75th minute, a good play through the middle of the park, sets their other striker up and he scores a lovely goal making it 3-0.
Our boys go in search of a consolation goal but fail to get one as the game ends 3-0.
Well it was always going to be tough in our first international match so we can be pleased we got the 4 points we did and finishing 4th in our group out of 6 is no mean feet.

Milchama

19-07-2008, 17:34

Chi Sun-Times-Tribune-Domestic-International-Star-News-Today-Picayune

Sports Section

Ref proves Newmanistan Wrong

In a report released slightly before MD 4 the Newmanistan Empress declared Milchama's lineup of one man, Bugsy Borker, illegal because of the pressure Borker put on referees not to yellow or red card him or else Milchama would lose. That theory however was proven wrong by today's match where Borker was indeed yellow and then red carded in a 2-2 draw with kenavt. Coach Barry Borker said, "Sometimes these things happen in football. To have Bugsy red carded is very unfortunate, luckily he doesn't have to serve a suspension because of the odd nature of the team and the fact that because the left back got suspended doesn't mean that every other position would get suspended. And luckily it was still a draw."

The game was looking good for Milchama until the red card. Borker was firing from all angles and was running rip shod around Kenavt time and time again. He scored the first goal off a 1-2 where he beat the defender before passing to himself (he was onside of course) and beat the last defender before chipping over the goalie for a 1-0 lead. This whole scene happened in the 35th minute. Shortly after though Borker was given a yellow card after a hideous late tackle on Cheese before he could start a breakaway that looked likely to score a goal. The score at halftime was 1-0 Milchama.

The second half started much in the same vain as most of the first half with Milchama dominating possession and trying to break through a tough kenavt defense. Still up 1-0 and dominating possession a breakthrough looked inevitable and it came in the form of Bugsy Borker in the 53rd minute. Borker lashed onto a good through ball by Borker to beat XY on the wing before crossing in the middle to a hustling Bugsy Borker who headed the ball into the back of the net for a 2-0 lead. Milchama then decided to play a little more defensively playing the ball between defenders and occasionally the midfield looking for a long ball to set loose the strikers. Unfortunately the strikers movement was poor and couldn't really get their hands on the ball. Milchama did try to get a third in the 65th when Borker launched a long through ball for Borker. But the ball was intercepted by Q who pushed the ball the XY who fed it to Cheese who finally found Sock who was viciously pulled down from behind. That left the ref no choice but to yellow card Borker who was sent off. With 24 minutes still to play it looked like a real kenavt victory was on the books. Their first goal came courtesy of Sock in the 67th minute when he skirted past a non-existent defense and scored to make it 2-1. Then the horror came. While trying to execute a pass XY missed Cheese causing the ball to go out of bounds and a throw in to Milchama. Unfortunately no one on Milchama could actually take the throw in so that led to 10 minutes of trying to figure out what would happen. Finally it was decided that the coach could kick the ball in to the field. Which he did, and Barry Borker kicked it so well it went out for a corner kick. 5 more minutes of figuring out what to do later. Borker was again summoned to kick the ball. Another corner, 5 more minutes, and another Borker kick. This time it didn't go out for a corner as XY passed up to a running Cheese who was declared off side because he was over the halfway line. The free kick took only 3 minutes to decide what would happen and Borker finally took it in the 88th minute. His kick was intercepted by XY who then passed to Cheese who was onside this time and he ran past the entire the defense to score a second goal to make it 2-2. With that second goal the referee called time so that the game would end before a true farce of football took place giving an unsatisfactory draw on both ends.

Final Score:
Milchama 2 (Borker 31, 53)
kenavt 2 (Sock 67, Cheese 89)

Dancougar

19-07-2008, 22:24

Ah, we've been given the opportunity to put together another one of these delightful excursions into the mind of Dancougar, which often results in everyone running around in circles until finally summoning the courage to walk into the service stop to ask for directions. We've met the robot pilots, we've met the silly support. Now we need the man behind the operation. The King, you say? Well, that would make sense, but the King doesn't fly his own giant robots. His son, on the other hand, that might just work! Indeed, Daniel IV, prince of Dancougar, will one day return to the fold, along with Princess Erica, who's only been mentioned in passing.

The Kingdom of Dancougar's Omake Theater Presents
"Better Know an RP Character"

Prince Daniel is not on Qazox for the tournament, but through the miracle of modern television, we can get video from somewhere other than our mysterious little booth on the street. In fact, we can get video from almost wherever we darn well please, but rather than abuse this power, we'll show some restraint and instead sit down with the prince at this quaint country club outside the Yuki City limits.

"As is tradition, I went to military academy once I turned sixteen," says the Prince, kindly asking this interviewer to join him for drinks on the terrace. "There's no excuse to have power in a nation you can't protect. If there was a war, they'd probably insist that I command from behind the main lines... but I find it's more effective to lead from the front. I'm not so careless in battle that I would get taken out that easily!"

The prince is certainly dressed for recreation today - khaki pants and a loose-fitting polo shirt, as he's just finished a round of golf with his father and some foreign dignitaries. He looks far more imposing in his full royal garb, when he can be bothered to wear it. "I actually dislike ceremonies and all that, formality... I know there are times when it's needed, and my father can never quite understand how I manage to get by. Take today for example. I'll spend my day in something common like this, and only change in the evening for the state dinner." Do you find that people take you less seriously when you ditch the formalities? "Not at all! It's a lot easier to interact with people when they don't feel overwhelmed."

The last time we saw the prince, he had teamed up with Ben O'Bagels to take part in a beach volleyball tournament during the anniversary celebrations in Starblaydia. He was the straight man of the pair, since O'Bagels really REALLY knows how to party. You got to spend some time with Jun Aoyama, Daniel. So... anything you can tell us about that? "Aoyama-san is an incredible soldier. We're lucky to have her onboard the machine, Dancougar. She's a very strong, capable, woman. A real role model, I'd say." Uh huh. Anything else about her that you find... say, captivating? "What's that?" Daniel doesn't bat an eyelid at the question and simply places his drink on the table. Oh dear.

Daniel IV, age twenty five. Six feet, two inches tall, a hundred and seventy pounds. How soon is the future king ready to ascend to the throne? "My father is much stronger than that!" he declares. "I could do it, of course, but I'd rather not have to for another ten or twenty years." We understand, but with the King only starting to raise Dancougar's profile overseas, you could be placed in a difficult position, caught in the middle of isolation and globalization. "There are challenges that every world leader has to face," Daniel answers. "All I can do is listen to the people and do what's best for them and for the nation."

In the background, Princess Erica rides past on horseback. She's three years younger than the prince and has a fire in her eyes that matches her brother's... but we shall come to her in due time. For now, we at Omake Theater bid you adieu for this Oxen Cup. But Sportscenter will continue working toward its goal of making everyone else cry before the end of the tournament...

Newmanistan

19-07-2008, 22:53

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS PREPARE FOR YAFOR 2

Pika City, Qazox- Next up on the schedule for Newmanistan, is a clash between them and Yafor 2, and while it appeared that their eventual Di Bradini Cup group stage match between the two nations would be their first ever meeting, this one in the quarterfinals gets there first. On location in Pika City is our Jason Richards, who caught up with coach Eric Andrews to discuss things.

JR: Good afternoon, I’m here with Eric Andrews, coach of the Loudon Leopards and Newmanistan’s Oxen Cup efforts. Eric, thanks for your time.

EA: My pleasure, Jason.

JR: There has been a lot going on in Qazox lately, but the Oxen Cup is still the featured event. How are the players handling it?

EA: Very well. We’ve come to Qazox to hopefully win this Cup, and so far I very pleased with the effort of our team.

JR: So there have been no crazy failed live penguin sacrifices this time around?

EA: Nah, but the those penguins better watch it, given that they have been possessed by the Devil, or perhaps his 81st assistant. That would probably explain some of Dancougar’s media errors at the beginning of the tournament. I think the fact that has happened is proof that our penguin sacrifice, was effective.

JR: What are you talking about?

EA: If you don’t get it, you never will.

JR: What’s the plan for Yafor 2?

EA: To beat them.

JR: How are the Rockets going to go about doing that?

EA: Oh gee, let me just go through our game plan right here in public so Yafor 2 will know. The usual suspects will be put in the usual positions.

JR: Empress Jessica stated that she felt the Milchama lineup was illegal, what are your thoughts about that?

EA: Well, she made that comment before they played kenavt, and Borker actually got a card. Perhaps the referee was given notice, after hearing of the Empress’ remark, that they needed to hold Borker to the same standards that they do everyone else. As long as Borker realizes that, their lineup is fine.

JR: It made for a strange scene at the end of that game though.

EA: Perhaps, what I don’t get is why we’re talking about Milchama.

JR: I think it’s just the fact that it would be a rematch of the Oxen Cup 6 final.

EA: I guess, but right now our concern is on Yafor 2. If we lose to them, then we are done, and they are very much a quality side. We must be at our best tonight. And if we win, why is no one giving Jeruselem a chance to beat them?

JR: Maybe Kate Sallad can do something to distract them.

EA: Kate Sallad is good at that.

JR: Yafor 2 is an all female side, does that concern you?

EA: Not really, we know the female spirit can be hard to contain sometimes, but we’ll do our best.

JR: Alright Eric, we wish you the best of luck.

EA: Thanks, Jason.

Land de Wood

20-07-2008, 00:03

Welcome to our final Oxen Cup special. With our lads crashing out in the group stages, they are about to leave for home as are we but first a quick interview with our manager/prime minister Andrew Wood

Larry: Good evening Andrew,
Andrew: Good evening Larry.
Larry: So our boys took a bit of a beating against Prux
Andrew: Yes, well I thought our boys would do a bit better especially as their hasn't been much support from their media, but I guess my fringe players weren't quite as good as I hoped.
Larry: Indeed, some were surprised by you releasing your players to the u-21's despite the fact they won't play in the first game of the Di Bradini cup which has yet to take place.
Andrew: Well I wanted them to have time to recover from the flight.
Larry: So what positives can we take from this tournament?
Andrew: Well we saw some good performances and lets faced it 4th from a group of 6 in our first tournament is no mean feat especially as we were the only team in our group making our debut.
Larry: So will this be the same squad of players you take to the Baptism of Fire.
Andrew: I will probably make one or two changes, it will be interesting to see who shines in the Di Bradini cup and of course I will be reviewing performances from our own Wood Cup and the forthcoming league.
Larry: Thank you Andrew for all our interviews and we wish you and our lads all the sucess in the future.
Andrew: Thank you and good night.
Larry: Good night

And there you have it, Andrew Wood, seems satisfied with their 4th place in the group and why not.

Jeruselem

20-07-2008, 00:58

Sister Marsha in town shopping ... dresses as a normal Jeruselemite girl.

Salesman: Good morning, young lady. You're not from around here are you?
Marsha: No, I'm from Jeruselem.
Salesman: So what can I do for you? This is the best mobile phone store in town.
Marsha: I'm looking for Papal Pilgram Pack for my iPhone.

Salesman: That's an odd request ... but! We might have a few here.
Marsha: Can you look for me?
Saleman: Sure, err what's your name?
Marsha: Sister Marsha.

Salesman: You're the first Nun I've seen in a Hello Kitty dress.
Marsha: I look for like a normal Jeruselemite girl this way.
Salesman: I'll try to find one for you. Can't you find one at home?
Marsha: All sold out. Two month waiting period on these things.

<Later>

Salesman: Hey look, I've for a few here.
Marsha: I'll take all of them.
Salesman: For some reason, they aren't real cheap.
Marsha: I've got the money

Salesman: Oh yes, you're the Jeruselem Oxen Cup 7 coach.
Marsha: I maybe a Nun but I do have my own money since the world doesn't work on charity.
Salesman: Actually, I found a Papal iPhone cover too.
Marsha: I'll take that too.

Salesman: Gee, it's hard work selling stuff to you.
Marsha: I like shopping.
Salesman: I tell ya what, since you're Nun - you can get a discount.
Marsha: Yes, a bit of charity is good for the soul.

Salesman: You can't load the Papal Pilgram Pack on the iPhone in a normal way.
Marsha: That's alright. My iPhone is jail broken.
Salesman: You'll be fine then. Say, how did you do that. The new firmware is impossive to hack into.
Marsha: I got the master of phone hacking to help out.

Salesman: A guy?
Marsha: Dazza Dallas. No iPhone is safe with her around.
Salesman: Well, someone I should talk to! Let's get this stuff for you sold.
Marsha: Thanks.

Salesman: That's a fancy credit card.
Marsha: Really?
Salesman: You must be loaded for a Nun.
Marsha: I share my wealth with the Order. I do keep some for myself.

<Later>

Marsha: Where's the nearest Catholic church?
Salesman: Down the street, turn left, go past the shopping mall, and right. Drive past a Synagogue and then left.
Marsha: Thanks. God bless you.
Saleman: Thanks.

Cafundeu

20-07-2008, 03:16

GAZETA DO POVO - ALL YOU WANT TO KNOW IS HERE!
Sports Section - articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

100%

Look at the title of this article. That's it, there is no need for words to explain how good is the Cafundelense campaign until now, only numbers are necessary. 100%. 5 wins in 5 games. 15 points from 15 possible. All these numbers mean only one thing: Cafundéu seems unbeatable until now, with a perfect form, and ready for more. The players have many reasons to be motivated and to fight for the victories. First, they are wearing the NT shirt, a dream for many footballers. Second, they are fighting for a trophy, the Oxen Cup. And third, they are fighting for a place in the WC42 team.

It's no secret that the CCFM uses a secondary National Team for competitions like the Oxen Cup. But this doesn't happen because the CCFM gives less importance to these trophies. This is an extremely wrong conclusion. The CCFM gives importance to this title, and it can be proven by seeing the coach used in the competition: the experienced David Nefasto, who coached the National Team during a World Cup. So why to use alternative players? The answer is simple: offer the players a chance to show they ability wearing the red-black (sometimes yellow, sometimes grey) shirt.

In the 1st Oxen Cup this worked. Tales commanded the team in that title, and was called for the main NT soon after. This time, the players that are working the hardest to bring glory to this team are Marossi and Aristóteles, and is nearly guaranteed that Bosschaart will include their names in the next NT list. The CCFM, the players, the coach and, the most important, the supporters want the title, and is necessary to work hard for it. The place in the main NT is just a consequence.

But it won't be easy to win the Oxen Cup for the second time. After the first two games, which ended in very positive results for the Monopolists, Cafundéu is facing difficulties to continue in top form. Had serious problems to beat the two weakest teams of the group, and these difficulties remained in the game against the girls from Yafor 2. The truth is that they were talented, incredible dribblers and with a good defensive tactical sense, which made things more difficult for the Cafundelense attackers.

In the end, the Monopolists defeated them by the result of 2x1, with goals scored by Cícero and Aristóteles. Now, the Júlio Mercegues team has the difficult task of beating the hosts in the knockout rounds. Qazox is a dangerous team and, although our "B" NT has an excellent record against them, this says nothing. It will be a difficult game but, as it was said before, our players have many reasons to work hard to win it. And we should never forget that... we are 100% now.

Green wombat

20-07-2008, 03:41

Before the Jeruselem-Green wombat match, Each team knew that Starblaydia beat Kose and The Turkomans 1-0, putting all eyes on this match, that weren't alrady glued to it.

Jeruselem's Jennifer Sloan made it 1-0 in the 24th minute, but a goal from Luisa Credle tied it up at 1-all in the 31st minute. For the next 59 minutes neither side could get much offense going at all.

Then came a penalty kick for Ms. Credle with time running out. She lined it up and shot...over the crossbar by a good 5 feet and the ref blew the whistle. A draw. The only thing that the team didn't need.

But still a 3-1-1 record with 2 of the best teams in the world, is a good showing, but not good enough. Hopefully this expeirence will carry over in a couple years and this team can re-qualify for the World Cup.

Qazox

20-07-2008, 05:54

RP cutoff Time and

SCORES!

KNOCKOUT BRACKET (winners in Bold, as usual)

QUARTERFINALS aka VERY LONG DAY
QF1- Newmanistan v Yafor 2 1-1, 2-1 (AET)
QF2- Milchama v Jeruselem 2-1
QF3- Starblaydia v Dancougar 2-2, 2-2 (AET) Starblaydia Wins on PK (2-1)
QF4- Cafundeu v Qazox 2-2, 3-2 (AET)

SEMIFINALS @ SaxerDome, SaxerVilla, Capacity: 85,000.
SF1- Newmanistan v Jeruselem
SF2- Starblaydia v Cafundeu

3rd Place match- @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.
Semifinal losers

CHAMPIONSHIP- @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.
Semifinal winners

Newmanistan

20-07-2008, 09:38

THE ROCKET REPORT

VERY LATE GOAL SENDS ROCKETS FORWARD

Pika City, Qazox- After many starters got the game off against West Zirconia, Newmanistan’s lineup was back to normal for the match against Yafor 2, the first ever meeting between the nations. The Golden Wolves of Yafor 2 were an all female team, so certainly the Rockets knew they needed to be on their toes for this kind of opponent. Awaiting the winner was a showdown against either Milchama or Jeruselem in the semifinals.

In the beginning stages of the match, both teams seemed to be equally guilty of trying to be too precise with their tactics, thinking too much instead of doing, and the end result was some pretty sloppy play to the observers in the stands. Much of the action was contained to the midfield in the early minutes, and when one of the teams seemed to get in a prime attacking position, something would happen to break the play up, whether an offsides, or an errant pass that led to a clear. The defenses on both sides were the most effective units out there. Finally, in the games 20th minute, we saw a quality shot on goal, and it was executed by the Golden Wolves as the young Saria Sebard and Jaria Soradrin connected nicely, but Soradrin’s shot was stopped by a diving Corey Hennis, who got a very good look at the shot. Yafor 2 began to carry some momentum off of this and controlled the tempo of the match. Soradrin was having the best of the chances, but the Rockets always seemed to have someone in position, whether a defender or Hennis, just in time, to keep the game in scoreless mode. In the 37th minute, Yafor 2's Adriana Mutu, was yellow carded for punching Brett Prescott after Prescott aggressively tackled him, errr her. Prescott’s tackle was dirty, but the referee was not looking in his direction at the time, and it appeared as though Prescott gave Mutu an elbow in the chin while they were down. When the referee saw the two of them, all he saw was the retaliatory punch. Those rooting for the Golden Wolves were very pissed over this yellow card, and they were egged on by Prescott, who waved his arms in the air as if to encourage them to boo even more. That was probably the most excitement we had in the first half, as the teams headed off with nothing but zeroes up on the scoreboard.

As the second half got underway, Newmanistan seemed to take control of the match for themselves, and the Yafor 2 players constantly found themselves trailing the play. In the 55th minute, the Rockets squandered a great chance when a pass from Alex Parnett to Kevin Lewis was just a half second too early, and Lewis was offsides. Kevin however, strongly disagreed with the referee’s whistle, and it would take a yellow card issued to him to get him to quiet down. This put coach Andrews in a tough situation, as Lewis would be a big loss if were to pick up a second yellow card and the Rockets were to advance. Yet there was still a lot of time left here, and he needed him here. Andrews resisted his temptation to make the substitute. The Golden Wolves, though, regained the momentum following the yellow card, and they quickly capitalized on it to score the matches’ first goal in minute 59. The goal was scored Bathria Baaldin off a nice set up from Soradrin to put Yafor 2 up by a goal. Their celebration following the goal was a little interesting too, and the Rockets looked and stood in disbelief. That was good enough to distract the Rockets a little more, and the Golden Wolves continued to have the better of play for the next ten minutes or so. Fortunately for Newmanistan, Corey Hennis was determined to not allow another such celebration, and did a great job keeping the ball out. The clock then hit 80, and it was coming clear that the Rockets needed to force the issue and go with an all out attack. Alex Parnett would be the catalyst, in theory, but he was very well contained by the defense. So instead, Jeremy Brooker, from the back end made a big run himself. It was a bit surprising to the opposition, but Jeremy had done this before, thinking back to the big goal he scored in the semifinals of the 4th Di Bradini Cup against Sorthern Northland. Brooker did not stop, and the Rockets all tried to position themselves in great spots for a cross, assuming Jeremy would. Yafor 2 attempted a couple times to get the ball off him, but now Newmanistan had numbers. The cross was fired. Perfectly into the center and who was there? None other then Jeremy McAllister. J-Mac retrieved the pass, and blasted it home, for his first goal in three games. It was the equalizer, in the 82nd minute, we were all tied up. Using the momentum, Newmanistan almost won it in the 86th, but goalkeeper Morelia Traad, just got enough fingertip to it to push it wide, and the corner was successfully deflected. The whistle would sound not long after. We were going to extra time.

The start of extra time was extremely conservative, as the Rockets especially seemed to focus more on defense as they were confident they could win in penalty kicks against this opponent. Yafor 2 was still a little bummed out about surrendering the 82nd minute goal, and you could see it in their execution. It just wasn’t there. They were tired, and unable to put more then two passes together successfully. The patient Rockets sat back, and cleared on each occasion, and the first half of extra time ended very quickly and uneventfully, it seemed. The 2nd half started out much like the 1st ended in terms of the Golden Wolves just not being smooth in their execution. They were drained, and that is where we really have to give Brett Prescott and Kevin Carrigan a pat on the back, their super aggressive tackling over the entire match were having a toll on the opponent, especially their midfielders. Extra time began to wind down, and for the first time, Newmanistan started to pounce. The Rockets, too, were tired, but they seemed to be winning the stamina battle by a considerable margin. Eric Andrews sensed this, and had his team reach down deep and go for the win, right here, in extra time. In the 119th minute, the Rockets delivered a dagger to the heart of the young ladies from Yafor 2. A Shawn Drummond shot was initially stopped, but pouncing on the rebound was that guy who’d been pushing them around all game long. Brett Prescott. He was there, and fired it home. The blue and white were going crazy in the stands. Newmanistan had won the contest, 2-1. They will advance to the semifinals for their first ever game with the Sallad girls. Newmanistan has one lifetime meeting with Jeruselem, a 5-2 victory in the group stage of the 4th Di Bradini Cup.

Jeruselem

20-07-2008, 13:00

Jeruselem Government News

God vs Maggie! The battle at the Oxen Cup 7.

Jeruselem took on Milchama at the Oxen Cup 7 for a place in the semi-final. It was the team favoured by Maggie vs God's team of sinners and saints. Both teams have the dubious honour of losing a World Cup final and both have been or are in the top 5 of World Cup. However both have unique personalities which do not seem to be emulated anywhere else in the world.

Jeruselem went out hard and tried gain the initiative against a one man team who seems to have been cloned 10 times on the field. It didn't help when all the Milchama players had the same name either, confusing the Jeruselemites a little. It came undone when Jacinta Sallad supposed tripped over Bugsy Borker. She later complained "Hey, I didn't f**king see the m***erf**ker f**king around there. How I am supposed to deliberately trip over someone I didn't know he or it or whatever was over there". Bugsy converted the penalty leaving Jeruselem 1-0 down.

The Jeruselemites in the crowd waved some weird signs saying "Bugsy loves Maggie!" to make the atmosphere a bit strange. Jeruselem renewed their attack knowing it was only way to save the game. Jenny Sloan got kicked in the privates by Bugsy Borker, and the ref didn't quite know which one so he randomly picked one of them to give the foul to. Jeruselem scored from the free kick when Coss Cohen scored a rare goal.

Sister Marsha finally put in Kate Sallad replacing her sister Jacinta who earned her rest with a solid perforance apart from the tripping incident. Kate was up to her tricks baffling the Bugsy Borkers in defense. Kate pushed a cracking pass through some Borker to Jenny Sloan who barged her way past some static defense to score the winning goal.

Jeruselem faces Newmanistan who defeated Yafor 2 who's roster looks a bit like ours ... 2-1 in extra time. The imitation Princesses type team from Yafor 2 failed to beat Newmanistan but can the real Princesses?

In the other game, World Champs Starblaydia had to fight off Dancougar winning on penalty kicks. They meet Cafundeu who pushed out hosts Qazox 3-2 in extra time.

Should Jeruselem make the final, they'll face an opponent who has beaten them in World Cup. The Princesses want to be Queen of Oxen cup, not the bridemaids.

Newmanistan

20-07-2008, 17:22

(Players gather in the hotel meeting room the morning of the Jeruselem contest)

Brooker: Finally!!!

Drummond: Woohooo!!!

Lewis: What are you guys so excited about?

Brooker: At last, we get to play Jeruselem, and their team of hotties!

Lewis: Shouldn’t you guys be focusing on how we’re going to go about beating them, so we can get to the final, and maybe, possibly, actually win in a final.

Prescott: Oh even I’m thinking about getting an extra feel when I tackle Miss Kate Sallad. She knows I’m a dirty player anyway so she probably wouldn’t think anything of it. (Receives a high-five from Brooker)

Drummond: She wouldn’t think anything of it even if you weren’t a dirty player. (Also receives a high five from Brooker)

McAllister: I wish we could have had this match with them before I got engaged.

Brooker: Well you should have thought about that first.

Prescott: Don’t worry because there’s plenty of incentive to win this match, so we’ll be focused.

Lewis: I sure hope so.

Brooker: Yeah, either we play Starblaydia in the final, and that would be cool or we play, our second home. Cafundeu!!!

Prescott: Dunboor FC sucks! A.F.F. Emperor’s Cup champions bayy-beeeee!!

Lewis: Didn’t Dunboor FC beat Eric Andrews’ Loudon Leopards in the Globe Cup?

Brooker: Hell yeah, that game was a thrill. We never beat Loudon when I was with South Charlotte!

Prescott: And our man Drummy’s coming to Cafundeu this season, too. What’s that club you’re playing on now?

Drummond: Atletico Jutense.

McAllister: What’s with Cafundeu, though? Why are so many of us going there?

Brooker: Because they understand the talents of the Newmanistanian football player.

McAllister: There’s only one foreign country I would consider playing in. Even though I want to stay in Newmanistan. And it’s not Cafundeu. Nothing against them.

Drummond: Who?

McAllister: Starblaydia. I still feel I have a connection with Simeone Di Bradini, I don’t know why.

Prescott: Well we get to play one of them whether we win or lose, technically, but let’s not think about that other game. All about the championship.

Lewis: Don’t take it easy on the Jeruselem chicks just because they’re hot, Brett.

Prescott: Oh hell no. I’m gonna be more rough with them probably.

Brooker: They like it that way. (shouting) Hey Team I have a question!

(Team looks in Brooker’s way)

Brooker: If you were single and could only have one of them. Jacinta or Kate Sallad?

Chapman: What about Jennifer Sloan? Nah, she’s too young for me. Good thing I’m married.

Parnett: Beth Bootin, I hear she’s easy.

Carrigan: Most of them are.

Harrison: No one’s even mentioned the freak Dazzarina Intern yet?

Parnett: Ooh, she’s nice too.

McElroy: Jamie Hyneman!

Harrison: No one asked you, Julie!

McElory: Too bad!

Brooker: Alright, alright. So there are more options. But Jacinta or.....

Drummond: Coach is coming, we’ll get back to it. Game faces on, people!

Team: Good morning, coach!

Dancougar

21-07-2008, 00:13

KENNETH: On a day when it seemed like nobody could get the job done in ninety minutes, Dancougar and Starblaydia. The winner would meet either powerhouse Cafundeu or hosts Qazox. Plenty of high drama all over the nation in a tough-looking quarterfinal stage, and boy did it ever deliver. Let's get to the highlights, and right away, Starblaydia try to stamp their authority on this one. England comes down the right side of the field, and pushes the ball past Fey to get a cross in... it's high and just over Callind's head. Minute ten, another chance, and this time Na-Me's shot takes a deflection off Ieyasu; Vaccarino just barely gets a touch on it to push it over! Then minute sixteen, still scoreless... not anymore! Callind finds an opening in the box and Kuu feeds him the ball. Vaccarino can only guess where this one's going... the shot hits the back of the net to make it 1-0 to the world champion purple menace.

SCOTTY: But it seems to bring Dancougar back into the game a bit, and in minute twenty four, it's a response! Heckendorf wins a battle in midfield and pushes it up for Hayashi, who lofts it over Buckstone for Saitooooooo.... great save by Westwood!! Cuts down the angle and gets his hand out to block it, but the game is now opening up. Minute thirty two, Saito again, working on Buckstone. Leaves it for Kawaguchi, who fires it through the defense, but Westwood gobbles it up. Chance for Starblaydia, now, just before the break, as captain Stafador finds England at the top of the box for the drive... Vaccarino the save to keep it 1-0! And the big saves coming right after another... a sign of things to come.

KENNETH: But first, the second half, and Dancougar came out on fire. Culverhouse, minute fifty three, finally gets a run down the left side, and he faces di Bradini. Stepover, doesn't bite... squares it for Voronzoff, whose shot bounces off Buckstone and to the feet of Saito, who pulls the trigger... POST! Minute fifty six, after saving a Bentley header, Vaccarino punts it long downfield... and it's volleyed behind the defense by Culverhouse, and Kawaguchi is onside!!! Kawaguchi pushes it up and pokes it over the goalkeeper, and the lightning counterattack ties the game at one! Unbelievable lob pass by Culverhouse into space, and Kawaguchi just wins the footrace.

SCOTTY: And they weren't done. Five minutes later, sixty first minute, Kawaguchi sends in a corner... Culverhouse beats everyone to the near post and slips it in between the legs of di Bradini, and all of a sudden, it's 2-1! Great reaction by the forward to get to the ball first, and expert placement... BUT, we're talking about the world champs, here. And they weren't about to get shown up by some college kids from Dancougar. Minute seventy seven, lucky sevens for Na-Me, who wins a free kick just outside the eighteen after a clumsy foul by Tomokazu, who would see yellow. Up steps the Stafador, and the kick... through the wall, but Vaccarino gets to it! But the rebound is met by Callind! Second goal of the game for him, and it's all tied at two. So we would go into extra time!

KENNETH: In the extra frame, minute ninety nine, Tomokazu brings down Bentley and here comes the referee... oh boy, a second yellow for him, he's gone, and Dancougar are down to ten men. Starblaydia try to push home the advantage on the free kick... header... reaction save by Vaccarino!! Second half of extra time, DuPont tells his men to hold out for penalties, and the purple shirts put Vaccarino to work. Callind for the hat trick... denied. Long cross, picked out of the air. Vaccarino made five saves in the final fifteen minutes, and Dancougar managed only a single shot at overtime. But the ref blows, and we go to the shootout. And what can we say, except goalie dual.

SCOTTY: Dancougar kicks first, and Culverhouse puts it in, cool as you like. Callind steps up for Starblaydia... SAVED BY VACCARINO! Guessed right, shot right, pushed away. Now Kawaguchi, to try and take the advantage... SAVE BY WESTWOOD! Bentley for Starblaydia... saved! Brittain for Dancougar... OVER THE BAR! Stafador scores for Starblaydia, so after three kicks apiece, we're tied at one apiece. Now, Kano Saito for Dancougar, surely he has the answer... NO! Westwood notches another huge save! Can Kuu give Starblaydia the edge... NO! Pounds it wide left after Vaccarino dove to the right! One kicker left for each team. Alexei Voronzoff for Dancougar... SAVE BY WESTWOOD!!! Incredible, a fingertip save, but it doesn't matter! Last up for the purples, di Bradini...

RADIO CALL: And here's the defender... di Bradini. A proud name in Starblaydian football history, but can the younger forge some of his own? Right here, against Heath Vaccarino... run up... SCOOOOOOOOOOOORES!!! HE'S DONE IT! DI BRADINI MAKES SIMEONE PROUD WITH A BEAST OF A HIT!! Vaccarino dove the right way, and could only watch it motor past him!!

KENNETH: The game ends 2-2 after extra time, and a 2-1 penalty shootout win for Starblaydia, in a match that outlasted all the others. The semifinals are now set, with Newmanistan taking on Jeruselem and Starblaydia going up against Cafundeu... that ought to be a mammoth showdown. As for the Black Wings...

Kingdom of Dancougar College All-Stars

GK Heath Vaccarino (3-1-2, 9 GA): Pick 24 by King's Eleven Yuki City
GK Charlie Hughart: Pick 33 by Aiken City United
D Joseph Cecilia: Pick 18 by Shuukyuu Kishin
D Chad Fey: Pick 14 by CF America Chuuoushi
D Fritz Heckendorf: Pick 3 by Raymaley Athletic
D Jiro Ieyasu: Pick 12 by Mizuno no Juuichi
D Johnnie Kingsford: Nara College, junior season
D Alec Penoyer: Monagham State College, senior season
D Ando Tomokazu (1 goal): Akasaka University, junior season
M Gus Brittain: Pick 4 by Eastport United
M Fritz Eisenbach: Granger Island College, senior season
M Shigekazu Hayashi: Pick 15 by Aiken City United
M Tetsuo Kawaguchi (4 goals): Pick 1 by Dynamo Kalinsk
M Dwayne Landro: Port Royal University, junior season
M Jared Matthews: Pick 11 by Stoneridge United
M Aaron Sundling: Pick 6 by King's Eleven Yuki City
M Alexei Voronzoff (1 goal): Barynsk College, junior season
F Edmund Brinks: University of Shiba, junior season
F Blaine Culverhouse (4 goals): Pick 5 by Coraopolis FC
F Glen Rotondo: Pollock College, junior season
F Kano Saito (3 goals): Pick 8 by Port Vigilence FC

Jeruselem

21-07-2008, 01:44

Marsha: You look tired Dazza.
Dazza: Hard night ...
Marsha: Getting stuffed like a turkey again?
Dazza: Oh yeah, I'm not a young as used to be.

Marsha: Guys still like older women?
Dazza: Well, I look a lot younger than I am.
Marsha: Getting too old there Dazza.
Dazza: I think I'll leaving all the whoring to my daughters now.

Marsha: I'm sure Kate Sallad can help out there too.
Dazza: She keeps the Dallas tradition well.
Marsha: This Newmanistan team is pretty good.
Dazza: Yes, we have work hard to beat them.

Marsha: We have to watch the Julie Elroy character, she's the Kate Sallad of the team.
Dazza: Yes, she's very dangerous. Must keep her quiet so we can control the game.
Marsha: She's the only girl in the team.
Dazza: Yeah, odd ... the rest of the team are guys.

Marsha: We'll put Jacinta Sallad to mark that superdude Jeremy McAllister.
Dazza: He's their main man for goals. We need to shut him down with some Sallad magic.
Marsha: The team Kevin Lewis is a bit of religious guy too.
Dazza: Religious people can be very hard to beat.

Marsha: Jeremy Brooker looks like a tough man to beat.
Dazza: I think he'll be marking out Jenny.
Marsha: Looking at the team, all pretty good players in their own right.
Dazza: We need a 110% game here, and 150% for the final.

Marsha: One girl in a team of guys, you'd be happy.
Dazza: Well, they aren't Jeruselemites. I don't think she's a slut.
Marsha: You think there's overawed?
Dazza: They're guys ... they like hot women. Jeruselem women are the hottest around. They'd be really keen!

Marsha: I hope there's no tackling. It'd be so tempting to tackle hot girlies.
Dazza: There's only one Jeruselem.
Marsha: What about Jeru FC?
Dazza: Oh them, they are their own character. Say, why don't you try for the Jeru FC coaching job?

Marsha: Me? I'm not exactly the person the army would like. I'm a Nun, not a disciplined army person.
Dazza: They hired me as a coach.
Marsha: Oh but army guys like whores.
Dazza: Think about it, you could do a great job.

Marsha: No, guns scare me too much.
Dazza: Oh yes, I forgot about that.
Marsha: That's alright, no one is perfect.

Cafundeu

21-07-2008, 02:32

GAZETA DO POVO - ALL THAT YOU WANT TO KNOW IS HERE!
Sports Section - articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
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TEAM NEEDED 120 MINUTES TO WIN THE GAME

After a perfect campaign in the group stage of the seventh Oxen Cup, the Monopolists had Qazox as quarterfinals opponents. Not an easy game, of course, as our players would have to face the opponents in front of their fans. But the confidence and motivation among the players was high, something natural after five consecutive wins, and the team was ready to defeat Qazox, even knowing that it would be a difficult game. But the opponents were ready to face Cafundéu too.

The hosts had a magnificent performance and complicated things for the Monopolists, who suffered a goal in the seventh minute of the game. But the early goal didn't destroy the hopes of the Cafundelense, who found forces to react and score the goal before the middle of the first half, in an excellent free kick taken by Silvinho. Qazox tried to reply in the next play, but Kardec made an excellent save, in a shot that seemed to go directly to the goal. Still in the first half, Cafundéu even tried to score again with Wágner Paulista, but he lost the ball before the shot.

In the second half, the game continued equal, and both teams had the chance to decide the game. Qazox's attacks were more direct, with many crossings. Cafundéu used more short passes, long ranged shots and individual plays. And the Monopolists scored the second goal before their opponents. Wágner Paulista received the ball from Vital still in the defence and made a magnificent pass to Ricardão, who dribbled an opponent and made the pass to Rossi, who shot to score the goal (both Ricardão and Rossi entered as substitutes).

But Cafundéu wasn't able to hold the positive result until the end of the game. The pressure of Qazox was big, and the defence (the most criticized sector of the team - there are even rumours of a Squornshelous player entering in the Cafundéu NT for the next WC) didn't hold it. When there were 5 minutes remaining for the end of the game, Qazox scored. The game would go to the extra time. In the first half of the extra time, few action, probably because the players were tired with the intensity of the game. But the Cafundelenses seemed to be less tired, and this would be decisive in the second half...

In the second minute of the second half of the extra time, Marossi found a space in the opponent defence and made a magnificent pass to Fausto, who dribbled the goalkeeper and shot...

...the ball hit the post.

Fausto needed a rebound to score this goal. I'm sure he'll not be much praised.

Qazox

21-07-2008, 05:22

!ffotuc PR rof emit s'tI

:serocs eht dnA

(DLOB ni sernniW)

SEMIFINALS @ SaxerDome, SaxerVilla, Capacity: 85,000.
SF1- Newmanistan v Jeruselem 3-1
SF2- Starblaydia v Cafundeu 2-0

3rd Place match- @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.
STARBLAYDIA vs. NEWMANISTAN (Monday Night)

CHAMPIONSHIP- @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.
CAFUNDEU vs. JERUSELEM (Tuesday Night)

Newmanistan

21-07-2008, 06:10

THE ROCKET REPORT

STRONG JERUSELEM PERFORMANCE DOWNS ROCKETS

SaxerVilla, Qazox- Some losses are frustrating. Others just leave you in awe with the realization that your opponent simply wasn’t going to be denied. There wasn’t anything particularly wrong with the way that Newmanistan played in their semifinal, but there wasn’t a single thing wrong with the performance of the Princesses. The final scoreline of 3-1 tells the tale of the dominating performance displayed by them on this night as they head to the final against Cafundeu while the Rockets head to the consolation game against Starblaydia.

The match started out well for the Rockets, as they were up to this challenge. The early moments saw a lot of great plays from both teams, but where Jeruselem was especially good in the beginning was in their back end. Jacinta Sallad had a big game, including one particularly great play getting to a loose ball off a deflection moments before Jeremy McAllister would have had a simple tap in goal. The Sallad’s are the well known figures of the team for well, their figures, but John Kranzoy and Geovanni Dallas also were brilliant. Dazzarina Intern, well, she was alright, but seemed distracted at times. Newmanistan was solid too, early, defensively, though they would be the first to crack. Shaka Hislop fired a 33rd minute shot past Hennis for the 1-nothing lead, but the hard work on the play was done by Jennifer Sloan, one of the world’s top up and coming players. Sloan using some shifty moves got around both Borsinger and Harrison, before sliding the pass over to Hislop. Hennis was a quarter second late to react to the pass, and that’s all the time Hislop needed. Three minutes later, came the dagger when Kate Sallad made a beautiful interception of a Alex Parnett pass and made a nice pass of her own to Sloan, who barely remained onsides, then outsprinted Borsinger to be alone on Hennis. Corey was helpless, and it was 2-nil Jeruselem. The quick nature of goals continued though, as in the 40th minute, Newmanistan got that one right back off a free kick by Jeremy McAllister. His shot was perfectly placed to make it 2-1, which is where we were at the intermission.

The second half started out with both teams wanting to make a statement, so the fans here in Qazox were treated to some absolutely incredible football that kept them on their edge of their seats. The two sides exchanged chances, back and forth, but each was answered by either a last second stop by a defender, or by the skills of the keeper. The next goal, and you knew there would be a next goal by someone at this rate, would be huge. Either we’re 2-2, or 3-1. Unfortunately for us, in the 64th minute, it became 3-1. Jennifer Sloan again, her second of the match. From there, Jeruselem clamped down on defense in excellent fashion. Try as they might, Newmanistan found penetration of Jacinta Sallad and her defensive partner’s difficult, and couldn’t generate the kind of chances they may have wanted too. The effort was there, the result not. This was Jeruselem’s day, no matter how you slice it.

With the win, Jeruselem will meet Cafundeu in the Oxen Cup 7 final, and it should be a contest that we should watch in the Empire regardless. Both teams are playing great football, and it should be a truly entertaining match. Newmanistan will meet up with Starblaydia, in the first ever meeting between the nations that counts. They met in a friendly after Newmanistan’s Baptism of Fire win, with Starblaydia winning at Pocono City Stadium. Now, it’s for 3rd place. Despite it being a consolation match, expect both teams to play well and play hard. Newmanistan, obviously, would love to get a win over the reigning World Cup and AOCAF champions, while Starblaydia can always be expected to give it their best.

Cafundeu

22-07-2008, 00:15

GAZETA DO POVO - ALL YOU WANT TO KNOW IS HERE!
Sports Section - articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
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ONE GAME SEPARATING THE TEAM FROM THE TITLE

Fighting for another title of the Oxen Cup, the Monopolists got prepared to make an excellent campaign since before the start of the competition. The CCFM chose a quality coach (Júlio Mercegues) to lead the team, players that have chances of going to play in the next World Cup... these things guaranteed a motivated team, with enough ability to fight for the title. Now, only game separates the Monopolists from the Oxen Cup trophy, a game against Jeruselem.

First, in the group stage, Cafundéu won all the five games, the best campaign between all the teams in the competition. Then, the Monopolists had a difficult challenge in the quarterfinals against Qazox, in a game that was only decided in the extra time. Then, it was time to play in the semifinals, with Starblaydia as opponents. A difficult team to beat, as Qazox was. But the fact is that Cafundéu seemed ready to win the game against both.

Starblaydia had an offensive strategy in the game, similar to Cafundéu's. But, in the midfield, the red-black players seemed to have the ball under their control, and this was the key for Cafundéu's success in the game. Starblaydia had few scoring opportunities in the game thanks to the dominance of the Cafundelense midfielders, and Cafundéu's attacks were intense and in numbers. But, in the first half, the players lost too many chances, and the result was 0x0.

A change was necessary in the second half, and Júlio Mercegues ordered the team to be even more offensive, without losing the midfield control of the game. The strategy changes worked, and soon the Cafundelenses scored a goal, with Marossi, who is considered by many the best player of the team. The team continued attacking and wanted to guarantee the victory, and Vital's goal did this. 2x0, and Starblaydia couldn't react. The victory that sent the team to the final.

In the other game, Newmanistan lost to Jeruselem by 3x1. This means that the final will be between Cafundéu and Jeruselem, a final that also happened in the Turtle Cup, when Cafundéu lost.

Jeruselem

22-07-2008, 01:01

Jeruselem Government News

Football's Barbie Dolls into another final!

Jeruselem success in small tournaments just continues. Jeruselem danced into the final of the Oxen Cup 7 with a strong 3-1 over a valiant Newmanistan who tried hard but our Princesses were too good on the day. Goals to Shaka Hislop and a pair to Jenny Sloan sealed the result with Newmanistan scoring with goal machine Jeremy McAllister making his contribution to the game.

Both teams put on a show of skill and determined football but the finals experience of the Princesses proved the difference. The new Fiskin Dallas ... Jacinta Sallad put in a solid game with her fellow defenders. Putting in the hard yards and a big effort to stop Jeremy McAllister scoring was not easy. Jeremy McAllister had a great game but was shut down with determined defense.

Jeruselem's midfield battled hard to control the game with both sides skillfully trying bust open rock solid defenses. Kate Sallad got quite a bit of attention getting a few heavy tackles to slow her down, often ending up on her back - a position she's accustomed to off-field.

Captain Jane Darian had a busy day being the strong woman in goal as both sides sought more goals. Jenny Sloan who is now the chief scorer with the retirement of Kara Kool proved she was up to the task scoring two goals. Both teams got on pretty well after the game ended with the guys from Newmanistan keen to get friendly with the Jeruselem girls.

Jeruselem face off with Cafundeu again, the team which took their place in the 2nd round of the World Cup 41. Cafundeu defeated the Purple Menace in the guise of World Champs Starblaydia. That win was no fluke so Jeruselem need to beat a team which beat the World Champs!

Starblaydia face Newmanistan for 3rd place playoff and if Newmanistan found Jeruselem hard to beat, they need more effort now against the World Champs who aren't used to losing games.

People may laugh at the antics of the Princesses but the team known for it's "Barbie Girl" football players aren't just good looking - they can play football too. With the Jeruselem win, the local football authorities played the new single from "The Two Jacintas" aka Jacinta Dallas and Jacinta Sallad - "Dallas Girl", a rather naughty version of Barbie Girl. The media were quite interesting in Dazza Dallas and Sister Marsha doing a bit dancing on the sidelines after the win to music.

Qazox

22-07-2008, 05:03

3RD PLACE MATCH @ Qazian Memorial Stadium, Qazox City, Capacity: 98,000.

NEWMANISTAN- 2
STARBLAYDIA- 2
(2-2 A.E.T)

STARBLAYDIA (PK 4-3)

Star gets 3rd place.
Newmanistan is 4th.

Tommorrow is the exciting conclusion!

Newmanistan

22-07-2008, 06:24

Blah..... oh well we took the defending World Cup champs to PK's. Nothing wrong with 4th. (No more additional RP here just because a domestic situation has taken most of my RP energy for the night)

Newmanistan Goals: Jeremy McAllister & Shawn Drummond, please, if Starbladyia RP's it!

Jeruselem

22-07-2008, 15:34

Reporter:
Hello! I'm Marky Mark for Ariddians Abroad News. The news for Ariddians and their families. I'm Qazox at the Oxen Cup 7 where Jeruselem face the Monopolists in the final. Actually there's only one Ariddian playing in the Jeruselem team - and that's Flak Sho. Now, I'm speaking with other Ariddian in the team ... the one and only Lady Dazzarina Handiskya Dallas who was Jeruselem Ambassador to Ariddia but now she's the Ambassador to Qazox.

Dazza: Hello Ariddia and Ariddians everywhere.
Reporter: Now, this is a big final for Jeruselem here.
Dazza: Yes, it's time we showed our team looks and can be winners too.
Reporter: With Kara Kool and Fiskin Dallas retired, it's time for the younger members to show the way.

Dazza: The kids must take over. It's their time now, and time for them to show the world they are ready.
Reporter: The Oxen Cup 7 coach is young too. Sister Marsha is a very young coach.
Dazza: Yes, but she's been learning. We made this final, so she's done a fantastic job with the team missing the likes of Kara and Fishy Dallas.
Reporter: Now, not many Nuns coach teams. In fact, maybe not since Wentland's Women's World Cup 10 team.

Dazza: I don't think the coach was a Nun of that team. It was dubious the team had any real Nuns either.
Reporter: You think the good sister will be able to handle the big job.
Dazza: Well, she hasn't applied for the World Cup 42 coaching position as yet.
Reporter: You think she will?

Dazza: She's not a very ambitious person really. She might apply at all.
Reporter: What about you?
Dazza: No no, I like being Technical Manager. It's a less stressful job.
Reporter: So what do you do?

Dazza:
I'm just someone who watches but doesn't do the management. The coach does most of the work as normal but I can give advice and help out with matters when the coach gets stuck.

Reporter: So you're a bit of loose end?
Dazza: Well, also being the Ambassador to Qazox ... I sort out the immigration crap.
Reporter: A lot of teams employ psychologists to boost performance, what about Jeruselem?
Dazza: Oh, we don't have one but I could be called the team psychologist. I'm the resident Mother you can say.

Reporter: So, are the team ready for a big win?

Dazza:
A big win? Any win will do now. The Monopolists progressed in the World Cup 41 to 2nd round instead of us and lost the Starblaydia to be knocked out in the end. They beat the Purple Menace here so we'll be aiming to knock them off their perch. We don't have much to lose, they do. We're here to prove we'll be back as contenders next cup.

Reporter: So is it a revenge game?
Dazza: Yes, but not in a vicious way. We want to win because it's a final. You don't get to finals for lose.
Reporter: If you do win, will you be running around naked on the field.
Dazza: No, I'm too old for that. I'll delegate that to the Sallad girls.

Reporter: Flak Sho hasn't getting much attention this cup, why is that?
Dazza: Because, everyone is too busy looking at the girls in the team.
Reporter: I suppose that is true with most media being male.
Dazza: Ask the girls, they'll have a different focus.

Reporter: You're looking good for a grandmother. Is it because you're an Ariddian?
Dazza: Frenchies are masters of looking good at any age.
Reporter: We're heard you even score a root this week.
Dazza: Yeah! Not bad for an oldie but I leave all the rooting to my kids now.

Reporter: Good luck with the Jeruselem team in the final.
Dazza: Thanks, hello again to Ariddians. May the Bike be in you.
Reporter: That's a new one Dazza.
Dazza: Yeah

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