NationStates Jolt Archive

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SFA-Logo.gif
The Fifth Di Bradini Cup
An Under-21 International Tournament

This is the fifth international Under-21 football tournament to held by the SFA, Starblaydia is proud to be the venue for the fourth installment what is now fairly regarded as a replacement for the Under-21 World Cup. Twenty-four teams have come to Starblaydia, and one will emerge as the champions, to lift the fifth Di Bradini Cup! Unfortunately, the great man himself has now passed on into the next life, making this the first of the Di Bradini Cups to be playing in honour of his memory.

The first matches taking place on the evening (GMT) of Thursday the 1st of May. Starblaydia, as hosts, are automatically be placed in Group A, with the remaining draw coming out of seeded pots at random.

Group Draw (DBC Ranking to come)
Group A
Kenavt
Starblaydia (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13670694&postcount=63)
Lovisa
Candelaria And Marquez (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13654103&postcount=14)
Jeruselem (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13652673&postcount=9)
The Macabees (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13651746&postcount=3)

Group B
Fmjphoenix
Daehanjeiguk (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13652523&postcount=7)
Gwaine (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13654406&postcount=15)
Pablicosta
Milchama
Taeshan (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13656907&postcount=21)

Group C
Elves Security Forces (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13655009&postcount=16)
Bazalonia
Fujisawan Territories (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13652484&postcount=6)
Newmanistan (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13653543&postcount=13)
Cafundeu (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13657166&postcount=24)
Ofedestan (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13657492&postcount=26)

Group D
Yafor 2 (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13665745&postcount=43)
West Starblaydia (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13673915&postcount=71)
United Heztel
Nethertopia (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13672349&postcount=65)
Agroprom
Blouman Empire (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=13655621&postcount=18)


Group Schedule
MD1: 4v1, 5v3, 2v6
MD2: 1v5, 2v3, 6v4
MD3: 2v5, 3v4, 1v6
MD4: 1v2, 4v5, 6v3
MD5: 3v1, 4v2, 5v6

(e.g. on MD1, Group A will be: Candelaria And Marquez Vs Kenavt, Jeruselem Vs Lovisa and Starblaydia Vs The Macabees

QF1: 1st A will play 2nd B
QF2: 1st B will play 2nd A
QF3: 1st C will play 2nd D
QF4: 1st D will play 2nd C

SF1: Winners of QF1 + QF2
SF2: Winners of QF3 + QF4

Stadia (match locations TBA)

OOC: Thanks for the heads-up :(

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: No
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: no
Godmod Other Events: Yes


Mika D'Angíel was a young [of course, otherwise he wouldn't be here], yet strong and tall, forward in the Macabee under-twenty-one [U-21] football team. Although the team had not played any international competitions, whether major or friendly, he had become the unofficial star of the team during the training sessions, showing natural talent for what he had been selected to play as. There was no doubt that he would have to show this 'natural talent' where and when it mattered - on the playing field - but, insofar he had shown to be one of the best on the team. It, therefore, wouldn't be surprising to find out that he had been picked up by the National Macabee U-21 Football Team's head coach [Derek Vadíern] almost immediately after this latter man had seen him play for Fedala Unified University's student football team [although, not considered one of the best college football teams in the nation]. Well, perhaps some would find it surprising without ever knowing D'Angíel, given the rarity of a player getting picked up at a college without playing professionally first, but most figured out the deal when they saw the young man scrimage during training. Besides, Mika radiated a very formidable personality and character, especially given the muscles in his legs - the large quads, for example - and his equally as big arms.

The rest of the team was nothing to scoff at either, although most were from either '3rd Division' and less from '2nd Division'. Very few were from '1st Division' `[also referred to as 'the league'], as these were normally reserved for the Macabee National Team, to present itself once against for World Cup Forty-One . Regardless, 'racial wise' Macabee men tended to be tall, strong, fast and agile, although it was unfair to classify per race and to publisize it in this way would unfairly characterize the Second Empire of the Golden Throne as a country that based itself on race - this is not true, but The Macabee's can neither be considered a 'melting pot of international culture' [after the War of Golden Succession, however, the Empire assimilated a large number of Havenic citizens (Safehaven2) and Guffingfordi citizens, giving the Empire a larger Hispanic and Latin population -although these are concentrated in their former homelands, and have not migrated]. Without having to dig one's own grave, it would be safe to say that the majority of the players in this team fitted within that shallow and vague description.

The team counted on two goal keepers, Daví Res and Fedor Balken, as well as six defenders - Mique Relos, Saltavór Gertud, Franz Klein, Javeir Lok, Heló Catul and Sis Tek. Apart from these stated eight players, the team accounted for six midfielders and four forwards. Respective of their categories, these were: Henrý Talos, Daví Nod, Pequivi Ras, Val Torres, Artur Yonas, Inest Teng and Luí Gasapor, Paci Lester, Mika D'Angíel and Werst Bry. Of these, only Intest Teng and Werst Bry could say that they played in the national league. The rest played in either second division or third division, except for poor Mika, who played in the unprofessional college league. This didn't say much, as he had begun to spark interests amongst the technicians in the different teams which composed 'The' League. In honor of the national team, which was to return to the World Cup after a hiatus during the War of Golden Succession, they wore the same jerseys. The home jersey [Plate A] was gold, black and white - the colors of the flag -, while the away jersey [Plate B] was checkered with blue and white, with a gold stripe to continue representing 'The Golden Throne'. Both jerseys boasted a double-headed imperial eagle and the Empire's 'iron cross'.

http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i291/Macabees/TGTHome4.jpg
[Plate A; kit by Ediraf.]

The team had left Fedala, for Starblaydia's capital, three early mornings ago. Despite the time, their path had been found to be blocked by thousands of fans. It was truly unreal, given that this was the first U-21 tournament the Empire had ever agreed to fund a team for in the history of the Second Empire [not that said history is very long; eighteen years insofar]. However, the event had been widely publisized, since the administration had taken efforts post-war to 'educate' the population on the Empire's popularity abroad. This included attending international sports events, including the Di Bradini Cup and World Cup 41; not to mention, the Empire was co-hosting the Second International Futsal Tournament [SIFT] with The Gupta Dynasty [TGD; another random acronym just for fun!]. As a consequence, given the pounding by the media, these players found themselves to be famous extremely quickly. In fact, the Empire had gone far enough as to deploy four companies of 'guards infantry' to the area of assembly, as the team left on bus for the airport to fly to Starblaydia, in order to honor the team and offer it the Empire's 'best wishes'. On the other hand, it's important to understand that the team's improbability of victory had been extremely discussed on a multitude of national sports channels on the television, and even on the internet and on the radio [and whatever other channel of communication which may exist, really] - the Empire did not want to create false hopes. None the less, the average person seemed happy to support their team.

http://i75.photobucket.com/albums/i291/Macabees/TGTAway4.jpg
[Plate B; Again, this wonderful kit was provided by Ediraf/Starblaydia.]

Now, Mika found himself listening to his technician speak about their first foe. If he was to be honest with himself he couldn't deny the ecstacy he felt that moment as he thought about his first 'game day'. The coach was being blunt about Starblaydia and the team's infamous abilities, but Mika was more excited about meeting them in the 'field of battle', so to speak. Not everyone could share the field with a team as known as Starblaydia, and it would give Mika necessary experiences. He caught what the coach was saying halfway through the sentence, as the latter glared at him for day dreaming.

'... chance of victory.' The coach paused, sighed and said, 'Mika, listen up! This is serious! We need you to be completely ready for tomorrow. As I just mentioned, we have little chance of victory, and so we must be at our fullest. Let's not even leave this up to chance. But, let's be honest; we are not experienced, they are. Guys, take this first game as a stepping stone to improvement. If we lose to Starblaydia it will only increase our chances for victory against our next opponent.'

Saltavór Gertud, the defender, interjected rapidly, 'Who [i]is our next opponent?'

Derek Vadíern [the coach, remember!?!?] shrugged and a thinly veiled smile appeared on his face. He hadn't really looked at the schedule yet. 'Let me take a look, son.' He rummaged through some papers on the bench, inside the team's dressing room [they had been training that day], and said, 'Hmmm. Appears to be Candelaria And Marquez.' Everyone's stares were blank, and the coach chuckled, 'As my Castillian friend says, nisu.'

'Nisu, boss?' Salvatór seemed strangely interested in strange things.

'Ni su padre le conoze!' The coach laughed out loud and then translated, 'Not even his father knows him.'

Admittedly, it was likely that Candelaria And Marquez' players were mentioning the same thing about The Macabees, but that was how things went [especially for a team that hadn't really gotten to see the world much]. The dialogue continued to be relatively pointless that day; there wasn't much to talk about, after all. They would discuss specific game plans when they could, as they hadn't been devised just yet, but for now it was mostly 'pep talk' to try to get the 'boys' in the 'loosing mood', so that the probable defeat at the hands of the Starblaydi team wouldn't affect them too much. It was a sad reality, but reality nonetheless. Most accepted that this year's Di Bradini Cup only really served as a preparatory competition, whereas the next one the Macabee team could probably show up as a potential candidate as a close finalist. But for now, it hurt less to be pragmatic than to have hopes crushed and illusions dashed. That would be left for the World Cup! The so-called peop talked finished quickly, anyways, and the boys were allowed to go out for the night to test the Starblaydi night life.

As they showered and dressed back into their 'civilian garb' Werst Bry approached Mika, 'I bet you I'm going to score a goal in the game against Starblaydia.'

Mika rolled his eyes, 'Assuming we score at all?'

Werst laughed, 'If we score, it'll be by my foot.' The nineteen year-old player was not very humble, although his position as a 'league' player tended to provide some justification - well, at least it was justification to him. Werst was also cocky on the playing field, and that would probably show the first game. If any of the forwards was to get a yellow card it would be Werst, probably for debating with the referee when he had obviously committed a fowl upon the opposing player [these were particularly common for him - even expulsions].

D'Angíel snirked [he had his own touch of haughtiness], 'How much do you want to bet I'll be the one scoring, guy?'

'Dinner, bitch.'

The younger player smiled, nodded and responded, 'You got it.' With that, Werst turned around and left without even mentioning a 'good-bye', or something similar. Pequivi Ras approached Mika then, with a strange and unsure facial expression.

The midfielder said, 'Mika, I know Werst can incite people to compete with him, and you both really want to score tomorrow, but I'm sure that we'll preform better as a team if we work as a team. I think you can agree. We need to be at our best during the game with Starblaydia ... every game really ... and if both of you are competing against each other, this won't really help.'

Mika nodded, 'Don't worry about it, bro, I was just playing around. Scoring in general remains my priority.'

'Good to hear, man.' Pequivi smiled and shook Mika's hand and asked, 'You're going to the bar with us tonight, right? We're going to taste some of the beer they offer around here. It probably sucks, but what are we going to do, you know?' He let out one of those stoner, surfer kid laughs and then added, 'Yea brah, I hope to see you there.'

'Fo' sho', dawg.'

At least their attitudes radiated self-confidence and the ability to withstand the probable defeat. An attitude like this would be key for their games against the 'big players', as it would turn out a much better game if everyone kept their heads cool and avoid heated conflict with either the game's administration or the opposing players. But, by the looks of it, it seemed that this would be least of anybody's worries. What could be said with absolute certainty was that the Macabee National U-21 Team was about to make it's world debut and that no other team - no matter how good they were - could stop the Macabee 'boys' from doing the best they could. The U-21 Macabee team was sure to at least give a favorable impression for the next tournament, in regards to their ability to give it everything they had.

!Seongyeong and Samseong apply to be corporate sponsors of the tournament!

Questions concerning Cup of Harmony/Di Bradini Cup conflict:

I know that we are open to any kind of rosters with these competitions, so would there be an objection to my use of some of the same players in both tournaments, acting as if they are completely exclusive events taking part at different times?

Also, since both are going to go on at the same time, I think it's kinda silly to age the players a full four years, so is there again any objection if I just age them by one?

I know you are all very lax about this kinda stuff, though I do want to follow proper etiquette, that's why I am asking.

Thanks!

5th Di Bradini Cup Fujisawan Territories Roster
Starters are bolded
* indicates female
+4 style modifier

Head Coach: Shizuha Komine*
Assistant Head Coach: Sachie Jo*

Goalkeepers
2 Leo Kajiwara (Atezu Bay High School) Age: 16
4 Ki-sang Hin (Coastal Atsuzai High School) Age: 16
1 Tai Kodama* (University High School) Age: 15

Defenders
3 Benkei Na’akahara (University of Koshima (UK) Age: 20
22 Kita Yasuda* (Lesser Antilles University at Hoji (LAU-Hoji) Age: 21
21 Buncho Kate (University of Iwosaka (UI) Age: 21
16 Chitose Ienari* (Midway High School) Age: 15
10 Chiro Noma* (Half Moon Bay High School) Age: 15
13 Kanatsu Motokawa* (Hoji High School) Age: 16
17 Stanford Vincenzo Distefano-Honda (St. Mary’s) Age: 15

Midfielders
23 Ginko Kawaii* (University of Narasaka (UN) Age: 21
5 Deanna Distefano* (Friendship Catholic Academy) Age: 18
20 Kenzan Go (University of Koshima (UK) Age: 21
19 Kin Doi* (Ienari High School) Age: 15
15 Changu Kamachi (Merchant Park High School) Age: 14
12 Evangelina Sheree Spence* (Hoji High School) Age: 15
6 Hyong Ochimen (Akino Kawa High School) Age: 15

Forwards
14 Shojiro Takemago (Midland Interisland University (MIU) Age: 19
7 Kay Distefano-Honda* (Friendship Catholic Academy) Age: 16
8 Akeno Sassa (Hoji High School) Age: 16
18 Bianca Graciela Distefano-Honda* (Friendship Catholic Academy) Age: 14
9 Nikki Lo* (Hoji Metropolitan High School) Age: 14
11 Saionji Kajahara (Gongazani High School) Age: 15

Notes:
1. Since the 4th Di Bradini Cup, voters in the Fujisawan Territories approved full scale immigration and now that the borders have been opened, Evangelina Sheree Spence represents the first immigrant athlete on an international Territories roster.

2. Jotaro Komine was promoted from U21 head coach to the head coach for the Fujisawan Territories' senior side after leading the Fujisawan Territories to the 4th Di Bradini Cup final. Komine's niece, Shizuha Komine (also a World Cup 39 player) has been named the new U21 head coach. Sachie Jo (older sister of 4th Di Bradini Cup player Sakura Jo) has been named as assistant head coach.

3. Chitose Ienari is the niece of the Fujisawan Territories' Prime Minister Sanami Ienari and cousin of World Cup 40 player Kinuko Ienari. Yes...it's all about connections.

Imperial U-21 Squad (ages not limited for simplicity, but rest assured they are all under 21!)

Player ㅇ韓ㅇ ㅇ한ㅇ # POS
Yi Jeongyeol 李正烈 이정열 1 K
Ju Sigyeong 周時經 주시경 2 D
Bae Yongjun 裵勇俊 배용준 3 D
Baek Namjun 白南準 백남준 4 D
Yi Beomsuk 李範奭 이범석 5 D
No Jeongyun 盧廷潤 노정윤 6 M
An Changho 安昌浩 안창호 7 M
Shin Hyeiseong 申彗星 신혜성 8 M
Son Daeho 孫大鎬 손대호 9 M
Pak Gyuseon 朴圭善 박규선 10 F
Yi Eunju 李恩宙 이은주 11 F
Yi Haeung 李昰應 이하응 12 K
Yi Suyeong 李秀英 이수영 13 D
Son Yeijin 孫藝珍 손예진 14 D
Wang Dong 王栋ㅇ 왕동ㅇ 15 M
Mun Hyeonyeop 門峴曄 문현엽 16 M
Seol Gihyeon 薛琦鉉 설기현 17 F
Yang Gyuseong 楊圭腥 양규성 18 K
Kim Yongji 金永智 김용지 19 D
Yang Manchun 楊萬春 양만춘 20 D
An Yeonghak 安英學 안영학 21 M
Kim Sungweon 金順權 김순권 22 M
Kim Mihyeon 金美賢 김미현 23 F

Coach Yu Giheung [유기흥]
We're also bringing back the ex-convict stick whackers as an official "coach of great inspiration".

Playing Style: +2

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes
Godmod injuries to my players: Yes
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: no
Godmod Other Events: Yes

Nevermind the fact that these are the same 17- to 20- year old kids who participated in the last two tournaments... :D

The Imperial Youth Squad will also be sporting snazzy new kits made by Taegwang:

http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/daehanjeiguk/kit-youth.png

ooc: kits are all original handwork; no, I'm not in the business of making kits, because they take a lot of time to make, and I really don't like using MS Paint anyway...

Questions concerning Cup of Harmony/Di Bradini Cup conflict:

I know that we are open to any kind of rosters with these competitions, so would there be an objection to my use of some of the same players in both tournaments, acting as if they are completely exclusive events taking part at different times?

Also, since both are going to go on at the same time, I think it's kinda silly to age the players a full four years, so is there again any objection if I just age them by one?

I know you are all very lax about this kinda stuff, though I do want to follow proper etiquette, that's why I am asking.

Thanks!

ooc: I personally age every player one year per WC season - since it nearly perfectly matches my standard Han calendar (60 RL days = 1 Han year) I wouldn't object, and I don't think anyone else should, especially the people who havve 10000000000000000000 year-old players masquerading as tots on wheels.

Jeruselem's "we grabbed some army kids from somewhere" team

Coach: Major Hilary Clipon
Formation: +3 (3-4-3)

Goalkeepers
GK (F) - Louise Cuddlebugs, 15 - Army supply truck driver.
GK (M) - Ray White, 16 - Trainee army mechanic

Defenders
DEF (F) - Sadie Dallas, 17 - Daughter of Rashina Dallas. A secretary. Avoids the artillery range like the plague. CAPTAIN
DEF (M) - Yos Fiddlestein, 16 - Cleans tank guns
DEF (F) - Sarah Flik, 18 - Works in the stables
DEF (M) - Bonza Borgky, 19 - Trainee cook
DEF (F) - Christine Cross, 18 - Radar operator

Midfield
MID (F) - Yonk Hipyer, 20 - Warehouse storeperson
MID (M) - Hans Muckslopper, 16 - Trainee engineer
MID (F) - Raylenne Bitsmon, 18 - Trainee communications officer
MID (M) - Meif Inglepop, 17 - Trainee doctor
MID (F) - Tawnee Fundough, 17 - Trainee explosives engineer
MID (M) - Yaps Nobranz, 18 - Mine clearer

Strikers
STR (M) - Dirk Hardtop, 16 - Public relations clerk
STR (F) - Stacey Keiber, 15 - Drives officers around the place
STR (M) - Flatt Tarmack, 17 - Road engineer
STR (F) - Nuwwar Cossan, 17 - Trainee logistics officer
STR (M) - Shawar Habib, 20 - Artillery engineer

KLVE Print Edition
5th Di Bradini Cup Preview

The Fujisawan Territories went all the way to the final during an improbable journey of faith in the 4th Di Bradini Cup. But now, new faces will define the destiny of the Territories’ team this time around.

Gone is Sakura Jo, the deaf goalkeeper who inspired her teammates and the nation. Jo moved to Newmanistan to join the Southport Tigers and attend university. In her place is Leo Kajiwara of Atezu Bay

Kimiko Hasegawa is in the Territorial Air Superiority Force as a Toyoshima Run TR171 (http://saintb.proboards78.com/index.cgi?board=aircraft&action=display&thread=24) fighter pilot based out of Asneel.

Head coach Jotaro Komine was promoted to head coach of the senior side when Stephen R. Distefano took a voluntary demotion. Komine’s niece Shizuha, a World Cup 39 player, took Jotaro Komine’s place.

All four of World Cup 39 and 40 head coach Stephen Distefano’s kids are on the team. Daughters Kay and Bianca, and son Stanford Vincenzo, join Deanna.

Prime Minister Sanami Ienari’s niece Chitose is trying to repeat cousin Kinuko’s success.

The Territories team will have to adjust to a new coaching staff, the loss of Jo, and the high expectations placed upon them as second place finishers in the 4th Di Bradini Cup final. Newmanistan, the reigning champions have been drawn in Group C with the Fujisawan Territories. It seems the odds of the Fujisawan Territories doing as well as they did last time around are slim.

Shizuha Komine has the same mind set, the same tenacity and determination as her uncle. Having been a player with World Cup experience (albeit qualifying round experience), she has the resume for the job. And she takes her coaching cues from Jotaro Komine. It remains to be seen wether or not she can repeat Jotaro’s performance, but it seems on the surface as though this is a much more solid team.

It took a lot of courage as a team to travel to Starblaydia as unknowns and emerge as runners up, beating previous champions Candelaria And Marquez in the semifinal on the way to the title match. Perhaps the previous team paved the way for continued success with this team, but in all actuality, it will be much harder for the Territories in this edition than the last.

With Jo in Newmanistan, the team will have to find someone to rally behind, someone to motivate them at their lowest points. Jo was and still is an inspirational figure and will most likely define an entire generation of Territorial zeokit players as time goes on.

This is not a team rebuilding. It’s simply a team with a lot of talent in redirection. For as many questions as there are, we’ll soon be getting answers. Until then, we’ll all be on the edge of our seats in the Territories.

OOC: Roster coming soon. I'm just too busy with a national league of my own.

Questions concerning Cup of Harmony/Di Bradini Cup conflict:

I know that we are open to any kind of rosters with these competitions, so would there be an objection to my use of some of the same players in both tournaments, acting as if they are completely exclusive events taking part at different times?

Also, since both are going to go on at the same time, I think it's kinda silly to age the players a full four years, so is there again any objection if I just age them by one?

I know you are all very lax about this kinda stuff, though I do want to follow proper etiquette, that's why I am asking.

Thanks!

The wonders of NS fluid time mean that, in your timeline, you can be attending this Cup whenever you like. I'm pitching it as a Pre-WC41 type tournament, probably just before the BoF for WC41 - and perhaps two or three years after WC40/CoH32.

My U21s will actually age 5 years since the last DBC, what with the early DBC4 to take account of the BoF I was hosting. for what it's worth, a little comparison timeline thing.

Di Bradini Cup 4 - 97 years AF (After Football)
Oriental Football Cup 4 - 98 years
Turtle Cup - 99 years
AOCAF22 - 100 years
WC40 - 100 years
Di Bradini Cup 5 - 102 years

The simple answer is yes, RL they're at the same time, but ICly they can be years apart.

I wouldn't object, and I don't think anyone else should, especially the people who havve 10000000000000000000 year-old players masquerading as tots on wheels.


Which is precisely why this is now the Di Bradini Memorial Cup, I think 119 was old enough for anyone.

(OOC: Have decided to age players by 2)

Team Nickname: “The Rockets”

Home/Away/Alternate

http://i271.photobucket.com/albums/jj156/newmanistan/NEW40.png

If my opponent RP’s first they may:

Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod scoring events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes, but just to the extent of saying so and so was injured. I’ll determine the severity.
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out red cards to my players: Yes, but no more then 1 per game.
Godmod other events: TG your idea for approval first. No deaths/stadium damage.

Note: Players with DB4 in ( ) are people that played in that championship for both my reference and in case others wish to refer to it.

Preferred formation: 4-3-3

Manager: Brian Carson (DB4)
Age: 45
Background: In his 10th season as manager of the Pocono City Capitals, he also played his entire career there as a striker, and is the all time club leader in most offensive categories. As manager, he has led the Capitals to three championships. Considered a tactical master, he was chosen for the national job because the Empire knows we will be seeing opponents for the first time, and has the faith in Carson over any one else to be the one that can catch on to their tendencies and make the appropriate adjustments. He is a player’s manager, and does a great job keeping his cool, and won’t let his anger show as he feels that demoralizes the team. Carson also led the Rockets to the 4th Di Bradini Cup championship and returning.

Assistant Coach- Chris Merrill- Merrill is the head coach of the Dover City Mountaineers and gives Carson valuable insight. They work well together.

Here are the starting eleven:

*** IN GOAL ***

Name: Corey Hennis (DB4)
Position: GK
Age: 20
Number: 81
Club Team: Springfield Thoroughbreds
Background: After leading the Rockets in goal to the Di Bradini Cup 4 championship, Hennis looks to repeat his performance once again. Since we last saw him, he has matured quite a bit and is a little smarter now to the moves of the attackers. However, you may remember him (if you were really, really paying attention) as having played for Pocono City as his club team before. Well, he was recently acquired by Springfield in a trade since Pocono City’s main keeper, Kevin Dalton, doesn’t plan on retiring anytime soon.

*** THE DEFENDERS ***

Name: Jeremy Brooker (DB4)
Position: LB
Age: 21
Number: 5
Club Team: Dunboor FC (Cafundeu)
Background: Brooker’s rise to becoming one of the world’s most promising defenders came to fruition when he was signed by one of the world’s top club teams in Dunboor FC in Cafundeu. Brooker remains just barely eligible for this competition, and his experience in last Di Bradini Cup, World Cup 40 qualifying, and Baptism of Fire should make him one of the best players in this entire tournament. Cafundeu’s in the group, you say? That should be fun!

Name: Tony Borsinger (DB4)
Position: LCB
Age: 21
Number: 6
Club Team: Tundra Falls Mariners
Background: Borsinger is the definition of a defensive defender. He never gets caught up in the attack, and is admired for his ability to read plays before they happen at such a young age. Despite an impressive physical stature though, critics feel that Tony is a little too soft at times. He rarely gets carded, and some feel he needs to play with more of a killer instinct. Borsinger, also a spiritual leader, emerged as a starting defender for the Rockets in World Cup 40 qualifying effort as well.

Name: Steve Secrist (DB4)
Position: RCB
Age: 20
Number: 4
Club Team: FC Depardenti (Nethertopia)
Background: Secrist has always been compared to Jeremy Brooker as young talented defenders making their way up the ranks, so it’s probably no coincidence that Secrist has also found his home on an overseas team. He’s not quite as physical as Brooker, just your prototypical young defender who’s solid in his own end. He will join the rush, at times.

Name: Michael Harrison (DB4 as a reserve - never played)
Position: RCB
Age: 19
Number: 8
Club Team: Pocono City Capitals
Background: Harrison moves up from reserve in the last cup to full time starting duty in this cup. He was acquired by the Capitals from Springfield in the same deal that sent Corey Hennis to Springfield, and now has the chance to play for his hometown. He doesn’t have a very intimidating physical stature, but that is very misleading, because he is a very aggressive player, and not afraid to mix things up.

***** MIDFIELDERS *****

Name: Alex Parnett (DB4 as a reserve - never played)
Position: LM
Age: 18
Number: 10
Club Team: Tenderville United (Nethertopia)
Background: Ever since he was 11 years old, Parnett has been hailed as the next big thing in Newmanistan. He has amazing ball control skills, an excellent shot, size, and is also strong defensively. So when he got away at 17 to Nethertopia, it was what really made the NSL decide to change up some rules, and make the conversion to the NPL. Keep an eye on this kid, he should be a great one, and should want to make the most of this opportunity to represent his home country.

Name: Dale Stevens
Position: CM
Age: 18
Number: 24
Club Team: Portsmouth Whalers
Background: A two way midfielder, Stevens has a powerful kick and is able to score goals, but his versatility makes him most valuable to the team. He is not afraid of the rough stuff, and can be an intimidating presence in the middle of the pitch. He’s generally a smart player, but can be somewhat inconsistent.

Name: Alex Warrick (Warrick is presently under a team imposed suspension and not playing. Matt Caufield starts in this spot until I remove this notation. Warrick will be a reserve, and Rafferty is a substitute for as long as you see this notation.)
Position: RM
Age: 18
Number:27
Club Team: Dover City Mountaineers
Background: Making his first appearance at the international level, Warrick has exceeded his expectations, and is also poised to fill the loss of Brett Prescott in Dover City. Warrick is a businesslike player when its time to play, but off the pitch still has some issues. Despite being just 18, he has already fathered three children. (Though he denies two of them).

*** STRIKERS ***

Name: Jeremy McAllister “J-Mac” (DB4) **** TEAM CAPTAIN ****
Position: LS
Age: 21
Number: 20
Club Team: Putnam Lake Eagles
Background: J-Mac is back, and unfortunately for the rest of the competing nations, he remains just eligible to participate in this Cup. McAllister has become a recognizable name on the world scene, and he was the leading goalscorer in the entire Di Bradini Cup 4 competition. He was then among the goal leaders in the Baptism of Fire, and had a strong World Cup Qualifying effort and Cup of Harmony. He’s a very flashy player and loves attention, but has really become inspired by his brief time in knowing Simeone Di Bradini, and it has helped him become a complete player, as well as true leader.

Name: Shawn Drummond (DB4)
Position: ST
Age: 21
Number: 11
Club Team: Springfield Thoroughbreds
Background: McAllister and Drummond working together is a thing of beauty for the Newmanistanian. Their blinding speed (sub 4.20 40-yard times) and ball handling skills are very exciting to watch, as long as your rooting for them and not the opponent. They worked it very well in the last Cup, and look to do it again here. Drummond is a bit more raw and slightly more prone to a mistake, but that won’t happen to much.


Name: Jennifer Vilardi
Position: RS
Age: 16
Number: 15
Club Team: Fairfield City Admirals
Background: Jennifer is honored to be the first female named to a starting position, and at such a young age, this has really come as a shock to some people. But both her, and her twin sister Shannon (substitute) are on the team and ready to score goals. Jennifer has a great finishing touch, and actually enjoys getting physical with any defender. (No, not like that, geez!)

**** SUBSTITUTES ****

Name: Kurt Allwine
Position: GK
Age: 17
Number: 1
Club Team: Tundra Falls Mariners
Background: This may have been the most eye-opening addition to the team, because last year’s backup goalkeeper, Chris Kusler, would still be eligible to play for the team. But Allwine has flown through the ranks so quickly, Brian Carson opted to go with him, to play under Hennis, and perhaps be able to assume the starting role in the 6th Di Bradini Cup.

Name: Brent Treichler (DB4 as a sub as well)
Position: CB
Age: 21
Number: 3
Team: Southport Tigers
Background: Once again, Treichler returns to the team as a very capable substitute. Some may have been surprised that Harrison got the nod over him, but coach Carson seems to like using Brent as a reserve, and the defender accepts the role. Tall, and physical, he is also very emotional, though he has improved his consistency.

Name: Sheldon Talcott
Position: CB
Age: 16
Number: 18
Team: Loudon Leopards
Background: Sheldon is a defender with a bright future, who on this team is probably best compared to Steve Secrist. He’s not an overimposing defender, but he does all right, and is still growing his physique, too. He has very good awareness for his age, and is a clean player. Perhaps, a little too clean. He’ll have to work on that to not be viewed as a pushover during his career.

Name: Matt Caufield (DB4 as a starter)
Position: MID
Age: 20
Number: 9
Club Team: Tundra Falls Mariners
Background: Because he is somewhat undersized, everyone passed up on Caufield originally, and Tundra Falls got him at a very cheap price. Through hard work, he has used that as a chip on his shoulder and become a great player. He is coming off an injury plagued season, though, and due to this, he slips on the depth chart, from a starter in the last cup, to a substitute here.

Name: Shannon Vilardi
Position: ST
Age: 16
Number: 14
Club Team: South Charlotte Condors
Background: Shannon is much like her twin sister, Jennifer, who is a starter. What was said about Jennifer also applies to Shannon. The twins should be exciting to watch, and they are very excited about representing the Empire together!

**** RESERVES ****

Name: Chris Phillips
Position: CB
Age: 18
Number: 7
Club Team: North Charlotte Wildcats
Background: Phillips is a tall, defensive defender. He will make the safe play on every opportunity, and sees the play very well in front of him. He’s pretty smart to the moves of forwards, and won’t back down from physical contact.



Name: John Owens
Position: MID
Age: 21
Number: 25
Club Team: Hastings Crusaders
Background: Despite being 21, Owens was not a member of the DiBradini 4 team. He’s been a bit of late bloomer, but has gradually developed himself as an outstanding defensive midfielder. If and when his number gets called in a match, it will likely be in a tight game situation with the Rockets needing to protect a lead late.

Name: Brian Rafferty (DB4 as starter)
Position: MID
Age: 21
Number: 28
Club Team: South Tier Seagulls
Background: You may remember Rafferty as a key contributor to the Rockets Di Bradini 4 championship as a starting midfielder. So what’s happened to him? Well since that Cup, he was arrested for assault in a bar fight where he severely beat another person that got him three months in jail, then later he was charged with a DWI. In the last year, he has tried to clean up his act, and has done a good job of it. Brian Carson debated whether or not to include him because of this but felt a player with his talent should be part of a team, however he will not start, but may see time (on the field, not in a cell) somewhere.

Name: Kyle Carrigan
Position: ST
Age: 15
Number: 19
Club Team: None, but rights are owned by Olympia Gladiators
Background: Carrigan is the younger brother of Kevin Carrigan, who participated in the World Cup qualifying and corresponding events. Kyle has a lot of the same attributes, and has been named to the team so he can get a taste of international competition. Brian Carson absolutely loves Kevin Carrigan, so this addition may not be too much of a surprise. Expect Kyle to be simply be watching, and soaking in the experience, and only be used in the event of an emergency.

Candelaria And Marquez National Under-21 Football Squad for the Fifth Di Bradini Cup

The Republic of Candelaria And Marquez is the prima–

Oh, you know by now. Just look in the CoH thread if yer desperate…


Permissions: TG me for anything truly outlandish, otherwise do whatever makes you happy.


Squad:

Manager: Following in the respectively slightly-less-illustrious-than-he-used-to-be, slightly-more-illustrious-than-he-used-to-be and just-starting-out-on-the-road-to-illustriosity-really footsteps of Lloyd Donnelly, Adam Williamson and Andy Le Lan, comes Jerry Huntick.

“Who?”

The problem is that while government funds have been poured into the CMSC like there’s no tomorrow, the CAMAFA have been left cash-strapped. You’d think even so that taking arguably the third most important job in the entire country after the President and manager of the senior football team would prove a role with real cachet, but the problem is that the DBC falls right in the middle of the domestic season, and the CAMAFA simply can’t afford to buy anyone good out of their contracts, even temporarily. Hopefully by DB6 that problem will be sorted, and the under-21s will have a man in place months before the tournament, but for now they’ve had to turn to Huntick.

A true veteran, Huntick spent most of his managerial career with KT Hotspur. Success over his dozenish seasons in charge was minimal, in truth, but Huntick dealt manfully with the chaos in the boardroom and delivered a couple of CMS Cups – the second coming from his final game in charge. Following the victory, and with concerns over the condition of his heart and a certain amount of wife-based naggery over the matter, Huntick moved upstairs, but he has clearly been kicking his heels ever since. He insists though that this will be his final outing.

Huntick has typically played a mind-numbingly defence side over the years, but he’s shown himself capable of adapting to the players available. Certainly this C&M side’s attack looks rather better than its defence, but quite what he intends to do with it is anyone’s guess. It’ll probably be 4-4-2, but we don’t know that for sure. Equally, his choice of personnel could be anything, though with a massive five group games he’ll surely rotate alot anyhow.

The C&M press predicts an initial starting XI of Santamaria – Wangen, Knight, Christmas, Mendoza – De’Ath, González, Ely, Mills – Federici and Richardson, but that really is only a shot in the dark.


Goalkeepers:

1. Stefan Santamaria, Aged 20, Albrecht FC
Regarded dramatically as “the future”, Santamaria is still yet to make a first-team appearance for the Scorpions but is well-regarded as a reliable, commanding shot-stopper. He is also a competent outfield player and could find himself in the heart of the midfield if the Small Blues suffer an injury crisis in Starblaydia.

13. Will Poole, 20, Abiodun North
While Leon Fluck was over in Starblaydia with the under-21s, Abiodun’s third-choice ‘keeper Poole was busy impressing… including in a 1-0 cup defeat to Huntick’s Spur. Since then Poole has forced Fluck out of their second division side and impressed greatly with his massive reach and on-field leadership.

23. Peppi Elduayén, 19, Beersheba United [Jeruselem]
Whut? Okay, back-up there sparky. A girl? A girl goalkeeper? After what happened last time? Are you sure?! The first female player in any C&M national team since the ill-fated Imogen Dacosta in the Justantina Cup; Peppi is an athletic, pig-tailed little wotzit and the first of a bunch of female Candelariasian talents sent off to the JPL to learn from the masters, or mistresses presumably, of the female game three years ago, to come through into the under-21 side. Yup, she’s been in Jeruselem for three years. You can write your own captions, really.

Defenders:

2. Arthur Wangen, 19, Northpoint Sealions , [b]Right-back
A very solid player who won’t be going beyond the half-way line in a hurry, Wangen is none the less perfectly comfortable in possession and has quickly established himself on the Sealions’ first team.

14. Arthur Walker, 21, Port of Clotaire, Right-back
Two right-backs called Arthur? Two rights-backs called Arthur Wa–? Is that a global first? Though the elder player, Walker may have to play second fiddle to Wangen given Huntick’s predilection for defenders that can be counted upon to actually defend, but the Harpies star has impressed greatly going forwards for an otherwise tentative PoC outfit this year, and has been keeping the much more experienced Ben George out of the side.

5. Agamemnon Knight, 21, KT Hotspur, Centre-back, Captain
A protégé of Huntick’s, it’s no surprise that Knight takes the armband. It’s hard to say whether his performances really merit inclusion though, for though he’s strong and quick he’s also not especially good at this whole defending lark. Alongside five others defenders in Thomas Larson’s ghastly Spur side of the moment his failings are masked, but don’t expect Santamaria to be keeping too many clean sheets with this kind of ‘talent’ on offer.

6. Hansson Kemp, 19, Radyukevich, Centre-back
Oh gods, it just gets worse. The utter dearth in quality centre-halves is shown up by Kemp’s inclusion, as a player who’s been performing on loan for third division Maidment SC of late, and looks far away from ever claiming a first-team spot for the top-flight Jukos. Still, he’s tall. That’s got to count for summat, right?

12. Caleb Christmas, 21, Cathedral City, Centre-back
Ooh, this is a bit more like it. A key part of Catedral’s recent unexpected success, Christmas is extremely solid performer – and, though smaller than his likely defensive team-mates, he also offers options from set pieces and otherwise going forwards. Off-pitch, if he doesn’t manage to be the subject of at least one kiss-and-tell while in Starblaydia there’ll be a public inquest in the Candelariasian tabloids.

3. Grey Mendoza, 19, Caires Sports, Left-back
*Bump* Yes, we fall back down to earth now, with no less than two left-backs drawn from the second division. To be fair, there’s a whole host of lefties at CMSC clubs just a little too old or a little too young for this DBC, but for the here and now Mendoza is the best we’re going to get, clearly. A skinny lad best pushing forwards, but totally untested at this level.

20. God’s Power Adekunde, 20, Albrecht Independent, Left/Centre-back
The first player from the capital’s number three club to wear C&M colours, Adekunde is an extremely large boy, in all departments frankly, who is equally comfortable either on the left or in the middle of the defence. Although that doesn’t actually signify that’s he’s any good, you understand.

Midfielders:

7. Peter De’Ath, 21, AFC Neegara [Kura-Pelland], Right/Central Midfielder
No flying winger this lad, De’Ath is on loan in Vircais from Albrecht. Principally a wide man, though he can play just about anywhere; it really is his versatility that makes him attractive to managers. And only his versatility. And the silly surname, that’s always a bonus.

14. Niv Cohen, 19, AFC MN Smith, Right Winger
The rather more exciting option on the right, Cohen got his shot for the Smudgers after injury to the expected first-teamer, and promptly scored on his debut. His supreme confidence, coupled with unerring accuracy both for the back of the net and the position of his team-mates has led him to score six times so far this season and rack up any numbers of assists. The Smith would be long gone without him, and the Small Blues could yet find themselves in the same position.

8. Ryan Edwards, 21, Albrecht FC, Attacking Midfielder
The battle between Edwards, Bevaart and González for a starting spot is going to be massive, but many believe that big Ben’s little brother may have the edge after a series of superb performances for the table-topping Scorpions. Andy Le Lan gives him the freedom to do pretty much whatever he likes, and his runs are invariably timed to perfection. He could probably do with finding the back of the net more often, but he has the strength and poise to set up his team-mates with almost tedious repetition.

21. Jon Bevaart, 21, AFC Neegara [Kura-Pelland], Attacking Midfielder
Technically very assured on the ball and possessing a lashing shot, Bevaart looked set to be Port of Clotaire’s present and future until he broke his pelvis on his senior debut (as you do). Since then he’s moved to Neegara where he’s playing well. Probably. Who knows? Huntick probably only picked him ‘cos it’s fashionable to select those earning their trade overseas.

22. Jamie González, 21, Arrigo Portuguese, Attacking/Left/Right Midfielder
An attacking midfielder or striker who can play on the right, left or up the middle; González is an indispensable player for his club and still labours under the tag of C&M’s Next Big Thing. No great pace, but he can cover a lot of ground with his long-legged, loping style and can deliver balls with pinpoint accuracy.

4. Tom Ely, 20, C.A.L, Central Midfielder
The second division-based Ely gets in ahead of his twin brother at Gamboa, and will fight it out for the vital defensive midfield spot. A big – though by no means physically strong – but athletic player, he’ll likely be the link between O-fence and DE-fence.

16. Lloyd Carpenter, 20, Green Island, Holding Midfielder
Physically strong as he needs to be with a simple but highly effective range of passing. He’s barely played this season though, what with Ben Head being the GIZ’s first-choice in that role, but he’s clearly one for the future.

11. Gary Mills, 19, FC DePardenti [Nethertopia], Left Winger
Whereas many of the current generation of Candelariasian lefties are all tricks, Mills is an extremely quick touchline hogger. One of the youngest and least experienced players in the squad, he could well find himself thrown into the deep end, given Kortsarian’s injury concerns. Veel geluk!

17. Aaron Kortsarian, 20, KT Hotspur, Left Winger
One of the breakout players of the DB4, Kortsarian has quickly carved out a reputation at home and abroad for his ability when cutting inside from the left flank, beating his opponent with a trick, and delivering a pass or shoot on goal. After an injury-hit season for the Spur, his Director of Football Development, Huntick, may take it easy with the lad, but the temptation to stick him in the side out here from the off may be too great.

Forwards:

9. Jason Federici, 20, Port of Clotaire, Striker
A true goal poacher, though capable of the cleverest of runs – particularly at this level – Federici fell just short of emulating his predecessor as the Small Blues’ vital frontman, Joe Cunningham, in leading his side to the Cup. A not-especially inspiring tally of league goals this season suggests that the Candelariasian press may be right to treat this particular edition of the Di Bradini with trepidation, but he’s still surely going to be a guaranteed starter.

10. Cas Richardson, 19, Gamboa FC, Forward
Big, posh Casper Richardson has arguably been the revelation of the CMSC so far this season. His impressive height was always going to give him an advantage, but no-one really expected him to break into his club’s first team this year, never mind score ten in seventeen. High-quality feet for a large chap and good with the ol’ knock downs, he may prove the perfect partner for Federici.

18. Kian Donnelly, 21, Albrecht FC, Striker
Grandson of himself, Kian is by some distance the most surprising selection in this squad. With Cunningham suspended he had an excellent game up front for the Scorpions right before the CMSC went on its mid-season hiatus and appears to have got in largely on the strength of that, but he’s been nothing more than a sub for Albrecht for quite some time. No longer as all arms and legs as he proved during modest loan periods earlier in his career, but he’s still hardly the prettiest player to watch. He could yet prove C&M’s surprise package, though.

19. Guillermo Ibarra, 18, FC DePardenti [Nethertopia], Forward
Mills’ compatriot in Nethertopia, Ibarra is a big ol’ midget whose goal tally will never be overly impressive, but who had a real talent for getting other players into the game and an instinctive awareness of the options arrayed behind his back while he drives on forward. Apparently.


Kit:

The Small Blues will be debuing the flash new C&M ediraf outfits in the opener against kenavt.

http://i176.photobucket.com/albums/w175/candelariaandmarquez/CAMHome4.jpg http://i176.photobucket.com/albums/w175/candelariaandmarquez/CAMAway4.jpg

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: No
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: Yes, though no brakes or tears.
Godmod injuries to my players: Yes, see above.
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: no
Godmod Other Events: Yes

Official Press Release in Gwaines Highly Touted PennDel Post
First International Tournament in Gwaine History
By: Mike Barcann

In the days before Edward M. Snyder III took office no one knew anything of the country Gwaine, we were pure isolationists. But in just one year we have over one million immigrants, thirty embassies in our country, and forty of ours are across the world. But today the lesser known sport of soccer or futbol will be the star and not Hockey, or Football.
The 5th Di Brandini Cup held in Starblaydia is for teams from all across with players under the age of 21. Ever since the announcement it was unknown if we were compete, but last month when the Groups were announced for the tournament our country was right there, Group B the other teams in our group are from the countries of Fmjphoenix, Daehanjeiguk, Pablicosta, Milchama, Taeshan. Now I'll be the first to admit I don't know much about these teams, but if the way our people sent them away for their 22 hour flight we can atleast give our group members a run for their money.
Here is the first ever roster of Gwaines Di Brandini Cup Team:

Head Coach: Phil Garber Age 68
(Major League Record (Interim): 2-3-1)
(Amateur/High School Record: 351-40-9 15 Nation Championships)
'Garbs' as he is known by the kids, has been coaching at Rallington High for the past forty years amassing an unheard of record of 351-40-9. He came to his alma mater at the age of 28 after coaching for the Green City Birds of Prey in the now defunct MSA. After receiving offers from other leagues, he decided to teach the sport to teenagers hoping they can make a difference. He was nominated as the head coach for Gwaines team after it was announced his star Mid-Fielder Johnathan Rone was to play for the team.

Asst Head Coach: Matthew Buck Age 29
He has coached with Coach Garber for the past six years, and is expected to be his replacement at the start of the next season.

Formation: (4-3-3)

(Starters Bolded)
* -designates captain

Goalkeepers
GK (F) - Grace Williams, 17 - Senior at Wellsborguh High. Has a record of 14-2
Strengths: Sees the field well, incredible speed, and anticipation.
Weaknesses: 2nd year as a goalie, gets emotional after allowing a goal.
GK (M) - Samuel Williams , 16 - Brother of Grace, Junior at Wellsborgh High, has a record of 21-3.
Strengths: Great speed, Hands, Incredible leg power, Incredible Hustle.
Weaknesses: Plays to conservatively, has never won a playoff game, composure is questionable.

Defenders
DEF (F) - *Lisa Ray, 20 - Youngest female to ever reach the major league level at the age of 17. (5 Career Goals, 4 Assists)
Stengths: Breakneck Speed, not afraid to get dirty and play physical.
Weaknesses: Coming off of a concussion
DEF (M) - Louie Mareno, 14 - Youngest player on the team, shattered little league records, and his school records in only year as a freshman.
Strengths: Great leg strength.
Weaknesses: Young, doesn't play with his brain or instinct.
DEF (F) - Olesya Remenksy, 18 - The first Major League foreigner in the history of Gwaine, she combines natural beauty with killer ability.
Strengths: Fastest Defense on team (4.1 40), Plays like a forward (16 Goals)
Weaknesses: Blows her coverages, Tends to be a bit of a showboat.
DEF (M) - Greg Tracksin, 20 - Former player for Coach Garber, started at defense this year for the Champion Wellsborguh Tigers in his Freshman year as a Major Leaguer.
Strengths: Killer Instinct, Amazing Slide Tackle, Small and Agile
Weaknesses: To small to play defense, bad backstep.

DEF/MID/STR (M) - Markis Rudinsky, 19 - Tried out for the team and made all three cuts, never played soccer before.
Stengths: Just an all-around top knotch athlete.
Weaknesses: Never played organized soccer before, at risk to be carded.

Midfield
MID (F) - Jessica Rivers, 15 - Set the single season record for assists for East River High and one away from Gwaine all-time record (24).
Strengths: Top-Knotch speed, Bullseye Passing accuracy.
Weaknesses: Always passes the ball, rarely takes a shot even with an opening. Afraid of contact.
MID (M) - *Johnathan Rone, 16 - All-time leading scorer in High School history for Gwaine in 3 years (42 Goals (6 Hat tricks), 38 assists). Has already accepted an offer from a Major League team.
Strengths: Deadly accuracy, Plays entire game, Amazing leadership on and off field. Not afraid to make the play, or pass it to a teammate. Comes up big in the clutch (25 Goals GW or Tying).
Weaknesses: Unknown composure around big time media.
MID (M) - Rick Moralis, 17 - Starting Midfielder for his school.
Strengths: Plays great defensive Midfield.
Weaknesses: Doesn't always play til the whistle, gives up plays to easy.
MID (F) - Melanie Roberts, 19 - Daughter of Hall of Famer Mickey Roberts. Used to play soccer but plays professional basketball now.
Strengths: Uses speed to make plays, has excellent acceleration.
Weaknesses: Hasn't played soccer for 2 years, always under her dads shadow
MID (M) - Gregory Ramis, 18 - Plays a nice offensive Center Field.
Strengths: Plays pretty good offense.
Weaknesses: Plays strictly offense rarely pursues the ball.

Strikers
STR (M) - *Stefan Skirpak, 16 - Great Charisma, always in a cheery mood.
Strengths: Great gameday knowledge, trusts his abilities and limits.
Weaknesses: First time ever in high-pressure situations.
STR (F) - Jennifer Laurner, 15 - First time starter at Striker for her school last year, recorded eight goals and four assists.
Strengths: Doesn't get along with teammates often.
STR (M) - Benji Rollings, 20 - Former first overall pick in the majors and only recorded one goal in his three year career.
Strengths: Well placed accuracy, major league experience, great ball handling ,Playing with a chip on his shoulder and wants to prove he's as good as he thought he was.
Weaknesses: Still considered a bust, Never played well in Majors.
STR (F) - Madeline Gretz, 17 - Fastest female in her school with a great leg to put in it the net.
Strengths: 3.91 40, great kicker and ball handler.
Weaknesses: Poor accuracy, takes to many shots.
STR (M) - JOhann Ramirez, 20 - Minor League baseball player.
Strengths: Breakneck speed, nice passing abilities.
Weaknesses: Hasn't played soccer in four years, never a shot taker.

TEAM ANALYSIS
Incredibly Fast team with proven leaders on all sides of field. The defense while not as fast as the mid or strikers can score goals and force the ball away from the offense. The goalies a brother/sister duo is relatively unproven but always have big game potential, and ability for games to come.

OOC: For those who RP first my goalkeepers are set-up as follows:
1: Samuel
2: Samuel
3: Grace
4: Samuel
5: Grace

From the Offices of the VSC does the Marauder information come

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events Y
RP injuries to my players Y (be reasonable)
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players N
Godmod Other Events Y

Playing Style: Moderately Offensive

Uniforms

http://i25.photobucket.com/albums/c58/Krytenia/ESF39.png

Home Alternate

Manager

Roki Sardan
Age: 20,918
He's retained despite his poor performance last tournament, mainly because no one else dares to take the job.

Assistant

Orophin Anárion
Age: 24,563
A Vyinta native who has earned his way up the ranks from a mere scout to where he is today. He is a very sound motivator and provides the friend in the braintrust that the squad needs in order to thrive.

Keeper

56 Julius Rewi, Lea Monde
Age - 19
Sex - M
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 173 lbs
Country of Origin: Assegai Developments
A young Assegain who has good reflexes and is a good judge of the ball on crosses. His lack of expierence could be his downfall though.

Defenders

38 Danen Lika, Square Haven
Age - 20
Sex - F
Height: 5'9"
Weight: 152 lbs
Country of Origin: Assegai Developments
Agile and detirmined, she knows how to best her marker in any number of fashions. She also likes to come up the wing and support the attack when they have sustained pressure.

39 Stephias Deadleaf, Wexax Academy
Age - 19
Sex - M
Height: 6'1"
Weight: 167 lbs
Country of Origin: Elves Security Forces
Quick, strong, and very calm is the best way to describe Strephias. He should be a rock in the back that brings together the back line into a cohesive force.

30 Elrond Elensar, Straightdale
Age - 20
Sex - M
Height: 6'2"
Weight: 181 lbs
Country of Origin: Elves Security Forces
Not particularly strong in any suit like Lika or Deadlead, Elensar is more of a "Jack of all trades" type defender. He gets the job done efficiently, even if he not particularly pretty doing so.

Midfielders

27 Ceine Jurangil, Ibinni
Age - 19
Sex - M
Height: 6'3"
Weight: 170 lbs
Country of Origin: Vyinta
A strong prescence on the ball who has the ability to carve through defences like a hot knife through butter. Playing on the streets in Vyinta has given the lad a more gritty approach to the game, but his results speak for themselves.

10 Ecante Redias, Valanari Academy
Age - 21
Sex - M
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 149 lbs
Country of Origin: Assegai Developments
Not overly quick, or the best of crossers, but Ecante constantly puts in the effort and time on the pitch improving his game so that Roki believes enough in him to let him get the starting nod.

11 Hara Thial, Night Academy
Age - 20
Sex - F
Height: 5'7"
Weight: 129 lbs
Country of Origin: Elves Security Forces
Unlike Ecante, Hara is an absolute masterful crosser, and will likely be recieving many balls out wide to send those pinpoint crosses in and hopefully to many goals.

4 Celebriän Ar-Feiniel, Raynor City
Age - 20
Sex - F
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 158 lbs
Country of Origin: Elves Security Forces
With her wicked left foot and dazzling dribbling ability, Ar-Feiniel gets to show the world what she can do. Her shot is deceptively powerful and highly accurate, causing even the most tested keepers fits from her long range bombardment.

7 Tathar Súrion, Viella
Age - 19
Sex - M
Height: 6'4"
Weight: 188 lbs
Country of Origin: Turruth Gordur
The usual enforcer on any squad he gets called up to, Tather is built for the possessive game. Able to hold off most of his oppenents with his sheer size, his stregnth allows him to do so against those with better technique as well. He lacks much in the way of accuracy when it comes to shooting however, but is quality all the same.

Forwards

9 Valaria Love, Rinaldi Academy
Age - 21
Sex - F
Height: 5'11"
Weight: 139 lbs
Country of Origin: Elves Security Forces
With here and Soler having had the expierence of starting last tournament, it will be up to these two leading ladies to find the back of the net and often. Without the conversion by the strikers, the powerful midfield will all be for not, and I look for Love and Soler to both step up.

12 Calla Soler, Soldarian FC
Age - 21
Sex - F
Height: 5'10"
Weight: 146 lbs
Country of Origin: Elves Security Forces
The daughter of the only foriegn manager to ever lead the Marauder, Calla has been groomed for years by the country and her father for this. Genetics, natural skill, years of pratice, and great teaching have her propped up to be the next great striker in the ESF, with this as her springboard to stardom.

Reserves
GK 17 Fëanáro Ciryatan, age 19, Hartdale (M)
CB 42 Daeron Srion, age 18, Wexax (M)
CB 37 Fingolfin Séregon, age 17, Baysleef (M)
LRM 20 Lora Do'Urden, age 21, Melikkiaz (F)
RM 26 Taikinu de Juavi, age 19, Juavi (M)
MC 20 Alexander Travian, age 20, Square Haven (M)
MC 33 Nicole Delara, age 18, Viella (F)
AMC 16 Finwë Celebrindal, age 17, Rinaldi (M)
ST 19 Findecáno Meneldur, age 20, Char Sara (M)
FC 14 Kalathi Strise, age 21, Ispan (F)

Rewi
Lika Deadleaf Elensar
Thial Jurangil Súrion Redias
Ar-Feiniel
Love Soler

Captain: Calla Soler
Left Corner: Hara Thial
Right Corner: Hara Thial
Set Pieces: Calla Soler
Penalty Taker: Valaria Love

THE ROCKET REPORT

FROM UNDERDOGS TO ONE OF THE FAVORITES

Starblaydia- Is this how far we’ve come in such a short span of time? Who can forget the 4th Di Bradini Cup, when Newmanistan made the global debut in the football world. No one knew anything about the Empire then, and when they were initially placed into a group with the likes of Jeruselem and Sorthern Northland, no one really paid much attention to us. The Group would come down to Jeruselem, Popay, and Sorthern Northland. Krytenia was in the group too. If there was a spoiler to the top three, surely it would be Krytenia. Newmanistan? Who heard of that place? It didn’t matter, really, they would just be the team that everyone ran up the score against to increase their goal differential advantage as well as they could when they rolled all over this unknown.

But someone forgot to tell the people wearing the sky blue and white. It started with a win over Sorthern Northland. Nah, that was just a fluke people thought. After all, the Northerners had a difficult time with their flight and had to sleep in an airport before the match. Then Jeruselem, and the Rockets win by three. Still a fluke, but upgraded to “spoiler’ status. After all, a major event happened to a Jeruselem icon the day before the game, and the players were distracted, as they were saddened by the unfortunate news. Newmanistan wasn’t “good”, they were just “opportunistic”, thought many. But the Rockets were coming together as a unit and gaining confidence, especially after those two victories. Then a narrow escape over Popay and a win over Krytenia finished an unblemished group stage and Newmanistan was now certainly noticed by the other nations. Onto the knockout stages, wins over Daehanjeiguk and again over Sorthern Northland sent the Rockets to the final, a final against the Fujisawan Territories, that no one could have expected when the Di Bradini Cup started. Not just because the Rockets were an unexpected finalist, but so to, were the Territories. Two classic underdogs went at it in a spirited contest, with just a lone goal, by the Rockets, allowing Newmanistan to capture the Cup.

So here we are now. The stage is the same, but the circumstances are oh, so different. Everyone knows who Newmanistan is now. There will be no sneaking up on anyone. But as the defending champion, they will now have the target on their back as the team everyone will want to knock off. It’s a role that we have complete confidence that the Rockets will be able to handle, as they are bringing back several key players from that squad, and should actually be a better team then they were last time out. Also different, is that Simeone Di Bradini himself is no longer with us. This is the first Cup named in his honor since his passing, and he will be on the thoughts of many people involved in the tournament, not just Starblaydis and Newmanistanians, but many more. It may make for a more emotional tournament, and you can bet that Starblaydia in particular, will be a very inspired team to win the Cup in his honor.

We begin Di Bradini Cup 5 in just a few short days. We’ve made our predictions and know what we think will happen. But still, there are 24 clubs out there vying for this coveted title. Sure the Rockets are excited about playing Valanora, and Cafundeu, and even the Fujisawan Territories are in our group. Bazalonia is also a solid contender. In fact, we really feel that Group C is the “Group of Death”. But Newmanistan will not just be up for those clubs. Ofedestan, you better be ready, too. Because if there is any team in this tournament that knows any one of these 24 clubs can win the Di Bradini Cup, it would be Newmanistan. One Cup ago, Newmanistan was the Ofedestan, the team that had no experience at this level, none whatsoever. It did not stop the Rockets. They went for it and they won it. They know the Ofedestans, or in other groups, the United Hetzels, Kenavt, and Pablicosta can go on the same run in this Cup, using us as their model. That’s what makes the Di Bradini Cup such a great competition. But make no mistake, Newmanistan wants to repeat. And they will do whatever it takes, taking no one lightly.

FOOTBALL FEDERATION OF BLOUMANY

The Football Federation of Bloumany (FFB) wishes to advise all interested parties that the final roster for the 5th Di Bradini Cup has been finalised.

Manager: Jack Copper Currently team manager for the Northport Sealions who have won the Wedrom Premier league title 3 of the past five years and won the last 2 Wedrom Association of Football (WAF) trophy. Copper continues as manager of the U21 Blouman Empire International Team (The Eaglets) following on from the 4th Di Bradini Cup.
Assistant Managers: John Longlegs, Allan Peterson, George Prowler
Physio: Dr. Luke Monday

Goalkeepers

#1. Alex Burner (Captain)
Age: 20
Position: GK
Club: Lincoln Park
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: Son of legendary goalkeeper and current Blouman international player Henry Burner. Alex has proven that he has inherited his fathers genes and is a very strong keeper his flying saves are his best quality able to bound in front of goal saving shots from on the opposite side of the frame, played well in the previous Di Bradini Cup.


#23. Henry Jackson
Age: 21
Position: GK
Club: Port Fansat
U21 International Caps: 0

#31. Norman Norman Jr
Age: 19
Position: GK
Club: Forest City
U21 International Caps: 0

Defenders

#2. Johnathon Cooper
Age: 29
Position: CD
Club: Malloca
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: strong defender he is fast and can close down on players, man marking is also a strong suit with him. Won best and fairest U21 player in the Holchmain Championship league and won Best and fairest in U21 Blouman Empire tournament.

#3. Andrew Pollard
Age: 21
Position: CD
Club: Broome Utd
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: Andrew is an excellent defender able to close down forwards and places in strong tackles making strikers feel utter useless, sections of the media have claimed him to be the best defender out of North Braxon since the legendary Ben 'Tank' Koltard.


#4. Rt. Hon. Johnathon Milken
Age: 17
Position: LB
Club: Waterford Athletic
U21 International Caps: 0
Short Bio: A strong left back with good defending abilities and is very fast. He is new to the top flight of football, having only being discovered by Waterford scouts when he was 16, he has been quick to impress many critics having played well in the Waterford reserves and a star player in the recent U21 Blouman Empire tournament playing for Braxon.

#5. Richard Moaninton (Vice Captain)
Age: 21
Position: RB
Club: Jollip Province Athletic
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: Has excellent defending abilities, a player who can stave off attacks down the right wing, he has prior international experience being on the Blouman World Cup 39 and 40 team and 4th Di-Bradini Cup team.

#41. Adam Jones
Age: 21
Position: CD
Club: Memorial Drive
U21 International Caps: 0

#37. Christopher Moreton
Age: 21
Position: LCD
Club: Southcastle
U21 International Caps: 0

#25 Steven Hodgens
Age: 18
Position: RB
Club: Pointevin
U21 International Caps: 0

Midfielders

#6 James Sleep
Age: 19
Position: RCM
Club: FC Middelton
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: Strong midfield usually plays in the centre but can just as easily play on the right side and can move up and down the field with ease, he is the fittest player on the team. Performed well in 4th Di Bradini Cup.


#7. Ross Millsop
Age: 21
Position: LCM
Club: Clackridge
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: Midfielder who can play the left side well and can cross a shallow ball very well, produced excellent crosses for the forward line in the previous U21 tournament

#8. Christopher Moreton
Age: 20
Position: CAM
Club: Braxon City F.C
U21 International Caps: 6
Short Bio: Strong player who wowed crowds at the recent Blouman Empire U21 Tournament playing for Braxon, a regular starter for his clubs first team and plays the Central Attacking position well.

#30. Ahron Ferdinard
Age: 21
Position: CAM
Club: Nickson Wanderers
U21 International Caps: 0

#20. Kane Nomad
Age: 19
Position: LCM
Club: Princesforest
U21 International Caps: 0

#35. Johnathon Kovac
Age: 20
Position: RM
Club: Romford
U21 International Caps: 0

#49. Thomas d'gran
Age: 21
Position: CM
Club: Travellers Pass
U21 International Caps: 0

#91. Luke Clottings
Age: 17
Position: CM
Club: Northport
U21 International Caps: 0

Forwards

#9. Christopher Speed
Age: 20
Position: CF
Club: Jollipville Athletic
U21 International Caps: 6
Short bio: Teen prodigy fast, excellent shot, plays the centre forward position well, began playing for his team in their top team at the age of 16 years and 5 days and is the youngest player in 101 years to debut at this level, loved by the media due him playing with the ball well and can produce goals from the most unlikely of position he has improved his skills since in both the 39th and 40th World Cup qualifiers, 31st and 32nd Cup of Harmony as well as playing in the 4th Di-Bradini Cup. He has won the Tonning Medal (League best and fairest) for the past five years and the FFB regular Medal (Empire wide best and fairest in league games) twice. He is a teenage heartthrob and is cited for the reason why their has been a 150% increase of females attending Jollipville Athletic games.

#15. Issac Golding
Age: 20
Postion: ST
Club: Tollingbrough
U21 International Caps: 1
Short Bio: Excellent striker who can find openings in the goal where others can't. He won the best up and coming player in the Fraycrant Football Federation Medal in his debut year at the age of 18, and for the Grand Final of the recent U21 Blouman Empire Tournament was named Best on field.

#11 Aesop
Age: 21
Position: ST
Club: Coonawarra
U21 International Caps: 0
Short Bio: Good striker, able to befuddle defenders with his excellent foot skills. Won the Golden Boot at the recent U21 Blouman Empire Tournament

#10. Shane Taylor
Age: 17
Position: ST
Club: Koorna Hill
U21 International Caps: 0

#28. Edward Bean
Age: 20
Position: ST
Club: Down by the lake near St Sebastian's F.C
U21 International Caps: 0

Uniform

Home Uniform: Shirt, Red horizontal band on top and bottom quarter, thin royal blue horizontal band underneath top red band, thin green horizontal band above bottom red band and in the middle a gold horizontal band. Shorts, Black with thick white stripe down either side. Socks, Red
Away Uniform: Shirt, White. Shorts, Black with thick white stripe down either side. Socks, Royal Blue

Style Modifier: +2
Formation: 4-3-1-2
Those which have a short bio are starters.

My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod scoring events Y
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out red cards to my players N
Godmod other events Y (within reason TG me if you want something major)

<Press Conference>

On the podium is Head of the FFB Sir Kenneth Kings, Manager Jack Copper and Captain Alex Burner.

Kings: Welcome distinguished members of the media, I am pleased to announce that the roster for the 5th Di-Bradini Cup has been finalised. And I am confident that with this team, not only will we be as good as the last time this cup was held where we were undefeated in the group stage and were unlucky to lose the quarter final, but we will go better this time around. I now present to you a respected member of Blouman football, manager of the Eaglets Mr. Jack Copper.

Copper: Thank you Sir Kenneth, Ladies and Gentlemen last year we had played marvellous, yes we lost out in the quarter final but, during the group stage the boys could do no wrong. This time around I am confident despite a slightly different team due to age restrictions that we will perform better than any other international team from Bloumany. In this team we have six new players that are joining our ranks. The Right Honourable Johnathon Milken, Steven Hodgens, Luke Clottings, Aesop, Shane Taylor and Edward Bean. (As he reads out the list they each come out in stage in full uniform and stand from right to left, next to Jack Copper), these boys are some the greatest players that we have here in the Empire, and are fine additions to the squad. Issac Golding has also been moved from the bench and will now be a regular starter, he will add good strength to our forward line.

I would also like today to announce the Captain and Vice Captain for our team who will lead out the rest of the players with the pride of Bloumany behind them. First up our new Captain who will be speaking shortly Alex Burner, and our Vice Captain Richard Moaninton. Both of these players exhibit strong leadership skills and have played on an international level before, Alex in the 4th Di Bradini cup and Richard in both the 39th and 40th World Cup qualifiers, the 31st and 32nd Cups of Harmony and in the 4th Di Bradini Cup. I know that both of them will be able to lead the team both on and off the field and will be excellent role models for the rest of our players. I know this team can perform and I will be expecting them to perform during this up coming tournament I know that we will go further this time than the last. And now Ladies and Gentlemen I present to you our new Captain Alex Burner.
(The players who had been standing walk backstage)

Burner: Thank you Jack, I am pleased to have been appointed by the coaching team as Captain of the Eaglets and I am ready to take all responsibility for the team, and I know that I will perform this duty to the best of my ability. Being a part of the team at the 4th Cup I was disappointed that we fell out at the quarter final after going through the group stage undefeated, it was a bad moment for me, I do not want that happening again and I along with the rest of the team will fight better to bring home our first international silverware, it is a matter of pride for myself and the my other teammates who played with me last time. We have a strong team this year and I know we can play well. Thank you.

Kings: Thank you Alex, now are there any questions for us.

(Various people shout out at once, as what normally happens in situations like this the one with the louder voice wins)

Reporter 1: Yes Mr. Copper, due to the age restrictions you lost both Martin Fox and Johnathon Rhodes and Ben Millsop, both Fox and Rhodes started every game and produced excellent goals, do you think that your Forward line is ruined now these two strong players are no longer able to play?

Copper: Hmm yes I can see why some people may think that, those three players were good players and indeed Fox and Rhodes are on the International team, but we have Golding who is an excellent player and managed to get a goal at the last Di Bradini cup during his only appearance, and I know that he will be a strong striker, Aesop is also an excellent striker and will be able to comfortably get the goals we need. So no I think our forward line is as strong as ever.

Reporter 2: Baron Konjac was dismissed at the end of the 32nd Cup of Harmony, will you consider taking up the position as manager for the International team?

Copper: Look that is a decision for the FFB to decide, and it is not something I want to be brought into. My job is to win this Di Bradini Cup.

Reporter 3: Mr. Copper you appointed Alex as Captain over Richard who was Vice Captain last year, yet you didn't promote him he has had more international experience and is even Captain for the U21 Truingren side, why wasn't he appointed Captain?

Copper: Look Richard is a good player and he does have good leadership skills, however experience isn't the only thing that decides if you will become Captain there are many other qualities including leadership skill and respect by the other players

Reporter 3: Are you saying the other players don't respect Richard?

Copper: No I am not saying that at all all the players respect Richard and look up to him, I am saying that there is a wide variety of things we take into account and we weigh and add them up and we appoint the player we think is most suited to the job, in this case it was Alex, I can assure you Richard was a very close second.

Reporter 4: Sir Kenneth, Have you imposed a minimum requirement on the team to reach this tournament?

Kings: To win it ha ha no, we don't put requirements on our teams, we expect them to play to the best of their abilities.

(There are a few stifled laughs and mummers from the media as they know otherwise)

Kings: Well if there are no more questions then I thank you all for coming today, if you wish you can ask any further question by sending it to the FFB press office, and now ladies and gentlemen there are refreshments through the door to your left. Once again thank you for coming.

Assegain Today
Five Questions for the DBC

1) Why has Roki Sardan been retained?

A: No other manager inside the Commonwealth wanted to deal with the disadvantages the squad has. With the different aging methods, playing with a majority squad of elves, gives our oppisition a clear advantage.

2) Will Calla Soler capitalize on her skill?

A: That depends on whether or not the midfield can provide her with enough quality oppurtunities. As seen with her time on Soldarian's roster, if she is given service, she will finish off the oppurtunity more often than not.

3) Should Valanora even be in the competition?

A: Depends on who you ask, but I think they should. It gives a good expierence for the youth of the four nations, and has even the youngsters oppurtunities to get signed, see Totez with his Yafor club.

4) If the mini Marauders are to once again be a force in the competition, what needs to happen?

A: First, Sardan needs to actually manage the game. Last tournament he just sends the kids out there and told them to play, and the results speak for themselves. The next thing is that the midfield needs to do a good job in keeping possession and linking up with the two talented strikers. The best defence is a good offence I always say. Finally, the keeper needs to make the timely saves when called upon, something that nearly all the keepers have not done in any of the previous four editions.

5) Who will advance out of the group, and who will win the competition?

A: My best is on Valanora and Newmanistan coming out of our group. We have the history and motivation, while the Newmans won the last tournament. To me, that speaks volumes about the quality of the sides and should give them an edge over the rest of the group. I see the Purple Peril finally lifting the trophy this edition. With the death of the footballer for whom this tournament is name, it will give them a passion and banner to rally for and spirit them onto a title.

Article by Cricst Icani

This is the roster for the fifth Di Brandini Cup. Or shall i Say 5th Di Brandini Memorial cup.

GK Isaac Newton #43 18
LD Chuck the Duck #7 18
CD Alan Pearsin #77 18
RD Rickys Meyerse #11 18
Rm Axe Lewis #8 18
Rcm Jake Del Rio #33 18
Lcm Zack the Geek #17
LM Myan Inca #4 18
LS Alan Gregory #42 18
CS Damian Aslott #23 18
RS Ricky Zellefrow #14 18

Subs
GK Argentin Royal #2 18
D Zeke Rogers #3 18
M Steve Komen #44 18
S Theo Aztec #5 18

Coach Lyran Stategos

A few notes. This team has been together since the first Di Brandini Cup. Weve had 4 attempts at this cup.(we missed the 2nd) We age slowly in taeshan.

Jerseys_ Supplied by Ediraf
http:i292photobucket.com/Alblums/mm1/starblayde/TaeAway.jpg
http:i292photobucket.com/Alblums/mm1/starblayde/TaeHome.jpg

Style Modifier-1

The National Reporter Online>News with a View
Are we screwed, do you suppose?

Iain Miller writes. “So come on then, cards on the table. Who d’you think’s gunna win?”

“Honest…? Em ell pee, mate. I mean, I can’t stand that Morton bint or anythin’…”

“Nah, ‘course. But at least we’ll know where our rupees are going, eh? Won’t be handin’ ‘em out willy and indeed nilly to yer poofs and yer towelheads jus’ so’s we can all be ‘socially equal’, eh?”

“Heh, yeah…”

“Yeah. Not that, y’know, I’ve got anything against yer basic, y’know, poof.”

“Nah, ‘course. Or yer, y’know, rag ‘eds or that.”

“Nah, ‘course, ‘course. Fine upstandin’ members of the community.”

“Yeah. Enriching.”

“Enriching, absolutely. Couldn’t’ve put it better meself. Still… Better vote for the chick, I reckon.”

“Yeah. Not the black chick, though?”

“Nah, ‘course. Not ‘cos she’s…”

“Nah, ‘course not. Nah. I just, y’know, like Morton’s policies on, um, compulsory Pacitalian classes at secondary schools.”

“Yeah, sure. And, um, I’m quite keen on protecting the indigenous tree-shrew an’ all.”

“Yeah.”

“Yeah.”

Yes, for the first time in what seems like the age of an unnaturally prolonged dog, the primary topic of conversation in every public house, caf and natty little bistro has swerved away from football. It shouldn’t be the case, really, not when we’re in this midst of an entertaining title race, not when the second Champions’ Cup is just around the corner. Not when the World Cup finals are till in full throw, not when we’ve still got a great chance in the Cup of Harmony. And certainly not when the Fifth Di Bradini Cup is about to start.

Despite missing the first edition of the tournament (well, we like to arrive fashionably late to any new socio-cultural development), the Candelarias have since taken up the DBC with almost unparalled enthusiasm. Taking a step back from it, the fact remains that back-to-back titles followed by a third-place finish after a semi-final defeat on penalties is an astonishing record. C&M have played twenty-eight competitive games at under-21 level and, over ninety minutes, have lost twice. No-one in the world can match statistics like that. Possibly no-one ever.

But for once, the Di Bradini Cup has coincided with a brief national tryst with Reality. In less than two weeks – assuming the online voting technology doesn’t go Montgomery Wong – C&M may very well have a new government. The implications for football could, potentially, be massive – but for May only, the Candelariasian people have other things to worry about. About C&M’s place in the international community. About the proper procedures of criminal justice. About immigration, about tax and spending power, about drug use and multiculturalism, about the state of the roads and the local school and the future of the humble Candelarian tree-shrew. It won’t last long, but Jerry Huntick and the CAMAFA will have to accept that for once the Di Bradini Cup must take a back seat.

Let’s be honest here though; a big part of the problem is that we don’t reckon we’ve got a tree-shrew’s chance in hell of winning this one. Granted, we never do. But this time we’ve surely got every reason to think this way.

The primary problem is that the CAMAFA, in their finite wisdom, decided to appoint this Cup’s coach two freakin’ weeks ago. And we cannot escape the nagging notion that Jerry Huntick has simply no idea what he’s doing here, or how he’s possibly going to compete with this set of players. The general consensus in the press is that he’s picked more or less the right squad, that’s the worrying thing.

You could make a case for KT Hotspur’s young Ryan Gonzaléz maybe getting a go in goal for example – particularly when the third-choice ‘keeper is a certain Peppi Elduayén. Her involvement at least didn’t take us by surprise this time, since the CAMAFA have been trumpeting their half-dozen girls learning… all sorts of things, probably, over in Jeruselem, but the fact still remains that since Beersheba United reserve matches haven’t been picked up by TTO Sport this year, so we’ve no idea if this is just another PC publicity stunt by the powers that be, or if she’s actually any good. Frankly, we probably won’t find out in this tournament either, if Stefan Santamaria lives up to his promise and Will Poole continues his development.

Parochial club fans have made other claims – that Caires City’s Alex San should be in over the unknown Arthur Wangen they sold to a Blouman club in the summer, that Mayo Valley’s James Meakin or Turks’ Club’s Ishmael Dolphin should’ve got a shot out on the left. Carlos Benali’s been scoring for fun lately, Joel Mercado’s got more talent in his little finger than Lloyd Carpenter’ll ever have, Kevin Ely and George Jones have both been doing it consistently for Gamboa… But basically, when all’s said and done, Huntick’s twenty-three barely diverges from what you or I would have gone for.

The suspicion remains however that this squad just isn’t very good. It’s hard to compare directly, given their ages, but we first won this tournament with Ben Young and Mars Douyadari at the back, and then with Jari Virta and Demario Ortiz. How can you possibly tally that up with Caleb Christmas and Agamemnon Knight? Özkan Yalçin, José Luis Sosa, hell, even Alex Duxbury, versus Grey Mendoza at left-back? Matteo Corradini in the centre of the park, or Connor Mengucci, versus Tom Ely? It doesn’t look great, does it? Three of our younger players almost pulled us to victory two years ago, but have Jason Federici, Jamie González and Aaron Kortsarian really trained on sufficiently?

Me personally, I think this pessimism is misplaced in the extreme. Okay, the defence is poor; but who better than a defensive mastermind like Huntick to whip them into shape? And who among you can honestly claim that you’re not excited by the future prospects of Niv Cohen, Ryan Edwards and Guillermo Ibarra? Sure, this squad’s got dead wood, but haven’t they all? What have Dave Walsh, Ryan Gnom, Carroll Eriksson, Robbie Shannon, Reuben Fattori or Archer French really achieved in their careers? And these guys helped us win two titles, let’s not forget.

No, this is a perfectly good squad. It’s not our twenty-three players in Starblaydia we have to worry about; it’s the five-hundred-and-twenty-nine-or-so others. As Huntick himself has readily conceded, the Memorial Cup should be the most hotly contested DBC yet. Of the twenty-four teams we should expect at least three quarters to be competitive, and while Group A is clearly not the toughest, there’s still plenty to worry about – especially with six countries contesting two knock-out spots.

The Starblaydi hosts stand out at first glance, and the young Perils have been nothing if not consistent at this level, with a semi-final finish in the inaugural competition being followed by three straight quarter-finals. The pressure of playing at home has clearly got to them at times – and after the death of Di Bradini himself and the early exit of the senior side from the World Cup that pressure will be all the greater – but the fact remains that over ninety minutes we’ve never actually beaten them in the three games played in under-21 and senior competition over the years.

Despite that, they can hardly be considered a real rival – not like Jeruselem. While that rivalry is hardly played on a level playing field – at senior level at least, with one point garnered from four games – these countries under-21 sides are old foes. Following the defeat in the Justantina Cup final, they met a ridiculous three times in the 3DBC, with the Small Blues taking a win and a draw in the group stage… before that stunning 5-3 semi-final victory. But ultimately the past counts for little, not when the players and coaches involved are completely different. We can’t even claim any inside knowledge courtesy of Señorita Elduayén, with the opposition offering what effectively amounts to a Jeru FC youth XI.

Given that the first games of a tournament are invariably cagey, it’s a blow we’ve got kenavt first. They’re likely to be the worst side in this competition by quite a distance, but Huntick’s boys and girl will have hardly got up to speed when they get underway against the Stornoway outfit. Lovisa could also prove spoilers, for while we’ve never lost to them at anything they do have a nasty new tradition of denying us in the final reckoning…

And the Macabees? Nope, no idea either. Except that my more learned colleagues inform me that the Empire of the Golden Throne have been about in international sport for a distressingly long time, and scouting reports suggest that there’s no reason why they can’t hope to be the fourth debuting nation to win the DBC in five editions.

A huge plus however is that the Di Bradini Cup’s format means that there are effectively two separate competitions until the final. That means the sides to emergence from our group will be kept apart from the nightmarish Group C – which, for the record, contains the reigning champions, the last runners-ups, two-time finalists, two-time semi-finals, and the BazaCubs an’ all. Ofdestan are going to be eaten, poor buggers. We instead could find ourselves facing – and probably beating, let’s be honest – more old foes like Taeshan or Milchama. The return to under-21 football of the legendary Effemjayphoenix promises much, but the real worries are the Han. This squad are now on their third DBC – surely their time is now?

But let’s be honest, it hardly matters. The Newmanistanian kids are going to follow our lead and win the title again at a canter. Me, I’m more concerned about the tree-shrews.

After the first nights stay in Starblaydia there was a press conference for Gwaines Captains Jonathan Rone (JR), Lisa Ray (LR), Stefan Skirpak (SS) as well as Coach Garbs (CG).

Press #1: This is for any of you to answer, but how is your stay in Starblaydia going?

LR: Well we only arrived 18 hours ago so we haven't been able to explore the city yet, but the hotel we are in is beautiful.

JR: It definitely beats Wellington in so many ways, the people here have also been very helpful and supportive.

Press #2: Coach, looking in your group alot of these teams have played in international tournaments before and this one will be your first how does it feel?

CG: Well we have all been seeing tapes of our competitors and they look to be competition. I never make any promises on wins but I will promise we will still try our hardest and prove not to be a complete pushover in this tournament. There have been alot of great upsets in the past, but who knows what can happen, it's win or go home at this point.

Press #3: What have you guys done to stay in shape and condition yourself for this type of enviroment?

SS: When I was called by coach I was very appalled by the fact he wanted me to play for the team, let alone be a Captain. But I was working out with a personal trainer, and mostly built up more leg strength.

LR: The season wasn't half over when my coach told me I would be representing our nation. After the season I personally went over to the other captains and worked out with them, helped them their techniques and how to deal with a crowd.

JR: I was with Coach, and we did alot of one on one work about a year ago. I also had some help from Olesya and Lisa during the summer. I try to stay fit throughout the year, never know when soccer will pop up on ya.

Press #4: With the younger players missing school how do you plan to capitalize on schoolwork?

CG: We have two private tutors traveling with us, to teach them on an even level. Also Lisa and my assistant both are qualified teachers so they can always help should someone be struggling. We also have in place the rule where they can't play if they don't do any work, its a sacrifice but education is one of Gwaines best assets. Thank you for your time, this will be all for today.

CCFM RELEASES ANOTHER LIST OF UNKNOWN PLAYERS
TO PLAY ANOTHER U-21 COMPETITION

Once again, Cafundéu will participate in the U-21 Di Bradini Cup, hoping this time to make a good performance, unlike the one of the last Di Bradini Cup.The coach is now the young Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

Style: Very Offensive

Here is the list of 23 players (number-name [age, team, rating]):

Use the BOLDED names

Goalkeepers:

1- Lazlo Vercilo SALATHIËL (20, Agreman FH, B)
12- Geraldo Alameda Vicenza "GERALDÃO" (20, CR Submiria, C)
22- Bruno Meniz "PERU" (19, Sambarilove, B)

Full-Backs:

2- CÍCERO Bandrindes Rossi (21, Cafundó do Juta, A)
6- RENILDO Carvalho Peixoto (21, Petardos S/A, A)
14- ROGÉRIO Flores do Campo (18, Galáxia, B)
16- PLATÃO Nunes (20, Metropolitano, C)

Defenders:

3- Michel Cunha Abidiniz "JAPA" (18, Faculdade de Medicina, B)
4- Herman Joss "MONTANHA" (20, Ranca Toco, B)
13- John Gusmão "GRILO" (18, Clube Imperial, C)
21- Leonardo Gusmão "BARBA" (20, Clube Comercial, B)

Defensive Midfielders:

5- Jamil Luário Francis "JANUÁRIO" (20, Sambarilove, B)
11- Fágner Monza de ABREU (20, A.F.F., A)
15- Fábio Germano Santos "FABINHO" (19, Central United, B)
20- Charles JULES (19, Sambarilove, C)

Offensive Midfielders:

8- TÚLIO Silvério (19, Sambarilove, A)
17- Reginaldo ROSSI (21, Penders, B)
19- Fernando MARQUES (17, SC Lasft, B)
23- Raúl Barbosa "RAULZITO" (20, Cafundó do Juta, C)

Attackers:

7- Dênis Conte ALVES (18, Dunboor FC, A)
9- Gilberto LACERDA (19, Galáxia, A)
10- HUBERT Munch (21, CR Submiria, A)
18- Fernando Maiorini Schomad "NANDO" (18, Central United, C)

Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga

Formation:

------------------------------Salathiël------------------------------
-----Cícero-------------Japa-------------Montanha------Renildo-----
------------------Januário-----------------Abreu--------------------
--------------------------------Túlio--------------------------------
----------Hubert---------------Alves---------------Lacerda---------

Kits (home-away-third):

http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/CafHome4.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/CafAway4.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/CafThird4.jpg

The unaclaimed Newspaper

Di Brandini Cup draw is announced

Wow we are screwed the Purple Knights U21 team drew the Han. And Milchama. Others include newcomers Gwaine, old formor national nation Fmjphoenix, and Pablicosta It is expected to be a tough test for the Future stars of the national team.

The Ofedestan Occurence
Di Bradini Roster Released

Our roster for our first bid for the Di Bradini cup has been released after some selections. Bios later.

#1- Dwayne Jenkins - GOALIE

#2- Rick McGiffert - LEFT BACK
#3- Gunther 'The Gun' Schmidt - CENTER BACK (C)
#4- Zane Ferguson - RIGHT BACK

#5- John Whyte - LEFT MID
#6- Iunavic Melianic - CENTER MID
#7- Pete Tigsby - RIGHT MID

#8- Dan Wright - LEFT WING
#9- Lloyd Jefferson - LEFT FORWARD
#10- Ben Harper - RIGHT FORWARD
#11- Eric Hughes - RIGHT WING


#12- Urio Tenda - GOALIE SUB
#13- David Carpenter - BACK SUB
#14- Jack Fletcher - MID SUB
#15- Simon Burgess - WING SUB
#16- Murray Price - FORWARD SUB

My opponent, if they RP first, can do the following-

Choose my goalscorers- Yes
Godmode scoring events - Yes
RP injuries to my players- Nothing major like broken bones or paralysis, but Yes
Godmod injuries to my players - No
Hand out yellow cards to my players - Yes
Hand out red cards to my players- 1 per game maximum.
Godmod other events - within reason.

OFS

OOC: The next person to refer to this tournament as the 'Di Brandini Cup' will have their RP bonus reset. A single typo is fine, but repeated disrespect to the late Mister Di Bradini (note the spelling, kids) will be punished by laps around the stadium!

OOC: The next person to refer to this tournament as the 'Di Brandini Cup' will have their RP bonus reset. A single typo is fine, but repeated disrespect to the late Mister Di Bradini (note the spelling, kids) will be punished by laps around the stadium!

OOC: I hope it's not me. *Checks* Shit, sorry about that Starblaydia, please accept my humblest apologies. *Does ten laps around the oval*

ROCKETS PAY RESPECTS TO LEGEND

(OOC: I realize there is an assumption made here that Simeone Di Bradini was buried and not cremated or something like that, so if this assumption was wrong I apologize)

Setting: The burial grounds where Simeone Di Bradini rests

Carson: Ok everyone, this is important to many of us. We come here not as Starbladyis but as football players, and to pay respects to a man that helped pave the way for the growing of international football.

(The players walk towards the gravesite, and surround it)

McAllister: Thank you Simeone. Thank you for making me a better player, and a better person. You are in a better place now, and I know you are happy. I just want you to know that your influence extends far beyond Starblaydia. What you have done for me, even if it may have seemed very small on that one day we were able to talk after we won the Cup, is something that will be with me forever.

Brooker: Thank you Simeone. Thank you for being a pioneer of opening up opportunities for football players not just from Starblaydia, but from all over the world. You had a vision that people from all over the world, no matter where they were, could come together and play this great game that we all know and love.

J Vilardi: I was never on the last team, but thank you for not just allowing football to become such a powerful force in the world, but in being a supporter of opening it up to all genders. Allowing a girl like me to have the same opportunity as the guys have.

Carson: Simeone, in your last few years on this great planet, you accepted a nation that was willing to make a stamp in the world’s sporting events into your country and made sure that we had the same opportunity of success as everyone else in the competition. We weren’t forced to stay in roach motels, but were treated in the same way as everyone else was from the start. It was a great welcome, and we know that you wanted it just that way. We weren’t the first, first-time nation to ever come here, and we know that you were always gracious of everyone, as it showed how great and far reaching the game of football is.

Borsinger: I’d like to say a short prayer. (Players bow heads) Dear Lord, please bless this great man, Simeone Di Bradini. Bless the entire Di Bradini family, and everyone who was personally touched by him. This was a great man in his time on earth. Skilled as a football player, his biggest influences came after his playing career was done, as he wanted all football players from around the world to have the chance to show their skills to the biggest of crowds. This event that is in his name epitomizes just that very thing. As an event designed for the younger players, the future of the great sport of football, Simeone was the pioneer in allowing all of us to get together, and play, but to also grow as players and more importantly, as people. Amen.

Team: Amen.

Carson: We now embark on this journey, as the Di Bradini Cup now lives in your memory. We were most honored to win the previous Cup but have never lost sight of its significance. It’s time to do it again and while we go at it, we will never forget you or your mission.

(Carson places a framed team picture with Simeone taken after the Rockets won the Cup in front of the grave).

Carson: You were with us then. And you are with us now, and will be forever. Thank you, and may God bless you. Rest in Peace.

Team: Rest in peace.

(OOC: Weren't scores supposed to be posted today?)

ooc: forgive me for making an OOC remark ICly...

Hwang and Wang sit in their giant room filled with alternate realities on different screens - arguably the most important job in the Empire, since they must determine which alternate realities are really real. One wrong move will inevitably lead to more wrong moves, and then Heaven help us.

Hwang: *unfurls popcorn bag*

Wang: Are you always eating popcorn on the job?

Hwang: We're always on the job. Why not?

Wang: Didn't you have a girlfriend at one time?

Hwang: Never. Isn't that why you're here now?

Wang: *shutters* No. And me not having any girlfriends has nothing to do with it...

Hwang: I knew it! You're gay!

Wang: What? I am not!

Hwang: Oh, look! A hot spot! News reel from this reality says... "Lesbians to sue Lesbians for using their name in a homosexual context (http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/europe/7376919.stm)"... how weird?

Wang: What? Let me read that! You're just making stuff up now! Oh... you aren't. Well, that's a bad reality anyway. I don't like the word - "lesbians" - sounds let's like an invitation or something.

Hwang: See? Only a gay guy would say something like that.

Wang: Only a gay guy is completely obsessed with gays. What is wrong with you?

Hwang: Didn't you ever get the desire?

Wang: What? You are gay?

Hwang: I knew it!

Wang: %$#^. I'm not playing this game.

Hwang: Oh, look the Empire is playing tonight.

Wang: Didn't we lose already? *sighs* I can't afford to hear you shout and scream every time we score a goal.

Hwang: What about the "boos"? Booing is baaad sportsmanship.

Wang: Well, you boo every time the other team scores and you're not even an athlete.

Hwang: Did I ever tell you that I had the chance to join the Imperial Team?

Wang: The Imperial Team wasn't even around when you came to this job. I should know because we came at the same time.

Hwang: I know. But... I had the chance. I watched it on one of these videos, and I was thinking what kind of reality would that be like. If I controlled my own life from inside here. I thought it was a great idea, but then I thought that there was something wrong with it.

Wang: You can't exist at two places at the same time?

Hwang: No. Not that. Every time I watched myself have sex with some girl, I'd have to masturbate to get the same feeling.

Wang: Dude. You don't even have a girlfriend.

Hwang: I know. Sucks, eh? *stretches arms over Wang's shoulder, hugs Wang, then kisses him*

Wang: *spits* What the %$#^ is wrong with you?

Hwang: I thought you said you were gay!

Wang: You thought? I never said I was gay! %$#^, I'm stuck with you on the one night you're feeling horny. Go watch those Jeruselemites and %$#^ with them.

Hwang: But I can't. They're on TV.

Wang: I'd bet that some guys would kill for your seat whenever you watch those girls get laid.

Hwang: Actually, the girls are more often doing the laying. I've never seen a guy with one of those girls lay them.

Wang: Okay, can we stop talking about the laying now? I'm feeling... weird.

Hwang: OO! Let's undress!

Wang: Let's not. Oh God! I said let's not! Not! God...

Hwang: You know what's missing now?

Wang: Your clothes?

Hwang: A room full of girls.

Wang: Dude. You've got problems. Look!!! There's a giant alien invasion going for Bazalonia!!! A giant alien invasion!!!! You've got to stop it!

Hwang: I can't the computer when I'm nude.

Wang: %$#^. *tries to hit the button while avoiding touching Hwang - Hwang touches him, and Wang hits the wrong button* %$#^! Look what you made me do! Now there's a cricket epidemic in Starbladyia! Get youre %$#^ing clothes back on, now!

Hwang: Who made you man of the house?

Wang: Can't you take a friendly suggestion?

*their supervisor walks in*

SUPER: What the %$#^ is going on? I've just gotten a call from the Imperial Office of Paranormal Activities, suggesting that giant puffs of slimy cream are covering cities in Candelaria And Marquez! And I know that there's only one way that happens!

Hwang: Wang made me undress!

Wang: What?

SUPER: Wang, get some girls in your life. Hwang, put your clothes back on. And the both of you stop smearing vaginal and seminal fluids over the world! God. Why didn't I get girls to do this? At least they don't get freakish when they're stuck alone...

Hwang: Actually, that's not true...

Wang: Hwang. Just finish your %$#^ing popcorn. God. Now everyone thinks I'm gay...

Hwang: Wait. I thought you said you were.

Wang: Hwang... Just finish your popcorn.

Coach: OK team, let's pick a Captain. I want volunteers first!

* All quiet *

Coach: Hey, this is the army - we want leaders here. I want someone to volunteer now.

* All quiet *

Coach: God, that's what happens when I get a bunch of trainees. OK, most of you don't look very smart. Anyone?

* All quiet *

Coach: Kids! OK, we need a leader here. Since no one is going volunteer ... I'm going have make the Captain the Dallas girl here.

* All quiet *

Coach: No comments? Come on kids!
Sadie Dallas: Err, why me?
Coach: Because your Mum was a good Captain. So might as well go for a known quanitity.
Sadie Dallas: I'll do my best coach. I'm not exactly born leader though.

Coach: Well, if you're anything like your mother - you'll be fine. Just don't behave like the other side of your family.
Sadie Dallas: Yes coach
Coach: Well, it's time to go outside and work hard. This is not a holiday from the army - we are here to work. No, and we are not Jeru FC either.

(OOC: Weren't scores supposed to be posted today?)

Supposed to, yes, but then my PC was supposed to be working correctly too. I'm working on it...

Voiceover: And now, your Pocono City Sports Report! Here’s your host, Meghan Traynor!

Traynor: Thank you and as always I am joined by the one and only, Kevin Collins.

Collins: That would be me. (Waves). Hello Meghan.

Traynor: Always good to be with you, Kevin. There’s a lot going on, as usual in Newmanistan sports, so let’s get right to it.

Collins: Oh you better believe it, Megs. Andrew Tremblay wins the OBIRA race for Newmanistan! Let’s hear it for Andrew!

Studio: Woohoo!

Traynor: Yes, great run by Andrew. His brother not as much so in the Formula One race as was the case with Allison Benjamin. NSSCRL gets rained out in Nethertopia.

Collins: The Rockets roll in the World Bowl, get schhhhmacked by Jeru FC in the Cup of Harmony, and get set to begin the World Cup of Hockey.

Traynor: My Lord, is it a busy day! But let’s start with the Di Bradini Cup, where the Rockets get set to defend their title. Can they do it, Kevin?

Collins: Well, I don’t really see why they couldn’t, but this group that they are in is absolutely brutal. It’s what we commonly call the Group of Death!

Traynor: Valanora.... Bazalonia. Their senior sides both still have a shot at World Cup 40 glory. Then you got the Fujisawan Territories. The runners up. So, both finalists from last time in the same group. Alongside three nations who’s senior sides are amongst the best in the world, because Cafundeu certainly is in that category too even though they have been ousted in the World Cup. What did Ofedestan do to deserve this?

Collins: Poor Ofedestan. But who knows, maybe they are this year’s Newmanistan.

Traynor: This group doesn’t need for that to happen. We don’t need them to become such a great Cinderella story. No offense or anything, but this group is tough enough.

Collins: Cinderella took home the Prince in the last cup.

Traynor: That she did. (Laughs)

Collins: Lightning doesn’t strike twice.

Traynor: Five powerhouses fighting for two spots. Because this group is going to be so difficult, don’t you almost want to say that whoever survives it is probably the favorite once knockout stages begin.

Collins: There isn’t a tougher group. In fact, it isn’t even close. I say invite all the Group C teams into the knockout stages.

Traynor: Wouldn’t that be something. So, even with the tough group, if Newmanistan gets through, you got to like their chances.

Collins: Absolutely. You have to keep in mind that Newmanistan is returning several key players who were there before, and should only have gotten better with age.

Traynor: Jeremy McAllister is the new captain. Are you surprised by that?

Collins: Not one bid, and in fact, it’s the best choice by far. McAllister has emerged as a great leader. Obviously he just sneaks in to be eligible for this, so the age factor helps, but it is more because of his leadership qualities and his maturation as a football player. Brian Carson loves him.

Traynor: Figuratively speaking, of course!

Collins: Ah yes, of course!

Traynor: Don’t you think that Starblaydia will be extra tough to beat as they play in the great Simeone Di Bradini’s memory?

Collins: Starblaydia will be an inspired bunch, and I believe so too will their home fans. There’s been a ton of football played here lately, but you have to keep in mind how much of an icon Di Bradini was here, and still is, really. This is HIS Cup. They want this more then anything, and the Rockets should be glad that they would only have to deal with them in the final.

Traynor: So maybe we should be glad we’re not in Group A, then.

Collins: Group A is tough, the second toughest. Candelaria And Marquez is a top side, and Jeruselem should bounce back.

Traynor: Whatever happened to Sorthern Northland?

Collins: I don’t know. After the two great games we had with them in the last Cup, you were kind of looking to see where they would be drawn, only to see that there were no where to be found.

Traynor: Alright this guy by the camera is all jumping about and down pointing to his watching and hinting for me to send this into a commercial break.

Collins: Oh so that’s what he was doing!

Traynor: Well we have to keep the sponsors happy. We’ll be back after this. And talk some OBIRA.

Supposed to, yes, but then my PC was supposed to be working correctly too. I'm working on it...

OOC: Thats ok, take your time.

If you want to make bets in the Han Empire, you have to be a little discrete. As in, if you get caught, they send you to an education center for 4 weeks or until they're convinced that you've kicked the habit. Nonetheless, MBC people are showing the top picks by our loyal subscribers, the results of a recent poll on who will advance to the next round.

Group A
Candelaria And Marquez - 26%
Jeruselem - 24%
Starblaydia - 22%
Lovisa - 15%
The Macabees - 9%
Kenavt - 4%

Group B
Daehanjeiguk - 57%
Milchama - 23%
Fmjphoenix - 10%
Gwaine - 8%
Taeshan - 6%
Pablicosta - 1%

Group C
Elves Security Forces - 35%
Newmanistan - 30%
Cafundeu - 29%
Bazalonia - 10%
Fujisawan Territories - 4%
Ofedestan - 2%

Group D
Krytenia - 40%
Yafor 2 - 31%
Nethertopia - 15%
Agroprom - 7%
Blouman Empire - 4%
United Heztel - 3%

These are opinions, not professional draws. If you make a bet using these draws, you are doing so at your own risk, and MBC claims absolutely no responsibility for your inability to recognize your own risks of gambling. In fact, if you claim against us, we will charge you 100 times the rate you claim against us, since this is technically our property, and using it is simply violating copyright laws somewhere...

Mike Barcann: Hello all and welcome to this special edition of SportsRise, here on the Glocast Sports Network. Today we are LIVE from the beautiful country of Starblaydia for the 5th Di Bradini Cup. Games were set to start on Thursday, but due to some last minute stadium modifications the games have no definite start. But a spokesman representing the tournament has said they hope to have everything finished by the end of the weekend, with games possibly beginning today. And now over to Leah Rivers with a team report, Leah.

Leah: Thank you Mike, after talking with the team they appear very lax despite the amount of press coverage they have from other nations. This team is very young while looking at other teams, which have players from 19-21. The official reports have Gwaine at a 62000:1 chance of winning the tournament, and a 4000:1 chance of winning the group. This is definitely a tough environment. The team knows that, and they are using the odds as motivation to prove not only themselves wrong, but everyone in the world wrong as well.

Matchday One
Group A
Candelaria And Marquez 3-1 Kenavt
Jeruselem 2-0 Lovisa
Starblaydia 2-1 The Macabees

Group B
Pablicosta 1-0 Fmjphoenix
Milchama 1-2 Gwaine
Daehanjeiguk 3-0 Taeshan

Group C
Newmanistan 3-2 Elves Security Forces
Cafundeu 2-2 Fujisawan Territories
Bazalonia 0-1 Ofedestan

Group D
Nethertopia 1-0 Yafor 2
Agroprom 2-1 United Heztel
Krytenia 0-3 Blouman Empire

Th Unaclaimed Newspaper

Little Knights Lose to Daehanjeiguk

Last night the first round of the Di Bradini cup started and the lil' Purple Knights soccer team fell to friendly foe Daehanjeiguk. There veteran U21 cup nowhow was not to be found. The future stars of the National team picked up right were thay left of losing yet another game after there failure to pass the first round test last time.

Geese the coach looked utterly bewildered, this team has been together for for 5 U21 competitions. The 1st, 3rd, 4th and now fifth Di Bradini cup and the Justantina cup in St. Samuel. They even played together for the Atlantea Midget soccer club, and the Atlantea East Red Pigeon high school and middle school teams. They couldnt even beat the Dae's. A Purple Knight first. We lost to Daehanjeiguk. This would never have hap[pened to the national team.

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS BEGIN TITLE DEFENSE WITH WIN

Starblaydia- The fifth Di Bradini Cup is underway, beginning with a long moment of silence in honor of the late Simeone Di Bradini, in which not a peep could be heard. Not from the home Starblaydis, obviously, but also from the large Valanora and Newmanistan contingents attending the match. Once that was complete, the Rockets and Marauders got down to business, both wanting to get the Di Bradini Cup started with the right result. It is the first time that Newmanistan has played Valanora, a team who’s senior side is regarded as one of the elite in the world, and presently a semifinalist in World Cup 40.

Although Newmanistan has a long way to go to achieve the reputation that Valanora’s senior side has earned, at the junior level, the two nations are a lot more equal. Both teams have high hopes, and as the game’s opening minutes ticked off the clock, you could see each time being a tad conservative in wanting to get a feel for the personnel on the other side. This didn’t take long, and once we got past the 10 minute mark, we began to see each side generate some quality opportunities. Still it took a while for the first goal to be put on the board as the defense on both sides were making the plays that they needed too. In the 32nd minute, however, the Rockets struck with the opener as the leading goal scorer in the entire 4th Di Bradini Cup, Jeremy McAllister, opened the scoring, blasting a shot that very nearly was stopped by Julius Revi, deflecting off his fingers, but into the net for the 1-nil lead. Credit Shawn Drummond with an assist. The lead lasted a little while, but Valanora would draw even just before halftime, on a goal by Valaria Love in the 44th minute. Love was set up brilliantly on a beautiful pass from Calla Soler, something you could tell they’ve done many times before. At the break, we’re all square.

During the intermission break, the Rockets were generally upbeat, though a little disappointed to have relinquished the lead so late in the first half. They were involved in a tight contest that looked as though it could go either way, and coach Brian Carson laid out some strategy to the team to try and have the second half go in Newmanistan’s favor.

As much as Carson may have tried to make adjustments at the intermission, the best strategy seemed to have been made by Roki Sardan of Valanora as his Marauders came out flying and wanting to quickly build on the momentum of the Love goal. Fortunately for Newmanistan, Corey Hennis made some brilliant saves, and the back end defense, led by Jeremy Brooker and Tony Borsinger held serve and kept them from scoring. Once the Rockets survived this burst, they went on the attack, and in the 64th minute, went ahead by the score of 2-1. Regarded as the next big thing in Newmanistan, Alex Parnett flashed his signs of immense talent dribbling by three defenders before cooly sliding a pass over to Jeremy McAllister. Revi read the pass well, so instead of shooting, J-Mac quickly pass the ball back to Parnett who unloaded and scored. It didn’t last long. Just two minutes later, a fortuitous fluky bounce allowed the Marauders to get three people on net with only Steve Secrist back on defense. Secrist did his best to cover the play, but could not keep Calla Soler from striking home the equalizer in minute 66. Tied at two, and with time running out, both teams decided to take their chances, as in a group as tough as this one, getting three points over any opponent is vital, and both sides had to think they had momentum. In the 84th minute, we would get that goal, the game winner for the Rockets off the foot of 16-year old striker Jennifer Vilardi, who fought off Danen Lika before sliding the shot to Revi’s left. Goal! 3-2 Newmanistan, and that would be your final. It’s a big win for the Rockets over a top opponent.

Here’s some post game reaction:
Carson: “We did a great job today, we played 90 minutes plus stoppage time of great football, and we needed to for every minute because Valanora was also on top form. It should give us a lot of confidence that we could beat a team of this caliber while they played well.”

Brooker: “We know from their senior side that this is a very dangerous team, and it was important for us to get the three points that we did.”

McAllister: “We played a real good game tonight, and we should be proud of our effort. When we needed to make a play, we did, and that’s what successful teams do.”

J Vilardi (on the game winner): “Whatever I can do to help my team, that’s what I’m here for. I knew if I beat that defender I would have a good shot on Revi, so I was glad I could out muscle her and make the most of that opportunity. It is definitely a big win for us.”

Up next, Newmanistan will play Ofedestan. Ofedestan stunned Bazalonia 1-nil, and the Rockets will certainly be making sure that they knock them off and keep them from thinking that they can do the same thing that we did in the last Di Bradini Cup. Coming up sometime later, Clint Peterson will have his first sit down of this Cup with Brian Carson.

Major Hilary Clipon was talking her team after a first up 2-0 win
"Great work team! Especially in defense, which army teams suck at. Sadie Dallas, great job. She may look a bit dopey and the girl who jumps into guy's beds. Well, she is but the Dallas football leadership is there. When she tells you're not working, please ... pick up your !@#$%^ game. We have a lot to improve still. We must work harder! We can't let them have the ball. I want you lot to keep possession even we aren't trying to score. We don't have Dazza Dallas, Kate Dallas, Scarlet Ferris or Flak Sho in this team. We need someone to step and control the midfield. We have lots to learn. I want 150% commitment from now on, because this is still a war. A sporting war, we must fight to win. No giving, no gifts to the opposition. And people, Sadie is a defender ... she is not midfielder. She isn't a Jacinta Sallad either as she's not going bob in attack either."

Gwaine proves tough competition, beats Milchama for first International Win despite Samuel Matthews leaving in the first two minutes.
By: Mike Barcann

"Rone with the ball, he cuts across the field. Milchamas defenders trailing him by a good 3 or 4 feet. Rone with his incredible speed one on one with the goalie, he kicks it up, the ball hits off the top bar. Rone gets his own rebound and its in GOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLL!!!! Jonathan Rone with his first goal with 2.6 seconds remaining in the second half of this game. Gwaine pending some miracle play will walk away with their career win."

That was the call by announcer Gregory Heles. At approximately 6:15 EST in Gwaine, this goal sent the entire nation into a frenzy. With President Edward M. Snyder in attendance our boys did not disappoint. With the first goal by Stefan Skirpak trailing 1-0, then Rone kicked in the game-winner with 2.6 seconds remaining to clinch the win. This was definitely a tough game against a well-trained team.

Team reaction:
Coach Garber (On the teams chemistry and Milchama): "Our team played extremely well tonight, I have to give credit to Milchama's goalie and how great he played through the first half. They are a good team who proved to be great competition."

Jonathan Rone (on his goal with 2.6 left): "I couldn't believe it. The first kick when it hit off the bar I thought I blew it. But when it came back, I just saw it and headed it in, i didn't see if it went in but when I heard the stadium I knew that was it."

Trainer Doug Malkene (on injury to goalkeeper Samuel Matthews): "It appears to be nothing major, just a minor arm injury at the moment he is to go under an MRI later tonight. We are going to keep him out the next game to be safe."

Samuel Mattews: "When I was coming down after the block I felt this sharp pain in my neck and couldn't move my left arm for a couple seconds. I immediately signaled for the trainers and knew I couldn't continue. I just hope to be healthy to continue playing."

Coach Garber (On the injury to Samuel Matthews): "It was a definite loss, I didn't see him go down but once the stadium was silent I knew something happened. At this moment we know that is an arm injury, and he will not play tomorrow night for safety sake. Grace stepped in really well and manager to block all 13 shots faced to her. She had her game face and it showed."

Silver Wolves Roster

Manager: Isilvarnon Moraedenshar.
* - indicates starter.

*1)Goalkeeper: Tarakaran Divanlir. Age: 18. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team.
2)Goalkeeper: Ahadris Kolukernin. Age: 20. Club: IYC Kaharan Youth Team.
*3)Left Defender: Ahagorsk Hilvantir. Age: 18. Club: Ajer FC Youth Team.
4)Left Defender: Jahakin Daans. Age: 17. Club: IYC Kaharan Youth Team.
*5)Left Center Defender: Ajorlian Acurivan. Age: 18. Club: IYC Kaharan Youth Team.
6)Left Center Defender: Agevar Vanorilin. Age: 19. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team.
*7)Center Defender: Ahor Kalinkir. Age: 18. Club: Ramen United Youth Team.
8)Center Defender: Kjarik Tashkir. Age: 19. Club: IYC Kaharan Youth Team.
*9)Right Center Defender: Venasir Nahorian (Captain). Age: 17. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team.
10)Right Center Defender: Fariz Bullar. Age: 18. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, West Ajer.
*11)Right Defender: Ahagarishk Va'ask. Age: 19. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team.
12) Right Defender: Vagor Vincarel. Age: 17. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, Chelmar.
*13)Left Midfielder: Amario Otavias (Vice-Captain). Age: 17. Club: IYC Kaharan Youth Team.
14)Left Midfielder: Alager Adirondu. Age: 18. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team.
*15)Center Midfielder: Danilo Silva. Age: 15. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, Chelmar.
16)Center Midfielder: Amhertus Civarnu. Age: 19. Club: Chelmar FC Youth Team.
*17)Right Midfielder: Varolan Dori'id. Age: 17. Club: IYC Uharan Youth Team.
18)Right Midfielder: Ahershk Valinial. Age: 19. Club: Chelmar FC Youth Team.
*19)Left Striker: Nashiad Kalendar. Age: 16. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, Chelmar.
20)Left Striker: Van Corudinja. Age: 20. Club: IYC Vanan Youth Team.
*21)Right Striker: Jamie Durand. Age: 18. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, Chelmar. Half-Zwangzugi, half-Starblaydian, born in Yafor 2, has Yaforite citizenship.
22)Right Striker: Avajer Kalindin. Age: 18. Club: Imperial Yaforite Sports Academy, West Ajer.

The Silver Wolves play in a 5-3-2, a -1, if you're into that kind of thing.
My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers: Yes
Godmod Scoring Events: Yes
RP injuries to my players: No
Godmod injuries to my players: No
Hand out Yellow cards to my players: Yes
Hand out Red cards to my players: Yes
Godmod Other Events: Yes

For info about how they play: expect hard, tough, Yaforite defense. Lots of Danilo Silva dribbling. Most of the goals scored by Jamie Durand. Hopefully I'll have descriptions for all the players up by about Thursday, but no guarantees.

Hwang: That was a thrilling 3-0 win today!

Wang: You were yelling every six seconds - what was so thrilling?

Hwang: Oh, you know.

Wang: Oh, no I don't.

Hwang: Just the thrill of watching a bunch of kids play football.

Wang: You just keep getting stranger every day.

Hwang: What's wrong with that?

Wang: I don't know. Let's start with "a bunch of kids."

Hwang: I really like football. It's nice to see kids playing.

Wang: Nevermind.

Hwang: Oh, my goodness! We have to adjust reality!

Wang: What?

Hwang: *takes control and adjusts reality - everything rocks*

Wang: WHAT THE %$#^? Adjusting reality requires mutual consent of both parties! Not one!!! What the %$#^ did we do what for, anyway?

Hwang: In this reality, the Han beat Taeshan 72-0. Every single player on the team gets a hat trick! Even the coach!

Wang: Dude. Coaches don't play in football. And you could have chosen a better reality than "every single player got a hat trick"?

Hwang: It was a worth it.

Wang: But extremely painful...

SUPER: What the %$#^? Do you have any clue what you just did?

Hwang: We re-adjusted reality!

Wang: Correction, you re-adjusted reality. I didn't want to do anything.

SUPER: Why didn't you stop him?

Wang: I tried...

SUPER: Nevermind. We're a in a crisis, and you have 5 minutes to readjust reality back to what it was originally, or else the world is going to blow up.

Hwang: But why? We won 72-0!

SUPER: What? *puzzled*

Wang: It's football.

SUPER: I have no clue what magazines you have back here, but give them to me when we're through here. There's a massive armada of giant hamsters armed with nukes wiping out civilization. They've already nuked Bostonia - again.

Hwang: Cool!

SUPER: Not cool! We can't have nuclear Armageddon on our hands if we can't help it. If you don't re-adjust reality, the Han will be forced to intervene, and then the Hamster-loving perks of Kakaboo will retaliate. We need to get out of here!

Hwang: But we won 72-0!

SUPER: At this point, I don't care what dope you're smoking. Get us out.

Wang: Absolutely, sir! *SUPER leaves* Hwang, next time, I'm adjusting reality. Now, let's find home quickly before we're all consumed in nuclear Armageddon.

Hwang: But I like this reality. It's so cool.

Wang: What the %$#^ is cool about hamsters and Armageddon?

Hwang: They're hamsters with nukes! And they're cute hamsters too! Look!

http://www.icv2.com/images/72872Hamtaromd.jpg

Wang: Well, I guess they do look cute... but they're holding nukes!

Hwang: That's a pencil!

Wang: He's eating a pencil!

Hwang: Well, now he's eating a cabbage.

Wang: %$#^. I'm still changing it, because I liked the old world better.

Hwang: No! I won't let you!

Wang: Hwang, I can beat you up now and then change the reality, or I can beat you later. Which would you prefer?

Hwang: Now! *assumes position*

Wang: Okay. *re-adjusts reality back - everything rocks, and Hwang gets rocked with it* Enjoy that?

Hwang: That hurt!

Wang: Don't cross me - I'll do worse.

Hwang: *slaps Wang's head* Take that!

Wang: You really are asking for this. *gets up and slap kicks Hwang in the air, Hwang lands on the wall*

SUPER: What the %$#^ is Hwang doing stuck onto the wall?

Wang: He was asking for it.

SUPER: Well, don't do it. And good job getting us back to reality. Except someone spilled the singing beans over Candelaria And Marquez. Imperial Office of Paranormal Activities wants to know why.

Wang: I didn't hit any of the buttons!

Hwang: I did!

*SUPER and Wang look at Hwang, still stuck in the wall*

SUPER: On second thought, Wang, that's a perfect place for Hwang. Keep up the good work.

Wang: Thank you, sir.

Hwang: Wait, no one likes singing beans?

Wang: Not when they're stuck singing a stupid song (http://pbskids.org/barney/children/music/wheelsonbikesw.html).

SUPER: I suppose we'll have to send a special team of therapeutic psychologists to help out in the situation.

The Microlight Times

Good start to first ever Di Bradini

The Ofedestan Microlights have kicked off their first ever Di Bradini Cup attempt with a solid 1-0 win over Bazalonia. 'The team has come together really well in a short space of time, and winning their first match against a strong contender like Bazalonia has really helped', said coach James Newton. Our team's play was characterised by the Gun's huge kicks up the middle,then Melianic's great dribbling, then Hughes' crosses to Jefferson and Harper... We were working well, and it paid off. One account (Newmanistan) even said that we managed to 'stun' Bazalonia.
The goal followed the same traditional attack pattern of the Microlights, Schmidt booting it to Melianic, who dribbles and passes to Hughes, who crosses it to Harper, who volleys- INTO THE GOAL and the Microlights were leading Bazalonia, just after the break. Skeptics were keying an equalizer any moment, but it was not to be, with Ofedestan holding out to win 1-0.



Result:

Ofedestan 1(Harper(57)) - 0 Bazalonia.


Our next match is against Newmanistan, the defending champs. It will no doubt be much tougher than Bazalonia, but with luck it might only be 2-1 or something like that. Which would be great, considering they are the defening champs. But if we all work together, and with a little bit of luck, we might pull off an astounding upset over the champs. that is the hope that shines within every Microlight, Microlight fan and underdog favourer worldwide. The coach said that the team should try to **** ******* ** *** **** ***** *** *** **** ** *** ********* **** **** **** ** * **** ** ** **** *** **** **** **.(blocked so the opposition wont know our streategy)


And finally, let us be reminded of the legend that gave the Cup its name, Simeone di Bradini. Regarded as a hero by many, he will live on in the hearts of everyone who ever played in his Cup. All matches begin with a moments silence(if they arent normally, we make sure they do) to remember this great character, and would would be proud to do our bit.

OFS

(The microlights arrive at the stadium where they will be facing newmanistan)

Newton: Here we are guys. This is where we score the upset of the Cup.
Tigsby: Are you sure we can?
All: YES WE CAN!!!
Newton: Great enthusiasm guys. And remember what I told you. **** **** ********.
All: We will.
Newton: Now lets go out and have a practice. Lets take shots at goal.
(Jenkins takes up spot in goal, all others line up at halfway.
Newton: Now you know how this work. you take turns to dribble...
Jefferson:Yeah,yeah.
Ferguson: We know.
Newton: Thats great. Now. Who's first?
All: Me!!
Newton: Oh, do you have to make it so hard every time? Oh well, I' better choose. Get in a circle.(grabs bottle) Now. i'll spin the bottle to find out who goes first.(spins bottle.) Dan. You'll be first.
Wright: Great!
Newton: All others, line up behind me.

(team take shots at goal)

Newton: Great work guys. Now lets play Attackers v Defenders. Get in positions.

(All play game of attackers v Defenders, then do lots of other drills.)

(Another bus arrives)

Newton: It seems our opponents have arrived.

(All go over to newmanistan bus)

Newton: Shake hands with the opposition.

(All do so)

Newton: now, lets go do some more drills.

(The practice goes on. Newmanistan practice at the other end. Spectators start arriving. it starts to get dark. suddenly, the great stadium lights turn on.)

Newton: lets go get changed now.


In the changing rooms, a while later. The game is about to start.:

The team are fully changed.

Newton: Are we ready?
All: WE ARE READY!!!
Outside announcer voice: May i welcome to the field: Ofedestan and Newmanistan!

Newton: Remember our strategy. **** **** *******.
All:We will!
Newton:Great.

(team have almost reached the field)

Newton: Always remember who we are playing for.
All: we will!
Newton: Great. (Calls out) "For Di Bradini!"
All including Newmanistan: 'FOR DI BRADINI!!!!!'

(Teams file out onto the pitch)


OFS

THE ROCKET REPORT

OFEDESTAN REMINISCENT OF.... OURSELVES?

Starblaydia- We have one game in the books in the 5th Di Bradini Cup, and with the Rockets scoring a huge win over Valanora, the focus turns to Newmanistan’s next opponent, Ofedestan. From all our talk since we began competing at this level, it’s always been the Rockets were the newcomer with something to prove, so it makes the upcoming match with Microlights of Ofedestan a bit of a role reversal. Clint Peterson has his first of probably several, sit downs, with Newmanistan manager Brian Carson to talk about this and other topics.

CP: I’m here with Brian Carson. Brian, it’s good to be back doing one of these in a Di Bradini Cup setting, isn’t it?

BC: It is, we’re really excited about the Di Bradini Cup this year. We know we can win it, and now it’s all about doing it again.

CP: The next opponent is Ofedestan, and I want to talk about those guys for a bit, but let’s start with a brief backtrack. The 3-2 win over Valanora was big. Your thoughts?

BC: It was, Valanora’s a great side. With the success of their senior side, you have to wonder if the junior club will ride their coattails a little bit, and I think they did. We saw a great game.

CP: So often, a football game comes down to who can close the game out in the end. Teams that do that win championships. To win in that matter, has got to make you feel good.

BC: It does Clint. At this level, there’s so little separating everyone. Every player on all 24 teams is a very talented individual, meaning that all 24 teams are legitimate threats to win the Cup. It always comes down to who finishes it out in the end. We did that tonight.

CP: The Rockets next game is against Ofedestan. A fan e-mailed me with a catchy nickname for them, Newmanistan v2.0. It seems like they are taking the same path the Rockets did in the last Cup.

BC: The fact that were a complete unknown, and came to Starblaydia, got results and won the Cup is going to be something that I think a lot of teams look to emulate in the future. A precedent has been set that it can be done. So why can’t Ofedestan win the Cup. They absolutely can.

CP: They may sneak up on other clubs, as they did with Bazalonia in completely shutting them down, but you have to think there will be no sneaking up on Newmanistan.

BC: Not at all, if they beat us, it will be because they earned it on the pitch, not because we took them lightly. Our scouts picked up some good game tape on them with the Bazalonia match. We focused our scouts on that match since we don’t have a ton of information on them. We’ve been studying and analyzing the tapes, and trying to pinpoint where we think we can beat them. They had a very strong performance.

CP: The game plan is coming along though, right?

BC: Absolutely, we have a great group of scouts and assistants and we feel that we can come up with a solution for anything. We’ve begun to see where Ofedestan can be exploited. I’m not going to come right out and say where, but we’ll have a good gameplan.

CP: You spoke with their manager Newton briefly before a training session. What was that about?

BC: Just a couple football coaches talking about football. They’ve shown us a ton of respect, and likewise I think they like seeing that we’re giving them the same amount of respect. They have a nice group of guys there, and we’ll wish them well once this game is over.

CP: If they weren’t in your group, would you secretly be rooting for them?

BC: It’s a tough group for them to be in, I do admit. But as we saw in the last Cup, if you believe it can happen, you can make it happen. They seem like the type of nation that can draw the neutral fan as we did to an extent here last time, so maybe we would be rooting them on. But this group is just so strong, there’s really no room for error.

CP: That’s why three points will be important here.

BC: They will be very important.

CP: Alright well, best of luck, and go get those three points.

BC: Thanks Clint. Go Rockets!

OOC: My players are in Tabeck. Perhaps the kenavt game was played there. Perhaps not. Who can really say?


The air in Tabeck was still, and the tide was low and sluggish; but for the Candelariasian footballers used to the aural dissonance of the dressing room and the cacophony of the CMSC’s finest stadia, there was still plenty to punctuate the unsettling calm. The spitting rain, bouncing off the sand and water and assorted heads. The keening of seabirds – or lakebirds, presumably – over the dark, swirling waters of the Bekk. Laughs, shouts, incongruous honks and the general hustle and bustle of the massive complex of the AORDO headquarters half a mile up the coast. The occasional thunk, and strangled yell of “FOWER!”

The twenty-odd players and coaches looked up from the battered jolly boat momentarily, as a aging sufferer of endemic non-neurological congenital hypothyroidism, wearing a grey sweater and yellow-and-green check plus-4s, trotted down onto the beach, nodded at them stoutly (though to be fair, this really was his only option), knelt down to dig his ball out of the sand slightly, before taking aim and driving long into the distance.

“Dornt teel a sool, ye ken?” he grinned at them, putting a thick finger to his lips before wandering off.

Agamemnon Knight, the captain of this current set of C&M under-21s, pulled himself together and wiped the rain out of his eyes. He turned to Jerry Huntick. “Gaffer… Are you gunna tell us why we’re here, now?”

The old manager sighed. “Were you happy with that performance, Aggie?”

“Considering we’ve never played together before? Yeah, actually. You can’t argue with three-one.”

“And you really think the Macabees will be that easy?”

The players shuffled their feet and kicked vaguely at passing crabs. Only Knight, who’d come through at Huntick’s KT Hotspur and had known the old guy since he was barely out of nappies, seemed brave enough to plough on. “They did lose to Starblaydia, boss. I’m sure we’ll up our performance, anyroad.”

“You’ll have to. It was poor, Aggie. Poor from all of you.”

“What, because we didn’t keep a clean sheet?” Cas Richardson snapped. The well-healed striker for one was already tired of Huntick’s cautious outlook.

“Yes, Casper. Precisely that. You were two-nil up and coasting at half-time. Seventy per cent possession, seven shots on target, fifteen off target, lovely early opener from Jason, magic solo run from Gary. You didn’t think you’d have anything to worry about, did you? You certainly didn’t expect to be clinging on for dear life towards the end, eh? You got cocky, boys! And girl,” he added. Peppi Elduayén looked up from her embryonic shell necklace, and blushed. “You didn’t respect the opposition! And you didn’t respect yourselves either, and you didn’t respect me.”

“Gaffer… It was only chance that we conceded. I mean, Santers made a bit of a hash of it.”

“Yeah,” Stefan Santamaria, the goalkeeper, grinned manically.

Huntick was a little man and Knight was a lofty monster, but the manager still managed to look the defender straight in his eyebrows. They had little lines shaved through them, and the rain was trickling down the player’s forehead and congealing in the lower eyelid. Knight blinked nervously.

“Aggie… Was it only chance that you and Caleb twice had to clear off the line? Was it only chance that their forward missed an open goal? You could easily have lost that game three-two, before Kian knocked in that long ball. You were panicky, and you deserved to be! All of you. Even those of you on the bench! You need to learn a little bit of humility, lads. And lady. Otherwise we’re all going to be going home very soon indeed.”

“We do take the point, gaffer,” Tom Ely ventured eventually, “But, um… Why are we standing on a soggy beach looking at a wooden boat?”

“Because this, Thomas, is the final resting place of Simeone Di Bradini!”

Gary Mills and Guillermo Ibarra mouthed “Who?” at each other, while the others players shuffled nervously.

“What, like, this boat?” Jason Federici asked.

“Well, no.” Huntick conceded. “Not this actual boat. But legend has it… Very recent legend, I’ll grant you, but legend all the same… has it that the great man – my childhood idol – chose to be sent out to sea, as his final act.”

“Ah. So this is a symbolic boat, then?” Niv Cohen ventured.

“Analogous,” Arthur Wangen offered.

Peter De’Ath, standing next to him, span round angrily. “Look, just because I like my hair to be nice and wear a bit of eye shadow occasionally!”

Huntick coughed. “We’re here to pay our respects, lads. And lady. Everyone else has done it, one way or t’other. And you need to learn just how far away you are from being worthy of even looking at the great man!”

“Technically we’re just looking at some random boat, but…”

“Shush, Casper. So. Would anyone like to say a few words. Aggie?”

Knight blew out his cheeks, and faced the boat. “Well… I, um, I never knew you, Mr. Di Bradini. I never watched you play. As it happens I, uh, hadn’t actually heard of you until…” He caught Huntick’s eye. “Um, but anyway. I know you were a great player, a great man. A masterful striker…” This elicited giggles from several of his colleagues. “You could be a stern man at times,” Knight ploughed on, as Caleb stifled a laugh, “And you certainly liked your port –”

“Ha!”

“Caleb!”

“Sorry, gaffer.”

“Yeah. Don’t be a deck head, Cal,” Jamie González admonished. “Look, Di Bradini was a great man, my dad always said. As honest as the day is long. You’d never catch him, y’know, rigging a game or anything. He leaves young players like us just trailing in his wake.”

“Buoy, he was some player,” Hansson Kemp agreed. “I mean, I didn’t know him either, but I’d’ve liked the cut off his jib, I’m sure.”

“An’ he were cultured, as well. A man o’t’ world. You couldn’t call our Di Bradini a bumpkin,” Lloyd Carpenter offered, to nonplussed stares. “Itt’n iron bar,” he explained. “Thee tie t’mizzen sheets to it. M’dad works on t’trawlers…”

“The point is, boys,” Huntick said quickly. “You better learn that however good you think you are, you’ve got a long way to go before you can hope to emulate the likes of Di Bradini. And you better learn it quickly.”

“Aye,” Will Poole nodded. “The schooner the better.”

Huntick sighed and gave the little boat and push with his foot, sufficient for it to collapse. He turned around and motioned for the others to follow him off the beach. “Tactics, then, I suppose. Jamie, you’re just not exploiting the space behind the front two enough, you need…

***

“Sir?”

“Morning, Sam. Yeah, I’m here. What’s the panic-up?”

“Um. There’s beans, sir.”

“Beans… Where?”

“Like, all over north-east Marquez, sir. Millions of ‘em. As far as the eye can see.”

“Well… What sort of beans, Sam?”

“Um. Singing beans, sir.”

“…”

“Sir?”

“Sorry Sam, the line from Krytenia isn’t great today. Is that string beans, you said?”

“Uh… No. Sir. Singing beans.”

“Singing beans?”

“They are the musical fruit, sir.”

“Well… What’re they singing?”

“The wheels on the bike go round and round, sir.”

“Madre de Dios…”

“I know, sir. I thought I should probably let you know. Coming so soon after cumgate, an’ all.”

“They haven’t even got the song right.”

“I know, sir. The major bus companies are up in arms. Several local councils are also concerned that the horn on the bike goes honk, honk, honk. There are fears over noise pollution, when by rights it should be the bell going briing, briing, briing. Sir.”

“Yes, I can see why that would cause some sleepless nights… Alright, what’ve you said?”

“An airship carrying a large shipment to Pacitalia exploded over head. They’re edible, but contain tiny microprocessors, which shouldn’t really be ingested.”

“And do they?”

“Actually, they appear to be sentient, sir. One called me a very rude word when I tried to dissect it. We’re arranging for recycling bins to be sent to every homestead in the area.”

“Good. Good work, Sam. Keep me informed.”

“Will do, sir. G’night.”

“And you.”

Lyndon Hernández, sort-of-Minister for Rational Thought, carefully placed his mobile back on the bedside table.

“This is getting weird,” he muttered.

Dear Grandma

This is my first trip overseas! It's a bit confusing, travelling. It doesn't help if you're in army either with all that extra paperwork one has to do.

Starblaydia is an interesting place but since he don't get much time outside training and playing football, I'm not going to get much chance to learn more about it. Still, I'd like to explore the place more. People are always very interested when you say you are a Dallas, and single guys are very nice to you.

It's funny playing in defense. I know most Dallas girls play in midfield or attack but I don't know why I'm in defense. Dazza, you, Kate and Hikfie played in the midfield while only my mother Rashina and Fiskin plays in defense. It's a bit rough in defense, you spend a lot of time chasing people and getting hit by balls. You don't spend a lot of time actually in possession.

Also being Captain is pain with this team. They always need to be ordered around and don't have much intuition of their own. I think being in the army makes some people brainless idiots. I don't know if I can inspire the team. I can't jump around and get people moving like Kate does. Hopefully I can get the team to start thinking and actually do things without having shout at them. The strikers aren't too bad, they like being creative. The midfielder seem a bit lazy and need to move a bit faster. The defense is sluggish and need a kick for them to actually do something.

Sadie Dallas

OOC Grandma is Debbie Dallas

(Rockets players gather prior to the game to discuss things)

Brooker: So, Ofedestan, where is that?

McAllister: Some place called Wysteria, they recently declared their independence and now trying to make a name for themselves in the football world.

Brooker: Cool, just wondering. They aren’t going to make it against us.

McAllister: They have a lot of heart, but there’s one thing they need to remember. So do we.

Brooker: So, let me check out the twins. What’s up ladies?

J Vilardi: Hey Brooks!

S Vilardi: You guys ready to play today?

J Vilardi: Heck yeah, maybe Shannon, you can get into this game too.

S Vilardi: Coach says he’s going to try to sub me in.

Drummond: Great job, Jenn, on that big goal in the first game.

J Vilardi: Mmm hmm, you guys won the Cup, I want to win one of my own.

Brooker: Kate Sallad has nothing on you two.

Drummond: (whispering to Brooker): I got 200 gold coins on getting one of them first.

Brooker: You’re on!

Borsinger: What are you guys talking about?

Drummond: The beauty of the twins, don’t you think, Tony?

Borsinger: Sure, but I try to look at them more as football players.

J Vilardi: Thanks Tony (thwaps Drummond on the head)

Drummond: It just gives us more motivation ladies, because we want you two to experience a Di Bradini Cup championship.

McAllister: As long as we keep our focus, remember what we learned last year. Needing to know when its time to be serious and when its time to have fun.

Brooker: Did you pick anything up from the game tape?

McAllister: Quite a bit, they have some areas where they can be exploited, and I am confident that we can take care of business. These guys want to imitate what we did last year, well, it’s not going to work out that way, I’m afraid.

Borsinger: Not if we can help it.

McAllister: Where’s my boy, Alex. Alex get in here.

Parnett: Coming!

McAllister: This man right here is the future of Newmanistanian football. He will be a mainstay on our national teams.

Parnett: I’ll do my best! Go Rockets!

McAllister: Since he decided to play his club football in Nethertopia, I know how hungry he is to achieve great things for the Newmanistan when representing the Empire interregionally.

Parnett: This is a dream, man. I am so excited about playing last year after absorbing it all as a reserve in the last Cup. I won that Cup but I didn’t play, now I want to win it while I am playing. For Newmanistan.

McAllister: Everyone. FOR NEWMANISTAN!

Team: For Newmanistan!

McAllister: For Simeone!

Team: For Simeone!

McAllister: Alright everyone, hands together. These guys want to shock the world. Ain’t gonna happen, we’re bringing our “A” game right here, right now! “No Mercy” on three..... one .... two...

Team: NO MERCY!

Yaforite Training Facility, Starblaydia

"Bury it, Jamie!" Jamie Durand felt the ball at his feet as he piloted forward, his shoulder clashing with the shoulder of the defender next to him, his eyes fixed on the goal and the goal alone. He felt fire run through his veins as he lifted his foot off the ground, the ball rolling slowly and easily into an optimum position. This was a goal. This could only be a goal. Jamie Durand could scarcely believe how easy this was going to be as his foot began its slow ascent towards the ball, now having rolled to almost a stop. This was certainly a goal. If this wasn't a goal, nothing could be a goal. Jamie Durand felt his foot nearing the ball...and then he felt himself being thrown, something happening, and then the soft ground in his face.

"What was that?" Spitting grass from his mouth, Jamie was immediately up. He realized almost instantaneously what had happened - the defender who had been guarding him had smashed him, throwing him onto the ground, and forcing him to miss what would have been a clear goal. "That's a penalty, if there ever was one!" Jamie's eyes darted from side to side as he tried to find the player who he was sure had pushed him. Locking his eyes suddenly, Jamie quickly strode in that man's direction, his mind forced into a sole purpose - to get back at whoever had done this, in whatever way he could. It did seem like the fair and right thing to do. That had been a foul, after all, from Jamie's way of thinking.

"No way. You're blind." Jamie knew who had shoved him as much as everyone else did - the captain, Venasir Nahorian, the next great Yaforite center defender, part of a long line of Yaforite center defender. A tough and massive six-foot-five monster of a defender. "I didn't touch you with anything except my shoulder. Anyone with half an eye can see that. Maybe you couldn't, you filthy 'grammer." "'grammer" was a derogatory term many Yaforites used towards the immigrants from Zwangzug who had come recently. While the great majority of Yaforites were typically tolerant individuals, several looking down upon these immigrants, for whatever reason. Venasir was clearly among that breed.

"What did you say to me, you Generian-kissing dog?" It was a reference to the Yaforite-Generian War, in which Venasir's father had fought, been captured, and then released. Jamie was deliberately bringing down something that Venasir took to heart. It was entirely intentional - the captain was someone who, in Jamie's mind, clearly had it coming. Whoever had made this fool captain (Jamie had suspicions that it had been done under political pressure) needed a dose of reality - Venasir was an overrated player, and a rude one, to boot. No good for the cohesion of the team, and, in Jamie's eyes, he was one who was a weak player for the team in terms of talent, as well. The captain had what was coming to him for a long time.

"I called you a filthy 'grammer. You got a problem with that? Well you better shut up, because I have a problem with everything that you're saying." Unconsciously, or perhaps intentionally, both Jamie and Venasir had begun to move towards each other, their eyes locked on each other. "Come here, you bloody son of a Doomani prostitute. Get over here. I'm going to beat your ass." Venasir was too angry to notice that he was letting expletives spill out of his mouth, too angry to note that the players around had stopped playing and were not looking at the two of them. Jamie was in scarcely a better state, letting his anger roll easily off of his tongue. Easily.

As they neared each other, the Yaforite defender immediately leaped forward, his fists swinging wildly. Jamie ducked and slammed his head and upper torso, American-football-style, into the center of Venasir's chest. Letting out air with a thunderous boom, the Yaforite defender cursed to the sky, and then swung his body wildly, in several directions. Jamie knew, as everyone else there knew, how much stronger Venasir was than he was, but Jamie also knew how tough he had become since training began, and he was sure that he could take the other player. Together, on the ground, they began to tussle, each smashing the other at every possible opportunity. Almost instantly since they had begun, they felt hands grab them, thrust them apart, and they looked at each other, through the mess of players from the team between them.

Jamie could feel the blood running down from his nose, and he couldn't help but feel proud at the similar injuries that Venasir had suffered. In between the two players, however, stood the vice-captain, and he didn't look happy. Amario Otavias had been selected for the national team for the last World Cup, and had gained a considerable amount of playing time. His opinion carried a fair amount of weight. "The game is later today. Coach is out. There's no suspending the two of you for today's game. But when Coach learns about this, you two are going to miss the rest of the Di Bradini Cup. I'll make sure of that." The threat hung in the air, along with the hated between them.

Vyinta Times
That's A Poor Start

After another first matchday loss, abliet to the defending champions of the event, it's time to wonder if the philosophy of sending these players to this event was right. I know they won the first edition, but there were some pheonoms on that side, some that come only few lifetimes. Every other tournament, the squad has had enourmous struggles to produce anyything close to acceptable results. I blame part of that on Sardan's poor tactical ability, but some of the results come down to the fact of that these players are severely underdeveloped compared to their competition. To go on anymore about the disadvantages that being elven in such a competition as this would be redundant and a disservice to the players who are going out there and trying to put forth the effort to get the results.

For all the negative, there is some silver lining to take from the match. Calla Soler has definately raised her game a few notches, and I have to give credit to the Soldarian FC staff for the development this lass has made in these past two years. She looks much calmer in front of goal, and more resiliant in the face of adversity. Both of those traits were lacking last tournament, and if the poor defence can step it up, her and love can tear a path of success through the tournament with their scoring touches.

I'm not sure what can be done about that backline though. To be honest, it's really a position that the nation just does not develop much quality in. Sure we've had Mathias Nickel and Dwier Titenburg, but the rest of the what would be considered the best defenders in the country are just average or below that when compared to the rest of the world. I think it's a time that the VSC takes a look at how Hartdale is able to produce quality defenders and try to get the rest of the Commonwealth to emulate that, at least to a certain degree.

All that said, I'm optimistic despite the poor showing, and though I dislike the VSC sending a squad to the tournament, I have to give my encouragement to the players. I doubt that we will ever be able to raise the trophy again, but perhaps the learning expierence that the lads and lasses get makes up for it. For now, the mini Marauders will need to sharpen up, espicially at the back, and just go out there and play the game. If you can't win it, have fun, afterall that is what sports are about.

Article by Aneis Diocsa

Star, can you put a link for my roster in the first page? In the first page, it looks like my team doesn't have a roster, but it does...

(RP in some minutes)

GAZETA DO POVO - O JORNAL DA NAÇÃO CAFUNDELENSE
Sports Section - Articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

TEAM DOESN'T START WELL UNDER VEIGA'S COMMAND

The Di Bradini Cup is a nice opportunity for the Cafundelenses to see the players that are considered the future of the National Team. The players are still unknown (at least most of them), with few playing experience, but already very talented. This time, the coach is the young Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga, famous for his work in Metropolitano, which is now in the first division of the league. So, a good competition, interesting for these players and for the supporters too.

In the third Di Bradini Cup, the Cafundelenses saw one of the best generations of the country in action. In the goal, Kardec, who is now wanting a place in the National Team. In the defence, players like Russo and Gaëif. The attack seemed the worst sector, but Fausto was a key player in the team. And the midfield was the golden sector. Jorginho, Zé Sho, Tobias... all these players will be in the National Team for the next cup. Unfortunately, the generation of the fourth Di Bradini Cup wasn't so good, and the team failed to make a good performance.

And this time, will things be different? Some players were mantained, like Cícero, Renildo and Abreu. New faces like Marques and Alves seem promising. But, in the first game, they didn't motivate the supporters. Veiga tried to transform the team in a winner one, but in this game he failed to do so. The team was offensive, had some good goal chances, but missed most of them. The players seemed nervous and, as the opponent was a very offensive one too, ending suffering goals.

Cafundéu started the game using a short passes style, always wanting to score. Túlio was excellent in making these passes, connecting the defence with the attack perfectly. Hubert, Lacerda and Alves got the ball many times with conditions to score. In one chance, Hubert was able to invade the area and shot... the goalkeeper saved. The Fujisawan Territories replied fast with Sassa, who, with a strong shot, obligated Salathiël to make a wonderful save, really incredible. But the first half was Cafundelense. Alves, after dribbling the goalkeeper, scored the first goal of the game.

In the second half, Cafundéu couldn't hold the advantage, and the team from Fujisawan Territories made a good effort to take the lead. They pressured Cafundéu for some minutes, and Januário made a violent foul that ended in a red card. Lately, Japa made a defensive mistake and Go shot to score the first goal of Fujisawan Territories. Few minutes after, Go shot from outside the area and Salathiël didn't hold the ball. Things seemed difficult for Cafundéu, and Veiga made changes wanting to see the team scoring. Luckily, Alves appeared again to score, and the game ended in a draw.

CAFUNDÉU 2x2 FUJISAWAN TERRITORIES

Place: somewhere in Starblaydia.
Attendance: not released.
Referee: Anti Riiskanen (Squornshelous).
MOTM: Kenzan Go (Fujisawan Territories).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Japa and Montanha; Januário, Abreu (Rossi 45') and Túlio (Marques 72'); Hubert, Alves and Lacerda (Nando 72').
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/fujisawan_territories.png FUJISAWAN TERRITORIES: Kajiwara; Na'akahara, Yasuda and Kate; Kawaii, Distefano and Go; Takemago (Kamachi 63'), K.Distefano-Honda, Sassa and B.Distefano-Honda (Kajahara 45').
Coach: Shizuha Komine.

Goals:CAF: Alves 40'/78'.
FUT: Go 61'/66'.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – formation for game against Valanora: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Montanha and Barba; Fabinho, Abreu and Túlio; Hubert, Alves and Lacerda.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.
Style of +3

Match’s Referee: Filinto Gerhand (Lovisa).

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC goalscorers:

2- Alves

Samuel Williams put on Injured Reserve list.
By: Michelle Matthews

What seemed like a minor injury to star goaltender Samuel Williams (allowed 1 goal on 1 shot) is quite major. Recent CAT scans and MRI results showed he suffered a stinger, and not a sprained shoulder as routinely thought. "It looked as if it was a routine fall, didn't look like he hit his head or neck on anything" said defensive player Greg Tracksin who was the closest player to Williams at the time of the injury. "We wish Sam can get healed and maybe participate in the next Cup, but in the best interest of the team and his health we decided as a group to send him home for a full recovery." Coach Garber announced at his morning press conference. Starting for the Serpents in his place will be his sister Grace (10 shots, no goals), and filling the back-up role will be major league goalie Denny Hopkins of the Richmond Pandas (21years old, 4-6 Career Record).

Serpents to play Group Favorites Daehanjeiguk tonight.
By: Stephen G. Jones

Quickly after their exciting 2-1 win over Milchama Coach Garber, gathered the team together to watch their opponents game. Daehanjeiguk is heavily favored to win this group, and has incredible talent on all sides of the ball. The team has also played in multiple Di Bradini Cups as well. "Daehanjeiguk is an incredible team, and their 3-0 win over Taeshan showed just how disciplined and drilled their team is" Coach Garber said in his morning press conference "In order to win we will have to bring our 'A' game and then some. It's not going to be easy by any means. My players know that, everyone at home knows that. And if we somehow manage to pull out the win then it will be a well deserved one, and hopefully a nice clean game."
The Serpents will also be missing a key piece of their defense tonight as well, with Samuel Williams being placed on the IR list with a stinger. It will be interesting to see how Grace plays in his place. Denny Hopkins the called-up goalie is likely to arrive shortly after gametime.

Imperial Team looks to capitalize on "weak" group

By many accounts, the Han were given a lucky break. Milchama is the only recognizable name, and they're having a horrible start to their DBC campaign with a loss to an impressive Gwaine. Pablicosta dispatched Fmjphoenix with a narrow 1-0 win. Otherwise, the only eye-stunner was a big 3-0 win over Taeshan. But seriously, who else has the experience to topple the three-time returning members? Sure, it's probably cheating that Han citizens tend to age 4 times more slowly than foreigners, but that does not discredit the huge advantage that the Han have - the majority of the U-21 players have participated in the NFL in some form, or are on the college teams.

"I don't think anyone's going to claim that we're going to breeze through this group," Yu Giheung, the Team Coach remarked following the win. "But expectations are high after this our third attempt to take the crown. We've got the best talent in the world, and we've just got translate that talent into action. Even the best players can lose to the worst team, and I emphasize that point. Taeshan were a team of players, but our players played consistently in a team. Our defenders were working with the keeper and the midfield, while the forwards played back when needed to stop some pressure attacks. And I'm pleased to see Pak Gyuseon taking up the lead strike role. His two goals were pivotal, before Kim Yongji managed a clinical free-kick. I didn't really expect him to clear that goal, but there are some days when you have luck."

Ahead of the match against Gwaine, Coach Yu seemed confident over the Han's ability to dispatch them. "I don't doubt that it will be difficult. They played as a team against Milchama, which is why they were able to rebound and take the victory so late. Of course, we do have experience, but sometimes, the proud sometimes forget how high they climb before succumbing to a great fall from the slightest wind. We must be continuously cautious against the strong teams, and we must likewise become a stronger team, as we cannot win as a group of individuals."

When asked the special "enthusiasm coach", Coach Yu spoke praises of his efforts. "The man known to many outside of the Han Empire as the crazy guy whacking the stick on the ground has done a great job in bringing this team closer together. And the fact that he's an ex-convict shouldn't surprise any Han citizens. But I think that his experiences here have done him well. He's learned how to manage his anger and how to persuade people without violence. His official tenure with the U21 team ends after this Cup, but I'm encouraging him to stay with us until a little while longer. Regardless of his return aspirations in the Empire, he will become yet another fantastic model citizen. I think you'll probably see at the pitch against Gwaine too, except not whacking his stick every two seconds."

So what do we have for Gwaine and the Han? Our analysts suggest that we will win, but not without some blood split - the match goes in our favor 3-1. Gwaine will have more matches ahead too, so expect to see them off to an impressive inaugural start in the DBC.

Someone hit the random button on Candelaria And Marquez...

If you read today's International newspaper or listened to the radio and didn't snort out porridge from your nose, you need to get a life. It seems that people in Candelaria And Marquez woke to a double whammy. After a freak "snow" storm that dumped a mess of pre-biotic gunk on their streets, the people woke literally to the serenades of sentient beans dumped accidentally by some air carrier. Authorities have yet to provide any better excuse for the recent show of randomness; our local correspondents are blaming the elections, explaining that local electors are trying to woo voters by putting on a fancy show of randomness.

http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/daehanjeiguk/BOF28.png

IFA unveils Baptism of Fire Banner

IFA Chairman Count Jeong Mongjun announced the unveiling of the BoF Banner today for the Baptism of Fire 28. The banner features the color blue with a central white. The characters for "20" and "8" straddle a golden eumyang (yinyang (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Yin_yang)). In place for the two partitions in light (yang) and darkness (eum), two soccer balls in the respective colors have been substituted. The characters for "Baptism of Fire" - literally translating as "Fire Bath Cup" - surround the eumyang in fiery colors. Count Jeong Mongjun explained that the field of blue resembled the foreign world coming to the Han Empire across the sea, and the white field as the Han Empire. The eumyang at the center of the banner symbolizes the duality of nature and the pervasive nature of athleticism in harmony. The substitution of the golden color is to avoid any serious dilemma of ethics, to suggest that "good" and "evil" are relative items and that each serve their purpose in the universe of balance. Instead, the gold-on-white contrast suggests that the principles of conflict in human society should be left off the field and the spirit of harmony left in the hearts of those who participate.

Detractors noted that the flag was impossible to make, due to the complexity of the tones. "How do you expect our flag-makers to make something like that?" they remarked. Others suggested that if enough time was spent on more pressing issues than the next BoF Banner, we'd actually have no problems left. "They're spending a lot of time highlighting athletic progress, but we're still in the dumps in many places, left ignored in the development of this great land!" In my opinion, if I spent less time doing reflections on other people's reflections, I'd be a millionaire somewhere.

In the hotel room a meeting between the Captains and all the players-
Lisa Ray: I called everyone here for a reason, I don't want to make us all feel more tense about this game but we just need to talk about what we can do to capitalize on the few mistake they make.

Stefan Skirpak: For one thing, I thank Lisa for calling this meeting and think todays game will be a big one not only for us but for our opponents as well.

Jonathan Rone: By no means are we in for a cakewalk, they beat their last opponent 3-0. And they were a good team. We all saw today what determination and hear can do for team when our hockey team played a heavily favored team to a draw in the World Cup of Hockey. They had multiple times when they could've let up a goal, but they were determined not to go back as losers. And despite the 42 penalty minutes that were called on them and crapload of shots they faced and limited offense they walked away with a draw.

Lisa: Thats right Jon, they showed what exactly can happen when pure heart drives a team. I think our team has that heart to play at any level. This team we are all incredible players.

Stefan: And it will take more than heart to beat Daehanjeiguk, all of their players have played in multiple cups. They are easily the favorites to win it all, and just imagine what could happen if we pulled a win. We wouldn't be taken so lightly anymore, and people would acknowledge us as a team. Of course that's if we win. We have to win.

Grace Williams: I will be playing my hardest tomorrow, the hardest I have ever played in my life. Representing both my country, and my brother who unfortunately left so early.

Jon: We should dedicate our next game to Sam, and everything he has done for this team.

Lisa & Stefan & The Team.: I agree.

Markis Rudinsky: I was never given a chance to play any sport in school, I was never given a chance to meet any friends. Everyone shunned me as the 'new' kid just because i was from a different country. I want to thank everyone for accepting me with open arms and never once doubting me. The first person I met was Sam, and he was nice enough to teach me the game in only a couple weeks. All my efforts will be for him, and I want all you to know that you guys and girls are like my family, better yet you are my family.

Stefan: We are proud to have you here, and don't worry you'll be able to get your time in the spotlight. Everyone will know who you are.

Lisa: Yea Markis, I am glad I got to meet you. When I first heard of you I had no idea who you were. Now im glad your part of this team.

Jon: Pretty much what they said man, but get ready cause tomorrow it's going to be two teams who WANT to win. We are going to have to play the greatest game we've ever played at any level.

Stefan: Greg, that means everything you learned playing for the Tigers and winning the cup will come into play.

Lisa: Olesya you need to focus on strictly the game, and not the guys on the other team. And Melanie, I know you hate the comparison but you need to come with the same level your father played it.

Jon: If we only win one more game this tournament, lets make it this one!! Everyone IN *everyone goes in* Serpents on three... One... Two... Three..

Everyone: SERPENTS!!!

INTRUDER CAPTURED

Starblaydia- Yesterday evening, a man in his 30's was apprehended by Starblaydi police after his attempt to break into the room where Newmanistan is storing equipment at a local hotel. “We got a call of a fight breaking out on the fourth floor,” said a Starblaydi desk clerk who wished to remain anonymous, “So we called the police immediately, and they came rather quick. We had a break-in in room 418, which is one of the rooms that the Newmanistan team is renting.”

The identity and the ethnicity of the 34-year old man that was apprehended has not yet been released by Starblaydi police, and it is not known what his motive was for attempting the crime. Nor is it known for sure if the man was targeting Newmanistan in particular, or if his attempted break-in into the room was merely coincidental. However, our reports are that the suspect knew exactly what he was doing, and if defender Brent Treichler hadn’t been in the room trying on a new pair of shoes, it is very possible that the Newmanistanians may have had a lot of their equipment stolen. “I was in the room, trying on a new pair of cleats that had just been sent to me,” Treichler reported, “I hear the door open, and here’s this guy wearing all black coming into the room, and at first I think someone is pulling a prank on me, but then he lunged at me, and obviously that’s when I knew that this guy was trouble. He threw some punches, but I got the better end of it, and the police came real quickly, so it didn’t end up being too big of a deal, fortunately.” Treichler reported also that the man had a large bag with him, which leads most to believe that it was an attempted robbery.

We are confident that this man will be tried to the full extent of Starblaydi law. As for Brent Treichler, he’s fine, and is fit to play in the upcoming match with Ofedestan. He took a couple blows but as he says, “I’ve taken worse on the football field.” Treichler is not a starter, but is Brian Carson’s first choice off the bench for a defensive substitute. We'll have more information on this if and when it occurs.

Macabee Team Puts up a Fight … At Least

STARBLAYDIA – In what everyone expected to be a lost game, which it was, the Macabee team managed to drop the ball into the goal keeper’s net, despite the loss. On the other hand, the internal rivalry between Werst Bry and Mika D’Angíel perhaps cost the golden-white team their game, as at least three opportunities for goals were lost due to poor passing between the team’s forwards. This even has led many to believe that Werst Bry will be replaced in the next game as a starter by another striker, while Mika will remain playing due to the goal scored against the Starblaydi U-21 team. However, most agree that the team has made an incredible debut against one of the most powerful U-21 teams in the world and that the chances of victory against at least one opponent have clearly increased. What is sure is that the team’s management has now decided to take the game more seriously, as they see their team’s potential, and the team has been seen training hard for most of the day. To give a clearer impression of the situation, the 2-1 loss against Starblaydia was a surprise to absolutely everyone – probably even the Starblaydi team itself.

The goal was scored in the final fifteen minutes of the match – minute 83’, to be exact. The game seemed already settled, with the Starblaydi team leading comfortably by two points. However, a deep pass by the defense to the striker Mika led to a wonderful display of ‘tiki-taka’ and a goal scored from almost outside of the goal keeper’s box. The ball entered near the top right corner of the goal, although the lack of sufficient Macabee fans seemed anti-climatic. Nevertheless, the goal managed to jolt the Starblaydi team back into the game, as they seemed to relax after their victory seemed certain. Unfortunately, the morale boost due to the goal and subsequent offensive efforts failed to create a second or even third goals, and the game was finally settled at 2- 1 – as aforementioned. As indicated, the single goal scored by star player Mika D’Angíel is enough to reaffirm the team’s will to put everything they have into the game, making the new U-21 national team a very dangerous opponent – even for the likes of Starblaydia. Everyone can be reassured that the team will put in the same effort into the game against Candelaria and Marquez.

Candelaria and Marquez managed to pull off a 3 – 1 victory against Kenavt, a relatively unknown team (well, then again, most teams are unknown to us – given our lack of participation in prior U-21 tournaments). This victory has guaranteed them the temporary (perhaps) position of the leading scoring team in Group A, although in terms of goal difference they are tied with Jerusalem, which managed to settle their game against Lovisa 2 – 0. Currently, the leading teams in goal difference are in Group B and Group D – Daehanjeiguk ( 3 – 0 Taeshan) and Blouman Empire (Krytenia 0 – 3 ). Regardless, Candelaria and Marquez have fulfilled their expected role in the game and have fulfilled expectations for bidders in Daehanjeiguk – 26% of the bidders put their money on this team (only 9% on the Macabee national team!). Other notable victories include Newmanistan’s 3 – 2 victory against Elves Security Forces, while an interesting defeat (due to the proximity of the relevant governments) is Yafor’s 1 – 0 defeat against Nethertopia. But, the most troublesome game remains Candelaria’s blunt victory against Kenavt (which is in the same boat as The Macabees, in regards to experience). The Macabee players and management have gone from asking who this team was, to respecting Candelaria and Marquez as the group’s favorite. In regards to the expected group victors the favorites remain the aforementioned team and Jerusalem, with Starblaydia coming in third – however, these opinions are based only on a single match day, and we have yet to await for the next match and see how the results.

All the while, our reporters have tracked the training schedule for the Macabee national team. They have taken the lessons of the previous game in kind, and Derek Vadíern has seemed to put priority on greater cooperation between the strikers and more effort on part of the defenders to recover the ball before the opposing teams has a chance to score. For the days between match days training is hard, long and difficult, as the management has uncovered that the last two days prior to the match will be ‘rest days’. However, in the mean while, the team will bleed, cry and sweat as much as humanly possible. What is obvious is that Candelaria and Marquez will have to fight a match against a team willing to put everything into the game, no matter their chances of victory or rank, and that the team is ready to put everything into their training in order to prepare themselves for the duel. As we’ve mentioned in our articles before, despite the fact that the national team is not looking for victory, it is looking for respect and preparation for 6th cup – where, hopefully, the team’s performance will be completely superior to this year’s (although, their performance this year is nothing to scoff at – insofar). The team is also putting their hopes in the fact that the next game will prepare them for what are considered two easier matches – the third match against Kenavt ( 3 – 0 loss against Candelaria and Marquez) and Lovisa being the fourth ( 2 – 0 loss against Jerusalem).

It should also be mentioned that Mika’s goal against Starblaydia has gained an increase in audience for the Di Bradini Cup, given that more people are now interested in see their national team score. According to official reports from the relevant televisions channels and radio stations, during the game the audience doubled during the last minutes of the match, and it’s expected that the audience will be very large for this next game. However, it seems that the most popular form of watching and keeping track of the game was live streaming and more websites have included live stream options for the next game, tapping local television stations and what not. According to an unofficial poll taken by our reporters, six out of ten (6/10) people said that they will watch the next Di Bradini Cup match. However, only 3/10 people said that victory was a possibility. Of people asked, 6/10 mentioned that Candelaria and Marquez would come out on top and only 10% suggested a tie. Five out of ten asked said that Candelaria and Marquez would be group leader, while two out of ten suggested Jerusalem and three out of ten said Starblaydia. Currently, there is no decisive favorite for the competition in general, although most are leaning towards those teams that had overwhelming victories in the first match day. However, it should be mentioned that with football, anything can happen anytime. The Macabee national football team should know it best, with their 3 -1 victory the first game in the Baptism of Fire [don’t remember which one] and subsequent loss every game thereafter.

As always, we finish our report with some basic group standings:


Nation - GP GW GT GL PF PA PTS
Jeruselem – 1 1 0 0 2 0 3
Candelaria and Marquez – 1 1 0 0 3 1 3
Starblaydia – 1 1 0 0 2 1 3
Macabees, The – 1 0 0 1 1 2 0
Kenavt – 1 0 0 1 1 3 0
Lovisa – 1 0 0 1 0 2 0


Top Scorers:
Mika D'Angíel - 1/1

Imperial Announcement
http://i159.photobucket.com/albums/t156/daehanjeiguk/foreign.png

On Behalf of His Imperial Majesty, due to recent events, summarized herein:

(1) The State of the "United Provinces of Krytenia" has absolved all authority to the "Protectorate of Western Starblaydia";

(2) The State of the "Protectorate of Western Starblaydia" has absolved all authority to the "Protectorate of Starblaydia";

(3) His Imperial Majesty does not recognize the "Protectorate of Western Starblaydia" as an independent entity;

(4) His Imperial Majesty does recognize the sovereignty of the "Protectorate of Starblaydia" as an independent entity;

Therefore, be it resolved, the Celestial Regency of the Great Han Empire recognizes the "Protectorate of Starblaydia" as the sole protector of the former "United Provinces of Krytenia", and therefore holds the responsibility of maintaining foreign affairs in Krytenia as the responsibility of the "Protectorate of Starblaydia", until a legal representative from the former state in Krytenia comes to His Imperial Majesty to ask for international recognition.

Any offices related to the former sovereign state of Krytenia are to reverted to those pertinent to the state of Starblaydia. His Imperial Majesty furthermore states that as Starblaydia holds sovereignty over the former state in Krytenia, that the state in Starblaydia should honor agreements with other states that had previously established relations with Krytenia until new agreements should be arranged. Whereas the Han Empire has no outstanding treaties with the former state of Krytenia, we are satisfied with the transition in power, and we wish the sovereign of Starblaydia many blessings for a prosperous reign over the united territories of Starblaydia.

Count Han Seungsu
韓昇洙伯

(ooc: translated courtesy of MBC International folk who speak good Engrish)

Hwang: It's getting boring up here.

Wang: Good. I like boredom.

Hwang: Can you at least pop me another bag of popcorn?

Wang: No! For the last time, you ate all of them! All 502 bags that were sitting on the shelf! Two days ago! Everyone in the office hates you now! Stop whining!

Hwang: Can I have my magazine?

Wang: %$#^... No!

Hwang: But it's boring up here.

Wang: I'd hate to imagine what it would be like if it were not boring...

Hwang: Woohoo!

Wang: What the %$#^?

Hwang: Bats! Carrying spiked cyanide tablets!

Wang: I never saw this coming!

SUPER: Hwang! Wang! We've got a crisis! There's bats flying all over the world carrying cyanide-laced tablets in their feets. Or their hands. Or something. Anyway, we need to find another reality!

Hwang: Woohoo!

Wang: But Hwang is doing so well! We can't just abandon a good thing!

SUPER: I know, but the survival of the world is more important than Hwang's antics. Find us a good one.

Wang: %$#^...

Hwang: You know what's going to happen once I get down from here?

Wang: I hope that I don't know.

Hwang: I'm going to find myself a girl and get a bed.

Wang: Well, that doesn't seem too bad...

Hwang: And we'll have orgies on your chest!

Wang: Man. You sure know how to bugger a guy.

Hwang: I know. I did tell you that I had the chance to be a football player for the Imperial Team.

Wang: And what the %$#^ does that have to do with buggering?

Hwang: Football players are the biggest buggers around!

Wang: In your world... *shifts reality* Okay, here we are. What's the status?

Hwang: Where the hell am I?

Wang: Hwang?

Hwang: You know my name!

Wang: Oh, %$#^, he's not speaking Han.

Hwang: So many buttons! What do they do?

Wang: Hwang? What are you doing? No! NO! NO!!!!! Stop pressing the buttons!

Hwang: What the %$#^ is your problem? Do you know what these buttons do?

Wang: I have no idea what you just said, but I have a feeling it was a question. And the answer is no.

Hwang: Ah %$#^, I can't understand a wrong you're saying. Who are you?

Wang: The answer is still no.

Hwang: Ahn? I know a guy named Ahn. *presses buttons again*

Wang: %$#^! Stop pressing the buttons!

SUPER: What the %$#^ is going on here?

Hwang: Oh, great! More freaks in uniforms. Wait. I'm also dressed in a uniform. I'm a Nazi!

SUPER: What is Hwang's problem?

Wang: I think he changed his language.

SUPER: Well, care to explain to me why we've got reports coming from all over the world on Paranormal Activities? People in Qazox are reporting flying cows! People in Starblaydia are reporting flying pigs. People in Jeruselem are experiencing orgies whenever they see a flying mouse. People in Bazalonia are fighting imaginary elves. People in Krytenia don't even exist anymore! People in the Archregimancy are talking to us somehow. And Candelaria And Marquez... what the %$#^ did they do to your family? I've gotten a report suggesting that the country now smells like fart.

Wang: That's probably the beans...

SUPER: Oh, right. Anyway, get Hwang to the chamber. And stop pressing those damned buttons! Heaven knows why we made them.

Hwang: *looking in screen at himself* Holy %$#^! I'm Asian!

Wang: *knocks Hwang over and carried him to chamber* I don't know how you got this job, but thank your lucky stars that I care about what happens to you.

And in other news today, people are strangely experiencing the side effects of DEJA-VU. No knows why this feeling is apparently, but it seems that the remnants of "double-posting" as it's sometimes called are the effects of a glitch in the Matrix. We'll be back to normal business in just a moment...

I Give My Opponent Permission
(and actively encourage them) To:
====================
Choose My Scorers
GodMod Any Goalscoring Events
Yellow Card Players
GodMod Other Events for Humorous Intent
====================

Notes:
1) The best starting eleven are numbered 1-11 and are in bold

2) I actively encourage, nay nearly demand, that if you RP first you pick my scorers (if any).

3) The staff have out-of-date NSwiki articles, and these are linked.

4) * Denotes female player.

5) Starblaydia will perform the Raiigar (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Raiigar.html) war dance before each match they play.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SFA-Logo.gif
Starblaydia's 5th Di Bradini Cup Roster
In memory of greatness.

The Staff
LP. Lex Panarii (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Lex_Panarii.html), Manager, 45
33 Caps, 2 Goals (Uncapped at Under-21 Level)
He has taken Starblaydia to their best AOCAF finish in thirty-five years by taking Third Place in Bazalonia, proving his worth over and above that of Apollina Iakovakis. The creator of the Raiigar is now the pretender to the throne of Starblaydi management.

AI. Apollina Iakovakis (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/Apollina_Iakovakis.html)*, Trainer, 47 - Indigenous World Cup Winner
23 Caps, 4 Goals (Uncapped at Under-21 Level)
A competitive attacking midfielder in her playing days, Apollina won the Indigenous World Cup in her playing days alongside this team's captain, Izretar. She later went into coaching and currently manages Starblaydia's Under-21s, who she has led to third place finishes at both the inaugural Di Bradini Cup and International Justantina Cup.

The Goalkeepers
1. Kyli Seji, GK, 21 - FC Farça (1 Cap)
12. Jamar Wilson, GK, 18 - Paricone Athletic FC
19. Javier Bianchi, GK, 16 - Hippion Heartland

The Defenders
2. Peter Movalinen, RB, 18 - Nemya Hotspurs
3. Bekkinha*, L/RB, 20 - Tabeck FC
6. Charles Buckstone, C/RB, 21 - Foxchester Raiders (2 Caps at U21 Level)
11. Bazrador Drakkiborgo^, L/CB, 21 - Karak Ungor Chiefs (5 Caps, 1 Cap at U21 Level)
13. Ignacius Sverus, CB, 16 - Athletico Sciuntis
14. Nei Samba, L/CB, 15 - Malta Lines
20. Jeff Gavelli, LB, 15 - Port Cythera

The Midfielders
4. Wen Tze-shu, Captain, DM, 21 - IYC Uharan (Yafor 2) (11 Caps, 7 Caps at U21 Level)
5. Jaime Kuu, C/LM, 19 - Raynor City (ESF) (5 Caps 2 Goals, 4 Caps at U21 Level)
7. Lee Il-Ajun, RM, 20 - Veles (5 Caps)
8. Chen Myung-Bo, AM, 20 - CF Mont-Pluie (Ad'ihan) (5 Caps 1 Goal, 4 Caps,1 Goal at U21 Level)
15. Na-Me, C/AM,17 - Karak Ungor Chiefs
16. Hope Laokii*, CM, 21 - Tribe Urjali
21. Ricky England,R/CM,17 - Penningworth United
22. Panos Petropoulos, L/DM, 16 - Nemya Hotspurs

The Forwards
9. Daymon Callind, SC, 20 - Iskara Daii (1 Cap at U21 Level)
10. Diamontii Di Bradini*, SC, 18 - Jhanna Praetoran University
17. Jaison Debrier, CF, 21 - Fort Boston FC (Bostopia) (6 Caps, 1 Goal, 4 Caps at U21 Level)
18. Velat Thayil, SC, 16 - Cedrus Soundgardia
23. Hayden Albertini, SC,14 - Tabeck FC

The Formation
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarDBC5.jpg

Home And Away Kits:
Kits created by:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarHome4-1.jpghttp://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/StarAway4.jpg

Mike Barcann: Welcome to Daily News Live on the Glocast Sports Net we are LIVE here in Starblaydia where our Gwaine Serpents take on the the Imperial Daehanjeiguk. Despite this being only the second game of the cup it is already looking to be an intense showdown, and it started with this.

*Clip plays of the game-winning kick with 2.6 seconds left against Milcham*

Thats right our Jonathan Rone with the game winner against former competitors and finalists Milchama. It not only shocked all of us here, but people in the group as well who saw Milchama as the only team being able to beat Daehanjeiguk in our group. And now both teams match up evenly on the field in terms of abilities.

Chart comparing and contrasting the two teams:
Goaltending:
Daehanjeiguk has the edge here, with a well established goalkeeper who has played in multiple cups. He is also a fierce competitor who will do anything to win.

Speed:
Gwaine wins this category, they are an extremely young and agile group that plays finesse soccer. Players such as Jonathan Rone and Madeline Gretz who was deemed by a Milchama defender as the fastest person they have played against. The depth here is also fast, with lots of energy.

Scoring:
Daehanjeiguk walks away with this one simply on the fact they had three goals, compared to Gwaines two. Though the goals they scored were relatively drill goals from the box, they still had more.

Motivation:
Tough to say though I woud say Gwaine, the players are extremely eager to play in their first international games ever and are led by a very characterful group. After their upset win in the first round, our troops are definitely highly motivated to keep winning.

Defense:
Daehanjeiguk defense allowed only eight shots on goal, they take the edge here.

Coaching:
Even

X Factor:
Gwaine, they are a relatively unknown still at this point and Daehanjeiguk scouts have only one game record to see how they play. Gwaine on the other hads has footage of the same team from the past two cups.

Final Tally:
Gwaine (1-0)- III
Daehanjeiguk (1-0)- III
Result- Draw

Otto van Belhamel looked at his team. He just took the job because he knew it would be temporary. The Gray Towers should always come first place, but coaching the nethertopian talent was nice too. They already took a win, with Henk de Jong scoring in the last minute of the first half. The Falcon Chicks have a bright future in the tournament.

Van Belhamel was a little disappointed with the midfielders in his team. there’s only one professional midfielder he thought when he first met the team. a small midfielder, i guess.
“Guys, it’s time for some training,” he yelled. He had spent a few years in the army and had a hard way of coaching. He’d drilled the young Billy Cerulo with his force too, so why not this team?

TEAM ROSTER:
Style modifier: +1

Basic XI:
1 GK Edwin Tol 18 Ashdom City
Edwin is one of the four talented goalkeepers in the country. The two main goalkeepers are -21 too, but are not used. Tol is reserve goalie behind Newmanistani Nathaniel Russo at Ashdom City and is known for his catlike reflexes and far throws.

2 DL Mink de Kooning 19 Tenderville United
Mink de Kooning is probably the best player on this team. He was scouted at a local club by TdvUtd at the age of 8 and was a regular player in the A1 from his 16th till his 18th. He made the jump to the seniors this year. Captain of the team.

3 DC Levi van de Broek 16 The Gray Towers
The toughest player on the team and already in the starters of his clubteam and at this national team. At the age of 16 already 1.87 meter tall and a large scaled figure. A solid defender who doesnt fear hard tackles.

14 DC Andrew de Jong 21 FC DePardenti
Pacey defender who loves to go on an adventure. He’s one of those players who’s able to run all game long. Has the best stamina of all and has an addiction to race games on his handheld, which he carries with him anywhere.

5 DR Theo de Zeeuwse 20 The Peregrins
Theo is one of those quiet players which you don’t see all game long, but works like a horse and mostly doen’t make any mistake at all. He is also a quiet man off the field.

6 MLC Wim den Hoof 21 TdvUtd Amateurs
One of the non-professional players of this team. Looked like breaking through the first team of the Lions a couple of years ago, but lacked professionalism and plays with the Tenderville United Amateurs now, and is happy about it. He’s able to give a good cross and likes to shoot from a distance.

10 MC Michael de Vet 19 The Gray Towers
The professional midfielder. He’s the main contact point in the second line and has a great ball control. He’s a bit arrogant with the ball, but he knows how to handle it. Has all the qualities of a number 10.

28 MRC Max Klun 18 Isle of the Falcon SC (Amateurs)
A player for Isle of the Falcon SC, a club that has great chances to get into the NB-L next year. The number 28 is an inheritance from his father, who played in the same number at his club years ago. Max is the technicus of the team, preforming succesful trick after trick.

ST Rafael Versluis 21 Ashdom City
Basic player at Ashdom City. He’s a real clinical striker, always looking for goals in the box. He’s a real marksman and a penalty specialist too. He has a strained relationship with Henk de Jong, because the latter made his dreamtransfer to the Peregrins.

ST Henk de Jong 20 The Peregrins
1,88 meter long and extremely good for headers. Also takes a good free kick within 25 meters from the goal. As mentioned earlier he got a transfer to the Peregrins, but is mostly a benchwarmer.

ST Bob Mols 21 FC DePardenti
Shadowy striker who’s mostly not visable until he scores. Takes a perfect corner. He’s eager to leave FC DePardenti for a bigger club.

Subs:
GK Gijs Wau 18 The Peregrins
Reserve goalkeeper, very flexible and also in some weird way a good penalty taker.

DF Jonathan den Ouden 15 NAPC
Strong defender with length. Seems to collect yellow cards. Almost gets one every match he playes.

DF Jan-Tycho Gerbrantszoon 18 The Peregrins A1
Still in the youth of the Peregrins, But is developing quickly. Can play any position in the defence.

MF Frans Rücklich 17 Isle of the Falcon SC (Amateurs)
Agressive midfielder. Always works. Is called ‘the pitbull’. Perfect manmarker.

ST Jan-Paul Snip 19 Fc DePardenti
Lacks strength, but has alsmost the perfect shot. Plays a lot of race games against Andrew de Jong.

Home and away kit:
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/NetherHome4.jpghttp://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/ediraf/NetherAway4.jpg
Kit made by:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/I...ediraflogo.jpg

Matchday Two
Group A
Kenavt 1-4 Jeruselem
Starblaydia 2-0 Lovisa
The Macabees 3-3 Candelaria And Marquez

Group B
Fmjphoenix 1-0 Milchama
Daehanjeiguk 4-2 Gwaine
Taeshan 1-0 Pablicosta

Group C
Elves Security Forces 2-2 Cafundeu
Bazalonia 0-2 Fujisawan Territories
Ofedestan 2-5 Newmanistan

Group D
Yafor 2 1-0 Agroprom
West Starblaydia 2-1 United Heztel
Blouman Empire 3-2 Nethertopia

Jeruselem coach Major Hilary Clipon was reading the local papers when she read some news about ... West Starblaydia. She's never heard of this West Starblaydia! She wanted to ask the locals who'd know but she'd just look like a total idiot being from the Jeruselem army not knowing where it was. So she'd had get the information from a more diplomatic source. Asking the army for basic information was hard enough. It just happened Sadie Dallas, a relative of ambassador Dazza Dallas as in the team. The Dallas girls being worldly whores would know.

Coach: Sadie, I want to talk to you.
Sadie: Am I in trouble again! Hey look, I chat up men - I can't help it. I'm a Dallas.
Coach: No, nothing to do with that at all. I'm talking to you because you are Dallas.
Sadie: I'm confused.

Coach: Err, where is West Starblaydia?
Sadie: Oh, it's Krytenia. Same place!
Coach: Oh, when did this happen?
Sadie: When the leader of Starblaydia married the leader of Krytenia.

Coach: So West Starblaydia is just Krytenia ... oh
Sadie: Yeah, that's it.
Coach: I didn't know that. Good, at least I know now.
Sadie: That's it?

Coach: Err, yes. That's it.
Sadie: Why ask me?
Coach: Because your auntie is an ambassador, so you'd end up knowing these things.
Sadie: Why don't just ask the locals? They'd know!

Coach: I don't want look stupid.
Sadie: But Dallas girls do stupid things all the time
Coach: Yes, but they are allowed to. Army people must respectable and well, knowledgeable.
Sadie: We have Jeru FC, they aren't the brightest sparks.

Coach: Oh them, they are different.
Sadie: Can I go now? I need to go for a wax. Running late.
Coach: You'd better hurry then.
Sadie: Thanks coach

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS BRUSH ASIDE MICROLIGHTS

Starblaydia- In their second game of the Di Bradini Cup, the Rockets were matched up against an ambitious newcomer from the nation of Ofedestan, a country looking to go on the same kind of run that the Empire did in the last Cup. In the months leading up to the Di Bradini Cup, Ofedestan has gone on a productive search to find the best talent in their country have recently formed a new football league, which seems to be getting off to a good start. They knocked off Bazalonia, who by the way, have the senior side in the World Cup 40 championship ironically against Valanora, the team Newmanistan beat in the Di Bradini Cup opener. The Rockets weren’t going to take these guys lightly. Nope, not at all.

From the opening kickoff, the Rockets were set on controlling the pace of the game, and showcasing the great speed of their players, particularly Jeremy McAllister and Shawn Drummond. It worked extremely well, and in the 3rd minute, after making Rick McGiffert look silly on a brilliant fake, McAllister blasted a shot into the top right corner, a perfect shot that Dwayne Jenkins was hopeless on. You could see the looks on the faces of the Rockets players after that goal. They weren’t taunting the Microlights, but just letting them know that things were going to be a little different in this match. But the best way to do that would be to score quickly again, and the Rockets absolutely dominated possession of the ball for the next 15 minutes, forcing Jenkins to make some amazing saves, but in the 18th minute, he could not stop a header from Jennifer Vilardi from going in. It was her second of the Cup, and it was assisted by Dale Stevens. After the goal, it seemed as though the Rockets were going to take their foot off the gas, and it was here that the Microlights let them know that they were a proud team, and were still very much in this. They worked the ball well in low, before Eric Hughes blasted a shot from about twenty yards just by the outstretched arm of Corey Hennis to cut the deficit to 2-1 in the 24th minute. Afterwards, we saw a lot of midfield play, before in the 44th minute, the Rockets dealt a huge blow. Ofedestan would have loved to have it just 2-1 going into the break, but a brilliant pass from Alex Parnett to Jeremy McAllister connected, and J-Mac found the back of the net, for his second of the game, giving Newmanistan a 3-1 lead at the half.

During the intermission, Brian Carson was very happy with the performance of the team. Newmanistan had a 67-33 possession advantage, so no real adjustments were necessary other then to simply keep on doing what they were doing. Though he did stress not letting up, as the Microlights looked to be a very feisty group and would capitalize if the Rockets slipped.

Ofedestan picked up the offensive pace early in the half, and dominated possession for the first 10 minutes, getting 5 shots on target. However, all five were turned aside by Corey Hennis. His goalkeeping seemed to gradually drain more life out of them, and in the 59th minute, on the counterattack, the Rockets put their stamp on the game. Alex Parnett scored from about thirty yards on a shot with a perfect arc, and Newmanistan was up 4-1. Not to long later, in the 65th minute, Jeremy McAllister would complete his hat trick by smoothly sliding a shot low and to right of Jenkins. Up 5-1, the Rockets made their three substitutions, giving Brent Treichler, Shannon Vilardi, and Matt Caufield some playing time, becoming the first time that the Vilardi twins were on the pitch together for the national club. Shannon got a great chance in the 79th minute, but was turned aside by Jenkins. The Microlights played for pride late, and in the 88th minute, got one close on Eric Hughes’ second of the game. We would end 5-2.

Here’s some post game reactions:

Carson: “We executed the game plan really well today, and did what we needed to which was to jump on these guys early. By doing that we let them know that we were on top form tonight.”

Brooker: “Just a great game all around, I wish we wouldn’t have allowed that last goal by them, but that’s how it goes. We had a lot of respect for them, and maybe they wish we didn’t!”

Secrist: “I’m proud that we beat these guys. With the Fujisawan Territories up next, this could have been a let down game for us, but it wasn’t. Great job.”

Parnett: “We should all be proud of what we accomplished today. There’s no such thing as an easy three points.”

McAllister: “We saw a lot of life, and a lot of character from them, and if we let them think they could beat us, we would be in trouble. So it was our goal to score quick, get ahead. Going up 2-nil fast really set the tone for the game, and then the goal right before halftime was huge. Now we can prepare for the Territories.”

As the players alluded too, the Fujisawan Territories are next. And we should remember them quite well, as after all, it is the two teams that played for the last Di Bradini Cup renewing their acquaintances in what is probably one of the most anticipated matches of the entire Di Bradini Cup.

Grán Víe, Fedala
The longest, widest and most vibrant street in the ‘historic center’ [not that Fedala, built as the modern capital of the Empire only a decade or so earlier had much history] was at what probably was its maximum capacity. Tourists and locals alike waved the white and black flag of the Second Empire in joy, glee and ecstasy. Thousands upon thousands of different people, of different races and nationalities, moved up and down the boulevard, waiving flags, holding electric torches or eating while heading to their destination. Only during national holidays had the streets been seen like this, and today was no national holiday. The Empire’s U-21 national football team had tied against the group favorite, Candelaria and Marquez, in an exciting game which ended with six goals scored total. After the previous match’s results – a two to one loss against Starblaydia – most fans expected another defeat, although most assumed that Mika D’Angíel would score once. But, Mika had not only scored once, he had scored twice and once more by Luí Gasapor, the striker who replaced Werst Bry. In other words, the national team had not shown the opposition that they could score, they had shown the world that they could score and keep themselves in the game until the end. This tie certainly increased hopes for an eventual victory over the team’s next rival, Kenavt, and it made every fan feel as if the team was ‘one of the big ones’.

Kenavt’s bad luck, on the other hand, had not run out. The team had lost three to one against Candelaria and Marquez, the team the Empire had just managed to tie, while their second game proved to be worse – a four to one loss against Jerusalem! However, this poor track record was not enough to persuade the Macabee team of the potentiality of an easy win. Their game against Candelaria and Marquez perhaps ended well, but it also illustrated a large number of weaknesses in the team. For example, there were few teams which could score three goals and also allow three goals – the opposing team had the same issue, but what was relevant for the Macabees was their own team. There would have to be a lot of hard training to overcome this defensive weakness, as if Kenavt’s strikers proved to be ambitious there was large risks of having a number of balls enter the Macabee net. Certainly, two heavily offensive minded teams with poor defenses – as both The Macabees and Kenavt had proved to have – normally scored many goals on each other; it made for more interesting games for the spectators, but also proved a very stressful ninety minutes for the players. Besides, all this training to become a superior team to Kenavt was more than necessary, given that after Kenavt the Empire had to attempt a victory against Lovisa – another team with much bad luck. Furthermore, the team would need all the training it could get for the ultimate game against Jeruselem.

But all the technicalities and ‘mistakes’ and what made football boring went right over the heads of those who were celebrating in the Grán Víe, in the center of Fedala. By this time of night, most men had pints of beer in their hand, the golden-white froth spilling over the lips of their glasses and the golden beer bubbling. The women, most of which were less interested in the game, were there more to see if they could catch a good man for the night, or to go dancing at any of the dozens of night clubs which peppered the center of the large Macabee capital – a city who’s population had grown to over one hundred million after the end of the War of Golden Succession. In the starless night sky, the empty, dark blue void was being filled with streaking rockets, unleashing a myriad of wonderful colors – red, orange and tints of yellow, as well as green and indigo. All the colors one could imagine were painting the sky, creating a beautiful mural of celebration and happiness. For most, a tie was nothing to celebrate, but after two years of war the people of Fedala – and the Empire as a whole – needed something to celebrate and something to give hope. The post-war period, to date, was difficult and most had to work very hard to make their living, especially as the millions living in the south had decided to move north, where the war had had less of an impact . Such a tie, against what were the group favorites, gave enough hope for these people to justify a celebration – most would gladly do it again if the team managed to win the next game.

Maht Jestol was a young aficionado of the sport and had taken a keen interest in the Di Bradini Cup. The hope of seeing his team score against Candelaria and Marquez had given him enough of a reason to go out with some friends to see the game at a local bar, although the great breaded squid rings served at the bar were also enough of a reason. He had enjoyed all three goals equally as much during the game, although the performance of the team had also given minor hopes that they could have actually won the game – but, it was best to be pragmatic. Regardless, he and his buddies were out in the Grán Víe, with everybody else, partying and taking advantage of the festivities. Several bar tenders had put up ‘stations’ outside of their doors, offering free pints of beer if people entered the bar and had something to eat. Others offered free beer just due to their glee, although they would probably wake up the next morning and wish they had never done so – most bar tenders in the mainland Empire were penny pinchers, but it made sense after the travesty of the War of Golden Succession. The local communist syndicate [yes, a very rare sight to see the communist syndicates in the open] were even offering free food, although most took advantage to gain seconds, thirds or even fourths. But, at this point most were too drunk to care about anything, really. This did not discount Maht Jestol, either.

The young man put his right arm over his friend’s shoulder and said, ‘I’ll bet you ten quid that the next game is ours.’

His friend wasn’t so sure and raised his eyebrow and then responded, ‘Well, you know that every time it seems we have a chance our hopes our dashed, unless we literally take our future into our own hands. The only thing this Empire can win is war, and even then we still lose. I think I’ll meet your ten quid.’

Maht chucked, ‘Yea, but this is Kenavt.’ He slurred the name, given the fact that nobody really knew how to pronounce the name of the nation, let alone where the nation was located or really who anybody inside the nation was. ‘If we lost against Kenavt, I promise I won’t ever watch football again. I mean, how can we tie against what we considered the number one team in the group and lose against what is probably one of the worst?’

The friend laughed and said, ‘You’re talking about football. Nobody knows what happens half of the time. The worst teams have put the best teams in their place – out of the sky. If I were you, I wouldn’t make statements such as those, or you might repent!’

But, to be honest, everyone was thinking the same thing. This was the terrible part of doing well (well, ‘doing well’ is relative term, after all) – it brought hope. Hope, most of the time, led to dashed dreams, which led to sad citizens. But, this was part of the game and life in general; not everybody could have everything, after all. The spectators watching the game against Kenavt would be many more than those that watched the first game, against Starblaydia, and even more than those that watched the game against Candelaria and Marquez. Ultimately, this was the Empire’s first chance to pull off a victory and few would miss it. If the team failed this would mean more disheartened fans – another year of failure – but if the team prevailed it would elevate the Empire’s spirits to a level which had never been reached since May 2016 (the beginning of the war). This should be put into the context of the times, given that this was the era in which everything was ‘returning to normal’ – tourism in the Empire had climbed once again, although the southern regions were still unpopulated and bare, while Fedala itself was hosting half of the teams of the Second International Futsal Competition – something which was bound to sell out, both because of the small number of seats available (a median of ten thousand per stadium) and due to the amount of citizens and tourists which were now thrilled with the Di Bradini Cup – in the end, football and futsal were almost the same thing, right? In any case, what the 5th Di Bradini Cup meant for the Empire was hope, money and a return to prior glory.

Tíengor Training Grounds, Starblaydia
Coach Vadíern seemed more violent and less friendly than usual; the draw had gotten to his head, and now the man was clearly focused on winning the next two games. Despite previously thinking that the cup was lost, now Vadíern believed that if Fortune was on the team’s side he could get the team to the finals, and perhaps even to victory. Although the Empire’s team could only count on a single point, thanks to their draw, and Starblaydia and Jeruselem both had six points – thanks to their victories in both matches – these two teams were now going to hit a rougher road, playing tougher opponents. In fact, Starblaydia was playing Jeruselem in the next match, which would automatically mean that one would take the clear lead while the other would stay behind [unless there was a draw, in which case the cup was probably still up for grabs]. Candelaria and Marquez was playing Lovisa, and most automatically assumed that this would be a victory for Candelaria and Marquez, given Lovisa’s past track record. If the two previous team tied it was possible to have a three-way tie for first, while ideally The Macabees would have four points [three points of a theoretical victory against Kenavt and one point for the draw against Candelaria and Marquez]. Of course, it was better if one of the two first teams lost, instead of tied, but one couldn’t hope for everything. Regardless, although the chances of becoming second in the group were rather low, there were still minor hopes [assuming Jeruselem lost and The Macabees won, that would be four to six points, while The Macabees would have to win both against Lovisa and then against Jeruselem – a difficult task, but perhaps possible].

The most important task, at this point, was to prepare the defense. Most thought that the Empire had two games to ‘take it easy’, so to speak, and to take the time to train up to prepare for the ultimate game against Jeruselem – the game which most thought would be what decided the fate of the Empire in the Di Bradini Cup. Heló Catul had injured himself during the game, which although he could still play it meant that the defense was handicapped – perhaps what had cost them the two goals (Heló injured himself after the first goal). He would be replaced by Franz Klein, which had no game play experience, and so Franz was being trained to the death. Drills, drills, drills – these were the orders for the day. Defenders would have to drill with strikers; both would have to perfect their art. The strikers were actually not that well off; Mika D’Angíel had managed his second and third goal in the cup, while Luí Gasapor had put in his first goal in an international competition. All in all, to date the team had put in four goals, which high hopes for a lot more in the coming three matches. The midfields had performed respectively in both games, although Vadíern saw the necessity of greater cooperation between the midfields and the strikers, especially as he planned to change the team’s strategy from offensive minded to defensive minded in the game with Jeruselem – the strikers were ambitious enough to allow some men to focus more on defense.

‘Klein, DEFEND!’ The coach was offering no quarter this time; everything was at stake now. The team’s success had changed the entire aura of their first cup. ‘Klein, don’t just look at the damn ball, take it! Guys, we need to learn how to RECOVER. This is the key! You can’t let them get close enough to shoot, because then we’re taking a risk. If something is in stake, fowl.’ Vadíern also knew something many others didn’t. Scouts were looking at certain players for the national team for the World Cup, especially Mika D’Angíel, and any success story like this would give Vadíern something good to put down in his resumé.

‘Luí, stop bullshitting and pass the ball!’ Luí had shown a tendency to try too much tiki-taka in an attempt to emulate Mika’s style, but only Mika was really good at what he did. Luí was an accurate shot, though, which meant that Vadíern preferred that Mika set up the pass and give Luí the shot – they were a very powerful duo if used right, and Vadíern hoped to bring in one of the better shooting midfielders to provide some sort of a trio for the next two games, but he wasn’t sure who though, yet. In any case, as aforementioned, he always also looking at a more defensive style of game play against Jeruselem, with his two strikers doing most of the ambitious offensive work. What was clear was that no matter the result there was a lot of hard work ahead – most of these boys would be available for the next Di Bradini Cup, and so this round still served as a training cup for the next one, where Vadíern truly hoped to take his team onto victory.

Necessary statistics:


[b]Nation - GP GW GT GL PF PA PTS
Jerusalem - 2 2 0 0 6 1 6
Starblaydia - 2 2 0 0 4 1 6
Candelaria and Marquez - 2 1 1 0 6 3 4
The Macabees - 2 0 1 1 4 5 1
Lovisa - 2 0 0 2 0 4 0
Kenavt - 2 0 0 2 2 7 0

The Unaclaimed Newspaper

Young Knights defeat Pablicosta 1-nil

Last night the young U21 Purple Knights lived up to there potentials. Finally. They defeat the Pablicostan squad 1-0 in a close defensive game. The knights one of an Axe Lewis goal on a Chuck the Duck assist.

*Good news fans were coming out with a new name. The Taeshan Inquirer. The change will start at the beginning of next year.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SFA-Logo.gif
West Starblaydia's 5th Di Bradini Cup Roster
In celebration of union.

The Staff
PP. Peter Ponti, 43
RC. Raymond Constable, 46

The Goalkeepers
1. Juan Garcia, 19, GK (capt)
13. Ross Devonti, 20, GK
22. David Usher, 17, GK

The Defenders
3. Thomas Parichev, 21, RB
12. Christian Bianchi, 20, RB
4. Michael Thijssen, 18, CB
5. Justin Wooliscroft, 19, CB
19. Graham Berger, 17, CB
15. Jason Hitake, 19, CB
2. Edson, 20, LB
23. Lionel Holden, 16, LB

The Midfielders
4. Gary Moon, 19, CM
7. Keith Dagha, 20, CM
18. Simon Bond, 17, CM
14. Santor Pirie, 19, CM

The Wingers
11. Dalian Smith, 18, RW
21. Robert Mawhinney, 20, RW
8. Jae-Sun Kim, 18, LW
16. Norman Forrester, 19, LW

The Forwards
9. Casper Smith, 20, CF
10. Cameron Lillicrap, 19, CF
17. Dennis Sciandri, 17, CF
20. Scott McGuinness, 19, CF

The Formation
Garcia

Parichev Thijssen Wooliscroft Edson

Moon Dagha
D. Smith Kim

C. Smith Lillicrap

Home And Away Kits:
Kits created by:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg
http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/WC40/WsbHome4.jpg http://i292.photobucket.com/albums/mm1/Starblayde/WC40/WsbAway4.jpg

Hwang: BOO! BOO!

Wang: What the %$#^? What's wrong now?

Hwang: They just scored another goal!

Wang: *glances at the screen* Don't worry, we're still up by one goal. And it's only 10 minutes until the end of the match. Geez, people like you belong in an asylum.

Hwang: Did I tell that I had the chance to be on the Imperial Football Team?

Wang: For the 5436th time! YES! And what the %$#^ does that have to do with an asylum?

Hwang: They're all crazy, you know. Who goes around whacking a leather balloon with their head? I'd just as easily pick it up with my hand. And why a net? Seems to be that the object of football should be to whack people's heads with it.

Wang: Well, I'm not sure which is more freakish.

Hwang: BOO! Penalty! Penalty!

Wang: What's wrong now?

Hwang: The opposing fans threw an empty bottle at Kim Yongji, and the referee isn't doing anything about it!

Wang: The referee manages the match, not the fans. That's something that the police take care of. At least, in some world. What the hell happened on that field?

Hwang: Oh, a flock of pigs was flying overhead earlier in the match and shit all over the Gwaine goal. Got some of the Gwaine fans too, the %$#^ers.

Wang: You need to stop watching this. *reaches for button*

Hwang: NO! *stops him, presses another button - a loud explosion ensues*

Wang: What the %$#^ did we just press?

Hwang: I don't know.

SUPER: *croaks*

Wang: %$#^. They're turned into frogs.

Hwang: Awesome! My boss is a frog!

Wang: No, he's not. We're going to fix it. Well... I am at least. *presses button*

SUPER: *croaks*

Hwang: He's not not a frog.

Wang: Shit, he's in the room! We've got to get him out of here! Quickly! *runs to put the frog out of the room* Don't press the button!

Hwang: What did you say?

Wang: Don't press the button!

Hwang: You want to repeat that?

Wang: *muffled "don't"* PRESS THE BUTTON!

Hwang: Okay. *presses button* Now, why did you want me to press the button.

Wang: *baas*

Hwang: Cool! A sheep!

SUPER: *still a frog* You idiot! You've turned us all into animals! Change us back really quickly! Wait. Where did Wang go?

Hwang: I don't know. He went out to fix things.

Wang: *nibbles on SUPER*

SUPER: *croaks* Stop that!

Hwang: Wait! That's a talking frog!

SUPER: I'm not a frog! I'm your supervisor!

Hwang: Ah, poor frog. Doesn't know that it's a frog.

SUPER: Change me back before I change you into a goat!

Hwang: Hmm, I wonder what that would be like.

SUPER: *hops onto the control panel, pressing a button*

Wang: *baas*

Hwang: We can't hit the button if the door is unlocked.

Wang: *baas and closes the door*

Hwang: Okay. Now we can.

SUPER: *hops on button again* Oh, what the %$#^? There's a flock baby-carrying storks flying en route to the Han Empire! We can't have these babies! Intercept them!

Hwang: A frog wants to intercept storks? But storks are a protected species!

SUPER: Not in my book. *presses button - storks are intercepted over Candelaria And Marquez* Oh, I'll never hear the end of this. The Office of Paranormal Activities is going to be irate.

Wang: *baas*

Hwang: Wait, you're Wang?

SUPER: Of course, you idiot! Now, when we get out of this room, hit that button and don't do anything else!

Hwang: Okay. *SUPER and Hwang leave room - presses button*

Wang: *now human* I'm going to kill you!

Hwang: GOAL!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! *hits button*

Wang: I really am going to kill you! *chokes Hwang*

SUPER: What the %$#^ just happened? One moment I'm a frog, and now there's a parade of Lesbians walking around in Jeruselem?

Hwang: Actually, they're homosexual ladies according to a recent judicial inquiry.

SUPER: I don't get you people anymore.

Hwang: Well, that was an exciting match, wouldn't you say?

Wang: I think there's one thing we can all learn from all of this.

Hwang: What?

Wang: God must really hate Candelaria And Marquez...

When the final second ticked off the clock all Gwaine could do was watch as their improbable fell flat on its face. After a 4-0 start by Daehanjeiguk, Gwaine kickstarted the second half with a head goal by Markis Rudinsky. Thirty minutes into the half Jonathan Rone scored his second of the tournament after a perfectly placed pass from Madeline Gretz. The questionable moment of the game was when a Daehanjeiguk player took down Lisa Ray awkwardly forcing her to leave the game early in the first half, but she did return at the start of the second. In all it was a great game, and Gwaine showed they have the heart needed to beat superior teams.

Gwaine is now 1-1 in the 5th Di Bradini Cup.

Hoji Metropolitan Daily Record
Fujisawan Territories anticipate struggle in match versus Newmanistan

Everyone in the Fujisawan Territories is eagerly anticipating the upcoming rematch of the 4th Di Bradini Cup final against Newmanistan, and the Fujisawan Territories have managed a 2-2 draw against Cafundeu and a 2-0 win over Bazalonia to start things off.

Cafundeu dominated the first half of the first match, and Dênis Conte Alves scored in the fortieth minute for Cafundeu. The Territories came to life in the second half with scores by Kenzan Go in the sixty first and sixty sixth minute. Alves scored once more for Cafundeu in the seventy eighth minute to force the draw.

And in the second match, Ginko Kawaii and Shojiro Takemago provided the scores for the Territories in their 2-0 win over Bazalonia in the thirteenth and forty third minutes respectively.

Coach Shizuha Komine says she has been receiving plenty of helpful advice from her uncle Jotaro Komine, who coached the 4th Di Bradini Cup team. “I’m going to need that advice and confidence because I’m a little overwhelmed by the prospect of playing Newmanistan. It’s not the same team we had last time round. And I want to do good in his [Jotaro Komine] eyes,” she said.

And while it should be an entertaining match, most Fujisawans have succumbed to the reality that this is not the miracle team of the 4th Di Bradini Cup, that this team is not invincible. That the Territories don’t have a chance against Newmanistan. Still, the entire Di Bradini Cup gives Fujisawans a pleasant distraction from the hostile political climate and rough times in the Territories.

Ever since the group draw, the upcoming match has been the most anticipated, but even some of the players themselves are having doubts that they’re ready for Newmanistan.

“Having played Newmanistan before in the final and losing to them, I...I have a lot of respect for them, but they’re such a talented team. And I think we have no way to beat them or to match up with them. They’re the team to beat..and we can’t beat them,” said midfielder Ginko Kawaii.

“Last time, there was a perfect storm. We bonded very strongly as a team and everything came together as we went on. This time, we’ve got too many new faces and we have too many directions we can take this team. So we kind of have to identify ourselves again and separate ourselves from the 4th Di Bradini Cup team,” Deanna Distefano said following the Bazalonia match.

“We’re preparing for the match against Newmanistan but this will be a test of how well we match against an elite team. If we focus one game at a time, frankly, this is the biggest match on our schedule. This is everything,” head coach Shizuha Komine said.

No matter how the match plays out, it will be looked back upon as the defining moment in the Territories 5th Di Bradini Cup campaign.

The Microlight Times

Microlights make 2-Goal Stand Against Rockets

The Ofedestan Microlights managed to score 2 consolations in their Di Bradini match against the Newmanistan Rockets, who regrettably managed 5. Hughes was on a roll that day, scoring twice, in the 24th and 88th minutes. Although we were the losing team, we held our head high in our search for goals. Coach Jake Newton said that "although we lost, it was not quite as bad a result as was feared here, and for us to manage 2 goals against the reigning champions was quite amazing for a newcomer" and "We will not let this blemish our campaign for the Di Bradini Cup, and for us, it is not all about winning the Cup, but about keeping the spirit of Di Bradini alive". Hughes, the lucky double goalscorer, said that "it was a really great experience, you know, playing against such a talented team. We didn't really expect to win, and the result was not as bad as we feared. Scoring 2 goals against them was a just wicked, knowing that it is not impossible to". Schmidt, the captain, said that "The whole team did great, I'm sure everyone learnt something, and this will surely help us play better in the future".

Next up is Elves Security Forces, who were beaten by the Jets, and might be slightly easier. But we know not to expect a pushover in any match, and will be vigorously training, with the strategy of ******* ***** *******.


OFS

(Rockets players gather in hotel meeting room)

Brooker: Hey guys, you see this?

McAllister: What?

Brooker: Was just browsing the internet a little bit, and out of curiousity, I checked out the site for the Microlight Times. You know, the Ofedestan team?

McAllister: Ok, so what about it?

Brooker: Seems to me we are the Newmanistan “Jets” to them. After we were so respectful of them, they go butcher our team name like that.

Secrist: It was probably just an innocent mistake, or done intentionally, since Rockets and Jets are somewhat similar.

Brooker: No they’re not. There’s a big difference between a Jet and a Rocket. And besides, it was done twice.

Secrist: It’s really not a big deal, Jeremy. It’s ok.

McAllister: Don’t forget in the Cup of Harmony when Taeshan omitted Nire and Nire from a group prediction, Nire and Nire got so pissed off about it that they declared war on Taeshan. This kind of thing can be taken seriously.

Drummond: I doubt there will be outrage in Newmanistan over it. Nobody at home probably reads the Microlight Times. They’re nice guys, we can let it slide.

McAllister: We know the media can suck sometimes, it has nothing to do with the team. Let’s just drop it. And talk about my hat trick.

Drummond: Yay J-Mac. Ok, now let’s talk about the Fujisawan Territories.

Secrist: The Territories are different. They don’t seem like the same team without Sakura Jo.

McAllister: Sakura’s awesome, I wonder why they didn’t bring her back, she would still be eligible.

Brooker: Southport never held her back. She’s done a great job for the Tigers since she’s been there.

McAllister: Who here plays for Southport?
Drummond: Just our hero Treichler.

Brooker: Yo Brent, get over here.

Treichler: What’s up?

McAllister: Did they say where that guy was from that broke into our equipment storage room?

Treichler: Nope, they are being very tight lipped about the whole thing.

Drummond: Figures, no matter what country you’re in, someone’s always gotta protect the criminals.

McAllister: Anyway we were wondering since you played for Southport, if you know Sakura Jo isn’t on the Fujisawan Territories national team?

Treichler: She wanted to focus on her studies, and I think the Territories just wanted to showcase some other athletes. Her sister is an assistant there.

Brooker: Cool I supposed but still, well, her choice I guess.

Treicher: She’s very happy with it.

McAllister: And that’s what matters. Playing against them again will be fun.

Drummond: They seem down about the matchup.

McAllister: Oh that’s just for the press. Trust me, the players aren’t down about the matchup. They don’t call them Warriors for nothing.

J Vilardi: I like Fujisawan Territories, they got a lot of females on their roster. This nation is a leader in promoting gender equality in sports. They’re great!

Drummond: I figured you would notice that Jenn. I’ve noticed the amount of women too, but for different reasons. Deanna Distefano. Mmmmm.

J Vilardi: Can’t you ever just look at them as just football players?

Drummond: I do, when necessary. When not necessary I don’t. (Laughs, as do others who hear the remark). Like right now with you, I’m thinking about how cute you look trying to make that point in your training gear.

J Vilardi: Men.... why bother.

THE EMPIRE TIMES

STRONG PERFORMANCE CONTINUES

The eaglets have made it two wins in a row during the 5th Di-Bradini Cup, managing to beat Nethertopia 3-2 last night following a resounding 3-0 win over Krytenia (now West Starblaydia, read more on pg. 9 and 74). This keeps the Empire on top of the group ladder with a total of six points and a goal difference of five. Manager Jack Copper believes that the team can continue this good form throughout the tournament.

The game started well for the eaglets with the Christopher Speed scoring in the 3rd minute from 32 yards out that managed to slip through the hands of Netheropia keeper Edwin Tol. During the first half the Eaglets had 75% possession with the ball out of their defensive third for 89% of the time. The eaglets managed 12 shots on goal however due to poor accuracy and some amazing saves by Tol no goals were able to be scored.

The second half started much as the first with Issac Golding scoring the teams second goal 30 seconds after kick off. Nethertopia took the game to the Eaglets and picked up the pace, giving the Empire defence a much needed workout, Nethertopia managed to get 8 shots on goal during the second half with accuracy of 100%, which tested Alex Burner’s abilities. In the 75th minute a goal by Nethortopian striker Bob Mols, they quickly scored again in the 77th minute this time by Wim den Hoof off a corner, bringing the game to a 2-2 draw. The two teams traded shots on goals as the clock counted down but in the 91st minute Golding off a cross from Ross Millsop giving the Eaglets the win and taking with them another three points.

The Eaglets next play Yarfor 2, a strong team who has three points after a win against Agroprom in the first round. Manager Copper is said to be confident of the game saying that the team has been going through its training sessions getting better and better every minute. Captain Alex Burner said “There is no denying that all the games we play in this Cup will difficult, and we can never slow down because it will be during that moment where we will lose. I know that myself and everybody else on the side will never back down and we will push our hardest at all times”.

Toju Konae: Welcome back to The Toju Konae Show...my next guests are the Prime Minister of the Fujisawan Territories herself, Sanami Ienari, and daughter Kinuko Ienari, and we’re going to talk politics and zeokit. Ladies and gentlemen...Prime Minister Sanami Ienari

[wild applause]

TK continued: and World Cup 40 player Kinuko Ienari

[applause continues]

Prime Minster Ienari and Kinuko Ienari enter the set, and smile and wave to the audience before taking seats.

PM Ienari: I just want to take this time to thank you for this opportunity and I want to thank all of the people in this great nation who have supported me over the years. Thank you.

TK: Indeed. You look like you’re in good spirits, both of you. That’s great to see.

PM Ienari: Thank you.

TK: Now, I have a lot of questions that I’m really eager to ask you, Mrs. Prime Minister. I don’t know where to begin, but I guess I’ll start with asking you...how should I phrase this? Your husband Taisuke has been described as the Bill Clinton of the Fujisawan Territories and together, you both have been described as dream Socialist Party establishment politicians. How do you...what is your reaction to those kinds of labels?

PM Ienari: Well, to answer the first part of your question, we’re not the Clintons, nor are we like them. I understand the comparison but I want to distance ourselves from that. You know, we have our own identity in our own country. Being in close proximity to North America in general, and with the American influence on our culture, especially in the political process, I can see how those types of comparisons are drawn. I don’t think they’re accurate. It kind of bothers me that we’re being portrayed as similar, but what we’re doing is turning this country around. Look at the latest economic numbers out today. Unemployment is down to six percent.

[applause]

PM Ienari continued: Unemployment is down to six percent, consumer confidence is up, workforce enthusiasm is up...so we’re really turning this economy and this country around. So it’s not about our image, it’s about what we’re doing for this country. I don’t really care about drawing comparisons to foreign leaders. What I care about is fixing education, healthcare, and strengthening our nation’s military. And as for being a Socialist Party establishment politician, I have always been loyal to the Socialist Party, even when at times the party turned it’s back on me.

[applause]

TK: And that’s the kind of leader I think we need. Now, those are some encouraging economic numbers. Also I think...I think the Antilles Yent is almost as strong as the US dollar at this point.

PM Ienari: It’s getting there.

TK: Slowly but surely. I have to tell you the Kawa administration didn’t leave us with much. I have to ask you though, is Taisuke Ienari planning to run for Prime Minister in the near future?

PM Ienari: No. He’s committed to the Socialist Party and I think when he left the Iwosaka Territorial Governor’s office, he decided that was the last public office he was going to hold. Though he’s going to continue working closely with the Socialist Party on a number of issues, so he’s going be stay an active member of this party.

TK: Fair enough. Now it’s been said that you were the Prime Minister that was never supposed to be, you were tapped for the position while working in the Kawa administration, when Prime Minister Yukino Kawa was assassinated by an anti-government faction. And the Territories has had back to back female Prime Ministers. That’s prompted some to say that the Socialist Party is attempting to use female candidates as a means of sex appeal, in other words using sex appeal to sell a hardcore agenda.

PM Ienari: Well let me just say that the Territories has had male leadership since it’s inception, and it wasn’t until 1996 when we had our first female Prime Minister. There are countries in the world who have never had female leadership, so this is something you should be proud of. The Territories have been a male chauvinist society for quite some time and have only really opened up to gender equality since the late 1990's and I credit that with Prime Minister Kawa. Listen, the Socialist Party has real world solutions to real world problems, and we may do things that the public may not like but that are necessary, you know, especially with things like national security, and I categorically dismiss the notion that the party is using the women of the party to push unpopular agendas on people that otherwise wouldn’t stand any ground. We’ve accomplished a lot, and that’s what people should focus on. I was a political longshot, and before Prime Minister Kawa was assassinated, I never would have considered being Prime Minister.

TK: Well that brings up a lot of good topics to discuss but I want to get Kinuko in on this conversation. Kinuko, there’s been rumors going around that some teams in the Di Bradini Cup are commenting about the number of female players on some of the zeokit rosters that the Fujisawan Territories have sent to the various international tournaments. They’re saying that there’s an overwhelming number especially with this Di Bradini Cup. And some here have said that they want a more balanced team. Your thoughts?

Kinuko Ienari: Well, I think...you know, women in the Territories don’t have as big a stage as men when it comes to sports and the international teams are where the female athletes in the Territories get to shine. And you see professional male athletes getting paid more than doctors and teachers, and professional female athletes get paid many more times less than their male counterparts. The opportunities aren’t there for women, so I think this is an ideal opportunity for them to make it in the international tournaments. I have heard that they want a 11-12 ratio on the international rosters, which is what they have right now in the Di Bradini Cup, twelve females and eleven males. And out of the starters, six are male, and five are female. So when you consider that, it’s evenly divided really. Players like Sakura Jo and Izukoza Yoko have really opened up doors for female players in this country.

TK: And I think some of the initiatives that have come through Parliament, like approving funding for a study by University of Hoji medical students to determine the most common scenarios for anterior cruciate ligament tears in female athletes, and the recommendations that were implemented after the study...the legislation that ultimately failed to pass that would have put a cap on how much male professional athletes are able to be paid, and would have required equal pay for professional female athletes...what I’m saying is that I see a real concern for the benefit of female athletes in the Fujisawan Territories.

PM Ienari: Yes, and the study that you’re referring to was much overdue. Female athletes tear their ACL five to one over male athletes in the Territories, so it is a big concern. Many risk factors were identified. Long story short, what we did when the study was complete was we received recommendations, and we formed new legislation based upon that. Now female athletes at the high school level and college level have to have their knee strength tested and female athletes who have had more than one ACL tear playing sports are ineligible to play with any high school or university team. People made a big uproar because a player like Ginko Kawaii would be ineligible. But since the legislation wasn’t passed retroactively, Ginko is still playing. It wouldn’t have affected her 4th and 5th Di Bradini Cup appearances, but she wouldn’t have been able to play at the university level. But Ginko Kawaii is an injury prone player and what our aim is, is to identify players most at risk for these kinds of injuries, so we can work to bring those numbers down. It’s a learning process. And...I’m not rather sure why that second bit of legislation you mentioned hasn’t passed. It seems like the right thing to do.

KI: I just want to add that I know a lot of people who have had ACL tears. I myself tore my MCL a few years ago playing basketball so I know how big a problem knee injuries are among female athletes, and how needed this study was.

TK: And I think that was a step in the right direction certainly for female athletes all throughout the country. Now, I wanted to get back into some of the other accomplishments of your administration. You just got that artificial sweetener ban into law, and now the soft drink industry wants to sue the federal government because they can’t sell diet soft drinks now, anyway, you have the artificial sweetener ban, performance based pay for teachers at all federally funded schools, you put an RFID tracking chip in all new credit cards to track credit cards that have been reported stolen, you’ve got the steroids ban, you’ve partially overturned prohibition so now it’s legal to sell everything but hard liquor...so I’m well aware of your accomplishments toward fulfilling your agenda. Some of the legislation has been controversial, so I want to give you an opportunity to explain yourself.

PM Ienari: Well, with the artificial sweetener ban, as I’ve said before, artificial sweeteners have been linked with many health problems, including many types of cancers, and we wanted to take a proactive solution toward better health.

TK: Pardon the interruption but playing devil’s advocate here, say that some people feel like the government is invading into their private lives, in this case telling them what kinds of things the can and cannot have in their diets, that’s a reasonable assumption yes?

PM Ienari: We have a responsibility to take products that cause significant damage to the public’s health off the markets. Read the research for yourself...artificial sweeteners cause cancer when consumed in large amounts. People who drink a lot of diet soda or put artificial sweetener in their coffee every morning are susceptible without even knowing it.

TK: Well...it seems that a lot of Conservatives were against the ban, but there was just barely enough support to push it through.

PM Ienari: And I thank the ones who saw the need to ban artificial sweeteners. Listen, I’m not going to bend over and apologize to the soft drink industry because I am taking measures to protect the safety of the public’s health. You mentioned the RFID chips in the credit cards. We did that so that if you report a credit card stolen, we can track it down, and make an arrest on whoever is in possession of it. And I know the conspiracy theorists out there say we’re using the chips to monitor where you bank and your financial movements. That’s not true. We have seen, and the Hoji Police Department reports, an eighty percent reduction in credit card theft following this new legislation. So we have proactive, real world solutions to the problems of our time.

TK: Indeed, and I think a lot of the criticism you’ve drawn has been unfair. People just want to smear you for their own gain. Kinuko, what has it been like being the daughter of the prime minister?

KI: It’s been an amazing experience, and I’m using it to better myself as a person and it’s opened up possibilities that I never could have imagined. I’m eventually looking into a career in politics when my zeokit days are over. But there have been so many highs and lows and you know, people like to attack my parents both verbally and physically. They tried to kill my mom three times already. It’s really scary to know that someone can take her life at any moment but that’s part of politics. You know, it hurts when I hear and I read the negative press about my mom and what she’s doing. They even try to drag my dad into things, but like he told me, it’s just part of politics.

TK: I agree, and I think you're dad is a wise man. Well I want to thank you both for coming on the show. Good luck Kinuko with your future endeavors and in upcoming World Cups. And much luck and thanks for all that you do for us, Prime Minister.

PM Ienari: Thank you.

KI: Thanks for having us.

SUPER: What the %$#^ are you people doing?

Hwang: What?

Wang: Yeah, what?

SUPER: The Imperial Office of Paranormal activities noted that Sorthern Northland just disappeared! And sure as %$#^, we didn't do it.

Hwang: What about the Bostonians?

Wang: Bostopians, Hwang.

SUPER: What about them? They're all happy.

Wang: Wait, the Bostopians didn't destroy Sorthern Northland? We just saw them rig the elections in Casari!

SUPER: The Casarans actually elected the Bostopian Prime Minister as a joke really. Oh, and by the way, be prepared for a mass exodus from Casari soon. Do what you need to keep them away from our shores.

Wang: Why?

SUPER: They're freaky cricket-eaters.

Hwang: They're gay?

SUPER: No... I have no clue what you're talking about.

Wang: Nothing, sir. Ummm, so what about Sorthern Northland?

Hwang: Oh, I know what we can do. Let's press this button! *presses button*

SUPER: Hwang, you idiot! The door's open! The buttons don't work if the door is open!

Wang: Doesn't matter. The machine's broke.

SUPER: What?!? You should have told me! Why didn't I know about this?

Wang: Um, you told us to fill out a work-order form.

SUPER: Well, did you?

Wang: It's sitting on your desk.

SUPER: *looks at clipboard* Oh. That must be this, then. Wang, I told you to fill it out, because I can't read anything that Hwang writes anymore. Must be that time he had his head switched around the other way.

Hwang: I had my head switched?

Wang: I wish.

SUPER: So right now you guys can't do anything?

Hwang: Except watch football.

Wang: And there's no football.

SUPER: You guys sound like you need a few hours outside the box.

Wang: But we can't go anywhere outside of the box.

SUPER: I need to find replacements for you two. Especially, you Hwang. We can't afford a loose cannon like you.

Wang: I think there might be a malfunction.

SUPER: Why?

Wang: The machine is nominating this week as "GOD BLESS BOSTOPIA" week...

SUPER: Heaven save us. We've got to get this machine fixed! Call out any contractor available! We might have to get a call from the Dreamed Realm or something like that...

Wang: Well, that's why we filled out the work order.

SUPER: What work order?

Wang: *sighs* Do you people even pay attention to work orders?

SUPER: I didn't know we used work orders.

Hwang: We do, we do! It's on the SOP! Whenever something gets broken, fill out a work order.

SUPER: I don't remember seeing that.

Wang: I think this coffee maker is broken.

SUPER: Okay. Don't forget to fill out a work order for that. *leaves*

Wang: No wonder nothing ever gets done here.

Hwang: Let me fill it out!

Wang: Okay...

Tourist: *picks up international copy of THE EMPIRE TIMES* "...Starblaydia, read more on pg. 9 and 74." Okay. *flips page* What the %$#^? That's the Jeruselem roster! *flips pages still* What the %$#^? That's some Fujisawan article! What the %$#^ is wrong with this place? *throws paper to the ground*

GAZETA DO POVO - O JORNAL DA NAÇÃO CAFUNDELENSE
Sports Section - Articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

SMALL IMPROVEMENT... NOT ENOUGH

Cafundéu's team in this Di Bradini Cup seems strong... in the paper. With many players considered future stars, everyone was confident that the team could maybe repeat the performance of the third edition of this same cup, when Cafundéu got the third place. But, after two games, the supporters feel that this probably won't happen. The first game, against Fujisawan Territories, ended in an unpleasant draw, and the same happened in the second one against Valanora.

Once again, both teams had offensive style, something that made the game full of goal chances, more exciting. This time, Cafundéu seemed a bit more offensive, and had the first opportunities with Alves, but he missed them. Valanora replied with good crossings, which ended in heading attempts. Salathiël made good saves. The first half ended without goals, but, in the second half, they would appear. The first one was scored by Túlio, who got the rebound after Abreu shot a free kick on the wall.

Valanora quickly replied, scoring a nice goal with Celebrindal, who hit the ball with a volley after a crossing from Súrion. Cafundéu took some minutes to create another goal chance. But the goal appeared in that one. Alves invaded the area, dribbled a defender but lost the ball to Lika. Hubert appeared, took the ball from Lika and shot to score (the Valanorans complained that it should be a foul over Lika). The Monopolists tried to secure the win, but Soler shot from outside the area and scored the draw goal.

CAFUNDÉU 2x2 VALANORA

Place: somewhere in Starblaydia.
Attendance: not released.
Referee: Filinto Gerhand (Lovisa).
MOTM: Fabinho (Cafundéu).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Montanha and Barba; Fabinho, Abreu (Marques 67') and Túlio (Rossi 67'); Hubert, Alves and Lacerda (Nando 45').
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/elves_security_forces.png VALANORA: Rewi; Lika, Deadleaf and Elensar; Jurangil, Redias, Thial (Celebrindal 45'), Ar-Feiniel (Meneldur 64') and Súrion; Love (Strise 71') and Soler.
Coach: Roki Sardan.

Goals:CAF: Túlio 58' , Hubert 75'.
VAL: Celebrindal 64' , Soler 82'.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – formation for game against Bazalonia: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Montanha and Barba; Fabinho, Abreu and Túlio; Hubert, Alves and Lacerda.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.
Style of +3

Match’s Referee: Visto Feito (Fmjphoenix).

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC goalscorers:

2- Alves
1- Hubert, Túlio

THE ROCKET REPORT

CARSON SUSPENDS WARRICK

Starblaydia- Breaking news from Starblaydia! As Newmanistan gets set to take on the Fujisawan Territories in a rematch of the Di Bradini Cup 4 championship, Brian Carson has suspended starting midfielder Alex Warrick indefinitely for “conduct detrimental to the team.” Reportedly, Warrick has been getting into trouble a few times since the team’s arrival in Starblaydia. Brian Carson issued this formal statement on the matter:

“It is decision of myself and assistant coach Chris Merrill (who by the way, is Warrick’s head coach at the club level and in full agreement of the decision), that we suspend Alex Warrick indefinitely as his attitude is not what we have come to expect from athletes representing Newmanistan in these interregional tournaments. We were going to try and keep it in house, but unfortunately it has reached a level where we must take this action, and we know by doing this, we would have all of you asking why, so we’re gonna beat you to it. Warrick was late to two practices prior to our match with Ofedestan, once by 45 minutes, and the other by an hour and a half. Sources tell me that each night, Alex was seen bringing women into his room at very late hours the night prior to his lateness the next morning. What he does with the women is his business, as long as he breaks no laws of course, but when it affects the team, which his lateness does, we must take action. Warrick was warned on the first occasion, and fined 20,000 gold coins for the second. However, this time, he simply did not show up for practice, and was again seen with four young women as late as 4am. He tells me he overslept. Well, I wonder why that was! Alex will be given a chance to make amends for his behavior and remain with the team, however, he will be downgraded to a “reserve” status. One more instance of bad behavior, and he will be sent back home. Matt Caufield, who started on our team last time, will now start again in his place, and Brian Rafferty will get upgraded from reserve to substitute. It is unfortunate that we had to do this, but we were left with no choice.”

Rockets players are supportive of the decision, with captain Jeremy McAllister stating, “There’s a time and a place for the extracurricular stuff, but you absolutely never let it interfere with football.” Steve Secrist agreed, “Coach all the time tells us that we are on a business trip. Which we are. Well, if you don’t show up to your appointments on a business trip, you’re probably going to get fired no matter how good you are at what you do. It’s too bad this had to happen and I hope that Alex can refocus himself on football.” And we were fortunate enough to get a comment from Mr. Warrick himself concerning the suspension. “Practice? We’re talking about practice?! What I do in the games is what matters. Practice?! Yeaaaaah.” Good luck with him, Brian!

Ever feel like you're hearing the same questions all the time? We at the Ministry of Information are. One question in particular:-

Who the hell are West Starblaydia?

Right then.

Once upon a time, there was a young politician named Dominique. She was born in Aigburth, in what was then called Krytenia. Now, Dominique was clever and cunning, and became President of Krytenia. Being President meant many things, one of which was meeting other national leaders. Leaders such as Tiberius Starblayde.

Dominique was instantly smitten, and it was love at first sight. Even Tiberius' apparent death couldn't stymie her infatuation, and when he returned, she wept with joy. Surprisingly, Tiberius reciprocated, and the pair began to date.

Two years ago, they got married in the social event of the decade, and Dominique decided to prove her love to Tiberius by gifting him her entire country (though she, of course, she remained de jure ruler). And so West Starblaydia was born.

Please direct further questions to enquiries@minfo.west.gov.sb.

SUPER: Did someone fix that %$#^ machine yet?

Wang: Actually, it just started working.

SUPER: Oh. Okay. Good. Because Sorthern Northland just came back too.

Wang: That's nice.

SUPER: Keep up the good work. *leaves*

Hwang: %$#^! This link doesn't work!

Wang: What link?

Hwang: This %$#^ link at the bottom of the West Starblaydia Ministry of Information website.

Wang: First of all, that's the virtual interface. You can't connect to the Internet on the virtual interface. Second of all, it's not a link. It's just the email address posted on the screen. Oddly, I'd figure because they should have made it a link. With as many people wondered what the %$#^ just happened in Krytenia - or what was Krytenia, especially in as bizzare a manner as it happened - they're basically asking for a lot of questions. Or maybe it is some sick joke... So why do you want to email them?

Hwang: I've heard rumors that the couple bought a "mixing ship" from us, and I want to verify it.

Wang: It's probably happened in one of these realities.

Hwang: But is it this one?

Wang: I don't know. Why don't you use the Internet interface?

Hwang: Okay. *types* %$#^

Wang: What is it now?

Hwang: There's a virus infecting all of the Starblaydian computers...

Wang: Shut the %$#^ off!

Hwang: Why?

Wang: VIRUS!!!! *machine goes berserk!* %$#^...

SUPER: WTF mates? We've got nuclear Winter headed for us! I thought I told you to stop all of the Casaran refugees!

Wang: The machine is infected with a porn bot.

SUPER: Wang! I told you to stop looking at those porn sites! Hwang! I told you to watch over him!

Wang: What the what? I don't look at porn sites - he does!

SUPER: Whatever. You're both here, and you look alike. I don't care which of you is which, the point is we're in trouble. Once Winter lands, we're in for hell.

Wang: Wait! I thought Winter was going to Vephrall!

Hwang: She was, but then Vephrall took a vacation. So the next place to go was Casari, but since they were already in Casari, they decided to go to Novapsolu, but they discovered that Novapsolu disappeared, so they set course for the Han Empire.

SUPER and Wang: YOU KNEW?

Hwang: I was watching the news! It was everywhere!

SUPER and Wang: *blink* You're the dumbest subordinate/colleague that I've ever knwon.

Hwang: Well, I'm the only one, am I not?

Wang: So how do we stop Winter if the machine is infected with a porn bot?

SUPER: We'll have to hope that the machine defaults to protecting the Han Empire by sending all of the bad stuff to the place of greatest torment.

Wang: Which is where?

*** Somewhere in Candelaria And Marquez ***

WINTER: Well, %$#^ that. I don't think we're in Kansas anymore...

This RP, like many of the preceding RPs, are an uncollaborated work, and as such probably won't make much sense. But since this pertains to an active character, I'll state right now that I don't know what Casari would think of this, and as far as I am aware, the REAL PM (former) Winter is still on course to somewhere else, even if the country is taking a vacation. Don't blame me if you get confused by all of this name change %$#^.

*** back in the Control Box ***

Wang: Well, that was a strange porn bot.

Hwang: It didn't have any porn, just beautiful pictures of Jeruselem footy players.

Wang: In some places, that is good enough for porn.

Hwang: But they were wearing clothes!

Wang: They were wearing slutty clothes.

Hwang: *pauses* SO? I like my porn in the nude.

Wang: I'd prefer live action to pictures.

Hwang: Well, the machine is back and running again.

Wang: Weird.

Hwang: Yeah. Weird. *stretches arm over Wang's shoulder, nudges close, and pecks Wang on the cheek*

Wang: %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^ %$#^! What the %$$#^%$#^%$#&^% is wrong with you?#@$!@?

Hwang: All of those slutty pictures made me a little horny.

Wang: %$#^...

Official Apology Over Name

The editor of the Microlight Times has formally apologised to the Newmanistan Rockets over the recent confusion over team names. "This was an extremely silly mistake on my part and I will put a Post-It note on my desk that the Newmanistan national team is actually the Rockets." said the editor. He must have gotten confused with the Ofedestan Jets, who as yet have not been formed. He added,
"Sorry Newmanistan"

OFS

PS: Post now edited.

(A group of players hanging out in Jeremy McAllister’s room)

McAllister: You guys see this game? It’s the new NSWC Game from NS Sports. And we’re in it!

Brooker: Finally!

McAllister: Yeah, all the nations that had teams attempt to qualify for World Cup 40 are in it, so it’s our first time, and it comes with the accurate up to date rosters, too. When we get back to Newmanistan, I’m going to do some commercials for NS Sports Newmanistan. Nice little endorsement deal I got for myself.

Brooker: So you got the game free?

McAllister: Yep! But it’s pretty fun, I’m enjoying it.

Drummond: Did they make us good in the game?

McAllister: We’re ok. Kind of mid-pack. About where it can be expected. But it says you can play this one mode and make any nation a World Cup dynasty, so that’s what I am trying to do now in my spare time.

Drummond: You were more fun while you were chasing chicks. But anyway, it says Capitalizt SLANI is winning 4-nil. You’re not off to a good start.

McAllister: That’s because I’m setting up the miracle comeback!

Brooker: Uh huh.

Secrist: That game looks like fun. Let’s play!

McAllister: Alright, let me just save this. Ok, I’ll let you be Newmanistan.

Secrist: Ok just don’t go picking SLANI or Valanora on me.

McAllister: I’ll click this random team selection. (Click) Aleos? Aww well.

Secrist: Haha, good luck with Aleos.

Brooker: Let’s go Shawn, let’s leave these guys alone.

Drummond: Good idea, I miss the old J-Mac. Come on, video games, now?

Brooker: Next thing you know, he’ll have a girlfriend.

Drummond: Wow.... girlfriend. I like my girls a little less clingy. By the way, Ofedestan apologized.

Brooker: Good. We’re cool with them again.

Valandil of Dorthonion sat in the stands, watching and waiting. He was expecting the true fighting spirit of the Marauders to take hold of the side and wash away the Cafundeu players. Yet, he expectactions never came to be, as the sides ended two a piece, with navy and black side not looking anything like the title contenders they were supposed to be. Valandil sighed and shook his head, and then he turned to his notebook and began to finalize his evaluation. Valandil was the lead scout for the Premiership side Raynor City, and they were convinced that the VSC was not putting forth the kind of effort needed for this team to be competitve. Fearing for the next generation of Footballers, Zeratul commishioned Valandil to come and make an evulation of the side and of their manager. Espicially their manager, as it was near laughable that a performance soo far from the success that comes with the Valanora name was allowed to go unpunished, with Roki retaining his position. There was even a rumor going around that the VSC was becoming lazy and a tad corrupt in thier power over the Commonwealth.

So here Valandil was, scouting out his nation's own national team because of fears, well-founded fears, but fears none the less. He had watched these first two matches for the Valanora side, and he was far from being impressed at all. It seemed very well that the players themselves had a lot of talent and potential, but there was no guidance to their actions. It was as if it was all being forced into place, like the square peg into an oval opening, something no one with expierence would be doing. He needed no longer to attend any of the upcoming matches, as he had come to the conclusion that the VSC needed to make a choice. Either they quit sending a representative to this competitive, or they fire Roki and hire a real manager and put forth some real effort into winning the tournament, not merely just being satisfied as a player.

As soon as his plane would be scheduled, he would be back on his way to Dorthonion, back to his loving wife Nátulcien, where he would make the fateful e-mail to Zeratul. He knew that his recommendation carried weight, as the VSC would dare not go against the eldest male of the ruling family of the ESF. It seemed soo strange that one person could hold such power both in the sporting world, and in the political, but then again he was part of the Raynor clan. They seemed to have their hands in all the cookie jars, though they always seemed to have the best interest of the nation in their hearts. It's amazing to believe that a family who started as dark elves would wind up being soo powerful, considered to be the model of the Elven familyhood. It didn't really matter to Valandil, as all he really needed was his wife, and of course, football.

(OOC: New iMac has arrived but is sans legal excel, bear with me on the tables, but if anyone does nicely-formatted Group standings for me for all the groups, there's a decent bonus in it for you)

MATCHDAY THREE SCORES

Group A
Starblaydia 0-2 Jeruselem
Lovisa 0-3 Candelaria And Marquez
Kenavt 1-3 The Macabees

Group B
Daehanjeiguk 3-2 Milchama
Gwaine 2-2 Pablicosta
Fmjphoenix 1-2 Taeshan

Group C
Bazalonia 2-4 Cafundeu
Fujisawan Territories 1-2 Newmanistan
Elves Security Forces 3-1 Ofedestan

Group D
West Starblaydia 2-1 Agroprom
United Heztel 0-2 Nethertopia
Yafor 2 2-2 Blouman Empire

[OOC: My attempt.]


Legend:
Nation Name Pts. P W D L GF GA GD

Group A
Jeruselem 9 3 3 0 0 8 1 7
Candelaria and Marquez 7 3 2 1 0 9 5 4
Starblaydia 6 3 2 0 1 4 3 1
Macabees, The 4 3 1 1 1 7 6 1
Kenavt 0 3 0 0 3 3 10 -7
Lovisa 0 3 0 0 3 0 7 -7

Group B
Daehanjeiguk 9 3 3 0 0 10 4 6
Taeshan 6 3 2 0 1 3 4 -1
Pablicosta 4 3 1 1 1 3 3 0
Gwaine 4 3 1 1 1 6 7 -1
Fmjphoenix 3 3 1 0 2 2 3 -1
Milchama 0 3 0 0 3 3 6 -3

Group C
Newmanistan 9 3 3 0 0 10 5 5
Cafundeu 5 3 1 2 0 8 6 2
Elves Security Forces 4 3 1 1 1 7 6 1
Fujisawan Territories 4 3 1 1 1 5 4 1
Ofedestan 3 3 1 0 2 4 8 -4
Bazalonia 0 3 0 0 3 2 7 -5

Group D
Blouman Empire 7 3 2 1 0 8 4 4
Nethertopia 6 3 2 0 1 5 3 2
West Starblaydia 6 3 2 0 1 4 5 -1
Yafor 2 4 3 1 1 1 3 3 0
Agroprom 3 3 1 0 2 3 4 -1
United Heztel 0 3 0 0 3 2 6 -4

Hwang: BOO! BOO!

Wang: What the %$#^ is your problem now?

Hwang: They just scored again!

Wang: Milchama is a good side. Losing to them isn't bad.

Hwang: Not when it's 2-0! I'm going to intervene!

Wang: NO!

Hwang: Yes! *presses button*

*** on the field ***

Milchama GK: *starts to sing "Largo al factotum"*

Coach Yu: What the %$#^ is that guy doing?

Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks: I don't know. Looks like he's singing.

Coach Yu: Why is he singing?

Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks: I don't know. Even if I knew what he was singing...

*Han player scores while Milchama GK is singing still*

Coach Yu: GOAL!

*** Back at Control Box ***

Hwang: GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO... *Wang presses button* ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOO...

Wang: *blocks Hwang's mouth* Okay! We've got it! Goal! Already! Shut it!

Hwang: *muffled speech*

Wang: Stop yelling! You're lucky that no one's noticed it.

SUPER: What the %$#^ is going on? The Office of Paranormal Activities just noted that the Milchama GK sang a stupid aria, yelling some "figaro" incantation. Did you press any buttons?

Wang: *still covering Hwang's mouth* No!

SUPER: *looks at them oddly* I'm getting you some fresh air. Just don't do anything stupid to make me regret it.

Wang: Yes, sir.

Hwang: *muffled speech*

Wang: Don't do anything stupid, Hwang. *uncovers* Let them play in peace.

Hwang: NEVER! *presses button*

*** Back on the field ***

Milchama Team: *start singing the "Major General's Song" with accompanying chorus*

Coach Yu: Didn't they just learn what happened the last time? And now they're all singing!

Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks: Maybe it gives them inspiration?

Coach Yu: Not while our strikers are at their goal! GOAL!
*embraces Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks* Oh, right. So have you decided on staying with the team?

Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks: Maybe. I like the atmosphere, and the kids are brilliant. Although maybe we should start getting the players to sing opera more often if it works.

Coach Yu: Thankfully, it doesn't seem so.

*** Back at Control Box:

Hwang: ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

Wang: *covers Hwang's mouth again* Dammit, I told you already! Stop yelling goal! And stop pressing the damn buttons!

SUPER: What the %$#^ is going on in here? I just heard yelling from across the Hall!

Wang: Nothing. We just scored, and Hwang was celebrating.

Hwang: *muffled speech*

SUPER: Right. Well, I've gotten more weird news from the Office...

Wang: The whole Milchama team was singing?

SUPER: Well... I don't know how you knew... oh, you were watching the game *laughs* well... no. It's Candelaria And Marqeuz again. They've apparently got a parade of robotic ducks prowling their streets.

Wang: We'll fix it...somehow.

SUPER: Don't! If you fix it, then they'll know something is wrong. We'll just have to note it... And none of you pressed any of the buttons?

Wang: Nope.

SUPER: Hmmm, maybe it's that porn bot still. We'll have to purge the system sometime. *leaves*

Hwang: *muffled speech*

Wang: Let's just watch the game in peace. If you start yelling, I'm going to knock you out cold. Understand?

Hwang: *nods*

Wang: *lets go and the two watch in peace* Want some popcorn?

Hwang: Sure.

Wang: *goes out to pop some popcorn* DON'T TOUCH ANY OF THE BUTTONS!

Hwang: Yeah, I know. *waits for Wang to come back* You know. I'm glad that you're here with me. You stand up for me, even though I'm such a punk. Thanks for looking out after me.

Wang: Well, if you didn't do all that stupid stuff, I wouldn't have to worry about anything else.

Hwang: Come on. *they hug - Hwang handcuff's Wang's hand to chair* HAHA!

Wang: What the %$#^?

Hwang: I played you like a sucker! Now! Redemption!

Wang: No!!!!

*** Back at field ***

Coach Yu: It's five minutes to end of time! We've got to score!

Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks: I think that's about to change...

Coach Yu: Seol Gihyeon! He's going up! He's going! Pass! Pass, pass pass! Pass dammit! He crosses to Shin Hyeiseong, heads it, HE...

*** ZAP ***

- Immediately, the entire stadium stands up, and in spite of the last strike goal, everyone rises controlled and start to sing "Gloria all'Egitto, ad Iside". At the end of the song, the referee blows his whistle for the end of the game -

Coach Yu: What was that?

Ex-convict He-who-whacks-sticks: Well... that's what opera can do.

Coach Yu: Hmm, maybe we should start hiring opera stars.

*** Back at Control Box ***

Wang: Uncuff me!!!

Hwang: ...OOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO...

SUPER: WHAT THE %$#^ IS GOING ON IN HERE?

*silence*

Wang: Sir, could you uncuff me?

SUPER: HOw did you get handcuffs in here? You know sex toys are not allowed!

Wang: What? Handcuffs?

SUPER: Anyway, I brought you guys some attention. They're girls from Seoan, so be kind. And it's costing the Agency 1000 for every night, so make it worth it! *leaves*

Wang: Oh, %$#^. Uncuff me Hwang!

Hwang: Why should I?

Wang: What happened to me looking out for you? What happened to me being your older brother? I thought you cared for me!

Prostitute1: Is he gay?

Wang: NO!

Hwang: Alright. I'll let you go. Besides, we won. Reason to celebrate! *uncuffs Wang*

Prostitute2: *whispers to Prostitute1* You can have the gay guy. I'll have the other guy.

Prostitute1: Cant' we share?

Hwang: OO! Foursome!

Prostitute2: *whispers still* On second thought, I'll take the gay guy.

Stunning Turn of Events in the Di Bradini Cup
Fedala International


http://www.ambersports.com/images/I/ab004l.jpg
[Plate A: One of our boys training hard for the upcoming game against Lovisa.]

STARBLAYDIA - In a more-or-less expected victory over Kenavt’s young national U-21 football team, the Macabee team has placed itself in a position where it may have hopes to reach the competition’s finals. Despite Starblaydia’s success in their past two matches, they have hit a snag in the past game against Jeruselem, causing them to stand in third place, with only a two point lead over the Golden Throne. Jeruselem, as expected, leads the competition with a clear advantage over most with a total of nine points – the maximum at this stage of the tournament – given their three straight victories. Candelaria and Marquez, the team which the ‘Imperials’ managed a draw with, is in second place with a one point lead over Starblaydia, and their position more or less reassured unless they stumble in the next two games. This is a possibility, given that their next match is against the insofar impregnable fortress that Jeruselem’s team have made themselves out to be. The two most unfortunate teams in the group, Kenavt and Lovisa, have not had a single moment of luck throughout this competition. Kenavt’s next game is against Starblaydia, which promises to be as brutal as their previous games. Lovisa must play the Empire, and although perhaps Lovisa’s chances for victory are highest against this team, this should be considered a ‘relative’ integer (chance, that is). All in all, it seems that the group’s standings will be even more polarized than they already are. It’s expected that Jeruselem will at twelve points, Starblaydia with nine, and Candelaria and Marquez and The Macabees ‘tied’ with seven (depending on the goal difference figures), while Lovisa and Kenavt will be at the other pole, with zero points a piece. If this is the case, it seems that the true fight will be for third place, and perhaps second – with Jeruselem almost guaranteed group leader.


Legend:
Nation Name Pts. P W D L GF GA GD

Group A
Jeruselem 9 3 3 0 0 8 1 7
Candelaria and Marquez 7 3 2 1 0 9 5 4
Starblaydia 6 3 2 0 1 4 3 1
Macabees, The 4 3 1 1 1 7 6 1
Kenavt 0 3 0 0 3 3 10 -7
Lovisa 0 3 0 0 3 0 7 -7

[Table 1: Current standings for Group A.]

The Imperials’ game against Kenavt started out similar to past games, with two strikers – Mika D’Angíel and Luí Gasapor – being ambitiously offensive, in an attempt to gain the majority of control over the ball. Fortunately, it seems that this game the defense played much better than usual, stopping balls before they reached the goal box and recovering in the middle of the field. These recovers and subsequent good passes and excellent set-ups for the strikers allowed for the game’s three goals by the Empire. Luí Gasapor managed the first goal, in the ninth minute, heading the ball into the net after a shockingly effective high pass by Val Torres. Although there were cries of off-sides, neither the referee or his assistants called the offense, and the game kicked-off one to zero [1 – 0]. The second goal, also in the first half, came by the foot of Henrý Talos, who placed the ball in the net after a set-piece straight-to-goal kick. The high arch, the angle of decent and the vector in which the ball was coming towards the goal make it implausible for Kenavt’s goal keeper to successfully block it, and the game was soon at two to zero [2 – 0]. In this way, the first-half finished with a clear Macabee advantage. On the other hand, the first-half – as usual – also saw poor passing between the midfielders and the forwards and poor cooperation, translating into a multitude of lost potential for more goals. Nevertheless, it should be indicated that the team has been training hard in an effort to correct these issues before they meat the dread Jeruselem on the field on the last match day.

The second-half’s relaxed attitude, at least on part of the Imperials, allowed an easy ball to slip by the sleeping defenders, which ended up kicked into the Imperials’ net in the sixty-third minute (’63), bringing the game up to two to one [2 – 1]. Fortunately, this goal woke the Macabee team up and an effective series of counter attacks, well played recovers in the mid field, and the tenacious attacks on part of the team’s two most reviled strikers brought the game to three to one after the usual goal by Mika D’Angíel, in the seventy-sixth minute (’76). The game ended in the ninety-second mine (’92) with three points to one [3 – 1], giving the Golden Throne its first victory in Starblaydia and its second straight match day without a loss. The win has allowed the Empire to take three points to give it a better chance in the final standings in the group, while it has finally reached a positive goal-difference – even if it’s only one! However, the second-half was offered an even greater insight into the weaknesses of the team, which will hopefully be ironed out over the practices before the Jeruselem game and during the next match against Lovisa. These issues include: underestimation of the opponent, relaxing when the team has a comfortable lead and lack of communication between the midfielders and the strikers when it most matters. However, all of these issues are ‘minor’ in the way that they can be worked on and quickly dealt with. The team performs better with each passing game, and nobody can deny this.

Most fans and the team are expecting a second victory in the game against Lovisa, and many hope that the team’s futsal victory in the first match day will be a foreshadowing of the Di Bradini Cup day. Unlike Kenavt, Lovisa has yet to score a goal in any match, always being shut-out by their opponents. In match day one, Lovisa lost to Jeruselem by two points to zero; the second match day was little better, with a shut-out by Starblaydia of two points, as well. This last game they did worse, loosing zero to three at the hands of Candelaria and Marquez, which made-up for its draw against The Macabees on the second match-day. For these reasons, Lovisa is now last in the group, even behind Kenavt – which manages to remain second-to-last due to the fact that they have managed to score three goals in the last three games. Most hope that Lovisa’s game against The Macabees will come out similar, or at least hope for an Imperial victory, since this would be absolutely necessary if the Empire has any chances to enter the competition’s finals. If Lovisa even manages to score a goal, the empire will be the only team to date to accept a goal from Lovisa. But, the most important part is to win, or else chances to reach the final will reach the limit to zero! Regardless, working on Lovisa’s lack of offensive strength and our striker’s ambitions, perhaps we shouldn’t worry as much as we are – although the team should continue to train as hard as it has been during the past days.

To this purpose, the team has been drilling quite hard the day after the game in preparation for both the matches against Lovisa and Jeruselem. There’s no doubt that they are working on better cooperation, through short scrimmages, better defensive abilities, more accurate shots by part of the strikers and there is no further doubt that they have been lectured on staying awake during the entire game. Interestingly, with the draw with Candelaria and Marquez and the win over Kenavt, most players are no longer complaining about the long training days, given that it seems to be paying off. With this win the morale of the team has skyrocketed, after they expected worse results in this year’s Di Bradini Cup. Indeed, nobody could have told anybody that the team would tie with Candelaria and Marquez and be believed. Determination, training, tenacity and skill have made it possible for the team to defend themselves against the best, putting in at least one goal per game insofar, and to win against those which should be technically on level ground with the Golden-White Imperials. Hopefully, these important characteristics will show themselves in the game against Lovisa, for the sake of the team’s capabilities of reaching the finals their first attempt at a U-21 tournament – it would be quite the feat, and the first time the team has reached the finals of any international football competition. Besides, this is the first time in a long while where we have been so utterly entranced by the performance of one of our sports team in an international tournament and we should take this time to thank our boys in Starblaydia for their excellent performance and for giving the entire country hope.


Legend:
Nation Name Pts. P W D L

Group A
Jeruselem 12 4 4 0 0
Starblaydia 9 4 3 0 1
Candelaria and Marquez 7 4 2 1 1
Macabees, The 7 4 2 1 1
Kenavt 0 4 0 0 4
Lovisa 0 4 0 0 4

[Table 2: Expected standings for Group A after Match Day #4.]

We’d like to take the time to give a reportage on the other groups, as well. For example, Group B is somewhat less polarized but a little bit more clear on who is expected to take the first three spots, although the spot for third is equally – or more so – contested than in Group A. Daehanjeiguk, in their usual style, have won their third consecutive game, this time against Milchama [3 – 2] – the former is still undisputed group leader. Second in the group is Taeshan, after their two to one [2 – 1] victory against Fmjphoenix’s team. Gwaine and Pablicosta are tied for third place, as their game resulted in a draw. Fedala International expects Daehanjeiguk to defeat Fmjphoenix in the next match, given the current track record of the latter, while also expecting Pablicosta to defeat Milchama. The Taeshan game with Gwaine is up in the air, given that both are very good teams and both have had their fair share of success in this year’s Di Bradini Cup. However, for the sake of declaring something, we expect a draw between these two teams in their game together. This would keep Daehanjeiguk as the undisputed group leader, while Pablicosta would take third place for its own, while Gwaine would remain in fourth.


Legend:
Nation Name Pts. P W D L

Group B
Daehanjeiguk 12 4 4 0 0
Taeshan 7 4 2 1 1
Pablicosta 7 4 2 1 1
Gwaine 5 4 1 2 1
Fmjphoenix 3 4 1 0 3
Milchama 0 4 0 0 3

[Table 3: Expected standings for Group B after Match Day #4.]

In Group C – this has a similar distribution of points to Group B – the most exciting game will probably be between Newmanistan and Canfundeu, the two group leaders. Even if Newmanistan loses it will remain group leader, although the gap between itself and Cafundeu will be dramatically shorter. On the other hand, Newmanistan’s victory could mean the loss of second place for Cafundeu – the latter has, without a doubt, more to lose. Both are excellent teams and therefore it’s difficult to tell which will win the match, but Newmanistan has gone unbeaten. Well, more accurately, they have won all three games, since Cafundeu has technically not lost a game either throughout the tournament (two draws and one victory). However, based on Newmanistan’s performance against the Fujisawan Territories in this previous match, we will bet for a victory by Cafundeu. In any case, we’re also betting on a victory over Bazalonia by Elves Security Forces, while the Ofedestani game should be just as interesting as the Newmanitani and Canfundei game, although we foresee a victory for Fujisawan Territories. This suggests that the fight for first place will be up to the final match day, as opposed to this next match day. In this sense, Group C remains one of the most versatile and more evenly distributed groups of the tournament – there is a chance that there will be no clearly defined group leader after the fourth match day, which is important for those that love football for what it’s known for; the fact that anything can happen and so you must watch until the end.


Legend:
Nation Name Pts. P W D L

Group C
Newmanistan 9 4 3 0 1
Cafundeu 8 4 2 2 0
Elves Security Forces 7 4 2 1 1
Fujisawan Territories 7 4 2 1 1
Ofedestan 3 4 1 0 3
Bazalonia 0 4 0 0 4

[Table 4: Expected results for Group C after Match Day #4.]

In Group D we are rooting four our Fedalan allies, Yafor 2, in their game against West Starblaydia. Despite a poor beginning, the Yaforite team has grown to force a draw and unsheathe a victory, which puts them fourth – right under their next foe, West Starblaydia. On the other hand, we expect the Blouman Empire to have a resounding victory against United Hetzel, which is the group’s last team. However, despite United Hetzel’s lack of success we must be fair and state that we believe the Blouman Empire to have the superior team in the group and that they will finish the first part of the tournament with all fifteen points under their belt and as group leaders (obviously). Finally, we assume that Nethertopia will have an easy victory against group second-to-last Agropom. In this sense, Group D is as polarized as Group A, with a clear group leader and a clear group end. The real dispute is in the middle, which makes it all the more heated – which is always good (although it does get boring to see the group leader ahead so early). In the end, we expect the group to pass on the Blouman Empire, Nethertopia and Yafor 2 – in that order – for the tournament’s finals.


Legend:
Nation Name Pts. P W D L

Group D
Blouman Empire 10 4 3 1 0
Nethertopia 9 4 3 0 1
Yafor 2 7 4 2 1 1
West Starblaydia 6 4 2 0 2
Agroprom 3 4 1 0 3
United Heztel 0 4 0 0 4

[Table 5: Expected results for Group D after Match Day #4.]

The authors of this article also feel compel to discuss the new political situation in Krytenia, or what is now known as West Starblaydia (as we have been calling it throughout the length of this article). It has been a subject touched on by several different news sources in the foreign world and we feel that our readers should be literate both on sports and politics. The heat of state of Starblaydia has recently married the heat of state of Krytenia, resulting in a quasi-union of the two countries. As a consequence, the nation of Krytenia has renamed itself in the nation of West Starblaydia. As far as we know, this change has been entirely peaceful and no violence has broken out between those who agree with the ideological change and those which disagree. On the other hand, there has not been much news on how the people of the two countries feel about the decision. Regardless, as far as the Di Bradini Cup is concerned, the issue has not had a major impact on the game play of ‘West Starblaydia’s’ team against their opponents. Whether this is good or bad may depend on the results of their game against Yafor! No, we’re just joking, but not really. The truth is that we hope the best for those nations as peace-loving citizens of a peace-loving empire (our wars of expansion don’t count). But, it wouldn’t be the first time a country known through its football in international competitions has gone into civil war – there have even been examples of nations to go into civil war because of football! But, this is enough politics for one day.

- Daví Merkat

GAZETA DO POVO - O JORNAL DA NAÇÃO CAFUNDELENSE
Sports Section - Articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

MORE IMPROVEMENT... SUPPORTERS EXPECT A BIT MORE

After two 2x2 draws, the supporters in Cafundéu were expecting to see the team winning the first game in this edition of the Di Bradini Cup. This time, the opponent was Bazalonia, fielding a team with completely unknown players (even more than the players of the other teams, who are already unknown for being young). So, the black-gold team was far from having the strength of the second-placed team of the last World Cup. And the Monopolists took advantage of this fact to defeat them easily, getting their first win in the competition, a win that was long awaited.

The result was built in the first two minutes of the game. After Bazalonia missed the first attack of the game, Cafundéu made an extremely fast counterattack which ended in a long ranged shot by Fabinho, who scored the first goal. One minute after, a defender lost the ball to Renildo, who ran to the left wing of the field and crossed the ball to Hubert, who headed and scored the second goal. Still in the first half, a player scored a goal for the Bazalopes. But, when Cafundéu returned to the second half, it was clear that the victory wouldn't escape. Using all his talent, Alves scored the third goal.

The Monopolists continued attacking, but missed too many chances, which showed that the team still needs improvement. Bazalonia's team seems to be one of the least strong of the entire competition, so a victory was necessary. The last goal scored by the red-black team came from the foot of Renildo, who invaded the area, dribbled a defender and shot with strength. Bazalonia could even score a goal during injury time, but that was all. Cafundéu won the game, and kept the hopes of qualifying for the next stage. Now, the opponent is Newmanistan.

CAFUNDÉU 4x2 BAZALONIA

Place: somewhere in Starblaydia.
Attendance: not released.
Referee: Visto Feito (Fmjphoenix).
MOTM: Renildo (Cafundéu)

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Montanha and Barba; Fabinho, Abreu (Januário 45') and Túlio (Jules 77'); Hubert, Alves and Lacerda (Rossi 63').
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/bazalonia.png BAZALONIA: no team released.

Goals:CAF: Fabinho 1' , Hubert 2' , Alves 65' , Fabinho 81'.
BAZ: a player 39' , another player 91'.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – formation for game against Newmanistan: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Japa and Barba; Fabinho, Rossi and Túlio; Hubert, Alves and Lacerda.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

Match’s Referee: Danny Korbel (Jeruselem).

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC goalscorers:

3- Alves
2- Hubert
1- Túlio, Renildo, Fabinho

THE ROCKET REPORT

TOUGH BATTLE IN REMATCH YIELDS THREE MORE POINTS

Starblaydia- The Rockets seem to have this bit of beating teams a second time when they look forward to a rematch covered. When Newmanistan defeated Kose and The Turkomans in the Baptism of Fire championship, the Turks got a second chance to show that they could beat the Rockets in the Cup of Harmony. But Newmanistan took care of business and defeated the Turks again, in what was probably the highlight of our Cup of Harmony effort. Now, the Empire was matched up with the Fujisawan Territories, giving the Territories a chance to show that they could beat Newmanistan’s junior club. Fujisawan did defeat Newmanistan’s senior side in a friendly back before World Cup qualifying. Again the Rockets were prepared for the revenge-thirsty opponent, and again, defeated them for three points.

Looking back at the previous two matchups, the Di Bradini final, and the friendly, both final scores ended up being 1-nil. Which given the general offensive focus of each club, is pretty interesting, and shows that when these two nations meet, you will be getting a great game. On a beautiful day in Starblaydia, the game began with both teams eager to mix it up pretty early. In the fourth minute, a hard collision between Jennifer Vilardi and Kita Yasuda led to some pushing and shoving between the two ladies, which ultimately got broken up, and the referee let them both off the hook without a card. Though the symbolic nature of the two having the get together was surely noticed by those clamoring for gender equality in sports. Because here not only were two ladies each representing their team at the level, but they were also shedding a bit of a stereotype that women who do play are generally softer and less aggressive then the male counterparts. The first half was truly a grind it out game, with about a tight 51-49 possession split, with the Rockets having the slight upper hand. Each team had four shots on target in the first half, and Corey Hennis and Leo Kajiwara got to all of them. This game was heading down the similar path as the previous two, with a scoreless draw at intermission.

Early in the second half, both teams turned up the offense. In the 49th minute, the Territories had a sure goal on a brilliant pass from Deanna Distefano to Kay Distefano-Honda. Obviously, they had done this before. Distefano’s shot grazed off Hennis’ fingertips and was heading inside the goal until Michael Harrison came out of no where to make a last-ditch dive to keep the ball from crossing the line. While Harrison clearly got to the ball in time, a couple Fujisawan players had their arms up in the air as if to begin celebrating. Jeremy Brooker followed up the Harrison play with a clear out of the danger area. Seven minutes later, the young Deanna Distefano decided she needed to do it herself this time, blasting a shot from about 15 yards that left Hennis absolutely hopeless. GOAL! Fujisawan Territories up 1-nil. Afterwards, it looked like it was going to hold up, and be yet another 1-nil result. Brian Carson substituted in Shannon Vilardi for Shawn Drummond in the 66th minute as Drummond appeared to sustain a particularly painful cramp. Shannon would made her presence felt, and in the 77th minute, she would assist on the equalizer, giving her twin sister a beautiful pass to work with, and Jennifer capitalized to draw the Rockets level. Neither team wanted a draw, and both teams pressed for three points. And in the 84th minute, it would be Newmanistan taking the lead on a shot by Dale Stevens that Kajiwara got to, but couldn’t hold. Jeremy McAllister got to the rebound first and roofed it to the back of the net. Fujisawan Territories did not let up, and in the 90th minute, Corey Hennis had to make a great save to secure the victory.

So the final score, ends up being 2-1, improving the Rockets to 3-0-0 in the Group, sitting alone in first place. Despite that mark, there is still plenty of work to do in this difficult group, and it will continue with their next game, which is against Cafundeu. Here is some post game reaction from coach Carson and select players.

Carson: “I like the way we played today. Whenever we get together with the Fujisawan Territories, it’s a great match and this was no exception. Though we well behind, we kept coming, and get a nice come from behind victory. As a coach, you love to win like this.”

Brooker: “I think you guys should be talking to Harry (Michael Harrison) instead of me. His play really saved us right there at the beginning of the second half.”

Harrison: “I just did what came naturally. Not something I really thought about, I just knew I might have a shot at getting to the ball after at bounced off Corey’s hand, so I did what any defender would do.”


Hennis: “It was a great game, and fun. I have a ton of respect for them, they work hard and are gritty. I’m glad I was on good form tonight, and that my defenders, especially Harry, bailed me out!”

J Vilardi (on the early shoving with Yasuda): “She got a little low, right under my knee and I really wasn’t too happy about it, because I didn’t really think it was necessary given the situation we were in. But we both got over it.”

J Vilardi (on her goal, assisted by her sister): “I am so glad we were able to do that at least once in this cup. Now, I just have to set her up.”

McAllister: (on the game winner): “Dale’s shot fooled the keeper a little bit, so I had a feeling there would be a rebound. It kinda played out the way I anticipated it would, so I was positioned well after Kajiwara couldn’t hold it. We beat a great team today, and have improved our chances of advancing from the group, but we still have more work to do.”

The Albrecht Herald Online>Sport>Black
Alan Black’s Sportsweek

After a thrilling seven days of international sport, the Herald’s Alan Black parades all the facts and figures for those of us with eyes fixed firmly on another contest entirely…

• The Big Blues got things underway seven days ago, with a 2-0 victory over Jariss that secured their qualification at the top of their Cup of Harmony group. After the kind of start C&M had enjoyed absolutely no-one saw that one coming, following the Matchday Two defeat to Rennidan that would ultimately see Lloyd Donnelly ‘encouraged’ to bring his tenure as the senior team’s head coach to an end. With Ozzy Stefano (no prior experience of formal coaching, never mind management) and Damien Sono (a couple of year’s experience as a minor member of Donnelly’s backroom staff) left as the leaders from the sidelines, even the heartiest C&M fan was expecting the Big Blues to be battling it out with their Kura-Pellandi rivals for the wooden spoon.

A couple of 2-0 victories later however, including a vital morale-booster against Kura-Pelland themselves, and C&M went into the Jariss game on a high following their successful little rebellion. After a tight and tricky first half, Nia Juilo conceded a penalty put away by Ignacio Vélez and Fred Ma added the second from O’Sullivan Caras’ cultured pull-back. Rennidan also made it through meanwhile, the über-defensive outfit eking out another 1-0 win, against Kelssek

• Over on the other side of the Bekk meanwhile, the Small Blues opened their Di Bradini Cup campaign with victory against the newcomers of kenavt and with Huntick fielding more-or-less the side widely predicted in the Candelariasian press, C&M had little trouble overcoming the group whipping boys. A surging Gary Mills run was stopped in its tracks just outside the penalty area, but the ball broke to Jamie González, who in turn fed Jason Federici. After a shot-shy season thus far for Port of Clotaire, the young striker made amends with a sidefooted effort.

After that seventh minute opener, Mills himself added a rapid second; González and Peter De’Ath exchanging passes down the centre while the Nethertopian-based winger evaded two challengers and waltzed into the box to collect De’Ath’s pass to score. C&M dominated the rest of the first half without adding to their lead, and the soft centre at the heart of this particular outfit was exposed early in the second period, with Agamemnon Knight and Caleb Christmas clearing off the line after the young Albrecht ‘keeper Stefan Santamaria had taken a powerful shot over the line.

Despite their passing cultural resemblance to Cafundéu however, the kenavti looked a pretty poor outfit and were finally undone late on, after a sustained spell of pressure led to naught, by a long Arthur Wangen punt upfield poked in by substitute Kian Donnelly. The rest of the group went to expected form, Starblaydia and Jeruselem claiming victories over the Macabees and Lovisa, while reigning champions Newmanistan continued their unnerving march towards a take title with victory over the Eesseff. Bloumany were the biggest winners, with a 3-0 win over Krytenia in what may prove the Atlantian Oceanian state’s final sporting international under that identity.

• While the Small Blues set themselves up as first-half bully-boys, their senior cousins were carving out a reputation as second-period specialists under Stefano and Sono, following another 3-1 victory, this time in a first meeting with KaMaRi. In the unexplained absence of O’Sullivan Caras, Albrecht’s Ben Edwards had a masterful performance. A looping cross on fifty-four set up Ramiro Novo to knock in a simple finish, before Tracker’s little boy was granted a free-kick on the area from which he scored with a shot driving under the wall and leaving Alik Hana utterly wrong-sighted.

Piling forward in search of a third, the Big Blues were caught out in an unerringly similar way and gave up a goal to Ken Hetinx’s breakaway effort. Never the most offensive of sides, the KaMaRians never the less gave Oberon Martinez much to do before, once again, a substitute dug C&M out of trouble; the rather more familiar face of José Felipe Cassumba Domingos popping up on the edge of the area and scoring off the post. Suddenly, the Harmony seemed all set up for C&M; but the Rennidainian victory on penalties over the Nires sent a few nerves across Hoxton. Both of ‘em.

• Over in Septentrionia meanwhile, the Blue Hard Vulcanised Rubber Discs continued a sparkling few hours of Candelariasian international sport with a 3-0 win over Pablicosta, through captain Xavier Deadman and Chris Gerard (2). We don’t know anyone who watched it, but it was the biggest win of the first round of games. I think.

• The Small Blues returned to action, in a game that was always going to serve merely as an hors d’oeuvre for the main course later that evening in the senior tournament. As appetisers go however this was a tasty morsel indeed, a match that exposed the defensive frailties (or gaping holes, if you prefer) in both the Candelariasian and Golden Throne outfits. Despite their country’s venerability in international sport, the inexperienced young Macabees side started as the underdogs but were a goal to the good inside ten minutes; Luí Gasapor converting from a cutback from the only national leaguer on the side, Inest Teng.

If Teng’s top-flight experience over his team-mate’s showed, the Macabees at least proved that the talent available at their disposal runs extremely deep. The star of the show, after all, was the amateur forward Mika D’Angíel; the powerful striker going on to score twice and narrowly miss a number of other, largely self-made, chances. He was certainly a cut above anything C&M had on show up front, though Federici would again make the first incision when, after snatching at the opportunity for an early volley, he was laid in by De’Ath and, still with plenty to do, evaded Javeir Lok’s challenge and rounded the ‘keeper Daví Res to score another rather lovely goal for the end-of-career DVD.

That had come on the thirty-seventh minute, but no sooner than three later were the Macabees back in front from D’Angíel, who produced a run that left Christmas puffing and blowing somewhere near the centre circle and a shot that gave Santamaria no chance whatsoever. It’s a pity that Albrecht Turkish’s lack of representation among the C&M twenty-three means that their scouting team is unlikely to be paying too much attention to the Di Bradini Cup this year, for with Samuel Taha a dozen games away from ending his career back home in Bettia, the young Macabee forward would be the ideal replacement and partner for Gary Maini – as doubtful as it is that even Turkish would be able to afford one of the outstanding young prospects of the world game.

This Small Blues at least has one effervescent talent of its own in the form of Jamie González, who is surely set to be the next Latino talent on the senior side from the current Marquez conveyor belt. A menace from distances long and short, the Arrigo Portuguese man cemented an astonishing ten minutes of football on forty-three with an ambitious, swerving effort with his left foot, which sailed past Res into the top right-hand corner.

The back and forth continued in the second half, but the group favourites and two-times champions, don’tchaknow, finally got their noses in front on sixty-five. Guillermo Ibarra, receiving his first minutes in the blue and green after the ineffective Casper Richardson had been withdrawn, received a González pass on the edge of the area and the chunky little playmaking forward scored a rare goal with Res just unable to get his fingertips to the ball. At this rate, the next senior C&M manager is really going to be scratching around for native-born English-speakers…

D’Angíel, of course, had the last laugh; appearing in just the right place to take down Henrý Talos’ sweeping ball wide on the right, cut past Grey Mendoza and finish with aplomb. Whatever one of them is.

• The main event in Bletcham however was one to forget, for Stefano and Sono’s luck finally ran out against Rennidan. The opposition were hardly the most ambitious side once again, though for the neutral the semi-final was a much better game than the group stage clash. Sadly not for the Candelariasians however; for although the Big Blues created plenty of openings, the absence due to injury of Ignacio Vélez left them clearly understaffed up front. Ryan Malkoa was equal to anything Novo or Joe Cunningham could through at him, while Fred Ma was corralled expertly in midfield, and C&M’s frustration began to build. Late on, Matteo Corradini produced a truly woeful challenge on Robert Golos for which he was retroactively banned. The incident gave Rennidan the necessary final push, and in the ninety-second minute Michael Ronnen held off Steven Williams to give the massive tournament underdogs a victory that will be celebrated in the Isle of Rennida for many years to come. And forgotten as quickly as possible in the Candelarias.

• It wasn’t just the C&M footballers and their supporters left distressed by this defeat. The national ice hockey team likewise had to deal with the news that even the radio coverage of their game in Septentrionia had been cancelled amid the passing melancholy that surrounds the Candelarias after defeat and the general consensus that they were going to, in the nicest possible way, have their arses handed to them by Plutoni, one of the giants of the game. Yet somehow it didn’t actually happen, and someone called Xavier Deadman set C&M on the way to a 3-0 win. That’s probably quite good.

• Meanwhile, fans of Albrecht Turkish and Green Island had reason to celebrate. Both can now claim genuine World Cup winners on their books, something previously reserved only for Albrecht FC with Naoki Tonnelier, after the Eesseff finally came good after several years of late disappointment with a 4-2 win over Bazalonia in the final; the GIZ’s Roger Zetaback setting up the “it is now” goal. In the aftermath of the Harmony exit however, the loosing finalist must also give C&M some hope for the future. Bazalonia, lest we forget, were ranked twenty-third in the world after qualifying – one place below a certain team in blue and green. Though the gap between us will clearly be rather larger when the next set of KPBs are announced, and not in a pleasing direction either, at least we can rest safe in the knowledge that even third-pot sides like ourselves have a chance at the highest level.

Provided we never play Dance 2 Revolution or Rennidan again, of course.

• But perhaps the Big Blues’ biggest worry is with pressure. In the aftermath of the semi-final defeat the CAMAFA confirmed Damien Sono’s departure, the former right-back opting to take up the post of Director of Sporting Development on the tiny pacific nation of la Isla del Hombre Olvidado. Ozzy Stefano took sole control of the team in that most meaningless of fixtures, the third-place play-off.

And promptly led them to a 6-1 win, a scoreline sort-of-equalising previous 5-0 results against the East Antairees and Nethertopia. Against a side as solid as Jeru FC this was an extremely impressive result and just showed what C&M can do when winning doesn’t actually matter. Given that the Nethertopian performance was in a friendly as well, you have to wonder if the Big Blues are actually better than we – and they – think they are, which is a pretty unnerving thought. Anyroad, they were helped by some pretty suicidal defending from the Tsva HaHagana LeJeruselem, or whatever they are, we’ve never been entirely sure; and Fred Ma opened the scoring on the break in the twenty-sixth minute from Alessio Montano’s perfectly laid-in ball.

It had been pretty even up to that point, but Stefano’s group doubled their advantage through José Luis Sosa, the left-back who can always be counted upon for the odd goal, and from then on it was a performance of utter domination and supreme finishing skill – particularly from Joe Cunningham whose lopsided record of four Big Blues starts and fifteen substitute appearances now includes nine goals, thanks to a hat-trick notched up on 31, 57 and 86. Ben Edwards added the sixth moments before time with another curling free-kick.

• Truth be told, the Big Blues had more things on their mind than mere football; which does serve to make that result all the more impressive. Only after that game was the news released to the general Candelariasian public that O’Sullivan Caras, capped eighty-four times for his country over a period stretching back to the Baptism of Fire, lost his right arm in a dressing room accident earlier in the tournament. Whether Sully can fight his way back into international recognition once more, never mind actually play professional football again, remains unclear. Clube Imperial have yet to comment as to whether they indeed to sever his contract, if you pardon the expression, but the legend of one of C&M true greats seems to have reached a very sudden end.

Among those Candelariasians with tickets to the final there was little appetite left to cheer on Rennidan… and the upstarts were confidently dealt with by Acapais.

• Still, it’s an ill wind that blows no good; and the young Candelariasian footballers in Starblaydia who grew up with Caras on their screens had something to prove against Lovisa. In truth the 3-0 scoreline flattered C&M against an poor Lovisan outfit (though when aren’t they such at this level?) and with Jeruselem’s victory over Starblaydia the top four in this group look set to go down to the wire. Huntick opted to switch things around for the third game of a tiring competition, and Ryan Edwards rewarded the manager with a just beautiful solo goal on the half hour, dribbling from the half-way line and, with Guillermo Ibarra perfectly positioned, opting to go for goal himself with a pin-point finish.

But Will Poole was certainly more active in goal that Huntick would have wished and C&M failed to wrap the game up until late on when a pittery-pattery team move ended with Lloyd Carpenter scoring via a massive deflection on eighty-six. Niv Cohen beat the offside trap and smashed in the third in injury time.

With the Jeruselemites looking like genuine DBC challengers for the first time in a good while, Huntick has opted for a 4-5-1 for the game. Poole will keep his place between the sticks, behind a back four of Wangen, Knight, Christmas and Adekunde, with Carpenter and Tom Ely both seeing action in the centre of the park with Cohen and Aaron Kortsarian on the flanks. Ryan Edwards somehow keeps his place ahead of Jamie González, and big Casper Richardson will be stomping about up front. Only time will tell if Huntick’s naturally defensive outlook has resulted in a horribly negative XI.

• Elsewhere, we lost the hockey. Who are Gwaine again?


So come on. Historical and generation-defining elections? Meh, who needs ‘em? We’ve got international sport to worry about.

THE ROCKET REPORT

BROOKER’S BIG GAME

Starblaydia- Anyone can look at the Group C table, and without knowing anything else about the teams, realize that the match between Newmanistan and Cafundeu is an important one. They can look and see that Cafundeu’s leading scorer thus far is Denis Conte Alves, and then note that Jeremy Brooker is Newmanistan’s chief defender that will likely be assigned to Alves. But oh, there’s so much more right there. Brooker and Alves know each other pretty well, and it’s not because of game tape. They are teammates. Teammates at Dunboor FC in Cafundeu, the club in which Brooker recently transferred too. It’s an important game, but there’s no one out there, from either side, that this game will mean more too, at the individual level, then Jeremy Brooker. Our Clint Peterson sat down with Brooker to talk about the match that the defender has eagerly awaited.

CP: I’m joined by Newmanistan defender Jeremy Brooker. Jeremy, thanks for coming.

JB: It’s my pleasure.

CP: When your transfer to Dunboor FC was announced, many looked at it as the wake up call to Newmanistan’s domestic league that it to needed to be active in the market in order to keep up. How’s it feel to kind of be the one that prompted all that?

JB: Well, it wasn’t my intention, and I wasn’t the first person to go overseas either. You had the guys that went to Nethertopia leave before I did.

CP: True, but you were the big name, the biggest catch, and playing in one of the world’s most respected leagues.

JB: It’s a great thing for Newmanistan that its players have opportunities now like I have to go play in the bigger name leagues, because in time, it will also send more international players to Newmanistan. You saw that with Southport landing Sakura Jo.

CP: Off the field, how much of an adjustment have you had to make to everyday life in Cafundeu?

JB: There are similarities and there are differences, as you would expect. My everyday lifestyle hasn’t really changed, it’s still all about training, practicing football, playing football, practicing again, then watching football when I need to relax. Football is the number one sport here unlike Newmanistan where its probably like number three.

CP: What’s the main difference that you have noticed between domestic football in Cafundeu and in Newmanistan?

JB: Actually, there aren’t a lot of differences. Since the NSL, the NPL, I guess it is now is a league with more of an offensive focus, as a defender, I was always prepared for that. Things come at you quick here, but because I was accustomed to that in Newmanistan, and especially in South Charlotte where we were always defending an attack. I’ve adapted well, and I feel comfortable where I am.

CP: How strange is this going to be now, playing against their national team?

JB: Not that strange. I’m a proud Newmanistanian, and I will do what it takes for Newmanistan to win this football game. When their coming at me, it’ll just be like I am defending one of their club teams, and I am working with people in the back like Tony (Borsinger) and Steve (Secrist) that I have worked alongside before, and we feel comfortable working as a defensive unit.

CP: Have you been used as a scout, seeing how you know these players pretty well, and also may recognize some of their signals?

JB: Yeah, coach has asked me a bunch of questions, but I really have a limited knowledge of these guys even though you might think I am an expert. I haven’t been there that long, and not all of their players are from the A Division, so I’ll be seeing probably about half of them for the first time myself. As far as signals, again, I haven’t been there long enough. Anything I can relay to my teammates I will, but it’s not as if I am an expert on them.

CP: Their leading scorer, Alves, is a teammate of yours at Dunboor FC, and you will likely be assigned to him, what’s that going to be like?

JB: Once the game starts, it’s not going to matter. We both want three points for our team, and that will be our focus.

CP: Have you talked to him about it?

JB: Definitely, we’ve been in very close contact, but we’ve kinda shied away from talking about this particular match. Once its over with, we’ll probably want to talk about it more.

CP: Has there been any friendly wagering between you two?

JB: Yeah, but nothing big. Just that the loser will have to carry the others bags for the first two months of the season.

CP: Well good luck, Jeremy, it’s good to see you in blue and white again.

JB: Thank you, and all our fans should rest assured that I am completely committed to winning this game for Newmanistan.

Coach:
Great effort team. It's not everyday, one beats the Purple Menace but I just found out our Futsal team beat them in The Macabees as well. Well done but it's not over folks. We must keep on playing hard and winning kids.

Sadie: What's with these rumours we're replacing the current Jeru FC team.
Coach: No one's told me, but for this cup we're Jeruselem not Jeru FC.
Sadie: Yes coach

Coach:
We still have some more games to play. Not time to slack team, you maybe kids but we are army team. Victory is not automatic, we have to work to overcome the enemy. Well, it does not matter who the enemy is ... Starblaydia or C&M. We must march to victory, and work hard.

Sadie: When do we get some time for shopping?
Coach: Err, later. Not now ... we must train hard to make sure we have the form to win the finals.
Sadie: How's one to supposed to spend our money?
Coach: Most of team don't have money, you're lucky you have rich relatives. The army is about hard work and discipline not fun and frivolity.

Sadie: So we're really just a Jeru FC then? Jeruselem girls love to have fun!
Coach: Well, OK ... we aren't a real Jeruselem. We're just a wannabe Jeru FC here without the womanizing of course. Any more questions?

<Quiet>

Coach:
Come on kids, we want some thinkers here. I guess we got a squad of sheep here except maybe for Sadie. OK, everyone is up early tomorrow for some training. We have keep on working kids. One cannot rest in war and this is still a kind of war. We must work more, no rest unless we are defeated or victorous!

Shin: Everything appears to be normal.

Shim: That's good. Oh, and it looks like our two babies are starting to wake up.

Wang: Ng... What's going on?

Shim: Last night, you and I had a ball and now you're stuck handcuffed on a bed to your best friend.

Wang: Him? He's not my... WHAT?!?

Hwang: *wakes* Hey, stop yelling! Hey! We're handcuffed together. That's new.

Wang: What's happened?

Shin: Oh come on. Did you really think that we were your sex partners? We're your replacements.

Wang: But last night...

Shim: We gave you what you wanted so we could take over the controls without fighting.

Wang: We would have given the controls to you. Well, me at least. And could I at least have some trousers?

Hwang: What, you don't like my underpants?

Shin: Wait, you'd willing give up this position to us?

Shim: Without a fight?

Wang: Yes! And trousers please!

Shin and Shim: *whisper among themselves* Hmmm... *continue to whisper* Ah hah! *whisper and then finally toss the keys to Wang* Okay. You can go.

Wang: I wanted trousers, not the keys!

Hwang: I want the keys! *grabs keys and uncuffs himself before cuffing Wang to the bed.*

Wang: Hey!

Hwang: Your loss, my gain.

Shin: Hwang! That was rude. Give Wang the keys!

Hwang: No! I like him like that. He's cute.

Shim: I told you they were gay!

Shin: Gay people don't act like this. They're just babies. Wang's a little more mature.

Wang: Babies? Who said that?

SUPER: I did. And Wang, get some trousers on. How's the situation holding, ladies?

Shin: Superbly.

Shim: Excellent.

SUPER: I say that, don't use that word! Say... something else. Like... something else.

Shim: Something else doesn't sound so super.

SUPER: Yeah! That! Say 'super'! That's good. Excellent. Now. Wang and Hwang. Get in my office.

Wang: I wish I could.

SUPER: Get some trousers then, you idiot!

Wang: I'm cuffed to the bed?

SUPER: Yeah? Well... bring the bed with you. I always did like working in bed.

Shim: They're all dysfunctional.

Shin: Men... *sighs*

Shim: Alert! Alert! There's a problem in Sector 5436-dash-6547. Candelaria And Marquez!

Wang: What the %$#^ is wrong now?

Shim and Shin: Now?

Wang: Yeah. Everytime, there's a problem, and it's something dealing with Candelaria And Marquez.

Shin: Did anyone adjust the anti-material focus? I mean, it's possible that someone adjusted it to focus all of the bad stuff on Candelaria And Marquez.

Wang: Hmm... I've never thought of that.

SUPER: Just get in my office, Wang. Shin and Shim - fix it. I'm tired of Imperial Inquiries about Paranormal Activities.

Shim: Hmm... how should we fix this?

Shin: We could target the anti-material focus upon one of our enemies...

Shim: But who are our enemies?

Shin: And how do you re-adjust the focus? It can't be done on a whim.

Shim: Who would answer us?

Shin: Who would help us?

Hwang: *butts in between the two girls* Who keeps asking the questions?

Shin and Shim: *gaze menacingly at Hwang*

Hwang: You girls look cute. Mind for another night on the bed?

Shin and Shim: *kick him in the face and groin at the same time* HYAH!

SUPER: Oy, that's going to hurt him. Wang, forget about that meeting. We'll meet later.

Wang: What the %$#^?

Shim: He looks cute when he curses.

Shin: Why couldn't have him? He so much cuter than Hwang.

Shim: Because I'm smarter.

Shin: But I'm wiser.

Shim: Shut up slut, and fix this problem then!

Wang: Ladies, can I at least have some trousers?

Shin: Why don't you wear the bed sheets?

Shim: Because he can't. Dumbass. That's why I'm smarter.

Shin: But he really cared about his nudity, why not cover?

Shim: Because he likes his own clothing.

Shin: But we don't have any trousers because we all dumped them in the laundry basket...

Wang: Ladies!!! Ladies!!! I just want some pants! Is that too much to ask? And what the %$#^ do you mean you sent my pants to the laundry? We don't have a laundry service here!

Shim: You do now. Oh, he's so cute with his boxers. So... manly. *drools*

Shin: As opposed to mister ugly whitey-tighty... Why can't I have Wang?

Shim: Because he's mine, Shin.

Wang: LADIES!!! *everyone pays attention to him now* Okay... So there's a problem in Candelaria And Marquez now, and I'm still cuffed to the bed, and I'm still without my %$#^ING PANTS!!! Will anyone listen to me?

Shim: *pries keys from Hwang's hands* Here you go! *hands keys to Wang*

Wang: But I want pants.

Shin: Like I said, they're in the laundry. If you want pants, we can get you pants...

*** Later ***

Shim: Oh, so adorable.

Wang: Ladies. Thanks for the dress. Thanks for the make-up. Thanks for the manicure. Now GET ME OUT OF HERE!

Hwang: *gets up* Oh man, I feel... awful.

Shin: We could just get rid of him and share Wang to ourselves.

Hwang: Oh! A foursome! I love a good one! Let's have one now!

Shim: *everyone looks weirdly at Hwang* Dude, we just kicked your nuts and you want to have sex? What the %$#^ is wrong with you?

Wang: That's what I say!

Hwang: Wang? Is that you? Since when were you a girl?

Wang: I'm not a girl...

Hwang: Transvestite!

Wang: I'm not... oh whatever. As long as it gets me out of here.

Shim: We'll give you the keys only if you let us help with your hair.

Wang: Okay, forget it. I'll just sit here for the rest of the day. Nevermind that Candelaria And Marquez is going through a crisis of proportions with which I am not aware because I'm not looking at the screen, but I'll just sit here on this bed and wait for a good time to get the keys from you. And then when I get the keys, I'm going to cuff all of you together and then I'll play sick masochistic evil genius on all three of you.

Hwang: Dude, how do you do that? There's only room for two on a hand cuff.

Wang: Hmmm... true.

SUPER: Wang! Wang! Where is Wang?

Wang: Here?

SUPER: You're not Wang. Wang is a man.

Wang: *sighs* This is Wang. I'm just...

SUPER: *shakes head* You need to get a new life.

Wang: For once today, I agree with you.

WESTERN HERALD
Read across The Starblaydias.

Sons Rising In The East

WEST Starblaydia's first foray into international football since their "rebranding" has seen good, if somewhat mixed, results here in th Di Bradini Cup.

To be honest, it was a forgettable debut for the Westerners, losing 3-0 in a one-sided encounter against Bloumany; however things began to look up with a narrow two-one victory over United Hetzel. The third match was against Argroprom, and once again, the Westerners triumphed two-one.

The stage is set, then, for a thrilling climax to the group. West Starblaydia lie third in their group, behind the Nethertopians only on goal difference, and two points clear of the Yaforites, who they play next.

- - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - - -

Meanwhile, somewhere in Avidia...

Felix: Are we all here?

Zak: Zak Myers of the Adanac Chapter, sir.

James: Aigburth Chapter here. James Kelleher.

Diego: Emberton Avides Chapter, señor. Diego Vasquez.

Felix: Excellent. I have heard you three have done especially well with our recruitment. Our next objective is simple; make ourselves known, and get the international community behind our "political plight".

James: But what about keeping our cards close to our chest?

Felix: We need money. For money, we need foreign support - and for that we need foreign sympathy. Let's do something non-violent, you can manage that, yes?

All: Yes, sir!

Felix: Good.

THE EMPIRE TIMES

EAGLES MANAGE DRAW
Empire Now only a Point Ahead

The Eagles managed to muster up a goal in the dying minutes of their games against Yarfor 2 after a poor performance on the field. The game started poorly for the Eagles with Yarfor 2 striker Jamie Durand scoring in the 5th minute after a poor pass by Rt. Hon. Milken placed the ball at Durands feet who scored from just inside the 18 yard box. The poor performance by the midfield and defence continued throughout the second half with Yarfor 2 able to continue their relentless attack on Burner having 22 shots on goal in the first half and with Yarfor 2 having possession for 65% in the first half.

At the beginning of the second half it seemed as if the Yarfor 2 would continue their domination of the game with Danilo Silva scoring from 22 yards out into the top right hand corner in the 47th minute. Manager Copper made two changes five minutes later replacing Christopher Moreton with the Rt. Hon. Johnathon Milken and Adam Jones with Johnathon Cooper. This seemed to reenergize the team with the defence now effectively closing down any attacks by the Yarfor strikers before they could start. This also allowed the Eagles to have their first strike at goal for the game. In the 60th minute Christopher Speed managed to score 8 yards out after a shot by Aesop rebounded of the woodwork. For the rest of the game the battle was very much in the midfield with teams swapping possession constantly. A corner kick awarded to Bloumany in the 92nd minute gave them the final kick of the game with James Sleep heading the ball from an excellent kick by Ross Millsop. This ended the game with a 2-2 all draw between the two sides.

Manager Jack Copper has expressed that he was unhappy with the teams performance to day and must be something that they will be working on before the next match, he was also quoted as saying "We cannot repeat this sort of performance it is disgraceful and if we play like this again espeicially against some of the better teams then we will lose this competition and rightly so, I expect every player to play at the top of their game every time we do". Captain Alex Burner also said that the team must play smarter football if they want to continue playing in this cup.

The draw keeps the Empire on top of the table only a point ahead of both Nethertopia and West Starblaydia, after both teams managed wins against both United Hetzel and Agroprom respectively. The team next plays United Hertzel who has yet to manage a win and Manager Copper has said that "we won't be the first to lose to them".

(Rockets players gather in the hotel meeting room, once again)

Drummond: J-Mac, please tell me you’ve at least calmed down with the playing of that video game?

McAllister: Yeah, you know, it gets old after a while. Will probably play a little more when I get back home to Putnam Lake but for now, it’s all about football. So, what have you been up to?

Drummond: He shoots, he scores!

McAllister: (laughs) Why did I bother to ask. There’s so much other stuff to do around here though, they start to look the same after a while.

Drummond: Oh no, not when you get one that you’ve wanted to get for a while. Hey Jenn, what’s up?

J Vilardi: Umm, hi Shawn! (Blushes)

Drummond: See how her face turned all red? Why do you think that was?

McAllister: Wow.

Drummond: Both of them. See, this is why you gotta get back in the swing of things, dude. You haven’t found a true girlfriend yet, so why not have a little fun while you’re here. Oh that’s right, you were playing video games. Fun life, that committing thing and being all serious when it comes to women.

McAllister: (sighs) I guess I.... wait, no! You’re not gonna win! I will not give in!

Drummond: Suit yourself. Yo Brooks, whats up dude?

Brooker: Hey!

Drummond: Remember our bet? The Vilardi bet?

Brooker: Oh yeah.

Drummond: Photographic proof (shows pic). Pay up. (Brooker stares at pic then sighs and reaches into wallet)

J Vilardi: A bet? Proof? What?

Brooker: Uh oh.

Drummond: It’s nothing.

J Vilardi: Let me see that!

McAllister: It’s ok Jenn, it’s just a picture from the last Di Bradini Cup when he and some girl from Krytenia got tangled up that he will never stop talking about. You don’t want to see it, it’ll make you think less of Shawn.

J Vilardi: Uh, let me see anyway.

(Drummond is saved by the timely entrance of coach Carson into the room)

Carson: Hello team, settle down know we got a lot of stuff to go over about Cafundeu today.

(Drummond quickly hides picture, Jenn shakes head)

Drummond (whispering J-Mac): Thanks for stalling.

McAllister: No problem.

Drummond: Did you peak at the picture?

McAllister: I’m still a man, Shawn. Very nice.

*everyone is dressed up and proper today*

Shim: Is everything normal today?

Shin: It seems so.

Hwang: Let's play ball!

Shin: Yep. Everything is normal.

Wang: No... I still can't believe you guys posted all of that stuff on Youtube.

Shim: Oh, come on. You can't pass up an opportunity like that! Besides, you've gotten a lot of girl's on your website.

Wang: I have a website? Website?

Hwang: I made it for you! It had a photo gallery of all of those lovely moments of us together. Shim and Shin just added their own pics of you and me. Oh look, there's us...

Wang: WHAT THE %$#^?!? You guys! We can't have this like that! If people figure out that we exist, we're all doomed!

SUPER: What's this about a pornography club running amuck here? I just came from the Imperial Office of Efficiency with pictures of Wang in suggestive poses. What's going on here?

Shim: Nothing.

SUPER: Wang? Did you used to be a model before you signed up for this place?

Wang: No...

SUPER: Well, you should have been. Your body's too hot to stay in this place.

Wang: What?

Hwang: I told you!

Shin: %$#^, and I'm still stuck with the ugly guy.

Wang: He's not ugly, just stupid.

Hwang: He's right, you know.

Shim: This world is getting confusing. So we're under Imperial investigation about submitting sexually stunning pictures on the Internet? And you're not going to punish us?

SUPER: Why should I? You're not doing it, right?

*all quiet*

Hwang: Right.

SUPER: Good. Keep up the good work. Oh, and Wang. Some of the workers want you to pose for their calendar issue. I'd suggest you take it. *leaves*

Wang: %$#^...

Shim: Oh, don't worry Wang. You'll be perfectly fine in a few days. As long as there's no nuclear explosion, no one's going to care.

Wang: Wait! That's it! We need a distraction! Hwang!

Hwang: Yeah?

Wang: I want you to *whispers* press a button.

Hwang: *yells* Press a button?

Shin and Shim: *yells* Press a button?

SUPER: *runs back* Who did? Where? Why? When? How?!?

Wang: No one's pressed any button. Yet. Somehow.

SUPER: Oh. Okay. *leaves*

Hwang: Why do you want me to press a button?

Wang: If something is happening, people won't notice me. At least, people shouldn't want to notice me. Pressing the button changes the world for the better sometimes, so let's do that.

Shim: We can't let you do that ethically.

Hwang: But you'd do it for treats, right?

Shin: I'll take care of this. *holds up a bag of popcorn* Hwang-ee! Here's your popcorn!

Wang: No!

Hwang: Yes! *runs to grab popcorn, trips and falls on control panel*

Shim: Shin!

Shin: Oops.

Wang: *elated* What's happened?

*** Somewhere over Jeruselem ***

Person1: We've got to get these sexually suggestive pictures of some guy to some country before it gets too late...

Person2: Oh no! Turbulence!

*** Back at Control Box ***

Shim: Looks like pictures of you has been airdropped all over Jeruselem.

Wang: %$#^... I'll never hear the end of this.

Hwang: Wait, I thought bad things were supposed to happen to Candelaria And Marquez.

Shim: Well, we've haven't fixed that yet...

*** Over Candelaria And Marquez ***

Person1: We've got the latest issue of Bostopian models from Sorthern Northland's pornography vaults to some country before it's too late...

Person2: Oh no! Turbulence!

*** Back at Control Box ***

Shin: We've just killed all of the youth of Candelaria And Marquez.

Wang: Oh. My. %$#^.

Hwang: That doesn't seem to be the end of it...

*** Over West Starblaydia ***

Person1: We've got to get these rare Purple peanut-eating possums to the Purple Potty Portal before it's gets too late...

Person2: Oh no! Turbulence!

*** Back at Control Box ***

SUPER: What the %$#^ is going on? I've just gotten numerous reports from the Office of Paranormal Activities, suggesting that purple rodents just got dropped over Krytenia.

Shim: Actually, that's marsupials, and it's West Starblaydia now.

SUPER: I don't care. It's another crisis.

Wang: It doesn't look like that that's the end either...

*** Over Starblaydia ***

Person1: We've got to these sesquicentennial elephants from some country to some other country in pristine purple condition for some person who loves the colour purple before it gets too late...

Person2: Oh no! Turbulence!

*** Back at Control Box ***

SUPER: Yep, they've lost their minds. Now it's raining purple elephants in Starblaydia.

Wang: Well, as long as people forget about Jeruselem, I'm saved!

Shim: I doubt that. You forget what kind of people the Jeruselemites are.

Wang: Sluts?

Shin: No. Catholic.

THE EMPIRE TIMES


TROUBLE HITS THE EAGLES
Aesop Breaks Leg

Today's training for the Eagles next match against United Heztel and the rest of the tournament took a turn for the worst when striker Aesop landed heavily which saw him initially taken off to medical treatment for sprained ankle. It was determined a short time later that he had indeed broken his leg, the team doctor Dr. Luke Monday confirmed for us that it is a green stick fracture, and will be out for the next couple of months. The brake will come as a shock to the U21 international team who have benefited from his skills throughout this tournament.

Manager Copper said "Yes it is a disappointment that Aesop will no longer be able to continue as a part of this team. I wont say that it is the end of the team, we have both Shane Taylor and Edward Bean, both are fully capable of filling the role that Aesop has left". It is understood that Connawarra Aesop's team have expressed regret at Aesop's injury with a club spokesman saying that they hope that Aesop recovers well soon and that they have dispatched a club medical officer to check up on him.

The team has been busy in their training for further games in the cup, to prevent any more performances like the one against Yarfor 2. Club captain Alex Burner said exclusively to The Empire Times "We do not want to play like we did against Yarfor 2, so it is important for us to train harder than we have previously, unfortunately we had a player injured but that isn't going to stop us any teams that will be playing us better be prepared for a long hard and tough game".

MATCHDAY FOUR

Group A
Kenavt 1-3 Starblaydia
Candelaria And Marquez 2-3 Jeruselem
The Macabees 4-0 Lovisa

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Jeruselem 12 4 4 0 0 11 3 8 Q
Starblaydia 9 4 3 0 1 7 4 3
The Macabees 7 4 2 1 1 11 6 5
Candelaria and Marquez 7 4 2 1 1 10 8 2
Kenavt 0 4 0 0 4 4 13 -9 E
Lovisa 0 4 0 0 4 0 11 -11 E

Group B
Fmjphoenix 0-5 Daehanjeiguk
Pablicosta 1-1 Milchama
Taeshan 0-2 Gwaine

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Daehanjeiguk 12 4 4 0 0 15 4 11 Q
Gwaine 7 4 2 1 1 8 7 1
Taeshan 6 4 2 0 2 3 6 -3
Pablicosta 5 4 1 2 1 4 4 0
Fmjphoenix 3 4 1 0 3 2 8 -7 E
Milchama 1 4 0 1 3 4 7 -3 E

Group C
Elves Secutiry Forces 2-1 Bazalonia
Newmanistan 4-1 Cafundeu
Ofedestan 3-3 Fujisawan Territories

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Newmanistan 12 4 4 0 0 14 6 8 Q
Elves Security Forces 7 4 2 1 1 9 7 2
Fujisawan Territories 5 4 1 2 1 8 7 1
Cafundeu 5 4 1 2 1 9 10 -1
Ofedestan 4 4 1 1 2 6 10 -4 E
Bazalonia 0 4 0 0 4 3 9 -7 E

Group D
Yafor 2 1-2 West Starblaydia
Nethertopia 0-0 Agroprom
Blouman Empire 2-0 United Heztel

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Blouman Empire 10 4 3 1 0 10 4 6
West Starblaydia 9 4 3 0 1 6 6 0
Nethertopia 7 4 2 1 1 5 3 2
Yafor 2 4 4 1 1 2 4 5 -1 E
Agroprom 4 4 1 1 2 3 4 -1 E
United Heztel 0 4 0 0 4 2 8 -6 E

Shin & Shin & Hwang: GOOO...OOOAL!!!...!!!

Wang: Oh great, more football fans.

Shim: Come on, cheer up! We're winning! 4-nil at the moment!

Wang: I would be happier if you guys didn't cheer every 15 minutes!

Shim: We wouldn't be cheering if we weren't scoring. Come on! Cheer with us!

Wang: Um. No.

Hwang: He's always like this. It's like he hates football or something about it. I don't know.

Wang: I can hear you, Hwang. Stop acting like I'm not even here.

Hwang: See, he does that too. He's always so bossy. It's like he's got an inferiority complex, and always has to be bossy over everything, and ruin the fun too.

Wang: How is ruining the fun bossy, and how on earth do I have an inferiority complex?

Shin: It's such a shame. He's quite handsome too.

Wang: Stop talking as if I weren't here!

Shin: Did you hear that?

Wang: Ugh...

Shim: Don't worry. I know that you're here.

Wang: Thank you, Shim. It's always nice to know that you're acknowledged.

Hwang: Maybe that's it. He likes to be acknowledged for everything, as if life is a contest and he has to be number one! Yes.

Shin: Oh you're so smart, Hwang. *the two cuddle and kiss*

Shim: So immature, aren't they?

Wang: I guess they're meant to be together?

Shim: Oh, and what about us?

Wang: Ummmm... Hey, look they just scored!

Shin & Shin & Hwang: GOOO...OOOAL!!!...!!!

Wang: %$#^.

SUPER: There's a crisis in Candelaria And Marquez!

Wang: We didn't hit any of the buttons!

SUPER: I don't think you did! A bunch of bombs blew up, and some of their people are blaming us.

Hwang: For what? Just because we dropped a bunch of beans over them doesn't mean that we want to hurt them.

SUPER: They don't know that, and they probably don't want to know that. It's the Mujeongbu.

*alarm goes off*

SUPER: Alright, alright, so I said the word! Just shoot me already! *tranquilizer dart shoots SUPER in neck* Wait for a few hours before I wake up again. *falls to sleep*

Shin: Wow, I didn't know that Mujeongbu was an outlawed word.

*alarm goes off - tranquilizer dart shoots Shin in the neck*

Shim: Oh great, now Hwang doesn't have anyone to cuddle anymore.

Hwang: Don't worry. I'll just say Mujeongbu, and wait for her.

*alarm goes off - tranquilizer dart shoots Hwang in the neck*

Wang: Why are we surrounded by imbeciles?

Shim: At least they're all asleep now.

Wang: Yeah...

Shim: Wanna...?

Wang: Of course!

*each grabs a pillow*

Wang and Shim: PILLOW FIGHT! *start to whack each other with pillows*

MBC Interview with Coach Yu

MBC: Well, it's another great victory, and it seems that the Han are on a roll on their way to the knockout stages in the DBC for the first time. Coach Yu, here with us, has been with the team for the whole tenure. Coach Yu, what's changed over the years?

Yu: Well, I think it's probably a combination of us having experience and the convict coach who's happily going to be staying with the team once his citizenship is reinstated.

MBC: That's nice. Tell us about this convict coach.

Yu: Well, he was serving time in one of the prisons out in Shingang Province - the middle of the desert kind. His sentence was life imprisonment for the sexual molestation of a goat's owner's daughter.

MBC: Hmmm, didn't you think that putting a former sex offender in the ranks of the football team would be bad news?

Yu: Well, I needed the scariest man possible to instill discipline in the team, so I volunteered to sponsor his work with the team. I think it was very successful. Besides, he was a sex offender against goat's owner's kids. As far as I knew, none of the players were the sons or daughters of goat owners.

MBC: Genius, if I ever knew it.

Yu: Well, I think the convict got the better bargain, with his stick-whacking prowess. He passed the Imperial examination today, proving his ability to act as a normal citizen, as long as he avoids goat's owner's children.

MBC: Well, about this DBC season. What do you think about that Milchama match?

Yu: Random, if I ever knew it. For some reason, every time we scored, their team would rise up in some operatic song. And then the last goal near the end of regulation, I guess everyone had the same idea about singing some chorus. I had never heard the words before, but I somehow knew how to sing it. I still don't know what I sang.

MBC: Well, we have a panel of listeners of opera, and they all suggest that you were all singing the finale of an act of an opera by some Italian composer.

Yu: Yeah, it might have been.

MBC: Well, it's our great pleasure to see yet another fabulous showing, with a 5-0 thrashing against Fmjphoenix. What do you have to say?

Yu: All of our players were fantastic. Our strikers are finding the net and our defenders are also keeping the ball. It was just a great show of teamwork for all of the players, I can't say who's greater than anyone else. We certainly have the skill to win this tournament. But it's still a long way off, and we need to focus all of our attention on this final match against Pablicosta, who's lying on the edge of qualification. They'll need a lot of luck, but they'll be playing with heart to win out their share of the tournament and have a chance. We get in no matter what, so it's a comfort zone that might put the players at too much ease ahead of this match. At this point, nothing short of a win against Pablicosta will be acceptable.

MBC: And there you've heard it. A win against Pablicosta. We wish you luck on your continued run of luck as we go out to watch some more of the action.

Yu: It's my pleasure to be here.

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS CLINCH GROUP C WITH WIN

Starblaydia- Last night, the Rockets took on Cafundeu for the first time, and knocked off the junior side of the world power by an impressive score of 4-1. With the win, Newmanistan improved to 4-0-0 in group play and were able to clinch the group title. Their 5 point margin over second place Valanora means they will stay on top of the table regardless of what happens in their final group match with Bazalonia. Newmanistan is one of three teams off to a perfect start thus far, with Jeruselem and Daehanjeiguk also 4-0-0. They lead Group A and Group B respectively.

There was no lack of motivation for this game against Cafundeu. The vocal Jeremy Brooker wanted this game more then anything, given that he now plays his football in that nation. Perhaps, he provided coach Carson with some valuable insight on some of the opposing players that game tape couldn’t pick up. He was also certainly excited about being assigned to Alves, his teammate at Dunboor FC. At the start of the match, it seemed as though Newmanistan simply wanted the game a little more then their opponents as they were winning a lot of the tight one-on-one battles, and effectively controlling possession. This would be rewarded with an early tally, off the foot of Jennifer Vilardi, who took a nice pass from Shawn Drummond and beat Salathiel to his left, for a 1-nil lead in the 9th minute. Afterwards, both teams had their moments, with Cafundeu working hard to get back into it, and the Rockets trying to extend the lead. The feeling to all those watching this game was that scoring the next goal was critical for both teams. The teams sensed it, and in the 28th minute Alex Parnett had a bit of a pushing match with Renildo. Our official did a good job maintaining order, by showing each a prompt yellow card. The cards may have came out a little quick for each player in the eyes of some, but this was surely a statement by the ref that he would have none of it. Not to long after, Parnett channeled his emotions on the football, and drilled a nice shot from just outside the penalty area that beat Salathiel. There it was, that critical goal, in the 33rd minute. 2-nil Rockets, and this is where we headed to halftime.

At the intermission, Brian Carson was obviously pleased with the effort, but just to make sure there would be no let up, he reminded the team of what happened in the senior side’s recent game with Blouman Empire in the Oxen Cup. There, Newmanistan trailed 2-0 at intermission, and rallied to win 3-2. So here, surely Cafundeu would be capable of the same kind of comeback.

Cafundeu came out hard in the second half, going on an all out attack. But in the 49th minute, Jeremy Brooker intercepted a pass intended for Alves and made a mad dash upfield. Wouldn’t it be sweet, he thought, if he could score here? But eventually, his wisdom took over and realized the best thing to do was pass to Jeremy McAllister. J-Mac took the pass, and maneuvered around the only player, Japa, who had a chance to stop him. In on goal, he blasted a shot past a hopeless Salathiel to give the Rockets a 3-nil lead. Officially, coming in the 50th minute. Cafundeu would not give up, and still tried to pursue the issue with aggressive attack, as they needed the points. But again, it would backfire, this time, Alex Parnett, who was also named man of the match for Newmanistan, made the interception and charged on goal before blasting his second of the game by Salathiel to make it 4-nil in the 55th minute. Despite that, you have to give Cafundeu credit. The heart and character of this team would not let up, and they still pushed hard, and deservedly, they were rewarded, on a 70th minute Lacera goal. Too little, too late, but they deserved something for their effort. They never let up, and fought to the very end, but they would not get any closer. A big win for Newmanistan, 4-1 the final. Winless Bazalonia is next. Despite their record, they are capable of victory, so they should not be taken lightly.

Here is some post game reaction:
Carson: “Very, very pleased tonight. We played about as good as we possibly could against a very good team, who despite the score, played hard until the final minute.”

Brooker: “This may have been one of the most fun games I ever played. But I am really glad we got the win, because I’ll never forget my roots.”

Parnett: “We got locked into a dogfight early. We had the better start and got the first goal, and I think from there we saw a great match. We took advantage of our opportunities, and I think that is the main reason behind this result.”

McAllister: “Absolutely pleased. We’ve won all four games thus far, have clinched the group and have sent the message that we are doing whatever it takes in the effort to defend our title. We’ll be ready for Bazalonia, too. We’d love to say we beat the junior clubs of both of the World Cup 40 finalists!”

Random Military Checkpoint: Stevidian-Macabee International Border, Former Guffingford

Sergeant First Class Samel Penk, commander of the third tank in his tank squadron, was comfortably seated in his commander’s chair inside the large, triangular turret of the Macabee Nakíl 1A2. This steel beast was unlike any other and at sixty-tons was one of the most heavily armored monsters of its class in the world, able to stop the majority of 120mm armor-piercing discarding-sabots along the frontal-120º arc of both the turret and chassis. This tank, of which soon there would be three hundred thousand of in service of the Macabee Ejermacht, was a war winning weapon, and it sat plainly visible across the invisible dividing line which separated Stevidian Guffingford from Imperial Guffingford, mocking the Stevidian soldiers across the way. It had proven its blatant superiority over all of its adversaries during the ferocious War of Golden Succession, knocking-out powerful opponents, such as the Havenic KAF-90 and the Stevidian Challenger 3, from ranges exceeding four thousand meters. The Nakíl’s powerful electrothermal-chemically augmented 120mm main gun proved to be a match for any other tank in its class, accurately placing a Macabee anti-tank round into the side of a foe’s turret. Now, this tank sat on the border, serving as an ever-present reminder of what a land war with the Second Empire of the Golden Throne meant – defeat. And this particular checkpoint could count on an entire tank regiment or somewhere around one hundred and twenty main battle tanks. Most were neatly organized in a tank park some eleven clicks north of the checkpoint, far away from the border, but around twenty were positioned directly across the Stevidian contingent, showing off their brute force.

Today, these tanks were more ornamental than other days. The checkpoint’s leadership had decided to honor an expected victory in the Di Bradini Cup over Lovisa with a ‘twenty-gun salute’, and so had ordered the tanks physically present at the checkpoint to organize themselves in such a way that they could fire into the air, with shells heading the opposite direction of the Stevidian border, all at the same time. As a consequence, the twenty or so Nakíl tanks were pointing the other way, awaiting the end of the game. Macabee infantry were scratching their heads and wondering what was happening, unless some lucky bloke had been told what was going on, while the Stevidians were probably even more confused. Given the necessity for an immediate salute when it was ‘officially known’ that the game had been won, most of the tankers, such as Sergeant Samel Penk, found themselves watching the game in miniature personal screens in their seats for the entire ninety or so minutes. It wouldn’t be rare to find that each tank had its air conditioning system running continuously, even while the tank wasn’t moving, using the lithium-ion under armor auxiliary power unit to keep the system going. Fortunately, given the fact that the Nakíl 1A2 used a gas turbine it wouldn’t take long to get the engines up and running, even if the batteries wore out – the batteries could be recharged once the gas turbines were put back online. Besides the air conditioning system, most tankers were running their tank’s coffee machines or tea kettles (based on crew preference) running almost constantly, serving them hot drinks.

While watching the game, Sergeant Penk was also sending text messages to his fellow tank commanders – an advantage of being the ‘TC’ – with comments on the game. All Nakíl series tanks, since the Nakíl 1A2, had been fitted with this type of communication system, which allowed for easy communication during battle. Such ease of communications had given Macabee tank units a clear advantage over the less versatile Havenic tank units during the War of Golden Succession, meaning entire Havenic tank armies were surrounded and ‘eliminated’. Besides war, it also made great fun during peacetime maneuvers, or doing strange things like what was occurring that very day. In the case of the sergeant, the game was entering the last fifteen minutes and the Imperials were leading three to zero against the Lovisan national U-21 football team. Most tankers were already ecstatic and just waiting for the referee to blow the whistle. Fortunately, the game was fairly clean, given that the Lovisan national team was already demoralized after three straight losses and was not really looking to win, or even score. The game had been completely dominated by the Macabee team, and they were showing their full potential as offensive machines, while maintaining a brick-like defense to avoid goals hitting their own net. More or less the same thing was happening; Lovisan defenders would frantically kick the ball out of the goal box and either the Macabee midfield would automatically recover, or Lovisan midfielders would pass it around until it was lost. The Lovisans were having trouble getting the ball to the ‘danger zone’, except for a few occurrences, and were allowing the Macabee players to dominate. Finally, minute eighty-six had come and Mika D’Angíel, who had not yet scored, received a well-placed ball near the center corridor, leading the opponent’s net. The young player skillfully dribbled it past three defenders and from near the penalty kick area put the ball into the net, making the game four to zero.

Suddenly, Sergeant Penk rose from his seat, almost hitting the top of his head against the closed commander’s tank-roof hatch, and yelled, ‘GOOOOOOOOOAAAAAALLLLLLL.’ His joy was so overwhelming that he felt the necessity of repeating himself, ‘GOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOAAAAAAAAAAALLLLLLLLLLLLLL’. He sat down, got back up, sat down, got back up and then decided to open the hatch, stick his head out, and yell, ‘YEA, THAT’S RIGHT. GOAL!’ With that, he recomposed himself, closed the hatch and sat back down to watch the remainder of the game. But the snide smile on his face never left, as one could see the dimples form where his lips curved in glee. In usual fashion, he proceeded to type things like, yea, we’re the best, and, what’s Jeruselem going to do, through the tank’s messaging program.

As the game neared its end, the tanks were already preparing for the ‘twenty-gun salute’ by having the gunner elevate the barrel to roughly 7º, which meant that the breech would have to descend into the turret basket, while the autoloader was told by the tank commander to load an armor-piercing fin-stabilized discarding-sabot into the combustion chamber. The vehicle’s did so in unison, and the infantry around the checkpoint watched in amazement. These type of actions had only taken place during the war, and it normally signaled an artillery bombardment, although the fact that the tanks were pointing in the wrong direction perhaps suggested otherwise. Nevertheless, the Stevidians across the ‘line’ must have been pulling on their hairs, wondering what was going on and preparing for the worst. Communiqués back to the Stevidian Home Islands were probably being sent a dime a dozen, as Stevidian commanders warned their leadership about the impending danger. Realistically, there wasn’t much threat of war, but every soldier thought and probably hoped for the worst – the two armies were waiting for the chance to grasp at each other’s throats. The key would be to fire at the same time, and consequently the honor of giving the order was awarded to the regiment’s commander, Colonel Hans Luck. This man was a stable commander, but mistakes during the war had ultimately caused his plantation as a regimental commander in a border station, whereas he could have been in Theohuanacu – although, this has its own disadvantages. Regardless, this was probably the most exciting thing he did since the War of Golden Succession!

Then, the referee blew his whistle signaling the end of the Macabee game against Lovisa, ending with a four to zero victory for the Imperials. Within seconds Colonel Hans Luck managed to push back the excitement and order, ‘Pip, pip, huzzah!’ The twenty guns fired all at once, and the shockwave of the propellant escaping through the muzzle break could probably be heard by infantry units for at least two kilometers all around, while the actual bombardment could have most likely been heard from over ten kilometers distance! Thick black smoke billowed from the cannon’s lips, covering their respective tanks for a brief second, and almost hiding the extensive muzzle flash produced by the guns. It was a most spectacular sight, with the brief flash of red and orange, with the occasional blue, which colored the normally dull blue sky. The most surprised would probably be the Guffingfordi civilians who worked at the checkpoint at chefs, security personnel, logistics crew and that type of labor, who had probably never seen a tank fire its guns in their lives. Those who managed to be outside during the moment were already picking up their jaws from the pavement below them, trying to recompose themselves before the sight of the Macabee soldiers around them. Suddenly, some five seconds later, a second salvo was propelled into the air, and ten seconds later a third. With the three salvos completed the tanks began to lower their main guns, while the tank commanders were putting the mandatory imperial flag – the double-headed eagle with the iron crosses – over their tank’s roof, so that all looking from above could see the immense pride they had in their Empire, and in their football team.

As soon as the cacophony had begun, however, it ended. The tanks turned on their engines and began to reposition themselves in their original locations. Although football was nice and fun, and sometimes justified illegal activity such as a three-round salvo, one had to know when it was time to play and when it was time to be serious. And, now was a time to be serious. The Stevidian contingent across the line was responding, and the rumble of the Challenger’s diesel engine was quite obvious to all. The large tank moved up to the Stevidian checkpoint building, which within itself wasn’t illegal – it was Stevidian territory, after all – but served to force the twenty or Nakíl tanks respond by quickly turning around, dispersing and preparing for a much ‘wanted’ duel. But, the Challenger opened its hatch, and a young, blonde man’s head poked out and he lifted up his arm and signaled at one of the Macabee infantrymen near the line. The infantryman nodded back and the Stevidian tank commander asked, ‘Excuse me chap, but would it be possible to speak to the checkpoint’s commander?’

The Macabee soldier had a little trouble understanding the thick Stevidian English accent at first, especially given that Macabee soldiers spoke Dienstadi and not English (although English could be considered a second official language, given how widely it was spoken throughout the Empire), but in the end the message got through his head. The infantryman shuffled his feet, as it was not customary for a man of his rank to go directly to the general who commanded the checkpoint, and he responded, ‘Isn’t there some type of official channel you can speak through?’

The Stevidian tank commander arched his right eyebrow and yelled out,’ Sorry, but I can’t hear you.’ The infantryman pointed at the tank’s engine and the tank commander smiled, nodded and crawled back into his turret. A few seconds later the hulking diesel engine was put to a stop and peace was returned to the area (it should be noted that gas turbines are much more quiet than diesel engines), and the tank commander popped back out and asked, ‘What was that?’ The infantryman repeated himself, and then the Stevidian said, ‘Well, yes, but we thought this would be quicker. There’s always such a hustle and bustle to get to talk to you blokes and we thought to just ask you.’

The infantryman thought, fair enough, and went to go ask his sergeant if someone could contact the unit commander. But, it wasn’t necessary. Sergeant First Class Penk was watching the entire scene and decided to take initiative and walk over to the line and talk to the Stevidian tank commander himself. He quickly pushed himself out of the hatch and used the guide rails along the turret to place himself on firm ground, below. He briskly walked over to where the infantryman was and told the private to go back to work, and the private did what he was told. Then, Sergeant Penk oriented himself over to the Stevidian commander, who was watching bewildered, and said, ‘What’s the problem?’

The other tank commander’s lips thinned, but he responded, ‘Well, it’s not every fuggin’ day you guys host a bombardment, you know?’

Sergeant Penk smiled, ‘We just won another match in the Di Bradini Cup, so forgive us if we’re a bit over excited.’

‘Well, perhaps it would be better if you warned us next time? For example, do you plan to do the same thing if you win the game against Jeruselem? It’s a bit unnerving to hear and watch a bombardment, given the current circumstances.’ The Stevidian was stumbling on his own words by this time, but continued, ‘I just think it would be fair if you told us what was going on before it happened. But, I guess we know that it will happen again if you chaps win the game against Jeruselem. You know, that’s all. I just wanted to know my chances of getting knocked-out in the next couple of minutes, that’s all.’ The Macabee commander smiled and nodded and his Stevidian counterpart asked, ‘How much did you guys win by, anyways?’

‘Four to zero. Wonderful game.’

The man in the Challenger 3 chuckled and replied, ‘So, those Lovisans still haven’t scored a single goal? Poor chaps, they probably deserve less humiliation. Well, the best of luck to your team in the next game! I really wish that our government would sponsor teams to foreign competitions, as well, but alas what can we do?’

Samel Penk decided to add in a snide remark, although obviously sarcastically, and said, ‘We’d beat you anyways.’

The Stevidian rolled his eyes and retorted, ‘Yea, well, tell that to our boys at Otium Aqua!’ With that, the Stevidian tank commander buttoned himself up back into his tank turret, after saluting the Macabee sergeant, and the tank turned around and headed back to where it had come from. In response, the sergeant did an about face and returned to his tank, thinking about the conversation he had just had with a Stevidian. It had been a long time since he had last had a comfortable and even pleasant conversation with a Stevidian soldier, especially since most of his past conversations were with prisoners of war he had taken during the battles against the Stevidian XXX Corps in Safehaven. It was only a testament to the fact that football could bring two enemies together in peace and harmony, even if only temporarily. It’s worth mentioning and reminding that Stevid had been attacked by two nuclear bombs torpedoes into one of their largest harbors during the war, and that in return Stevid had launched a nuclear attack over parts of the northern province of Dienstad – ultimately, it was the threat of all-out nuclear war that brought all the sides to the peace tables thereafter. As a consequence, there was much reason for both sides to dislike each other, besides the usual comparisons between armies and navies and whatnot (the former being the glory of the Second Empire and the latter being the pride of the Holy Empire – Stevid). Football could change the world …

Starblaydia: During the game …
Sometime prior to the final events at the military checkpoint in Guffingford

Mika D’Angíel’s hair dropped near to his eyebrow, as the sheer amount of sweat weighted it down. Despite the fact that his team was dominating the game, they were putting more effort than one watching it could imagine. The team had learned it lessons in the past games to not underestimate their opponents and to put everything they had into victory. This had been best illustrated in the last game against Kenavt, which had managed to score a goal against the Macabee U-21 team. Despite the sheer amount of determination being put by Mika, he had not yet scored a goal, despite the fact that he was the team’s pichichi (top scorer). The team’s other rising star and the man who had replaced Werst Bry as the second striker, Luí Gaspor, had managed an impressive hattrick during the game, putting in one ball with his head in the 2nd minute, starting the victory very early in the game. Luí’s second goal came in the thirty-third minute, and the third goal early during the second-half – in the fifty-second minute. With this hattrick Luí had been pulled out and replaced with another striker, who was told to play more defensively and take care of the midfield. The coach was interested in shutting out the opponent from the game, as he didn’t want his team to be the only team insofar that the Lovisans had scored on. Although there was no doubt that Mika supported Luí, a player he considered almost his brother, there was always a bit of rivalry between star strikers, no matter how close knit the team was.

In this sense, Mika was experiencing a bit of jealousy. His usual goal had not yet come and he was running out of time. Besides, there were rumors that scouts had come to the game to watch him play, and he was very interested in gaining a contract in a primary league, anywhere in the world. It was likely that he would be chosen to play in the team’s national football team during World Cup 41, but it would be nice to secure a contract before the world cup. It was never too early to start making millions, and besides, Mika was interested in playing football with the ‘big boys’. Although he wouldn’t mind playing inside the Empire, contracts with foreign leagues tended to be far more lucrative in terms of both pride and monetary concessions. Therefore, he decided to ignore his aching muscles and focus on scoring the necessary goal. It was just tiring to sprint when you thought you had the ball and have a Lovisan defender frantically kick it out of the area, in order to clear the danger, and then have to return closer to the midfielders to set up some kind of play. Mika was also an ambitious player and so it wasn’t unusual to have off-sides called on him. So, Mika picked up the pace, his shorts covered with dirt after slipping a few times, or getting ‘tackled’ by a Lovisan player. He had a scrape in his right knee, after it had received many impacts over the tournament, and his left arm was sore from running for almost eighty minutes straight. With the intense training there wasn’t much of a chance to rest, even during the ‘rest days’ which tended to last twenty-four hours; twenty-four hours which were used to party, drink and score with women – not much rest, in the end.

The clock ticked eighty-one minutes, and Mika could feel each passing second. Then, Inest Teng, who had replaced Val Torres during half-time, recovered the ball from one of the Lovisan midfielders. Macabee playing was very fluid and it was one of their advantages. Mika watched for a second and locked views with Val, as the midfielder raised his head to look for a play, and then the striker set off running towards the goal, trying to outmaneuver as many defenders as possible. Seeing the play, Val tried for a long-pass to Mika, but the ball fell short and was recovered by one of the defenders, who quickly passed it as Mika pressured him. There was another attempt to clear the ball, but it hit the back of Luí Gaspor who managed to somehow take the ball and control it, but there were too many defenders ‘shark attacking’ him, making sure he couldn’t put in the fourth goal. It wasn’t long before Luí noticed that Mika was ready to pass behind the defender’s line, and passed the ball just before Mika hit the off-sides line. There was no flag raised by the linesmen and Mika was in the clear. By the time the defenders had noticed their tactical mistake, Mika had already shot. For the millions watching it would be a matter of seconds, but for Mika it was an eternity. His muscles twitched and tightened as he cocked back his leg to build momentum to hit the ball with as much force as he could. The range was close, but the sphere would have to go as fast as possible whilst still accurate in order to get past the goal keeper. Sweat poured down his face, blood began to trickle out of his right leg and energy pumped into his every muscle. His leg’s muscles were taking in blood and oxygen and so they expanded momentously as they came back, and his foot was almost a foot and a half away from his body, and then it contracted even more for a brief instant and began to relax as Mika’s leg began to head for the ball.

Milliseconds later the ball lifted off the ground, as rubber met rubber, and arched towards the left pole of the goal. It arched wildly, to the point where the goal keeper barely missed deviating the sphere’s path with his right hand, and then accurate entered the goal and hit the net with a swish. Goal. It took Mika a few milliseconds to notice it, as his body twisted to change the vector of his path as he continued running, but his head continued to look at the net. As his brain processed the images being registered by his eyes his expression changed from one of hope, exasperation and work to one of glee and ecstasy. His brain could then hear, I’ve just scored. His arms went up in celebration and he began to run towards the crowd, taking off his short and flailing it wildly in the air, while screaming for the sake of his goal. Behind him, fellow players, including Luí Gaspor, were running towards him to catch up and celebrate his goal along with him – most had expected it to come, but didn’t know when. All could see the Macabee fans rise from their seats in unison and celebrate as well, whistling, howling and jumping in the air. Most were waving Macabee flags or banners, and the stadium filled with white and black, as the double-headed imperial eagle made its presence in the stadium. Mika’s face was covered from ear to ear with a wide smile, as he thought to himself, finally.

Luí Gaspor jumped on Mika’s back first, and yelled out, ‘Fuckin’ A, four to zero, homie. Fuggin’ nice goal, brother.’

Excited, Mika retorted, ‘Hell yea! You and I are unbeatable. Motherfuckin’ dynamic duo.’

Mika, the new star of the game (although, it was difficult to defeat a hattrick in terms of popularity), was soon crowded by the other players, who started to give him compliments and cheer without end. It was, after all the fourth goal, but even the fourth goal was one to celebrate for a team not accustomed to win a game – especially by this wide a margin. Even in the game against Kenavt, their two point lead in the first-half was quickly dropped when Kenavt scored a goal during the beginning of the second-half, and so the third goal was less exciting than one could imagine. This time, however, Mika had scored a fourth goal, without the Lovisan team even coming close to the Macabee score marker. Although mean and overconfident, and perhaps a bit cynical as well, people were more celebrating the fact that the Imperials were shutting-out their opponents, more than Mika’s goal, per sé. The celebration continued for quite some time, as even the Lovisan team was weary of putting the ball back into play, just in case there was a fifth or even a sixth goal. Despite the fact that they had not been able to score on any opponent during the tournament, to date, it still didn’t make them feel the necessity to allow more goals on themselves – besides, one could only have expected for them to want to show who they were in their next game, against Kenavt. And so, some two minutes or so were ‘wasted’ with the celebration, but nobody really cared. Even the Lovisan coach, by this time, had his head buried in both of his hands, wondering of his fate after the tournament (would any team hire him?).

There was not much left to the rest of the game. The Lovisan team stopped attempting to create plays to score a revenging goal, and just focused on defensive play and on keeping control of the ball long enough to limit the amount of chances the Macabee strikers and midfielders could create for themselves. But, there wasn’t much interest from the Macabee team for a fifty goal, even given the possibility. They were already happy with their current status, and Mika’s lust for a goal had just been satiated. Four to zero was not a bad result – well, for the winning team, at least -, not bad at all, and even the fans had received more than they had ever imagined. News quickly filtered through the ranks of crazed fans that Candelaria and Marquez had just lost their match against Jeruselem, which meant that with the goal difference achieved this game the Macabees were third in the group – most had expected to be either fourth or fifth, and some had even expected last place in the group. Of course, none of the fans really thought about the consequences of the Jeruselem game, although of course it was the only potential outcome that would allow The Macabees to remain competitive for a potential pass to the finals (however unlikely this was). The last match in the group stage would be against Jeruselem, who had won every game insofar, and was considered one of the best teams in the tournament. The Imperials would be hard pressed to win against Jeruselem, even if they had managed a draw with Candelaria and Marquez (which assumed that there was an equal chance to defeat Jeruselem, as Candelaria and Marquez had had). Soon enough, this reality would hit upon the excited Macabee players on the field.

When the referee declared the end of the game, by blowing his whistle twice, the Macabee team filtered into their dressing room without too much of a celebration outside – this would be reserved just in case they managed to get past group finals; there was enough ambition between the players to allow for hope. Inside the dressing room, as they prepared to hit the cold showers, Coach Derek Vadíern walked in with a big smile on his face. Mika looked and saw and commented, ‘Four to zero, boss.’

Vadíern chuckled and said, ‘Indeed, Mika, indeed. Guess who we play next?’

Everyone’s smile faded and in the background one could hear, ‘Fuck.’

This was bad news. The game against Jeruselem would require a lot of training, despite this day’s clear victory. They would have to work on their defense, to stop the opponent’s strikers from getting close enough to score, and the Macabee strikers would have to train to get past Jeruselem’s tough wall-like defense. Albeit a bit ‘racist’, there was a running joke calling Jeruselem’s goal net Masada, which historically speaking was a fortress on top of a mesa that had held out to Roman forces for the better part of a year. But, there were always good intentions. Mika spoke up again, ‘More hard trainin’, sarge?’ Others in the room managed to laugh.

Vadíern retorted, ‘Yea, I’m going to smoke you guys from dawn ‘till dusk baby. We have a chance of winning this game against Jeruselem, because I know it and because I believe in your asses. A lot of people have called me crazy for the latter, but I truly believe that you guys have something more in your blood than bubblegum and sugar. Besides, you guys have played enough Madden to know the game by now, right?’

One of the defenders rolled his eyes and said, ‘Gee thanks, coach.’

Mika, smiling, said, ‘Yea, you’ve played enough of those fantasy manager games to actually coach us, right?’ Everyone laughed at this joke, and even the coach cracked a smile.

‘Yea, screw you boy,’ responded Derek Vadíern. He looked at his watch and said, ‘You blokes better hit the damn showers, ‘cuz your day is running out. Remember, tomorrow is when drilling begins and we have a lot of drilling ahead of us.’ People groaned at this, but the coach ignored them, ‘I want to see the best come out of you folks in this game against Jeruselem, you understand?’

‘SIR, YES, SIR,’ they said in unison, obviously mocking the coach. That said, they hit the showers and within thirty minutes most had hit the streets, looking for some fun and adventure. Most of these guys, still under the legal age, were just moving into the world of ‘drugs, sex and rock and roll’ and so freedom in Starblaydia was a big thing for them. All of them would have to get their ‘booze’ and bring it back to the hotel room to drink it, but this was common place and they were paying enough per room for the hotel staff to look in the opposite direction. The team had its terminology for this, including ‘scouting’ (looking for ‘bitches’), ‘bidding’ (getting someone off the street, like a fan, buy them the alcohol) and ‘scoring’ (we all know what this one is). All of them would have hangovers for next day’s drilling, but this was usual and by this time the team’s doctors had ‘antidotes’ to put them back into mental shape. Even though the coach wanted to have all the time he could get to prepare his boys for the Jeruselem game, he didn’t want to demoralize them by not allowing them to party to celebrate today’s victory. Besides, coach Vadíern was happy with the victory, too – he just didn’t show it. Then again, he never showed any type of emotion … ever.

Theohuanacu
During war, there’s not much to celebrate ...

Theohuanacu was perhaps the Empire’s one big mistake after the War of Golden Succession. It was an island nation southeast of the Empire, by at least a dozen thousand kilometers. Theohuanacu’s history was one of glory, prosperity and denied hopes and dreams. She had suffered a nuclear holocaust at the hands of Guffingford (who was now, ironically occupied by the Empire, as well) and her central government had collapsed on its own foundations. For dozens of years she was nothing more than a country in name, actually divided and owned by dozens of war lords, drug lords and politicians that managed peace in their fiefdoms by shuffling a lot of illegally gained money. Now, about half the country had fallen into the hands of the Empire, who had managed to avoid war with Adaptes Astrates, despite acting in this country’s back yard. The Empire was starting to regret their decision, despite the economic benefits – petroleum and large reconstruction and decontamination contracts. Nevertheless, already hundreds had died to a small insurgency, which was bound to grow, and there was not much the Empire could do to severe the resistance. Units such as the i]Díenstadi Régulies[/i] (similar to the Foreign Legion) were in Theohuanacu, acting more violently than one could imagine, and the results were marginal. The Empire would need more and more manpower in Theohuanacu, and it was hard pressed to find it, especially when requiring troops to man a frontier with Stevid and Safehaven. This explained the growth spurt of the Díenstadi Régulies, who were all foreign and were being quickly deployed to Theohuanacu as the units were formed.

Insofar, one unit had managed to make quite a name for itself. This was the Doomani Harka ‘Invictus I’, who had already begun operating in conjunction with the Amastoli Harka of hunters (an Harka [H is silent] is the equivalent of a brigade, in this case). Many of the Doomani soldiers had already fought during the War of Golden Succession, waging a loosing battle in the sewers and rubble-strewn cobblestone streets of Weigar, against thousands of Weigari rebels armed well to the teeth and with freedom inset in their souls and hearts. Most of these survivors had been a part of the anabasis to Fedala, where they were forced to fight their way through the rear of the Weigari front, while battles were being waged to the death at Mons Dei and at the River Nestor. Thousands upon thousands of Doomani volunteers had died in a country that were not their own, and it was no surprise that the survivors now considered themselves Macabee in all respects. In fact, they had all been awarded citizenship and were given a plot of farm land in northern Safehaven (now Macabee territory) as concessions for their duty to the Empire. But, they were warriors and soldiers of fortune, and they could not avoid their lust for war. The Régulies were a way of getting paid well and a way of palling that insane love for killing and murder. Besides, in Theohuanacu the high command turned their head as the Doomani unit made a name for itself as a band of killers and enraged berserkers.

All of them were wounded, deformed or otherwise scarred in some way. Their brutal tactics and discrepancy for personal safety had earned them heavy losses, even this early in the war. Most of them carried the shrunken heads of their victims along their waist. They were known, along with the Amastoli Harka, for severing the heads of women, children and men alike and emplacing them on stakes along Macabee patrol routes, to show potential insurgents what would happen if they double-crossed the Empire. Just days before they had razed a village to the ground for housing rebel soldiers, and none of the population had survived. Most people would call them monsters and criminals of war, but they considered themselves police men. Their work was not fulfilling the word of God, or exporting their culture and ‘civilizing the savages’, or Darwinism. Their work was their own. They were their own gods, and their own masters. Their prize was the feeling of superiority over those that could do nothing to stop them. The feeling of being able to choose who dies and who lives – to feel godly. With this as their only goal, they had managed to instill fear into the local population, which had worked both for and against the Empire. Where the stepped, nothing would grow ever again. They killed entire families to make sure they could never repopulate again. There was no way to tell how many family names had been cut short of their potential, as all heirs were butchered the same. There was no differentiation between gender, as they were all savages. They were all lesser beings than cockroaches and lice, and there was no reason they should all die. This mentality was perhaps counterintuitive for a nation that wanted to establish peace by understanding, but the Empire only wanted peace, period. If they could not establish it humanely, they would have to kill everyone that stood between the Empire and economic stability.

Despite this violence, there was one thing that the Doomani soldiers enjoyed just as much as killing, and that was Macabee football. Their integration into the Empire as citizens had also managed to export the Macabee culture to them. And so, during the game most had suspended operations and were watching it. The victory had not startled them, since they were reassured of the Empire’s superiority in absolutely everything and nobody and nothing could really get through to them, ever. To celebrate the four to zero victory they had decided to take it out on the local population. Yes, sadly, this was how they ‘celebrated’, and most likely how they would act after a defeat, as well. Entire companies were sent into the jungle, looking for prey, entering villages and shooting innocent civilians on sight with their assault rifles. At one point, three Doomani Régulies entered a wooden shanty in one village and saw a woman, alone, scared for her life. Instead of instantly shooting her, they raped her in series and then tortured her by cutting off her breasts and other parts of her body, and then they shot her in the head. There was no fun in the Doomani way of war, and there was nothing to like nor nothing to think of as good. They were a violent, sadistic and insane bunch. But, the Empire was not looking for people with honor, only people that could win wars, and the Doomani soldiers gave them this. And so, unfortunately, events like these would continue to happen until they were rotated out of the country.

In another village, they decapitated one of the insurgents, who was guarding the town, and used his head as a football sphere, kicking it back and forth between each other, while randomly killing others with their assault rifles. One soldier started to repeat, ‘Look I’m Mika, look I’m Mika,’ while waving his hands in the air. What kind of human beings could do something like this? Why would God create such a race of monsters? Indeed, it made one think if God truly existed. In the end, this would fuel the insurgency, but on the other hand it kept the local population in check. The effects of such a slaughter would soon be felt country-wide, however …

The Emberton Chronicle
BEST IN THE WEST

More Eastern Promise

East Starblaydia - As the morning sun rises in the east, so the nation’s young lionhearts rose to the occasion in East Starblaydia last night with an inspiring victory over Yafor 2. The Westerners have bounced back from an opening-day thumping at the hands of Bloumany, and this two-one victory, their third in a row, moves them up to second place in the group.

Goals from the Smith brothers, Casper and Dalian, assured this victory, Casper hitting the mark with a crisp volley from fifteen yards in the first half, and Dalian added the second with a deflected long-range effort early in the second half. A late Yaforite goal was not enough to steal a point, and the victory saw the Westerners leapfrog their opponents and manoeuvre into the qualifying places with one game remaining.

That final game is against the team currently sitting third in the group, and the only team that can now overtake West Starblaydia and deny them a quarter-final spot: Nethertopia. A draw is all that is required to put the Westerners in the last eight; lose, and it's a short stay, and a short hop home.

GAZETA DO POVO - O JORNAL DA NAÇÃO CAFUNDELENSE
Sports Section - Articles written by Carlos Alberto Gujabre
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

IMPROVEMENTS DURING THE COMPETITION DISAPPEARED TODAY

Cafundéu's campaign in this Di Bradini Cup hasn't been regular. In the first game, a poor draw with Fujisawan Territories, which made some supporters believe that the team would make a horrible performance like the one of last Di Bradini Cup. After that, a more enjoyable draw with Valanora, a good result, but not one that made the supporters think that the team was playing well. Only the victory against Bazalonia excited the ones that have been following the team.

But, today, this excitement is gone. In a game that was much awaited, Cafundéu failed to make a good result. A positive result in this game would be enough for this team to get the confidence of the supporters and generate enough motivation for the team to fight for the title. But Newmanistan played too well, and the Monopolists weren't able to react after the opponents attacked fast and scored first. It wasn't a bad game for Cafundéu, although it wasn't any close from a good game.

Newmanistan attacked well since the start, using the talent of its players. The defensive midfield of Cafundéu, considered by some the worst sector of this team, failed to hold the opponent's attacks. And the defence, already considered weak, wasn't able to do that too. Before the tenth minute, Drummond (is the poet? No, it isn't the Cafundelense poet, it is the Newmanistani player) scored the first goal. After this goal, the game became much more disputed.

There were some violent moves too, but they were controlled by the Jeruselem referee, who has experience in this kind of games. Cafundéu seemed to prepare the reaction, as Alves nearly scored after receiving a pass from Rossi. Brooker appeared and hit the ball to send it for a corner. In the corner, Hubert fell inside the area and asked for a penalty. Rossi complained with the referee shouting very loud, and received a yellow card. And, minutes after, Parnett scored the second goal of Newmanistan.

In the second half, nothing changed. Although Cafundéu battled to react in the game, it was Newmanistan which scored the goal. Brooker appeared in the attack running with speed and passed the ball to McAllister, who had no difficulties to shoot and score another goal. The fourth goal was scored by an inspired Parnett, who dribbled Renildo before shooting. At that point, Cafundéu continued attacking to, at least, score a goal and not leave the field with an embarassing result.

Newmanistan noticed that the Monopolists seemed extremely worried in returning home with a minor loss and seemed to slow down, maybe understanding that Cafundéu's supporters would complain a lot with the still young players, something that could harm them. But they didn't stop completely. They were still able to make good plays and had more chances to score, but didn't score. Cafundéu attacked well, and, finally, the goal came. Rossi shot from outside the area, the ball hit the post, Alves took the rebound and shot, Hennis made an wonderful save, Túlio took the rebound and shot too, Parnett saved over the line... and Lacerda got the third rebound and shot to score the goal. 4x1 was the final result.

CAFUNDÉU 1x4 NEWMANISTAN

Place: somewhere in Starblaydia.
Attendance: not released.
Referee: Danny Korbel (Jeruselem).
MOTM: Alex Parnett (Newmanistan).

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/cafundeu.png CAFUNDÉU: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo (Platão 78'), Japa and Barba; Fabinho (Januário 63'), Rossi and Túlio; Hubert (Nando 45'), Alves and Lacerda.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/newmanistan.png NEWMANISTAN: Hennis; Brooker, Borsinger, Secrist and Harrison; Parnett, Stevens (Talcott 67') and Caufield; McAllister, Drummond and J.Vilardi (Rafferty 45').
Coach: Brian Carson.

Goals:CAF: Lacerda 70'.
NEW: Drummond 9' , Parnett 28'/55' , McAllister 50'.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Cafundéu – formation for game against Ofedestan: Salathiël; Cícero, Renildo, Montanha and Barba; Fabinho, Abreu and Túlio; Hubert, Alves and Lacerda.
Coach: Andreas Gilsoweller Veiga.

Match’s Referee: Alvaro Pestaroza (The Macabees).

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

DBC goalscorers:

3- Alves
2- Hubert
1- Túlio, Renildo, Fabinho, Lacerda

Valandil of Dorthonion had just finished unpacking his belongings, despite having been back home for three days already, when the phone rang. It was not unusual for his phone to be quite busy, with being the lead scout for Raynor City afterall, but recieving a phone call at just a little after eleven at night sure was. Grudgingly he went into the next room where the phone was and picked up the land-line in the middle of its' third ring.

"Hello, whom am I speaking to?"

"Ah Valandil, I was hoping you weren't asleep yet. It's Zeratul, your boss. Listen here, I have a favor to ask of you?"

"What that might be?" Valandil answered with a slight sigh.

"Well as you know, the transfer window is about to open for the Premiership, and tons of clubs are looking to add a player or two to help them make a title run. Well, seeing as how we're already stacked full of proven talent, the board and I have decided it's time to invest in some youth."

"I see where this is headed and the answer is no!"

"But Valandil, it's for the good of the club and the league. I'll even cover your expences."

"No! I just got home Zeratul. I've barely had time to catch up with my wife and get to the things I need to around the house."

"How about an extra 4 silver coins a week raise?"

"... dammit. Fine, I'll go, but it's not because I want to. Any particular matches you want me to try and get to?"

"The Starblaydia match if you can, and then the Newmanistan match. We have good relations with Starblaydia already, so it should be easier to nab talent off of them, while Newmanistan is showing some promise."

"Fine, I'll get the first plane out in the morning."

MATCHDAY FIVE

Group A
Lovisa 1-0 Kenavt
Candelaria And Marquez 2-2 Starblaydia
Jeruselem 1-1 The Macabees

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Jeruselem 13 5 4 1 0 12 4 8
Starblaydia 10 5 3 1 1 9 6 3
The Macabees 8 5 2 2 1 12 7 5
Candelaria and Marquez 8 5 2 2 1 12 10 2
Lovisa 3 5 1 0 4 1 11 -10
Kenavt 0 5 0 0 5 4 14 -10

Group B
Gwaine 1-0 Fmjphoenix
Pablicosta 1-3 Daehanjeiguk
Milchama 2-2 Taeshan

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Daehanjeiguk 15 5 5 0 0 18 5 13
Gwaine 10 5 3 1 1 9 7 2
Taeshan 7 5 2 1 2 5 8 -3
Pablicosta 5 5 1 2 2 5 7 -2
Fmjphoenix 3 5 1 0 4 2 9 -7
Milchama 2 5 0 2 3 6 9 -3

Group C
Fujisawan Territories 0-2 Elves Security Forces
Newmanistan 4-0 Bazalonia
Cafundeu 3-1 Ofedestan

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
Newmanistan 15 5 5 0 0 18 6 12
Elves Security Forces 10 5 3 1 1 11 7 4
Cafundeu 8 5 2 2 1 12 11 1
Fujisawan Territories 5 5 1 2 2 8 9 -1
Ofedestan 4 5 1 1 3 7 13 -6
Bazalonia 0 5 0 0 5 3 14 -11

Group D
United Heztel 0-0 Yafor 2
Nethertopia 1-2 West Starblaydia
Agroprom 1-1 Blouman Empire

Nation Pts. P W D L GF GA GD
West Starblaydia 12 5 4 0 1 8 7 1
Blouman Empire 11 5 3 2 0 11 6 5
Nethertopia 7 5 2 1 2 6 5 1
Yafor 2 5 5 1 2 2 4 5 -1*
Agroprom 5 5 1 2 2 4 5 -1
United Heztel 1 5 0 1 4 2 8 -6

*MD2 Tiebreaker Result: Yafor 2 1-0 Agroprom

Quarter-Final Matches
Jeruselem Vs Gwaine
Daehanjeiguk Vs Starblaydia
Newmanistan Vs Blouman Empire
West Starblaydia Vs Elves Security Forces

Shin & Shim & Hwang: BOO!!!

Wang: Okay, so the opponents scored. What's the big deal? We're still winning!

Shin: What's the big deal?

Shim: What's the big deal?

Hwang: What's the big deal?

Shin: What's the big deal?

Shim: What's the big deal?

Hwang: What is the big deal?

Wang: I don't know. I was asking you guys.

Shin: Two words: clean sheet.

Hwang: Clean sheets? I have clean sheets, if I wash them everyday. Of course, if I have a reason to wash them...

Shim: Not sheets, clean sheet. The goalkeeper gets a big bonus if he keeps a clean sheet. So far, we've gotten only 2 clean sheets out of our last 5 matches, which isn't too bad, considering that we're on the giving end of our scoring fest.

Wang: Okay, so we like clean sheets?

Shim: Of course, but we like a clean sheet better.

Hwang: I don't get it.

Shin: Of course you don't. But that's okay. At least you're vocal.

Wang: I don't like the vocal part. I just like the watching part. Makes things less tense. Don't you know?

Shin: I do, but vocal yelling and screaming makes it more exciting.

Wang: But more tense.

Shin: But more exciting.

Wang: But more tense.

Shin: But more exciting. *shoves Wang*

Wang: But more tense. *shoves back*

Shin: But more exciting. *shoves again*

Wang: But more tense. *shoves back again*

Shin: *yells* But more exciting! *shoves again*

Wang: *yells* But more tense! *shoves back*

SUPER: Is there a problem here?

Shin & Wang: *yell* No! *shoves SUPER*

SUPER: Evidentally not. But we've got news that a big fat toad was sitting on Monument Place in Candelaria And Marquez. Did any of you press the button?

Shim: Sir, that was a long time ago. Relatively at least. But no. No one's pressed the buttons. Why on earth do you people have so may buttons?

Hwang: In case of an emergency, please press buttons!

Shim: But it's so stupid.

Shin: Only in an emergency.

Hwang: Other times, it's just fun.

SUPER: But agonizingly painful. I have to deal with the reports; you don't.

Wang: And I'm glad that I don't have to deal with the reports.

Hwang: Hey look!

Shin & Shim & Hwang & SUPER: GOOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOOAL!!!...!!!...!!!...!!!...!!!

Wang: Ridiculously long cheering once again. What on earth convicts people to do that?

SUPER: I call it espirt du corps.

Wang: What the %$#^ does that mean, pardon my French?

SUPER: I don't know. It just means that you have to cheer your team on, no matter what.

Wang: I like the no matter what...

Shim: Well, if we win, we're slotted to play Starblaydia.

Hwang: Oh, those ugly, nasty, rude, vile, incompetent, discourteous, selfish, ignorant, barbaric...

Shim: Ummm, you do realize that they're the hosts of the tournament? Thinking critical things about the hosts is bad karma?

Hwang:...pig-footed, gullible, disenchanted, disadvantageous, raucous, melancholic...

Shin: He sounds like a dictionary now.

Wang: He sounds like Hwang. What difference does it make?

Shin: A dictionary sounds soooooooo handsome right now. *sighs*

Shim: That's the love sigh, right there.

Hwang:... arduous, belligerent, nefarious, noodletastic, far-fetched, gargantuan, meddling...

Wang: Where on earth does he come up with his %$#^?

SUPER: Probably a dictionary of adjectives. You should read one sometime.

Wang: Thanks. I'll pass.

Shim: Come on, let's just watch the rest of the game.

Shin: But Hwang is sooo smart.

Shim: And sometimes I doubt that you are.

Hwang:... fluffy Starblaydians.

Wang: Congratulations. You've just succeeded as confounding the purpose of insults. Would you like a prize?

Hwang: Oh, you dreadful, vicious, sadistic, sanitary, relishing...

Wang: There he goes again...

Sadie: Hey coach, who's this Gwaine team?
Coach: I don't know, first I've heard of them is they entered this cup.
Sadie: Not bad for a first ever cup!
Coach: Yes, not bad at all.

Sadie: Second to the Han isn't a bad effort.
Coach: We'd better be ready then against a team we don't know anything about.
Sadie: We should watch some of their games.
Coach: Yes, we are a military team. We must gather intelligence!

Sadie: I'll spy on them for you.
Coach: You have to subtle about this.
Sadie: Don't worry, I look just like any local civilian.
Coach: You're the last person we'd send, people know what Dallas girls look like. That's with and without clothes on.

Sadie: Can dye my hair and wear funny hat!
Coach: I don't you getting sexually molested or something by weirdos.
Sadie: When does that happen?
Coach: All the time, you lot can't shut ya legs

Sadie: I'll be alright, I can take care of myself. I am an army girl after all.
Coach: Being in the army doesn't mean you're a real solder. You're actually just a glorified secretary.
Sadie: Isn't that the job for the girls in the army?
Coach: I can see you're not exactly a feminist.

Sadie: I'm not stupid, I don't want people putting lead into me.
Coach: You are smarter than some in the army, it is full of idiots ready to kill themselves.
Sadie: Or kill someone else ...
Coach: Oh yes, the artillery idiots killed your Mum.

THE ROCKET REPORT

ROCKETS PERFECT IN GROUP STAGE

Starblaydia- It wasn’t that long ago that we were looking at our group, in awe of the teams that we would be facing in order to advance to the knockout stages. All of them seemed capable of success, ranging from the two nations who saw their senior squads play in World Cup 40, to the team that the Rockets defeated in the last Di Bradini Cup final. Plus there was a nation that Newmanistan began to have some history with in regards to transfers. Throw in an ambitious newcomer, and it looked like a chore. We have reached the conclusion of the group stage now, and Newmanistan defeated all of their opponents. Going 5-0-0 against that quality of competition is something that we must truly admire within Newmanistan. Another Cup with coach Brian Carson getting everything he can out of the team. Only Daehanjeiguk would share the distinction of going 5-0-0. The Han have been strong, but could be in tough against an inspired Starbladyi team in the first round of knockouts. Newmanistan will face the Blouman Empire, a squad that did not lose in group play, but did draw twice.

To get to this point, Newmanistan needed to defeat the World Cup 40 runners up from Bazalonia. They would do that with an impressive clean sheet victory. There could have been some concerns that this would be a bit of a let down game for the Rockets, given that they already were aware that they would win Group C, but to be able to say they beat both World Cup 40 nations was all the motivation they needed. True, they weren’t playing the senior squads of those nations, but when it comes to bulletin board material, you can forget about a detail like that. The Bazalonia club in the Di Bradini Cup has really been a far cry from their senior team. The young Bazalonians would not register a single point in group play, and actually had the worst record of all teams in the competition when factoring the goal differential of them and Kenavt.

From the opening whistle, Newmanistan took immediate control. They wanted to get the win, and their opponents seemed to just want to get the game over with and were going through the motions. At times, the Bazalonians looked inspired, but overall this match was all Newmanistan. The first goal took all of four minutes. Jeremy McAllister would add another one to his total, taking a nice pass from Matt Caufield, and heading it past the Bazalonian keeper. J-Mac goals are normally off his foot, and he doesn’t have as much of a reputation of scoring on headers, so this was a nice sight for Rockets fans. Newmanistan carried the play, but a few nagging offsides calls, and shots going wide, or saved by the keeper when they were on target kept the score at 1-nil a little longer then it seemed it would. Most teams in the situation Bazalonia was in would love to take advantage of the Rockets’ missed opportunities, but this club would not. Newmanistan held a dominating 70-30 possession advantage in the first half, but only managed the one goal.

The game was there for Bazalonia to steal away. Brian Carson knew this, and so did the Rockets. He did not go crazy on his team, as that wasn’t necessary. It was the little things the Rockets needed to improve on, such as staying onside, and better shot selection. He was confident by what he saw in the first half, that if his team could carry this out, then they should be able to hold on.

At the start of the second half, Bazalonia showed a bit more fire as they were likely chewed out by their manager at the end of the first half, and in the 49th minute, Corey Hennis would have to make his first official save of the match. The early stages were a bit more back and forth before the most damaging blow was delivered. It came in the 59th minute, with Jennifer Vilardi scoring her 5th goal of the competition, set up by McAllister, but it was an initial pass from Alex Parnett that really got the play started. The goal opened the flood gates, sucking all the life out of the Bazalonians. Quickly after, Dale Stevens scored his first goal of the competition with an innocent looking shot from about twenty yards. It came in the 63rd minute. With the Rockets up 3-nil, Carson used the opportunity to substitute in 3 players, all between the 65th and 72nd minute. In the match were Shannon Vilardi, Brian Rafferty, and Brent Treichler, with McAllister, Parnett, and Brooker all getting the rest of the game off. In the 77th minute, Rafferty would score his first goal of the tournament, assisted by Shawn Drummond. It was a sweet goal for Rafferty, given all that he has been through since being on the last Di Bradini team. The remaining time was quickly played out with both teams content to let 4-nil be the final.

Here is some post game reaction:

Carson: “It was nice to see how well we dominated this match. Also, given that we had some little nagging things about the first half that we needed to correct, the fact that we were able to do so and build on the lead is something that I enjoyed.”

Brooker: “Any time we can get a clean sheet, it rocks. We didn’t have a whole lot to do in the back end today, but when it came time for us to defend, we weren’t going to let them have a chance.”

Borsinger: “We are all proud of our accomplishments, it wasn’t easy.”

Parnett: “I can’t wait to take on the Blouman Empire and try to win another Di Bradini Cup. It would be a remarkable achievement.”

McAllister: “Getting the early goal and sensing that our opponent was more interested in going back home, we did a get a tad sloppy late in the first half and I was no exception. But after regrouping at halftime, we had a great second half. We have to continue to play well as the knockouts begin, though.”

The Albrecht Herald Online>Sport>Football>Latest News
Di Bradini caps hosts’ display to send Small Blues crashing out

The C&M under-21 side has failed to make it out of the Di Bradini Cup’s group stage for the first time in their history, despite a valiant effort quashed only by a late goal from the hosting Starblaydi outfit.

Hopes for this particular group of young players had not been especially high, amid concerns over Jerry Huntick’s age and preferred style, and a lack of top-flight experience among much of the squad. The ultimate talent of the likes of Jamie González, Jason Federici, Ryan Edwards and Niv Cohen shone through in the opener against kenavt and third matchday game against Lovisa, but it soon became clear that the side’s offensive offerings would be let down by their failings at the back. After an extremely even, joyous encounter with the Macabee side; C&M defence was pulled apart by the young Jeru FC attack, in an encounter that will have Candelariasian football fans wondering just what is it with the under-21s and Jewish opponents. The 3-2 defeat was the only the third occasion in which the Small Blues have lost a ninety-minute match, following the Justantina Cup final loss to Jeruselem and a dead rubber group stage defeat to Milchama, two DBCs back.

This time, the world’s greatest (young) army team had too much for poor Stefan Santamaria and his defence. There can be no doubt that this team will go on to form the bulk of future senior Jeru FC outfits – and probably sooner than later after their elders’ embarrassing 6-1 defeat to C&M in the recent Cup of Harmony’s third-place play-off. The teenagers could easily have gained revenge by the same scoreline, were it not for a fine display by captain Agamemnon Knight who shrugged off his early mistake that let in Flatt Tarmack for the opener to produce a string of decisive clearances.

You don’t get too many international Cohens outside the colours of Jeruselem and Milchama, but the MN Smith winger very nearly saved C&M’s bacon, twice keeping the Candelariasians in the contest with sweeping crosses tucked in by Federici and Guillermo Ibarra. Federici too impressed, getting into good positions and tirelessly running around up front without finding the back of the net again. The Port of Clotaire man alone deserves a DBC-winner’s medal: it’s a travesty that he won’t be earning one.

Cohen and Ibarra meanwhile may be the only members of this squad involved in the sixth championship, and both deserve another shot at the title. They ran the show in the final group game; the long-awaited clash with Starblaydia. Neither the senior nor junior Candelariasian teams have ever beaten the Purple Perils over ninety minutes, and the game had been portrayed beforehand as a chance for the C&M side to gain revenge for the WC39 defeat in Longview. The practical statistics now mattered rather more; for only victory would send C&M, and even that would rely on results from elsewhere. With Starblaydia their direct competition to qualify, the stage was set for a terrific contest – but, for once, the real world got in the way of international football. The usually sizeable section of Candelariasian bodies at this tournament – even in a game against the hosts – was noticeably thinner as thousands of fans tried desperately to contact friends and family back home as news of the evening’s events in Albrecht and beyond began to filter through to Atlantian Oceania. The crowd that remained seemed understandably lacklustre, and despite their best efforts could barely managed so much as a cheer when González equalised Jaime Kuu’s opener. The C&M players celebrated, for they had been kept cosseted from the incidents occurring back home – and for at least two very good reasons.

But let us stay with the sport itself, though C&M were on the back foot for most of the game from then on out. An impressive display in goal from Will Poole however heralded a counter-attack that ended with González laying on Gary Mills to poke in what very nearly proved the winner. Few could argue that Starblaydia’s eventual equaliser on the eighty-fifth minute wasn’t entirely deserved, coming after a sustained spell of pressure. Diamontii Di Bradini was set up by captain Wen Tze-shu, and the youngster, rather fittingly, put her side through to the knock-out stages once again.

Starblaydia’s ascension was made possible only by the Macabees’ failure to beat Jeruselem. The Empire now finish third, ahead of C&M on goal difference but a poor return for a striking debut performance. One suspects that both the Jeruselemites and Starblaydis will struggle to overcome the competition favourites from the Han and reigning champions Newmanistan.

And as for C&M? For a weak generation, we can feel pleased enough with their efforts. The next competition should bring a stronger squad, fewer disruptions and, most importantly… we’ll be bringing the girls!

What is glory?
The achievements of a team...

What constitutes the acquisition of glory? When can one boast of his accomplishments and claim to have gained glory, honor and respect? Is it a characteristic that only the winners can achieve? The fallen soldiers at the First Battle of Mons Dei, the dead of Weigar and the slaughtered of Aurillac beg to differ. When Hannibal's army stepped onto the plains of Zama, near the gilded city of Carthage, history had proven that Fortune herself was on the general's side. In an unfortunate turn of events, Hannibal's Numidian cavalry defected to the Roman side in a dispicable show of cowardice, and yet Hannibal's army fought. They fought and they lost. Like true soldiers, men and citizens they fought until they could fight no longer. That is glory. The trait that gives men the heart to fight against superior odds, to not fear death or defeat and to fight until they can go home without their shield, or on it. Glory cannot be attributed to the German Werhmacht which seized Poland that fateful September 3rd morning, it is given to the defenders of Poland who put the sovereignty of their beloved nation over the safety of their lives. Those who stood in the face of overwhelming fire power. Those that did not surrender, turn or run. Glory is what separates men from boys.

It can be said that the Imperials achieved glory on the fields of Starblaydia, gracefully losing their first match, but not letting themselves budge thereafter. The eleven boys that first stepped onto the field to play their match against Starblaydia itself entered as just that, boys, and they left as men. Despite their loss, they managed to score one goal - one goal that symbolized that no matter the experience of their opponent, nor the attitude of their fans, that the Empire put everything it had into the game, regardless of the odds. This metamorphasis remained throughout the group stage of the Di Bradini Cup. The Imperials came, saw and conquered^1 the hearts of their fans and the fans of other teams when they managed a three to three draw against the Candelarian U-21 national team - nothing less than the group favorite. The Empire's own then went on to take two flags, that of Kenavt and that of Lovisa, and ended their international debut with a startling draw against the group's undisputed leader, Jeruselem. The Imperials were the only team to not lose to Jeruselem, and this is a testament to the team's willingness to drill and put their heart, soul and body into the game.

Our team might have not entered the finals, but they have completed their stated objectives. Many asked who we were at the beginning of the tournament. Now they know. We came and held our own, starting as the group's last place team and ending as the third, before the group's favorite, and only one point under the second team in the group - Starblaydia. Finally, we thwarted Jeruselem's perfect streak and showed that we could put up a fight against even the giants. We made the best teams struggle to defeat us and we made the worst teams cry like women, for the victory they could not achieve as men.^2 We have guaranteed that in the next tournament we will come in similar force, with greater hopes for victory, because we and all else know our capabilities.

We have given hope to those that didn't believe. The Imperials mesmerized millions upon millions of people who did not even know who Mika D'Angíel was before this tournament. We have brought an Empire that came out of a war of succession and into a period of gloomy reconstruction back into her golden years. Our game has achieved something thought impossible - friendship between a Macabee and a Stevidian. Soldiers hundreds of thousands of kilometers away from Starblaydia, fighting in Theohuanacu, paused to watch the game against Jeruselem - for ninety minutes Theohuanacu was once again at peace (putting the post-game slaughter aside, of course). Fedala, capital of one of the largest and most powerful empires in the world, has once again become one of the largest tourist attractions of Greater Dienstad. Despite our ultimate lack of points to continue on to the next round, we have made sure that all know that during the World Cup we will give it our all. We will train harder, play better and learn faster. We are not machines. We are not supermen. But, we have tenacity. We have ambition. We have lust. We have the traits that make us the closest thing to the immortals. We have what made Herakles the man he became.

What will happen now? Mika D'Angíel, sixteen, has already been offered a four hundred thousand ríokmert contract to play in the national team for the 40th World Cup, while rumors persist that Luí Gaspor will also be asked to play in the national team. Werst Bry, the player who made a fool of himself, will most likely lose his contract with the Fedalan team he plays in and will have to find a career with a less well-known team willing to sacrifice team spirit for a better striker. Apart from the World Cup, both Luí Gaspor and Mika D'Angíel are lucrative players to receive international contracts. With the suspension of the national league due to the War of Golden Succession, it's likely that neither will sign contracts with local teams, and will instead opt for international teams that are looking for two young, powerful and smart strikers. If not now, their performance during the World Cup may give them the chance to make much money in the international football league. Luí Gaspor, eighteen, and Mika will most likely play in the next tournament, as well, hoping to provide the same level of success that they have in this 5th Tournament. Other players will most likely find better local contracts and will continue to train for the upcoming tournament - if there is one - in hopes of scoring success for larger contracts of their own; but this is all stipulation.

What is important is that next time we will come with respect. We will be on the red carpet, so to speak. We are no longer 'that team', we are The Macabee U-21 National Football Team.

Notes:
1. Julius Caesar.
2. Boababdil's wife upon his escape from Granada, when Spain completed the reconquista in 1492.

BROMHAM OBSERVER
National paper, Mercian values.

REPORTAGE

Protests Pass Peacefully

PRO-Krytenian protests across the nation ended peacefully last night, as those opposed to the current regime exercised their rights to free speech. Six arrests were made in Ousevale, however, after a scuffle broke out between protesters and local youths.

Felix Tristan, head of the "Free Krytenia" movement, called the protests "a success", and claimed that "the people of Krytenia have had their say, and will not fade conveniently into the background."

More protests are planned for next week, in Tyfield, Aigburth, Adanac, and Diorville.


SPORT

Can You Guess The Score?

WEST Starblaydia reached the quarter-finals of the Di Bradini Cup last night – and, keeping to form, registered their fourth consecutive two-one victory as they defeated Nethertopia in a make-or-break match.

Casper Smith was again in the goals, netting his third of the tournament with a simple header on seventeen minutes, and though the Nethertopians bagged an equaliser shortly before the hour mark, Cameron Lillicrap scored the goal that ensured the three points for the Westerners six minutes from time.

Further joy arrived for the West Starblaydi side shortly after the full-time whistle blew, as news came through that Bloumany had been held in their game against XXXX; a result which means that the Westerners top Group D and will avoid defending champions Newmanistan in the last eight. Instead, they will face an Elves Security Forces side representing the Valanoran nation.

THE ROCKET REPORT

ON TO THE KNOCKOUTS

Starblaydia- After clinching Group C with a perfect 5-0-0 record, the Rockets efforts to defend their title now increase in importance. One loss now, and it’s all over. Eight teams remain, and the first one that Newmanistan will draw is a club that is deceptively strong. The Blouman Empire (and yes, we have made sure that it is safe to actually refer to their junior team by that name) won three times and drew twice en route to finishing 2nd in Group D behind West Starblaydia. By the way if you’ve been living under a rock, or just like to tune out world news and go right to the sports, that is the country formerly known as Krytenia. Our Clint Peterson sat down with coach Brian Carson to discuss the matchup, among other things.

CP: Ok, once again I am here with the manager of the Rockets, Brian Carson. Brian, thanks for joining us.

BC: Always a pleasure, Clint.

CP: Let’s start first with your thoughts on the win over Bazalonia. Overall, I’m sure you are happy with the result.

BC: Absolutely, Clint. Anytime you win by four goals, you’re going to be happy. We did a terrific job, and if not for some missed opportunities early on we could have won by a larger margin.

CP: A fan wrote to me and wanted to get your opinion on this. A team like Bazalonia, who has a great senior side, loses every game they play here. Milchama gets beat up, for the second cup in a row. Do you think nations like that should be concerned for the future their senior sides when their young players are being beaten up like this?

BC: That’s a good observation, but what nations like Bazalonia and Milchama do well is develop their talent. It might just be a case that their players just don’t hit their stride and develop as quickly as other nations, but ultimately, they will get there. I don’t really think they should be concerned. You can see great young players, but keeping them great is the key. Or making good players become great players, and that’s what those nations do. They’ll be fine.

CP: Other fans want to compare the last cup team to this team. Which is better?

BC: Unless we win the Di Bradini Cup, even debating that is pointless. The last cup team is better. I will only ever compare the teams if we won the Cup again.

CP: How do you feel about your chances of retaining the Cup?

BC: I feel that we are capable. I feel that the personnel on this team can get the job done. But there are seven other teams also still standing that can win it too, so hopefully we’ll be up to the challenge.

CP: What team scares you the most?

BC: The Blouman Empire. Because they are our next opponent. If we beat them, then whoever we play next will be that team.

CP: I should have known better then to ask you that.

BC: Yes, you should!

CP: Newmanistan’s senior team got very physical with the Blouman Empire in the Oxen Cup, and it really seemed to rattle them, leading their media to call Newmanistan’s style of play “barbaric”. Will we see a physical game here, perhaps in retaliation if anything else?

BC: When I watched that game between the senior teams, I thought the Corrimal Rangers team could use more toughness. Perhaps from guys like Cooper and Pollard from this junior team of theirs. But that’s the drawback of bringing a club team to the international level. The Blouman Empire that we will see in the Di Bradini Cup is much tougher.

CP: So does retaliation concern you?

BC: Not greatly. I don’t think these kids of theirs are going to risk throwing away their chances of winning the Di Bradini Cup by giving into the grudges over their senior team. But if they do, we have people who will make them pay the price.

CP: What’s the status of Alex Warrick? Is he going to be reinstated from his team imposed suspension soon?

BC: We’ve considered bringing Alex back, but the fact is Matt Caufield and Brian Rafferty have made the most of the opportunity that arose for themselves, and right now I am not going to take Matt out of the lineup, or drop Rafferty down to being a reserve.

CP: Has Alex, at least, improved his mindset.

BC: I think he has gotten the message, yes.

CP: Alright Brian, thank you for your time, and we wish you the best against the Blouman Empire.

BC: Thanks Clint! Thanks to all the fans for their continued support.

Predictions

Well, it's that time again! TIme to see who goes on and who goes home. It's the Quarterfinals in Starblaydia as the DBC5 goes on. Coach Yu has fielded the best Han team to date, matching Newmanistan in this tournaments' achievements. Having dispatched all of the participants in Group B, we're set on for a cataclysmic clash against Starblaydia, a team that has seen more than enough of the Han team in the past two editions in the Group Stages. Now the two will face in the Quarterfinals, with the victor taking on the winner of the Jeruselem-Gwaine match. Starblaydia has had a little difficulty in this cup, falling out to Jeruselem and then drawing Candelaria And Marquez (you will not believe how many times I've had to type those words during this tournament!). But they're still a prominent force, coming out from a tough group. In contrast, the Han had an easy group, and took full advantage of the opportunity. It would still be a disappointment to see the Han fall out in this stage, and Coach Yu has stated that nothing less than the final match would be acceptable at this stage.

So let's get on to predictions.

Jeruselem has had a phenomenal tournament so far, and despite their last minute draw against the Macabees, they're in top form, ready to bash any opponent. We've seen Gwaine, and it's not likely to end favorably for them. Newmanistan and Blouman Empire go head to head for the 3rd Quarterfinal match, and it couldn't be tougher for Newmanistan. Literally. If they manage to dispatch (which our predictors comfortably say 'yes'), they'll have to deal with the winner between Western Starblaydia and Valanora, both impressive and strong teams. For the moment, Valanora has our suitors' favorite, but Western Starblaydia can be a surprise (no dark horse, because they're a good strong force that only fell out to some bad luck to an equally impressive Blouman Empire side). It's all going to be interesting, no matter how you take it.


QTR
Jeruselem 3-1 Gwaine
Daehanjeiguk 2-1 Starblaydia
Newmanistan 4-2 Blouman Empire
Valanora 3-2 West Starblaydia

SFL
Jeruselem 1-1 Daehanjeiguk (aet 1-2)
Newmanistan 2-1 Valanora

3/4
Valanora 3-1 Jeruselem

FINAL
Daehanjeiguk 1-0 Newmanistan


Talking about humility and pride in the same breath...

Hwang: *yawns* There's nothing on.

Shim: You're watching the security tapes. There's never nothing on.

Shin: That just made no sense. You must be getting more dumber than I had thought.

Wang: Would you please quit the grammatical fallacies?

Hwang: But grammar is fun!

Wang: Not when it's wrong.

Hwang: I! Love? Grammer@#

Wang: You're not making any sense anymore.

Shin: Wrong! It's 'you're not making no sense no more.' You see?

Wang: No, I don't see. What is there to see?

Hwang: I% Heart#< GRAMMOR^>!

Wang: He's incoherent now! I liked him better when he talked common speech.

Hwang: But don't you like having fun with weird particles?

Wang: I like understanding what people have to say.

SUPER: Quiet everyone!

*cricket chirps*

SUPER: That goes for you too, lucky crickets!

Hwang: What's the problem?

SUPER: Someone ate my lunch.

*gasps*

SUPER: I know. It's a tragedy, but I'm here to let you know that the person who ate my lunch forgot to take my anti-diarrhea pill to prevent the inevitable spillage that accompanies my lunch. So I hope that you rot in hell with intense abdominal rumblings and uncomfortable bowels. If confess to the crime, I'll let you have the pill.

*cricket chirps*

SUPER: No one's fessing? Okay.

*cricket chirps*

SUPER: Okay, well carry on. *leaves*

Shim: That was weird.

Hwang: I'll say. I don't want to ever eat the supervisor's lunch anymore.

Wang: You ate it?

Hwang: Not me. Did you?

Wang: I don't eat other peoples' lunches.

Shim: Oh, really?

Wang: We were sharing our lunch!

Shim: Yeah, and you conveniently forgot yours?

Wang: I made you dinner!

Hwang: Will you make me dinner?

Shin: And me?

Shim: I swear, you must feed on Hwang's stupidity.

Hwang: And you must feed on Wang's bossy and uncool attitude.

Shim: At Wang is mature.

Shin: More mature, Shim. More mature.

Shim: More is better than not.

*cricket chirps*

Hwang: Did that cricket just burp?

Wang: Ummm...

*cricket poops*

Shin: Did that cricket just poop?

Wang: It... did.

*cricket poops some more*

Hwang: The cricket ate the supervisor's lunch!

Wang: This place just gets weirder all of the time. And here I thought that our primary duty was to ignore n00bish attacks on our country. In fact, there's the almighty time-warp code-named "IGNORE" blast button that hasn't been pressed a great time! And next to it, the automatic space-time rift disruptor that separates n00bish countries from our reality. But instead of that %$#^, we're stuck with a cricket that has a serious diarrhea problem.

Shim: Um, yep. That about sums our lives.

Wang: And just exactly how much food did that little cricket eat?

*cricket poops more and more*

Hwang: The poop is bigger than the cricket!

Shim: I have a bad feeling about this...

*** THREE HOURS LATER ***

SUPER: Well, I haven't gotten any news from the Office of Paranormal Activities in recent days. They must be getting along just fine. Must be the right thing to do, bringing in those girls. They've set everything straight! But I still haven't figured out who ate my lunch... *tries to enter the Control Box* Hmm, that's odd. The door is jammed shut. And it smells like $hit. Hmm, someone must have eaten my lunch. *hits access panel* OPEN THIS %$#^ DOOR!

*door opens, unleashing a tidal wave of liquid cricket poop*

SUPER: GAH!

Shin: Freedom!

Shim: Free air!

Hwang: Light!

Wang: *passed out*

*cricket chirps*

SUPER: I knew that one of you ate my lunch! Which one of you was it!

*cricket chirps*

Hwang: It was the cricket!

SUPER: No, it was you!

Shin: Hwang is telling the truth!

SUPER: You must have helped him!

Shim: They're all telling the truth. The cricket had this weird pooping episode that just wouldn't stop.

SUPER: I say all of you did it and just trying to blame the cricket! You should be assumed of yourselves.

Hwang: It was Wang! Why else is he passed out?

SUPER: Hmm.... that is possible. Well, then Wang should be ashamed of himself, but he's passed out right now. I guess I'll talk to him later. Somebody please clean up this mess!

Shim: And just exactly how are you and Wang still friends?

Hwang: Mostly because we're stuck in the same room for 24 hours a day.

Wang: *wakes* What happened? Where's all of the poop?

Shin: You have to clean it up.

Wang: What did I do to deserve all of this pain?

SUPER: You ate my lunch!

Wang: What? It was the cricket!

SUPER: Don't try that trick. I can see beyond the lies.

Wang: But it was the cricket! See, the cricket is still pooping!

SUPER: Crickets poop all of the time.

Wang: %$#^, I don't care. I'm not cleaning up this gunk, because I'm sick and tired of people not believing me.

SUPER: I never asked you to clean up the mess. I've gotten the janitors to do that.

Wang: Wait, we have janitors?

SUPER: Well, I've hired them. Say hello to our new janitor - Kim!

Hwang: Ummm... that's a goat.

SUPER: I know. Kim is our new janitor, but we shouldn't be so prejudiced against Kim because she's a goat.

Shin: Perhaps we need to repeat. It's a goat. How can a goat clean our facility?

Kim: I can talk, you know.

Wang: Wow, a talking goat. I'm going to go shoot myself.

Shim: Can I join you?

SUPER: I didn't hire you to talk, I hired you to clean! Now, start cleaning.

Kim: You should have hired my sister. She likes to clean and does no talking.

SUPER: Oh, well sorry. You all look alike anyway!

Kim: Well, that's prejudice if I've ever heard of it.

SUPER: Just get to work.

Wang: %$#^, the cricket poop ruined the pistol.

Kim: *eats the pistol*

Wang: What the %$#^?

Kim: *chewing* Sorry, I was hungry.

Wang: Now how do we save ourselves?

Shim: We could press the button?

*cricket poops*

Wang: Pressing the button sounds nice.

Hwang: *yelling within* Too late, I already did.

Wang: Then, that must explain why I'm seeing two talking goats.

Kim: Oh, that's my sister.

Kim: Hi.

Wang: You all look alike; how do we tell you apart.

Kim: My sister almost never talks, so it's mostly just me talking. Sometimes, I talk for her.

Wang: *to Hwang* I thought you pressed the button.

Hwang: *yells* I did! I hate to say, but I think our pooping cricket friend took a trip to Candelaria And Marquez...

Valandil had made it to the Starblaydia match and came away very impressed by the side that the hosts had put together. However, he was quite dissapointed to learn that quite a few of the players were already under contract with clubs. Yet he knew that with the amount of funds availble to the Rockers, and surely the other Premiership sides who had scouts there, they would likely grab a player or two. Something troubled him though, while Valanora had just won the World Cup, he was worried that the domestic league was getting too many foriegners in the league. More than that, it was foriegners who were starting over domestic players that troubled him the most. Already the top players in the Commonwealth played in a foriegn league, for one reason or another.

Yet none of it really matters so long as the players are performing for the national team, the fans are happy, and a quality product is put on display. It doesn't matter for the under twenty-one side who is about to go up against West Starblaydia in the Quarterfinals. Those players are just playing for pride and country, and maybe a chance at getting signed later on. But what do they care if the domestic league is made up a tenth by foriegners? What do they care that the best overall player from Valanora left the Priemership for the Cafundeu league? All that matters for them is winning the next game and proving their desire to continually get better.

So Valandil, content with his scouting of the Starblaydia talent, decided he would go ahead and go see what Newmanistan was all about from a nuetral perceptive. Sure he had seen them before when they edged out the Marauders in the first match of the group stage, but that was as an evulater of the Marauders, not the Rockets. Their matchup would prove a good oppurtunity to get a true feel for how good the present and future talent out of the country would be, and if they were good enough to make the trip the ESF. Afterall, in order to be the best, you always have to be a step ahead of the curb.

(Rockets players gather in hotel meeting room)

Carson: Guys, I want you to read this. Check out the highlighted part, this is from a transcript of a recent XEL Sports show, from the Blouman Empire: Edward: Oh disappointing indeed Bill I thought they were in with a chance there, of courser the referee didn't help much what with Newmanistan's barbaric style of play.

Brooker: Barbaric?

McAllister: Us, never!

Parnett: That’s some bullshit right there!

Carson: It’s in reference to our senior team, but if they pick on our senior team, they are also picking on us.

McAllister: That’s right, a shot against Newmanistan is a shot against all of us.

Team: That’s right!

Brooker: I hear they took some exception to some good ol’ fashioned tackling.

Secrist: Yeah, I got it. Take the tackling out of football. Nobody can touch anybody. I’d say that were a bunch of sissies, but they would be an insult to the Vilardi twins, because they are much tougher then that too.

J Vilardi: Damn right!

McAllister: You don’t like a physical sport, play golf.

Drummond: Plus the article reeks of whining. “Oh the referee didn’t helps us!” Help comes to those who help themselves.

Brooker: I watched that game, Prescott pushed them around all game and they didn’t do anything about it. Wanting the referees to help them, and we’re barbaric.

Carson: Be aware though guys and gals, they have some more physical people on their junior team, so I don’t think they’ll be quite a pushover when it comes to playing the body. They’ll have some people to fight back.

Drummond: Let em fight back. I’ve seen those guys on the game tape, Cooper and Polland, and I can take them.

McAllister: Yeah, they’re alright, but we saw tougher defenders from Valanora and Fujisawan Territories.

Brooker: Do you think they’ll take runs at us?

Secrist: They might try, but we should be able to use our speed.

Drummond: Get them out of their game, sure. No one calls us barbaric though. No one.

McAllister: Let’s go out and there, blow them away, show them what we are made of us, and then see what kind of crap they come up with after the game. Rockets on three, 1-2....

Team: ROCKETS!

--------

Afterwards, Alex Warrick pleas to be reinstated from his team-imposed suspension.

Warrick: Coach, can I talk to you? I would like to get back in the lineup.

Carson: Sure, I would love to put you back in the lineup, but right now, I feel that Matt Caufield has earned his starting position.

Warrick: How come Shawn Drummond never gets punished for being with so many women, but yet I get suspended for it. Isn't that kind of playing favorites.

Carson: Shawn was never late to practice, Alex. I've always told the players, as long as your not breaking any laws, you're free to do whatever you want as long as you in game shape for practice and the game. You were not. I gave you two chances before the suspension.

Warrick: Yeah, but...

Carson: You're not being punished for being with the women. You're being punished for being significantly late to two practices, and then missing another.

Warrick: I've been to all the practices since then, come on coach, let me back in the starting lineup.

Carson: You've done well, and I do think you have learned your lesson. But the bottom line is, Matt Caufield made the most of the opportunity that arose for himself, and I do not feel the need to take him out of the lineup. It's kind of a residual effect of your actions. I'm sorry Alex.

(Warrick grumbles something and leaves)

Coach:
OK team. I've got some news for you! I won't be your coach after this cup. Not because I've done badly but army have made decision. The current Jeru FC are getting too old and very insuring them is getting very expensive too as they have this bad habit of sleeping with strange women like ... Dazza Dallas. We all know our Princess Jacinta Dallas is actually a mistake created by a former Jeru FC player. I'm sure there's more Jeru FC kids out there like Jacinta. Enough of that, but after this ... you are the new Jeru FC. Most of you seem a lot better behaved and better disciplined except for maybe the Captain Sadie here who always seems to get into trouble. But she's a Dallas, so she's excused. OK, team that's the big news. For now, we are Jeruselem not Jeru FC. We're going beat this Gwaine team first. Any questions?

Sadie: Who's going to be our new coach?
Coach: Oh, that horrible Alfredo Neves fellow.
Sadie: That meanie ... I've heard things about him.
Coach: Yes, same man. But he's nearly put the old team into the World Cup so he's a good man to push you kids hard.

Sadie: Do we get pay rise if we win this cup?
Coach: Err, no idea. I don't give out pay rises Sadie.
Sadie: Can we have different team strips, I don't like the Jeru FC one. It's daggy.
Coach: You'll have to wear what we give you as an Jeru FC player. It's that or go naked ... in your case, not a good idea. We'd be pushing pornography.

Sadie: Err, what about numbers! Can we pick?
Coach: I suppose you want the number 13.
Sadie: Yeah!
Coach: Well, I think they'll let you. The only reason is because you have powerful relatives like the Princess.

Sadie: Cool!

THE EMPIRE TIMES

EAGLETS ENTER SECOND ROUND
Empire draw with Agroprom

Last night in front of a decent crowd the Eaglets managed to maintain their unloseable streak with a draw against Agroprom. The draw meant that the Empire finished 2nd on the table one point short of group leader West Starblaydia who managed to beat Nethertopia 2-1. This means that Manager Jack Copper has now been successful at taking the Empire through to the quarter finals both times the empire has contested for the Di Bradini Cup. Last Cup the eaglets lost out to the Fujisawan Territories this time the Empire takes on title defenders Newmanistan, who will be eager to make it two in a row.

The game was a battle from the start with the Empire finding themselves on the back foot, after Agroprom scored the first goal five minutes into the game leaving all team members surprised. The game turned into a midfield battle as Agroprom went on the defensive in an attempt to maintain the lead. The Eaglets managed to have eight shots on goal, with Issac Golding missing on a perfect opportunity as he knocked the ball under the Agroprom keeper hands, however, it kinked the goal post and went out. Edward Bean who had started the game in favour of Shane Taylor had poor form after 3 shots on goal were completely off target and with only a 49% passing rate. The first half ended with Agroprom up 1-0.

The second half continued much as the first with the Empire having much of the ball but failed to capitalize on it. While Speed and Golding were shooting the ball at the goal from all directions, the Agroprom keeper had lightning quick reflexes and was able to stop all shots. Copper made two changes in the 75th minute with Taylor replacing lacklustre Bean and Kane Nomad replacing Ross Millsop who had complained of a niggling ankle. Copper later said it was to ensure that he would be 100% fit and ready for the quarter final. The changes had an immediate effect with Nomad crossing the ball onto the penalty spot which allowed Taylor to head the ball into the goal in the 77th minute. The game continued with the Empire making strong charges into their attacking third, they failed to make use of these chances and finished the game 1-1. The draw continues the good form of the Eaglets still yet to lose a game this cup and the teams record of never being beaten in any group round of the Di-Bradini Cup.

The team next play defending champions Newmainstan, who won all five games during the group stage and will be the toughest challenge for the Eaglets next. Captain Alex Burner said after the match "This will be a tough team for us, Newmanistan is a good team, and plays tough, but I know that we can give a good show out there and we will be pushing ourselves to the extreme to ensure a win". If the Eagles are able to beat Newmainstan they will play either Valanora or West Starblaydia for a chance to play in the final.

<Football Classified> (A popular weekly TV show that covers all things football)

<Hosts are Garry Bradshaw, John Samman and Shane Brownmore>

GB: Welcome back to Football Classified live from Starblaydia, we will now turn our attention to the Di-Bradini Cup which our U21 International team is currently competing in. Lets do a review of the games so far. The Eaglets started off well notching up a 3-0 win against West Starblaydia

SB: Actually Gary, an interesting bit of trivia they were still know as Krytenia at that point and we were the last to play against the team known as Krytenia.

GB: Yes good point, anyway the Eaglets had a bit of a scare in the second game against Nethertopia managing to get a third goal to break the tie in the dying moments of the game, with Issac Golding getting that goal. The third game they were up against Yafor 2 with the Empire lucky to get a 2-2 draw after being 2 goals down 47 minutes in. Christopher Speed showed why people consider him to be the next Bon Rerassi with a marvellous goal, and midfielder James Sleep helped the Empire to clinch the points again in the final moments of the game with a goal from him. We then saw Aesop who managed to break his leg during practice and was sent home unable to finish with the rest of the team. But the Eaglets bounced back from that with a resounding 2-0 win over United Heztel. The team then drew their final game couple of nights ago against Agroprom. They finished second on the ladder only a point behind West Starblaydia. I think that is a decent effort by the team.

SB: Too right Gary it is a very good effort, and I think it should be made know to people that we are the only team in our group who didn't lose a game and we scored the highest amount of goals in our group, despite finishing second, which really was just a bit of bad luck for the team. Now the real challenge starts playing against 4th Di-Bradini Cup champions Newmanistan, who won all five of their group stage games scoring 18 and only allowing in 6, so it will be tough to get the ball past Corey Hennis

GB: Yes and the defence a going to have to step up their game, they only let in 6 themselves, but a couple of times it should have been more. We will soon have Manager Jack Copper in the studio with us but before that John here has found out one or two interesting tidbits, John.

JS: Yes Gary, first up there has been a massive increase in the amount of fans coming into Starblaydia over the past few games and according to my sources 20,000 Bloumans have come to Starblaydia and for those lucky enough to get seats to watch the game will be cheering them on strong. In fact I got in contact with the ringleader of the new fan club called "The Nest" and he has said they have some new songs to spur the Eaglets. Not only do they have songs but they have a pipes and drums section that will accompany the cheers from the fans. Those who won't able to get tickets have set up base at pubs near the stadium, and I had a drink with a couple of them today and I asked them why did they come knowing they didn't have tickets and you know what they said? You know what they said?

GB: No we don't John, tell us

JS: They came here for the atmosphere and the energy surrounding our U21 team, they are here to watch some good international football, and regardless of the final result they have said the experience is good and Starblaydia is a wonderful country for visitors and they have enjoyed every minute of following the team around.

GB: Well that is good to hear, Bloumans getting out of the country following their team absorbing other peoples culture and all in all having some good clean fun. After the break we speak to the Eaglets U21 manager Jack Copper, and he will tell us of what we can expect from the team.

<The show cuts to the following ad break>

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XOVoK0fp8GA&feature=related

<The show comes back focusing on Gary>

GB: Welcome back and with us now is Jack Copper. Welcome back to the show Jack and once again you have taken the team through the group stage of the Di-Bradini Cup without a loss. You have got to be pretty happy about that?

JC: Yes it is a thrill to work with these boys, never a loss and when we have been down as we all saw with that game against Yarfor 2 they came back to ensure that we could walk away with some points under our belt. I am proud of these fellas and I hope we can continue.

SB: Well, what do you think your chances are of winning this game, they are the defending Champions and won every game in their group?

JC: Oh look there is no doubt that it will be hard Newmanistan is a very good team and we have to go into this game expecting a tough battle, where we must fight hard for every possession every tackle and every goal. I know the boys can do this they will push hard and give as good as they get.

GB: So you are expecting a rough game then?

JC: Of course this is a death match we can not afford to lose and think we can make it up later it is now or never, and I want to win, the boys want to win and I think every true Blouman wants to win.

JS: I mentioned that the boys had a few new songs have you heard any of them yet?

JC: Yes I have and I think that most of them are very clever, but there are one or two maybe they shouldn't do to much, but the good thing about our fans they get stuck into it and they get caught up in the game. I think that is important for any team to have a strong loyal fan base that will follow you no matter where you go and how well you perform. As for those questionable songs one of the guys said if Newmanistan has a thin skin then the diplomats can work that out.

JS: haha yeah, that is why I enjoyed playing so much, the fans and no matter what I did they still supported me and it certainly helped us find that extra boost during a game when we needed it.

GB: Edward Bean didn't perform that well when you were playing Agroprom, are you starting him again?

JC: No I am not I started him to see how he would go and he isn't on the top of his game at the moment and we sat down and discussed it. He will start on the bench and I will be putting in Shane Taylor, who has performed consistently well throughout this tournament, and I am confident that he will be finding the back of the net a couple of times.

GB: Well good luck with the quarter final, We hope you go well and show Newmanistan exactly what the Blouman Empire is all about.

JC: It has been a pleasure being here

GB: After the break we tell you how and why these two men have kissed and made up.

<A bar in Starblaydia>

<There is a large group of Blouman Empire fans, who have drunk enough to sing songs at the top of their voice, but still sober enough not to be stumbling around>

Fan#1: Are we going to beat those Newmaistan bastards

Crowd: Yeah

Fan#2: <Stands on his chair> Let us sing the new team songs together

<The crowd begins to sing>

Glory Glory Blouman Empire (Sung to the tune 'Glory, Glory Hallelujah')
Glory Glory Blouman Empire
Glory Glory Blouman Empire
Glory Glory Blouman Empire
We will keep marching on

If you know your history
Oh it's a grand old team to play for,
Oh it's a grand old team to see,
And if, you know, your history,
It's enough to make your heart go wee
We don't care what the Rocket fans say,
What, the fuck do we care,
For we only know, that there's gonna be a show,
When the famous Blouman Empire is there

We're Eaglets Supporters!
We're Eaglets supporters,
Loyal through and through,
Over and over,
We will follow you

In The Newmanistan Slums
In the Newmanistan slums,
They knock on the door when they want something to eat,
They find a dead rat and they think it's a treat.

In the Newmanistan slums,
Your Mum's on the beat and your Dad's in the nick,
You can't find a job 'coz you're too fucking thick.

Build a Bonfire (to the tune of 'Oh My Darling Clementine')
Build a bonfire, build a bonfire
Put the Stans on the top.
Put their Country in the middle
And burn the fucking lot.

He's Only A Poor Little Stan
He's only a poor little Stan,
His face is all tattered and torn,
He made me feel sick,
So I hit him with a brick,
And now he don't sing anymore.

Shawn Drummond chant
He's fat,
He's bent,
He arse is up for rent
Shawn Drummond Shawn Drummond

Oh Bloumany Is Wonderful (sang to the tune of When The Saints Go Marching In)
Oh Bloumany, (Oh Bloumany),
Is wonderful, (Is wonderful),
Oh Bloumany is wonderful,
It's full of beer, chicks, and Bloumans,
Oh Bloumany is wonderful.

We all live... (sang to the tune of Yellow Submarine)
In a town where I was born
Lived a man who sailed the seas
And he told me of his pride
Of a famous football team
So we trailed to Starblaydia,
Singing songs of victory
And there we found the holy ground,
Of our hero Chris Speedy
Oh We all live for the Blouman Emprie
The Blouman Empire
The Blouman Empire
Yes we all live for the Blouman Empire
The Blouman Empire

<The supporters all cheer eagerly anticipating the coming game against "The Rockets">

THE ROCKET REPORT

A MESSAGE TO OUR FANS

By Kevin Collins

Pocono City, Newmanistan- So I’m here in my office waiting for the Di Bradini matchup between the Rockets and some team that blows. The only similarity between Newmanistan and the opponent is that they are both Empires. I wouldn’t advise you to ever take a trip to the Blouman Empire, seeing how muggings and theft are a common occurrence. A recent World Assembly report lists their West Pacific Empire as having a serious crime problem. This isn’t really a major surprise after their actions in the Oxen Cup when a group of their fans attacked a referee because they were sore losers. Whining is a Blouman tradition after all, because there was not just that incident, but after the Rockets showed them that football is a physical sport at the senior level, the Bloumans did two things. First, yet again, they whined about the officiating. Then in a strange event, they mailed us here at the Rocket Report claiming that we should not be calling them by their club team name, the Crybaby Rangers. That’s alright, we tried to stick to that. Apparently, they aren’t proud to represent their Empire. And I don’t blame them, really.

At first glance, you might say that this has nothing to do with the Di Bradini Cup. Two different competitions, two different groups of players. But a budding rivalry is brewing between the Empires, as evidenced by recent events. We would advise the Starblaydi officials to step up their security at the match, and want to request all of our great fans to not stoop to their level. They may try to provoke you, but they are not worth it. Be respectful of the homeland of the late great Simeone Di Bradini, and let their security take care of the Blouman hooligans. I’ve been on NewTube recently and have seen and heard a collection of videos and songs in which they will be singing in full voice at the game. Some of them are actually somewhat amusing, particularly one about slums in Newmanistan, which is actually pretty surprising seeing how slums here are in better shape then most of the Blowmen Empire. It might make you want to take them on, and we’re pretty sure that we could take them, but instead focus on the action on the pitch, because there, the Rockets will be doing all the knocking around of the Blowmens that count.

So again, do not stoop to their level. Be respectful of the neutral pitch. Starblaydia has been an outstanding host for our teams for several years now, and to a point, we get the support of their neutral fans when not involved in a game against their host team. Let's show them that we will not be affected by the petty taunts. It's about football and Di Bradini Cup glory. That's the way Simeone Di Bradini would want to see you acting in the stands.

Let's go Rockets!

QUARTER-FINALS
Jeruselem 3-0 Gwaine
Daehanjeiguk 3-1 Starblaydia
Newmanistan 2-0 Blouman Empire
West Starblaydia 1-3 Elves Security Forces

Semi-Final Matches
Jeruselem Vs Daehanjeiguk
Newmanistan Vs Elves Security Forces

THE ROCKET REPORT

BLOUMANS DEFEATED; VALANORA RE-MATCH SET

Starblaydia- First of all, congratulations to you, the fans. Congratulations for not being goaded into anything by the Blouman Empire fans and their taunts and disrepectful chants. Reports from stadium security were that not a single Newmanistanian fan was arrested at the game (or afterward), which given the potential that there was for such violence, is something to pat yourselves on the back over. On the pitch, Corey Hennis and company made sure that the “barbarians” would advance to the semifinals for a second match against Valanora.

From the opening minutes, The Blouman Empire sought to assert themselves as a tougher squad then their senior club team, but the plan hit a snag in the 10th minute. With the Rockets on the attack, Andrew Pollard went for a hard tackle on Jeremy McAllister just as J-Mac had entered the penalty area, sending the Rockets striker to the ground. Our official quickly displayed a yellow card to Pollard and that set their home fans off, but in addition to the card, he also awarded McAllister a penalty kick. This is not the man you want to be conceding penalty kicks too, and the Eaglets would soon find out why as J-Mac blasted a shot in the top right corner, past Alex Burner, who guessed the wrong way. An early 1-nil lead was just what the Rockets needed in order to try and dictate the tempo of the game, but the Eaglets would not let up. From approximately the 20th to the 40th minute, the Blouman Empire was in command of possession, and were able to get some quality shots on Corey Hennis. But Hennis, much like he was in the 4th Di Bradini Cup final, proved he can be a big game keeper and stopped everything that the Eaglets were able to get on net. Christopher Speed had, in particular, two brilliant opportunities during this stretch. In the 35th minute, the official may have made some amends by issuing a yellow card to Steve Secrist for a rough tackle Issac Golding. The Rockets picked up some momentum in the last few minutes of th opening half, and in this time, Blouman’s other physical defender, Johnathon Cooper also earned himself a yellow card for a tackle on Shawn Drummond, which triggered the Blouman fans to start a derogatory chant aimed at Shawn. Drummond noticed and had fun with it, lifting his shirt and showing off his abs, something that just about every female fan in attendance not from the Blouman Empire had to have listed as one of their highlights of the match.

At the break, Brian Carson was a little more relaxed then maybe was to be expected given that the Rockets only had a one-nil lead. He felt good that the team would get more opportunities to score, and that the Eaglets seem to have been thrown off their game that got them a second place finish in Group D by trying to be much more physical in this contest. With two defenders having yellow cars, they would probably have to tone it down.

The second half started with some back and forth play as both teams tried to assert control of possession, but neither really able to do it any more then the other. This was just fine in the eyes of Newmanistan as more time was ticking off the clock. The Eaglets fans were starting to get frustrated, and you started to hear less and less of the taunts directed toward our fans. In the 62nd minute, the Eaglets had their best opportunity of the match when Christopher Speed set up Aesop. Aesop had done a terrific job getting by the defense of Tony Borsinger, but once he got the ball, he could not finish, instead he hit the post. Jeremy Brooker promptly got to the rebound and cleared away the danger. Not to long after, in the 67th minute, the Rockets delivered the biggest punch of the night. The play began innocently enough, but when Alex Parnett dribbled around Johnathon Milken, suddenly the Rockets had a great opportunity, with both McAllister and Drummond in a good scoring position. Parnett noticed them, and also was aware that the keeper also had them pretty well noticed, so he went in on net himself, causing Burner to have to second guess what exactly was going to happen here, and respect the fact that Parnett may very take the shot himself. When Alex noticed the slightest hesitation, he delivered a pass to Jeremy McAllister who took the shot. Burner made an outstanding acrobatic save on the shot, but the rebound went right to Shawn Drummond who at that point, had a simple tap in for the goal with Burner out of position. Up 2-nil with just a little over 20 minutes left to play the Rockets played hard nosed defense and did not want to give the Eaglets any sort of comeback hopes. When the Blouman Empire had some chances around the 75 minute mark, Corey Hennis was there. Late in the match, some Eaglet players tried to take out their frustration at the Rockets, and Ross Millsop would receive a yellow card in the 83rd minute, and so would Newmanistan’s Dale Stevens for some pushes they exchanged. Eventually, the final whistled sounded, and the Rockets had gotten the victory. The Blouman fans may have had the most creative chants during the match, but the Rockets enjoyed the sweetest of them all, a simple, “Bye Bye Blouman!” as the stoppage time minutes ticked off.

So the win is in the books, and Newmanistan will set their sights on Valanora, who they played on th first matchday. It’s an interesting similarity to the Di Bradini 4 run where Newmanistan met Sorthern Northland in the semifinal after having beaten them on the first matchday of group play as well. Let’s hope that history will repeat itself, and the Rockets will be off to the final. Here is some post game reaction:

Carson: “Yeah, I noticed that the Eaglets tried to be a little more physical in this match then they were against their group foes, but that’s exactly what we expected and we were well prepared for it. If anything, maybe their plan backfired on them. I’m really happy with the team right now, we played a great match today. We needed to be strong and we were. But we were also smart, and that’s how we were able to win.”

Brooker: “A clean sheet well earned today. That Speed guy, he’s pretty good and can be tough to defend, but we limited a lot of his passing lanes and contained him pretty well. We were a little fortunate that the one guy hit the post, but that’s the way the game goes.”

Hennis: “My defenders did a great job in front of me once again. I can’t tell you how much fun it is to play behind those guys. On most of their shots, I saw the ball as it left their foot pretty well. I just felt like I was in the zone today, there was no way this team was going to beat us. We just didn’t like them.”

Parnett: “They definitely tried to be physical, but we were too and were smarter about it. We did it in the right spots, and didn’t give up any penalty kicks like they did, especially so early in the match. I’m excited about playing Valanora and think that we are in great form right now.”

McAllister: “We did a great job today, and so did our fans by not responding to some of the silly chants that their fans were saying. It was a good game, and in fairness to that Pollard guy, if he didn’t make the tackle that he did, I’m going to have a great scoring opportunity anyway and may have scored regardless. I think a couple of these players deserve to be on their senior team. But as for us, it’s a big win, and now we get ready to play Valanora. We have all the respect in the world for them, and know how much they would love to win a Di Bradini Cup right after having won a World Cup, so we must be prepared for what we will face. However, I think that we will be.”

Hwang: They were wrong!

Wang: Who was wrong?

Hwang: MBC! They said that we would win!

Wang: Um... we did win.

Hwang: 3-1!!! We won 3-1!!!

Wang: Is that bad?

Hwang: I was betting that we would win 2-1!!! 2-1!!!

Wang: I clearly have no opinion about this. Quite honestly, MBC did a good job picking all of the winners. Who cares about the scores?

Hwang: The scores are everything! Everything!

Wang: Calm down. Say, where are the girls?

Hwang: Oh, they went shopping for shoes.

Wang: Wait. They went shopping. Outside?

Hwang: Yeah, the supervisor gave them permission.

Wang: Outside? While I'm stuck here with you? Why didn't I know about this? I would have gone!

Hwang: Well, the new protocol states that at minimum two people must be present at the Control Box to operate the machine properly.

Wang: Oh, so pitiable is my life!

Hwang: Don't worry. There's that semifinal match against Jeruselem! I've bet that we'll win in extra time 2-1!.

Wang: According to this, it says that they're now Jeru FC.

Hwang: What the %$#^? How am I supposed to win now?

Wang: But... we beat Jeru FC last time.

Hwang: I know, but the bet was a win against Jeruselem! Damn countries, changing their names every six hours! I lost that one bet when Krytenia changed its name to West Starblaydia! What the %$#^ is wrong with this world?

Wang: I'd love to know too. Write me when you figure it out.

SUPER: Gentlemen, we've got a crisis!

Wang: What's wrong now?

SUPER: The Imperial Office of Paranormal Activities is under threat of a budget cut, and we need to create a distraction to continue propping the Office.

Wang: The same office that investigates us after each incident? Why should we help them?

SUPER: Because... the Office explains everything! If they're gone... we'll have to explain everything. We need a distraction, quick!

Hwang: Wait... you want us to press the button?

SUPER: What is up with all of these italicized remarks? Just do it, dammit!

Hwang: Okay. *presses* button - toilet flushes* Oops. Wrong one.

Wang: First "wrong" one in a long time, I suppose.

Hwang: Hey, I can't read the words on these things. It must be French, or something like that.

Wang: And here we are, trying to use it.

Hwang: Let's try this one. *presses button - alarms buzz* Hmm, I suppose that's why I put the skull and crossbones by that one.

SUPER: What was that?

Hwang: Oh, that's our new security system. The test button.

Wang: Okay. Let me try it. *presses button - a frying pan lands on his head*

Hwang: My frying pan! I was looking for it all over the place!

SUPER: Why do you have a frying pan?

Hwang: To fry my eggs.

SUPER: On what stove?

Hwang: Sometimes, when Wang gets angry, his head gets really hot, so I fry them on his head.

Wang: *groans* Ugh... that was painful. What about this one? *presses button - an inflatable balloon falls on him* At least it wasn't so painful.

Hwang: Winkie!

SUPER: What?

Hwang: It's my pet, Winkie!

Wang: You've got problems...

Hwang: Where were you, Winkie? I was looking all over for you!

Wang: While he's playing with buttons... *presses button - balloon suddenly pops* Oh...

Hwang: Winkie!

Wang: I guess that's the... pin needle button.

Hwang: *chokes Wang* You killed Winkie!

Wang: *gargles* Mumf... puff... buffum... *presses button - alarms buzz*

SUPER: The one time we need a distraction and you can't do it? Well, this is lovely!

Shin & Shim: We're back!

SUPER: Stop with the italicized remarks already!

Shin: What the %$#^ is that?

Wang: That was Winkie.

Shim: What is Winkie?

Hwang: Winkie was my friend, you murderers!

SUPER: Hwang, it's about time you took a break. Here! Go out and ride a pony.

Hwang: Winkie was my best friend, and there's nothing that will ever change that! *sobs*

Shin: He looks sooo cute when he cries.

Shim: But he sounds like an idiot.

Wang: He looks and sounds like an idiot. Yet, I'm friends with him, so guess who's the idiot?

SUPER: Wang and Hwang. Both of you take a break and get out of here.

Wang: But...

SUPER: No buts! Shin and Shim will figure out which button to press that will get us the distraction.

Shin: How about this one? *presses button - another inflatable balloon appears*

Hwang: Winkie!

Shim: Well, that solves one problem. Let's try the skull and crossbones. *presses button - alarms buzz* What sort of button is that?

Wang: The emergency alarm test button.

SUPER: We need a doctor.

Hwang: Winkie!!! I'll never let you die! NEVER! *hugs balloon until it pops* Winkie!

Shin: You'd imagine that the balloon would be stronger than that.

Shim: Quick press that button before he starts whining again.

Wang: At least, I can say that I didn't do it...

Shin: Here goes... *presses button*

*** Somewhere in Nethertopia ***

*a pooping cricket suddenly appears*

*** Back at Control Box ***

Shim: That doesn't help us at all. What sort of alternate reality is this?

Shin: I don't know. Why don't we just use the touch screen?

Wang: You have to press the button to activate the touch screen.

Hwang: WINKIE! *sobs*

Shin: Sooo cute...

Shim: Sooo dumb...

Wang: Sooo lame...

SUPER: JUST FIX IT!

Wang: Here, let me try one more time... *presses button*

Coach: Great game Sadie.
Sadie: Thanks coach, our defense stood firm!
Coach: You'll need to do it against the Han.
Sadie: Don't worry, I'm working hard. At least I think I am.

Coach: At least we don't have the old Jeru FC defense.
Sadie: Oh, the one which is like Swiss cheese.
Coach: More like glass.
Sadie: Can't see it and when you hit it, it breaks.

Coach: Err, yes. That's old the Jeru FC defense.
Sadie: So what about us?
Coach: You lot seem a bit more consistent although the goal scoring could improve a bit more.
Sadie: I'm a defender ...

Coach: You stay in defense, you can't score goals even they gave you one for free.
Sadie: Am I that bad?
Coach: Leave the scoring to Kara Kools and Kate Sallads of this world.
Sadie: Yeah, I wish they were in this team.

Coach: But they won't play for us ... we don't pay enough. Girls like that need lots of money.
Sadie: I don't have a lot of money ...
Coach: Because you joined the army, you dill.
Sadie: I'm just doing what my Mum did. The other girls weren't interested.

Coach: Look, just be a good defender like Fiskin Dallas.
Sadie: OK
Coach: I've met a lot of Dallas girls but you're not as smart as the rest of them. Yes, they look stupid but I know they aren't. You look stupid and well, seem stupid.
Sadie: Really?

Coach: OK, not Hikfie Dallas stupid ... I don't know.
Sadie: Mum said she got sick from chemicals working in the stores.
Coach: Err, which stores?
Sadie: The ones in the airbase. The ones which don't apparently exist.

Coach: Oh ... that's old biowarfare stockpiles! No wonder you have brain damage!
Sadie: Really, one of the containers leaked and nearly killed Mum.
Coach: Oh god, poor you. No wonder you're stupid.
Sadie: My brother isn't very smart either!

Coach: What's your IQ?
Sadie: Err, let's see ... 90!
Coach: It should be 100, Sadie.
Sadie: Oh ...

Coach: Your mother had an IQ of 140.
Sadie: So ...
Coach: Don't worry, just play football like an idiot like Hikfie does.
Sadie: Yes coach.

Coach: Well, at least you look good anyway.
Sadie: Thanks!
Coach: Some men like dumb girls like you. Those men can't cope with really intense girls like Kate or Dazza.
Sadie: Say, is Jacinta Dallas dumb? I'm kinda like her.

Coach: No, she's just really girly. She once pulled apart a Wii and put it together again, working.
Sadie: Really?
Coach: My kids complained the Wii wasn't working, so Jacinta pulled it to bits and fixed it.
Sadie: Screwdrivers scare me!

Coach: No wonder you're just a secretary.

Wang: So the Turks won?

Hwang: Actually, they're pretender Monggols. I've never seen Monggols like that before.

Wang: They're pretending to be Monggols? How do Turks pretend to be Monggols?

Hwang: I don't know. Ask them.

Shim: Actually, they're not pretending. They're claiming to be Monggols. Those darned English people confused the two words from the French.

SUPER: Speaking of French, I've managed to find us a person who speaks French.

Shin: Yes! Finally we can understand what these keys say!

SUPER: Only problem is that he only speaks French. Understands what we say though, somehow.

Shim: What's the point then? He's just as useless as this key panel.

SUPER: Not to worry, I've brought a translator book.

Frenchie: This computer looks old.

SUPER: Erm... *flips through a book*

Shim: This is going to take forever.

Frenchie: These aren't French. They're Russian!

SUPER: Slow down! I'm still looking for "set". Oh! It's... apparently... "this"!

Shim: "This" what? I don't have time for this.

Wang: Umm. We have a vocal translator on this computer.

SUPER: Genius, Wang! Bring the computer over here!

Wang: Well, it's one of these keys that operates it.

SUPER: That's no good! Bad genius! Think of something else while I try to figure out "odinoty".

Hwang: Let me look! *presses a button - Frenchie disappears as the entire country of France sinks into the sea* Oops.

Wang: That's genius.

SUPER: Well, now we'll never figure out what this machine says. Well, at least we'll have something for the Office of Paranormal Activities.

Hwang: Actually, you won't because according to this timeline, France disappeared 2000 years ago.

Shin: If Frenchie disappeared, then why aren't these keys different?

Shim: They must not be French!

*everyone groans*

Wang: Well, the only key we know is the security system emergency alarm test button, and all that does is set off the alarm.

SUPER: I'll find a linguist. They'll know what to do.

Shim: Could you get us some fried squid while you're at it?

SUPER: What do I look like, your butler?

Shim: At this point, I don't care.

Valandil's Diary

After another trip to the Purple Paradise, I find myself both optimistic and somewhat concerned. The lack of leadership that Roki displays is very discouraging, and I plan on confronting the veteran tutor about it tommorow. It is painstakingly obvious that the man has no tactical or motivational gifts to speak of, and how in the world he was given the job in the first place is disturbing. As a result, I will be filing an official report on the behalf of the Premiership on the recent activities of the Valanora Sports Commitee. What happens from there, only Elune knows, but for my part, I will be able to rest a little easier knowing that I am doing my part to ensure the future of this country's sporting enviroment.

Yet not all news is bad or dark. I was able to do my duty for the Zeratul on my trip here, and have come away quite impressed. I've sent him my evaluations for every team I was able to watch, and it seems he was quite impressed with a Cafundeu defender. Word has it that a small fee and player exchange is in the works and that the Rockers are just working out the personal contract details for it to become official. In a way, I feel quite proud by this transfer, knowing that it was my report and work that enabled the squad to improve itself. It also furthers my belief that everyone that lives has an effect on the world in some shape or form. Be it me doing scouting for a football club, a nurse who tends the ill effects of children at school, or the grounds crew who makes sure that the park is clean and tidy, we all do something that shapes our world. It gives me a real sense of livelyhood and purpose, to which I can live my life with my chin held high and a peaceful mind.

Lastly, I was able to get to make a nice nuetral observation of the Marauders match, and I have found a whole new level of respect for these players. As mentioned earlier in this entry, they have no leadership from the manager apart from whom he says is starting. In his absence, the young Soler girl has shown maturity beyond her years in organizing the squad and pulling them together to get the results that they have needed. While she has a decent supporting cast, it is her that is the catalyst that gets everything going for this squad. If they are somehow able to upend Newmanistan in their rematch, I have no doubt that it will be in no small part due to the efforts of Calla. Much like the other half-elf to have passed through the U-21 program in Santapa, Calla shows all the same stregnths from both species, and uses them perfect to augment her natural ability. It is this ability that will allow her, and Santapa, a terrific future with the senior side, and hopefully be enough for the Marauders to slice through the Rockets. For once, I'll be going to a game in this tournament as a fan, and I do expect to be entertained by a great affair between two amazing set of players.

THE ROCKET REPORT

VALANORA READY FOR REVENGE - CAN ROCKETS COPE?

Starblaydia- The four teams remaining in the Di Bradini Cup all have their own unique stories. One half of the bracket has the semifinal of rivals and the other has the semifinal of champions. Jeruselem and Daehanjeiguk have built up a nice little competitive rivalry between their sides. Both nations have played extraordinarily well and are each a deserving finalist. It should be an exciting showdown, look for a passionate contest.

In the semifinal that we will be playing, you have the winners of World Cup 40 against the winner of Di Bradini Cup 4. While in theory, there is nothing in common between the World Cup and the Di Bradini Cup, don’t think for a second that Valanora wouldn’t love to win the championships so close together. While Valanora did not do much in the last Di Bradini Cup, they actually have a deep history in the event, and can proudly boast that they were the first ever nation to win the Cup after it was named after the late great Simeone Di Bradini. Two cups later, they were the runner up in Di Bradini Cup 3. They have had success in just about every competition they have entered, except maybe for the World Bowl, but we won’t go there. Their proud history over all sports makes this a nation that we as Newmanistanians, can truly look up to and try to emulate as we attempt to grow further on the interregional scene. For them to once again reach the final in an odd-numbered Di Bradini Cup, they must get past the Rockets. The Rockets history isn’t as deep, but it is successful with their championship in Di Bradini Cup 4. Newmanistan has had a successful journey thus far in this Cup, and they would love to be just the second team to ever repeat as champions in this event. This is just a semifinal, mind you, but you should expect all the passion of a final. Both teams are playing well, and right now, they are on a collision course.

When these two teams met in the first matchday, it was a classic. The Rockets defeated the Marauders that day by the score of 3-2, with Jennifer Vilardi breaking the deadlock with an 84th minute goal. Either team could have won that day, and you better believe that fact is being echoed over and over in both team’s locker rooms right now. At the time, it was an important match, but right now this is for everything. Expect a battle. It’s almost unfortunate that this could not be the final, and not to take anything away from Daehanjeiguk or Jeruselem, because they will both be a worthy finalist, but wouldn’t it have been something if the first Cup since Simeone Di Bradini’s passing could have been between the first and the last teams he ever saw win it when it was in his name? This will be fun, enjoy the game.

SEMI-FINALS
Jeruselem 1-2 Daehanjeiguk
Newmanistan 3-2 Elves Security Forces

Championship Match
Daehanjeiguk Vs Newmanistan

3rd Place Match
Jeruselem Vs Elves Security Forces

THE ROCKET REPORT

ON TO THE FINAL

Starblaydia- One more game. One more team standing in the way of the Rockets bid to win a second consecutive Di Bradini Cup. That game, against Daehanjeiguk, will be a true battle as each team has been perfect in all of their games played to this point. Newmanistan earned their place with a hard fought 3-2 win over the Marauders of Valanora, a game that lived up to its pre-game hype.

The stadium was jam packed and focusing on the match between the two teams. There were no silly derogatory chants shouted from one teams fans to the other. They were there to watch football, and to focus on supporting their nation as opposed to rooting against the other one. There was a bit of respect that existed between the supporters of each side, and it created an environment that everyone could enjoy. Soon enough, it was time for football, and the Marauders went right to the attack, determined to take the early lead. Newmanistan certainly remembered Valaria Love and Calla Soler. The two of them worked so brilliantly together in the first meeting, and they sought to set the tone, and in the 7th minute, they struck quickly. Soler took a pass where only she could get it, and as she had a half step on Jeremy Brooker, she took the shot immediately. Low, left, perfect. 1-nil Valanora. Newmanistan wasn’t rattled much by this goal, and you could see by their approach that they seemed pretty confident that they would get it back. No reason to make a silly mistake when there’s so much time left on the clock. The next stretch of time saw a lot of midfield play, with no team really having the upper hand. Then around the 35 minute mark, the Rockets seemed to have the better of the chances, and in the 40th minute, they would be rewarded with the equalizer. Alex Parnett, who has really come on in the last 3 or 4 games made the play happen in the midfield, first by soundly beating Ecante Redias for a header, and then outspring the Valanora midfielder, and dribbling around defender Stephias Deadleaf. When Danen Lika came over to help out Redias, Parnett saw a golden opportunity to get the ball to Jeremy McAllister. He did, and J-Mac found the back of the net. So we’re going to halftime, tied at 1, right? Well, not exactly. In the second minute of stoppage time, the Rockets took another charge to the goal. Parnett again in the midfield, taking advantage of a favorable speed mismatch between he and Ecante Redias. Parnett then delivered a cross to Jennifer Vilardi with pinpoint accuracy. Vilardi knew exactly what to do with it, retrieving and burying home the second goal of the game for the Rockets.

At intermission, Brian Carson was absolutely delighted with the way his team closed out the first half. He knows quite well that there’s nothing like a stoppage time goal in the first half, especially when it breaks a deadlock in a semifinal. He wanted the Rockets to cautiously attack to start the second half. Perhaps they could strike again quick, but defense still needed to be the focus.

Half number two begins with the Rockets fans plus neutral fans that may have been siding with Newmanistan in the match began to drown out the Valanora supporters. Newmanistan took to the attack, and in the 48th minute they had a great chance to make it a two loead only to be denied on an acrobatic stop by Julius Rewi. About four minutes later, the Rockets created another such opportunity, only to be turned aside by Rewi again. He was keeping his team in the game, and it was beginning to motivate his teammates. From about the 55th minute, the Marauders took control of the match, and in the 68th minute, finally, they broke through. Hennis made a couple nice stops himself, but brilliant ball control by Ceine Jurangil, dribbling past Tony Borsinger like he wasn’t even there gave the Marauders a favorable run on net. Sensing the opportunity, he let the shot go. Perfectly placed, to tie the game up at two. Now, the Valanora supporters were at full throat and drowning out the Newmanistan fans. As time ticked away, the game was looking so much like that first matchday contest between the teams. Once again, here we were, tied at two. Late in the game. Jennifer Vilardi was the hero that day. Would she have more magic today? In the 80th minute, Corey Hennis provided a bit of magic with a tremendous save off a tricky shot from Celebrian Ar-Feiniel. After successfully defending the ensuing corner, the Rockets then charged upfield and looked to capitalize. They were beginning to take control in the last few minutes. Then it came, in the 88th minute. Parnett starts the play with a great cross to Jeremy McAllister, but he was well contained. J-Mac looked for options before sliding the ball over to Jennifer Vilardi. She was well covered too. But with that extra double coverage, one man was left free. Sprinting hard down the left side there he was, Matt Caufield. Not even supposed to be in the starting lineup, but getting the opportunity due to the Alex Warrick suspension. Vilardi noticed Caufield and passed him the ball. Not the most common forward to make a run on goal, keeper Julius Rewi nervously didn’t know what to expect. Caufield took the shot. Top left. Rewi was a just a fraction of a second too late to react, and the ball sailed over his fingertips. Caufield scored! His first goal of the tournament, but what a great time to get it. After closing out the remaining minutes, Newmanistan celebrated the victory. Another great battle, but again, Newmanistan wins it. And again, by the score, of 3-2. Let us all catch our breath, and get some post game reactions.

Carson: “I am just so proud of my team, they never stop amazing me with how hard they work and how hard they play. Every second of this game was such a battle, with both teams playing at top form. In the end, to get a second victory over Valanora, it’s just amazing. We’ll savor it for a day, but we got one more game to go.”

Brooker: “They got some damn good forwards on that team. I guess that’s to be expected given the prestige of their nation, but I can assure you the future of football in Valanora is quite bright with these guys and ladies. Beating them is no small achievement.”

Hennis: “The game was pretty wide open, so both of us keepers had to be at our best. I know when there is five total goals in a game no one really is going to say the keepers did well, but I was happy with my game, and I think Rewi was also superb, despite the score.”

Caufield: “I saw how they were committing their defenders to J-Mac and Jenn, and being that one of their midfielders was caught upfield a little bit, I saw some room there for myself. The key in my head was just to hope that Jenn would notice me, and she did, and she noticed me in the perfect spot too. It’s nice to be a hero, but it won’t mean anything if we don’t beat the Han.”

McAllister: “We had a good focus in today’s match. We knew we were going to face a strong and a proud opponent, and certainly one that wanted a little bit of revenge after the first game that we played. Being able to get that goal at the end gave us such a bit of relief, and for Matt to be the one who got it is remarkable. One more game to go. The Han are good, but we fear no one right now.”


As the players alluded too, the next game for the Rockets will be against Daehanjeiguk. The Han were the only other team to go 5-0-0 in the group stage, and in group play the goals for and goals against of each side were virtually identical. Something has got to give, and it will all be decided in a clash between the two teams here in Starblaydia. Newmanistan defeated the Han in the last Cup in the quarterfinals, and the Han have brought back the same roster. It’ll be a showdown for sure. Don’t miss it!

With visions of their second consecutive Di Bradini Cup now getting larger, the Rockets stand only one win away from realizing that dream. Only one nation stands in their way. But Daehanjeiguk has stood in Newmanistan’s way before in the Di Bradini Cup, as they met in the quarterfinals of the last Cup. The Rockets defeated the Han that day, and sent them back home. This time, the Han survived their quarterfinal opponent, as well as Jeruselem in the semifinals. It was that win in the quarterfinals though, by the Han, which just may see the Rockets get the support of most of the neutral Starblaydi fans. It was the Han that ended Starblaydia’s dream at that stage. Our Clint Peterson sat down with Brian Carson to reflect a bit on past games, and then this coming one against Daehanjeiguk.

CP: Good afternoon, I’m joined once again by Brian Carson of the Rockets. Hello coach.

BC: Hello again, Clint.

CP: First, I’ve heard that the Empress is en route to Starblaydia for the match. Is that correct?

BC: Yes, the Empress likes Starblaydia, she enjoyed it here before. Due to other issues at home she couldn’t commit as much time to it right now and attend as many games, but she is not about to miss the final. She will be here.

CP: That’s great. Let’s do some backtracking. The Blouman Empire fans were a little, interesting, weren’t they?

BC: They were a little different, but if they thought they were bothering us, they really weren’t. We actually thought their chants were pretty funny from the sidelines. When you can do that, have fun with it, and everyone remains orderly, which we saw, it’s fun. The supporters on both sides were orderly, indeed.

CP: So you thought they were funny?

BC: Well yeah. Personally I am of the opinion that when you play on the road, or in this case a neutral site with a lot of the opponent’s fans in the stands, and they are spending more time ridiculing you then they are cheering for their team, then you’re already in their head, and are already ahead of them. I know they had several pro-Blouman chants too, but you get my point.

CP: Alright then. Then you guys get a big win against Valanora. Tell me about that.

BC: There’s never anything minor about beating that club. They have a deep history in nearly every tournament they have ever competed in. We played two fantastic games against them, and being able to win both of them, I think really speaks of the character of this team.

CP: How about Matt Caufield. What an unlikely hero.

BC: That’s how you win big games, Clint. Everyone knows who the opponent’s biggest threats are to score especially when you are deep into the tournament like we are now. Often times, it’s the little things like what we saw today with a game winning goal coming off the foot of an unexpected player.

CP: Gotta love it.

BC: Yeah you do. It’s not as if Matt doesn’t score goals. He does. But Valanora was respecting J-Mac and Drummond down low, and Jenn just outside of the penalty area a little too much, that Matt was really able to break free and get a great opportunity for himself. Jenn read the play well and got him the ball, it was pretty sweet.

CP: So only Daehanjeiguk stands in the way. The players will be playing in their third Di Bradini Cup, so they have some experience.

BC: They do. I guess starting them real super young at this level really paid dividends, right? (Laughs) Through time and experience, they’ve learned and grown to become fantastic football players, and they are better now as a team, then when we beat them in the quarters last time around.

CP: They have yet to lose. In fact, when you look at the statistics, your teams have a lot in common. Last time the final was between two major cinderella stories. This time, the two heavyweights emerged from the pack.

BC: That’s a pretty fair assessment. I don’t think anyone out there can say that neither of our teams deserve to be here.

CP: The Rockets seem very composed about everything. That seems to be a product of good coaching.

BC: It helps when you’ve returned several key players yourself. They can guide the younger players, and Jeremy McAllister has been a terrific captain. Our composure stems from just the fact that we know what needs to be done to win the Cup now. It doesn’t mean we’ll win it, because with the Han players in their third Cup now themselves, they obviously also know what it takes. I guess you can give me some credit for that, as I do have gotten very comfortable in coaching this team, but most of that has to go to the players.

CP: Well Brian, good luck. Let’s bring home another Cup.

BC: We’ll do our best. I can promise you that much.

Shin & Shim & Hwang & SUPER: GOOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO
...OOO......OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...
OOO...OOO...OOO...OOOAL!!!

Wang: *clears ears* Can't you people get a better job?

SUPER: Can't you have more affection for your country? We're going to Final Match! Champions for the first time since... since... since... since...

Hwang: Say, when was the last time we were the champions of anything?

Wang: Baptism of Fire?

Hwang: Right.

SUPER: Since the Baptism of Fire! Whoa, that was a long time ago.

Wang: I'll tell you what. When the Han win the World Cup, then I'll join your shenanigans. Otherwise, there's no point. The DBC is just another wild fantasy for people who don't have any time for anything else. Like work.

SUPER: About that. I've figured out that our Control Panels were contracted by the Russians.

Shim: Russians? As in Rush-us?

SUPER: No. Not that one. Russia.

Shin: Never heard of it.

Shim: Me neither.

Wang: Russia. Used to be our big northern border before some time ago. I haven't a clue who they are now.

Shim: Oh. Them? They sit around all day drinking alcohol and eating bread and having sex. How could they build something like this?

SUPER: I don't know. It has something to do with sobriety and 8 months of winter. Anyway, it's Russian. So I've got the linguist coming in on Monday.

Wang: Couldn't we get a Russian translator?

Hwang: Translation! I've got the dictionary!

SUPER: That's a French dictionary.

Hwang: But you can still translate, right?

SUPER: Let me translate this for you.

Shim: Oh my goodness! They scored again!

Shin & Shim & Hwang & SUPER: GOOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO
...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOO
...OOO...OOO...OOO...OOOAL!!!

Wang: *clears ears again* I'll be outside waiting. *leaves*

Shim: I had to get a guy who's not passionate about football.

Hwang: Oh, he's passionate when he's drunk.

Shim: And when is he drunk?

Hwang: Rarely. He doesn't like it. He gets embarrassed the next morning.

Shim: He's still boyish... ugh.

Hwang: Don't worry. Boys are cute to handle. They're squeamish about everything and then you have to teach them that it's alright to explore.

Shin: Are you alright, Hwang? Because sometimes I doubt that I've been sleeping with a guy.

SUPER: Trust me, ladies. Neither Wang nor Hwang have anything it takes to be a ladies' man. They lack brains, gall, or pressure. Not a real pleasure.

Shim: Young blood is better than old blood.

SUPER: Hey, I hired you!

Shim: Is that a threat, Supervisor? Because I do recall that it's against to use employment stickers as a reward for favors.

SUPER: And I got your stupid fried squid.

Shim: *chews a piece* You're right. But I could just as easily get Hwang or Wang to do it.

SUPER: HAH! They'll never leave this place alive!

Hwang: Um, beg to differ. Wang just left.

SUPER: Gah! MY ticket to salvation! *runs after Wang*

Shin: Is your Supervisor horny all of the time?

Hwang: He doesn't seem like it, but he's a real beast. I wondered why he didn't get three girls for himself. But oh well.

Shim: This is really bad conduct. I mean, I like a good time, but this is bordering on insanity. Who spend all of their time eating, drinking, and having sex? With nothing else to do?

Hwang: Hm. That's probably why they made this stuff in Russia.

Shin: Go figure. This place is falling apart without us. We should spend some time to fix it.

Shim: But we don't know how.

Shin: Hasn't stopped us before.

Hwang: Doesn't stop me.

Shim: But the difference is you break stuff; we're trying to fix it.

SUPER: *carring Wang on his back* I've got Wang now. So no more fried squid!

Shim: Did you whack him with a monkey wrench?

SUPER: No. *hides monkey wrench* At least, not intentionally. He ran into it!

Hwang: Ladies, if you don't know that was a lie, then you're all hopeless.

*cricket chirps*

Shim: Thanks for the tip, Hwang.

SUPER: I guess if you girls won't give me attention, I'll have to go find another brace for myself.

Shin: Ewww. All of that lard?

SUPER: I'm not fat! It's just a little... you know.

Shin: I wouldn't know.

Wang: *groans* Ung.... What happened? How'd I get back in here?

SUPER: *whacks Wang with the wrench* Go back to sleep!

Shim: Says he who ran into the wrench?

SUPER: He was asking for it!

Shin: I guess "What happened?" translates as "Please whack me!" somewhere in the Supervisor's head.

Hwang: The Supervisor has crabs.

Shin: *shrieks and jumps into Hwang's arms* EWWW!

Shim: *sighs* My guy is knocked out cold on the floor. I can't jump into his arms.

SUPER: How could you tell such a lie, Hwang? I don't have crabs!

Hwang: *to Shin* If you can't tell that that's a lie, you're toast.

Wang: *groans* Ung... My head hurts.

SUPER: *tries to whack Wang, but Shim takes the wrench and whacks him* Ouch! That hurt!

Shim: That hurt? *whacks even harder*

Wang: Why did you do that?

Shim: He's been whacking you on the head. I think the words you want to say are "Thank you".

Hwang: Oh! Wang has crabs too!

Shim: *shrieks and jumps onto Hwang's arms, now carrying both girls*

Wang: What's wrong with crabs?

Shin: They itch and bite! And they crawl all over you!

Wang: Hermit crabs? Maybe pinch, but not bite.

Shin & Shim: *slap Hwang* You said he had crabs!

Hwang: *drops girls to the ground* He does!

Shin: That was a mean lie. You know what we mean by crabs.

Hwang: I mean, don't you want to see his crabs?

Shin: Now that just sounds gross. I'm leaving.

Shim: Wait! I'm going too. Let's get some soju and fried squid. Leave these sick boys to their schemes.

Hwang: *rubs head* So what now?

Wang: *rubs head* I don't know. My head hurts. How about a nap?

Hwang: A nap sounds good. *falls asleep*

Wang: Good grief. Now who's going to talk to me?

Sadie: Coach, I need some money!
Coach: Don't ask me, I've got kids to feed.
Sadie: How many?
Coach: Four ... I'm a Mum just like ... well ... your relatives. What do you need the money for?

Sadie: Err, my brother wants this game ... I can't find in Jeruselem. I found one here.
Coach: Can't you ask one of your relatives?
Sadie: These people only take cash. And no one likes my military credit card here.
Coach: I noticed that with our credit cards. Err ... I don't have much cash, sorry.

Sadie: I'll have to go to a bank I guess.
Coach: Don't go by yourself, you need an escort.
Sadie: I can take care of myself, I think.
Coach: You're a Dallas, people could kidnap you for lots of money.

sadie: Aw, OK ...
Coach: Take one of the boys with you. I'm sure they won't say no.
Sadie: OK coach.
Coach: Don't be too long, and don't be late for training. We have to train to beat them Elves.

Sadie: No problems coach. You're pretty good with kids!
Coach: Well, one has to be being a Mum.
Sadie: Am I annoying? I ask lots of questions!
Coach: You're alright. Better asking questions than not.

Sadie: Say, how did you get into the army?
Coach: Oh, for the adventure and fun ... supposedly.
Sadie: Really?
Coach: I think they lied about the fun bit. Too late now, I can't get out now. I don't recommend your kids join the army.

They could go all the way...

And it's time for another commentary by MBC International. It's DBC fever as the Han stroll past Jeruselem in an exciting 2-1 win in the Semifinals, putting the Han on the edge of a championship for the first time since we started hosting the OFC. Coach Yu, the man largely responsible for this triumph, is with us one more time before the match, and let me say we're all very proud of you, sir.

Yu: Well, To be honest, I've said it before. Anything less than the championship will be unacceptable. We've gotten this far, and our boys are in top form. It's literally now or never for some the players.

MBC: Come to think of it, is it now or never for you? After this DBC tour, there are speculations that you'll join the National Team.

Yu: Me? Never. Ioshido is doing a fine job there. He managed to qualify and despite a hard group, came out in third position. It's hard doing the men's team, but the U21 team is pretty much all children. I've got more experience with the kids, so I'll be sticking with them. A number of the players are looking to make their move in the National Team, nonetheless, and I think that some of the young talent that we have here will be on that World Cup winning squad.

MBC: Well, that's knocked off about three of our questions. More about this final match. Newmanistan. A side that knocked us out of the Quarterfinals and went on to win the Cup.

Yu: There's no disgrace in that. They were a good side that season, and it's time for another season. They're still a good side, but we've got too much good talent to waste. It's going to be tough, but I think with the convict coach - by the way, his name is Yun - has built up the discipline in this team. It's discipline that's going to win this match.

MBC: Discipline. Are Newmanistan disciplined?

Yu: Of course they are. They wouldn't be here without it. No great team can build character without discipline. But it's going to be a great match-up and we're going to bank our chance to hold strong to our discipline and strength. That's the difference between the great teams and the greatest teams.

MBC: So you think a win is salvageable?

Yu: Salvageable? What kind of attitude it that?

MBC: Well, it's just that...

Yu: The Han have outdone every team in the tournament. The only team that even comes close to matching our commitment is Newmanistan. There's no reason to believe that we're not better than they are.

MBC: So a win, no doubt?

Yu: I've said it a thousand times! Anything less than a win is unacceptable!

MBC: So if we lose?

Yu: Well, it's unacceptable. Rewards and punishments are firm, resolute, and absolute. But you can't judge a team by losing the final match alone. It's bad to say that we were horrible simply because they lost one match out of eight. But consider it all - we have worked hard to come to this point. Why settle for a loss at the apex of the tournament? We should aim only for victory; nothing less will satisfy us.

MBC: Well, that's pretty resolute. What do you plan to do with the team if they win?

Yu: Well, we'll probably celebrate. No doubt we'll figure out a safe way to celebrate.

MBC: And if you lose?

Yu: It's back to the training grounds.

MBC: Now that's firm. What have you done about the scandals of the past years?

Yu: What do you mean?

MBC: There were reports that the U21 team were... engaged in pornography, drinking, and other stuff.

Yu: Who... who... who told you that?

MBC: Well, I just looked it up on the Internet...

Yu: That's unbecoming! My team? Looking at pornography?

MBC: They said you confiscated one of those videos...

Yu: I did what?

MBC: Well, apparently not so.

Yu: Who are these people? I'll file libel and get the mob out there.

MBC: Nevermind I said that. Let's get on to the next topic at hand. Baptism of Fire. It's finally come to the Han, and the first of the international teams have come to Seojang Province where the tournament is to be held. Do you think - first - that it was a bright idea to conscript the aid of the Buddhist monks and - second - that the tournament will be a great success?

Yu: I'm not really entitled to give my opinion on that.

MBC: Well, we're not going to tell anyone...

Yu: Just like the rumors?

MBC: Well, that was different. We'll be sure to edit that part out.

Yu: Well, if you're going off the record, I think that it was a dumb idea. Putting a bunch of kids and players at over 3000 m in elevtation is just stupid. They're all going to run out of breath before the match starts, and it's just going to be 22 tired kids running on some grass. Unless they're all pumped on steroids.

MBC: Steroids?

Yu: Well, some teams use steroids to give them an unreal advantage, but I'm pretty certain that the IFA will be actively screening players for drugs. I guess in the books of the IFA, drugs are bad, but bribes are not.

MBC: Interesting.

Yu: Not really. But I've tired to make the IFA be more responsible, instead of acting all proper about bribes. We shouldn't be bribing referees, even if it does win us games.

MBC: You mean...?

Yu: Well... I'm not allowed to say that on any record. Truth be told, I know that there's a lot of rampant bribing. I mean, it's how all of the rich teams win! I mean, with a few notable exceptions, how many socialist teams have you seen win the World Cup?

MBC: Have you been reading some of the MBC World Cup Inquiries? Because that guy was fired because he was smoking some weird drugs.

Yu: Reading what inquiries?

MBC: A blog.

Yu: I don't know.

MBC: So you mean that guy was right, and there's Bob and Margaret making scores?

Yu: You're just confusing me now. Is this all off the record?

MBC: It should be. I turned off the recorder... Umm........

*STATIC*

Moderator: Thank you for logging into to chat on your premier source for everything related to the Newmanistan’s football team on this very website. As we know, the Rockets are one win away from successfully defending their Di Bradini Cup championship. Only Daehanjeiguk stands in the way. We are honored to have striker Shawn Drummond with us. Thank you Shawn, for taking some time to do this.

Drummond: It’s my pleasure.

Moderator: Ok, ask Shawn what you like, but please keep it clean.

(Rocket_Power10): Hey Shawn! Like, great job so far dude! I know you can beat those Han people. They seem a little weird.

Drummond: Thank you. Morale is high in our locker room. As a team we feel like we can beat them, as we did beat the same group of people the last time we played. It’s much different now, and all of us have gotten better, on each side of the pitch. It will be a good game, but we are confident. I don’t know about that last part, they seem perfectly normal to me.

(PockCityDude): You have a great future. Any chance you can sign with Pocono City once your Springfield contract is done? I mean, you could play for coach Carson every day!

Drummond: Haha, well I will admit that I would probably like playing for Coach Carson on a club level, I am happy in Springfield and I will probably sign a new contract with them.

(We-will-rocket-you11): What’s the same and what’s different in this team and the team that won the last Di Bradini Cup?

Drummond: I’ll start with the different part first. The main difference is obviously we are not an underdog. We were a huge unheard of underdog before. Now as the defending champion, we got everyone’s respect it seems. What’s the same is the team camaraderie. We play so well as a group. We’re all afraid of failure, not because we personally don’t want to lose, but because we don’t want to let our teammates down.

(DiBradini_4_champs): So who do you think Simeone Di Bradini would want to see win? I’m thinking us since the Han eliminated Starblaydia.

Drummond: I don’t know. I think he would be proud of us, and would be proud of the Han just the same. He would be real glad to see how he’s remained in the thoughts of not just us, but all the fans of all the nations, and all the players of all nations.

(Wang_Hwang): How many girls have you banged while you’ve been here? Go Han! Go Han!

Moderator: Please, keep it clean. Shawn, you can ignore that one.

Drummond: Haha, well Wang_Hwang, that’s a bit personal, don’t you think? Feel free to support the Han has loud as you can though. It should be a good game, and everyone should be able to enjoy themselves no matter who they root for.

(Soccerchik15): He can bang me anytime. Hey Shawn! Wow like you are so awesome. How cool was it to shut those Blouman people up in those games with their stupid chant?

Drummond: Give me your email address, then. One of things I love the most in sports is shutting up fans of the other team by scoring on them and beating them. With them being as obnoxious as they were, it was sweet.

(GoRockets348392433): Back to football, what kind of game do you expect to see. Low scoring like the last final, or more wide open?

Drummond: Well last years final, despite the 1-0 scoreline in the end was a little more wide open then the score suggests, you just saw great goalkeeping on both ends. We’d love to get a clean sheet on them, for sure.

Moderator: Ok, that’s all the time we have for today. Thank you very much, Shawn.

Drummond: Thanks all for your support. Hopefully we can bring another cup back home!

(Players gather for a team discussion)

Carson: One more guys, one more.

McAllister: WE WANT THE CUP! WE WANT THE CUP! Come on everybody!

Team: WE WANT THE CUP! WE WANT THE CUP!!

Carson: I know two in a row has been done before, but what we could accomplish here today, would be something truly special nonetheless. I just want us all to take a moment to reflect and soak in everything that we’ve done as a team.

Secrist: It’s been a great ride. Just getting to the final two times in a row is good, but we don’t want to have the next sentence to be: oh yeah, and they were 1-1.

Brooker: The Han are good, but I don’t know, they just don’t really scare me.

McAllister: We’ve beaten this same group of people before, we can do it again. They’ve gotten better with age, but so are we. Look at us now, we can draw on our experiences from the last time we were here. We couldn’t do this before.

J Vilardi: It means a lot to me, guys. I wasn’t here when you guys won the Cup. I remember watching it on TV though, man, that was a great game.

Drummond: We want to do it for you, and the others here in this room who weren’t there before. And for ourselves, because let’s face it, for most of us, we won’t be back in the Di Bradini Cup because of our ages.

McAllister: That’s why I want this bad, Shawn. I want to win it for Newmanistan, and for all of you, and even though it might seem strange to say it, I want to win it for Simeone Di Bradini. I mean that because I felt my talk with him last time made me a new person. You’ve all made fun of me of how I used to do this, and how I used to that. But now, my life is all about football. There was aura about that man. I don’t know if he ever realized the connection that I thought we had.

Carson: I think somewhere, Jeremy, he’s up there watching us now. We can’t say for sure that he would want to see us beat the Han or not. Maybe we’d like to believe that since they took out Starblaydia. But on a personal level, and forgetting about teams and nations, I think he would be quite proud of how you’ve grown up. But everyone, it’s not just about Jeremy. We’ve all grown up. We all know what it takes.

Drummond: You’re right. Jeremy, I’m sorry about trying to bait you into things you used to do.

McAllister: That’s alright, man. This is our last Di Bradini Cup game together, win or lose. But there will more World Cups and stuff.

Parnett: This has been such a great experience for me. I want to do it for my country. I don’t have the chance to play for Newmanistan at the club level, so right here is what its all about.

Hennis: Guys, I just want to say something. I know I’ve been one of the quieter players on the team, but I want to thank all of you for your support. What makes us great is the way that we play together, as a team. Whenever I let in a bad goal, no one ever shouts at me, you all just go try and get it right back, and usually you do. When one person makes a mistake, someone else picks him up. No one complains with one another, no one argues with one another. That’s what makes us a great team.

McAllister: Amen to that Corey, I think we got to thank coach a lot for that.

Carson: I appreciate it Jeremy. But really you guys make my job pretty easy sometimes.

Parnett: Yeah Corey’s right, just look at the last game, who got the game winner. Matt Caufield. We have so many weapons here, and I think that showed too how we work so well as a group.

Brooker: The Han are hosting the Baptism of Fire this year. Let us let them prepare as a nation, by showing them what the reigning Baptism of Fire champion can do, and beat them, right here, right now!

McAllister: Damn right!

Drummond: Then Han are good. We know that, we’ve been watching tape of them. But I wouldn’t trade any one in this room right here for anyone on that team.

McAllister: Nor would I. This team right here, all of us, have something special going on. You can just sense it. If we just play as we have been, we can take Daehanjeiguk. Everyone, Rockets on three. 1.... 2....

Team: ROCKETS!!

CHAMPIONSHIP MATCH
Daehanjeiguk 2-1 Newmanistan

THIRD-PLACE PLAY-OFF
Jeruselem 3-0 Elves Security Forces

Congratulations, Daehanjeiguk! :headbang:

Will let you RP the match first as you see fit.

http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/Daehanjeiguk.png|Daehanjeiguk | 2 - 1 | Newmanistan|http://spaam.mrdrake.net/flags/Newmanistan.png

http://www.utkusa.com/images/korea/soccer.jpg


It was a dream come true - another trophy to add to the lonely BoF23 trophy. And it was a well-fought 90 minutes, clean as a whistle and emphatic as a kid's screech as his/her parent's take him/her to the ice cream parlor for that super-duper double triple banana split sundae. Yes, it was all of those things in one stadium, somewhere in Starblaydia. It was a big stadium, enough to house the many Han fans. Rumors of terrorism were kept low, as Starblaydian officials asserted their control of the situation - it was risk for as many Han citizens and ethnic Han to be present after yet another terrorist attack recently had left so many people dead in Candelaria and Marquez. Whether or not the attack was coordinated by the Mujeongbu remains unknown; but it was still a huge risk.

But as it happened, the event was without harm. The game began promptly, as the referee's whistle blew and the Han went out to storm the Newmanistan defense. For the first ten minutes, play was exclusively on their side. Attacks by Pak Gyuseon and Seol Gihyeon were pressing on the Newmanistan defense; the Han managed 3 shots, 2 on target. But it was a quick break that caught the Han defense by surprise, and Yi Jeongyeol was forced to make a desperate save that lobbed the ball over the goal. The ensuing corner saw Newmanistan steal the lead off a brilliant corner, headed in past Yi. in the 16th minute The match really opened up, with neither side really taking the advantage seriously. Newmanistan clearly had the better chances with their noses in front, but the Han wanted to show more attacking strength with one last minute shot that went clear over the post. At halftime, the two teams went in with Newmanistan set for a historic second trophy. Possession was 59% favoring Newmanistan, while they had made 6 shots, 4 on target, compared to the Han 4 shots, 2 on target.

But something happened. Some say it happened in the training room. Some say it happened on the walk to the pitch after the half. Some say it happened the moment Baek Namjun stole the ball away from the Newmanistan striker and lobbed it forward to Shin Hyeisong. Regardless, Shin found himself onside and with a wonderful opportunity - he seized it and the Han went up 1-1 after just one minute after halftime (46'). It was a tipping point for the Han, who realized that this game was still far from over and the attack went on the rampage. Newmanistan tried to assert their reach again, with two critical shots in the 63' and 67' minutes, but the Han were simply dominating the second half. It was such that the Han managed to overpass possession, finishing the match with 52% possession. Nonetheless, it was still all even, and it appeared that the match would run to extra time and perhaps penalty kicks. But it was a stoppage time shot by Seol Gihyeon that sent the crowd at the stadium in a roar. 2-1 favoring the Han, and just 2 minutes of stoppage time left; it wasn't a better time to strike, because the Newmanistan side managed one last minute draw, as a bad foul by defender Yi Suyeong gave the opposition a dangerously placed free kick. The kick went straight into the grateful hands of Yi Jeongyeol, who punted it out with the whistle blowing for full time.

Coach Yu was open for a few remarks after the match:

I'm very proud of the boys. I've been telling them that this was our year, and they satisfied all of my expectations. I have to give credit to Newmanistan, though. They really worked us hard. Yi Jeongyeol was critical n this match, as opposed to our previous ones, because it was difficult to stop their strikes. But our strikers also held out and made the Newmanistan defense pay for their mistakes. It was pity that the two undefeated teams in this tournament had to go head-to-head. In some way, we're both champions, but that's no consolation to the losing side who doesn't take away the trophy. But I'm also glad to say that no one starting singing any opera during the match at all.

And there it was, 2-1. A beautiful thing, wasn't it? We'll see you next year.

Hwang: So... the DBC is now over.

Wang: And we're champs now.

Shim: What else is on?

Shin: I've heard that there's a new drama about four weird people stuck in a room doing crazy stuff. It's supposedly very good.

Wang: A drama? They make a drama out of that?

Shim: They'd make a drama out of anything. Which channel is it?

Shin: Let me see.

SUPER: Great news! I've got our linguist!

Linguist: Hmmm, these are definitely Russian.

*cheers*

Linguist: Unfortunately, the wear on the keys are so horrible that half of the keys are plainly illegible. I'll try my best to get the keys deciphered. And just a matter of principle... why didn't you get Han keys instead of Russian keys?

SUPER: Budget problems. I don't know why, honestly, though.

Linguist. Okay. Say, you people look familiar.

Wang: Really? How so?

Linguist: I've seen you people on television before.

Hwang: Oh, that's impossible! None of us have been on telelvision.

Wang: *turns to Shin* You said four people?

Shin: Ummm...

Wang: *flips on TV, flips through channels, finally gets to drama, looking at himself look at the TV* OH MY %$#^! WE'RE ON TV?!?

Linguist: I told you. Say, I'm on TV too! Hi, mom!

Wang: Oh my %$#^! I was... I was... stupid on TV? I was drunk on TV? I was... naked on TV?

Hwang: Technically, I was the only person naked on TV.

Shim: I had sex on TV?

Shin: What kind of sick show is this?

*all look at SUPER*

SUPER: Hey... I signed you up because we needed the money. Who else would pay for it? TV companies are looking for good money, and they figured something like this would be good business.

Wang: *slaps SUPER* We're supposed to be secret!!!

SUPER: I know! But no one would figure that this was real. I mean, come on. A machine that controls alternate realities? This is Scifi stuff!

Linguist: Oh, so that's what this thing does? Hmm. I thought it was a trouble making machine.

Wang: You saw me? On TV? In my underwear?

Linguist: I saw her in just a brassiere. What does that mean?

Shim: *slaps Linguist* How dare you!

Shin: *slaps Linguist* How dare you!

Shim: I just said that.

Shin: I know, but I had to do it for myself.

Linguist: For girls, you slap pretty hard.

Shin & Shim: *yell* AYAYAYA! *beat up Linguist*

Hwang: Well, so goes the hope of figuring out what these buttons do.

Wang: So goes my hope to live a normal life after this.

SUPER: So goes that budget increase...

Hwang: So do you think that I'll make a great movie star?

SUPER: You? Not in your dreams. Wang, on the other hand, has potential.

Wang: Me? Never!

SUPER: Exactly. Potential. If he'd only accept the fact that everyone else is human too.

Wang: But I can't be human!

SUPER: Well, then you can't be a movie star.

Wang: I don't want to be a movie star. *to girls* And stop beating him up. His head is going to be ground to pulp if you continue doing that.

Shim: He insulted us!

Linguist: *coughs* It... was... a... compliment... *coughs*

Shin: Oh.

Wang: God. If you really exist, have someone pull out a gun and shoot me right now.

Shin: Sorry, God doesn't accept suicide notes. Please try again.

Hwang: OO! That was good!

Shin: Thanks! *start smooching*

Shim: She gets into a fuss about some guy looking at her with a bra on, and she falls for this guy while we're still on TV?

Wang: It's the Hwang syndrome. The more you hang around him, the more insane you become. I'm afraid in a few years, she'll be indistinguishable from Wang.

Shim: Well, let's get out of here and figure out how to beat up the Supervisor.

Wang: Way ahead of you. There's only one way out of here...

THE ROCKET REPORT

TWO IN A ROW? NOT QUITE

Starblaydia- It was a clash between two teams that seemed to cruise through all the early stages. Daehanjeiguk and Newmanistan would eventually leave all other contenders behind, and prepare for what seemed as if it would be another classic Di Bradini Cup final. It would be just that, but for the Rockets, they would not get the desired result.

With fans of both sides cheering on their respective nations, the game began. Both teams wanted to get off to a good start and assert themselves early, but in the opening minutes, it was the Han that was able to do it. Corey Hennis made a brilliant save in the 8th minute on Pak Gyuseon to prevent the Han from getting that all important first goal of the match. The Rockets, too, wanted to get the first strike, and on a full speed counter attack led by Alex Parnett, they made their move, seemingly catching the Han defenders off guard. Parnett got the ball in deep, and passed the ball back and forth with Jeremy McAllister, before J-Mac took the shot. Goalkeeper Yi Jeongyeol stretched out to make the save, but he could not control. On the corner kick, Parnett delivered a perfect ball, and McAllister was able to use his height advantage on a Han defender and beat Yi will a perfectly placed header in the 16th minute to give the Rockets the 1-nil lead. The game got really exciting at this point, with the Rockets wanting to go for the kill, and get a second goal quickly. They sensed the Han on their heels somewhat, but every time they got in real close, someone was making a big defensive play at the back end for Daehanjeiguk. Ju Sigyeong was especially impressive during this stretch. Late in the first half Newmanistan got a great opportunity when Jeremy McAllister found a wide open Jennifer Vilardi for a prime scoring chance. However, Jennifer smacked her 38th minute chance off the post. We went to the break with the Rockets holding a narrow 1-nil lead. 45 minutes away, from repeating as Di Bradini Cup champions if they could hold on.

Coach Brian Carson at the break was thrilled with the effort of his team. They withstood the early rush of the Han, and then seemed to take control of the game later in the half, as evidenced by their 59-41 possession advantage, an advantage that would have been even larger if not for the Han controlling the ball early in the half. More of the same he preached, and the mission would be complete with another championship.

It was a good mission, and a good plan. However, someone forgot to tell Baek Namjun. Immediately their #4, a number which in their tradition is also spelled the same way as the word “death” (ooc: I apologize if I got this wrong somewhat, I’m going off memory of posts I’ve seen from you in the discussion thread), provided anything but death, in fact, he provided life for the Han at the start of the second half. Brilliant defensive work by Namjun, and then setting up Shin Hyeiseong. The Rockets were caught upfield, and Hyeiseong had a great chance and beat Corey Hennis to tie up the game. This led to a non stop barrage of shots by the Han. Where they found this added gear, we just don’t know, but the Rockets were on their heels. On their heels, but not beaten. Corey Hennis was equal to each chance. Denying them, time after time, sending the Rockets faithful in emphatic chants of “Cor-ey! Cor-ey!” It was perhaps one of the greater displays of goalkeeping in the entire tournament. Hennis’ saves allowed the Rockets to find life midway through the half, with Jeremy McAllister digging deep and doing everything he could to make Corey’s saves mean something and put the Rockets back on top. But Yi Jeongyeol, seeing his adversary at the other end, gave a little “I can do that too” right back to Newmanistan. The game stood at 1-1, but if not for the goalkeepers, it very well could have been 4-4 at this point.

The ninety minutes were up, but we had three minutes of stoppage time to take care of, and in the first minute, came the dagger. Seol Gihyeon perfectly placed the ball into the top left corner as the Han went on a full speed attack, and took advantage of a slip by Steve Secrist. Hennis read the shot fine, but when a striker hits his shot perfectly into the top corner, there is no goalkeeper in the world that can keep it from going in. That is what Seol did on this play. It gave the Han a 2-1 lead. But the Rockets are about character. Heart, and determination. Many other teams would have had their hands on their hips, sulking, and realizing that their dreams had been crushed. Not Newmanistan. They went for it, and would make Jeongyeol have to come up big again. With Jeremy McAllister bearing in on him, and Shawn Drummond to his right, Yi Suyeong was in trouble, but he would turn into an unsung hero. His dive on McAllister just outside the penalty area was a foul, but a foul that had to be made. Some may have seen it as a bad foul due to when in the game it happened, but any defender will tell you that it is just one of those things you have to do. If not, McAllister, as he has done many times before, is finding Shawn Drummond and Drummond is having perhaps an uncontested shot on Jeongyeol. Since Suyeong got the ball away from McAllister, there was no advantage that could have been played. It was a free kick from just outside the penalty area. Instead of kicking into the wall, McAllister slid the ball over to Drummond and let him take the shot. Going top left. Jeongyeol read it, made the save and cleared it. Then the whistle blew. The Rockets hopes of winning the second consecutive Di Bradini Cup were over.

The Rockets players looked at each other in despair, but then shook hands with the Han players. This was a great match, the kind of match that we were hoping to see based on how good the teams looked in their previous matches. In time, the hurt of the defeat will heal, and the players will realize what they truly accomplished in this Cup. For the Han, from all of us here at the Rocket Report, we congratulate you. You are a very worth champion.

So ends the 5th version of the Di Bradini Cup. The Han will celebrate for days upon weeks, and it is something that will be with their players forever. The fans saw a great game that had a little bit of everything that would make every fan of this great sport enjoy it. The future of football was at its best today. And somewhere up above, Simeone Di Bradini is smiling about we what we witnessed on this great night.

Once upon an evening dreary, I was nervous, tense, but cheery,
Pondering over which numbers made up a certain score -
As I imagined, nearly napping, suddenly there came a tapping,
Like someone gently rapping - but not of hip-hop - past my door.
"'Tis some visitor," I muttered, "tapping at my chamber door -
Only this and nothing more."

Ah, distinctly I remember, we were playing away in an Empire,
And each separate flag and banner had been draped upon the floor.
Eagerly I wished for sport; - vainly I had searched and sought
Across radio, TV and web - searching for a score -
For a Jhannan Sports reporter who would tell me of the score -
Unmentioned here for evermore.

And the silken, sad, uncertain rustling of each purple curtain
Thrilled me - filled me with fantastic terrors often felt before;
But this time, to still the beating of my heart, I stood repeating
"'Tis some visitor coming to tell me of the score -
Some late visitor come to tell me of the football score; -
That it is and nothing more."

Presently my soul grew stronger, hesitating then no longer,
"Hey mate," said I, "'tis just the match, I am waiting for the score;
The fact is I was napping, and so gently you came rapping,
Er, so faintly you came tapping, tapping at my chamber door,
That I scarce was sure I heard you" - here I opened wide the door; - -
Darkness there and nothing more.

Back into the chamber turning, all my soul within me burning,
Some accursed children playing Knock and Run at my door.
A second time there was a tapping, coming from my window lattice;
"Let me see, then, where these hoodies are, and this mystery explore -
Let my heart be still a moment and this mystery explore;-
'Tis some kids and nothing more!"

Open here I flung the shutter, when, with many a flirt and flutter,
In there stepped a stately Raven of the Daii days of yore;
Not the least obeisance made he; not a minute stopped or stayed he;
But, with mien of Lord and Daii, perched above my chamber door -
Perched on a tournament trophy just above my chamber door -
Perched, and sat, and nothing more.

Then this ebony bird beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
By the grave and stern decorum that face not once did it yield,
"Though thy crest be shorn and shaven, thou," I said, "art sure no craven,
Ghastly grim and ancient Raven wandering from the Barrow's field —
Tell me what thy lordly name is on the eternal Barrow's field!"
Quoth the Raven "Nevermore."

Startled at the stillness broken by reply so aptly spoken,
"Doubtless," said I, "what it utters is only stock from before
Caught from some unhappy manager whom unmerciful Disaster
Followed fast and followed faster, repeating perhaps a certain score -
Till the dirges of his Hope always expected a certain score."
Quoth the Raven "Nevermore."

But the Raven still beguiling my sad fancy into smiling,
Straight I wheeled an office chair in front of bird, and bust, and door;
Then, upon the leather sinking, I betook myself to linking
Fancy unto fancy, thinking what this ominous bird of yore -
What this grim, ungainly, ghastly, gaunt and ominous bird of yore
Meant in croaking "Nevermore."

This I sat engaged in guessing, but no syllable expressing
To the fowl whose fiery eyes now burned into my bosom's core;
This and more I sat divining, with my eyes at last alighting
On the trophy, ever-shining, that the lamp-light gloated o'er,
But whose silver-gold shining with the lamp-light gloating o'er,
He would lift, ah, nevermore!

Then, methought, the air grew denser, perfumed from an unseen censer
Swung by angels whose foot-falls tinkled on the tufted floor.
"Wretch," I cried, "thy Gods hath lent thee — by these angels he hath sent thee
Respite — respite forever from thy memories of a score;
Quit, oh quit thy place of sitting and forget this ancient score!"
Quoth the Raven "Nevermore."

"Prophet!" said I, "thing of evil! — prophet still, if bird or devil! —
Whether Tempter sent, or whether tempest tossed thee here ashore,
Desolate yet all undaunted, on this fertile land enchanted —
On this home by Horror haunted — tell me truly, I implore —
Is there — is there balm in Ehud? — tell me — tell me, I implore!"
Quoth the Raven "Nevermore."

"Be that word our sign of parting, bird or fiend!" I yelled, upstarting —
"Get thee back into the Barrow and beyond the mortal shore!
Leave no black plume as a token of that lie thy soul hath spoken!
Leave our number ten unbroken! — quit the Cup above my door!
Take thy beak from out my heart, and take thy form from off my door!"
Quoth the Raven "Nevermore."

And the Raven, never flitting, still is sitting, still is sitting
On the Invitational Trophy just above my chamber door;
And his eyes have all the seeming of a daemon's that is dreaming,
And the lamp-light o'er him streaming throws his shadow on the floor;
And my soul from out that shadow that lies floating on the floor
Shall be lifted — nevermore!