NationStates Jolt Archive

After the usual controversy and absentees in national selection, thirteen remain to travel to Kura-Pelland for its second major event in a very short space of time indeed - almost as soon as Az-cz walked away triumphant with the World Cup from Shanvley Stadium in the north-west of Trilan, a variety of the multiverse's most exciting and surprising musical talents come to the city's central Unity Arena.

20,193 fans and 900 members of the media are in place. The stage is dominated by a large video wall, and there are vast quantities of LED lights that extend beyond the stage and onto a central walkway. Most of the other lighting is LED too, including a great array of moving lights - though there are strict limitations on the use of strobe effects, and there are no separate strobes here - though the moving lights can be used for that effect if one must. There will be a five-second delay before each song featuring strobes, to provide full warning for those with epilepsy or other sensory issues. (This has been Kura-Pellandi television guidance for some time now, and is used for literally every incidence of flashing lights - including this short weather ident aired on NTV (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=gxi0sfzpECU), which means that every time there's a thunderstorm coming people know about it because of the strobe warning...)

Anyway, we're here for the songs. And here they are in alphabetical order!

Alexandrian Ptolemais - The 52, Peter Montgomerie
Bazalonia - Back In It Again, Out Of The Hat
Khenas - Perpetual Love, Salenja Tasnike
Kura-Pelland - Voice of Hope Within, Katherine West
Magnus Valerius - Sick With Love, DJ Isan featuring Viktoria Isanderova
Mallatarsland - Survival Song, Desborough Donkey and the Donkettes
Popay - We Know No Bounds, The Fashion Police
Schnitzelfest - Summer Love, The Sirens
Scotchpinestan - Crying Accomplishes Nothing, Laura Simons
Sorthern Northland - Hard To Score, Lo-Fi
Swilatia - It's Not Fair, The Group
Wentland - Look At My C**k, Willie and the Winkers
Wijaska Island - Vampire Lord, Random Worlds
Zwangzug - Happy Boredday, Pi a la Modre

We already know about some, but not all, of these from the national qualifiers. We know that the hosts' representative Katherine West has a pretty, but pretty sickly, ballad. We know that Magnus Valerius are pumping up the beats-per-minute. We know that Sorthern Northland have a parody of a song popular in some parts of RL. We know that Schnitzelfest have something upbeat with genuine popularity in their country.

We don't know what Zwangzug have got, although there'll be some Kura-Pellandi musicians listening out for Picardian thirds all the same. We don't know what Wentland have, apart from it necessitating a time delay to live broadcasts in most countries to get the swear filter working. And we've no idea what's coming from Bazalonia either.

But we'll see.

Who will take to the stage first?

Wiadzase: Another year, another terrible song contest. Why must things continue like this?

Jawalski: Well, we're back down to 14 countries again, and I can tell this is just going to go lower as the contest progresses. This might finally be the end of WorldVision!

Wiadzase: Well, I hope it is, but who know, they might try to start a fith one anyways... maybe we should see what we have this year?

Jawalski: Well, we really don't know what we're going to get form a lot of lot of countries. Zwangzug, Bazalonia, Mallatarsland, lots of dark horses here. But we do know there's going to be mare squealing from Kura-Pelland. And it looks like the hosts are trying to censor the Wentland entry, Look at my cock.

Wiadzase: Censoring a song in the contest? I though we've moved past that stage since the first contest. I mean, really, it's just words. If the moms and religious preachers don't like it, too fucking bad. Wait, look, I just swore! Tape-delay that, all you foreign broadcasters.

Jawalski: Well done. Still, let's not go to far with this. This Kura-Pelland is another one of those "think of the kiddies" countries. Seriously, they feel the need to put a warning in front of every instance of flashing lights. In fact, you know how if you're looking at the Weather, you know there's going to be storms if there's a storm icon?

Wiadzase: Yeah...

Jawalski: In Kura-Pelland, you know there's going to be storm if you se "strobe warnings" on the weather channel. On the freaking weather channel! Seriously! If, they are really going to force their "think of the kiddies" attitude on the rest of the world, we're going to have to delay it by an extra 5 seconds to get those notices out.

Wiadzase: Indeed. Stupid "family values" politicians. Anyway, what about the other songs? I heard the Wijaska Island song was going to be about vampires or something like that. And us? What disaster are we responsible for this time?

(Random worlds walk onto a dark stage, followed by an army of zombies which then stops walking and stands in the upstage. The band stands in the centre, music starts playing)

When the sun comes down, I rise
Killing people just to stay alive
We could never go out in the sun
When I come you know your life is done!

(singer, dressed as a vampire, is walking towards audience, zombies dancing, lots of flashing lights, mostly red.)

I am the Vampire Lord!
You know the legend!
You know why i'm here!
I am the Vampire Lord!
I'm here to kill!
I'm here to kill you all!

(Zombies stop dancing, stage is just barely lit again)

A slave to the darkness of the night
I'm forced to kill just to survive
I never said I wanted this
But I've been forced and now it's how I live.

(more flashing lights and dancing zombies)
I am the Vampire Lord!
You know the legend!
You know why i'm here!
I am the Vampire Lord!
I'm here to kill!
I'm here to kill you all!

(Singer directs the band and zombies to "prepare for battle", they do so as these lines are being sung. near the end, they are pointed towards the audience and are slowly walking in that direction)

My legions of the undead
Are here to cut your lives even shorter
I was just some guy
And now I rule this world tonight
And as long as I kill
My life just might last forever

(Band and zombies rush towards audience, As if the are planning to kill them. on the last lines, singer puts one arm in the air, band and zoombies stop)

I am the Vampire Lord!
You know the legend!
You know why i'm here!
I am the Vampire Lord!
I'm here to kill!
I'm here to kill you all!
I am the Vampire Lord!
And soon, I will be your only lord!

(The stage darkens in preperation for the Popayen song entry. As soon as the first few cords from guitarest Gane Sormonla the stage flashes and some stage fireworks go of. The lead singer of the Fashion Police, Kane Urbun, starts to scream out the lyrics of the song)

We figured it out first, it wasn't you,
So don't take out credit, our pride,
If you say it was you, then your just being rude,
Because we fought, we made, we tried.

(Kane pauses as a short musical intlude takes place with drums, bass and guitar easily aduable)

It's because we know no bounds,
No bounds and no limits,
No way to stop our feelings,
Black Haired girl I scream,
WE KNOW NO BOUNDS!

Saw you in the park, with your freinds,
To be honest, there either Emos or Preps,
But I can't figure out who you are,
who are you?
who are you?
WHO THE HELL ARE YOU?

(Yet another musical inturlde, this time Kane paces the stage)

We Know no bounds,
We Know no limits,
When we start we cannot stop,
Not intill you are mine,
Black Haired Girl I scream,
WE KNOW NO BOUNDS!

I don't know why I like you,
But then I did fail school,
Your flat chested, got stupid hair,
and too be honest don't look good,
But there is something about you,
About you,
About you,
About yoooouuu,

(A longer musical interlude this time, and Kane screams to the audience about how good they are)

It's because we know no bounds,
That we do not think about this,
We could knock you down, but,
Black Haired girl I say,
Why you,
Why you,
WHY YOU?

It's because we know no bounds,
That we do not care,
We are the Fashion Police,
And therefore we don't care,
We know no bounds,
Black Haired girl,
We know no bounds,
Black Haired girl,
And you know what?


We just don't care...

(The stage darkens as the music quitens and the guitar plays the final few notes)

A WorldVision party in a large bar just north-west of central Trilan, five subway stops along from the Unity Arena heading towards Shanvley. It is absolutely packed. We overhear a conversation between JAMES, who presents the PBS Nightly News on weeknights, and CLARA, a student at Trilan's Central College of Music.

JAMES: Are you enjoying tonight?
CLARA: Yes, yes, I am enjoying tonight. The songs are getting a bit... samey though...
JAMES: But we've only had two...
CLARA: Yes, and they sound the same...
JAMES: We've got Magnus Valerius at some point, and our ballad...
CLARA: Yes, I quite like that one. I wish I could sing up there though; I'm an alto really. She starts speaking in an excessively deep and sultry voice. You know... this isn't worth watching really... we're not here for the music, are we?
JAMES: What are we here for then?
CLARA: You know what we're here for...

CLARA winks. JAMES starts looking uneasy.

Peter Montgomerie had just a second to catch his breath before he was on stage; the group around him were ensuring their guitars were in tune, and within a minute they started playing the first few notes (OOC: the song is to the tune of Love Is All Around; at least the 1960s version)

I can’t believe I saw her on the 52
She’s absolutely lovely; I can’t believe its so
She’s sitting at the end; she’s everywhere I go
But does she really love me; or am I delusional

I cannot get her out of my head
My mind’s clogged up by the way that I feel
The 52 has become a pain
‘Cause that tram has her on it

I see her face before me on William Street
I retreat slowly back to my seat
She remains in my head; even as I disembark
I need her beside me; even if I’m delusional

I cannot get her out of my head
My mind’s clogged up by the way that I feel
The 52 has become a pain
‘Cause that tram has her on it

I walk through the door; and she’s at it
She really loves me; and that’s a thrill
On the 52
On the 52
On the 52

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
APMA Back Office

After all the flag waving and celebratory cheers, Thomas Henderson and his assistant sat back and looked through the performances so far

"Well, it seems that we have been dished up with another serving of crap; about the only good thing about this bloody awful competition is that we get to spend it up large here; especially with the low exchange rate."

"Yes, Sir, it is quite a nice place; once this is all over, we might recommend it to Empire Air. Oh well, what did you think of the Wijaskan performance"

"One word; complete and utter crap. I cannot believe that someone would waste their time on vampires, I know they do not exist, you know they do not exist. Which idiot thinks they exist? Probably paid up members of the Labour Party. Of course, they need to kill people to stay alive as well, so I think they both co-exist quite nicely. At least the performance of whathisface..."

"You mean Popay"

"I knew it idiot; anyways, their performance was marginally better. Nice mix of the guitar and the lyrics, although I get somewhat concerned that this would be the sort of music that wrist-cutters would like to listen to."

"You mean emos"

"Yep, them things. Ptolemais is getting full of them; if they want to get rid of their blood, why not just donate it for five Sesterces a pint. They are probably paid up Labour Party members too."

"Oh well, I'll get us some coffee - there must be a decent coffee place around here."

As the last of the equipment for Out of the Hat, which really was a one man act that had a backing band, which by no means were bad but weren't anything to write home about either, were being unloaded by the roadies ready for their performance, a be-draggled man, looking as if he hadn't slept and had some jet lag.

"Damn this, BazAir didn't have a direct flight here so I had to jump through all these hoops." He said to himself, no one was around listening and doesn't really effect the story, apart from letting you know abit of the background story. He came up to one of the roadies who were "working" more like relaxing on the side of the truck, he asked. "Where's Out of the Hat?"

"Over there somewhere." he said pointing in a general direction to somewhere, there didn't seem to be anything over there, but as he turned back to face the roadie he was asleep. He remembered the parable his mother always told him, "Always let a sleeping Roadie lie", bah it was because of her that he was here anyway. With the early exit out of the World cup he dfidn't really have anything to do.

So he went off in the general direction he was pointed in, without saying it was totally in the wrong direction, it took just over an hour but eventually he had found the one he was looking.

"Weirdo Stevo", as he liked to be called "I need to talk to talk to you, please don't do this."

"Sorry, I'm not going to change this, but she's going to flip her lid when she see's this."

"Sorry mate."

"Okay, she needs a good healthy dose of reality, but this? Please?"

"Sorry too late to change now... here, have a free ticket to the comp. It's going to be interesting."

~~~~

"Ladies and Gentlemen, please welcome to the Stage the Bazalonian entry, Out of the Hat with, Back in in it Again."

Lights started off, a dim echoing drum solo started to get louder... As it did the lights gradually got brighter and brighter to reveal Out of the Hat starting their performance. The large video screen shone brightly, it seemed to be some sort of press conference or something. Kura-Pellandi, or any one involvled with the World Cup (soccer/football/whatever you want to call it) would recognise the scene. It was the group draw for the World Cup held in Kura-Pelland and Vephrall the same world cup that just finished... The video started to play....

[chorus]
Oh, yes we're in it again
Another entry in another tournament
We won't do well, but we don't care
for we are in it again.


The video didn't seem to be that exciting it was someone talking, presumably about what's going to happen.


Mrs. Coulter for the whole world to see
Went to the draw, why we don't know
She came and demanded, but left with a bandage
The President's mother was certainly popular


In comes Mr.s Coulter, the mother to the President of the Bazalonian Federation of Soccer Associations, BFSA for short, she sits down among the other assembled delegates, holding her handbag on her lap all prim and proper

[chorus]

She raised an objection at the use of SLANI
Determined to give them some of her mind
though how much did she have to spare? not much i bet.
perhaps that's why a penknife found her arm.


A man, to those in the know from Adi'han a protectorate and city.. oh, and region within Liverpool England, holding a pen knife stabbing her in the shoulder, also it was obvious there was quite significant amount of time skip

[chorus]

To the word sluts she did take some umberage
As well as calling them a sore loser
To try and control a kindergarten she said she came.
But no one thought about who would control the teacher


The Video seemingly rewound fast, to a point where Mrs Coulter was standing up, obviously very upset, distressed about something.


[bridge]
Yes, she did, Yes we know
Yes, she wasn't in control
Luckily though, for us perhaps
that her son stood up and took her off the plate.



The video finished quotes flashed up on the screen "... those cheating Az-czids... - Kiso Night "

"Now Mr. Night. Such allegations are not appropriate. I'm sure if you did think that the Az-czids did cheat you should bring it up with Mr. Gaines. - Mrs. Coulter"

"Gaines replied saying I was being a sore loser.- Kiso Night"

"Well, I'm sure you were, then. - Mrs. Coulter"

[chorus]

Oh, yes we are in it again, not doing well
oh, yes, we are in it again, why don't we just macrome?
Oh, yes, we're in it again, in a song contest what for?
oh, yes we are in it again... and again... and again...


OOC: This song is inspired by silly events that were RPed over IRC.

Wiadzase: So, we've had four songs already, Wijaska Island, Popay, Alexandrian Ptolemais, and Bazalonia. Now with the first one, it really made no sense. Seriously, DANICING ZOMBIES?? What the hell? I thought zombies were supposed to walk slowly, aimlessly, and make weird groaning noises all the time?

Jawalski: Well, with no real rombies actually existing, this is kind of open to interpretation. Still, the song was rather stupid, it wass all just "kill to survive". Hell, back in the... what was it again... prehistory, we all killed to survive, it just usually wasn't other people tthat we killed. And what about the other songs?

Wiadzase: Let's see... we already went over Wijaska Island, Popay sounds one of those emo songs, well i guess we'll know more when the voting comes, now Alexandrian Ptolemais had a really weird act.

Jawalski: Well, really I just found it to be another love song, just in a strange setting... and what about the Bazalonians?

Wiadzase: I didn't really understand it. Maybe they were singing about the World Cup or something like that.

Jawalski: The World Cup? You know, this makes me wonder, why doesn't our team ever reach the World Cup? We've been trying to get in for years now...

Wiadzase: Well, we didn't even enter this time, but other times, I'm really not sure... Although do wish we would finally make it, maybe then I'll have better stuff to talk about than just this shitty contest... Any idea what's coming up?

There is a lot of billowing smoke fanning across the stage and a low humming can be heard. The Orchestra then strikes up playing the intro and entering stage left is a Pantomime Donkey surrounded by dancing girls in skimpy black lace French Army style uniforms.

The Donkey begins to sing.

OOC: To the tune of Gloria Gaynors I will survive.

I wasn't just afraid I was petrified
I knew her reputation and felt sick inside
And having spent so many nights
wondering if the food would come
I grew weak
with a black and swollen tongue
And now shes back
Just like the other place
She never fed me then
It was a damned discrace
I should have run away
I should have made you take me back
If you'd known just for one second
You would have give her the sack.

So now then Faith
Walk out the door
I'm feeling bloody hungry
You don't feed me any more
You were the one who tried to kill me with a spade
And when that didn't work
you gave me poisoned lemonde
But I won't die
I will survive
despite your bestest efforts
I am still alive
And although I'm really thin
I think I am going to win
I will survive.

Hay Hay

APMA Back Office

"You know this coffee that you found is absolutely brilliant. How much was it again?"

"It was about 7 kaks; it translates to about four drachma or something like that. Anyways, what did you think of these performances?"

"Much better; I loved the one with the donkey in it; what was it again?"

"Mallatarsland"

"I knew it you freckin twit. Anyways, the donkey, and the whores on stage made it quite interesting. But pity the fact that the donkey was starving; I couldn't tolerate it. Reminds me a bit of the dream I had of a crying duck about to be eaten. Quite eerie actually. Anyways, it was much better than that World Cup performance by Bazalonia; even though in saying that, it was much better than the ole days."

"Yep, want me to get some more coffee?"

"Of course; cheap and good. What I like."

In a heavy contrast with the songs before it, the khenian entry did not have much flashing lights, video, dnacers, or any other such such effects with it. Insted, the stage was mostly taken up by the singer to herself, although a small orchestra is visible. The stage slowly lit up and the music started playing.

You are my one love, kocham ciebie.
A adoran'lo va se far
adoran va se forever
Nothing can break us apart!

Léyalao
Perperpetual love between us
Léyalao
I'm here...

The world falls
But our love stands tall
Se adorise va...
Se adorise va...
I'm here!
I'm here I am
am
Léyalao
Léyala- Léyala- Léyalao

(instrumental break)

We will never split apart, no.
We are one, yes we're one.
Yes, na zawsze, I na wieczność
A adoran va se

Léyalao
Perperpetual love between us
Léyalao
I'm here...

The world falls
But our love stands tall
Se adorise va...
Se adorise va...
I'm here!
I'm here I am
am
Léyalao
Léyala- Léyala- Léyalao
Here I am!
am
Léyala- Léyala- Léyalao
I'm here...

Wiadzase: So, E've just heard the songs from Mallatarland or something like that, and Khenas. And wait, we're already almost halfway through?

Jawalski: Yeah, we're down to 14 again, remember?

Wiadzase: Yeah. And it's good that we're down. less of this crap to deal with. I mean, come on, a singing donkey??

Jawalski: Yeah, it was definately faked, with the voice probably coming from one of the dancers or something like that. I would not believe nonsense like that for a minute. Even less likely for as much as five of them.

Wiadzase: Well, it's not as much the "fakedness" of it as the cheesiness. I find the idea of trying to make it look like a donkey is singing very cheesy. Come on, only little kids would expect anything to come out of out of a donkey's mouth other then "Ee-orr ee-orr ee-orr ee-oor".

Jawalski: So, okay, we've decided that the Mallatarsland entry is one of the reasons why WorldVision sucks so bad. But what about the Khenas entry, perpetual love?

Wiadzase: From the title, I thought it would just be a love song. However, instead we get 5 minutes of multilingual nonsense. Really. Tasnike is a good singer, so it's a shame har talent is wasted on stuff like this. And who was she so wildly in love with anyways?

Jawalski: I'd say the lyrics were more then just "nonsense". To me, it sounded like those of a remix, or of the shit Lovisa used to send to this contest. Seriously, this song's lyrics remind me of the shit that was "Hi-fi superstar", and that, to me, is a good reason to hate the song.

Wiadzase: Indeed, sure, only the Lovisans can do the real thing, but this girl is just wasting her talent

Jawalski: Only the lovisans? I don't know. Magnus Valerius look like they have something similar.

Wiadzase: So, does that mean, in a way, Lovisa's back? Oh god no...

"Where is the Wentland representative? He missed all the rehearsals."

Just then a grinning ginger gentleman with brightly coloured harlequin-esque clothing, spray-painted Mock Martins and vast spectacles bounded forward. "Helllooooooooooo!!! Ready for Winkertime?? Wicked Willie is here!!!"

The Kura-Pelland greeter extended a hand and Willie did likewise. However the greeter recoiled in horror as Willie's hand came off in his. "Hee hee!!! The old rubber hand. Nothing could be better than that. Here you go, have some peanuts to compensate."

The greeter took the can and twisted off the lid. "Augggghh!!!!" A number of springy paper snakes leapt out and caused much consternation. "Hee hee!!! Got you then...now, when do I perform?"

"Is it just you then? Where's your group?"

"Oh, they'll be looking for the entrance. They're a bunch of idiots. Oh, here they are!"

A seemingly-makeshift ragtag of shambolic musicians, with washboards, mandolins, ukeleles and an electric mangle, all attired similarly to Willie, bounded through the door. "Here they are! The Winkers!!! Are you ready for a sound explosion?"

"Err...not sure."

"When are we on? Everything in order? Hang on, what's that?"

"Your song."

"C**k? How do I pronounce **? Think someone's having you on, mate. It should be an o and a c. Hang on, where's me bic? I'll sort this out."

"No...that's the cap...oh dear..."

bump...

DJ Isan's booth is ready and the DJ, who is the most popular trance DJ in The Valerian Empire, emerges amongst the cheering of fans (especially the ladies). He is soon followed by Vikotria Isanderova. She is a young, very sexy Valerian girl in her early twenties, with sandy-brown hair flowing behind her and 'lusty hips' (according to her manager). She is wearing a glimmering dress. Hoots and hollers from the Valerian men in the audience ensue as she blows them kisses and winks.

ANNOUNCER: "Ladies and gentlemen, may I present to you, the #1 DJ in The Valerian Empire, DJ Isan!!!"

*Cheering*

ANNOUNCER: "...featuring a very special guest, pop idol Viktoria Isanderova!!!"

*Cheering*

ANNOUNCER: "...with their song, Sick With Love!"

DJ ISAN: “Let’s get this shindig started alright!”

DJ starts off with a trance beat while Viktoria begins to sing about 40 seconds later. The lights go with DJ Isan's beat and Isanderova's lyrical flow. A couple of go-go dancers dressed in the same dress as Isanderova emerge on the sides of the stage and begin to dance.

I don’t know what I’m feelin’
But it’s got me reelin’
You’ve got me groovin’
We gotta keep movin’
The DJ keeps the music flowing
And together we both are glowing
Brighter than all the stars in the late night sky

Because I’m sick with love
I wanna be your dove
Let’s both fly in the sky above
Cause I’m sick with love
And I wanna be with you

I can’t seem to get enough of you, baby
Shame we don’t see each other daily
Take me out to the floor to dance
Come on, let's take a chance
There’s a coldness out here alright
But I’ll be warm if I’m with you tonight
I want to know what I’m feeling…

Because I’m sick with love
I wanna be your dove
Let’s both fly in the sky above
Cause I’m sick with love
And I wanna be with you

DJ Isan does a solo with some beats for about a minute. Isan begins a buildup.

Can you feel the music’s beat?
You and I truly are complete
All the lights are shining bright
And I’m not feeling contrite
Let’s go hand-in-hand
In this journey called life…

The buildup is done and the DJ does a trance breakdown.

This rush is coming upon me
So please don’t leave me be
We definitely need each other
This feeling we can’t smother
I’m not modest so I’m gonna be honest
I know what this feeling is
I’m in love with yoooouuuuuuu….

DJ Isan wraps the rest of the song up with a minute of techno-trance. Viktoria Isanderova begins to dance. The track eventually begins to slow down and then stops.


OOC: I don't really know what tune this would go to... if I had skills I'd produce a track for it tho, heh.

If anything it's "dunk-ata-dunk-ata-dunk". :P

After the second chorus of Happy Boredday, the spotlight shines on the percussionist, who's been playing normally the entire song. In the drumbreak, however, he reverts to a simple, steady beat-almost like a clock. When the third verse begins, it's a whole step higher than the other two.

The song sounds something like this (http://www.zshare.net/audio/580716299927da/).

Midnight and the world dreams on
So begins your special day
Sleeping through it, don't complain
When the year turns out this way

So all I wish for you is a happy boredday
May the dream you dream sustain you till you wake
You'll wish you could sleep through days that will come
(Those that start out with a break.)

Your eye's fixed upon the clock
Where is its exactitude?
If you miss the "precise" time
Will you sink into a mood?

So all I wish for you is a happy boardday
In the hope that you're not so rigid and tense
Wood may float, but you're just treading water
Although at least, you're not dense...

(Key change!)

Twilight and the time's flown by
Will this year outshine the last?
Let your future be your goal
Don't be hampered by your past

So all I wish for you is a happy birdday
Spread your wings and fly above and beyond here
Soar into the sky, face the horizon
Look ahead into the year.

[OOC: wahey! Someone else submitting a MIDI file!

Reminds me, I'm going to have to completely rewrite my entry as it really was a song I'd half-finished writing and then lost the lyrics to...]

Ivan Anchikov: "Well, Valerians, it seems that all of the acts are coming through with their performances. And, wow, there's a lot of wierd acts out there! From some weird zombie choreography to donkeys that supposedly sing."

Pavila Malatova: "Yeah, Ivanka. But my favorite act has gotta be DJ Isan's Sick With Love! He and Viktoria Isanderova created that song just for this competition! I bet it's gonna be their next #1 hit on RaveRadio!"

Anchikov: "Really? I personally think that the acts from Zwangzug and Alexandrian Ptolemais were really good. Popay's act was on some weird song about... emus?"

Malatova: "It's emos."

Anchikov: "Right... what's an 'emo'?"

Malatova: "Hmmm... I'm not really sure. Maybe it's a type of dumpling."

Anchikov: "Sounds tasty!"

Malatova: "Well, the WorldVision contest is a little around half done! We still have to see how Swilatia's group is gonna play."

Anchikov: "And I definitely wanna see what Kura-Pelland's contestant has up their sleeve."

The Sirens are a well renowned home grown Schnitzelfest band who have enjoyed moderate success - they come here to World Vision 4 with their most popular hit song that has taken the nation by storm. The song is titled Summer Love - which tells the story of a young lady of the Mountain seducing a young male. Mount Oberstervater is the largest mountain in Schnitzelfest. The chorus is sung in a native tongue/chant.

http://www.clipland.com/res/artistGallery/100033881/clipland4.jpg

The song has a similar tune to the following MIDI: Click Here to Hear (http://www.fortunecity.de/wolkenkratzer/stahl/738/losdelrio_MACARENA.mid)

~~~
On the slopes of Mount Oberstervater
To spend the summer days I can think of no place greater
The cool breeze, the sun beams
Are all radiating down upon me
Come join me, and we’ll see
All the pleasures to be, alone just you and me

A la tuhuelpa legria Oberstervater
Que tuhuelce paralla legria cosabuena
A la tuhuelpa legria Oberstervater Eeeh, Oberstervater

Now don’t you worry about my father
He doesn’t know any better
I told him I was out at a friend’s house all night
and wouldn’t back until dawn

A la tuhuelpa legria Oberstervater
Que tuhuelce paralla legria cosabuena
A la tuhuelpa legria Oberstervater Eeeh, Oberstervater

Lets join together and enjoy life’s delights
having fun in the sun, and making love under moonlight
You know you want me, come have me
and together we shall be
Forever, together,
On the slopes of Mount Oberstervater

A la tuhuelpa legria Oberstervater
Que tuhuelce paralla legria cosabuena
A la tuhuelpa legria Oberstervater Eeeh, Oberstervater
*Repeats and Fades out*
~~~

Jawalski: So, we're already past the halfway mark, we've already had 10, no, 9 performances, anyway, we've heard from Magnus Valerius, Zwangzug, and Schnitzelfest (Pronounces this one "Snizzlefest")

Wiadzase: Seemed more like Lovisa, Zwangzug, and Lovisa really.

Jawalski: What about the Zwangzug entry?

Wiadzase: Nothing special. Deosn't really stand out against all the weirdery we have here, Although it made a nice break between the two Lovisa songs.

Jawalski: Yeah it did, but no entry will ever give us a good enough break for the contest as Sorthern Northland's entry last year. Remember, it was a whole 3 minutes of perfect silence.

Wiadzase: Last year's break was better, if only it was in a better spot. Still, at least we have some sort of break. I mean, come, on, look at those songs. Sure we did not have remix-esque lyrics although the Khenas entry, which was just before, did, the Melodies were really bad, like they were just trying to sell theselves to bored teenagers going to cheap schools when there's really nothing to... well, the point is, it's a shame that these songs are popular int their original countries

Jawalski: Well, it has to do with the with the girls I guess. Since they look like they walked out of a fashion magazine, it makes people think they are good singers. Even the fact that these kind of girls usually can't sing to save their lives hasn't been enough to dispel this urban legend. Maybe they just buy the CD's for the girl's pictue on the cover...

Wiadzase: So, yeah, bored teenagers. When you're bored, it's easier to sell trash to you. Anyways, who still needs to perform?

Jawalski: Let'se see, there's Sorthern Northland, who knows, maybe we'll get a song from them this time, Kura Pelland, with more screaming, Wentland, with a performance that the hosts are prolly going to try and censor, Scotchpinestan, with something... Oh, and us, with a group of people who, um, complain too much.

The menagerie of Willie and the Winkers meandered through the backstage. Wendy Pencil was busy pulling coins from behind people's ears, The Spudgun was yelling the key question "Daddy or Chips? CHIPS!!!!?" to anyone who approached, Lord Ambivalent Of Decisive Thought was poking people with his umbrella. And Willie the King Winker himself was orchestrating the charade with his inimitable style, or lack thereof.

"Are we on yet?" he asked. "You know the world is waiting for the Winkers! We had a number one hit you know!"

"Yes," said a jaded representative, "seven years ago. For one week. And you were a one hit wonder."

"Better to be a one hit wonder than a no hit wonder, wouldn't you say? He he he! The Winkers are back!"

The representative rolled his eyes and muttered under his breath. "Heaven help us..."

(The performance was almost completely devoid of special effect, with the stage being dark for most of the song. It did however, light up (somewhat) for the chorus.)

You work so many hours a day, they pay you almost nothing
Summer's too short, and so is love
The christmas season starts too soon, and every year it's longer
And now you wait, your train is late

We never reach the World Cup
And everything just costs too much
It isn't fair
Why must things go on like this?
When all we want is this to change.

My flat is very small, yet horribly expensive
Less and less parks, more shopping hells.
Is there a reason why the world just keeps on fighting
too many wars, too many deaths

We never reach the World Cup
And everything just costs too much
It isn't fair
Why must things go on like this?
When all we want is this to change.

No-one takes a stand offline
Although we want to, all the time
But why don't they know?
Is it like they just don't care
about what's wrong with our land?

(instrumental break)

We never reach the World Cup
And everything just costs too much
It isn't fair
Why must things go on like this?
When all we want is this to change.

So many things that aren't fair
Our lives are left in disrepair
Well, I'll have you know
You see things can't just stay this way
We must join hands, and make a change

bump.

"Ladies and gen..."

The announcement for the next song was interrupted by titters when a sheep wandered across the stage, bleating happily, pursued by a Winker. Willie pursued both, with a chaotic train of animals and a dozen shabby shambling be-dungareed check-shirted yokels with electric mangles, washboards, zithers, banjolilies and serpents. "Sorry about Chris, he gets so excited to be on stage...shall we do our song now?"

"Ahh! That cow's nibbling my hem!!! Get it away!!!"

"Sorry! That's Ermintrude...she likes you..."

"Oh, just get on and do it! Augh! It's slobbering on my heels!!!"

"Right..."

The music started, a homely mix of strummed ukelele chords and chaotic percussion, twangy and staccato. Willie strode to the front of the stage.

Have you seen my cock?
Have you seen my cock?
It's proud and strong
It's really very long
I want to show my cock...
I'm going to show my cock...

Willie reached into his dungarees. Meanwhile the production crew were going berserk. "Cut it! CUT IT!!! STOP!!!! Where's the vision mixer?"

Unfortunately for the television company the vision mixer had been seduced by Becki the Bathing Beauty and Trixie Trouble, the Blonde Bikini Bombshells, who were cavorting at the back of the stage with eggwhisks and maracas and, to the chagrin of the production crew, a masked figure who looked surprisingly like the vision mixer and another one that looked surprisingly like the chap in charge of the bleep machine.

"AUUGHHH!!! This is a DISASTER...does anyone know which button does which?"

The editor pressed a button, which released a pyrotechnic firework intended for the Mallatarsland display and which evidently had not been fired at the right time. Willie and the Winkers never noticed, such was the chaotic noise they were creating.

I'm going to get my cock...

Willie pulled from his dungaree trousers a rather large chicken, with proud comb erect.

Look at my cock!
Look at my cock!
It's bigger than a sock
It's the bestest cock!

The Winkers all danced around for the chorus.

Look at his cock!
Look at his cock!
It'll make you rock
What a great cock!

They bounced back with their instruments as Willie got on with the second verse.

Have you seen my dick?
Have you seen my dick?
So nice and thick
And needs a lick
I want to show my dick...
I'm going to show my dick...

The producer and stage manager charged the stage to prevent Willie showing his dick. To no avail.

"Sorry, no-one allowed on stage during the performance."

"I'm the PRODUCER! I need to stop this atrocity!"

"And I'm the Bishop of Blodwyn, sir. There's been worse songs."

"Let me THROUGH!!!"

"Not without a pass, sir."

"I left it in the mixing bay! It's on my blazer!"

"Well, you can't come on stage without it, sir. Besides which, Willie's about to show his dick."

And Willie did. A rather well fed guinea pig called Dick.

Look at my dick!
Look at my dick!
The best one to pick
It's the cutest dick!

The Winkers all danced around (again) for the chorus.

Look at his dick!
Look at his dick!
It'll make you sick
What a great dick!

Willie moved aside to allow Wendy Pencil to move forward for the final verse.

Have you seen my beaver?
Have you seen my beaver?
It's hairy and brown
And won't let you down
I want to show my beaver...
I'm going to show my beaver...

The producer was anxious, but the stage manager was slightly calmer. "I bet it's an aquatic mammal or something..."

Sure enough, Wendy Pencil reached into her sack and pulled out a rather docile buck-toothed water rat-like thing.

Look at my beaver!
Look at my beaver!
It's better than Eva
Longoria's cleaver!

The Winkers all danced around (again) for the chorus.

Look at her beaver!
Look at her beaver!
It gives us dance fever
What a great beaver!

The Blonde Bikini Bombshells sashayed to the front of the stage for the final verse. The stage manager and producer relaxed a little, the song nearly over.

Have you seen our tits?
Have you seen our tits?
They're firm and pert
And'll make you alert
We want to show our tits...
We're going to show our tits...

"Blue tits? Or coal tits?" asked the stage manager of the producer.

"Dunno, but given the tightness of those bikinis they will have to be little tits...not much room..."

The Bombshells undid the back of their bikini tops. They were definitely great tits.

"AUGGHH!!! CUT!! CUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!"

This'll boost Morality Party support, the producer thought to himself, as the techies were hurriedly forced back into service for the next song. Millions of people will complain that this song was ever allowed to appear in the first place.

Three songs remained; Sorthern Northland's RL parody, Kura-Pelland's ballad, and whatever the slani hell Scotchpinestan entered.

NTV switchboards were flaring up with complaints already. Nielsen-esque boxes were starting to report substantial numbers turning over, many of them to Plus3's pre-election debate. Oh, if the Morality Party candidate knew what was happening...

Oh shit...

Jawalski: So, I've been thinking about this bored teenagers thing. Maybe this is how we're going to get our volunteers.

Wiadzase: Good idea, although just cause our goal is simpler now, does not mean it's any easier. I mean, where we going to find these "bored teenagers"? How are we going to convince then to go onto our little show? What are we going to represent the points with?

Jawalski: I don't know either. I'll have some idea when the voting period comes. What about the songs?

Wiadzase: Well, to start off, our was actually okay enough compared to the nonsense we entered last year, but it's still nonsense. Seriously, there's people STARING TO DEATH in some places, and they insteadchoose to complain anout minor issues like the World Cup, train schedules etc ad infinitum. Seriously, there are more important things to deal with.

Jawalski: Yeah, it's a bit silly. But at least the lyrics actually mean something this time around. Remember Fayala Sanie? The lyrics for that song weren't even in a real language!

Wiadzase: So we always end up being responsible for some of the contest's stupidity... but at least this means we don't take the contest too seriously. I mean, look at Wentland, always trying to be the winners in this giant mess.

Jawalski: Yeah, last contest they actually tried to force some goup to participate in the contest just because they were on the charts...

Wiadzase: Oh? The pettes? It was just so funny when the girl actually found out they were in the WorldVision contest. And I heard their entry this year was also this kind of thing.

Jawalski: No, the guys actually wanted to perform. Although they did get weird looks from all the people backstage, since they're one-hit wonders, or something like that...

Wiadzase: Still, it just shows how sill the WBC's attempts to win the contest are getting. And just look what happened on the stage. The WBC realised they made a bad descision, and tried to kick Willie off the stage.

Jawalski: Reminds me of last years entry from Khenas. Remember how the KRMB reacted? It led to the whole organisation being forcibly disbanded. I wonder who's organising the contest for the Khenians now?

Wiadzase: Yeah but another thing about this song, this is the one where the Kura-Pellandis wanted to censor the title. And now we see that by "cock", they meant rooster. So why are they censoring it. Is it that roosters are pictured as evil animals in their religion or something.

Jawalski: No, it just seems like the Kura-Pellandis are easily offended by simple words. And at the end, when the girls showed their tits, all the Kura-Pellandis must have been crying like little babies. And yet we got away with broadcasting the whole song uncensored.

Wiadzase: Yeah, well, our country probably has less family values politicians. We don't have a "morality party" after all. It's more about capitalism vs socialism over here. Anyways, we shouldn't be going off into politics. Next songs?

Jawalski:...

The Sorthern Airways flight had finally landed in Kura-Pelland. On board were a number of Worldvision fans and four drunk idiots and their manager who called themselves Lo-Fi.


"Woo *hic* we're there now?"

"Yeah *hic* I feel so sick."

"Me too. So who won?"

"*hic* won what? *hic*

"The *hic* drinking thing."

"Oh that? *hic* Well I had seventy two pints. *hic*

"Na I didn't beat that."

"*hic* Me neither"

"Or me"

"Or me"

Suddenly the bands manager burst into the toilet cubicle the bands were cramped in.

"Come on lads, we don't wanna be late."

"Late for *hic* what?"

"The Worldvision. Hang on have you been drinking?"

"Yep *hic* 72 pints."

"Wow that must be a record. Well done."

"Oh and *hic* you might wanna get the right time on your watch."

"Eh? Why?"

"Because then you'd know we're already three hours late. I think theres three more entries left."

"Oh shit. Well get up then, we better start moving."

And with that the manager bundled the band off the plane, through airport security and out off the airport.

"Quick, wheres a taxi? Ah there. TAXI! Unity Arena, please driver, as fast as you can."


Some time later, the taxi arrived at the Arena, Lo-Fi may be highly intoxicated but they are here, and they're ready to perform. Soon.

Laura Simons sits at her piano at the center of the stage. Two violists are off to the left, a drummer is in the back, and an electric guitarist is off to the right. The song begins slowly, with just piano and some soft background viola.

I was a woman in love
All was perfect
But when push came to shove
You panicked

And you turned into
This creature
And you painted blue
My pretty pcture

You hurt me
You betrayed me
You insulted me
But I will not cry

Because crying
Accomplishes nothing
Crying
Accomplishes nothing

Second verse, a little louder. Some soft drums and guitar now join in.

I guess I was naive
Yes, I was wrong
Why else would I believe
You were the one?

Your lies, your deeds
Broke my heart
Now I know we need
To be apart

You hurt me
You betrayed me
You insulted me
But I will not cry

More background buildup during the second chorus

Because crying
Accomplishes nothing
Crying
Accomplishes nothing
Nothing!

Interlude; the violists are in full force now, and the guitarist rips off a few high-powered riffs. All the while, Simons increases her intensity at the piano, until it's lamost like she is venting her frustrations out on the keys. The music increases in key right before the next vocal part; Simons's singing now clearly shows her anger.

I was a woman in love
I thought I had it all
I hope you're happy now
Don't come crying to me when you fall!

Your heart is cold as ice
You never cared for me
You want to see me cry
But that's not who I'm supposed to be!

Crying
Accomplishes nothing
Crying
Accomplishes nothing

The last "ing" provides the climax, and all that folows are a few piano notes and Simons softly singing the final words.

Crying
Accomplishes
Nothing

As Simons left the stage to applause, a tall gentleman in a suit and bowler hat took to the stage. "Ladies and gentlemen, I wish to apologize for the actions earlier this evening..."

The stagehands were looking at each other. How had he got on stage? Who WAS he? They turned to see a bouncer at the side suspiciously engrossed in counting banknotes that had a vague Wentland look to them.

"...from the Wentland entry. We have initiated a full investigation into the events and are positive that we will get to the bottom of the problem...and I think we've found it right here..."

The gentleman turned around and dropped his trousers, mooning the audience. The crowd yelped and the chap bounded off stage yelling "yaarrghh!!!! Peachiness is the new black!!!"

APMA Back Office

*knock *knock

"Tom, you have been in the shower for the last two days; now I know that the Wentland performance offended your sensibilities, but for goodness sake, there are other songs that are being performed"

"THAT IS WHY I GET YOU TO TAPE THEM FOR ME"

"Just come out please, we need you to examine the songs"

"Okay, but please get me about three coffees, I will need to look at everything soon"

----------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
"Well, the performance by Scotchpinestan had a manly feel to it, the idea that crying does nothing, which of course is true; I think they could be one of the mid field contenders"

"Yes Tom, I would have to agree on that one, because to be quite frank, we have yet to see something decent, and then there was that performance by you know who"

"Don't even get me into it, when we get back, I will need to make an appointment with my shrink, that has impacted me for life; brrr, I will never think of Guinea Pigs and Chickens in the same way again."

"Oh well, then there was the Swilatian entry."

"What complete and utter rubbish; you don't see us complaining about not getting into the flaming World Cup; and besides, we play rugby, not soccer, so as far as I am concerned, it is complete and utter rubbish. Then there was that performance from; what on earth was it again?"

"Schnitzelfest"

"That's right. Anyways, I don't get that chorus, but I certainly it was alright, the whole mountains thing. I always find that quite enjoyable; and at least enough of it was sung in English."

"Then there was the entry from Zwangzug; I still don't get it, what on earth is a boredday, and why on earth would we want it to be happy?"

"I wouldn't know, however, it has nevertheless, been interesting so far."

"Of course it has, then there was that song by that good looking duo from Magnus Valerius. I can see why they have been doing so well back home, and no doubt will get the votes of many of our people; especially with all the crap that is going around."

"Yes Tom, and then there was the performance from Khenas."

"Two words, one pointer"

bumped.

(OOC: Apologies for the song being a bit crap, wasn't as easy to write a parody for it as I thought it would be.)

Lo-Fi's manager was desperately pacing around the arena, phone glued to his ear. He rang again and again until finally he got through.

"Hello, SorthernVision, Jenny speaking how can I help?"

"Hi's it's Lo-Fi's manager, listen is it to late to send a new band over, it's just we have a massive problem."

"That might be possible, what's the problem?"

"Well the boys had a lot to drink on the plane and are all as drunk as well a Sorthern Northlander."

"Oh for Gods sake, how is that a problem?"

With that the call was ended.

"Hey, manager guy, *hic* is it our turn to perform yet?"

"Yeah, good luck."

The manager emphasized the good luck, he felt they needed plenty of luck if they and he were not to be national embarrassments. The band stumbled onto the stage and drunkenly slurred out a message for the fans and quickly started the song. Of course normally a drunk doing a song is a bit shit, but being used to being in this condition Lo-Fi had adapted to perform as well as a sober man could.

The first chords ripped out around the arena and finally Lo-Fi were in their second element.

(NB: The tune is the same as Hard Fi's Hard to Beat (not to surprisingly) which can be heard here. (http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6cKNa0DQ0I8)

"I see you darling
See you running away from me
You in a trench coat
Eyes giving me a hurtful look
I gave you a dirty look
But you won't get on my hook
Thermostat won't go up
I start to sweat

Oh byeeee
Girl you won't
Give me any time of day

I walked right over
Said Hi how you doing?
You put your fist through me
And girl, you had blood all over me
I said someone call an ambulance
I've gotta take some treatment
You whispered in my ear
You want me outta here

Can I feel it?
Rocking the ambulance
Ah Noooo
Straight back to nowhere-ness
Just your fist
Can't love me, oh no
You've told me something
I know ya hate me
Just wanna kill me
Stand up
Knock me right out
So hard to score, hard to score, hard to scoreee

I spend the night, spend the night in A&E
Heart beating so fast
As nurses put stitches in me
The guy I am
I'm always going down
Stuck on a losing streak
Don't think I'll ever score

Oh byeeee
Girl you won't
Give me any time of the day

Thought all about it
Have I heard the latest?
Girl in the bar
Hates what she did to me
But baby, me and you, will it ever be?
No time to hesitate, I'll never get a girl

Can I feel it?
Rocking the ambulance
Ah Noooo
Straight back to nowhere-ness
Just your fist
Can't love me, oh no
You've told me something
I know ya hate me
Just wanna kill me
Stand up
Knock me right out
So hard to score, hard to score, hard to scoreee

Goodness,
Never known a girl like you
Can't believe it
Your so hard to please, hard to please

Drive you crazy
My beautiful body,
You just won't spend the day here together

I know ya hate me
Just wanna kill me
Stand up
Knock me right out
So hard to score, hard to score, hard to scoreee

Oh byeeee
Girl you won't
Give me any time of the day
Give me any time of the day
Give me any time of the day
Give me any time of the day
Give me any time of the day
Give me any time of the day"

As the song finishes and the rest of the band walk of stage, the lead singer collapses to the floor, before revealing he wrote the song from a personal experience. He spends the next twenty minutes crying his eyes out until one of his fellow band members drags him off stage.

Falair: So, we've chosen a song, and so, now I think we should talk about how we do our voting. After all, we're in the contest, so we've got to take care of this somehow...

Salearis: So we talk about this now?

Falair: Yes. It's a good time. After all, the performances are almost done, and this Northern Southlander or whoever he is won't get off the stage anyway.

Salearis: Okay. Then I guess we do a vote or something like that...

Falair: Just a vote? Everyone's doing a vote. Is that all you can come up with?

Salearis: Look. It's hard for me to think right now. This WorldVision contest isn't what I expected it to be. Just look at the Wentland entry.

Falair: Still, I don't think doing a vote is all that great of an idea. It might be difficult to organise. And who know what kind of results we might get...

Salearis: Well, what do you propose we do then? Since you don't like my idea.

Falair: To tell the truth, I'm not to sure about it either. What songs do you thing should get a good amount of points?

Salearis: So you're saying we should decide ourselves? Okay, I say, maybe we should give a few points to the Magnus Valerius entry?

Falair: Magnus Valerius?

Salearis: Well, what else is there? We have only 14 songs here, not a list of 100 or more... Besisides, the guy is finally being dragged offstage. Let's wait till the voting starts.

The final song came from the hosts. It's set to this (http://www.zshare.net/audio/65355353e6f1d1/) melody.

--------


Step out in the morning into the bright sky
But before you know it the sun's waved goodbye
It's almost enough to make you want to cry
But will you?
Oh you see in rainclouds the end looming near
But before when they came they all disappeared
It should be enough to restore your old cheer
I'll tell you
Don't you cry

'Cause there's a voice of hope within
Every one of us
There's a fight out there to win
Inside all of us
And if self-doubt is fought away
There won't be another day
You can't get through
You won't think what could have been
If you trust
The voice of hope within

There's no such thing
As a dream beyond you
You enviously stare
At somewhere you belong to
But not while you turn away
Thinking it's no place for you to stay
That's why I shall say

That there's a voice of hope within
Every one of us
There's a fight out there to win
Inside all of us
And if self-doubt is fought away
There won't be another day
You can't get through
You won't think what could have been
If you trust
The voice of hope within


---------

VOTING OPEN!
Remember, the format is 1-2-3-4-5-6-7-8-10-12, with 12 for the best performance.

Jawalski: So, it's finally over. No more of these terrible songs, now we just have to go through the voting. And this time, present our country's votes. Yikes!

Wiadzase: Relax. It can't worse than the songs we've had to listen to. Besides, we can put on a show! I found some voluteers.

Jawalski: Really? Who are they?

Wiadzase: Well, they're a group of girls from that weird place across the street. Except it says in the deal that we're not supposed to reveal their names, gender, or any other such information.

Jawalski: Oh gods. This might make it hard. Maybe we should look somewhere else? Maybe we can talk about those last three songs?

Wiadzase: Okay, to start off, the Lyo, er, Scotchpinestan entry was a girl in front of a piano. Nothing special, we've had that last contest. I might give it a few points, but we're not deciding the points, we're just presenting them...

Jawalski: Still, I say it's good that we're not deciding the points. There's only two slots for zero points after all... what about Sorthern Northland?

Wiadzase: Well, I was surprised that a bunch of drunks went on stage and gave us something that sounded better than "Make her Bleed". Really, one of the best songs in the contest, and it's performed by a group of drunks.

Jawalski: They're Sorthern Northlanders. From what I know, those people might always be drunk, so it might by now have no effect on them...

Wiadzase: Let's stop with that here, sure it might be an actual statistic, but we're making fun of songs here, not countries. Sorthern Northland make good contributions to this contest after all. They give us break from the crap the other countries send. Remember last contest? They gave 3 minutes of silence. And here they give 20 minutes of silence after their song.

Jawalski: 20 minutes? Isn't that a bit over the time limit? How did he manage to stay on the stage for so long?

Wiadzase: We'll maybe the hosts just didn't know. He could have been there even longer, but he was dragged offstage by another bandmember.

Jawalski:Alright, and last we had Kura-Pelland. again. Why do they always have to be last?

Wiadzase: Well, as we both now, both their entries so far consisted of loud high-pitched screaming. The simple fact is, that the they believe that if they perform after a long list of pop songs, it might lessen the effect of their screaming and actually make their songs sound good.

Jawalski: And they think it works?

Wiadzase: Well, it might work for others, but it's wouldn't get them any extra points from me. Especially with how much silence we had, it felt almost like this was the first entry. I'm really still trying to get the horrible taste out of my mouth.

Jawalski: Alright then. Anyway, with all the songs being performed and Rejistania not participating, who do you think will win?

(silence)

"So out of the twelve countries we can vote for, five end in "land", and with one exception they're all fairly pathetic."

"I liked the hosts' performance, too."

"...I meant Wentland."

"...Wentland?"

"Yes! Willie was simply marvelous in his use of irony, creating expectations and following with brilliant plot twists. A truly profound piece of literary surprise."

"Too bad it got censored."

"What?! Didn't we just host the one about free speech?"

"Fluid time being what it is, only maybe. It was also available online if people really gave a rip."

"Did they?"

"We'll find out."

"Any pattern you want to point out, then, if the "land" suffix is too controversial?"

"Some of the ones that started with S were pretty good."

"Swilatia's was great, yeah, too bad no one will vote for it."

"Why not?"

"No one takes a stand offline-that's almost as profound as what Wentland had. But nobody's going to get it here because we have the same problem."

"Oh well. Let's get to the voting. In last place is...Rupert and Friends present Happy Smiley Songs Yay."

"What?"

"Something had to go during the Wentland timeslot."

"Just look at my bear/And look at me, bare?"

"Something like that. Also getting zero points is Wijaska Island."

"Mallatarsland is shut out as well."

"Bazalonia gets the first point-wasn't there someone from Zwangzug in the video clip?"

"Yeah, that's him, right there-staying out of trouble. Bo-ring."

"Two points to Alexandrian Ptolemais."

"Three that they don't deserve to Sorthern Northland."

"Four for Popay."

"How did this get up so high? The others were just worse, I guess."

"Five to Scotchpinestan."

"Six to Schnitzelfest-this could have won the vote."

"Told you so! Swilatia, seven."

"Enough with the alliteration."

"Eight for Khenas."

"That's just another stupid love song-two languages and it doesn't rhyme in either of them."

"There are online translation sites."

"Whatever. Ten points go to Kura-Pelland, for some reason."

"Which means twelve go to-"

Both announcers blurt, incredulously, "Magnus Valerius?!"

The one who spoke most recently finally says, "...hey, they're actually pretty good."

Magnus Valerius 12
Kura-Pelland 10
Khenas 8
Swilatia 7
Schnitzelfest 6
Scotchpinestan 5
Popay 4
Sorthern Northland 3
Alexandrian Ptolemais 2
Bazalonia 1

Okay, so, thanks for all the songs, it was a nice show, anyway, we called to give the results of the Khenas vote, not a jury this time, and here they are:

1 point goes to MALLATARSLAND!
2 points goes to BAZALONIA!
3 points, ZWANGZUG!
4 points, SCNITZELFEST!
5 points, POPAY!
6 points, SCOTCHPINESTAN!
7 points, KURA-PELLAND!
8 points, MAGNUS VALERIUS!
9 points, wait, no, there is no 9 points.
10 points, SWILATIA!

And our 12 points go to SORTHERN NORTHLAND!!!

Good Evening and here are the votes of the Mallatarsland panel

1 point Wijaska Island
2 points Popay
3 points Kura Pelland
4 points Alexandrian Ptolemais
5 points Khenas
6 points Sorthern Northland
7 points Scotchpinestan
8 points Bazalonia
10 points Zwangzug
12 points Wentland

'And now, it is us, Kura-Pelland, with our phone vote!'

In charge of this bit was, predictably, an anorexic chick. Corinne Young, her name was - a 24-year-old entertainment reporter for NTV News. She has an obnoxiously loud voice. Thank goodness she wasn't presenting the whole thing.

'We had over FIVE MILLION votes!' she cried. 'Amazing! And now your results!

Schnitzelfest, one point!' The hosts repeat this and each other one. It's not required really.

'Wijaska Island, two points!
Alexandrian Ptolemais, three points!
Magnus Valerius, four points!
Khenas, five points!
Sorthern Northland, six points!
Swilatia, seven points!
Bazalonia, eight points!
Zwangzug, ten points!
And the twelve... SCOTCHPINESTAN!! Thank you again for a great show!!'

And with that out of the way...


Scotchpinestan 30
Sorthern Northland 27
Swilatia 24
Magnus Valerius 24
Zwangzug* 23
Kura-Pelland* 20
Bazalonia 19
Khenas* 18
Wentland 12
Popay 12
Schnitzelfest 11
Alexandrian Ptolemais 9
Wijaska Island 3
Mallatarsland* 1

Those marked with asterisks have already voted,
and hence eligible for points from all ten remaining nations

Seizure, Scotchpinestan's entry in Worldvision 3, popped up on the video screen.

"Yeah, I enjoyed the show, but imagine if we were there this time instead of last time..."

"Good evening! We're Seizure, you may remember us from the last Worldvision contest. We are here to present the results of the Scotchpine televote."

"Zwangzug, one point.
Swilatia, two points.
Schnitzelfest, three points.
Popay, four points.
Wijaska Island, five points.
Alexandrian Ptolemais, six points.

Khenas, seven points.

Magnus Valerius, eight points.

Wentland, ten points.

And the big twelve point vote goes to...

Kura-Pelland!"

After this, lead singer Jack Uggla said a few more words, but they were drowned out by the deafening roar of the Kura-Pelland crowd.

This year, Stefan Jawalski, one of the Swilatian commentators, was selected to present the results of the Swilatian vote. Behind him was a group of girls, and... some buckets?

Jawalski: So, all the girls are here? Good. Let's Begin. Today, we will be representing the results of the Swilatian vote with buckets of water.

Fanaji (Wijaska Island): What do you mean? Don't tell us you're doing the same-

Jawalski "Oh, you'll see. One point goes to... WIJASKA ISLAND!"
(A bucket of icy water was thrown at Fanaji)

Fanaji: Aagh!! Why can't you just tell us what countries we are??

Marissa: Oh, I know what country I am, I'm Magnus Valerius. And who would vote for that kind of a song?

Emila (Bazalonia): I did. And so did all my friends.

Jawalski: Okay. I don't care. Two points go to... POPAY!
(Two buckets are thrown at Mirosława, or at least they were supposed to be, they missed)

Jawalski: Damn. Three Points go to... WENTLAND!
(three buckets fly over from the offscreen and hit Andela.)

Andela: You're giving points to Wentland? To Wentland?

Ursula (Schnitzelfest): Still feeling so confident, Marissa?

Marissa: Yeah. There's no way my country could get more than 3 points. Unlike yours, which might actually...

Jawalski: Four points go to... SCHNITZELFEST!

Ursula: AAGH! This is so cold!

Marissa: See?

Jawalski: Hey, Marissa Why don't just let me give the rest of the vote? Anyway, five points go to... ZWANGZUG!

Blanka (Zwangzug): Meh, Whatever.

Jawalski: Six Points go to... SCOTCHPINESTAN!
(The buckets went to Veronika, who at first stood tall with a "bring it on" mindset. However, the force of the water pushed her a few steps back, and the temperature was a bit cold for her liking)

Jawalski: Seven points go to... ALEXANDRIAN PTOLEMAIS!

Dusana (Alexandrian Ptolemais): Yikes!
(Dusana thought that her country might be one of the null-pointers, making her safe. However, it was not, and already felt cold after seeing all the cold water that was about to come at her)

Jawalski: Eight Points go to... KHENAS!
(Sarlaje, the Khenas girl was glad her home country got a high score, however, the same could not be said about the icy deluge headed in her general direction)

(By now, all the girls seemed nervous, afraid they might be the next ones to be hit. Well, all the girls except Marissa.)

Jawalski: Ten points go to... SORTHERN NORTHLAND!
(Lawrenty froze first in horror, and then literally, with all the water that was thrown at her)

Jawalski: And finaly, twelve buckets, er twelve points from Swilatia go to...
MAGNUS VALERIUS
(A vast tsunami was thrown at Marissa, knocking her down in disgust. Then she got back up, looking very angrily at the host.)

Marissa: What? You made these scores up just so you could do this to me, didn't you? I HATE YOU!

Emila: Oh, put it away.

Jawalski: So, yeah, those were the votes Swilatia. So, now the show-

(Marissa picks up some of the remaining buckets and tosses them at Jawalski as he signs of)

Jawalski: AAGH!! YOU GET OUT OF HERE RIGHT NOW!!
----
12 Magnus Valerius
10 Sorthern Northland
8 Khenas
7 Alexandrian Ptolemais
6 Scotchpinestan
5 Zwangzug
4 Schnitzelfest
3 Wentland
2 Popay
1 Wijaska Island
0 Bazalonia
0 Mallatarsland
0 Kura-Pelland

'And after six of the fourteen votes the standings are as follows!'


Magnus Valerius 44
Sorthern Northland 37
Scotchpinestan* 36
Khenas* 33
Kura-Pelland* 30
Zwangzug* 29
Swilatia* 26
Wentland 25
Alexandrian Ptolemais 22
Bazalonia 19
Popay 18
Schnitzelfest 18
Wijaska Island 9
Mallatarsland* 1

Those marked with asterisks have already voted,
and hence eligible for points from all eight remaining nations

'Magnus Valerius have danced into a significant lead, but can it last?'
'We'll find that out soon, and we go to our next vote now!'

bump

Jawalski: So did I miss any votes?

Wiadzase: No, just the standings. Why do you ask?

Jawalski: Well, there was this girl, marissa, who didn't take to kindly to seeing her country get 12 points. So, she picked up the remaining buckets and threw the water at me, and thus I had to lose some time for changing into some dry clothes. So, who's leading?

Wiadzase: Okay, here are these standings:

Magnus Valerius 44 Wentland 25
Sorthern Northland 37 Alexandrian Ptolemais 22
Scotchpinestan 36 Bazalonia 19
Khenas 33 Schnitzelfest 18
Kura-Pelland 32 Popay 17
Zwangzug 29 Wijaska Island 9
Swilatia 26 Mallatarsland 1

As you can see, Magnus Valurius is now-

Jawalski: Magnus Valerius is leading?

Wiadzase: Indeed, it's strange, as last time Lovisa was in the contest they got zero points. Still, at least Schnitzelfest, the other Lovisa from this year isn't very high up.

Jawalski: Indeed. And look at Mallatarsland down there with only one point. looks like their "singing donkey" coundn't even win the kiddie vote.

Wiadzase: Well, they might have won the kiddie vote in khenas, sonce that's were their only point so for comes from, but otherwise, yeah. They can't even impress the kind of people who would actually believe in talk, er, singing donkeys. And, Just above them, with only 9 points, is Wijaska Island, another song about things that don't exist. So maybe there might be an actual way to deter-

Jawalski: But our song, the closest thing to the other end of the spectrum, isn't really in first place right now is it?

Wiadzase: Well, I'm not really sure if it's that realistic when they complain about the most petty things. We should really just wait and see what it will be like at end of the contest. We're not even halfway there after all.

Jawalski: No, just one voting announcement before. But whatever. You never know who the remaining countries will give points to.

Salearis: So, here's an idea for the voting:

Falair: Yeah, what?

Salearis: Right, okay, so we have 4 sores: each of us, our entry last year, and the results of a televote, and we add them up. Then we put the results back into the WorldVision form, that is, 1 to 12, and submit that as the vote.

Falair: One Problem.

Salearis: Yeah?

Falair: We weren't in the contest last year. This is our first time.

Salearis: Oh. Right. Maybe our entry this year then?

Falair: I'm not too sure.

Salearis: Allright, maybe some-one else, but whoever is going to be the third vote, we should start putting our votes toghether, and open the televote...

Falair:...

Nattie Hentey, the Wentland MC, was standing stunned. Behind her were models and several buckets of ice-cold water, the models looking a bit grumpy, and several bucket bungers looking expectant. But the plan had been foiled by the Swilatian voting.

"What do we do?" hissed Nattie.

"Errr...I've got an idea..." whispered the producer, jotting something on a cue card. "Just read this."

Nattie complied. "Here are the votes from the Wentland jury...which will be graphically demonstrated by striping models..."

"STRIPPING!!! Oh jeez, GCSE bimbette..."

"OK, so one point, and one item of clothing removed, is...Scotchpinestan!"

Anjelica, the model representing Scotchpinestan, removed her shoe.

"Oh, one for the fetishists there...and two points go to...Sorthern Northland!"

Chiffon removed both of her shoes.

"Three points go to...Kura Pelland!"

Sapphire was not into foot photography, and, besides which, she had a bunion. So she removed her jacket, her bangle and a ring on her finger.

"Four points go to...Popay!"

The blonde bombshell Belinda decided that everyone was being a bit too coy, so after taking off her jacket she took off her t shirt, her left shoe and her miniskirt. And sat there proudly half-dressed.

"Five points go to...Khenas!"

Jemima removed both of her shoes, her watch, a necklace from around her shapely neck and a hair-clip, to let her auburn tresses dangle downwards.

"Six points go to...Wijaska!"

Amelia let out a whoop of delight, she could show off her new tattoo. So the first thing she took off was her sk8r armguard thing, revealing "I LUV U DAMIEN" on her forearm. A shame she had split up with him the day before. Next were her shoes and tights. She stopped, but Nettie, not stupid, motioned she should take something else off, and Amelia whipped off her baseball cap.

"Seven points go to...Zwangzug!"

Zoe had dressed as a businesswoman for this, hoping to get attention from any lawyers watching, so she removed her blazer, her tie, her blouse, her skirt, her shoes and claimed her briefcase counted as the seventh. "It's the same in French," she expounded.

"Eight points go to...Swilatia!"

Penelope was a little concerned, as she totted up what she was wearing, but somehow managed to preserve a little dignity. Thankfully she had added a tanktop just before going on stage, so that meant that she still had some covering when the last ring came off her finger. Albeit it was a bit cold in the studio, to the delight of the audience.

"Ten points go to...Bazalonia!"

Monica was used to this. She had kept it a secret, but she knew what to do. Off came shoes, tights, top, vest, miniskirt, ring, watch and scarf. She posed proudly in her bra and knickers as the cameraman nearly fainted.

"And twelve points go to...Magnus Valerius!"

Taryn gave a little shriek and ran off stage. Security tried to grab hold of her but fell over, which left them not feeling right tits.

"What do we do now?" mouthed Nattie at the producer.

"The show must go on, love..." yelled the producer in her ear.

Nattie therefore peeled off her WBC issue blazer, then her blouse, her ribbon around her neck, her skirt, her tights and her shoes. "How many's that?"

"Still need some more..."

She took off her bracelets. "No more jewellery...that's enough, surely?"

"No, two to go..."

"I've only got my underwear..."

"Exactly..."

Wijaska Island Voting:

Votes from Falair:
12 Kura-Pelland
10 Swilatia
8 Scotchpinestan
7 Zwangzug
6 Popay
5 Bazalonia
4 Alexandrian Ptolemais
3 Sorthern Northland
2 Magnus Valerius
1 Schnitzelfest
0 Khenas
0 Wentland
0 Mallatarsland

Votes from Salearis:

12 Scotchpinestan
10 Zwangzug
8 Sorthern Northland
7 Swilatia
6 Kura-Pelland
5 Magnus Valerius
4 Alexandrian Ptolemais
3 Schnitzelfest
2 Bazalonia
1 Wentland
0 Mallatarsland
0 Khenas
0 Popay

Votes from Random Worlds:
12 Popay
10 Magnus Valerius
8 Swilatia
7 Wentland
6 Sorthern Northland
5 Scotchpinestan
4 Alexandrian Ptolemais
3 Khenas
2 Bazalonia
1 Zwangzug
0 Schnitzelfest
0 Mallatarsland
0 Kura-Pelland

Votes from Televote:
12 Magnus Valerius
10 Khenas
8 Sorthern Northland
7 Swilatia
6 Scotchpinestan
5 Schnitzelfest
4 Popay
3 Kura-Pelland
2 Zwangzug
1 Bazalonia
0 Alexandrian Ptolemais
0 Mallatarsland
0 Wentland

Totals:
Swilatia 32
Scotchpinestan 31
Magnus Valerius 29
Sorthern Northland 25
Popay 22
Kura-Pelland 21
Zwangzug 20
Khenas 13
Alexandrian Ptolemais 12
Bazalonia 10
Schnitzelfest 9
Wentland 8
Mallatarsland 0

Final Results:
12 Swilatia
10 Scotchpinestan
8 Magnus Valerius
7 Sorthern Northland
6 Popay
5 Kura-Pelland
4 Zwangzug
3 Khenas
2 Alexandrian Ptolemais
1 Bazalonia
0 Schnitzelfest
0 Wentland
0 Mallatarsland

bump.

Telex World Vision Votes - Bazalonia

12pts - Khenas
10pts - Kura-pelland
08pts - Wentland
07pts - Wijaska Island
06pts - Zwnagzig
05pts - Swilatia
04pts - Schnitzelfest
03pts - Popay
02pts - Magnus Valerius
01pts - Mallatarsland
00pts - Alexandrian Ptolmais
00pts - Scotchpinestan
00pts - Sorthern Northland

OOC: That was all meant to capitalised but... something hapened

12 Swilatia
10 Scotchpinestan
8 Magnus Valerius
7 Sorthern Northland
6 Popay
5 Kura-Pelland
4 Zwangzug
3 Khenas
2 Alexandrian Ptolemais
1 Bazalonia

Jawalski: So, now that four more countries have voted, I think it might be time to see the standings again

Wiadzase: Alright. Here they are:

Magnus Valerius 74 Popay 36
Swilatia 63 Wentland 33
Scotchpinestan 57 Bazalonia 31
Khenas 56 Alexandrian Ptolemais 26
Kura-Pelland 55 Schnitzelfest 22
Sorthern Northland 53 Wijaska Island 22
Zwangzug 50 Mallatarsland 2

Wiadzase: As you can see, Magnus-

Jawalski: Magnus Valerius is still in the lead?

Wiadzase: Yup. it's pretty much set in stone now, that Magnus Valerius is going to win the contest. Unless us or Scotchpinestan get a few twelves, and there's not much time for this to happen, only four votes to go.

Jawalski: Well, we might be able to climb up, we got up from seventh place to second place quite quickly, maybe we might be able to make our way up to first place. You know, win the contest.

Wiadzase: Who knows. The votes can be so weird sometimes. For example take a look at the Wijaska Island votes and the Schnitzelfest votes. They are exactly the same! They both give 12 points to the same country, 10 points to the same country, and so on down to 1. And what makes it even more funny is that those two conries are tied right now, they both have 22 points.

Jawalski: Yeah. Just ahead of Mallatarsland with it's only 2 points.

Wiadzase: Indeed, I know I brought it up before, but I find it so funny to see their entry have so little points. So far into the vote and they only have 2 points.

Jawalski: Indeed, but it would be even funnier to see them finish with no points whatsoever, like Lovisa did in contest 2.

Wiadzase: Alright. But now, we should just wait for the next votes. You never know.

BREAKING NEWS

Desborough Donkey Shot Dead by Unknown Assailant

News has just reached us that the Mallatarsland entrant for Worldvision 4 has been assassinated. A statement from the local police force has confirmed that nobody has been arrested for this crime, but a Music lover is suspected.

Stay tuned for further developments

'Welcome back to WorldVision! The excitement is soaring as just four countries remain to reveal their votes! Will Magnus Valerius hold on to their lead?'

[bump]

gjfhfggggn

"Now then, you've seen all the acts, you've lived the horror of the other nations sober attempts and you've voted and now we get a model with an annoyingly loud and squeeky voice to tell everyone our results."

"Hiya!!!!!!!!!!"

"Take it away Miss Sorthern Northland, 19 years old, and single."

"Oh my God, wow this is so exciting, *giggles* can I say hi to my mum?"

"NO, now get on with it."

"Hiya, Mum, oh and Kate, and Laura, and Siobahn, and Sinead, and Lily and Adela and Hannah and all the girls. Love yah mwah."

"The results?"

"Oh I forgot about them, haha.
Hiya Trilan, love yah mwah.
This is Beningrad calling and these are the Sorthern Northland results.
Ooooaaah How exciting is this?
I'm on TV!!!!

One point goes to, Wijaska Island. Oh MY GOD, how scarey was their song?

The two points go to, Bazalonia. Ahh that guy was soooo cute as well.

Three points go to, Zwangzug. Oh MY GOD, that clock one, I was like What is that supposed to be? Is it like a clock or something?

Four points, Swilatia. Oh my God, that song was sooo politikal, BORING.

Five points, Scot.. Scotpinscth? That Laura girl with the piano. Soooo cute, and sooo true.

Six points to Kura-Pelland.*starts singing* If yooooooouuuuuu can'ttt trurrrsssssstttt. Oh MY GOD, I love that song *squels* I voted for it. Love yah Kura-Pelland mwah.

Seven points, Ka-ne-arse? Ken-arse? Ohhh Khenas*giggles* Love yah mwah.

Eight points goes to, Schnitzelfest. Oh my God those girls were so pretty.

Ten points to Magnus Valerius. Oh MY GOD, I love that song.

And our twevle points go to Mallatarsland. Oh MY GOD, what is with Sorthern Northland's obsession with donkey's? Llama's are soooo much cooler to be honest. *giggles*


-In the background-"Great that's the results done, now cut the bimbo off."

"That's all from Sorthern Northland, Byeeeeeeeeeeee *giggles*
Love yah Worldvision mw.............

bump.

OOC: I think it might be time to start sending out TG's now...

Sadly yes... :(

OOC: Sorry for being late... had an unreliable internet connection for a while.

IC:

Ivan Anchikov: "Well, ladies and folks tuning into Valerian Music Television... we have come to that point in time where we vote for the winner of the WorldVision Contest. The Imperial Academy has finished accumulating votes from all around The Grand Empire."

Pavila Malatova: "Yes. As we know, our very own DJ Isan and Viktoria Isanderova are currently receiving international fame and acclaim for their song - they currently are the top act in the WorldVision contest... and #1 on RaveRadio here in The Valerian Empire!"

Anchikov: "Indeed. But will this lead last? Maybe, maybe not - but regardless, the song is a hit at home and in some other countries in our region. I hear it's also making a splash in Kalmykstan on Mongol Tekno Grooves Radio - at spot #3 in that nation's Top 100."

Malatova: "Really? That's cool. That's techno-tastic!"

Anchikov: "Ssshh! Pavila, it looks like the Imperial Academician has arrived with the overall tallies for our nation's votes towards the WorldVision Contest!"

Viktoria Isanderova, in the distraction, comes on stage.

Imperial Academician: "Sir Anchikov, here are the results for the WorldVision Contest. Coming in at 1 vote..."

Viktoria Isanderova: "Hello Anchikov! You're looking handsome!"

Anchikov: "Oh....oh... oh... Viktoria..."

Anchikov looked flushed and fainted.

Malatova: "Don't worry - he may not say it outright, but my cohost here is a big fan of yours, Miss Isanderova."

Isanderova: "Now, as the Imperial Academician was saying, one point goes to the sexy vampire lord of Wijaska Island!"

Imperial Academician: "Their performance was most popular in the Magyar-speaking areas of the empire."

Malatova: "Magyars love their vampires, I suppose!"

Isanderova: "Two points goes to Bazalonia for their performance... er, in what language was it?"

Malatova: "I think it was in World Cup lingo."

Imperial Academician: "Well, it could have been like Khenas's, which was something like Portuguese, Polish, English, maybe some romancing with some Spanish."

Ivan Anchikov regains consciousness and shakes his head.

Imperial Academician: "Ahh, Sir Anchikov, nice to have you back!"

Isanderova: "Gaining three points from Magnus Valerius is Popay for their song about emos and preps."

Anchikov: "They must be different types of dumplings from Popay or something!"

Malatova: "Tasty dumplings named emos and preps? I wanna try some someday..."

Imperial Academician: "Four Points go to Scotchpinestan. A very moving song, I must add. I personally give it my seal of approval!"

Imperial Academician: "With five points from Magnus Valerius, is the performance from Alexandrian Ptolemais."

Anchikov: "That's a pretty good tune to chill out to."

Isanderova: "With six points, the performance from Southern Northland."

Anchikov: "Indeed it's hard to score sometimes."

Imperial Academician: "Seven points goes to Zwangzug."

Malatova: "Happy birfday!!! Happy bearday!!! Happy barfday!!! Happy boredday!!!"

Anchikov: "Settle down, Pavila! Have you been sneaking in some vodka on the set?!"

Malatova: "Err... maybe?"

Imperial Academician: "So long as it's Imperator Vodka, I'll have some of that!"

Malatova: "With 8 points is Wentland, with Look at My Cock!"

Isanderova: "I'll look at Wentland's cock anytime!"

Imperial Academician: "But countries don't have genitals..."

Anchikov: "Viktoria, would you look at-?"

Without warning and before Anchikov could finish, Isanderova pulls off a round-house kick in her high heels and cocktail dress, dropping Anchikov to the ground. She then resumes a casual, cool pose.

Isanderova: "With 10 points is Switatia!"

Imperial Academician: "They are a Slavic nation, yes?"

Malatova: "I think so... Slavs unite?"

Isanderova: "And taking the cake with 12 points is..."

Everyone: "Kura-Pelland with their performance, Voice of Hope Within by Katherine West."

Malatova: "...which is soon going to be a trance remix by DJ Isan. At least I hope so!"

Isanderova: "That concludes the results! I'll see you all on the airwaves!"

Isanderova blows a kiss and wanders off set while Anchikov wakes up.

Anchikov: "What... happened?"



12 Kura-Pelland
10 Swilatia
8 Wentland
7 Zwangzug
6 Southern Northland
5 Alexandrian Ptolemais
4 Scotchpinestan
3 Popay
2 Bazalonia
1 Wijaska Island
0 Schnitzelfest
0 Mallatarsland
0 Khenas

TelONE Telphone Voting-Popay

12 Points-Swilatia
10 Points-Wentland
8 Points-Bazalonia
7 Points-Kura-Pelland
6 Points-Sorthern Northland
5 Points-Mallatarsland
4 Points-Alexandrian Ptolemais
3 Points-Khenas
2 Ponts-Zwangzug
1 Point-Magnus Valerius

OOC:Rearly sorry about the late entry, I just haven't been online lately.

So who is winning

and why aint this thing over yet !!!

Our Schnitzelfest TV audience have had to put up with replay after replay of the performances with lame entertainment from the Schnitzelfest hosts to fill in the rest

And i think their stupid jokes and lack of sleep are getting to the hosts themselves

People across the country have been placing bets on which one would crack first

We must end this now ... :sniper:

((By my count, Magnus Valerius and Swilatia are tied))

OOC: Nope, current standings:

Swilatia 89 Wentland 51
Magnus Valerius 85 Bazalonia 43
Kura-Pelland 80 Popay 39
Khenas 66 Alexandrian Ptolemais 35
Scotchpinestan 66 Schnitzelfest 30
Sorthern Northland 65 Wijaska Island 24
Zwangzug 62 Mallatarsland 19

How many more results are we waiting on?

I think there's either one or two more...

just Alexandrian Ptolemais now...

So what happens if AP doesn't vote? It's been a while now...

I've been considering giving up on him, and frankly I am almost positive I will now.

Which could mean I get rid of votes for him, but then we have to add one more vote each which'll never happen...

Leaving it as it is - in which case, congratulations Swilatia! - is the easiest option...

...inactive for 15 days, I think he's left. I'll leave it as it is.

Congratulations Swilatia, winner of WorldVision 4!

Jawalski: Well, it's over now. All the voting is done, and now we have a whole year before we have to worry about this again.

Wiadzase: All the votes? What about Alexandrian Ptolemais? I don't think we've had a voting anouncement from them.

Jawalski: No, they did not submit one before the time limit, so the hosts decided to forget about them. This happened in the first contest with Skgorria, and it might have happened in the second as well, i'm not sure...

Wiadzase: So who won the contest then, Magnus Valerius, right? I'm quite sure a single vote woun't really be able to-

Jawalski: Nope, we won the contest.

Wiadzase: We... actually... won...? Never thought this could have happened, but I guess this is good.

Jawalski: Yeah, we are now a few points above them. Then in second place Magnus Valerius, third Kura-Pelland, and fourth, Khenas.

Wiadzase: And Mallatarsland last? Or have they gotten points now.

Jawalski: Still last. But he has 19 points now, not just 2.

Wiadzase: 19? They must have fallen for that publicity stunt, with the donkey being shot and everything. Come on, the donkey looked like he was going to die soon anyway.

Jawalski: Yeah, but he got what he deserved, last place. Unlke the Khenas entry, which somehow got into the top 4.

Last?

Last?

What do you mean we were last?

I wouldn't want to be in Desboroughs shoes.

Me neither, they shot him.

Actually, I haven't left; I have been busy with RL things, and my online time has been somewhat reduced. Anyways, congrats to the winners.