NationStates Jolt Archive

*(Or nearest equivalent. Or nearest unreasonable equivalent, really.)

The Anti-Government Hour radio broadcast

"...in celebration of the act to expand free speech-at least they can do something right-we have a selection of speakers of our own. Beginning with Professor Ivan Danzarov from some selective institution or another. Hello, Professor."

"Hello. It's an honor to be here."

"We're glad to have you. Can you quickly explain what's taken place in Zwangzug since the last executive election?"

"Unprecedented rates of population growth, followed by activity on the world stage and contact with nations of varying timescales."

"And what has that meant?"

"Absolute madness. By some accounts-probably from disreputable foreign sportniks-it's been over thirty years with one party in power. By others, it's just over one year."

"Can you theorize what might be behind this?"

The professor eagerly complies, getting cut off only when he gets to the square roots.

"I'm sorry, sir, but could you put that in layman-or, in these nauseatingly enlightened times, laywoman-or, without resorting to religious terminology-just dumb it down, okay?"

"Under new government, time dilate YOU!"

"Thanks for your time. However long it actually was. Next we have one of those, uh, sportniks themselves, pitcher Tobias Utopia. Hello there."

"Hi."

"How long passes between editions of whatever tournament you're in?"

"How should I know? I've only been in the one."

"Aren't you baseball freaks like obsessed with history and stuff?"

"Um, some of our statistics aren't even accessible-this one show preempted our broadcast."

As the host of the program tries to figure out why he invited Utopia on, someone else takes over. "Here now is noted economist @@RANDOMNAME@@-sorry, I mean Buy Dredd."

"Hello."

"How have the current administration's actions affected the economy?"

"They've totaled it. One day private enterprise is here, the next it's gone, the next it's here under ridiculous bureaucracies. There's only so many times you can ban Arms Manufacturing."

"That's led to another argument that the timeflow has been distorted: the government wouldn't necessarily outlaw an industry twice in five days. Perhaps matters of less consequence take place in between, without media knowledge?"

"You're the media, you tell me."

"Well...How about you tell us the downsides of such an economy?"

"It's ridiculous. Half the things people want to do are illegal, half of the remainder are impractical due to the number of subcommittees we have to go through, half of the rest are-this is just one of those infinite series jobs."

"Unbiased reports say that Zwangzug's citizens "enjoy great social equality". What do you make of this?"

"I'm sure not enjoying it."

"Would you consider the economy "fair", like neutral rankings do?"

"What is this, some sort of public radio piece?"

"Um...Let me see how our host is coming along."

The host sticks his head in front of the microphone to say, "Anyhow, the point is, the last time we had elections, the Composite Minister didn't even do anything. That wasn't a fair representation of the population's viewpoint. So...we need elections. Yeah."

"Coming up next on the Underground Element: how to get around in a subway. No, wait, that's not it..."

In an unsurprising decision, a bored national parliament reaffirmed its commitment to voluntary elections (see last week's Regency editorial). This right has been decisively upheld several times under the current administration, beginning shortly after the inauguration. More significant is the fact that United Nations officials, taking note of this, have now reclassified Zwangzug as a "Liberal" Democratic Socialist nation.

"It's an improvement, certainly," comments pundit Joy Leuning. "Being described as "patriotic" was beginning to get on my nerves."

The same faceless bureaucrats have also concluded that "the government gives [citizens] plenty of [elections]", prompting the inevitable questions as to when exactly the next Composite Minister will be voted on.

The parliament is currently creating yet another agency of uncertain purpose.

In a brief statement, the government formally announced that elections for the position of Composite Minister would be held in the near future.

Political parties will now begin the nominating process. Primary elections are held on a common date, regardless of party or electoral district, of which there are sixty. In both the primaries and general election, a system of instant runoff/preferential voting is employed: voters rank their candidates in order, with the candidate with the fewest first-place votes being eliminated and the second-place votes of those voters counted instead. That process continues until only one candidate is left.

While the major parties winnow their field, smaller parties will be working to ensure representation in the various districts, as each of the regions has its own qualifications for appearance. Around a dozen parties are expected to appear on the ballots of all sixty districts, with a smaller handful able to garner at least 10% of first-place votes in the initial round of balloting.

It is not known whether the incumbent will stand for reelection, but even such a race would likely be very close and heated. With the role of the executive office greatly increased, the election will certainly be considered a referendum on the country's recent direction.

In a short statement, the incumbent Composite Minister announced a lack of desire to seek reelection.

"Zwangzug has experienced a period of considerable change since I took office, including a notable increase in interaction with the broader multiverse beyond Starways Congress. Upon reflection on my leadership in the wake of the wider world, I have decided that it is in the best interests of myself and my nation to not stay in this office.

I will continue to work on behalf of my party, in the interests of continuing the policies I have pursued during my term. It is my personal hope that my dreams and hopes for this country coincide with that of its multitude of citizens: the trust that has been placed in me serves to indicate as much. I will continue to serve the rest of my term faithfully, and abide by the wishes of the electorate in regards to its future direction. My individual aspirations, however, will be most directly served by the election of someone who will follow my administration's precedent, an event to which I will aspire on a level unconnected with my executive rulings.

Given the beautiful nature of the world we have found ourselves in, I conclude that there are more qualified occupants of this office than myself, and I wish the best to all of them. Thank you, and good evening."

While the major parties discuss the bevy of potential candidates searching for the nomination, many smaller parties have already made consensus choices and are now striving to get on the ballot. Here's a look at three citizens who are giving it a shot.

Nathan Kearns' following in districts across the country is a worrying sign to many commentators. The new (or not-so-new, if some of the timeframe rumors are true) Isolationist Party doesn't have any wholly objectionable policies on the surface. In fact, the platform could hardly be simpler: Kearns advocates the simple and immediate withdrawal from the world stage, and has no opinion on matters of domestic and economic policies.

"The party's age shouldn't be held against us," says campaigner Crystal Albright. "There hasn't been a need for such an organization in the past. There is today."

One factor seen as an ideological problem is the utter lack of an economic direction. Deregulating commerce could undermine many of the Isolationists' goals: interaction with foreign businesses could prove just as disruptive as that with governments abroad. This may not be as catastrophic as the party makes it out to be, however: Zwangzug posts but five ambassadors beyond the region. (The whereabouts of a sixth is unknown, as the nation to which she was posted no longer exist: this is a favorite anecdote of isolationist fearmongers.) The country's only other official tie is that of an associate member of a dormant organization. Beyond that, all interaction is carried out through proxy groups that have no official state backing, and therefore are not subject to legislation.

Nevertheless, Kearns' rapid increase in popularity implies that the issues he raises will not be able to be avoided in the later campaign. It is projected that he will appear on the ballot in every district.

The Communist Party, nominating Ashleigh Quinn, is just as explicit about its goals. "Communism is easily misunderstood worldwide," she orated during a recent rally. "But nothing could be more in line with our beliefs."

She may have a point. Whether it's the Progressive Traditionalists viewing capitalism as something dangerous to be outlawed, the Liberal Conservatives taxing corporations to fund the environment, Coriolis and cohorts [infamous administration to whom Ms. Quinn would most likely not wish to be compared-ed.] spurring technological research for state ends, or the current administration alternatively illegalizing private enterprise or simply bogging it down amid endless bureaucracy, the free market has never really caught on.

"We're founded on the principles of power to the people," Quinn alliteratively intoned. "Communism represents the ultimate extension of that concept."

Criticism of communism, from those in Zwangzug who have figured out that it doesn't have to be brought with a bloody revolution, centers on the difficulties (or perceived impossibilities) for naturally skilled individuals to advance to prominence. The competitive nature permeating societal thought is tough to erase, and the current system is generally seen as being enough or more so to secure economic security for all.

Quinn currently appears on three of the sixty ballots. While this number will increase, she is unlikely to reach more than half of the districts.

And then there is Aaron Seaberg.

Before his platform is even considered, a glaring feature of his candidacy is the fact that he cannot vote. Although he passed the intelligence test necessary for enfranchisement last year, Seaberg, age 15, is several months shy of eligibility. But there are no limits on who can run for office, or serve within it.

Seaberg is the founder of the Digital Party, and advocates letting politicians work from home, voting by computer, in the hopes of increasing government efficiency. "The current outmoded rituals are a living monument to a dead past," translates one of his supporters from his official bln, cberg4cm.zz. "We don't have to become Plutoni in order to drastically tighten up the system." Seaberg says he didn't think about running until Nickel announced the race was open. "I admire the anonymity side, in some ways. I wouldn't want to evict someone like the incumbent." He has no strong platform for what legislation he would want to pass from his home in Passnet-a young idealist, he may be inclined to follow an extremist position.

The Digital Party has unsurprisingly harnessed the internet to unite widespread individuals who support Seaberg's policies. So widespread are they, in fact, that he has no concentration of supporters even in Passnet, and hasn't gotten on the ballot there or anywhere else. Which is a relief for many-few people will confess to actually wanting a teenager with a mouse behind the country. It is not, however, without allure.

In the wake of the government's newest absurd legislation, the primaries have been successfully held.

The interim laws are as controversial as ever: private enterprise has been outlawed yet again, followed shortly thereafter by a distinct denial of a feudal system, reinforcing citizens' ability to rise and fall on their own merits. Most recently, term limits have been abolished, leading observers to critique a drop in political freedoms.

"This is ridiculous," Herbert Clark compellingly argues: Clark is the sole representative of the Infinite Power Party in Parliament, and the party's nominee for Composite Minister. "By instating term limits, the government would have reduced the number of people eligible for public office. And they call that more freedom?" United Nations officials have now publicized that elected officials serve for decades in a single term, which proves either Clark's opponents or "disreputable foreign sportniks" with time dilation theories right.

With the next Minister likely to serve for a long time anyhow, pressure is on the parties to pick good nominees, and for the most part they appear to have done so. Felix Wainwright hopes to keep the incumbent party in power, while Marianne Hendricks becomes the Traditional Conservatives' first female nominee and Benjamin Callifour runs for the Liberal Conservatives. Joe Simpson is the Pragmatic Radicals' selection, Arne Dawson that of the Mental Asylum Party, and Vincent DePaul the Capitalism Now Party's choice. Chad Doptera is the consensus pick of the Libertarian Party "if I'm not too lazy to apply".

The race is on.

Zwangzug is currently considered to have moderate personal and political freedoms, and low economic freedoms. More specifically, its civil rights are considered "good", its economy "fair", and its political freedoms "excellent". How would the various parties change this if they took power? (Only the parties of the current Parliament members are included.)

*Liberal Conservative Party
-Personal freedom: decrease. The LCs support mandatory vegetarianism and similar movements. Unless you're a zebra. THen you can have all the rights you want.
-Economic freedom: decrease
-Political freedom: no change

*Progressive Traditionalist Party
-Personal freedom: decrease
-Economic freedom: decrease
-Political freedom: decrease
If it moves, ban it. If it doesn't move, ban it anyway.

*Pragmatic Radical Party
-Personal freedom: no change
-Economic freedom: no change
-Political freedom: decrease

*Mental Asylum Party
-Personal freedom: decrease
-Economic freedom: decrease
-Political freedom: no change
Like the LCs, the MAs support government interference to focus on the single issue they hold dear.

*Capitalism Now Party
-Personal freedom: increase, to allow for the sale and transport of more goods. This distinguishes them from the Troglodyte Coalition, with which they have been (unfairly) confused, chiefly by the writer of a wiki article (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/list_of_political_parties_in_zwangzug.html) that can't be updated at the moment.
-Economic freedom: increase (unsurprisingly)
-Political freedom: no change

*National Socialist Grammarian Writers' Party
-Personal freedom: no change
-Economic freedom: no change
-Political freedom: theoretically no change, seeing as they're already in power. However, actions in the name of increasing political freedoms (such as outlawing term limits) have backfired. It is believed that the party would prefer a genuine increase in political freedoms, if only to get the "fiercely patriotic" business off the country's page.

*Infinite Power Party
-Personal freedom: no change
-Economic freedom: no change
-Political freedom: decrease

*Libertarian Party
-Personal freedom: increase
-Economic freedom: increase
-Political freedom: increase

Besides these parties, Nathan Kearns' Isolationists have already made it onto the ballots in every district. They would support decreasing political freedom (that is, the freedom of the government to interact with others) while not taking much of a position on any other issue.

With filing deadlines closing, ten candidates have made it onto the ballot in all sixty districts: the above as well as Holly Colvin, of the Birthday Party.

The candidates are fielding questions during debates, some of which will appear below as the campaign progresses.

"What is your view of the Starways Congress?"
Nathan Kearns: "It is a useful organization and one I from which I would not support Zwangzug's withdrawal. Being a member of the Congress has allowed the state a more appropriate role on the international scene than its previous status as an entity in a vast region."

One final bit of news has absolutely no impact on politics at all, yet may deserve mention. After rumors that the capital would be renamed Variableanopolis, the normal denunciation of capital as an arbitrary bourgeoisie construct boiled over into a full-blown debate, with the lowercase "abc" becoming a serious consideration. (Linguistic disputes between the unnecessarily compact and the pretentiously polysyllabic have been an unfortunate trend in Zwangzug.) The intermediate choice of "Zwischen" was finally adopted.

Due to the recent violence in Zwischen, a time-dilation process has been employed to put a seemingly capable leader in charge. The election happened, Wainwright won, same policies, hopefully more competence.

This thread will probably be used for further political updates barring more media apathy.