NationStates Jolt Archive

Many people, not familiar with the rich and varied history of the Rogue Nation of Chemisele, seem to think that we are not serious about our appreciation of the great and mighty Tire Iron, mightiest of wild Chemiseli beasts. I, Renee Maxine Chemisele, will not stand for this disrespect any longer. We will require an apology within a fortnight for these offenses, or the full might of the Chemiseli Republican Guard, ten dozen strong, will be brought down upon your houses.

Sincerely,
Madame Chemisele

An apology from whom? Everyone who has ever made fun of a tire iron in the history of the world?


-Elisa Day
Speaker for the Oligarchy
The Federated Technocratic Oligarchy of the Most Glorious Hack

Elisa Day,

Yes. Every single one of them. This has gone on far too long, and we are no longer standing for it. I give the world one week before the CRG, twenty dozen strong, is brought against them. Starting with 'Hack'.

Madame Renee Maxine Chemisele
Great Lady of Chemisele, Beloved by her subjects
The Rogue Nation of Chemisele

p.s.: We will also accept a million funbuxx in lieu of apologies.

Hm. As our military is is roughly the size of your entire nation, I think I'll simply ignore your threats.


-Elisa Day
Speaker for the Oligarchy
The Federated Technocratic Oligarchy of the Most Glorious Hack

Official Communique From The Skgorrian Foreign Ministry

We find the Chemisele proposal to be laughable, especially given their weakness. They might brag about their vaunted Chemiseli Republican Guard who stand at a paltry ten dozen strong, yet this is nothing compared to the armed forces of Skgorria, let alone the international community.

Tire Irons are the lose, National Socialism is the win

Madame Chemisele, your proposal is pomposterous, and as such Our Royal Monarch the wise King Jonathan I wants to send his sincere condolencies to the por people of your nation for suffering such a fool as you as their head of state.

Yours sincerely, Lord Amarideous, Head Scrib to the King.
LORD KING JONATHAN I OF THE ROYAL KINGDOM OF OUT OF YOUR MIND SPICY. KEEP IT SPICY! ALL HAIL KING JONATHAN I!

The President of the Sacricity could barely contain his laughter when he received the response.

"Oh brother. These guys cannot be serious."

"I am afraid they are my liege. They want an apology."

"They will not get one. Let that guard of theirs of 120 people come down on our house."

"Very well my lord."

To: offended nation
From: Theocracy of Lancaster County

No appology forthcoming.

To the Most Revered and Illustrious Leader of Leaders, Madame Chemisele:
From Eulalia Haarvanisen, Selected First Speaker of Freedominium, 2065

Speaking for Freedominium, an unarmed island nation, I, Eulalia Haarvanisen, as First Speaker and representative of the gathered interests of the National Forum that is the voice of the people of Freedominium, and of the National Wiki that is the brain of the nation, do so humbly apologise for any grievance or insult that you may have felt in any of our prior dealings. We wish that no ill-feeling exist between our nation and any other nation.

With humblest of apologies, I beg you for forgiveness in the name of the people of Freedominium, and entreat with great submissiveness and candor that you do not send your troops to destroy us. I also report most humbly to your gracious majesty that a goodwill package has been sent from Freedominium to your nation, of medical supplies, tapes of scientific data which we give freely to you, and many other useful household items. I hope that this small gesture may be enough to placate your ire.

Your servant,
Eulalia Haarvanisen

Dear Friend,

While you are a tiny nation i suggest you lie low. Im just offering adive. I dont know what cruel nation would attack such a tiny nation as yours anyway!

Lancaster Country you made me laugh with that reply

From,
King Daniel II of the Kingdom of Danno10
Current Population 407 Million

To the wise, intelligent, benevolent Eulalia Haarvanisen:

Thank you very much for your kind gestures and willingness to avoid insult with gifts. In exchange, we will send you five of the Tire Irons from my very menagerie.

Sincerely,
Madame Chemisele

To King Daniel and the other aggressors:

To ignore grievance while you are small means that you will accept grievances when you are large. This nation did not get to where it is today by allowing petty things like 'religious tolerance' or 'acceptance of alternative viewpoints' to flourish. If my predecessors had even thought of that, Chemisele would be a small crater in the middle of the South Pacific.

Sincerely,
Madame Chemisele

How very foolish of you. Eventually your people will rise in rebellion against your tyrant ways. Come, attack us. And die.

Chemisele, you have not yet responded to our messege. We would like a response.

To Chemisile;

We were not being agressive, Just offering advice

Prime Minister Gerald Swaffam, Of the Kingdom of Danno10 and the colony of Genky