Roania
25-05-2006, 15:54
"Target is moving. I repeat. Target is moving." The man spoke into his wristwatch, holding it close to his lips. He was dressed casually in a black and blue ensemble. "Come in, command?" He shook his watch firmly. "Damn thing is broken." He remarked to the woman sitting next to him.
She sighed, opened her mouth, closed it, opened it again, and then smacked him up the back of the head. "Your mere existence is an offence to sanity, life, and the Divine Imperium that's chosen to employ you." She managed, smoothing out the rumple in her red shirt.
"How do you figure, Diane?"
"First. You're speaking far too closely into it. If anyone was listening, they'd get deafened by that tenor of yours." She hit him again. "Second. You didn't think to turn it on." She hit him a final time. "And finally, you don't have the communicator."
"I don't?"
"No, Denis. I have it. And you are an idiot." She lifted her pendant to her lips, blew on it softly, and then held it back a couple of inches. "Command, come in." Nothing happened. "Command?" Diana shook the stone repeatedly. "Blasted device!" She ripped the pendant from her neck and threw it against the wall. "Come on, let's find..."
Come in? Agents, come in?
"Diana! It's command, they heard us!" Denis leapt to his feet and ran to the wall where she had disposed of the device. "Where'd it go?" He started searching for it.
Agents! There was a communication breakdown! Inform us immediately of the suspect's location! Have you pursued?
"Denis, stop jumping around! You'll crush it!"
Crush what? Agents! Come in! Respond! You... There was a sound a lot like 'Crunch'.
Diane gritted her teeth. "Denis, you clumsy..."
"Don't you call me clumsy! If you hadn't thrown it against the wall, we wouldn't have this problem!"
"If you hadn't made me angry, I might not have done it!" Any further argument was silenced by the tremendous explosion that incinerated them both.
Adriano, Commander of the Shadow Angels, was not a man easy to anger. He normally combined serenity with perfect efficiency, and for him to lose his temper was a special occasion. For Diane and Denis, then, it was as if all their Christmases had come at once. Not that they appreciated how 'lucky' they were. "In 1000 years, no one ever scored as low as you two." He slammed his fist into his desk. "And that's only the first offence."
Diane opened her mouth. Adriano reached up and with a perfect smile flashed one of his rings. Her mouth worked, but no words came out. "None of that." The Commander said, brightly. "Now, let's check the record... You lost a recon balloon. Twice. Damaged a priceless Rudanii vase. Ran through a year's worth of funds in a day and a half."
"Sir..."
"Not finished yet, Officer Denis." Adriano snarled. "You lost sight of the Princess, leaving her without any security presence on her date."
"Sir, as we said in the report, Princess Ailis knocked us unconscious and stuffed us in a..." Denis flushed slightly, realising that might not have been the best thing to say.
"How does that make it better?" Adriano demanded. "And to top it all off, when we finally send you through a test designed to check how you handle stress and what methods you choose to use to succeed, you fail. No one has ever failed. Not until now. I've been looking forward to this moment for a long time, officers. Turn in your badg..."
"Sir, could we get another chance?"
"WHAT?" Adriano demanded. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ANOTHER CHANCE?!" He roared at the top of his lungs, his face turning red. "HOW DARE YO...A...AAUGH...M-MY HEA..." He collapsed to the ground, clutching his chest and spasming. Finally his eyes rolled back in his head before their stunned eyes.
Denis just kept staring. "He...he died... Diane, what do we do?!"
Diane looked at their permanent record, and then at the disentegrator by the wall. "I know exactly what we're going to do." She fed the folder through the disentegrator's beams, watching it turn to dust. "Now if you find me a blank folder, we're going to go from zero to hero in 80 seconds."
"But...but this is illegal! We became Shadow Angels to serve the Imperium! To work in the cause of justice! To help make our nation a safer place!"
"Yes. And?"
"Oh, nothing." He took Adriano's keys and went to find a blank record-folder. "What do we do about the Boss?"
Diane looked behind her at the disentegrator. "Stop me if you've heard this one..."
She sighed, opened her mouth, closed it, opened it again, and then smacked him up the back of the head. "Your mere existence is an offence to sanity, life, and the Divine Imperium that's chosen to employ you." She managed, smoothing out the rumple in her red shirt.
"How do you figure, Diane?"
"First. You're speaking far too closely into it. If anyone was listening, they'd get deafened by that tenor of yours." She hit him again. "Second. You didn't think to turn it on." She hit him a final time. "And finally, you don't have the communicator."
"I don't?"
"No, Denis. I have it. And you are an idiot." She lifted her pendant to her lips, blew on it softly, and then held it back a couple of inches. "Command, come in." Nothing happened. "Command?" Diana shook the stone repeatedly. "Blasted device!" She ripped the pendant from her neck and threw it against the wall. "Come on, let's find..."
Come in? Agents, come in?
"Diana! It's command, they heard us!" Denis leapt to his feet and ran to the wall where she had disposed of the device. "Where'd it go?" He started searching for it.
Agents! There was a communication breakdown! Inform us immediately of the suspect's location! Have you pursued?
"Denis, stop jumping around! You'll crush it!"
Crush what? Agents! Come in! Respond! You... There was a sound a lot like 'Crunch'.
Diane gritted her teeth. "Denis, you clumsy..."
"Don't you call me clumsy! If you hadn't thrown it against the wall, we wouldn't have this problem!"
"If you hadn't made me angry, I might not have done it!" Any further argument was silenced by the tremendous explosion that incinerated them both.
Adriano, Commander of the Shadow Angels, was not a man easy to anger. He normally combined serenity with perfect efficiency, and for him to lose his temper was a special occasion. For Diane and Denis, then, it was as if all their Christmases had come at once. Not that they appreciated how 'lucky' they were. "In 1000 years, no one ever scored as low as you two." He slammed his fist into his desk. "And that's only the first offence."
Diane opened her mouth. Adriano reached up and with a perfect smile flashed one of his rings. Her mouth worked, but no words came out. "None of that." The Commander said, brightly. "Now, let's check the record... You lost a recon balloon. Twice. Damaged a priceless Rudanii vase. Ran through a year's worth of funds in a day and a half."
"Sir..."
"Not finished yet, Officer Denis." Adriano snarled. "You lost sight of the Princess, leaving her without any security presence on her date."
"Sir, as we said in the report, Princess Ailis knocked us unconscious and stuffed us in a..." Denis flushed slightly, realising that might not have been the best thing to say.
"How does that make it better?" Adriano demanded. "And to top it all off, when we finally send you through a test designed to check how you handle stress and what methods you choose to use to succeed, you fail. No one has ever failed. Not until now. I've been looking forward to this moment for a long time, officers. Turn in your badg..."
"Sir, could we get another chance?"
"WHAT?" Adriano demanded. "WHAT DO YOU MEAN, ANOTHER CHANCE?!" He roared at the top of his lungs, his face turning red. "HOW DARE YO...A...AAUGH...M-MY HEA..." He collapsed to the ground, clutching his chest and spasming. Finally his eyes rolled back in his head before their stunned eyes.
Denis just kept staring. "He...he died... Diane, what do we do?!"
Diane looked at their permanent record, and then at the disentegrator by the wall. "I know exactly what we're going to do." She fed the folder through the disentegrator's beams, watching it turn to dust. "Now if you find me a blank folder, we're going to go from zero to hero in 80 seconds."
"But...but this is illegal! We became Shadow Angels to serve the Imperium! To work in the cause of justice! To help make our nation a safer place!"
"Yes. And?"
"Oh, nothing." He took Adriano's keys and went to find a blank record-folder. "What do we do about the Boss?"
Diane looked behind her at the disentegrator. "Stop me if you've heard this one..."