Kwazistan
11-02-2006, 21:47
The press conferess is over and a large, muscular yet tired man retires from the hall and into the pleasant and decorated room that is his office. He sits behind his desk and ties his long grey hair back to keep it away from his eyes. He presses the start button of his computer and scraches his beard impatiently as he waits for the computer to start up. Soon his fingers drop on the keyboard and he starts to write.
11th of February
Today I, Emperor-Pope Ragnar Benedictus II the Great, was presented with yet more intriguing issues. I was informed that a Nazi party was about to hold a demonstration tomorrow. The decision on this action was simple for my divine mind. There will be no nazi rally. Nothing personal, but the laws a law: No demonstrations unless they support the One True God, I. I hope they will be executed for their foolishness.
Then there was this other issue, which was difficult even for my celestial powers. The nudists want more freedom. On one hand, I love watching naked people, especially women. But then I realised that not every lady is gorgeous, and not every man possesses a great body like mine, that even Thor is jealous of. If I could only force the beautiful people to stay naked and the ugly to get dressed...
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.
"You may enter." Ragnar said. A tall and nervous looking man wearing a grey suit entered. Ragnar didn't recognise him, which made him suspicious. He moved his hand close to the alarm button and the other to his weapon. "I don't recognise you. Who are you?"
"Your highness, I am..." Highness?, Ragnar thought. But every Kwazi knows that the Emperor-Pope is to be addressed as divinity. This man is an assassin!
In less than a second Ragnar's hand had pressed the alarm button, but just to make sure that help came, he shouted:
"Guards! Assassin!"
The suit wearing man obviously knew that he had been revealed and he reached for his pocket, no doubt reaching for a weapon. Luckily, Ragnar had already grabbed his Rat-flail and jumped over the table, while his personal guards had burst through the door toting weapons. After a short moment of excessive violence, the would-be assassin was dead.
"Your divinity, are you alright? Were you hurt?" one of the bodyguards asked.
"I'm a god, I cannot be hurt. Now tear his body to pieces and send some of them to Cazareznia."
"Yes, your divinity."
Cazareznia. It was quite surprising that that small insignificant nation would declare a war on Kwazistan. Nevertheless, the great nation of Kwazistan and the pitiful 'nation' of Cazareznia have been at war for the last few days. Military advisors cannot say for sure which side has the upper hand, but Kwazistan has the advantage of being the best nation in the world which will eventually bring us victory.
And now, I must stop writing, for there's a good program on the TV. Good thing I decided that minorities must be represented on the television, I just love the jokes about them.
OOC: Hello all, this is my sort of introductory post to these forums and also a place for me to write about stuff in my country. This thread will also serve as a place of meetings, golf games, diplimacy and all the other jibbajabba that is part of foreign politics. I'll also probably make a thread for the Kwazistan-Cazareznia War soon-ish, so please, don't make any war-posts here. If you do, Baby-Jesus will cry and send an Intercontinental Ballisitic Missile to your house.
So once again: Hello!
11th of February
Today I, Emperor-Pope Ragnar Benedictus II the Great, was presented with yet more intriguing issues. I was informed that a Nazi party was about to hold a demonstration tomorrow. The decision on this action was simple for my divine mind. There will be no nazi rally. Nothing personal, but the laws a law: No demonstrations unless they support the One True God, I. I hope they will be executed for their foolishness.
Then there was this other issue, which was difficult even for my celestial powers. The nudists want more freedom. On one hand, I love watching naked people, especially women. But then I realised that not every lady is gorgeous, and not every man possesses a great body like mine, that even Thor is jealous of. If I could only force the beautiful people to stay naked and the ugly to get dressed...
Suddenly, there was a knock on the door.
"You may enter." Ragnar said. A tall and nervous looking man wearing a grey suit entered. Ragnar didn't recognise him, which made him suspicious. He moved his hand close to the alarm button and the other to his weapon. "I don't recognise you. Who are you?"
"Your highness, I am..." Highness?, Ragnar thought. But every Kwazi knows that the Emperor-Pope is to be addressed as divinity. This man is an assassin!
In less than a second Ragnar's hand had pressed the alarm button, but just to make sure that help came, he shouted:
"Guards! Assassin!"
The suit wearing man obviously knew that he had been revealed and he reached for his pocket, no doubt reaching for a weapon. Luckily, Ragnar had already grabbed his Rat-flail and jumped over the table, while his personal guards had burst through the door toting weapons. After a short moment of excessive violence, the would-be assassin was dead.
"Your divinity, are you alright? Were you hurt?" one of the bodyguards asked.
"I'm a god, I cannot be hurt. Now tear his body to pieces and send some of them to Cazareznia."
"Yes, your divinity."
Cazareznia. It was quite surprising that that small insignificant nation would declare a war on Kwazistan. Nevertheless, the great nation of Kwazistan and the pitiful 'nation' of Cazareznia have been at war for the last few days. Military advisors cannot say for sure which side has the upper hand, but Kwazistan has the advantage of being the best nation in the world which will eventually bring us victory.
And now, I must stop writing, for there's a good program on the TV. Good thing I decided that minorities must be represented on the television, I just love the jokes about them.
OOC: Hello all, this is my sort of introductory post to these forums and also a place for me to write about stuff in my country. This thread will also serve as a place of meetings, golf games, diplimacy and all the other jibbajabba that is part of foreign politics. I'll also probably make a thread for the Kwazistan-Cazareznia War soon-ish, so please, don't make any war-posts here. If you do, Baby-Jesus will cry and send an Intercontinental Ballisitic Missile to your house.
So once again: Hello!