Chaotium
30-01-2006, 16:24
Chaotic News Network (CNN)
Chaotikopolis, Democratic Kingdom of Chaotium
The Chaotian department of Foreign Relations, Tourism, and PR is proud to announce that Chaotium has finished work on its first space rocket to date.
The rocket, type 0001-SCRP, affectionally nicknamed the SS Deathtrap, is a construction made out of recycled materials such as abandoned car parts and used drink cans. It is only some nine meters tall, and the makers refused to give any information on what lies inside.
"I'll admit it's a bit small" , says project leader Vincent Kurnaff, "but that's just to prevent it from falling over. We are all very excited to present the result of our work, as we've been working on it for...eh...two months."
When asked when they intend to launch it, Vincent shuffles from foot to foot.
"There's the clinch. You see, we are still developing a fuel that will propel it into space. With proper governmental funding however, along the lines of a few milliard each year, I am confident we will be able to launch it sometime before 2048. This gives us plenty of time to recruit and properly train idio---brave men who seek to be the crew, as animal rights activists will prolably sling spoiled vegetables and fecal matter at us if we try it with animals."
When asked on his opinion, king Chaotik II of Chaotium said:
"Well, they're easy to please. Give them some scrap materials, workspace and a dental plan and you won't hear from them until they need more scrap materials. It is necessary to keep our scientists appeased, because otherwise they'd start making far too much things that go boom. There are more than enough things that go boom out in the world nowadays. Of course, if they WOULD make things that go boom we would see to it that they wouldn't get out in the world. And we will definitely not use them for ourselves." His Democratic Majesty nodded furiously at this.
Prime Minister Jonathan Avegh added the following:
"We certainly hope that this will ease up our struggling foreign relations a bit. Once it is obvious that not all of us are idiots who are barely beyond the opposable-thumbs stage, we hope that people will want more to do with us in a nonhostile way. Just in case, however, we're still keeping the defences."
Chaotikopolis, Democratic Kingdom of Chaotium
The Chaotian department of Foreign Relations, Tourism, and PR is proud to announce that Chaotium has finished work on its first space rocket to date.
The rocket, type 0001-SCRP, affectionally nicknamed the SS Deathtrap, is a construction made out of recycled materials such as abandoned car parts and used drink cans. It is only some nine meters tall, and the makers refused to give any information on what lies inside.
"I'll admit it's a bit small" , says project leader Vincent Kurnaff, "but that's just to prevent it from falling over. We are all very excited to present the result of our work, as we've been working on it for...eh...two months."
When asked when they intend to launch it, Vincent shuffles from foot to foot.
"There's the clinch. You see, we are still developing a fuel that will propel it into space. With proper governmental funding however, along the lines of a few milliard each year, I am confident we will be able to launch it sometime before 2048. This gives us plenty of time to recruit and properly train idio---brave men who seek to be the crew, as animal rights activists will prolably sling spoiled vegetables and fecal matter at us if we try it with animals."
When asked on his opinion, king Chaotik II of Chaotium said:
"Well, they're easy to please. Give them some scrap materials, workspace and a dental plan and you won't hear from them until they need more scrap materials. It is necessary to keep our scientists appeased, because otherwise they'd start making far too much things that go boom. There are more than enough things that go boom out in the world nowadays. Of course, if they WOULD make things that go boom we would see to it that they wouldn't get out in the world. And we will definitely not use them for ourselves." His Democratic Majesty nodded furiously at this.
Prime Minister Jonathan Avegh added the following:
"We certainly hope that this will ease up our struggling foreign relations a bit. Once it is obvious that not all of us are idiots who are barely beyond the opposable-thumbs stage, we hope that people will want more to do with us in a nonhostile way. Just in case, however, we're still keeping the defences."