Orthodozia
05-01-2006, 15:09
Are you tired of over crowded cities and beaches for vacation spots?
Are you sick of being hassled by beggars and over eager merchants in seedy bazaars?
Are you concerned about exposing your family to disease, strife, and potential immorality?
Have you considered Orthodozia as a your next holiday destination?
Orthodozia, home of beautiful smiles and pain-free feet!
Orthodozia, where roving gangs and public nudity are no longer a problem!
Orthodozia, jewel of the north pacific!
Enjoy our beautiful beach and lush rainforest. Sit on our hammock and watch the dog play. Visit our library/museum and learn about our (so-far) uneventful history. Take a walk through the beautiful avenue or laze on the green grass of the Central Plaza. Why not take a short tour of our parliament building, and watch a bill become a law!
Orthodozia, where bliss doesn't have to be expensive, dangerous, or inconvenient.
If you choose to visit Orthodozia, please remember to obey local laws:
* No importation, exportation, expectoration or ingestation of walnuts
* No music after 6
* No music before 6
* Do not feed the dog
* Do not not feed the dog
* Do not make eye contact with any citizen of the female persuasion (including the dog)
* Do not talk to any citizen of the female persuasion
* Do not talk to any citizen not of the female persuasion, or make eye contact there-with
* Obey all road safety signs
* Look all three ways before crossing the road
* Don't walk on the grass
* One person per hammock per day, not per haps
* No Photography of any description at any time or any location - we like our souls where they are, thank you very much
* No tourists
Orthodozia - you don't have to have three wives, seven offspring, three acres of habitable land and at least forty goats to live here, but it sure helps!
(Please Note: All applicants for permanent residency must have at least three wives, seven offspring, three acres of habitable land and at least forty goats before application will be processed - 12 offspring guarantees voting rights!)
Are you sick of being hassled by beggars and over eager merchants in seedy bazaars?
Are you concerned about exposing your family to disease, strife, and potential immorality?
Have you considered Orthodozia as a your next holiday destination?
Orthodozia, home of beautiful smiles and pain-free feet!
Orthodozia, where roving gangs and public nudity are no longer a problem!
Orthodozia, jewel of the north pacific!
Enjoy our beautiful beach and lush rainforest. Sit on our hammock and watch the dog play. Visit our library/museum and learn about our (so-far) uneventful history. Take a walk through the beautiful avenue or laze on the green grass of the Central Plaza. Why not take a short tour of our parliament building, and watch a bill become a law!
Orthodozia, where bliss doesn't have to be expensive, dangerous, or inconvenient.
If you choose to visit Orthodozia, please remember to obey local laws:
* No importation, exportation, expectoration or ingestation of walnuts
* No music after 6
* No music before 6
* Do not feed the dog
* Do not not feed the dog
* Do not make eye contact with any citizen of the female persuasion (including the dog)
* Do not talk to any citizen of the female persuasion
* Do not talk to any citizen not of the female persuasion, or make eye contact there-with
* Obey all road safety signs
* Look all three ways before crossing the road
* Don't walk on the grass
* One person per hammock per day, not per haps
* No Photography of any description at any time or any location - we like our souls where they are, thank you very much
* No tourists
Orthodozia - you don't have to have three wives, seven offspring, three acres of habitable land and at least forty goats to live here, but it sure helps!
(Please Note: All applicants for permanent residency must have at least three wives, seven offspring, three acres of habitable land and at least forty goats before application will be processed - 12 offspring guarantees voting rights!)