NationStates Jolt Archive


The Genesis of Cocainistan

Cocainistan
02-01-2006, 07:35
"Live in accordance with the Democratic Socialist lifestyle," the poster read.

A sign of the times in Cocainistan.

Nobody knew what was going on, these were violent times. The country's government was deposed, reinstated, deposed, murdered, deposed again, and reinstated. By the end of that they were decomposing mounds of goo, but that didn't stop them from being deposed yet again.

For a country with such an unfortunately coincidental name, it was sure fitting the bill.

But finally, a stable government came out of that. The new name reflected that. The Oppressed Peoples of Cocainistan. Nobody knew why it was spelled out in such blatant manner, but it looked here to stay. The government were openly militaristic. They spent ungodly sums of money on the latest new toys for their army. What army there was. It didn't take much to equip an army of at most 500,000, but they had the latest in gizmos.

You never know when you might need it.

Oppression or no oppression, the people loved their government for some reason. Maybe they put something in the curry, but they were loved.

The reason for the name Cocainistan? Nobody knew. Cocaine was unheard of in the small country. Crack pipe, the currency of Cocainistan, is an indiginous word meaning "money". The pink elephant is native only to Cocainistan.

((I'm out of creativity for 1:30 in the morning.))
Northern Sushi
02-01-2006, 07:52
To: The Government of Cocainistan

We will help your nation, but only if you join The Northern Sushi Commonwealth Union Society. We will offer military protection and advice, but you will be required to trade some goods with our nation, and citizens must add on a small .25% sales tax to all items under $75. The nation must tell the NSDIA of all binding decisions prior to making them and all non-binding decisions after. The nation would have to recognize itself as a Protectorate of Northern Sushi also. You will be able to create your own internal laws, and will be able to have an unrevokeable embassy in Northern Sushi.

The Northern Sushi Dept. of International Affairs (NSDIA)
Cocainistan
02-01-2006, 07:53
TO: The Government of Northern Sushi

No thanks, I've already got military protectors.

Bon appetit,
Luigi of Cocainistan