NationStates Jolt Archive

"Welcome in the Karelan Democracy of Rejistania! I as president of the ASR and my entire organisation are pleased that so many teams from all over the NSverse came to participate in the tournament for national teams, which are new in the world of international soccer - or have returned to it after quite a long period of absence. This tournament is for you a preparation to the real international challenge which is the world cup and its qualifiers." From Teke Daran's speech at the opening ceremony

"The Baptism of Fire tournament is a preliminary tournament to the World Cup, in which only new nations (newbs) are allowed. It was created by Kaze Progressa to encourage such nations to be involved in World Cup 12, which was to be co-hosted in the country - as well as to showcase the nation's less absurdly-sized stadia and to test the innovative scorination formula for WC12. More recently, it has emerged as a regular fixture in the sporting calendar. The RP-bonus is higher than usual (and furthermore is the only variable separating the teams besides luck) since the main intention of this tournament is to give a ranking boost for the World Cup to RPing newbs. Indeed, the Baptism of Fire tournament (slang: BoF) influences the KPB ranking system." From wikipedia.ns (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Baptism_of_Fire)

In this tourney, there will be 8 groups of 5, from which the 2 top teams will advance into the knockout stage. The groups are (the name in brackets is the city, the group games will be in):


Group 1: (Sike kali)
Majeristan
Wentland
New Historia
Tanah Burung
Amorah

Group 2: (Kalimnintan kalesa, KaMaRi kali)
Dagabom
Southern Universe
Dehny
The Kazoo Peoples
Keyshona

Group 3: (Maiju kalesa, KaMaRi kali)
Havl
North Fenris
Basicota
Legalese
Apologetic Kittens

Group 4: (Hetkali)
Firania
County Islands
Nezza
Star Signs
Northern Voobaha

Group 5: (Na~ovi kali)
The Ardenne
Cataduanes
Race City
Beleminares
East Lithuania

Group 6: (Sijitalatirikimidateme kali)
Schiavonia
Palacetonia
Language Teachers
Thergo
Hainan

Group 7: (Kalisimu kali)
Fbrenia
Bazalonia
United Island Empires
Pyrologists911
The Islands of Quta

Group 8: (Najajara kali)
Rolatia
Gruenberg
Hoolabaloola
Errinundera
Hurleyland


The schedule for group stage is:
MD1:
2 vs 5
3 vs 4
MD2:
1 vs 3
4 vs 5
MD3:
1 vs 5
2 vs 4
MD4:
1 vs 2
3 vs 5
MD5:
1 vs 4
2 vs 3

Venues will be added later.

[OOC: Are you taking over the BoF tournament Rejis?]

If RPing first, my opponent has permission to:
Choose my scorers.
Yellow card my players within reason.
Red-card Osiris Benoit for anything remotely aggressive.

Majeristan Falcons

Coach: Avid Mashoda (71 years old)
Assistant Coach: Roger Taylor (47 years old)

SQUAD (starters in bold)
Goalkeepers
1 Khari Hasenjafi (32). Has never held a starting goalkeeper position in any professional league until he played 14 games in the Majeristani semipro league's inaugural season with FC Tikira. Led the league with a 1.36 goals against average.
30 Hicham Elkayim (22). The heir apparent to Hasenjafi, Elkayim brings reflexes and athletic ability where Hasenjafi adds experience. Sporting Ikasi have signed him to a two year contract which he will honour upon graduating from uni.

Defenders
2 Khalid Amad (24). The youngest member of the most experienced part of the team, Amad brings speed at the halfback position in Majeristan's 4-4-2 formation. Warriors FC of Majeristan's largest city Henriabad have begun negotiations with Amad to man their backline.
4 Omar Joussaef (31). Age may have caught up to him as far as the Woodstock Wild were concerned, but Joussaef still brings speed that few players in the Majeristani semipro leagues can match. His years with the Wild gave him the savvy to face some of the finest talent in the world.
5 Bartolomeo Mustafa (34). Team captain. Unlike the Wild, which is embarking on a youth movement, the Portland Timbers were looking for a seasoned defender; however, Mustafa is not interested in playing sweeper until he's proven himself as the right fullback one last time.
14 Nur Horacio (35). Even though he retired from Division 1 play three years ago, Horacio was still considered by Mashoda the best right halfback with Majeristani papers.
6 Sarai Lujema (29). Though there was great controversy throughout Majeristan over having a female player on the team, she earned a spot for being able to play all four back line positions or sweeper in a 3-5-2.
16 Bevan bin Hessam (36). On an old defence, he's the oldest player and has been chosen strictly to provide depth for his team.

Midfielders
7 Osiris Benoit (22). A hard-nosed, rugged defensive midfielder, Benoit has been known to draw his share of cautions. Mashoda has been on him to control his temper, but when he's playing right, he's shutting down playmaking midfielders the world over.
9 Joe Taylor (23). The son of assistant coach Roger Taylor, there was controversy among the team for a non-Muslim being on the team, but Horacio held a meeting with Taylor and the team to clear the air. Taylor is now accepted among his teammates for his dangerous play on the left flank.
12 Sandalio Istali (21). Sandalio is the designated right footed free kick taker and has a rocket that can bend into the net from up to 35 yards out. He's been known to overrun his share of balls, however.
10 Hasse Ayanbede (20). With great inventiveness as a playemaker that belies his youth, Ayanbede was the only choice for playmaking midfielder in Mashoda's 4-4-2 formation. He still needs to learn to not be rattled by aggressive defensive midfielders.
13 Jaidev Djorki (19). Without Majeristan fielding a Under 21 programme, Djorki will have to learn on the job, but he's working hard on improving his defence so he can earn a spot in the starting 11 sooner, rather than later.
15 Ricky Spriggs (20). Despite the name, he is a full-blood Muslim, though he was raised by Sarzonian adopted parents. Brings a touch of the discipline he learned from a long ago coaching clinic put on by then-Sarzonia coach Dave Wilson.

Forwards
11 Hakan el Dajani (23). In the 20 games he played in the Majeristani semipro league, he scored 24 goals and is one of the most dangerous players with a header this side of Crystilakere.
15 Akamu Rasefjani (21). Blinding speed and a lethal left-booted shot are Rasefjani's biggest assets. His youth is his biggest drawback at the moment.
17 Mahli Noguni (24). Even though he's the most experienced forward on the roster, he has a partying streak and that cost him a spot on the starting 11. Otherwise, he has been developing some football savvy in his time in New Daurmont under Dave Wilson's half-brother.

OOC: There are three soccer leagues in Bazalonia, each uses a slightly different ruleset... only "Bazalonian Soccer League"(BSL) uses internation soccer rules... More details on the other leagues "Super Soccer Bazalonia" and "Free-Form Soccer Association" all come untiled under their international representative... The Bazalonian Federation of Soccer Associations The initials after the player is their associated league.... Anyway here is the player Roster... Bold entries are started


Other players if RP first can...
Determine my Goal Scorers
Determine any FFSA players that gets yellow cards
Determine if 'The Bandit' gets a red card (He will get yellows)
For anything else... probably don't...

The Bazalonian Bazalopes

Coach: Caine Hawdon (the Prime Minister's Cousin) Associated with BSL
Ass. Coach: Malcolm Frost Associated with SSB
Ass. Coach: Jayne Heart Associated with FFSA

Forwards:

Peter Hobble (31, BSL)
Lucas Reaver (32, SSB)
James Kantwell (33, FFSA)
Irchov Michael (34, BSL) ... said Ir-ch-ov Mi-ch-ael (ch is a gutteral)
Colin Neil (35, BSL)

Midfielders:

Anthony Creek (21, FFSA) ... Brother of Andrew 'The Bandit' Creek
David McMahon (22, SSB)
Benjamin 'Benny Boy' Peters (23, BSL)
Victor Boney (24, SSB)
Keith Gilmore (25, SSB)

Defenders:

Kevin Balsom (11, BSL)
Andrew 'The Bandit' Creek (12, FFSA) Can get a little agreesive particularily in tackles... has also been known to on occasion tackle the ref
Arthur Bindley (13,BSL)
Shane Smith (14,BSL)
Steve Conne (15, SSB)
Malcolm Halliwell (16, FFSA)
Hayden Peterson (17, SSB)

Goalies:

Jeffery Constantine (01, BSL)
Paul Kanga (02, SSB)
Micheal Clarks (03, FFSA)

"Bazalopes in the Fire" by Nev Gould

Spokespeople for the Bazalonian Federation of Soccer Associations, the national umbrella group for the nations 3 soccer leagues, and the body that deals with internation soccer bodies; has announced the draw and team for our national soccer team in the "Baptism of Fire"; a pre-cursor event to the reknowned 26th World Cup. The roster can be found on BFSA website (www.bsfa.org.bl). Assistant Coach to the Bazalonian Bazalopes (The tackily named team attending the Baptism of Fire), Malcolm Frost, says "I am very happy with the draw, our group and our position in the group and have all confindence with ourt team... Well with the SSB team members anyway."

The comment of the Assistant coach reveals the league divisions not only within the coaching team but also within the team itself... With a pretty good spread of players from all leagues within the Fowards, Midfielders, Defenders.. even one goalie from each league. Will the proverb "Too many inventors spoil the invention".. or in this case too many soccer leagues spoil the team. Time can only tell... The primary coach Caine Hawdon... denies this and says "We are all here for one thing... To show the world just how wonderful Bazalonia is... No one is thinking from which league people are from (everone knows BSL is proper soccer anyway) but everyone here is Bazalonian and we are here to represent the nation." This reporter is doubious about this statement and we'll just have to see what happens in the Baptism of Fire.

The Islands of Qutar National Team

Team Roster

Manager:: Paul Dove (Age::52)

GK :: Peter Stone (Club::Cëre United, Age::18)
GK :: Geraint Kozel (Club::Arun City, Age::19)
GK :: Peter Turner (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::19)
DEF :: Nick Saunders (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::21)
DEF :: Dominic Kelly (Club::Cëre United, Age::20)
DEF :: David Howell (Club::Arun City, Age::19)
DEF :: Amir Safavi (Club::Newport FC, Age::20)
DEF :: Alex Martin (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::22)
DEF :: William Lemkes (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::17)
MID :: David Parker (Club::Bristol City, Age::18)
MID :: Sam Tomlin (Club::Bristol City, Age::19)
MID :: Chris Saunders (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::23)
MID :: John Gordon (Club::Ryde United, Age::19)
MID :: Olliver Smith (Club::Cëre United, Age::19)
MID :: Nick Rogers (Club::Cëre United, Age::19)
ATK :: Thomas Siese (Club::Cëre United, Age::19)
ATK :: Ali (Club::Cëre United, Age::20)
ATK :: James Lemkes (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::21)
ATK :: James Thomas (Club::Bembridge FC, Age::21)

Qutar Sports News Network

Today in press conference called by the QFA, they announced their successful entry into the qualifiers of the World Cup. This will be Qutar's first international football competition, and as such the manager appointed at the helm of the National Team will be Paul Dove, the manager that lead Arun City to 9 consecutive Secret Haven Championship Cups, and 12 straight wins in the Qutar Premier League back in the period from 1984-1996. A great manager who has come out of retirement to lead his national side. In a statement he said that he would be proud to lead the national side, and be a representative for our nation on the world stage. When asked about the fact that the team he had picked, was a very youthful side, he responded by saying that although the side was on the younger side, that his team was full of energy and most have had the experience of at least two leagues in the Premier League, I know that their lack of experience will be made up by their energy on the pitch.
It seems the bulk of the team has been chosen from Cëre United and Bembridge FC, who came 1st and 2nd respectively in the league last season, and are fighting out a hard season at the moment. Most pundits will be thank full that Paul Dove doesn't mind the youth full side of football, thanks to his inclusion of the amazing young talent of William Lemkes, and only 17 this young man is one of the few in the country that can take on the likes of James Thomas and James Lemkes. Also pundits are looking forward to seeing a partnership between Ali and James Thomas, one respected pundit had this to say: "Ever since I have seen these two lads on the pitch with their dazzling skills, skipping past defenders who can only watch, I have wanted to see a partnership between them and now I can finally see them in action"
The QFA is delighted to become part of the world stage of the great sport, and is looking forward to partaking in the pre-World Cup tournament, The Baptism of Fire. For the opening game against Bazalonia, Paul Dove has said that the following start-up line is very likely.

Starting Line-Up (4-4-2 Formation)
GK :: Peter Stone [1]
DEF :: Nick Saunders [2]
DEF :: Dominic Kelly [3]
DEF :: David Howell [4]
DEF :: William Lemkes [5]
MID :: Sam Tomlin [6]
MID :: Chris Saunders (Capt.) [7]
MID :: John Gordon [8]
MID :: Nick Rogers [9]
ATK :: Ali [10]
ATK :: James Thomas [11]

On the Bench
GK :: Peter Turner [12]
DEF :: Amir Safavi [13]
DEF :: Alex Martin [14]
MID :: David Parker [15]
MID :: Olliver Smith [16]
ATK :: Tom Siese [17]
ATK :: James Lemkes [18]

Pundits Verdict

Peter Stone :: A very safe choice for the first choice goalkeeper, for the past two seasons since his controversial start aged just 16, he has proven himself worthy of wearing the gloves, time after time he has saved Cëre United from defeat with saves that at times are beyond belief. But there have been times when the fans have not been so happy with his performance, but since those times he has come out stronger and better from it.

Nick Saunders :: A good solid choice for leading the defence, has seen four seasons at Bembridge FC, and has been an asset to the club throughout those seasons. He is always putting in the last minute tackles when you'd thought the forward had broken through, helps to push the midfield up, and makes some useful runs down the left wing.

Dominic Kelly :: A very strong defender, very strong in his tackling as well, but not to the extent that he's fouling all of the time although fans of Cëre United might disagree. A good choice for a central defender, and has three seasons of experience with Bembridge FC, works well supporting Nick Saunders and William Lemkes.

David Howell :: A charismatic player, whose defensive abilities make up for the lack of it in his fellow players at Arun City, all to often they have relied on him during the past two seasons, and thanks largely to him they have managed to stave of relegation from the Premier League. Has managed to score a few goals for himself as well during those two seasons. Some have said that 2 years at Arun City is enough to age a man at least 10 years.

William Lemkes :: The third Bembridge FC defender in the opening line-up, this young talent has shone on the pitch, no longer will it be a certainty of strikers like Ali, and James Thomas to slice through the defence. He manages to put up quite a challenge to opposing strikers, he's not afraid to dive into tackles and unfortunately as a result has a higher than average number of yellow cards.

Sam Tomlin :: One of two Bristol City players named in the squad, he has shown great talent on the pitch last and this season, he can pick out a pass with pin-point precision, and get the ball just where the striker wants it, unfortunately the strikers at Bristol City aren't so good at latching onto that. But with the talent of strikers in the national squad his passing service could be incredibly useful

Chris Saunders :: The player with the most experience on the side, which will come in very useful in the games to come having played in seven seasons for Bembridge United, he is a very tactical player and can fill his position in the centre of midfield very well, running back to help in defence if needed and running up to support the strikers. A good choice for Captain.

John Gordon :: The only player in the squad from Ryde United, even though Ryde are a lower-middle table club, he has turned in some good performances in the centre of midfield, a strong player not afraid of going in for the tackle. Can link up very well with other players to build up play.

Nick Rogers :: Another of the Cëre United players in the national team, also the least experienced midfielder on the side, who has shown great talent this season with Cëre United, skipping past defenders in the wing to slip in a well placed cross for the strikers.

Ali :: One of the shining talents of Qutari football, ever since on his debut for Cëre United and scoring that wonder goal after dancing past all of the defenders and the goalkeeper, and he has continued on in this fashion worrying defensive line-ups all through the season.

James Thomas :: The other shining talent of Qutari football, an explosive force on the ball, combined with the fact that he can seemingly score from anywhere on the pitch, makes him a presence to be reckoned with. Combined with Ali the partnership should be unstoppable.

Peter Turner :: The number two goalkeeper in the country, but only by a small margin, also a young starter at just 17, a great find by Bembridge FC. For the past couple of seasons with him at the back and the strikeforce the other end, they have been a tough match for Cëre United. Some have said that his skills are underestimated due the fact that he has the best defence in the league protecting him.

Amir Safavi :: The only player from Newport FC, and has fuelled the hopes of its fans that they would be relegated this season. Thanks to his efforts they have managed to halt their descent down the table, a wise transfer during the last transfer window. A solid central defender, with four seasons experience.

Alex Martin :: The second most experienced player on the team with six seasons of experience at Bristol City, not the most bright star of talent in the midfield, but still a talented player who can hold the centre of defence together, and is a strong player.

David Parker :: A bright spark down the right wing of midfield, although inexperienced his talent does show through. Many goals for Bristol City have been set up by a neat cross right into the waiting striker. Press rumours have suggested that a starting position for him was all but guaranteed but following the press scandal into his partying life, the Manager thought to drop him from the starting line-up until he cleans up his act.

Olliver Smith :: A fan favourite of Cëre United, has set up and scored many goals over the past two seasons, but an injury early on in the season which he is only just getting over, has lost him a starting place in the National Squad.

Tom Siese :: The strike partner of Ali at Cëre United, a very gifted striker, although in his partner's shadow. But his contributions to the partnership gives Cëre United's attack more depth.

James Lemkes :: A very talented striker at Bembridge FC, and a very good friend of his partner, which leads to a very effective strikeforce and they can string together a move to slice through the defence.

OOC: Because of the fact that with all the extra background information I'm supplying this'll be way too long for the forums, it's going to be hosted on a web page. Link will be up when I finish

If RPing first, my opponent has permission to:
Choose my scorers.
Yellow card my players.
Red card goes to Jean-Michel Melby if game get lopsided (he gets overly aggressive when game is out of reach).



Northern Voobaha natonal team manager Andre Patterson said he was "rather pleased" with the opening group draw for the Blue Candle's first foray into international tournament football.

"i wouldn't say we're overwhelmed, but this will be a very good test of our strength.", Patterson said at this morning's press conference, "the opening match with County Islands will give us a good idea of where we need to be."

This is the first time since gaining independence that NV formed a true national squad.


Starting rosters and their domestic sides were announced as:
(4-3-3)
GK: #1 Marcus Andrews (FC Oasis, 32)
DEF: #7 Tomas LeGener (Casino United, 26)
DEF: #18 Ted Stefaniak (Vorodah Travellers, 22)
DEF: #6 Stacy Eckes (Healdsburg Reds, 19)
DEF: #20 Daniel Selan (FC Oasis, 20)
MF: #2 Jean-Michel Melby (Royal FC, 25)
MF: #14 Steve Brown (Deseret Stars, 20)
MF: #15 William Garrett (Exile FC, 23)
F: #11 Kendara (Ekipe AnTir, 21)
F: #5 Dustin Vrab (FC Oasis, 19)
F: #9 Winston Dutchin (Borderlands FC, 23)

RES: #00 Cooper Tillery (GK - Mariners FC, 26)
RES: #10 Mike Kearns-Fisher (DEF - Norije Warlocks, 31)
RES: #8 Eric Peterson (DEF - Bellin Demons, 29)
RES #12 Peter Griggs (MF - Royal FC, 28)
RES: #13 Jay Boden (MF - Norije Warlocks, 17)
RES: #3 Bill "Thriller" Moschler (F - Mariners FC, 24)
RES: #16 Nate Garot (F - FC Oasis, 29)
RES: #4 Stefan TaRame (F- Borderlands FC, 23)

[OOC: Are you taking over the BoF tournament Rejis?]


Indeed I am! Vilita apparently wanted to start the BoF on the 26th of December (next year).

OOC:Opponents may do what they wish, short of sending off the entire team.

APNN Sports Bulletin Special

Apologetic Kittens non-existant sporting history is about to be kick-started with their participation in the Baptism of Fire football tournament. The nation has a rich, if low key, history in the sport and the home-grown players shall be put to the test. However none of the big names shall be participating as the governing body (The APFA) has decided to not use profesional players.

However there is an exception who is here under circumstances which show a love for the game.

The team to be taken to the matches in Rejistania is as follows:

Head Coach:
Woodrow Moore: 57: A tactical genius, but prone to slightly irrational decisions on occasion.

Goalkeepers:
Darren Alington: 27: 6 caps: First choice goalkeeper and solid between the sticks. Just have to hope no matches in the later rounds go to penalties.
Ronnie "Wets the bed" Weeter: 18: 1 cap: A great hope for the future, but has a tendancy to become nervous when it really counts. Hopefully won't slip up here.
Horace Kanaga: 35: A real veteran whom it is hard to trick. Not as agile as he once was.

Right backs:
Claude Millhouse: 25: 6 caps: Solid at the back, but may be rusty after recent injuries.
Elroy Polson: 31: 3 caps: Another who still has power in his legs. Getting on a bit hasn't stopped the 6'6" monstrosity from winning headers.

Left Backs:
Jamel Wynter: 20: 6 caps: Quick and agile, he's been known to be light on the tackle, but should cause problems aplenty for any wingers looking to run in.
Roland Campbell: 32: 3 caps: Another example of the aged rustiness which is behind the first XI.

Centre Backs:
Eldon Kiefer: 33: 7 caps, 1 goal: Has been playing in foreign climes, but should still know how AP likes to play.
Herbert Reed: 32: 6 caps: The other half of a powerful central defence. They might not be as quick as they once were, but they're still strong.
Lester Ashmore: 26: 3 caps: Has impressed lately, but is still largely an unknown quantity.

Defensive Midfielders:
Lee Roberts: Captain: 26: 7 caps: Bought his way out of the contract with his current team to be eligible for this tournament, he is a powerhouse and deserving leader of the squad.
Jonathan Unk: 21: 1 cap: With Roberts in the team he may not get a chance to play. But he's a top player, showing why this is the strongest area of the AP squad.

Right Wingers:
Ernest Newman 30: 6 caps: Not as young as he once was, but precision passing and a cross you can always count on, his place is assured in the team.
Alphonso Chase: 19: 3 caps: Young and fast. That sums Alphonso up accurately. Blasts past the opposition.

Left Wingers:
Raul Chase 21: 6 caps: Similar to his brother, but better. He puts the opposition to the sword.
Darrell Schofield: 24: 3 caps: Not much to say about him, really. He gets the job done with hard work.

Attacking Midfielders:
Enrique Monroe: 20: 6 caps: He pushes past everything in his way, but a tendency to get carried away with tricks may cost him.
Anton "Ant" Aultman: 18: 2 caps: At 5'6" he is known for turning up where you least expect him.

Strikers:
Winfred "Iron Boot" Ironmonger: 31: 7 caps, 5 goals: A poweful striker with a shot that could put someone in hospital. Unfortunately that person is often several rows back in the crowd.
Dewey Gronko: 21: 6 caps, 3 goals: Fast and energetic he perfectly compliments IronMongers power.
Jerome Moore: 23: 3 caps: The compliment to Iron Boot at their club, he is second-placed to Gronko here.
David Leichter: 28: 3 caps: An average striker, neiother having the pace of Gronko nor the power of Iron Boot. However he is competent and always puts in a top effort.

With the team sheet fully filled, the training begins for the first match in Rejistania.

APNN will be there, hopefully you will be too.

OOC: Ugh, this might take a while - I have to get a whole website up, somewhere between 1/6 and 1/2 pages per player written...When's the tournament proper starting?

OOC:: If RPing first, my opponent has permission to:
Choose my scorers.
Yellow card my players within reason.
Insinuate bad refereeing decisions within reason (i.e disallowed goals, penalty disputes)

OOC: Ugh, this might take a while - I have to get a whole website up, somewhere between 1/6 and 1/2 pages per player written...When's the tournament proper starting?
I am preparing scores right now

The Schiavone Scribe
SCHIAVONIA DRAWS GROUP 6

Schiavonia have been drawn in group six for the up-coming Baptism of Fire tournament, which moves from it's usual location in Vilita, Atlantian Oceania to the newly democratised Rejistania in our very own region, FIFA.

Schiavonia will face four opponents in the group stage of the tournament, about whom Schiavonia know very little. But then, it is our first international tournament, so the same could probably be said about us.

Anyway, the group...

Group 6: (Sijitalatirikimidateme kali)
Schiavonia
Palacetonia
Language Teachers
Thergo
Hainan

Schaivonia are doing alright so far. They sit fourth in the group, but only on alphabetical order. However, by the time they play their opening encounter against Language Teachers, they could find themselves as high in the table as third!

Anyway, we should tell you about the squad. The team generally play with four defenders, two in the middle and one on each side. Then they have three in the midfield area and three attackers.

GOALIES
1. Ben Kershaw (Atletico Unimo [24])
2. Colin Kearns (Threlo Rangers [31])
3. Mark Percy (Kingsbury Monarchs [28])

DEFENDERS
11. Oliver Park (Threlo Rovers [22])
12. Gareth Marsden (Social Club de Sedgefield [21])
13. Tom Jenkins (Mirksdove Rifles [34])
14. Andy Payne (Threlo Rovers [29])
16. Arnold O'Kane (Kingsbury Monarchs [27])
17. Fernando Smith (Atletico Unimo [25])
18. Colin Peterson (Kingsbury Monarchs [27])
19. Fred Apple (Applethorst [26])

MIDFIELDERS
21. Kenny Sanderson (Kingsbury Monarchs [22])
22. Mike Jones (Kingsbury Rocks [33 (c)])
23. CJ Moore (Social Club de Sedgefield [30])
24. Paul Weir (Threlo Rovers [27])
26. Horatio Besenares (Atletico Unimo [19])
27. Calum Porse (Cartfield Athletic [20])

ATTACKERS
31. Filipo Schiavone (Social Club de Sedgefield [31])
32. Gary Topp (Threlo Rovers [29])
33. Harry West (Kingsbury Monarchs [32])
34. Craig McAndrew (Mirksdove Rifles [23])
35. Kevin Kerry (Melston Rovers [28])
36. Tony Tarmey (Welkay Lakeside [21])


Our first choice line-up is as follows...


1. Kershaw


16. O'Kane 11. Park 12. Marsden 17. Smith


21. Sanderson 22. Jones 23. Moore


32. Topp 31. Schiavone 36. Tarmey

BoF - Amorah to premier against Wentland
12/29 - Sike kali, Rejistania
-------------------------------

In an exciting day for Amoran sports, the Amoran National Football Team, dubbed the "SoundClash" after fans and players alike at a local scrimmage where very loud, has been drawn into Group A of the Baptism of Fire, along with Majeristan, Wentland, New Historia, and powerhouse Tanah Burung. The team will play it's first match against Wentland in Sike kali, Rejistania, on Match Day 1. Moral amongst the team and their fans is very high, and the team hopes to snag a first or second place spot, which will propell them into the next round.

With a solid defense, and an aggressive offense, the team looks good. They will have to play their absolute best if they want to win the tournament and go into the WC with a good record, though.

Amoran Nationall Footbal Team
------------------------------
Pos. - Name - Current Team
GK - Khaliel Fayadh - Shimane Seahawks

D - Josef Khaimah - Sharjah Athletik
D - Mohammed Al Ajman - Khaymah Syklones
D - Jethro Fujairah - Shimane Seahawks

MF - Markus Krankhor - Nara Samurai
MF - Lukas Kaebi - Salamah Admirals
MF - Kaysar Ridha - Khaymah Syklones
MF - Ray Seliah - Nara Samurai

A - Haedo Valdez - Khaymah Syklones
A - Ray Toro - Sharjah Athletik
A - Niko Barshoni - Hakodate Hurrikane

Matchday 1 Scores

presented by Coffee Desnike, the tastiest coffee - it wakes you up and is healthier than conventional brands!


Wentland 1 Amorah 3
New Historia 0 Tanah Burung 1

Region 1 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Amorah 3 1 0 0 3:1 2
2. Tanah Burung 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Majeristan 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. New Historia 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1
5. Wentland 0 0 0 1 1:3 -2

Southern Universe 1 Keyshona 1
Dehny 1 The Kazoo Peoples 1

Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Southern Universe 1 0 1 0 1:1 0
Dehny 1 0 1 0 1:1 0
The Kazoo Peoples 1 0 1 0 1:1 0
Keyshona 1 0 1 0 1:1 0
5. Dagabom 0 0 0 0 0:0 0

North Fenris 0 Apologetic Kittens 0
Basicota 1 Legalese 2

Region 3 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Legalese 3 1 0 0 2:1 1
2. North Fenris 1 0 1 0 0:0 0
Apologetic Kittens 1 0 1 0 0:0 0
4. Havl 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
5. Basicota 0 0 0 1 1:2 -1

County Islands 3 Northern Voobaha 2
Nezza 0 Star Signs 2

Region 4 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Star Signs 3 1 0 0 2:0 2
2. County Islands 3 1 0 0 3:2 1
3. Firania 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. Northern Voobaha 0 0 0 1 2:3 -1
5. Nezza 0 0 0 1 0:2 -2

Cataduanes 1 East Lithuania 0
Race City 0 Beleminares 4

Region 5 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Beleminares 3 1 0 0 4:0 4
2. Cataduanes 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. The Ardenne 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. East Lithuania 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1
5. Race City 0 0 0 1 0:4 -4

Palacetonia 2 Hainan 3
Language Teachers 0 Thergo 1

Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 3 1 0 0 3:2 1
2. Thergo 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Schiavonia 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. Palacetonia 0 0 0 1 2:3 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1

Bazalonia 3 The Islands of Qutar 2
United Island Empires 0 Pyrologists911 1 (no, that is no 0:9111, it's a 0:1)

Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Bazalonia 3 1 0 0 3:2 1
2. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Fbrenia 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. The Islands of Qutar 0 0 0 1 2:3 -1
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1

Gruenberg 3 Hurleyland 1
Hoolabaloola 1 Errinundera 2

Region 8 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Gruenberg 3 1 0 0 3:1 2
2. Errinundera 3 1 0 0 2:1 1
3. Rolatia 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. Hoolabaloola 0 0 0 1 1:2 -1
5. Hurleyland 0 0 0 1 1:3 -2



Some outdated Browsers have problems with this code boxes, if anyone of you is forced to use such a browser, please tell me and I'll change the layout!

East Lithuania's Roster Made

The following is the roster for the East Lithuania Great Whites for the BoF.

Head Couch:Ray Discolo

*=starter

Goal-Keeper:
*Jibreel Weaver - Age 24
Dillion Wagner - Age 23

Defence:
*Colin Katilius- Age 24
*Christion Johnson- Age 25
*Mark Sell- Age 24
Chad Putski- Age 26
Scott Varga - Age 25

Midfield:
*Paul Crystal - Age 25
*Kevin Ruth - Age 25
*Brian Knapp - Age 25
*Phil Genis- Age 23
Walter Chatman- Age 24
Tom DeBoa - Age 23

Forwards:
*Jeff Hardy - Age 38
*Eric Verman - Age 25
*Sabastion Tores - Age 25
Corey Dillion - Age 22

The Official Lineup of Firania

Starters in Bold

Keepers:
1 - William Lockhart
13 - Robert Kikander

Defensemen:
4 - Ili Olkikaos
11 - Scott Skendri
8 - Edward Qeuntios
9 - Eli Truis
14 - Del Truidi
19 - Sam Steadman

Midfielders:
2 - Fredrick Fallon
5 - Arthur Welsley
6 - Peter Sweeney
12 - Adam Scott
15 - Eelios Gray

Strikers:
3 - Felis Antrometus
7 - Wilson Ali
10 - James Edison
16 - Felix Wels
17 - Idri Eloson

If my opponent RPs first, they can do whatever they like. Just don't kill everyone.

Good morning, This is BazSport's delayed Telecast coverage of the Baptism of fire tournament, an introduction for Bazalonia into the world of International Soccer. I'm your commentator for the first match between our Bazalopes and the Islands of Qatar. It is a beautiful morning here on the first match day. Kick is scheduled in another 30 minutes and in 20 minutes time the teams will come out to sing the national anthems...

after kick-off*

It is now past the twentieth minute of the first half... The Bazalopes mid-fielder Anthony Creek with the ball... As he is challenged by a Qutari defender... I think it's number 3.. Yes number three which is.... Dominic Kelly. Anthony lifts the ball up and lobs it over the defender... somehow finding attacker Peter Hobble... There he is Hobble, one Defender and the Qutari Goalie... He shoots AND HE SCORES... HOBBLE SCORE'S BAZALONIA'S FIRST INTERNATIONAL GOAL... The small Bazalonian delegation is hooting and cheering ... no matter which league you support you will be standing up and cheering for this one....

... It's nearly the end of the matches first half.. The score is 1:1... a close game with 'The Bandit' recieving a yellow card for a late tackle... The Qutari striker scoring in the resulting penalty... As Irchov Michael is looking for some support ... but can't find support as his fellow laeage-mate Peter Hobble has been given a rest and Lucas reaver, number 32, is his replacement... is there going to be a problem linking up with his teammates? Yes there is, Irchov is having trouble finding somebody to pass it to.... The Qutari defense has rebounded after the first goal.... IRCHOV HAS LOST THE BALL... Qutari Midfielder ... number 8..... John Gorden has come up and stolen the ball from IRCHOV as he was about to pass the ball.... Qutari Scores.... 1:2... The Islands of Qutar are wining as the half-time siren tolls.... The Bazalope Coach certainly will have something to say to the players during the half-time break....

... What's this? The team has been re-vamped... The fowards are all forwards from the Bazalonian Soccer League... the Midfielders are all from Super Soccer Bazalonia and the Defenders... Are well... from allover the place... Is this a ploy for improved team co-operation within the fowards and the midfielders.... Wht it seems to be working... The Bazalopes have seemed to sprung out of the stalls with a great exuberance... It only seems a matter of time before another goal is scored....

After a number of misses by the BSL Forwards... Peter Hobble has the ball... wait.. no IRchov has the ball.. now Colin Niel.... The three forwards are passing the ball between each other...This passing technique is a favoured technique by the Bazalope's main coach, Caine Hawdon... Will it work? only time will... Wait.. there is a gap that has opened up.... The ball goes to Peter Hobbler... and he exploits it... a hard curved kick that hit the top left cortner of the goal... That was very hard to defend against and I don't think I have seen a kick like that all my time commentating Bazalonian soccer. Peter Hobble is certainly the star of this match as her celebrates his second goal... The score is now 2 all...

Irchov Michael has been swapped for Kantwell... The started had a break and is now ready for action... refreshed... will this fresh forward make the difference and break the deadlock? It's 15 minutes till the full-time siren... Let's just find out...

5 minutes to go... after tackling a Qutari forward and taking control of the ball, The bandit moves forward as he passes it to his brother.. Anthony... Anthony takes it up the field passing it to David McMahon.... David steps out and around a Qutari midfielder...nearly tripping over himself, but he regains is balance and control of the ball... He passes it up towards the Forwards... Who seem to be probing the Qutari defense and finding weaknesses.... James Kantwell is in... He has been found in a gap by Colin Neil and he makews a quick jab at the goal... the ball flies and just goes over the goalies hands as he dives to stop the goal..... James Kantwell has scored the third goal for Bazalonia....

As the Full-time siren basts the score for Bazalonia's first international match against the island of Qutar is 3:2... The Bazalopes have won.

Falcons hurry up and wait

The first matchday of the pre-World Cup XXVI Baptism of Fire Cup tournament got off without Majeristan lacing up their boots. According to the bye system employed in the tournament, the Falcons were required to sit out one match, and their off day came as the rest of the field began their revels.

"We're not happy about having our bye come on Matchday One," Coach Avid Mashoda said. "We've got other reasons to be upset, namely, the fact that teams that have played World Cup football in the past are in this Baptism of Fire Cup. That puts teams like us at a real disadvantage."

Mashoda said he wasn't going to file a formal complaint.

"That's up to the Football Association to decide if it's worth it," he said. "Personally, I don't think anyone will listen."

As for the Falcons, they face New Historia in their first matchday currently sitting in third place in the group because they watched Tanah Burung and Amorah win. Mashoda sounded off about the fact Tanah Burnung was competing in the Baptism of Fire Cup, noting that they faced a newcomer Sarzonia team that now is the world's number one ranked side.

Qutar Sports News Network

Good Morning Qutar, it looks like the players are ready to come out onto the pitch. They line up on the half way line, and first the Bazalonia anthem is to be played, they seem filled with pride to play for their country, and now the national anthem of Qutar, echoing round the stadium, the players fired with emotion as the whistle blows for the start of the game.

Qutar kick off and make some movements around the pitch, hang on Sam Tomlin is on the ball moving down the left wing, the defenders are closing him down can he get the cross it, he can, its met with the head of Ali, oh great save by Constantine there. Goal kick then, kicked up to the half way line, where John Gordon intercepts the kick, he's moving up the pitch and he's got support, gets past Balsom, and Smith, oh rough tackle by The Bandit there, surely a yellow card. No yellow says the referee, the Qutar fans are up in arms, the players aren't too happy, oh Gordon's has been shown the yellow for dissent. Free kick Bazalonia. It seems that Bazalonia are building up the pressure its about twenty minutes into the game, the midfielder Anthony Creek is on the ball, now as Kelly goes in for the tackle, oh no its been lofted over him, and Hobble is in open space, Lemkes goes in for the tackle too late he shoots, just past the reach of Stone. The Bazalonia fans go crazy, as the Qutari defence looks dejected, with Peter Stone yelling at Kelly and the rest of the defenders.
Time to re-group, as the whistle blows for play, Ali passes to Thomas, who slots it through to Rogers, and he moves down the right wing, and he slicing down the wing, gets the cross in only for Shane Smith to head the ball away from goal, hang on Qutar have too many men forward, Bazalonia are breaking on the counter attack, oh what a crucial tackle from Chris Saunders there taking it away from Creek, and with the men still up in support Chris Saunders passes it through to Ali who's slicing through the defence he's through on goal, hang on hes been brought down by the Bandit, surely a penalty, yes the referee has no hesitation, a yellow card for the Bandit. Ali places the ball on the spot, goes back for the run up, the crowd in a tense silence, he runs up, TOP RIGHT HAND CORNER!!! The crowd goes wild, 1-1 Qutar is back in the game.

It looks like Hobble is being subsituted off for number 32, which I think is Lucas Reaver, as they kick off again Qutar seem revitalised, and the Bazalonia strikers don't seem to be making a good partnership, as Irchov Michael is making a run he doesn't seem to have any support, and Gordon gets in the tackle, stealing the ball away from him and yes perfect pass through to Thomas, making strides foward with Ali in support, he outside the box two defenders on him, great pass to Ali is space, he shoots, BOTTOM RIGHT HAND CORNER!!! 2-1!!!! Qutar are winning, and there the half time whistle, what a way to finsh a half. Looks like the tide has turned in that half, the Bazalonia coach is going to have to do some serious talking

The atmoshpere in the stadium is electric, with Qutar fans and Bazalonia fans, chanting away. Its Bazalonia to kick off the second half, but hang on it seems the whole team has been revamped, and for some reason the Bazalonia fans are jumping out of their seats with excitement. We shall have to see if this new team, will do any good. Well its doesn't seem so, they have lost possesion already, to Tomlin who building up a good move as he passes to Chris Saunders, who passes back to Tomlin who's made a run down the wing, he crosses in to Ali, oh headed back by Gilmore, but only to the waiting feet, of Chris Saunders who neatly passes the ball through, oh Thomas is in open space, he shoots oh BOTTOM LEFT CORNER, 3-1!! the fans are going exstatic, but whats this the referee is blowing his whistle, no goal, it seems Thomas was offside according to the linesman, I don't think Thomas or the other players have realised, looks like there being told now. Oh that damped the mood at lot, it seems the Qutar fans aren't happy with that decision. Lets look at the replay, as Thomas makes his run, he is onside, this makes no sense. Looks like a bad decision by the linesman, lets hope it doesn't matter. Its seems to have helped Bazalonia, as they are now in possesion and dominating, the three forwards stringing together passes, good linkup between Irchov and Neil, but the defence seems to be coping, and with only 15 minutes to go, if they can just hold them off Qutar first international win could be assured. Hang on another good link up betwen Irchov and Neil, and good pass through to Hobble, who goes for the shot, oh no its curled into the top corner, nothing Stone could have done against that.

Its 2-2, and with only 15 minutes remaning Qutar need a goal and fast, but the momentum is with Bazalonia at the moment, as there fans are going wild. The forwards are bombarding the Qutar defence, which is holding just about, with some great tackles coming from Lemkes and Saunders. With 5 minutes left of normal time, hang on breakthrough by Thomas who's tackled by the Bandit, The Bandit moves forward as he passes it on to Anthony who takes it up the field and passes it neatly to David McMahon, as Gordon goes in for the tackle, who can only slow him down, as he passes it to the Bazalonia strikers. It looks like James Kantwell is in, he's seen a gap and is passed to by Neil, he shoots just passed the fingertips of Stone, its 3-2, Qutar fans are silenced.

With five minutes left, it seems the best Qutar could hope for would be a draw, and as they kick off it seems that their throwing everything in to it, with Gordon and Tomlin, trying to set up Ali and Thomas, but Bazalonia are keeping everyman back, with Qutar efforts being replused. We're in the final minute of the added time and hang on Tomlin is making a run down the left wing, he crosses it in but Halliwell manages to out jump Thomas, but heads it off for a corner. It looks like the last play of the match, and the goalkeeper Stone has come running up the pitch for the corner. And its Tomlin to take the corner, he swings it in, only to be headed out, oh its fallen neatly to Gordon, who unleashes a fierce shot, oh no its hit the crossbar and out of play. The final whistle blows, the game is over and Qutar's first foray into international has resulted in a narrow loss.

No-Score Draw Bore

North Fenris 0 - 0 Apologetic Kittens

Apologetic Kittens entered the world stage of football today, but not convincingly.

North Fenris rarely pushed forward, and the Kittens decided to base their style of play on their opponents. The closest chance for the kittens came when Iron Boot latched on to a Newman pass before blasting at it straight at the post. Reports, unconfirmed, suggest that what the referee was doing on the goalkeepers line afterward was checking that the post was still intact.

And the same lack of action occurred at the other end of the park, with Alington barely needing to move. Neither side could, or seemingly wanted, to break out of the midfield deadlock.

However the lack of action also presented a lack of fouls, with even Reed coming away without so much as a yellow.

The next match for the Kittens is against the group leaders Legalese. This should prove a stern test, but everyone should know that international football presents a steep learning curve. The lack of cards does however mean that Moore can send out an unchanged team.

The Bagwell Gazette
dec. 30- Bernie Pledge, Coach, recently told the Gazette that the reasdon for the sluggish start was a case of horrendous 'roids for Hurley FC star Malachi McBoru. He still accounted for one goal and a yellow card. Hurleyland played the first game in street clothes but have now recived there uniforms. The colors are Black, Red, and Blue. We have high hopes for our next game.

Forwards Couldn't Get It Done As Great Whites Lose 1-0

Yesterday, East Lithuania lost a valient match against Cataduanes after they scored at 12 minutes. After that, Weaver made as great an effort as possible not to let another one pass by. Although he succeded at that, the forwards just couldn't get one past their keeper. Even after a penelty shot by Crystal, it just wouldn't go in. At the end of the match, they were just miserable.

"We need to be more prepared." claimed Couch Discolo afterwards. "Most of these players haven't been in international play in a while, not since the U21WC. Hopefully we can put this aside and get ready for our next match."

The President of the Palacetonia Football Association is delighted that the full line up for the BoF World Cup is:


Palacetonia Football Association

Postion Number Forename Surname Age
Coach Iain Corder 52
G 1 Wes Tray 32
D 2 Clive Arty 24
D 3 Trev Park 26
D 4 Virgil Claus 26
D 5 Corrie Mears 24
M 6 Philip News 30
M 7 Wayne Owen 29
M 8 Jonathan Camry 26
S 9 Pip Wallis 29
S 10 Iain Williams 19
M 11 Ben Cleaves 23
G 12 Scott Antar 29
D 13 Matt Theat 25
D 14 Michael Camry 31
D 15 Alex Canady 27
D 16 Mark Kennedy 28
M 17 Simon Weeder 25
M 18 Ros Angel 27
M 19 Xander Giles 22
S 20 Ed Parker 24
S 21 David Fraser 25
M 22 Jim Berger 29


We are obviously all excited for the future of the football team. Despite their narrow loss yesterday in which the redhot forward line of Williams and Wallis each contributed a goal each, the association still continue their vote of confidence in the manager and hope that the results go their way.

We are investigating the power cut that led to a mass blackout across Palacetonia meaning the match could not be shown.

Two changes have been announced. Michael Camry picked up a minor injury and will be replaced by Trev Park and a disappointing display by Ros Angel means that she will be replaced by Wayne Owen.

Playing in a 4-4-2 formation will be
GK Wes Tray
D Trev Park
D Virgil Claus
D Alex Canady
D Mark Kennedy
M Wayne Owen
M Simon Weeder
M Ben Cleaves
M Jim Berger
F Pip Wallis
F Iain Williams

Speaking after the match with Hainan. Iain Corder said: "Well, obviously I am delighted that we played well considering that it is the first time we have played international competitive match but I am hopeful that the bouncebackability factor will come into play. Afterall, in a pre-tournament friendly of Palacetonia A v. Palacetonia B teams, A beat B by 4 goals to 2. We are capable of scoring many goals. It just finding that magickal combination to win and win convincingly."

At this point, questions were taken.

"Do you know your best side?" asked an impertinant reporter from the Daily Herald.

At this point, it was felt best to get up and walk out. Afterall, this kind of reportage is not helpful

***OOC***
Can anyone point me to the bits about if my opponent RP first, they can do whatever so i can stick this on asap

The Kazoo Peoples announced their lineups just two and a half minutes before their first match against fellow Group 2 opponent, Dehny.

Commentators and spectators alike were suprised while standing for the playing of the national anthems of both teams, that instead of the words to the respective national anthems shown on the JumboTron, found the roster of the Kazoo Peoples.

"As soon as I get the information, I just slap it up on them there scoreboard," a confused scoreboard technician later commented on the incident.

Dehny citizens were enraged by the untimely timing of the rosters overlaying their national anthem's words.

"Simply an outrage. I can't believe they did that," N. Raged Citizen said. "A disgrace to our proud heritage."

In a similar incident, the team rushed onto the pitch into their 4-4-2 formation (in their blue shorts and orange shirts, a kazoo proudly blazoned on their chest, no less) with 6 seconds left until the start of the match, and a possible forefit had the Kazoo Peoples players not arrived.

The Dehny coach sounded his discontent: "Tried for a sneak attack, eh? I knew coach Manni Aka would try something sneaky, but I didn't think this sneaky."

The roster of the Kazoo Peoples
# Name (Age, Team)
Goalkeepers
1 Jim Johnson (19, Untitled U-Boats)
::One of the four Johnson brothers on the natioal squad.
2 Robert Barker (18, Untitled Understudies)
::Spends his off-time as a local game show host.
3 Ham Mertime (23, Kazoo City Kazoos)
::Washed-Up Rapper/Singer/Songwriter, now a star soccer player.
Defenders
4 Dirk Smirkley (17, Monte Carlico Matadors)
::Model turned soccer player, his dazzling smile can distract opponents.
5 Scovest (21, Untitled U-Boats)
:: Known only by his first name, his recent cologne commercials (Hott Scovest) made him an instant celebrity
6 Aaron Slazeb (30, Kazoo City Kazoos)
:: One of the older members of the team, but his experience helps guide the team, even though he won't play too often.
7 Jack Johnson (23, Untitled U-Boats)
:: The second of the four Johnson brothers on the national team.
8 Mozzarella Munster (32, Kazoo City Kazoos)
:: His fiber-filled diet and exercise keep him regular. A regular player, that is.
9 Cha Cha Cha (27, Untitled Understudies)
:: In the off-season, he spends his time as a dance instructor.
10 Man I. Anka (25, Untitled Understudies)
:: Hopes to become a defensive great.
Midfielders
11 Kevlar Shafur (19, Untitled U-Boats)
:: Can stop a bullet pass from one of his teammates.
12 Bob Untitled (18, Untitled Understudies)
:: Aspires to be great midfielder when he reaches his prime.
13 Mark Perknowleski (29, Monte Carlico Matadors)
:: The longest last name on the field.
14 Manni Aka, Jr. (6, Kazoo City Kazoos)
:: No folks, that age is not a typo. Sport Minister and Coach of the national soccer team, Manni Aka, convinced local officials to take his son to the Baptism of fire and the World Cup. Though a regular in the usually-abysmal Kazoo City Kazoos back home, his father has benched him so that he won't get injured.
15 Mike Sweeny (42, Monte Carlico Matadors)
:: The oldest member on the team. In the offseason, he is a professional baseball player.
16 Rudy Johnson (21, Untitled U-Boats)
:: The third of four Johnson brothers.
17 Melvin Hermville (23, Kazoo City Kazoos)
:: After writing years of sports fiction (best-seller Doby Mick), he brings his knowledge of the game to the field.
Forwards
18 Chadd Johnson (25, Untitled U-Boats)
:: The fourth of the Johnson brothers. Arguably, the best of them all.
19 Jonny Lampshade (18, Untitled Understudies)
:: The only Understudy in the starting lineup
20 Jezze Stingray (29, Kazoo City Kazoos)
:: Having two "z"s in his name makes him cool. Real cool.
21 Fie Calmater (26, Kazoo City Kazoos)
:: Spends offseason as a sewer manager, keeping the streets of Kazoo City clean. This might explain the apparent alienation from the rest of the team.

Starting Lineup
GK Jim Johnson
D Scovest
D Dirk Smirkley
D Jack Johnson
D Mozzarella Munster
MF Kevlar Shafur
MF Mark Perknowleski
MF Mike Sweeny
MF Rudy Johnson
F Jonny Lampshade
F Chadd Johnson

[[OOC]]
My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events Y, within reason
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players N
Godmod Other Events N

The Kazoo Peoples got their first ever point in soccer history today, drawing Dehny 1-1.

Coach Manni Aka, singing along to the national anthem being played over a 301,494-watt speaker, stopped singing to say, "This is a great thing for our boys," and resumed singing.

"So how are you preparing for tomorrow?" a reporter asked about an hour later.

"Tomorrow? Aw, !@#$," Coach said. He then proceeded to shut down the celebration, and ordered all of his players to bed.

"So, you mean to say, that you had no idea that this match was part of a tournament, and that there are still at least three more matches?"

"I just thought someone was inviting us to have a little friendly game, and promote that whole international cooperation thingy."

"What do you have to say about the draw?"

"I real glad they came from behind. I'm glad we drew. Enough questions, I've gotta figure out my strategy for tomorrow."

Early in the first half, Dehny scored at the 14 minute mark. Kazoo People supporters, though having a dampened spirit, continued to cheer throughout the game.

"I'm real proud of our fans," quipped local wise man Iquelierous Kashykeri. "They hung in there like an alcoholic stays at a bar way past closing."

The game was televised all across the nation of 143 million people.

In the second half, some supporters feared a loss. But a staggering play at the 80-minute mark stunned spectators, and forced some commentators to re-explain what happened. I quote the commentators:

"OOOH! Close shot on the goal there... Johnson tosses the ball down the pitch to Johnson, who dribbles it to Johnson, to Johnson, who approaches the goal, SHOOTS, OFF THE GOAL, back to Johnson, who SHOOTS, SCORES, GOOOAL! Johnson to Johnson to Johnson to Johnson, off the goal, Johnson scores!"

"That's a lot of Johnsons!"

"Yes, that is. Let me clarify: goalkeeper Jim Johnson threw it to defenseman Jack Johnson, who passed it to Rudy Johnson, who gave it up to Chadd Johnson, who shot, missed, and then scored! A family affair of Johnsons ties the game at 1!"

Time expired, and the game resulted in a draw.

The Kazoo Peoples national team now is knotted atop the leaderboard of Region 2, with three other teams sharing the top spot. They play Keyshona tomorrow.

< as you flip through the satellite channels.. you come across a mildly amusing commercial.. as it end you hear the familiar five note opening jingle with an announcer's voice under.>

ANCR: NVNN presents.. the Baptism of Fire post-match report. Brought to you by "Chairman Meow...the Chinese food for cats." Now, your hosts, Dan Chatrick and Keith Oldermann...

<the lights soften from the NVNN trademark bright blue to show two 40ish men sitting at the desk.. Dan, with boyish looks and perfectly placed blond hair, and Keith, with ovesized circle-rim glasses and greying hair.>

DAN: Welcome to the Jungle has new meaning to the Northern Voobaha team tonight.. to them it's more than just a Guns N Roses song.
KEITH: The Blue Candle made their international debut tonight in the opening round of the Baptism of Fire.. and by jungle, you mean a walk through a dangerous place where one missed step means you get pounced on by a jaguar.... and the jaguar just happens to be wearing a County Islands jersey.
Let hit the highlights...
<video comes over their voice>
To the third minute.... County on the attack.. the long ball from midfield gets past Peterson. But who catches Eric Peterson in a footrace?
DAN: most everyone. Keeper Marcus Andrews comes out but he's in no man's land.. BANG.. one nil County.
KEITH: it's ok, still early.. time for a comeback right? 14th minute.. County again.. crossing pass through the box... the quick feed back to the top of the penalty area... no blue jerseys within 5 meters... the onetimer goes in.
Andrews was simply hung out to dry on that one.
And for manager Andre Patterson? welcome to inernational soccer. Hope your headache goes away soon.
DAN: It does in about 23 minutes.. jumping ahead because we can. NorVoo on the attack. Winston Dutchin setting up the corner.. outswing.. Kendara over the top of the defender.. heads it past the CI keeper! Northern Voobaha's first internatioal goal... and Kendara celebrates like any 21 year old with a 2.2 million Royale contract extension would.. by peeling off the shirt.. PNV down 2-1
KEITH: Look at that...he must work out at the gym.
DAN: To the second half -
KEITH: is that why the Blue is going the other way? I just though we reversed the image again to save money...
DAN: Great journalism skills partner...
KEITH: That's what they pay me for, Dan.
DAN: Ok, Mister Obvious, you call this one...
KEITH: 62nd minute.. I got that from the clock at the top of the screen.
Kendara again... far side... looking for anyone... anyone..
DAN: Bueller? Bueller?
KEITH: How about Dustin Vrab? slipping to the near post.. PUT THE BISKIE IN THE BASKET! PNV answers with two straight goals to knot this thing at 2 all.
DAN: Again, moving ahead in time, because we can.. 82nd minute. County on the attack.. watch closely.. the chip into the box is contested. Andrews goes for the punchout, but lands an solid elbow the to head of a CI forward..
Out comes the yellow. Here comes the penalty kick. bang. Here endeth the lesson. Northern Voobaha takes a tough 3-2 loss to County Islands.
<video dissolves to show DAN and KEITH at the desk>
DAN: So tonight's opener for Northern Voobaha... generally pleasing, but occasional bits of sloppiness...
KEITH: Funny, Dan, I was just thinking that about your wife. For the soon to be divorced Dan Chatrick -
DAN: WHAT??
KEITH: - I'm Keith Oldermann.. golf is next.. third round coverage of the Western Counties Open, live from Wikata. We'll see you tomorrow ngiht.
<the music fades in.. as the lights return the set to the openning blue glow...>

"SoundClash" wins Inaugural Match
GD 2 - Sike kali, Rejistania
-------------------------------

Another exciting day for Amoran Soccer as the National Team, dubbed the "SoundClash," has won their inaugural international match against Wentland 3 to 1. Around 13,000 fans from Amorah came to support the team, and not one was dissapointed with the way they played. Khali Al-Sayfrah, a doctor from Sharjah, was quoted as saying "I'm damn proud I came out to support our boys, 'specially Ray Toro, he plays well with my home team and with the national team! Kid's going places..."

The game started rather tediously, with the ball mostly staying in the center of the field. Amorah did have much of the possession, and by the 20th minute they were in Wentland territory, passing and getting a few shots on goal. In the 26th minute, midfielder Lukas Kaebi intercepted a ball being passed between Wentland players', and dribbled it to around the edge of penalty box, where he passed it high to attacker Ray Toro, who at the goal box headed it into the goal were it passed the goalkeeper and went in to hit the back of the net. In the 42nd minute, Ray Toro ran the ball down the field, to pass to forward Haedo Valdez, the 18-year-old from Khaleejah, who kicked it in the corner of the net. The half ended, 2-0, and the players and the crowd were going crazy with Amoran spirit. Fans in the red and white away jerseys flew the flag and chanted at times "SoundClash," "Toro," and "Haedo."

In the second half, Ray Toro again scored, with a kick from around the penalty box went straight into the net at the 63rd minute. Back-ups and trainers went into the game after the third goal to get some experience. They held the Wentlandians back until the 81st minute, were a Wentland forward went passed two rookie defenders to kick it into the net, past the goalkeeper for the Shimane Seahawks, Khaliel Fayadh. The game ended, and the final score was 3-1, propelling Amorah to the top of the group.

Today the SoundClash will play Tanah Burung, a once great and mighty team who left the game for a while and is back in. Although many teams have shunned the idea of teams who played a while back participating in the BoF, the Amoran Team really doesn't mind the extra competition, although it would be a little bit unfair if one of these teams won the tournament.

Amorah plays Tanah Burung, ranked number 2 after a 1-0 win over New Historia, at the stadium in Sike kali, Rejistania. The current standings of Group 1 are:

Region 1 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Amorah 3 1 0 0 3:1 2
2. Tanah Burung 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Majeristan 0 0 0 0 0:0 0
4. New Historia 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1
5. Wentland 0 0 0 1 1:3 -2

Other games today in the group are Majeristan vs New Historia. More news and coverage on the BoF and the Amoran National Team to be posted as it comes in.

Qutar Sports News Network

After the first game in the Baptism of Fire tournament, the QFA have called a press conference to answer press questions on the match. The national manger had this to say on the team's performance;

"Although we lost the match, we had chances to take the match in our favour. One example of this was the disallowed goal, that I believe was an unfair decision, but that is what happened in the game and we should have at least got a draw in the end but unfortunately Bazalonia managed to get past our defence twice when they shouldn't have. But apart from the two laspses I believe our defence played very well, and our midfield was solid and upfront we didn't lack, unfortuanatly the other team won this time. But I believe that the next match, will give us the chance to show our talents."

Player Ratings

Peter Stone :: 8/10
Played very well in the match as was unfortunate to beaten by the shots.

Nick Saunders :: 7.5/10
Played solid in defence although his lapse allowed the second goal to be scored. Along with Lemkes helping save the scoreline stay at three and not more.

Dominic Kelly :: 7/10
Played solid in defence, made some good tackles.

David Howell :: 7/10
Solid in defence, but not in as much of the action as he could have been.

William Lemkes :: 8/10
The best defender never letting up and putting more than a few saving tackles in.

Sam Tomlin :: 7/10
Made some good runs down the left wing, getting the crosses in alothugh more than a few met the heads of the opposition.

Chris Saunders :: 8/10
Solid in the centre of midfield, and solid as a captain regrouping his team after the first goal was conceeded.

John Gordon :: 8/10
A solid partner in the centre of midfield with the captain, making crucial passes one of which lead to the second goal.

Nick Rogers :: 6/10
The weakest link in the midfield not giving the right hand side of the pitch the strength it needed.

Ali :: 9/10
Outstanding first game for Qutar, with the two goals to his name, and set up the disallowed goal for Thomas.

James Thomas :: 8/10
Played well with Ali, setting up the second goal for him, and unfortunatly robbed of a goal, promising partnership for the next game though

Squad

Goalkeepers

1. Soren Poschelkin - 32 - Milkman
13. Dobro Sessi - 24 - Geography teacher
18. Pitzl Patzl - 19 - Computer Science student

Defenders

17. Noshti Plofton - 26 - Hotel worker
2. Chrick Peen - 29 - Hydroelectric plant worker
4. Harrak Niwetz - 22 - Cable television sales rep
5. Yorrick Treth - 33 - Hunter
14. Illinas Gerver - 28 - Demographer
15. Hiho Woll - 22 - Journalist
16. Vornol Behethzen - 20 - Longshoreman

Midfielders

6. Urga Urga - 23 - Geological engineer
7. Nftab Dnisi - 19 - Unemployed
3. Stren Coccilianata - 26 - Dentist
8. Pargo Willian - 23 - Philosophy student
17. Byd Jonnas - 21 - Market trader
19. Agia Brebst - 20 - Music student
20. Domin Ftzl - 25 - Sugar picker

Forwards

10. Klicki Geff - 29 - Junior school teacher
11. Pinin Brebst - 24 - Professional hockey player
12. Yibimini Erehiasa - 23 - Waiter
9. Therl Driv - 32 - Prisoner

(OOC stuff: My opponent can do what the fuck they like re RPing goals, decisions, injuries, etc., up to and including raining thermobaric weaponry on my team.)

Geff Gives Gruenberg Glimpse Of Glory

'World Cup victory is now almost certain,' Gruenberger Goats head coach Fergo Metrufnit assured reporters last night after the team's shock victory over Hurleyland in the opening round of the Baptism of Fire. The tournament precedes World Cup 26, and is intended for teams, such as Gruenberg, new to international football.

Gruenberger fans had thronged to Rejistania in their thousands for the big match, marking the Sultanate's first ever official international match, and packed the small stadium in Najajara kali, dark green and purple flags, scarves and shirts colouring swathes of sweating, inflatable goats proudly waved aloft, some of the most obscene chants imaginable rending the cool night air, as they cheered their time on to a surprisingly convincing victory.

The 20-man squad of amateurs had been training together at a private facility for the past week, and appeared in high spirits before the match, signing autographs for lucky children and chatting with journalists. Illinas Gerver, by trade a demographic statistician for the Gruenberg State Institute for Research and Development, described his 'incomparable adulation' at the scene, going to say that he felt they really were 'on the cusp of making history', although he later adjusted his sentiments slightly when informed he had not made the final eleven, stating that 'no one gives a shit about this pissing little sport anyway and it's not fair and I hate it'.

The team that lined up to play included students and teachers, farmers and engineers and, most notably, convicted murderer Therl Driv, expected to face the death penalty on his return to Gruenberg. Driv started at centre forward, and made a number of attacking runs into the Hurleyland box, but was sent off after just 28 minutes of play. The Gruenberg Football Association have said they will contest the decision, and the one-match suspension it brings, arguing that nowhere in the laws of the game is the use of a crowbar explicitly prohibited.

The Goats had taken an early lead, thanks to a dazzling run by Nftab Dnisi, one of only two Gelziens to make the squad, who beat three defenders before laying off to Urga, who blasted the ball home. Hurleyland fought back, though, and by half time, star player Malachi McBoru had levelled the score. Stern words from Metrufnit saw the Goats emerge, in his words, 'well up for it', and it took barely three minutes for teacher and left-winger Klicki Geff to seize upon an errant deflection and take the lead with a deftly-placed finish. Then, on 72 minutes, it was Geff again, this timing heading in a Dnisi corner, to put the Goats in a position of some comfort. The final few minutes saw several increasingly desperate counter-attacks by Hurleyland, but to no avail, thanks in large part to the variously determined or brutal tackling of captain Yorrick Treth.

Ecstatic goats fans mobbed the team as they tried to leave the field, hoisting the players aloft. Celebrations lasted long into the night, the players allowed out for one night, as they have a bye in the next round. Metrunit will have been careful to warn his players against complacency, as next up is Errinundera, sporting a vastly experienced side returning to the international scene after a long absence. He privately commented, though, that he expected the Goats to 'slaughter' the opposition.

With Driv's appeal unlikely to be upheld in time - if at all - the team that meets Errinundera will look slightly different, and will probably include an extra defender. Some critics expressed concern over right midfielder Pargo Willian's performance, but Metrufnit, sweating profusely, declared that his place was 'safe as rocks'. Speculation that his inclusion may arise from Court pressure - Willian is His High Holiness Grand Sultan Gardab Woltzten IV's nephew - has been firmly denied by the GFA. Urga Urga will also be consulting medical advice after slightly spraining his knee whilst battling football hooligans with a broken chair after the game, but is likely to be ruled fit to play.

Result
Gruenberg 3 (1) - (1) 1 Hurleyland
Scorers: Gruenberg - Urga, Geff (2); Hurleyland - McBoru
Cards: Gruenberg - Dnisi, Driv (R), Niwetz; Hurleyland - McBoru
Team: [3-4-3]Poschelkin; Peen, Treth (c), Niwetz; Coccilianata (sub A. Brebst), Urga, Dnisi, Willian; Geff, Driv, P. Brebst (sub Erehiasa).

Qutar Sports News Network

In a statement from the QFA tonight, the team sheet for the upcoming game against Pyrologists911 has been announced with Nick Rogers being dropped in favour of David Parker who has been denied a first team spot by his partying habits. In the statement the QFA said that David Parker had cleaned up his act and just wants to play for his country. The rest of the team remains unchanged. The manager is said he was looking forward to the match and is confident of picking up their first points of the tournament.

Team Roster

Starting Line-Up (4-4-2 Formation)
GK :: Peter Stone [1]
DEF :: Nick Saunders [2]
DEF :: Dominic Kelly [3]
DEF :: David Howell [4]
DEF :: William Lemkes [5]
MID :: Sam Tomlin [6]
MID :: Chris Saunders (Capt.) [7]
MID :: John Gordon [8]
MID :: David Parker [15]
ATK :: Ali [10]
ATK :: James Thomas [11]

On the Bench
GK :: Peter Turner [12]
DEF :: Amir Safavi [13]
DEF :: Alex Martin [14]
MID :: Nick Rogers [9]
MID :: Olliver Smith [16]
ATK :: Tom Siese [17]
ATK :: James Lemkes [18]

(OOC: And I finally get something up :) )

RFA ANNOUNCEMENT
http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/250/federationlogo8nq.png (http://imageshack.us)
The Rolatian Football Association officially announced that John Gatri, manager of the Rolatian football team, after a long meeting with his coaches over the final squad, have removed ten players from the squad to make a final squad composed of twenty-six players - three goalkeepers, ten defenders, eight midfielders and five strikers. This was a fully coaching staff made decision and was not influenced by any members of the RFA, including but not limited to President Joseph Edwards and the sixteen top club representatives.

GOALKEEPERS
1) David Ramar - New Millwall - GK
14) William Koiraj - Redmofo City - GK
23) Alan Sillars - Ranaria City - GK

DEFENDERS
2) Timothy Arast - Ranaria City - DRC
3) Frederick Byers - Aquas City - DL/DML
4) Thomas Jojufag - Riato Rovers - DC
5) George Vokisp - New Millwall - DRC/DMC
13) Brian Rogers - Ranaria City - DRLC
16) Aaron Smith - Aquas City - DR/DMR
19) Joshua Raksi - New Millwall - DLC
20) Joseph Kasgh - Aquas City - DR
25) Samuel Ajuif - New Millwall - DRC/DMC
26) Simon Slater - Rasto Town - DRLC/DMRLC

MIDFIELDERS
6) Tony Safalan - Redmofo City - MRC
7) Elliot Dunkel - New Millwall - ML/AML
8) Stephen Kasfuh - Aquas City - DMC/MLC
9) Jason Saloir - Wirus Rovers - MC/AMC
12) Liam Koigda - Redmofo City - AMC
17) James Stephenson - Redmofo FC - MRC
21) Scott Black - Aquas City - AML
22) Robert Jopgias - Yaewe City - MRL

STRIKERS
10) Tedd Verres - New Millwall - SC
11) Ian Jasofiah - Wolaru United - SC
15) Oliver Morgan - New Millwall - SC
18) Jonathan Clarke - Aquas City - SC
24) Robert McKayle - Riato Rovers - SC

We have also decided it is time to publish the final kit for the Rolatian players in the Baptism of Fire and the World Cup - we will be using the second of two designs suggested by our designer teams.
http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/9403/rolatiauni7rk1jh.jpg (http://imageshack.us)

The manager has also announced he will be using a 4-3-1-2 formation for the group games - details attached below. The players for the next game will be 1-11 on the field, with 12-16 on the bench.
http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/8724/43122qw.png (http://imageshack.us)

(OOC: Attack modifier +1. I give my opponent permission to choose yellow cards and goalscoring events...and that's about it. Don't try blaming all the conceded goals on own goals or I'll just ignore it ;))

Matchday 2 Scores

Presented by: Konihekta JSK - The inexpensive partner for all your communication needs as long as availability and high speed do not belong to them!

Group 1:
Majeristan 1 New Historia 0
Tanah Burung 2 Amorah 0

Group 2:
Dagabom 1 Dehny 0
The Kazoo Peoples 2 Keyshona 1

Group 3:
Havl 1 Basicota 1
Legalese 2 Apologetic Kittens 2

Group 4:
Firania 0 Nezza 1
Star Signs 1 Northern Voobaha 2

Group 5:
The Ardenne 0 Race City 1
Beleminares 0 East Lithuania 0

Group 6:
Schiavonia 1 Language Teachers 0
Thergo 0 Hainan 3

Group 7:
Fbrenia 1 United Island Empires 0
Pyrologists911 0 The Islands of Qutar 2

Group 8:
Rolatia 0 Hoolabaloola 3
Errinundera 1 Hurleyland 0

Region 1 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Tanah Burung 6 2 0 0 3:0 3
2. Majeristan 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Amorah 3 1 0 1 3:3 0
4. Wentland 0 0 0 1 1:3 -2
5. New Historia 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Kazoo Peoples 4 1 1 0 3:2 1
2. Dagabom 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Southern Universe 1 0 1 0 1:1 0
4. Keyshona 1 0 1 1 2:3 -1
5. Dehny 1 0 1 1 1:2 -1

Region 3 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Legalese 4 1 1 0 4:3 1
2. Apologetic Kittens 2 0 2 0 2:2 0
3. Havl 1 0 1 0 1:1 0
4. North Fenris 1 0 1 0 0:0 0
5. Basicota 1 0 1 1 2:3 -1

Region 4 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. County Islands 3 1 0 0 3:2 1
Star Signs 3 1 0 1 3:2 1
3. Northern Voobaha 3 1 0 1 4:4 0
4. Nezza 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
5. Firania 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1

Region 5 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Beleminares 4 1 1 0 4:0 4
2. Cataduanes 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Race City 3 1 0 1 1:4 -3
4. East Lithuania 1 0 1 1 0:1 -1
5. The Ardenne 0 0 0 1 0:1 -1

Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 6 2 0 0 6:2 4
2. Schiavonia 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Thergo 3 1 0 1 1:3 -2
4. Palacetonia 0 0 0 1 2:3 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Islands of Qutar 3 1 0 1 4:3 1
2. Bazalonia 3 1 0 0 3:2 1
3. Fbrenia 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
4. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Region 8 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Errinundera 6 2 0 0 3:1 2
2. Hoolabaloola 3 1 0 1 4:2 2
3. Gruenberg 3 1 0 0 3:1 2
4. Hurleyland 0 0 0 2 1:4 -3
5. Rolatia 0 0 0 1 0:3 -3


OOC: Tomorrow, I most likely won't be able to scorinate... too drunk, overtired or pissed off! Girls just wanna have fun, you know!

The Bazalonian Coaching team enters a press conference. Caine Hawdon the primary coach addresses the assembled media.

"After our great start on Matchday 1, I for one, was eager to see my team go out there and win our second match in a row. However this will have to wait as for Matchday 2 we have got a bye. So we'll have to wait for Matchday number 3. We have special plans for today. Though We do not wish to announce exactly what those plans are. A team needs to keep their preperation secret. We are looking forward to meeting the Pyrologists on the third matchday. Are there any questions?"

A short blonde-haired reporter raised her hand. "What do you beleive about the antics of Andrew Creek aka "The Bandit? He had recieved a yellow card and nearly got a red card for another tackling incident."

Jayne Heart, the Assistant coach and coaching representative for the FFSA says... "I'll take ths question.... Andrew is a player that sees opportunities and takes them, He's our best and most dedicated defender and I would not even consider having a Bazalonian national team that did not have 'The Bandit' on it."

"Thank you the reporter said as she scribbled sat down making sure her dictaphone was working properly

A medium-height black-haired man stood up and asked a question, two infact
"I have 2 questions about the Qutari's denied goal. With the final score being 2:3 and the Bazalonian Bazalopes only having won by a goal margin. What is your take on the umpiring mistake and with that mistaking seemingly re-invigorating the Bazalopes with 2 out of thier three goals coming after that mistake do you fear that the Bazalopes do not really have what it takes in the international soccer arena?"

Malcolm Frost, Assistant coach and representative for Supper Soccer Bazalonia, replied to this question "Umpiring mistakes are part of the game, You don't complain when they go your way, why should you think you can comlpain when they go the other way? About the second part of the question, I am not going to going to go into "what-if"'s. Bazalonia is here and we are making a solid start for ourselves winning on the first matchday."

The reporter sat down making a few notes on his notepad as another stood up and asked a question.

"What do you thinki of the other teams that are competing in the Baptism of Fire?"

Caine Hawdon answered this question "We are looking at their playing styles and trying to come up with ways of dealing with them. If you are looking for anything more from us about our opponents, sorry, that's it.I think we have to call the conference to an end, we've got things to do. Thank you for your attendance and you'll be seeing the Bazalopes on the field tomorrow."

OOC: I'm gone for a few days, and here's what I miss...

Anywho, something more to come eventually.

IC:


Channel Sport, the nationwide sports network in Legalese, was having a usual slow news day. Not too much was going on in the Legalese sports world, so they thought. The domestic soccer leagues were not playing at the time, and training for Season 2 had yet to begin, leaving the channel to play nothing but reruns of "The World Series of Tiddlywinks", which oddly enough, had become the network's second-highest rated show.

Meanwhile, in the Channel Sport newsroom, a call came in, confirming an odd story, one that seemed very unlikely. "How is that possible? They've played in it before, back thirty-two years ago. They never invite teams in twice!"

"That's what we thought, too", said the reporter on the line. "Apparently the Rejistanis have played by different rules. I'm trying to get a comment from LAFF, who've apparently kept it under wraps."

"You do that," said the man who took the call, Channel Sport's newsroom director. "I'll have this go up on the network; be ready to report at 6."

Moments later, with the next update, a line was added to the bottom ticker:

"BREAKING NEWS: Unnamed Source has confirmed the Legalese Men's National Team is playing in the Baptism of Fire Tournament. They lead Group 3 with 4 points in two matches. Watch Channel Sport News for more information."

The Kazoo Peoples national soccer team got their first-ever international win, beating Keyshona 2-1.

At local bars and eateries throughout the nation, one thing was constant: the droning and humming of kazoos.

The Ministry of Sports spent K$2,100,000 to supply 1,987,024 kazoos to hum the national anthem and general ruckus.

One bartender commented, "I can't believe I agreed to pass these things out! What in the hell were those Ministry of Sport people thinking!? My ears are ringing!"

"How many did you pass out?"

"What? I can't hear you?"

"HOW MANY DID YOU PASS OUT???" shouted our roving reporter in Kazoo City.

"No one passed out that I can think of," the bartender said, "Although there was that one bloke who looked pretty happy with the win." He gestured towards a corner, next to a dartboard. A man was slumped, with a bottle in his hands clearly labeled, "Water."

"Water's not harmful, is it?"

"No, it isn't, but after the win, he did hit his head pretty hard after he jumped into that there kangaroo head." He gestured to a stuffed kangaroo head, slightly above the dartboard.

"Don't you think you should call an ambulance?"

"Good idea," as the bartender shuffled away to a telephone. As he went to the kitchen, he passed by a very conspicuious (though empty) cardboard box labeled, "1000 kazoos."

The man was not seriously injured. An impromptu survey of 100 bars in Peninsularia, Monte Carlico, Untitled, Borderville, and Kazoo City indicated that at least 9% of bars had similar incidents, with one fatality. The fatality was Bob Janny, 91, of Monte Carlico. Bob won a K$1,000,000 slot machine payout at one of Monte Carlico's famed casinos, and went to a bar to celebrate, and watch the game with approximately 500 other Kazoo fans.

According to the police report, Janny had apparently stepped on a table so he could see the 52-inch television. Upon seeing the second goal at the 89-minute mark, when it appeared to be another draw for the Kazoo Peoples, (which would put them in second to Dagabom, who won earlier that day 1-0 over Dehny), Janny jumped, hit his head on the ceiling, and fell to the ground, dead.

The coroner's report stated that Janny died from "a combination of a heart attack, and a concussion." Investigators at UKazoo are trying to figure out how this is possible. The report went on to say that Janny was probably "having the best day of his life."

The poll also concluded that 18% of bars had at least one incident that resulted in injuries. 50% of the said incidents were head-bumping related, 33% had choking incidents (all of which involving the Ministry-provided kazoos), and 17% had trampling incidents, as the victims bent over to tie their shoe or pick up loose change, only to have the bar around them explode in national pride.

At a press conference to announce their new "FEAR THE KAZOO" media campaign to further promote The Kazoo Peoples' appearences in both the Baptism of Fire and WC26, Assistant to the Minister of Sport, Hoobert Heever, announced that the Ministry would pay all medical expenses related to the free kazoos, expected to be around K$3,000,000.

Jonny Lampshade, kicker of the winning goal, offered to pay for any medical expenses to any victims of trampling or head-bumping incidents. He later retracted the offer after receiving over 42,000 e-mails in six hours after the announcement was made. He did, however, decide to pay for Bob Janny's funeral costs.

The match's tone was set at the 22-minute mark, when midfielder Perknowleski gave up the ball to Chadd Johnson, who promptly put it into the net, his second goal of the Batism of Fire.

But Keyshona would not take this matter lightly, slapping in a goal eight minutes later at the 30-minute mark.

It looked as if the Kazoo Peoples would walk away after the second matchday in second place in region 2, due to a Dagabom win, but a 89-minute goal changed all that.

A corner kick was awarded to the Kazoo Peoples after the ball was hit out. Chadd Johnson kicked it to Jonny Lampshade, who headed the ball into the goal.

Leaderboard:
Goals:
2 Chadd Johnson
1 Jonny Lampshade

Assists:
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Chadd Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists+Goals:
3 Chadd Johnson
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Jonny Lampshade
1 Mark Perknowleski

[[OOC: I am allowed to ask the RP bonus I received, if any... or is that a secret?.... chalk it up to a cluess n00b, if this is a stupid question.]]

East Lithuania ties, but still unable to score!


Couch Discolo is mad. His forwards have been unsuccessful in scoring even 1 goal. They don't know wheither it has been good opponent goal keeping, or horrible play by the 3 forwards. What another disappointment is that Crystal still failed on scoring on a penelty shot. This, which has happend twice, once which could tie and this one at 89 minutes which could win it, has to be a killing for the East Lithuania team. However, Weaver was able to hold it to a tie despite the forwards bad playing so far. He was the reason that East Lithuania's ope of going farther then the group stage is still, though not high, alive.

"We need to do better on offence, period." said Couch Discolo. "Shooting, passing, everything. If we are going to score one point in this tournament, we need to work on those things." Discolo also pointed out that this wasn't the only tournament. "The World Cup's compatition is 100 x's greater then this. Not scoring a goal here will really affect us there."

GK Weaver also talked. "I'm glad with my prformence and the defences. If our offence would score a goal, it makes me try harder to not let one go through. When I hold this game to a tie, I am proud, but I feel bad that the offence could do anything either."

Hello all

sorry for my delay bin laid low with a nasty flu bug....

As we are newcomers we are delighted to have this oppertunity to gain experiance in the run up for the world cup.

Here is the rooster for Cataduanes 'Seleccion'.

Jose Manua (coach)
A legend on the domestic league where he led Alcantara to 4 sucessive league titles and soem 7 cup triumphs.


Adolfo Mumbalo (Goalkeeper) (Ardar)
First chioce for the national side, been on impressive form in the domestic league.
Jose Sullop (Goalkeeper) (Villa Merida)
talented young keeper playing back up for Mumbalo.

Butch Tumitubo (Leftback Defender) (Minas)
Butch by name, Butch by nature, the captain of the national side and for Minas in the domestic league. highly respected at home but like all of the side unknown internationally.
Francisco Mumbalo (Rightback Defender) (La Union)
Seen as the sucessor to Tumitubo for the captaincy.
Carlos Suramaga (Central Defender) (La Union)
Old veteran.
Antonio Briganti (Central Defender) (Alcantara)
Much travelled journeyman is a non nonsense defender.
Filipe Echevarria (Rightback/Center defender) (La Union)
Youngster has been impressive showing much potential.

Alonso Corino (left midfield) (La Union)
Star of La Union and acclaimed as the most technically accomplished of the Cataduanos.
Marco Ruedas (right midfield) (Minas)
The pin up of the east of the island where his club, Minas, draw there support. good technique but more noted for his pace.
Andres Chavicano (defensive midfielder) (Deportivo Corto)
The enforcer, known for a penchant for hard tackling and off the ball incidents.
Ferdinando Alomar (central midfield) (Ardar)
The playmaker, wonderful range of passing and trickery but i wee bit slow in pace.
Toni Souletano (defnesive midfielder) (Sakhayos)
Youngster from unfashionable Sakhayos, impressed during the clubs first season in the top flight, earning a call up.
Benidicto Villa (central midfielder) (La Union)
Utility player with excellent stamina and strength

Guillermo Bata (striker) (La union)
Big center forward, good in the air but lacks pace.
Carlos Gaurin (Striker) (Alcantara)
This youngster is the heart and soul of his club, small and nippy with terrific pace and skills, however lacks strength and stamina.
Agustin Macalinao (striker) (San Fermin)
Left footed stiker with exceptional ball skills and pace, however is injury prone.
Innocento Balumaman (striker) (Minas)
Old veteran called up as the back up for the strike force.

The side are most likely going to play a 4-4-2 with the following starting.

A,Mumbalo - GK

Tumitubo - DL ' Captain'
Echevarria - DC
Suramaga - DC
F.Mumbalo - DR

Corino - ML
Chavicano -MC
Alomar - MC
Ruedas - MR

Macalinao - L CF
Guarin - R CF

bench:
Sullop - GK
Briganti - DC
Souletano - MC
Villa - MC
Bata - SC


My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers N
Godmod Scoring Events Y, within reason
RP injuries to my players Y
Godmod injuries to my players Y
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players N
Godmod Other Events N

[OOC: I know approximately jackshit about scorination. If I'm meant to have allotted 'points' or something, do say.]

----

"...but, after the application of three tubs of vaseline and eight hours of firm tugging, the fire service were eventually able to retrieve the hamster. Kibby was said to be dazed, but in good spirits."

[Kash Yashrin shuffles his papers, and smiles toothily at the camera.]

"And now, after the Goats' dramatic victory last night, we bring you a special report from Bobo Mennewesit, direct from Rejistanian. Bobo."

[The screen cuts to Bobo, wrapped up in a dark coat, and with a gaudy "Go Go Goats!" scarf draped around his thick neck, standing in an empty stadium.]

"Thanks Kash. Well, after last night's excitement, it was back to work for the Goats today."

[Pictures of the players dribbling round cones, practising penalties, and talking to Metrufnit. Menneswit speaks over the footage.]

"Midfield dynamo Urga Urga did not train today, resting his knee after sustaining damage during an altercation with a drunken fan last night, but I can now confirm that he has been ruled fit to play against Errinundera tomorrow. Fergo Metrufnit will be wanting to put out the strongest team possible, of course, for the encounter with the present group leaders. I talkedd to him earlier,"

[Cut back to Menneswit.]

"And he was certainly confident that we'll be seeing a strong performance from everyone tomorrow. Driv will, of course, be sitting out, after the GFA's appeal was ruled "time-wasting, pathetic, and staggeringly stupid" by the authorities. As expected, he will be bolstering the defence, giving young Vornol Behethzen his first team. Speaking to him earlier, here's what he had to say."

[Cuts to Behethzen, a tall, slim young man, dabbing anxiously at his blonde hair with chewed fingernails.]

"Yeah, well, it's a great opportunity, innit. I've always dreamed of playing at this level, innit, and well, yeah, it's a great opportunity. Innit."

"So, you watched Errinundera beat Hurleyland today. How do you think you'll fare tomorrow?"

"I think we'll kill 'em, innit. It's a great opportunity."

"And your thoughts on the team at present? Anyone who you're concerned about, or who you think's playing especially well?"

"Yeah, well, it's a great opportunity for all of us, and I think everyone's really risen to the task, innit, and taken it with both hands, and we've all really got our eye on the ball, innit."

[Cuts back to Menneswit.]

"Vornol Behethzen there, speaking about tomorrow's game with Errinundera. He also praised the work of the Goat Girls, the cheerleading squad who got the crowd going for the first match, expressing his hopes that they would do so again, and adding that he'd 'really like to fuck them'. The Goats will be wearing their distinctive green and purple strip again. The match kicks off at 1.30, and we'll have live coverage from twenty minutes before the game. Kash."

[Cuts to a green screen, showing the expected line up.]


Poschelkin

NiwetzY Behethzen Treth (c) Peen

Willian DnisiY Urga Coccilianata

P. Brebst Geff

< as you flip through the satellite channels.. you come across a mildly amusing commercial.. as it end you hear the familiar five note opening jingle with an announcer's voice under.>

ANCR: NVNN presents.. the Baptism of Fire post-match report. Brought to you by "Dicken's Cider... next time you want to want to meet that girl at the bar.. just tell her she needs some Dicken's Cider ."
Now, your hosts, Chris Blurrmen and Keith Oldermann...

<the lights soften from the NVNN trademark bright blue to show two men sitting at the desk.. Chris, the veteran announcer, now heavier and older than his glory days of the 1980s and Keith, with ovesized circle-rim glasses and greying hair.>

CHRIS: Day number two equals win number one.
KEITH: Or day number two equals goals three and four.
CHRIS: No matter how fuzzy the math is, or how fuzzy your head is, Northern Voobaha has international win number one in the books.
KEITH: And the celebrations are continuing from Kellnersville to AnTir... we'll take you back to the NorVoos' locker room for live reaction in just a moment..
CHRIS: First and foremost... show me the goals!
<video under>
CHRIS: Opening half.. Winston Dutchin on the near side.. vicious tackle by a Star Signs defender... Dutchin clutching his left knee in agony.. out comes the yellow card..
KEITH: that's the knee that he's been having trouble with dating back to the domestic game with Wikata two months ago...
CHRIS: ensuing free kick...Steve "what can" Brown "do for you?".. GOOOOOOOOOALLLL!!!!!
KEITH: evidently Brown can do anything he wants.. the Blue Candle goes up one nil.
About ten minutes later.. still first half.. NV on the rush.. Melby the feed ahead.. looking for Dutchin.. he tries to make a hard cut and DOWN GOES DUTCHIN! DOWN GOES DUTCHIN! DOWN GOES DUTCHIN!
CHRIS: shades of Joe Frazier....
KEITH: Dutchin blows out his MCL.. his tournament is over. Dutchin out, Moeschler in.
CHRIS: It's a move that will pay off... Star signs will tie it with a late first half goal... we'll move to the second half... and again, Melby setting up from midfield... quick pass to Kendara.. the feed ahead to Moeschler... he splits the defenders on the run.. and the chip GOOOOOOOOOOALLLLLLLLL!
"Thriller" finds the back of the net from 20 meters out.. and of course.. the moonwalk dance after... The Blue Candle gets thier first international win. and more importantly.. moves into a points tie a top the dangerous Group 4 , but behind CI and StarSigns on goal differential. Now the Blue look forward to tomorrow's match with the dangerous, yet winless Firania.
KEITH: But the loss of Winston Dutchin... how big is that of a blow against the team?
CHRIS: As the late Jim Croce once sang.. "If I could save time in a bottle.."
which really has nothing to do with soccer.. or Dutchin's injury...
KEITH: so on that note.. for Mix Master Chris B, I'm Keith Oldermann.. continuing coverage of the NorVoos win continues on NVNN2 and our Voobahian language partner NVNN Atletik.
CHRIS: Good night from Kellnersville.
<the music fades in.. as the lights return the set to the opening blue glow...>

Falcons debut in style, 1:0

Sixty two minutes passed from the moment Hakan el Dajani took the opening kickoff and there was still no score despite the team's stated mission of playing attacking style football. The young midfield and forwards couldn't pierce the defence playing in front of them for that long stretch of time until midfielder Hasse Ayanbede made a nimble run into the 18 yard box and was fouled.

Hakan el Dajani proved why he was named one of the two starting forwards for the Falcons by slamming the ball past the diving goalkeeper into the top right corner of the net for Majeristan's first-ever international goal and the veteran defence and goalkeeper Khari Hasenjafi made the lead hold up for Majeristan and the Falcons walked away from their international debut match with a 1:0 result.

"It was good to get our first match out of the way and the full three [points]," Coach Avid Mashoda said. "We started to get our legs under us after about 30 minutes in and you saw the difference as the match wore on."

Majeristan ended up with narrow advantages in several statistics, such as time of possession (46 minutes to 44), shots (11 to 10), shots on goal (five to four) and corners (four to three), but they led the one statistic Mashoda cares about: the final score. The team played sluggish football immediately out of the gate to start the first half and conceded their first two shots on goal just four minutes into the match.

"We played like a team that didn't know what to expect at the international level," Hasenjafi said. "After that second shot, I just told them to steady themselves and play like we practice. That's when things seemed to solidify a little bit."

The Falcons (1-0-0, three points) face Amorah, who fell to group favourites Tanah Burung in a match the Falcons hope wore out their opponents going into the critical Matchday Three.

"We're going to be at the mythical halfway point of this stage," el Dajani said. "We need three point results as much as possible, especially before we face Tanah Burung."

The Schiavone Scribe
SCHIAVONIA WIN OPENING INTERNATIONAL
Schiavonia 1-0 Language Teachers

Tony Tarmey wrote his name into Schiavone football folklore last night as he scored the first ever goal for our national team in Rejistania.

And what a moment it was for the young Welkay Lakeside striker. Fifty-eight minutes were on the clock when CJ Moore curled a corner from the Schiavone right, a Language Teacher (Herr Schmitt, German) headed the ball back out to Moore, then, WHOOSH! Another cross zipped in, off the head of an onrushing Tarmey and past a helpless Language Teacher of a goalkeeper (Misseur D'Eauz, French).

It meant that Schiavonia were one-nil up, a scoreline that would hold out until the final whistle.

The whole episode was one which made everyone in Orange and Scarlet in the Stadium, as well as the millions watching back home, proud that their people were finally being represented by a team at the highest level. A national team.

From the moment the eleven walked onto the pitch, the playing of the national anthems, the short warm up before kick-off, the first whistle, the first Schiavone attack (from which Gary Topp skimmed the top of the baar with a header), the first important block (made by Arnold O'Kane), the first opposition booking (Haxu'he, Rejistanian, who became the villain of the Schiavone support for the rest of the match), half-time, Tarmey's goal, the final onslaught from the teachers, throughout which Oliver Park and Gareth Marsden looked barely toubled, the final whistle, and the Schiavone celebration that ensued. You could have been mistaken that they'd just beaten Sarzonia to win the World Cup final, not a comparitively unimportant fixture against some part-time multilingualists.

One person not getting too carried away was Schiavonia's manager (Mister Rodney Lowe, English).

"I know everyone's really happy that we won, but there's a long road to be walked. We've probably just played the weakest team in the group, and only beaten them one-nil. We've got a very tough game agianst Hainan next, and then it won't get any easier against Palacetonia and Thergo. But the boys will take each game in their stride, and hopefully we'll reach our ultimate goal of winning this whole tournament."

Schiavonia are now in second place in Group Six, three points behind Hundred-Percent Hainan. We only hope that they won't be Hundred-Percent Hainan after our next game!

Ratings: Kershaw 7; O'Kane 7, Park 8, Marsden 8, Smith 7; Sanderson 7, Jones 7, Moore 8; Topp 8, Schiavone 6 (Payne [64 min] 7), TARMEY 9.

Final Score:
Schiavonia 1 (Tarmey 58)
Language Teachers 0

Group 6 Pl W D L F A Pts GD
1. Hainan 2 2 0 0 6 2 6 +4
2. Schiavonia 1 1 0 0 1 0 3 +1
3. Thergo 2 1 0 1 1 3 3 -2
4. Palacetonia 1 0 0 1 2 3 0 -1
5. Language Teachers 2 0 0 2 0 2 0 -2



SFF Search for team nickname

In a blatant copy of what a number of teams have done in the past, SFF President Michael Ford will today launch a competition for potential nicknames for the Schiavone national team.

"We're fed up of just being repetively being called the 'national team'. I mean, it isn't very original, is it? You could be talking about anyone." Ford told us.

"What we need is something that sounds good alongside our nation's name, but also something that is essentially Schiavone. Essentially relaxed, but with a sense of togetherness, and always willing to celebrate if we get the opportunity."

"One thing, though. Don't anyone enter the name "Lions". There's enough Lions in the game already without another one."

The Eastern Times
Hainan Jumps to 2-0; First Place

Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 6 2 0 0 6:2 4
2. Schiavonia 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
3. Thergo 3 1 0 1 1:3 -2
4. Palacetonia 0 0 0 1 2:3 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Hainan's introduction into international sports has started off as good as it can possibly get. Their first Baptism of Fire Cup, which is the predecessor to the actual World Cup, Hainan has pulled off two victories against it's division mates. The first victory took place against Palacetonia, in a close match-up. Hainan came out on top by scoring 3 goals to Palacetonia's 2 goals. Thergo was an easier match, with a 3-0 victory over it's opponents. Despite the easier victory, Hainan still considers Thergo a threat within it's group.

"One victory against Thergo doesn't mean anything. Sure, we came out on top this time; however, it doesn't mean that Thergo doesn't have a good team. Especially with this victory, they're going to be seeking revenge against us, and will likely play much harder within the group to knock us out of first place. We definitely cannot under-estimate any of the teams within our group. We need to work even harder over the remaining matches to maintain our place at the top of the division, and to establish ourselves as a possible opponent in the World Cup."

The schedule for group stage is:

MD1: Palacetonia 2 Hainan 3
MD2: Thergo 0 Hainan 3
MD3: Schiavonia vs Hainan
MD4: Language Teachers vs Hainan
MD5: Off

With Schiavonia in second place, the 3rd match day against their opponent could ultimately decide the top positions within the group. Hainan will have to step it up even more, in order to keep their position secure as the best in the group. With Schiavonia's recent victory, the head coach of Hainan knows that the next match is going to be a lot harder than the previous matches.

Another strike against the Hainan team is the fact that they play five matches in a row, without a break in between them. The only good that may do is if Hainan makes it into the next round of play within the Baptism of Fire, which gives them a break between each rounds. If not, the day off would be useless to the team.

Qutar Sports News Network

Good Morning Qutar, it looks like the players are ready to come out onto the pitch. They line up on the half way line, and first the Qutari anthem is to be played, the players filled with pride to play for their country, particularly David Parker playing in his first international match for his country. And now the national anthem of Pyrologists911, their players standing proud. It looks like Chris Saunders has won the toss and Qutar are to kick off the first half.

The referee blows his whistle as Qutar's second international game is underway, they seem to be starting strongly, Thomas passes to Parker with his first touch of the match, he's moving strongly down the right side of the field, he gets past one defender and he gets a cross in, it meets the head of Ali, oh tipped over the bar by the Pyrologists911's goalkeeper, good save there. Its Tomlin to take the corner, he whips it into box and it meets the glove of the keeper, who can only punch it as far away as Chris Saunders, who drives in a shot and oh of the post, he'd beaten the keeper but not the post. The keeper starts play off again, manages to get it up to his midfield, who makes Pyrologists911 first attacking move of the game, the number 8 manages to get it through to the number 11, oh great tackle by Lemkes cutting out that move, and sends it straight back where it came from. Parker latches onto the pass, and moves down the right wing, he's being closed down he neatly passes it back to Chris Saunders, who see's Ali making a run passes it straight on, oh Ali's through the defence he's goal, he shoots, he scores!!! 1-0! Qutar have taken the lead 20 minutes into the game. Oh the fans are going wild.

Now the atmosphere is electric as Pyrologists911 kick off play again, they try to make moves forward but Gordon cuts out a pass, and immediately on the counter he passes to Thomas, who runs down the pitch outpacing the defence, oh there's only one defender left he goes for the tackle, Thomas jumps over the tackle and he's through on goal, chips it over the outcoming keeper, oh no its hit the post again and the keeper recover the ball. The post isn't liking the Qutar team tonight, not at all. Its seems that Pyrologists911 have re-grouped after that incident, as Qutar's midfield isn't having a much luck penetrating the opposing half. Oh it looks like Pyrologists911 are making a move, the number 10 is closing down onto Nick Saunders, Saunders gets the tackle in, oh the number 10 has just hacked down, oh the referee didn't see that as the number goes for the shot neatly saved by Stone, who boots it out of play as Saunders seems to be in pain. The stretcher is being brought on, its seems that he'll be taken off for the moment, Pyrologists911 throw the ball back to Stone, who sends it up the field to Tomlin who makes a run up the left side of field, gets the cross in onto the head of Ali, who heads it toward the bottom left corner of the goal, oh great save there, and it goes off for a corner. It looks like Saunders is coming back on the pitch, and looking at the clock this might be the last kick of the first half, Tomlin takes the corner gets into Thomas who heads it just wide, and the referee has blown the whistle for the end of the first half.

Going into the second half Qutar are looking the much stronger team, and with the crowd behind them and a kinder post, it seems a least another goal is inevitable. As Pyrologists911 kick off the seem to have lost heart as they lose possession almost immediately with Chris Saunders intercepting the ball, and getting the ball up to Thomas who makes his rum through the midfield, he has Ali in support, but he's going the whole way, he's skipped through the defence, he chips it over the keeper, and its a goal!! 2-0, the crowd are going crazy, and so are us commentators.

It looks like Paul Dove is going to change up the team up bit with Olliver Smith coming on for John Gordon who has performed well so far in the match, and I think he's just being given a rest, and as Pyrologists911 kick off again it seems that some of their fans are leaving the stadium already only 50 minutes into the game, and Pyrologists911 head forwards, but Smith tackles possession back, and heads up the pitch, oh he's striding forwards, he's going all the way, oh he's been brought down by the number 3 defender, and the referee has no choice but to book him, and a direct free kick has been awarded just outside the penalty box. It looks like Chris Saunders to take to free kick, oh referee is having to make to Pyrologists911 players get the right yards back, he runs up and oh! He hits the crossbar and safely into the keepers hands. Its looks like Qutar are relaxing with their two goal advantage, as the clock is heading towards 80 minutes, and with ten minutes left on the clock it doesn't seem like Pyrologists911 have any chance of getting anything out of this, oh hang on they have broken through the defence, and the number 11 is one on one with Stone, oh what a brilliant save by Stone, the number 11 has gone down surely the referee won't fall for this, WHAT! He has! Penalty awarded to Pyrologists911! It seems that the cheating number 11 is going to take his ill gotten penalty, he goes for the shot, oh what a save he had to really reach for that but Stone saves the penalty! Oh the team are mobbing him! What a Save! The referee blows his whistle for the end of the match and the crowd go even more ecstatic Qutar have won their first match and are top of the table for Region 7.

The Islands of Qutar 2 (1) - (0) 0 Pyrologists911
Ali, 21
Thomas, 49

Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Islands of Qutar 3 1 0 1 4:3 1
2. Bazalonia 3 1 0 0 3:2 1
3. Fbrenia 3 1 0 0 1:0 1
4. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

After their triumphant opening day, er, defeat, where they at least managed to score, journalists from all over the world were eager to find out more about the Wentland team. Both of them turned up to an impromptu press conference with boss Edgar Bluff and the squad to inquire.

“In numerical order, lads,” called Bluff. Some shuffles and the manager started to introduce the side.

“Number one, in goal, Jack Edmunds. 34 years old. Star goalie for Warpstone. They’re our Champions, you know. Kept 12 clean sheets last year. Great record on pennos. Saved 8 out of 12. No getting past him.”

“Big lad, how tall is he?”

“Six five. And you can see built like a brick privy.

“Numbers two and three, the twins, one on each flank at the back, Ron and Don Fletcher. 25 years old with an almost psychic view of what each other’s doing. Pacy and decent with crosses. We need to watch Don’s temper, though. He’s first choice left back but prone to suspension. Four red cards in the last two years. They’re both at Donington Wanderers.

“Four, the little centre-half Benny Jones. Not huge but a prodigious leaper. Also a great distributor of the ball. We use the big ‘un next to him to get the ball to him and Benny threads ‘em through to the front. Who is the big ‘un? Our huge number 5. The one man taller than Jack. You don’t mess with him...boxed for the Army, y’know. Gus Jenkins. Captain. Kicks like a mule. Takes the pens given half a chance. Works well with Benny, his team-mate at Great Bellstead. Occasionally mistimes a tackle but the forwards don’t bother him after then, yknow? Both joined the Bells as trainees, both been there for, what, ten years now. Dead loyal.

“Number six is one of our central midfielders, Harry Ollis, another one from Warpstone. Mid-twenties. Tigerish in midfield. Good passer.

“Number seven is our right-winger, Will James. Can run 100 yards in ten and a half seconds. Sometimes has to wait for everyone to catch him up. Doesn’t score that often but delivers a good cross. Plays at Donington so he and Ron know what each other is doing, they swap over when one is on the overlap.

“Number eight. Aaah, the key. Frank Treves. This kid has more natural talent than anyone in Wentland. Let’s see how he does. Seventeen, but worth a punt. Scored on his debut, scored 4 goals in his second ever match. He’s only at tiny Alumgreen, but they’ve gone from 2nd division relegation candidates to the brink of promotion to the top flight. And they got to the Cup semis last year for the first time ever. Mainly thanks to his goals. 28 in his 22 games last year. Just an amazing finisher. Not flashy, but predatory. But you saw how he played earlier, what a goal.

“We’ll see how he teams up with the centre-forward, Billy Morgan. He’s 31 and seen it all in Wentland. Champion again last year with the Stones. Old fashioned, good in the air, gets on the end of the crosses bombing over.

“Number ten is our other midfield star. Another young one, 21 years old, Joe Weston, but inexhaustible. Him and Harry don’t take any prisoners. Plays at Royal Heath, runners-up last year.

“Number eleven is another one from the Heathens, our left-winger Tom Devey. Scored the winner in the Cup final last year. Likes to cut in from the left to deliver pinpoint passes or even have a dig. Only 20 so we don’t want to overplay him.

“Those are the first choices to wear the Wentland blue in the Fire Cup. We’re hoping to do ourselves justice. Football is so popular in Wentland, we’ve just never had the guts to step forward and have a go. Avoiding the first plane home is the number one priority.”

By this time the pair of hacks - now joined by a morose pigeon - were yawning and showing contempt. Edgar pretended not to notice as he handed out a sheet with all the details on. “Here’s the other lads in the squad, look and read at leisure. Orthodox 4-4-2, get the crosses in.”

The hacks took the papers gladly and bundled off. “Some website will be interested in this rubbish” remarked one. Another put it up on ebay but after a week there were no bids. The indifference suited Edgar, no-one would notice if they lost.

The other squad members:

12 Francis Derrington – goalie, 24, Royal Heath

13 Bob Henton – right-back, 35, Awkswell Road (“I had to pick him,” said Edgar, “he’s been such a good servant all these years”)

14 Alec Harris – left-back, 22, Downham

15 Bill Grosvenor – centre-half, 29, Warpstone

16 Gordon Corbett – centre-half, 22, Donington

17 Sam Barton – centre-midfield, 27, Gt Bellstead

18 Stan “The Man” Bailey – centre-midfield, 30, Downham (“can play anywhere, very useful on the bench”)

19 Roy Ferris – right-wing, 24, Southfield

20 Ken Davies – left-wing, 23, Warpstone

21 Ian Thwaites – centre-forward, 26, Warpstone

22 Martin Smith – centre-forward, 20, Royal Heath

23 Ben Tewkesbury – goalie, 27, Donington

Rolatians hyped up for World Cup 26
Redmofo, Rolatia: There is much excitement at the moment in Rolatia, as the national football team is on the edge of their first win in international football.

The squad of 26, including high-profile names such as goalkeeper David Ramar and right-back Timothy Arast has just played their first game in Reijstania in the Baptism of Fire pre-WC tournament. It was a 3-0 loss to Hoolabaloola, a blow for Rolatians everywhere.

However, it's not over yet.

With three games still to go, there is a good chance of Rolatia coming second or even first in their group and thus qualifying for the next round of the Baptism of Fire. The mood in Rolatia is one of tension and ecstacy, with hopes high after Rolatia's previous double championship in Formula 1 GP with Thomas Ragji and Team Rolatia.

Whatever the results, it'll be a momentous few weeks for Rolatia. This is the first time they have played internationally and professionally, with the first professional league running since 1958 this season - 66 teams took part in five divisions and two cups, with New Millwall topping the Premier League, Redmofo City taking the FA Cup after beating surprise finalists bottom of Division 1 Baroa United and the League Cup 2-1 in the final from New Millwall. They didn't take the second NSFA Cup spot - that went to Riato Rovers, who won 3-1 and 5-1 in a rather surprising result.

One of the major people who will be following and reporting his thoughts on Rolatia's BoF and WC progress is Prime Minister and noted blogger Dr Joseph Edwards on his site www.foxboys.rl. It's shaping up to be a great time for the public

Qutar Sports News Network

After thier second game and their first win in the Baptism of Fire tournament, the QFA have called a press conference to answer press questions on the match. The national manger had this to say on the team's performance;

"In this game, we managed to show what we couldn't show in our first game, and we showed that pretty convincingly today, we showed that we are a good team, who can take on the world. Me and the team are looking forward to the next match against Fbrenia"

Player Ratings

Peter Stone :: 10/10
Played very well in the match, pulled of that brilliant penalty save to keep his clean sheet.

Nick Saunders :: 8/10
Played solid in defence, put in the tackles when they were needed, no lapses this game.

Dominic Kelly :: 8/10
Played solid in defence, made some good tackles.

David Howell :: 7/10
Solid in defence, but again not in as much of the action as he could have been.

William Lemkes :: 8/10
Didn't have to do as much this game, but put the tackles in when needed.

Sam Tomlin :: 8/10
Made some good runs down the left wing, getting the crosses in, and cutting out the opposition's possesion.

Chris Saunders :: 8/10
Solid in the centre of midfield, and solid as a captain leading his team to victory and unlucky not to get a goal.

John Gordon :: 8/10
A solid partner in the centre of midfield with the captain, substituted off to rest him.

David Parker :: 8/10
Played an excellent first match, getting the crosses in and dancing down the pitch.

Ali :: 9/10
Another outstanding game for Qutar, with a goal to his name, and played well in the partnership with Thomas.

James Thomas :: 9/10
Played well with Ali, managed to get the goal he deserved and what a goal

Olliver Smith :: 8/10
Played well when he came on, proving that he's over he injury once and for all.

(OOC: This isn't all set right now. I think you can figure out when each piece is set - they're in chronological order. And phew - finally got the news articles and such done after god-knows how many problems)
www.foxboys.rl
Webblog to the Prime Minister!
My thoughts on the group stage in Region 8
Well, it's going to be a ground-breaking game tonight in Najajara Kali, no matter what the score is. It's going to be the first international game ever for Rolatia, and it's going to be the first game in a tough group that could make or break John Gatri.

First of all, we have tonight's opponents Hoolabaloola. Like a lot of our opponents, details are murky to the point they have failed to post a squad for the following matches yet - Gatri's going to have to hedge his bets and be ready for anything. It'll be tough and it's going to be a very close match - whoever is more ready and fit on the night will take it.

Next, we play Hurleyland. Another secretive team, we're going to have to be on top fitnesses to help secure victory - if we go down at Hoola and then here we're basically out of it. The players are going to be under considerable pressure to win it.

Third match - Gruenberg, our opponents that will pose us a major problem and are likely to beat us. I'm predicting they'll get first in this group as their squad looks very skilled on paper, and they've already got a 3-1 win in their first game against Hurleyland. I'm worried about pacy Urga - he could be a thorn in our side and could cause major trouble.

Finally, a crucial match in such a tight group: Errinundera. They've already won their first game against tomorrow's opponents Hoolabaloola 2-1 and are letting nothing slip about what they'll be using in the rest of the tournament (after the initial squad yesterday).

My analysis? I'm not particularly expecting us to top the group. I hope we could snag third or even second, and it's possible considering all the BoF teams are new to international tournaments, but I'm not going to bet my leadership on it (any of them!)

(OOC: OK, on this report I assume that if a nation has not logged in for three weeks onto Jolt yet logged in on NS within a few days and only has a single post - the signup post - I can godmod how I want)

The Rolatian Telegraph
The number one Rolatian broadsheet since 1864

Rolatia suffer badly in Hoolabaloola game
Rolatia today have been downed badly in their first Baptism of Fire game, with a 3-0 loss to Hoolabaloola putting a dent in hopes for a qualification through the group stage.

The match started decently for a full-strength Rolatian team, playing in a 4-3-1-2 formation - generally regarded as moderate attack by most football analysists inside Rolatia. There was a few chances very quickly, with a superb shot in the 7th minute by Tedd Verres being saved and an Elliot Dunkel cross being headed away in the 11th minute. The team started to quickly go downhill for there for the rest of the half, with the first goal coming from the main striker of Hoolabaloola, with a strike into the top-right sending Ramar the wrong way and putting Hoola 1-0 up after 25 minutes.

The strikers and wingers of the opposition continued to push forward, with Ramar saving about five different shots on goal before in the 44th minute, just before half-time, the opposing left-winger received a good cross from the opposing right-winger and headed it in to make it 2-0 at half time. The Rolatian fans were not happy, and the Hoolabaloolese jeering was not making them happier.

The game resumed with no major crowd trouble in the break. The Rolatians were a lot stronger after the break, and managed to hit a goal in in the 58th minute through just-subbed Oliver Morgan - however, it was to the dismay of Rolatian fans and players alike decreed offside by the referee. Salt was rubbed into the wounds already sustained when in the 62nd minute thanks to a ML-SC1 one-two the main striker hit his second goal in to make it 3-0 to Hoola. There was much willing on the man for a hat-trick, but it didn't happen to the relief of the Rolatians. The rest of the game was relatively uneventful - however, the opposing MC2 as well as Rogers and Saloir on the Rolatian side were yellow-carded for a minor scuffle.

The game ended 3-0 to Hoolabaloola, a very bad score for a Rolatian team who had just suffered a major morale knock thanks to this quick loss. The Rolatian manager Johnathan Gatri refused to comment tonight past "We had a bad game, and that's that. We're going to do better tomorrow."

Rolatia: Ramar 7, Arast 7, Byers 5 (sub 55 Rogers 4 (Yl)), Jojufag 5, Vokisp 6, Safalan 5, Dunkel 8, Kasfuh 4, Saloir 6 (Yl), Verres 7, Jasofiah 7 (sub 56 Morgan 8)
Unused Subs: Koigda, Koiraj, Smith

Hoolabaloola: GK 9, DR 8, DL 8, DC 6, DC 7, MR 8, ML 9 (Gl 1, MOM), MC1 8, MC2 6 (Yl) SC1 8 (Gl 2), SC2 7

Unused Subs: GK, DF, DF, MF, SC

www.foxboys.rl
Webblog to the Prime Minister!
Well, that was a fuck-up.
Well, we really messed up on that one. First game ever for the Rolatian international team and we lost THREE-NIL! Well, at least we saw some players show they're good on the international team - Ramar got some good saves in despite bad support, Dunkel and Verres showed they can be an effective pair and Morgan has shown he can perform up-front when he needs to. Here's to winning against Hurleyland et al!

RFA ANNOUNCEMENT
http://img521.imageshack.us/img521/250/federationlogo8nq.png (http://imageshack.us)
The Rolatian Football Association are pleased to announced that Jonathan Gatri has selected the squad for the next game.

GK: Ramar
DR: Arast
DL: Raksi
DC: Jojufag
DC: Vokisp
MR: Safalan
ML: Dunkel
MC: Kasfuh
AMC: Koigda
SC: Verres
SC: Morgan

SUB1: Rogers
SUB2: Jasiofah
SUB3: Koiraj
SUB4: Stephenson
SUB5: Byers


www.foxboys.rl
Webblog to the Prime Minister!
Team changes...
Gatri isn't messing about. Several players underperformed and they were straight onto the bench or worse. He's also done a bench reshuffle and got some more versatile players even than last time. He's giving out a message - Rolatia doesn't take crap!

Qutar Sports News Network

In a statement from the QFA tonight, the team sheet for the upcoming game against Fbrenia has been announced with an unchanged team from their last match against Pyrologists911. The manager is said he and the team were looking forward to the match and are in high spirits.

Team Roster

Starting Line-Up (4-4-2 Formation)
GK :: Peter Stone [1]
DEF :: Nick Saunders [2]
DEF :: Dominic Kelly [3]
DEF :: David Howell [4]
DEF :: William Lemkes [5]
MID :: Sam Tomlin [6]
MID :: Chris Saunders (Capt.) [7]
MID :: John Gordon [8]
MID :: David Parker [15]
ATK :: Ali [10]
ATK :: James Thomas [11]

On the Bench
GK :: Peter Turner [12]
DEF :: Amir Safavi [13]
DEF :: Alex Martin [14]
MID :: Nick Rogers [9]
MID :: Olliver Smith [16]
ATK :: Tom Siese [17]

Somewhere in a press room, a forgotten machine churned into life. The dust danced around as prehistoric paper spiralled out with dot printed red and blue engravured letters, a missive to the World Cup.

***AKBARIA TIMES***

The whole of Wentland has gone cup crazy. Blue and white ribbons bedeck the nation's cities and the Government has declared a national holiday for the match with Group A favourites Tanah Burung.

"We have two chances in this match. Slim and none," grinned Princess Melissa, keen footy fan and Honorary President of the Wentland FA. "But we will give our damnedest to come away with some sort of dignity."

"The betting has gone crazy," said media bookie Mickey the Shoe. "We made Wentland 6-1 but everyone's optimistic, the price has come down. Only Burlington Bertie, 100-30, against now."

Schools were preparing massive parties with kids dressed in the national kit and big screens to show the game. "We've not seen anything like it. We've come all this way and get a match with a massive nation like Tanah Burung. This will show how far we have come," said Aimee Mainwaring, headteacher at the Swiftsure Grammar. "Who would have thought it? Against former finalists."

The King sent a good luck message to the team and has promised he will be watching. As indeed will all Akbaria, willing the team on towards a narrow defeat.

***END TELEX***

It was 3.14am. A few hours later a cleaner snatched the paper with a bunch of other rubbish and popped it in her recycle bag.

[[OOC: I am allowed to ask the RP bonus I received, if any... or is that a secret?.... chalk it up to a cluess n00b, if this is a stupid question.]]
You are allowed to do so... you have the right to free speech... I however have the right to deduct your rank so much that any non-RPing n00b beats you 0:12, so it is maybe a good thing you didn't ask :>

(in short: yes, it is a secret)

Matchday 3

Presented by: KaliBank - the best for your money! Beat inflation with our derivates and options! People were able to double their savings! Others lost their savings completely due to underestimating the high risk of this investment form.

Majeristan 1 Amorah 2
Wentland 3 Tanah Burung 1

Dagabom 3 Keyshona 1
Southern Universe 1 The Kazoo Peoples 0

Havl 1 Apologetic Kittens 2
North Fenris 0 Legalese 3

Firania 0 Northern Voobaha 4
County Islands 0 Star Signs 3

The Ardenne 3 East Lithuania 1
Cataduanes 0 Beleminares 2

Schiavonia 0 Hainan 0
Palacetonia 1 Thergo 1

Fbrenia 0 The Islands of Qutar 2
Bazalonia 1 Pyrologists911 0

Rolatia 1 Hurleyland 1
Gruenberg 2 Errinundera 0

Region 1 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Amorah 6 2 0 1 5:4 1
2. Tanah Burung 6 2 0 1 4:3 1
3. Wentland 3 1 0 1 4:4 0
4. Majeristan 3 1 0 1 2:2 0
5. New Historia 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Dagabom 6 2 0 0 4:1 3
2. Southern Universe 4 1 1 0 2:1 1
3. The Kazoo Peoples 4 1 1 1 3:3 0
4. Dehny 1 0 1 1 1:2 -1
5. Keyshona 1 0 1 2 3:6 -3

Region 3 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Legalese 7 2 1 0 7:3 4
2. Apologetic Kittens 5 1 2 0 4:3 1
3. Basicota 1 0 1 1 2:3 -1
Havl 1 0 1 1 2:3 -1
5. North Fenris 1 0 1 1 0:3 -3

Region 4 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Northern Voobaha 6 2 0 1 8:4 4
2. Star Signs 6 2 0 1 6:2 4
3. Nezza 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
4. County Islands 3 1 0 1 3:5 -2
5. Firania 0 0 0 2 0:5 -5

Region 5 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Beleminares 7 2 1 0 6:0 6
2. The Ardenne 3 1 0 1 3:2 1
3. Cataduanes 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
4. Race City 3 1 0 1 1:4 -3
5. East Lithuania 1 0 1 2 1:4 -3

Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 7 2 1 0 6:2 4
2. Schiavonia 4 1 1 0 1:0 1
3. Thergo 4 1 1 1 2:4 -2
4. Palacetonia 1 0 1 1 3:4 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Islands of Qutar 6 2 0 1 6:3 3
2. Bazalonia 6 2 0 0 4:2 2
3. Fbrenia 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
4. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 2 1:3 -2
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

Region 8 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Gruenberg 6 2 0 0 5:1 4
2. Errinundera 6 2 0 1 3:3 0
3. Hoolabaloola 3 1 0 1 4:2 2
4. Hurleyland 1 0 1 2 2:5 -3
5. Rolatia 1 0 1 1 1:4 -3

East Lithuania Losses, But Score A Goal! (Finally)

The Great Whites fall again, however break their scoreless record by a goal from Jeff Hardy at 90+ after a pass from Varga lead to a one on one situation. The team now has a new goal... get one win before they pack up and leave for WC 26.

"We have one more game before we leave. I wanna win!" exclaimes FW Hardy. "I'm glad I scored, but I would laso like a win too."

GK Weaver felt disappointed. "Today wasn't my game. I let too many go by and that why we got an L today. Well, hopfully next time we build a little momentum before heading for the big one."

Offence:
MD Scott Varga- 1 Assist
FW Jeff Hardy- 1 Goal (90+)

Defence:
GK Jibreel Weaver- 29 saves, 4 let through

The Kazoo Peoples national team suffered its first international soccer tournament loss, to add to its collection of firsts (first draw/point, day 1; first win, day 2; first loss, day 3), as they lost to Southern Universe 1-0 earlier today.

Immediately following the game, coach Manni Aka had the following to say: "I'm still proud of our great team. I hope to bring back a win on day 5. We're gonna revamp our strategy, and we will advance to the knockout stage! It'll be our first group win to add to our list of firsts!"

Recent Nelson ratings for the telecasts of the Kazoos' draw on day 1 of the Baptism of Fire were announced today. Though there are 155 million residents, there are an estimated 57.7 million television households. A single ratings point represents 1%, or 577,000 households. The game had a rating of 67.0, or approximately 38,659,000 households, beating out other hit shows in its primetime timeslot. Such hit shows as CSI: Cake-Sniffing Instigators (rating of 22.0 normally, or approximately 12,694,000 households; down to a rating of 9.4, or approximately 5,424,000 households), hit real-time drama 34 (normally: 6.9|3,981,000; down to: 3.4|1,962,000), and popular gameshow Wheel of Wealth (normally: 5.9|3,404,000; down to 1.7|981,000) had all-time ratings lows. The Ministry of Sport further translated these numbers into how many people watching:

"This means that we had, assuming 3 people per household, over 115.9 million viewers, or approximately 75% watching our team. This just shows how much people love our team," said Hoobert Heever in a press release.

The team will enjoy an off day before returning to its final match on day 5.

"I think its best that we have an off day to reflect on our loss and improve. We plan on practicing for six and a half hours tomorrow to improve against tough opponent Dagabom [the current leader of Region 2] on day 5. Our fate is in our own hands. Whether or not we qualify for the knockout stage will be our own fault."

Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Dagabom 6 2 0 0 4:1 3
2. Southern Universe 4 1 1 0 2:1 1
3. The Kazoo Peoples 4 1 1 1 3:3 0
4. Dehny 1 0 1 1 1:2 -1
5. Keyshona 1 0 1 2 3:6 -3

Southern Universe set the pace for the game (and perhaps, the fate) by scoring after 8 minutes. It appeared the Kazoos were downtrodden, and possibly worried they would not score against a tough Southern Universe defense.

Southern Universe scored after goalkeeper Jim Johnson blocked a shot, but did not fall on the ball, allowing a Southern Universe striker to rush to penalty box and tip it in.

"I feel solely responsible for the loss, letting that goal get in," he said later.

There were only 2 shots on the goal by the Kazoo Peoples, and only one was on target.

"We really need to work on our offense," Manni Aka said.

"2 for 2" by Nev Gould

The Bazalopes have won 2 out of 2 of their Baptism of Fire matches, The only team in their group that is keeping in touch with the Bazalopes is the Islands of Qutar, who lost to us on the first Matchday but have won their next two matches. Bazalonia is not only on the top of their groups table but also on the top of the World. Assistant Coach Jayne Heart had this to say about their performance in the Baptism of Fire. "I can't believe we've done this well, Anthony Creek should have not had been given the Red card." The instance that Jayne refered to was in the 15th minute of the 2nd half. Anthony had "accidentaly" tackled the umpire while attempting to steal the ball from a Pyrologist forward. In the after match press conference Anthony said "The umpire just should not have been that close to the action. It was not my fault that he got tackled, It seemed he trying to protect the Pyrologist defender... Whoever he was."
Bazalonia kept the Pyrologists from scoring and Michael Irchov scored Bazalonia's only goal for the match which was scored just 20 seconds before halftime.

Could Bazalonia come out on top of the group? Well.. It certianly seems very possible. But will the unity of the splinted team last for long. Only time will tell. The Bazalopes next match will be Fbrenia, they are one spot below Bazalonia on the group rankings and just like Bazalonia have already had their bye. So This is probably the most important match for Bazalonia in the BoF, Will we remain undefeated? or will we fail and fall to our internal squaballings? With this thought is where I will leave it for now.

-Hallo Ken.
-Hallo Bill.
-Well, here we are again.
-Another matchday.
-Pub’s getting a bit crowded.
-Yeah, there’s a few more than usual.
-Couple of pints, please, Dave.
-Mike’s here as well.
-And Jill and Keri. Gang’s all here.
-Kick-off shortly. We’re gonna be slaughtered.
-You never know, if Frankie T gets going.
-You’re putting too much pressure on him. He’s still at school.
-Same line-up as last time.
-They’ve gone 3-5-2. Trying to nullify the wing threat.
-Weston’s getting stuck in already.
-He’ll have to watch getting booked. Four minutes and two fouls.
-Yeah, but their number six is not looking too chipper.
-Not creating too much.
-That’s good, stifle the game, don’t let them get control.
-Hold up, here’s a chance.
-HIT IT!!!
-Oh, good save.
-Watch the counter. Oh, Donnie’s slipped.
-One-on-one…
-Pheeewww. Well held, Jackie.
-Calm it down. Calm it down.
-We’re getting overrun in the middle. We need to use the flanks.
-Or long-ball it.
-Think we’re doing it now. Over the top.
-I’m going to the loo. Beat the half-time rush.
-Back now. What was that yell? Did I miss anything?
-Not much.
-Only Jamesy on a burst and slinging it over.
-And Morgan the Mighty burying the header.
-1-0. And there’s the whistle. Half-time.

-Second half. They’ve taken off their number six.
-Weston crunched him early doors. He’ll do the same for the replacement.
-This half’s gonna be a siege. Can’t believe we’re winning.
-They’ve gone more attacking. Almost 4-3-3.
-Yeah, that number ten’s just behind the forwards.
-Well in, Gus.
-No, he’s given a free-kick. Never was.
-Curled around the wall…
-…of the post…JUST KICK IT!!!
-Aaaand away. Pheeew.
-Another corner. Get it away!
-Ooooh…Jack’s mis-punched…
-…off the line!!! Well done Ronnie.
-C’mon, Wents. Anywhere will do.
-We need some pressure up front.
-Bailey’s coming on, Billy’s off. What we have we hold.
-Can’t help thinking this is a mistake. They’ve got less to fear now.
-Here’s a chance. Go on Jamesy.
-No-one in the middle, he has to have a go.
-Ach, well wide.
-CONCENTRATE!!! They’ve got an overlap!
-Great cross…off the post!!!
-C’mon, only 10 minutes to go…
-or 600 seconds…is that quicker?
-Not much injury. Weston’s off, Grosvenor on, going 5 across the back.
-Watch it – the reorganization might put them off…
-Great clearance. Hang on, Frankie’s flicked it past their number five…
-One on one from 30 yards. Go on, Frankie.
-He’s in two minds…hit it!!!
-No, look right! Devey!
-FOUND him! He can’t miss!
-TWO-NIL!!!!!!
-Oh jeez, how long now?
-Six minutes. It’s like the Somme now.
-They’ve put on another striker. Frankie’s off, Smith on for nuisance value.
-Or resting Frankie, another match soon.
-Dammit, another corner, that’s four in a row.
-Clear it…
-damn. Good header.
-How long now?
-We’re in injury. Surely not now, we’ve come so close…
-More corners. Four minutes injury? He’s having a laugh.
-Off the line again. Ronnie’s been a star.
-No-one in their half. Other than the goalie.
-And he’s coming up for this corner. Come ON, it’s time.
-Oooh, great punch Jackie boy!
-Hang on, Jamesy’s got it – and he’s got NO-ONE in front of him!!!
-Take it to the corner, Jamesy, no need for…oh, he’s hit it from 35 yards…
-…and it’s…IIINNNN!!!!
-I don’t believe it. I just don’t believe it.
-They’ve collapsed on the pitch. No-one can move. It’s over.
-We’ve done it. We’ve only gone and done it.
-Aah, never in doubt.

Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 7 2 1 0 6:2 4
2. Schiavonia 4 1 1 0 1:0 1
3. Thergo 4 1 1 1 2:4 -2
4. Palacetonia 1 0 1 1 3:4 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2


*ooc*
If my opponent rp first, they may not godmod anything but are welcome to choose scorers, yellows and reds.

IC
Daily Herald

Today, the Palacetonia National Team have gained their first points. Pippa Wallis is on fire and scored her second of the Tournament. A tough match against resolute opponents has lead to controversy after Wayne Owen expressed his displeasure at being subbed in the 58 minute by pushing the coach, Iain Corder. This came after rumours of a training ground bust-up between Clive Arty and Corder.

The goal for Palacetonia came after the 88th minute behind for most of the match; after a stupid mix up involving Trev Park and Virgil Claus which allowed the ball to dribble over the line in the 8th minute; Wallis and Mark Kennedy combined to play a one-two which enabled the offside trap to be sprung and Wallis had no compunction in slotting the ball home. Her celebration was unique to say the least and will probably be the talking point of the year. See page 3 for pictures.

Owen had been gradually losing his temper all throughout the match. A couple of rash tackles meant he was lucky not to have been sent off on two occasions before the 34 minute getting away with just a yellow. He was roundly booed by section of the crowd which only aggravated him. After being replaced by David Fraser to create a more attacking 4-3-3 formation, he pushed his way past Corder who stumbled and tripped over the bench landing in an undignified heap.

This substitution led to more freedom on the width which enabled Palacetonia to gradually dominate the game carving chances after chances and eventually the equalising goal.

Other yellow cards went to Williams for diving in the penalty box and Alex Canady for time wasting in the 92nd minute.

In the post-match press conference, Corder was asked about whether he was looking forward to seeing the push again. At which point, the conference ended with a walk-out of the PFA's officials. A microphone accidentally left on caught the President of the PFA muttering something about unhelpful reportage.

LineUps

GK Wes Tray
D Trev Park
D Virgil Claus
D Alex Canady
D Mark Kennedy
M Wayne Owen
M Simon Weeder
M Ben Cleaves
M Jim Berger
F Pip Wallis
F Iain Williams

58th Minute

GK Wes Tray
D Trev Park
D Virgil Claus
D Alex Canady
D Mark Kennedy
M Simon Weeder
M Ben Cleaves
M Jim Berger
F Pip Wallis
F Iain Williams
F David Fraser

*Press Release*
The President is delighted to announced the team for the next match against Schiavonia.
After the success of the 4-3-3 in the match against Thergo, Iain Corder will keep this formation.


GK Wes Tray
D Trev Park
D Virgil Claus
D Alex Canady
D Mark Kennedy
M Simon Weeder
M Ben Cleaves
M Jim Berger
F Pip Wallis
F Iain Williams
F David Fraser


We are looking forward to playing Schiavonia and hope the match will be played in the spirit of fair play.

Other News
Wayne Owen after his intemperate outburst, has been fined 2 week wages

Second Place in Group Not Fluke, says Coach Moore

Apologetic Kittens 2-2 Legalese

A Two-Two draw with Legalese was seen as what could possibly be the only high-point of this Baptism of Fire for the Kittens. The small fowllowing from AP went wild when they took the lead just 3 minutes into the match after Iron Boot hit a screamer from the edge of the area following a dizzying run from Raul Chase. The match was clearly in the posession of the Kittens, and it remained that way throughout the first half.

Buty the second half saw a more spirited Legalese side and the score was soon One-Apiece. Monroe was the player who stepped up his game to deal with it and a marvellous run nearly ended in a dream finish. Unfortunately for Monroe it ended at the post but Gronko was there to make sure it hit the back of the net.

The Legalese team fought back again though a brilliant goal levelled the game just 4 minutes from the end.

Despite the result Apologetic Kittens showed the world that they could play football.

Apologetic Kittens 2 - 1 Havl

Finally a win for the Kittens, but it so nearly wasn't so.

Havl looked much the stronger side all through the first half, and their efforts paid off with a goal just past the half hour mark. Looking to increase their lead they pressed still further, but were unable to double their lead.

We may never know what was said in the dressing room, but the second hald began with a team that played somewhat differently and, perhaps more importantly, somewhat better. Gronko found the net after just 5 minutes of the second half had elapsed, despite barely seeing the ball in the first half, sliding the ball into the bottom corner.

A scrappy shot from a corner somehow found the net and left Eldon Kiefer too surprised to celebrate. But it sealed the win and gave AP a real chance at the group.

< as the screaming guitars of "Welcome to the Jungle" start to fade...>

Gnome: welcome back... it's a HUGE day.. coming up this hour.. we're gonna hook up with pro golfer Mark Stemkowski, he's looking for some karma before the AnTir Open next week. He'll be live in studio...
<rattling papers>
Quick email.

Dear Gnomie - Firania is my bitch. signed Group 4.
<paper crumpling>
ok.. Enough. I get it... The NorVoos.. they blew up big.
freaking smacked Firania in the assssss.. four-nil. It was like.. soon as they blew the opening whistle... shot, score, repeat.

And enough of the Kendra.. errrr, Kendara is God emails. Dude gets two goals and suddenly you think he's the next Walter Pele. Let me spell it out for you... where was he in game one against the Islands? Where was he in Game 2 with GangSigns? He disappeared quicker than a paycheck on Friday.

That was good.. rack me.

Clones, listen.. for the last time... One game does not a legend make. Two goals does not put you in the Hall of Fame.

<paper rattling>
Dear Jim - Kendara Is God. signed Firan - <crumpling paper>

ok, enough emails... let's go the the phones...still looking for a huge call... first up.. Alan in St Vincent, on a car phone.. Alan, what is up?

ALAN: hey Gnomie, thanks for the vine.. Props to the Blue for making Firania surrender quicker than France. All you heard yesterday from the mullet wearing Firania fans was, Ali is gonna knock you out.. Edison is gonna light you up. So not true.. memo to Firania fan: get back in your meth lab, errrr trailer.. errr Firanian condo and watch the replay on your 12 inch black and white tv.. you got scored on like your drunk sister when the navy comes in after six months at sea. And the goalie, Lockhart? where was hell was he?? I mean he gave it up more than a 2 royale stripper at a batchelor party. That's all I got, Jim. Ummm, War NorVoos in the BoF... War ... aww screw it I'm out!

<DING DING DING>
GNOME: RACK HIM! good call. Nice job on hitting the eject button at the end when you started to flame...
You're right, Lockhart was a sieve. Four goals on 11 shots? Freaking choke job.

Ok, final game for the NorVoos is tomorrow... hooking up with Rezza. Need a huge win... big goal differential... need to come out with guns blazing.
<music coming back up and under>
We're gonna take a break.. I need smoke and a coldie. When we come back more of your phone calls... still need a huge call and huge email...
one more quick one:
<paper rattling>
Jim - we also surrendered to France... signed Firania.


[OOC: for non-north american residents... the REAL Jim Rome is an uniquely abrasive, yet very funny and entertaining radio sports talk host here in the US. The callers are even more so. I"m just trying to parody a little of both.
Memo to Firania: all meant with a lot of love and humour. peace.]

To celebrate the shock win over Tamara Burung, Wentland Poet Laureate Junkin Worde has composed a Victory Haiku for public consumption.

Eleven blue men
Combat on the football plain
Wentland's victory.

When announced by the King, microphones were reputed to have picked up a sub rosa comment of "for God's sake, we must get a new Poet Laureate", but WBC1 is refusing to release the master tapes.

Qutar Sports News Network

Due to technical difficulties the Baptism of Fire match against Fbrenia, could not be shown this morning, however the match will be broadcast before the live match against United Island Empires. If you don't want to know the score look away now


The Islands of Qutar 2 (1) - (0) 0 Fbrenia
C.Saunders, 44
Ali, 78


Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Islands of Qutar 6 2 0 1 6:3 3
2. Bazalonia 6 2 0 0 4:2 2
3. Fbrenia 3 1 0 1 1:2 -1
4. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 2 1:3 -2
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 2 0:2 -2

This leaves us top of the group on goal difference, but second place Bazalonia have a game in hand, so all will be decided in the final two games.

In a statement Paul Dove announced an unchanged team, and said he and the team looking forward to the final game.

The Schiavone Scribe
LOWE PRAISES DEFENDERS
Schiavonia 0-0 Hainan

Schiavonia went into their second Baptism of Fire game with an unchanged side from their opening victory, a single-goal victory against Language Teachers. However, despite continuing with their relatively attacking 4-3-3 formation, it seems to be the Schiavone defence that is coming up trumps so far.

Park and Marsden were the stars for Schiavonia, as they put a halt to their opponents 100% record. There were chances for both sides, but neither forward line seemed too interested in scoring.. Unless scoring involves putting the ball in the coffee stall behind the stand, then it might have been a thriller!

Anyway, Palacetonia next, and not one that our team should win. Palace have just one point from their opening two games, and will more than definately be out with a point (or three) to prove.

Ratings: Kershaw 8; O'Kane 8, Park 8, MARSDEN 9, Smith 8; Sanderson 6 (Porse [59 min] 5), Jones 8, Moore 7; Topp 5 (West [45 min] 6), Schiavone 6 (Kerry [69 min] 5), Tarmey 7.

Final Score:
Schiavonia 0
Hainan 0

Matchday 4

Presented by the Na~ovi National: All news about the VIPs, soccer and field hockey leagues! Everything else is just propaganda! and it isn't even good propaganda!

Majeristan 1 Wentland 0
New Historia 1 Amorah 0

Dagabom 0 Southern Universe 2
Dehny 2 Keyshona 1

Havl 0 North Fenris 0
Basicota 0 Apologetic Kittens 1

Firania 2 County Islands 1
Nezza 1 Northern Voobaha 1

The Ardenne 2 Cataduanes 0
Race City 0 East Lithuania 1

Schiavonia 1 Palacetonia 1
Language Teachers 0 Hainan 1

Fbrenia 0 Bazalonia 1
United Island Empires 0 The Islands of Qutar 5

Rolatia 1 Gruenberg 3
Hoolabaloola 1 Hurleyland 1


Region 1 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Tanah Burung 6 2 0 1 4:3 1
2. Majeristan 6 2 0 1 3:2 1
3. Amorah 6 2 0 2 5:5 0
4. Wentland 3 1 0 2 4:5 -1
5. New Historia 3 1 0 2 1:2 -1

Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Southern Universe 7 2 1 0 4:1 3
2. Dagabom 6 2 0 1 4:3 1
3. Dehny 4 1 1 1 3:3 0
The Kazoo Peoples 4 1 1 1 3:3 0
5. Keyshona 1 0 1 3 4:8 -4

Region 3 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Apologetic Kittens 8 2 2 0 5:3 2
2. Legalese 7 2 1 0 7:3 4
3. Havl 2 0 2 1 2:3 -1
4. North Fenris 2 0 2 1 0:3 -3
5. Basicota 1 0 1 2 2:4 -2

Region 4 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Northern Voobaha 7 2 1 1 9:5 4
2. Star Signs 6 2 0 1 6:2 4
3. Nezza 4 1 1 1 2:3 -1
4. County Islands 3 1 0 2 4:7 -3
5. Firania 3 1 0 2 2:6 -4

Region 5 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Beleminares 7 2 1 0 6:0 6
2. The Ardenne 6 2 0 1 5:2 3
3. East Lithuania 4 1 1 2 2:4 -2
4. Cataduanes 3 1 0 2 1:4 -3
5. Race City 3 1 0 2 1:5 -4

Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 10 3 1 0 7:2 5
2. Schiavonia 5 1 2 0 2:1 1
3. Thergo 4 1 1 1 2:4 -2
4. Palacetonia 2 0 2 1 4:5 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 3 0:3 -3

Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Islands of Qutar 9 3 0 1 11:3 8
2. Bazalonia 9 3 0 0 5:2 3
3. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 2 1:3 -2
Fbrenia 3 1 0 2 1:3 -2
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 3 0:7 -7

Region 8 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Gruenberg 9 3 0 0 8:2 6
2. Errinundera 6 2 0 1 3:3 0
3. Hoolabaloola 4 1 1 1 5:3 2
4. Hurleyland 2 0 2 2 3:6 -3
5. Rolatia 1 0 1 2 2:7 -5

After a six and a half hour team practice in which they "did a lot of running, and something called 'offensive practice,'" according to Midfielder Mark Perknowleski, coach Manni Aka held a press conference to declare their newest strategy:

"Well, only one strategy sticks out in my mind, if you could call it a strategy: To win."

And The Kazoo Peoples desperately need a win too. The following are the playoff scenarios, and as you can see, The Kazoo Peoples can only qualify with a win, and a Southern Universe draw or win over Dehny:

[[OOC: Assuming FIFA tiebreaker situations]]

MD5:
Dagabom vs The Kazoo Peoples
Dehny vs Southern Universe

Because of a complicated scenario, the following is posted before the other scenarios:

With a Dagabom-Kazoo Peoples draw AND a Dehny win AND:
i. With a Dehny-Southern Universe GD of 1, Dagabom and Southern Universe qualifies.
ii. With a Dehny-Southern Universe GD of 2, Southern Universe and Dehny qualifies.
iii. With a Dehny-Southern Universe GD of 3 or more, Dagabom and Dehny qualifies.

Southern Universe can qualify:
1. With a win or draw against Dehny.
2. With a loss to Dehny AND a Dagabom loss to the Kazoo Peoples.
3. With a loss to Dehny (GD less than or equal to 2) AND a Dagabom draw with The Kazoo Peoples.

Dagabom can qualify:
1. With a win over The Kazoo Peoples
2. With a draw with The Kazoo Peoples AND a Dehny draw or loss

Dehny can qualify:
1. With a win over Southern Universe AND a Dagabom loss.
2. With a win over Southern Universe (GD of 2 or more) AND a Dagabom draw or win.

The Kazoo Peoples can qualify:
1. With a win over Dagabom AND a Southern Universe win or tie over Dehny.

Keyshona can not qualify.

Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Southern Universe 7 2 1 0 4:1 3
2. Dagabom 6 2 0 1 4:3 1
3. Dehny 4 1 1 1 3:3 0
The Kazoo Peoples 4 1 1 1 3:3 0
5. Keyshona 1 0 1 3 4:8 -4

[[OOC: Can you change your formation midway through the tournament? If so,]] Coach Manni Aka declared:

"Another strategy we'd like to announce is the change of our fomation, from a 4-4-2 to a 3-5-2." He motioned to a diagram, which showed former and new positions of the team:

Former
F C. Johnson J. Lampshade


MF M. Perknowleski R. Johnson M. Sweeny K. Shafur


D Scovest Ja. Johnson D. Smirkley M. Munster


GK Jim Johnson

New Formation
F C. Johnson J. Lampshade


MF M. Perknowleski M. Hermville R. Johnson M. Sweeny K. Shafur


D Ja. Johnson D. Smirkley M. Munster


GK Jim Johnson

"As you can see, we took Scovest off, and replaced him with Midfielder Melvin Hermville. This may increase our scoring opportunities, but I honestly don't know... I just want a win oh so badly."

The Kazoo Peoples play what could be their final game in the Baptism of Fire tomorrow against Dagabom.

Welcome to BazSports Highlight Recap of the Baptism of Fire Cup. Your Official Broadcaster of the Baptism of Fire and World Cup soccer tournaments

I am Nathan Jacks, Once again the Bazalopes have shown their dominance of group 7 the match against Fbrenia . Once again ended in a 1-nil score line, this time , scored the goal. It was in the second half 20 minutes to go to full time.... Let's have a look at the video...

"It's 20 minutes to go, Nil all. And Colin Neil, number 35 is heading towards the Fbrenian goal... What's this? There seem to be too many players on the field. Fberenia has an extra defender on the field. Caine Hawdon the cheif coach Bazalopes has filed an official complaint and, yes, Colin Neil has been given a penalty. Colin goes to the penalty spot and lines up his run up for the penaly... There he goes, shoots and he SCORES. The Fbrenian goalkeeper did not know which way to go and in the end he just stood there waiting for the ball to go past. Bazalonia leads 1 to nil.... "

Unfortunaterly there was also another incident which resuted in the red carding of The Bandit while takling his own teammate. Andrew tackled his fellow defender Arthur Bindley, the details are still sketchy but it has been reported that Andrew reacted after Arthur had made a slur against the FFSA and it's ex-players calling them all "Bald-headed buffons" Arthur sustained serious injuries and will be out for the rest of the Baptism of Fire and we are not sure about whether he'll be able to make it to the World Cup but BFSA is currently refusing to name a replacement for him until they see just exactly how bad it is. This also may be due to the fact that we will in our last match in our group will be facing "United Island Empires" who have yet to score a goal.

This is what the coaching team had to say in the post-match press conference about their next match

*Caine Hawdon - Chief Coach of the Bazalalonian Bazalopes *
"UIE? They should be a non-entity. They have yet to score a single goal all tournament. They should be easy."

Currently Bazalonia is in Second place on the group 7 ladder, but that should change next match day as a victory against UIE is virtually assured and the 1st place team have a bye. No matter what happens now Bazalonia is guarenteed to move onto the knock-out round of the BoF. See you tommorrow,

This has been Nathan Jacks reporting fort BazSport's Highlight Recap. Thank you and good night.

Kazoo Peoples Wait For Tomorrow's Deciding Game

The following teams have qualified for the knockout stage of the Baptism of Fire. Congratulations!

Region 1: All five teams could still conceiveably qualify.

Region 2: All but Keyshona can still qualify.

Region 3: Apologetic Kittens and Legalese have qualified.

Region 4: All five teams could conceiveably qualify.

Region 5: All five teams could conceiveably qualify.

Region 6: Hainan has qualified. All but Language Teachers could conceiveably qualify in the second spot.

Region 7: The Islands of Qutar and Bazalonia have qualified.

Region 8: Gruenberg has qualified. Errinundera and Hoolabaloola can qualify in the second spot.

Falcons on the verge

Playing three straight one goal matches isn't good for a coach's heart. Especially if it's a septogenerian coach whose Talzecki teams lost far more matches than they won in their two World Cup history and whose Majeristani national team has yet to score more than one goal in any of the three matches they've played so far.

However, Avid Mashoda didn't look the part of a harried coach. The Falcons won two of their three matches by pinning things on a veteran back four and allowing the young midfield and forwards outrun their opponents, this time winning 1-0 over Westland heading into the final match of Baptism of Fire Cup group play.

"We've managed to play hard all three matches. Sometimes, the execution hasn't been there when we've wanted it to be," Mashoda said. "That's the mark of an inexperienced side and we're going through the expected growing pains. We'll be fine by the time we get into the World Cup."

The Falcons (2-0-1, six points) sit level with region favourites Tanah Burung on points and record, with the former World Cup mainstays ahead on goals scored. Both Tanah Burung (four goals scored, three conceded) and Majeristan (three goals scored, two conceded) have a plus-one goal differential heading into the final match of the first stage.

"We're not pleased that the team we're playing is not a newcomer to World Cup football," Mashoda said. "But we're going to have to go play the opponent we've been dealt. We have to play our best football, better than we've done before." Tanah Burung are coming off their bye, so they have been given extra time to prepare for the Falcons, a fact not lost on Mashoda.

"If I didn't know any better, I'd think the World Cup Committee has it in for us," he said. "In fact, I think there's something fishy going on here. We're going to have to go out there and spoil the party for Tanah Burung and those crooked World Cup organisers. I always knew Rejistanians were sneaky."

For the players' parts, the team isn't that concerned about where Tanah Burung stand on the world hierarchy. They're just trying to get through to the next round, which they can do with a win or a draw against Tanah Burung. But don't tell the players they only need a draw.

"Who cares," one player responded when asked if he knew that a draw could send his team through to the knockouts. "We'd rather bull our way into the next stage than slink through on a draw or a loss."

Followign the dreary 1-0 defeat to Majeristan, the pundits on "Football Friday" were totally confused as to the position. Derek Medford was probably not the best person to try to work out the ramifications for qualification - he once said that Ollis had scored 11 goals one season, exactly double the amount he'd scored the previous one - but everyone knew once he finished speaking that his bizarre scenario involving counting corners and tripartite penalty shoot-outs was probably wrong.

So the media turned to telly totty Nina Angwyn, famous for her "two from the top" display in lad/footy mag Balls that nearly got her fired from quiz show "Wordplay".

"Well," she cooed in her Western Wentland accent, "one thing is clear. Fail to beat New Historia and we are out."

"What if we win, Nina?" drooled Mr Medford, zigzag tie akimbo.

"Depends on how we win.

"Win by 1-0 and we are still out, regardless of what happens. We then finish with an identical record to Amorah. Six points, zero goal difference, five goals for. Which means we finish below them on the countback - having lost to them first time out."

"But Majeristan and Tanah Burung could be on six points as well."

"No, they are playing each other. One of them at least will be on more than six. So win 1-0 and the best we can do is 3rd in the group.

"Now, if we win by 2-1 or 3-2, we have the same points and goal difference as Amorah, but will have scored more goals. So we finish above them.

"And if we win by two clear goals we have a better goal difference than Amorah and finish above them."

"So win by two and we're through?"

"Not quite. If Majeristan and Tanah Burung play out a draw they're on seven points each. The last thing we want is a draw there and doubtless the WFA will be impressing the need for fair play on the Committee. Certainly the draw is unfortunate as both teams need do nothing to go through.

"However, if there is a winner in that match, of any score, the losing team's goal difference will be AT BEST zero. And if we win by two goals or more our goal difference will be AT LEAST plus one.

"So, win by two, and the other match is NOT a draw, and we're through."

Derek was looking lost by this point so VT cut to a caption. Unfortunately the caption was the wrong one. It was easily explained, the VT guys had a work-experience school leaver with them, he had been somewhat obsessed with the spread in Balls and had got a bit confused as to why Nina was on the show, but certainly the male audience received a much-needed uplift.

The Schiavone Scribe
SCHIAVONIA ESCAPE DEFEAT
Schiavonia 1-1 Palacetonia

Schiavonia remain unbeaten in their Baptism of Fire campaign, but only after a late rescue operation from Kenny Sanderson.

In what was a bit of a dull encounter for two sides playing 4-3-3, the game was only really notable for the number of errors the players made. Worst of all on this fromt was Schiavonia's CJ Moore, who struggled to control the simplest of balls, then when he occasionally did, he just gave it back to Palacetonia.

Palace weren't much better, with Davin Fraser the main culprit. Jim Berger and Ben Cleaves played numerous through balls, almost all of which went towards Fraser. That was if he'd bother making runs. He didn't.

It didn't take a genius to see that Parker had to be taken off, and Palacetonia coach Iain Corder duely did so, replacing him with the lively-looking Ed Parker. It was the spark that the game needed, and within a few minutes, Palacetonia were ahead, Parker latching onto a Berger through ball and slipping the ball under a helpless Ben Kershaw.

Schiavonia had to do something quick, and so brought on the more creative Horatio Besenares for Moore and Gary Topp for Harry West.

Eventually, when Schiavonia did string a few decent passes together, the move was only halted by Trev Park bringing down Topp for a free kick 25 yards from goal. Up stepped Sanderson, who duly curled the shot into the top corner, and let Schiavonia in for a lucky point.

The result leaves Schiavonia in second place in Group 6, and needing only a draw from their last fixture against Thergo to go through. While it might seem quite an easy game on paper compared to the last two, if you read on, then Michael Ford's outburst will change your mind about the game.

Rodney Lowe was happy after the game. "A draw! And we were hopeless! If we can keep getting results like this, maybe we could go a long way in this competition."

Ratings: Kershaw 6; O'Kane 7, O. Park 7, Marsden 7, Smith 6; SANDERSON 8, Jones 6, Moore 4 (Besenares [62 min] 6); West 5 (Topp [62 min] 7), Tarmey 7, McAndrew 6 (Schiavone [75 min] 6).
Palacetonia: Tray 6; T. Park 6, Claus 7, Canaday 6, Kennedy 7; Weeder 6 (Giles [85 min] 5), Cleaves 7, Berger 8; Wallis 6, Williams 6, Fraser 5 (Parker [53 min] 8).

Final Score:
Schiavonia 1 (Sanderson 87)
Palacetonia 1 (Parker 55)




FORD BLASTS HOSTS

SFF Chief Michael Ford has hit out at the RejisFA in relation to the size of a secret thing Ford will only refer to as "RP bonus" at the Baptism of Fire.

Ford fumed, "It quite clearly isn't big enough! There have been some outrageous results in this tournament, though thankfully none involving Schiavonia as yet."

Ford put forward a number of examples in the tables to further his case. "I'll start with Group 1. How the devil are Tanah Burung top of the table? They haven't played in a World Cup for years, yet they're still winning at a canter. Group 2, there's only The Kazoo Peoples who've tried, and where are they? Fourth!"

"Then there's Rolatia and Palacetonia, who have just three points between them, poor things."

But, for some unexplained reason, there was one nation that seemed to particularly nark off Ford, and for no apparent readon, either.

"Beleminares! How the hell are they doing so well? I actually went to watch them train, and they were so funny! How are they ahead of both East Lithuania and Cataduanes? Crazy..."

The outburst also acted as a warning for the Schiavonia team in their match against Thrego. "We can take nothing for granted in this cup. We must fight for the draw that we need, and then hope for an easy draw. Like Beleminares."

OOC: This opinion is only that of Michael Ford. Really, we have nothing against our hosts, and thank them for taking the time to run the competition. Ford is just a stirrer of trouble, but the Schiavone people do not realise this yet.

East Lithuania Wins!!! 1-0 Victory Raises Spirits for World Cup 26


At 90+ minutes, a penelty shot by Crystal finally went in to win the game 1-0 against Race City. A hard fought game by both teams ended with East Lithuania finally wining a game. It is the last game, as next week is a bye week, and with what seems like no way to quilify for the next round, East Lithuania is ready to pack up and leave for World Cup 26.

"I'm so happy for this team." Couch Discolo said in a press conferance afterwards. "They put on a great fight, and I think they're ready for the World Cup.

ISLANDERS LOOK TO REGROUP

The loss of the 'Seleccion' to The Ardenne has certainly dampened the islanders initial optimism however Jose (Manua, national coach) has issued a crisis meeting to discuss the sithuation. The squad also have loss the services of Alomar who suffered a back injury during the 2-0 defeat to the Ardenne, his place has been taken by Souletano in the central midfield alongside Chavicano. The failure of Macalinao to perform has led to his dropping to the bench in favour of Bata who looks set to play targetman alongside the pacy trickster Guarin. Cataduanes fans will be hoping for victory in the next fixture to restore hope to the inexperienced side prior to the world cup.

One of the more popular programmes in Wentland proved to be "Call Edgar Bluff" - a fly-on-the-wall documentary following the national team manager during the Baptism Of Fire tournament. A key episode proved to be the final tactical session before the make-or-break game with New Historia.

With a two-goal victory almost the absolute minimum required, Bluff decided he needed some tactical surgery and prepared a different tactical approach. The cameras picked him up as he explained things to the team.

"New Historia are a very defence-minded team, like Majeristan. We need to prepare better for such teams, we cannot break them down so easily.

"Therefore I'm switching the formation to a 3-4-2-1, known as the Potted Christmas Tree.

"I'm not so worried about the back. I think we can cope with what New Historia has to offer. But I want to keep my options open.

"Jack, you're going to stay in goal. But we need to have three centre-halves so I'm going with Grosvenor, Jenkins and Jones. Gus, you'll block things in the middle. Knock 'em down for Benny or Bill to clear.

"The middle's gonna be the same as normal. Jamesy and Devey either side of Joe and Harry. Need some continuity.

"Up front, Frannie, I know you're knackered after playing all 3 games so far. I'm giving you a rest. [Frannie looks devastated.] You're coming on with half-an-hour to go, if necessary, hopefully their defence will not be able to cope with your speed when they're tired.

"Billy, you're at the apex. Centre-forward. But we're having two playing off you. Knock it to your left and Thwacker Thwaites will have it. [Ian Thwaites struggles to hide an exultant grin, he was very much fourth choice for the team.] To the right and Smudger will have it.

"It's no reflection on you, twins, that you're on the bench for the final game. You may well need to come on late on. Plus you're there for back-up."

The team went on to work on various drills. However the shot that everyone remembered was the lingering look on Frank Treves' face - tearful, yet defiant. The schoolboy had done nothing wrong in the tournament yet was missing Wentland's most important match for years, perhaps ever...

Early Strike Ensures Qualification For Kittens

A headed shot by Iron Boot after just 12 minutes of play was enough to put AP into the next round. The match was a dreary affair, with the Kittens switching to a 5-4-1 formation at half time.

However winning the group is far from assured as Legalese must lose their final group game for the position to arise.

But for now all worries can be ignored, as Rejistania is about to be hit with more impressive football when the Kittens face the top teams from other groups in a few days.

(OOC: I agree Schiavonia. I've churned out close to five pages of RP and for what - 1 draw and 2 losses! We only get one BoF you know!)
The Rolatian Telegraph
The number one Rolatian broadsheet since 1864

Gatri: "I'm pissed off"
The manager Johnathan Gatri has today launched a stratling attack on the Rolatian squad after the team only picked up one point in three games to leave them bottom of their group and mathmetically out of BoF 26.

The manager, in an interview with our sports correspondant today, stated "The Rolatian team has done absolutely crap. I've been training hard with the lads, and on paper we're far superior to our opponents, but we've scored TWO GOALS and conceded seven. Our defence is the problem - they're leaving too much down to Ramar and for all his abilities, he can't save them all. The team will be facing major changes in time for WC26 qualifying. Frankly, I'm pissed off at the performances."

In other news, there have been some minor riots by Rolatian fans. Two Rolatians are currently under arrest after a drunken brawl with three Errinunderans. The RFA have stated that they are 'angered' by the actions and do not support them.

Daily Herald

Iain Corder remained upbeat so far despite a desperately unlucky loss. An inspired substitution lead to Palacetonia's first goal scored by Ed Parker. He replaced David Fraser, who in his first competitive start for Palacetonia was not really up to it.

The importance of a win became more and more apparent as results elsewhere did not go Palacetonia's way, not helped by some yet more farcical defending. Trev Park, caught out of position, hacked down Topp of Schiavonia around 25 yards out, from which, the goal was scored. Sanderson being considered a dead-ball specialist.

A increasingly desperate Iain Corder threw on Xander Giles in place of Simon Weeder. One of the youngest in the squad, Weeder is regarded as a long term possibility for a permanent spot in the first eleven. There were signs here but overall, not enough time to make an impression. One powerful shot that landed in row Z was about the extent of his contribution.

Pip Wallis was not her usual self. Failing to link up effectively with either Fraser or Iain Williams, chance after chance were wasted, if only two six yard tap-ins were taken, then it might have been a different story altogether.

The post match conference was interesting. Once again, the Palacetonia FA staff walked out after an inocous remark about the mathematics of qualifying was asked. The person sitting next to the reporter for one of the broadsheets is a lipreader and clearly made out that they muttered something about unhelpful reportage.

From the Palacetonia FA

Here is the updated table:


Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 10 3 1 0 7:2 5
2. Schiavonia 5 1 2 0 2:1 1
3. Thergo 4 1 1 1 2:4 -2
4. Palacetonia 2 0 2 1 4:5 -1
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 3 0:3 -3


Obviously if results were to go our way, we would go through on results against the other teams

The team for the crunch match against Language Teachers is as follows:

1 Tray
3 Park
4 Claus
2 Arty
16 Kennedy
19 Giles
11 Cleaves
22 Berger
8 J. Camry
9 Wallis
10 Williams


We all hope that the maximum three points will be gained here for our first competitive win in all competitions.

THE TIMES

Doubt was raised last night about the sanity of the PFA staff. Their press release was overly optimistic. Don't forget that Palacetonia football team have done far better than expected in the tournament to date, which is in no doubt to the skills of Iain Corder rather than the diplomacy of the PFA. Their walkouts of the Press Conferences is approaching farce and at this present rate, they must face harder questions.
Don't get us wrong, our most famous footballer had inspired moments with his substitutions and although his bouncebackability phrase has hit the dictionary, he will need a miracle of no small magnitude to go through to the next round. We wish him all the luck!

***RTEST release***for worldwide publication***

BAPTISM OF FIRE COOLED

An impending ticket allocation crisis has been averted by the remarkable circumstances in Group 1, where any one of the teams can qualify in the final round of matches.

The Wentland allocation of tickets for their match with New Historia sold out in record time but disappointed Wents have snapped up spare tickets for Majeristan versus Tanah Burung.

Wentland can only qualify if there is a positive result in that game with the Blues winning themselves. "We're not supporting either team," said Manda Reining, 18, on a gap year in Rejistan. "We just want someone to win. We'll support whoever scores!"

Each of the teams' coaches will have spies at the other game to see what is necessary. But the increase in Wentland spectators at the Majeristan-Burung clash could lead to trouble. "If they aren't trying, we might have something to say about it," said 'Mez', self-proclaimed member of "The Establishment", the hooligan firm that associates with Wentland outfit Chadwick City. "The last thing we want is to be stitched up."

The Rejistan police force have been monitoring the situation but it appears little can be done. Ticketing restrictions only apply to the teams concerned.

However the Wentland fans do not seem overly bothered about the situation. "We're just pleased to have seen them win," said Supporters' Club representative Emilia Edwards. "And if we do go out at least those at the other game will see two of the best sixteen teams in the Baptism."

And any advice for Wentland? "Only three words," she said. "Attack, attack and attack!"

***end/txmsn***

The article was picked up in the Wentland Times ("We'll Support Who Evermore"), the Wentland Telegraph ("Come On Whoever"), the Wentland Sun ("Punch Your Ticket"), the Wentland Independent ("Ticket Allocation Fiasco Averted") and the Wentland Bigot ("If You Cheat Us We Will Invade Tomorrow"). International Press did not.

< as you flip through the satellite channels.. you come across a mildly amusing commercial.. as it end you hear the familiar five note opening jingle with an announcer's voice under.>

ANCR: NVNN presents.. the Baptism of Fire post-match report. Brought to you by "Llama Airlines, now crash-free since Monday."
Now, your hosts, Stuart Snottand Keith Oldermann...

<the lights soften from the NVNN trademark bright blue to show two men sitting at the desk.. Stuart, looking hip and dapper in his lemon-yellow suit with red tie and Keith, with ovesized circle-rim glasses and greying hair.>

KEITH: The Norvoos now only can sit and hope for the best in the BoF Group Round.

STUART: Might as well make them buy tckets because they are now simply specatators for tomorrow's fifth and final game. But what put them in the position of needing some help? I mean they looked sooo good.

KEITH: The Blue needed a win, and a BIG win over Nezza to secure a spot in the round of 16... and they got anything but.
<video highlights begin>

KEITH: Kendara, coming off his two goal match against Firania - looking a little tired.

STUART: tired like Santa at 5 am on Christmas.

KEITH: 37th minute.. Nezza on the run.. the long cross field pass.. Peterson can get there.. but Melby... is lurking... <starts humming theme from "Jaws">

STUART: you know what that means... forget the sliding tackle.. Slam Master Mel with the 2 point take down... and the referee from Someguynamedstan puts him in Da Book of Bad People.

Scoreless first half... bump this mother ahead to the 52nd minute.
Nezza moving and grooving... chip ahead over the defnsee.. ya know the footrace ain't the Voos' thing.. you can score that one.. the Nez dropping the opening bomb 1-0 bad guys.

KEITH: but like a bad burrito from TacoVoo, the Blues come back up...
14 minutes later... Kendara.. short flick for Melby, but leaves it for Moeschler... GOALLLLLLL!

STUART: Can I get an amen from the congregation?

KEITH: Amen brother Stu... but is there one more prayer... 86th minute... itd be the last rush for the Blue... Vrab.. the chip up..looking for Kendara.. but the Nezz goalie gets to it first.. rest of the game was slower than a Celine Dion album... the final group game ends in a 1-1 draw
< back on camera>

So it sets up a interesting sitaution... last thing the NorVoos want to see tomorrow is a Nezza win AND a Star Signs win... that would but the Blue on the outside looking in..

STUART: why you think I'm dressed in County Island colours, dawg?
But unless both of those things happen.. Northern Voobaha will advance to the second round. And on that note, ain't nothing left to say. For Keith, I'm Stu, we'll do this again tomorrow night. Peace.

KEITH: Amen brother Stuart, amen..

<the lights fade back to blue as the music ends>

Qutar Sports News Network

Good Morning Qutar, and its the fourth and final game in this round for Qutar, a win today against United Island Empires would secure a place in the next round, the fans are expecting with two wins on the trot so far. Oh it looks like the teams are coming onto the pitch now, lining up for the anthems, and we're ready for the kick off, oh you should hear the sound here, it's deafening.

Ali kicks off the match, and they're making moves foward already, Thomas gets it to Parker on the right, he's making a move down the right wing, he gets past the number 4, he gets the cross in, it's met by the head of Ali, oh and its in!! What a great start to the match, one minute in and already 1-0! Oh this is wonderful!

United Island Empires start off the match again, but it seems only half heartedly with Thomas taking possesion of the ball almost straight away, he's making strides down the field and he's got Ali in support, he goes past one defender, passes the ball to Ali, oh he's been fouled, but the referee says no, no foul, and the number 5 is making a move up the pitch, passing to his number 10, who takes a shot from outside the box, easy save for Stone there, who rolls the ball straight back out, and Lemkes picks it up and makes a move down the pitch, getting down to Tomlin, and he's pacing it down the left wing, gets a cross in meets the head of Thomas, oh its hit the post! But it goes back out to Gordon, who moves in for the shot, oh he's been fouled for sure, if he doesn't get carded the fans will mob the pitch, and a yellow card comes out for the number 3, a free kick just outside the box, I think its going to be Gordon to take the kick, but Chris Saunders is up there aswell, its Saunders running up, he goes over the ball and Gordon fires a beautiful free kick, oh its in!! Wonderfully curled over the wall and into the top right hand corner, now you won't see a much better free kick than that.

Its about twenty-five minutes into the match and Qutar are in a strong position leading 2-0 and United Island Empires not showing much resistance, it looks like Qutar have qualified and its only 25 minutes into the game. Well United Island Empires kick off again, and their captain really seems to be cheering them on, trying to get things going, but they don't seem to be enthused, as a pass is cut out by Gordan who quickly passes the ball to Ali, who is slicing throught the midfield, he's supported by Thomas, oh he's through the defence the keeper is coming out, oh great pass to Thomas who easly slots it home to make it 3-0!! This is Qutar biggest number of scored goals so far, and the crowd want more! And so does this commentator.

We have about five minutes left of normal play in this half, and United Island Empires have re-grouped slightly but it hasn't lasted as Gordon breaks through again, he's got Ali to the left and Thomas to the right, he draws the defender and passes to Thomas, who shoots he beats the keeper but not the post! Oh the posts around here don't like Thomas one bit. The referee blows his whistle for half time, and i'm checking my watch and I think he's blown it a couple a minutes too early, but what the hey its 3-0 at half time. And the United Island Empires manager is going to have to work a miracle over half time.

Its time for the second half and in wonder what the game plan is for United Island Empires, well we'll find out as they kick off the second, they seem more determined, but they've lost possesion again, what the number 8 has just blatently fouled Gordon, must be a yellow card, yes the referee got that one right. Gordon will start off play again, he spots a run made by Thomas, who latches onto the ball, sees Ali and plasses the ball to him, and Ali sends it into the top corner!! What a goal from 25 yards out, that his second goal of the match and Qutar's fourth. Surely the game is now out of reach for United Island Empires.

United Island Empires kick off again, and manage to hold onto the ball, now their number 8 is in possesion of the ball, tries to pass to his striker, but Lemkes cuts him out and sends the ball back the other way to Gordon, who's been hacked down again!! This time it's the number 9 player, he looks like he's in pain, I think its his leg that he's holding, as the referee give the yellow the stretcher is being sent on, oh you can see the lad is in real pain, Paul Dove is warming up Smith just in case. Yes there going to have to sub on Smith, it looks like they're taking Gordon out of the staduim, he might have been injured quite bad. Smith is coming on the pitch now, and he's got half an hour on the pitch left to play. Is Chris Saunders to take the kick, and Qutar are playing a bit more cautiously as United Island Empires seem to be deliberately going into the tackles very hard. It seems that a deadlock has been formed with three more yellow cards being handed out for late tackles, and your can see the Qutari players getting very frustrated with ten minutes left to play, and its Stone to take the goal kick, he gets it up to Smith, he sees Parker making a run down the wing, gets the ball to him, he jumps out of the way of a late tackle, the defenders are closing in, he gets the cross in met by the head of Ali, only to be punched out by the keeper, but only so far as Tomlin, who get the ball in, oh what a volley by Ali to complete a hat-trick, the first ever Qutari international hat-trick, and what a way to do it! 5-0! What a game, and the referee blows his whistle for the end of the game. Bring on the next round!!


The Islands of Qutar 5 (3) - (0) 0 United Island Empires
Ali, 1, 48, 90
C.Saunders, 24
Thomas, 43

Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Islands of Qutar 9 3 0 1 11:3 8
2. Bazalonia 9 3 0 0 5:2 3
3. Pyrologists911 3 1 0 2 1:3 -2
4. Fbrenia 3 1 0 2 1:3 -2
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 3 0:7 -7

The Rejistan police force have been monitoring the situation but it appears little can be done. Ticketing restrictions only apply to the teams concerned.


The nation is called is Rejistania. It comes from Rejis meaning united and tani meaning land. The adjective is rejistanian or rejistani.

(OOC: I agree Schiavonia. I've churned out close to five pages of RP and for what - 1 draw and 2 losses! We only get one BoF you know!)


Roleplaying does not guarantee wins... if/when you are eliminated, I can show you details about the RP-bonus. IMHO it suffices, but apparently the formula isn't willing to cooperate with it...

Matchday 5

Presented by: Hanasuma Sportswear - We make winning beautiful!


Majeristan 4 Tanah Burung 0
Wentland 1 New Historia 0
Region 1 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Majeristan 9 3 0 1 7:2 5

2. Amorah 6 2 0 2 5:5 0
Wentland 6 2 0 2 5:5 0

4. Tanah Burung 6 2 0 2 4:7 -3
5. New Historia 3 1 0 3 1:3 -2
Amorah advances on head-to-head result


Dagabom 0 The Kazoo Peoples 4
Southern Universe 2 Dehny 0
Region 2 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Southern Universe 10 3 1 0 6:1 5
2. The Kazoo Peoples 7 2 1 1 7:3 4
3. Dagabom 6 2 0 2 4:7 -3
4. Dehny 4 1 1 2 3:5 -2
5. Keyshona 1 0 1 3 4:8 -4

Havl 0 Legalese 3
North Fenris 1 Basicota 0
Region 3 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Legalese 10 3 1 0 10:3 7
2. Apologetic Kittens 8 2 2 0 5:3 2
3. North Fenris 5 1 2 1 1:3 -2
4. Havl 2 0 2 2 2:6 -4
5. Basicota 1 0 1 3 2:5 -3

Firania 2 Star Signs 1
County Islands 1 Nezza 1
Region 4 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Northern Voobaha 7 2 1 1 9:5 4
2. Star Signs 6 2 0 2 7:4 3
3. Firania 6 2 0 2 4:7 -3
4. Nezza 5 1 2 1 3:4 -1
5. County Islands 4 1 1 2 5:8 -3

The Ardenne 1 Beleminares 1
Cataduanes 0 Race City 0
Region 5 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. The Ardenne 7 2 1 1 6:3 3
2. East Lithuania 4 1 1 2 2:4 -2
3. Cataduanes 4 1 1 2 1:4 -3
4. Race City 4 1 1 2 1:5 -4
5. Beleminares 0 2 2 0 7:1 6
Beleminares ceased to exist and therefore loses its qualification spot

Schiavonia 0 Thergo 0
Palacetonia 1 Language Teachers 0
Region 6 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Hainan 10 3 1 0 7:2 5
2. Schiavonia 6 1 3 0 2:1 1
3. Palacetonia 5 1 2 1 5:5 0
4. Thergo 5 1 2 1 2:4 -2
5. Language Teachers 0 0 0 4 0:4 -4

Fbrenia 0 Pyrologists911 0
Bazalonia 2 United Island Empires 0
Region 7 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Bazalonia 12 4 0 0 7:2 5
2. The Islands of Qutar 9 3 0 1 11:3 8
3. Pyrologists911 4 1 1 2 1:3 -2
Fbrenia 4 1 1 2 1:3 -2
5. United Island Empires 0 0 0 4 0:9 -9

Rolatia 2 Errinundera 0
Gruenberg 2 Hoolabaloola 0
Region 8 Pts W D L GF:GA GD
1. Gruenberg 12 4 0 0 10:2 8
2. Errinundera 6 2 0 2 3:5 -2
3. Hoolabaloola 4 1 1 2 5:5 0
4. Rolatia 4 1 1 2 4:7 -3
5. Hurleyland 2 0 2 2 3:6 -3

OOC: Yes, I really wished all RPers would have qualified, yes, I think it is bad how Beleminares dominated its group. But on the other hand, I as host ave an integrity and it means that generated results stand even if test sims had 'better' results.

Group 1
Majeristan, Amorah advance.

Group 2
Southern Universe, Kazoo Peoples advance.

Group 3
Legalese, Apologetic Kittens advance.

Group 4
Northern Voobah, Star Signs advance.

Group 5

The Ardenne, East Lithuania advance.

Group 6
Hainan, Schiavonia advances.

Group 7
Bazalonia and The Islands of Qutar advance.

Group 8
Gruenberg and Errinundera advance.

OOC:


[[OOC: Using FIFA tiebreaks:]]


Anyone in their right mind knows that FIFA are idiots. Traditional methods (GD, GF, then Head-to-head) are used here, so say the rules (to which a link would magically appear here if it weren't 3am and I didn't need the sleep.)

EDIT: Here they are. (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/World_Cup_Committee)

After the match with the United Island Empire the Coaching team of the Bazalonian Bazalopes did not attend the after match press conference but instead released the following statement.

"We, the coaching team of the Bazalonian Bazalopes are proud of all our members. However the score line in this our last match did not truely represent our dominance against the United Island Empire. We are very disappointed with the umpiring as we believe that there where at least 2 goals that should have been declared as valid. The goals we refer to was in the 15th minute, by Peter Hobble and in the 25th minute of the second half by Lucas Reaver.

Umpiring issues behind, we have still shown our diminance by not only not losing any of our matches but by winning all of them. We'd particularily like congratulate Peter Hobble and James Kantwell, who scored the only goals for the match in the 30th minute and in the 35th minute.

Nothing against United Island Empire but really we should have trounced them with a scoreline like the Island of Qutar's scoreline against them 0-5, particularily since we scored 3 goals against Qutar in our opening match. We are one top of our group, with a perfect 12 points winnng all 4 of our matches.

On a side note, We are now ready to announce Arthur Bindley's replacement Fjord Perts who was from the old FFSA league."

Falcons soar into knockouts

So much for a competitive disadvantage.

Hours before the Majeristani football association were able to deliver a formal complaint about World Cup veterans Tanah Burung being their opponent in a do-or-die Baptism of Fire Cup qualifying match, the Falcons rendered that protest moot in style. Forward Hakan el Dajani scored twice and assisted on two other goals and Majeristan routed Tanah Burung 4-0.

"We're glad we were able to put together an outstanding football game," Coach Avid Mashoda said. "That was really a complete effort in all phases of the game. We played like we were the experienced World Cup vets."

Indeed, Tanah Burung played the second half looking like they didn't know what hit them. A Majeristan side that only scored three goals in its three previous matches and hadn't scored even two goals in a match scored three goals before a half hour had expired. The Falcons defence, a unit the team has leaned heavily on throughout the tournament, was stifling, limiting Tanah Burung to three shots, including one on goalkeeper Khari Hasenjafi.

"The back four made it easy for me," Hasenjafi said. "The team played great up front and just made me a bystander." The result also allowed Mashoda to do something he hadn't been able to do all tournament: By the 82nd minute of the match, Mashoda finally sat down.

"As a coach, you never tell yourself or your team that the game's over until the referees blow the final whistle," Mashoda said. "But the way we played, that game was pretty well in hand."

Tanah Burung couldn't argue. After all, Majeristan dominated nearly every statistic, from time of possession (61 minutes to 29), shots (19 to three), shots on goal (seven to one), corner kicks (12 to two), and ran their short pass-oriented offence to near perfection.

"That's the game that's going to do a world for this group," Hasenjafi said. "Our confidence is going to be sky high."

Apparently, practice makes perfect. After a grueling six-and-a-half hour practicce yesterday, the Kazoo Peoples blow out opposing Dagabom 4-0.

Manni Aka, was obviously pleased with the result: "I'm real proud of our boys," he said under a thick mist of champagne. "I told [the press] what would happen, and we came back and did it. We won! We did it the most honorable, and the only way possible: with a win."

"The change of formation obviously helped," said self-proclaimed MVP Mervin Hermville, who had two assists, and five shots on the goal. "I really brought something to the team, and I hope I stay in for the knockout round matches."

"And welcome to the first broadcast of the Kazoo Sports Network. We apologize for coming onto the Baptism of Fire scene so late, but a labor strike among..., er... janitors kept us behind schedule. I'm Bob Janny, and with me is co-host Rob Bedinger. Rob, how strong is this Dagabom team when compared to the Kazoo Peoples?"

Rob: "This team is the best national football I've EVER seen. Ever. In all the world."

Bob: "We'd like to take this moment to remind you that all broadcasters of the Kazoo Sports Network are paid by the Kazoo Soccer Association. The Kazoo Soccer Association -- our team is good. Real good. FEAR THE KAZOO!"

Rob: "And the match begins. The Kazoo Peoples get the ball first. Rudy Johnson to Smirkley to Sweeny, who does some fancy footwork to get away from the Dagabom defender, SWEENY, near the goal, sh- no, he saw the defender, gets rid of it to Hermville, who shoots! AWWWW, off the post. Recovered by Chadd Johnson, who shoots... GOOOOAL! Assist to Hermville, though all he did really was kick it off the post..."

Bob: "A goal at the 8 minute mark puts the Kazoos ahead, 1-nil. We'll take our first commercial break."

~A flurry of approximately 15 minutes of ads cross the screen: credit cards, beer, cars, a Nikadide sporting apparel ad, more cars, more beer, ads for upcoming events (ooh! a monster truck rally this Sunday!), etc.~

Bob: "And we're back. Gotta keep those sponsors paying us, *achem*, sponsors happy. Real happy."

Rob: "While on break, you missed two spectacular plays, both scoring, both in the Kazoo Peoples favor. A bicycle kick from Lampshade clears the keeper at the 13 minute mark, giving them a goal (unassisted), Kazoos up 2-zip...

*CROWD ERUPTS IN LOUD CHEERS; Rob continues commentary of what you missed during commercial, as if nothing has happened...*

Rob: ...Hermville to Rudy Johnson back to Hermville, Hermville to Lampshade, Lamshade SHOOTS... SCORES! 3-oh, Kazoos. Assist to Hermville."

Bob: "And what you just missed was an absolute blunder by Dagabom's team. DDown by three, and a Dagabom defender is apparently furious, kicking the ball not out of the general vicinity, but instead into his own goal! An own goal on a Dagabom defender. Embarrassing. What do you think could have caused this, Rob?"

Rob: ".......um... faulty cheese products?"

Bob: "I don't think so. And -- *pauses, pressing earpiece further into ear; camera pans and zooms on his face* I have just received word that we have been cancelled. Apparently, the local, publicly-owned station and telecasters are much better. That was fun while it lasted, huh, Rob?"

*Camera zooms out once more, pans out to see the two of them -- except the chair where Rob sat is vacant. The camera quickly turns around to see an open door.*

Bob: "Um, that was... exciting. Hope you, um, stay tuned for more soccer action?"

*A testing pattern appears on the screen, with words superimposed, "Please standby."*

Leaderboard:
Goals:
3 Chadd Johnson
3 Jonny Lampshade

Assists:
2 Melvin Hermville
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Chadd Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists+Goals:
4 Chadd Johnson
3 Jonny Lampshade
2 Melvin Hermville
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Local crazy man Donald McRonald awaits draw for knockout round: "Sure, everyone is excited! Can't wait to see who we play..."

Coach Manni Aka plans to retain the strategy used in today's game for knockout rounds, except when announced otherwise.

The Rolatian Telegraph
The number one broadsheet since 1864

Rolatia FINALLY win a game
Rolatia have finally won a game to finish 4th in their group - ironically, their win was against second-placed Errinundera. The two goals were the results of two magnificent strikes from striker Tedd Verres, leading to at least Rolatia going out on a high note. Jonathan Gatri, Rolatian manager, stated "We've been so fucking unliucky this tournament it's not funny. At least we've managed to get our first international win, and Verres has picked up a pretty nice set of goals. We have to prepare for qualifying."

Meanwhile, there have been moderate riots in Northern Ranaria with one dead and sixteen injured after a huge brawl outside a pub. This is unsurprising, as Northern Ranaria is a notorious s***hole where several notable people have been assassinated, including Fascist leader and key third-party MP Alan Relith in 1984.

Islanders finish 3rd

Cataduanes have finished third after drawing 0-0 with Race City, despite the enterprising style of the islanders the loss of Alomar's creativity in midfield limited there attack, Guarin came close in the 63 rd minute beating two opposition defenders during a 20 yard run before pile driving ball far and wide of the goal. otherwise the football was slow and chances few. The islanders return to Oltaloro tomorrow to begin training for the world cup.

The Schiavone Scribe
SCHIAVONIA QUALIFY!
Schiavonia 0-0 Thrego

Schiavonia have continued their unbeaten run in the Baptism of Fire tournament with another draw, 0-0 against Thrego.

The result was enough to see Schiavnoia advance into the knockout phases of the tournament, but it is now the second goalless encounter that Schiavonia have been involved in here in Rejistania, something that is quite un-Schiavone. If we didn't know better, we might even suggest that there was something more to it. But fortunately, we do.

It was as if the strikers didn't want to score. Shots went in, but all seemed to miss by miles and miles. It wasn't a pretty game either, with lots of scrappy tackles going in all over the pitch.

All in all, not much worth writing home about, and as we haven't received information about who Schiavonia will face in the next stage, we can't talk about that, either.

Manager Rodney Lowe had nothing to say at the end of the game, as he had fallen asleep.

Ratings: Kershaw 6; O'Kane 7, PARK 8, Marsden 7, Smith 7; Sanderson 6, Jones 7, Weir 6; Topp 4 (West [55 min] 4), Tarmey 6 (Kerry [67 min] 5), McAndrew 5 (Schiavone [47 min] 6).


Final Score:
Schiavonia 0
Thrego 0

The Times

Disappointment struck Palacetonia as results elsewhere did not go their way despite a excellent 1-0 win.

Xander Giles made his first start in the tournament and belying his age worked impressively with the front line of Pip Wallis and Iain Williams to create numerous chances. It was only due to the diligence and skill of the opposing goalkeeper that not more were scored.

In the 31st minute, Pip Wallis sprang a poorly executed offside trap for a feeder ball. Giles picked it up and calmly rounded the keeper before slotting it right home into the bottom right corner.

As more and more chances went begging throughout the rest of the the 1st half and 2nd half, the frustration started to show and Pip Wallis picked up her second yellow of the tournament which, if Palacetonia had qualified, would have ruled her out of the next match. There were also yellows for Trev Park for stamping and Jim Berger could count himself lucky not to have been sent off for a tackle from behind.

With Language Teachers rarely threatening and continued news from the Schiavonia match meant Palacetonia could not qualify, Iain Corder decided to experiment a little and tested out three of his players who had not played yet in the tournament. Corrie Mears came on for Clive Arty in the 53rd minute and was a little forlorn out on the left wing. The Language Teacher's right winger rarely received the ball and as such, Mears' role was restricted to checking out the . Philip News who came on for Ben Cleaves showed doubt in front of the goal and Matt Theat, a 74th minute replacement for Mark Kennedy was competent as he slotted into his allotted role.

As rumours spread about Schiavonia's bore draw, there was a definate flag in the body language of the coach which communicated themselves out into the field.

The referee wisely called time up after 2 minutes of injury time with 3 minutes to play as Schiavonia had already finished their match and qualified.

After the match, the general consensus amongst the fans was that it was a credible first performance but if only Sanderson had not been a free kick specialist for Schiavonia...

*ooc* as i have been knocked out, please may I have my RP bonus and KP ranking thanks. Ooops, i didnt sign up for wc26... better wait for 27 cos this is fun!!!!

*ooc* as i have been knocked out, please may I have my RP bonus and KP ranking thanks. Ooops, i didnt sign up for wc26... better wait for 27 cos this is fun!!!![OOC: IIRC, the KPB rankings don't get generated until after the Baptism of Fire Cup so they can be used for the World Cup draw.]

Falcons await word of opponents

Coach Avid Mashoda took a swig from his ever-present bottle of purified water and gazed at the training facility with a serene look on his age-creased face. Mashoda's lifetime record as a national team coach is hardly anything to write home about, but Mashoda's reputation as an architect belies his record of wins and losses in the minds of many observers.

Mashoda, 71, has the patience of a kindly old professor, borne of the necessity by Majeristan of finding someone to coach the national team. Mashoda's record with the Portland Timbers in Sarzonia's national football league, two league cups and three league finals appearances in six seasons, also didn't tell the full story.

"The Timbers were in disarray when he got there," said assistant coach Roger Taylor, who was a playmaking midfielder on Mashoda's first Timbers team. "He was able to solidify that team and turn it into a real team instead of a collection of individuals."

Taylor said he did that by being a taskmaster. Mashoda ordered his players to report to training at 7:56 a.m. on the dot. Even being late by two seconds was enough to draw Mashoda's ire, as Taylor can attest. He arrived at the training facility in full uniform at 7:56:02 -- and was promptly held out of the starting 11 the next match.

"I had big problems with him at that time," Taylor said. "I was a long-haired, free-spirited punk kid. I didn't like any authority when he got me back then." Now, Taylor finds himself playing the role of bad cop to Mashoda's good cop. Mashoda lifted a one match suspension Taylor imposed on reserve midfielder Ricky Spriggs for not attending the team's weekly prayer service. Both men say that episode was a result of miscommunication.

"He told Avid but somehow, I didn't get the message that Ricky objected to religious services," Taylor said. "Once we talked things over, we were able to resolve everything." The team no longer has a mandatory weekly prayer session, but most of the players attend services voluntarily.

"Roger and I have a good working relationship," Mashoda said. "We didn't see eye to eye for a long time, but he became my best player on the Timbers. When I was looking for an assistant coach and he wanted to break into coaching, the choice was obvious."

Mashoda is grooming Taylor to take his job eventually, saying, "I'm 71 years old. I can only keep running around the training facility so long before my legs can't keep up."

The combination has worked so far for the Falcons (3-0-1, nine points, Region 1 winners), who play the second round of the Baptism of Fire Cup prior to the team's World Cup debut. During the run, the team has established its identity as a hard-working, defence-oriented side that can take advantage of opponent blunders to score on counterattacks. That's just the way Mashoda likes it.

"It's going to take some time before we can imprint our own style on the world," he said. "Until now, this will have to do."

Second round fixtures:
Majeristan vs Kazoo Peoples (@Estadije Hanin Sekhika, KaMaRi kali)
Southern Universe vs Amorah (@Estadije Matix Veran, Matix kali)
Legalese vs Star Signs (@Estadije Hetkali Divensi, Hetkali)
Apologetic Kittens vs Northern Voobaha (@Estadije Kalisimu Veran, Kalisimu)
The Ardenne vs Schiavonia (@Estadije Sike Veran, Sike kali)
East Lithuania vs Hainan (@Estadije Jinhes Lines, Jinhes kali)
Bazalonia vs Errinundera (@Estadije Nanti, Na~ovi kali)
The Islands of Qutar vs Gruenberg (@Estadije Najajara Ynu, Najajara kali)

Qutar Sports News Network

The news just in, for the next round of the Baptism of Fire, Qutar will be facing Gruenberg at Estadije Najajara Ynu, Najajara kali. This could be quite a tough match as they did win all of the games in their group, but Paul Dove had this to say;

"I'm confident that we can go into this match and be a force to be reckoned with, after the first game we didn't lose heart and won the next three games, with our last result a 5-0 drumming of United Island Empires, the biggest win in the competition so far. We have the momentum and with Gordon back from injury, we're firing on all cylinders and confident we can win"

The medical team may have to be on standby as Gruenberg have a slight reputation as being more aggresive in the tackle than most.

Bof Hopes ALIVE!
Northern Voobaha advances to Elmination Round


For Blue Candle coach Andre Patteson, it's not the most comfortable situation.

"If there's one team in the knockouts I'm afraid of, it's the Kittens. And in typical tournament slani, we draw them right off the top. Honestly, whoever comes out of this match, I think they have a good shot at winning the BoF".

First round opponent Apologetic Kittens story parallels ours. They also had the 5th game bye, and also knew they were advancing, but neither knew if they would have the number one or two slot in their group.

The Kittens were dropped back into the #2 slot in Group 3 after Legalese defeated Havl 3-0 to take the group title.

The similarities also extends to playing style. In their final match, against Basicota, the Kittens used an early goal from Iron Boot.. then switched into a defensive formation at the half to seal the 1-0 win.

"There's no question they're good.. you don't get out of group by playing like crap," Jean-Michel Melby said about AK. "They may not score in bunches like we tend to do, but they use a good defense and solid net play to win 1-0 or 2-1.. like that."

The key matchup: Northen Voobaha's attack (10 goals in 4 matches, lead by Kendara's 3g, 3a) against a stingy Apologetic Kittens defense that only allowed 3 balls into the net in their 4 matches.

" If we score first, I think we can dictate the game," MF Wille Garrett said," that will put pressure on them to score.. and that's not their strength. If we fall behind, they'll just turtle up in that 5-4-1 Coach Moore likes, so getting first blood is our plan."

The knockout round and the Star Signs v Legalese match will both be televised NVNN and simulcast on RNV2. Voobahian language coverage is on NVNN Atletik and RNV Voo.

The pairings were announced today for the knockout stage of the Baptism of Fire, with the Kazoo Peoples facing off against the Majeristan Falcons.

Manni Aka was pleased: "We could have been paired up against a tough opponent like Gruenberg or Bazalonia: both were undefeated! The Falcons have scored the same amount of goals as us, and we've only allowed one more goal than they have! They have lost too -- they're not unstoppable. We will keep our powerful 3-5-2 offense from the last game, same lineup. I have a feeling we'll win this one, but they are a very tough team, make no mistake. We'll play our best, come matchday. Until then, plenty of practice will do us well. That is all."

Second round results:
Presented by: The temple of Karela - Attack means defeat! To Concede is to lose!
(OOC: The name after the @ is the name of the stadium followed by the name of the town it is in after the comma)
Majeristan 1 Kazoo Peoples 4 (@Estadije Hanin Sekhika, KaMaRi kali)
Southern Universe 0 Amorah 0 AET: 0:1 (@Estadije Matix Veran, Matix kali)
Legalese 0 Star Signs 0 AET: 0:0 APK: 4:2 (@Estadije Hetkali Divensi, Hetkali)
Apologetic Kittens 1 Northern Voobaha 1 AET: 2:2 APK: 6:5 (@Estadije Kalisimu Veran, Kalisimu)
The Ardenne 0 Schiavonia 0 AET: 0:1(@Estadije Sike Veran, Sike kali)
East Lithuania 1 Hainan 0 (@Estadije Jinhes Lines, Jinhes kali)
Bazalonia 0 Errinundera 0 AET: 0:0 APK: 3:0 (@Estadije Nanti, Na~ovi kali)
The Islands of Qutar 3 Gruenberg 1 (@Estadije Najajara Ynu, Najajara kali)

Bazalonia kept to a nil-all draw By Nev Gould

After dominating the group round winning all 4 matches our first opponent in the second 'knock-out' round has given the Bazalopes the first draw At the end of full-time both Bazalonia and Errinundera where both kept scoreless, Though the Bazalopes had their chances even with the strong Errinundera defense, The forwards where not able to capitalise on there opportunities and as a result The game went into extra time. However even with those precious extra minutes no one managed to score. So here it comes down to the penalty shoot out. Five potential scoring oppurtunities for each team, Errinundera got to go first.

However with the Errinunderians going first it did not help it at all they ended up scoring zip/zero, nothing... Partly because of their poor ball-handling skills but also a number of good saves by our goalie Jeffery Constantine.

The Bazalopes on the other hand encouraged by the first miss and each subsequent miss by the Errinunderians Peter Hobble, Lucas Reaver & Michael Irchov scored the three goals in the shootouts for Bazalonia. In the after match press conference, the coaching team had this to say about the teams performance.

"We are quite disappointed with our forwards there where a number of opportunities that they had before full-time but did not make the most of them... We will work have an extra training session for our forwards before our next match, whoever it turns out to be. on the other hand I am really proud of our defenders. There quickly and efficiently closed down any goal scorring opportunity. Well apart form that one in the 35th minute where our goalie saved a goal. And I think he should be given the man of the match. His performance was the best we have seen for ages. On another issue... We would like to take special notice of Island of Qutar vs Gruenburg. Our groupmate beating the only other team too score full points in the group round. We'd both like to congratulate Island of Qutar and Commiserate with the team of Gruenburg."

The Schiavone Scribe
SLEEP WINS THE DAY
Schiavonia 0-0 The Ardenne
Schivonia win 1-0 after extra time

Sales of sleeping pills in Schiavonia have dropped significantly since the nation's team started playing football of the teams of other nations.

Of course, Schiavonia isn't really a big market for sleeping pills anyway, with only 0.007 of the population using them anyway, but the teams recent performances have seen that figure drop below 0.001% as viewers fall asleep in front of the TV screeen.

We'd tell you all what happened in the game, but we fell asleep, too. All we know is that we were awakened by a loud cheer, we saw the Schiavone team congratulation Tony Tarmey, and that at that moment, the clock read 117 minutes.

Afterwards, we also found out that striker Craig McAndrew picked up an injury during the game. Filipo Schiavone told us the story.

"All I remember was just falling asleep on the bench, then someone came over to the bench shouting something in the local languaga to us. I saw Craig being taken off on a stretcher, so I yawned, had a bowl of cereal to wake me up, then went out and played. I threw the cereal up shortly afterwards, but then you probably saw that, didn't you?"

Actually Filipo...

Team: Kershaw; O'Kane, Park, Marsden, Smith; Sanderson, Jones, Weir; Topp, Tarmey, McAndrew (Schiavone).


Final Score:
Schiavonia 1 (Tarmey 117)
The Ardene 0





FORD SUES REJISTANIA

SFF Chief Michael Ford has hit out at the Rejistanian governemnt, claiming that they are influencing games using weird glowing balls the locals call va'karela.

"Surely it must be against some UN resolution somewhere to use these things against the subject's will!" Ford claimed on a trip to his lawyers in Kingsbury.

The theory behind the va'karela works like this. It's blue glow hypnotises you, and you think that defening is good. The only antidote has a side effect just as crazy, and if we told you it, you would just throw away your newspaper thinking we were making this up.

There is already evidence that forces are at work. Results from the last World Cup hosted by Rejistania led to a record number of goalless draws, and one Atlantian Oceanic newspaper to hold a competition to see who would get the most 0-0s. The winners, Spruitland, had half of their games finish that way, a record that Schiavonia only wish they could have this time around!

Lowe's only two problem will be tying it down to a particular UN resolution and the stern defence that the Rejistanians will put up. "There's piles of the things to be getting through, so I best be getting on."

Other news, Schiavonia will be sponsored by Sleepeeze sleeping pills for the rest of the Baptism of Fire tournament, in a hope that the association will boost their flagging sales. However, warnings about overdoses will also be highly prevelent.

Finally, only one entry has come in for the Schivone nickname competition, the suggestion of "Lines" from Collonie, in honour of a dyslexic Bedistani team from World Cup 24. However, it has been instantly rejected for it's obvious links with Ford's court case against Rejistania.

Fate Decided In Cruellest Manner

Apologetic Kittens advance. That was phrase on everybodies lips after the fiercely fought match against Northern Voobaha.

Moore was keen to adopt a 5-4-1 formation for the match, but instead opted for his usual 4-1-2-1-2, and it seems to have paid off. Roberts wa splaced ahead of the defence and ordered to mark Kendara. Despite his talents he just couldn't seem to shake Robert for long enough to have a major impact on the game.

But neither side was able to score that vital first goal and the first half passed by without goal. The second half kicked off at a higher pace, with Jerome Moore coming on for Eldon Kiefer to give the Kittens more attacking options.

The strategy paid off with Gronko placing the ball into the net from just inside the area. However this led to a mor epassionate performance from their opponents, showing the kind of football which saw them hit 10 goals in just 4 games and the scores were soon level.

Extra time saw the same level of pace but it seemed the Kittens had lost their edge when they lost their lead. Northern Voobaha soon found themselves 2-1 up and cruising to a win.

However a brilliant run from Newman was finished by a 30 yard shot from Iron Boot which would have likely decapitated the keeper if he'd been able to reach it.

And so the match went to penalties. Alington was unable to stop the Northern Voobaha putting 5 past him. But the Kittens responded in turn to keep the penalty scores level at 5 apiece.

It fell to Newman to net the sixth penalty, and he did so with ease, with a placed shot in the bottom right corner. Thus the situation arose whereby Northern Voobaha needed to score, or face elimination from the competition.

And at this most tense of moments, Alington was there with a magnificent save. You could see the relief on his face as the ball rolled away from the goal. The Kittens were through.

East Lithuania Qualifys after a nation ceased!

We all thought we couldn't do it. But somehow, they've made it. Out of no where the East Lithuania Great Whites some how qualify for the second round! They will face Hainan next, but everyone is somehow surprised that the made it.

"We were just getting on the plane when someone stopped us and said we qualified!" exclaimed Couch Discolo. "When we asked why, we heard that Beleminares ceased to exist. We couldn't believe!"

I'm still thinking it's a dream." GK Weaver said. "But I guess it's not. Well, we have to go get ready. We haven't played in a knockout situation since the U21WC."



Update: East Lithuania Moves on!

Just minutes after the creation of the last article, we learned that the Great Whites advance farther in the knockout stages of BoF! We do not have any quotes from the stars, as the game fineshed moments ago. However, after many letters recieved by our great Dictator Scharfetter, he has made a statement.

"We are not, repeat are not responsible for the sudden cease of Beleminares. We have no idea why it happend, but it did."

East Lithuania is still waiting for it's next opponent. This has haunted the team, however. No East Lithuania sports team has made it past this round in a knockout stage situation. Hopefully, this time will be differant.

OOC: Okay, I couldn't post the fixtures because a friend needed my presence and some things _do_ have a priority to NS. Yes, this is really Rejis saying that.
Quarterfinal scores

Presented by: TV-Esuvortu: Directly, as if you are in the stadium, if we don't transmit it, it has no relevance! (We don't transmit Cherry Cup matches for that reason)

The Kazoo Peoples 1 Amorah 0 (@Estadije Sen-La-Sa~o Relekhati, KaMaRi kali)
Legalese 1 Apologetic Kittens 1 AET: 1:2 (@Estadije Sijitalatirikimidateme Xkora, Sijitalatirikimidateme kali)
Schiavonia 1 East Lithuania 0 (@Estadije KaMaRi Ines, Najajara kali)
Bazalonia 0 The Islands of Qutar 2 (@Estadije Karela Lines, KaMaRi kali)

The Kazoo Peoples continue their forward march into the semifinals after defeating Amorah 1-0 earlier today.

I know, I know, half of you are saying, "wait -- advance to the semifinals!?!?" We regretfully allowed local crazy man Donald McRonald into our press office to give an explanation...

"Well, the problem is, everyone was too busy watching the season finale of the Kazoo Peoples' hit reality show Little Sister, you know, the show where they lock you in a house with cameras everywhere, only to find that you're surrounded by scores of preschool girls."

"Yes, we know... go on," our sports editor said, "I watched it, I know the show, what about the match?"

"Well, I don't like that reality trash, so I was flipping the dial, and I found a Kazoo National team game on! I was so suprised -- the papers were all busy talking about the Little Sister finale, not a nationally televised, world sporting event! And the Kazoos were in the Round of 16, too!

"Unfortunately, I caught only the second half of the game, but the score was nil-nil, so I said 'eh, nothing important could have happened.' A few minutes later, at around the 55-minute mark, I saw a Falcon score a goal! Number 11, I think... yeah, number 11!"

"el Dajani?"

"Yeah, that sounds right...! So as the players were hi-fiving, and whatnot, I did a quick count of the field, and found that there were only nine players, excluding the goalkeeper, of course. Since I have a 120-inch television screen at my house, I could see the entire pitch with ease. I took down all the numbers, and looked at the roster, and found that number 7, Osiris Benoit, was not on the field. So I called up my friend, who was at the game, and he said that a streaker had come onto the field, and Osiris had punched him in the face to stop him. The ref promptly gave him a yellow card, and then, Osirius punched him too! The ref, infuriated, blood streaming down his nose, sent off Osirius. This had happened at the ten-minute mark apparently."

"Who scored goals for the Kazoo Peoples? I mean, they did score four goals apparently..."

"Well, I know both Chadd and Rudy Johnson each had a goal, each assisted by the other, which happened to be their brother. OOH! That was a rhyme! Cool!"

"Well, when did that happen?"

"No, just now! You see, "other" and "brother" end in the same syllable, so it was a rhyme... get it?"

"I mean the goals... *sighs*"

"Oh, they came right after each other: one at 60, I think that one was Chadd's, and then Rudy's at 63."

"Who scored the other two?"

"Perknowleski and Lampshade, unassisted. Perknowleski at 70, Lampshade's at 81."

"Thanks, Donald."

"Yeah, anytime..." Donald shuffles off.

Now, before you go blaming us about not telling you the game was on TV, the game will be availible for sale at all fine retailers today. The game will cost K$0.99 (now with commericals!). You can buy the commercial-free version tomorrow for K$3.99.

But, we have some good news: we have today's game score, and a quick summary:

Kazoos win 1-0. Hermville scores only goal at 33-minute mark unassisted.

We assume the Kazoos will face Apologetic Kittens tomorrow in the semifinals, but we could be mistaken.

Coach Manni Aka had this to say: "The Apologetic Kittens (if that's who we do face, he added later) are a tough team. They aren't a team that you can mess with and distract them with pieces of string, or are cute little animals that are furry and purr when you pet them. No Sir! They are fine nation to face, and I hope we can take this one, and go to the finals!

Updated leaderboard:

Goals:
4 Chadd Johnson
4 Jonny Lampshade
1 Melvin Hermville
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists:
2 Melvin Hermville
2 Rudy Johnson
2 Chadd Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists+Goals:
6 Chadd Johnson
4 Jonny Lampshade
3 Melvin Hermville
3 Rudy Johnson
2 Mark Perknowleski

In a related story, Coach Manni Aka changed his lineup again, from a 3-5-2 to a 3-4-3. He said, "With Hermville having two assists and a goal already, we feel that he can handle a place with the forwards. Despite being a midfielder, I think Hermville can adjust and continue scoring goals. He motioned to a chart, where the new lineup was displayed...:

F M. Hermville C. Johnson J. Lampshade


MF M. Perknowleski R. Johnson M. Sweeny K. Shafur


D Ja. Johnson D. Smirkley M. Munster


GK Jim Johnson

Welcome to the BazSport Radio Network's coverage of the Quarter finals of the Baptism of Fire Tournament. Today we will be facing the Islands of Qutar, fellow members of group 7. Last match Qutar beat the only other team in the competition to have scored a perfect 12, Gruenburg. So lets go to our simulcast with the BazSport TV network, where the national anthems are just about to be sung. Let's go down to the Estadije Karela Lines stadium now...

It's the 30th minute and the Bazalopes are in big trouble the Qutari's have scored a goal and the Bazalopes have not even looked like entering the Qutari half all match. Amazingly the Bazalopes have had the ball, Anthoney Creek, the Bandit's brother has the ball is heading towards the Qutari half.. Oh no Anthony creek has lost the Ball. Qutari midfielder Chris Saunders has stolen the ball and takes it down and results in another goal...

The Bazalonian team is in disarray, Benny Boy goes and confronts Anthony seemingly blaming him for the goal. David McMhaon tries to step in and keep trhings calm but no... Benny boy and Anthony get quite physical and the umpires come in to try and seperate the now three fight. The Bandit comes and joins in the fracas to defend his brother... Now all the the Bazalopes seem to be converging on the fight and joining in... each fighting... It seems.. yes it seems the lines are being drawn over old league lines BSL, SSB & FFSA all against each other the umpires don't seem to be able to do anything all that they attempt does not seem to affect as now all the Bazalopes every single one of them is involved. This indeed is a bad day for Bazalonian soccer.... *5 minutes later* the fight is still going the Qutari's are just sitting back and watching the umpires have run out of ideas and are just standing back waiting for the energy of the fight to dissapate... This indeed will result in Bazalonia's disqualificatiion from the match as well as the Baptism fo Fire tournament as well. Wait the fight seems to be dieing down as the Bazalopes wear themselves out. Well at least the fight is over... and yes the Bazalopes have been disqualified from the match. As was expected. The injured Bazalopes leap off the field all of their fight and enegry had been sapped during the 5 minute brawl. Well there we have it Island of Qutar have won 2:0 in a 30 minute game. The coaches will need to see where they went wrong and also need to bring this team together forgetting old league rivalries and building the team in a cohesive unit. Lets replay the last few minutes as we know work out what to program in place of the rest of the game. This is BazSports coverage of the Baptism of Fire. Bye and seer you during the world cup.

The Schiavone Scribe
SLEEP WINS THE DAY
Schiavonia 1-0 East Lithuania

Schiavonia have finally come out on top after ninety minutes of football after beating East Lithuania by a goal to nil.

Not that the game itself was much of an improvement upon those that had gone before. Play was scrappy, with very few chances for either side.

That was until Schiavone team manager Rodney Lowe came up with a masterstroke, by taking off the ineffective Gary Topp and bringing on midfielder CJ Moore, then pushing on full-backs O'Kane and Smith to make them wing-backs, in effect playing a 2-4-2-2.

All we can say is that it must have worked, because with just seven minutes to go, Smith pushed on to aid an attack, misjudged the length of his cross, and saw the ball curl over goalkeeper Jibreel Weaver's head into the back of the net.

With so few chances in the game, it was enough to see Schiavonia through to the last four, where they will play one of Apologetic Kittens, The Kazoo Peoples or The Islands of Qutar.

"I know who I'd like to face!" said Lowe after the game, "But I think, by the looks of the draw, it's Qutar. If this had been earlier in the tournament, I'd have told you that we'll get absolutely battered. As it is, it will still be the hardest game we have faced yet. Whether or not we'll win, I don't know."

"From the early encounters, I thought that Qutar, the Bazalopes and the Kazoos would be the best three teams. We're down to the last four, and there's one of those three in both games, so I guess I must have been right. But if anyone can upset them, I guess it might have to be us."

Team: Kershaw 8; O'Kane 7, Park 8, Marsden 7, SMITH 9; Sanderson 7, Jones 8, Weir 7; Topp 6 (Moore [62 min] 7), Tarmey 7, Schiavone 7.


Final Score:
Schiavonia 1 (Smith 83)
East Lithuania 0




BETSMEN MAKE KAZOOS FAVOURITES

Schiavone betsmen* Schaibet have officially declared that The Kazoo Peoples are their favourites to win the Baptism of Fire at this stage.

"The Kazoos have been building up slowly, and are now hitting their peak." said spokesman Wesley Graham, "plus we see the Kittens as the weakest of the four teams left, so they arguably have the easiest route to the final."

Schiabet don't think that their own nation will make the final either, with Qutar second favourites to win.

Schiabet's odds in full:

2/1 - The Kazoo Peoples
3/1 - The Islands of Qutar
9/2 - Schiavonia
6/1 - Apologetic Kittens

* - In Schiavonia, a betsman is what you or I would call a bookmaker. However, in Schiavonia, a bookmaker is someone who makes books. What we might call a book binder. Or maybe publisher.

Extra Time Needed Again for Kittens to Advance to Semis

The match was boring. As much as this reporter wants the Kittens to do well, the match wasn't that great. It has seen bookmakers in other nations count the Kittens as the otuside chance in the tournament.

The tedious draw was settled by a penalty in the added time, and many fans were commenting that they expected more entertaining football at this stage in the competition.

The Legalese players seem to have given up on the competition, and the Kittens didn't really seem much more willing.

I'm sure they've received a pasting from the coach, and will go through with some more spirit into the semis.

The Kazoos spent 14 hours of sleeping today,...

("We were inspired by Schiavonia," coach Manni Aka said later, "which is not to say we want a scoreless match late into the second half," he added hastily, reclining in a comfy chair. "No pictures please--" as a cameraman rose his camera to take a picture of the half-asleep, "the flash might bother my rest." He then sent off all reporters, and asked yours truly to turn the light off on the way out the door)

...followed by 7 hours of practice, getting used to the new 3-4-3 formation.

"This is a good formation. Even though it is our third formation of the tournament (4-4-2, 3-5-2, and now 3-4-3), but that doesn't mean were unconfident in our offense. We just want to make our offense more superb."

"I think I'm settled into the formation," said Melvin Hermville, "but we'll see tomorrow, huh?"

The Kazoo Peoples face the Apologetic Kittens tonight.

People Place Bets
Upon local casinos putting odds on the Kazoos to win at odds of 2:1, local Kazoons (Kazooians? Kazooans? Who knows, we've never spoke of our country's people before) raced to cashiers, putting bets on the Kazoos to win the Baptism of Fire.

"I just put me life's savings on the Kazoos," said local crazy man Donald McRonald, "which equates to about K$14, a paper clip, and a piece of aluminum foil. If I win, I'd end up with two paper clips, two pieces of aluminum foil, oh, and yeah, K$28. If they lose, I won't care -- I still have my inherited K$12,000,000 house to fall back on."

"I thought you said you put your life's savings on the Kazoos: what about your house?"

"No, my savings is just what I had saved up. My house is a separate entity."

"Whatever, Donald."

The Kazoo Peoples' largest industry is in the sector of gambling, generating lots of money each year.

The largest city with the most rampant gambling is the booming city of Monte Carlico, with 1,593 casinos, and a population of 3 million, with visitors totaling 70 million each year.

[OOC: This post also features in the Pre-cup RP thread, but as it is also relevant here, I have decided to include it here too.]

Michael Ford is at his solicitors, Marshall & Law, talking over the case he has filed against the nation of Rejistania.

"So... what can we do them on?"

"Well... Resolution #53 Freedom of Choice."

"Meaning..."

"These va'karela that they use control people's minds into thinking that defence is beautiful, even though it quite clearly isn't."

"Great! So let's get onto them!"

"Now hang on, you can't rush into these things like that!"

"Well, whyever not?"

"Well, first things first. Schiavonia isn't actually a UN member state. The resolution states that it is relevant to a populace."

"And?"

"Well, that kind of means that if the Schiavone team were Rejistanian, it would be OK. But they aren't."

"But can't we get someone who is in the UN to be on our side?"

"They would have to put the case forward themselves. Now we have contacted a few people, and the government of Fmjphoenix said they would help if they could, but when we told them the complexities of the whole thing, they backed down."

"Complexities?"

"Well, for starters, Rejistania is the home of defence. Therefore the defence lawyers there are among the best in the world. Even more get their education there."

"Oh."

"So there wouldn't be much chance on that front. Then there's the actual workings of the va'karela. They don't actually take over the mind, just subliminally alter the way it thinks temporarily."

"But that's what mind control is!"

"I'm afraid that mind control is slightly different. Any lawyer worth his salt would pick up on that."

"Are you trying to defend them?"

"What?"

"The way you're going on. Are you... on the Rejistanian's side?"

"Oh, don't be so ludicrous. I mean, you're paying us, not them. We're just advising you best we can. And our advice is that you drop the lawsuit."

"WHAT?"

"Drop the lawsuit. You'd rather make a slight fool of yourself backing down now as you're looking at the evidence than afterwards, when you've gone in with a load of useless evidence that doesn't hold up and been absolutely humiliated. Wouldn't you?"

"I... suppose..."

"Right. Well we'll write back to them to tell them that they've no case to answer and that it has all been a grave misunderstanding, OK?"

"Yes. I suppose it's for the best."

Ford stood up and shook the hands of Marshall, then the silent Law. "Well, thanks for your help. The cheque will be in the post in the morning."

And with that, he left.

Semifinal Scores:

Presented by: Esuvortu radio: All the scores, all the time!

The Kazoo Peoples 2 Apologetic Kittens 0 (@Estadije Hades Lavamje, KaMaRi kali)
Schiavonia 0 The Islands of Qutar 0 AET: 0:0 APK: 1:2 (@Estadije Ines Karela Lines, KaMaRi kali)

Final:
The Kazoo Peoples vs The Islands of Qutar (@Estadije Ines Karela Lines, KaMaRi kali)

Third Place Playoff:
Schiavonia vs Apologetic Kittens (@Estadije Sen-La-Sa~o Relekhati, KaMaRi kali)

Coach suffers heart attack
Team left scrambling

Majeristan's national team coach Avid Mashoda was rushed to hospital late last night after suffering a heart attack minutes after his team completed a training session before the kickoff of World Cup XXVI.

Mashoda, 71, previously served as the Talzecki Tides coach when the would-be breakaway colony of Sarzonia established its own "national" side even though the parent nation of Sarzonia didn't recognise its independence. He was discovered by assistant coach Roger Taylor after Taylor arrived in Mashoda's office to discuss the team's practice.

"At this time, Avid Mashoda is in guarded condition," a hospital spokeswoman said. "He is being given the best care available to him and we are praying for his speedy recovery."

Taylor will serve as the team's acting head coach until Mashoda's status can be determined. The Majeristani Football Association has placed a call to "any available coach with World Cup experience" to serve as the team's full-time interim coach.

"This is a devastating moment in the early history of Majeristani football," Taylor said at a press conference. "Avid was dead set on coaching the team in its first game and he's hoping the team can rise up and overcome this terrible circumstance and rally together as a team."

Doctors have said the signs point to a "major" heart attack, but say that Taylor "saved his life" by calling 911 straight away.

Mashoda is reported to be at least 15 kilograms overweight and is eating a diet high in animal fats and low in fruits and vegetables. Akbar Mashoda, Avid's son and a former assistant coach for his father, said the heart attack "should be a wake up call" for his father.

"He's going to have to undergo a new programme of diet and exercise," Akbar Mashoda said. "For him to keep up the frenetic pace of a national team coach, he's going to have to watch his health."

Mashoda said before the World Cup that he intended to step down after the World Cup finals and turn the job over to Taylor, saying "managing in the World Cup is a young man's game." However, he said he wanted "one last go of the World Cup" because he thought the Falcons had talent.

"I want to see this programme prosper before I hang up my coaching credentials for good," he said in an interview conducted just two days before his heart attack.

The Kazoo Peoples national football team advanced to the Baptism of Fire finals today, after defeating the Apologetic Kittens 2-0.

A very drunk Manni Aka said, "The only apologizing we'll be doing to the Apologetic Kittens is that we whooped 'em in the semifinals, and that we're ssorrry... for being... sooooo gooo ... o ... od!" as he subsequently passed out.

"He'll be okay," said Hermville, who scored both goals (3 throughout Baptism of Fire) in the semifinal match, earning him player of the game, "when he does this, he's good in 12 hours. Our match is in 22 hours, so we'll be fine."

It almost looked like a Schiavonian (sorry folks if this is not the right spelling -- we think we might be ignorant) match for the first half, with neither team scoring until Hermville's miraculous goal at the 50-minute mark. On a corner kick by Lampshade, Hermville found an opening and headed it into the goal, making the score 1-0. Lampshade was credited with an assist.

And it looked like the final score would be 1-0, but with the Kittens threatening at minute 75, nothing was certain. When attacking midfielder Munroe began to show a late burst of energy, the entire tempo of the game changed, and it became a Kitten-fest as Ironmonger and Gronko sensed the forward push, and prepared themselves for attack. Within the next ten minutes, 14 shots were made, 9 on target. All 9 were defended beautifully by our goalkeeper Johnson, and the rally ended when Monroe passed out from exhaustion -- or so it seemed. Upon play stoppage, and medics were rushed on the field, Monroe jumped up, took the ball, and shot it past stunned goalie Johnson. The referee promptly gave a red card to Monroe, and the goal was negated, the Kittens down to 10 members, the Kittens shifting to a 4-3-2 formation at the departure of Monroe. The free kick given to The Kazoo Peoples was enough, as the ball was cleared, and immediately following the incident, at minute 87, Melville scored his second goal, assisted by Rudy Johnson (3).

Said Kitten head coach Woodrow Moore, "Enrique [Munroe] made a bad choice. We all do at times, but Munroe made a fatal error, took the energy out of our rally, and ultimately lost us the game."

For his own protection, Munroe was taken off the field by a set of 4 highly annoyed Rejistani policemen sporting riot gear. Munroe was randomly shifted throughout the night to prevent a crazed fan attacking Munroe.

"The Rejistanian police force did a good job in keeping me safe," said Munroe in a written statement later that night. "I am very sorry for what I did, and I hope my nation will forgive me."

Fans, after the red card, immediately started throwing garbage and other trash onto the field. The ref then awarded the rabid Kitten... er, Apologetic Kitten fans with a red card. All of the estimated 34,000 fans who showed up to support the Apologetic Kittens were escorted out of the stadium, and were each punished with a slap on the wrist with a wet noodle.

Updated leaderboard:

Goals:
4 Chadd Johnson
4 Jonny Lampshade
3 Melvin Hermville
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists:
3 Rudy Johnson
2 Melvin Hermville
2 Chadd Johnson
1 Jonny Lampshade
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists+Goals:
6 Chadd Johnson
5 Melvin Hermville
5 Jonny Lampshade
3 Rudy Johnson
2 Mark Perknowleski

The Kazoo Peoples face the very tough Islands of Qutar national team tomorrow in the finals.

Said Manni Aka: "I think we'll do well, and hopefully, win. They sport a very tough 4-4-2, but I think we can conquer them."

In other related news, all bets are off (at least, most of them are) on the old odds. With so much money being put on the Kazoos to win the finals, odds have changed slightly, from 2:1 to 7:4 (i.e. 2x to 1 3/4x original bet). Said local insane person Donald McRonald, oddly sporting a clown costume for our interview, "If the Kazoos win, are they really gonna pay me 1 3/4 paperclips and 1 3/4 pieces of aluminum foil? What madness!" The casino later said in a written statement that they would give Donald a full two paperclips and aluminum foil pieces, provided the Kazoo Peoples win. This led to other complaints about live animals being bet on the Kazoos, and what to do if the Kazoos win. Said the bet-keepers: "any bets deemed 'unusual' by our investigators and/or non-pheasible (such as live animals) fufillment of bets will be paid out at the 2:1 ratio for 'nonsense' items such as paper clips..." ("it's not nonsense," shouted Donald McRonald from his straightjacket) "and for animals, the bettor would be paid out 3/4 cash value of animal in addition to the animals being returned, minus cleaning costs related to the animal." They added, "horses do make quite a mess."

OOC: Have been ill for the past couple of days, so have been unable to RP, will post the RPs in another location

Qutar Sports News Network

Good Morning Qutar, well we've made it to the Semi Finals, defeating Gruenburg in the second round, and defeating group rivals Bazalonia in the Quarter Finals, and now its the the semi finals and victory against Schiavonia would put Qutar in the final. Well the teams are coming out onto the pitch now, and they both look fired up as they sing their national anthems. It looks like it will be Qutar to kick the match off.

Ali starts the game off, passing to Thomas, who is closed down fast by Jones. They're going to have to play at their best to get past the midfield and defence of Schiavonia, he passes it to Chris Saunders to in under pressure, and has to pass it to Tomlin, who managed to get past the midfield, he's making a run down the left, he's got past O'Kane, see's Ali running in and gets a cross in, it meets the head of Ali, oh great save by Kershaw who holds onto the ball and sends it up the field, and Sanderson latches onto the ball, and is moving down the left, and Saunders comes out to tackle him, but Sanderson manages to get a pass to Topp, who goes for a shot from outside the box, oh great save by Stone there, he managed to tip it over the bar, and its a corner for Schiavonia, and its Moore to take it, who gets it into the box, Stone goes out to claim the ball, he it outjumped by Schiavone though, who heads it toward goal but Lemkes manages to stop it on the line, oh I bet all the Qutar Fans had their hearts in their mouths, I know I did. We're about thirty minutes into this game now, and both teams have had good chances but have stayed strong in the midfield, with neither team breaking through since, oh wait speak of the devil, Thomas has just broken through and he's got Ali in support, he gets past Marsden and passes to Ali the keeper is stranded, oh no its hit the post, Ali hold his head in his hand, it could so easyly been 1-0 to Qutar. It looks like Thomas has gone to console him. Its a goal kick for Schiavonia and Kershaw gets it up the pitch to Jones, who sees Schiavone making a run gets it through, he's one on one with Stone, who comes out and, oh what a save! Timed to perfection! The referee blows for half time, and thanks to Stone it's still 0-0 at half time.

Welcome back, it looks like the second half is about to begin, with both teams out on the pitch, and both looking for a goal to swing things in their favour. Schiavonia kick off the second half, and try to make a move forward but Chris Saunders takes the ball off Schiavone, and makes a move forwards, he's got Ali and Thomas ahead of him and Tomlin and Parker, to the left and right of him, he passes to Parker who makes a run down the right, gets past Smith, and gets a cross into the box, Ali heads it toward goal, but Kershaw punches the ball out, but only so far as Gordon, who get a fierce shot in, but oh! It hits the crossbar, and goes out for a goal kick, what bad luck! Who can see the power of the shot, and the crossbar is still shuddering. Kershaw manages to get the ball up the field, but Gordon outjumps Jones, and tries to get forward, but he's been brought down by Jones, must be a yellow card, and yes it is, Jones will have to be carefull now. Free kick to Qutar, and it looks like Gordon will be the one to take it, he spots Ali making a run, and gets the ball to his head, he heads it over Kershaw, but oh no its hit the crossbar aswell, he beat the keeper but not the crossbar! Schiavonia have tightened up their midfield and defence since then, and neither team have been able to get through on goal, and we're now in the last ten minutes of play, and it looks like Qutar have broken the deadlock with Parker getting through down the right side of midfield, he sees Thomas in the box, and get the cross in, Thomas heads it, its beaten the keeper, but just by a whisker gone wide. Lady Luck isn't with Qutar at the moment, as Schiavonia start play off again, with Kershaw getting the ball, up to Jones, who gets past Gordon, and he's going at quite a pace now, but Lemkes is closing down on him, and he shoots, but another great save by Stone, just got his fingertips to that one, and that the last play of normal time, it seems extra time or penalties will decide the game.

Welcome back, it the first period of extra time, lasting 15 minutes, followed by the second period of extra time also lasting 15 minutes, and if that half an hour can't decide the match, we go into penalty kicks. And its Qutar to start the first period off, both teams tired out from the 90 minutes of normal play. Ali starts things off, and he gets it to Thomas, who is being closed down by Jones, but he manages to get past him, and he's flying down the pitch now, Marsden has come out to close him down, but he skips over the tackle, and he's through on goal, goes for the shot, but not again! Its hit the post! the woodwork is not favouring them tonight. Kershaw starts play off again, gets it up to Jones, who makes a move down the pitch, sees Tarmey in space, get the ball to him, he's through on goal, but Stone comes out, and smothers the ball. Stone hits it up the pitch, and the referee blows his whistle for the end of the first period, and it still remains 0-0.

Welcome back, it's the second period of extra time now, with neither team being able to break the deadlock, as the score still remains at 0-0. Its Schiavonia to kick off, and Schiavone starts play off, passing to Topp, he tries to make a move forward but possesion is taken off him by Tomlin, who makes a move down the left of the field, he's got past Sanderson, and he jumps over O'Kane's tackle, sees Thomas in the box get the cross in, but Kershaw manages to claim the ball, and sends it straight back up the pitch, and Qutar have been caught on the counter attack, its four men on two at the moment, Jones gets it to Schiavone, but great recovering tackle from Lemkes there, who rushes the ball back up to Gordon, and we're in the last minute before penalties, and Gordon gets it to Thomas, who gets past Moore, and Marsden comes out to tackle him, he sees Ali, he shoots it a Goal!!!! Qutar have won it in the last minute!!! WHAT!!! The goals been disallowed, offside! The Qutari players are mobbing the linesman, and protesting the decision, the referee comes to break things up, and give Thomas a yellow card, for dissent. Free kick to Schiavonia, Kershaw takes it as the referee blows his whistle, it's penalties to decide this one then.

Welcome back, two hours of normal play have past, and now the match will be decided by penalties, each team have five penalties, and if the score remains equal after all ten penalties, sudden death will ensue.

Schiavonia will take the first kick, and Stone goes out to defend his goal, it looks like Topp, yes Topp will take the first penalty, he lines it up, runs up for the shot, oh what a save by Stone, he read Topp like a book, what a good save!

Kershaw goes out to defend the goal, and it will be Thomas to take Qutar's first penalty, he lines up the ball, runs up for the shot, YES!!! He scores!! Kershaw went complety the wrong way and its 1-0 to Qutar!

Stone goes out to defend his goal again, already one saved, can he do it again, and it will be Tarmey to try to score, he runs up for the shot, Stone's done it again, what a good save, Stone's on fire tonight.

Kershaw goes out to defend the goal, Schiavonia need him to save this one, and its Tomlin to try to make it 2-0 for Qutar, he shoots, oh its hit the post, Kershaw went the wrong way, but it's hit the post, and Tomlin is shaking his head in disbelief.

Stone goes out for the third time, with two save under his belt can he make it three, it will be Jones trying to make it third time lucky for Schiavonia. He goes for the shot, and I don't beileve it, Stone has done it again, three saves out of three, the Qutari players are mobbing him.

Kershaw goes out, needing to save this, as it will take some effort to beat Stone, and it will be Chris Saunders trying to make it 2-0 in Qutar's favour. He goes for the shot, and the woodwork has done it again, this time the crossbar!

Stone has really got the crowd going, he can't really make it four out of four can he, well Moore will be the one trying to make it only three out of four. He goes for the shot, oh how on earth did Stone save that! It was going in the top right hand corner and somehow he tipped it over the bar.

Kershaw goes out knowing that if Qutar score now the game will be over, and it will be Parker trying to put the match out of reach for Schiavonia, he goes for the shot and its hit the other post, he can't believe it and neither can I.

Well its Stone to go out, and can he make it an unbeilivable five out of five saved, its Schiavone to try to break Stone's saving record, he goes for the shot, and oh no, just beyond the reach of Stones fingertips, no-one can blame Stone for that, but he's holding his head, the Qutari players go to cheer him up.

It all rests on this penalty, Kershaw goes out to defend the goal, and Ali makes the long walk to take the final penalty, if he scores it will be Qutar's victory, but will the woodwork stop it. Ali goes for the shot, he completely fooled Kershaw, and its a goal, the woodwork didn't stop that one!! Qutar have won the penalty kicks 2-1!!!! We're in the final!! Oh yes we're there!!


The Islands of Qutar 0 (0) - (0) 0 Schiavonia

After Penalty Kicks:

The Islands of Qutar 2 - 1 Schiavonia
Thomas :: Scored Topp :: Saved
Tomlin :: Missed Tarmey :: Saved
C.Saunders :: Missed Jones :: Saved
Parker :: Missed Moore :: Saved
Ali :: Scored Schiavone :: Scored

Monroe Red-Carded as Kittens Dumped Out Of Competition

The match against the Kazoo Peoples started off like most Kittens matches, with the defence working overtime, waiting for the chance to counter-attack. That chance didn't arrive, but the defence held tight to keep the scores level at half time.

The second half started in a livelier manner. Unfortunately for the Kittens it was the Kazoo Peoples who were the lively side. And just 5 minutes into the second half it paid off, with Hermville heading in a corner by Lampshade.

The match began to liven up again though with Monroe the inspiration behind a series of stunning attacks on goal. But the opposition keeper Johnson played superbly and kept the strikes out. Though some fans claim they could see him clenching his fists to avoid showing the pain after a couple shots by 'Iron Boot' practically took the gloves off his hands.

Monroe, however, had been run ragged, and seemingly collapsed. The medics were sent on, and whilst everyone watched, worried for the young man, he smacked the ball past Johnson, who was outside his area at the time also making sure Monroe wasn't in too bad a state.

Unfortunately the goal was disallowed and Monroe promptly sent off.

"I'm sorry I did it, but the pub team near me used it to win their cup final, I thought I'd give it a shot."

Left without Monroe to drive the attacks Roberts was brought forward to help the Kittens achieve that vital goal. However the measures were counterproductive and Hermville hammered his second of the match past Alington.

The final match of the tournament will be played without Monroe, and it is expected 'Ant' Aultman will take his place for the third-place decider against Schiavonia.

Qutar Sports News Network

In a press conference called today by the QFA, every one seemed in high spirits, as Qutar is just one victory away from winning the Baptism of Fire Tournament, Paul Dove had this to say;

"The team is in high spirits after the last match, we're on a winning streak and we are confident of victory. We know that it will be a tough match, but I believe in my team, and that they can go all the way, and with Stone in the form he is, any goal getting past him would have to be a miracle goal."

The Islands of Qutar have gone football mad, and in the major cities giant screens are being set up in the parks for people to watch the match.

"We have reports that the Islands of Qutar have set up huge televisions in screens in local parks to watch the match. We want to be better than them."

So today, the Kazoo People government announced today that they would give free admission to any stadium in the nation which had a JumboTron or other large screen to watch the game. There are about 3 1/2 million seats availible throughout the nation, and fans lined up early today so that they could get inside.

"I think it's a great idea," said one Kazoos-crazed fan inside a stadium a few hours before the game, after waiting about 12 hours to get in the stadium. "Instead of watching it on a paltry 60-inch screen at home or a pub, I can watch it on like, a 20-foot screen at a stadium with 90,000 other screaming fans. It's like a pub, times like, 30,000!"

In fact, some stadiums have set up chairs on the pitch to allow for even greater capacity during the event. Fans can sit there for a nominal fee to cover costs of providing free stadium usage.

--
"I'm fine," said Manni Aka, who last night passed out during an interview with local media. "I didn't know my limits. I should have drunk less, but I recovered. I am in full strength to coach the match today."

The final:

The Kazoo Peoples 2 The Islands of Qutar 3 (@Estadije Ines Karela Lines, KaMaRi kali)


The Vinali Tikira/3rd place playoff:
Schiavonia 1 Apologetic Kittens 2 (@Estadije Sen-La-Sa~o Relekhati, KaMaRi kali)

Congratulations and commiserations as appropriate... Thanks to everyone who RPed in this cup! I hope to see you on international stage making an impact as well (unless it's against the Orange-Blues of Rejistania :) ).

"Qutar takes the Fire" by Nev Gould

Afer beating the Bazalopes in the Quarter finals the Island of Qutar has not only made it to the final but have beaten The Kazoo Peoples with a scoreline reminiscent of our match on the first Match day. With Qutar being the ones that scored the 3 to 2 win instead of the Bazalopes. Caine Hawdon was seen crying out ... "We should have been their.... We beat them ." The other coaches however have been on record congratulating the Qutari team and saying... "Well If the Bazalopes could not win... At least someone from our group did." After a recent survey of Bazalonians playing NMSoft's World Cup 26 game they have found that Bazalonia's favourite underdog is not the Bazalopes the Qutaries. Can the management restore the nations hope in the Bazalopes or will we ever be resigned to be mediocre? I for one hope that the management will kick itself in the Wazoo and get the team ready for it's priemire appearance in the world cup.

Qutar Sports News Network

Good Morning Qutar, we're at Estadije Ines Karela Lines in KaMaRi kali for the final of the Bapitsm of Fire Tournament, and what a final this should be but pundits have been tipping Qutar as the favourites. It looks like the teams are coming out onto the pitch now, yes they are, and oh the roar of the fans in the stadium is incredible, the anthems have been sung and now its time for the game.

It looks like The Kazoo Peoples have won the toss, and are going to kick off first, and Lampshade starts the final of the Baptism of Fire off, The Kazoo Peoples are starting strongly, with Johnson moving the ball forward, Gordon comes out to close him down, but he passes back to Perknowleski, who pushes forward, getting past Gordon, and he sees Lampshade making a move, he drills a pass to him, but well cut out by Lemkes there, and he gets it back up to Gordon, who making a break on the counter attack, he's got Ali and Thomas ahead of him, he sees Thomas gets the past through, Scovest comes out to challenge him, but Thomas gets the past to Ali, who's clean on goal, and he slams it into the top right corner!!! 1-0 Qutar!! We're six minutes in and already Qutar are in the lead!!!

The Kazoo Peoples start the match off again, the goal doesn't seem to have shaken them, in fact they seem more determined than ever, as they kick off Chadd Johnson is making strides through the midfield, he gets past Chris Saunders and Gordon, Lemkes is coming out to close him down, but he passes it to Lampshade who's through on goal, he shoots and oh Stone manages to tip it over the bar, its gone for a corner, I think it will be Perknowleski to take the corner, yes he's going to take the corner, he swings it in, but Stone comes out and safely claims it as his own, and sends it back up the pitch, to Gordon who tries to break on the counter, but Jack Johnson takes back possesion for The Kazoo Peoples, and sends it back to the waiting players and The Kazoo Peoples have got Qutar outnumbered but Perknowleski goes for the shot, what a save by Stone there, how did he pull that one off, well the crowd are loving his athletic display of goalkeeping, and so am I. It seems that both teams have tightened up things in the midfield and defence, with neither team getting through with any real chances on goal, and we are about forty minutes into the match, and Qutar seem to have relaxed a bit with only five minutes remaining, but its seems it might cost them as Perknowleski has broken through and he's got support in the form of Lampshade and C.Johnson, and he sees C.Johnson making a move, he passes to him, oh he's got past Kelly, he's on goal, but Stone is coming out, C.Johnson chips the ball over Stone, its hit the crossbar, and its coming back out, Lampshade is running in and hits it home, oh no The Kazoo Peoples have equalised things on the stroke of half time, where was Stone's defence?

As the teams come out for the second half, we can only wonder at what Paul Dove had to say to his players letting The Kazoo Peoples equalise on the stroke of half time. The momentum will be with The Kazoo Peoples and Qutar really need to push forward and put the game beyond The Kazoo Peoples reach.

Its Qutar to start the second half off and Ali gets things started by passing to Thomas, who makes a move forward but has lost possesion to Perknowleski, who is making a move forward, and he has got support, he spots Lampshade in space, he moves forward and gets past Kelly, and sees Chadd Johnson in space, passes the ball to him, and hes fires a shot in, Stone got his fingertips to it, its hit the post and rolled in, oh cruel fate, the woodwork in this stadium has something against Qutar!! The Kazoo Peoples now lead 2-1....

Chris Saunders is really going to have to pull his team together, to come back from this, and he's having a talk with the team while The Kazoo Peoples are celebrating, lets hope he can get his team back in focus.

Qutar start the match off again, and Thomas starts making a move forward which Ali spots, and gives him the ball, and Thomas it slicing through their midfield, he's outside the box he about to shoot, but Smirkley lunges in with a two-footed tackle, and oh Thomas looks like he's in a lot of pain, and the Qutari players are converging on Smirkley, and Chris Saunders is having hold back Ali, who really is being taunted by Smirkley, and the referee has finally come over, and promptly books Smirkley for the challenge on Thomas, and cautions Ali over his reaction to the tackle. Thomas is being taken off the pitch on a stretcher, his holding his leg, and in a lot of pain at the moment. It looks like Ali's teamate from Cëre United is to replace Thomas, yes Siese is coming on the replace the injured Thomas. Now that the air has cleared from the foul, Chris Saunders will take the free kick from just outside the box, he drills it in, but oh its hit the crossbar, but its come back out and Siese latches on to in, but its deflected off a defender for a corner. It will be Tomlin to take the corner, he gets it in and onto the head of Siese, but oh just over the bar for a goal kick. Its about twenty minutes into the second half and the momentum is definately on Qutar's side its just a matter of time till they score the equaliser, and its Parker on the ball at the moment, hes running down the right flank dancing past Shafur, and he puts on a burst of pace and gets past Scovest, and he gets a cross into Ali who's waiting in the box, he puts a brilliant header down to the bottom left corner of the goal, and its beaten the keeper!!!! Qutar have Equalised!!! The fans are going wild, and an eerie silence comes from The Kazoo Peoples side of the stadium.

The Kazoo Peoples start the match off again with the game all square but with the momentum definately on Qutar's side, and they have lost possesion allready, Gordon taking possesion of the ball, and spotting Tomlin making a run down the left wing, he gets it into Siese, who heads it, but only so far as Jim Johnson's hands. He launches the ball into Qutar's half in a deperate bid to move his players forward, but it only goes so far as Chris Saunders, who immediatly moves forward, and the Qutari midfield are surgeing forward, stringing pass after pass, Chris Saunders to Gordon, Gordon to Parker, Parker to Tomlin, Tomlin to Ali, and Ali shoots its a goal!!! Qutar are in the lead 3-2!!, the crowd has gone wild, and oh not again! The goal has been disallowed for Ali being in an offside position. Lets look at the replay when he makes his run, oh he's is fractionally offside and I can only barely make out he is on the slowed down replay, how on earth did the lineman know, he should have given the benefit of the doubt, and thats certainly what the Qutari fans think. We're nearing the end of play, and it seems that The Kazoo Peoples are trying to hold out till extra time when they can regroup but I don't see Qutar allowing that, and they're making another move forward and we're in the last couple of minutes, and Siese has got the ball see's Ali making a run, he gives it to Ali, he gets past Perknowleski, now he's past Shafur, he got Smirkley and Scovest coming in for the tackle, but he skips over the tackle, he one on one with the goalkeeper, he hits the ball one way and runs the other round the goalkeeper, goes back to collect the ball, and hits it home, what a goal to win the final with!! What a goal!! And the crowd is going crazy as Ali runs round the staduim in celebration, around The Islands of Qutar in all the parks, pubs, and peoples home, everyone is celebrating. We've done it!!! The referee blows his whistle to make it official, we are the champions!

As the players for The Kazoo Peoples go to collect their second place medals, the crowd is waiting for the moment, as the Qutar players collect their winners medals, Ali, Siese, Tomlin, Gordon, Parker, Lemkes, Nick Saunders, Kelly, Howell, Stone, and here is the moment as Chris Saunders lifts up the trophy for the Baptism of Fire!!!


The Islands of Qutar 3 (1) - (1) 2 The Kazoo Peoples
Ali, 6, 67, 90 Lampshade, 45
C.Johnson, 47

The Schiavone Scribe
FOURTH FOR SCHIAVONIA
Schiavonia 0-0 The Islands of Qutar (Qutar win 2-1 on penalties)
Schiavonia 1-2 Apologetic Kittens


Schiavonia finally lost a game at the Baptism of Fire tournament. But it wasn't the semi-final.

Oh no. That was another goalless encounter. Even the penalties in the shootout didn't seem to want ot go in, with just three of a possible ten hitting hte back of the net. Unfortunately, only one of those was a Schiavone kick, and out we went.

Except with it being a semi-final, Schiavonia earned the rather arduous honour of taking part in a really pointless game for third place,

It seemed that Schiavonia weren't really interested in finishing third, with Rodney Lowe fielding a completely different team from the one which faced Qutar, and paying the price. Despite an early goal from Craig McAndrew, the kittens just wanted it more, and ran out winners by two goals to one.

But then, Schiavonia is looking forward more to the World Cup qualifiers, where they'll more than likely come up against some more familiar names, than a tournament blighted by the hosts' influence on making teams defend. Let's just hope we don't face Rejistania in qualifying, eh?

Kazoo Peoples lose 3-2 to The Islands of Qutar

The Islands of Qutar 3 (1) - (1) 2 The Kazoo Peoples
Ali, 6, 67, 90 Lampshade, 45
C.Johnson, 47

Though tied 1-1 at the half, a goal at the last second pushed the The Islands of Qutar into the lead, and essentially the win.

"I'm still proud of our boys. I want them to keep their heads high, and not worry too much about this. We came second out of forty teams, and that is a great international accomplishment. We are going to take this into World Cup 26, and win a good number of games, possibly even win the Cup. Our team has so much momentum, we might have the drive it takes to win the Cup," said Coach Manni Aka, tears streaming down his face as he was presented a second place trophy and medals.

"I feel really bad I let my team down," said Jim Johnson, goalkeeper who allowed a last second goal to give the Islands of Qutar the victory, "If I hadn't allowed that last goal, we might've gone to Extra Time and won. And what bums me out is that I let them score three times [Editor's note: Ali had all three], all by the same guy! But I have confidence that we will again do well in World Cup 26."

"I'm real pleased with our fans," Aka said at a later interview, "A lot made the trek out to Rejistania, and were there when we need it most. And for all those who couldn't, thanks for watching us on TV in pubs, sports bars, and stadia all across this great land." Aka, nudged in the ribs by the Rejistani police chief, hastily said, "However, I do not condone our fans beating up The Islands of Qutar fans. This is not acceptable conduct and you will be punished." Aka glanced over, got a nod, and continued. "I'd also like to congratulate the team of The Islands of Qutar for winning the Baptism of Fire, and I'd also like to congratulate their commentators for doing such a great job telling the game how it is." [[OOC: Your RP was amazing! Keep it up and you'll keep winning!]]

Dirk Smirkley also had a few words to say: "I am really sorry for challenging Thomas so hard and injuring him quite bad. I hope he is all right, and I will pay for all medical expenses related to the incident."

The Kazoo Peoples had 5 wins, 1 draw, and 2 losses for a final point total of 16 in 8 matches, an average of 2 points per game.

Manni Aka has announced his formation for WC26, but has not announced his intention to change it to the 3-4-3 (Used against Apologetic Kittens, The Islands of Qutar), the 3-5-2 (Amorah, Majeristan, Dagabom), or keep the 4-4-2 (Southern Universe, Dehny, Keyshona). The record for each formation:
3-4-3: 1-1-0
3-5-2: 3-0-0
4-4-2: 1-1-1

It clearly looks as if they will switch for WC26, but who knows?

Chadd Johnson (assisted by Lampshade, 47) and Lampshade (assisted by Chadd Johnson, 45) each got a goal, to bring the final leaderboard to:

FINAL leaderboard:

Goals:
5 Chadd Johnson
5 Jonny Lampshade
3 Melvin Hermville
1 Rudy Johnson
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists:
3 Chadd Johnson
3 Rudy Johnson
2 Melvin Hermville
2 Jonny Lampshade
1 Mark Perknowleski

Assists+Goals:
8 Chadd Johnson
7 Jonny Lampshade
5 Melvin Hermville
3 Rudy Johnson
2 Mark Perknowleski

See you at World Cup 26!

[[OOC: Due to RL issues/illness (and, partly, Jolt eating my post), I didn't get this post up sooner. Sorry. Thanks to Rejistania for hosting the BoF, and The Islands of Qutar for a great match. Also, thanks to all teams, especially those who RP and made this tournament really good. Rejistania, what was my RP bonus/KBP points thingies, now that I am out? You can TG this to me if you want. Thanks.]]