NationStates Jolt Archive

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The World Cup has become an institution - now in its 25th incarnation and as popular as ever, with 100 nations from Adam Island to Yafor 2 competing for 30 qualifying places this time.

History is to be made. Extraordinary things will happen.

Even with memories of Liverpool England's last-gasp winner against Sarzonia fresh in the minds of billions, the buildup to the Silver Jubilee World Cup has already begun. Excitement is building all over again.

In this preview, we'll be following news across the footballing world as teams prepare to do battle once again for the ultimate sporting prize.

OOC: and now it's your turn to produce that news. Any kind of RP is welcome.

It was a sad day in the Holy Empire of Alasdair I Frosticus. The World Cup 2 hosts should have been celebrating their imminent one-off return to international competition for the first time since World Cup 7 - a special return to action in honour of the Silver Jubilee edition of a tournament they had, so long ago, helped in some small way to develop into the colossus it was today.

But instead, the entire nation was in mourning. Following the recent pre-world cup friendly with Ariddia [see the full story here (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=445798)], plague had broken out in the Holy Empire - after decades of total separation from ordinary reality, as ordinary reality counts the years, the citizens of the Holy Empire simply had no immunity to the charnal house of diseases that existed outside their blessed realm.

Tens of thousands were dead, and all but one member of the Silver Jubilee team that had thrashed Ariddia 6-2 in a glorious display of the virtues of Frosty Football had been wiped out by the plague. Instead of returning to the international stage with a virtually unbeatable team committed to attacking football of the highest quality, the Holy Empire would have to field a team consisting almost entirely of very beatable newcomers.

Only defender Juan Tzimisces Jr, son of legendary WC Hall of Fame member Juan Tzimisces, had survived - and it's hard to build a competitive starting XI on one player's shoulders.

Even worse, His Imperial Majesty, the Basileus of the Holy Empire, had decreed strict new quarantine laws that essentially barred the Imperial team from playing any matches at home in Alasdairopolis. Instead, all of their home qualifiers would have to be played in the Archregimancy, a nation somewhat more accustomed to contact with the nations outside the Dreamed Realm, and whose footballing monks were themselves entering the competition for the second time in a row.

This was not how the HEFA had seen their return to international football unfolding. But there was nothing for it. A team of untested juniors it would have to be. If they won anything, so much the better. If not, then at least the citizens of the Holy Empire could support the Archregimancy - the footballing monks at least stood some slight chance of qualification. A far better chance than the Holy Empire now did, anyway....

And back in the Holy Empire itself, the dreaming monks struggled to bring the plague under control. Eventually, they succeeded. But as far as football was concerned, they regrettably succeeded too late.

And so, here we are again. It hardly seems like four years since Hurfordia made their debut in the World Cup, qualifying against all the odds, before crashing out with something of a whimper. It's certainly been an interesting few years.

Domestically, Hurfordian football has gone from strength to strength. there has been controversy; the resignation of national team manager Conor O'Reilly under a cloud; the controversy surrounding the moving of Ivybridge Town to Salamis; the match-fixing controversy involving a number of top players in the Second Division.

There have been positives; the emergence of Ravenna and Callington Town as major players in the top division; the resurgence of Hellas Academy Old Boys as a club; crowds being at record highs.

Whatever else may have happened in the intervening time, the national team can now look forward to the new World Cup campaign with enthusiasm. There is no Baptism of Fire this time, of course, but the national team can take heart from their run all those years ago. Maybe this time they can really make an impact.

Douglas Freech knighted by Parliament vote

World Cup 24-winning manager Douglas Freech has been awarded an honorary knighthood for services to sport, becoming only the third person - after World Cup 8 winners Sir Jim White and Sir Paul Dussis - to be conveyed the honour.

Liverpool England does not have a monarch, and thus all "knighthoods" are honorary and conveyed by a Parliament vote. However, to get one is still rare - aside from the three, only six others have been awarded knighthoods, four for hospitality services and two for political services.

The images of the World Cup 24 final still fresh in their minds, the whole team watched on as their manager was conveyed the highest honour one could get in the nation for contributions to national sport. Thomas Lunson, who scored in the final, noted to the press before the knighthood that it was "going to be the most awesome thing I'll see in a long, long time."

Lunson has been named in the squad for the World Cup 25 qualifiers. Freech's contract runs through World Cup 26 qualifying, and he has dismissed rumours that surfaced before the WC24 semi-finals that he would leave to take up the open managerial post at the Bedistani Football Association.

The Daily Druid

DREW DEAD
Druida's President passes away aged 59

The death of Druidan President Andrew Idder was confirmed last night after 72 hours in intensive care. It follows a syringe attack outside the Presidential Office by members of the Free Alcoholic Army, from which he was given severe alcohol poisoning.

Medics tried hard to get as much of the alcohol out of his blood as possibe, but only succeeded in causing Idder to lose blood heavily. The official reasoning given for his death was a lack of blood to the brain.

In the hours following the much loved Idder's death, politicians from all backgrounds were quick to condemn the attack. Trevor Turner, leader of the Bring Back NEWI Party, declared the attack as "a blight upon democracy," while Rodger Lee said it "should sicken everyone that such a peace loving person can leave us like this."

Details of the funeral, and the long term future of Druida's Presidency, will be confirmed in the near future.

The latest Druidan football news will be with you as soon as our period of national mourning ends.

Owens just one of new looks for Stars

WOODSTOCK (ASP) -- Barry Owens paced the sidelines at the first training session for the new look Sarzonian national football team looking for all the world like a neophyte head coach. Never mind the fact that he led the Legalese Black and Red into the World Cup XXII finals in his only season as that team's head coach before the nation fell into disarray. Owens says his challenge with the Stars is much more acute.

"I'm stepping out of the proverbial frying pan into the fire," Owens said. "You're talking about filling some enormous shoes here."

Owens takes over for longtime Sarzonian national team coach Dave Wilson, who abruptly called off his plans to retire after World Cup XXIV and applied for -- and got -- the Hypocria job. With recent national team lieutenant Cal Trottier in tow, Wilson took two thirds of the coaching staff with him, leaving Owens to select his own assistant coach.

Owens responded by hiring former Under 21 national team boss Cal Trottier as the team's head coach and contacted former Bedistan national teach coach Mike Davidson about the position. Owens said he wasn't worried about either Trottier or Davidson looking over his shoulder, saying "my ego isn't an issue here. I want experience next to me on the bench.

"The Black and Red advanced to the Finals only because Legalese was named a World Cup host at the last minute," Owens noted. "We wouldn't have qualified otherwise." The Red and Black lost its Finals debut 3-0 to Sarzonia en route to the Stars' world championship.

"That was surreal," Owens said of facing the team that employed him as its top assistant since World Cup XVIII. "It's even more surreal now that I'm back here as the head man. You sometimes get spoiled and think that Dave's going to be here forever."

Owens said he had to get used to his new role as the head coach, habitually leaving the seat on the far right of the player's bench vacant until just last week. He said forward Brian Wilson, the older son of the former head coach and the former team captain, "lectured the hell out of me," and "told me to start treating this as my team rather than Dave's."

The wake-up call seemed to have worked. The Stars roster bears little resemblance to the unit that dominated the past three World Cups in spite of its 49-7-3 won-draw-loss record in three World Cups. Owens said the team was "getting a little long in the tooth," and has infused youth into a Stars team that was known for its veterans. Only five starters from World Cup XXIV remain in the starting 11, while reserve midfielder Dix Porter earned a spot as a starter for the first time.

However, the Stars have become known for their play in front of goalkeeper Horace Sandt and Owens said that won't change.

"He's conceded one goal in each of the last the World Cup qualifying stages," Owens said. "That's three goals in 38 matches. As long as Sandt keeps playing well, there's no way I'm pulling him." However, Sandt said this might be his final World Cup as the team's keeper.

"It's something I'm going to assess when the World Cup's over," he said. "But there's going to be a point when I'm going to have to step aside for someone else. I can't keep playing forever. But as long as I feel strong, I'm going to give it a go."

The Newspaper Tada!

Collonie hopes to beat Milchama in WC qualification

The Colony of Collonie has been waiting for this oppurtunity for a long time. 3 years ago they finally got the opportunity when their masters Milchama allowed them to participate for the first time in the World Cup. The Flying Eagles as their called are looking for a better start then their masters at their inaugural world cup. At first an independent and loving nation, Collonie was soon taken over and turned into a dictatorship by their neighbors Milchama. The Milchamians forced the Collonians to join the U.N. and placed a sometimes psychotic sometimes corrupt dictator to suppress the Collonians.

Thruout all this time Collonie has never given up hope at being than Milchama at at least one thing. First it was academics, then debate, and now sports. Collonie now hopes to finish better than Milchama in their first World Cup, World Cup 23. This is what Milchama did at WC23, 8 pts. 1 win, 5 draws, 8 losses, 4 goals for 24 goals against. If the Flying Eagles can at least beat that then there will be a national holiday. But Collonie can take solice with this one thing, they have competed in the Baptism of Fire Cup and Milchama has not.

Wash announces intent to retire after World Cup 25

Vanguard, Fmjphoenix: In their first press conference since the preperations for World Cup 25 have started, Coach James Wash announced a shocker. He is calling this one his last. Here was his statement.

"I have had a great pleasure in leading this team for the past 28 years, but I don't think I have it in me much more. I love football and I love each player on the Vikings. This has always been my greatest accomplishment. But with my age, I don't think I can keep going anymore. This will be the last World Cup I will coach. It has been a lot of fun, and I would not give it up for anything in the world. I just hope to make it a great one for our guys out there on the pitch and the millions in the nations and across the world rooting for us."

Although he is going to be coaching for World Cup 25, Wash also would like to find out if the FAF has anyone as a posibility to replace him. So the FAF has put out an official posting for looking for a new national coach. So far it is known that one local coach is being looked at for the position, Lorenzo Wright, coach of Waterloo United. So anyone who is interested in the coaching job at Fmjphoenix should send the resume to the FAF (ie telegram), with all their credentials and their best wins.

Jean Soqueure resigns from his president post...

Marshalliston, CA(ONN) That's what he declared today, in a press conference. His alcoholism was a part of the decision. For the first time in about 3 years, he was not drunk at all. He explained that the beer-flavoured water he was receiving had 7% of alcohol in it, something we find only in beers. He also designed a successor at his job: The counselor Guy Varennes. He will now occupy the role of president of the Oliverrian Soccer Association, a very important job.

Ariddians prepare for come-back

It’s been over half a century since the nation that founded the World Cup took part in its own creation. Now, at last, Ariddia is returning to the international stage. Ready? Or not?

The enthusiastic, inexperienced young team have played two games already to gather some much-needed practice in preparation for the big event. Those matches provided mixed results, as a home 2-6 thrashing at the hands of Alasdair I Frosticus dampened the confidence no doubt generated by a comfortable 6-3 away victory over Tanah Burung.

Sadly, tragedy struck as contact with the Ariddians unleashed a lethal plague throughout Alasdair I Frosticus, and the festive mood in Ariddia was cut short. It is said the Ariddians will be wearing a black armband for their opening match, in sign of mourning. In their first match to be held at home, a minute of silence will be observed at the start of the game.

Asked whether Ariddia was ready to face the world again after such a long absence, team captain Ue Alt had this to say:

“There was a time when foreign teams literally dreaded being drawn against Ariddia. Now, we’ll be seen as an easy opponent by all the strong, experienced teams out there. True, we’re no longer a footballing giant. We’ll be starting from nothing. But we’ve got skill, and determination, and we really want to make an impact. For now, we’re going to throw everything we’ve got into actually qualifying. After that. . . we’ll see.”

PRAYING2GOD SOCCER ASSOCIATION BELIEVED TO BE WORKING ON CUP OF HARMONY BID

According to information obtained from an anonymous source within the Praying2God Soccer Association, they are working on a solo bid for the upcoming CoH that will take place at about the same time as the WC XXV finals. The source told me, "Let's be realistic, we're probably not going to qualify, so we're in the beginning stages of planning a bid to run the CoH by ourselves." Will the Warriors shock their own soccer association, as well as the international soccer community by qualifying for WC XXV? Only time will tell.


OOC: I'm in the process of developing a scorinator that is a mix between the modern-type style and an older-type style (quite appropriate for the silver anniversary of the WC, isn't it ;) ). I still have some kinks to work out yet, but hopefully I'll have those worked out by the end of qualifying...in time to make a bid for the CoH.

WorldSport On
Casari4sport

Back again for another round
Casari back again to be pointless sideshow to World Cup Action

Back for their second year of competition, Casari has thrown it's hat into the ring after an entertaining first cycle through the various World Cup Activities.

"We did well. So now we cannot settle for less." General Manager/Coach Vivica Hill announced at the campaign-opening press conference. "Our one and only goal this year is qualification."

In it's first World Cup, a quarterfinal loss in the Baptism of Fire Cup lead up to Qualification, where Casari was edged on Goal Difference by Kipto-Mare on the final matchday. After that, Casari managed to hit their stride in the Cup of Harmony, jumping up to win their group on the Final Matchday and beat Kaze Progressa just to lose to Hockey Canada in the final.

"Last year was a year of success and falling just a little short consistantly." She continued. "Last time our squad was quite young, and that allowed us to bring back 16 of 20 members, including the front row or Ronalo, Saienz, and Newberry. Also, Rooney is back for another round in goal."

"We can't say much yet, but any way you look at it we're much better off this sysle than last to begin with."

Tyrellia National Stadium Renamed Casari National Thursday
Former Tyrellia City home expanded, refurbished for international competition

Last Tuesday, the few remaining Tyrellia City personel vacated the former Tyrellia National Stadium, moving to the newly constructed Four Towers Field, built on the old grounds of Fort Tyrell.

The field they left behind was then renamed Casari National Field on Thursday, which for 5 months has been undergoing expansion and refurbishment to make it a suitable location for the National Team.

The stadium, which previously had a capacity of 69,600 and 34,000 seats, was expanded to hold and incredable 104,700 with over 50,000 seats. "When first proposed, people said it couldn't be done without destroying the facility, but the result is very true to the original design." Critic Wilson Edmond said. The stadium's marble and granite fasade was redone and expanded to cover the new construction, leaving the classic look intact. Facilities were also improved, with new plumbing and increased numbers of restrooms.

The facility was designed to hold all Casaran league and major cup championship matches, along with being the home for all national team home games.

"And you thought it was loud before. It echos like mad now."

Emeri Breweries looking to become official World Cup Beer Sponsor
Looking to expand into foriegn markets and raise profile

David Emeri the Fifth, CEO of Emeri Breweries Ltd, announced a major offer to become offical Beer Sponsor of the World Cup.

"We see this as a major way to lead our expansion into foriegn markets and raise the profile of our company."

Other News

Revolution Square/National Home and Business Hooliganism Insurance offer extended to hosts of all Casaran Matches
Over 500 Million Selaris offered to cover any damage caused by Casaran Fans

Government pleads to lower drunkenness and rioting during World Cup Campaign
Streaking also seen as up-and-coming threat

The Bowels of Hell

Satan leered. The plague had reaped millions of souls from Aladair I Frosticus, and he was just warming up. He dearly hoped that some of the Orthodox would be forced to visit his realm during qualifiers.

He called his secretary, and told her to cancel all his appointments. When she told him he had none, he told her to make some and then cancel them. All Hell was about to be unleashed on the visitor's stands during the World Cup - quite literally.

"Waddya mean, Jake, it ain't football? Dat's what da message said: 'Wohld Cuppa Football.' Simple Englich, ain't it?"

"Butch, youse a idyit! It's what da resta da wohld calls 'football.' Ain'tcha got wit' da innernational mindset yet?"

"Yeah, I got wit' da.... Ah hell---ya mean it's 'foosball'? Like in SOCCER??"

"Now ya got it. Yeah, you signed up da whole Empiya ta play soccer."

"Awwhhh..." Pause. "I'm in it ta the neck, ain't I?"

"Dat's da trute. Any furder bright ideas, idyit?"

"Uh,... Um,... Well, no, I guess.... Waidaminid! Innernational! Dis is a innernational city, ain't it?"

"Yeah, but..."

"Wit' lotsa etnics, and foreigners, and like dat, right?"

"Yeah, but..."

"An' soccer is big aroun' da world, ain't it?"

"Yeah, but..."

"So, dere's gotta be a lotta etnics dat play soccer, right?"

"Yeah, but..."

"So, we just grab 'em and get dem ta play da Wohld Cup. Prolem solved!"

"Yeah, but..." Jake pauses. "Um..." Long pause. "Hey, dat'd work! Yeah, we hire on a buncha etnics, and Da Philelfya Empiya's got a soccer team. Hell, you do got a idea dere, Butch."

"An', we look good ta da whole innernational community, 'cause we're givin' etnics a chance to shine. Good PR, ya see."

"Dat's true. OK, Butch, dere ain't much time, so get ta work."

"Huh?"

"Yer idea, yer job. Upta you ta find da etnics an' foreigners, find a coach, and get da team togedder."

Butch thinks over what alla da work dat mean. "Jake, sometimes yer a bastid."

"Yeah, but den, I'm da boss, Butch."

So dere's poor ol' Butch, on da phone an' walkin' da streets fer days. Lucky fer him, he found da people he needed.

"OK, Butch, ya say ya got a team togedder?"

"Yeah, boss. Took some work, but I did da job."

"Dat's good. So, dey gonna be any good?"

"So-so, boss. Dere pretty good innavidually, but dey're havin' some prolems comin'
togedder as a team."

"Why's dat?"

"Dey don't all speak Englich too good. Oh, dey all speak enuf to get by, but, well..."

Jake sighs. "Dere etnics. Can't espect too much. At least dey all speak Englich." He
pauses. "Dey all do speak Englich, right?"

"Sure t'ing. Dey're all grads of at least secon' year ESL. Esept da five of dem
dat's native-borned Philelfyans."

"Wha'? Dere are Philelfyans dat play soccer?"

"Yeah, boss. 'Course, dey all got etnic families an' backrouns and dat."

"Oh, I see. So da coach can talk ta alla da team?"

"Yeah, but sometimes communicatin' is a bit, well, fraught. But everthin'
necessary is getting t'rough, and dere all gettin' bedder at Englich. Da coach figgers
it'll be OK by da time dey play."

"Let me be blunt here. We gonna win any games?"

"Sure. Coach says we're bound ta win one. Might even win a couple-few."

Jake sighs.

"Hey, don't worry boss. We ain't gonna be barn-burners, but we ain't gonna be a
embarrassment ta da Empiya."

"Dat'll havta do. OK, so what's da lineup look like?"

"Roste' boss. Dey call it a roste' in soccer. An' here it is."

So sayin', Butch puts a piece of paper in fronta Jake, dat says----


Da Philelfya Empiya presents:
DA PHILELFYA HELLCATS
01) Kleist, "Rick": starting goalkeeper
05) Froebel, "Mark": starting back
07) Guizot, "Trent": starting back
11) Schleiermacher, Curtis: starting back
14) Gneisenau, "Brad": starting back
19) Ghirlandajo, "Kurt": starting back
04) Manzoni, "Ross": starting midfield
16) Vannucci, Ryan: starting midfield
08) de Iturbide, "Scott": starting midfield
13) da Montrefeltro, "Craig": starting forward
18) Mantegna, "Bill": starting forward
03) Ricardo, "Jim": reserve goalkeeper
09) Schelling, "Tad": reserve goalkeeper
10 Krylov, "Buck": reserve back
17) di Cosimo, "Rex": reserve back
02) Fichte, Eric: reserve back
15) de la Pagerie, "Jack": reserve midfield
06) Guizot, "Clint": reserve forward
12) Cherubini, "Drake": reserve forward
Cabral, "Jeff": Head Coach
Hamerken, Keith: Assistant Coach
della Rovere, "Jake": Subassistant Coach


Style=-1
Formation: 5-3-2


"Dat's what dey call a five-three-two fo'mation."

Jake looks it over. "What's wit' da name inna quotes?"

"Mosta dese guys got weird soundin' first names, so we gave dem good Philelfyan
names as nicknames. Dat way, da fans'll have somet'in' ta call dem by."

"Good t'inkin', Butch. But why'd some got dere names wit'out quotes?"

"'Cause-a dose are dere real names."

"Gotcha. So, da team is practicin', da coach ain't wit'out hope, and evert'ings
ready?"

"Yeah, boss, all systems is go."

"Beddah be. Yer ass is onna line, Butch."

Quiet-like, Butch starts ta sweat.




My opponent, if they RP first, may do the following:
Choose my goalscorers Y
Godmod Scoring Events N
RP injuries to my players Y---but not'in' permanent-like
Godmod injuries to my players N
Hand out Yellow cards to my players Y
Hand out Red cards to my players Y
Godmod Other Events N

Time: 881.072 RMJSC (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/RMJSC)

The one and only stadium in The Solar Association which is usable by and fit for persons acclimated to "standard gravity" is The Whirl, located within Ceres. By placing the entirety of, the complete and whole stadium in a "pod" at the end of an "arm" that is spun up, sufficient centrifugal effect is caused, enough to be perceived as "one gee". Thus, gravity is imitated, replaced, for the convenience of potential opponents.

The sole and only problem, the one "down side," is the pod itself has room, has seating, for only 8,000 persons. However, in alleviation, there is a "full sense" room for fans, sufficient to seat 30,000. This, combined with further such venues for another 15,000 total, should suffice. As well, there are sight/video only venues that will accommodate and seat around, approximately, one hundred of thousands.

Please note that all persons entering Ceres will have all weapons, including but not limited to, any device easily used as a weapon, removed, confiscated, and taken from them, to be returned upon that person's departure. The said return is contingent upon, and depends on, that person acting within the law throughout their stay.

Note as well, that any damage to any structure, edifice, or object by any visitor will be treated in all respects, in law, as would the self-same damage and action if performed by a citizen of Ceres. Id est, arrest and trial; if the same is found guilty, to work off the debt, the cost of repair and/or replacement, at minimum wage, at whatsomever task, job, work the damaged party sees fit. Without, be is specially noted, any part of said debt, said cost, being payable by the offender in cash, favor, or emollient.

The Solar Association, and its constituent bodies, believes that every person is responsible for their acts and deeds, and should make full restitution for all damages they cause. In the event that a person is found "not responsible" for their actions, they are either permanently incarcerated and put to such work as they are capable of, or destroyed as useless and a menace to others. The laws regarding such a decision, such a designation as "not responsible," are administered with scrupulous justice. And, are always applied to anyone within The Solar Association, regardless of origin.

Consider this a warning; if you come to The Solar Association, you Will be subject to our laws.

The Aeropag Tribune—Even we can draw better than those laughable World Cup hosts!

Sports: CHEAT begins construction on monumental stadium
소코지토 도시, 소코 (SOKOJITO DOSI, SK)—After years of research and careful planning, the Commerce Heights Engineering and Technology (CHEAT) Alliance broke ground today on the Sokojito Überdome (소코지토 우버돔), which CHEAT claims is the largest “non-godmodded” stadium ever built. With an incredible 400 552 seats, the stadium requires an entire transportation network to be built just to get people in and out. Once the network, including underground mass transit to Commerce Heights and 유포 (Yu-po), is in place, the stadium itself will be built, scheduled for completion sometime during World Cup 26 qualifying. Since the traditional stadium design of using stairs to get people to their seats had to be abandoned to accomodate the high capacity, temporary ramps fold out from the walls before the game. This design does have some drawbacks, but “we don’t think our customers will mind the slight inconvenience,” said Max Radbruch, one of the coordinators for the Überdome project. CHEAT has not yet released any images of the stadium design, but are expected to do so soon.

Cuation

Football favour was spreading in the streets and people where celebrating, joking, debating, a happy time of unity, a rare moment under the hard rule of Jude, Warlord of Cuation. For once, parties where being held all over the land and the footballers becoming near Gods.

Those in the know about politcal affairs however where worried. If the team did well, Jude's standing would be enough to see off rivals for awhile but if they failed, Jared would seek to take the throne, using the World Cup as an escuse. The Baptisim of Fire would give an indicator which side to support but the squad was threadbare and an injury would disrupt things. Rumors abounded among the court that Jared had withheld some players in the hope of failure.

None of the players or staff have spoken to the media yet

Rejistanian internet users DDoS Aeropag Tribune

The SI user groups of Rejistania accessed the pages of the Aeropag Tribune via scripts automatically over and over again. Since most of the users use 14.4 or slower connections, the only strain on the servers was the flow control. Campaign organisator Syku Kansu said: "The weird amount of special characters in their articles makes our browsers crash regularily. Despite that the latest news sections of news pages in KP and Audioslavia link to them! I am sick of having my browser crash anytime, I want to check soccer news!"

The Aeropag Tribune did not comment and we doubt they realized the attack.

Jeruselem Government News

It's back!

What event makes the people of Jeruselem pray alot? The end of the world? Nope, the World Cup. Jeruselem have been in it since World Cup 11 and now has entered edition 25. Since World Cup 17, we've made the group stage most of the time but get dumped before we can get into the 2nd round. World Cup 24, we ran into Sarzonia in the 2nd round and they ended up being the runners up.

JGN as usual have all World Cup coverage for those who can't get enough of the round ball game. Special coverage of the Nedalian Lions team will be available for those fans in the Nedalia who watch JGN for World Cup news. The Lions made it into group stage but failed to win a game in that stage. That's no shame at all, we took much longer to just make it into the Group Stage.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/SCBNewsUpdate.jpg

"Welcome back to SCB:News," says a simply gorgeous brunette, staring straight out of the screen at you and seemingly into your soul, "I'm Saianne DeJardon."

"And I'm Javi Hierro." The man's voice booms out of the speakers like God's from a burning bush. "This is the Ten O'Clock News. The headlines tonight:"

A patriotic, fervent and inspiring jingle - for which the creator was rewarded with a lot of money - plays as some equally-fancy graphics slide and swish across the screen, quickly replaced with recently-shot footage.

"Starblaydia legend Simeone Di Bradini elected World Cup Committee President." Saianne's voice is quickly followed by Javi's as the footage changes.

"And, Nikola Lazerevski announces the Starblaydi squad for World Cup Twenty-Five."

Once more we come back to see the most-popular pair of presenters in Starblaydi television history. Thankfully for the men and lesbians in the viewing audience, Saianne begins speaking.

"Simeone Di Bradini, Starblaydia's legendary football player, has been voted in as the President of the World Cup Committee, Nationstates' governing body for the sport. Di Bradini, who won ten out of the possible thirty-three votes, beat his nearest rival, Sani Luvo of Kaze Progressa, by five votes. Trevor Belmore of Druida received one vote, while Rejistanian Kansu Kiru failed to win a vote.

"The new WCC-Supremo is currently leading Starblaydia's line in the first International Fustal Soccer Tournament, where Starblaydia have won their first two games. SCB:News caught up with Di Bradini at the inaugural 'Golden Cup', held in the Second Empire of the Golden Throne."


"Of course I'm honoured and delighted to have been voted into this position, especially as it's a Presidency voted for by my peers, the other World Cup Committee members.

"I'll be in this job for the next twelve years, so this Golden Cup will be my last competitive tournament for Starblaydia in any sport. I've bagged a fair few goals in our two wins already here so I'm obviously pleased. As soon as this tournament finishes - hopefully with me lifting the trophy - I'm going to get straight down to business.

"Sani [Luvo] will, of course, make an excellent Vice-President, and I'm sure his more-technical knowledge will aid me immensely. I want to take this oppurtunity to say a big 'thankyou' to everyone who nominated and voted for me - it's really appreciated."

"Now to another Starblaydi goalscoring legend," Javi continues the show, "Starblaydia national football team Manager Nikola Lazerevski has announced his World Cup Twenty-Five squad, who will attempt to qualify for the Cup in Kaze Progressa and Audioslavia. The squad, who are expected to be ranked around tenth in the world when the latest KPB rankings are issued, contains a few surprises, especialy as it was the first to be released - first out of one-hundred qualifying nations. 'Lazer' has obviously had his team in mind for a while. The Full 23-person squad is as follows:

"Goalkeepers: Prokopsis, Corominas, Mathias.

"Defenders: Gre, Hernandez, Vidal, Oberlander, Garahildim, Leopoldo Lopez and Zeilinski.

"Midfielders: Cuevo, Garcia, Menecrates, Buathiang, Ernesto, Itechton Matranga, Giovanni Lopez, Nguyen and Reynaldo.

"Finally the Strikers: Tumunzahar, Raphaelo, Mercutio and Vega. It has been confirmed that the squad's Captain will once again be Nunzio Gre. Full team details of the squad can be found on our website, scbsports.com (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9743511&postcount=2)."

World Cup News


World Cup Winner Arrives


The long awaited and much vaunted arrival of Dave Wilson to the Hypocria helm has finally happened. After taking a couple of weeks off after Sarzonia’s Final defeat to Liverpool England Wilson has taken official control of Hypocria’s national side and is already making preparations ahead of the upcoming World Cup 25 qualifying campaign. Wilson takes over from caretaker coaches Michael De Winter and Gregory Vidal who had been in temporary charge since Guylain N’Dumbu-Nsungu’s sacking during the last qualifying campaign. The new coach is joined by Chris Trautwig, Sarzonia’s former AOCAF coach and Wilson’s former assistant with the first team, as one of his assistants while Gregory Vidal will stay on as his second assistant coach.

Although the appointment of another foreign coach was originally met with considerable scepticism amongst the fans when the HFA confirmed the successful applicant was Dave Wilson that scepticism quickly vanished, and it‘s easy to see why. Wilson was the man that led Sarzonia right to the top of the rankings after lifting World Cup 22 and consolidated top spot with a third place finish at World Cup 23 and second place at World Cup 24. In his 143 games in charge of the Stars his side recorded a staggering 94 wins. Hyppos fans will be hoping that the 63 year old, in his eighth qualifying campaign as a coach and his tenth in total, can enjoy even a fraction of that success as Hypocria coach.


World Cup Venues Announced


Nine years ago the 80,000 capacity Hyppodrome was constructed in Hypocrium as part of the preparations for Hypocria’s first entry into international competitions. It was built to provide the Hyppos with a home and to create a football fortress in which the opposition would fear to tread. It hasn’t quite worked as planned. Twelve qualification matches have been played on the hallowed turf of the Hyppodrome but fans have only witnessed their team win twice. But during the World Cup 23 campaign two games were played outside the capital resulting in 3 - 0 and 5 - 0 wins in Pylos and Drissa respectively.

For the upcoming campaign HFA chief Alex Scott has announced that once again qualifying games will be allocated to venues outside the capital. Although the Hyppodrome will still host the majority of matches as, in Scott’s own words, “it cost a bloody fortune”. It is almost certain that the 50,000 capacity Oceanside Stadium in Pylos and the 48,000 seater Drissa Sports Arena will both host games as they did 8 years ago.

“At the moment it looks like we will be playing nine fixtures at home”, Scott told reporters in a press conference. “If that is ultimately the case our intention is to host four of the games in the Hyppodrome, two in Pylos and two in Drissa. A final venue will announced at a later date.”

The newly constructed Reef Stadium in Coral City on Hypocria’s western island colony is believed to be the HFA’s preferred choice. Although, with a capacity of 40,000, it isn’t the biggest venue available the association are keen to spread their influence onto the islands.


Friendly Match Announced


As part of the sides Pre-World Cup preparations the HFA have announced a friendly match against World Cup runners up Sarzonia.

“It seems fitting that Dave Wilson‘s first game in charge should be against Sarzonia”, HFA chief Alex Scott said. “And playing against the top ranked side in the world is as good a test as our players can get.”

Tickets for the match, to be played in Hypocrium’s Hyppodrome, are already selling fast.

Stars prepare for friendly road to Cup

With the announcement by Hypocrian Football Association chief Alex Scott that Sarzonia would play Hypocria in a pre-World Cup friendly, interest in the match soon took over the lead story status throughout Sarzonia's sporting publications and television programmes. More than just a routine friendly against a fellow Atlantian Oceania side, the match pits new Stars Coach Barry Owens and a lineup with six new starters and the greatest turnover in Sarzonian football history against their former field boss, Dave Wilson, now coaching at Hypocria.

Owens dismissed talk that the match would be a big one for the team, pointing out, "it's only a friendly. It's not going to count for anything." He added that he faced Dave Wilson before, in the first match of the World Cup XXII groups stage when he was managing Legalese against Sarzonia.

However, assistant coach Cal Trottier immediately disagreed with his boss.

"It's huge," he said. "This time, it's Sarzonia's current team and coach facing their former coach. It's going to be an emotional day for us and for Dave. It's going to be especially strange for Brian and Kevin since they're going to be playing against their dad."

"We've played Hypocria before," Brian Wilson said. "And we're familiar with the kind of game Dad likes to play. That should work in our favour." Brian Wilson admitted to being "just a little extra nervous" about the match against Dave Wilson.

"How can you not be," he asked. "He's been our coach for years and it's the first time I've ever played against my dad. I'm going to be bringing a lot of Kleenex," he joked.

"It's going to be more than 'just another match'," Kevin Wilson said. "There's no denying that. But the sooner we get through the hype, the better off we'll be, especially if we end up facing the Hyppos in a match that counts. We'll be able to get the monkey off our backs with this one."

Sarzonia's allottment of tickets to the match has already been snapped up according to ticket brokers in Woodstock. Instead of the customary five press credentials for pre-Cup friendlies, the Incorporated Football Federation announced that they've received 24 requests for media credentials for the match in Hypocria City.

"We're going to run out of credentials at this rate," IFF Chairman Terry Mangione said. "This match is going to be on primetime T.V. It's easily the biggest match we'll ever play that isn't during a World Cup."

Stars face new, old in derby

For Sarzonia's national football team, the post-Dave Wilson era began with their longtime manager providing the opposition with his new side from Hypocria in a friendly preceding the Jeremy Jaffacake Jubilee tournament and World Cup XXV. Both Brian and Kevin Wilson scored goals against their father's new side en route to a 2:1 away win but goalkeeper Horace Sandt mishandled a Hyppos shot for an own goal in Bryan Marshall Stadium to result in a split of the two match fixtures. However, the Stars claim the so-called Dave Wilson Cup on away goals.

"It was a great way to start things off," Coach Barry Owens said. "I'm relieved we got through these two matches. It wasn't easy to face Dave again." Owens faced his former boss Dave Wilson when he was coaching the Legalese national team in the World Cup XXII finals, but Dave Wilson was coaching the Stars at the time. The Hypocria City leg marked the first-ever match for Dave Wilson against his former team.

"It was definitely emotional," Dave Wilson said. "You get a lot of emotions facing a team you've put your heart and soul into all these years. I had a few nerves going into the Hyppodome, but it was nothing like going into Bryan Marshall Stadium in Woodstock to face the fans there."

When Dave Wilson was announced in front of the overflow crowd of 61,280 in Bryan Marshall Stadium, the crowd stood up and gave a thunderous standing ovation to their former field boss, saluting the man who guided the Stars to 94 victories and two championships under his watch. The supporters also
gave a standing ovation to the Hyppos, cementing their newfound status as Sarzonia's second favourite side.

The former Sarzonia manager was so popular, in fact, that midfielder Jenna Raven asked Owens if it was all right that she applaud him. "I'm applauding him," he said. So did the entire Stars team. When the final whistle sounded, the coaches met at the centre circle and embraced for a full minute, a remarkable feat in a country where a handshake is considered a public display of affection. The crowd applauded the two coaches sharing the hug, however.

"How can you not," one fan asked. "Dave Wilson is the reason we're the best team in football." Even on a night when the Stars lost, Dave Wilson's legacy would not be forgotten by Stars fans for a long time to come.

Ardous Road Ahead

With news that the Imperials, a long standing national team with no international status, are moving first to the Baptism of Fire and then to the XXV World Cup, the administration has pushed the team to its limit to make sure that it leaves a valuable impression behind it, even if it doesn't end up as close to the finals as was originally planned. Nonetheless, it has been deemed extremely important for the nation that the Imperials do make it far, and perhaps even win, the Baptism of Fire, and then possibly make it to the finals in the XXV World Cup. Indeed, the football national team, one of the only funded sports institutions within the Empire, risks loosing its funding if it does horrible in either tournament.

Because of this, the team has been training heavily through out the past year, and now finalizing that training before the Baptism of Fire, ensuring that it's fully prepared for the international realm of football. Indeed, hundreds of nationals that have gone on vacation to witness the Baptism of Fire tournament have flocked to the training fields alloted to the Imperials to watch their favourite team do their best. As one vibrant audience member said,
", these guys are some of the best new guys I've seen, and I've gone to a lot of the trainings of other teams and I haven't seen any of them work as hard as my team. With what we've been watching for the Futsal tournament, these guys have a real shot at winning the Baptism of Fire cup, and giving a hell of a ride to those within the World Cup. I think that in two or three cups our team is going to become a real world player. In fact, I'm so sure, that I'll guarantee it to ya'"

After practice, when talking to player Wilhelm Großkopf [Yes, I had to choose the hardest spelling..I can't even make that character on my computer], a foward within the ranks of the Imperials, the situation wasn't put as optimistic,
"Well, all I can say is that yes we have a chance for Baptism of Fire champions, but I wouldn't set in stone. There's a bunch of very good teams out there that possibly outmatch us. As for the World Cup...well, the fact of the matters is that it's not usual for a new country to make it high in the ranking, but I think that if we show the skills we show on the futsal court, we have a chance, but again, I wouldn't set that in stone."

Nevertheless, one can see the team push itself for almost twelve hours a day on its training field in Bettia, proving that it is working towards being a contestant for both the Baptism of Fire and the World Cup. Although we couldn't set their eventual victory 'in stone', we can predict a very good gameplay by the Imperials.

In terms of fans, the Imperials have brought over three thousand willing spectators to both Bettia and Vilita, all of which have customized their car rentals with one or two Imperial flags, blazing and waving in the air as the cars make their way through the two countries, the two hosts of the Baptism of Fire. As for the World Cup, there's an expected turnout of over eight thousand citizens from the Empire, a testimony to the absolute love for the sport, and the large population regardless. This turnout, along with the audience coming from other countries, is expected to bring heavy profit to the hosts of both the Baptism of Fire and the XXV World Cup.

Within the Empire, although a bit obvious, the favourite has been set as the Imperials, however, there hasn't been an international poll ranking favourites for the World Cup. However, most think that the Empire would rank amongst the highest for the Baptism of Fire, ranking perhaps around thirtieth for the World Cup. Nonetheless, those are all predictions. It isn't prediction, though, that as said over and over again, the Imperials are destined to up a good fight.

thsd:NEWS

Silver Service

THE twenty-fifth instalment of the World Cup is set to get underway in the next few weeks, and all over Krytenia Cup fever is once again fully in effect. There has been a real buzz about the Aces since their astonishing run to the semi-finals - even amongst those who believe that the partisan home fans rather than the skills of the eleven men on the pitch were the biggest reason.

News Shorts


Krytenia will play in a silver away kit in celebration of the Silver Jubilee World Cup. The full range of JMC's brand new WCXXV kits will be released in the next few days.
Tomorrow sees the final of "Boss Idol", which wil see the replacement for Alan Munitis decided on KBS One. Dave Van Staveren and Max Sciandri are the men in the frame.
Former Krytenian manager Alan Munitis has been given the nation's highest civil order, the Freedom Of Krytenia Medal. His official title is now Alan Munitis FKM.

The Aeropag Tribune—Content-Type: text/html; charset=UTF-8

Tribune responds to Rejistanian complaints
AEROPAG, JI—As explained by a recent article in an unnamed Rejistanian news source, an unknown group of Rejistanians launched an attack on the Internet servers run by the Tribune yesterday. “We had no idea, everything was running fine!” said the system administrator, 주자현 (Ju Ja-hyeon). According to the article, the attack was in response to the recent Tribune article on the Sokojito Überdome (소코지토 우버돔), which they claim contained so-called “special characters” that caused certain archaic HTTP clients to fail. Unfortunately, they failed to define what exactly constituted a special character, or why they loaded a document which they knew was in a format incompatible with their system, so 주자현 has informed us that until more details are obtained, “let’s just pretend nothing happened.” Our research staff is attempting to obtain more information on character encodings used within the Karelan Dictatorship, but it has been unable to do so, as all attempts at connecting to Rejistanian servers have timed out.

ASMV News Network Special Bulletin

Crowds of cheering fans gathered today as the Sea Dragons departed for the BoF. This marks the dawn of a new era for the nation as it expands its sports program to compete on the international level.

"Everywhere you look there is nothing but light blue and yellow. I LOVE IT!" cried a fan near our newsroom. There has never before been such a turnout. The nation has united to support this team

Shaun Conarky and Unami Banta-N'bai took time out of their busy schedule to sign some autographs earlier today at the Vegan School for Special Needs Children. Unami had this to say - "We just glad we go to compete. All our fans very good to us. Is happiest day o me life. I have not words to say it"

Expectations are running high here for the BoF, followed by the chance to make some real noise in WC25. Good luck to our team.

This has been Adam Kane of the ASMVNN.

(OOC: this is a continuation of my first post in the BoF (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9751361&postcount=25) thread)

Giannis Berisha entered the conference room with Hughes, who pressed a button on the remote. The screen at the front of the room illuminated, showing the face of an elderly gentleman that the Ratlean National Team Manager had yet to meet.

Fortunately, Hughes made the introduction.

"Sir, this is Giannis Berisha,as you requested. Giannis, meet Benjamin Hawthorne-Princeps, the father of Prince Culenkari."

"Your majesty," Berisha said in greeting, offering a slight bow to the screen.

Ben chuckled. "Tiberius has you trained well, eh? Relax, I'm not the king, nor am I royalty. Just a guy who happens to be the father of the First Citizen, that's all. But more importantly, for the purposes of this call, I'm someone who might be able to help you with an experienced player."

Berisha looked back in shock. "And how can you do this, sir? I thought there were no Ratleans palying abroad."

"That is somewhat true," replied Princeps, "but as it turns out, not entirely. You see, right now I'm in my hometown, Binchensburg. I have not been here in years."

"Binchensburg? Are you saying that you are Starblaydi?"

"Starblaydi? in name, perhaps, just as you are in name. Though your name is a good reminder of your true roots in the former Nemya. For me, I'm 100% Legalite."

"But that doesn't mean that any old Legalese player can just like that play for me. Hell, especially not if they were coached by that Sarzonian!"

Giannis spit in disgust, before Ben's response.

"Yes, that is correct," he said. "It's not about where they were born, but rather who they were born to. How quickly can you get someone out to Spruitland?"

LGP: "You're watching DruidSport with me, Liam Gessemschmitthaagen-Po. With me, as ever, is Bill Posters, and today we have a new pundit starting on the team, World Cup Finalist Eric Tree. Eric, good to see you."

ET: "Nice to be here."

LGP: “Before we get started on Druida’s World Cup qualifying campaign, Bill, I believe you have an announcement to make?”

BP: “Indeed I do, Liam. Now, we all know of the sad death of our beloved President just over three weeks ago. We all know how much effort he put into ridding Druida of its alcohol problem through the Make Druida Sober campaign. We all remember the three Ss that he stood for - sensibility, sustainability and soberity.”

LGP: “Indeed. It was what every good Druidan should stand for.”

BP: “Indeed. Well, the Make Druida Sober campaign have been looking for someone high profile to head their election campaign this time around, and they have decided that I, Bill Posters, would be an ideal candidate.”

LGP: “You mean you’re running for the presidency?”

BP: “That is correct, Liam.”

LGP: “But you’re a football reporter?”

BP: “Your point being?”

LGP: “That you know absolutely nothing about politics. OK, what are your policies on the environment, then?”

BP: “Well, obviously, these will develop over time. The election is still six months away. All I know is that we have to keep as much of Druida’s remaining green fields intact, and the best way to do that is to stick a goal at either end of them.”

LGP: “So metal frameworks are going to destroy Druida’s countryside?”

BP: “It’s for the good of the country. What makes the people of Druida happier than anything else?”

ET: “Drink.”

BP: “Dri… no, not drink. Football! So what would be in the best interest of the Druidan people? To have as much football as is humanly possible. Now that the DruidLeague is closed down, where are our players going to come from?”

ET: “Chicanada?”

BP: “Just because they entered late for this cup, doesn’t mean that we can just go around stealing their players.”

LGP: “Druida have done that before, though. Remember when Urk and Thunk came to play for us?”

BP: “I do. But then it wasn’t really them, was it? And anyway, they had nowhere else to go.”

LGP: “Fair enough. So what do you think of the rumours that Druida will be testing a new formation in the qualifiers this time around?”

BP: “I thought we were talking politics here?”

LGP: “Well, you don’t have to say anything if you don’t want to. Y’know, you can go off and get advice on your agricultural policy if you like…”

BP: “Well, it doesn’t make itself, you know.”

LGP: “I was joking, Bill.”

BP: “Oh.”

ET: “Can I just stop you two for a minute. I know this is my first show and everything, but it might be nice for the viewers who’ve tuned in for a World Cup Qualifying preview to actually see something about the World Cup. Not just you two bickering.”

LGP: “Well I’m not the one running for president!”

ET: “Please?”

BP: “Well… he started it.”

LGP: “Did not!”

BP: “Did to!”

LGP: “Did not!”

BP: “Did to!”

LGP: “Did not!”

BP: “Oh, you soooo did!”

*While Liam and Bill continue, Eric signals off to the production staff to switch down their microphones.*

ET: “Anyway. As Liam almost got around to saying, Druida will be trying out a new formation this cup, as Elastic Edwards tries something new by packing the midfield with seven players, thus meaning that the opposition will find it hard to create chances and allowing more fluidity between positions.”

LGP: “Are we still on?”

ET: “Just about.”

LGP: “Oh, good. Well, I personally thing Edwards has gone round the bend. Seven across the middle. Still, at least it isn’t karela or takil.”

BP: “Well, Edwards has given it the name ‘System Elastic’, both after himself, its creator, and after the simplicity by which it allows the team to switch positions and styles.”

LGP: “So you’re talking football now, are you?”

BP: “Look, Liam, I’ve known you for forty years now. Why are you like this all of a sudden?”

LGP: “Like what?”

BP: “Oh, leave it out.”

LGP: “No, really. What am I being like?”

BP: “You’re just jealous nobody’s asked you to stand for president, aren’t you?”

LGP: “Of course not! It’s just that it isn’t a footballer’s job, is it?”

BP: “Come on!”

LGP: “Really. It’s a ludicrous idea!”

BP: “I’ll let you be my running mate.”

LGP: “Really… *Bill nods* …well, in that case, OK then!”

BP: “I knew I’d talk you round!”

LGP: “But they’re still paying us to talk about the football, right?”

BP: “Well, we still have to make a living until then.”

LGP: “OK then. So where were we?”

ET: “Bill was telling us about ‘System Elastic’.”

LGP: “Oh yeah. I thought all these different systems had to have Rejistanian names. So what would the Rejistanian for elastic be?”

BP: “I haven’t a clue.”

ET: “Nope.”

LGP: “Well, we’ll leave them to give it a name once they’ve seen it in action. As for personnel, Eric, who will we be seeing this time around?”

ET: “Well, one thing’s for sure, we won’t be having an unchanged roster this time around. Some of the more recognisable faces will still be there. Ricky Mallon will remain as captain as he goes into his final cup campaign, Trefor Edwards Jr. is likely to replace Elmo van der Hesselvenatchov as first choice goalkeeper, the three Jones brothers are likely to remain in midfield, and Adrian Belmore will be our lone striker. Richard Milk also looks good to start at centre back, but as for the rest of the make up of the team, I can only speculate.”

LGP: “Right, and as our political discussion took up most of the show, a quick prediction time. First, how far will the rainbows get and secondly who do you think will win the whole damn thing. Eric?”

ET: “I’ll say that anything less that the knockout stages will be a disappointment for us. As for a winner, I’ll be boring and say Sarzonia.”

LGP: “Bill?”

BP: “Well, I want to win the thing, but with our showing last time, we’re some way off reaching the final again. I’ll say that we might fluke our way to the quarters. To win, we’re going for Starblaydia, who’ve been creeping up the top ten for some time now.”

LGP: “Well, I’ll say Druida will probably be so crap in the qualifiers that we’ll win the cup. Of harmony. And that Audioslavia, with home advantage, will eventually win the World Cup… what are you two giggling at?”

*The camera cuts across to show Bill and Eric laughing as if they’d just been tickled by the largest feather in the history of the world ever.*

BP: “Audioslavia! Oh Liam, you still crack me up something rotten!”

ET: “If the slaves ever win the cup, I’ll run naked through the streets of Cornellby!”

LGP: “I’ll hold you to that! Right that’s it from us, then. We’ll see you in a few weeks, when the draw and squad for the qualifiers is announced. From Bill, Eric and myself, goodnight!”

Hyppos Left Feeling Blue


It had been coined the “Dave Wilson Trophy” by the media. Initially a friendly in Hypocrium, it became a two legged encounter after a second match in Woodstock was proposed by the Sarzonian football authorities.


Hypocria 1 - 2 Sarzonia (Hypocrium)
Deucher

It was the first time Hypocria had taken to the field with their new World Cup winning coach but even he couldn’t overcome what is fast becoming known as “the curse of the Hyppodrome”. Thirteen games have now been played at the national stadium, resulting in a measly two wins. But Sarzonia are the number one team in the world so we shouldn’t be too concerned. Not yet anyway. It was the Stars who came out on top in this friendly match and it was Wilson’s own sons who did the damage. Brian Wilson put the Stars in front in the first half and brother Kevin fired past Derevko to double the Sarzonia lead midway through the second. Substitute Ashley Deucher rounded Sandt after being put through by Baxter to halve the deficit but the Stars held on.


Hypocria 1 - 0 Sarzonia (Woodstock)
Sandt (og)

The cheer that greeted Sarzonia’s returning hero was deafening. Not bad considering he was in charge of the opposition. And not bad considering the opposition won the match. An Alex Liberda shot looked to be handing wide by Sandt dived for it anyway and only succeeded in fumbling the ball over the line. A rare error from the usually infallible Stars keeper. The final whistle went with the aggregate scores level but the Stars claiming the “Dave Wilson Trophy” on away goals. Despite the home defeat the Sarzonia fans cheered both coaches, past and present, while the Hyppos fans were left wondering how their team can beat the World’s top side away from home in a friendly but lose away to the likes of 0-0 is Evil in competitive matches.


And what about this curse? Rumours that the HFA have been in contact with various warlocks, wizards and witchdoctors about the problem have been dismissed as “silly” by Association head Alex Scott. And when asked about the gentleman dressed in feathers and holding what appeared to be a thigh bone spotted leaving his office Scott assured reporters that “that was my uncle. He's not been well.”

Cuation squad heads to Bof!

The Cuation squd left our beloved island to the cheering of thousands of fans and waved off by the Regent Goverment. The lads are excited about going to new countries and the fans will follow them with the goverments blessing to witness the matches ahead. National pride and unity has never been this high!

People are geting planes, boats, even swimming to get to Vilita, the football giant and a place said to be beuatiful. Jude has promised his team that they will be allowed to visit all the sites after training.

Somewhere deep in the Archregimancy...

"So.... Fr. Nicholas... Are we returning to the World Cup?"

"Absolutely, Fr. John. The WC24 squad's been retained, and they've even been invited to enter the pre-tournament 'Jeremy Jaffacake Jamboree' invitational warm-up"

"You joining me in the studio for the wrap-up show again?"

"I very much hope so, Fr. John."

"And what about the sad events in Alasdair I Frosticus?"

"Terrible. Terrible. Though we think Satan's getting a little ahead of himself in the Anathematic Republics. As ghastly as the Holy Empire's plague was, the Prince of Darkness only harvested tens of thousands of souls - not millions"

"Well, he is the Prince of Lies, Fr. Nicholas..."

"And what about our chances in the tournament?"

"Well, Fr. Nicholas, the draw hasn't been made yet, so we don't really know. But our squad's shot up the rankings over the last WC and CoH, so I'd expect us to stand a solid chance of an upset or two. But then, perhaps the Lord our God has different plans for us this time around. Instead of performing unexpected footballing miracles, perhaps we shall be punished for our footballing pride, and sink to ignominious defeat. Suffering's good for the soul, after all."

"I suppose we'll see, won't we?"

"I suppose we will...."

From en.hanines-kmr.jsk.rj

Rejistanian ISP blocks the Aeropag Tribune

The rejistanian ISP http://tinypic.com/eaqg6t.png JSK decided that it from now on blocks the site of the Aeropag tribune. The CEO http://tinypic.com/eaqiqo.png explains that this site appeared in IFrames of of the World Cup information sites from Kaze Progressa and Audioslavia. While this is not the problem, the productivity after every new article with untransliteratable characters sank since many SI-computers had to be rebooted and that takes time. http://tinypic.com/eaqiqo.png Stated that the ban will continuie till either theuntransliteratable characters will disappear from sites, which are IFrames to official information sites or vh and http://tinypic.com/eaqlg3.png support it, whatever happenes first.

The Aeropag Tribune (에로박 튀뷴)—Not available to image-hungry Rejistanians

Tribune blocked by Rejistanian ISP
AEROPAG, JI—After a dispute over so-called “special characters” appearing in various Tribune articles, particularly those related to 소코지토 (Sokojito), the Rejistanian ISP Konihekta JSK has blocked access to the Tribune to a number of Rejistanian customers. Central to the complaints is the apparent inadequacy of Rejistanian computer systems, unable to handle anything but the simplest 8-bit character sets. “We apologize for any inconvenience our encoding may have caused,” said our system administrator, 주자현 (Ju Ja-hyeon). “We can’t pay for the damages, as the problem is not our fault, but we can work to prevent our articles from causing any future problems.” 주자현 went on to suggest a mutually beneficial proposal for the Tribune and the Rejistanian organizations involved—in exchange for programs capable of transilterating 한글 (Hangeul) syllables, the affected Rejistanian entities would work to provide a system of encoding Rejistanian characters in the Unicode™ universal character encoding used by the Tribune. No response has yet been received from Konihekta.

JMC: WC25/26 EDITION SHIRTS RELEASED

AUDIOSLAVIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Audio07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/AudioAway07.jpg

COMMERCE HEIGHTS
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/CH07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/CHAway07.jpg

FMJPHOENIX
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/FMJ07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/FMJAway07.jpg

HURFORDIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Hurfordia07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/HurfordiaAway07.jpg

HYPOCRIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Hypocria07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/HypocriaAway07.jpg

LIMBROGIDLIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Limbrogidlia07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/LimbrogidliaAway07.jpg

MILCHAMA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Milchama07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/MilchamaAway07.jpg

NEW MONTREAL STATES
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/NMS07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/NMSAway07.jpg

OAKER
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Oaker07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/OakerAway07.jpg

SARZONIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Sarzonia07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/SarzoniaAway07.jpg

Orders being taken throughout the Cup. TG Krytenia for more details.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg

Ediraf Unveil Starblaydia Kit for World Cup 25
Sportswear Company in not-at-all-ripping-off JMC Designs fest

Ediraf (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Ediraf), Starblaydia's foremost Sportswear manufacturer, have struck a deal with the Starblaydi Football Association to provide Starblaydia's kits for the next twenty years. The contract, which runs until World Cup 30, will see Starblaydia bedecked in Ediraf gear for a whole generation.

This multi-million credit deal, in which the SFA had to decide whether to stick with Ediraf or change to Krytenian manufacturers JMC, cements a long, fruitful and patriotic partnership in which Starblaydia's entire national team will sporting the Ediraf symbol.

Home and Away Kits for World Cup 25:
http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Starblaydia/Kit1.jpghttp://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Starblaydia/Kit2.jpg

NEW PALADINS KIT SELLS OUT IN 6 HOURS

ANGIERS - Here at a Richelieu & Roy department store, only disordered hangers and loose labels remain where this morning two hundred official Paladins kits for WC25 were stacked.

"Both the home and away kits sold out faster than any other clothing I've sold," said store manager Bernard Thibault. "We thought we had enough to carry us over to the start of the tourney, but boy, were we ever wrong."

Manufacturer JMC, in Krytenia, has assured NMS stores that more jerseys will arrive "probably by Tuesday of next week," said lawyer Jean Rousseau in a statement on behalf of EE, Richelieu & Roy, and five other major chains. "These guys are bending over backwards to meet the demand, but even then there's limits."

Deep in the bowels of the Paladin Dome

"Bet you can't!"

"I can too!"

"Do it! And bring back some proof while you're at it!"

...Paladins RP-Net brings to you...

...Attack of the Killer Tomatoes...

Kyle had taken his friend's bet. He knew he could get to the old levels below the Paladin Dome. He didn't know what was lurking down there, but it couldn't be that bad. Anything vaguely scary would have died after 56 years.

He got down to the lowest level of the parking garage below the stadium. The gray, unassuming metal door looked like a custodian's closet, but he knew it was much more. He had found it by accident one day while waiting for his brother (a security guard at the Dome) to get off his shift so they could go watch some movie about riots in a place called Columbia. It was awesome, watching people going around pulling buildings down and stuff. His brother had told him that this had really happened once, a long, long time ago, back before his dad was born. He had been amazed, but everything his brother had told him so far had been true, so this must have been true as well.

He got to the bottom of the stairs, pulled out his flashlight, and shined it around. There was row upon row of shelves full of things. "At least it'll be easy finding some proof," he thought as he headed down the hall.

There were a bunch of shirts saying "I survived the Columbia riots" piled on the shelves of the first row he went down. He found two that were the right size and grabbed them - they looked pretty cool, especially with the picture of a paladin and a lion fighting on the back.

There were boxes of "Nikea Panda voodoo dolls" whatever a Nikea Panda was. There were odd looking posters featuring the same person over and over again saying "Hi! I'm Alan Belmore!" "That guy must be Alan Shearer's grandaddy or something," Kyle said out loud. He kept going down the hall. At the end he saw a bunch of cans lying around on the floor. "Evisceratomato sauce...huh...what's an Evisceratomato? And why are these cans empty?"

There was a rumbling sound from down the hall. Kyle started and screamed.

A giant red mass was oozing down the hall towards him. It was burbling "Revenge!"

Kyle got chased down the hall. He sprinted for the stairs, but the evisceratomato sauce blob was gaining on him. He barely made it to the stairs and got out. The sause followed, but seemed to be having problems climbing stairs.

Kyle got to the lot, winded, and headed for the elevator, too distraught to think about closing the door.

The sauce made it up the stairs five minutes later. A sign for the recent NMS-Kaze Progressa triggered some kind of ancestral memory, and it paused, as if to think things out further...

OOC-wow...I've been around a while, I remember the Evisceratomatoes, and their untimely demise ;) , though I forget who that demise came at the hands of. Does anybody remember that part of it? Anybody remember this one? :p

IC-

RESEARCHER CLAIMS TO HAVE FOUND PROOF OF AN EGG BEATING MULTIPLE TEAMS IN SOCCER

A Praying2God researcher, who revealed their discovery on the grounds of anonymity, has claimed that they have found in WC records that an egg beat multiple WC teams many years ago. They also found that supposedly a speck of dust beat a team as well. The researcher would not name their source, and supposedly nobody can verify the findings either, as the researcher has not yet been able to find anybody who can recall those matches happening.

ASMV 3-0 in BoF

The Sea Dragons have used their physical style on defense to improve to 3-0 in the BoF. With this experience, as well as playing in the JJJ, Head Coach D'Champaign feels really good about his team right now.

"We are very excited. I know that the level of competition will step up once WC25 kicks off, but we are faring much better in the BoF than anyone could have imagined. With matches against An Archy in the BoF and Hockey Canada in the JJJ coming up, we will find out more about our team. But right now I am on cloud 9, so dont ruin it with bad questions just yet"

Casari4sport

Casari casts suspicious look over WC competition
"We're in this thing with a bunch of loonies."

Casaran researchers are hard at work in an effort to determine, in fact, if most if not all of Casari's WC competition are insane.

"While some of the statements we hear from opponents tend to have the outward appearance of a bunch of loonies, we still have no definiative proof."

Casari appearing bland and lame next to more interesting nations
"We don't have cool freaky stuff under our stadiums."

Another common complaint among Casaran fans seems to be that put up against the colorful goings-on and history of other national teams, Casari seems thoroughly and mindlessly boring.

"We don't speak any cool languages, noone really cares about us, we don't have lucrative international kit deals, and our efforts for sponsorship probably won't go through."

New Away kit being considered
Fact that away kit is not hideously ugly enough starting to bother most people

After the odd decision to go with buttons on the kits for this effort, Casaran officals are now considering changing the away kit to something more soul-destroyingly ugly.

"All away kits are ugly. It's a common rule. That's why we change them every year. That and to make more money off the nutters that buy our away kits every year."

Compared the the white-and-blue hoops of the Casaran First kit, the second one is reletively plain, and if you ask some people, nowhere near ugly enough.

Some of the new designs being considered are ones based on the Casaran Red Tiger, complete with stripes and white belly. Petitons are already being circulated to stop this disaster from being released on the public.

Casaran Nationals looking fo international friendlys to prepare for cup
"They only give us booze money if we play!"

In a provocative move during the boring run-up to the cup, Casari Manager and Coach Vivica Hill has started issuing challenges to other nations blindly to friendly matches before the start of the cup.

"We don't care who! We just need to get on the field and shake out a few of the kinks if we're going to put up a quality run this year." She said to assembled press.

Harsher hooliganism penalties passed by Parlament
"╘100 fine raised to ╘250"

Today Parlament increased the fine for hooliganism-related-crimes from 100 to 250 selaris, a record high.

"We need to get the point across that these crimes aren't entirely acceptable anymore." Will Turner, Baron from Tyir said to reporters.

Casari4sport

Casari appearing bland and lame next to more interesting nations
"We don't have cool freaky stuff under our stadiums."

Another common complaint among Casaran fans seems to be that put up against the colorful goings-on and history of other national teams, Casari seems thoroughly and mindlessly boring.

"We don't speak any cool languages, noone really cares about us, we don't have lucrative international kit deals, and our efforts for sponsorship probably won't go through."

The Monastic Football Association and the Holy Synod of the Archregimancy would like to assure Casari that it is better to be boring than to be heretical.

"Look, for example, at Kaze Progressa" said noted Archregimancy foreign affairs expert Fr. Polybius the Assertive. "A storied international sporting history, co-hosts of the next World Cup, and yet the vast majority of their citizens are probably going to hell in a handbasket for embracing the vile heathen rite of Excelitism. Is that really what Casarians want? Better to clear the palate with the occasional drink" said Fr. Polybius, downing a shot of what might have been ouzo, vodka, or raki "than to suffer the eternal torments of hell - though this Casari hooliganism thing might cause the odd problem on the Day of Judgement"

Fr. Polybius then entered into a learned discussion of how the Orthodox Church, unlike many heretical protestant denominations, doesn't pretend to know the mystical will of God in advance, and conceded that it was possible that both excelite Progressans and drunken Casarian hooligans might conceivably achieve eternal salvation without converting "if such is the unknowable will of the Almighty". But the MFA decided not to bore the other World Cup participants with a long theological discussion, especially once Fr. Polybius started using a footballing metaphor to distinguish between the inability to know God's Essence despite the possibility of perceiving the existence of the Almighty through his Energies.

The Daily Druid

DRUIDA APPEARING BLAND AND LAME NEXT TO SOME NATIONS
By Eric Tree

Following the report in Casari4sport that Casari is "thoroughly and mindlessly boring", the interim Druidan government have rushed to assure them that they tend to disagree with this statement.

Temporary Leader Trevor Turner told us, "They can't seriously say that. I mean, look at the report, and compare Casari with Druida if you will."

"'We don't speak any cool languages.' Well, neither do we. You can hardly call Mock Welsh 'cool'. Shambolic, yes, but never cool."

"'No-one really cares about us'. That's OK, no-one really cares about us. Including ourselves."

"'We don't have lucrative international kit deals.' Neither do we anymore. They're made in Graymouth, where just about everything that's a Druidan as a pile of broken plastic is made."

"'...and our efforts for sponsorship probably won't go through.' Well, it could be worse. You could have our economy!"

"In all seriousness, though, we think Casari is quite a special place. They're famous for their drinking and their new hideous kits. I mean, whoever heard of a nation like that?"

Druida have offered to travel to Casari to play one last game in their old away kit of brown with pink polka-dots before moviong onto something more sensible.

Bill Posters is at home watching the days news on TV. There's the highlights of his day's campaigning, the rest of his challengers, then a piece about Chemindus, on which Trevor Chem speaks.

Something looked wrong. Posters knew it, just by looking at the screen. He called his running mate and co-commentator Liam Gessemschmitthaagen-Po.

BP: "Liam."

LGP: "Yeah?"

BP: "Watching the news tonight, I noticed something I've never noticed before."

LGP: "Oh yeah?"

BP: "Yeah. It's about Trevor Chem."

LGP: "And?"

BP: "Well, haven't you ever noticed anything about him?"

LGP: "Only that he's got a new pair of glasses on."

BP: "Did he?"

LGP: "Yup."

BP: "Oh. Well maybe that was it."

LGP: "Why, what were you going to say?"

BP: "Well, he's been around as long as the Druidish Lands, right?"

LGP: "Just about."

BP: "And he barely looks much older than he did sixty years ago."

LGP: "I can see what you mean."

BP: "Surely that must've struck you as odd by now?"

LGP: "Well, he is half Zucchini, so maybe that's it."

BP: "How about that that isn't it. How about he just says he's half Zucchini. Does he look at all like a Giant Zucchini to you?"

LGP: "Well..."

BP: "How green does he look?"

LGP: "Well... when you put it that way..."

BP: "We've got to get to the bottom of it."

LGP: "But when? We've got a presidential campaign to run, a World Cup to report on, and then that on top of it! You've gotta be realistic, Bill!"

BP: "It's OK. Eric Tree seems to be doing OK with most of the World Cup work so far, so that leaves us with two tasks. The election is only a couple of weeks away... then we can get our intelligence agency onto it."

LGP: "Intelligence agency?"

BP: "Yeah. When you're in power, you get to control all that kind of thing."

LGP: "Yeah, but... intelligence... in Druida?"

BP: "Yeah, OK, we might be a stupid nation, but there's no need to make a joke up about it."

LGP: "I'm not. Can't you remember the old intelligence agencies we had? The Rejistanian who refused to speak the language and Dave the child capturer."

BP: "Yeah, but they can't be that bad nowadays, can they?"

LGP: "No, they can't."

BP: "Well there you go."

LGP: "...because they closed it down."

BP: "They did what?!?!?"

LGP: "They closed it down!"

BP: "What did they do that for?"

LGP: "Because it was more trouble than it was worth. So they shut it!"

BP: "Oh."

LGP: "And anyway, this election isn't won yet! You should know that complacency gets you nowhere. Everyone who played for the Druids learned that as their first lesson!"

BP: "You're right, Liam. Let's get on with the election campaign. By the way, how did it say we were doing in that?"

LGP: "You're 23 points ahead in the polls. Looks like a landslide victory is on the cards!"

BP: "Fantastic! Still, can't rest on our laurels, eh?"

Yaforite Golden Wolves Prepare to Take 25 by Storm

THE ZYDRAKOS DOME-AJER, YAFOR 2"This year, nothing will get by the Yaforites. This cup, they will advance. This year is our year!"

So screamed over 2,000 Yaforite faithful accompanied the team to a practice session at the field where Yafor 2 will play all of their qualifiers, the massive, newly renovated, Zydrakos Dome, home to Ajer FC, this year's place where the YAforite home qualifiers will be played. It is a home stadium for many of these guys and will be.

The grass, liberally sprinkled with dew, the cool, crisp, thin, morning air heavy like a blanket, fans bundled up in coats and jackets, the players barely shivering in their shorts and doing their drills under the strn eyes of a watchful coach, the scene was one of utter idyll and peace.

This year, the YAforites look to advance to the second round. For the first time.

We will keep an eye on their practices and bring interviews with coaches in other additions.

-Excerpt from The Sporting Daily News.

Casari4sport

Outpouring of International concern described as "touching"
"And we thought we were going to hell!"

Alter the outpouring of international concern comforting the Casaran people that they might not be the most boring/hellbound team in the World Cup, National pools indicate that Casaran Self-hate has got down by ten percent.

"It's quite remarkable what a few kind words can do, especally when they're kind enough to say that we probably all aren't going to hell." Deputy Prime Minister Uri Romero said today.

GM/C Vivica Hill and Casaran Team happily accepts Druida's offer of a match
Return Leg in Druida also on the table

In a match which might feature the most mind-melting combination of color, Casari General Manager/Coach Vivica Hill happily accepted the Druidan offer of a friendly to be played in Casari and countered the offer to play a return leg in Druida.

"We think the match with Druidia would be the perfect time to reveal the new Tiger-kits, along with garnering some experience and some much needed income."

Experts are already saying that the match might become one of the largest instances of mass blindness since the one week period where licenses to manufacture alcohol were not required and the final product was not required to be tested.

Will we do better?

The question that burns on the tongues of all Tadjik fans and experts alike: will Tadjikistan step out of the shadow in which it got stuck many years ago? So far the Tadjiks have always performed well during Qualifications with one 10-0-0 record 8 years ago and they always played the group stages with some succes. But the Tadjiks have never been able to get past the 1/16th finals and some fans believe we should aim higher.

'The higher we aim, the lower our fall' Michael Frunze exclaimed, 'Tadjikistan has always been a modest nation, we never look any further than the next match. And this attitude has always ensured that we were never dissapointed when we failed to reach a certain stage. Lets face it, Tadjikistan has never been a topteam, we should be happy with our achievements in the subtop. we have to our best today and who knows, maybe tomorrow we'll break through.'

Although Frunze's word were described as wise, the call for a big victory never died. And as we saw during World Cup XXIV (coach Luchinsky got sacked) this call is becoming louder by the minute. The Sadirovs will have to reach the World Cup or they might jus get fired like their predessor, an uncommon fate for Tadjik coaches.

Tadjik Tigers not the only Tigers

That is correct, there is more than one Tigerteam in the World Cup Qualification; Next to the Tadjik Tigers there are also the Casari Tigers, a team that was unknown in Tadjikistan until some reporter printed a small article on Casari's Red Tiger and kit.

News hit Dushanbe by surprise and officials wanted to get their name as Tigers copyrighted but they came back with empty hands 'Its a very common name and everyone is allowed to use it as name for its team, Look at nations like Colombia and Belgium, both have a soccer team called 'Devils'. The Tadjik Tigers will have to accept the existence of another Tigerteam.' One Official said in response to the TNFF copyright attempt.

'It isnt that bad, they can never match us in our soccerskills ' one fan remarked and he may be right, appearantly anyone in Casari can make alcoholic beverages, which according to some experts will lead to mass blindness, 'Lets just hope their team drinks that stuff.' Another fan said, while others nodded.

The Sonoma City Herald
Volume CXIV, Issue 132 - December 17, 2083 - Just þ1!

In today's issue
Two dead in Park Falls fire - page A3
The Columbia riots, sixty years later - page B2
Dennis 6, Washington 7: Fans in tears after 18-inning loss - page C3

Section C - Sports

Still no decision on Bedistan manager
FA remains tight-lipped regarding candidates

GRACEVILLE, JA -- With World Cup 25 qualifying rapidly approaching, the Bedistan Football Association has not yet made an announcement regarding who will manage the Lions after previous manager Mike Davidson was sacked following a loss to Liverpool England in the quarterfinals of World Cup 24.

"We do have a couple of candidates in mind," said BFA president Sam Bacon when interviewed. "However, I am not at liberty to disclose who they are." Such a statement made so close to the start of qualifying has fans worried, and many are under the belief that Bacon has not in fact found any candidates for the position. "Everything will be revealed in good time," he insists.

Davidson declines Sarzonian position
Says he wants a "bigger challenge"

CARTER, PA -- Former Bedistan national football team manager Mike Davidson politely declined the Sarzonian FA's offer of an assistant managing position in a press conference today from his home in Carter. His rationale was as follows:

"When I took control of the Bedistani team during World Cup 19, it was already a well-established program that was simply in the doldrums. All the team needed was a little push in order to go all the way, and they did less than a decade later. If I were to take a position with the Sarzonian management, it would be very similar - they have the best program in the world right now and I really can't do anything to improve it. Sure, I would likely enjoy quite a bit of success if I were to take the job, but instant success isn't what I'm looking for anymore. I want to perform a bigger accomplishment, like taking a relatively unknown side and bringing it up into the elite. I'm ready for a change in scenery as far as football is concerned; I've maintained the status of elite teams, and now I want to bring a lesser team into that privileged circle."

Davidson did not name any specific nation, and indeed it is theoretically possible that he isn't thinking of a national team at all, but possibly another team in the Bedistani league system (he is currently manager of Premier League club Floral FC). Davidson has refused to clarify his statement, however.

Casari Broadcasting Alliance
Oh God Oh God Oh God

New kits even more hideous than hoped
Goal of having fully awful Away kits a success

The challenge of having the single ugliest kit in WC25 has hopefully succeeded with the revelation of the latest monstrosity dreamed up at the Casari Soccer Authority.

"We hope these disturbingly ugly kits (http://i16.photobucket.com/albums/b20/Casari/kit2.png) will inspire fear or temporary loss of sight in all who see them. The original idea of patterning them after the Tiger has been a rousing success in making kits disturbing to all the senses."

Further ideas of using a similar scheme to decorate away locker rooms are being dismissed as cruel.

UNDEAD BLOB OF MAD EVISCERATOMATO SAUCE RAMPAGES THROUGH PARKING GARAGE

Irrational hatred of all WC11 teams seems to be driving factor behind the being

NEW MONTREAL - The undead blob of evisceratomato sauce, presumably composed of sauce from sufferers of mad evisceratomato disease, that was released yesterday now "completely dominates" the lowest level of the Paladin Dome parking complex.

"It was lurking in some disused storage areas way below the Dome," said White Ranger captain Marc Perron, who was leading efforts to combat the mad beast. "It's been attacking both the Paladins logo as well as the Kaze Progressan gear we still had up from the Cup of Harmony."

The being was released by accident when a young child, apparently acting on a dare, broke into the lower levels of the building in search of old gear from WC10 and 11.

"Frankly, I can't blame the kid," said Perron. "An exciting adventure, with some cool retro gear as a reward? I'd do it, if I was in his shoes. And who, really, could plan on getting attacked by tomato sauce?"

Party!

"In Cuation itself, a nationalholiday has been declared and Jude's throne is looking increasingly secure. Emotinal scenes could be seen as the news filtrered through, some people have even proposed to random strangers. People are having fun swimming between the two islands and parties are abouned with Jude's goverment even having a private party led by Jared, Jude's brother."

"Great news for the Chancellor, Arjen Masikovic, as our proud green and yellow shirts have been snapped up, many shops running out. Jared's descion to force some companies to create flags, shirts and other Baptisim of Fire and World Cup merchendise for Cuation team looked to backfire after an early 3-1 loss. Fortunatly the team has gone on a winning streak and pride in the team is at an all time high. Money has flowed into the companies and the taxes from it has boosted an already rich goverment."

"In other news, Jude has declared that any people from the nation of Michael Stricklandtttttt shall be arrested and interrigated over the murder of their own manager Michael Stickland. If they are lucky, the scum will be exiled."

The Daily Druid

SHOCK AS ELLIS WINS ELECTION
By Trevor Connolly

Druida stunned the world yesterday by electing relative unknown Huw Ellis as their new president, upsetting runaway favourite Bill Posters in a mightily close race.

Ellis, one of the pro-alcohol brigade, will now take up office for the next four years, and threatens to take Druida back to the bad old days of the drink.

It will be a surprise for many a Druidan, who will have to get used to the temptation of the booze in everyday life, as opposed to just avoiding backwater bars.

The ones most surprised, though, will be those within the Posters camp, who have clapsed defeat from the jaws of victory. A full inquest as to what exactly went wrong was set up even before the result was made official.

The Arcadian Times
Euroslav Team Rebuilds and Renames

After participating in the World Cup multiple times before, and not faring so well, the Euroslavia Chromas, at least that's what their former name was, withdrew from the Cup in order to re-evaluate itself, in comparison to the rest of the competitive teams participating in it. It was decided by the team that the "Chromas" would no longer serve the team correctly, and that it would now be the Euroslavia Titans.

The second change occurred with a completely re-organized team. Appriximately 40% of the team was either replaced, or withdrew, from being scouted by other teams still participating in the Cup. Some remained impatient for the struggling team in Euroslavia, and couldn't wait any longer, thus leaving the nation and dedicating themselves to other teams. They would soon regret that decision as the Titans push for a strong comeback into the world scene, once again. With a new team name, as well as a whole new list of young stars, one can only hope that this team can come together and prove that all of the practice in their off-years were worth it.

http://bellsouthpwp.net/h/a/harleyt_1387/bsd_banner.png

Porter diagnosed with KJB

SOKOJIWA CITY -- Sokojiwa City FC and Bedistan national team left winger Michael Porter was diagnosed yesterday at Sokojiwa Regional Medical Center (소코지와 지역 의학 센터) with knee-joint breakdown. This is the first known case of KJB in Bedistan in addition to being the first known case of KJB anywhere in about half a century.

Porter had been complaining of debilitating pain in his knees for several days, occurring at seemingly random times. KJB has historically been known to afflict primarily footballers, and has even ended the careers of some. Some physicians, however, claim that KJB is a fictional disease. "It sprang up in Lemmitania early this century," said Dr. Mark Watson of SRMC. "But the existence of the disease was never proven, and virtually nobody outside Lemmitania ever suffered from the disease. I think this is a sign of poor sportsmanship on the part of Mr. Porter, to fabricate such a disease as an excuse to take a break from playing."

Porter himself could not be contacted about the situation, and the Sokojiwa City management remained tight-lipped on the matter.

"Thank you all for coming on such short notice." Bedistan Football Association president Sam Bacon smiled widely, but the crowd didn't smile back. Bacon was not very well liked by Bedistan's journalistic community. "I'm sure you all know why I've called this meeting," Bacon quickly continued. "Our national team has been without a manager since Mike Davidson was sacked at the end of World Cup 24. Well, I am pleased to announce that the Association has found a suitable replacement. He is a man who is already very well known in the footballing community and has won numerous competitions on the national and international level. However, he is very different from all our managers in the past. But I believe it is a change for the better. So without further ado, please welcome the new manager of the Bedistan Lions, Mr. Kenter Surf!"

The announcement was greeted by stunned silence by the often xenophobic Bedistani press, apart from one solitary - but loud - voice:

"BUT HE'S FUCKING VILITAN!!!"

The Audioslavian reporter was hastily removed from the auditorium before he could hurt Surf, himself, or anyone else.

"I'll take some questions from the crowd now," Surf stated calmly.

One very eager young reporter at the front opened the questioning. "Sabrina Higgins, Sonoma City Herald. How does it feel to be the first ever foreign manager of the Bedistani team in its entire eighty-year history?"

"Well, I'm extremely honored to have been chosen for the job," he replied. "Though I've had many years of experience with my old position managing Yeaddin, it will definitely be a great challenge for me, but I think I'll be up to the task."

Another reporter raised his hand. "Ryan Quimby, Columbia Times. You're the second Vilitan to take charge of a high-profile foreign national team in the last five years. Is the Vilitan position not as attractive as it once was?"

Surf answered the question with exceptional calmness. "While it is true that the Jungle Cats are not currently at the level they were at fifteen or twenty years ago, I fully believe that they are just in a bit of a slump right now and that Vilita will quickly regain its rightful position among the world's elite. And in case you haven't noticed, Vilita just appointed a new manager; do you really think they'd be looking for another one already?"

Another reporter piped up. "Diego Ramírez, Port Lusambo Tribune. What are your expectations for the upcoming World Cup?"

"I expect to win it. We've got the personnel, we've got the players, we've got the teamwork, all we have to do is stay in shape and we should have no problem going all the way. At least as long as we don't face Liverpool England again."

Dozens of hands shot up in the air, but Bacon chose to terminate the press conference at that moment, thanking the reporters for their time. Meanwhile, the rest of the nation would need some time to let this piece of information sink in - the Bedistani team was being led by someone who wasn't Bedistani...this was absolutely unheard of.

The Weegie Star - Sport Report
Double Trouble
Sports Correspondent Ron McPherson looks at the WC25 striking partnership that may make the opposition see double - Lylia Foresters' Taichnas twins.

Lylia City seems to make a living of churning out interesting Weegie strikers. There was the fast and nippy Riordan, the huge, sharpshooting brute that was Danny McCann. Few people know that legendary striker Jamie Smith was also born in Lylia City as well before he was picked up by the Mackintosh Thistle Celtic youth setup, which was as ubiquitous then as it is now. So Lylia City has a reputation for great Weegie strikers, and also a record for improving strikers time after time, since looking at Smith and looking at Riordan, it's easy to see that Riordan has the greater talent, although that's not to slight Smith's efforts. Maybe it's something in the water, since Jamie Smith came about way before the Foresters set themselves up in what was the largest Weegie settlement not to have a professional football team. Maybe it's the surroundings, Lylia always having a verdant, rich air about it that seems that anything can grow in it, and frequently does. And now, as if to prove this continuing cycle of growth and talent, two new strikers simultaneously explode onto the Weegie football scene. The Taichnas twins.

Of course, a Taichnas is familiar in Weegie myth as a sort of supernatural being that heals the sick, and it might just be that the Taichnas twins do this for both the Weegie football team and their own team, Lylia Foresters. the Foresters have looked anaemic since Riordan left them and football, and the Weegie side that was going to head to WC24 looked so ramshackle and gave echoes of a million humiliating defeats that the WFA decided just to start from scratch with a new team building program. And so far, it seems to have worked well. David McInally, though young for a goalie, shows considerable level-headedness under fire, with the kind of reflexive skills that are useful against attack-minded opponents, of which there are many in the World Cup and in the Weegie Premiership. Petersen, the giant blonde Rigan/Weegie, harks back to those brick wall defenders who utilised great strength to prevent nimbler, more skilful opponents from threading through them, his powerful tackling leaving more than a few skinned knees. Cameron Harris reminds of a young Ferguson, the Weegie who went off to Giant Zucchini before he lost his way considerably. A player with excellent vision, able to make tactical judgements in that all important battle for midfield control.

And then there are the Taichnas twins. Both Steven and Stuart are identical, and at 5'10" are short, for Weegies, at least. They have an excellent turn of speed on them, which again reminds us of the best of Lylian strikers, but they have a more stocky, stubborn constitution to them which may prove vital in the more rough and tumble of the World Cup Qualifiers - sometimes the delicate Riordan, and other less well-built Weegie strikers, ended up swallowed up in the penalty box, unable to make themselves felt as a significant force in the box as other defenders imposed their will upon them. This looks not to be the case with the Taichnas twins, who are able to make the box feel their will, make themselves known in the box, and will not fade away. I haven't felt so excited about a player (or, well, rather, players) since... well, Riordan, or Smith. Let's hope they can live up to it with decent performances.

"It's a scandal, I tell you!"

Bill Posters was not a happy man. In fact, it would probably be OK to say that he was feeling more than a little hard done by. It was just like playing for NEWI Cefn Druids all over again. This time, though, there had been more than just the nation's pride at stake. There had been a nation's livelihood.

The exit polls were the first clue. Signs that all had not gone according to plan for the Posters camp were there. In the early hours of the morning after, their fears had been confirmed. Now Druida was under the leadership of Huw Ellis, but worst of all, it seemed to have gotten its alcohol problem back.

"I know Bill. We'll get to the bottom of it in the end."

Liam Gessemschmitthaagen-Po, who had been Posters' running mate, seemed calmer, but no less bewildered at what had gone on.

"But bill... what can we do about it, though?"

"Well, first off, we'll have to get out there and talk to the people, see why they did what they did and why they've fallen off the wagon."

"Then?"

"Then we have to try to get them back on the wagon again."

"Oh. OK."

"We needd to get the MDS campaign back on the road."

"The voting is over, the votes have been counted and verified, and the manager of the Krytenian National Team for the next world cup is...."

Pause.

"...DAVE VAN STAVEREN!"

Many, many cheers rise up from the audience, meanwhile DVS himself bursts into tears, overcome with joy.

"There will be a press conference later this evening, but now, on behalf of everyone here at KBS, I've been Rob Crighton, goodnight!"

JMC: WC25/26 EDITION - SECOND GROUP OF SHIRTS RELEASED

ALASDAIR I FROSTICUS
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/AIF07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/AIFAway07.jpg
Hypo-allergenic and vacuum-packed direct from a germ-free room at JMC HQ, AIF's new shirts are designed to be as sterile as a football shirt can hope to be. Once they've been unwrapped, however...

The ARCHREGIMANCY
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Arch07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/ArchAway07.jpg
The Archregimancy's new kits are devoid of a sponsor's logo as JMC have decided such a thing would be inappropriate.

ARIDDIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Ariddia07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/AriddiaAway07.jpg
The Rouge-Noirs have requested a "clean" kit - devoid of sponsorship markings.

KERICIA
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Kericia07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/KericiaAway07.jpg

YAFOR 2
http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Yafor07.jpghttp://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/YaforAway07.jpg

JMC's Superstore [OOC: Kit Storefront thread] opens soon, meantime TG Krytenia if you want a JMC kit.

New Shirts Unveiled as Kericia Prepares For 3rd World Cup

For the first time in it's history, the Kerician International Football Association is presenting it's national team with brand new uniforms, courtesy of JMC Designs. Star forwards Cooper Brehm and Kurt Cedarholm modeled the new home and away jerseys at a press conference this morning. The new kit recieved a warm welcome from players, media, and fans alike.

Also at the conference was Robert Friske, answering questions as Kericia's head coach for the first time. Friske takes over for Ken Peterson, who recently accepted the role of president at KIFA following his retirement from coaching the national team. Peterson hand-picked Friske for the position, also the coach of the Kericia Elite League's Levine Seagulls. Friske hopes to advance Kericia past qualifying in their third attempt. The team has finished one spot out qualifying for two consecutive Cups.

Leading the attack this year will be 21-year-olds Cooper Brehm and Jeffrey Bryce and 23-year-old Kurt Cedarholm. It is Brehm's third World Cup, and first as a starting forward. Veterans Matt Glannon and Mathew Behrendt anchor the midfield, along with first-time starters Pat Hurley and Eric Schey. Two more veterans line up as defenders in Chris Williams and Aaron Massey, while former forward Jon Krueger has oddly switched to defender after failing to get the start at forward. Byron McMichel will once again start in net as defensive captain. The success of Kericia undoubtedly will fall on McMichel's play as goalkeeper.

THE MONASTIC TIMES

NEW ARCHREGIMANCY KITS UNVEILED
By Father Nicholas the Scribe

The Holy Synod of the Archregimancy sent their thanks to JMC and Krytenia today for their efforts in designing official World Cup kits for the world's best team of footballing Orthodox monks.

"What particularly pleases us" said Metropolitan Pyotr of Pantaleimon "is the lack of corporate sponsorship on the shirts - while we were reluctantly prepared to render unto Caesar and acknowledge the kits' designers through the presence of a JMC logo, instead there's no logo at all! We shall certainly be offering a grateful prayer for the nation of Krytenia after vespers tonight"

When pressed to comment over JMC's design for the team's away kit, His Holiness replied "well, it's slightly un-orthodox, but not in a theological sense. It's a pity to lose the stripes, but it's certainly more attractive than an early 90s Arsenal away kit", leaving the audience wondering why an ancient 1st century AD military establishment would want to dress themselves up as footballers.

In other news, kits also arrived for our guests Alasdair I Frosticus, who will be playing all of their home matches in the Archregimancy. Team manager Juan Tzimisces was said to be grateful to JMC and Krytenia for making the effort to ensure that no further plague-inducing viruses were present in the kits, and that the team would try them out just as soon as their new togs had undergone an intensive 5 week quarantine process.

OOC: apologies for putting both nations' reponses in the one thread, but the current jolt problems mean I can't log on to the forums as Alasdair I Frosticus right now

AFA "extremely pleased" with JMC kit

Both Ariddian Football Association President Anna Teals and team coach Adam Seul have expressed their gratitude to the Krytenian company JMC for the new kits the PDSRA's players will be wearing for World Cup 25. Teals said she was "extremely pleased", and that the kits "uphold the spirit of our former teams. I'm sure our players will go far wearing them."

Yaforite Kits Announced

Upon hearing the news of the new kits for this years World Cup, manager Keron Alhrem was extactic. However, upon actually seeing them (along with a representative of Sports Authority, the official sponsor of the YAforite team, a mega-sporting goods store which has seen an increase of nearly 24% in the weeks since the announcement of the sponsorship) he smiled, a wide smile of delight. He later released a statement; "They're the best we could have imagined, better that our wildest dreams! We applaud JMC to the limit! Bravo!"

Location: a conference room in FAB headquarters packed with journalists, the room decked out in the traditional green and gold. Rumour is rife as to why the FAB has called such a hasty press conference. One journo whispers to another "What do you reckon then Bob?"

"Dunno. Keith over there reckons its something pretty major."

Islwyn Forbes, fresh from undertaking the oh-so-essential duty of making the draw for the Baptism of Fire regional final, stode into the room and took his place at the table in front of the assembled press. He performed all the clichés correctly - straightened his tie, cleared his throat, tapped the mic to check it's still working. So far so good. Time for him to end the suspense.

"Bore da, and thank you for attending at such short notice. As you may know, our last World Cup campaign was rather disappointing to say the least, and we felt it is time for a new approach to this game. Public opinion and indeed the performances of other Bettian sports teams have all leaned toward the philosophy of
'attack is the best form of defence'. Indeed, the squad named for this competition is far more attack-minded than before, so we at the FAB have consulted with Munir At-Tariq, who has done a fantastic job with the team, and agreed to appoint a new manager who I'm sure will develop our squad's capabilities to their fullest, having had vast experience in previous World Cups. Unfortunately he's not here at present as he has a few things to sort out back home, but I am pleased to announce that the Aroras' new manager is Laxtu Takil."

The room roused into a murmur as the assembled press whispered amoungst themselves.

"Takil? He's a good coach... how did that manage that?"

"Dunno, but isn't he a bit, well, karelan for us?"

"Hmmm..."

------------------------

After the press conference, Forbes strode into his office, poured himself an orange and pineapple smoothie and slumped into his chair with a smug sense of self-satisfaction. "It's a shame the President's in Nedalia on diplomatic business. Hey, maybe I could stand for President after this!"

"Sir, may I have a word?"

One of his underlings stood at the door with a concerned look on his face.

"Yes, come on in. Whats up?"

"Well, its this hiring Takil business. Are you sure its a good idea?"

"Why the hell not? I mean, look at his credentials."

"Its not his credentials I'm worried about, its his philosphy. He's known for being rather defensive."

"Nonsense. Are you thinking I haven't done any research on this? I mean, just look on the Wiki - it's right there..."'System Takil: A rejistani expression for All-Out-Attack (2-3-5). It's name derives from the fact that coach Laxtu Takil used it in the World Cup qualifiers.'"There, you see? System TAKIL. You got a problem with that boyo?"

"No sir, its just that if you look elsewhere you'll see this."'During his time as coach, he was known for being defensive minded. His highly defensive tactics, caused Teke Daran to be displeased with him. After one of the many discussions, Laxtu Takil let the Orange-Blues play 2-3-5. This didn't change the mind of the president of the ASR but created the term System Takil.'
Forbes' face went into shock mode at seeing these words, looking as though he was about to burst into tears.

"Erm, well, ah, urm.... oh cach! Maybe it'll turn out for the best. At least the new kits look nice, right?"

The Aeropag Tribune—Proud sponsor of profitable sports organizations nationwide

Business: CHFF declares bankruptcy
NEW SEOUL, NM—The Commerce Heights Footballing and Soccer Federation (CHFF), the organization that has maintained a national soccer team for the last 18 World Cups, was forced to shut down today due to financial difficulties. The New Seoul–based organization owed substantial sums to the CHEAT Alliance, due to the tremendously expensive Sokojito Überdome (소코지토 우버돔) project, and the Krytenian corporation known only as JMC, from which it purchased high-quality team equipment using money it did not have. Marvin Goodwin, the CHFF’s CFO, refused to comment on how the company’s financial crisis occurred, but some analysts have speculated that sponsors of the C4™ Champions League™ demanded compensation when the league was shut down abruptly after only one season. In an effort to help settle their debt, CHFF president Lance Lasala has turned over ownership of the national World Cup team to CHEAT, which has agreed to manage the team through the conclusion of World Cup 25. CHEAT is expected to create a new division to act as a long-term replacement for the CHFF, but has made no announcement even hinting at the possibility of long-term ownership of the national team, or the creation of a new domestic league.

KFA RELEASE WCXXV KITS

The KFA are pleased to announce their new home and away jerseys, prodused as ever by JMC Sportswear, to celebrate their 40th anniversary of international competition:

http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/wc16bids/Kry25.jpg

The home shirts are a new version of the original 3wide shirts worn by the Krytenian team during WCXV, whilst the away shirts are ruby red and silver to celebrate not only the KFA's Ruby Anniversary, but the World Cup Silver Jubilee.

PRAYING2GOD SOCCER ASSOCIATION EXTENDS SYMPATHY TO CHFF

The Praying2God Soccer Association released a statement today extending their sympathies to the CHFF in response to their announcement that they had declared bankruptcy. The P2GSA announced that they were going to look at their books to see if they could donate some money to the CHFF to help them get back on their feet.

Casari4sport

GMC Hill announces formation changes prior to world cup
"Depth" New buzzword around CSA HQ

GMC Vivica Hill announced today that, after training and practice, the Casaran national team will be converting from their usual 4-3-3 formation to a slightly more unorthadox 3-1-2-1-3.

"Why do we have a formation with five numbers in it? Because it sounds cooler with more numbers. We're experimenting with some new things around the CSA, and complicated formations are just one of them. Our formation promotes instant flexability and more options when it comes to substutions."

When asked if this was just a 4-3-3 or 3-4-3 disguised as a new formation, GMC Hill yelled various curse words at the assembled press and stormed out.

Casari4sport

GMC Hill announces formation changes prior to world cup
"Depth" New buzzword around CSA HQ

GMC Vivica Hill announced today that, after training and practice, the Casaran national team will be converting from their usual 4-3-3 formation to a slightly more unorthadox 3-1-2-1-3.


The Holy Synod of the Archregimancy today declared that there was no cause for concern for Casarian footballing souls following the announcement that Casari would be changing to an unorthodox 3-1-2-1-3 formation for the forthcoming World Cup qualifiers.

"I've said it before, and I'll say it again" said Fr. Seraphim the Occasionally Dangerously Free-Thinking Theologian, "our football supporters should be able to tell the difference between theological unorthodoxy - as practiced by the heathens of Kaze Progressa - and sporting unorthodoxy, which is perfectly fine. Unless, of course, Casari were trying to make some sort of symbolic statement on the nature of the Holy Trinity through their formation. Which, given that they're far more likely to be making a symbolic statement on the nature of hooliganism, I think we can safely say they aren't."

Casari4sport

Continued reassurances by the Archregimancy Reassuring
Difference between football and religious unorthodoxy being clearly defined

After more continued reassurances by the Archregimancy that their growing soccer unorthodoxy is in no way damning their immortal souls, apparently unlike the hellbound heathens of Kaze Progressa, church attendance is nearing an all-time high.

"Just because we have a horrible streak of rioting and hooliganism doesn't mean we avoid regular religious practices." A random fan stated after he finished flipping over a car.

Actually figuring out how to spell orthodox correctly making many reporters angry
"I hate that freaking word."

Citing increasing numbers of publications misspelling the word orthodox and it's various negatives and alternate forms has led the Casaran Language Ministry to replace it with the term "havablab".

A ministry official said, "While havablab might be a slightly unhavablab word, we're hoping that everyone gets used to it after a while."

Use of Orthodox in a proper noun sense will not be changed.

GMC Hill dismayed that symbolic statement on hooliganism not understood
Non-symbolic statement revealed in Revolution Square today

After the fact that the symbolic 3-1-2-1-3 formation undertaken by GMC Hill was less than a success in international terms, a statue has been comissioned by the CSA to commemorate Hooliganism in a more overt fashion.

"We think that this statue will commemorate the long legacy hooliganism has had in Casaran Socieity." Hill said at the unvailing ceremony.

The statue was constructed by the welded-together remains of 20 cars destroyed in the post-Cup of Harmony Semifinal Riot.

The cars include several imports, such as a Blue Renault Megane and a Green Fiat Punto, along with domestics, like the Lerain D540 and a badly mangled Tiger Cub Compact spraypainted with Tyrellia City Colors and Casaran national Team Slogans, which sits on it's roof atop the structure. The entire structure is anchored to the concrete with no less that 40 concrete anchors to prevent it from being stolen.

"We feel that this incredable testament to Hooliganism is something our children will be able to be proud of one day." Hill said.

Ed Wilson is reading his copy of the Daily Druid...

The Daily Druid

SHOCK AS ELLIS WINS ELECTION
By Trevor Connolly



Wilson: "Well, we did it!"

"Did what?"

"We got what we wanted, we got Druida drunk again!"

"But... how?"

"Well... nothing too dodgy..."

"As in..."

"Well, free samples of "bottled water" near polling stations with "Vote Ellis" on the labels."

"You..."

"And this..."

Wilson puts a video into the player. It soon becomes clear that this is a political broadcast on behalf of the Keep Druida Drunk party.

"Now... hang on a second... there, did you get that?"

"Get what?"

"See, your brain doesn't recognise that you did straight away, but..."

"Do you want sugar in that?"

"See!"

"See what?"

Wilson rewinds the tape back, then plays it back frame by frame.

"See... that one frame of film says, "Go make tea!""

"So why does that make people vote for Ellis?"

"Well the one that went out didn't say "Go make tea!", it said "Go get drunk! Vote Ellis!"

"You mean we won it by using subliminal messaging?"

"Yup."

"So does that mean there's no need for Rogue Alcoholic States any more?"

"Yup. Welcome to "The Rogue Alcoholic States of Druida!"

*we see an empty stage with a solitary microphone at a podium, until Pastorville Head Coach Reverend Brown walks onto the stage and to the microphone*

"It is with great pleasure that on the behalf of the Pastorville Soccer Association that I am standing before you today to announce the nickname of our squad, for at least WC XXV, and very possibly beyond.

*drumroll sounds*

"It is my pleasure to introduce the Pastorville Saints!"

*Saints Head Coach Reverend Brown walks off the stage to thunderous applause*



OOC-Thanks to Hockey Canada for the idea, not that they had much competition, as they were the only ones to submit a nickname suggestion to me.

2 years ago...


“I’LL BE OK!”

“YOU’D BETTER BE, NO ONE WHO’S GONE IN THERE HAS EVER GOTTEN OUT!”

The young David Googe waved his old man away fleetingly. “Come on Francis,” he said, motioning to his exploring partner, “the game is afoot.”

The young pair trudged off the borders of One Red Dot, into the dense forests of what was rumoured to be the legendary ruins of Giant Zucchini, both knowing they may never come out of there alive. Many an explorer has entered the forbidden forests, but not one of those have emerged from the forestry ever again. But David was no ordinary explorer.

He was a weird explorer. But nevertheless, they continued on their way, the both of them. Francis Montgomery was David’s trusted associate, being college roommates. David was always the leader, but Francis always ensured that David had someone to lead. So naturally, Francis followed David deeper into the Zucchini jungle. The light behind them was fading fast, and the dense canopy above them meant that after 2 hours of walking, they needed to bring out their torches.

As they delved deeper into the unknown terrain, Francis had an unsettling feeling that people were watching them, like lions to a prey. He shined his torchlight around him, through trees, branches and the occasional stone structure; one of the only clues to civilization in this otherwise totally feral habitat.

“Stop!” David exclaimed in excitement. “Shine back there again.”

Francis swept his light slowly where he had shined.

“There! Do you see it?” David could barely contain his exhilaration.

Then, Francis saw it for himself. He walked slowly to where he saw that little glint, that little flash of light. It was almost totally covered by fallen leaves, but just enough was showing. He picked up the metal shard. It was obviously torn from a larger sheet of metal. He blew the dust off to reveal a mass of letters, but there in the centre, three big bold capital letters stood out from the rest.

“Urk?”

Sea Dragons Ready for WC25

The Sea Dragons of Andossa Se Mitrin Vega are ready to make some noise in their first WC experience. After cruising to the finals of the BoF undefeated the were bested in that match by their friends, Cuation, 2-1. It was a rocky BoF at times with two deaths to be mourned during the process. But in the end it was a great start to international competition for the team.

The JJJ was not so kind to the Sea Dragons as they lost 6 consecutive matches before topping the Archregimancy for the coveted Wooden Spoon. However ASMV has nothing to be ashamed of as the competition there was some of the best in the world. The only team to beat them by more than one goal was Liverpool England - nothing to be ashamed of at all.

Now with high hopes, ASMV enters WC25. Their relentless defense and lightning quick attack should serve them well

The World Cup 25 qualifying draw is to take place this weekend. The World Cup 25 Organising Committee confirmed the use of seeded pots in this draw and also confirmed that there will be ten groups of ten teams.

Each group will contain one team from each of the ten pots, which have been sorted based on the latest KPB rankings. There were a small number of tied rankings across pots; these were sorted randomly.

The pots are as follows, with the teams in each sorted alphabetically:

POT 1
Bedistan
Cockbill Street
Krytenia
Liverpool England
Oaker
Rejistania
Sarzonia
Squornshelous
Starblaydia
Turori

POT 2
Commerce Heights
Crystilakere
Druida
Eauz
EL CID THE HERO
Lovisa
Nova Britannicus
One Red Dot
Svecia
Tadjikistan

POT 3
Bipedal Apes
Caprine States
Five Civilized Nations
Fmjphoenix
Harlesburg
Jeruselem
Nedalia
Oglethorpia
Spruitland
Vilita

POT 4
Bettia
Casari
Chicanada
Hockey Canada
Hurfordia
Kipto-Mare
Kylaai
Lethislavania
The Lowland Clans
The Weegies

POT 5
Hypocria
Kericia
Milchama
New Montreal States
Oliverry
Raptor Claw
Ruventsoria
Spaam
The Archregimancy
Tonissia

POT 6
Brazillico
Dauna Hills
Elrich
Limbrogidlia
Nanakaland
PopularFreedom
Praying2God
San-Lorenzo
System Karela
Yafor 2

POT 7
Andossa Se Mitrin Vega
An archy
Cuation
Da Philelfya Empiya
Euroslavia
Giant Zucchini
Pastorville
Ratlea
Revolutionarian Island
RyukyuDaitoKazanNampo

POT 8
Athestan
Aztec Kingdom
Collonie
Israel4Ever
Jacobian Tribes
Kudlastan
Michael Sticklandttttt
Newcommunist Republics
Spookyville
The Macabees

POT 9
Adam Island
Alan Shearer Heaven
Bakostrovia
Corruptomania
Crendonia
Kunar
Rordia
The Gupta Dynasty
The Solar Association
Trebnak

POT 10
Adrasuvare
Alasdair I Frosticus
Alemeinia
Ariddia
Da WhoseLine People
Demonlord12
Jon Parkin
Metfield
Pagajeucianism
Swilatia

GIANT ZUCCHINI IN WORLD CUP 25!

After a frenetic period in the closing stages of the World Cup sign-ups, the Zucchinis have managed to squeeze into a place in the latest installment of the World Cup. This has led the Giant Zucchini Football Association to commence a frantic search for a manager to lead the Zucchinis into the qualification run. Among the top names linked to this post are Dovid Yekhanurov and James Gorton, who have been achieving good results in the Giant Zucchini Premier League with their clubs, FC Spartak Vostochno and Anglo FC respectively.

Yumbo Jumbo of ASMV is pleased to announce its sponsorship selection as the official bubble gum of WC25. Each participating nation will be awarded its own flavor gum to be packaged in the team's colors with their logo as well as the logo of WC25.

Here are the assigned list of flavors:

1 Adam Island - Blue Raspberry
2 Adrasuvare - Lemon Ice
3 Alan Shearer Heaven - Strawberry/Kiwi
4 Alasdair I Frosticus - Coconut Cream Pie
5 Alemeinia - Key Lime
6 An archy - Margarita
7 Andossa Se Mitrin Vega - Dragon Fruit
8 Ariddia - Mint Chocolate
9 Athestan - Passion Fruit
10 Audioslavia - Peach Crush
11 Aztec Kingdom - Sour Lemon
12 Bakostrovia - Cotton Candy
13 Bedistan - Pomegranite
14 Bettia - Blueberry Bop
15 Bipedal Apes - Banana Mania
16 Brazillico - Cappuccino
17 Caprine States - Candy Corn
18 Casari - Khaluah
19 Chicanada - Sangria
20 Cockbill Street - Irish Cream
21 Collonie - White Grape
22 Commerce Heights - Black Cherry
23 Corruptomania - Pineapple/Orange
24 Crendonia - Gooseberry
25 Crystilakere - Mountainberry
26 Cuation - Hurricane
27 Da Philelfya Empiya - Sloe Gin Fizz
28 Da WhoseLine People - Orange Outburst
29 Dauna Hills - Hot Cocoa
30 Demonlord12 - Cinamon Roll
31 Druida - Gushing Green Apple
32 Eauz - Peppermint
33 EL CID THE HERO - Butter Rum
34 Elrich - Hazelnut
35 Euroslavia - Coffee Combustion
36 Five Civilized Nations - Pumpkin Pie
37 Fmjphoenix - Wacky Watermelon
38 Giant Zucchini - Pina Collada
39 Harlesburg - Caramel Apple
40 Hockey Canada - Papaya Power Punch
41 Hurfordia - Cranberry Crush
42 Hypocria - Hellacious Huckleberry
43 Israel4Ever - Cherry Cheesecake
44 Jacobian Tribes - Grapefruit Gusher
45 Jeruselem - Spearmint
46 Jon Parkin - Chocolate Overdose
47 Kaze Progressa - Bourbon
48 Kericia - Mocha Madness
49 Kipto-Mare - Lemon Ice
50 Krytenia - Ambrosia
51 Kudlastan - Verrrrrry Vanilla
52 Kunar - Cran-Grape
53 Kylaai - Banana Split
54 Lethislavania - Peanut Butter Cup
55 Limbrogidlia - Peach Cobbler
56 Liverpool England - English Toffee
57 Lovisa - Ice Cream Sundae
58 Metfield - Super Strawberry
59 Michael Sticklandttttt - Tuti Fruiti
60 Milchama - Lemon Berry
61 Nanakaland - Fire Hot Cinamon
62 Nedalia - Pinapple Paradise
63 New Montreal States - Plum Parade
64 Newcommunist Republics - Rocky Road
65 Nova Britannicus - Lemonade
66 Oaker - Sour Lime
67 Oglethorpia - Lovin' Lemon
68 Oliverry - Blackberry Cobbler
69 One Red Dot - Strawberries n Cream
70 Pagajeucianism - Butter Pecan
71 Pastorville - Rasberry Tea
72 PopularFreedom - Apple Pie
73 Praying2God - Terrific Tangarine
74 Raptor Claw - Sour Apple
75 Ratlea - Boisenberry
76 Rejistania - Grape Explosion
77 Revolutionarian Island - Cherry Dream
78 Rordia - Cinamon Apple
79 Ruventsoria - Boston Cream Pie
80 RyukyuDaitoKazanNampo - Mango Madness
81 San-Lorenzo - Love Juice
82 Sarzonia - Orange/Pineapple/Banana
83 Spaam - Sour Grape
84 Spookyville - Peaches n Cream
85 Spruitland - Fruit Punch
86 Squornshelous - Cherry Limeade
87 Starblaydia - Amaretto
88 Svecia - Ludicrous Lemon/Lime
89 Swilatia - Orange Julius
90 System Karela - Marshmallow
91 Tadjikistan - Raspberry Rage
92 The Archregimancy - Strawberry Shortcake
93 The Gupta Dynasty - Peanut Butter
94 The Lowland Clans - Popcorn
95 The Macabees - Raspberry Lemonade
96 The Solar Association - Starfruit
97 The Weegies - Furocious Fudge
98 Tonissia - Chocolate/Orange
99 Trebnak - Candy Apple
100 Turori - Date nut
101 Vilita - Blue Hawaiian
102 Yafor 2 - Kamikazee

During a break in training... The team have gathered round their coach, Adam Seul.

Seul stood on the windy, slightly chilly field, holding several sheets of paper in his hands and trying to prevent a gust of wind from blowing them away. Around him, twenty-two men and women hopped in place or rubbed their arms to keep warm. The weather in Ariddia is usually temperate at the very least, but this evening was uncommonly cool.

"We've just been informed that Andossa... Se... Miti... Mitrin... Mitrin Vega" - Seul stumbled over the name slightly - "have assigned us a bubble-gum flavour. Apparently we're, uhm" - he glanced at the top sheet - "mint chocolate."

There was a moment of silence, as the team seemed to process that.

"Well... mint chocolate is nice," Tim Wald said slowly. "I like mint chocolate."

"Why mint chocolate?" John Sanjeeb asked curiously.

"And what's this about, anyway?" Karim Chem chimed in. "It's the first I've heard of it."

"I've no idea." Seul shook his head. "But it's fun. Maybe we'll get free samples. Though we'll have to ask them the ingredients first, make sure it's all vegetarian."

"Did anyone get grapefruit?" Uol Lat asked.

Ta I perked up at that.
"Ooh! I like grapefruit gum. And it's our national fruit, and all. We should have got grapefruit."

"I think someone got it, yes..." Seul answered, fumbling through his papers. "Ah, yes. There. Some country called Jacobian Tribes. They got 'Grapefruit Gusher'."

"I've heard of them," Jean Kitenge nodded. "There was an article about them in Planète."

"Sounds lovely," Ta I commented longingly. "Yellow, or pink?"

"Capitalists," Kitenge went on. "Very religious. Nice scenery, though."

"Erm... It doesn't say. Listen, if you meet any Jacobian players during the Cup, maybe you can swap some. If they like mint and chocolate, that is."

"Hey!" Sandrine Leduc was looking over Seul's shoulder. "The Lowland Clans have got Popcorn." She giggled. Several other players joined her, straining to see.

"Sangria," Lat said, and chuckled. "Maybe the Chicanadans will be drunk."

"On sangria?" Sanjeeb snorted.

"Obviously you've never been properly drunk," Lat countered.

"There's a place called Jon Parkin that's got Chocolate Overdose," Leduc went on. "That sounds painfully delicious."

"All right, all right!" Seul slipped the list to the back of his stack of papers. "We need to continue training in a moment, if you want to be ready to take on all those teams, drunk and overdosed or not. Speaking of which" - he held up another sheet - "the pot groups have just been published, prior to the group draws." He paused. "We're in Pot 10, of course. Right at the bottom."

The team seemed to sober at that.

"Now, to be within the first three pots next time, we'll need to actually qualify," Seul went on.

"Who's at the bottom with us?" Clément asked.

"Mainly teams we don't know much about." He gave them the list. "We're with the Frosticans, though. Which means we won't be drawn in the same group as them."

There was another moment of silence. The deadly aftermath of their previous encounter was still fresh in all their minds. It had already been decided that they would wear a black armband to their first match, in sign of mourning for the thousands dead in the Dreamed Realm, and that a minute of silence would precede their first home match.

"Who's in Pot 1?" Leduc asked finally, and took the sheet from her coach. "Heh. Starblaydia. It'd be fun to go up against them."

"At least our team beat them in futsal," Ue Alt said. There were several snickers.

"All right," Seul put in at last, "we've had enough of a break. Back to training!"

Vilitan's seeing Blue


101 Vilita - Blue Hawaiian

All accross Vilita, stores were stocked with Yumbo Jumbo special addition Blue Hawaiian gum, which immediately started flying right back off the shelves and into the mouths and homes of Vilitans. Vilitan's were pleased with the selection which sees their tropical heritage explored in a taste sensation that will be popping for years to come accross the tropics. Only a limited supply of the special world cup edition wrappings will be availabe, however, and those are sure to go quickly. While the Vilitan's were very pleased with their special edition flavored gum, some of their rivals had mixed fortunes in their gum supply.


14 Bettia - Blueberry Bop

Seeing them in blue makes this particular Vilitan wonder if Blue Hawaiian was the right choice for their own signature. But there is no shame in blue, as long as it's not headed for the conference, that is. Bettian's will be pleased with the color, but not the texture of their gum.


72 PopularFreedom - Apple Pie

A more than fitting allocation, well received in PopularFreedom, a nation prone to playing with itself when no one is looking, and sometimes, when other nations are looking.


56 Liverpool England - English Toffee

Ah, a classic british gum for a classic british nation. Well, not a classic nation, by anymeans, so just a british nation. Well, not a british nation either, so, a classic british gum for a ... nation.


40 Hockey Canada - Papaya Power Punch

A ridiculous flavor for a ridiculous nation. Perhaps iceburg or penguin would have been more appropriate, but the native Canadi...err Hockeyi... err the native 'loos will be excited about the prospect of a flavor from a distant land reaching their shores.


83 Spaam - Sour Grape

*chuckles*


88 Svecia - Ludicrous Lemon/Lime

Not a great surprised for the Svecian's, just an additional shipment of the already-top selling flavor in the nation. Ludicrous Lemon/Lime is a favorite of lightning fans who associate the tangy yellow gum, sold in the shape of a lightning bolt, both with the fortunes of their team and the protector of bling in the country.


42 Hypocria - Hellacious Huckleberry

Happy Hypocria Hyppos Have Hellacious Huckleberry Hokum.



20 Cockbill Street - Irish Cream
57 Lovisa - Ice Cream Sundae
35 Euroslavia - Coffee Combustion
76 Rejistania - Grape Explosion
87 Starblaydia - Amaretto


Surely someone at Yumbo Jumbo botched up these orders, but it's okay, because we can now see what happened. See, Cockbill Street stuck in the stone age doesn't really have a use for gum, other than as a primitive glue. It is for this reason, that they were supposed to receive Amaretto, a flavor that most people don't really know what it is so usually stay away from. However, a clerical error saw Cockbill Street receive the Irish Cream shipment that was certainly destined for Lovisa. With Irish Cream off to Cockbill Street, the Lovisan's somehow managed to acquire the Ice Cream Sundae flavor, fit only for a king, or an idolized and highly poked mod-land, Euroslavia. Angry at not receiving their royal Ice Cream Sundae flavored gum, the Euroslavian's intercepted the Yumbo Jumbo supply ships en route to Rejistania, and ended up with a boat load of Coffee Combustion. Not a first choice for the royalty, but certainly enough to regain that Kinglike feeling, being able to watch the entire empire of Rejistania fall to their knees at the horror of having to do something without Coffee. The Rejistanian's eventually got some gum, unfortunately for the Starblaydian's, it was the Grape Explosion destined for the shores of Lake Bekk, leaving the purple pack rats with that weird flavor thats useful for nothing other than sticking prehistoric objects to... other prehistoric objects.



64 Newcommunist Republics - Rocky Road

A bit of injustice on the Newcommunist Republics. While it will certainly be a Rocky Road for the republics throughout the 18 match qualifications, one must wonder why "Rotting Corpse" did not make it's way to metfield in comparison.


45 Jeruselem - Spearmint
100 Turori - Date nut


Trade?

Chi Sun-Times-Tribune-Star-News-Today

Sports Section

Milchama get Lemon Berry feel sour

The Milchama national soccer team has been given the flavor Lemon Berry to try out by ASMV's gum company. With many more war like names on the market of flavors the soccer team is suprised shocked and appalled that it could not get a better flavor. "Yafor 2 got Kamikaze and Jeruselem got spearmint and even the nation directly below alphabetically Nanakaland, a Karelan team!, got Fire Hot Cinnamon. We demand a better gum flavor.!" That was captain Marc J. Floren speaking. Coach Fairbanks said, "With a name like war in another language you would expect a more violent flavor then lemon berry yet here we are with lemon berry when another less warlike nations are getting great flavors like Kamikaze. We demand a recount!"

The MFA has said that it will burn its shipment of Lemon Berry gum and wait for a, "more appropriate flavor of gum."

In a village hut in Giant Zucchini...

Resident 1: Hmm, what is this?
Resident 2: What?
Resident 1: We have been assigned a bubble gum flavour.
Resident 2: We? What do you mean we?
Resident 1: We. Giant Zucchini. Some World Cup thing.
Resident 2: Ah right. So what is bubble gum anyway?
Resident 1: Oh, it's something you chew and chew. It's banned here.
Resident 2: Oh, that explains it. So what's with this flavour thing?
Resident 1: Oh, you see, we have a bubble gum flavour assigned to us, so they sell it with our team colours and logo as so on. Ours is...Pini...Pani...Pina Collider. Sorry, Pina Collada. You have any idea what it is?
Resident 2: Ah...it sounds Spanish to me. Eh, you, amigo, you have any idea what pina collada means?
Resident 3: Err...sorry amigo, me having no idea what this means.
Resident 2: Oh, right...well, doesn't look too difficult for the intelligent guess...
Resident 1: Well if it's Spanish, we can get rid of the 'a's at the end. Hmm, Pin Collad...AHA!!!
Resident 2: Yes? Yes? Do you know what it means?
Resident 1: Elementary! It's Spanish for 'Collar Pin'.
Resident 2: Ah, so we have bubble gum with the flavour of a collar pin?
Resident 1: I bet it'll look horrible with green packaging.
Resident 2: Or they'll look at the national flag and think it's compressed zucchini.
Resident 1: And eat it and say, "WHAT? This tastes like more like a COLLAR PIN than anything else..."
Residents 1 & 2: HAHAHAHAHAHA...

Starblaydi World Cup 25 Sponsorship Update
Ediraf, Orcinus and Starblaydi Airlines all have things to show

With three of the major companies sponsoring the Silver Jubilee World Cup coming from Starblaydia - more than any other nation - one can point to the benevolent rule of Lord-Protector Tiberius Starblayde, who has guided the nation towards the status of economic powerhouse. In three vastly different fields Starblaydi Corporations are leading the way, perhaps even paving the way for Starblaydia's football team to take World Cup glory this time around.


http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/ediraflogo.jpg

World Cup 25 Referee's Kits Released

As primary Apparel sponsor for the World Cup, Ediraf have released images of the kits that the referees will wear. Obviously, all-black is the first-choice colour, though yellow (pictured), red and green (not pictured) change-shirts are readily available for those teams who play in all- or mostly-black. This kit, which incorporates a secure wireless link - to the special microchip in each matchball - sewn into the pocket, will be able to inform referees when the ball has crossed the goal-line. The excellent piece of technology will allow crucial goal-line decisions to be taken correctly, as well as allow the match officials to look stylish, as Abysmali referee Gurg promptly demonstrates.

http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Starblaydia/Ref1.jpghttp://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Starblaydia/Ref2.jpg

Unfortunately, a demonstration of the ball crossing the goal-line sets up a feedback loop in Gurg's ear piece, leaving him howling in aural pain. An Ediraf spokesman quickly runs onto the stage and halts the demonstration.

"Bloody Ariddian crap technology," he yells, "this press conference is over!"

As the storm troopers closed in on the proceedings on the TV screen, Simeone Di Bradini grabbed the remote control and muted it.

"I bloody hate those Ariddians." He said.

"Calm down, Mister Prez," Orcinus' Chairman Armando Gomez chuckled, "you'll have that vengeance of yours, don't worry."

Sitting in what anoyone else would describe as a massive leather chair, but compared to his hugely muscular 7'4" frame was merely a seat, Armando Gomex, one of Starblaydia's richest men (and that's saying something), was handed a leather folder with Orcinus' latest product range on it. He flipped open the portfolio and browsed through the designs.

"These have all been tested, of course," he said, handing the designs over to Simeone, "just a question of bottle branding, really."

Everything in the Orcinus Vodka product range was getting a re-brand. The straight vodka itself was now to come in three main brands - White, Purple and Black labels (known to insiders as 'cheap', 'regular' and 'expensive') - all of which would have the World Cup 25 Logo on it for the duration of the tournament. The special Nedalian-imported Honsfield Athletic Football Club bottles were there, of course, in red and yellow halved labels. Nedalians in Honsfield supported their club and the company that owned it, after all.

The various Orca Bar flavoured vodkas also had their own re-branding, though Gomez pulled out his infamous green felt pen and crossed out the new marketing slogan 'Is This The Way To Amaretto?' for the newer Apricot, Peach and Almond flavours. His note 'nice rip-off of the ASMV gum, choose a better slogan' would soon reverberate around the Marketing department. Otherwise the shots were fine.

It was the alcopops where Orcinus was really starting to rake in the cash. Acceptable for underage teen drinkers, club goers and trying-to-be-young-and-hip oldies, the various flavours of 'FKB' were proving to be a money-spinner wherever they went. Able to be stacked alongside bottle of beer, as well as with seemingly large yet undetectable ammount of vodka, it was the perfect drink. There was even a no-nonsense brand for manly men who didnt want to be seen with a bottle of brightly-coloured, neon-marketed drink in their hand.

"Want some of this chewing gum?" Armando offered a bowl of Yumbo Jumbo across to the World Cup Committee President.

"I don't even like the taste of Almonds..." Simeone muttered as Armando turned the TV back up.

Miguel De Luz sat in his office at Yumbo Jumbo, reading the flux of reports that had begun to come in from its new international markets. It seemed that that very luttle research had gone into the allotment of flavors in the new WC25 sponsorship deal. Across the room Janice Copeland, VP of Marketing, paced quickly back and forth, obviously distressed. "We should fire that hair-brained idiot who was in charge of this! He has made a fool of us!"

Miguel raised a hand to stroke his neatly trimmed beard for a moment. "Fire him? I think I might just promote him. Yumbo Jumbo is fast becoming the most highly publicized company in the world! Sales have gone through the roof overnight! WC officials will like that as they get a hefty percentage of the profits. I want to drastically increase the production levels so that other team's flavors can be made available to other nations. Not all nations, of course, but just enough to keep us in the spotlight for a bit more." He grinned slyly to himself. "Make sure that rival nations get each other's gum. oh and we should issue some sort of apology."

*********************************************************
Official Statement from Yumbo Jumbo to WC25 competing nations:

"We apologize for the flavors that some of you have been assigned. We are looking into the manner and are checking into what corrective measures can be taken. We welcome any feedback that you have, so that we can do a more adequate job in the future."

"I told you that you shouldn't open other people's mail," Lord Isaac M.C. Chisoko, Foreign Minister, said, "expecially when its large packages."

"Large packages?" Lord Howard Jiminez, Domestic Minister, was equally aghast, "this shipment was the size of a bloody supertanker, full of bubble gum of all things. How were we meant to know that we were supposed to check that it didn't have 'destined for Cockbill Street' on the crates, there are hundreds of them!"

"Apparently the Rejistanians got hold of ours, according to the VOIA [Vilitan Orbital Intelligence Agency]" Chisoko continued, "I wondered what the hell Amaretto had to do with us."

"Bad or just plain lazy research, perhaps?"

"Probably."

"Plum Parade?"

"Yes, m'am."

It was just before the press conference in which NMSoft would announce the WC25 video game, and Minister of Morale Sheila Stonebeck had just gotten the gum flavor list from ASMV.

"I can hear the Milchamans laughing at us from here. Okay, now what's keeping the conference from beginning..." She was cut short as the lights dimmed and Berthaume Niard, CEO of NMSoft, walked out onto the stage.

"Ladies and gentlemen," he began. "I give you...WORLD CUP 25 FOOTBALL!"

The screen behind him showed the opening movie of the game, with clips of the national teams from LE, Audioslavia, KP, Starblaydia, Sarzonia, Bedistan and NMS.

"This screen will be different for each nation. We just picked these ones at random for our demonstration," Niard continued. "Now, if you'll look at the menu screen, I can explain..."

He showed them the basic World Cup mode, in which you picked a nation, played through its group and then (hopefully) into the playoffs. He showed how to redraw the groups at random if you didn't like the groups from WC25. He showed the "friendly" mode in which you could play any of the national teams anywhere you wanted to.

He gave a stunning demonstration of the "build your own nation" feature, in which you picked everything about your team, from it's national colors and jersey to the individual faces of the player. Start in the Baptism of Fire and make your way through the World Cup on your way to becoming the greatest footballing nation in the world!

He then said: "Enough talk. Let me show off the graphics, gameplay and our finest feature of them all - the ability to play anyone from any other nation over the internet, if that other nation happens to have it. Our sophisticated multiplayer systems means that 100 players could, if they had the time and co-ordination, replay the entire World Cup match by match. We won't be doing that, but we will play a game against a Bedistani citizen chosen at random in a contest.

Sure enough, the Bedistani appeared on a small screen to the right of the game screen, and said that he was ready. The assembled crowd cheered when both teams took to the field in their WC10 jerseys ("This only works for a few matchups," said Niard, "but that's all we need.") and started play.

History failed to repeat itself as the players battled to a 3-3 draw, but everyone was happy nonetheless. Think of all the money and publicity this would bring for the NMS!

Present, as always at this kind of vaguely World Cup-related media spectacle, World Cup Committee President Simeone Di Bradini could only sigh.

'Soccer', he thought to himself, typical. If these idiots don't re-brand it as 'Football' for markets like the Starblaydi one they're going to sell less copies than 'Giant Defence Tux and the Temple of Karela'.

"Oh I think it looks excellent," he said to the journalist, "very lifelike graphics. They even made an alright likeness of me for the Starblaydi World Cup 17 team, though I think they were a little stingy with my stats." He chuckled. "Purchasing the rights to license the Ediraf kits was another great move, so NMSoft have produced a great game here."

Bastards.

The Rolestu Sun
President's Day Special Edition - February 17, 2084

Special Yumbo Jumbo gum enjoys moderate success
Numerologists rejoice

BEAAGKH, Kius. - Andossa Se Mitrin Vega bubble gum company Yumbo Jumbo has recently released special edition World Cup 25 bubble gum, assigning a different flavor to each of the 102 participating nations. In the case of Bedistan, that flavor is pomegranate.

"It actually does make some sense," says Bedistan's Minister of Food and Drink, Mark Bronson. "Most of the nation has a tropical climate, and pomegranates do enjoy reasonable popularity here."

The gum can be obtained in special edition packages resembling the Bedistani flag, a green-blue-green tricolor with a bright green sixteen-toothed gear in the center.

"I think it's pretty cool," said Beaagkh resident Konstantinos Theotocopolous. "It's worth it for the packaging alone."

On a related topic, the list of Yumbo Jumbo flavors was given in alphabetical order by nation, and in the list it was revealed that Bedistan is the thirteenth nation alphabetically in the competition. While in most of the world 13 is considered to be a generally unlucky number, it carries quite the opposite connotation in Bedistan.

"This is definitely a good omen for us," says noted numerologist William Moore. "I would not be at all surprised if we saw our second World Cup trophy here."

Casari Broadcasting Alliance
Batten down the hatches

World Cup 25 Soccer leads Confed Sales Charts
Casaran Fans enjoy digitally beating world's elite teams because we'd never got close to it in real life

Sales of NMSoft's World Cup Soccer 25 has rocketed to the top of the sales charts, selling over 1.5 million units in it's first few days on sale.

"This game might even sell more than the domestic soccer game CSA5, which continues to lead the year's sales charts with over 15 million units." Video game industry watcher Bob Lombego said to reporters. "However, some feel that the game's lack of pitch invasions and chair-throwing might hurt sales."

Stars not 'nuts' over flavour choice

When Yumbo Jumbo bubble gum undertook the enormous task of assigning flavours of bubble gum to all 102 teams in World Cup XXV qualifying, the Sarzonian national football team hoped they would receive a flavour that corresponded either to the team's style of play on the pitch or to the culture of their home country.

Unfortunately, they got neither.

"Orange-pineapple-banana?" Coach Barry Owens asked incredulously. "Where the hell did they come up with that?"

"I thought we'd get something like sea salt or something blue," forward Kevin Wilson said. "But this stuff? It's almost gold."

"Don't get me wrong, I like all three flavours," midfielder Jenna Raven said. "But I don't think they were considering what they were doing when they picked a flavour for the world's number one ranked side."

The Stars said they won't lodge a complaint about the flavour choice, publicly at least. But only midfielder Jarret Sanderson said he would "definitely" chew the gum.

"It's gold, isn't it? We're the golden boys and girl of football," he said with a smirk. "Besides, have you tasted it? It's good!"

Two Druidans in a bar (suprise suprise...)

"You seen this? They've done the draw for World Cup 25 qualifying at last."

"Blimey! About bloody time, too!"

"Yeah."

"So who've we got?"

"We're in Group 2 with Commerce Heights, Crystilakere, Druida, E... no wait, that was us... Eauz, EL CID THE HERO, Lovisa, Nova Britannicus, One Red Dot, Svecia and Tadjikistan."

"Sounds a bit tough. Ten of the finalists from the last World Cup in one qualifying group for this one!"

"You should think yourself lucky we're not in Group One!"

"Oh."

"Plus Druida has it's own World Cup gum flavour!"

"What is it?"

"It's Gug... Goshig... it's Gunshing... oh, just look!"

*He shows him the copy of the Daily Druid he is reading.*

31 Druida - Gushing Green Apple

"Apple?"

"Yup."

"Not cider?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or beer?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or wine?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or vodka?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or Whisky?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or Absynthe?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or champagne?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or that dark stuff with the white froth on the top?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or that stuff that tastes like it's been sat in a tramp's boot for three weeks?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or martini?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or gin?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or rum?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or that stuff that tastes like badger's urine?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or badger's urine?"

Nope. Apple."

"Or brown ale?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or meths?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or that stuff that looks like they've just taken it out of the River Gray from right next to the nuclear power station?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Or brandy?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Oh. So no alcohol whatsoever then?"

"Nope. Apple."

"Oh."

"They really should have done their market research before they gave us that, shouldn't they?"

"Uhuh."

Guy Varrenes: Well, look at this
Jimmy Youth: Well, what da hell is that?
GV: It's the list of official World Cup 25 gums. Each team has his own flavour. 102 different ones. It's big.
JY: Yeah! What's the flavour assignated to Oliverry?
GV: Oliverry - Blackberry Cobbler
JY: Well, what do "Cobbler" mean? F****ng English courses in Secondary. Why didn't I listen?
GV: Cobbler... Cobbler... Let me check... What's the name of the translation website?
JY: err... traduismoicasinonjetecasselayeule.oli

2 minutes later, on OSA's president's computer...

JY: How does a computer work?
GV: Just use the mouse and click right there(he shows the browser FireFrog's icon on the Windows 2010 suicides's OS)
The computer windows shows a pr0n site as the starting page

JY: WTH?
GV: Err... my wife deosn't excite me enough so...
JY: Anyway, where do I write this website?
GV: Right there(he shows the address bar)

So, he enters the address and it appears to be the right site

JY: Ok, so, how does it work?
GV: Look, you see this box? Just enter the word you want to translate there. After, you see that little arrow that points to the down? Just click on it and select "Anglais a Francais", or, if you want a less formal version, just select "Anglais a Oliverrien 'sti". After, just click on "Traduit moi ca",

30 seconds later...

JY: So, Cobbler means... Cordonier. So, it should taste... Shoes?
GV: Yeah, doesn't make sense. Let's call Jean Soqueure in his clinic...

Later....

Voice at the phone: Hi! Welcome to "La clinique de rehabilitation de drogues malades mentaux, alcooliques de Marshalliston". My name is Nancy. May I help you?
JY: Yeah! May I talk to mr. Jean Soqueure please?
Vp: Wait a minute... Jean.... Telephone crisse...
Jean Soqueure: Hi. Who's talking yo me?
JY: It's Jimmy Youth. How are you?
JS: Fine. They say I should go in a week. I'm pretty happy about this. Why do you call me?
JY: Well, we would like to know if you find this logical. We received a list from the official bubble gum supplier of World Cup 25. They say that Oliverry's flavour is Blackberry Cobbler. We didn't know what it meant so we went on traduismoicasinonjetecasselayeule.oli to see what it meant. We saw that "Cobbler" meant Cordonier. So, will the gum taste Blackberry mixed with shoes?
JS: If we follow the logic, yeah!
JY: Thank you. Bye!

2 hours later

JY: Time for me to quit.
GV: Ok. Bye Jimmy. I hope you'll come back soon
JY: Good bye

Fony sends out heavy equipment to each team

Being awarded as the Digital Life sponsors for World Cup 25, Fony has started off by sending a Fony Viao FFS1337 to each team so they can do all of their daily updates, team changes, and basically every needed function that a coach would need. Scores will be sent out and recieved by those laptops first, before anyone else. It will also recieve all updates sent out by the hosts or any sponsers. But not only do the teams recieve the nifty laptops, but Fony has also given each player for each team Fony Mpod. To describe the Mpod, is simple. Take something with the concept of a PDA and a iPod, and put them together. Thousands of MP3 files are able to be stored for listening to while working out or traveling or any other little thing. Also the PDA aspect of the Mpod allows the players to recieve schedules from coaches World Cup scores and sent messages to other players anywhere across the world.

This is considered only the beginning by Fony. They have many more plans for the players, coaches and teams involved in the World Cup. Fony wants to do for the participants as its motto says, keeping the world together, one perosn at a time.

Cuation blown away!

After winning the BoF in extra time against the Sea Dragons, our brave, but tired hero's, have dealt with a lot of news, some good and some weird. With the team's kit selling like hot cakes as everybody wants to look cool, the few that don't are tried with treason, the team have been assigned to Pot seven giving them a decent chance in the World Cup. Oh and the Holy Empire has been given Hurricane gum. It sells well enough, mostly due to it being offical merchandise and its growing reputation for cuasing a stirr in the mouth.

The game WORLD CUP 25 FOOTBALL is selling all over as is such things like gamestations and computers. The players will be delighted at the good likeness of themselves as well as the Fony Viao FFS1337 plus Fony Mpod. If anybody wishes to be a good citizen, they will buy this stuff too.

xxxxxxxx

away from the news, resting on a luxary boat while travelling to the land of the Sea Dragons. The team is gathered around the manager and ruler, Jude

Jude looked at the papers he held with some amusment. "The football news first lads. Their are ten pots and this shows a teams standing while also affecting the groups we might be drawn into. Your performances have got us into group seven, alongside the Sea Dragons!"

The players let out a little cheer for the Sea Dragons and a bigger one for themselves till Jude raised a hand.

"longside us is the Pastorville team and An archy. Among pot eight is the Macabee's but I expect them to rise higher then such a lowly postion they have gotten. I want us to be place in pot six for the next World Cup but as long as we don't slip down, I'm happy. Teams from pot nine and ten are teams I expect to beat. Eight and seven teams are going to be tough, six and five being teams we can upset. Anything above us, we will have to look to keep the score down."

Igor handed every member of the squad a peice or paper saying who was in each pool, espically those who had played in the last Baptisim of Fire. Meanwhile Jude had an amused eyebrow raised

"As some of you know, sponsers have been found for many things involving this world cup. One of them is the Sea Dragons who have made offical gum for each nation with World Cup logo on. Now ours is Hurricane, I have no idea what it tastes like. We will be getting some as soon as we land, I want Gary and Peter to try it and if you can work with it, do so. If you can't, talk to the Sea Dragons and see if they will give you something to chew on during he matches. I will be doing the same."

Leslie Butcher was intrested "What did the Sea Dragons make for themselves?"

Jude checked his notes "Um Dragon Fruit. Some very intresting flavours out, I'll post a list on the newboard, later on."

While hurricane's where some cuase for concern for the two islands that made Cuation, the team where bemused at how it could taste. Maybe it swirled in your mouth? They would give it a try, new expirences where always fun.

"We have recived the game WORLD CUP 25 FOOTBALL which should keep some of you quiet on the journey. We will be orgnising tourney's so get good practise on it though not as much as your real football skills. You also each get a Fony Viao FFS1337 to keep up to date on things. Just don't do anything that might be thought of wrong or the press may get on our backs." then I will have to kill them "You also get Fony Mpod to store some music on, I'm sure you will have filled them by the end of the World Cup. Now scram and have fun!"

Jude watched the players go to their rooms as he wondered how Rual would feel about yet again being on the bench, scoring the winner in the final and being the teams top goalscorer would be enough for most players to get in but the team looked balanced at 4-5-1 and Rual made a poor lone striker. Also Stanly Edwards was playing his last tourney, playing well when brought on, didn't he deserve one last shot at glory instead of, an out of postion, Heskey Anderton? But that would once more throw the team shape apart... hard choices had to be made if Cuation was to get out of any group.

There seemed to be quite some excitement in the room as Sandrine Leduc walked in, her eyes going to a corner where two of her team mates were sitting on a rug, seemingly ensconced by some sort of video game. She walked over to them, and found Yves al Jahdali wearing a self-satisfied grin. Beside him, team captain Ue Alt looked rather embarrassed.

“What’s that you’re playing?” she inquired casually.

“World Cup 25 Football,” Yves said, still smiling. Ue didn’t seem particularly inclined to talk. “It’s brand new.”

Sandrine looked at the screen curiously, her gaze moving over the rest of the equipment.
“Where on earth did you get that? I thought the government didn’t have the funds to import video games.”

“They haven’t,” Yves confirmed. “But I’ve got a friend who’s got a cousin in West Ariddia. Over there it’s selling well, and my friend got his cousin to ship one over to him. I’ve borrowed it.”

“Already?” Her eyebrows went up. “Has your friend even had time to try it out yet?”

Yves shrugged.
“Well. . . I promised to give it back tomorrow. It’s a great game! Lots of details.”

“Not too realistic, though,” Ue muttered, speaking up for the first time.

“Why?” She sat down beside them. “What have you two been playing?”

“Starblaydia versus Ariddia,” Yves said proudly. Sandrine looked at him questioningly, eyebrows rising again.

“I can tell you won. Please tell me you were playing Ariddia?”

“Uhm. . .” Suddenly he seemed mildly embarrassed. “No. I left that honour to our captain.”

She looked from one to the other.
“What was the score?”

Yves coughed.
“8-2.”

Sandrine frowned, then snatched his controls from his hand, and called up the game statistics onto the screen. Then she looked at them incredulously.

“I was the goalkeeper? No way! No way would I have let in eight goals!”

“Well. . . You did.” Yves grinned wickedly. “My Starblaydis walked all over the Ariddians.”

“Hey, where’s your sense of patriotism?” she countered, a mock-hurt tone in her voice. “Besides, where were *you*?” She pointed at the screen. “Aren’t you supposed to be a defender? How did those eight goals get past you?”

Ue smiled slightly at last, and Yves looked embarrassed.
“Ue played my character very badly,” he said.

“Uhuh.” She shook her head. “8-2. Me conceding eight goals to Starblaydia. Doesn’t seem very realistic to me.”

“Yeah, well.” Yves shrugged. “Maybe I should just give it back.”

“Not yet, you don’t,” she told him firmly. “Ue, you up for another game? You can be Starblaydia.”

Ue looked at her, and grinned.
“You’re on.”

Sandrine moved over as Yves stood, and she took the controls. She smiled.
“I’ll show you what the Sandrine goalkeeper can do when you play her properly. . .”

Ms. Trezkanova was teaching her Grade 1 class in the little town of Omsk, Hockey Canada whe news that the Hockey Canadians were getting assigned an unusual gum flavour- Papaya Power Punch. Sure the last 2 words were common in Hockey Canada, power for economy and punch for hockey (the country's favourite game).

Teacher: "Class, today we'll learn a new word."

Students: "What word?"

Teacher: "We were given our gum flavour... and it was called 'Papaya Power Punch', despite not being alcoholic or freezing."

Students: "Yayyyyyyy! Learn How to say Pa-pyre-yuh!"

Teacher: "No, it's Pa-pay-a"

Students: "Puh-pyyyy-eh"

Teacher: "Pa"

Students: "Pa"

Teacher: "pay"

Students: "pay"

Teacher: "a"

Students: "a"

Teacher: "Papaya!"

Students: "Poo-pee-ya!"

Teacher: "I need a drink."

One Student: "It's 9:43 in the morning."

Another Student: "Not to mention this is you 6th today."

Random Student: "Yeah, you haven't had the minimum amout today."

1 Adam Island - Blue Raspberry

The island is looking pretty blue with this new gum flavour... but Raspberries are strange to us all.

2 Adrasuvare - Lemon Ice

How in the world do Frenchies get icy flavours like this?

3 Alan Shearer Heaven - Strawberry/Kiwi

Heaven? Are you joking me? Send fruit Alan Shearer back to heaven or start digging ditches.

4 Alasdair I Frosticus - Coconut Cream Pie

Mmmmmmmmmmm, coconut.

5 Alemeinia - Key Lime

Hockey Canadian limes don't have keys. But then again, Hockey Canadians don't have limes.

6 An archy - Margarita

With alcohol in An archy, there might actually be a government put in place.

7 Andossa Se Mitrin Vega - Dragon Fruit

Should've predicted the Sea Dragons would pick such a wierd fruit.

8 Ariddia - Mint Chocolate

Don't know much aboot these guys, but mint and chocolate? Kwazee!

9 Athestan - Passion Fruit

Some passion fruit might put the passion in the Athestan supporters.

10 Audioslavia - Peach Crush

These hosts hope to crush opponents with peaches. What? Who wrote this?

11 Aztec Kingdom - Sour Lemon

Aztecs are long gone, not to mention lemons have been sour for centuries.

12 Bakostrovia - Cotton Candy

How the hell does a place like this get Cotton Candy?

13 Bedistan - Pomegranite

Persephone won't be the only woman chewing on pomegranites in the Underwor- I mean Bedistan.

14 Bettia - Blueberry Bop

Blueberry Bop- the next dance craze in Bettia?

15 Bipedal Apes - Banana Mania

Banana Mania- two simple words to describe the Apes' breakfast, lunch and dinner.

16 Brazillico - Cappuccino

These lucky bastards- taking it all away from Rejis and HC.

17 Caprine States - Candy Corn

Caprine States must have enough corn, but is mixing sugar and veggies good for you?

18 Casari - Khaluah

You can either drink it in the tropics or chew it in Casari... it's just that simple.

19 Chicanada - Sangria

Sangri-what? More importantly, Chicana-what?

20 Cockbill Street - Irish Cream

Honestly, these guys wouldn't know how to make cream if the milk chruned itself. But the irishing Druida and Hockey canada can do.

21 Collonie - White Grape

My mother told me to stay away from white grapes.

22 Commerce Heights - Black Cherry

Black Cherries for a black-balled nation... could it be any more perfect?

23 Corruptomania - Pineapple/Orange

Since when does Pineapple and orange go together?

24 Crendonia - Gooseberry

Ohhhhhh! Does it come with Patte as well?

25 Crystilakere - Mountainberry

They deserve it, mountainberries are usually good for you. Despite those damn bastards taking one we'd like.

26 Cuation - Hurricane

Another bastard nation taking one flavour we'd like.

27 Da Philelfya Empiya - Sloe Gin Fizz

Maybe it's just us, but how many typos can you spot here?

28 Da WhoseLine People - Orange Outburst

We know whose line it is, but the oranges will just burst it out anyway.

29 Dauna Hills - Hot Cocoa

Oh i hear the hills a flowin'...

30 Demonlord12 - Cinamon Roll

Ohhhh 'dem scary demons and dere cinnamon rolls.

31 Druida - Gushing Green Apple

Unless Druidan apples spurt alcohol, don't expect it to sell.

32 Eauz - Peppermint

A minty flavour for a minty nation. What the- since when was a nation minty.

33 EL CID THE HERO - Butter Rum

Druida would gladly trade flavours with EL CID, but heroes need their releif from the real world.

34 Elrich - Hazelnut

Elrich will really be chewing on these nuts.

35 Euroslavia - Coffee Combustion

Look out! She's gonna blow! (While Wuroslavians run away from the combustion, Rejistanians run towards it).

36 Five Civilized Nations - Pumpkin Pie

5 nations, 5 slices of pie. C'est simple.

37 Fmjphoenix - Wacky Watermelon

Watermelons turning wacky? Now that's just ludicrous.

38 Giant Zucchini - Pina Collada

What? No zucchinis? Here's a lawsuit.

39 Harlesburg - Caramel Apple

Spelled with a 'u', chewed with a 'yum'.

40 Hockey Canada - Papaya Power Punch

What? Papayas in the coldest nation in the World Cup? Maybe it'll sell well.

41 Hurfordia - Cranberry Crush

Crush those cranberries! Crush 'em good!

42 Hypocria - Hellacious Huckleberry

Hellacious Huckleberries? Why not Hypocria-Heavenly or Hypocketing-Huckleberries?

43 Israel4Ever - Cherry Cheesecake

Cherry Cheesecake- is that kosher?

44 Jacobian Tribes - Grapefruit Gusher

Hold on- tribes and gushers? It sounds like a zit.

45 Jeruselem - Spearmint

Spears are old as Jeruselem, but mints on them? A few accidental deaths may be put in place.

46 Jon Parkin - Chocolate Overdose

With an overdose, you can expect Jon Parkin to be in the emergency room... or morgue.

47 Kaze Progressa - Bourbon

Bourbon? Wow, those hosts really know how to have fun.

48 Kericia - Mocha Madness

Mocha going mad? Come on, this is Kericia (mad mocha can fit right in.)

49 Kipto-Mare - Lemon Ice

Can Kipto-Mare ice another Cup of Harmony? or flop in the World Cup?

50 Krytenia - Ambrosia

Who or what is an ambrosia?

51 Kudlastan - Verrrrrry Vanilla

It's one thing to be regular vanilla, but another to be verrrrrry vanilla.

52 Kunar - Cran-Grape

Cran-grape? Gene-splicing hitting an all-time low.

53 Kylaai - Banana Split

Males won't likes their banana's splitting in their mouths.

54 Lethislavania - Peanut Butter Cup

Lets hope this is the only cup Lethislavania wins.

55 Limbrogidlia - Peach Cobbler

How do both french countries get cobbler? Delicacy?

56 Liverpool England - English Toffee

The Liverpool English might enjoy toffee, or would it be regular toffee to them?

57 Lovisa - Ice Cream Sundae

Bisons and sundaes? It'll never get off the ground.

58 Metfield - Super Strawberry

Metfield will have a superhero crimefighter in the streets. His name: Super Strawberry! (Now the SS :P)

59 Michael Sticklandttttt - Tuti Fruiti

Yeah, not much to say about here.

60 Milchama - Lemon Berry

Lemons going berries? It's like apples going bananas.

61 Nanakaland - Fire Hot Cinamon

You may need a fire extinguisher when you visit Nanakaland this World Cup Qualifying.

62 Nedalia - Pinapple Paradise

Nedalia is a somewhat paradise- but Pineapple? It can do better.

63 New Montreal States - Plum Parade

The frenchies enjoy their plums, as well as parades. Will the mix cause rejoice or chaos?

64 Newcommunist Republics - Rocky Road

A New communist facing a rocky road in their future- ouch.

65 Nova Britannicus - Lemonade

When life gives you lemon gum, make lemons. But when ASMV gives you lemonade, you just get lemonade.

66 Oaker - Sour Lime

Since when were Limes NOT sour?

67 Oglethorpia - Lovin' Lemon

The name says it all.

68 Oliverry - Blackberry Cobbler

He he, lets make cobbler out of Oliverrian Black Berries.

69 One Red Dot - Strawberries n Cream

The only dot you see there is the strawberry.

70 Pagajeucianism - Butter Pecan

Butter and Pecans? We won't touch that with a 39 1/2 foot pole.

71 Pastorville - Rasberry Tea

Rasberry? It's new, but everyone loves Tea.

72 PopularFreedom - Apple Pie

Lets hope apple pie will be popular as freedom here.

73 Praying2God - Terrific Tangarine

Marketers are Praying2God the Tangarines are terrific.

74 Raptor Claw - Sour Apple

WE just don't like these guys, plain and simple.

75 Ratlea - Boisenberry

feel free to fix the typo from 'B' to 'P'.

76 Rejistania - Grape Explosion

Karelans without coffee? and Grapes that explode in a takil kind of way? Someone won't live to see the end of this World Cup.

77 Revolutionarian Island - Cherry Dream

Revolutionarianism is just a (Cherry) dream.

78 Rordia - Cinamon Apple

Cinamons? What are they? Close relative to the Cinnamon? It sounds like a nice Christmas treat.

79 Ruventsoria - Boston Cream Pie

If there was a Boston in Ruventsoria, the name would make sense to their citizens.

80 RyukyuDaitoKazanNampo - Mango Madness

The name is mad enough, no need for mangoes going mad.

81 San-Lorenzo - Love Juice

Can we get our hands on that?

82 Sarzonia - Orange/Pineapple/Banana

No... just no.

83 Spaam - Sour Grape

All we can do is laugh.

84 Spookyville - Peaches n Cream

Since when was peaches n Cream spooky?

85 Spruitland - Fruit Punch

Yeah, since when does fruit punch? (But when does papaya punch?)

86 Squornshelous - Cherry Limeade

A crazy nation getting a crazy gum- it'll sell.

87 Starblaydia - Amaretto

Wha? Amaretto? These guys aren't back in ancient times.

88 Svecia - Ludicrous Lemon/Lime

I think it should be Ludicrous Svecia, it'd make more sense.

89 Swilatia - Orange Julius

Orage leaders! There's Queen Mango! Look at Chancellor Clementine!

90 System Karela - Marshmallow

Karelans roasting over a fire, but have no worries. Donuts will follow (on the scoreboard).

91 Tadjikistan - Raspberry Rage

The rage is building...

92 The Archregimancy - Strawberry Shortcake

The power of God compells cakes that are short!

93 The Gupta Dynasty - Peanut Butter

Gupta? At least they have a good flavour.

94 The Lowland Clans - Popcorn

Movies will be filled with the sound of chewing popcorn, just not the way people imagined 50 years ago.

95 The Macabees - Raspberry Lemonade

A good flavour- just leave it at that.

96 The Solar Association - Starfruit

Solar? Starfruit? Someone was biased here.

97 The Weegies - Furocious Fudge

Yup, 'dem fudge is getting nastier every year.

98 Tonissia - Chocolate/Orange

How 'bout no? Ya crazy Tonissian bastard.

99 Trebnak - Candy Apple

They have the name, they have the candy. Ladies and Gentleman- Trebnak.

100 Turori - Date nut

Plumbing companies in Turori will rejoice.

101 Vilita - Blue Hawaiian

It IS tropical, but blue? It's just so... blue.

102 Yafor 2 - Kamikazee

No need to complain, but the extra 'e' might cause some controversy.

In a tall building in the centre of Marauding, Giant Zucchini’s capital…

Chairman: OK, we’ve settled that in our last meeting, secretary, take note. Now we hand the time over to you, you have something to show us?
Board member 2: Eh, wake up.
Board member 1: Huh? Oh, yes. I was at the NationStates archives, doing research on our past, and I found these. *He holds up 3 videotapes.* These were created by the Giant Zucchini Broadcasting Corporation, before the 2nd collapse. The first apparently was a blockbuster hit, called ‘The Green Mile’. It spawned the following 2 sequels, ‘Return of the Zucchinis’, and ‘Zucchinis: Resurrection’, both of which were quite notable flops. *He takes the tapes and inserts them into the VCR slot. They wouldn’t fit, so he puts one in first.*


5 hours later…

Chairman: OK, now we’ve seen all 3 videotapes, what exactly are you trying to tell us?
Board member 1: You see, the new World Cup is coming up, I was thinking of doing something like this for our coverage of the World Cup.
Board member 3: But we are not the old GZBC, we’re a totally new, post-collapse organization, why should we…just copy what was done in the past?
Board member 1: Simply because, the current public does not even KNOW the past. It will be something new for them. Worse come to worse, if it’s really boring, we’ll make stuff up! There’s almost no downside!
Chairman: Hmm, interesting idea. Go on…

The next day’s papers…

SPORTS

In conjunction with World Cup 25, the Giant Zucchini Broadcasting Corporation will provide coverage of the Zucchinis’ progress with a special programme, ‘Own Goal!’ (also known as ‘The Green Ripper Strikes Back’ in some countries, or ‘The Grin Reaper Strikes Back’ in some pirated copies) The programme will follow the progress of the national team, while also focusing on Armand Boyer, a young talented midfielder playing for Gallo FC in the Premier League. Filming is expected to start very soon.

In other news, NMSoft’s World Cup 25 Football is proving to be a hit in Giant Zucchini. Of special interest is the ‘Classic Teams’ patch some enthusiasts have created for the game. Featuring the World Cup 3 winning Giant Zucchini team in their classic jerseys, Giant Zucchini historians are finally beginning to see how great their nation really was in the years past. Its validity was reinforced when a famous Dottian historian who declined to be named said that the team in the patch is “more or less accurate. Only the players’ shade of green is a bit off.” The gaming public in Giant Zucchini was in for an eye-opening experience. “It’s amazing! It’s like a bunch of cucumbers displaying amazing amounts of skill. It’s a pity the indigenous race of Zucchinis have become extinct. It would be amazing to see another Urk or Oog or Kerrnigit.” Now, the nation can only hope that the current batch of humanoid Zucchinis can live up to the lofty standards set by their green predecessors.

NMSoft’s World Cup 25 Football is the hootest selling item in ASMV. I ranks even higher than the gum that Yumbo Jumbo assigned to their own team. Thousands wait in lines for new shipments of the games and game systems to arrive.

********
Yumbo Jumbo has announced a new marketing scheme to be added to the mixed results of the current one. Packages of gum with the WC25 logo with be sent to all markets with assorted flavors to be found inside. Hopes are that this will be more popular in certain markets.

********

The Presidential Palace in Errion Vega has finished its preparations for the arrival of the Cuation squad. People from all over the nation are making plans to meet and greet the great friends of their Sea Dragons. The celebrations will be great!

As people walked through the ever-popular McMaster's department store in downtown Griffin, they found themselves greeted with this display:

BEDISTAN 12 - 0 LIVERPOOL ENGLAND
B. English 5'
T. Orr 22'
S. Westinghouse 24'
T. Orr 31'
T. Stalls 35'
T. Orr 42'
P. Romano 50'
B. English 58'
G. Zamboni 62'
B. English 72'
T. Orr 79'
T. Stalls 83'

Cards
L. Gunn 13' 38' E. Miele
M. Porter 54' 62' L. Christensen
73' P. Boyle

This was, of course, a display from NMSoft's heavily-popular World Cup 25 Football, currently on demonstration in McMaster's. Featuring Bedistan's WC25 team and Liverpool England's WC22 team (that being the latest available), the thought of being able to rack up a scoreline like this was mouth-watering, causing WC25F to absolutely fly off the shelves and become a major hit, even far outstripping the Bedistani-produced WCC 2084.

Fedala International: The Macabee Low Moral Syndrome

After the heated loss in their quater-final game in the Baptism of Fire against Pastorville, after a goal scored by the latter in the extra time, the administration cut funding to the only funded sports team in the Empire - the world cup team. Their final position in the rankings was one hundred and fifty second, a good fifty ranks behind Cuation, the main rival during the Baptism of Fire, which out preformed the Macabee national team in all respects except the first game where the Macabees managed to defeat them three to two. The fans in Vilita were at an all time low point and have drudged back home after the defeat. Most were planning to make their way to the World Cup scene but of the eighty thousand planned Macabee spectators now only an estimated five thousand will make their way to the location of the Macabee's games in the World Cup.

The team has promised and has claimed that they will take the time in between the Baptism of Fire and World Cup to train even harder than they did, although they will be taking it a bit easier. The theory is that the team pushed too hard to train, and when they were ready to play they were too tired to do their best. Although a bit ironic, some think it's true. Consequently, daily practices have been reduced from eight hours to seven hours, while the last day before the remains the much deserved rest day for the team as a whole.

In terms of money, the football fans of the Empire had begun a World Cup fund for the team. In the two weeks of its existance it also already raised over forty million Reichmarks, and it's expected that it will raise hundreds of millions before the World Cup is over, giving the team a much needed monetary respite for their next preformance in four years, which is planned to be much better than their current preformance which was dismal. The administration still has said no word on whether their fund cut is permanent or temporary but the fans and players have taken it for the worst and assumed a permanent cut to the funds, although some hold loose hopes that perhaps if they do well their funding will be re-opened. Funding nonwithstanding, the team has sworn to give the World Cup its best swing.

In the news concerning the players, Hans Kahn has been put as the secondary goalie of the team, after his dismal preformance against Crendonia, a third rate team, and Pastorville, when his partner, Derik Vander preformed so well against other teams. Therefore, Derik Vander has been put as the first string goalie. Star of the team, Otto Mannerheim, has been promised a first string position as the foward, as he was the top scorer of the team during the Baptism of Fire. In news of this insult, Hans Kahn has decided to announce his retirement from the Fedala Imperials, one of the best national league teams within the Empire, and has put himself up for purchase, using his experience in the national league [and his raving success] and the success against Cuation in the Baptism of Fire as his advertising.

Nonetheless, in all this tragic news, there is a small string of hope in national football, as the First International Futsal Tournament progresses after a short break after mourning for the deaths of millions in Hogsweat and for all the assassinations in the Baptism of Fire tournament. The national Futsal team has spearheaded its group and is prepared to play its quarter-final game against Ariddia in three days. Perhaps the Futsal tournament will give football fans in the Empire a breather and higher hopes for some success in World Cup 25. Nonetheless, none joke themselves, and they all expect the team to drop out before leaving the group stages. Indeed, nobody expects The Golden Throne to make it to the finals. Regardless, we're all proud of the team and what it is achieving. Nobody can achieve fame in one punch, and they have already promised to follow all World Cups from here on out, regardless of their monetary situation. And of course, the people of the Empire stand behind them.

The Distillery releases "Silver Siagh" for World Cup

Famously secretive Weegie drinks co-operative "The Distillery" have released a special version of its infamous drink Achail-na-siagh to celebrate the 25th incarnation of the World Cup. Nicknamed "Silver Siagh" because of it's silver label (not to mention the silvery colour of the drink itself) as well as its intention to celebrate the silver World Cup, the Distillery (based on the Weegie island of Lylia) hope it to be a massive success, although not in the way it was previously used.

For those unaware of the drink, Achail-na-siagh gained its notoriety during the Mackintosh Riots of 1961, when it was used quite frequently as a kind of alcohol bomb because of the properties of the alcohol - the ease of lighting the "fuse" when soaked with the drink, combined with fierce and sustained fire upon the alcohol coming into contact with the fire. It is argued by some historians that in fact, Achail-na-siagh (introduced into the Weegie market only the year before) was first and foremost a weapon because of its unusual properties, rather than a drink, and was designed as such by the Distillery, who were nearly closed down by the authorities for having known sympathisers with the rebels right throughout the ranks of the organisation. It is admittedly hard to explain how the rioters caught on to its' violent application so quickly.

The Distillery is also known itself for its legendary secrecy. Stories of it are varied, legendary, and hoped to be true by anywhere with a decent brewery and a couple of good pubs. The Distillery itself has never been found, being somewhere in the Lylian jungles, some of the densest and thickest in the Weegies. It is unknown exactly how their recruiting system works to locate new brewers and workers, or how it delivers and gets paid for the products that it sells, and it is believed that not even those who run the co-operative know everyone who works in it, or even if there is anyone running it in general. It is also believed to be under investigation by the IFTA for possible infringements of the agreement, but no IFTA inspectorate has dared go into the Lylian jungles to find it since a SeOCC-lead team came back to civilisation with only half the compliment they had entered with, with one Galdagan babbling about "the eyes... the big hairy eyes!", one Demo-Bobylon twitching continuously, and none of the SeOCC contingent never, ever, speaking again. It is believed that several East Hackneyites were merely absorbed into the co-operative, and are now leading dreamily happy and copiously drunk lives. The Shiree inspector was found years later naked in a tree in Xikuang, but that was apparently his holiday, and no foul play was inferred.

Sub-Brewerdante Marcos, spokesman of the Distillery, appearing in his now well-known garb of a gas mask and a deerstalker hat, had this to say. "The Distillery has always supported football, and we are proud to let it be known that we support the World Cup 100%, no 115% over everything! Except booze, of course. We care about our boozebies too much. The silver label inflammable drink known as achail-na-siagh shall bring joy to many and hopefully firey screaming scabdeath to very few, although we know of the capacity of fiery screaming scabdeath it can bring. We do not condone use of the drink through the detailed instructions on the back of the label (with numbered illustrations) to bring riotous pyrotechnical violence to the masses. Unless Liverpool England wins. Then, as they say, I believe, you are definitely pure getting it, pal. Was that right, yes? Yes, it was. Now leave me alone, I must be getting back to my shed. No, that is not the Distillery. Go!"

Silver Siagh will probably be widely, and wildly, available throughout the Weegies and many other IFTA and CACE nations throughout the World Cup period, and probably some non-IFTA nations as well. Those lucky, lucky gits.

ANNOUNCEMENT:

The Giant Zucchini Football Association has appointed James Gorton as the coach for the Giant Zucchini national team. His vacancy in Anglo FC will be taken over by his previous assistant, Bertrand Paine. "It is an honour to be serving my country by trying to bring them to the World Cup. I will take as much from my experience in Anglo FC as possible, and I will do my best to qualify. Meanwhile, I have the utmost faith in Bertrand, that he will continue to bring Anglo FC from glory to glory."

Meanwhile, FC Spartak Vostochno's assistant manager Lev Andropov has taken up the post as the team's Under-21 coach. There is no news from the club regarding his replacement.

LivEng Airways named primary World Cup 25 Travel Sponsor
-This World Cup 25 Update is presented by LivEng Airways. Trust in travel.-

LivEng Airways was named as the primary transport sponsor for the Silver Jubilee World Cup yesterday, sparking scenes of jubilation in the LivEng Air offices around the nation. LivEng Airways' main task is to provide transport for fans and teams to Kaze Progressa and Audioslavia, and the company have announced that it would also be providing flights for major qualification ties.

LivEng Airways currently has four flights a week to Kaze Progressa out of CCL and three to Audioslavia; the company has projected that this will jump to 15 and 14 respectively. The company's logo and slogan will also be broadcast throughout the World Cup, and has already secured this newspaper's sponsorship for World Cup 25 updates.

LivEng Airways is offering qualification flights to any major match for the following teams (at L£0.05 per team official or player, and L£0.40 per person for non-team members, per nautical mile up to 1000 nautical miles and L£200 flat after that):

Sarzonia
Liverpool England
Bedistan
Rejistania
Starblaydia
Krytenia
Oaker
Druida
Cockbill Street
Oliverry
Hockey Canada

LivEng Airways are also providing flights for all teams and fans to the finals at L£200 per person for teams and L£500 per person for fans, regardless of the origin of the flight.

Teams not on the above list seeking transport to major qualification games are requested to contact LivEng Airways by email (TG or IRC) or contact Starblaydi Airlines.

-This World Cup 25 Update was presented by LivEng Airways. Trust in travel.-

The Cuation team, having had a wild time on the boat, docked in Errion Vega to cheers from their hosts. Glad to be on dry land, they where overjoyed by the celebrations and new people to meet. Jude was his usal quiet self, hoping his players didn't get too drink and not speaking unless spoken too but his squad more then made up for that.

As Peter Tanner said, admist the noise "There is no greater gift then freindship, we are indeed lucky men."

Thunderous applause erupted from the crowd gatheres at the piers of Errion Vega when the Cuation team disembarked. The entire Sea Dragon squad was there to greet them.

Evan Evans clasped hands with his friend, Gary Jenks. "Welcome to the Madness, brother."

The two teams posed memntarily for a group photo, before heading to the stadium.

An unidentified source has reported that a picture of the two teams, quicly snapped and a bit blurry, has already sold on Ve-Bay for more than 1 million paios. Another fan was spotted in an obviously home stitched jersey - half ASVM/half Cuation - and now fans all across the nation are clamoring for these dual jerseys.

LivEng Airways is offering qualification flights to any major match for the following teams (at L£0.05 per team official or player, and L£0.40 per person for non-team members, per nautical mile up to 1000 nautical miles and L£200 flat after that):

Sarzonia
Liverpool England
Bedistan
Rejistania
Starblaydia
Krytenia
Oaker
Druida
Cockbill Street
Oliverry
Hockey Canada



The Daily Druid
LIVENG FLIGHT OFFER CONFUSES DRUIDANS
By Trevor Connolly

An offer by World Cup 25 sponsors LivEng Airways has caused confusion amongst football officials across northern Atlantian Oceania. The offer claims to do cheap flights to all major matches involving selected teams. But the fans in three of those countries, Oliverry, Hockey Canada and Druida, have not been over-awed by the offer.

Trevor Belmore of the DFA told us, "When have Druida ever been involved in a major qualifying match? We suck at qualification! Everyone should know by now that nobody really wants to go and watch us until we fluke a place in the finals!"

Hockey Canadian officials told us that, having never qualified for the finals, that they aren't really going to be involved in any major qualifying games, but then we all know that they were probably just playing down their chances, as Hockey Canadians treat any international fixture as if it were the most important one ever. Good attitude, but I can't see it spreading south over the border.

Officials from Oliverry said something in French. We don't speak French, so we just agreed with them.

Many Druidan officials also noticed that Oaker were also featured on the list. We don't know if this is a rare joke on behalf of the Liverpool English, or if they really are convinced that anyone wants to go there!

FAB Sees Red

In response to the Government's 'Better Dead Than Red' drive, The Football Association of Bettia announced in a press statement that all clubs within the Bettian league would for forbidden to wear predominantly red shirts.

Islwyn Forbes, chief executive of the FAB, told reporters "Lets face it, red is a ghastly colour. It has all sorts of negative connotations - blood, anger, fire, Satan, and all things generally evil. Therefore we have taken this step in order to avoid offending any families that might want to attend matches. We will also be politely asking any foreign clubs or national teams who are coming to Bettia to compete to observe this rule."

Grappenhall United FC, the only top-flight team to be affected by this ruling, unveiled their new kit today, changing their traditional plain red strip to a white strip with a red sash. Their Sarzonian international striker Roy Spencer told the local press "I must say, I much prefer this design - its much more stylish than that horrible red tat we were wearing last year."

AFA responds to the Bettian request

AFA President Anna Teals replied publicly today to the request by Bettia that visiting national teams refrain from wearing, or in any way displaying, the colour red.

"Any games we play in Bettia would of course be with our away kit (http://ns.goobergunch.net/wiki/index.php/Ariddia%27s_football_team#Away), which, unlike our home kit, isn't predominantly red. But there's still a lot of red in it, and we hope that's not going to be a problem. Red and black are our national colours, and, as a communist nation, red has very strong positive connotations for us. The chorus of our national anthem, which would be played at the beginning of any match, begins with the line 'Red and black is our nation'. There'd be Ariddian flags waved by supporters, and there's red on our flag. Would the Bettians find that offensive? We want to be sure to reach an understanding with the FAB over these issues, and we're not going to be deliberately confrontational. But they're tricky issues, and we'll need to find a solution that's mutually acceptable. In case Ariddia and Bettia are drawn in the same qualification group for the Cup."

The players enjoyed the reunion and when they later heard of the joint kit, there was amusment and appluase for the idea. Jude would send word home to have offical ones made to boost the economy.

Jude was silent as he watched the players accidently go into groups, Gary with Evans and Rual with goalie Shaun.

Gary smiled at Evan Evans "I love the Madness! We have nothing like this at home!"

Rual could be heard challeging Shaun to the football computer game as the staduim loomed into sight. Breathing a gasp of delight, the Cuation players forget where they where and ran towards a Home of Football.

Yumbo Jumbo of ASMV is pleased to announce its sponsorship selection as the official bubble gum of WC25. Each participating nation will be awarded its own flavor gum to be packaged in the team's colors with their logo as well as the logo of WC25.

4 Alasdair I Frosticus - Coconut Cream Pie

92 The Archregimancy - Strawberry Shortcake


Somewhere deep in the Archregimancy....

Recent problems with this 'jolt' system that ordinary physical reality insisted on using to communicate had left the Holy Synod of the Archregimancy unaware that Mumbo-Jumbo (for so they believed the firm was named) had declared that the Archregimancy had been given an 'official' World Cup bubble-gum flavour.

The news finally came while Coach Kyrill, Metropolitan of Solovetsky, was listening to the Troparion in the first tone of St. Arethas and the 4299 Martyrs of Negran:
"Through the sufferings which Your holy martyrs Arethas and his companions
endured for Your sake, O Lord,
we beseech You, O Lover of mankind:
heal all of our infirmities."

Coach Kyrill pondered the news while listening to the Kontakion in the fourth tone:
"Today the radiant feast of the passion-bearers Arethas and his companions
comes to us as a herald of joy;
as we celebrate it we glorify the Lord on high."

Eventually he made his mind up, and ordered a press release on behalf of his team:

"We wish to thank the Bumbo-Humbo company of Andossa Se Mitrin Vega for their efforts on our behalf. However, we cannot endorse this well-intentioned offer. This 'bubbly-gums' product is banned in the Archregimancy. Furthermore we cannot endorse the flavour of 'strawberry shortcake' as there are concerns that 'strawberry shortcake' not only encourages gluttony, but is banned during Holy Fasts.

We understand the spirit in which Andossa Se Mitrin Vega has acted, and we will not ask for the product to be entirely withdrawn - just that labelling appears on the 'bubbly-gums' clarifying that it is not officially endorsed by the Archregimancy.

We would also like to ask that the flavour be changed to the more representative 'mushroom cooked in vegetable stock'"

--------------------------------------------------------

Meanwhile, the Alasdair I Frosticus squad, currently preparing for the World Cup in the Archregimancy, were facing even more severe 'jolt' problems, and were unable to express a direct opinion on their coconut cream pie bubblegum. A spokesman for the team later revealed that the squad had heard about the flavour, were particularly excited about coconut cream pies, but that the severe quarantine restrictions currently surrounding the squad made it unlikely that they would be able to try the bubblegum themselves for at least a couple of days.

The Aeropag Tribune—This section sponsored by the CHEAT Alliance

World Cup: Capitalizts shocked by LivEng Airways offers
ΧΡΥΣΑΕΣΤΟΣ, ΑΚ (KHRUSÁESTOS, AK)—LivEng Airways, after having massively outbid Air Paripana for a sponsorship of World Cup 25, announced a discount offer on flights to World Cup matches that surprised many Capitalizts, especially those in Χρυσάεστος (Khrusáestos) and other cities on Sirius D. In a recent press release published by an anonymous newspaper, they stated that they “are…providing flights for all teams and fans to the finals…regardless of the origin of the flight.” After years of TechConGroup’s monopoly on space travel between Paripana and Sirius D, residents of the offworld colony welcome this new competitor, and a survey has estimated that over five million Ακηλαίοι (Akélans) have made plans to travel to the World Cup finals, most of whom have planned side trips to the Paripanan Unified Capitalizt States. Although very few people actually expect LivEng Airways to provide the interplanetary transport they said they would, some people are already preparing to file claims against the airline if they back down.

BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS! BREAKING NEWS!

Siki Rej suffered an overdose of caffeine and is now in the Central Hospital in Kalisimu. His state is 'stable' but doctors say, he shouted PASCAL expressions wildly and doctors insisted on testing his sanity. Currently his vice Hatime I Ra~e took over managing the Orange-Blues.

Ariddian government to allow import of World Cup bubblegum

After much debating, the Ariddian authorities in Rêvane have finally decided to supply funds for the importing of Yumbo Jumbo mint and chocolate bubble gum, special Ariddian World Cup 25 edition. Ariddia is a moneyless society, and the Treasury’s monetary reserves come mainly from tourism and trade benefits. These funds are limited, and serve usually to pay for necessary imports, and for Ariddian citizens to travel abroad.

“We won’t be able to import all that Yumbo Jumbo has produced for us,” Jean-François Pariyar, Secretary for Trade and the Treasury, explained. “But we’ll be buying as much as we can given our limited resources.”

The bubblegum will then be made freely available to Ariddians in ‘shops’ throughout the country.

Additional gum is expected to enter the country via neighbouring, capitalist West Ariddia. West Ariddian shops have obtained some of the unsold gum, and it is expected that West Ariddians with relatives in communist Ariddia will buy some from West Ariddian shops and ship it over to friends and family in the PDSRA.

Yumbo Jummb today issued more than a few official apologies for the flavor selections of the WC25 bubble gum. "Some of the falvors given to certain teams obviously were not well thought out. We are working to see in what ways we may rectify the situation. However, it is unlikely that anything can be done in time to change things defore the WC begins pool play. But we are working on the problem."

In other news, the video game played between Shaun and Rual had been broadcast of the internet by an unknown party. More than 10 million fans from around the globe watched as the two played to a 3-3 tie. Fitting. Sales of the game more than doubled in ASMV alone following the game's conclusion.

Evan and Gary spent the majority of the evening in the stands with the fans, signing everything from pictures to parts of the anatomy. Several players from both sides could be seen dancing on stae as local supergroup Concrete Shaman performed throught the evening.

Everything was even better than could have been expected.

Sales of the gum and game rocketed back home as pictures of the visit came back to Cuation on goverment approved sites. Not only was Jude's postion secure but the economy was benfiting from the teams form. Such joy had a black cloud for Jude, the World Cup itself would be much harder.

Some of the staff where thankful that none of the players did anything worse then dance horribly so it allowed them to listen to the concert and appeirate the good music, when not ribbing Rual for failing to win.

In the morning, the players would be tired and Gary's hand hurt from all the writing.

Dark Clouds Cover the Empire

The hosted First International Futsal Tournament has been another theater of distress. As with the Baptism of Fire, the Imperials, the national Futsal team has been sent home after being defeated by the Ariddians in a heated display of football. This comes after news of the national team's defeat at the quarter finals in the Baptism of Fire, and only adds to the national displeasure within the teams football teams. Indeed, the administration has reiterated the fact that subsidizing of the sport will not be again given for a long time, if ever. Nonetheless, other, more optimistic followers, have called this just a side effect of coming into international competitions late and have stated that through the years both national teams will grow to be some of the best internationally, especially within the context of the Futsal scene.

The national team, now 152nd in status, has continued to train hard during their off time, waiting for the beginning of World Cup 25, and has promised that this world cup they will rise to at least 145th, giving them a jump start for the next world cup in four years. Unfortunately, this is not what was expected in the biggening, especially with the victory over Cuation who nows lies at 104th, forty-eight spots ahead of the Empire. Indeed, the Empire, frustrated at their extremely bad luck against extremely poor teams, have vowed to exceed their old foes in rank in the next two or three world cups and any other football tournaments which may arise to rise their ranks.

Indeed, in a show of strength, the team has challenged the Cuation national team to a friendly match within three days to give an idea that the entire reason that the team fell so far behind was due to a string of the worst luck of any other team, including the defeats at the hands of Crendonia and Pastorville. Should the Cuation team accept both teams will play in a neutral stadium in Guffingford, refereed by neutrals. The game, if happening, is expected to be witnessed by over thirty thousand vibrant Imperial fans who are only a six day drive from the host country [or a short aircraft ride].

When the game concludes, hopefully the team will have a better 'favored' position in the World Cup.

[OOC: I'll have to TG Cuation when I get back from class.]

IC: Commentry for the match runs through the players heads...

It is Macabee's vs Cuation on the first day of the Baptisim of Fire. High hopes for the future but today may reveal who is stronger, a good start is vital!

Otto is clear, just Jens to beat. 1-0! The defence was torn apart by the passing move. A solid start is undone for Cuation

Cuation struggle as Asthon runs down the right. He is having a go... 1-1! What an effort from distance, our beloved team are back in it.

Halftime and with neither side having done much since Timothy Asthon scored. Having recovered from poor play after Otto's goal, I'm sure we will be back in it

The Imperials boot the ball forward for...Otto must score! He has put Cuation behind again. 2-1 down right after the restart and Jude looks angry. Sol Major and Jonthan Yan left it and Gary Jen's head was in the clouds

Cuation regaining midfeild cotrol as the ball is forced out wide. Crossed in and Gary has got...3-1! Gary Jens spilt the cross leaving a simple tap in for the striker. Just as we thought the peroid of pressure was over...Jude looks towards his bench, something is needed now

Cuation unable to break through as Peter Seamen boots the ball upfeild, Peter flicks into into the path of Rual! Only keeper to beat and it is...saved. The goalie did brilliantly to turn the ball away but heads are dropping. Jude sits in his seat with his head in his hands

Final whistle and after such a defeat, can our team qualify? Is this the end of our hopes? The next match will be tough and improvments must be made

xxxxxxxx

After reciveing the challenge and checking that it would be fine with the Sea Dragons, their kind hosts, the Cuation team has accepted the challenge though they are not impressed with the claims of bad luck

Manager Jude spoke to the press "The players are amused that such a great team as the Macabee's would claim their defeats where down to luck. They just had a bad day against Credonia and lost to a strong and very motavated Pastorville, they should be using the defeats as a learning expirence. Still we will be glad to avenge our one defeat and show why we are equal to the Sea Dragons and above the Macabee's."

Jude annonced some changes "We have nothing to prove though avenging our defeat would be nice and so will be treating this as a preparation game, playing 4-4-2 instead of 4-5-1. Heskey Anderton and Roy Ferguson will get much needed rest for Stanly Edwards on the left and Rual Mendisz my top goalscorer. We will practise our fitness and our marking but I have no doubt Otto will find chances and Khan will not let much past...this time"

Many Cuation fans are expected and the players hope that the Sea Dragon fans and players will give them extra backing in match where feelings might run high. Perhaps Roy's suspect temper was the reason for the expirement?

Edgar Moroni today announced that the Sea Dragons will accompany Cuation to their match against the Macabees before the WC gets underway. All the players are excited and thousands of fans also plan on making the journey to support the Cuation squad.

[OOC: Scorinated by Spruitland through mIRC at #sport.]

1:2
Cuation - The Macabees

In a brilliant game the Macabee national team has risen from the slumbers of defeat at the Baptism of Fire and defeated Cuation in Guffingford two to zero in a pre-World Cup friendly match. This seems to reinforce and even increase spirit within the ranks of the national team and has allowed a last hoorah for fans of the team were let down by the Baptism of Fire results. It also has increased local complaints against the Baptism of Fire, including fixed results [OOC: This is completely IC, I'm not suggesting this is the case OOC. I would never accuse that.], although the national football association of the Empire has absolutely refuted said accusations and have backed their peers in Vilita.

The first goal in the game was scored by Otto Mannerheim in the minute '25 in his usual scoring abilities. Indeed, Mannerheim is the top scoring individual in the team since his debut in the BoF. This goal was scored from a brilliant kick outside the box into the top left corner of the goalbox. The second goal was scored again by The Macabees, with the foot of Froemer Paulus in the minute '45, sealing the first half at 2:0, to the advantage of The Macabees. The spectators coming from the Empire were wild during the first half and during half time, chanting pro-Macabee football cheers over and over again, and providing the game with quite the choir of a cacophony of sounds and yells. Cuation fans were not silent, however, and they quickly jumped in to support their team.

Perhaps that's what explains the genius play by Cuation [leaving the scorer out for you to decide] in the opening minutes of the game, allowing Cuation to advance 2:1, still to the advantage of The Macabees. Nonetheless, their offensive seemed to wane in the light of a greater defensive stance, however, they came very near to shaming their foes in the friendly, and it was perhaps a brush of luck which allowed The Macabees to come out with the upper hand when those ninety minutes were over. Luck and scoring nonwithstanding, it was a great game played by both national teams, and both teams have perhaps proven that they will be huge contestants in the coming World Cups, and that they aren't to be underestimated on the field of play.

The victory has been a very necessary moral boost for the The Golden Throne, after a quarter finals defeat at the Baptism of Fire against Pastorville, and a defeat during the First International Futsal Tournament against Ariddia. However, many are still doubting that the team will be advancing much in terms of ranking in the World Cup XXV, although hold high thoughts about advancing little by little over the years.

For news about Otto Mannerheim, he had been offered a one hundred million Reichmark contract, over five years, with the Sidi Rezegh Corrach, although Mannerheim still has not released a statement about his decision of moving from the Beda Fromm Forns. He has, however, released that he does plan to move to an international team if given the chance, and after his playing in the World Cup XXV he might just have that chance. However, if not, he's expected to take the Corrach's offer and move from Beda Fromm, although nothing can be truly assumed. Nonetheless, the news has sent shcokwaves through the management and ownership of Beda Fromm and they are putting together a counter offer to insist that Mannerheim stay with the team. The issue is further complicated by the fact that the National Soccer Association does not have any rules that restrict players and set terms for the 'ownership' of said player, and this allows for most players to run free, even under contract, although most contracts now explicitly state massive payment decreased if the contract is broken, and new contracts also set in stone that players cannot change teams before the contract is over with - unfortunately for the Forns, this was not the case when they signed the contract over to Otto Mannerheim.

His home career in hiatus due to his participation in the World Cup, we hope great things from this twenty-two year old rising star, and he's already the top scorer of the team.

2-1 defeat shock defeat to the Macabees! Are we cursed?

There are many questions coming from this defeat: Why can't the Macabees play so well more? Why are such a skilled team so erratic? Why can't Cuation match up despite being champions of the Baptisim of Fire this year? Are Cuation cursed against the Macabee's?

Certainly the team played better then the last game between the two sides but once more, only after the match was beyond the reach. Perhaps Cuation side was overconfident or perhaps it was the changes. Overun till the formation was switched to the normal 4-5-1, Rual and Stanly failed to take the chance of their start.

Stantly is unfortunate that the team was only made recently for his prime has passed but he still has the skills to take on the best however he tries easily and is too easy to outpace which limits him. His refusal to go inside hurt the shape of the team and in the end, Leslie Butcher found himself under too much pressure till Heskey Anderton came on. Crosses wasted due to lack of options in the back and expirence plus skills best coming from the bench

Rual entered the match as the top goalscorer after five apperances from the bench but he failed to gell with Peter. Well marked and easily cuaght offside, Rual couldn't get chances. When crosses came in, he was unable to reach them due to lack of height. Replaced as Cuation fought their way back into the match, his pace is best used against tired legs.

Roy Fergusons combative style was missed till he came on and helped to turn the tide, old and bad tempered as he can be, he aids boith the defence and attack, keeping the shape of the team.

Heskey Anderton will perhaps get the support of the fans and critics that he deserves now. His ability in the air was missed as was his selfless team work, assisting Leslie Butcher throughout the Baptisim of Fire. May be no left winger but the team can rely on him.

Match

Both teams started with purpose, Cuation to avenge their only defeat and the Macabees to prove themselves in what was expected to be an even game. From the start however, with no player linking Abel and Goivanni, the left side of the team unable to make an offensive impact and Rual constantly failing to find space, the Macabees took advantage, dominating the first half.

When Peter is instructed to stay up feild but three other players, Stantly, Rual and Giovanni, the defensive effort was comprimised, poor Leslie outnumbered. Fortunatly Gary' sweeping style and the defensivly sound centre held the Macabees at bay till the twenty fifth minute

Otto Mannerheim was once more cuasing the defence lots of problems, this time drifting outside the area, away from his marker and into space. His shot from outside the box was unstoppable, Gary Jen's dive little more then a token effort.

0-1

Cuation struggled with Jude watching on in frustration as Rual kept going offside, the team looked confused and unable to string anything togther. Somehow the Macabees didn't score again till near half time, a low cross from the left, evading both centre backs and Gary Jens, giving Froemer Paulus an easy finish

Comg off at half time, it was clear the team had to buck up its ideas and thanks to Igor's words in the dressing room and the amazing support, the team flew out of the blocks. Rual kicked off and played it to Stanlly, the old man dribbling his way into space before hitting an early cross for Peter Tanner.

Tanner knocked it into the run of Giovanni, the playmaker taking on his marker and anyone who came near, finally bursting into the area before pulling it back for Timothy Ashton to blast a powerful effot into the net, to pull a vital goal back and so nearly break the net.

From that moment on, Cuation had the momentum and started pushing the Macabees back but still the team looked flimsy, vunrable and unlikly to pull a goal back. In the fifty fith minute Rual and Stanly where pulled off for Heskey and Roy, the team switching to a 4-5-1.

Now they looked much stronger and would spend the rest of the match pushing for an equaliser, Abel Robinson rested in the 70th minute for Rio Samaba. However due to Derik Vander, good defending and some bad luck like Heskey slipping when well placed, Cuation where unable to claim a draw.