NationStates Jolt Archive

Presenting the XIVth edition of the Don Cherry Cup, hosted by...who? what? you're kidding! um...Very Angry Rabbits

Participants
Kalaallit Nunaat - Iceberg colors are red and white
Hockey Canada - Flyers Logo (http://www.onlinesports.com/images/jhd-nhl-flyers.jpg) - Home Jersey (http://mypage.bluewin.ch/nhl-shirt/...Flyers_home.jpg) - Away Jersey (http://www.sportsdepot.com/images/awayflyers.gif)
Vtorbetin
Oliverry colors are green, blue and red (http://membres.lycos.fr/lhjmq2004/Image1.png), alternate jersey (http://membres.lycos.fr/lhjmq2004/Image2.png)
Very Angry Rabbits - Artic Hares colors are white with green trim and red piping
Vilita - Ice Cats colors are orange and teal
Starblaydia - Rayzors colors are purple (and more purple) (http://www.starblaydestudios.co.uk/Images/CCKit.jpg)
Spruitland – Ice Bunnies colors are lime green with red trim, and a little black bunny (http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/SPRhockeykit.jpg)
Robotopolis - Synthos colors are Dr, Wily. Robotopolis Synthos' Team Logo (http://www.aaroncity.com/kanjiri/drwlogo.gif)
Squornshelous - Ferrets colors are black and red (http://img.photobucket.com/albums/v629/squorn/squornshelous.jpg)
Chicanada - Kodiaks colors are red, blue and gold
Krytenia – Aces
Harlesburg - Blades
Iansisle - Gulls colors are white, orange and blue (http://www.sandiegomag.com/issues/february00/images/gulls.jpg)
Kericia – Seagulls colors are blue and white
Druida - Lightning colors are brown, dark brown, and yellow (http://i2.photobucket.com/albums/y2/NEWI/cherrykits.bmp)
Euroslavia - Phantoms colors are black and red
Liverpool England - Ice Terminators colors are red, yellow and blue
Tanah Burung - Cassowaries Current Champions --- and --- ranbked # 1! colors are yellow, black and red
Corneliu - Penguins colors are black and gold
Formal Dances - Waltzers
Tonissia
The Gulf States
Fmjphoenix - Blades colors are green and blue
Lovisa - Polish Bisons colors are dark blue, white, and blue
Daistallia 2104 - Gold Coins
The South Packerlands
Hypocria - Huskies colors are blue and white
Bettia - Icebergs colors are green and yellow
Poppuli - colors are red and brown
Bipedal Apes
The Mushroom Kingship - The Flying Goombas
Bedistan


History of The Don Cherry Cup
The Don Cherry Cup was founded by Kalaallit Nunaat to provide an arena for an NS Ice Hockey tournament, recognizing excellence in the sport, and a forum for a bunch of fun.

Past Champions
Cherry Cup 1: SterlingIce
Cherry Cup 2: Soviet Haaregrad
Cherry Cup 3: Tranquillitis
Cherry Cup 4: Eizen
Cherry Cup 5: Starblaydia
Cherry Cup 6: Tanah Burung
Cherry Cup 7: Iansisle
Cherry Cup 8: Starblaydia
Cherry Cup 9: Oliverry
Cherry Cup 10: Kalaallit Nunaat
Cherry Cup 11: Robotopolis
Cherry Cup 12: Robotopolis
Cherry Cup 13: Tanah Burung

Past Hosts
Cherry Cup 1: Kalaallit Nunaat
Cherry Cup 2: Kalaallit Nunaat
Cherry Cup 3: Kaze Progressa
Cherry Cup 4: The Belmore Family
Cherry Cup 5: The Gulf States
Cherry Cup 6: Squornshelous
Cherry Cup 7: Liverpool England
Cherry Cup 8: Iansisle
Cherry Cup 9: Oliverry
Cherry Cup 10: Tanah Burung
Cherry Cup 11: Chicanada
Cherry Cup 12: Iansisle
Cherry Cup 13: Hockey Canada

Additional information as it develops...

...popluar?... :rolleyes:

Just for the record, The Gulf States nickname is the "Peliceans" and our colours are blue and white.

I'll RP a little later.

"Where?" Bi Kikere was furious. She'd just presided over a war, a successful Cherry Cup title, and was heading into an election campaign, where she hoped to move up from people's representative for territorial defence & sports to the top spot.

"Where?" she sputtered, flecks of old-lady spit flying everywhere.

"Very Angry Rabbits," the faceless emissary told her.

"Outrageous. Food items should not compete in sporting tournaments."

"But what about--"

"Silence. Tell them we threaten to put extra beer in the rabbit stew this year."

---

Cassowaries starting line-up (yeah, we know, but the sports ministrry seems to think this is football):

Goal - Martina
Left Defence - Octavianus
Right Defence - Aloysius
Right Wing - Tarantula
Centre - Delores Onion
Left Wing - Paddy Noire

Coach - Sister Hale Maria, Deaconess of the Church of the Slaughtered Dwarf

The Armed and Dangerous Warren of
Very Angry Rabbits
Department of Cold Cuts and Cold Sports
Office of the Chair
Committee for Cherry Cup XIV
Save the Dust Bunny Twelve

Memorandum for: Sporting Divisions, Departments, Ministries, Bureaus, Sections, Branches, Sectors, Agencies, What-Have-You of the Don Cherry Cup XIV Participating Nations

Subject: Organization of Don Cherry Cup XIV, et al

Gentlemen, Ladies, Dwarves, Various Fauna, Other:

It gives me great pleasure to welcome you to the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits for the XIVth iteration of the sport of Ice Hockey’s Don Cherry Cup! Well, most of you, anyway…

First, a few words of warning.

1. Don’t touch the red buttons you will find on light posts, about 5 feet up, on various street corners. Just don’t do it. Not ever. It is not pleasant to find oneself trussed up in a dark, dank cellar blindfolded, hungry, and being forced to listen to Barry Manilow for hours on end. Refrain from touching these red buttons and everything will be fine.

2. Do not go into a restaurant and order Hasenpfeffer. Or any other rabbit-related food item.

3. Keep your hands and arms inside the bus at all times. Follow the yellow line. Do NOT transfer to the blue line.

4. Do not wear plaid. It is a capital offense in Very Angry Rabbits to wear plaid without a license.

Now, to business. There are 33 participants in Cherry Cup XIV, who will be divided into three divisions (the First Armored Division, the Third Airborne Division, and the Seventeenth Mechanized Infantry Division) of 11 in each group. Divisional play will consist of 11 gamedays – each team will play 10 games, and have 1 “bye”. At the end of divisional play, the top 4 teams in each division will advance to the Semi-Finals.

Semi-Final play will find the 12 advancing teams divided into 2 Groups – Group 1 and Group B – 6 to a group. Group 1 will consists of the top team from each Division, and the 4th team from each Division. Group B will consist of teams 2 and 3 from each division. Each team in each group will play every other team once – 5 gamedays. The top two teams in each Group will advance to the “Nearly-Finals”.

The Nearly-Finals will consist of the top two teams from each Group playing each other once – 3 gamedays. The two teams with that come out on top will play each other in the Finals for Champion and Second Place. The other two teams will play a consolation match for 3rd place and an all expenses paid trip to the other side of the rink.

As to the officials – we have gathered together a respectable group of officials from around the world, some of whom have actually officiated at a hockey match, and many of whom have watched one. These officials will be collectively known as the “Dice”, and will provide on-ice guidance and bandages, as well as provide the official final result at the end of the game.

Throughout the tournament, the game will consist of the usual three periods, with a single overtime period should the game be tied (drawn) at the end of the third period. If the game remains tied at the end of the overtime period, it will officially be recorded as a draw. In the event of a draw in the Finals, a shoot out will take place. In the event that a “tie-breaker” is needed to determine which of two or more teams with exactly the same record move forward, goal-differential will be used. Should that not provide a final result, the two sides will move onto the ice, and have a shoot-out.

Decisions of the “Dice” are final in all matches. Official Protests will be accepted at the end of any game by the VAR officials on hand, and will be accorded due attention, reviewed, discussed, and discarded.

As the result of a Random Drawing, conducted by the Ghost of Anita Brake, the Divisions for Cherry Cup XIV play are (in absolutely no particular order – numbers assigned are divisional numbers for the purpose of deciding who the heck plays who on a given day):

1st Armored Division:
1 - Kalaallit Nunaat
2 - Vtorbetin
3 - Kericia
4 - Lovisa
5 - Bedistan
6 - Starblaydia
7 – Euroslavia
8 – Oliverry
9 – Iansisle
10 – Fmjphoenix
11 – Very Angry Rabbits

3rd Airborne Division
1 - Tanah Burung (ranbked 1st)
2 - Hypocria
3 - Robotopolis
4 - Chicanada
5 - Bidpedal Apes
6 – Harlesburg with a “u”
7 – The Mushroom Kingship
8 – Hockey Canada
9 – Liverpool England
10 – Tonissia
11 – The South Packerlands


17th Mechanized Infantry Division
1 – Squornshelous
2 – Krytenia
3 – Formal Dances
4 – Druida
5 – Poppuli
6 – The Gulf States
7 – Vilita
8 – Spruitland
9 - Corneliu
10 – Daistallia 2104
11 - Bettia

The rotation of games will be as follows for Divisional Play will be announced later today – Otto is having some serious matrix problems, so we’ve rented the movie, and will force him to watch it until this thing is resolved.

Venues will be posted as soon as we finish building…er…deciding which ones are most appropriate.

Please submit your team rosters to the Very Angry Rabbits Commission for Omission as soon as possible.

Thank you, and we hope you all (well, most of you) enjoy your stay in Very Angry Rabbits.

Don’t you touch that red button!

With Respect (well…for most of you),
Ruppert
The Incompetent
Etc.

------------------------------------
Post Script
Otto, screaming "No more! No more! I shall be seeing the world as through a green glass forever more! Stop!" handed a slip of paper to Ruppert the Incompetent, and sat down in the middle of the floor, put his face in his hands, and wept silently.

The slip of paper said:

Divisional Play Schedule, Cherry Cup XIV
Day 1: 1 v 2, 3 v 4, 5 v 6, 7 v 8, 9 v 10, 11-bye
Day 2: 1 v 11, 3 v 2, 5 v 4, 7 v 6, 9 v 8, 10-bye
Day 3: 1 v 8, 3 v 11, 5 v 2, 7 v 4, 10 v 6, 9-bye
Day 4: 1 v 4, 3 v 6, 5 v 10, 7 v 11, 9 v 2, 8-bye
Day 5: 1 v 3, 4 v 6, 5 v 8, 10 v 2, 9 v 11, 7-bye
Day 6: 1 v 10, 3 v 9, 5 v 7, 11 v 4, 2 v 8, 6-bye
Day 7: 1 v 6, 3 v 10, 8 v 11, 7 v 2, 9 v 4, 5-bye
Day 8: 1 v 5, 3 v 7, 8 v 10, 11 v 2, 9 v 6, 4-bye
Day 9: 1 v 9, 4 v 2, 5 v 11, 7 v 10, 6 v 8, 3-bye
Day 10: 1 v 7, 3 v 8, 5 v 9, 6 v 11, 10 v 4, 2-bye
Day 11: 2 v 6, 3 v 5, 4 v 8, 7 v 9, 10 v 11, 1-bye

------------------------------------------------
ooc: Scores for gameday 1 will be posted this weekend - either late Saturday or early Sunday VAR time - which happens to coincide with the time on the east coast of the United States. This will give everyone some time to do some Pre-Cup RPs - and coincidentally get me thorugh the high school graduation / party of my youngest son.

The "schedule" I will try to follow will be to post about 2 sets of game results every three days (no, NOT simultaneously) giving folks time to RP and at the same time trying to keep the thing from dragging.

Teams will earn 3 points for a win in regulation, 2 points for a win in overtime (including shoot-outs if necessary) and 1 point for games that end in a draw.

In case someone missed it - scores will be generated by random rolls of dice. There will be no advantage given for rank (or, as they say in Tanah Burung, "ranbk". There will be no RP bonus. We RP because it's fun, right?

When I make a humongous error (which, lord knows, will occur) please point it out to me as gently as possible (well, all right - but there will be no firing squads),

If something comes up that I haven't covered here, I fully intend to wing it.

Okay, now, everyone back to their corners, and come out swinging when the bell rings.

4. Do not wear plaid. It is a capital offense in Very Angry Rabbits to wear plaid without a license.

"Hmm," said Gulls fan, Unofficial Team Historian, Official Avenging Arm of the Gulls, and honorary Doctor of Punology Throckmorten Alabaster. He scratched a chin that bore many, many deep axe wounds. "I wonder how one goes about getting a license?"

NOTICE and ANNOUNCEMENT

Queries have been lodged with the Department of Underwriting, Licensing, Licorice, and Licentiousness regarding methodology and procedures to be used in applying for certain licenses, permits, authorizations - to whit, "Plaid, Wear Of".

The procedures are fairly simple. Acquire VAR Form PWO 2 version 7 (with amendments 1 through 4), complete the form in triplicate, and file (with completed supplemental VAR Form PWO-Foreign National, notarized) at the DULLL Office in Edgeburrow, located at Hasse Strasse Ocht und Dreizig.

Applications are accepted between the hours of 10:00 and 10:01 every third Thursday in months that have a "Y" in them during alternate leap years. You must bring with you a sample of the plaid you are applying to wear, and three fashion references, at least one of which must be from a VAR national and one from someone who actually has some fashion sense and wouldn't be caught dead in plaid.

A filing fee of 7,000 guilders in the form of a certified check must accompany all applications, together with a licensing fee of 5,000 guilders.

Applications will be reviewed by the Review Board, and provided within the month to the Chair-Hare for a decision. All decisions will be rendered in no more than a decade, and are final.

Bribes, although strongly discouraged, have been known to facilitate these procedures.

RBA Foreign Ministry press release for Trans-border consumption

All upright-walking citizens of evolved Republic of Bipedal Apes anticipate with great excitement beginning of esteemed Don Cherry Cup of Hockey Greatness. Recruitment of players for new and unusual sport of hockeyball, reportedly played by hitting ball with icicles while swimming in shallow water, has begun. Although sport is not regularly played on veldt or in Bipedaleen rainforests, many youthful and enthusiastic apes have come forward to try out for side.

Selections thus far (as determined by Bipedaleen University faculty of strange and experimental sports):

Goalkeeper: Longisquama
Defender (left): Okrawawa
Defender (right): Palsmorton (male)
Forward (left): Banagras
Forward (center): Beetlcrunch
Forward (right): Gadzooing

Coach: Ms. Blatvart, Assistant Professor of Watersports, B.U.

"...desperately needed for the overall enjoyability of the game."

"Thank you, Carl - I now propose that we send this motion to a vote."

"I second the motion, sir."

"Excellent. All in favor please press the green buttons on your desk. All against please press the red buttons." The Bedistani Minister of Sports waited a moment while results were electronically tabulated. "And so the motion to allocate funding for tiddlywinks training for the players of Rolestu Football Club in the event that they should lose their Champions League match is carried by seventy-three votes to twenty-seven." The dissenting voters solemnly shook their heads, thinking what has this place come to?

"All right, David, what's our next order of business?"

"To finalize our roster for Cherry Cup XIV, sir."

"Do what?"

"Finalize our roster for Cherry Cup XIV," David repeated.

"Since when were we in the Cherry Cup?"

Bedistan's Sub-Minister of Sports, International Division calmly stood up. "Since yesterday, sir - I signed us up."

"Isn't the Cherry Cup an ice hockey tournament?"

"Yes..."

"Do we have any suitable ice hockey training facilites in Bedistan?"

"No..."

"Then what the devil were you thinking?"

"Um, well..."

"All right, everyone, call your friends. See if you can find a dozen or so people who wouldn't mind getting trashed in the name of Bedistan."

They worked long and hard, well into the night, but eventually they did find some people...

-----

The Bedistan Porcupines - Cherry Cup XIV - Roster

Goal - Brian Wetland
Left Defense - Albert Yost
Right Defense - William Franken
Left Wing - Chris Eriksson
Right Wing - Aaron Finnigan
Center - Fred Davenport

Substitutes
Goal - Rick Dawson
Left Defense - Quincy Ryan
Right Defense - Sebastian McMann
Left Wing - Per Martinsson
Right Wing - Torsten Sullivan
Center - Barry Jones

Fmjphoenix Blades

Goalkeepers:
#88 Breggan Voltlander - Starter
#00 Frando Kluckie - Substitute
#12 Devall Uryla - Reserve

Defenders:
#43 Howard Kaylay - 1st line
#98 Royal Denyals - 1st line
#65 Ramon Feylia - 2nd line
#11 Kell Doran - 2nd line
#49 Charels McLauren - 3rd line
#05 Jeremy Owens - 3rd line

Right Wingers:
#24 Daryl Brown - 1st line
#03 Forlien Clowlen - 2nd line
#28 Xavior Vega - 3rd line
#67 Betred Salim - 4th line

Left Wingers:
#22 Paul Farlan - 1st line
#87 Ariel Boyten - 2nd line
#42 Stephen Davis - 3rd line
#14 Bobby Kalunia - 4th line

Centers:
#30 Keith Roneck - 1st line(C)
#40 Gerald Howard - 2nd line
#95 Larry Ferando - 3rd line
#35 Branden Lowell - 4th line

Home jerseys - Green with blue trim on the sides, numbers written in white outlined blue
Away jerseys - Blue with green trim on the sides, numbers written in white outlined green

Tonissia


Goalkeepers:
#33 Doug Hopkins - Starter
#14 Leo Free - Substitute
#9 Ukov Jones - Reserve

Defenders:
#5 Ben Oble - 1st line
#8 Zander Conway - 1st line
#1 Jeff Jones - 2nd line
#76 Daniels Zann - 2nd line
#44 Chance Hudderby - 3rd line
#2 Klay Dubarr- 3rd line

Right Wingers:
#11 HopJohn Judd - 1st line
#16 Klaus Graf - 2nd line
#53 Tony Hill - 3rd line
#23 Joel Iyon - 4th line

Left Wingers:
#90 Junie Dunleavy - 1st line (C)
#15 Mikola Hizov- 2nd line
#22 Dan Stoddard - 3rd line
#84 Bruce Wibber - 4th line

Centers:
#99 Kevin Hobbs- 1st line
#21 Heinz Graf - 2nd line
#36 Eddy Edison - 3rd line
#10 Rich Hokkon JR - 4th line

When he received the letter(in the airplane), Jean-Francois Larache shouted: "What red button? What fucking red buttton is he talking about?"
One of the players answered: "Err. coach, read carefully and you'll understand..."
The coach then re-read the paragraph and understands. But, he says: "I love to listen to Barry Manilow. Anyway, these are just fucking bastards. We don't need them as a host. I don't trust their referees. Dice. That's not a name for this. Come on."

As the coach was shouting, the players were listening and laughing to the coach. When the coach knew that the players were listening to him, he said: "Fucking bastards. What are you doing there. Do back to your seat because if you don't, I will rent a one-star motel room."

The players and the coach calmed down

Considered this tag. I'll come up with an RP.

"...back to your seat because if you don't, I will rent a one-star motel room."

The players and the coach calmed downAccommodations

The following locations in and around Edgeburrow have reserved space to accommodate the staff and teams for Cherry Cup XIV:

Peters' Burrow
Warens' (you saw this coming) Warren
Brer Rabbits Briar Patch
Watership Down
The Sands literally
The Hutch
Rabbit Run

Customs and Immigration Officers at all ports of entry have been provided strip maps to these locations - arriving teams need only ask.

OOC: What are the rankings as of Cherry Cup XIII? I need to update my sig.

ooc: Scores for gameday 1 will be posted this weekend - either late Saturday or early Sunday VAR time - which happens to coincide with the time on the east coast of the United States. This will give everyone some time to do some Pre-Cup RPs - and coincidentally get me thorugh the high school graduation / party of my youngest son.

The "schedule" I will try to follow will be to post about 2 sets of game results every three days (no, NOT simultaneously) giving folks time to RP and at the same time trying to keep the thing from dragging.

Teams will earn 3 points for a win in regulation, 2 points for a win in overtime (including shoot-outs if necessary) and 1 point for games that end in a draw.

In case someone missed it - scores will be generated by random rolls of dice. There will be no advantage given for rank (or, as they say in Tanah Burung, "ranbk". There will be no RP bonus. We RP because it's fun, right?

When I make a humongous error (which, lord knows, will occur) please point it out to me as gently as possible (well, all right - but there will be no firing squads),

If something comes up that I haven't covered here, I fully intend to wing it.

Okay, now, everyone back to their corners, and come out swinging when the bell rings.

Divisional Play Schedule, Cherry Cup XIV
Day 1: 1 v 2, 3 v 4, 5 v 6, 7 v 8, 9 v 10, 11-bye
Day 2: 1 v 11, 3 v 2, 5 v 4, 7 v 6, 9 v 8, 10-bye
Day 3: 1 v 8, 3 v 11, 5 v 2, 7 v 4, 10 v 6, 9-bye
Day 4: 1 v 4, 3 v 6, 5 v 10, 7 v 11, 9 v 2, 8-bye
Day 5: 1 v 3, 4 v 6, 5 v 8, 10 v 2, 9 v 11, 7-bye
Day 6: 1 v 10, 3 v 9, 5 v 7, 11 v 4, 2 v 8, 6-bye
Day 7: 1 v 6, 3 v 10, 8 v 11, 7 v 2, 9 v 4, 5-bye
Day 8: 1 v 5, 3 v 7, 8 v 10, 11 v 2, 9 v 6, 4-bye
Day 9: 1 v 9, 4 v 2, 5 v 11, 7 v 10, 6 v 8, 3-bye
Day 10: 1 v 7, 3 v 8, 5 v 9, 6 v 11, 10 v 4, 2-bye
Day 11: 2 v 6, 3 v 5, 4 v 8, 7 v 9, 10 v 11, 1-bye

The Squornshelous Department of Very Long Posts Presents:

Stuff!!!!

Ferrets in 17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Lots of familiar faces, we might be playing another sport. Squornshelous has played against many of their current Cherry Cup opponents in the World Cup. In fact, Squornshelous and Krytenia are in the same World Cup Qualifying Group right now. On the whole, it looks like a great group to crash and burn in, with such teams as Druida, The Gulf States, Vilita Formal Dances and Krytenia. The only games that the ferrets wwill have to make a big effort in to lose will be against Poppuli, and possibly Bettia.

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
1 – Squornshelous
2 – Krytenia
3 – Formal Dances
4 – Druida
5 – Poppuli
6 – The Gulf States
7 – Vilita
8 – Spruitland
9 - Corneliu
10 – Daistallia 2104
11 - Bettia

Squornshelous' Divisional Play Schedule:
wins draws losses bye
Day 1: Squornshelous v Krytenia
Day 2: Squornshelous v Bettia
Day 3: Squornshelous v Spruitland
Day 4: Squornshelous v Druida
Day 5: Squornshelous v Formal Dances
Day 6: Squornshelous v Daistallia 2104
Day 7: Squornshelous v The Gulf States
Day 8: Squornshelous v Poppuli
Day 9: Squornshelous v Corneliu
Day 10: Squornshelous v Vilita
Day 11: bye

Retired Players From Cherry Cup 13:

1 C Pavel Kasparov 1 36 Vogsphere Imperials
2 RW Andrey Gorvich 1 39 Xaxis Firebirds
32 GK Viktor Orlov - 38 Vogsphere Imperials


Squornshelous Ferrets Roster:

# Pos Name Line Age Club
3 GK Markus Dornier - 21 Vogsphere Imperials
6 RW Arne Rassmussen 3 28 Margrathea Slartibartfasts
7 C Jeff Noonan 3 30 Poghrill Tribe
11 D Vanislav Polovski 2 26 Milliway Prophets
14 C Pavel Dukov 1 31 Xaxis Firebirds
21 RW Jason O'Connor 4 23 Vogsphere Imperials
22 LW Jan Baros 3 23 Stavromula Blades
31 D Bjorn Rasmussen 1 35 Blerontia Demons
33 D Ahmed Hakim 2 29 Fallia Crocodiles
36 D Krog Dugsk 3 37 Damogran Trogdors
43 LW Igor Petchukov 1 31 Striterax Knights
45 D Nick O'Connor 4 27 Striterax Knights
51 C Nicola Pablicosta 2 24 Golgafrincham Marauders
52 D Wet Biscuit MacGlee 3 38 Damogran Trogdors
61 LW Ilya Chuko 1 30 Xaxis Firebirds
67 LW Janni Titov 4 25 Traal Bugblatters
81 D Adolf Netbers 1 33 Santraginus Sharks
82 RW Rudolf Karlson 2 28 Yassacca Foresters
84 RW Petr Zarik 2 34 Stavromula Blades
90 GK Miika Svenson - 32 Santraginus Sharks
91 C Arnold Friedel 4 22 Algolia Suntigers
99 D Hrolf Olafson 4 24 Golgafrincham Marauders

OOC: What are the rankings as of Cherry Cup XIII? I need to update my sig.That, my friend, is an interesting question. I have no clue. This will not slow down the start of CC XIV, as rank will not play into results.

However, it would be nice to know. If someone has some time, and wouldn't mind doing it, what needs to be done is charts of the CC XIII results, and then ranks can be determined.

Except for TB - who we all already know is ranbked # 1...;)

The Squornshelous Department of Very Long Posts Presents:

Stuff!!!!
...here followed, in the original...well...stuff...
The Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits Commission on Sports met hastily, but deliberated long and seriously, on the issue at hand. There were a variety of well thought out arguments, a lively debate, and several fist-fights.

In the end, it was decided that stuff was allowed.

The Corneliu Penquins arrived at the airport with sticks in hand and skates over their soldiers. What is different about this team is that they are soldiers in the Colonial Military of The Armed Galatic Empire of Corneliu. They got off the plane and formed ranks with their coach watching. In unison, they marched into the airport and proceeded to baggage claim to get their bags. When that was accomplished, they proceeded to their hotel and a small press conference.

At the Press Conference the coach got behind the microphone and started.

"Allow me to introduce myself. I am General Robert Jones of the Colonial Army of the Armed Galatic Empire of Corneliu. I am replacing the last coach of this team because of their poor performance. That won't happen with this new team. I will introduce you to them.

Our Goalies are:
1st Lt. Greg Mitchell
SSGT Michael Lawrence

Our Defensemen:

Pvt Tim Russel
Spc Nicholas Coleman
Spc Cordel Jones
Sgt Kevin Anderson
PFC Robert Duncan
W.O. Peter Samford
W.O. Fred Clinton
SSGT Eric Clark

Our Wingmen:

1st Lt. Jason Kendell
2nd Lt. David Sanders
Capt Aaron Bell
2nd Lt Brian Thomspon
1st Lt Thomas Sheridan
Capt Lawrence Adams
1st Lt Alexander Walker
2nd Lt. Samuel Stenson

Our Centers:

Capt Thomas Tribet
1st Lt. Cal Alexander
Spc. Jack Wilson
SSGT Daniel Chase

Our Team Captain will be Captain Thomas Tribet and our Assistant Captains are Spc Cordel Jones and SSGT Daniel Chase.

We are a brand new team people. Do we expect to win? Yes. We will put in a better showing than the last team we have sent here. Our national pride is at stake in this Cherry Cup competition and we shall do whatever is necessary to win this tournament.

That is all!"

When he said that, he up and left the conference with the team, not taking any questions. The team proceeded up to their rooms to get settled in for their first game against Daistallia 2104.

ChicanadaSun
Yeah, we like giagantic names.

Kodiaks Gear Up For Bunnies
Forced to leave Jaquee at home, considered a security risk

The new-look and more offensive-playing Chicanadan National Hockey Club will have a mess of talent and a couple of screws loose as the CHC has forced Jaquee Morriseete, the CHL Presidum, to keep her bony rear end in Cana in order to avoid any scandal in the very lovely (as as Jaquee would say, "fuzzy, cuddly and wuvable) Very Angry Rabbits.

Yeah, Jaquee's dreams dashed because she goes bananas. Whoda thought.

Of course, considering that in four days time the Kodiaks will take on the #1 Ranbked Sqaud in all the NS, Tanah Burung, maybe Jaquee can be let in to see her drinking pal Sister Hale Maria (or is it Maria Hale?) just this once. Betters have that at even odds, since most expect the lovely drunkard to make an unexpected appearance anyways, with comical hyjinks to ensue.

Emmerdille O'leaina, the Cheery Cup XV Southampton bid chair, will not be accompanying the team yet, as she's still stuck in Commie Brazil for what has seemed to be forever so someone will host the 2010 (192...um...something) Winter Olympics. Evann Fairmer is expected to be the head delegate for the bid committee, who plan on using its time in the VAR to finalize its own bid for the next cup. As well as participate in said comical hijinks when Jaquee eventually shows up.

The Team is led by Akatoli Coach Gerhard Ensley, as former coach Marsha finally retired from Atens and is off to coach the Sani university club teams. Most of the players come from old-school clubs or Colonia, who is having a breakout year in the recently reorganized CHL.

The team is in the 3rd Airborne Division with some tough teams, including that damn team who beat the KodiFooty club yesterday. It's best to assume the Kodiaks will be out for some cold revenge. We also get the last three CC winners in TB as well as Robotopolis, who's collapse in Hockey Canada (who we also get) was legendary. Also expected to challenge is the always crazy Tonissa, the stubborn Liverpool England (who the Kodiaks already beat once in Iansisle), The Mushroom Kingship (and lets just watch them play HC for fun) as well as Harlesburg. There is ponderance over the Bipedal Apes and South Packlanders, as they are very new and not yet on resident Page 4 Bunny H'kol's radar.

H'kol will be in the VAR reporting for CityTV (who won hosting rights over Northern) this year.

Kodiaks grand Schedule for CCXIV

Day 1: v Robotopolis
Day 2: v Bipedal Apes
Day 3: v The Mushroom Kingship
Day 4: v Tanah Burung
Day 5: v Harlesburg
Day 6: v The South Packerlands
Day 7: v Liverpool England
Day 8: off date
Day 9: v Hypocria
Day 10: v Tonissa
Day 11: v Hockey Canada

*Roster up later*

The Spruitland Ice Bunnies return for their second Cherry Cup, and are pleased the temperature in the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits is a bit more pleasurable than in Hockey Canada.

The team is exactly the same as it was for Cherry Cup XIII. It took some serious convincing to get some of the players to come along again though, and promises of exciting bus rides and as many red buttons to push as they could dream of had to be made.


The Spruitland Ice Bunnies

Coach: Coach

GK Ludovic Robins
GK Julien Karoot

D Pjotr Zamboni
D Karl Mellick
D Jean Oorweeg
D Wouter Luidt
D Sven Huberts
D Ludo Keersmaeckers
D Frank Zandt

L Marino Poirot
L Johan Bronkhorst
L Bengt Jonson
L Ferdi Schtrumpf

C André Vermeylen
C Stijn Moereels
C Pär Lange
C Aren Kiersted
C Danny De Ceuster

R Louis Dardenne
R Hadar Vibbard
R Rudy Smets
R Frey Kirby
R Donald Vervoort

Team Kit:

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/SPRhockeykit.jpg

OOC Why Do I have to be paired with My Puppets :mad:

Caint Wait For the TMK/Tonissia Match up: Gophers Trying to hump my players while they do the Numa Numa,not to mention the leftover Limburger Smell :p

Line 1
Left Forward- Richard Fischer (27 G, 14 A*)
Center- Kailash "Picture Perfect Pass" Holmes (2 G, 38 A*)<captain
Right Forward- David Davids (12 G, 9 A *)

Line 2
Left Forward- Thomas Shurman (21 G, 12 A *)
Center- Jackson Willow (12 G, 6 A*)
Right Forward- William Springbrook (37 G, 4 A*)

Line 3
Left Forward- Ray Savage (10 G, 5 A*)
Center- Ross Marchant (17 G, 10 A*)
Right Forward- Kyle Everhart (26 G, 2 A*)

Line 4
Left Forward- Gabriel O`Keife (Did Not Play, injured)
Center- John Overman (7 G, 15 A*)
Right Wing- Neil Lanther (9 G, 9 A*)

Defensive Pairing 1
Right- Christofer Langden (+12*)
Left- Eric Luterman (+14*)

Defensive Pairing 2
Right- Troy Thurston (+4*)
Left- Jay Hefterson (+5*)

Defensive Pairing 3
Right- Staney Hayden (+1*)
Left- Joger Elenbogel (+2*) [be nice to him, he's handi-capped and is in a hospital bed (he's also the moronic coach's strategy, don't be supprised to see him get 60 minutes of hockey a night)]

Goalies
Starting in Net- James Stilman (1.18 GAA, 29-7 W-L*)
Backup- Alex Mason (1.34 GAA, 20-16*)
*= Played In NPHA, only players with an All-Stars Game Appearence Qualified for Try-outsLibera Terra Populi Praetorian Cohorts
---------------------------

The Daistallian team arrives, accompanied by a number of fans. Coach Goldenes submits the following roster:

Team colors are silver and gold.
The current team roster:
5 Erik Plien (Center)
4 Hien Shu (Center)
18 Heinz Mann (Center)
2 Wolfgang Grimm (Wing)
3 Maus Daek (Wing)
7 Walter Heinz (Wing)
8 Da-wa Lha-mo (Wing)
10 Jon Silber (Wing)
22 Dzi-mi Lha-mo (Wing)
25 Krieg Munze(Wing)
6 Bae Stall (Defense)
9 Wen Huek (Defense)
11 Hans Gruber (Defense)
12 Stien (Defense)
13 Hu Mi (Defense)
16 Kae Mar (Defense)
17 Meister Jaeger (Defense)
19 Hans Fet (Goalie)
21 Erik Viking (Goalie)
24 Jen Jaeger (Goalie)

Inactive list:
20 Vael Kari (Center)
1 Hae Yu (Wing)
14 Wi Rok (Defense)
15 Oliver Daes (Defense)
23 Franz Schlager (Goalie)

Head Coach: Adolf Goldenes
Assistant Coach: Silber Munzen


A number of Daistallian fans promtly get lost on their way to their lodgings - and transfer to the blue line.

Bettia Enlightener: 24th June 2005 - how do they do it?

Icebergs, Dead Ahead!

It's been a hectic few months for the country of Bettia. Not content with belly-flopping onto the NS footballing scene and starting the BLOG (Bettian League Of Gridiron - see the Wiki for more details), we are now gracing the rink in an attempt to play ice hockey.

Our beloved Icebergs, bearing the national colours of green and yellow, have been drawn in the 17th Mechanised (with a Z) Infantry Division against some familiar and not-so-familiar names.

Matchday 7 sees us face off against Spruitland, an island just a bunny hop across the water from our fair land (of course these days you can just take the train through the Southward Ho!-Fonstown tunnel). Other regional rivals are Vilita (day 4), Druida (day 6) and Krytenia (day 8).

Bettia's group schedule is:

Day 1: bye
Day 2: Squornshelous v Bettia
Day 3: Formal Dances v Bettia
Day 4: Vilita v Bettia
Day 5: Corneliu v Bettia
Day 6: Bettia v Druida
Day 7: Spruitland v Bettia
Day 8: Bettia v Krytenia
Day 9: Poppuli v Bettia
Day 10: The Gulf States v Bettia
Day 11: Daistallia 2104 v Bettia

So who will be pulling on the green and yellow jersey?

CENTRES:
12. Phil Canton
08. Ikrima Thruxton
46. Llifon Evans
51. Dave Phillips
87. Omar Rajab
19. Phil Hill

LEFT WING:
17. Jon Phillips
65. Hefin George
05. Nathan Foulkes
54. Chris Beckton
38. Neil Rice

RIGHT WING:
16. Warren Alexander
77. Guto Al-Shamari
76. Jason Anwar
11. Amin Ifans
94. Iestyn Knockhill

DEFENCE:
05. Rob Silverstone
04. Jeff Penbray
84. Jason Oulton
44. Jamie Coombe
28. Jason Castle
10. Gwynlon Mihangel
56. Amir Morello

NETMINDERS:
01. Daffydd Clayton
34. Greg Abdullah

OOC Why Do I have to be paired with My Puppets :mad: Sorry - dunno who your puppet is...

Otto Matic has the Artic Hares Roster, below, hand delivered to coach/manager/military attache/religious leader/other-unspecified-high-and-mighty-poobah pf each of the visiting teams. Otto likes the sound of that - "visiting teams". Home court advantage at last!

Well - home rink advantage...

The Arctic Haresof Very Angry Rabbits
prepared to do battle in Cherry Cup XIV
Save the Dust Bunny Twelve

Goalkeepers:
Rumplestiltskin #01 Normal Starting Goalkeeper
Sneezy #199 substitute

Defenders:
1st Defense
Dopey #52
Doc #54
2nd Defense
Sleepy #62
Grumpy #64
3rd Defense
Bashful #72
Happy #74

Right Wingers:
Dasher #80 – 1st line *
Dancer #81 – 2nd line
Donner #82 - 3rd line
Blitzen #83 – 4th line

Left Wingers:
Comet #90 – 1st line
Cupid #91 – 2nd line @
Prancer #92 – 3rd line
Vixen #93 – 4th line

Centers:
Elmo #109– 1st line
Bert #110 – 2nd line
Ernie #111 – 3rd line
Snuffleufagus #112– 4th line

* Captain
@ Alternate Captain

Director of Operations
Sir Otto Matic
Order of the Red Garter
Lord of the Upland Warrens

The Armed and Dangerous Warren of
Very Angry Rabbits
Department of Cold Cuts and Cold Sports
Office of the Chair
Committee for Cherry Cup XIV
Save the Dust Bunny Twelve

Memorandum for: Sporting Divisions, Departments, Ministries, Bureaus, Sections, Branches, Sectors, Agencies, What-Have-You of the Don Cherry Cup XIV Participating Nations

Subject: Venues and Time Slots for Don Cherry Cup XIV

Gentlemen, Ladies, Dwarves, Various Fauna, Other - oh, and those "ranbked" Cassowaries, too:

First, a few reminders.

1. We told you NOT to touch the red buttons on the light posts, on various street corners. But did you listen? Oh, no, big brave hockey players had to go and mess with the red buttons. Are you satisfied now? Wasn't that fun in the dank, damp, dungeon listening to Barry Manilow? Do you know how much trouble it was to get you all out of there? The Old Grey Hare never lets anybody out of there! Listen - just refrain from touching these red buttons any more, and everything will be fine.

2. There have already been several "rabbit-related food item" incidents in Edgeburrow restaurants. Five citizens of Very Angry Rabbits have been...relocated to institutions with, how shall we say this? - "soft" rooms. We ask you again, please do not order any "rabbit-related food items" in our restaurants.

3. We must say, everyone has been keeping their hands and arms inside the bus, and following the yellow line. We congratulate you! But remember, do not, UNDER ANY CIRCUMSTANCES, transfer to the blue line.

4. Several applications for a license to wear plaid have been submitted. Unfortunately, all had to be returned for correction. You MUST include three references. When we say notarized, we do not mean that a musical score should be included. And, for heaven sakes, we were very clear about this - bring a sample of the plaid you wish to wear with you!

Very well. The schedule of games, on a daily basis, has been determined.

The Third Airborne Division will be playing the Breakfast Games. These games will start at 6:00 every morning. We strongly suggest Third Airborne Division teams get to bed early.

The Seventeenth Mechanized Infantry Division will be playing the Lunch Games, which will commence daily at 12:00. What? When do you eat lunch? We don't care when you eat lunch. Eat before the game. Eat after the game. Eat next Tuesday. That's your problem, pal.

The First Armored Division has been selected to play the Dinner Games. 7:30 on the button. No, not the red button! Stay on topic, will you?

All games will be televised. They'll be carried by Radio Free Rabbit as well - as if anyone listens to hockey on the radio - or to Radio Free Rabbit, for that matter.

Venues have been completed...er...selected...I mean, the selection of venues has been completed. Each Division has 5 games each day. These games will be numbered A, 2, C, 4 and Yellow.

Games A will be played on the home ice of Edgeburrows own "Rangers". Nice rink - 45,000 seating capacity. See if you can fill it up, eh?

Games 2 will be played in the national arena, home ice of the Artic Hares. Capacity 32,000.

Games C will be played just outside of Edgeburrow in West Edgeburrow, at the West Edgeburrow Community College "Bullets" home ice - capacity 24,000. Buses have been laid on. It's a 20 minute bus trip, be on time for the bus - it's a long walk, buddy.

Games 4 will be played in VARENA, home ice to Very Angry Rabbits most esteemed institution of higher learning, the Academy of Advanced Burrowing. Capacity 48,000

Yellow Games will be played about 5 kilometers south east of Edgeburrow, where you will find a nice little frozen pond in the marshes that we've constructed some bleachers around, stuck up some lighting, and cleaned up a bit. Capcity about 324 if everybody sits real close to their neighbors - which is encouraged, because we hear it's cold out there, folks.

On the schedule included, the first game listed is Game C, the third game listed is Game A, the fourth game listed is Game 2, the second game listed is the Yellow Game, and the other one (fifth - come on, keep up) is the other one (yes, yes...Game 4).

In the event a team is not on ice 5 minutes before the scheduled start time, they will be deemed to have forfeit. Especially if they're playing the Artic Hares that day.

Questions regarding the schedule, and the venues, should be kept to yourself. However, if you simply can't shut up and follow these simple instructions, you can file a complaint and/or inquiry with any of the VAR officials wandering around - you'll be able to recognize them - they're the rabbits with the green armbands, clipboards, and silly little whistles hanging around their necks.

1st Armored Division:
1 - Kalaallit Nunaat
2 - Vtorbetin
3 - Kericia
4 - Lovisa
5 - Bedistan
6 - Starblaydia
7 – Euroslavia
8 – Oliverry
9 – Iansisle
10 – Fmjphoenix
11 – Very Angry Rabbits

3rd Airborne Division
1 - Tanah Burung (ranbked 1st)
2 - Hypocria
3 - Robotopolis
4 - Chicanada
5 - Bidpedal Apes
6 – Harlesburg with a “u”
7 – The Mushroom Kingship
8 – Hockey Canada
9 – Liverpool England
10 – Tonissia
11 – The South Packerlands


17th Mechanized Infantry Division
1 – Squornshelous
2 – Krytenia
3 – Formal Dances
4 – Druida
5 – Poppuli
6 – The Gulf States
7 – Vilita
8 – Spruitland
9 - Corneliu
10 – Daistallia 2104
11 - Bettia

Divisional Play Schedule, Cherry Cup XIV
Day 1: 1 v 2, 3 v 4, 5 v 6, 7 v 8, 9 v 10, 11-bye
Day 2: 1 v 11, 3 v 2, 5 v 4, 7 v 6, 9 v 8, 10-bye
Day 3: 1 v 8, 3 v 11, 5 v 2, 7 v 4, 10 v 6, 9-bye
Day 4: 1 v 4, 3 v 6, 5 v 10, 7 v 11, 9 v 2, 8-bye
Day 5: 1 v 3, 4 v 6, 5 v 8, 10 v 2, 9 v 11, 7-bye
Day 6: 1 v 10, 3 v 9, 5 v 7, 11 v 4, 2 v 8, 6-bye
Day 7: 1 v 6, 3 v 10, 8 v 11, 7 v 2, 9 v 4, 5-bye
Day 8: 1 v 5, 3 v 7, 8 v 10, 11 v 2, 9 v 6, 4-bye
Day 9: 1 v 9, 4 v 2, 5 v 11, 7 v 10, 6 v 8, 3-bye
Day 10: 1 v 7, 3 v 8, 5 v 9, 6 v 11, 10 v 4, 2-bye
Day 11: 2 v 6, 3 v 5, 4 v 8, 7 v 9, 10 v 11, 1-bye

Thank you, and we hope you all (well, most of you) enjoy your stay in Very Angry Rabbits.

Hey! I know I said Don’t touch the red buttons!

With Respect (well…for most of you),
Ruppert
The Incompetent
Etc.

:::somewhere on the blue line:::

Hans Frenk looked at the map again. He turned to his 3 travelling companions. "Guys, I think we're lost. Hwang, are you sure they said *always* transfer to the blue line when lost?"

The Cornelu Penquins hit the ice for a practice session before their first game. They were running sprint drills and doing them to perfection.

The goalies then took turns in the net to take penalty shots, point shots and traffic shots.

The coach was overseeing all of this and was nodding his head. He composed himself as a General should. After four hours of practice, he blew his whistle twice and the team formed ranks.

"You are all looking good. Keep this up and we should do quite well here in VAR. Everything rests on you ladies." The General stated. "Our families will be able to listen to the games and watch them live on TV due to the fact that we brought our own press and they'll broadcast regardless of what these rabbits dictate. You will compose yourselves as professionals ladies. Because if you don't, you'll be running wind sprints between now and the time we leave. You think you get tired now, you'll be passed out by the time you leave here. Dismissed!"

With that, the Penquins left the ice, showered, and went back to the hotel.

The head of the HBK, Jack Hackett, meets with Coach Mikkonen somewhere in V.A.R.

JH: RABBITS!

CM: Yes, Jack. Many rabbits. They live here.

JH: RABBITS! FOOD!

CM: Don't eat the natives. We want to qualify this year. Speaking of which, who are we playing first?

JH: GOBSH**ES!

CM: Starblaydia aren't in our group, are they? I'll check....ah, Squornshelous. Easy meat.

JH: MEAT! RABBITS! FOOD!

CM: Now, Jack, I told you not to eat the...oh crap.

By George Ludenstien
Remus Post


The Praedorian Cohorts skated back to their home rink's locker room after a particularly smoothly organized practice. Jackson Willow, a 6'2 187 lbs 22 year old center from Centrailia looked extremly promissing in the few scrimages that were played in the try-out "hockey boot camp" for the past 4 weeks in Rurigston's facilities (constructed in 2 weeks to accomodate the newly announced national hockey team). The buildings were made of sheet metal, steal supports, a foundation, and duct tape. A new rink is expected to be constructed in New Essex by late winter, and another in Rurigston to house the Rurigsburg Rampage.

It's hard to say how the Cohorts will do, not one member of their team had ever played in an international event, but one thing is evident; no matter whether or not they win the Don Cherry Cup, the country will welcome their new heros warmly when they return.

Introducing The Huskies


All the arrangements have been made and the Huskies have arrived and are all set to compete in their first ever Cherry Cup competition.


The Staff

Coach - Gregory Sarrazin
One of the President’s many cronies. Made the mistake of including the President’s name in a rude limerick and was promptly thrown in jail. He was given the choice of ten years hard labour or coaching the new national ice hockey team. It is typical of the Hypocrian system that he chose one thing and got the other.


Assistant Coach - Wayne Domingo
Choreographer of the spectacularly unsuccessful Hyppos on Ice show. Was last seen following a blue line . . .

Assistant Coach – Graeme Grant
Happened to glance at one of the recruitment posters and was immediately stuffed into an unmarked van. Woke up on the plane to Very Angry Rabbits.


A random worker in the Department of Sport and Leisure happened to get a note in a fortune cookie one day saying that people whose name ends with “ov” make good hockey players. After a failed recruitment campaign officials started scouring prisons, hostels, dole queues and the gutters of Hypocrium on a Friday night to find anyone that fit the bill. And they did.


The Squad


Andy Orlov
Gregori Petrov
Georgi Sukarov
Peter Ustinov (no not that Peter Ustinov silly)
Andrei Stoyanov
Illian Rostov
Hristo Griznikov
Paul Petkov
Evgeny Bormirov
Igor Kriskov
Victor Fedorov
Danis Morosov
Alexei Guskov
Dmitri Simikov
Nikolai Rybakov
Andy Joukov
Darius Varmirov
Vyacheslav Bykov
Yuri Molotov
Mikhail Romanov
Boris Anisimov
Oleg Yachanov


The Mascot


Neville - A very, very, very bad tempered Husky


Tactics


The Huskies play a system of “total hockey” in which any player can play in any position at any time. Seeing as they are all equally clueless that should work just fine.


The Group

The Huskies have been drawn in the 3rd Airborne Division along with nations such as Tanah Burung, Chicanada, Hockey Canada, Robotopolis, Liverpool England and Harlesburg (with a “u” apparently) who all seem to know what they’re doing. Which is unfortunate. We start with a match against the reigning champions Tanah Burung. Yay.


The Schedule

1. Hypocria vs Tanah Burung
2. Hypocria vs Robotopolis
3. Hypocria vs Bidpedal Apes
4. Hypocria vs Liverpool England
5. Hypocria vs Tonissia
6. Hypocria vs Hockey Canada
7. Hypocria vs The Mushroom Kinship (Not Kingdom)
8. Hypocria vs The South Packerlands
9. Hypocria vs Chicanada
10. Hypocria – Bye *waves*
11. Hypocria vs Harlesburg


Matchday 3 takes place at the home of the Edgeburrow Rangers. (45,000)
Matchdays 5, 7 and 8 will take place in the National Arena. (32,000)
Matchdays 1 and 11 take place in West Edgeburrow Community College. (24,000)
Matchdays 4 and 6 will take place at VARENA. (48,000)
Matchdays 2 and 9 will take place at some frozen pond. (324 ish)

All matches will start at 6:00am. Again, yay.

Press Release for Trans-border consumption

From the Foreign Ministry of Republic of Bipedal Apes

Bananaton - Ms. Blatvart, Assistant Professor of Watersports and coach of Bipedaleen entrant to Don Cherry Cup of Hockey Championdom, continues to work hard, trying to get team ready for start of play. Further research by esteemed two-footer scientists and engineers of RBA has revealed that hockey not played, as originally thought, in shallow water, but on top of pool of frozen water. How to freeze so much water all at once is problem currently being worked out. So far, attempts to convert water-pool to ice by adding large number of ice cubes have been strangely unsuccessful. Players, though wet, keep practicing hard at running with ice skates tied to feet while swinging icicles at ball. Not quite clear to observers what kind of sense game makes, but all are eager to see team succeed in Trans-border hockey contest.

Also, University researchers have proudly announced nickname of national side: Skate-Footers. Thank you and good night.

Fresh from Iansisle, the land where everyone goes to the beach in perfect 82º weather after the game, YOUR CHERRY CUP VII CHAMPION IANSISLEEEE GUUUUUUUULLS!

http://www.arthritis.org/images/chapters/sandiego/gulls_logo_t.gif (http://sandiegogulls.com/)
Gulls CCXIV Roster:

G: Sergei Naumov
G: Trevor Koenig

RW: Martin St. Amour
RW: Mark Woolf (AC)
RW: Dennis Purdie
RW: Ashlee Langdone
RW: R.J. Enga

LW: Kevin St. Jacques
LW: Sandro Sbrocca
LW: Clayton Read
LW: Mark Pederson
C: B.J. MacPherson (C)
C: Mark Stitt
C: David Neal
C: Sylvain Deschatelets

D: Jamie Black
D: Brett Larson (AC)
D: Sergei Visegorodcevs
D: Taj Melson
D: Kevin Grant
D: Samy Nasreddine
D: Sammy Dejean

First Line
RW: Martin St. Amour
C: B.J. MacPherson
LW: Kevin St. Jacques

Second Line
RW: Mark Woolf
C: Mark Stitt
LW: Mark Pederson

Third Line
RW: Ashlee Langdone
C: David Neal
LW: Sandro Sbrocca

Fourth Line
RW: Dennis Purdie
C: Sylvain Deschatelets
LW: Clayton Read

Defensive Line 1
RD: Jamie Black
LD: Sergei Visegorodcevs

Defensive Line 1
RD: Taj Melson
LD: Samy Nasreddine

Power Play 1
RW: Mark Woolf
C: B.J. MacPherson
LW: Kevin St. Jacques
RD: Jamie Black
LD: Samy Nasreddine

Power Play 2
RW: Martin St. Amour
C: Mark Stitt
LW: Mark Pederson
RD: Taj Melson
LD: Samy Nasreddine

Penalty Kill 1
RW: Ashlee Langdone
LW: Kevin St. Jacques
RD: Brett Larson
LD: Sergei Visegorodcevs

Penalty Kill 2
RW: Martin St. Amour
LW: Mark Woolf
RD: Taj Melson
LD: Samy Nasreddine

A group of Daistallian fans, having settled into their lodgings, wander into the nearest drinking establishment. After settling in with their drinks, a rather large fan with hair dyed gold and silver (not blond and white - *gold and silver*) asks his server "Hey, do ya know where we can score some weed?"

OOC: no idea on the legality of various recreational chemicals in VAR...

Huskies’ Training Session


Huskies coach Gregory Sarrazin is talking with his assistant Graeme Grant.

GS: “Ok I suppose we’d better get started then. Organise them into two teams, wait, how many players are there in an ice hockey team?”

GG: “I don’t know, six I think.”

GS: “Six? What am I meant to do with the rest of these thugs?”

GG: “You’re the coach you tell me.”

GS: “Oh never mind, just fetch a couple of balls and we’ll start.”

GG: “Balls? I don’t think they use balls in ice hockey.”

GS: “Who made you the expert? Ok then, as you clearly have all the answers, what do they use?”

GG: “One of these.”

GS: “What’s that?”

GG: “It’s a puck.”

GS: “A what? It’s using that kind of language that got me here in the first place.”

GG: “No, it’s actually called a puck.”

GS: “Do you really think I’m going to fall for that? What is it anyway?”

GG: “It’s some kind of vulcanised rubber disc.”

GS: “Good, then that’s what we’ll call it. Incidentally where’s Wayne?”

GG: “I last saw him following one of those blue lines.”

GS: “What? After I specifically said not to follow the blue lines?”

GG: “No, you said not to press the red buttons. You didn’t mention the blue lines.”

GS: “He’s the only one that can skate, what are we meant to do now?”

GG: “It’s a pain but we’ll just have to start without him.”

GS: “Speaking of pains, have you noticed that Neville seems a bit quieter than usual?”

GG: “Maybe it’s because he’s a little husky.”

GS: “That’s not getting any funnier.”

They both turn to where the mascot's two well padded handlers are standing. The handlers seem oblivious to the fact that one is holding a lead with a chewed off end, and no Neville.

GS: “Oh isn’t that just great? Ok, everyone spread out, he can’t have got far.”

GG: “But we have to play the champions, shouldn’t we start practising?”

GS: “Practise is cancelled. We need to find that furry maniac before he starts savaging the locals. Now put down that vulcanised rubber disc and go and fetch the cattle prods”

Harlesburg team

GOALIES
#1Jorge Oliverier 40 4th Cherry Cup and also his last works the crease well.
#3John LeBartard 36 Oliverier's understudies understudy for the last 12 years finnaly gets his chance to be the Understudy.Ludian Devil Rays
#41Mark Perve 22 First Cherry Cup LeBartard's understudy at The Ludian Devil Rays.Devil Rays

DEFENCEMEN
#19 Brober O'Shea 18 young up and comer straight out of Highschool plays for Harlesburg University.
#23 Handel Lefrankie(C)41 A Veteran of all 3 of The Harlesburg Blades Campaigns in Cherry Cups was inspirational in his position as Alternate Captain and took the riens after Cherry Cup 12.
#26 Carl Eunuch 24 In his second Cherry Cup Scorer of 1 goals and with a +/- rating of 18
#72 Peter Van Ziel 27 Coming to the end of his carrer and finally gets a shot at international level
#33 Hurbert Zeleet 32 In his Second Tournament big strong player likes working his opponents into the boards.
#23 Tobias Mormo 21 Young fast and aggressive are the 3 words best used to describe Tobias also a furicious and commited ppenalty killer often putting his body on the line.
#13 Mester Von Rebel 23 Capable puck handler but is more noted for his checks a specialist penalty killer.Plays for Oestenferl
#11 Rabbit Warren 28 got his name from as a baby being found in a Rabbit Warren and the local police authorities thought it would be slightly humourous to name him so.As a result he is slightly unhinged.Looking for a Club to aquire his services after last club Harlesburg RainJackets released him.

FORWARDS
#43 Jurgen Gleanmier 22 First Cherry Cup fast on the ice strong shot of around 104(MPH)Tyber Rapids
#9 Pierre Mur-St-Nome(A) 39 Also a Veteran of every Harlesburg campaign fast agile player of 5'8" stature.Plays for Olgen GreenBoots
#8 Harald Fernescu 17 Still in High School but believably fast with excellent motor skills which are shown through his puck handling.Plays for Duke Edward Harlesburg Middleschool Phoenixs
#17 Phillip Cuntenescu 18 Out of Highschool and a Profesional Ice Hockey player for Harlesburg NorthStars
#12 Marcus Antenescu 22 Dennier Navigators Left Wing who switches between lines.
#27 Kielt Von Kliener 19 In his 2nd year of University playing for Harlesburg Tech Taipans
#99 Denis Patrick-Bormon-Smith 30 A veteran of 2 of the 3 Harlesburg Campaigns missing out on the 12th Cherry Cup due to Injury.Hector Hazzards
#27 Louis Eldermane 23 2nd Cherry Cup scored 2 Goals in last Campaign

Centres
#74 Pierre St Laurent(A)37 After being in the team since Cherry Cup XI has seen the highs and lows of Ice Hockey Top International Scorer for Harlesburg with 9 from 12 games Plays for Jasper Jaguars
#16 Thomas Mc'Bride 25 In his last year of a LAw Degree at Strongbadia University plays for the Strongbadia Guerros
#63 Batholomew Garnescu 24 League Leader in the Harlesburg Domestic League for Assists with 10 per 15 games also collects a goal every 3 games
#48 Christopher Le plaat 18 Last year of Highschool where he pays for the Gardinier High Guardians another member of the youth Brigade prevalent in this Squad

Starting Lineup

OFFENSIVE LINES
Fernescu-St Laurent-Cuntenescu
Antenescu-Mc'Bride-Mur-St-Nome
Kliener-Garnescu-Patrick-Bormon-Smith
Gleanmier-Christopher Le plaat-Eldermane

DEFENSIVE PAIRS
Lefrankie-O'Shea
Eunuch-Warren
Van Ziel-Zeleet

Power Play 1
Fernescu-St Laurent-Patrick-Bormon-Smith
Lefrankie-Warren
Power Play 2
Kliener-Mc'Bride-Cuntenescu
Van Ziel-O'Shea

Penalty Kill 1
Fernescu-Mur-St-Nome
Von Rebel-Warren

Penalty Kill 2
Eldermane-Patrick-Bormon-Smith
Mormo-O'Shea

GOALIES
Starting: Jorge Oliverier
Backup: John LeBartard

COACH:
Barry Melrose

Well, ladies and gentlemen, the first game day of Cherry Cup XIV has concluded - all games have been played - and the results are posted below

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 - Vtorbetin 5 (2/2)
Kericia 0 - Lovisa 5
Bedistan 5 - Starblaydia 3
Euroslavia 2 - Oliverry 0
Iansisle 5 - Fmjphoenix 3
VAR - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 4 - Hypocria 5
Robotopolis 1 - Chicanada 0
Bipedal Apes 3 - Harlesburg 4
The Mushroom Kingship 0 - Hockey Canada 2
Liverpool England 5 - Tonissia 2
TSP - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 0 - Krytenia 1
Formal Dances 0 - Druida 1
Poppuli 0 - The Gulf States 5
Vilita 1 - Spruitland 3
Corneliu 4 - Daistallia 2104 5
Bettia - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Lovisa 1 1 0 0 0 5 0 +5 3
Bedistan 1 1 0 0 0 5 3 +2 3
Iansisle 1 1 0 0 0 5 3 +2 3
Euroslavia 1 1 0 0 0 2 0 +2 3
Vtorbetin 1 0 0 1 0 7 7 0 1
Kalaallit Nunaat 1 0 0 1 0 7 7 0 1
Starblaydia 1 0 0 0 1 3 5 -2 0
Fmjphoenix 1 0 0 0 1 3 5 -2 0
Oliverry 1 0 0 0 1 0 2 -2 0
Kericia 1 0 0 0 1 0 5 -5 0
Very Angry Rabbits 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0


3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Liverpool England 1 1 0 0 0 5 2 +3 3
Hockey Canada 1 1 0 0 0 2 0 +2 3
Hypocria 1 1 0 0 0 5 4 +1 3
Harlesburg 1 1 0 0 0 4 3 +1 3
Robotopolis 1 0 0 1 0 1 0 +1 3
Tanah Burung 1 0 0 1 0 4 5 -1 0
Bipedal Apes 1 0 0 0 1 3 4 -1 0
Chicanada 1 0 0 0 1 0 1 -1 0
The Mushroom Kingship 1 0 0 0 1 0 2 -2 0
Tonissia 1 0 0 0 1 2 5 -3 0
The South Packerlands 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 1 1 0 0 0 5 0 +5 3
Spruitland 1 1 0 0 0 3 1 +2 3
Daistallia 2104 1 1 0 0 0 5 4 +1 3
Krytenia 1 1 0 0 0 1 0 +1 3
Druida 1 1 0 0 0 1 0 +1 3
Corneliu 1 0 0 1 0 4 5 -1 0
Squornshelous 1 0 0 0 1 0 1 -1 0
Formal Dances 1 0 0 0 1 0 1 -1 0
Vilita 1 0 0 0 1 1 3 -2 0
Poppuli 1 0 0 0 1 0 5 -5 0
Bettia 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0

Otto Matic posted the standings, one game into Cherry Cup XIV, for the three divisions, on the Official Notices, Bulletins, and Information Board. He had already dispatched messengers to each participating team with the standings, and ensured that the news media had been informed.

And, had paid three engineers, two architects, a physisist, two mathematicians, a catering staff, a medical staff, four statisticians, and the obligatory partridge in a pear tree, a veritable fortune (the cash had come in neat satchels from the First Veritable Bank of Very Angry Rabbits) - for constructing the statistics tables.

Now all he had to do was convince Harvey to convince Ruppert the Incompetent to convince The Old Grey Hare to reimburse Otto for these expenses.

Otherwise, Otto's family fortune had disappeared forever in those little First Veritable Bank satchels...

OOC: In CC5, I used Excel to create standings all organized, then made a screen shot and posted the image here. However, I don't think a few of the posters could see that .jpg for some reason. It's a suggestion anyway.

IC: No complaints from the locker room after the 5-0 opening game win for the Peliceans. Although not many coaches or players wanted to make commentary, it was generally agreed that perhaps this one win can lead to the first postseason appearance for The Gulf States in at least a half dozen Cups.

And better late than never, this year's Peliceans roster....

C1: Craig Peterson #1 - Windsor, Ontario, TGS Canada
C2: Thomas Fletcher #22 - Mississauga, Ontario, TGS Canada
C3: Stephen Smith #14 - Thompson, Manitoba, TGS Canada
LW1: Jacques Lyons #8 - Lac du Ville, Quebec, TGS Canada
LW2: Jean Peltier #20 - Sherbrooke, Quebec, TGS Canada
LW3: Marcus Thames #28 - Halifax, Nova Scotia, TGS Canada
RW1: Tyrone Davis #27 - New Castle, Delaware (Flocarga and Delmarva)
RW2: Peter McDougall #9 - Millbury, Bardista, Mainland
RW3: Manuel Sanchez #53 - Orange, Rutland, Mainland
D1: Pedro Ortiz #6 - Paterson, Flordis, Mainland
D2: Mike Henderson #15 - St. Catharines, Ontario, TGS Canada
D3: Tim Horton #5 - Toronto, Ontario, TGS Canada
D4: Wayne Simmons #25 - Pittsfield, Bardista, Mainland
D5: Sean Carter #11 - East Orange, Rutland, Mainland
D6: Tom Johnson #21 - Lewiston, Palm Bay, Mainland
G1: Dan Solmwyski #30 - Barrie, Ontario, TGS Canada
G2: Gerald Martin #31 - Hull, Quebec, TGS Canada
G3: Alejandro Campos #36 - Baltimore, Maryland (Flocarga and Delmarva)

In case you didn't figure it out, our starters...
Lyons - Peterson - Davis
Ortiz - Henderson
Solmwyski

Off to a Stumbling Start
cuz that's what Ferrets do

The Squornshelous Ferrets opened up their 9th Cherry Cup in their usual style: with a loss, and a shutout loss at that. The team was unable to record more than their paltry final total of 11 shots on goal in the entire game, while allowing 34 against keeper Miika Svenson, who put in the best performance of any member of the team. Of course, no one could ever top the "performance" put on every game by Krog Dugsk and Wet Biscuit MacGlee, who are being referred to in Squornshelous as "Satan's Brothers". They once again put up penatly numbers amazing to anyone who has never seen a Squornshelan hockey game before. The two enforcers were each charged with instigating, fighting, elbowing, cross checking, boarding and with 7::23 to play in the third, both were slapped with game misconduct penalties and ejected, after Krog tackled a referee who was trying unsuccessfully to pry Wet Bicuist off of an unfortunate Krytenian player.

Final Score:
Squornshelous 0-1 Krytenia

Tanah Burung 4 - Hypocria 5
Robotopolis 1 - Chicanada 0
Bipedal Apes 3 - Harlesburg 4
The Mushroom Kingship 0 - Hockey Canada 2
Liverpool England 5 - Tonissia 2
P W D L OT GF GA P
Tanah Burung 1 0 0 1 0 4 5 0
Robotopolis 1 1 0 0 0 1 0 2
Chicanada 1 0 0 1 0 0 1 0
Hockey Canada 1 1 0 0 0 2 0 2
Tonissia 1 0 0 1 0 2 5 0
Harlesburg 1 1 0 0 0 4 3 2
Liverpool England 1 1 0 0 0 5 2 2
The Mushroom Kingship 1 0 0 1 0 0 2 0
Bipedal Apes 1 0 0 1 0 3 4 0
Hypocria 1 1 0 0 0 5 4 2
TSP 0 0 0 0 0 0 0 0


I thin i should get an extra goal for this! :p

Huskies Are No Respecter of Ranbk



Hypocria 5 – 4 Tanah Burung



Do not adjust your sets Ice Hockey fans what your seeing did actually happen. It was the greatest day in Hypocrian Ice Hockey history as the Huskies beat the champions in front of a television audience that almost reached double figures.

How did it happen? Well, to tell you the truth, we aren’t entirely sure as our reporter at the stadium (or “rink” as the kids say) was far too busy playing minesweeper on his laptop to actually watch what was going on. But what we do know is that the group of stoned Spruitlanders who were cheering on the Huskies, lured by the promise of shiny beads, loved every minute of it.

After we had found out that it was Darius Varmirov who had hit the deciding goal our reporter managed to get this exclusive interview.


R: “Darius, tell us what was going on through your head at the end there.”

D: “Well one of their players was really bugging me so I thought I’d get my own back.”

R: “And you did it in style didn’t you?”

D: “No I didn’t.”

R: “What do you mean?”

D: “That big guy standing in front of that net was really annoying so I thought I’d clobber him with the vulcanized rubber disc. But I missed.”

R: “But you beat him.”

D: “No I missed him.”

R: “He was the goalie and you beat him. You hit the winning goal.”

D: “I did?”

R: “You did. Against the champions as well. You’re the greatest hero in Hypocrian Ice Hockey history.”

D: “I am?”

R: “Yes.”

D: “Oh.”

OOC: VAR, I see the code boxes aren't being nice to you. :)
I found that it's usually easiest to make the table in notepad first. Or if you use Word or something else, to make it in a font that uses a fixed width for every letter (like Courier). Also, don't use tab between the columns, that's the main thing that messes it up - use the space bar.
It's a bit of a pain, I know. :)

Do not adjust your set. We have temporarily pre-empted your regularly scheduled program for a technical adjustment. It will only take a moment. Please have patience.

OOC: VAR, I see the code boxes aren't being nice to you. :)
I found that it's usually easiest to make the table in notepad first. Or if you use Word or something else, to make it in a font that uses a fixed width for every letter (like Courier). Also, don't use tab between the columns, that's the main thing that messes it up - use the space bar.
It's a bit of a pain, I know. :)Sprui - thanks for the kind advice. Unfortunately, I was finished before I read it.

In the past, I've built these things in Word, and it wasn't too difficult. This time, I tried to use Excel. Bad mistake. I shall never do that again.

However, now that I have the template done, updates will be easy.

Thanks again.

Now, on with the show...

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program. We apologize for any inconvenience. Yeah, sure - listen, this is the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits - get used to it, Bub.

ChicanadaSun
Yeah, we like giagantic names.

Kodiaks Drop One
But 1-0 Loss to Robots Seen As Good

Nothin to report...roster still not released as Chicanada drops a 1-0 decision to Robotopolis.

Kodiaks grand Schedule for CCXIV

Day 1: v Robotopolis (L 0-1)
Day 2: v Bipedal Apes
Day 3: v The Mushroom Kingship
Day 4: v Tanah Burung
Day 5: v Harlesburg
Day 6: v The South Packerlands
Day 7: v Liverpool England
Day 8: off date
Day 9: v Hypocria
Day 10: v Tonissa
Day 11: v Hockey Canada

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/sportsgazette.jpg


Solid start for Spruitland

Vilita – Spruitland: 1 – 3

The Spruitland Ice Bunnies have started off their second Cherry Cup as they did their first: with a win – though perhaps this time it was a little less unexpected. In a typically Spruitlandish game with lots of body-checks, hookings and trippings, mixed with an occasional fist fight, the Ice Bunnies disposed of fellow Atlantian Oceanians Vilita with three goals to one.

They almost didn’t make it to the game though. Spruitland has been drawn into the Seventeenth Mechanized Infantry Division, which means they will play what the Very Angry Rabbits refer to as “Lunch Games”. For Spruitlanders, however, games played at 12:00 would better be described as “Before Breakfast” games. An appeal to some wandering VAR official to be transferred to the First Armored Division was utterly ignored.

The win against Vilita puts the Ice Bunnies right near the top of the table, a position they have gotten used to after Cherry Cup 13. The players and staff are not certain who they’ll be playing next, and have no clue whatsoever where the match will be played, but are confident that they’ll get there in time.

“We’ll just follow the yellow line,” defender Karl Mellick shrugs. “Or was it the blue one? Can’t remember. Oh well, if we get lost, we’ll just press one of them red buttons. That always seems to get someone’s attention. As long as we don’t have to play on a pond again, everything’s fine by us.”

http://bellsouthpwp.net/h/a/harleyt_1387/bsd_banner.png
hockey

Porcupines in severe debt after seemingly-impossible win

EDGEBURROW, Very Angry Rabbits -- Odds on Bedistan's ragtag group of twelve men in hockey masks, only three of which had previously seen a match being played, successfully defeating Cherry Cup 8 champions Starblaydia were as high as 12000-1 at some of the most prestigious bookmakers in Bedistan. As such, some of those bookmakers are now filing for bankruptcy after being unable to pay what in a few cases amounts to a payout of tens of billions of bakrani (basically, twenties of billions of U.S. dollars) after the Porcupines' absolutely miraculous 5-3 win over the Rayzors. Even the players themselves reportedly have no idea how they pulled it off. "We were just kinda there," said Albert Yost. "I really wasn't even paying a whole lot of attention, so I was just as surprised as everybody at the end of the third period when we got the win."

However, there is something of interest regarding the situation. According to a press release made by the Bedistan Sports Ministry early this morning, the national hockey team's fund has been overdrawn. Significantly. To the tune of þ4.2 million (about US$8.8 million). Officials are tight-lipped regarding where this money may have gone, but speculation is rampant that it might have been used to curry favor from the VAR officials (or "Dice", as they refer to them). It is presumed that the organization in charge of the Starblaydi team will investigate these rumors, though this is of course not confirmed.

On a (mostly) unrelated note, many foreigners watching our team's exploits might wonder why we have only twelve players, who are not divided into the usual categories (1st line, 2nd line, 3rd line, etc.). The Sports Ministry provides two reasons: 1) they didn't know any better (hockey was not previously played in Bedistan), and 2) they had enough trouble coming up with twelve people! Asking for any more would be ridiculous! Says the Sub-Minister of Sports, International Division: "If we can beat Starblaydia, we must be doing well enough that our way works, and we'll stick with it."

Coach Tim Jacobson had a few choice words for his Praedorian Cohorts after their 0-5 loss.

"What was that?"
"I thought I asked what I saw in the last 60 minutes of hockey."
"Anyone?"
"Well then I'll tell you, I saw the worst effort I've seen out of you boys yet."
"Are you guys thinking I'm home free, I made the team, well I'll have each one of you all thinking that's ass on a plane back home so fast it'll make their head spin."
"I'm not looking for us to win this thing, I just want a vallient effort."
"I don't care who we're playing, if we play harder then them 99 out of 100 times we'll win."
"I want you all to get some rest and meet me back here in 7 hours for practice, and let me warn you now it's not going to be pretty, so if you can't handle it go home now."

The only one who left was the handi-capped defenseman Joger Elenbogel. On the return flight back an alternate defenseman who was on stand-by was dispatched. Paul Davis has joined the 3rd defensive pairing in place of Joger Elenbogel(who completly screwed up the coach's motivational speech).

*A medical room somewhere in VAR. Coach Mikkonen and his assistant, Horace Reinhard, are checking over an injured player with a couple of medical types.*

HR: Here's Martin King, coach. Got beaned in the head by a puck and now he doesn't know who he is.

CM: Excellent. Tell him he's Gretzky.

MK: Who...what...where?

CM: What do you remember son?

MK: I got hit in the head, staggered towards the changing rooms, then I saw this blue box...and a man and a woman...then I woke up here.

Doc: Hello there. How are you feeling today?

MK: Who...who are you two? You look familiar...

Doc: I'm the doctor. And this lady here is my associate -

Nurse: Nurse Rose Tyler.

MK: Oh. Doctor who?

Formal Dances 0 - Druida 1
Corneliu 4 - Daistallia 2104 5

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Druida 1 0 0 1 0 1 0 +1 3
Corneliu 1 0 0 1 0 4 5 -1 0




Druida fan #1: "Hey! We won! So why've we only got one point?"

Druda fan #2 (nudging Druida fan #1): "We're Hockey Canadian now, remember? Druida have three Liverpool Englanders as their fans."

Druida fan #1: "Oh. Well, uh, why have they only got one point, anyways?"

Druida fan #2: "I don't know, man. I don't know. Fancy trying to work it out over a beer?"

Druida fan #1: "OK."

"Have you seen today's results, Ruppert?" asked The Old Grey Hare.

"No, brother - I haven't. How'd we do?" answered Ruppet the Incompetent.

"Scored 4 goals."

"Ah! Not bad!"

"Ah...not good. Kalaallit Nunaat scored 5."

"Oh...and, of course, you mention Kalaallit Nunaats' score because they were..."

"Our opponents today. Yes. Listen, Rup, can you give the Director - what's his name, Oswald Mattress?"

"Otto Matic."

"Yes, him. Give him a message for me. Tell him if he can't get a decent performance out of those bums he puts out on the ice, I will find someone else who can. And I will write their contract on his hide. Can you pass that along, Rup?"

"...uh...Yes...I'll see that he...uh...get's your message..."

"Thanks, brother. Here, here's todays sports pages. Have a look at the competition. Take it along to this Otto fellow - and tell him to pay particular attention to that "W" column next on the Artic Hares line - because I intend to focus my attention there."

With that, The Old Grey Hare tossed a section of his paper at his brother, and stormed out of the room.

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 - Very Angry Rabbits 4
Kericia 0 - Vtorbetin 1
Bedistan 3 - Lovisa 0
Euroslavia 0 - Starblaydia 0 (2/3)
Iansisle 0 - Oliverry 5
Fmjphoenix - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 1 - The South Packerlands 3
Robotopolis 4 - Hypocria 4 (0/0)
Bipedal Apes 2 - Chicanada 4
The Mushroom Kingship 5 - Harlesburg 1
Liverpool England 2 - Hockey Canada 2 (0/3)
Tonissia - bye

17th Mech Inf Div
Squornshelous 3 - Bettia 2
Formal Dances 2 - Krytenia 2 (1/4)
Poppuli 2 - Druida 0
Vilita 1 - The Gulf States 4
Corneliu 4 - Spruitland 3
Daistallia 2104 - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Bedistan 2 2 0 0 0 8 3 +5 6
Kalaallit Nunaat 2 1 0 1 0 12 11 +1 4
Vtorbetin 2 1 0 1 0 8 7 +1 4
Oliverry 2 1 0 0 1 5 2 +3 3
Lovisa 2 1 0 0 1 5 3 +2 3
Euroslavia 2 1 0 0 1 4 3 +1 3
Iansisle 2 1 0 0 1 5 8 -3 3
Starblaydia 2 0 1 0 1 6 7 -1 2
Fmjphoenix 1 0 0 0 1 3 5 -2 0
Very Angry Rabbits 1 0 0 0 1 4 5 -1 0
Kericia 2 0 0 0 2 0 6 -6 0

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Hockey Canada 2 1 1 0 0 7 2 +5 5
Hypocria 2 1 0 1 0 9 8 +1 4
Robotopolis 2 1 0 1 0 5 4 +1 4
The Mushroom Kingship 2 1 0 0 1 5 3 +2 3
The South Packerlands 1 1 0 0 0 3 1 +2 3
Chicanada 2 1 0 0 1 4 3 +1 3
Liverpool England 2 1 0 0 1 7 7 0 3
Harlesburg 2 1 0 0 1 5 7 -2 3
Tanah Burung 2 0 0 0 2 5 8 -3 0
Bipedal Apes 2 0 0 0 2 5 8 -3 0
Tonissia 1 0 0 0 1 2 5 -3 0

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 2 2 0 0 0 9 1 +8 6
Krytenia 2 1 1 0 0 7 3 +4 5
Spruitland 2 1 0 0 1 6 5 +1 3
Daistallia 2104 1 1 0 0 0 5 4 +1 3
Corneliu 2 1 0 0 1 8 8 0 3
Squornshelous 2 1 0 0 1 3 3 0 3
Druida 2 1 0 0 1 1 2 -1 3
Poppuli 2 1 0 0 1 2 5 -3 3
Bettia 1 0 0 0 1 2 3 -1 0
Formal Dances 2 0 0 0 2 3 7 -4 0
Vilita 2 0 0 0 2 2 7 -5 0

==============================
ooc: anticipate next gameday scores to be posted in approximately 48 hours (2300 EST on Tuesday)

Druida that was very gently done - :) - thanks. while there was something wrong with the tables, it wasn't the number of points you have - last column is points, you had 3 after day 1. but instead of recording a win, i think i recorded a draw. Fixed.

All I found a few other errors in the tables - the ones I found are still there in day 1, but were fixed on the day 2 tables. If anyone finds errors, please let me know and I will fix 'em.

edit: found and fixed two more errors in tables.

CORNELIU SPORTS PAGES

Today, Corneliu defeated Spruitland 4 to 3. This marks their first victory in CC XIV. The team performed as they stated they would at this cup. Their first game against ended in a 5-4 defeat but the team played hard. They are starting to show signs of being the team of old.

"I am pleased with their performance. This was a terrific game. One of the best I've ever coached. I salute Spruitland on a well played game and I wish them luck throughout the rest of the tournament. Now that they are out of the way, we are preparing for our next opponet. We are taking this one at a time because anything more than that will result in disaster."

That was what the manager said after the game. Other players were echoing the same sentiments as they were packing up their gear to head back to the hotel.

It is amazing to see that though they did play a very difficult game, they didn't seem to tired afterwards. I guess it goes back to the conditioning techniques. If they keep this up, look for our beloved Penquins to go far in this Cherry Cup.

I demand a reroll Both die cast hit breadcrumbs unfair reroll![/rant]

"Okay, our first game of the tournament. Now, I know you guys won't have had much expeirence playing together, what with there being no ice hockey league in Bettia. In fact, some of you haven't skated before in your life. But the government have sent us out here for a laugh, and to see if we can perform some sort of miracle out there. Right now lads, put your skates on, we've got a game."

"Skates?"

"Yes you know, those bladey things you put on your feet."

"Ah right."

"Now let me go through our tactics once more. You see those wooden things on your hands? That's a stick. You use that to hit that little black thing into the goal."

"Which goal."

"The one without a Bettian standing in front of it."

"Okay. And what if those nasty-looking Squornshelous blokes get in the way?"

"Then you use your dazzling skills to go around them."

"Heh. Piece of piss. C'mon lads, lets go go go! Whooooah!"

**THUMP**

"Yes, it helps if you stay on your feet. Now, ignore all those people laughing at you. Remember what I told you - hit the ball into their goal."

An hour or two later

"Yeees! Hey Boss, we won! We were great out there, weren't we? We scored two goals! Yes, two! Count em! Two!"

"Yes, very good. There's just teensy weensy problem though."

"What's that?"

"They scored three."

"Oh, so THAT'S why they were cheering and hugging each other. Ah well, second time lucky eh?"

"So we won"

"Yup... 1st in the so called "3rd Airborne Division". Never made any sense to me naming the divisions that."

"So naming them "Xafilah" and "Insert Name Here" division wasn't tha good of an idea."

"It was the concept!!! Just look at all the names of the divisions backwards except "Insert Name Division" you get the names of cities in Hockey canada."

"Ohhhhhhh... so I'm yet to find "noisivid enruobria dr3" in Very Angry Rabbits."

"You idiot!!! It should be "enruobria dr3" What're you thinking?"

"I don't think sometimes, you should know."

"Maybe you'll care to know were 1st place in the 3rd Airborne Division. We were supposed to lose all of our games!!!"

"I know... but Liverpool England just wouldn't shoot on us. Our goalie scored one of their goals to bring it into OT."

"Yes... but you seemed to play well in OT."

"I guess it happens to all of us."

"How are we doing against Squornshelous?"

"They're stuck in 6th in that mechanicaliminity division."

"Mechanicaliminity? What have you been drinking?"

"That water-flavoured beer from that iceberg. What does it look like?"

"What happened to all the fans but us two?"

"They died trying to climb up the iceberg."

"Terrible, terrible death."

"How did we get on here?"

"Our government shot down our plane above the iceberg."

"Where does that put us now?"

"Just south of Vilita."

"Whyu don't we have a party then?"

"Because we need this beer to get to Druida if our soccer team will qualify for the World cup."

"How did the 94 inch Plasma TV get on the iceberg then?"

"This is the Cherry Cup!!! Nothing needs to make sense."

"Deep Fried Butter Nugget anyone?"

I demand a reroll Both die cast hit breadcrumbs unfair reroll![/rant]Ah, yes...Harlesberg - oops! sorry - Harlesburg. Unfortunate about those breadcrumbs. Otto had just finished an onion bagle with cream cheese, and everyone thought the crumbs had all been neatly brushed away.

Yes, yes...very enfortenet aboet those breadcrembs...


;)

Ah, yes...Harlesberg - oops! sorry - Harlesburg. Unfortunate about those breadcrumbs. Otto had just finished an onion bagle with cream cheese, and everyone thought the crumbs had all been neatly brushed away.

Yes, yes...very enfortenet aboet those breadcrembs...


;)

Where's our losses??? We demand to lose each game!!!! This is a national disgrace!.

Where's our losses??? We demand to lose each game!!!! This is a national disgrace!.


Official Press Release from the Squornshelan Ice Hockey Association
Ha! Ha!

Ferrets Demand a Rematch
Opponents were not adequately prepared

The strange and disturbing result of gameday 2 has caused quite an uproar in Squornshelous. The Ferrets defeated a team from Bettia 3-2 in regulation time, shocking fans. It was later discovered that none of the members of the Bettian side had ever played Ice Hockey before and SIHA has filed a formal request for a rematch to be played, on the grounds that the game was grossly unfair to the Bettians, since few of them knew their goal from the Squornshelan one, and even fewer could stand on their skates for more than a few seconds without falling. Squornshelous' desperate goal to finish below Hockey Canada in final standings went unmentioned in this request. Despite the win, we are still in a better position than they. The Hockey Canadians with 5 points from a pair of wins, one of which was in an overtime shootout, are at first place in the 3rd Airborne Division, whil the Ferrets have only 3 points and are sixth in the 17th Mechanized Infantry Division.

Iansisle 0 - Oliverry 5

"There will be vengeance!"

"Erm, Ashlee, we're not playing tomorrow. We can't get vengeance on a bye day."

"Who are those damn Québecois playing?"

"Our evil archnemisis and occasional oppressor, the Red and White Iceberg."

"Well, I hate Greenlanders almost as much as I hate French-Canadians - almost - and would really like to see them lose - but this is no time for rational thought!"

"Is it ever with you?"

"Silence, lackey! I have errands for you to run! Plant this bomb under the ice forthwith, and then mail these death threats to these alleged 'dice'. Heh, I suppose you could say I want each and every die ...to die! Hahahaha!"

"I'll give the pun a three out of ten."

"We'll have no more insolence! Once you return, sharpen my hockey stick, fill my pockets with poisonjuana, and calibrate my laser. Oh, yes - tomorrow will be a day of reckoning."

"What will you be doing in the meantime?"

"I'll be tying random rabbits onto the blue line. Their entire nation must suffer for this travesty! To work, and I am gone!"

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/sportsgazette.jpg


Ice Bunnies run into major problem

Corneliu – Spruitland: 4 – 3

On matchday 2 of the Cherry Cup, a major problem has cropped up for coach Coach and his team. With hardly any ice hockey skills at all, the Ice Bunnies managed to get 4th place in Cherry Cup 13, making use of their… physical style of play.

It seems it may not be so easy to use the same tactic this time. The Spruitlanders started their second game of the tounament in their usual fashion, ramming some Cornelians through the boards, poking sticks into some soft and dangly body parts. But the referees – in this tournament also referred to as ‘dice’ – did not approve of this technique and were rather generous in their allocation of penalty minutes.

The average Ice Bunny doesn’t mind an occasional few minutes on the penalty bench, but when it gets a bit excessive, like in today’s match, they use a fairly straightforward method to make the referees see their way: physical threats, and if necessary, the execution of these threats. However, this time, there was a problem with that.

“Well, the thing is,” 255 pound defender Frank Zandt says, “they’re, you know… rabbits. Put me up against any man, no matter how big, and I won’t flinch. Heck, I won’t even think twice about smacking a woman around. But one of them cute li’l bunnies…?”

Not to mention that the rabbit is Spruitland’s national animal, and hurting one in any way is punishable with upto 30 years of hard labor. Its not entirely certain whether this law also applies to foreign rabbits, but it doesn’t seem to matter much. All the Ice Bunnies refuse to lay their hands on any of the local rabbits, referees or not.

Coach Coach has appealed to another wandering VAR official, requesting that all Spruitland matches from now on have human referees, but there has been no reply so far.

“It’s not fair,” coach Coach sighs. “How do they expect us to win if we get penalties every time we put a fist into someone’s face, and we can’t even beat up the referee? This kind of thing puts a serious blemish on what this game is all about. Just look at tonight’s result. We lost to a bunch of Cornelian wimps! They actually used some of those fancy hockey moves and stuff. We can’t compete with that!”

Starting to come around...

Toronto -

Once again, The Gulf States is in first place in first round Cherry Cup play. And although it's only been two games so far, the progress so far has been pretty good. After all, the past few years The Gulf States has landed up 0-2 or something else showing dismal performance.

Head Coach Chris Sumter was quoted after the game against Vilita: "We're playing as hard as we can out there. We're trying to have some fun again. We have had many many bad years in a row. And we're just trying to regain a foothold on playing good hockey. We played a lot more international friendlies between the Cups. Gone back to some fundamentals. Got in new sets of players. Hell, we even got a couple players from Delmarva. So yeah, things should be looking good for the future. The fans in The Gulf States have long waited for the Cherry Cup to come to our soil."

And well, the fans are slowly starting to turn around. Hockey once again is the talk on the streets in many parts of TGS Canada. It's appearing on the front sports pages in major daily newspapers - in English, French, Spanish, and Portuguese.

One fan from Mississauga, who only gave his first name Mike, said he is a diehard hockey fan and is happy with this current run The Gulf States is having. "However, more progress than two games is needed for me. It's a start though. Cause wasn't there a Cup where we didn't even win two games in all the first round?"

A little ahead of schedule - Game Day 3 Results / Tables

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 - Oliverry 4
Kericia 1 - Very Angry Rabbits 0
Bedistan 0 - Vtorbetin 3
Euroslavia 2 - Lovisa 2 (1/2)
Fmjphoenix 3 - Starblaydia 4
Iansisle - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 3 - Hockey Canada 0
Robotopolis 2 - The South Packerlands 3
Bipedal Apes 3 - Hypocria 3 (1/0)
The Mushroom Kingship 2 - Chicanada 3
Tonissia 5 - Harlesburg 3
Liverpool England - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 0 - Spruitland 1
Formal Dances 2 - Bettia 1
Poppuli 5 - Krytenia 5 (4/2)
Vilita 2 - Druida 1
Daistallia 2104 2 - The Gulf States 2 (3/1)
Corneliu - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Vtorbetin 3 2 0 1 0 11 7 +4 7
Kalaallit Nunaat 3 2 0 1 0 17 15 +2 7
Bedistan 3 2 0 0 1 8 6 +2 6
Lovisa 3 1 1 0 1 9 6 +3 5
Starblaydia 3 1 1 0 1 10 10 0 5
Oliverry 3 1 0 0 2 9 7 +2 3
Euroslavia 3 1 0 0 2 7 7 0 3
Iansisle 2 1 0 0 1 5 8 -3 3
Kericia 3 1 0 0 2 1 6 -5 3
Very Angry Rabbits 2 0 0 0 2 4 6 -2 0
Fmjphoenix 2 0 0 0 2 6 9 -3 0

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The South Packerlands 2 2 0 0 0 6 3 +3 6
Chicanada 3 2 0 0 1 7 5 +2 6
Hockey Canada 3 1 1 0 1 7 5 +2 5
Hypocria 3 1 0 1 1 12 12 0 4
Robotopolis 3 1 0 1 1 7 7 0 4
The Mushroom Kingship 3 1 0 0 2 7 6 +1 3
Tanah Burung 3 1 0 0 2 8 8 0 3
Liverpool England 2 1 0 0 1 7 7 0 3
Tonissia 2 1 0 0 1 7 8 -1 3
Bipedal Apes 3 1 0 0 2 9 11 -2 3
Harlesburg 3 1 0 0 2 8 12 -4 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 3 2 0 0 1 12 6 +6 6
Spruitland 3 2 0 0 1 7 5 +2 6
Daistallia 2104 2 1 1 0 0 10 7 +3 5
Krytenia 3 1 1 0 1 14 12 +2 5
Poppuli 3 1 1 0 1 11 12 -1 5
Corneliu 2 1 0 0 1 8 8 0 3
Squornshelous 3 1 0 0 2 3 4 -1 3
Druida 3 1 0 0 2 2 4 -2 3
Formal Dances 3 1 0 0 2 5 8 -3 3
Vilita 3 1 0 0 2 4 8 -4 3
Bettia 2 0 0 0 2 3 5 -2 0

"Otto! We lost again! I'll have your hide for this! Otto! Otto? Now where did he go? Was it something I said?"

Great now he is using his breath to roll the dice over! grrrr

Kalaallit Nunaat 5 - Oliverry 4

"Yes Oliverry lost! My plan worked perfectly!"

"But Kalaallit Nunaat won, an affront to Iansisleans everywhere."

"Perhaps my plan was not as perfect as I had thought..."

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/sportsgazette.jpg


Close win

Squornshelous - Spruitland: 0 – 1

Matchday 3 of Cherry Cup 14 went according to plan for the Spruitland Ice Bunnies, thanks to a Squornshelian team that seemed reluctant to take the win. The Spruitland players did not seem in a very ice hockey-ey mood and the game stayed uneventful and boring for a long time. The Ice Bunnies managed a handful of shots on goal, but none came even close to troubling the Squornshelian goalie.

But with only a few minutes left on the clock, the goalkeeper went for a casual stroll across the ice, presumably to say hello to a young lady in the crowd. Marino Poirot slid the puck into the empty net to give the Ice Bunnies their second win of the tournament. Spruitland thereby stays on schedule in the group stage, with 6 points from three games.

“Yep, so far so good,” coach Coach says. “There’s not a huge difference between winning or losing for us. Either way, we go get wasted after the match. But when we win, there’s more singing and dancing as opposed to arguments and fist fights. Not that the latter isn’t fun, but with so many matches still to go, it’s best to limit the cuts and bruises as much as possible.”

Game Day 4 Results / Tables

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 4 - Lovisa 0
Kericia 4 - Starblaydia 3
Bedistan 3 - Fmjphoenix 4
Euroslavia 4 - Very Angry Rabbits 3
Iansisle 5 - Vtorbetin 1
Oliverry - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 2 - Chicanada 4
Robotopolis 5 - Harlesburg 2
Bipedal Apes 2 - Tonissia 2 (3/1)
T Mushroom Kingship 5 - T South Packerlands 2
Liverpool England 5 - Hypocria 4
Hockey Canada - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 4 - Druida 3
Formal Dances 4 - The Gulf States 5
Poppuli 5 - Daistalia 2104 4
Vilita 5 - Bettia 1
Corneliu 3 - Krytenia 2
Spruitland - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 4 3 0 1 0 21 15 +6 10
Vtorbetin 4 2 0 1 1 12 12 0 7
Euroslavia 4 2 0 0 2 11 10 +1 6
Bedistan 4 2 0 0 2 11 10 +1 6
Iansisle 3 2 0 0 1 10 9 +1 6
Kericia 4 2 0 0 2 5 9 -4 6
Starblaydia 4 1 1 0 2 13 14 -1 5
Lovisa 4 1 1 0 2 9 10 -1 5
Oliverry 3 1 0 0 2 9 7 +2 3
Fmjphoenix 3 1 0 0 2 10 12 -2 3
Very Angry Rabbits 3 0 0 0 3 7 10 -3 0

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Chicanada 4 3 0 0 1 11 7 +4 9
Robotopolis 4 2 0 1 1 12 9 +3 7
The Mushroom Kingship 4 2 0 0 2 12 8 +4 6
Liverpool England 3 2 0 0 1 12 11 +1 6
The South Packerlands 3 2 0 0 1 8 8 0 6
Hockey Canada 3 1 1 0 1 7 5 +2 5
Bipedal Apes 4 1 1 0 2 14 14 0 5
Hypocria 4 1 0 1 2 16 17 -1 4
Tanah Burung 4 1 0 0 3 10 12 -2 3
Tonissia 3 1 0 0 1 10 13 -3 3
Harlesburg 4 1 0 0 3 10 17 -7 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 4 3 0 0 1 17 10 +7 9
Poppuli 4 2 1 0 1 16 16 0 8
Spruitland 3 2 0 0 1 7 5 +2 6
Corneliu 3 2 0 0 1 11 10 +1 6
Vilita 4 2 0 0 2 9 9 0 6
Squornshelous 4 2 0 0 2 7 7 0 6
Daistallia 2104 3 1 1 0 1 14 12 +2 5
Krytenia 4 1 1 0 2 16 15 +1 5
Druida 4 1 0 0 3 5 8 -3 3
Formal Dances 4 1 0 0 3 9 13 -4 3
Bettia 3 0 0 0 3 4 10 -5 0

Joger Elenbogel, a 19 year-old defenseman from the Poppuli's national team has vanished. He was supposed to charter a flight from VAR to Brulin shortly before Monday night, but never showed up. Please if you have any information on the where-abouts please contact VAR or a Tartorian-Nation official.

Bipedal Times

Trans-border newspaper of Republic of Bipedal Apes

Skate-Footers splash and slosh way through Don Cherry Cup of Hockey Championdom

By Bonga

Armed and Hostile Nation of Angry Rabbis – With fourth game of esteemed Don Cherry Cup of Hockeyballs over and done with, Ms. Blatvart, professor of Watersports and head coach of national (not to mention only) hockey team of RBA, told reporters things moving along nicely.

“Would say swimmingly,” she added, “but since hockey played on frozen water, we not really swimming.”

Goalkeeper Longisquama, aspiring actress and high-school student, recruited from alley behind Giant Banana supermarket where she was expertly hitting rats with stick, has steady improved in ability to hit flat hockeyball disc with stick. When asked how playing hockey in big Trans-border hockey championdom competition compares to hitting rats in alley, Lonisquama said, “Is cold on ice. I like alley better. Though alley stinkier.”

After allowing four goals each to Harlesburg and Chicanada in opening matches, Longisquama has kept Skate-Footers close in recent games. Last week, third period ended with three-all draw against Hypocria, and turned into overtime win when center Beetlcrunch sent home slap-shot through legs of Golgoch Blostobov with a minute to go. In most recent outing, Longisquama was helped by great performance from male defender Palsmorton whose effective checks against center Kevin Hobbs and winger Junie Dunleavy ended scoring threats late in third. After allowing only two goals in regulation, Longisquama surrendered a third in OT, but was given victory when right wing Gadzooing exploded for surprise hat trick that had Apes everywhere crying utlpibtyktyrsdxmuynk (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showpost.php?p=9113061&postcount=77) in happy joy.

After four matches, Skate-Footers are placed well back in group on two OT wins and two losses. Leading scorers are as follows:

Gadzooing (right wing) 4 (+3 OT goals)
Beetlcrunch (center) 3 (+1 OT goal)
Banagras (left wing) 3
Palsmorton (defender) 0
Okrawawa (defender) 0
Longisquama (goalkeeper) 0
Ms. Blatvart (coach) 0

That's not supposed to happen!

Surprised Ferrets Outlast Druida

No one was more surprised than the players themselves following a 4-3 scoring fest against Druida. The oddest part was that famous Squornshelan defender/enforcers Krog Dugsk and Wet Biscuit MacGlee recorded goals. These hulking goons normally never even handle the puck, but each found himself with a point to his name after this one. Krog recorded the game's opening goal, when he became extremely angry at the opposing goalkeeper, who he claimed was making faces at him. How Krog could tell behind the mask is irrelevant, but what he did as a result isn't. The closest thing to him was the puck. Krog unleashed a wicked slapshot clocked at 130 mph (208 kmph if you prefer) that slammed straight into the keeper's helmet, knocking him over. the puck bounced straight into the air, and bounced off his helmet again, rebounding into the goal. Druida quickly equalized, when Squornshelan keeper Miika Svenson's girlfriend began yelling at him again, as she did in the previous game, and he was distracted enough to let in a sloppy goal. Druida then capitalized on this distraction for two more quick goals before the young lady was escorted out by security workers. Miika was perfect from then on out. Early in the second period, with the score at 3-1 Druida, Wet Biscuit MacGlee became only the seventeenth Squornshelan player to score by accident. He was busy checking a Druidan player into the boards near the opposing goal, when his stick, held loosely in his left hand, happened to strike the puck. The keeper, who was busy watching his defender being turned inside out, missed the puck with his stick and it trickled in through the five hole.
Playing aggressively for the first time since Cherry Cup 8, although no one knows why, the Ferrets scored a third goal to tie the game with just seconds left in the second period. It was a perfect one timer by Left Winger Ilya Chuko. Ilya told reporters after the game hehad no idea what got into him, but whatever it was, it felt good to slap that puck around. The final goal was also scored by accident. In the final minute of the third period, Druida pulled their keeper, needing a win badly to keep their hopes alive in the 17th Mechanized Infantry Division. in the scramble at the Squornshelan end, Miika Svenson got ahold of the puck and cleared it away from his goal. It caromed once off the boards in front of the penalty box. And while Krog and Wet Biscuit watched from within, it slid into the Druida goal.

Final Score:
Squornshelous 4-3 Druida

Scene: Somewhere in the VAR

Action: A whole bunch of hockey players are doing their own drunken conga line with a man who looks a lot like Jaquee after knocking off the number 1 ranbked Tanah Burung squad.

Dialogue: All are saying "Romp Romp Romp Romp Romp Romp" with a kick on the sixth romp.

That is all from Chicanada ;)

Bettia Enlightener: 1st July 2005 - today's pollen count: off the bloody scale

Icebergs Keep Proud Tradition Alive

Against all odds, Bettia are fast emerging as the darlings of the Cherry Cup due to the unprecedented level of sportsmanship shown to their opponents.

"It's quite simple really," explained team coach John Owen Jones, "we're here to gain some vaulable experience and make some friends in the ice hockey world in the process. And what better way to do that than to deliberately allow your opponants to score more times than you?"

"It's nothing to do with the fact that most of our team hadn't even seen ice skates before coming out here. No, we've been letting the other teams beat us out of the goodness of our hearts."

"We scored twice against Squornshelous, which made us feel really bad inside so we let them score thrice. After that we allowed Formal Dances to gain their only win so far. And then, being jolly good sorts, we allowed Vilita to put five past us. We even scored three of those goals ourselves, just to help them along. Well, we had to really after scoring a goal in the first minute. We wouldn't want to upset anybody."

"Sure, some might say we're throughly imcompetant and only here to make up the numbers. Sure, some of our lads can't work out which way round to put their shirts on. Sure, one or two of them can't even remember the name of that little black thing we're smacking around the ice. But we're here on our own merit, and we'll be a force to reckon with some day. Until then, we continue letting our opponents win on purpose."

Ruden Stu a random Market Anyalist from Harlesburg City HArlesburg
Harlesburg Go Down!
Harlesburg 2 Robotopolis 5

Ruden "What a brass monkey!
Messenger boy "What o earth do you mean sir
Ruden "Well it is simple weve got as much chance of predicting a favourable outcome here as if we could rub a brass Monkey's belly to make the rain start.
Messenger boy "Dont you think thats a bit harsh?
Ruden "No not at all look at where we are look at what weve become were having our worst campaign ever sure weve had losses and sure weve struggled previously and weve had great moments like our first Cherry Cup but there is somethin wonky with the playing field!
Messenger boy "Playing field?
Ruden "Yeah playing field."
Messenger boy "But dont we play on ice?"
Ruden "yes but it can be called a playing field its a figure of speech i dont think we actually play on grass thats just stupid."
Messenger boy"Oh so do you think we can win?"
Ruden"The way things are going well find a new way to lose"
Messenger boy "But surely well get another win somewhere."
Ruden "Im not so sure of that the only way well get more points is if the organisers manage to get some Zombonis on here to clear of all the food stuffs and Octopusses that currently clog the rink"
Messenger boy "Octopusses?"
Ruden "Yeah what do you think it is?"
Messenger boy "Octopi"*Shrugs shoulders*
Ruden "Thats funny next youll be saying we get points for losing games."
Messenger boy "I wouldnt say that Chief but i would say at this stage the only way we will get any competition points is through the bye."
Ruden"The Bye?"
Messenger boy "Yes the Bye but i dont know if we get points for the game off."
Ruden"Thats something for you to look into Derreck

The Armed and Dangerous Warren of
Very Angry Rabbits
Department of Cold Cuts and Cold Sports
Office of the Chair
Committee for Cherry Cup XIV
Save the Dust Bunny Twelve

Memorandum for: Sporting Divisions, Departments, Ministries, Bureaus, Sections, Branches, Sectors, Agencies, What-Have-You of the Don Cherry Cup XIV Participating Nations

Subject: What Is So Difficult About Leaving The Red Buttons Alone, And Staying Off the Blue Lines?

Gentlemen, Ladies, Dwarves, Various Fauna, Fellow Bunnies, Other:

This memorandum, a transcript of the news conference held earlier today by the Director of Operations for the Artic Hares, Otto Matic, is provided to all teams participating in the XIVth Don Cherry Cup. Included with the memorandum is a tape, which was edited together by highly skilled members of the Very Angry Rabbits Security, Intelligence, and Alfalfa Ministry.

Ladies and Gentlemen of the Press. What? What did you say? Oh. Um…and…uh…Bunnies, Dwarves, Various Cartoon Characters, Imaginary Creatures, Mythical Beings, and those clowns from Tanah Burung:

Before we get to the main reason for this press conference, we have a bit of information for you all. It seems Hockey Canada has raised the issue of the fact that in some previous Cherry Cups the names given the playing divisions were actually certain place names, but spelled backwards. This raises the issue of whether or not the divisional names for Cherry Cup XIV are backwards place names. What? Do you have to keep interrupting me? Huh? Ah – yes. Look, that doesn’t mean the names of places that are backwards – just the names of places that…are…backwards…that is, the names are backwards, but the places are named and not backwards. Is that clear? No? Well, think about it. No, I won’t go over it again. Just suffice it to say that - "enruobria dr3” is a very small village located in Very Angry Rabbits vast wild hinterlands. It also happens to be my home town.

Now we have to get on with the real reason for this press conference.

We of Very Angry Rabbits have been, as you will all have to admit, quite up front with you all regarding several simple requirements, to wit:

1. We told you NOT to touch the red buttons on the light posts, on various street corners.

2. We made it extremely clear that "rabbit-related food item" were not to be ordered, or even mentioned, in Edgeburrow restaurants..

3. And we were very clear about the requirement that everyone keep their hands and arms inside the bus, follow the yellow line, and under no circumstances transfer to the blue line.

Ahem! There have been several blatant, if not flagrant…what? NO, not “fragrant” – FLAGRANT! Have your ears cleaned out, will you? What was I…oh, yes. There have been several FLAGRANT, blatant, episodes of…failure to fully cooperate…

Let me provide a little insight in to what I mean. Roll tape!

At this point in the proceedings, the lights were dimmed, and a very large television screen rose up out of the floor behind Otto. The enclosed tape was played. Here follows the stenographers minutes of the tape

The tape shows a group from the Krytenian team -- The head of the HBK, Jack Hackett, meets with Coach Mikkonen somewhere in V.A.R.

JH: RABBITS!

CM: Yes, Jack. Many rabbits. They live here.

JH: RABBITS! FOOD!

CM: Don't eat the natives. We want to qualify this year. Speaking of which, who are we playing first?

JH: GOBSH**ES!

CM: Starblaydia aren't in our group, are they? I'll check....ah, Squornshelous. Easy meat.

JH: MEAT! RABBITS! FOOD!

CM: Now, Jack, I told you not to eat the...oh crap.

----------------

The tape now shows a group from Spruitland - “We’ll just follow the yellow line,” defender Karl Mellick shrugs. “Or was it the blue one? Can’t remember. Oh well, if we get lost, we’ll just press one of them red buttons. That always seems to get someone’s attention. As long as we don’t have to play on a pond again, everything’s fine by us.” Group wanders off on the blue line. We last see a hand reaching for a red button.

----------------------

The tape switches to a scene in the Iansislian locker room --- "I'll be tying random rabbits onto the blue line. Their entire nation must suffer for this travesty!”

--------------------

The tape now shows a Poppulian news conferernce -- “Joger Elenbogel, a 19 year-old defenseman from the Poppuli's national team has vanished. He was supposed to charter a flight from VAG to Brulin shortly before Monday night, but never showed up. Please if you have any information on the where-abouts please contact VAG or a Tartorian-Nation official.”

--------------------

Finally the tape shifts to a Bedistani news conference -- “However, there is something of interest regarding the situation. According to a press release made by the Bedistan Sports Ministry early this morning, the national hockey team's fund has been overdrawn. Significantly. To the tune of þ4.2 million (about US$8.8 million). Officials are tight-lipped regarding where this money may have gone, but speculation is rampant that it might have been used to curry favor from the VAR officials (or "Dice", as they refer to them).”

----------------------

Here the tape ends, and Otto Matic begins speaking again

Well…to address that last bit first, it is a confounded and unfounded rumor…and we would appreciate a meeting after this conference with Bedistani Officials to discuss the exchange rate between Bedistani and Very Angry Rabbitian currencies.

Folks, what you just saw are only several examples of the complete and total disregard we here in Very Angry Rabbits have been experiencing with regard to our very few and simple requests.

Is there someone from Poppuli here? Ah, there you are. Look, the kid – what was his name, Joger Elenbogel? – he walked right up a blue line to a red button, and pushed it.

What?

No, he didn’t push the blue line – he pushed the red button. He’s been in the dungeons ever since. Well, actually, we got him out this morning, and he’s sitting with a nurse and a shrink…er…psychiatrist…in a small, nicely furnished room just across the hall from the entrance to this room. He wont take his fingers out of his ears, and every time someone tries to remove them for him, he screams “NO MORE MANILOW!” and tries to bite them. You can pick him up any time you like – sooner it better for us.

Well…you’ve seen the tapes. We have more, but don’t want to embarrass too many of you. We’ve got citizens disappearing – apparently being eaten in at least some cases. We’ve got complete disregard for the blue line. We’ve got red button pushers, and we’ve also got a few folks sticking hands, or arms, out of the bus.

We can’t have this.

So, here is what we propose.

About the "disappearing" citizens of Very Angry Rabbits - last warning on this, people. You don't want to see how very angry Very Angry Rabbits rabbits can be. And anyone ordering, or mentioning, rabbit-related-food-items in any restaurant will be deported sans judicium.

We are repainting the blue lines. Some will be green, a few purple, and nine will be mauve.

What?

No, I don’t know what mauve looks like. Get some paint swatches.

You will all be allowed the green lines – although it’s quite up to you to deal with the consequences. What consequences, you ask? We don’t like to talk about that. Suffice it to say, you may have serious consequences to deal with – or your survivors may have serious consequences to deal with, depending.

You are asked to stay away from the purple lines. They will be emitting a hazardous haze.

What?

Yes, yes…a purple haze…so what?

As to the mauve lines, as soon as we can determine just exactly what color that is, we will issue further instructions. You are advised that we think you will be much safer off the mauve lines than on them.

Yellow lines will remain yellow in sectors A thru R, but will become Orange in sectors S thru W, and Ecru in sectors X, Y and Z. Ecru is not really a color as far as we can tell, but rather just a belief in a mythical color – therefore, you won’t be able to find the Ecru lines. That’s just as well, believe me.

Red Buttons will be…huh?

I’m getting tired of your interruptions, fella. And, no, we are not talking about the deceased comedian. Look, folks, you’ve gotta keep your cotton pickin’ fingers off the flippin’ red buttons! We have disabled a number of them, and electrified most of the rest as a sort of “last warning” – we don’t think we’ve used a fatal wattage, but…well…we all have different metabolisms and biological whatsisis, don’t we?

So, let’s see…we’ve covered the bit about my little village of “enruobria dr3”…we’ve covered the whereabouts of that kid from Poppuli…we’ve covered the deplorable rumor about possible bribes from Bedistan…we’ve covered the blue lines, the red buttons…what else? There was something else…

Oh, yes. The game schedules. We’ve had several complaints about the venues.

So…

The daily schedule of games has been revised as follows.

The Third Airborne Division will be considered a “3”. The Seventeenth Mechanized Infantry Division will be considered a “1”. The First Armored Division will be considered a “2”.

Every game day from today forward will be sequentially numbered, starting with “1”, then “2”, then “3”, then “1” again, then “2” again, and so on.

On 1 days 1s will be playing the Breakfast Games, 2s will be playing the Lunch Games, and 3s will be playing the Dinner Games.

On 2 days 2s will be playing the Breakfast Games, 3s will be playing the Lunch Games, and 1s will be playing the Dinner Games.

On 3 days 3s will be playing the Breakfast Games, 1s will be playing the Lunch Games, and 2s will be playing the Dinner Games.

Breakfast games will still start at 6:00 every morning, Lunch Games will still commence daily at 12:00, and Dinner Games at 7:30 on the button.

Venues will not change, with each Division playing 5 games each day. These games will be numbered A, 2, C, 4 and Yellow. See previous announcements for what this entails – I personally have no clue.

If this confuses you in any way, we have achieved our goal…er…I mean, we apologize for the inconvenience. You are free to file a complaint and/or inquiry with any of the VAR officials wandering around - you'll be able to recognize them - they're the rabbits with the green armbands, clipboards, and silly little whistles hanging around their necks.

Questions will be fielded by the center fielder for the Mets at their next game.

Thanks for coming.

That is all.

What? I don’t know what a “Met” is – that’s just what they told me to say, Pal.

Cherry Cup XIV Day 5 Results

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 - Kericia 2
Lovisa 4 - Starblaydia 0
Bedistan 1 - Oliverry 4
Fmjphoenix 3 - Vtorbetin 3 (5/3)
Iansisle 3 - Very Angry Rabbits 1
Euroslavia - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 0 - Robotopolis 1
Chicanada 3 - Harlesburg 3 (5/5)
Bipedal Apes 0 - Hockey Canada 2
Tonissia 0 - Hypocria 3
Liverpool England 4 - The South Packerlands 3
The Mushroom Kingship - bye

[u]17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 0 - Formal Dances 3
Druida 2 - The Gulf States 5
Poppuli 0 - Spruitland 5
Daistallia 2104 2 - Krytenia 4
Corneliu 0 - Bettia 0 (2/4)
Vilita - bye


1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 4 0 1 0 26 17 +9 13
Iansisle 4 3 0 0 1 13 10 +3 9
Lovisa 5 2 1 0 2 13 10 +3 8
Vtorbetin 5 2 0 1 2 18 20 -2 7
Oliverry 4 2 0 0 2 13 8 +5 6
Euroslavia 4 2 0 0 2 11 10 +1 6
Bedistan 5 2 0 0 3 12 14 -2 6
Kericia 5 2 0 0 3 7 14 -7 6
Fmjphoenix 4 1 1 0 2 18 18 0 5
Starblaydia 5 1 1 0 3 13 18 -5 5
Very Angry Rabbits 4 0 0 0 4 8 13 -5 0

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Chicanada 5 3 0 1 1 19 15 +4 10
Robotopolis 5 3 0 1 1 13 9 +4 10
Liverpool England 4 3 0 0 1 16 14 +2 9
Hockey Canada 4 2 1 0 1 9 5 +4 8
Hypocria 5 2 0 1 2 19 17 +2 7
The Mushroom Kingship 4 2 0 0 2 12 8 +4 6
The South Packerlands 4 2 0 0 2 11 12 -1 6
Bipedal Apes 5 1 1 0 3 14 16 -2 5
Harlesburg 5 1 0 1 3 18 25 -7 4
Tanah Burung 5 1 0 0 4 10 13 -3 3
Tonissia 4 1 0 0 3 10 16 -6 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 5 4 0 0 1 22 12 +10 12
Spruitland 4 3 0 0 1 12 5 +7 9
Krytenia 5 2 1 0 2 20 17 +3 8
Poppuli 5 2 1 0 2 16 21 -5 8
Vilita 4 2 0 0 2 9 9 0 6
Corneliu 4 2 0 0 2 13 14 -1 6
Formal Dances 5 2 0 0 3 12 13 -1 6
Squornshelous 5 2 0 0 3 7 10 -3 6
Daistallia 2104 4 1 1 0 2 16 16 0 5
Druida 5 1 0 0 4 7 13 -6 3
Bettia 4 0 1 0 3 8 12 -4 2

Otto Matic, Director of Operations for the Artic Hares, slowly opens the door of his office a crack, a peeks out, a worried look on his face. Seeing no one in the hall, he slips quietly out, and posts this notice on the bulletin board just outside his office, then dodges back inside and bolts the door:

Team: We're 5 days into this tournament, guys. Just above this note are todays results, and the current standings. Take a careful look. Notice anything odd? Like, out of thirty-three teams participating in this thing, only one has absolutely no points? NO POINTS AT ALL!!!

It's us, you useless bags of meat! The Old Grey Hare is watching us very carefully, boys. We're hosting this thing, and you dumb bunnies haven't even been able to pull off a draw! Zero points!

Harvey came by after you managed to lose yet another game, and had just one word for me. --- "Hassenpfeffer" ---

Lodge that thought in your tiny little brains, and get your butts out on the ice for a double practice session. That is, if you can remember what game you're supposed to be playing.

Otto

I though you said there was no RP bonus! >.<
Rp to come later.

I though you said there was no RP bonus! >.<
Rp to come later.No RP Bonus is correct. However, I'm deducting points from your score every time you use a "u"...;)

No RP Bonus is correct. However, I'm deducting points from your score every time you use a "u"...;)
The "add forbidden letter here" is an essential part of the english langage.
withot the letter "add forbidden letter here" words like Armo"add forbidden letter here"r would be silly who spells it Armor?
Color
next youll say Lite or Nite
Ive had the most goals scored against me and ive scored the 8th(eq"add forbidden letter here"al with 2 others) most.

Add Rp here too. . >.<

The "add forbidden letter here" is an essential part of the english langage.
withot the letter "add forbidden letter here" words like Armo"add forbidden letter here"r would be silly who spells it Armor?
Color
next youll say Lite or Nite
Ive had the most goals scored against me and ive scored the 8th(eq"add forbidden letter here"al with 2 others) most.

Add Rp here too. . >.<Harly: I'm not really doing that - it's just a joke. ALL the scores are generated by totally random throws of dice. Take a look at VAR - lowest in the bunch.

Harly: I'm not really doing that - it's just a joke. ALL the scores are generated by totally random throws of dice. Take a look at VAR - lowest in the bunch.
you dont say.*add sarcasam here*

Harlesburg Blow an O-Ring
Harlesburg3/5 Chicandia 3/5

Not much can be said about a game which finishes off 3 a piece and then goes into extra time and the score ends 5 apiece.

thats exactly what happened between Harlesburg and Chicandia today the Blades(of Harlesburg(not to be confused with those copycats from fmjphoenix)) battled each other for more than an hour of playing time to suffer this insult.

Coach Barry Melrose of Harlesburg has this to say
"WOw its amazingg yet incredibly frustrating that we could do so much in that game for so long and get such a poor result!
I blame the officials personally its like they left carrots all over the rink and our guys were trying to skate over these things ingame its crazy we were treated like Very Angry Rabbits personel Food mulcher!

What are they trying to do make baby wabbit food for all those little bunnies out there?
Ive got news for them one day some one will make Rabbit Stew out of these guys Aye?!?"

Strong words from Harlesburgs most and least succesful Coach of all time but the question is are his coments backed up or just another rant from a man under pressure?

Facts Harlesburg have one of the highest Goals for records in the 3 Divisions with 18 in fact but on defence they are less than impressive allowing 25 goals and what is the main reason for this?
Simple the little bunnies have failed to clear the Carrots from the rink after each game and period and all the Bunny fans do is throw more down and clog up the lines even more.

Because of this Harlesburg have faced onslaughts of flying Carrots coming from the crowd and from the ice as opposing teams havent had a problem with firing Carrots at the Harlesburg net clogging the lanes and generally using Carrots as a Decoy.

Harlesburg Captain 'Add name here' had this to say
"Its discgusting sure everyone has seen Squid and Octopus hurled onto the ice before a game and we all know of the hats when someone gets a hattrick but Carrots? Whiskey Tango Foxtrot!!THATS THE MOST RETARDED THING IVE EVER HEARD!"

Harlesburg opened the scoring in the 13th minute off a deep shot from Right Wingman 'Cant be arsed looking up his name' which was deflected off one of these Carrots and went in!


The second goal was scored late in the 2nd Period off a faceoff that Harlesburg one and when Some guy tried to dump it into the boards he mistimed it and it hit a carrot late in its path and what happened? goal

The third goal of normal time happened off a short hand break out except it wasnt shorthanded any more as random guy had just got out of the box when the ball was cleared and he retrieved it on his own and after switching the puck he cut the Goaltender in two minds with his skill and scored!
to tie the match up after Chicandia had taken the lead after 3 goals in 5 minute in the end of the 2nd half after Harlesburg's second and early in the 3rd well before Harlesburgs tieing goal.

5 goals were scored in overtime or by penalty shoot out but none is really certain as the extra Vitamins in the Carrots emmited an Anti Radiation that blocked all Camera feeds and the massive piles of Carrots blocked the crowds view for much of the game though they didnt seem to mind as they had a meal to eat.CARROTS!

Harlesburg Goal Scorers
'Cant be Arsed looking up his name'13th min
'Some guy'37th min
'That guy' 59th

In seperate news Harlesburg has voted the Carrot the most insidious Vegetable ever beating off strong contention from the brussel Sprout and Stephen Hawkins..
[/RANT]

Game Day 6 - Scores, and Tables
of the
Harlesburg as Active Participant
Cherry Cup XIV

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 3 - Fmjphoenix 5
Kericia 4 - Iansisle 3
Bedistan 0 - Euroslavia 2
Very Angry Rabbits 0 - Lovisa 3
Vtorbetin 5 - Oliverry 3
Starblaydia - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 4 - Tonissia 5
Robotopolis 3 - Liverpool England 1
Bipedal Apes 1 - The Mushroom Kingship 2
The South Packerlands 0 - Chicanada 5
Hypocria 2 - Hockey Canada 5
Harlesburg - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 2 - Daistallia 2104 3
Formal Dances 1 - Corneliu 0
Poppuli 3 - Vilita 5
Bettia 1 - Druida 2
Krytenia 1 - Spruitland 5
The Gulf States - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 6 4 0 1 1 29 22 +7 13
Lovisa 6 3 1 0 2 16 10 +6 11
Vtorbetin 6 3 0 1 2 23 23 0 10
Euroslavia 5 3 0 0 2 13 10 +3 9
Iansisle 5 3 0 0 2 16 14 +2 9
Kericia 6 3 0 0 3 11 17 -6 9
Fmjphoenix 5 2 1 0 2 23 21 +2 8
Oliverry 5 2 0 0 3 16 13 +3 6
Bedistan 6 2 0 0 4 12 16 -4 6
Starblaydia 5 1 1 0 3 13 18 -5 5
Very Angry Rabbits 5 0 0 0 5 8 16 -8 0

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Chicanada 6 4 0 1 1 24 15 +9 13
Robotopolis 6 4 0 1 1 16 10 +6 13
Hockey Canada 5 3 1 0 1 14 7 +7 11
The Mushroom Kingship 5 3 0 0 2 14 9 +5 9
Liverpool England 5 3 0 0 2 17 17 0 9
Hypocria 6 2 0 1 3 21 22 -1 7
Tonissia 5 2 0 0 3 15 20 -5 6
The South Packerlands 5 2 0 0 3 11 17 -6 6
Bipedal Apes 6 1 1 0 4 15 18 -3 5
Harlesburg 5 1 0 1 3 18 25 -7 4
Tanah Burung 6 1 0 0 5 14 18 -4 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Spruitland 5 4 0 0 1 17 6 +11 12
The Gulf States 5 4 0 0 1 22 12 +10 12
Vilita 5 3 0 0 2 14 12 +2 9
Formal Dances 6 3 0 0 3 13 13 0 9
Daistallia 2104 5 2 1 0 2 19 18 +1 8
Krytenia 6 2 1 0 3 21 22 -1 8
Poppuli 6 2 1 0 3 19 26 -7 8
Corneliu 5 2 0 0 3 13 15 -2 6
Squornshelous 6 2 0 0 4 9 13 -4 6
Druida 6 2 0 0 4 9 14 -5 6
Bettia 5 0 1 0 4 9 14 -5 2

Interesting Stuff (an early ruling found "stuff" admissable):

1. Harlesburg is paying attention.
2. Everyone else is...well...what is the opposite of paying attention? Running up an attention bill?

Halfway (and a little bit) Awards

"We Know Where The Net Is" Award Kalaallit Nunaat: 29 Goals

"We Know How To Hide The Net" Award Spruitland: 6 Goals Against

"We ROMP" Award Spruitland: +11 Goal Differential

"We Get STOMPED" Award Very Angry Rabbits: -8 Goal Differential

"Who Cares, We Got The Points" Award Kalaallit Nunaat, Chicanda, Robotopolis: All with 13 points

"Points - What Are Those?" Award Very Embarrassed Rabbits: 0 points

"This Way To Our Net" Award Poppuli: 26 Goals Against

"Let's Make The Game Exciting" Award Kalaallit Nunaat: 51 total goals scored by Kalaallit Nunaat and their opponents

"Keep The Fans Napping" Award Hockey Canada: 21 total goals scored by Hockey Canada and their opponents

Everyone else is...well...what is the opposite of paying attention? Running up an attention bill?

Starblaydia is...

Trying to think up a way of how his Dwarves - who have been built up as a Hockey-playing race so good that they're semi-mythical - are all of a sudden getting completely random results without referring to 'the use of bloody dice'. Suggestions so far include:

a) Sending Humans, for some reason.
b) Sending two halflings dressed up in a Dwarf's kit per each member of the team, also for reasons unexplained.

Other than that, I'm not paying much attention, no.

Well, losing doesn't seem to work- so we think if the qualify, we think we can actually win in our 6th Cherry Cup.

a) We sent fans, they're just on an inceberg made of beer with a 92 inch plasma TV watching the game.
b) We're paying attention, just not showing it. But the dice has been good, especially the award!

"Keep The Fans Napping" Award Hockey Canada: 21 total goals scored by Hockey Canada and their opponents

Starblaydia is...

Trying to think up a way of how his Dwarves - who have been built up as a Hockey-playing race so good that they're semi-mythical - are all of a sudden getting completely random results without referring to 'the use of bloody dice'. Suggestions so far include:

a) Sending Humans, for some reason.
b) Sending two halflings dressed up in a Dwarf's kit per each member of the team, also for reasons unexplained.

Other than that, I'm not paying much attention, no.um...

c) Something in the water supply in VAR
1 - coincidental
2 - insidiously placed there by "the dice"
3 - insidiously placed there by a nasty opponent
d) Dwarves, it turns out, are allergic to carrots
e) The entire Starblaydian team has been enchanted by [fill in the blank]

;) notice you're a little busy setting up WC XXIV - bon chance

notice you're a little busy setting up WC XXIV - bon chance

There's no RP bonus, and its completely random anyway, so any RPs are purely for the fun/practise of it. And I can't think of anything vaguely worthwhile, so I'm not going to.

And thanks :)

[OOC: I'm still here, just a humongous amount of stuff going on right now, both on and off NS. Hope to be able to get involved here again in the next day or two.]

The Armed and Dangerous Warren of
Very Angry Rabbits
Department of Cold Cuts and Cold Sports
Office of the Chair
Committee for Cherry Cup XIV
Save the Dust Bunny Twelve
Is there someone from Poppuli here? Ah, there you are. Look, the kid – what was his name, Joger Elenbogel? – he walked right up a blue line to a red button, and pushed it.

What?

No, he didn’t push the blue line – he pushed the red button. He’s been in the dungeons ever since. Well, actually, we got him out this morning, and he’s sitting with a nurse and a shrink…er…psychiatrist…in a small, nicely furnished room just across the hall from the entrance to this room. He wont take his fingers out of his ears, and every time someone tries to remove them for him, he screams “NO MORE MANILOW!” and tries to bite them. You can pick him up any time you like – sooner it better for us.

You can keep him. In fact, you can natralize him and he can "help" The VAR National Team. We have no place for an emotionally scarred teenager in our country. Plus, we think he might be a flight risk now. Thank you for your time.

Is there someone from Poppuli here? Ah, there you are. Look, the kid – what was his name, Joger Elenbogel? – he walked right up a blue line to a red button, and pushed it. He’s been in the dungeons ever since. Well, actually, we got him out this morning, and he’s sitting with a nurse and a shrink…er…psychiatrist…in a small, nicely furnished room just across the hall from the entrance to this room. He wont take his fingers out of his ears, and every time someone tries to remove them for him, he screams “NO MORE MANILOW!” and tries to bite them. You can pick him up any time you like – sooner it better for us.
You can keep him. In fact, you can natralize him and he can "help" The VAG National Team. We have no place for an emotionally scarred teenager in our country. Plus, we think he might be a flight risk now. Thank you for your time."What are we gonna do with that kid who went bonkers in the dungeons?"

"You mean that kid from Poppuli - Booger Elephantvogel, or something?"

"Yeah, him. What are we gonna do with him?"

"Where is he now?"

"In the Edgeburrow Institution for the Seriously to Slightly Mentally Challenged."

"Oh. The Nutbin. So, leave him there."

"But, lookit, we've got enough nutcases in there already. And The Old Grey Hare keeps insisting that anybody who pushes a Red Button has to be kept in manacles in the Manilow Dungeon. Soon as he notices this kid aint there, we'll hafta put him back."

"So?"

"If we take this kid with several lose screws out of the nutbin and stick him in a dungeon, it's gonna create an international incident."

"And?"

"Well - that'll just eat up any brownie points we've earned for hosting this ice hockey thing."

"Ah. See your point. Ok, how about this - we have the army fly over Poppuli and shove this kid out of the plane in a parachute, and at the same time have the shrinks over at the nutbin announce that he's escaped?"

"That should work. I'll get right on it."

c) Something in the water supply in VAR

3 - insidiously placed there by a nasty opponent

((I'll volunteer for that one :D.

"Ashlee Langdone's Patent Beard-Be-Gone: Works to Eradicate Dwarves, Civil War generals, and Commander Riker (but only during certain seasons)!"))

Sure, this may have been an off week for The Gulf States hockey team. But now, our country is back on the world scene. We're back and better than ever!

And our fans? Well, they're starting to get pumped about it too. 4-1 and not stopping (much) to lose either.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/sportsgazette.jpg


On schedule, apparently

With two more victories – a smashing 0-5 win against newcomers Poppuli and a slightly-less-but-still-smashing 1-5 win against Krytenia – the Spruitland Ice Bunnies are now nicely in the lead in the 17th Mechanized Infantry Division, though pretty much tied with The Gulf States.

“Yeah, I guess we’re on schedule,” coach Coach says. “That is, for as far as we have a schedule. If we do, I sure as hell can’t figure it out. Bye, no bye, play in the morning, at noon, at night, blue line, yellow line, mauve line… We can’t keep track anymore.”

“We just ignore the schedule and wait for someone to tell us where and when to play. We’ve given a list of our regular bars to a few of those wandering VAR officials, so they know where to find us. So far, we’ve been fairly lucky with the timing. Moderate intoxication is perfect to play hockey – somewhere inbetween a minor buzz and the puking stage. That usually gets us the best results.”

The last two pretty-much-smashing victories turned out to be important, as they played a big part in getting Spruitland on the Halfway (and a little bit) Awards list. The Ice Bunnies won two: the “We ROMP” Award and the “We Know How To Hide The Net” Award, but the players aren’t entirely pleased with that.

“Hell, it’s better than last year,” defender Frank Zandt grunts. “Those Hockey Canadians only gave us one measly award, so two is better - it’s like almost double. But we like awards, so we would rather have won a few more.”

“We do romp indeed,” goalkeeper Ludovic Robins says. “But I must object to that We Know How To Hide The Net Award! We may not always play by the book, but I can assure you, that net does not leave the goal! I object to the accusations that we played without a net, and I will personally file a complaint with the wandering VAR officials!”

Harly: I'm not really doing that - it's just a joke. ALL the scores are generated by totally random throws of dice. Take a look at VAR - lowest in the bunch.
um...

c) Something in the water supply in VAR
1 - coincidental
2 - insidiously placed there by "the dice"
3 - insidiously placed there by a nasty opponent
d) Dwarves, it turns out, are allergic to carrots
e) The entire Starblaydian team has been enchanted by [fill in the blank]

;) notice you're a little busy setting up WC XXIV - bon chance
Wait, how does a dice have a 0? :headbang: I request the VAR officials explain this to me, did Spruitland hide the net again?

Bipedal Times
Trans-border newspaper of the RBA

Great hockeyball tournament also continues

By Bonga

Watership Down, Armed and Dangerous nation of Crazy Rabbis - With Two-Footers doing best to bring pride to nation in run-up to World Cup of Football, Skate-Footers keep trying hardest to hit flat hockeyball while staying upright on ridiculously skinny fins while standing on frozen water. Yes, crazy insane sport of hockey requires players to wear skinny fins on bottom of boots and to play on ice. Lots of ice. So much ice, you never saw that much ice. Like being in frozen arctic with yetis or something.

Be that as may, Skate-Footers making great effort to not embarrass nation. So far, embarrassment belongs mainly to defending champion, at bottom of table, and host nation, at bottom of another table. Skate-Footers not doing well, but for players who never even thought of walking around on skinny metal fins, let alone walking around on skinny metal fins on frozen water, they not doing too badly either.

At last report, side was coming off consecutive extra-time victories over esteemed human nations of Hypocria and Tonissia. Since then things not gone so well, with unsurprising nil-two loss to Hockey Canada (Skate-Footers could hardly expect to defeat nation with hockey in name) followed by one-two loss to fine fungal nation of Mushroom Kingship. Though apes seemed taken aback to be defeated by side of skating portobellos, funguses truly had great command of the ball, singing it about the pitch most expertly. Score differential might well have been greater if not for spore incident in early second period that sent most of first and second Mushroom team to hospital (which referred them to veterinary, which referred them to damp, moist log, which helped them feel much better).

Even against third-team Mushrooms (portobellos having been replaced by odd mixture of buttons and toadstools), apes could manage little offense, aside from offense funguses may have taken at being continually crashed into by slip-sliding apes.

In short, though Skate-Footers seemed to have found their groove, they have lost it again, and if they make it back to RBA in six pieces (seven, including coach), they will be well-off.

"It's not plaid, dammit, it's tartan!"

Sister Hale Maria, coach of the Cassowaries -- who are, lest anyone forget, ranbked first in the world -- was on her 38th consecutive Very Annoying Functionary Rabbit. The damn rodents just kept repeating that plaid was not allowed.

"Look," she explained patiently, for the 38th consecutive time, to the Very Annoying Functionary Rabbit, who was apparently much more senior than the previous 37 Very Annoying Functionary Rabbits. "Look. It's not plaid. This is a perfectly respectable tartan skirt, from a perfectly respectable Catholic girls school. And i am not going to undress here in your Godforsaken sterile air terminal. I'm a nun, and a hockey coach. A very successful hockey coach, in fact."

The Very Annoying Functionary Rabbit, however, continued to insist that a checkered pattern in various colours was, in fact, the dictionary definition of plaid. And there were some forms she could fill out. If she had a problem with that, the Very Annoying Functionary Rabbit suggested, then there was a form for that as well.

With visions of bunny-throttling dancing through her head, Sister Hale Maria tried again. "You see, my dear rabbit, my hockey team is not rankbed first in the entire world because of their skills on the ice. It's not their incredible stickhandling, because most of them just try to use the sticks for water-dousing. It's not their stylish skating, because most of them are only managing to stay upright by closing their eyes and pretending they're on skateboards. And it's not their disciplined ability to get to bed early and wake up refreshed to play a good game of shinny. No, it's definitely not that."

She whacked her ruler across her arm, as the Very Annoying Functionary Rabbit invited her to continue her story.

"The truth is," she continued, "the Cassowaries are just a bunch of drunken louts who can only win hockey games with a good motivational coach. And that, my furry friend, is why you have to let me into your country. Without me, they'll wake up hung over and lose matches to teams i've never heard of, like The South Packerlands. They might even lose to a team of orang-utans, if orang-utans could play hockey."

She giggled at the very thought. Orang-utans on skates.

The Enlightener: 4th July 2005 - today's weather: a bit shit

Bettian Fans Angry Over Poor Performance

There was a near-riot here in VAR as the Bettia Icebergs came crashing to a win against Corneliu. "We came here proudly defending a 0% record, and those bloody Corneliu chappys couldn't even score against us," raged team manager John Owen Jones. "I mean, we even refused to score ourselves just to give them a chance - fat lot of good that did. And then Daffydd the netminder very politely got out of the way during the penalty shoot-out, and they only scored twice! Now our reputation as the most sporting nation in the tournament lies in tatters, and it's all their fault."

However, things got back on track as our boys romped to a 2-1 defeat against the Druida Lightning, leaving us proudly propping up the table.

Wait, how does a dice have a 0? :headbang: I request the VAR officials explain this to me, did Spruitland hide the net again?One simply sets an algebraic formula in place to generate the score from the roll of the die, thus, where "x" equals the roll of the die, and "y" equals the resulting score.

y = x - 1
and, substituting "1" for "x", we get: y = 0

;)

bit of a wise-ass, aint i?

... to generate the score from the roll of the die...

These officials will be collectively known as the “Dice”, and will provide on-ice guidance and bandages, as well as provide the official final result at the end of the game.

Wait, wait, wait. So score determined by rolling officials about ice and not by how many times players hit ball into goal?

Apes not understand this game at all.

"Harvey, what's the Sister Hale Mariah situation?"

"Sister Hail Marie is still being held..."

"No, no, Harvey - not "held" - bad connotation."

"Sorry, your Hareship - er...still being detained..."

"Worse, Harvey - "detained" has "international incident" written all over it"

"Right. Well, then...delayed?..."

"Delayed."

"Delayed. Seems Sister Hale Marionette is trying to enter the country in plaid."

"Where is Plaid, Harvey?"

"Plaid is not a where, Sir, so much as a wear."

"What?"

"Double-U, Ee, Aa, Are, Your Greyness. Sister Hail Martha is attempting to enter the country wearing a plaid skirt."

"Ah! Ha! Aha!"

"Exactly, Sir. Of course, Sister Heel Marushka keeps insisting it's not a plaid skirt, but rather a tartan kilt."

"Hehehehehehehehehehehe!"

"Official 38 has been, shall we say, obtuse about the whole thing. Went so far, I've been told, as to actually show Sister Hale Martina the definition of plaid in a rather large dictionary."

"Oh, this is too much! Harv! Fantastic!"

"Yes, your Olditude."

"Watch it, Harv."

"Sorry, Sir."

"Any chance the RNOTBC will figure out the whole BOP was designed to keep SHM out of VAR during CC XIV?"

"Huh?"

"Any chance the Ranbked Number One Tanah Burung Cassowaries will figure out the whole Ban On Plaid was designed to keep Sister Hale Marika our of Very Angry Rabbits during Cherry Cup Fourteen?"

"Oh. Nah - we've got "Dead Men Don't Wear Plaid" posters plastered up all over the place - everybody's blaming the ban on Steve Martin."

Wait, wait, wait. So score determined by rolling officials about ice and not by how many times players hit ball into goal?

Apes not understand this game at all.Otto Matic stands in a dark corner, slighlty bent over, a mad but gleeful look plastered awkwardly on his face, watching the leadership (if one can use that word in such a context) of the Bipedal Apes team discussing (another possibly questionable word choice) the "Dice".


A nasty little chuckle escapes Otto. And, as he continues rubbing his hands together in a demonic manner, out of his mouth (in Peter Lorres' voice) comes;

"The plan is working! They are even more confused than usual - it that is at all possible. I shall tell Harvey the good news."

With that, Otto slinks theatrically off to find and inform Harvey.

Otto Matic stands in a dark corner, slighlty bent over, a mad but gleeful look plastered awkwardly on his face, watching the leadership (if one can use that word in such a context) of the Bipedal Apes team discussing (another possibly questionable word choice) the "Dice".


A nasty little chuckle escapes Otto. And, as he continues rubbing his hands together in a demonic manner, out of his mouth (in Peter Lorres' voice) comes;

"The plan is working! They are even more confused than usual - it that is at all possible. I shall tell Harvey the good news."

With that, Otto slinks theatrically off to find and inform Harvey.

A man from Hockey Canada steps in Otto's office with a breifcase and in an executive suit. He openes the breifcase containing a document. He shows the document to Otto:

Dear Mr. Matic,

During a crisis that features the questioning of dice, we here at the Hockey Canada Hockey Association have only one thing to do in a situation such as this:

Make things as confusing as possible so it all seems right in the end.

Yours Truly, Muriel Semenko (1892-1979)

Coach Mikkonen: "Dave, what are you doing?"

Dave: "I'm souping up the engines of all the team buses on the other teams in our Division."

CM: "To slow them down? Good thinking!"

Dave: "Actually to speed them up. Soon as the driver hits the accelerator, they're going straight to Ludicrous Speed."

CM: "You don't mean..."

Dave: "Yup, they're gonna go straight to plaid."

ChicanadaSun
Yeah, we like giagantic names.

Kodiaks Preety Much Move On
Lagging in RPs don't kill Chicanada, hold lead in Division

With four games remaining, the Kodiaks are looking good to move on towards the Final 12 Draw, especially after their 5-0 pounding of The South Packerlands today. The win keeps them atop the 3rd Airborne Division group by a scant three goal difference over Robotopolis, who smacked the Kodiaks earlier in the cup.

H'kol, Page 4 girl, said today in moreinteresting news that Jaquee is expected to appeal to the VAR herself (assumablly on some heavy sedatives) to free her gal pal Sister Hale Maria, as the very Sisterly woman was arrested wearin plaid after Tanah's recent struggles in the tourney. oo bad for the #1 ranbked squad in the land, we think.

Kodiaks grand Schedule for CCXIV

Day 1: v Robotopolis (L 0-1)
Day 2: v Bipedal Apes (W 4-2)
Day 3: v The Mushroom Kingship (W 3-2)
Day 4: v Tanah Burung (W 4-2)
Day 5: v Harlesburg (T 5-5)
Day 6: v The South Packerlands (W 5-0)
Day 7: v Liverpool England
Day 8: off date
Day 9: v Hypocria
Day 10: v Tonissa
Day 11: v Hockey Canada

Game Day 7 Results
Don Cherry Cup XIV

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 5-Starblaydia 5(2/0)
Kericia 5 - Fmjphoenix 1
Oliverry 4 - Very Angry Rabbits 2
Euroslavia 1 - Vtorbetin 3
Iansisle 1 - Lovisa 0
Bedistan - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 0 - Harlesburg 1
Robotopolis 4 - Tonissia 0
Hockey Canada 0 - The South Packerlands 4
The Mushroom Kingship 1 - Hypocria 2
Liverpool England 3 - Chicanada 0
Bipedal Apes - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 2 - The Gulf States 3
Formal Dances 1 - Daistallia 2104 3
Spruitland 3 - Bettia 3 (1/3)
Vilita 5 - Krytenia 5 (2/2)
Corneliu 1 - Druida 4
Poppuli - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 7 4 1 1 1 36 27 +9 15
Vtorbetin 7 4 0 1 2 26 24 +2 13
Iansisle 6 4 0 0 2 17 14 +3 12
Kericia 7 4 0 0 3 16 18 -2 12
Lovisa 7 3 1 0 3 16 11 +5 11
Oliverry 6 3 0 0 3 20 15 +5 9
Euroslavia 6 3 0 0 3 14 13 +1 9
Fmjphoenix 6 2 1 0 3 24 26 -2 8
Bedistan 6 2 0 0 4 12 16 -4 6
Starblaydia 6 1 1 0 4 18 25 -7 5
Very Angry Rabbits 6 0 0 0 6 10 20 -10 0

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Robotopolis 7 5 0 1 1 20 10 +10 16
Chicanada 7 4 0 1 2 24 18 +6 13
Liverpool England 6 4 0 0 2 20 17 +3 12
Hockey Canada 6 3 1 0 2 14 11 +3 11
Hypocria 7 3 0 1 3 23 23 0 10
The Mushroom Kingship 6 3 0 0 3 15 11 +4 9
The South Packerlands 6 3 0 0 3 15 17 -2 9
Harlesburg 6 2 0 1 3 19 25 -6 7
Tonissia 6 2 0 0 4 15 24 -9 6
Bipedal Apes 6 1 1 0 4 15 18 -3 5
Tanah Burung 7 1 0 0 6 14 19 -5 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 6 5 0 0 1 25 14 +11 15
Spruitland 6 4 0 0 2 21 12 +9 12
Daistallia 2104 6 3 1 0 2 22 19 +3 11
Vilita 6 3 0 1 2 21 19 +2 10
Krytenia 7 2 1 1 3 28 29 -1 9
Formal Dances 7 3 0 0 4 14 16 -2 9
Druida 7 3 0 0 4 13 15 -2 9
Poppuli 6 2 1 0 3 19 26 -7 8
Corneliu 6 2 0 0 4 14 19 -5 6
Squornshelous 7 2 0 0 5 11 16 -5 6
Bettia 6 0 2 0 4 15 18 -3 4

Harlesburg 0 Carrots 0-Headline from the bye round >.<

Upset? You should be!

After the Harlesburg national team were given a rest for the Bye round in which they basically rested they have come up with another upset this time shocking the pants off all the Peter Rabbits in the crowd and leaving the Bugs Bunnies searching for an Elmer Fudd to chastise.

The Bye round gave Harlesburg time to reasses howw they were going about this their 3rd Hockey campaign and the break in quite possibly and easily argued the best place to have it (just after the half way point) was an excellent opportunity for The Harlesburg Blades to turn things around.


Harlesburg after a slow start to their 3rd Ice Hockey World Cup Championship attempt may very well be back on track to showing the in type of form that got them to the final 16 before finishing a respectable 11th in Cherry Cup 11.
That Cherry Cup was a real eye opener for the people of Harlesburg as the Harlesburg Blades led and Coached by well respected mullet clad genius Barry Melrose swept, iced roughed and slashed their way past the opposition.
However since then Harlesburg have fallen from grace and arguably been put in a position more appropriate for such a young International Hockey nation finishing 20th in CC XII giving them a ranking of 16 for Cherry Cup XIII and now in the depths of the lowest basement of the darkest Dungeons of Hockey ranking systems.

Cherry Cup XIII had one very bright moment for the people of Harlesburg and especially the Team beating Starblaydia by ….to… but now Harlesburg have claimed another big scalp … that of Champions Tanah Burung and they did it in a hard fought battle 1-0.
Harlesburg now sitting on 7 points from 6 matches in the 7th round still have 4 more matches to play and one would hope so as with Wins worth 2 points and draws worth 1 it doesn’t take a Brain Scientist or Rocket Surgeon to work out that Harlesburg has only won two games and drawn once.

The game got off to a shaky start for Harlesburg when after losing the opening face off Tanah Burrung quickly camped in the Harlesburg third applying immense pressure all along the line regaining rebounds and resetting their attack for 3 whole minutes before #1Jorge Oliverier Was finally able to fall on the puck and somewhat control it for the whistle.
Harlesburg cleared through the work of #33 Hurbert Zeleet And avoided the icing by making the Goaltender play at it.

Harlesburg’s first chance came in the 5th minute when #74 Pierre St Laurent(A) Used some exceptional skating to race past his marking man and feed to #8 Harald Fernescu who when one on one with Tanah Burungs Goaltender was found easily mastered as the his shoot was snaffled mid air.
The 1st period ended nil all with Tanah Burung making 14 shots to Harlesburg’s 6 and well in control of the faceoffs by a 40% margin.

The second period was somewhat of a shift in fortunes for Harlesburg when they began to work their way into the game as they started to take control of the centre third of the rink and they did this through some heavy handed and dominating blocking and hitting from Hurbert Zeleet, #27 Louis Eldermane and #63 Batholomew Garnescu
Captain Lefrankie. Led by example as he continuously took Tanah Burung head on in offence and defence when required.

Harlesburgs goal came in the 16th minute of the second period when #27 Kielt Von Kliener Made a lone break down the right and dumped it into the boards to allow the line change but as the defenders came with the puck back up the line #19 Brober O'Shea Came off the bench and checked the puck holder hard sending puck one way and victim the other, Mc’Bride quickly raced onto the puck and took his chance he was quickly supported by Antenescu and the two began their assault on the net Mc‘Bride going forward and Antenescu Holding back Antenescu then came around behind the net as Mc‘Bride Shot but it wasn’t a shot he had passed and Antenescu tapped it in from the side.
Harlesburg 1-0

From here the game changed again but it wasn’t Harlesburg stumbling nor was it accelerating in their performance but more of a determined assualt by the defending Champions and this continued into the 3rd period and seemed relentless but Harlesburg held the champs out.

“Yes I was proud of the boys they played well holding a very strong team scoreless for the entire game sure we had some risky moments there but we get the two points and move a step closer to the leaders on the table but we also leave Tanah Burung languishing behind us.”

Tanah Burung’s performance so far here has been below par and well out of character with their normal dominating performance in Tournaments and even their matches have been missing a full 60 minutes of intensity.

Goal Scorers
Antenescu

Harlesburg Match Fixtures
MD1 Bipedal Apes 3 - Harlesburg 4
MD2 The Mushroom Kingship 5 - Harlesburg 1
MD3 Tonissia 5 - Harlesburg 3
MD4 Robotopolis 5 - Harlesburg 2
MD5 Chicanada 3 - Harlesburg 3 (5/5)
MD6 Harlesburg BYE
MD7Harlesburg 1 Tanah Burung 0
MD8 Hockey Canada Harlesburg
MD9 Harlesburg Liverpool England
MD10 Harlesburg The South Packerlands
MD11 Hypocria Harlesburg

To: The Very Angry Rabbits
From: Chicanada
RE: Jaquee

In light of recent press reports stating that the dreaded Jaquee Moriseete would be arriving to help the cause of the coach from Tanah Burung being coupled with a 3-0 loss to Liverpool England, we wish to let all rabbits of the VAR know that no, Jaquee is not comming to your land and we wish you stop making our press outlets look bad!

Sincererly,

Ian Holmes
Presidum, Federated Cantons of Chicanada

Day 8 Results for Cherry Cup XIV

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 1 - Bedistan 1 (4/5)
Kericia 5 - Euroslavia 3
Oliverry 0 - Fmjphoenix 2
Very Angry Rabbits 1-Vtorbetin 1(4/0)
Iansisle 2 - Starblaydia 5
Lovisa - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 2 - Bipedal Apes 2 (0/1)
Robotopolis 2 - The Mushroom Kingship 3
Hockey Canada 1 - Tonissia 5
The South Packerlands 4 - Hypocria 5
Liverpool England 4 - Harlesburg 0
Chicanada - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 4 - Poppuli 2
Formal Dances 3 - Vilita 5
Spruitland 3 - Daistallia 2104 3 (1/3)
Bettia 1 - Krytenia 5
Corneliu 1 - The Gulf States 3
Druida - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 8 4 1 1 2 41 33 +8 15
Kericia 8 5 0 0 3 21 21 0 15
Vtorbetin 8 4 0 1 3 27 29 -2 13
Iansisle 7 4 0 0 3 19 19 0 12
Lovisa 7 3 1 0 3 16 11 +5 11
Fmjphoenix 7 3 1 0 3 26 26 0 11
Oliverry 7 3 0 0 4 20 17 +3 9
Euroslavia 7 3 0 0 4 17 18 -1 9
Bedistan 7 2 1 0 4 18 21 -3 8
Starblaydia 7 2 1 0 4 23 27 -4 8
Very Angry Rabbits 7 0 1 0 6 15 21 -6 2

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Robotopolis 8 5 0 1 2 22 13 +9 16
Liverpool England 7 5 0 0 2 24 17 +7 15
Chicanada 7 4 0 1 2 24 18 +6 13
Hypocria 8 4 0 1 3 28 27 +1 13
The Mushroom Kingship 7 4 0 0 3 18 13 +5 12
Hockey Canada 7 3 1 0 3 15 16 -1 11
The South Packerlands 7 3 0 0 4 19 22 -3 9
Tonissia 7 3 0 0 4 20 25 -5 9
Bipedal Apes 7 1 2 0 4 18 20 -2 7
Harlesburg 7 2 0 1 4 19 29 -10 7
Tanah Burung 8 1 0 0 7 16 22 -6 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 7 6 0 0 1 28 15 +13 18
Daistallia 2104 7 3 2 0 2 28 23 +5 13
Vilita 7 4 0 1 2 26 22 +4 13
Spruitland 7 4 0 0 3 25 18 +7 12
Krytenia 8 3 1 1 3 33 30 +3 12
Druida 7 3 0 0 4 13 15 -2 9
Squornshelous 8 3 0 0 5 15 18 -3 9
Formal Dances 8 3 0 0 4 17 21 -4 9
Poppuli 7 2 1 0 4 21 30 -9 8
Corneliu 7 2 0 0 5 15 22 -7 6
Bettia 7 0 2 0 5 16 23 -7 4
KEY:
Green - Claimed a spot in the round of 12
Blue - Current Division leaders
Red - Mathematically eliminated

Bipedal Times
Trans-border newspaper of the RBA

Cassowaries defeated by Skate-Footers despite churlish good looks

By Bonga

Mad Rabbiland – Seem like apes have birds’ numbers in Trans-border sporting events. After Two-Footers twice beat Oglethorpia Ostriches in World Cup qualifiers, Skate-Footers last night achieved surprising and inexplicable victory over defending champion and top-ranbked Cassowaries of Tanah Burung in Don Cherry Hockeyball Tournament. This despite heated pre-match debate among Skate-Footer players over definition of “cassowary,” with Banagras, who in real life played by a university student, arguing convincingly that cassowary is kind of wheeled luggage, and former alley-dweller Longisquama claiming it type of bean stew. Coach Ms. Blupotch knew truth though, and showed video that demonstrated highly evolved upright-walking gait of opposing side mascot.

Video, of course, not show cassowary trying to walk on frozen water, and it turns out cassowaries not so good at that, really. When possibly addle-brained esteemed human opponents released caged mascot onto ice, poor bird responded with notable lack of upright-ness and mostly slid in circles while squawking pitifully. When kind Rabbi official removed bird from ice with stern warning to maybe-intoxicated revered human players, pitch had to be rezambonied to remove feathers and cassowary-poop.

Once that done, players took to ice and in usual fashion apes made brave attempt to use sticks for balance, tripod-style. Cassowary opponents seemed somewhat lost and unfocused, playing much like Skate-Footers, but without attendant head-smacks from coach. Through luck, ingenuity, or laws governing random occurrences, each team managed two goals over course of sixty minutes. Skate-Footers’ came in second period during time of advanced chaos in which Cassowary players, attempting to purchase carrot beer from vendor in stands, caused glass partition to collapse, nearly crushing several furry white-and-brown rabbis. As Burungians comically tried to extricated selves from twisted metal, shattered wood, bent Plexiglas, and bunnies, Beetlcrunch and Gadzooing skated (on knees) down to Cassowary goal and tossed ball inside. Although official disallowed this behavior, Cassowaries failed to take possession, and so apes re-executed strategy, this time being careful to manipulate ball using sticks. After one-sided face-off (not attended by Cassowaries), Bipedaleen strikers repeated maneuver, thus achieving two-nil lead over champions.

After Cassowaries finally got act together and returned to ice beers-in-hands, things returned to earlier pattern. During third period, however, outlawed Burungian supporter began chanting inexplicably, “Win it for the Crocs!” which seemed to have galvanizing effect on possibly-alcohol-affected humans. For several minutes thereafter, forwards Onion, Tarantula, and Noire began skating in unison, like team, and with flurry of clever stick-tricks, rapidly equalized. Once rabbis carted away screaming fan, effectiveness of play declined markedly, and was soon crazy boring again. During extra period, sides failed to come alive but thanks to providential melting that ice began to undergo, apes were able to gain enough traction to try running on skateboots. Though this mostly ended in tears, it did give Banagras opportunity to net one goal against sinking Martina.

With third extra-time victory in seven matches, Skate-Footers not quite out of contention in Don Cherry Tournament. But for all intents and purposes, they are on long slide home.

So how does one get a zero on a dice?

So how does one get a zero on a dice?earlier...
Wait, how does a dice have a 0? :headbang: I request the VAR officials explain this to me, did Spruitland hide the net again?and then...

One simply sets an algebraic formula in place to generate the score from the roll of the die, thus, where "x" equals the roll of the die, and "y" equals the resulting score.

y = x - 1
and, substituting "1" for "x", we get: y = 0

;)

bit of a wise-ass, aint i?Like that ;)

earlier...
and then...

Like that ;)
thanks i knew you had answered it early i just couldnt be arsed looking myself and asking the question seemed Easier.

Harlesburg lose
Goal disallowed after video evidence shows it did not cross the line.

Day 9 Results for Cherry Cup XIV

Congratulations to The Gulf States, first team to secure a place in the Round of 12 Semi-Finals !

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 4 - Iansisle 3
Lovisa 0 - Vtorbetin 1
Bedistan 1 - Very Angry Rabbits 0
Euroslavia 4 - Fmjphoenix 1
Starblaydia 4 - Oliverry 2
Kericia - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 0 - Liverpool England 2
Chicanada 2 - Hypocria 3
Bipedal Apes 1 - The South Packerlands 5
The Mushroom Kingship 2 - Tonissia 3
Harlesburg 5 - Hockey Canada 3
Robotopolis - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 1 - Corneliu 1 (1/4)
Druida 1 - Krytenia 4
Poppuli 1 - Bettia 1 (0/3)
Vilita 0 - Daistallia 2104 0 (0/2)
The Gulf States 4 - Spruitland 4 (2/0)
Formal Dances - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 9 5 1 1 2 45 36 +9 18
Vtorbetin 9 5 0 1 3 28 29 -1 16
Kericia 8 5 0 0 3 21 21 0 15
Euroslavia 8 4 0 0 4 21 19 +2 12
Iansisle 8 4 0 0 4 22 23 -1 12
Lovisa 8 3 1 0 4 16 12 +4 11
Starblaydia 8 3 1 0 4 27 29 -2 11
Bedistan 8 3 1 0 4 19 21 -2 11
Fmjphoenix 8 3 1 0 4 27 30 -3 11
Oliverry 8 3 0 0 5 22 21 +1 9
Very Angry Rabbits 8 0 1 0 7 15 22 -7 2

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Liverpool England 8 6 0 0 2 26 17 +9 18
Robotopolis 8 5 0 1 2 22 13 +9 16
Hypocria 8 5 0 1 3 31 29 +2 16
Chicanada 8 4 0 1 3 26 21 +5 13
The Mushroom Kingship 8 4 0 0 4 20 16 +4 12
The South Packerlands 8 4 0 0 4 24 23 +1 12
Tonissia 8 4 0 0 4 23 27 -4 12
Hockey Canada 8 3 1 0 4 18 21 -3 11
Harlesburg 8 3 0 1 4 24 32 -8 10
Bipedal Apes 8 0 3 0 5 19 25 -6 6
Tanah Burung 9 1 0 0 8 16 24 -8 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 8 6 1 0 1 34 19 +15 20
Daistallia 2104 8 3 3 0 2 30 23 +7 15
Krytenia 9 4 1 1 3 37 31 +6 15
Vilita 8 4 0 1 3 26 24 +2 13
Spruitland 8 4 0 0 4 29 24 +5 12
Poppuli 9 2 2 0 5 24 34 -10 10
Formal Dances 8 3 0 0 4 17 21 -4 9
Druida 8 3 0 0 5 14 19 -5 9
Squornshelous 9 3 0 0 6 17 23 -6 9
Corneliu 8 2 1 0 5 20 24 -4 8
Bettia 8 0 3 0 5 20 24 -4 6
KEY:
Green - Claimed a spot in the round of 12
Blue - Current Division leaders
Red - Mathematically eliminated

At the end of divisional play, the top 4 teams in each division will advance to the Semi-Finals.

Semi-Final play will find the 12 advancing teams divided into 2 Groups – Group 1 and Group B – 6 to a group. Group 1 will consists of the top team from each Division, and the 4th team from each Division. Group B will consist of teams 2 and 3 from each division. Each team in each group will play every other team once – 5 gamedays. The top two teams in each Group will advance to the “Nearly-Finals”.

The Nearly-Finals will consist of the top two teams from each Group playing each other once – 3 gamedays. The two teams with that come out on top will play each other in the Finals for Champion and Second Place. The other two teams will play a consolation match for 3rd place and an all expenses paid trip to the other side of the rink.

Throughout the tournament, the game will consist of the usual three periods, with a single overtime period should the game be tied (drawn) at the end of the third period. If the game remains tied at the end of the overtime period, it will officially be recorded as a draw. In the event of a draw in the Finals, a shoot out will take place. In the event that a “tie-breaker” is needed to determine which of two or more teams with exactly the same record move forward, goal-differential will be used. Should that not provide a final result, the two sides will move onto the ice, and have a shoot-out.

ChicanadaSun
Yeah, we like giagantic names.

WHAT THE HELL?
Two Straight Losses Are

First they loose to Liverpool England, who they beat already during their shocking run in Iansisle. Yes, that 3-0 defeat is legit, even though we are all wondering what the hell happend to the squad between their stomping of the South Packlanders and that one.

Now they lose to that *&!#@&()@#*)&#& Hypocria team? Did we miss the voodoo curse that makes the Kodiaks 0-1-3 (including a pathetic 2-0 loss in the u21s) to the Hypocrians? We thought we could at least beat them in hockey!

All of a sudden, the Kodiaks are barely clinging to a playoff slot and somehow have to hold off a pesky Tonissa and hard playing HC to stave off elimination.

And to think, everything had been going so well in the VAR...it's like someone put a hex on us due to fears of evil naughty women who love them some rararas got out into the open...

Kodiaks grand Schedule for CCXIV

Day 1: v Robotopolis (L 0-1)
Day 2: v Bipedal Apes (W 4-2)
Day 3: v The Mushroom Kingship (W 3-2)
Day 4: v Tanah Burung (W 4-2)
Day 5: v Harlesburg (T 5-5)
Day 6: v The South Packerlands (W 5-0)
Day 7: v Liverpool England (L 0-3)
Day 8: off date
Day 9: v Hypocria (L 2-3)
Day 10: v Tonissa
Day 11: v Hockey Canada

Bipedaleen Foreign Ministry would like to make a correction to tables. unfortunately, Skate-Footers have three OT wins, not one regular and two OT, giving them total of 6 standings-points. Thus RBA has been eliminated from contention. Thank you and good night.

The Armed and Dangerous Warren of
Very Angry Rabbits
Department of Cold Cuts and Cold Sports
Office of the Chair
Committee for Cherry Cup XIV
Save the Dust Bunny Twelve

Memorandum for: Sporting Divisions, Departments, Ministries, Bureaus, Sections, Branches, Sectors, Agencies, What-Have-You of the Don Cherry Cup XIV Participating Nations

Subject: Correction to Tables, and Staff

Gentlemen, Ladies, Dwarves, Various Fauna, Fellow Bunnies, Other:

Having checked and doubled checked the results of Game Days One thru Nine, and then having checked them again, it became painfully clear that the honest and above-board representative from Bipedal Apes correctly identified the error that spells their unfortunate elimination from contention for a place in the Semi-Final round.

The tables provided by the VARDOCCACS purporting to display the cumulative results thru the end of Game Day 9 have been corrected.

The Statistician on the VARDOCCACS staff who made the offending entry has been replaced by a dog. Then we shot the dog.

There is a place in the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits that we never speak of by name. It is over-run with...shudder...wolves. And the wolves there live in fear for their lives - of the Yeti (or Sasquatch - or possibley Big-Foot, no one is quite sure). Wolve carcasses dot the landscape. Rabbits, we have it on good authority, are a favorite dessert. Around each wolf carcass can be found a rabbit carcass or two - well, so we are told. We don't go there. Ever.

Except...when banished by The Old Grey Hare. The banished citizen of Very Angry Rabbits is provided a one-way trip to...the place we never mention.

As is the case with the offending scribe...er...statistician who made and published the faulty tables. If it were fawlty towers, that would be one thing - but we will not abide faulty tables.

Apologies, which are in order, are offered.

Sincerely,

Otto
Otto Matic
Director of Operations
Artic Hares

...Bipedal Apes correctly identified the error that spells their unfortunate elimination from contention for a place in the Semi-Final round...

Well, we're in good company here in the cellar. ;)

Well, we're in good company here in the cellar. ;)Sure seems like it to us...

Day 10 Results for Cherry Cup XIV

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 3 - Euroslavia 4
Kericia 2 - Oliverry 1
Bedistan 4 - Iansisle 3
Starblaydia 2 - Very Angry Rabbits 1
Fmjphoenix 3 - Lovisa 4
Vtorbetin - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 4 - The Mushroom Kingship 5
Robotopolis 0 - Hockey Canada 3
Bipedal Apes 0 - Liverpool England 0 (1/0)
Harlesburg 4 - The South Packerlands 0
Tonissia 5 - Chicanada 2
Hypocria - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 3 - Vilita 5
Formal Dances 0 - Spruitland 2
Poppuli 2 - Corneliu 3
The Gulf States 2 - Bettia 1
Daistallia 2104 1 - Druida 1 (2/4)
Krytenia - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 10 5 1 1 3 48 40 +8 18
Kericia 9 6 0 0 3 23 22 +1 18
Vtorbetin 9 5 0 1 3 28 29 -1 16
Euroslavia 9 5 0 0 4 25 22 +3 15
Lovisa 9 4 1 0 4 20 15 +5 14
Starblaydia 9 4 1 0 4 29 30 -1 14
Bedistan 9 4 1 0 4 23 24 -1 14
Iansisle 9 4 0 0 5 25 27 -2 12
Fmjphoenix 9 3 1 0 5 30 34 -4 11
Oliverry 9 3 0 0 6 23 23 0 9
Very Angry Rabbits 9 0 1 0 8 16 24 -8 2

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Liverpool England 9 6 0 0 3 26 18 +8 18
Robotopolis 9 5 0 1 3 22 16 +6 16
Hypocria 9 5 0 1 3 31 29 +2 16
The Mushroom Kingship 9 5 0 0 4 25 20 +5 15
Tonissia 9 5 0 0 4 28 29 -1 15
Hockey Canada 9 4 1 0 4 21 21 0 14
Chicanada 9 4 0 1 3 28 26 +2 13
Harlesburg 9 4 0 1 4 28 32 -4 13
The South Packerlands 9 4 0 0 5 24 27 -3 12
Bipedal Apes 9 0 4 0 5 20 25 -5 8
Tanah Burung 10 1 0 0 9 20 29 -9 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 9 7 1 0 1 36 20 +16 23
Vilita 9 5 0 1 3 31 27 +4 16
Spruitland 9 5 0 0 4 31 24 +7 15
Krytenia 9 4 1 1 3 37 31 +6 15
Daistallia 2104 9 3 3 0 3 33 28 +5 15
Corneliu 9 3 1 0 5 23 26 -3 11
Druida 9 3 1 0 5 19 22 -3 11
Formal Dances 9 3 0 0 5 17 23 -6 9
Squornshelous 10 3 0 0 7 20 28 -8 9
Poppuli 9 2 1 0 6 26 37 -11 7
Bettia 9 0 3 0 6 21 26 -5 6

KEY:
Green - Claimed a spot in the round of 12
Blue - Current Division leaders
Red - Mathematically eliminated

At the end of divisional play, the top 4 teams in each division will advance to the Semi-Finals.

Semi-Final play will find the 12 advancing teams divided into 2 Groups – Group 1 and Group B – 6 to a group. Group 1 will consists of the top team from each Division, and the 4th team from each Division. Group B will consist of teams 2 and 3 from each division. Each team in each group will play every other team once – 5 gamedays. The top two teams in each Group will advance to the “Nearly-Finals”.

The Nearly-Finals will consist of the top two teams from each Group playing each other once – 3 gamedays. The two teams with that come out on top will play each other in the Finals for Champion and Second Place. The other two teams will play a consolation match for 3rd place and an all expenses paid trip to the other side of the rink.

Throughout the tournament, the game will consist of the usual three periods, with a single overtime period should the game be tied (drawn) at the end of the third period. If the game remains tied at the end of the overtime period, it will officially be recorded as a draw. In the event of a draw in the Finals, a shoot out will take place. In the event that a “tie-breaker” is needed to determine which of two or more teams with exactly the same record move forward, goal-differential will be used. Should that not provide a final result, the two sides will move onto the ice, and have a shoot-out.

With great fear of angry armed rabbis, Foreign Ministry regretfully wishes to report accidental life-threatening SNAFU involving tables. It appears that errant non-OT win has snuck back into Bipedal Apes' row in tables, probably as result of butterfly killed in Jurassic era by careless time-travelling scientists. As always, Skate-Footers have no regular-time wins, only (now 4) extra-time wins.

Which bring up interesting question: is there any consolation prize for most OT wins in tournament? Thank you and good night and please don't hit Foreign Minister.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/sportsgazette.jpg


Last group game to decide

After three overtime losses in a row, one thing has become perfectly clear. The Spruitland Ice Bunnies are not at their best in the later stages of the match. Loss of concentration, low stamina, dehydration, all these start to have a serious negative effect on the Ice Bunnies, usually some time in the second period.

“We’ve appealed to a wandering VAR official to make the periods shorter,” coach Coach says. “Three periods of five minutes, that would be ideal for us. With a forty five minute break inbetween. We haven’t heard back from them yet though.”

Some suggests have been made that the Spruitland hockey players might benefit from a bit of training – say, once a week or so? But defender Frank Zandt quickly dismisses that.

“Nonsense, training is for pussies! Besides, how would that help anyway? Training just makes you tired, it makes a lot more sense to be well rested. No no, what we need is a rule change. As they are, the rules are biased. Every time we start a fight, they stop the clock. No wonder we’re so tired at the end of the match, it goes on for hours! Just keep the clock running, and we should be fine.”

Despite the lack of response from the VAR officials to change the length of the periods, the Ice Bunnies did get their act together on Matchday 10, defeating the Formal Dances 0-2. Marino Poirot and Louis Dardenne – ex-figure skaters – scored the goals for Spruitland, pirhouetting through the foxtrotting defense.

The last game in the group stage will now decide whether the Ice Bunnies get to go home soon, or will need to stock up on some more local booze to get through another round. Nobody within the Spruitland delegation seems entirely sure who the team will be playing next, but somebody hinted it might be Druida. If this is indeed the case, then the Ice Bunnies should at least have the higher number of supporters in the crowd.

Well, I need a win and both TMK and Hypocria to lose. Hope I get the lucky sides of the dice for my 1st championship in NS history.

(And this is just round-robin)

With great fear of angry armed rabbis, Foreign Ministry regretfully wishes to report accidental life-threatening SNAFU involving tables. It appears that errant non-OT win has snuck back into Bipedal Apes' row in tables, probably as result of butterfly killed in Jurassic era by careless time-travelling scientists. As always, Skate-Footers have no regular-time wins, only (now 4) extra-time wins.

Which bring up interesting question: is there any consolation prize for most OT wins in tournament? Thank you and good night and please don't hit Foreign Minister.That rotten little scribe...er...statistician somehow managed to escape from...that place we don't ever name, and...

Well - we've fixed it again.

And as for the miscreant scribe...um...statistician...we have this other quaint little custom. First we take a little journey on a ship. Almost any ship will do. Then, about halfway to where ever we're going, we bring out a big board, a blindfold, and a set of manacles.

We call this little game "Walking The Plank".

ChicanadaSun
Yeah, we like giagantic names.

NATIONAL GOV'T BAN DICE
Considered completely coincidental as Kodiaks collapse in that damn Rabbit land

Chicanadans are demanding Jaquee invade the VAR with her love and affection as the Kodiaks continue their most marvelous collapse with a 5-2 loss to the unherald Tonissa. Now they have to win over Hockey Canada (which, at the rate of play won't happen) and need the Mushroom Kingship and Tonissa to both loose in order to make another round.

We're expecting them to come back home tommorow night, if their dismal showing continues.

In other news, the CCXV Bid Committe has began the process of preparing Southampton, which is readying itself to host the NSCL Finals, for the CCXV selection committee. No one is sure of the odds, as many expect Liverpool England and Oliverry to submit hosting bids, but hopes are high.

And in completely differing news, Chicanadan Presidum Ian Holmes has banned dice from the nation for the time being. Holmes released a statement saying the banning was not at all connected to the recent collapse of the National side in hockey.

Kodiaks grand Schedule for CCXIV

Day 1: v Robotopolis (L 0-1)
Day 2: v Bipedal Apes (W 4-2)
Day 3: v The Mushroom Kingship (W 3-2)
Day 4: v Tanah Burung (W 4-2)
Day 5: v Harlesburg (T 5-5)
Day 6: v The South Packerlands (W 5-0)
Day 7: v Liverpool England (L 0-3)
Day 8: off date
Day 9: v Hypocria (L 2-3)
Day 10: v Tonissa (L 2-5)
Day 11: v Hockey Canada

Harlesburg 2 0n the trot!
Chasing the impossibly improbable

Not much can be said in a positive light about Harlesburg when you look at the scores and who they have won and lost against.
Harlesburg have beaten past champions and lost to the Gumby's of the Ice Hockey World.
The Divisional rankings looked like this before the Tournament started:
RANKINGS
1 - Tanah Burung (ranbked 1st)
2 - Hypocria
3 - Robotopolis
4 - Chicanada
5 - Bidpedal Apes
6 – Harlesburg with a “u”
7 – The Mushroom Kingship
8 – Hockey Canada
9 – Liverpool England
10 – Tonissia
11 – The South Packerlands

Tanah Burung was given the 1st Battalion Title in the Division and is also one of the finest Battalions to ever serve in this competition but many times it Forces have been sent head on into the opposition lines and been smacked by the enemy Weapons and been given a right mauling.
Sitting out last mission bit of a disgrace really.

Hypocria was the 2nd Battalion and apears to have more of a nouse and understand the flank is important.Often punches many a hole in the opposition defencive line allowing follow up units to colapse any front.

Robotopolis is preforming as would be expected of such a pedigreed formation and its well armed Companies have knocked away the opposition with its fast tactics.

Chicanada is still in the vanguard of any Airbourne Assault and has droped behind enemy lines so often its becoming boring.

Bidpedal Apes Non existent in fact they went on a mad dash got caught in enemy wire and are now non-existent.

Harlesburg with a “u” Struggles to keep pace with the other Airbourne always trying to plug holes in their defense but often get streched out may be able to flank opposition and enflade them in the rear but not in a gay way...well off the pace but in with a chance.

The Mushy Township are the first Battalion of the 3rd Brigade and so have shown promise in the past surprising everyone with there skill and lack of said skill chasing the pack.

Hockey Cannon-Fodder after hosting the last Tournament are shooting like a bunch of girls and even lost out to Harlesburg better called Cannon-Fodder.

Liverpool England Last of the Battalions in the Brigades but thats where it stops succesfully completed niegh on all missions with little casulties.Rip Split or Bust!

Tonissia have suffered more kills,wounded Prisoners of War and missing in Actions than anyone claiming to have a serious chance of getting into the top four.pity them.
Claims to be the leading Regiment and are taking on their extra Artillary role very well Airbourne Artillary is a special thing and moving it is a mission in its self these guys wont budge.

The Sheep Packerlands send them home they lost to Harlesburg nomore needs to be said...

Last Matches
Day 11:
Hypocria v Harlesburg
Robotopolis v Bipedal Apes
Chicandia v Hockey Cnada
The Mushy Township v Liverpool England
Tonnisia v The Sheepackerlands
Tanah Burung

The previous message was brought to you by The Confederacy Of Harlesburg the number 17 and the letter F.
12345 678910 11 12 ba na na na na na na! :eek: :gundge:

Day 11 Results for Cherry Cup XIV

1st Armored Division
Vtorbetin 5 - Starblaydia 5 (0/1)
Kericia 3 - Bedistan 1
Lovisa 5 - Oliverry 2
Euroslavia 4 - Iansisle 3
Fmjphoenix 1 - Very Angry Rabbits 2
Kalaallit Nunaat - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Hypocria 0 - Harlesburg 2
Robotopolis 3 - Bipedal Apes 5
Chicanada 1 - Hockey Canada 4
The Mushroom Kingship 3 - Liverpool England 0
Tonissia 5 - The South Packerlands 5 (2/5)
Tanah Burung - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Krytenia 4 - The Gulf States 1
Formal Dances 2 - Poppuli 0
Druida 0 - Spruitland 3
Vilita 0 - Corneliu 1
Daistallia 2104 1 - Bettia 4
Squornshelous - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kericia 10 7 0 0 3 26 23 +3 21
Kalaallit Nunaat 10 5 1 1 3 48 40 +8 18
Euroslavia 10 6 0 0 4 29 25 +4 18
Lovisa 10 5 1 0 4 25 17 +8 17
Starblaydia 10 4 2 0 4 35 35 0 16
Vtorbetin 10 5 0 1 4 33 35 -2 16
Bedistan 10 4 1 0 5 24 27 -3 14
Iansisle 10 4 0 0 6 28 31 -3 12
Fmjphoenix 10 3 1 0 6 31 36 -5 11
Oliverry 10 3 0 0 7 28 25 +3 9
Very Angry Rabbits 10 1 1 0 8 18 25 -7 5

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Mushroom Kingship 10 6 0 0 4 28 20 +8 18
Liverpool England 10 6 0 0 4 26 21 +5 18
Hockey Canada 10 5 1 0 4 25 22 +3 17
Robotopolis 10 5 0 1 4 25 21 +4 16
Hypocria 10 5 0 1 4 31 31 0 16
Harlesburg 10 5 0 1 4 30 32 -2 16
Tonissia 10 5 0 0 5 35 39 -4 15
The South Packerlands 10 4 1 0 5 34 34 0 14
Chicanada 10 4 0 1 5 29 30 -1 13
Bipedal Apes 10 1 4 0 5 25 28 -3 11
Tanah Burung 10 1 0 0 9 20 29 -9 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 10 7 1 0 2 37 24 +13 23
Spruitland 10 6 0 0 4 34 24 +10 18
Krytenia 10 5 1 1 3 41 32 +9 18
Vilita 10 5 0 1 4 31 28 +3 16
Daistallia 2104 10 3 3 0 4 34 32 +2 15
Corneliu 10 4 1 0 5 24 26 -2 14
Formal Dances 10 4 0 0 6 19 23 -4 12
Druida 10 3 1 0 6 19 25 -6 11
Bettia 10 1 3 0 6 25 27 -2 9
Squornshelous 10 3 0 0 7 20 28 -8 9
Poppuli 10 2 1 0 7 26 39 -13 8

KEY:
Green - Claimed a spot in the round of 12
Red – did not claim a spot in the round of 12

The Groups (Group 1 and Group B) have self-selected, and will be as follows for the Semi-Finals of Cherry Cup XIV

Semi Final Groups

Group 1
1 - Kericia
2 - Lovisa
3 - The Mushroom Kingship
4 - Robotopolis
5 - The Gulf States
6 - Vilita

Group B
1 - Kalaallit Nunaat
2 - Euroslavia
3 - Liverpool England
4 - Hockey Canada
5 - Spruitland
6 – Krytenia

Semi-Final Game Schedule
Day 1: 1 v 2 // 3 v 4 // 5 v 6
Day 2: 1 v 3 // 2 v 5 // 4 v 6
Day 3: 1 v 4 // 2 v 6 // 3 v 5
Day 4: 1 v 5 // 2 v 4 // 3 v 6
Day 5: 1 v 6 // 2 v 3 // 4 v 5

The Nearly-Finals will consist of the top two teams from each Group playing each other once – 3 gamedays. The two teams with that come out on top will play each other in the Finals for Champion and Second Place. The other two teams will play a consolation match for 3rd place and an all expenses paid trip to the other side of the rink.

http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/vilita/vn/logo.gif
Nooooooooooooooooo!!!!!!!!


-------------------Just when the Ice Cats thought they had done enough to advance to the very oddly formed Semi-Final stage where they still wouldn't know what was going on but knew it had to be good because there were less teams remaining, the unthinkable happened. They Lost!!!!!! Oh for the love of all things holy! Not a loss! Fans of the currently-on-strike Vilitan Hockey League did not know what to do with themselves. First they have to go through the agony of missing out on the entire hockey season... and now this! Their national team knocked out at the last hurdle, in the money all round long just to lose on the final day. All our hopes and dreams crushed by one lonely and seemingly insignificant power play goal 10:32 into the second period. The players have nowhere to go after this, they had not planned on losing. They have no contracts to go back and salivate over, just... nothing. If only there was a way to go back in time and get one more win... one more resu..... what do you want bob?


Sorry to interupt your broadcast sir, but i think it's important

What the bloody hell could be important enough to walk in front of my damn TV camera while I'm live on the air! Get out of the way Bob, I've got a broadcast to do!

But sir, please

Bob, please move before i throw my steaming hot coffee in your little sneevling face.

Fine, I hope you make an ass out of yourself.



Welllll sorry for that interruption folks, and back to the news. While the dreams are over for the Vilitan Hockey team, the Football Team is still going strong as they have advanced to the finals of World Cup 23. Helmut Vilkaous' Jungle Cats will square off against Druida, Lov..........


-- Later That Evening --


Malaket, in here now.

Ah Mr. National, good show tonight, eh?

Malaket, you're fired.

What! i've been working for you for fifteen years! What! I demand an explanation!

Get out, you're fired. Bob's taking your place.


http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/rp/bar.gif
Vilita Ice Cats :: Semi Finals Schedule

G1:: [X-X] - The Gulf States
G2:: [X-X] - Robotopolis
G3:: [X-X] - Lovisa (Again. Again. GO AWAY DAMN LOVISA!)
G4:: [X-X] - The Mushroom Kingship
G5:: [X-X] - Kericia


http://www.dirt-racing.com/3wide/sites/aofiles/rp/bar.gif

ChicanadaSun
Yeah, we like giagantic names.

CHICANADA BOUNCED FROM CCXIV
Nation moves on to CCXV after the fiasco in the VAR

Make way for Jaquee,as the Kodiaks finish their collapse in the Very Angry (and in Jaquee's sights for hugs and kisses and squishing) Rabbits after a rather stupid 4-1 loss to Hockey Canada.

Is it so long ago that Chicanada looked to be a rising star, after it's surprising run in the last two Cups that now it can't play anything resembling defense. Expect Jaquee, regardless of where CCXV is held (preferably a return to Chicanada) to dismantle the whole team and fire the general staff after a very irreprehensible disaster - four straight losses, the most since that ugly CCX tourney.

Kodiaks grand Schedule for CCXIV

Day 1: v Robotopolis (L 0-1)
Day 2: v Bipedal Apes (W 4-2)
Day 3: v The Mushroom Kingship (W 3-2)
Day 4: v Tanah Burung (W 4-2)
Day 5: v Harlesburg (T 5-5)
Day 6: v The South Packerlands (W 5-0)
Day 7: v Liverpool England (L 0-3)
Day 8: off date
Day 9: v Hypocria (L 2-3)
Day 10: v Tonissa (L 2-5)
Day 11: v Hockey Canada (L 1-4)

*ooc: see ya next cucp cycle! ;) and good luck to the remaining 12!*

Well. The Iansisle Gulls have failed to qualify for their first Cherry Cup in longer than most goldfish can remember, just after barely losing to first ranbked Tanah Burung in the previous final. To say that the mood on the Shield was dark would be an understatement: in fact, large rain clouds physically covered most of Iansisle's landmass and thunder was often heard rolling in the distance as second ranbked Iansisle fell before the knockout round.

And every Iansislean knew exactly where to place the blame: on the soft, furry, rather adorable creatures who had hosted this insult to the Shieldian way of life. The revolutionary government in Jameston put out a request that every "rabbit, coney, hare, snowshoe, bunny, cottontail, and any other rodent that does not look adverse to eating carrots between the Marches and the Jaizar be rounded up at once to be hung, drawn, and quartered."

However, initial government sweeps found only two elderly rabbits in Dalenford, one carrot-munching squirrel, and Mr Edgar Coney of 17 East Grand Street. Apparently, the greater part of the Shield's local pint-sized fauna had to urgently make visits to relatives in foreign countries; early reports indicate that their mothers were sick.

Not to be daunted, the government had sentence carried out for the four convicted rabbit sympathizers at dawn the next day - which was dreary and dark. There could never be light on the Shield again. After cheering as the dissected quarters were taken off to be displayed atop Ianapalis' walls, the crowd dispersed, clapping each other on the back and quite satisfied that they had reacted with all the grace under fire and plucky aplomb that characterized the good-sporting Shieldian character even after a disappointment.

We interrupt this program for the following announcement

The position of Director of Operations for the Artic Hares will, effective immediatley, be filled on a temporary basis by Walter Walkarpetink. For the past seven years Walter has been the Assistant to the Deputy of the Vice Director of Operations. In that the Vice Director has been exhiled to --- that place we never mention --- and her Deputy was hit by a bus trying to escap...er...turn himself in, Walter will be filling in until The Old Grey Hare decides what is to be done about the woefully inadequate Artic Hares.

The position is vacant due to the fact that the previous Director of Operations, Otto Matic, has once again gone missing, leaving behind nothing but an odd pile of fluffy clothing that appears to have a cotton tail and long, tapering ears. The police have been unable to determine what, exactly, this object is.

It has been speculated that Mr. Matic's rapid and unannounced departure is in some way linked to the pathetic performance of the Artic Hares under his direction in Cherry Cup XIV, hosted by these self-same hapless and hopeless Hares.

Ruppert the Incompetent has posted a reward of 37,000 Guilders for any information leading to the arrest of Otto Matic.

We now return you to your regularly scheduled program

POX!

Id written up this awesome RP and then Jolt cabbeged out!
and i lost it!

Basically lets all laugh at Hypocira!HA HA

MUSHY TOWNSHIP ARE MY ENEMIES NOW POX on them for winning
and i wished id scored 3 goals not 2. :(
it was great honest..
i might try and recreate it later.

(IC)
The peope of Harlesburg now all incredibly wealthy after the Government used their hard earned money to place a bet on the winners of CCXIII will do so again witht the surplus tax they collect each year and once again this will be divied out to all those taxed!

Do you Love The Duke?
Poll in Harlesburg Results
68% We love him
18% We like him
9 Percent So So
5% hes evil
*The poll has a +/- rating of 5%

5%of the Dukedoms work in Penal Colonies.

This is a Public Service Announcement brought to you by the HBK.

'
(ahem.)

YEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEES!

Thank you.

Next time, we're asking the team doctor. He's a total nutter, on about time-space travel and whatnot, but he's far more coherent.

Ondrea Di Lorenzi, Prime Minister/Dictator-for-life/Surpreme Ruler of the Hockey Playing Communists of Hockey Canada sends this message:

Dear nations remaining in the Cherry Cup:

A BOO YA!!!

Teams we overview:

Kalaallit Nunaat- Time for us to freeze the Iceberg
Euroslavia- Don't know their style, but we should win
Liverpool England- Friends for CoH hosting bid, rivals for Cherry Cup
Spruitland- CC13 flashbacks will only cause the Canucks to think of sweet revenge
Krytenia- Don't know, but meh.

Do a little dance, make a little love. Get down tonight!
She dances as she mails it to Very Angry Wabbits.

Noticing that a trend was starting to form, coach Coach of the Spruitland Ice Bunnies quickly followed suit, and sent out the following message:


CHUG CHUG CHUG!

Give us a holler when we’re up next.

Not to be outdone, and not really understanding what was going on, Walter Walkarpetink, in his new capacity as Acting Director of Operations for the Artic Hares, released the following message:
flop...

Bipedal Times

Trans-border newspaper of the RBA


Skate-Footers screw up on final gameday

Accidentally win without going into extra time


by Bonga


Mad Hattera, Angry Rabbiland - According to revered Bipedaleen statisticians, it had to happen sooner or later, and last night it finally did: in unexpected and unnerving turn of events, Skate-Footers defeated Robotopolis without help of extra time in Don Cherry Cup of Hockey Championness. Result gave RBA sterling 10th-place finish in group, ahead of heavily-favored defending champions Tanah Burung (which team is now believed to have been secretly replaced by metaphors before start of tournament).

Final match and first clean win for Skate-Footers began in standard fashion, with apes stumbling about ice while robotic opponents skated in typical robo-motion, unsuited to ice but unable to fall over thanks to cylindrical bodies and symmetrical three-skate design. With much colliding against rubbish-bin-like opponents, apes quickly ran afoul of officials, and thanks largely to accumulated penalty minutes, robots managed three goals during four-minute five-on-one situation with only poor Okrawawa and Longisquama left to defend.

Once penalty minutes expired, robots began experiencing movement-related difficulties possibly caused by accumulated bits of frozen water in robo-gizzards. As first period expired, robots were moving with little more grace than apes. During break, team robo-trainer attempted to flush robo systems with antifreeze, but when second period began no improvement could be noted. Twenty minutes of very poor hockey followed, by end of which robots had mostly seized up. In fact, three were unable to leave ice, and zamboni had to carefully circumnavigate them while fixing many myriad divots in pitch.

Though no robot players were sent to box, Skate-Footers effectively opened third period up three players. Despite difficulties controlling selves or hockeyball, apes wasted no time in taking advantage of advantage, expertly flailing about in open space created by limited number of mobile opposing players. Trio of forwards cooperated to move ball toward robot goal repeatedly, eventually scoring five times before exasperated official blew whistle and ended game. With great celebratory joy, Skate-Footers escaped Land of Angry Rabbis intact, and hightailed it (though apes have no tails, of course) for nearest banana boat back to RBA.

Moi starts a trend.
YEAH HAW!!!!!

Big Word(s) of the Day:

Electric Boogaloo

Semi – Finals, Day 1

Group 1
Kerica 1 - Lovisa 2
The Mushroom Kingship 3 - Robotopolis 1
The Gulf States 0 - Vilita 2

Group 1
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Mushroom Kingship 1 1 0 0 0 3 1 +2 3
Vilita 1 1 0 0 0 2 0 +2 3
Lovisa 1 1 0 0 0 2 1 +1 3
Kericia 1 0 0 0 1 1 2 -1 0
Robotopolis 1 0 0 0 1 1 3 -2 0
The Gulf States 1 0 0 0 1 0 2 -2 0

Group B
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 - Euroslavia 2
Liverpool England 1 - Hockey Canada 0
Spruitland 2 - Krytenia 0

Group B
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 1 1 0 0 0 5 2 +3 3
Spruitland 1 1 0 0 0 2 0 +2 3
Liverpool England 1 1 0 0 0 1 0 +1 3
Hockey Canada 1 0 0 0 1 0 1 -1 0
Krytenia 1 0 0 0 1 0 2 -2 0
Euroslavia 1 0 0 0 1 2 5 -3 0

"We lost to Liverpool England?"

"We took off the second L in Liverpool, but it only made people laugh."

"Yes, nothing could spell hijinks like Liverpoo England on the scoreboard."

"We also lost."

"I am aware of that- how could we?"

"We wanted to lose the tournement sir, from now on we have no goalie in our lineup."

"Excellent, now all we need to do is keep the puck out fo the other team's net."

"How do you plan to do that sir?"

"We send old, retired people to play for us."

"The Old-Flyers sir?"

"How about that team we had way back in 1924 when we nearly won that tournement?"

"I'll dig them up sir."

An announcement from the bath tub of Bi Kikere, people's representative for territorial defence & sports:

Something seems to have gone terribly wrong. Terribly terribly wrong.

Many of you had thought that the Cassowaries, who play their football on a small ice surfance known as a rink, would repeat as champions in the sport of ice hockey. After all, they were ranbked number one after winning the last installment of the Cherry Cup, which to the disppointment of many players turned out not to be a receptacle for cerise liqueur, but rather a enormous jock strap emblazoned with a picture of Otto Mattic giving the finger.

Possibly this was not the original Cup. Investigations are under way as to whether the original Cup may still be under lock and key in some frozen gulag where people are forced to listen to the musical stylings of Inuit folk singers. I make no accusations at this time against President Aglukark, whose throat singing i find enchanting and who really fills out a whalebone corset nicely.

I do, however, want to say to the esteemed hosts of this rather oddball tournament that there was no need to taunt the Cassowaries, who were after all operating without the expert assistance of their Pharmacis... er, their coach, Sister Hale Maria. Viz:

Tanah Burung - bye

Now, i appreciate a good taunt as much as the next octegenarian, but i do believe those Very Irritating Rabbits were laughing at our brave girls and boys and hideous spidery things. And after all we considered doing for them, before we decided not to, since their pissante little country isn't worth a pitcher of the yellow stuff that comes out of my nose. Oh, did i say that out loud? I'm sorry, i have a cold.

Speaking of pitchers, Alberto, could you bring me another mug of that divine Mastadon-enriched Porterhouse? Ah, yeah, that's the stuff. Now as i was saying, the Cassowaries have failed to set the hockey world on fire. I've decided to take a page out of the book of our former nemesis, Starblaydia and those charming metallic things that also appear to be quite good at hockey, and field an entirely non-human team in the next Cup. Non-humans wishing to apply for citizenship will of course have their applications dealt with expeditiously, which is to say that they will be personally rubber-stamped by the Acting Coordinator of Citizenship & Emergency Baptisms, Sister Hale Maria. The funding to train a new squad shall be provided by the Entire GNP of Iansisle division of Mau Slurp Enterprises Pty. Ltd.

I now present the final statistics for the outgoing Cassowary squad. May they enjoy their retirement janitorial stipends.

Wins: one! Hurrah!
Losses: nine.
Player-games lost to hangovers: 74.
Player-games lost to severe alcohol poisoning: 12.
Player-games lost through ill-conceived attempts to body-check enormous steel-clad robots: 3.
Player-games lost while researching what a "Kodiak" is: 1.
Goals scored: 20.
Goals scored while sober: 3.
Goals hallucinated by Cassowary skaters: 19.
Total goals Cassowaries believe they scored: 39.
Goals allowed: 29.
Ranbks lost through poor performance: TBA.
Coaches fired: zero. This may surprise some, but the authorities have decided not to penalize the coach, who was after all detained at the airport throughout the entire tournament. We have full confidence in Sister Hale Maria's abilities and are confident she will lead the next Cassowary squad to a fine performance rather than to the alternative, which is (not to put too fine a point on it) a long spell in the salt mines.

G3:: [X-X] - Lovisa (Again. Again. GO AWAY DAMN LOVISA!)


:) hehe yeah again in football and in icehockey. Its amaizing always in draw we are in the same group. Damn. oh You hate me for that?? :)

BTW. We are very happy we win in first match. hooooooooray. :)

ooc: Semi-Final Schedule:
Day 2 will be posted in about 2 1/2 hours.
Day 3 will be posted tomorrow (12 July)
Day 4 will be posted Wednesday (13 July)

There will be an unavoidable delay (unless I can avoid it) between Day 4 and Day 5 of the Semi-Finals. I will probably not be able to access a PC either Thursday or Friday.

Day 5 will be posted Saturday (16 July) note: on this day the armed and dangerous warren of very angry rabbits will be 54 years old. gack!

The Nearly Finals will be posted as follows:
Day 1 - 17 July (Sunday)
Day 2 - 18 July (Monday)
Day 3 - 19 July (Tuesday)

The Consolation Game (3rd and 4th Place) will be posted 20 July (Wednesday)

The Final (1st and 2nd Place) will be posted 21 July (Thursday)

VAR may have to skip CC XV. I will be in total technoligcal free-fall from Sunday 24 July thru Sunday 31 July. Techno level roughly 1870 (Camping. Miles from nowhere. Deep woods. Tents. BIG mosquitos. and like that.)

Cherry Cup XIV Semi – Finals, Day 2

Group 1
Kericia 0 - The Mushroom Kingship 3
Lovisa 1 - The Gulf States 4
Robotopolis 4 - Vilita 3

Group 1
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Mushroom Kingship 2 2 0 0 0 6 1 +5 6
Vilita 2 1 0 0 1 5 4 +1 3
The Gulf States 2 1 0 0 1 4 3 +1 3
Robotopolis 2 1 0 0 1 5 6 -1 3
Lovisa 2 1 0 0 1 3 5 -2 3
Kericia 2 0 0 0 2 1 5 -4 0

Group B
Kalaallit Nunaat 4 - Liverpool England 4 (5/3)
Euroslavia 4 - Spruitland 4 (2/5)
Hockey Canada 5 - Krytenia 0

Group B
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 2 1 1 0 0 14 9 +5 5
Spruitland 2 1 1 0 0 11 6 +5 5
Hockey Canada 2 1 0 0 1 5 1 +4 3
Liverpool England 2 1 0 0 1 8 9 -1 3
Euroslavia 2 0 0 0 2 8 14 -6 0
Krytenia 2 0 0 0 2 0 7 -7 0

Cherry Cup XIV Semi – Finals, Day 3

Group 1
Kericia 0 - Robotopolis 2
Lovisa 5 - Vilita 2
The Mushroom Kingship 1 - The Gulf States 0

Group 1
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Mushroom Kingship 3 3 0 0 0 7 1 +6 9
Lovisa 3 2 0 0 1 8 7 +1 6
Robotopolis 3 2 0 0 1 7 6 +1 6
The Gulf States 3 1 0 0 2 4 4 0 3
Vilita 3 1 0 0 2 7 9 -2 3
Kericia 3 0 0 0 3 1 7 -6 0

Group B
Kalaallit Nunaat 3 - Hockey Canada 0
Euroslavia 0 - Krytenia 0 (1/2)
Liverpool England 0 - Spruitland 2

Group B
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 3 2 1 0 0 17 9 +8 8
Spruitland 3 2 1 0 0 13 6 +7 8
Hockey Canada 3 1 0 0 2 5 4 +1 3
Liverpool England 3 1 0 0 2 8 11 -3 3
Krytenia 3 0 1 0 2 2 8 -6 2
Euroslavia 3 0 0 0 3 9 16 -7 0

Cherry Cup XIV Semi – Finals, Day 4

Group 1
Kericia 2 - The Gulf States 5
Lovisa 5 - Robotopolis 1
The Mushroom Kingship 2 - Vilita 4

Group 1
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Lovisa 4 3 0 0 1 13 8 +5 9
The Mushroom Kingship 4 3 0 0 1 9 5 +4 9
The Gulf States 4 2 0 0 2 9 6 +3 6
Vilita 4 2 0 0 2 11 11 0 6
Robotopolis 4 2 0 0 2 8 11 -3 6
Kericia 4 0 0 0 4 3 12 -9 0

Group B
Kalaallit Nunaat 1 - Spruitland 0
Euroslavia 3 - Hockey Canada 4
Liverpool England 2 - Krytenia 2 (1/0)

Group B
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 4 3 1 0 0 18 9 +9 11
Spruitland 4 2 1 0 1 13 7 +6 8
Hockey Canada 4 2 0 0 2 9 7 +2 6
Liverpool England 4 1 1 0 2 11 13 -2 5
Krytenia 4 0 1 0 3 4 11 -7 2
Euroslavia 4 0 0 0 4 12 20 -8 0

Excellent. 2 win and now first place. go go "Bizony'.
its very good positon to advance to next round.

And I beat You Vilita ;) first time I thing but not to last.

Day 9 Results for Cherry Cup XIV

Congratulations to The Gulf States, first team to secure a place in the Round of 12 Semi-Finals !

1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 4 - Iansisle 3
Lovisa 0 - Vtorbetin 1
Bedistan 1 - Very Angry Rabbits 0
Euroslavia 4 - Fmjphoenix 1
Starblaydia 4 - Oliverry 2
Kericia - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 0 - Liverpool England 2
Chicanada 2 - Hypocria 3
Bipedal Apes 1 - The South Packerlands 5
The Mushroom Kingship 2 - Tonissia 3
Harlesburg 5 - Hockey Canada 3
Robotopolis - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 1 - Corneliu 1 (1/4)
Druida 1 - Krytenia 4
Poppuli 1 - Bettia 1 (0/3)
Vilita 0 - Daistallia 2104 0 (0/2)
The Gulf States 4 - Spruitland 4 (2/0)
Formal Dances - bye

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 9 5 1 1 2 45 36 +9 18
Vtorbetin 9 5 0 1 3 28 29 -1 16
Kericia 8 5 0 0 3 21 21 0 15
Euroslavia 8 4 0 0 4 21 19 +2 12
Iansisle 8 4 0 0 4 22 23 -1 12
Lovisa 8 3 1 0 4 16 12 +4 11
Starblaydia 8 3 1 0 4 27 29 -2 11
Bedistan 8 3 1 0 4 19 21 -2 11
Fmjphoenix 8 3 1 0 4 27 30 -3 11
Oliverry 8 3 0 0 5 22 21 +1 9
Very Angry Rabbits 8 0 1 0 7 15 22 -7 2

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Liverpool England 8 6 0 0 2 26 17 +9 18
Robotopolis 8 5 0 1 2 22 13 +9 16
Hypocria 8 5 0 1 3 31 29 +2 16
Chicanada 8 4 0 1 3 26 21 +5 13
The Mushroom Kingship 8 4 0 0 4 20 16 +4 12
The South Packerlands 8 4 0 0 4 24 23 +1 12
Tonissia 8 4 0 0 4 23 27 -4 12
Hockey Canada 8 3 1 0 4 18 21 -3 11
Harlesburg 8 3 0 1 4 24 32 -8 10
Bipedal Apes 8 0 3 0 5 19 25 -6 6
Tanah Burung 9 1 0 0 8 16 24 -8 3

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 8 6 1 0 1 34 19 +15 20
Daistallia 2104 8 3 3 0 2 30 23 +7 15
Krytenia 9 4 1 1 3 37 31 +6 15
Vilita 8 4 0 1 3 26 24 +2 13
Spruitland 8 4 0 0 4 29 24 +5 12
Poppuli 9 2 2 0 5 24 34 -10 10
Formal Dances 8 3 0 0 4 17 21 -4 9
Druida 8 3 0 0 5 14 19 -5 9
Squornshelous 9 3 0 0 6 17 23 -6 9
Corneliu 8 2 1 0 5 20 24 -4 8
Bettia 8 0 3 0 5 20 24 -4 6
KEY:
Green - Claimed a spot in the round of 12
Blue - Current Division leaders
Red - Mathematically eliminated

At the end of divisional play, the top 4 teams in each division will advance to the Semi-Finals.

Semi-Final play will find the 12 advancing teams divided into 2 Groups – Group 1 and Group B – 6 to a group. Group 1 will consists of the top team from each Division, and the 4th team from each Division. Group B will consist of teams 2 and 3 from each division. Each team in each group will play every other team once – 5 gamedays. The top two teams in each Group will advance to the “Nearly-Finals”.

The Nearly-Finals will consist of the top two teams from each Group playing each other once – 3 gamedays. The two teams with that come out on top will play each other in the Finals for Champion and Second Place. The other two teams will play a consolation match for 3rd place and an all expenses paid trip to the other side of the rink.

Throughout the tournament, the game will consist of the usual three periods, with a single overtime period should the game be tied (drawn) at the end of the third period. If the game remains tied at the end of the overtime period, it will officially be recorded as a draw. In the event of a draw in the Finals, a shoot out will take place. In the event that a “tie-breaker” is needed to determine which of two or more teams with exactly the same record move forward, goal-differential will be used. Should that not provide a final result, the two sides will move onto the ice, and have a shoot-out.
1st Armored Division
Kalaallit Nunaat 3 - Euroslavia 4
Kericia 2 - Oliverry 1
Bedistan 4 - Iansisle 3
Starblaydia 2 - Very Angry Rabbits 1
Fmjphoenix 3 - Lovisa 4
Vtorbetin - bye

3rd Airborne Division
Tanah Burung 4 - The Mushroom Kingship 5
Robotopolis 0 - Hockey Canada 3
Bipedal Apes 0 - Liverpool England 0 (1/0)
Harlesburg 4 - The South Packerlands 0
Tonissia 5 - Chicanada 2
Hypocria - bye

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Squornshelous 3 - Vilita 5
Formal Dances 0 - Spruitland 2
Poppuli 2 - Corneliu 3
The Gulf States 2 - Bettia 1
Daistallia 2104 1 - Druida 1 (2/4)
Krytenia - bye



Code:

1st Armored Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 10 5 1 1 3 48 40 +8 18
Kericia 9 6 0 0 3 23 22 +1 18
Vtorbetin 9 5 0 1 3 28 29 -1 16
Euroslavia 9 5 0 0 4 25 22 +3 15
Lovisa 9 4 1 0 4 20 15 +5 14
Starblaydia 9 4 1 0 4 29 30 -1 14
Bedistan 9 4 1 0 4 23 24 -1 14
Iansisle 9 4 0 0 5 25 27 -2 12
Fmjphoenix 9 3 1 0 5 30 34 -4 11
Oliverry 9 3 0 0 6 23 23 0 9
Very Angry Rabbits 9 0 1 0 8 16 24 -8 2





Code:

3rd Airborne Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Liverpool England 9 6 0 0 3 26 18 +8 18
Robotopolis 9 5 0 1 3 22 16 +6 16
Hypocria 9 5 0 1 3 31 29 +2 16
The Mushroom Kingship 9 5 0 0 4 25 20 +5 15
Tonissia 9 5 0 0 4 28 29 -1 15
Hockey Canada 9 4 1 0 4 21 21 0 14
Chicanada 9 4 0 1 3 28 26 +2 13
Harlesburg 9 4 0 1 4 28 32 -4 13
The South Packerlands 9 4 0 0 5 24 27 -3 12
Bipedal Apes 9 0 4 0 5 20 25 -5 8
Tanah Burung 10 1 0 0 9 20 29 -9 3





Code:

17th Mechanized Infantry Division
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Gulf States 9 7 1 0 1 36 20 +16 23
Vilita 9 5 0 1 3 31 27 +4 16
Spruitland 9 5 0 0 4 31 24 +7 15
Krytenia 9 4 1 1 3 37 31 +6 15
Daistallia 2104 9 3 3 0 3 33 28 +5 15
Corneliu 9 3 1 0 5 23 26 -3 11
Druida 9 3 1 0 5 19 22 -3 11
Formal Dances 9 3 0 0 5 17 23 -6 9
Squornshelous 10 3 0 0 7 20 28 -8 9
Poppuli 9 2 1 0 6 26 37 -11 7
Bettia 9 0 3 0 6 21 26 -5 6



KEY:
Green - Claimed a spot in the round of 12
Blue - Current Division leaders
Red - Mathematically eliminated

At the end of divisional play, the top 4 teams in each division will advance to the Semi-Finals.

Semi-Final play will find the 12 advancing teams divided into 2 Groups – Group 1 and Group B – 6 to a group. Group 1 will consists of the top team from each Division, and the 4th team from each Division. Group B will consist of teams 2 and 3 from each division. Each team in each group will play every other team once – 5 gamedays. The top two teams in each Group will advance to the “Nearly-Finals”.

The Nearly-Finals will consist of the top two teams from each Group playing each other once – 3 gamedays. The two teams with that come out on top will play each other in the Finals for Champion and Second Place. The other two teams will play a consolation match for 3rd place and an all expenses paid trip to the other side of the rink.

Throughout the tournament, the game will consist of the usual three periods, with a single overtime period should the game be tied (drawn) at the end of the third period. If the game remains tied at the end of the overtime period, it will officially be recorded as a draw. In the event of a draw in the Finals, a shoot out will take place. In the event that a “tie-breaker” is needed to determine which of two or more teams with exactly the same record move forward, goal-differential will be used. Should that not provide a final result, the two sides will move onto the ice, and have a shoot-out.

We just lost 2 points, how'd that happen?

Poppuli:

Day 1 - Poppuli 0 – The Gulf States 5 : A loss
Day 2 – Poppuli 2 – Druida 0 : A win
Day 3 – Poppuli 5 – Krytenia 5 / OT Poppuli 4 – Krytenia 2: An Overtime win
Day 4 – Poppuli 5 – Daistalli 2104 4: A second win
Day 5 – Poppuli 0 – Spruitland 5 : A second loss
Day 6 – Poppuli 3 – Vilita 5 : A third loss
Day 7 – Poppuli bye
Day 8 – Squornshelous 4 – Poppuli 2: A fourth loss
Day 9 – Poppuli 1 – Betti 1 / OT Poppuli 0 – Bettia 3: A fifth loss
Day 10 – Poppuli 2 – Corneliu 3: A sixth loss
Day 11 – Formal Dances 2 – Poppuli 0: A seventh loss

Teams will earn 3 points for a win in regulation, 2 points for a win in overtime (including shoot-outs if necessary) and 1 point for games that end in a draw.
7 losses, 2 wins, 1 OT win. 3 pts per win, 2 pts per OT win, 1 pt per Draw.
(2 x 3) + (1 x 2) = 8.

In correcting the tables, I corrected away credit for a third win, but gave you credit for a draw instead of an overtime win. Fixed. Sorry.

ooc: Semi-Final Schedule:
Day 2 will be posted in about 2 1/2 hours.
Day 3 will be posted tomorrow (12 July)
Day 4 will be posted Wednesday (13 July)

There will be an unavoidable delay (unless I can avoid it) between Day 4 and Day 5 of the Semi-Finals. I will probably not be able to access a PC either Thursday or Friday.

Day 5 will be posted Saturday (16 July) note: on this day the armed and dangerous warren of very angry rabbits will be 54 years old. gack!

The Nearly Finals will be posted as follows:
Day 1 - 17 July (Sunday)
Day 2 - 18 July (Monday)
Day 3 - 19 July (Tuesday)

The Consolation Game (3rd and 4th Place) will be posted 20 July (Wednesday)

The Final (1st and 2nd Place) will be posted 21 July (Thursday)

VAR may have to skip CC XV. I will be in total technoligcal free-fall from Sunday 24 July thru Sunday 31 July. Techno level roughly 1870 (Camping. Miles from nowhere. Deep woods. Tents. BIG mosquitos. and like that.)ooc: There will be no results posted tomorrow (14 July 2005). I will probably be able to post the 5th Game of the Semi-Finals on 15 July 2005. If so, everything gets moved up 1 day. If not - everything stays as per above schedule.

Cherry Cup XIV Semi – Finals, Day 5

Group 1
Kericia 1 - Vilita 1 (3/3)
Lovisa 0 - The Mushroom Kingship 2
Robotopolis 0 - The Gulf States 2

Group 1
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
The Mushroom Kingship 5 4 0 0 1 11 5 +7 12
The Gulf States 5 3 0 0 2 11 6 +5 9
Lovisa 5 3 0 0 2 13 10 +3 9
Vilita 5 2 0 1 2 15 15 0 7
Robotopolis 5 2 0 0 3 8 13 -5 6
Kericia 5 0 0 1 4 7 16 -9 1

Group B
Kalaallit Nunaat 2 - Krytenia 5
Euroslavia 4 - Liverpool England 0
Hockey Canada 4 - Spruitland 4 (1/1)

Group B
Team P W OTW D L GF GA GD Pts
Kalaallit Nunaat 5 3 1 0 1 20 14 +6 11
Spruitland 5 2 1 1 1 18 12 +6 9
Hockey Canada 5 2 0 1 2 14 12 +2 7
Krytenia 5 1 1 0 3 9 13 -4 5
Liverpool England 5 1 1 0 3 11 17 -5 5
Euroslavia 5 1 0 0 4 16 20 -4 3

Moving on to the Nearly Finals are The Mushroom Kingship and The Gulf States from Group 1, and Kalaallit Nunaat and Spruitland from Group B

How bad dice has screwed us over:

Remaing teams:

The Mushroom Kingship: Absolutely no posts this whole tournement and advancing in 1st place, proof that dice can screw teams like Starblaydia and Robotopolis and give clueless Mushrooms a championship. 6 tries and nothing to show for it for me while TMK has 2 tries and a semi-final birth.

The Gulf States: 4 posts isn't bad, but when you see that they beat out teams like Vilita and Robotopolis for the semis. Proof that dice didn't help.

Kalaallit Nunaat & Spruitland: With KN's experience, you'd expect this. Spruit is new, and lucky- especially with the dice beating out both LE and I.

All ooc:

But hasn't it been fun? ;)

Personally, don't much care if i'm first or almost-last, although i'd have set it up so that elimination for many arrived a bit later on, cuz it's all about playing the game, winning being irrelevant. (All future threats to put rabbits into large stewing pots will be tongue in cheek.) Also, The Gulf States has been with us since CC1, despite missing a few Cups in the middle. Long overdue for a lucky break, i'd say.

http://i5.photobucket.com/albums/y197/Spruitland/sportsgazette.jpg


In the semis again!

Despite playing with slightly less intensity and with somewhat reduced enthusiasm from sports fans – who largely seemed to favor watching the many Spruitland football matches over ice hockey – the Ice Bunnies have managed to sneak into the Semi Final for the second time in a row, thereby proving they are not a “one hit wonder.”

There have been a few close calls though. It took a last-matchday-win over Druida to ensure Spruitland of a spot in the Semi Final group stage thing. (note: this is not the same as the Semi Finals, which the Very Angry Rabbits are calling the Nearly Finals, just to keep everyone confused. Not the keen Spruitland press though, who can see right through this sorta thing, and will just continue to refer to the Semi Finals as the Semi Finals, like they should be called.)

So yeah, anyway, Spruitland made it to the (not quite) Semi Final Groups, and again had to wait until the final matchday of that stage to clinch a spot in the (real) Semi Finals. Kalaallit Nunaat had already taken the top spot in the group, and a match between Spruitland and Hockey Canada had to decide which of the two would join them in the (not Nearly, but) Semi Finals. And the Ice Bunnies quite satisfyingly held the Hockey Canadians to a 4-4 draw, knocking them out of the tournament for the second time in a row, pretty much at the same stage as last time.

Nobody within the Spruitland delegation is exactly certain who they’ll be playing next, or where, or when, but it looks like it could be The Mushroom Kingship. Despite a surprisingly strong performance by the mushrooms, who seem much better at gliding on ice than kicking a ball across a grass field, the Ice Bunnies are not concerned. Except for goalkeeper Ludociv Robins, that is, who might be sitting out the Semi Final on account of a spore allergy.

Regardless, after a fourth place in Cherry Cup 13, the Spruitland hockey team is determined to come away with a trophy this time. Whether it’s the big one for first place, the smaller one for second, or the pathetic one for third doesn’t matter much, just as long as they don’t end in fourth place again.

3rd place in second round. not bed. we will be playing better in next edition.

thanks everyone. \o/

The Schedule for the Nearly Finals of Cherry Cup XIV

Day 1
The Mushroom Kingship v Kalaallit Nunaat
The Gulf States v Spruitland

Day 2
The Mushroom Kingship v Spruitland
The Gulf States v Kalaallit Nunaat

Day 3
The Mushroom Kingship v The Gulf States
Kalaallit Nunaat v Spruitland

The results of the first set of games in the "Nearly Finals" of Cherry Cup XIV are posted below:

The Mushroom Kingship 3 - Kalaallit Nunaat 3 (4/3)

The Gulf States 2 - Spruitland 3

Spruitland - 1 win - 3 points
The Mushroom Kingship - 1 overtime win - 2 points
Kalaallit Nunaat - 1 loss - 0 points (GD = -1, Goals For = 7)
The Gulf States - 1 loss - 0 points (GD = -1, Goals For = 2)

Communique from Foreign Ministry of RBA to esteemed Don Cherry host-nation, human land of Angry Rabbits
(not Rabbis as we originally believed)

For dissemination on 7/16

Dear bunnies, on this esteemed anniversary in the history of your nation, RBA wishes you many happy returns.

Thank you and good night.

Communique from Foreign Ministry of RBA to esteemed Don Cherry host-nation, human land of Angry Rabbits
(not Rabbis as we originally believed)

For dissemination on 7/16

Dear bunnies, on this esteemed anniversary in the history of your nation, RBA wishes you many happy returns.

Thank you and good night.Thank you very much. We are, today, a nation of Very Happy Rabbits.

Druida fan #1: "So how're we doing?"

Druida fan #2: "We as in Druida, or we as in Hockey Canada?"

Druida fan #1: "As in Druida."

Druida fan #2: "Out, I'm afraid."

Druida fan #1: "Oh. What about Hockey Canada, then?"

Druida fan #2: "Out too."

Druida fan #1: "Oh. Well... who's left, then?"

Druida fan #2: "Spruitland..."

Druida fan #1: "Uhuh."

Druida fan #2: "...The Gulf States..."

Druida fan #1: "Uhuh."

Druida fan #2: "...Kalaallit Nunaat..."

Druida fan #1: "Uhuh."

Druida fan #2: "...and The Mushroom Kingship."

Druida fan #1: "Uhu... wait a minute, who did you just say?"

Druida fan #2: "The Mushroom Kingship."

Druida fan #1: "Um... I hope you don't mind me asking, but... uh... who are they?"

Druida fan #2: "Well I don't really know, but they don't seem to be too popular amongst some folk."

Druida fan #1: "Oh. Only I can't say I've seen many of their fans out and about."

Druida fan #2: "Indeed."

Druida fan #1: "Hang on... why don't we be their fans?"

Druida fan #2: "But we're Druida's only two fans?"

Druida fan #1: "Yeah, but they suck. Just think, we might even be on to a winner! The only two The Mushroom Kingship fans!"

Druida fan #2: "Good idea! But just for the rest of this cup, yeah."

Druida fan #1: "Oh, of course... for we are Hockey Canadian..."

OFFICIAL COMMUNIQUE
from the desk of Susan Aglukark
Queen of Kalaallit Nunaat, Iansisle and Her Other Dependencies
Vanquisher of Ziotah, Scourge of the Heathen Dwarf, Founder of All Things Cherry

The Queen wishes to congratulate her beloved Iceberg for its stately progress into the final four. It now seems almost certain that the Cherry Cup will return once more to its rightful home. Rejoice!

The Queen congratulates all teams for taking part and having the wisdom to lose to Greenland's finest. Good for you! The Queen also extends her benevolence to the Very Angry Rabbits for not only hosting with such applomb but also having the grace to lose so many games. Well played, Rabbits! In token of this, the Queen has declared a one-day moratorium on leg-hold traps for use on arctic hares, and will forego her usual meal of steamed rabbit, stuffed with chopped rabbit. She hasn't decided what to have instead. Maybe a salad.

The Queen is less pleased at this "Mushroom Kingship." They have played well. They have exceeded expectations. Their proper role now is to be crushed by the Iceberg. Having the audacity to win is unacceptable. The Queen decrees that mushrooms and other fungoid life forms are henceforth banned from her Kingdom and Dependencies. She also informs the world that their claims to royalty are without foundation. They are pretenders. The Queen cautions the Mushroom Commonship that if they do not begin to lose immediately, they shall be punished. She knows just the pesticide to use, too, so don't tempt her.

The Gulf States and Spruitland are also congratulated on advancing this far. The Queen reminds them that now the time has come to be crushed under the bulk of the Red and White Iceberg. She further reminds The Gulf States that she knows where they live and has a large army poised in Nunavut just itching for some action. She has no idea where Spruitland is, but warns the Spruitlanders that she has jsut bought a new atlas and knows how to use it. The Queen's vengeance is swift and terrible.

Lastly, the Queen congratulates Greenland coach Lance A. Comte, and proclaims that he has been named Duke of Ivigtut, Godspisse and the Isles. Rejoice!

also the queen commands you to sign up for cc15 at http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=432430

Cherry Cup XIV Day 2 Nearly Finals Results

The Mushroom Kingship 4 - Spruitland 0
The Gulf States 5 - Kalaallit Nunaat 3


The Mushroom Kingship: 1 win, 1 overtime win --- 5 points
The Gulf States: 1 win, 1 loss --- 3 points (GD = +1)
Spruitland: 1 win, 1 loss --- 3 points (GD = -3)
Kalaallit Nunaat: 2 losses --- 0 points

Kalaallit Nunaat']OFFICIAL COMMUNIQUE
She further reminds The Gulf States that she knows where they live and has a large army poised in Nunavut just itching for some action.

Um... you do know that I control Nunavut right? So... get your armies off my lands and we'll pretend that never happened.

-------------

We come back to Toronto as the masses are having a rally downtown for The Gulf States Peliceans. People from all around the country have appeared to show support for the team, which is in the first Cherry Cup semifinals in the past 7-9 cups. We can't remember the last time TGS did so well in the tournament, but it's about time we've finally started to get good.

There's been some controversy as to how the tournament's been run. There's some controversy about how we've benefited from that. It's strange how we went from a pitiful team to the 1st round points leader overnight. But hey, we've been working for several cups now and it's about time we've had this breakthrough.

One more game remains in the semifinals, against relatively newcomer Mushroom Kingship. They currently lead in the standings with 5 points in the Semis. However, a win against TMK would give The Gulf States a definte chance to appear in the finals and get a shot for the Cup.

The fans all around The Gulf States and it's territories meanwhile have finally come back around to cheering on the team. National pride and team excitement has hit an all time high. Then again, the casual fans (sheep) have woken up once we started doing really good.

Um... you do know that I control Nunavut right? So... get your armies off my lands and we'll pretend that never happened.First - the Queen of KN is always making outrageous statements and demands. They are a result of her serious mental condition - known as Ego Humongous - which we simply allow, and for the most part ignore.

Second - VAR controls a couple of VERY old, dormant nationstates with sizeable armies. We like to let them all just rest and hang about. But they are available should they be needed. In general, we take a leaf from the book of an old friend, and just toss a shoe at whoever is being boisterous and bellicose.

;)

Game 3 Cherry Cup XIV Nearly Finals

The Mushroom Kingship 0 - The Gulf States 1
Kalaallit Nunaat 2 - Spruitland 1

The Gulf States - 2 wins, 1 loss -- 6 pts
The Mushroom Kingship - 1 win, 1 ot win, 1 loss -- 5 pts
Kalaallit Nunaat - 1 win, 2 loses -- 3 pts (GD -2)
Spruitland - 1 win, 2 loses -- 3 pts (GD -4)


Consolation Match: Kalaallit Nunaat vs Spruitland
FINALS: The Mushroom Kingship vs The Gulf States

Completely ooc, but that's just one title game I would have never expected.

Chicanada congratulates the Mushroom Kingship and the Gulf States on their finlas matchup!

Completely ooc, but that's just one title game I would have never expected.

Chicanada congratulates the Mushroom Kingship and the Gulf States on their finlas matchup!
Drunken Rage in Harlesburg
man loses shoe.

After the results of the nearly finals came in today fro VAR it became apparent that it was a wise move for the Government not to use the 'Peoples' money to once again place betson who would be the overall victor of the Final matches.

With the final matchesturning out like this....

The Mushroom Kingship 0 - The Gulf States 1
Kalaallit Nunaat 2 - Spruitland 1

The Gulf States - 2 wins, 1 loss -- 6 pts
The Mushroom Kingship - 1 win, 1 ot win, 1 loss -- 5 pts
Kalaallit Nunaat - 1 win, 2 loses -- 3 pts (GD -2)
Spruitland - 1 win, 2 loses -- 3 pts (GD -4)


Consolation Match: Kalaallit Nunaat vs Spruitland
FINALS: The Mushroom Kingship vs The Gulf States

The Mushroom Kingship vs The Gulf States in the final both paying exorburent prices for an overall victory anyone to have picked them would have been off their rocker.
But in a cruel twist both teams are in the final and with both teams paying out at 80:1 originally to win the damn thing and now paying $1.40 for The Mushroom Kingship and The Gulf States coming in at $1.80 2/3rds of a cent it is a real nut.

Harlesburg bookies are backing Mushroom Kingship but only by a slight margin and The Harlesburg Government is to place 60% of their Tax 'Surplus' on the team equating to roughly $34,560,000,000,000 Dollars this could break the Treasury but luckly the people always get more money next year and with recent success in picks a failure here could be covered.

ROYAL DECREE
Armed and Dangerous Warren
of
Very Angry Rabbits
Free the Dust Bunny Twelve

Be it Announced and Known Throughout the Land:

In light of recent indications from several of the governments of the teams participating in Don Cherry Cup XIV that they are, to one degree or another, displeased with some or all of the results of the Tournaments' games

- AND -

In light of indications from several of the aforementioned governments that they are extremely displeased with the behaviour of, and many of the decisions of, the Dice during the Tournaments' games

- AND -

In light of indications from several of the aforementioned, and other, governments to the effect that "something ought to be done".

- AND -

To ensure that peace, law and order, and domestic tranquility are maintained in the land.

Be it herefore and henceforth and in other officious sounding ways decreed and ordained that:

1 - The Armed Forces of the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits are placed on immediate Alert, and will be prepared to mobilize on a two hour notice to provide any required assistance to civil authorities.

2 - All leave/holiday for members of Police Forces is canceled effective immediately.

C - Civil Authorities will ensure double coverage at all sporting events, non-sporting events, and grocery stores, until further notice or until the third Thurday of the next month with a "V" in it, whichever comes first.

4.7 - Alternate side of the street parking is in effect.

E - Curfew for all citizens over the age of 21 is 11:11 PM. For those under the age of 21 it will be 11:05 PM. There is, by process of elimination, no curfew for those who happen to be exactly 21. Curfew for all foreign nationals, except for those who are part of an Ice Hockey Team participating in Cherry Cup XIV, will be 11: 07 PM. Curefew for members of Foreign Ice Hockey teams will be announced on a day-to-day basis.

6.g - Didn't we tell you NOT to push the Red Buttons?!?!

7 - Gatherings of more than 16 million people (or any other sentient, or semi-sentient, or semi-conscious beings) are prohited.

H - Martial Law is in effect. For those who have never taken a martial arts class, "Martial" and "Marital" are not the same word mis-spelled.

9 - Oh, and my brother Ruppert, The Incompetent, just reminded me that I'm the one who imprisoned the Dust Bunny 12 in the first place, so please ignore that part of the heading of this decree, okay?

THE OLD GREY HARE
Autocratic Monarch
And Numismatist

Druida's (now The Mushroom Kingship's) only two hockey fans are awaiting the finals between their new side and The Gulf States inside the arena...

Druida fan #1: "Who'd've thunk it, eh? Us at the Cherry Cup finals!"

Druida fan #2: "Well, when you consider the number of nations we've actually been through to get ot this stage, it's about time one of them made it!"

Druida fan #1: "So who is it we're following again? Hockey Canada?"

Druida fan #2: "No, that was last cup. This cup, it's The Mushroom Kingship."

Druida fan #1: "Oh."

Druida fan #2: "Was the fact that we're both dressed as huge mushrooms not a giveaway to you? We're not exactly going to be The Gulf States, are we?"

Druida fan #1: "Well... uh..."

Druida fan #2: "Anyway, 'we' just lost to The Gulf States, so a revenge victory would be great."

Druida fan #1: "Uh... fantastic."

Druida fan #2: "It is... you don't sound that enthusiastic about it, though?"

Druida fan #1: "Well, it's just that I miss Druida."

Druida fan #2: "But... we can't go back to Druida. We're Hockey Canadian The Mushroom Kingship followers."

Druida fan #1: "Yeah, but are we? Really?"

Druida fan #2: "What do you mean, are we really?"

Druida fan #1: "Well, it just seems so fake, flitting from team to team, following whoevr we fancy. I mean, it's no wonder the Druida team did so badly. All they had following them were three lost tourists from Liverpool England. The Lightning need us. I mean, who are this lot, anyway?"

Druida fan #2: "They need us too, they've got no-one else! And look at us! How the hell else are we supposed to get away with these outfits?"

Druida fan #1: "They might need us, but we're not theirs, are we? Come on. Let's leave them be."

Druida fan #2: "But we're... we're... we could be winners!"

Druida fan #1: "We're Druidans. We're not supposed to be winners."

And with that, Druida fan #1 slunks out of the arena, still dressed in his mushroom costume. Probably the saddest man in a mushroom outfit you're ever likely to see. And now, Druida's only hockey fan.

To: adminstrator of stuff or otehr relevant official, Very Angry Rabbits

The people's representative office for sports & territorial defence has heard of various military threats against your nation. While there are some in this office who would like nothing better than to see your entire warren comsumed in the righteous fire of revenge-driven nations, sober second thought has convinced us this might possibly be contrary to the principles of international law. Therefore we would like to offer you the assistance of our entire overseas strike force to aid in the defence of your nation.

The overseas strike force consists of Tima Santos, an eight-year old girl with occasional asthma flare-ups, her father Marcelino, who is quite keen to see foreign countries on the taxpayer's dime, and a dog named Rudolph. Tima is armed with a garden rake and a rag doll which may or may not contain anthrax virus. Marcelino is a pacifist and only has one arm, but he has been known to hold up large groups of people through the creative use of profanity. He is a member of the Church of Great Snark (pbuh). As for Rudolph, it's possible that he has rabies. He certainly has a very cranky disposition and has been known to wake the neighbours by howling too loudly.

We trust this will be of some assistance in deterring attack, and will of course welcome any trade concessions you wish to extend by way of thanks for our help. (Or you could just throw Rudolph a bone.) By the way, Mau Slurp's House of Gambling has informed us they will be betting "the entire GNP of Iansisle" on The Gulf States to win it all. Since Iansisle owes Mau Slurp two entire GNPs, he can easily afford to lose one. And think of the payoff if he should win!

Kisses,
Alvin Chi'p-moenhnk
Department of Sports-related international incidents

Somewhere in comfort and security of RBA, two CFA bigwigs sat watching strange talking picture-box that Two-Footers had squandered pooled banana sterlings on while side was in Oglethorpia for World Cup qualifying match.

Sounds was buzzy, and wherever picture was coming from, it was snowing there.

"Those rabbis angry about foreign governments giving them lip over hockey tournament," said Ms. bigwig #1.

"They planning to invade somebody," agreed Ms. bigwig #2.

"They not said anything about invading," corrected bigwig #1.

"They got bees there?"

"Huh?"

"Bees. Those little yellow bugs that sting you if you eat their flowers."

"They got bees where?"

"In Angry Rabbiland."

"Dunno. It winter there, I know that."

"What that buzzing?"

The bigwigs paused to listen closely to the box.

"Bees."

"Bees. Definitely."

"Glad I didn't have to go to Rabbiland. Poor Ms. Blupotch, I bet she got all stung."

"Good thing none of hockey team was anybody important."

"They all dead now?"

"Dunno. Prolly, with all the bees and snow."

"We better tell all the players, if they ever go to--"

"What players?'

"All players."

"All what players?"

"All players in Republic of Bipedal Apes Consolidated Footie leagues!"

"Oh, those players."

"Who else you think I mean?"

"Thunk you meant dead hockey players."

"No point telling them anything, they dead."

"Yeah."

"Right."

"So go on."

"What I was saying?"

"Dunno. Something about telling the players."

"Oh, yeah. We better tell players if they ever go play footie in Angry Rabbiland they shouldn't whine and whine and whine about results. Makes rabbis mad."

"Don't blame them. Rabbis work hard to make sure tournament kosher."

"Yeah, we should smack hockey team in head for complaining."

"Except they're dead."

"Well, what they do with bodies? Maybe we can find 'em and smack 'em posthumously."

"Ugh. That disgusting."

"Sometimes doing right thing is diusgusting."

"Maybe instead of digging up dead hockey players and hitting 'em, we could get government to apologize to rabbis for complaining about their officials."

"Maybe...."

Memorandum

From Foreign Ministry of RBA
To: Armed, dangerous and sprightly rabbis of Angry Rabbiland
Subject: Officiating in Don Cherry Cup of Hockey Championness

Dear Ms. Hare and associated bigwigs,

Is with great sorrow and humble apologies that we undertake to apologize for any comments made by RBA citizens, sporting philosophers, or others which may have offended or displeased your graces. All hockey players and supporters throughout RBA enjoyed Don Cherry Cup and look forward to visiting your esteemed nation and engaging in popular pasttime of red-button pressing. Please to forgive any offence.

Thank you and good night.

To: Alvin Chi'p-moenhnk
Apparent Charge D'Affairs, Department of Sports-related international incidents
Tanah...

* - How many "G"s in "Burung", Theodore?
- Two, I think.
- Where do they go?
- Where does who go?
- The "G"s, Theodore. Where do the "G"s go?
- What "G"s?
- The two "G"s in "Burung".
- Are there two "G"s in "Burung"?

...Burung (please pardon our failure to include the 2nd "G", should a second "G" actually be required to spell "Burung". We don't seem to know exactly where to put it, and have decided instead to leave it out and enclose a raspberry)

Sir and/or Madam: The Armed and Dangerous Very Angry Rabbits who constitute the Armed and Dangerous Military Forces of The Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits have managed to confuse themselves with this opening sentence and have decided to abandon it and try again just a little further down the page.

Ahem.

We of the Defense Forces of the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits are pleased to accept the assistance offered by our friends...

* - Theodore, give me a synonym for "friend"
- I don't have any cinnamon.
- Synonym.
- Ah. That. Why?
- Why? 'Cause we're talking about Tanah Burung here.
- Where?
- Theodore!
- 'Kay. Um...Pal. Amigo. Compadre. Chum.
- Chum! Doesn't "Chum" have another meaning, Theodore?
- Yup.
- Well?
- Huh?
- WHAT is the other meaning, Theodore!
- Oh. Chum is the chopped up fish scrap stuff lunatics who want to attract sharks toss over the side of a boat.
- That'll do.

...offered by our chums from Tanah Burung (*see above apology regarding number of "G"s in Burung). We are sure the assistance of the Tanah Burungian Overseas Strike Force will do much to deter the occurance of any unfortunate incidents.

Please ask Tima Santos to station herself along our northern border. We suggest you use words of one or fewer syllables in the operation order, to make sure she will understand. Her father, Marcelino, would probably be of most help on our east coast, as it is completely inaccessible due to a series of reefs and cliffs. Should Marcelino wish to tour the local area, we can have someone come by and lend him a bicycle.

We ask that Rudolph the potentially rabid mutt...er...dog...be stationed along our southern border. On hearing this plan we received a request from the citizenry in the area, which we would like to honor, asking that he (she? one heistates to take these things for granted) be somehow restrained. A good sturdy chain has been suggested.

A bone has been acquired and will be provided.

We cannot condone the activites of Mau Slurp's House of Gambling, as gambling is illegal in the Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits, and will be happy to take between 50 and 75 percent of the bet.

As to trade concessions.

Did you notice that nothing followed that statement? Good.

Once again (or perhaps for the first time, we can't remember if we've said it already and can't be bothered to read what we have already written - after all, we've already written it) thank you for the assistance in maintaining order.

Sincerly,

* - Is that spelled right, Theodore?
- I dunno. I can't spell worth a tinkers damn.
- Oh. Well, I guess it'll have to do.
- What?
- What, what?
- What will it have to do?
- Shut up, Theodore.

The Armed and Dangerous Armed Forces of The Armed and Dangerous Warren of Very Angry Rabbits (both of us)

To: The Esteemed Foreign Minister of the Republic of Bipedal Apes
Bipedal Apes Foreign Ministry
Republic of Bipedal Apes
And such

Your Esteemed and Honored Two Footed Self, Sir (and/or Ma’am, as the case may be):

On receipt of your apology, we scratched our collective heads – which had several unforeseen consequences, not the least of which was serious dandruff fallout, which may account for a certain lack of quality in your televiewing.

We can’t recall any Bipedal Apian Ways that offended us.

We apologize for that outlandish pun, but since this memorandum is being prepared for delivery out of our land…consider this the apology for the second inexcusable pun.

We appreciate your kind words, knowing as we do how difficult it is for you to string a couple of them together into some sort of an intelligible message. That you went to that extreme to send us a well written, well phrased, semi-literate apology for an offense you failed to commit in the first place meant a lot to us.

Enclosed please find a Television Set in working order. We suggest you replace the one you seem to have acquired from a traveling salesman with little repute, with this one. Should it fail to work well, we offer a complete money-back guarantee.

And, as to the Red Buttons…Don’t you TOUCH them Red Buttons!

With our best wishes, which we wish were better, but wishes being what they are, these are the ones we currently have and are offering to you,

And the thanks of our entire nation.

Ruppert,
The Incompetent
Prince of …
Dang! Forgot what I’m Prince of again…

And now, the results fo the Cherry Cup XIV Consolation Match between Spruitland and the founder of the DonCherry Cup Tournament, Kalaallit Nunaat:

Kalaallit Nunaat 3 - Spruitland 0

Final game - tomorrow

Message from RBACFA to national hockey output unit, Angry Rabbiland

Dear Rabbis,

Well, thank goodness and most glad tidings to you for the happy news that Angry Mad Rabbis not planning to invade RBA after all. CFA has given orders for two divisions of troops to stand down (there twelve apes in a division, right?). Not really sure where Angry Rabbiland is in relation to RBA-- it miracle that Skate-Footers got there at all-- so we weren't sure which border to put troops on. Thought best course of action was to send them out to middle of veldt and watch skies for airborne hassidim. Only one ape saw anything that looked remotely Jewish, and she couldn't figure out how to operate banana, so she didn't even shoot at it-- which probably good thing, considering it probably wasn't invading rabbi but more likely regular RBA-residing bird. Two apes fell over while craning necks back and one sprained toe while running in fear of charging rabbi that turned out to be harmless gazelle. So all in all, non-invasion resulted in three casualties, none serious.

Also we wish to thank you most humbly for kind gift of crazy talking box. Although esteemed Ms. Spritle, Professor of Airborne Transmissions and Viruses at Bipedaleen University, explained that picture-boxes not work well here because they need to eat "signal," which RBA apparently lacks, still, we put box in room facing Oglethorpian box, and they seem happy enough talking to each other. We a little worried that bees living in boxes might get out and attack us, but we cross that bridge when we come to it. In meantime, one battalion of CFA soldiers stationed outside room to protect country from bees (there two soldiers in a battalion, right?).

In short, thank you, and good night.

Mushhead Township Takes the Purple Toadstool/till...
Mushheads to be crosschecked win or lose!

In reports out today it has been suggested that the two MushHead Township fans are actually waiting to go to the movies and are at the wrong venue.

It has also been reported that they have been touching the red Button and using spies to make it look like other nations nationals.

Final score 4-3 to Township.

FINALS: Don Cherry Cup XIV
The Mushroom Kingship 2 - The Gulf States 0


Cherry Cup XIV
Champions - The Mushroom Kingship
Second Place - The Gulf States
Third Place - Kalaallit Nunaat
Fourth Place - Spruitland

OOC: VAR, thank you very much for hosting.

Yes and may i say W00T! Harlesburg picks another Wiener!
The people dont starve!

So if noone TGs The Township will they ever know?

Thanks VAR

*sigh*

So close, yet so far. What good is 2nd place when after 14 cups we still can't first? But still, this is one helluva showing for us. Our best yet.

Congrats to Mushroom Kingdom. Best of 3? I mean, we're already 1-1.

The Squornshelan Ice Hockey Association is interested in the purchase in some of the drugs that the Score Generator Machines were on during this Cherry Cup. Money is not an issue.

The Squornshelan Ice Hockey Association is interested in the purchase in some of the drugs that the Score Generator Machines were on during this Cherry Cup. Money is not an issue.Is there a Starbucks in your neighborhood? ;)

Is there a Starbucks in your neighborhood? ;)

This is quite possibly, the most unnessecary quetion in the world. ;)

Druida fan #1 is sitting in his hotel room, waiting for his flight home tomorrow. His former colleague, Druida fan #2, has left for the joyous world of following whoever he likes. Right now, it's The Mushroom Kingship. Druida fan #1 turns on his TV.

TV announcer: "...and finally, The Mushroom Kingship beat The Gulf States in the final of the Cherry Cup tonight by two goals to nil. Goals from..."

Druida fan #1 turns the TV off again. "Just think," he thought to himself, "Trevor will be out celebrating in his mushroom costume now, the happiest man amongst the andgry rabbits."

He slumped onto his sofa-bed, only to be interrupted by the sound of a ringing noise. It was the phone in his room. Curiously, he picked it up.

"There's a visitor for you in reception."

"But I... don't know anyone..."

"They're definately for you."

"Oh. Well... er... send them up."

"OK."

And so he waited. And waited. And waited. And waited a bit more. And waited. And *knock knock*

"You in there, Trevor?"

"Trevor?"

"So are you going to let me in?"

"Depends."

"Depends? On what?"

"Depends if you're staying."

"Well, I've been thinking, and... well, I remember when we were proud to follow our team. I want to go back to those days."

"Really?"

"Would I be standing outside your room dressed as a mushroom if I didn't mean it?"

"So do you know how the game went?"

"No idea."

"Aww!" The door swung open. "C'mere!"

And they hugged. Kind of. If it's possible to hug a man in a mushroom suit.

And so it was that Druida had both of their fans back. Cherry Cup XV, here we come!

And they hugged. Kind of. If it's possible to hug a man in a mushroom suit.

It is.

http://www.suprmchaos.com/aminita-man_121502.jpg

When is CC XV?

When is CC XV?Kalaallit Nunaat posted this several pages ago. It's the sign-ups for CC XV.
Kalaallit Nunaat']also the queen commands you to sign up for cc15 at http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=432430