NationStates Jolt Archive

LePage Anti-Aircraft Gun and Other News

03-04-2005, 19:41
"Good morning, loyal fellow subjects: I'm Max Fersen and this is the morning news from the Imperial News Service."
(fanfare from 'Pictures at an Exhibition'; shows the smiling fair haired craggy faced senior anchor)
"Today the Ministry of War announced that the completion of the latest in military projects: the LePage Anti Aircraft gun, which is capable of dealing with entire formations of planes."
(scene shows MOPP suited crews loading up a huge eight barreled self propelled artillery piece with what appear to be large tubes. An officer, a short distance away and smiling, says, "The substance we use which is then converted by the heat generated in the machine is potentially toxic to children and should not be eaten. This is a precaution. We are very happy with the test results.")
"In other news, Her Majesty expressed condolences towards the Kingdom of the Resurgent Dream following a tragic explosion in that nation's largest harbour.
(scene shows wreckage and smoke boiling, a shakey handheld camera in what might be a small plane)
"And the trial of Count Mirbach is to commence following the re-opening of the Volksraad after Spring Break. The former Chancellor has been accused of high treason and conspiracy to commit murder, and the procedure of the trial has therefore been of great interest."
(scene shows a calm looking Mirbach being led into the Lavenrunzian Ministry of Justice)
"More news following this message from our sponsor."
04-04-2005, 03:58
"Have you heard about the nw anti-aircraft gun they've got over in Bologna?"
"It's the Lepage glue gun, it glues an entire formation of planes together in midair."

-Catch 22
04-04-2005, 04:09
OOC: glad someone gets my references
The Resi Corporation
04-04-2005, 04:09
"They could always use explosive artillary shells, couldn't they?"
"They'd be rigged to a detonator that explodes when it reaches a set proximity of a given heat signature after it is fired, and it wouldn't have that lovely toxic side effect."
"Ah, but that's too simple of a design. You need to make something needlessly mysterious and complicated."
"Right, right."

Conversation between Secretary Angellica Kradii and CEO Johnathan Tetragammaton, respectivly.