ESUS Plans to Destroy Sol System
Sie Satinia
18-02-2005, 01:05
This morning, the ESUS Alliance, or Extra Special Undergraduate Students, declared that it would destroy the Sol system, in responce to the new elf infestation. The ESUS Spokesman, 'Injury Prime' had the following to say:
"We can no longer abide by as these Xeno scum infest the birthland of the Human race, we shall purge them once and for all, by destroying Sol!"
As this message streams out to the nations of the Universe, several hundred thousand UB34 W@/\/K $H1P$ of death are on course for earth. Many Sie Satinian commanders are praying to Satan for assistance in battle, and shall begin to pull massive penis shaped ships from Satins Massive Arse. These shall be the forerunner of destroying any elfin defences there may be positioned around Sol.
Fluffy moved about his doghouse impatiently when a voice came over the intercom. “Sir, Admiral Gerber would like to talk to you”
Admiral Gerber was Ta Pea’s supreme commander of Ta Peas human forces. He was an accomplished tactician, and had proved himself in many battles. All this despite his very young age, his image appeared on a screen nearby.
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“What can I do for you Admiral” asked Fluffy casually
“There’s a situation that has been developing” explained the young Admiral “I’m sending you the last transmission with the details. What are your orders?”
walking over to the screen fluffy sniffed the scents that were now disperse, a message hidden within. “Very well prepare the fleet to begin joint operations. If the humans are being expelled then the Sol system is of no use to us”
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President Gray sat down at his desk pondering the recent events. It seemed that the situation was very gim for remaining humans in the Sol system. Sie Satinia would be difficult to deal with as they had already acted. His mind raced as he wondered what he could do about it. Being from Mars himself, he cared about his home planet and wanted to do all in his power to protect it. He reached for his intercom panel and paged his aide.
"Mrs. Clyde, could you send in Mr. Ronald and Mr. Kanardy please?"
"Of course Mr. President." the young aide replied."
After five minutes the Secretary of State and Secretary of Defense walked into the president's office and sat down in the guest chairs. They seemed confused as to what they could do at this time.
"Gentlemen," The president began. "I beleive we have a situation. Sie Satinia has initiated the attack and eradication of the Sol System."
"We can't do anything about it." Mr. Kanardy replied. "Our space fleet is near non-existant. There is no way we could stand up against Sie Satinia."
"Our first intent is not defense, but negotiation." the president assured. "Mr. Ronald I need you to send Sie Satinia a proposal for this situation. I'm sure we can come to terms somehow."