NationStates Jolt Archive

Your Attention. This thread has been a parody. The 'Trimative of Yutt' is created sole-ly from parody nations based on the recent ESUS log of various misconceptions held about the 'real' Triumvirate. Again, this has not been a genuine action of the Triumvirate of Yut, and exists soley for comedic purpouses.

Today, the Trimative of Yutt announced that is patience with the uncouth species called humans has finally run out. In an announcement by the First Among Elves Council, it was decreed that humans are no longer to be permitted within the domains of the Trimative, IE, Sol, and are to leave within twenty four hours.

The planet known as Earth in the maggot tongue of the humans is to be the first to be purified of this menace. "Woods once grew there," said Nathicaniel nos Finwë, "and it is our intention to ensure that future generations can enjoy a biospherically pure Earth."

When asked how this purity would be accomplished, Treznon nos Ingwë said only "in fire."

Treznon sat in his throneroom being waited on hand and foot by his dozens of human slaves. He wiped his boots on his human-skin rug as he stood. "Well, the announcement has been made. It's for the best but I shall hate to part with all of you slaves."

With a wave of the Emperor's hand, dozens of Elven guards descended on the humans, gunning them down mercilessly. Treznon just laughed as he activated his communication screen. "Nathicaniel, my love, we're finally going to have Sol to ourselves, its natural masters, despite our origin in the depths of space."

"Yes," she said, sitting in a large throne, toying with a dagger as a human maid fussed over her hair, "It is at last done. And for the love of our deep space home, will you stop messing up you stupid bluntears!"

Nathicaniel wiped the blood of her incompetent coiffure off the knife, a moment later and smiled, "Humans can't really be relied upon for any task can they? Poor eyesight don't you know... Best to just put them out of our misery."

Treznon nodded the once. "Perhaps we should enslave a race superior to humans, such as gorrillas or chimpanzees. In any event, I was hoping you'd come over later. I was going to have roasted human with a fine wine of fermented human blood...and lembas bread."

Carridia announces that it is our intention to rid galaxy of such inferior beings such as you. Howewer, we will not receive those humans of yours, because they will not probably meet our genetic and physical requirements have they have not gone through the same pattern of hundreds of years of evolution that has made us superior to the inferior Sol humans.

OOC:Are you FT or what?

"Oh excellent!" Nathicaniel replied happily, foot long ears perking up, "Roast human. My favourite meal.

"Oh, someone on the other line...

"My dear... Carridians, I have seen a good many inanimate objects superior to humans. It is nothing to be proud of, simply a fact of life."

OOC: We're godmodders, that's what we are.

Treznon shrugged and hit another button on his consol. "Send all twelve grav fleets to destroy the insolent Carridians." Shrugging, her turned back to his beloved Nathi. "Well, inform the Carridians that as they are human they are not allowed in Sol anymore under the new law. Have them wait just outside the borders of Sol and we'll go destroy them there. So are you coming over?"

Beside his golden throne which lay upon a pedestal of human skulls and their childrens bones, Scolopendril relaxed his luke warm pool as several concubines took turns to massage his tall slender ears which assured him his superiority over the mundane humans.

Around him in his royal chamber, white marble pillars rose up rise decorated with various tapestries illustrating the glories of elves and the triumpth of the Trimative of Yutt over the pesky human element within the solar system. Of course, they hadn't gotten around to that but there was still time and Scolopendril was confident that the humans posed little threat to his powerful and dextrous space fleet. Elves always make for the best pilots... he thought to himself on a whim.

Politely, an indentured human servant walked up to the edge of his pool and coughed for attention, keeping his tone subservient at all times and not raising his voice any more then required, he knew what would happen to him if he did not as Scolopendril was merciful in permitting his continued existance as a reminder of the human races place.

"Overlord Scolopendril, sir, Elf Lady Nathicaniel and Treznon have requested your appearance in the FAE chambers on Tittan? How would you like us to respond?"

Scolopendril looked at the buff young servant, the young man had been carefully pampered and scented so not to offend the Overlord with his smell, while the loin cloth served to cover what little dignity the man had left the rest of him was bare as a further reminder of his inferiourity.

"Inform them that I shall arrive in my own time, preferably later this evening once I've had a chance to prepare myself. I wouldn't like to arrive in this state I assure you."

And with that the servant left the chamber quietly to rely the message.

"Oh, yes."

She turned back to the other screen.

"Yes. You're close enough to human to qualify for elimination. Please wait outside the Solar System for us to destroy you insolent curs."

Then, with a brief thought, she dissapeared, and re-appeared behind Treznon a moment later.

Treznon shrugged and hit another button on his consol. "Send all twelve grav fleets to destroy the insolent Carridians." Shrugging, her turned back to his beloved Nathi. "Well, inform the Carridians that as they are human they are not allowed in Sol anymore under the new law. Have them wait just outside the borders of Sol and we'll go destroy them there. So are you coming over?"

OOC:Unless the twelwe fleets are composed of fighters, i'm gonna launch my ignore command carrier at you (if u know what i mean) because there's no chance you could have so many ships. And if you'd have read "Commonwealth of Carridia" thread, you'd notice that Carridians are humans but they differ enough from Sol humans that they consider themselves superior to humans on Sol and wouldn't bother going there. Second, Carridia is quite long travel from Sol.

EDIT: OOC: And yes, this is indeed Future-tech.

Treznon took Nathicaniel in her arms and kissed her passionately. "Oh, my love! Scolopendril said he was going to be late. Arrogant and irresponsible. Sometimes I think Sindar are only a thousand times as good as humans instead of ten thousand times as good like Vanyar." He paused. "...and Noldor." he added hastily to avoid a smack from his fiance.

The Lich-Queen Nathi grinned. She didn't really have much choice in the matter. Her dreadful under-caverns reverberated with the wails of those under her control or soon to be, one of the many she Was bowing before her black-robed, skeletal and sexah form.

'The one called Fris continues to resist your control, Queen...Do you want me to get the duct tape out?'

'Oh, for fuck's sake...'

'Sorry.'

Just the, her bat-skull-telephone bleeped. She paused, then lurked over to answer it. 'Hrm...Do the undead count as human?'

Telegram to the Trimative of Yutt

Rar.

~The Dead Lady

"Well, yes. That's their fault for not going to Valinor after all..." said Nathicaniel, "And I hear those insolent humans are doubting that we have twelve fleets... I mean honestly, it's not as if that's more than four per state, and you really didn't specify the size of the fleets either...

"But what more can we expect from humans?"

OOC:Unless the twelwe fleets are composed of fighters, i'm gonna launch my ignore command carrier at you (if u know what i mean) because there's no chance you could have so many ships.
OOC: We're godmodders, that's what we are.

OOC: None too observant are you? Ok, here is clue for you: Nationstates is free form role-play, you are free to ignore what you like but if you don't like it then I would suggest not posting here.

Treznon grinned as the Dead Lady rung. "No, not at all. In fact, would you like to help us in expelling the humans?"

Over his shoulder, Nathicaniel grinned inanely, "I imagine you can make productive use of the humans... Hard to imagine, but still..."

"Humans have no place in Sol. If Eru had wanted humans in Sol, they would have evolved on Earth." He waved a hand dismissively before looking back to the Dead Lady. "Happy dining, Imperatrice."

Nathicaniel began to ravenously attack a large platter of roast human and salad, "But they do make delicious eating, that much can be said for them... They're probably meant to be game animals..."

The Lich-Queen paused, 'I desire only hearts and minds, and preferrably their owners, though that's less important. Oh, and bones.' she glanced across her throne room, 'Skeletons are noisy sods, but at least your don't have to put up with all that nastiness in the carpets like with zombies.'

She paused.

'Not that I have carpets.' she took a sip of a cocktail that made brake fluid look like shandy, 'What terms do you propose for this venture, and what assurances do I have that you'll deliver on them?'

For the rest of the afternoon, Scolopendril spent his time allowing his harem the opportunity to clean his body for the meeting later this evening, his hair alone took several hours to properly treat and prepare before finally being styled and scented, he wanted to look his best for his dear allies whom would be expecting much of him. Of course, he had to keep his bold apperance in order to keep up the sense of power and boding when he entered the room; as such his entourage were specifically chosen for their small statures in order to make him seem that much taller. The only exception was Faldor, possibly one of the bulkiest elves that had ever lived, and he enjoyed to wear spiked fullplate for such occasions. Faldor was like a son to him.

Finally the time came when Scolopendril and his group were finally prepared to arrive at the FAE chambers, they were to fly by Battlecruiser, escorted by some of the finest ships in his fleet. Soon the Trimative of Yutt would meet once more to plot the possibilities and plan their eventual domination over all humanity.

"We would suggest farming the Homo Edulis (Edible Human) to ensure the continued diversity of Elvish cuisine..."

~ Chefiel

Treznon grinned at the Dead Lady. "Well, the terms would be that you help us kill these humans and then you get the remains. The guarantee would be that you would be at the battle, at the source of the remains."

Looking aside, he noticed a message from Chefiel and responded quickly. "Humans are too inferior even for food. We prefer animals superior to humans like pigs and ducks and lembas bread."

The Lich-Queen stroked her chin with a bony finger, 'You would give to me all the remains of the battle, yes? If so, I can start forming an army of evil as soon as the kettle's done boiling.'

There was a low, evil moan of approval from the legions behind her in the caves, 'Nnnnoooo dooooommmmm without cooooofffeeee.'

Treznon grinned. "Why not? After all, there will be many more human remains that I can keep for myself as we expel them from Sol."

Nathicaniel looked at her fiance, and laughed, "Well. We can't all have a taste for human meat dear..." she said, crunching her way through some lettuce.

"No, we can't." He grinned. "By the way, did you see my new Silmarils yet? They just came off the line in the new plant I had built."

Nathicaniel took a pendant holding a handsize 'gem' of dull translucent red plastic off, and banged it against the side of her plate, "Good... I think the batteries in this one are almost gone... Ah crap. I've killed the bulb..."

The gravfleets progressed toward their target, thousands upon thousands of ships, armed with missiles! Unfortunately, these ships (http://www.necrontyr.plus.com/images/trimativeships.jpg) happened to be, quite frankly, pathetic. Small pods, essentially a box with sails and some missile tubes (each carrying only one missile) and humans trapped inside, made up the bulk of the fleets.

There wasn't even a reason for the pods to have humans in them. They were remotely controlled from a drone-command ship for each fleet, but they managed to cram in six of the humans per Gnat anyway...

It was a way of dealing with humans, and that was what mattered.

OOC: None too observant are you? Ok, here is clue for you: Nationstates is free form role-play, you are free to ignore what you like but if you don't like it then I would suggest not posting here.

OOC:Then i'll go and find something to RP that does not involve elves and godmodders :D

Meklar, Lord of Light sat down next to the round table on the bridge of his mighty fortress “Power Love”. Gathered were his advisors of the Cultural Diversity Council: an Asian guy and a black woman had already sat down but one of the seat was still empty.

A typical anglosaxon male ran in late, wearing a smile. “I’m sorry, friends!” he exclaimed. “They needed me to distribute soup at the community centre.”

“Its all right Cody!” the Asian guy said warmly. “Feeding the poor is important. And even if we have no poor, people still go hungry. Taking your social responsibility is fun!”

They all nodded in agreement, and Meklar, Lord of Light smiled with confidence in his team.

“We have business”, he said strongly – while avoiding to be overly authorative – “The Trimative of Yutt has expelled all humans from the sol system. Its is a blatant act of speciesism and they have not listened to kind requests not to do it. They did not even check with the United Nations if it was okay!”

They all gasped in horror. “Damn them”, Cody cursed.

“Swearing is bad!” the Asian woman rebuked. “Rough language can hurt peoples feelings. We must not hate our enemies, or we will become just like them!”

“Oh, right. I’m sorry Jen”, Cody said blushing. They all smiled and forgave him.

“But we must do something!” Cody said.

“Yes.”, Meklar said. “We will morph into power ninjas and stop this evil plan. Everyone with me?”

“YEAH!” they said all at once. “Go team!”

MEKLAR ATTACKS ONLY FOR GOOD!!!! (http://www.yuri.sakura.ne.jp/~m-0563/gangu/bmp/megaranger.jpg)

Meanwhile, another Yutt Fleet approached Melkar's fortress.

Aboard it's command ship, a similarly ugly and graceless box, not that the occupants would ever acknowledge that, an elvish captain, dressed like a pirate, with over one hundred gold earrings and an eyepatch ordered the attack to begin.

"And... See if you can establish communications with them!"

"OH NO! A TRAP!" everyone shouted at the same time as they saw that their own fortress was under attack. They were going to attack to save the humans... but now they were themselves under attack!

"No fair!" Cody said pouting.

Everyone agreed that it was not fair.

“But what now?!!!!!!!” Asian Jen said in confusion. “We must help the fortress or things will go broke!”

“Innocent people may be hurt!” the black woman agreed.

Meklar looked serious, and shouted. “You go help the humans! I will handle them. GRRR. I will show them that their violence is bad!”

The Lord of Light then pressed a button and the powerninja morphed into a really fast snake of fastness that went back to the pirate while the team went to attack the evilers.

The Gnats closed with the Fortress, and opened fire with all their missiles. Thousands of Gnats became tens of thousands of sharp pointy missiles containing nasty explosives...

"And... See if you can establish communications with them!"
Meklar saw the evil message…. It might not be too late to make friends yet!

He opened the communications channel which looked a lot like a television.

The fiend now saw the fluffy Pink Meklar in all his shiny, with his white spikey Armour of Great Justice and the sword of Anime Shogun Referencing on his back. The spikes on the Armour of Great Justice were bendy and the armour itself is sort of fuzzy – but it had been given to him by his father when he died killed by the evilers while doing something incredibly good.

Somehow, he was reminded of this when he opened the comm. channel of the really fast snake of fastness ….

Seeing the shiny armour, the communications officer began to lick the screen, and, rolling his eyes, the captain kicked the other elf over onto his back. "Ah! Melkar!" he said, "I want you to hear something..."

And with that, he basted a massively loud tirade of dreadful and abominable gangsta rap through the speakers, its lyrics one long stream of obscenity. Meanwhile, the visual specturm was occluded by a poor quality 'Adult' film, involving particularly unpleasant looking humans having diabolical things done to them.

AAAAGH. Meklar was hurt inside. All the nasty racist and un-nice things the song said made him sad, and the treatment of women like objects that the singers did almost made him cry. He thought about his team and about friendship.

"Your hipness does not hide your coarseness!", Meklar shouted defiantly.

Then he saw the Adult film. He could do nothing but stare at it indignantly, his eyes focussed on the scenes played before him. Never had he seen such things before… the really fast snake of fastness drifted into the enemy trap.

OOC: Pornography is bad.
:( :sniper:

The 'Pirate' Captain laughed as the trick worked, "Board that ship, and capture the villain! Prepare to retreat! Take him to Tittan!"

From the command ship, a large boarding vessel darted forth to board the really fast snake of fastness...

Meklar was still staring entranced at the screen, and was taken away by the evil men.

MEANWHILE.......

FRIENDS ATTACK THE YOTTISH WARBAND TO SAVE THE HUMANS! A PIC!!! (http://www.yuri.sakura.ne.jp/~m-0563/gangu/bmp/megaranger.jpg)

One of the pointy eared marines put a heavy rifle to Melkar's head, "For crimes against the SUPERIOR elvish race, you are hereby sentanced to death on the orders of Lady Nathicaniel..."

After hearing about all of these events, the non-existant government of Crystal Palais issued the following statement:

"rofl!!!111onehundredeleven"

That is all.

It was then that Meklar woke up with a realy pissed look on his face, he then snapped the necks of the closest two gaurds, drew his Desert Eagles, and killed the other gaurds, using their bodies as sheilds, he blew out each of there rotten brains. It was all over in less then a second, the troopers were dead, and he was alive. "Sorry SGT, your promotion has been canceled." Still annoyed that these dogs didn't know better, he drew his knives and cut the throat of every last one of those filthy pigs. Meklar then ran off after hiding the bodies in a concealed location where no one would find them for at least a month.

"Lifesigns aboard the assault shuttle have terminated," said a sensor officer with a comically large set of headphones.

"Order all drones to attack the shuttle!" replied the pirate captain.

OOC: *Queues up Flash Gordon by Queen*

Ahh, yes. That should set the mood perfectly.

A lodge in the shadow of Taniquetil, on Tittan

Renatien nos Sauckol was of the Territoriel elves, short (for an elf) and rangily muscular, with bronzed ears covered in golden fuzz and green eyes that positively glowed when the light from the Moon-Tree filled them. The light of the Moon-Tree, or her arrogance and contempt for humans, an arrogance that always lurked, mocking, ready to lead her people into orgies of genocide upon the weak, human mud-people.

Right now, it was a little of both, and a little of lust awakened by the projections of a surgically-gleaming mithril suit of armor that had just passed preliminary tests. That and tapping into the sensor dust spying on her two husbands in another room, engaged in strenous erotic activities. Silly exhibitionist bois, letting me get away with this. I'll punish you later..

It was an impossibly expensive piece of equipment, but equally impossibly potent, and the Territoriel had tens of thousands of years of investments to fall back on. With a tinkling laugh baring sharp-edged white teeth, she authorized the expenditure and fell into dreams off massacre, recalling the sense of her teeth biting into a feral human's heart as the beast watched... that and the scents relayed by the dust.

The march continues... the march toward total domination of all space and time

Overhead, gleaming mithrilshapes danced.

'nuff saud.

'Lan Stee'

"Lifesigns aboard the assault shuttle have terminated," said a sensor officer with a comically large set of headphones.

"Order all drones to attack the shuttle!" replied the pirate captain.
But the really fast snake of fastness was, well, fast. It quickly space-crawled to the pirate ship to do its deadly special attack… the Jaw of Biting… which spat deadly space-poison…..

The command ship exploded. (http://www.necrontyr.plus.com/images/boom.jpg) Failsafe enacted, the drones all immediately either exploded, if they had missiles left, or rammed the nearest large objetct at full power.

Emperor Smorg read the incredibly late missive from Elf Lady Nathicaniel. "0h n03z! It si t3h GR0DL0AD! H00manz bant fr0m S0l?"

A horde of voices pipe up as one in chorus. " 0h N03ZZ0RZ!"

"0h h0 h0 h0!" The Emperor kicks his stumpy legs that are suspended off the ground while he sits, massaging his giant gut as his single eye closes in laughter. "S3nd 3lf Lady message. G3t m3 Sp0rk 3arz fr0m Star Dr3k C0nv3nchun." The ears are handed to him, set up like a pair of mufflers with a plastic band meant to be fitted over the head.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------

3lf Lady Nath1can13l

W3 R glad y0u tell h00manz G0 WAY!!!!!111

:eek:

OOC: This is well... quite odd...

We would like everyone to know that the Federated Segments of Scolopendra and the Triumvirate of Yut have absolutely nothing to do with this. In addition, we politely decline the recommendation that we move from Sol. If this creates any inconvenience, please contact the nearest International Relations Section diplomatic mission and we will gladly enter a discourse concerning this situation.

http://www.weirdozone.0catch.com/projects/nationstates/scolopendra/nadjiba_abd-al-haqq.gifAdvisor Nadjiba Abd-al-Haqq
International Relations Section
Federated Segments of Scolopendra

We thank Trumvirate of Yut for giving notice of the diffrence. We had found the various annoucements somewhat confusing and wondered if a group of Yut elementry schoolers had somehow taken over your communications system.

We will ignore any futher babble from the "Trimative of Yutt"

OOC: Really this is a bad parody...The only thing you got right were the slightly off names Scolopendril

OOC: That, Alcona, was a very amusing comment. You seem to have grasped both the correct and incorrect ends of the stick simultaneously. Further, this isn't a parody of Yut itself {such a parody would have more angles to it than this one does}, it is a parody of the views of Yut expressed in the recent transcripts of the ESUS forae. The 'Trimative of Yutt' for example, is from their typo. As is the entire alliance being made up of, and I quote, 'Evil Imperialist Space Elves' that, to paraphrase 'claim dominion over the entire Solar System.' Reading this thread will help (http://forums.jolt.co.uk/showthread.php?t=398221) .

And, co-incidentally, these nations aren't all made by the same player...

OOC Parody Score:

Concept: 10
Execution: 3

I think that says everything,

edit: I will go check out this ESUS thread.

OOC Parody Score:

Concept: 10
Execution: 3

I think that says everything.

OOC: It's given everyone involved a good chuckle. If you don't find it funny, well, to be nice and pretentious, de gustibus non disputandum est.

"Sir, we've got something odd on scopes..." The Analyst threw a worried glance back to Sub-Director Allens, who merely stroked his manly five-o-clock shadow and squinted his cool eyes.

"Well, what is it?" He asked, his voice rough and deep. "Do I sound manly-cool enough?"

"Of course, sir, a paragon of masculine splendor, in a completely non-homoerotic manner, sir!" the Analyst declared. "Oh, and we've got an irony inversion flux."

"A what? Don't use big word. I like short words. I like short sentences. I like single sounds! I like beating people with a stick." Allens reached over and smacked an aide bringing coffee.

"GWAH!" there was a scream and the sound of a coffee cup falling down a long staircase, followed by a crash that sounded almost like a person falling into an open capacitor.

The Analyst winced and stepped back, "Sir, something's causing a fractal plane to intersect, generating parallels of numerous factions in this reality. We're getting dopplegangers declaring that all humans most leave Sol."

Allens simply stared blankly. "Fra-fra-inter- para- what?"

The analyst pulled out sock puppets and began to demonstrate:

"Oh, look, I'm a normal leader! I like people, and I live on Earth. I'm human!"

He hauled out another puppet, with pointy ears taped on.

"Hello there, I'm an elf! I'm a duplicate- double of Mr. Red, but I don't like humans.

Allens grunted. "Elves don't like people? Kill teh elves!" he grabbed his machinegun, ready to march into glorious, manly battle.

"No! No! No!" The analyst grabbed the puppets again.

"I'm not a normal elf! I'm an elf double of a human, and I'm really ironic! I don't like humans because my double is human. I'm inverted!

"The elf confused me. He said "inverted". Isn't that a scateboarding move? I hate scateboarders. Stupid emo girly men."

The analyst sighed again. "Never mind, the wave is passing. We should be returning to normal in three, two, one-"

At once, Allens sat straight up, cleanly shaved. "The hell is going on here, Analyst? Why do I have a machinegun? What is he doing in that power converter? And why in God's name are you wearing sock puppets?"

"...I don't know... it has to be the fractal wave we just passed through..."

"Goddamn shifting reality." Allens leaned back. "And why do I reek of cheap cologne?"

Our official communications are quite secure from our elementary schools, although we can see where any possible confusion may have arisen.

Additionally, we are willing to assist as needed to prevent... unfortunate incidents resulting from attempts by the "Trimative" to enforce its ban. Given the surprising and none-too-complimentary marginal similarities between the "Trimative" and the Triumvirate, we do not wish to be confused with what appears to be a group that certainly conflicts with our own ideals and interests.

http://www.weirdozone.0catch.com/projects/nationstates/scolopendra/nadjiba_abd-al-haqq.gifAdvisor Nadjiba Abd-al-Haqq
International Relations Section
Federated Segments of Scolopendra

OOC: It's given everyone involved a good chuckle. If you don't find it funny, well, to be nice and pretentious, de gustibus non disputandum est.

OOC: Ah, the fate of all critics...
Actually now I do get the parody far better but you have to have read the ESUS thread to get this one... :headbang:
Oh well, have fun...

Our official communications are quite secure from our elementary schools, although we can see where any possible confusion may have arisen.

Additionally, we are willing to assist as needed to prevent... unfortunate incidents resulting from attempts by the "Trimative" to enforce its ban. Given the surprising and none-too-complimentary marginal similarities between the "Trimative" and the Triumvirate, we do not wish to be confused with what appears to be a group that certainly conflicts with our own ideals and interests.

http://www.weirdozone.0catch.com/projects/nationstates/scolopendra/nadjiba_abd-al-haqq.gifAdvisor Nadjiba Abd-al-Haqq
International Relations Section
Federated Segments of Scolopendra

We are most bemused by the declaration of the Federated Segments of Scolopendra on this matter. It has long been known to the intelligence agencies of many nations that the Trimative controls the Sol System, while this so called Triumvirate is a relative unknown in international affairs.

- Cesarion Calaquendi, Chancellor of the Dominion.

ooc: You people need something better to do than 'RP's based off the fact that not everyone is such good spellers as you.

ooc: You people need something better to do than 'RP's based off the fact that not everyone is such good spellers as you.

OOC: it's also based of innumerate other factual errors in that log. Such as every nation in Yut being elvish, Zero-One being Pacifists, or the Triumvirate claiming dominion over Sol.

OOC: it's also based of innumerate other factual errors in that log. Such as every nation in Yut being elvish, Zero-One being Pacifists, or the Triumvirate claiming dominion over Sol.

ooc - well, you still need something better to do...

ooc - well, you still need something better to do...You're reading a forum dedicated to fantasy nation-building and complaining because someone is amusing themselves with a snarky bit of parody?

You could always not read it.

ooc: Ah, what the hell. No, I haven't had anything to do with this thread, nor any of the parody nation names relating to myself or others ... but damned if I'm going to deny folks their bit of fun. It's harmless after all, so no complaints.

Have fun with it. :)

ooc: Ah, what the hell. No, I haven't had anything to do with this thread, nor any of the parody nation names relating to myself or others ... but damned if I'm going to deny folks their bit of fun. It's harmless after all, so no complaints.

Have fun with it. :)

OOC: Ladies and gents, I present, a good sport.

ooc: now why am I saying ooc? It's obviously ooc.....anyways, why must you all ruin this wonderful bit of parody with your ooc comments and complaints about accuracies and none such?

I don't need to remind you that many ESUS members had nothing to do with that thread but anyways, Good Laugh.

"Damn. This new spoof is pretty good," S-47 commented, noting somewhere in the back of his consciousness that he was supposed to be keeping tabs on the other screen. Unbeknownst to him, several small countries exploded into warfare over absolutely nothing, and the Commonality was robbed of a chance to look big and strong and powerful.

Damn.

ooc - well, you still need something better to do...
OOC: Come now, humor is very valuable. Writing it is an excellent use of one's time.

Good work, I say. <Tag> for continued reading.

The very human Commodore Dave Willis slumped into his command chair and looked around the bridge of his.. command - the Naming Committiee was still in closed session - the matt grey form of it's hull, visible beyond the windows, looking suspicously like a 'Modern Tech' Doujin-class superdreadnaught.

"Where the hell is that elf from Logistics?" he asked after a minute longer.

"He took the day off, sir; put in for 'emergency' species-reassignment after hearing some elvish alliance declared war on hunamity." It was the head of the personel department.

The Commodore swore, only to be interupted.

"Don't worry; I sent word to the Company. They'll have someone clear the ammunition expenditure for this afternoon's live-fire exercise befor we have to scrub the op."

Willis' expression lightened, accepting a mug of hot chocolate from his personal stewardess, "Good job. Say, what is that elf-boy gonna come out of the Tank as, anyway?"

"Busty nympho foxgirl," the wolfish Department Head grinned, and his superrior gaged upon the hot drink, somehow managing to avoid soiling his uniform.

"I had no idea he was into that kind of stuff," he replyed after a minute with a skeptical tone, "Always seemed to haughty to play the slut."

The lupine personel manager gave a satisfied smirk, "He may not be into that kind of stuff, but I am, and the bastard needed to be cut down a little. Besides, the Doc owes me a favor."

The Commodore's reply, however, was forestalled by a call from the room's communications blister.

"Sir, word just in from on high; 6 Iowa-Class Battleships have been released for live-fire exercise this afternoon."

"Acknowledge, then give word to start chambering the battleships," Willis replied.

'That's it,' he concluded inwardly, while watching seagoing battleship's being loaded into his thusfar-nameless command's underbelly 'revolver-like magazine, 'As soon as my contract's up, I'm going back to the militia; working for Uniphase Armouries Interversal is just too damn fucked up for me.'

And here was me thinking it was the Triumverate of Yut who were actually respectable.. Still.. meh. Fun all the same I spose..

And here was me thinking it was the Triumverate of Yut who were actually respectable.. Still.. meh. Fun all the same I spose..
This isn't us--we have nothing to do with it. I don't, at least.

And here was me thinking it was the Triumverate of Yut who were actually respectable.. Still.. meh. Fun all the same I spose..

I fail to see how the actions of others who are not in the Triumvirate equates to us not being respectable. So some folks decided to work up a parody based of a thread by a disgruntled ESUS member. People, parodies happen now and then. I didn't see people up in arms over the Wombat News posts that did this sort of thing all the time. Frankly, not our fault - and more than a little outside our jurisdiction, given free-form rp and such.

Yes, perhaps worth a chuckle initially, but I think it's dragged on more than long enough, all the same. Obviously some players have taken offense, and when that happens, it stops being fun. The initial post that spawned this all was not our doing, and came as much of a surprise to us as anyone. It was also, in my opinion perhaps not done in the best of taste, though I believe once done, required some answering. Actions taken in anger tend to be those folks later regret.

Best of luck to ESUS in reordering their alliance, working out whatever problems have resulted from all of this, and in ironing out any potential problems with reputation that some seem concerned about. I hope that any interactions between our groups in the future will prove to be more amicable, and as free from any predjudice, misinformation and bad feelings as is possible.

OO'C': Indeed. This thread has run its course in my opinion, and this nation shan't be posting again, at least, not unless something happens to refresh the joke. You can all consider 'Elf Lady Nathicaniel' conquered for terminal stupidity. ;)

I hope that any interactions between our groups in the future will prove to be more amicable, and as free from any predjudice, misinformation and bad feelings as is possible.

Well if you Actually RP'ed with us... *hint*

Well if you Actually RP'ed with us... *hint*

Well, if you actually gave me a reason to ... *hint*

Actually, I -have- rp'ed with some players from ESUS before, perhaps in some cases under different guises than you see here. Perhaps way, way back in the lost sands of time under this one. In any case, takes two, baby. It's hardly appropriate to paint us with the brush of supposed 'arrogance' or 'elitism' when you yourselves seem to not be up to the task of making the desired effort you seem to be hinting at.

In any case, as the thread originator has stated they are done with this, perhaps it's time for a lock?

Hey dont make a sweeping generalisation, I for one never thought of the ToY as that.. But yes, it does take 2, but if one does seem a little unapproachable its difficult sometimes, I did try to join the NDA and i even tried to start a RP with Treznor, neither have come to frutition so.. meh.

It's hardly appropriate to paint us with the brush of supposed 'arrogance' or 'elitism' when you yourselves seem to not be up to the task of making the desired effort you seem to be hinting at.

You mean the mistakes in information regarding the Triumvirate? The ones that would have been smoothed out OOCly beforehand had we actually decided to OOCly approach the Triumvirate for an ESUS-ToY war?

Hey dont make a sweeping generalisation, I for one never thought of the ToY as that.. But yes, it does take 2, but if one does seem a little unapproachable its difficult sometimes, I did try to join the NDA and i even tried to start a RP with Treznor, neither have come to frutition so.. meh.I can't think of anyone less unapproachable than Scolopendra, but I can see where folk might get that impression of the Dread Lady. If you don't know her, the name and her reputation make her seem like she eats small children.

Honestly, she doesn't. Even when served with her favourite sauce.

As for that RP, that's my fault. I started it, lost it when Arenumberg couldn't post for a while, then when the post and telegram came through explaining about these seven-foot-tall living weapon creatures...I tried to find any sort of commonality in order to describe Grant's reaction and couldn't think of anything beyond a heart attack. So I put it off, hoping inspiration would strike later. So, mea culpa. I am strictly to blame there.

lol you can replace it with a normal humanoid now if you want, had another "image change".. oh yes, Would be Asiatic Humanoid, lol.

You mean the mistakes in information regarding the Triumvirate? The ones that would have been smoothed out OOCly beforehand had we actually decided to OOCly approach the Triumvirate for an ESUS-ToY war?

No, I mean it hardly seems fair to say we're arrogant and unapproachable and such if you, who seemed to want the rp, weren't willing to talk to us about it. No more, no less. Mistakes in intel happen - that's why folks generally talk or try to exchange info. Had one of your own not posted like this, had you approached us, yes, likely things would have been smoothed out. Point is, that's not how it panned out, so now I suppose we'll never know.

In any case, however far or not far at all any thoughts along those lines get, it just seems that before folks get all gung-ho about things, it does tend to be polite ettiquite to see if the other party is even interested or available. Regardless of how over-the-top the proposition may or may not appear to be.

Please bear in mind, these are all my personal observations and opinions, and I do not presume to speak for my entire alliance.

Again, best of luck with getting things straightened out on your end, and I am sorry that your member or former member who had complaints chose to voice them using this method. These sorts of situations tend not to help anyone in the long run, regardless of what side of it one finds themselves on.