NationStates Jolt Archive

CEO's office, Sirens of Titan Citystate

The CEO was having a bad day until he found something interesting. He was browsing around the internet when he dug up a free online roleplaying game called NationStates. Everything that's free is ok, so he signed up. After he was done filling in all the questions his nation (Sirens of Titan, how original) was somewhat strange. 'This is wrong. Sirens of Titan isn't a "Democratic Socialist" nation. We are a police-city-state. Democracy! What a most absurd idea. Let's see if I can drop a complaint, obviously a technological issue. I mean, how can those people forget us?' The CEO browsed around and found the getting help page. He dropped the following message there:
Hello. I have a small question/complainment. I made a new nation today and I am quite unhappy with the UN category. First we have no ties with the UN (curse them) and secondly I am not a democratic socialist nation. Please fix this.
Thanks!'Okay, that's done. Hey, an issue. "Should democracy be compulsory?" No of course not. I don't like democracy at all. Outlawed elections, that's better.' The CEO felt good; he even eradicated democracy on a webserver. While he was looking around the world he noticed something wasn't right as well. The population! Sirens of Titan received the two billionth citizen some time ago and... In the game I am only five million! Five! How ridiculous, this must be a bug in the software. He moaned a bit and moved over the forum. With his recent victory over democracy, a forum wouldn't be a challange wouldn't it? The CEO noticed the technical forum, a very well suited place to drop these most annoying issues. He wrote the following post:
Hello, I have two things which are wrong. My number of citizens must be increased with two billion (Sirens of Titan is two billion check the factbooks) and my national title is completely wrong. We are a Society, not any of those in the drop downlist. Please fix this.
Thanks! The CEO checked back to his nation and a telegram arrived. The CEO was quite surprised when he saw the message, and was thinking of speaking to someone more executive. Seriously, it's outrageous! A scandal of the highest order! How dares this person to reject a most humble request from the Sirens of Titan Society! Here's what is said:
Sorry, but you can only change your UN category by the issue options you choose. And about the UN, if you don't like it don't be a member of it.
The CEO returned to the forum and start to read some threads.

OOC: Back, with a few minor adjustments. I deleted it because, well. Because I did.

OOC: Why did you delete it? I thought it was a good idea. Put it back, and I'll reply to it.

Done!

Dictator Zina Ramirez sat in her vast, somewhat eclectically decorated office, chewing at her lip as she frowned at her computer screen. She was pondering the sense of pretending to be the ruler of a nation, when she already had a nice little land full of three and a half billion real, flesh and blood people to play around with. When she had first come across NationStates a few minutes ago, she had almost closed it again without a second thought. But now...

“Could be fun...” she murmured to herself. Running a real nation occasionally proved a hassle, after all. It would be nice to escape a little into make-belief. She clicked on ‘Create a nation’.

Ah, a first decision to impose on her new realm. A name! She thought about it a mere second or two, then giggled and typed in, ‘Sunshine Roses’. Well, no one would know it was actually her... She checked the droplist for a full name. ‘Psychotopia’, for some reason, wasn’t an available option, and she felt a little disappointed. She wrinkled her nose in distaste as she looked over the choices on offer. ‘Dictatorship’ seemed so... bland! How could you be a dictator without a bit of creativity?

Wait... A slow smile appeared on her lips, and, on an impulse, she selected ‘Democratic Republic’, and grinned excitedly. Oh, this game could be fun! She would make this fictitious nation a democracy, of all things! A quaint, silly little democracy.

It took her some thinking to get through the questions before her nation was created, as she struggled to work out what a democratic leader would choose; this was proving to be more of a challenge than she would have imagined. Once her nation was completed, she spent a while looking it over fondly. She had just created an entire country. She felt quite proud of herself.

Originally, from the insanely long droplist of national flags, she had selected that of Yn, but somehow it didn’t quite seem right for her precious little ‘Democratic Republic of Sunshine Roses.’ So she spent a few minutes creating one that was bright pink, uploaded it, and smiled proudly. Now, what else was there to do?

She clicked on ‘Issues’, and began reading. It was entitled ‘The Great Wall of Sunshine Roses?’. As she read, her eyes lit up. What a stupendously brilliant idea! String the borders with mines, and put cameras there to entertain the public! Now why had I never thought of that? As soon as she had finished fooling around with this game, she would have to implement it for real, in Yn. She giggled excitedly at the thought. Of course, the sad thing was that no illegal immigrants ever tried to get into Yn anyway... She was about to click on the option to blow pesky intruders to bits, when she held her finger back at the last instant.

Wait, I’m a democracy! A democracy might not do that... She bit her lip, slightly frustrated, considered the other two options, and finally decided to welcome all the poor little refugees. That done, she turned to the game’s other features... and soon discovered the forums.

She gave a little giggle of glee. This looked amusing! Now, what to do? She skimmed through a few threads, trying to get the general feel of the game; it was quite puzzling really. Her perverse little mind ticking, she considered how to take part. Then she smiled. She would see if her Sunshine Roses could find some friends. The notion of having friends was, to her, a deliciously perverse one, as Yn had no friends... nor enemies for that matter, its borders being virtually sealed tight. Well, in this game, she would have friends. She gave a gleeful little giggle…

Several minutes later, she sat back and admired her work. The thread was called: ‘Looking for friendly friends.’

Hello, world! We’re new, and looking for friends. We want to establish diplomatic relations, those funny things. This is an official invitation for relations by the government of the Sunshine Roses. Please respond!

She crossed her legs, and waited to see what would happen…

It was a hot night in Sike kali. There was no wind, which would chill the air after this very humid day. First Lentine Hangila Sede had been busy the enire day, but now she eventually returned home. "Gojna Ligat!" she muttered while entering, "Gojna Developmentists!" she muttered while going to the kitchen in order to get some lychee juice. The Ligat Party and the Developmentists are in a coalition with the Worker's Front, the social democratic party of Rejistania. Today, she just prevented another crises between these three parties, which have pretty diametral interests. On the table, she saw a note: "Hey Ma, As you wanted, I installed the 'net acces for you. Hope you like! Mayb' try www.nationstates.net, you'll like definitely!" it was signed by a symbol, which was intended to mean LS for Lyku Sede, her son. She started up her ADVANSID and logged in. She typed "konihekta" into the shell and the operating SIstem (it is called SI) gave her some messages, the most important being "la'konihekta", connected. Then she opened her browser (Lyku had to tell her about this) and as fun, she loaded NS: "vh www.nationstates.net". She had to laugh as she read the page (and again wanted an SI finally supporting graphics mode). A nation simulation game?

Hangila Sede decided to sign up. (TBC)

Hangila Sede first read the FAQ (finding the limits of her knowledge of English), she decided that it was worth a try and selected (yes, not clicked since the ADVANSID has no mouse) 'Create a nation' from the 'preview_options' frame. Country name... hmmm... Rejistania would be too obvious as would 'Tani Hangila' or similar forms... after a while she decided for a name, she knew from something called RL: America, or as she knew it in rejistanized form: Amerikanha. Now for government style, sensible... nah, she has too much to do with that in her job. Suddenly she had a strange idea... make that nation the most extremist nation ... and in a bad way! Government style: psychotic, national title 'Dictatorship' (she made plans to change it to 'Banana Republic' later). The flag... default since her browser could not display graphics. She answered the questions in the most evil way she could. Later she saw the nation's factbook page and giggled. She browsed through the game and found a link to the forums, she followed it. Eeeeek! That page *does* look awful! Slani Graphic-lovers! Somehow she found the way to International Incidents and the link to start a new thread. With a nearly-insane giggle, she started writing: "I DECLAER WAR ON TEH HOLE WURLD!!!"