NationStates Jolt Archive

Bryn Shander purchases steel penises.

Giant aluminum foil condoms under construction.

Friday, December 24th, 2xxx

(KBC) -- In an unexpected move, the Kingdom of Bryn Shander has announced that it has purchased a pair of Doujin Class super-dreadnoughts from the the Sensible Commonwealth of The Freethinkers

Most likely in response to the death of the UnAPS, as well as announcements of military increase by some of Haven's other states, the Kingdom of Bryn Shander purchased the two massive ships to aid in the defense of it's Haven territory, the Principality of Forodren Annon.

The ships, which will be moved to an as of yet unnamed city, will be renamed, refitted, and repainted to fit in better with the Principality's current naval forces, which are currently made up of Serpent Class frigates and Talos Class destroyers. Plans are also underway to design and build new ships that will be used exclusively in the wet navy.

Although King Damien Nightbane was unable to be reached for comment, Princess Season Amastacia, governor of Forodren Annon, had the following to say: "While we are not worried about the collapse of the UnAPS, or the military buildup in the region, we cannot help but to prepare for conflict. We hope that the new Haven will be just as safe as the old Haven, but we will not stand idly around and leave our safety to hopes and dreams."

Our sources say that the two ships will cost the Kingdom something in the neighborhood of 100 billion USD.

Official Communique

Freethinker Ministry Of Defence Official Announcement

"We are delighted to confirm the sale of the Doujin-class Super Dreadnought FNS Sir John Barham (B-03) and the FNS Puerto Valadola (B-05) to the Kingdom of Bryn Shander in a deal brokered between our respective Navies.

"With the Nautilas program underway, the need to maintain four Doujin-class vessels to maintain our capability against Super-Dreadnoughts has been diminished, and as such the Freethinker Navy is to decommision these two vessels in the very near future. When the Bryn Shandar Navy expressed a desire for such vessels, the two warships were offered in lieu of newly completed vessels, at both a cheaper cost and a considerably shorter delivery period."

"Therefore, in a deal estimated at M72 Billion (approximately $100 Billion), the two Doujin class vessels will instead be overhauled and transferred to the Bryn Shander Navy within a time period of six to twelve months.

"FNS Sir John Barham is currently in drydock at the Port Blanche Naval Shipyard facility, undergoing standard maintenance and refuelling. She will now be retrofitted in dock with new electronic and other units, and have certain Freethinker military systems removed in preparation for the transfer. She will be formally decommisioned on the 26th December 20xx, when she will placed under Bryn Shander authority."

"FNS Puerto Valadola is currently serving as flagship of the Haven Midland Territory Battlegroup. She will enter drydock in the city that shares her name, and will be formally decommissioned on the 2nd January 20xx. She will then be towed to the territory of Forodren Annon for her formal refit and entrance to the Bryn Shander navy."

"We view this move as a significant positive move for both our nation's militaries, and we will look forward in the future to further cooperation in support of our mutual security."

24th December 20xx.

OOC:
Come on Bryn, we all know we call STUPIDly huge ships both wet navy and space 'steel penises' to make fun of them but you should know you're better than >that< to make it a title.

The Hack is pleased that Bryn Shander has owned up and is finally calling the Doujin what it really is.

- Dargan Zaraad, Office of Unofficial Official Statements
The Semi-Autonomous Technocratic Oligarchy of the Most Glorious Hack

OOC: *Glares evily at Hack.*

OOC: *Glares evily at Hack.*
ooc: *blinks innocently at Freethinkers, avoiding mention of Yui*

ooc: *blinks innocently at Freethinkers, avoiding mention of Yui*

Arrr, this be hijackin' of ter thread! I'll makes ye walks tha' plank, scurvy landlubber!