Allanea
04-12-2004, 20:23
State of Aissur, Allanea
Michael Ravager, a famous Aissurian talk-radio host, chuckled. “So, peeps, we’ve all been pretty annoyed when the neanderthal’s up in Goobergunch city condemn that corporation, what was it’s name, Dolphin or such? Well, I’ve given it some thought, there, and, you know, there’s no reason to be angry. After all, they have no evil intent. The hilbillies up north just don’t know any better, you know. They’ve been living that way for centuries. Look – their government doesn’t even need to get a standing army to oppress them – they are so far gone they actually willingly submit to the nonsense. Now, behind all this, I, Michael Ravager, give you an idea: We should help the poor folks.”
He paused, revelling in the sudden silence in the studio. He glanced at the shocked faces of the studio crew behind the large glass wall in front of him and thought of all the people all over Aissur that paused for a second, petrified: what kind of insanity would the maverick host suggest this time? A war? An invasion? Or actual help of some form to Goobergunchians – creatures whom most Allaneans patently despised?
“Well,” he continued, “obviously we ain’t going to send the Marines there to take ‘em out of their misery – though they have definitely suffered enough. We are going to do better. A friend of mine down in Daikatana has one of ‘em high-power AM stations he won’t need no more– he’s closing shop and moving to Mars, of all things. Anyhow, here’s what I suggest: let us buy the station. Let us put it on a small boat – just the kind those Dolphin people use – and take it as far out to the North-West Gulf as we can – and give the Goobergunchians the message of freedom.”
A few days later
Michael blinked. “What now?”
The idea he has suggested jokingly a few days ago has mushroomed out of any proportions. Over a thousand people have taken it seriously, and bombarded him with checks and money – admittedly, not much, only about twenty thousand, in total – and even suggestion about what to put on the first broadcast.
“Well, sir, Dolphin, Inc, called. They said they will willingly sponsor this. So have Allanean Entertainment.”
Ravage gaped at the secretary. “Oh well. Tell Entertainment we’re going for it. We’re probably going to last long as a show, but hell, imagine what it will look like on the resume/
And so the preparations began.
Michael Ravager, a famous Aissurian talk-radio host, chuckled. “So, peeps, we’ve all been pretty annoyed when the neanderthal’s up in Goobergunch city condemn that corporation, what was it’s name, Dolphin or such? Well, I’ve given it some thought, there, and, you know, there’s no reason to be angry. After all, they have no evil intent. The hilbillies up north just don’t know any better, you know. They’ve been living that way for centuries. Look – their government doesn’t even need to get a standing army to oppress them – they are so far gone they actually willingly submit to the nonsense. Now, behind all this, I, Michael Ravager, give you an idea: We should help the poor folks.”
He paused, revelling in the sudden silence in the studio. He glanced at the shocked faces of the studio crew behind the large glass wall in front of him and thought of all the people all over Aissur that paused for a second, petrified: what kind of insanity would the maverick host suggest this time? A war? An invasion? Or actual help of some form to Goobergunchians – creatures whom most Allaneans patently despised?
“Well,” he continued, “obviously we ain’t going to send the Marines there to take ‘em out of their misery – though they have definitely suffered enough. We are going to do better. A friend of mine down in Daikatana has one of ‘em high-power AM stations he won’t need no more– he’s closing shop and moving to Mars, of all things. Anyhow, here’s what I suggest: let us buy the station. Let us put it on a small boat – just the kind those Dolphin people use – and take it as far out to the North-West Gulf as we can – and give the Goobergunchians the message of freedom.”
A few days later
Michael blinked. “What now?”
The idea he has suggested jokingly a few days ago has mushroomed out of any proportions. Over a thousand people have taken it seriously, and bombarded him with checks and money – admittedly, not much, only about twenty thousand, in total – and even suggestion about what to put on the first broadcast.
“Well, sir, Dolphin, Inc, called. They said they will willingly sponsor this. So have Allanean Entertainment.”
Ravage gaped at the secretary. “Oh well. Tell Entertainment we’re going for it. We’re probably going to last long as a show, but hell, imagine what it will look like on the resume/
And so the preparations began.